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‘Every ending is a new beginning’ -Marianne Williamson

Photo by Sherrie Norris

publisher Gene Fowler

executive editor Tom Mayer

editor Sherrie Norris sherrie@aawmag.com 828.264.3612, ext. 251

writers Catherine Bare Heather Brandon Sharon Carlton Bonnie Church Yozette “Yogi” Collins Jeff Eason Heather Jordan Linda Killian Louise Obrien Adam Orr Kelly Penick Heather Samudio Sue Spirit

production & design Jennifer Canosa Meleah Bryan

advertising Anna Roseman 828.264.6397, ext. 271

cover photo

by Sherrie Norris

Any reproduction of news articles, photographs or advertising artwork is strictly prohibited without permission from management. ©Copyright 2013 A Mountain Times Publication

contents news bits leigh cooper wallace natalie buchanan peggy hartzog mary wilbur you go girl: eliza eason celebrating sisterhood the haven appalachian brian estates amy justice young at heart healthy lady mom’s world keisha wilson beauty high country courtesies home dÊcor and more the superior wolf club school days make school lunches fun

amy justice

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leigh cooper wallace

natalie buchanan

peggy hartzog

mary wilbur

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

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editor’s note

It’s August, already.

Who can believe it?

just lost rader who had A smiling first-g e that this clu a didn’t have her front tooth, for 12 re st’ school pictu would be her ‘be . bmitted years. Photos su

By third gra de, and so early in life, says, thing Sherrie s began to get really b picture day. ad on

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

I have many memories from the early Augusts of my childhood, but one of my not-so-favorite recollections surrounds an event that occurred either a day or two before the new school year began, or a day or two later, just in time for the school pictures to be taken.

The traditional back-to-school haircut — I still cringe to think about it.

I will never forget how my mother, rest her soul, held my chin with one hand (to keep me still) while quickly maneuvering the scissors across my forehead with the other.

Why, oh why, did she have to do that? Bangs – ugh! And, of course, I couldn’t be still, so when they were cut crooked, whose fault was that? And, then, the more she tried to straighten them, the more she had to cut.

Dare I say that I hate most of my school pictures?

My first grade photo wasn’t too bad, even if I had just lost a front tooth. But, the haircut “thing” was already obvious.

The second grade’s were awful, and the third?

Well, my little mama didn’t get hold of me that time, but my cousin Bill’s wife did and was she in the mood to snip!

My little fat cheeks, red from the Rutherford County sun where I had spent a few weeks prior with her and my other relatives, were glowing around my new cut.

I had little hair left to cover my ears, let alone enough to help hide the apples.

By sixth-grade, my sister Gail decided to practice her styling skills on me — and teased my hair to resemble a big bird’s nest the morning of school photos. Seventh and eighth grades, again, mom butchered the bangs.

Little wonder, then, once I entered high school, I let my hair grow long, I experimented with some peroxide, got an “afro” as it was called back then, and that’s just the beginning.

I implore you, mothers — take it easy on the haircuts. Just because it’s the start of a new school year doesn’t mean the kids have to go with a new look.

Place your attention elsewhere, like, maybe on the lunchbox or making sure your kids have shoes — you know, something that people really notice these days. Just don't cut the hair.

By second grade, the pictures bega n to go downhill, right along with the an nual back-to-school ha ircuts.

Sherrie h school, out of hig ever wear bangs t h g ri , lly Fina uld n at she wo do so. decided th less she wanted to n u — in a ag

newsbits&clips Back to School Festival Several local organizations are sponsoring a unique back to school festival from 10 a.m.-3 p.m. on Saturday, August 10, at the National Guard Armory in Boone.

Free school supplies, jeans, haircuts, pajamas, food and more will be available.

For details on how to help or to provide information about your child’s needs, sizes, etc., call (828) 262-5424.

The Incredible Years Do you need new strategies to increase positive behaviors in your children while guiding them toward school readiness and academic success?

An upcoming program at the Children’s Council of Watauga County can provide tips on ways to manage children’s difficult behaviors. Learning positive discipline techniques will increase parental confidence. As negative behaviors decrease, children will gain more self-esteem. This 14-week class was popular last year and they are offering it again.

Session One: for parents of children ages 2-8; held weekly beginning September 4 at The Children's Council from 5:00-7:30pm; free childcare and food provided.

Session 2: for parents of children ages 6-12; weekly from 12 p.m. - 2 p.m., beginning September 5 in the conference room at The Hospitality House Registration deadline is August 26. Class size is limited, so register early by calling Robin at (828) 262-5424 or emailing robin@thechildrenscouncil.org.

Because good manners don’t just happen.

Registration now open for High Country Cotillion Weekend Session The ability to easily transition from familiar, casual social skills of daily life to more formal skills needed for special occasions doesn’t just happen naturally, says Sharon Carlton, owner and director of High Country Cotillion.

A new weekend session of High Country Cotillion designed to help your students (grades 5-12) through those awkward times of their lives, begins in September.

Students will be taught introduction skills to confidently present themselves, as well as the art of conversation, social media and cell phone etiquette, appropriate dress for success, dining etiquette and much more.

Enthusiastic young leaders will help motivate their students to practice important skills needed to cope with the demands of today, while preparing them to succeed tomorrow.

Cotillion leaders use classic and contemporary dance instruction as a tool to model appropriate interactions, while directing students to apply new skills through skits, roleplaying and games.

Fore more information, visit www.highcountrycotillion.com, or call (828) 773-1981.

Wearing their best ‘tacky prom’ attire, Ashe County’s Gracie Greene and Valle Crucis resident Will Rankin share a dance during a special event at High Country Cotillion. Photo by Sharon Carlton

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

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newsbits&clips

Beth Moore Simulcast at Mount Vernon Baptist Church Mount Vernon Baptist Church of Boone will be hosting a one-day, video simulcast with Beth Moore that is expected to inspire women of all ages across the globe to dig deep into God’s Word.

The event will take place 9 a.m. – 4:30 p.m. on Saturday, September 14, at the church worship center.

Women from the High Country and beyond are invited to be part of this special opportunity featuring one of the country’s foremost female Bible study leaders, who will be joined by Boone’s own Travis Cottrell, as worship leader.

Seating is limited.

Tickets are $20 each and include

lunch, snacks and study materials.

Call the church office on or after August 12 at (828) 266-9700) to purchase tickets.

The church is located at 3505 Bamboo Road in Boone.

Charity Golf Tournament Brings Community Together High Country Caregiver Foundation and Blowing Rock C.A.R.E.S. have been named recipients of the 7th annual Charity Golf Tournament hosted by Casa Rustica Restaurant.

The event, scheduled for Thursday, August 15 at Boone Golf Club in Boone, promises to be a great day of golf, food and prizes — all in the name of community spirit.

Entry fee is $125 per player and includes greens and cart fee, mulligans,

lunch and dinner, which will be held afterward at the clubhouse, provided by Casa Rustica.

Prizes will be awarded for the shot closest to the pins, hole-in-one and all day raffles.

The 4-Man Captain’s Choice tournament will be complete with white T-shirts for the men players, red for the ladies, and gold for both men and women over the age of 70.

Sponsorships are still available.

Entry forms can be downloaded at the following websites: www.boonegolfclub.com and www.casarustica1981.com, at High Country Caregiver Foundation Facebook page, or they can be picked up at the Boone Golf Club.

For more information, contact Art Adams at (828) 264-8760 or Rick Pedroni, (828)406-7085 or by emailing casarusticaboone@gmail.com.

August Medical Listings

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

newsbits&clips Wendy Green Honored by Allstate As a business leader and involved citizen in the Boone area, Wendy W. Green, owner of The Wendy Green All State Agency, has been honored for providing outstanding customer service and named an Allstate Premier Agency for 2013.

Less than 38 percent of Allstate’s nearly 10,000 agency owners across the country receive this designation, which Green earned for her outstanding performance and commitment to putting customers at the center of her agency’s work. The award is given to to Allstate agency owners who have demonstrated excellence in delivering an accessible, knowledgeable and personal customer experience, and in achieving outstanding business results.

The Wendy Green Agency is located at 869 Hwy. 105 Ext Suite 1 in Boone and can be reached at (828) 264-6828.

The Allstate Corporation is the nation’s largest publicly held personal lines insurer, serving approximately 16 million households through its Allstate, Encompass, Esurance and Answer Financial brand names and Allstate Financial business segment.

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The late Leigh Cooper Wallace pictured with her husband, Chris Wallace. Photo by Mark Mitchell

Leigh Cooper Wallace 2013 Woman of Vision: legacy of late educator lives on Some people make such an impact on others that their legacy lasts much longer than their lives.

Such is the case with Leigh Cooper Wallace, a coach, teacher and mentor to hundreds of students at Watauga High School. Leigh died in December 2012, yet the positive impression she left on others lives on.

The Appalachian Women’s Fund named Leigh its Woman of Vision for 2013 at its annual Women of Vision Luncheon at Linville Ridge Country Club on Thursday, June 27.

Accepting the award on behalf of Leigh was her husband, Chris Wallace, sister Julie Cooper Hodge and her in-laws, Candace and Ray Wallace.

“A couple of weeks before she died, we were hosting some teachers from Pakistan,” said Chris Wallace. “They had a

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

somewhat unfavorable view of Americans, particularly about the way we treated our elderly. Leigh spent countless hours with them, late into the night, and completely changed their opinion on how they perceived America. They were constantly telling me how beautiful Leigh was, both inside and out, and how lucky I was.

“This award has helped to make the past six months more tolerable.”

Leigh’s legacy includes starting up the local chapter of Girls on the Run, an organization that encourages young girls and teenagers to be more active and increase their self esteem. Her motto was “You are stronger than you think.”

She also spoke publicly to girls about a 1989 incident in which she was abducted and raped by Daniel Lee when she was 20. Lee had murdered another young woman, Jenny Gray, five days earlier and took Leigh to the same place off of Jake’s

Mountain Road and sexually assaulted her there.

“Leigh not only survived her attack, she thrived after her attack,” said Cathy Williamson to the luncheon crowd of 320.

“Leigh knew that rape was about control and dominance. From that night forward, Leigh would never be dominated again.”

Leigh escaped from Lee and told her story to the police.

“Leigh gave police enough information to find her assailant and put him on death row for the murder of Jenny Gray,” said Cathy.

After the presentation of the Woman of Vision Award, a live auction was held for five items, including round trip Southwestern Airlines tickets to any place in the United States, a week at a beach house at Heron’s Landing on Ocracoke Island, a sculpture to be commissioned by artist Alex Hallmark, professional landscape

The Appalachian Women’s Fund named Leigh its Woman of Vision for 2013 at its annual Women of Vision Luncheon design, and one week’s lodging for eight people at Deer Creek Ranch in Montana.

The five items were auctioned for a total of $9,600.

The luncheon also featured a silent auction that included items donated from more than 150 businesses and individuals.

“I read a testimonial by a young woman who was taking part in a program funded by the Appalachian Women’s Fund,” said Cathy. As I read, I kept finding myself unable to connect with her words. Our experiences were different. Our marriages were different. Our points of view and our vision of the world were very different.

“After time in an abusive marriage, she turned to drugs as a way to cope. What spoke to my heart and my mind about her story, was her observation that she began

wearing only long sleeves. That got me thinking about what long sleeves mean to me and to you.”

Cathy spoke about how long sleeves can be used to hide needle tracks, bruises from abuse, signs of an eating disorder or even self-mutilation.

“As strong, healthy, independent women we know all about long sleeves,” she said. “We roll them up when a tough job comes our way. We get busy and we get moving until the job is done.

