All About Women - October 2008

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Claiming our Victories!

OCTOBER 2008

Featuring: •Women behind the scenes of ASU’s 3-time National Champions

Success Stories: •Living The American Dream •OASIS Client Shares Victory •Recovery House: It’s Not Easy Street •There is Power In The Purse

Hope & Inspiration: •Breast Cancer Survivor •Overcoming Secret Battle •Lively Octogenarian On The Go •Sisters Reflect On A Life Well-lived

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Claiming Victories Contents: PROFILES 5 “Jivin’ Jeanne” Morris:

Enthusiasm For Life Keeps

Adventurous Octogenarian On

The Go and In The Know,

by Sherrie Norris 8 Minding Her Own Business:

May Weller of New River

Trading Company Lives The

American Dream 12 Connie Norris - Local Nurse

Shares Her Journey Through

Breast Cancer, by Sherrie Norris 22 It’s A Woman’s Job: Shelly Wilson,

Breaking The Stained Glass

Ceiling by Corrinne Loucks 58 Betsy Patrick - Staying The Course

by Yozette “Yogi” Collins 32

34

36

37

38

40

42 48

WOMEN BEHIND THE SCENES of asu mountaineers’ success stories by Sherrie Norris Julia Adams as Mrs. Yosef ASU’s #1 Cheerleader You Go Girl! Trisha Threatt, ASU Cheerleader Avery And Watauga Women On ASU Cheering Squad Food & Entertaining, Tailgating - A New Family Affair

by Molly Petrey Football 101: It’s All About Women Behind Every Successful Man...

More Women In “Sporting” Roles at ASU

Feminine features 10 Women’s Studies Lecture Series 14 Local Health System Adds

Powerful Tool In Fight For Early

Detection of Breast Cancer

(Courtesy of Appalachian

Regional Healthcare System) 16 Keeping Kim Close To Heart

by Sherrie Norris 18 October: Breast Cancer

Awareness Month - Know

The Facts 4 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

OCTOBER 2008

20

26 28

56

57

Recovery House: No Easy Street

by Yozette “Yogi” Collins Halloween In The High Country Power In The Purse - Here’s The Proof A (Typical) Day At OASIS

by Rebecca Gummere Breaking The Cycle Of Violence An OASIS Client Shares Her Story

Columns 11 Soundings, by Rebecca Gummere 30 Heartfelt: The Victory Of

Following My Heart

by Teri Wiggans 54 Mom’s World: Claming Our

Victories by Heather W. Jordan 62 Young At Heart: To The Victor Go

The Spoils by Heather Young In every issue 24 All About Crafts: Boo Lady Pot

Serves Up Treats For Halloween

by Nancy Morrison 32 Parenting Page: Courtesy

of Watauga Children’s Council 50 Pet Page: “In Loving Memory

Of Jean-Luc” by Genevieve Austin 52 Cent$ & Sensibility: Travel On

A Dime by Corrinne Loucks 60 Entertainment Suggestions:

Courtesy of Black Bear Books 64 Healthy Lady: Bulimia: The Secret

Battle by Bonnie Church with Pattie

Driesell 65 Calendar Of Events 66 He Is All About Women: Chef

Michael Forman of Bistro Roca/

Antlers Bar

PUBLISHER Nancy Morrison nancy.morrison@averyjournal.com 828-733-2448 editor Sherrie Norris sherrie@aawmag.com 828-264-3612 SALES/MARKETING MANAGER Sara Sellers Golini 828-264-3612 sales@aawmag.com Graphic Artist Marianne Koch graphics@aawmag.com

Contributing writers Genevieve Austin Bonnie Church Yozette “Yogi” Collins Rebecca Gummere Heather W. Jordan Corrinne Loucks Molly Petrey Teri Wiggans Heather Young Cover photo by Mark Mitchell Any reproduction of news articles, photographs, or advertising artwork is strictly prohibited without permission from management. ©Copyright 2008 A Mountain Times Publication

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JeanneMorris | Adventurous Octogenarian On The Go and In The Know

Photo by Sherrie Norris

By Sherrie Norris

F

ew octogenarians today identify with the daring spirit of Jeanne Morris, her enthusiasm for life like a magnet drawing a crowd.