“As emotional, caring, loving women, we wear our hearts on our sleeves. We see weak and make it strong. We see wrong and make it right. We see despair and we find joy.”

The mission of the Appalachian Women’s Fund is to be a “philanthropic catalyst

for social change and economic justice with the goal of creating a community where all women and girls reach their full potential.”

The AWF raises funds and distributes them to organizations in Watauga, Ashe and Avery counties that serve women and children. Those organizations include OASIS (Opposing Abuse with Service, Information and Shelter), ASHE (A Safe Home for Everyone), the Western Youth Network, New Opportunity School for Women, The Children’s Council and Blue Ridge Women in Agriculture, among others.

JeFF EASON Editor, The Blowing Rocket

Natalie Buchanan 80 pounds later — ‘It’s all in the mind’ A lifetime of frustration, embarrassment and depression has ended through Natalie Buchanan’s successful weight loss journey, with the help of her family and friends, including daughter, Jessica, left, and son, Justin. Photos submitted

Avery County’s Natalie Buchanan has reached an incredible milestone on her weight loss journey that most of us only dream about — 80 pounds gone.

She did it in seven months — through willpower and with the support and encouragement of family and friends.

But, it didn’t come easily for one whose battle with food started as a high school sophomore.

Weighing 135 pounds wasn’t a real problem, she says, but to prevent it from becoming a concern, she started skipping meals.

A binge-eating pattern ensued, keeping her below 145 pounds through high school and onto marriage in 1985.

“Very conscious” of her weight at that time, Natalie bought her first exercise bike and used it regularly; for about two years, she stayed “around 150 pounds.”

The merry-go-round ride begins At 22, happily married and working at Baxter Laboratory, she became pregnant with her daughter, Jessica, and had to take an early maternity leave. With extra time on her hands to eat, she gained 60 pounds, 20 of which she lost (with the help of overthe-counter diet pills,” after her daughter’s birth in 1989.

Within the next year, she regained the weight and then began trying “every diet out there,” she says.

With Weight Watchers, she lost 20 pounds. She tried the cabbage soup diet, the three-day Mayo Clinic Diet, Atkins, ate

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

only fruit and veggies — “and every diet pill on the market.”

She tried Slim Fast, the apple and vinegar diet, the grapefruit diet, the Zone; she vomited and she took laxatives — something she’s not proud of.

All it did was make her sick and crave more food.

With prescription diet pills she lost 50 pounds, but regained it all.

Pregnant with her son, Justin, she again required an early maternity leave, “ate a lot,” she says, and gained another 62 pounds.

Returning to work became depressing; food became her solace.

She quit that job in 1997 and took an office job; she sat all day — and ate.

A year later, at 300 pounds, she started a second job at Crossnore Day Care and loved it.

She was eating less, but started the fad diets again.

In 2002, she lost 50 pounds with the prescription diet pill Phenterimine.

“I loved working with the children, but I was so unhealthy,” she says. “I could not get down on the floor and play with them.

If I did, I was so embarrassed, trying to get back up.”

Reality hits hard.

While on a nature walk with the kids one day — and out of breath, Natalie had to stop.

“One little girl asked me why I was breathing hard,” she says. “I told her I was unhealthy.”

That was the easy part.

“The children always told me that I was

fat,” she says. “They asked me why I had a big belly and even one told me I had a big butt. Children are so honest.”

Natalie gained back the 50 pounds — and more.

In 2009, the daycare closed and her mother became critically ill.

“I took a weekend-shift job (at the group home where I am currently employed) so I could care for my mom during the week,” she says.

Food was always available and her resistance was low. Her main concern was her mother, whose deteriorating condition added to Natalie’s depression. Food was her comfort and her stress reliever.

Natalie’s husband, Rick, worried about her weight and lovingly encouraged her to lose it.

“He begged me to try to get healthy,” she says. “I would tell him that I was, but secretly, I still binged. I knew he would be disappointed.”

Natalie was “just miserable with life,” she says.

And, the scales didn’t help.

Slowly, the weight crept up. With continued fad diets and diet pills, she kept losing (and gaining) the same 20 pounds.

In 2012, she reached 330 pounds.

Her depression and embarrassment escalated following a trip to the beach —“my favorite place in the world,” she says.

Her mother’s condition worsened, too.

Food became her “happy place,” Natalie says. “I decided then that I was not going to diet anymore; I was just going to stay fat and miserable.”

Her mother begged her to lose weight, telling Natalie that she would die from a

heart attack if she didn’t.

“It broke my heart when she told me I was fat, but I could not get motivated,” she says.

In December 2012, Natalie’s mother passed away.

Natalie was “completely lost” and ate her way through her grief — to 354 pounds.

She had been diagnosed with severe sleep apnea and pre-diabetes, which required medication. The pain in her body was excruciating, her mental state “in a mess.”

She could do nothing physical without pain; she wondered how she could go on.

Taking her anger (and embarrassment) out on her family made things worse, she says; “My size prevented me from doing anything fun with them.”

Nothing motivated her — even the upcoming marriages of both her children.

A turning point One day, Natalie and her husband began talking about rewards. He agreed that for every 10 pounds she lost, he would do something special for her.

After the first 10, they went to a movie; the next 10 pounds landed Natalie with a pedicure and manicure.

“After 20 pounds, I was liking the rewards and getting happy,” she says, thus, watching her calories and consuming only 1,200 calories a day.

Thirty pounds later, she got a new pair of Asic tennis shoes.

When she reached 40 pounds, it was off to Pigeon Forge.

“At 60 pounds, I got my biggest reward — my Coach pocketbook,” she says.

The tangible rewards became less important — it was more about how she looked and felt.

“I was just anxious for the next five pounds to disappear,” she says. “I began to be happy again.”

Eight months and 80 pounds later, Natalie is a new woman — “completely changed, “ she says.

A New Routine Natalie got serious about losing weight on January 12, 2013 and implemented the following: Breakfast: Special K cereal or a healthy breakfast sandwich.

Mid-morning: a 100-calorie snack — a Skinny Cow candy bar or ice cream, fresh fruit, snack packs or almonds.

Lunch: usually a plain turkey sandwich

on flat bread, with low calorie cheese with fresh fruit or veggies Mid-day snack: usually fruit or veggies Dinner: Salads, Weight Watchers or Lean Cuisine meals and fruits and veggies and eating nothing after 6 p.m.

Beverages: At least four large glasses of water a day; bottled/flavored water for variety; diet drinks limited to two per week.

No salt: “I am at a point that I crave healthy food, I do not crave the junk food like I used to,” she says.

Starting a two- lap walk at the Riverwalk in Newland, she says, was embarrassing and a struggle. Today, she can’t wait for her one-mile walk, seven days a week, and even with an umbrella, if needed.

It’s her “quiet time,” she says, that she enjoys in the midst of nature — “and a reminder of God’s grace and beauty and the strength that he gives me every morning.”

An added bonus — her husband often walks with her. “I love our time together; his support is amazing,” she says.

Not an easy journey Natalie has had “many hard days on this journey,” she says, but her determination to succeed has been worth it all.

“Usually, once supper is done and dishes are washed, I turn off the kitchen light, which tells me that I am not allowed back in the kitchen,” she says. “Some days this works well, some days I have gone to bed at 7 p.m. to resist the temptation.”

Her son’s wedding cake proved to be a huge challenge, she admits.

She rewarded herself with a small piece, but with “a lot left over,” she took it home, fighting temptation every step of the way.

“For two days, I wanted that cake so bad,” she says. The craving was so strong, but I refused to give in. I knew I wouldn’t stop at one piece.”

Finally, she cut the cake into pieces and froze them for her husband to enjoy later. “I couldn’t just throw it away, it was too expensive,” she says.

Planning ahead, reading menus and counting calories became key to her success.

“I have cheated and gained a couple of pounds here and there, but have always gotten back on track the next morning,” she says. “I have come too far to turn back.”

And, if she happens to forget, her sweet husband, family members and friends, including those on Facebook, are quick to remind her and offer words of encourage-

ment.

“To hear your husband or child tell you that they are proud of you — that’s very special.”

There have been days, she says, when she was ready to give up. “But the Lord would pop the right person into my life with the exact words of encouragement that I needed to keep on going.”

A New Beginning Natalie can now paint her toenails, tie her shoes, hike, mow the yard, shop and do fun things with her family,” she says. “I can cross my legs and walk up and down stairs. I can wear cuter clothes, get up out of a beach chair and off the sofa and drive without the steering wheel in my stomach — and I can get in and out of my husbands truck without struggling.”

And, she spends her evenings at the YMCA, something that was “very uncomfortable,” at first.

“If my daughter hadn’t gone with me, I wouldn’t have started alone,” she says.

“Her fiancé also started going, so when my daughter doesn’t go, he fills in for her.”

Eighty pounds lighter, Natalie is enjoying life; she wakes up refreshed — mentally and physically. “I can’t describe just how good I feel,” she says.

If she can do it, Natalie says, anyone can.

“Don’t let weight, depression and embarrassment ruin your life. Get in touch with me and we’ll walk through the journey together. I’m not a expert, but I sure have learned a lot these past few months.”

Without the Lord and her family and friends, Natalie says, she couldn’t have done it. And, she knows that her “sweet mama in heaven,” would be so proud.

“You have to set your mind to make changes and decide to lose weight,” she says. “It’s all in the mind.”

Natalie says she is thankful for the opportunity to share her story and hopes it can help motivate others.

To continue following her journey, find Natalie on Facebook — or in the mornings at the River Walk in Newland.

sherrie norris Editor, All About Women

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

13

After battling cancer for more than a decade, Peggy Hartzog

Ashe native Peggy Hartzog was first diagnosed with melanoma in 1996 and has fought the disease twice more, in 2006 and 2009. Photo by Adam Orr

Still a survivor Peggy Hartzog beats cancer

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

has an important message to pass on.

“Until you’ve breathed that last breath, you’ve got hope,” Hartzog says. “There’s so much out there to do and see, and there is no reason to sit around and not move.”

After graduating from Jefferson High School in 1957, and later Appalachian State University, Peggy married her husband, Howard, and settled into a long career with AT&T in Winston-Salem. She retired in 1995, excited about the prospect of traveling the country with Howard.

But a physician assistant noticed something odd on her ear during a routine checkup in 1996 “The PA said, ‘If that’s not melanoma, I’ve never seen it.’ Turns out, it was melanoma, so they had it removed and I thought that was the end of it,” Peggy says.

It was, at least that’s how it seemed to Peggy, whose follow-up exams found her healthy and cancer free — until 2006.

“I finally had to head to the doctor because I was just dragging all the time — I couldn’t hardly move,” she says. “Following an exam, the doctor told me I looked pretty good, except for a spot of something going on in my right lung.”

After follow-up exams with lung specialists, Peggy got the bad news.

“The doctor sat across from me and just kind of pushed the results over to us,” she says. “It was melanoma, on my lungs.

I couldn’t believe it so I pushed the results back across the table to him.”

Peggy says she had no idea melanoma could spread inside the body. “I thought it was just skin cancer. In my case it spread to my lungs.”

Her doctors were able to successfully operate again, removing a small piece of her lung — and again declared her cancer free.

“After all kinds of testing, the pulmonary specialists took out one lobe of my lung,” Peggy says. “Might not sound like much, but I’ve got a scar from my shoulder to my waist.”

Following surgery, she returned to Moffitt Cancer Center in Tampa, Fla., every three months for testing, until 2009.

“We thought I was fine, so I decided to start planning our 50th wedding anniversary with Howard,” she says. “We’d made all sorts of plans — Myrtle Beach and two weeks in Hawaii — and we were so excited.”