Whether at the wheel of a classic car, parasailing over the open water or rafting down the river, Jeanne, at 86, vows never to be one of those “old people” who rock their life away on the front porch. “You’ve got to get out, meet people. Not everyone thinks the same about life - it’s good to get a different perspective once in a while.”

“Jivin’ Jeanne,” as depicted on the license plate of her van and stitched across the back of her stadium chair, says it all. She’s on-the-go and in-theknow, enjoying life to its fullest.

Sharing homes between the High Country and Florida, Jeanne and her husband H.V., married for 61 years, have lived the fairy tale life.

“He picked me up in Virginia Beach while I was on vacation with a friend.” With a chuckle, she shares her “love at first sight” story:“My friend and I had dated two guys the night before I met H.V. They returned the next day to pick us up. At the last minute, we decided that we really didn’t want to go with them and headed out the front door in the opposite direction. That’s when I saw H.V., a handsome Navy officer who stole my heart.”

Romance ensued. Jeanne returned to her Greensburg, PA; home, love letters followed and soon afterward, a personal visit. “He kept writing to me and finally proposed. He came to see me again, gave me a ring and, almost a year later, we were married.”

The newlyweds began their life together in Louisville, KY, where the groom worked for a drug company. “Leaning toward becoming a doctor, H.V. had two years of college under his belt when he took flying lessons, excelling and becoming a flight instructor himself. Soon he met a man who needed a pilot and who offered him a good job. He eventually worked his way up to CEO of that company – Mother’s Cookie Company – in Louisville.”

In the meantime, Jeanne “had some college, but got bored,” and accepted employment as a school guard. “They wanted me to be a police officer and sent me to the University of Louisville. I finished there as a teacher.”

For 25 years, Jeanne taught K-8 grades and retired as a psychological examiner from Kentucky’s Jefferson County Public Schools.

Jeanne treasures her career memories, admitting, however, she didn’t particularly like the psychological testing part of it. “That’s when we started dooming children to special education when only discipline was needed,” she states.

She had a few close calls along the way. “I was testing a high school boy one day. All of a sudden, he threw the testing material all over the place and grabbed me, dragging me outside into a cul-de-sac, picked up a stick and threatened to kill me. Luckily, we could be seen from the front office window and help soon arrived. It turned out that he had beaten up a couple of other people. It was scary, but just one incident of many that I experienced.”

Jeanne feels that many of today’s parents fail to give their children the things they want and need most – time, love and discipline. “You just can’t give in to their every whim. It doesn’t work that way.”

Prior to retirement, Jeanne and H.V. developed numerous hobbies and interests, one of the most intense involving classic autos. “We started out with single-engine Corvairs. My husband collected 11 of them and stored them at the airport.We kept getting into it [collecting cars], one at a time, all makes and models.”

Standing beside her 1937 Packard at Mack Brown’s Classic Car Show, Jeanne pointed to it, saying, “This is the fourth one of these we’ve had. It was a rare find, but he [H.V.] still keeps looking.”

Attending classic car events opens the doors, Jeanne states, “to making new friends and meeting old ones.” The couple is well-known along the east coast among fellow enthusiasts, taking coveted awards at various shows, such last year’s Southeast Region’s Safety Award in Louisville. As members of High Country Classic Car Club, Jeanne and H.V. attend local events while in Boone, and rarely miss the big shows when in Florida.

The couple discovered the High Country during a visit with their daughter, Colleen Brudzinski, and her husband, owners of Blue Horse Promotions in Boone.

“My husband likes to fish. One time we came in our RV and he found a good trout stream here. He said, ‘Let’s buy a house,’ and we did, just like that.”

Jeanne has found her own niche playing bridge and swimming “and we share the old cars.” She also enjoys reading, stays busy at St. Elizabeth’s Catholic Church as lector and Eucharist minister, and belongs to a lot of clubs.“I love Boone . . . there’s just something special about this community and its people. They make me feel so welcome. ASU offers so many opportunities for senior citizens, including the Senior Scholars program that we enjoy.

Describing herself as “politically motivated . . . toward a conservative movement,” Jeanne isn’t registered here, but she’s involved in the Republican Women’s Club. Her name is also on the roster of Worthwhile Woman’s Club, AARP, etc.

Referring to her “adventurous” nature, Jeanne spoke of her world travels to locales such as China, Spain, Germany (“where I studied”), New Zealand, Australia, and beyond. “And anywhere I can spend time outdoors . . . I like to camp and hike, though I’m a bit limited right now due to my knee replacement. If my back hadn’t gone out on me, I’d love to do that Zipline thing I heard about!”

When asked about personal philosophies, Jeanne’s response is immediate. “I’m going to be happy where I am.There are a lot of things in life you wish hadn’t happened, or had happened differently, but you’ve just got to be happy.”

She loves to people watch – especially children. “You can learn a lot about people that way.” She adds, “There are very few people you can’t enjoy talking to. Everyone has a story.”

Brought up in Pennsylvania as an only child whose father was a railroad man, her mother a homemaker, Jeanne had “a regular” childhood.

“I have had a fulfilling, wonderful life. I have no regrets. I still have my husband, he still loves me and just as importantly, we still like each other.

We have two wonderful daughters who have wonderful families of their own. Those four grandchildren are something else . . . and our one greatgrandson just turned 10 months old.What more could we ask for?”

(We wanted to get H.V.’s perspective on his daring bride, but he was in Florida . . . something about his new motorcycle.)

Send comments or questions for Sherrie to: Sherrie@aawmag.com. aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 5

Nancy’s note...

Celebrating October

We have had an overwhelming response from readers and advertisers who love the new All About Women of the High Country.

Your comments and support have meant so much our staff members who have worked so hard to take this magazine in a totally new direction. Thank you and please tell our wonderful advertisers you read about them in All About Women of the High Country.

We have just made the transition into fall and it’s football season.

It seemed appropriate to honor our own Appalachian University Mountaineer football team, national champions three years in a row, by featuring the women behind the team who are winners themselves. Our October theme, “Claiming Our Victories,” salutes the winning women of the High Country in all walks of life.

October is the time of victorious teams, changing colors in the landscape, crisp and cool weather, and piles of swirling leaves. October is also about Halloween, a favorite event for “kids” of all ages. It is about Oktoberfest, a celebration of the harvest, a victory of man over nature if crops are brought to fruition.

And it is the time of the year the amazing women of the High Country prepare for the coming winter. In the old days in Ashe, Avery, and Watauga counties, preparation for winter was essential and women did the bulk of it. Fruits and vegetables were canned, wool was woven into warm items of clothing for the whole family, while the men laid in a supply of firewood and cured meats.

These days almost everything is different. We purchase most of our winter clothing, we can obtain fresh fruit and vegetables all year long in our local grocery stores. Most of us heat our houses with furnaces or heat pumps and large meat packinghouses provide an almost endless variety of meat.

With the lessening of household responsibilities has come the opportunity for the women of the High Country to branch out and try new ventures and claim victories in many different areas. Our October issue celebrates these very special woman and their accomplishments.

Again, thank you for your support. Let us hear your ideas and suggestions. This magazine is your magazine. We want to publish articles on people dear to your heart and subjects that catch your interest. So let us know what we can do to give you an even better magazine in the coming months.

Enjoy this beautiful month – Nancy Morrison, Publisher

Sherrie’s note...

Claiming Our Victories Most of us love to succeed and are usually able to do so at “something” along life’s pathway. For each of us, that “something” is as unique as the individual.Whether at work or at play, in most everything we do – the majority of women have an innate desire to arrive at the top.