But it wasn’t to be. Peggy’s cancer

returned and this time attacked her pancreas, spleen, diaphragm, kidney, hip and liver.

“They told me (and my husband) that I’m full of tumors, and that they’d have to operate,” Peggy says. ““Doctors did surgery after surgery to remove the tumors; after more than a month in the bed, they wanted me to start chemotherapy treatments.”

But she refused, telling doctors she’d had enough. She was tired and worried about the treatment’s side effects.

“After the doctor told me I had threeto-eight months without chemo, though, Howard said, ‘She’ll have it.’”

Three months of intensive therapy left Peggy with little to show for it besides neuropathy, nerve damage resulting from the chemo that leads to loss of sensation, burning and shaking, that hinders coordination.

“The chemo just killed my hands and feet,” Peggy says. “At that point, I made peace with dying.”

Peggy says she was shocked, however, to later learn she was one of 50 eligible patients at five United States hospitals

invited to participate in trial testing of a drug that had just been approved by the Food and Drug Administration to treat late stage melanoma.

She responded to the drug immediately, with her tumors shrinking by more than 50 percent after three months, and even further after six.

“I couldn’t believe it,” she says. “I’d been battling for my life, nothing had worked and here I was responding so well to this drug.”

Now called Yervoy, the drug shrunk or eliminated seven of Peggy’s tumors — a diagnosis that has been confirmed every three months since she finished the drug in 2010.

“I’m told the tumors may be dead,” she says. “I’ve still got a spot above my liver and my left lung which they may have to wind up treating one day, but right now I’m doing good. I get a little itchy every time I go back for my check ups, though.”

And Peggy’s results may have been the best of her trial testing group.

“Even Dr. Jeffrey Weber calls me their poster child,” she says. “I asked if all the trial patients had the same success rate

as I did. Ten had good results, but I think maybe I had the best.”

Now, Peggy says, its time to start thinking about planning that Hawaii vacation that was postponed by her treatments in 2009.

“It’s taken awhile for me to come around to the idea of planning that trip again,” she admits. “The last experience kind of did a number on me as far as planning, and I get a little nervous every time I think about it, but we’re thinking of heading there in 2014.”

Peggy says she wants everyone fighting long odds to stand firm and never give up.

“I shouldn’t be here, but I am,” she says.

“There’s hope out there. People shouldn’t settle down and give up.”

Adam Orr Editor, Ashe Mountain Times adam.orr@mountaintimes.com

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The Magic of Math with Mary Wilbur Retired teacher, Mary Wilbur remembers that as a high school student, many of her classmates did not share her fondness for mathematics.

“When they bemoaned having to take math classes,” she says, “I had to be quiet because algebra, trigonometry, and geometry were all my favorite subjects.”

After graduation, Mary, a New Jersey native, went to Rutgers University where she obtained her bachelor’s degree and took every math course the school offered along the way.

“In my senior year, I took four math courses with all math majors,” she says, “and those were the most interesting class mates for me.”

Actually, she was the only female in a class with 34 males — but she was “mostly interested” in learning.

“My father had thought I should go into teaching,” she says, “but since so many of my friends did not like this subject, I wanted to use my knowledge in business companies that needed people who majored in math.”

Her first job was working in New York City, in the statistical market research department of Singer Industrial Machine Company.

“While it was interesting work,” she says, “after I had been there for about a year, I realized that only men moved up in the company, so I decided to look for another job.”

Her next job was in the engineering department at Federal Telephone and Radio Corporation, doing microwave engineering “for other companies that wanted to communicate between their different locations,” she describes, “using a microwave set-up instead of a regular phone line.”

Mary Wilbur is a retired math teacher who found magic in the numbers.

Photo by Sherrie Norris

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She was one of four women in the department, all college math majors who entered this department as student engineers.

“After a few months, we could advance to a beginning engineer rank and continue on to intermediate engineer — on up to senior engineer — and were paid the same as the men.

She did a job for Kyoto Press in Japan, “whose reporters wanted to send their stories quickly into the main office,” she says.

“Our job was to determine what equipment would be needed, which was then built in the company’s factory and shipped out.”

It was also interesting work, she says, “but when I had been there two years.

FTRC did not have enough new contracts coming in, so they laid off 2,000 people in the factory area and 200 more in the office departments.”

Naturally, she says, all four women in the engineering department were among those laid off. “However, the company did give us two weeks severance pay and two weeks vacation pay, along with our two weeks salary,” she says.

Mary then applied for a job which required “secret clearance” she says, with the FBI researching her background by talking to her high school principal, her college professors, and friends from her hometown. “Since this would take about two weeks, I used my vacation time and went to Montreal, Canada to an engineering conference,” she says.

After receiving clearance, she started working in the Underwater Sound Research Department of Bell Telephone Lab —detecting submarines as they passed hydrophones situated in Long Island Sound.

“It was during this time that I had the opportunity to make the first sound recording of the Nautilus as it left New London, Connecticut and went out to the Atlantic,” she says.

Mary’s primary reason for sharing her story, she says, is to encourage students to realize that mathematics can lead to interesting and exciting work.

“After getting my masters degree,” she says, “I taught mathematics at a community college where college algebra was a required subject. I was sad to find too many students who had forgotten their high school Algebra and it was difficult for them.”

But, she tried her best to make learning fun and used “magic pencils” to enhance the desire of students to learn math.

“Right before final exams at Christmas one year, I bought red pencils and wrapped them in ribbons and told my students that they all had the answers right inside those pencils — all they had to do was shake them out.”

Several years after she started giving the pencils to her students, Mary was on her way across the University of South Florida campus to teach a math class as an adjunct faculty member, when she heard someone calling out her name.

“As I turned to see the person running up to me,” she says, “ I recognized her as one of my former math students. She was now taking classes at USF to get her bachelor’s degree and wanted me to know that she still had her magic pencil and that it was much shorter now, but she saved it for all her math exams. Can you believe it? I didn’t know what to say. “ Mary Wilbur and her husband, Harold, now deceased, decided in the early 1980s, while living in St. Petersburg, Fla., that they wanted a summer home in Boone.

They also decided to build their own home, rather than buy one and be stuck with a mortgage for many years.

As teachers, the couple also agreed that they would not rush into the project, but use their summer vacations to work on their home.

It all sounded good, Mary says, in retrospect, but it took them 10 summers to complete their dream home.

“It’s a story in itself, says Mary, and one that is documented through text and photos in her book, “The Kool Kottage.”

Widowed now for 17 years, Mary continues to spend her summers in the home that love built, filled with many memories to warm her heart of the sacrifices that she and her beloved husband made together.

“I love Boone and have many friends here,” she says. Mary is actively involved at Boone United Methodist Church and stays busy with various causes and community events during her time in the High Country.

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YouGoGirl

Siren’s Call Rising Watauga High School freshman inspired to Perform Eliza Eason is a multi-talented rising freshman at Watauga High School who started singing “the Elmo theme song,” she says, before she could talk. She’s been performing in the public arena since she was 9.

Most recently in late June, Eliza reached a milestone with her stage appearance in Boone at the Siren Mountain Jam, a two-day music and arts festival celebrating the achievements of women.

She shared the spotlight with wellknown female recording artists and festival headliners, calling it “a great experience.”

Eliza has had a lifetime of musical influences, with her family playing a key part in her evolving interests.

It “officially” began, Eliza says, when her mother picked up a guitar at yard sale.

“I asked her what was I going to do with it. She told me that I was going to learn to play it.”

First, it was lessons with Randy Paisley, owner of Blue Moon Guitars in Ashe County and now, she says, she’s learning with Steve Lewis, “one of the greatest around.”

Not only did she learn to play, but she

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also began writing music.

But, guitar’s not enough for the budding entertainer.

“I’m trying to learn to play piano by ear,” she says. “I really want to play “Let it Be” by the Beatles. I love the Beatles My parents raised me on the Beatles — I was singing Lady Madonna when I was six.”

Eliza counts John Lennon, especially, as one of her greatest musical inspirations, along with Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin and Elton John. “I’m not big on this new stuff,” she says.

“But I love the classics — that’s the gold that lays beneath the surface.”

In addition to the “gold,” Eliza enjoys “some alternative rock, too,” she says, “The stuff that people don’t listen to much anymore.”

Along with discovering her niche with the guitar, Eliza started writing poetry in school, which progressed into songwriting.

She credits Cody Reed, her language arts/English teacher at Parkway Elemen-

tary School, for encouraging her.

“He taught me how to create poetry and to make it my own,” she says. “He really inspired me to write what was on my mind — and helped me realize that I had excellent observation skills, I began really noticing what’s going on around me and writing about it.”

She currently has a “huge notebook filled with poems,” she says, “that I can turn into songs at any time.”

Eliza says she desires to record one major single: “Something that will be famous around the world and that people will be listening to for many years, like the Beatles had. I want at least one hit that will be a good favorite for generations.”

She might be on her way to making that happen.

“I will soon will be recording my demo CD with Steve Lewis, for which I have a few songs already written,” she says.

She has received great encouragement to do the CD in hopes of jumpstarting a

‘My goal is not money, or fame – just inspiration.’

A multi-talented rising freshman at Watauga High School, Eliza Eason plans to pursue a career in performing arts.

Photos submitted

music career, she says.

Eliza loves “going on YouTube,” she says, “and seeing Bob Dylan’s early work and then think about how far he’s gone — how big he’s gotten.”

She wants to be like that, she says, “to write really amazing songs that are known all around the world.”

As she has been inspired, she wants to do the same for others.

“My goal is not money, or fame – just inspiration,” she says with conviction. “I have a bunch of videos on Facebook and I hear from people all the time who like what they see. That’s really cool. When I grow older, I’d like to spread wisdom and good things to people younger than I am, so they can grow up to be awesome and to inspire someone else.”

Eliza exudes insight and maturity beyond her age in many situations and is comfortable in most any setting — whether performing at Booedocks, Woodlands or the Siren Mountain Jam. For several years before moving on to larger venues, Eliza was a “regular” at Shooting Stars and performed as part of The Spring Showcase. She has loved her experiences with three Broadway camps

with David Chernault “from Disney,” she says, another of which she was anticipating at press-time, called Next Generation Kids.

“We learn a bunch of musical numbers and then perform at the end of the week, “ she says. “It’s really amazing how he, David, can transform kids to do wonderful things in a week’s time.”

The acting classes have helped her in many ways, she admits.

“I love Broadway — and acting,” she says, and it’s obvious through her roles in local theatre. “I played Ursula recently in the Little Mermaid, a Parkway Production at the Harvest House with Sondra Edwards, who has also really helped me become the actress that I am.”

While her long-range plans include singing — “and doing my own thing,” she says, Eliza hopes to focus on a mixture of the arts in high school, including (advanced) drama and chorus.

“I’m really excited about being in the Playmakers,” she says. “I want to pursue the theatrical opportunities that it will give me, but I will wait until college to pursue my musical career.”

She hopes to study musical arts in

Asheville following high school.

No stranger to disappointments, Eliza says, “You’ve got to get knocked down a couple of times along the way, but usually when you get back up, there’s something better waiting.”

We are anxious to see the great things waiting on the horizon for this gifted teen.

The daughter of Greg and Heidi Eason, Eliza says she is “an artsy child,” who also loves to paint and draw. She says her father’s poetry, “some really great stuff,” has also inspired her over the years.

“I have really awesome parents,” she says. ““My mom has always been there, too, and has helped me along the way – she does everything for me.”

Her uncle, Jeff Eason, has also encouraged her talent and has accompanied her during several of her stage performances.

Remember the name, Eliza Eason.