This month, in “Claiming Our Victories,” we are taking a look at women who are winners in every sense of the word – a breast cancer survivor, a champion athlete, a female minister, and women who are regaining self-sufficiency, some after more than their share of hard knocks, including one who has successfully removed herself from domestic abuse.

Also, we’re giving you an up-close and personal glimpse into the lives of women behind the scenes of the ASU Mountaineers national football champions – wives, secretaries, cheerleaders, tailgaters and others who stand proudly behind the winning team.You know the old saying, “Behind every successful man . . . .”

We’re introducing you to an energetic, fearless octogenarian who thinks nothing of adventures such as parasailing.

You will meet women who effectively operate their own businesses and those who make life better for others by their numerous contributions to society in general.

We’re thrilled to have had more success stories than space allowed this month, therefore, we’ll be sharing additional “victories” with you in November’s Thanks For Giving issue.

We are so excited about the overwhelming response we’re receiving about our magazine and are happy that this copy has found its way into your hands today.

As always, reader critique is important to us. Please feel free to let us know your thoughts. Got an idea for a great feature?

Contact us today.Want to see articles on particular subjects? Let us know. Really like something we are doing? Tell us! This is your magazine and we want to hear from you.

Victoriously and together we stand – Women of the High Country. It’s all about us!

Claiming it today Sherrie Norris, Editor

AAW staff members: (clockwise from top) Nancy Morrison, Sara Golini, Sherrie Norris and Marianne Koch.

WELCOME 6 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

We want to hear from you. Email us at comments@AAWmag.com

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May Weller

Lives the American M

Dream

ay Weller can hardly believe it’s been eight years since she first set foot on American soil in Los Angeles, California - “half a world away from my home in Bangkok,Thailand.”

Describing her first US visit as “little more than a whirlwind tour” to places like Atlantic City, New York and Charleston, that brief two-week trip was all it took to convince her she had to return to this country. “I had fallen in love with America,” she states, and often has to “pinch” herself to believe she’s been here that long.

“Dreaming about moving to the USA to live and actually doing it are two very different things,” she admits. It took her an additional two years of hard work and planning, combined with a refusal to give up on her dream, to make it a reality.

Her “adventure” began much earlier, she recalls.

“As a child growing up in a third world country, I was a reluctant witness to hardships and injustices quite foreign to those born and raised in the relative comfort of America.”

Comparatively poor by American standards in her family of seven children, she and her siblings were all required to “actively contribute” to ensure even basic standards. From the age of 13 until she finished college, every one of her days began at 4:30 a.m. “My parents won, by auction, the right to manage a food kiosk at a local school and I helped in the morning to sell the food. I would get home before noon to clean up the house, then shower and head off to school, with my classes held from 1- 7 p.m. In the evening, I would return home and help prepare all the food for cooking for the next day. This took until midnight. Believe me, some days I spent more time asleep in class than awake!”

After college, she struck it lucky. “I could type fast and was hired as an office clerk at Thai Airway International.” She moved around “a fair bit” and became involved in the “very busy” catering production division – “forecasting and planning food consumption and presentation.”

“The catering International Building employed over 1.000 people.

We produced food for 43-45 airlines - about 34,000 meals per day - and operated 24 hours per day. Though much bigger than my family’s operation, it still did not pay that well. To get by, I needed to work yet another part-time job. “

Even after 13 years, May recalls, “There really was no further opportunity for advancement. I had mastered my job and was bored.”

Unlike in America, she states, “One can’t just change jobs and move on. Unfortunately, opportunities were largely confined to those with 8 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Photo by Mark Mitchell

minding her own business

power, money or privilege . . . the best jobs and privileges acquired and granted to those with dollars to slip under the table. So I came to America. Alone.”

For three years, May worked and traveled to many different places including Kentucky, Georgia, Washington DC, Niagara Falls, Atlantic City, Indianapolis, New York and Cherokee, before moving to Asheville.

The next chapter of her life, she describes as “getting swept off my feet and landing in a retail store.”

Roger, (her then husband-to-be) happened to love Thai food.“Lucky for me,” she states. “A chance meeting at the restaurant in Asheville where I was working at the time, began a new era in my life.