Chances are, you will be hearing it for a long time to come. sherrie norris Editor, All About Women

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

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days’. e good old arolyn in ‘th C y ar M d ft, an Catherinee, le

Celebrating

Catherine Bare , left, enjoys a clo se relationship McLean. Photos with her sister, submitted.

Mary Carolyn

Sisterhood Rows of beans seemed to stretch on forever as my sister and I pulled weeds in the hot sun, occasionally slapping at gnats. We worked silently, straining to hear the weak, tinny music from a plastic transistor radio we had propped up with clods of dirt among the weeds at the end of the garden.

We listened to the “Theme from a Summer Place,” keeping our faces turned from each other to hide our dreamy looks of hoped-for future love. The lyrics to “Itsy Bitsy, Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini” caused us to imagine ourselves dashing into ocean waves we’d never seen.

Our mountain home in Foscoe was far from the seashore and a “vacation” for us was climbing into Daddy’s station wagon to go on a day trip to the “Singing on the Mountain” or to a church homecoming and dinner on the grounds.

My sister loved to sing along with “Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor on the Bedpost Over Night?” I thought that was disgusting, but didn’t dare say so. A few years older than me, she was just liable to chase me out of the garden and plant a gob of gum right onto my face.

In our home, we called the noon meal “dinner” and when we got hot, tired and hungry enough, we stopped to eat. We made a feast of corn-on-the-cob and tommy-toes, and fresh milk Mama had gotten

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from the cow before going to work that morning. When my sister had finished boiling the golden ears of corn, we slathered them with butter — churned the night before — and carried them, the tomatoes and a salt shaker to our wide side porch, letting the screen door slam since no one else was home to tell us not to.

In the cool shade, swinging our legs over the edge of the porch, butter dripping from our chins, our food seemed as good as we would ever enjoy.

My sister was the coolest person I knew in those years. Where I was shy and awkward, she seemed, even as a young girl, to be at ease talking with others. She had lots of friends her own age and I was sometimes jealous when they went off down Church Road riding their bicycles and telling teen-age secrets, while I was left to play with dolls.

Sometimes my hurt feelings — or her general irritation with a younger sister who was always pestering for attention — erupted into a fierce argument. One or the other of us would stand on our side of the large bedroom we shared and yell, “Don’t even think of stepping over this line!”

Furious and red-faced, we’d point to an elaborate construction of belts, sashes and scarves placed between our beds to mark the dividing line.

Then, just as quickly, we would scurry to clean up the items separating our space

and run to sit together on the floor in front of the TV and watch an episode of “The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis.”

Without noticing, we outgrew the trivial side of youth. We didn’t take note of the last time we fashioned a see-saw over the edge of the porch or when we grew embarrassed to stand in the yard belting out every verse we could recall of the centuriesold ballad, “Barbara Allen.”

We gave up wearing matching pedal pushers and sweater and skirt sets, and never looked back. It was time to leave such childishness behind.

With excited anticipation we moved into the rest of our lives. I served as a bridesmaid and she later as a matron of honor in our respective weddings. Children were born. Our beloved Daddy passed away unexpectedly at age 53. More children were born and we were brokenhearted they would never see Dad’s smile or feel his strong, calloused hand pat their little heads.

During the decades, we experienced the loss of our mother, an aunt who was like a mother, and other family members.

And we enjoyed blessings as spouses, children and grandchildren were added.

Both sadness and joy brought strength to us.

A few years ago, I had a planned surgery. I didn’t want to be a bother so I told my sister, “Don’t come. I will be fine.” I

knew she would insist on sitting with me while letting her own responsibilities go. I would feel guilty. After all, I was all grown up, now and could handle anything on my own.

But, she was there before I went into surgery. She was there when I woke up.

And bright and early the next morning there she was, bringing a basket full of comfort — lotions to rub my feet, a pretty comb for my hair and snacks for when I felt like eating.

All day, she plumped my pillow at my request. Her foot massages were ecstasy.

Whenever I roused from the daze of medications, I knew I was safe and loved.

There have been trials over the years.

Time has tempered many of them into memories that strengthen us. Just a glance between us may bring a smile as we remember dancing around Mama’s cook stove, teasing one another while we washed the supper dishes. We may share a burst of laughter as we remember helping our mother dust her dozens of lamps, and promising ourselves we would have an “ugly lamp sale” when she was gone. That thought, of course, is quickly followed by shared tears as we think how that old joke is not funny anymore.

Being sisters weaves a beautiful fabric that defines who we are with all our snags and wrinkles. When my sister left the hospital late that afternoon, I watched her step into the hallway — and wished she would stay.

Catherine Bare

SAVE THE DATE

Local writer who enjoys writing about family, friends, relationships and earlier days of life in the High Country.

National Sisters Day, Sunday, August 4, is your chance (if you have a sister, that is) to show your appreciation for that special family relationship. All siblings have the odd argument here and there, but deep down there’s little way around the natural bond of siblings.

Make this day a special celebration for your sister, by however you feel is best.

If you don’t have a sister, you can still celebrate the friendships of sisterhood by having a girl’s night out.

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A close bond has been formed through The Haven. Back row, standing, left to right: Erin Clark, Deanna Drum, Grace McLaurin, Todd Hinceman, Jean Paspa, Gina Humphries, Monica Hemmen, Lynsey Frey, Lynn Brady, Lori Winstead, Lynn Price and Tina Brown. Front row, l-r: Jo Ann Orr, Kathy Wheeler, (founder of Through Healing Eyes), Katheryn Harlan, and Dianna Lee. Photo submitted

T

HE HAVEN

A Place For Healing

Thanks to a serendipitous meeting between two dedicated North Carolina women, Boone area breast cancer patients now have special access to valuable natural healing treatments.

Dianna Lee, a licensed massage therapist, also certified in manual lymph therapy, has created The Haven, which will be funded by a grant from the nonprofit, Through Healing Eyes.

In 2003, Katheryn Harlan, THE’s

founder, was diagnosed with breast cancer by her husband, a radiologist, after her annual mammogram.

A healthy mother of three who ran and biked competitively, she was shocked by the news, but relieved that her cancer had been detected at an early stage.

Katheryn successfully completed cancer treatment, and was able to fully regain her active lifestyle. Realizing that many breast cancer patients were not so fortunate, she decided to do something to sup-

The Haven, offered at Boone Healing Arts Center on State Farm Rd in Boone, is open to anyone who is diagnosed with breast cancer during the time they are in treatment. Patients can choose six complementary sessions, in any order, from either Dianna Lee or Jo Ann Orr. To enroll in the program and make an appointment, call 828-386-1172. For more information, go to healing-therapy.org or BHACboone.com

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

By Louise Obrien

port other women fighting the disease.

She and a photographer friend, Sally Fanjoy, teamed up to document cancer survivors’ journeys through treatment and recovery. To raise money for local patients with limited resources, they packaged the individual photographs and stories of courage into an inspirational calendar, and named their nonprofit venture Through Healing Eyes (throughhealingeyes.org).

Dianna Lee moved to Boone from Asheville three years ago; she practices out of the Boone Healing Arts Center and Chetola resort in Blowing Rock.

In addition to massage and manual lymph therapy, Dianna is certified in craniosacral therapy and is a licensed esthetician. Dianna has practiced hands-on

modalities for 30 years, 15 of those in a physical therapy setting assisting with the care of patients — including those with cancer.

When she met Katheryn Harlan, and learned the inspirational story behind THE, Dianna wanted to get involved.

She knew her skills could provide both physical and emotional benefit to the breast cancer community and that the stress of cancer diagnosis and treatment invariably requires the body to “re-set itself.”

Modalities such as therapeutic massage, craniosacral therapy, cupping, facials and other skin care can help heal scar tissue, rejuvenate the skin and expose the patient to the healing effects of touch.

One of the most common side-effects of breast surgery and radiation is lymphedema—a condition in which lymph fluid backs up into body tissues. Manual lymph therapy uses light touch to move this excess fluid out of the tissues and back into lymphatic vessels. One patient said, “My lumpectomy left me with limited mobility, and a considerable amount of scar tissue.

But after just a single session with Dianna, I noticed improvement in my range of motion.”

Dianna combined these services into “The Haven” and applied for a grant through THE, which has been funding a similar program in Hickory since 2010.

The Vital Touch program at Hickory’s Vitality Anti-Aging Center has provided more than 50 cancer patients with massage, medical cupping, acupuncture and facials — completely free of charge.

Across the hall from Dianna at the Boone Healing Arts Center, is the office of Jo Ann Orr, a licensed clinical social worker for 26-plus years, and a member of the National Association of Social Workers.

As a body-centered and biofeedback therapist, Jo Ann, in her therapy, combines expressive arts, experiential activities, somatic awareness and mindfulness.

With specialties in childhood trauma, anxiety, depression, relationship/personal growth, and illness and physical pain, Jo’s advanced training is ideally suited to helping with the trauma of cancer diagnosis and treatment.

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Fundraiser Saturday, August 24 at harvest house To thank supporters, and raise awareness in the Boone community, The Haven will be holding a fundraiser Saturday, August 24 at The Harvest House, next to Bare Essentials Natural Market on Boone Heights Drive. Providers of natural health products and services will set up informational booths and offer complimentary services and products starting at 4 p.m. Katheryn Harlan, founder of THE, will offer a relaxing yoga class at 5 p.m.

The highlight of the event will be a performance by Grammy-nominated guitarist Melissa Reaves and her band from 6 to 8 p.m. A special thank you to Bare Essential Health Food Store for all their contributions and support.

The women behind the scenes at Appalachian BrianEstates, left to right: Linda Rook, Ursula Michael, Donna Tester, Emily Sheffield, Nancy Dennett, Jackie Roberts, Pat Taylor, Nance Lane. Photo by Yogi Collins

Appalachian Brian Estates A Great Place for the Golden Years As a kid, I thought that after finding your partner in life everything else was just easy. Transitions, decisions — and life — would just fall into place after that hurdle. Admittedly, it was incredibly naïve; life is full of transitions, many of which leave us feeling vulnerable.

It only makes sense, that as senior citizens transition to independent living to places like Appalachian Brian Estates, the High Country’s only rental retirement community, they approach it with apprehension.

However, says ABE resident services and marketing director, Pat Taylor, the worry is short-lived.

“There’s such a hesitation coming in because you’re the new kid on the block,”

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

she says, “but it takes about two weeks before new residents settle in. After a month or so they usually admit they wish they had made the move sooner.”

And why wouldn’t they? As an independent living community with 90 apartments, ABE allows as much autonomy as a resident desires.

Rent includes housekeeping services,

two prepared meals a day plus continental breakfast, around-the-clock coffee, hot chocolate and cereal, as well as transportation to scheduled events and locations around the High Country — and last, but certainly not least, the worry-free living that only renting a place (rather than owning) affords.

Pets are welcome and while the apartments all feature a fireplace and kitchenette, the facility itself boasts a full-service hair salon, a billiards room, a sundries store and plenty of activities. This place sounds more like a destination vacation.

With residents over the age of 100 — and with an average resident age of 87 — this great lifestyle apparently works for the ABE clients.

“When you talk to people here who

have reached 100,” Taylor says, “they’ll tell you that this lifestyle has enhanced their longevity. They don’t have to worry about cooking or overflowing toilets; they can just call us. Their fears are relieved. It’s just such a relief for everyone, including their adult children.”

Not only do the adult children of residents appreciate ABE and all it offers their family members, but often later choose to become residents themselves. That kind of endorsement, says Taylor, is largely attributable to the dedicated ABE staff.

“If you ask the residents and their adult children, the number one thing they love about Appalachian Brian Estates is the staff,” she says. “They are a genuinely caring group of employees and give 110 percent to the residents because we all enjoy working here and working for the people living here.”

Loving their work translates into career longevity, too, with many of the staff having worked at ABE for more than 20 years. Nance Lane, business and operations director, is in her 26th year at ABE and counts the decision to close her suc-

cessful housecleaning business to join the staff full-time as one of her best. “I’ve been rewarded for that decision,” she says.

“I get emotional when I talk about it because it’s my life. God blessed me with all these grandparents when I didn’t have any to fall on. We have spoiled our folks here rotten, and we love every minute of it. And they love every minute of it, too,” she says with a chuckle.

Appalachian Brian Estates offers a variety of short- and long-term rental options. For more information or for a tour of the facility, call Pat Taylor at (828) 2641006. Appalachian Brian Estates is located at 163 Shadowline Drive in Boone, NC.

offering: housekeeping services prepared meals around-the-clock coffee, hot chocolate and cereal transportation to scheduled events and locations around the High Country full-service hair salon a billiards room a sundries store plenty of activities

Yozette ‘Yogi’ Collins Mom, television producer/writer, and obsessive internet researcher. Though her name suggests otherwise, she is not (yet) an actual yogi.

Pets are welcome All apartments feature a fireplace and kitchenette

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Reaching Greater Heights with Amy Justice Amy Justice of Boone has spent much of her summer helping youngsters gain confidence by walking the high ropes through an outdoor summer camp. Her seasonal work with Blue Ridge Learning Centers is just one example of how she has spent her lifetime helping others reach greater heights.

The adventures for Amy and her husband, Blake, both long-time educators, are really just beginning as the couple and their three daughters move to Germany later this month where they all will embark on a new phase of life.

Through TeachBeyond, a “transformational education opportunity,” she describes, Amy and Blake will be stationed at the Black Forest Academy in Kandern, Germany where they will be teaching about 280 children of missionary parents who are serving in more than 50 countries Amy will also be leading teacher workshops in the Central African Republic and the Democratic Republic of the Congo.

Photo by Sherrie Norris

Amy and her family are excited about supporting the ministries of so many different families and witnessing and sharing in God’s work around the world.

“The legacy we hope to leave with our children, as well as our church, is that God can and will use you, with all your gifts as well as your faults and scars, if you allow him,” she says. “We also hope to offer courage to our children and church to step out in faith when they feel a call — or stand and face whatever they fear. There is great peace in the shadow of God’s wing.”

Among the “practical challenges,” she anticipates, include finding a “new rhythm” to their everyday life and maintaining the balance between family and ministry. “It will also be hard to teach, nurture and disciple the kids at BFA — without overstepping our bounds,” Amy says.

Amy and her family have made a twoyear commitment of service but, she says, “We are open to staying longer if the Lord wants us there.”

As a “seasoned educator, counselor and facilitator,” Amy has 18 eighteen years of experience in student service roles and teaching in higher education and Christian education.

Among her strengths, she says, are teaching with experiential methods, visioning, collaboration and creativity.

For the last two years, Amy has contracted her services through Blue Ridge Learning Centers of Boone, to help plan and facilitate educational retreats and events for schools, business leaders and church groups. She has especially enjoyed programs on teambuilding, managing transitions, communication and leadership development.

As her cover photo depicts, she loves the opportunity to provide experiential learning opportunities utilizing outdoor challenge courses “and other experiential learning initiatives.”

“I only began working on the high ropes course two years ago,” she says.” As my family enters into this new chapter of our lives in international missions, I constantly think about how I conquered my fear, self-doubt and self-consciousness on the ropes course at age 42.”

She jokingly calls it her mid-life crisis.

“But, in all honesty, it allows me to draw parallels, offer myself grace, and find peace in the face of doing something kind of crazy with our lives, she says.”

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Amy Justice and her husband Blake, daughters, Molly, Heather and Gracie, are leaving Boone this month for extended mission work in Germany. Photo submitted

Grace is a big word for Amy. “If I were to write a biography, it would be about grace, not so much for my ability to live with it, although that’s a goal, but because of what I’ve been given,” she says. “I mess up more than I get it right, but because I know God created me and is using everything for good, I can keep going.”

Also, she says, because so many people have shown grace to her, she wants to offer grace to others.

She shares an example of that grace through the life of her great aunt Martha, now 90, who always had a huge garden and was known for giving out vegetables all over her community.

“To this day, from her 8 feet x 8 feet patch in her retirement community, she is still giving vegetables to her neighbors,” Amy says. “Grace comes my way as plentiful as the zucchini from the summer garden. The more I give away, the more I have — so the more I give. I think that’s why Aunt Martha keeps giving.”

What does this have to do with education? Amy sees grace as paramount to teaching and learning, no matter what you believe, spiritually.

“As teachers, we must know how to offer grace to students in order to help them move forward in their learning,” she says.

“Being a student of life, we have to give ourselves and others grace in order to keep growing emotionally and spiritually.”

That’s just one reason she loves experiential education.

“Sometimes you can’t put your finger on what is holding you back, or you see a hurdle that is too great to overcome, “ she says. “ When I teach, I try to use something that gets people thinking about a different problem or challenge, something they can find success at doing, and then use it to draw parallels to what can help them in their ‘real’ situation.”

Often times doing something fun and physical, she says, gets people far enough away from what is internally holding them back to evaluate and find a solution to their own challenges in a non-threatening way.

It’s a method that she uses regularly in the classroom, in retreats and often in her own life.

“I have an awesome family that also provides a great deal of grace and it’s like a personal education lab,” she says. “I feel better about my skills as an educator than my skills as a wife and mother on most days, but I try to use what I know about personal growth — at 50 feet in the air — to guide me at home.”

As an educator, Amy says her first responsibility is to keep growing, herself.

“I think we can benefit from having this commitment with our loved ones, as well.

I still have such a long way to go.”

Married for almost 18 years, she calls Blake her best friend and cheerleader. “We

will tell anyone who will listen that our secret to a strong marriage is giving one another grace,” she says. “We have three fabulous daughters —Gracie, Heather and Molly, who bring us all kinds of joy.

Having shared in the parenting journey “with many people through the years,” Amy says, she believes that grace is the key there, too — “giving it to ourselves as well as to our kids.”

Being able to say, “I’m sorry, please forgive me, and how can I make it right” is hard, she says, “but vital.”

Even her family’s upcoming journey, she says, is because of grace. “We don’t have tons of financial prosperity, (we are educators, after all), but we have been blessed to be a blessing, as we are prosperous in spirit, education, compassion and courage.”

Amy says they are not afraid of the unknown that lies before them, but are going into mission work humbly —“because we are far from perfect and we know there are unpredictable challenges ahead.”

Amy says that God has prepared her family “with exposure to all sorts of teaching environments, people, travel and climbing our own personal hurdles.”

“We know this journey won’t just be another day in the classroom,” she says, “but we have come to know that where we are weak, God is strong, and graceful through us.”

Amy was born in Athens, Ohio, and later moved to Winston-Salem where she lived with her parents, Bill and Karen, and brother, Todd, until coming to Appalachian State University for college.

“I grew up in a family who modeled faith in God and in a tradition of education and generosity of spirit,” she says.

“Blake and I met in grad school at a Bible study and we were married in 1995.”

Amy majored in advertising, but during her senior year, she changed her focus to college student affairs.

“I had such a great time in college that I didn’t want it to end — ever,” she says. After a year working for “a big ad firm,” she “scurried back to ASU,” she says, for her master’s degree in college student development and counseling, and later for work, in various positions through the years.

Amy was always active in campus ministries, she says, participating in InterVarsity Christian Fellowship, leading Bible studies and a college ministry at a church.

“I have always valued quietly incorporating my faith and trying to model a life of love in my work with students, whether at a public or private institution,” she says.

Having also taught at Mars Hill College, UNC-Asheville and La Roche College in Pennsylvania, Amy says her “home and first love will always be Appalachian.”

Amy has also taught adult Christian education, marriage enrichment courses, parenting classes and vacation bible school at various churches where she and her family have attended.

As a busy wife and mother, she has also volunteered in her children’s schools, has been a Daisy Girl Scout Troop Leader and has done parenting education at a pregnancy center

Married for almost 18 years, she calls Blake her best friend and cheerleader. ‘We will tell anyone who will listen that our secret to a strong marriage is giving one another grace,’ she says.

Amy says she is “blessed, challenged and thrilled” by watching her “three amazing daughters grow into lovely young women who love God.” Gracie is 13, Heather just turned 11 and Molly is 8.

“I am so proud of the way they fearlessly shine Christ’s love to so many.”

Five years ago, Amy and her family moved to Pennsylvania where Blake obtained his doctorate degree.

“I thought our life in the world of higher education, with some ‘ministry work on the side,’ was all sealed up,” she says.

“Then God began stirring our hearts, reshaping our priorities and we awoke to God’s invitation to take the grace and we had been given, mix it with our experience and gifts and commit to full-time service in Christian Education.”

That’s when they discovered TeachBeyond and learned of its projects that cover the breadth of the passions of their hearts, she says — from working with kids to supporting and encouraging Christian workers and expanding educational opportunities around the globe.

“We discovered many opportunities and needs abroad, but we had a special heart for helping kids and communities who have ‘head knowledge’ of God, but may not have experienced the ‘heart knowledge’ of walking in the peace and fulfillment of God’s abundant love for us,” she says.

Also drawn to help in areas where education can provide hope, Amy says, she will also be serving on the Global University Development team of TeachBeyond to help with some projects improving higher education opportunities in central Africa.

Amy credit close friends, Eric and Tracy Lubsen, missionaries from Boone, who, she says, “went before us, showing us that ‘crazy’ wasn’t so crazy.

“We have also been part of some great local faith families at Boone United Methodist and First Baptist Boone, where we found encouragement and opportunities to serve and stretch our ‘ministry wings,’” she says.

“We have a strong “sending” community, from the value placed on service learning at ASU to the commitment of our churches to serve the community and beyond,” Amy says. “This is what I will miss most about Boone. You just don’t find that everywhere. We hope we can be another model for anyone who is seeking the courage to do something that takes sacrifice and may seem beyond themselves. I can’t begin to describe the joy, peace and fulfillment I have already experienced just in the beginnings of this journey, and I wish that for everyone I meet.”

To keep track of Amy’s new adventure, find her on Facebook at Justice Family with TeachBeyond.

sherrie norris Editor, All About Women

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youngatheart

Heather Brandon never takes a trip without her Kindle Fire. Photo submitted

My gadgets and Me,

A Love Story 30

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

“What have you got in this thing,” asked Roger as he struggled to lift my suitcase into the trunk of his car. “Rocks? It weighs a ton.”

“Books,” I answered with a shrug.

I am always involved with some book or another; not even on vacation was I willing to be separated from my reading materials. I stuffed volumes into every space in my suitcase not already filled with clothing, shoes and other necessities.

The FFA’s baggage weight restrictions put an end to my stuffing-suitcases-with-books ways. After a few close calls, where my bag barely snuck in under the 50-pound limit, I knew I had to find another solution. That solution was to instead stuff books into my carry-on. It was a pain in the neck, literally. Shifting the heavy bag from shoulder to aching shoulder and walk-

ing somewhat lopsided under the weight, my library and I would finally reach our destination.

On a side note, books are to me as music is to Roger, and he insisted on travelling with a collection of favorite CDs and his portable CD player before iPods came along.

I purchased an iPod soon after they came on the market, recognizing that they would revolutionize music listening.

Roger insisted that he did not want one, because to his ears, CDs sounded better.

He changed his mind once he realized that he could travel with his entire music library on one tiny device.

About the time that airlines began enforcing those pesky baggage weight restrictions, eBook readers, Kindles and Nooks appeared on the market. I (and my neck, shoulders and aching back) was excited at the prospect of having that lightweight device filled with a collection of engrossing tales, but I was also hesitant. Just like Roger with his CDs, I was convinced that I liked real books better.

I like the feel of holding a book in my

hands, turning page after page in anticipation of a story’s conclusion, and most importantly, I like free books from the library.

I questioned the expense of purchasing eBooks and whether said lightweight device would evoke the same feelings as clasping a well-loved tome.

And, so, my internal debate continued until Roger took the decision out of my hands by presenting me with a shiny, new Kindle Fire as an anniversary gift. It was love at first sight!

My hesitations faded away as I got to know my Kindle Fire. Books, magazines, Internet access, apps, Angry Birds — it had it all. To my delight, I discovered that my primary qualm, the cost of eBooks, was unwarranted. There are online libraries! I was excited, no giddy, and I might have done a little happy dance.

I can count on one hand the gadgets that have evoked a similar response — the above-mentioned iPods, DVRs and rice cookers. Just as iPods revolutionized music listening, DVRs transformed television viewing. At the risk of sounding like a paid spokeswoman, I can’t imagine life

without my DVR because it lets me be in control of my television viewing and not the other way around.

And, as for my rice cooker, I might go so far as to say that it has forever altered the cooking of rice. Pour in rice, add water, press start and you get perfect rice every time.

Isn’t that what we all want – gadgets that make our lives easier? That’s what my Kindle Fire has done. It hasn’t replaced real books — they will always have a place in my life, but that place is now at home.

During the year that my Kindle Fire and I have been together, we’ve taken road trips and plane trips, visited family and vacationed in faraway places. If you are struggling with the decision as to whether you should get an eBook reader of your own, I say go ahead. I promise that it will be a weight off your shoulders. heather brandon Considers life to be one big anthropological field experience. She observes and reports.

She enjoys travel, food and wine and adventures with her husband, Roger.

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

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Are you an ‘approval junkie?’

Your addiction has roots

healthylady As children, we seek approval from our parents. A sensitive parent will use that disposition wisely and will set reasonable rules. When those rules are violated, those parents will help a child to see the consequences, without rejecting or shaming them.

An insensitive parent, teacher or peer will use invalidation as a means of controlling behavior. Comparing the child to others, ridiculing them or pushing them away causes deep emotional pain. The child no longer feels safe and protected. This creates a cascade of anxiety and fear. The only remedy for stopping the pain is to get back in the ‘good graces’ of the parent, teacher or peer.

If this child was you, then your brain became hardwired to seek approval for comfort. Whenever you don’t receive approval, pain is triggered. The only thing that stops the pain is approval or validation from others. You physically become addicted to approval. You acquiesce to beliefs you don’t embrace and do things you don’t feel comfortable with, just to get the ‘atta girl’ from others.

Some clues that you have an approval addiction: • You are careful about expressing an opinion for fear that someone might be offended by it.

• You can’t say “No.” • If you don’t jump through hoops, you will be rejected.

• You consider yourself good or bad according to what people say about you.

• You tend to lose your identity and absorb the flavor of everyone around you.

• You barter away your time, money, energy and personal preferences to make others happy.

• You rate your behavior after a social situation. (Did I say the right thing? Was I wearing the right clothes? Did I project the right image?) If you did, you feel great. If you did not, you feel insecure and anxious.

Three steps to break the addiction:

1 Face the hard realities.

• Not everyone is going to like you no matter how hard you try. Often the harder you try, the more they will dislike you.

• Even those who genuinely love you are not going to like what you do or say all the time. That does not mean that their love for you will stop.

• If you are being considerate of others, but living authentically — and others don’t like you for it, that is their problem, not yours.

2 Decide what is important to you — and live accordingly.

There are many people in our lives who embrace different ideas on how things should be done. There is no way to please them all. Become a receptive listener to ideas on how to live the life you want to live, but decide for yourself what is important to you. Ask yourself: What clothing style do I like? How do I want to spend my time and money? With whom do I want to surround myself? What beliefs and ideas are important to me? Live life on your terms.

rather than risk rejection. They smile and nod as though they are in agreement with the opinions being expressed.

To break the addiction, you must be willing to voice your true thoughts. Remember, if someone accepts you only because you agree with everything they say, they are not your friends. They are merely your pusher, doling out your drug of choice — approval.

By being tactful, but honest, you will cull out those who are not truly your friends and develop a circle of friends who really care about you for who you are.

The fruit of taking action The brain has the ability to restructure and heal itself throughout life. This ability is known as neuroplasticity. Resisting the habit of doing (or not do) things out of fear of rejection will eventually cause it to lose its grip. You will hard-wire a different emotional response. You will no longer have to get your fix of “approval from others.” You will begin to “feel satisfied” when you live consistently with your values and beliefs.

You might need counseling or lifecoaching to help you get truly free, but it is worth it. The fruit of breaking the addiction is sweet. Friendships will be more genuine. Life will be lived more authentically.

RECCOMMENDED READING: For further details on about neuroplasticity and strategies for changing unhealthy behaviors, read “You Are Not Your Brain,”

by Jeffrey M. Schwartz and Rebecca Gladding MD (Jun 5, 2012) DISCLAIMER: Please seek the advice of a medical professional for diagnosis and treatment requiring medical intervention.

3 Be “straight up” about how you feel about matters.

Approval addicts often remain silent

bonnie church Certified Life and Wellness Coach Author/ columist, motivational speaker Certified Trainer for TLS Weight Loss Solution

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

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mom’sworld

The Backpack Necessities for Success in School

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Before I discovered the wonders of Goodwill and Salvation Army, “back to school” necessitated a gleeful trip to the mall with my mother to try to find some affordable way of dressing “cool” and not alienating myself from all kids committed to identifying the latest trends in tween-wear.

Of course, this pre-dated Hannah Montana, leopard skin print, denim mini-skirts for girls age 4 and up, and Aeropostole. I remember the first kids who had the Members Only jackets, not to mention Gloria Vanderbilt jeans and leg warmers.

My attire was typically “Hunt Club” (JCPenney brand name) or some other “no-name” brand, although there were the prized Guess jeans that I wore until they eventually fell apart beyond recognition.

Once the clothes were acquired, notebooks and binders were next. Despite the fact that three-ring binders will never go out of style, when the “trapper” arrived, complete with velcro and extra pockets, school supplies entered a whole new dimension of spending. Functional was not good enough; there had to be sports logos and rainbows and sometimes some iridescent abstract designs.

Nowadays, school supplies can cost a small fortune.

While tape and crayons are pennies, not too long ago, I can remember seeing a contemporary version of the “trapper” that cost almost $20. For a folder.

Finally, in order to transport all of your stuff, you had to scout out the latest backpack. Now, here’s where I truly wonder if we will enter into the obsolete zone.

With iPads, tablets, cellphones, and electronics, it is no surprise that what is carried currently in the backpack will likely become less and less.

Heavy textbooks can be purchased in an electronic format, and many teachers pull material from the web. I sometimes wonder if books themselves will continue to be a part of the classroom at all with Kindles, Nooks, and White Boards so prominent in the school setting.

While I cannot complain about accessibility of material, or the considerable weight differential, I still do not question the superiority of a book in hand, in the reading and learning experience.

Flipping pages back and forth, earmarking or marking pages with the random piece of paper that presents itself, highlighting (highlighting and more highlighting), and annotating in the margins of a poem that speaks to you — all of these things bring life to the words in a way that the sterility of a tablet cannot.

There is something magnificent about a good book that pulls you in, sinks you into that Lazy Boy chair and beckons your mind to expand beyond your home and classroom into

the world and even the universe.

I, like anyone else, can find myself surfing the web for hours, wallowing in the magnitude of information that goes endlessly onward — and feeling guilty for time that seems wasted, even if perhaps it is not.

There is gluttony in electronic media and the web in that one can flash between screens at whim, choosing to follow a path or not, based upon if the next link tantalizes you enough.

But, when you read a book, there is a sense of commitment that you will follow the path that the author has laid out for you. If you are bored, the book is put down; however, if you are hooked, the book carries you into its world without escape.

Recently, my son returned from a summer program heavily focused on reading and writing. While some kids would run far from such a demanding class, his love of reading made this a stimulating and rewarding experience.

The book list for the class was impressive and included six or eight books, many of which were 400-plus pages, for a three-week course.

While away in Texas, he was visited by his uncle who took him to a Barnes and Noble bookstore. Consequently, the load he had coming home was quite a bit heavier than when leaving. Checking his luggage was imperative, since lifting his bag with 30 - 40 pounds of books in it was unrealistic.

He arrived home late one night while I was at the hospital, so our first real conversation was the next morning, at which time he asked if I had had a chance to peruse his new collection.

We looked at some of the books and talked. He was proud of these new acquisitions, and it showed. I recalled many of the great literature courses I had taken in college and admitted some jealousy at his experience.

Perhaps, it is this ability to share in a tangible way that makes the heavier backpack worth it, as we relate with others in our world. I hope that as the technology age continues to unfold, teachers, students, and parents have perspective.

When it comes right down to it, cool clothes and $20 folders do very little for our learning. The web opens doors, but it can also tempt us to expect rapid-fire images and ideas for minds that can become lazier and lazier.

But, books — books engage the mind, invite discussion and evoke potential. And that’s what school should be preparing us for. heather jordan, CNM, MSN Comments or questions?

828.737.7711, ext. 253 landh@localnet.com

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

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Keisha Wilson

Former Miss Ashe County attributes success to pageant experience, God’s guidance and family support

Photo submitted

A 2008 graduate of Ashe County High School, 22-year-old Keisha Wilson has achieved numerous goals and received countless opportunities that she never dreamed would be possible.

Keisha, who grew up in Ashe County in the Creston community, most recently competed in the Miss Tennessee pageant for the third time.

“It’s hard to put into words how remarkably blessed I was to get to go and compete in Miss Tennessee,” Keisha says.

“Where I grew up and was raised, there wasn’t a lot of opportunity around here. So, moving and stepping out on my own and having enough confidence to do something like that was a big deal.”

Keisha said she got to meet so many people with high goals and ambitions through the pageant. “It makes you want to become the best person you can be,” she says.

Keisha’s pageant participation began when she was 12-years-old.

It’s something she decided to do to start gaining scholarships for college.

As a freshman at ACHS, she was named Miss Ashe County, which she says opened the first door of opportunity for her.

Keisha was ecstatic to win the pageant. “I was the youngest one and the only one with braces,” she says.

When Keisha neared high school graduation she realized that competing in pageants could help pay for her entire college education.

She moved to Tennessee to attend East Tennessee State University and continued to participate in pageants in her new state of residence.

She captured multiple titles, including Miss Johnson City, Miss Capital City and Miss Bristol. Those three titles allowed her to compete in three Miss Tennessee pageants.

Although she didn’t win the state title, her win as Miss Johnson City led her to the job she has now at the Johnson City Wellness Center.

“I’ve been working there for the past

three years,” she says. “It has been a great part-time job while I’ve been in college and I’ve gotten to meet hundreds of people because of that job.”

In May, Keisha graduated from ETSU with a bachelor’s degree. She majored in allied health with a concentration in cardiopulmonary science.

Her recent Miss Tennessee competition was the final pageant for Wilson and she says, “I feel like that door is closed now.

“The biggest thing I was able to realize after the last competition is that God gives

board testings she has to do. Once she gains that certification, she wants to begin working as a respiratory therapist.

“That’s my next step, but I’m not going to limit myself,” she says. “I have a heart and passion for travel and I believe God has placed a great opportunity in my life. I want to share my experiences with people wherever I go.”

Wilson just recently became a regional director for a nutritional company known as Visalus which offers a 90-day health and fitness challenge. The company fits perfectly with her passion for fitness and health.

She plans to remain active with her church, Calvary Church in Boone’s Creek and is excited to see what God has planned for her next.

Through all she has accomplished, she attributes her success to God and her family.

“My mom and grandmother have inspired me to be who I am,” she says. “My mom was a single mom and she worked hard to see that my brother and I were taken very good care of and my grandparents played a huge roll. They were there to push me and keep me in check.

“My grandpa would tell me not to get the big head and not forget where I came from,” she continues.

“They have all been a strong influence in my faith.”

Wilson is the daughter of Debbie and John Potter of Mountain City, Tenn. and Jerry Wilson of Boone.

She says there are a couple pieces of advice she likes to share with young girls and others.

“You are not defined by your circumstances. Always use every negative experience to learn and do not settle. You should embrace every opportunity given to you,” she says.

Keisha believes everyone is equipped with unique gifts. “Whatever gift you’ve been given, don’t be idle with it. Use it to glorify God,” she says.

You are not defined by your circumstances.

Always use every negative experience to learn and do not settle. You should embrace every opportunity given to you. us certain opportunities and allows us to fulfill our ambitions as long as we keep him close to our hearts,” Keisha says.

“The world may crown success, but God crowns faithfulness,” she continues.

“Several people have asked if I was disappointed at not winning Miss Tennessee, but I think each experience I have had is just a small part of God’s great plan for my life.”

She believes God’s plan will allow her to reach out and help others.

To work in the medical field she has chosen, there are still a couple of state

HEATHER SAMUDIO heather@mountaintimes.com

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beauty

Aloe Vera

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Over time, we have come to realize and appreciate the benefits of aloe vera — especially the way it sooths our skin when used topically to treat a burn or wound.

Aloe (vera) can also be ingested and is thought to help the body with detoxification. Simply taking a form of aloe extract may assist with boosting the immune system and help the body rid itself of toxins and contaminants.

Use caution when taking digestible forms and/or high dosages of aloe extract — they can result in a strong laxative affect.

Small doses are used today in a variety of juice blends, but following a recipe from a reputable source is highly recommended to make sure the right amount is used.

Aloe is commonly found in many different skin care products or used alone in skin care regimens and natural treatments for various skin disorders.

The gel from the aloe leaves can sooth the skin and can also act as a moisturizer for dry skin or even oily skin.

When topically applied, the gel quickly absorbs into the skin’s surface without leaving an undesirable greasy residue.

If skin is inflamed due to acne and clogged pores, aloe is thought to aid in

reducing inflammation in the skin by generating new skin cells and therefore reducing the signs of scarring.

For more than 5,000 years, the documented wide range of benefits found through the use of the aloe vera plant, and especially the gel from its leaves, has been quite amazing.

However, just because a little is thought to be beneficial does not mean that more has greater benefits. It is a potent herb and should be used with respect and caution.

With most everything, there are benefits and risks, so if you take any medications on a regular basis, make sure to talk with your doctor before you start using aloe, especially in supplement form. It could interact with medicines and other supplements including those for diabetes and heart, with laxatives, steroids and licorice root.

Given the lack of evidence about its safety, aloe should not be used orally by children and women who are pregnant or breastfeeding. kelly penick Licensed aesthetician 828.773.3587

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

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highcountrycourtesies

‘You never get a second chance to make a first impression.’ −Unknown

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

Making a Great First Impression Applying the ABC’s

Three seconds. When meeting someone for the first time, an ingrained sensitivity in each of us begins to evaluate him or her, forming an impression in three seconds. We are wired to automatically assess others in regard to their appearance, body language, demeanor, verbal language and mannerisms.

Because first impressions set the tone for future relationships, we want others to perceive us positively. An awareness of the image we project, along with observance of a few courteous introduction skills, may help us improve the first impressions others form of us. Therefore to enhance the way we are treated and respected, consider the following ABC’s guidelines:

Appearance Whether we are attired for an interview, sweating on the greenway or shopping in the produce aisle, we can always present ourselves well. Understanding that a picture is worth a thousand words, we should strive to dress appropriately, expressing our individuality within the context of our setting. As a rule of thumb, the more valued an event (a formal social occasion, an important job interview, etc.), the more effort and care should be given to our appearance.

In general, the first thing people notice when meeting someone is the face — and the second is the hands. At all times, an extra moment spent grooming (teeth, hands, cleanliness, etc.) may be much appreciated, whereas the lack of said grooming

would be detrimental in someone’s first impression of us. The way we dress and groom ourselves reflects our self-respect and personal confidence.

Body language Our posture, facial expressions and eye contact communicate how we feel about ourselves and how we feel about others.

Are our shoulders tensed or relaxed? Are our hands fidgeting or calm? Lifting our head and straightening our shoulders presents a silhouette, suggesting a confident, assertive, determined person.

A sincere smile communicates we are pleased to meet this new acquaintance and interested in learning more about them. An easy, unforced smile reflects a positive attitude.

Our eye contact as we converse coveys our focused attention, our interest in others and our self-confidence. Steadily maintained eye contact fosters trust, whereas regularly broken eye contact — where one party or the other keeps glancing away — reflects disinterest, a lack of focus or nervousness. Repeated looking away can also be interpreted as insecurity or lack of truthfulness. We definitely take more seriously others who maintain consistent eye contact

Courtesy Our culture’s classic physical expression of greeting, the handshake, provides

several ways to demonstrate courtesy to others. We should always stand to meet someone before shaking his or her hand.

Standing reflects your respect and value for him or her. Our smile and eye contact continue to convey attentive interest. A firm, friendly shaking of the hand expresses our pleasure in meeting. Saying his or her name helps us to effectively learn the name as we acknowledge them.

Listen for conversation clues about common interests and experiences. Ask surface questions as you begin to get to know them. A possible starting point is the setting in which you have just met.

Show interest in learning about who they are.

Our words can be powerful agents to affirm, encourage and cheer others. When used intentionally, our words can foster goodwill and appreciation for others.

We all want to have friends, be wellliked and be remembered positively. Applying these ABCs may help foster stronger, positive first impressions and form a strong cornerstone for building future relationships.

Sharon Carlton Sharon Carlton, High Country Courtesies ©2013 As founder of High Country Courtesies, Sharon Carlton writes and speaks on modern etiquette and life skill topics. She is Director of High Country Cotillion, a social education program for youth and conducts High Country Courtesies customer service workshops.

Contact her at sharoncarlton@charter.net.

homedÉcorandmore

Photo by Linda Killian

Making the Old New Again 42

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What about that comfy, but aging couch or chair? Its fabric is worn and just can’t bear the thoughts of parting with it — who knows if you’ll ever find the same comfort in a newer model.

Take heart, you can make that old version new again with reupholstering.

My loveseat is a perfect example of how it all works.

There’s no better place for a nap or curling up with a good book.

I know without a doubt that I am at home when I’m on that loveseat. Plus, it’s been with me so long, it deserves its own name.

Last year, I experienced a house fire, and even though my comfy loveseat wasn’t burned, it was located next to the room that was.

When it was taken out to be cleaned, my beloved treasure began to fall apart; after all, the loveseat is 17-years old and the process of dry cleaning it (four times) took

its toll on its stitching and seams.

At first, I thought I would replace it.

After looking through several furniture stores, nothing really ‘grabbed’ me.

Then, the thought of reupholstering entered my mind. So, I began my search for fabric that I liked and something that would coordinate with my cabin décor.

Once again, nothing jumped out at me.

Following a two-week search — with no success — I decided to reconsider my options.

I had to ask myself, what did I really really want? We all know how, sometimes, we are determined to make something work. I call that the “just-get-it-done” attitude.

Immediately I thought of a chair I saw one time that I absolutely loved.

(Are you ready for this?) It was leather and hair on cowhide.

The hunt was on. I found two leather hides at a leather store in Boone and rummaged through a scrap-box filled with pieces of hair-on-hide.

I matched up the colors of browns and black, had my sofa delivered to a very good upholsters, and within two weeks I had my comfy couch back. The look is totally different than what I had, but I just adore it.

The cost of the hides and upholstery was much less than what I would have paid for a new loveseat in the same style.

So, my message is simple: Don’t throw out the old if it can be recovered. Take time to think about what you really want and start the hunt. Who knows, you may find a cow?

Each time I pass my loveseat in the loft, I have to stop and pet it.

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AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

43

The Superior Wolf Club “Is this seat taken?” Jane says as she glides to a table for four occupied by three women.

“No. Join us!” the woman in jeans and a plaid flannel shirt offers. The others smile encouragingly. “I’m Khaki, and these two are Tish and Jo.” “I’m Jane, traveling alone.”

“We are, too, Tish says. Jo nods in agreement.

The refurbished Great Lakes freighter, the M.S. Superior Waters, plows smoothly through Lake Michigan on this sunny August day.

On board are 40 “Lifelong Scholar Great Lakes Voyagers” eating lunch in the glass-enclosed dining room. They’ve already stopped at remote Beaver Island, heard a lecture on Great Lakes shipwrecks, glimpsed the Aurora Borealis, and spent a few hours hiking to the ancient white cedar grove on South Manitou Island.

Now the ship is heading toward the wilder waters of Lake Superior. This afternoon’s lecture will be a presentation on Great Lakes weather patterns.

Sometime tomorrow morning the ship will arrive at Isle Royale, where they will spend three days studying the wolf and moose population and identifying birds and wildflowers, staying either at a backpacker campsite or the luxurious Luna Lodge.

“Wasn’t that shipwreck lecture fascinating?” Jane asks. She brushes her or44

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ange silk shirt and casually arranges her striped scarf. Her fingernails sport matching orange polish. He silver-gray hair is swept back into a bun.

Their waiter serves tomato basil soup and pita chips.

“The lecture was interesting, but I’m really looking forward to our time on Isle Royale,” Khaki says. “It’s my dream place, my ultimate journey spot.” She tosses her gray ponytail.

“What do you mean, ultimate journey?” Jo asks. Her t-shirt says, “The Last Frontier,” lacking any indication of where that might be.

“Well, like your T-shirt says, it’s the last frontier, the wildest, farthest-out place, where moose and wolves can flourish. The wildest, farthest-out place for my spirit, too.” The silver wolf she’s wearing on a leather thong seems to echo her thought.

“Maybe I can flourish there, too. Solitude and silence are what I am looking for.”

The waiter serves grilled cheese sandwiches and spinach salad.

“Isle Royale seems dark and scary to me,” Tish says. Dressed in a loden green Columbia jacket and matching zip-offs, she looks ready for adventure, but her face shows hesitation.

“My brother Martin says I’m lucky to be going to Isle Royale, but I don’t know,” she says. “He tracks wolves in Yellowstone and would give anything to see their Isle Royale cousins. Me, I’d rather stay on the

boat and enjoy the scenery.”

“Not me! I can’t wait to photograph a moose or a wolf,” Jo says as she pats the camera she’s wearing around her neck.

“Do you think we’ll get close enough to them? What I love is fog. A baby moose and its mother in fog. How about that?”

“Have you read that mystery by Nevada Barr, about the woman park ranger on Isle Royale?” Jane asks. “Wow, that was an exciting and scary murder!” Tish goes a little pale.

Jane continues, “I’m keeping a journal.” She shows them her dark green corduroy book with a leather moose on the cover. “Maybe I’ll write an Isle Royale mystery of my own.”

“Wow, I’ll read it!” Tish says. “Do you have the Nevada Barr book with you? I’ll hole up at Luna Lodge, read, and have some hot cocoa. Are you all staying at the lodge, too?”

“Heck no. I’m camping,” Jo says, her eyes sparkle with anticipation.“I want to be out at the crack of dawn, exploring the mysteries of fog, maybe jot notes for my essay.”

“Me, too,” echoes Khaki. “Sitting around a campfire eating flapjacks and writing poetry — it doesn’t get much better than that.”

“What kind of poetry do you write?”

Jane asks. “My favorite poet is Mary Oliver. Her nature poetry is amazing.”

“I like her, too,” Khaki replies. “If only I

could write like that. I hope to get a poem or two out of this experience.”

“Khaki, where did you get your silver wolf?” Jo asks. “That’s a perfect talisman for your sojourn on Isle Royale.”

“My grandmother passed this wolf down to me,” Khaki says, fingering the little creature, lovingly. “When I was looking in an old trunk of hers a couple of years ago, I found three more wolves just like this one. I had holes drilled in them and put them on thongs, too.”

“I belonged to a wolf club when I was in grade school,” Tish says. “Three of us had ratty old coonskin jackets we wore to school on meeting days. We studied all about wolves, wrote a wolf song, a wolf play, and a wolf poem, and presented them at a school assembly. I think Martin got his love of wolves from me, and now look at him — he’s become the go-to person for wolf lore in Yellowstone. I can still remember our wolf call.”

She throws her head back, and to the

amusement of the entire dining room, lets out a convincing “A-roooo!”

“Whoa!” shouts Jane. “That sends chills up my spine. You’re a very convincing wolf. Does anyone know what a moose sounds like?”

Everyone around the table draws a blank.

“Guess we’ll find out soon,” Jo says.

Khaki leaves the table as the rest concentrate on their hot fudge sundaes. She returns moments later swinging three silver wolves on leather thongs. “Here you go,” she says cheerily, handing a necklace to each of the others. “Now we’ll have our very own wolf club.

Isle Royale, here we come!”

sue spirit Writes poetry and essays about nature, spirituality, writing, and travel. She has a little cabin in the mountains. degreesoffreedom@frontier.com

More Information Road Scholar, an adventure travel program for persons mostly over 50, offers “Isle Royale, Lake Superior, and the Keweenaw Peninsula” two weeks in July and August of every year. The trip includes hiking, canoeing, learning about wolves and moose, an island trip, wildflower hike, lighthouse, and programs on the Great Lakes.

Participants travel to Isle Royale on the Ranger III and stay at Rock Harbor Lodge.

Check out the full program at www.roadscholar.com, program No. 1583RJ.

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

45

School Days,

Dear Old Golden Rule Days ‘School days, school days Dear old golden rule days Readin’ and ‘ritin’ and ‘rithmetic Taught to the tune of the hickory stick’ . . .

Does anyone besides me remember those “good old days”

As a high school sophomore in 1976, and contestant in the Miss Avery High School pageant, the evening gown competition was much easier to bear for a young, innocent Sherrie Pritchard, than was the humiliating talent segment that soon followed.

Photos submitted

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as described in this once familiar song?

The lyrics were written by Will D. Cobb in 1907, but held true, at least for the most part, through my high school education, which ended 71 years later.

Yes, the golden rule was enforced during my school days, the subjects of study were fairly simple, and I learned a lot through the use of something similar to the hickory stick — at least the notorious one belonging to Ray Benfield, at Crossnore Elementary School.

I think my pride hurt worse than anything else on that particular day when Mr. Benfield applied the paddle to my behind during seventh grade. I don’t remember exactly what I did to rile him to that point, but I’m quite sure I deserved it, and more than likely, got a repeat performance at home that afternoon.

Things sure have changed through the years, but I’m glad I grew up when I did.

I began to learn how to read in first grade through the tender guidance of Hazel Cole; I remember Maude Angel helping me hone those skills a year or so later, telling me, as I stumbled on a word and rolled my eyes to the ceiling, that I wouldn’t find it written any plainer “up there.”

My love for the written word was nurtured all the way through eighth grade by the gentle kindness of our librarian, Lois Edwards.

My second grade teacher, Leota Coffey, was a great example that a lady can be beautiful from the inside out.

A year later, Gladys Stout, giving me a turn at operating the film projector, taught

me that good behavior always pays off.

Evelyn Huskins encouraged me to explore my interest in creative writing in the fourth grade, even if she did (strongly) prefer that I use my “right” hand when applying the pencil to paper. My natural tendency for being a southpaw won the battle.

Margaret Beam taught me that you have to be serious once in a while and that not everything is funny — especially pieces of chalk that rarely missed their target when flying through the air.

I loved it when our hometown girl, Ramona Henson (Sturgill) finished college and returned to teach at Crossnore. She was everything that a young girl in the sixth grade aspired to be —and more.

At about that same time, or maybe a year or so later, hometown boy, Bobby Watson also returned to teach at his alma mater and taught me the meaning of a satellite in such a visual way that stuck with me for life.

And then, things began to get interesting as I “moved up,” actually down the hill to middle school.

My English teacher, Tom Hall, made me stand in front of the room reciting those (horrible) poems — knowing all the time that I would never complete a single stanza without several of my male counterparts (John, Mark, Roger, Russell and Ricky) getting me tickled to the point of hysteria. No mercy was shown. I couldn’t sit down until I was finished.

I was a marshal in seventh grade for the eighth-grade gradation and the next year, was an honor student at my own graduation from junior high school. I rambled through a speech about “doing the right thing,” or something like that. It was the first time I ever used the word “mortality”

and referred to John Dunn who suffered from a severe stutter and took up writing to express himself. Perhaps, it was a sign of things to come.

The lovely Jane Clark gave me a passing grade through home economics, I’m sure mainly to save my mother from disappointment. (I still can’t sew, Mrs. Clark.)

Ironically enough, I still have a semblance of a “magazine” depicting my dream home that I compiled in her class that landed me an “A.” Piano lessons from music teacher Tommy Hartley? They lasted about as long as my latest crush. It was best, he said, for me to explore other interests.

Memories of my first eight years of school remain much more vivid than my four years at Avery High.

I still maintained decent grades, but once my best friends who were older, graduated earlier, very little held my attention.

My drama teacher, the beloved David Harris did inspire me to find my creative self; Leona Moldenhour tried to teach me typing, but the day she discovered me writing a love letter, rather than completing her assignment — and making me read my “work” aloud to the class — I was beyond humiliated and had no desire to type another word. (Well, that eventually changed, too, since I now type for a living.)

Should I really dig up my most awful high school memory when, as a sophomore, I was encouraged to enter the Miss Avery High pageant? For my talent, I was portraying Eve in the Garden of Eden.

(Forget the visuals; I was in pretty good shape back then and wore a flesh-tone body suit with a huge leaf.)

My friend, David Singleton had helped me write a soliloquy based on what we thought a modern-day Eve might’ve been thinking at the time.

All was well for my first few lines — and then, I forgot everything. And, there was no recovery.

After a few awkward moments of standing alone in the garden (Adam was nowhere around of course, this was a onewoman show), I was beyond humiliation when the curtains closed.

The compassionate applause on the other side of the red velvet drape did nothing to ease my pain, nor did the sympathetic hugs that followed the pageant.

Need I say more?

There’s never been a happier high school graduate that Sherrie was, she says, pictured here during her 1978 ceremony.

I was later chosen to participate in some other teenage pageant that, luckily, required no talent or stage performance.

Even then, I never once considered completing the entry form. Once was enough for this old girl.

I was way before my time in several respects. My friends gave me a hard time for my choice in shoes — I loved the cork three-inch wedged sandals that have made a comeback today. There is a picture of my shoes in my freshman yearbook.

I loved English and religion classes with Rock Hall, who always gave me a boost of confidence and made me believe in myself.

I adored Doris Shell, too, and still don’t know why I didn’t take her business cours-

es. I was too much of a dreamer to get technical. I guess that’s why I didn’t like science, biology or anything to do with numbers.

I went through a bit of a rebellious streak those last two years of high school.

I let my grades slip and on graduation night, my English teacher, Renie Quilter, (almost jokingly) asked what I was doing there, as I took my place in the processional line-up.

Several of us celebrated our milestone that night by going to Solliceto’s in Boone, while others took the proverbial trip to the beach.

I entered Mayland Community College the next fall. I excelled in math under John Keene who made numbers fun for me, at last. I studied criminal justice under such great instructors as (Judge) Alexander Lyerly, who helped me cultivate my self-confidence and still calls me his friend today.

I made the Dean’s List, but decided to get married instead of pursuing my education.

Twenty-some odd years later, after enduring many painful, but productive lessons in the school of life, I returned to classes at Caldwell Community College — just to see if I could do it. In a short time, I qualified for the president’s list. I did it.

As I matured, I learned that life, in itself, is the greatest classroom one can enter. There’s always a lesson to learn, but nothing can compare to those early school days — those dear old golden rule days.

sherrie norris Editor, All About Women

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47

MAKE SCHOOL LUNCHES

FUN

To make back-to-school more fun for the kids, encourage the youngsters to help prepare their own lunches and snacks — probably the night before, to avoid increased frustration on already hectic mornings.

Use the following ideas in a joint effort, or just turn the kids loose to come up with their own creations.

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BREAKFAST BANANA BAGEL A wholesome grab-and-go breakfast, quick to make and eat on the run 2 tablespoons natural nut butter, such as almond, cashew, or peanut 1 teaspoons honey 1 whole-wheat bagel, split and toasted 1 small banana, sliced Stir together nut butter and honey in a small bowl. Divide mixture between bagel halves and top with banana slices.

CRUNCH AND MUNCH A healthier alternative to traditional crunchy snacks 4 tablespoons butter ¼ cup frozen orange or apple juice concentrate

ANTS IN THE ROCKS A great way to enjoy a bagged snack or with lunch Graham crackers Chocolate chips or raisins Place graham crackers in a plastic sandwich bag and break into coarse pieces. Add a few chocolate chips or raisins to make ants; seal the bag.

¼ cup brown sugar 2 teaspoons cinnamon 3 cups oatmeal cereal squares (i.e. Quaker Oatmeal Squares)

BANANA CHOCOLATE CRUNCH POPSICLES

2 cups pretzel sticks 1½ cups whole almonds

FUN WRAPS Easy to make and leaves room for creativity Tortillas Cold cuts and cheese of choice, thinly sliced Chopped veggies (lettuce, cucumbers, pickles, olives) Mustard, mayonnaise or thick sandwich dressing of choice Lay a tortilla out flat and spread lightly with mayonnaise, mustard or dressing.

Layer with a slice each of ham, turkey and cheese. Add lettuce, olives, cucumbers, and pickles. Roll up wrap and cut into round bite-sized pieces, if desired, or leave whole.

1 cup raisins or dried cranberries Heat oven to 300º. Place butter, juice concentrate and sugar in a large, microwave-safe bowl; microwave on high for 45 seconds to melt butter. Stir in cinnamon.

Spread oatmeal squares, pretzels and almonds in single layer on a baking sheet.

Toss with melted-butter mixture to coat.

Bake mix, stirring pieces every 10 minutes until mixture is dry to touch and nuts are lightly toasted, about 30 minutes.

Remove pan from oven and stir in dried fruit.

Let mix cool completely. Store in airtight container; divide into Ziplock bags for school lunch or snack.

A perfect after-school treat

1 banana Chocolate syrup Chopped nuts or granola Peel banana: place popsicle stick in one end. Dip banana in chocolate syrup and roll in nuts or granola. Freeze for 2-3 hours.

AUGUST 2013 | AAWMAG.COM

49

‘I don’t think of all the misery — but of the beauty that still remains.’

– Anne Frank

Photo by Sherrie Norris

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