“She adds, “Seems that everyone had heard of CW Moose in Black Mountain, just 15 minutes away.Well, that was his store!

After we were married, I naturally helped out there occasionally, but one year his manager pulled up stakes and moved to Hawaii in the busiest part of the season. Quite unexpectedly, the responsibilities of selling, placing orders, organizing the store, and setting up displays became mine.

I loved it! And, Roger and I discovered we made a great team in that arena as well!”

The business started booming, she recalls, sending her off to trade shows in places like Mexico,Thailand, Atlanta, Miami, Las Vegas, buying silver jewelry, handbags, clothes, quilts “and numerous other exotic items.”

She was in her “element” and helped take the store through its best season ever!

“Our heirloom quilts began selling so well, we even had to open an additional specialty store, Black Mountain Quilts, to handle the volume.”

At about the same time, Roger began “musing about retirement,” and placed a test ad on the Internet offering the businesses for sale. “He had been in retail for 40 years by that time and wanted to take a break. Imagine our surprise when several prospective buyers quickly surfaced!”

Approximately one year ago, the couple sold both stores as turn-key operations, eagerly anticipating some foreign travel “but this time, as real tourists!”

A chance trip through West Jefferson last fall changed their plans.

“On our way home from vacationing at Watauga Lake, just over the Tennessee line, we happened to stop in West Jefferson . . . and we went ‘WOW!’”

The couple could hardly believe the quality of the galleries, restaurants and stores. “Everyone was nice and friendly, everything seemed so beautiful and peaceful, and the views of the mountains and rivers just blew us away. What a great place for a business, we thought. And there it was – a ’For Sale by Owner’ sign in the old Atwood Jewelry Building.”

Wasting no time contacting the owner, the couple soon found themselves proud new owners of the premises, transforming the business into New River Trading Company. The main street store in downtown West Jefferson has been open for over a year now, Monday through Saturday-10 a.m. until 5:30 p.m.

“Roger rather likes his semi-retirement, preferring to choose the back seat to the day-to-day running of the store, so you will probably find just me there.”

May offers an open invitation:“Do drop in. If you are interested in chatting about Thailand, Thai food, or anything else, or just want to check out our merchandise, please come by and see me. I would love to meet you!”

For more information, call (336) 846 2727.

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

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A A S A P S D A

Clipart.com image

Women’s Studies Lecture Series In Progress At ASU

T

he fall semester of The Women’s Studies Program at Appalachian State University is currently in progress and will continue to offer a series of lectures during October and November, with a focus on women’s and gender studies.

The series “Distinguished Lectures on Women, Sex, and Gender” kicked-off in late August, featuring talks by scholars from various disciplines who are exploring issues such as teenage girls and Internet predators, women and careers in information technology, men and masculinity in today’s job market, rape and binge drinking on college campuses and the “gender” of school shootings.

The series started in late August with the following lecturers: Dr. Denise Martz from Appalachian’s Department of Psychology opened the series with “Is ‘Fat Talk’ Really So Phat in Popular Culture?” on Thursday, Aug. 28, followed in September by Dr. Michael Kimmel, from State University of New York-Stony Brook’s Department of Sociology, with his presentation “Mars and Venus, or Planet Earth: Women and Men in the 21st Century.”

Dr. Sarah Greenwald from Appalachian’s Department of Math presented “Math is Not Only a Young Man’s Game” in September, and Tristan Bridges, from the University of Virginia, presented “Dangerous Boys and Daring Girls: What Bestselling Children’s Books are Teaching Kids about Gender.” Using examples from popular culture, Bridges addressed some of the nuances of gender in everyday life.

Dr. Curtis Ryan, from Appalachian’s Department of Government and Justice Studies, presented “Islam and Women’s Rights in Middle East Politics” on Thursday, Sept. 25.With a specialty in international and Middle East politics/particular interests in inter-Arab relations, Islam and politics, alliances, democratization, security, and international terrorism, Ryan spoke on women’s rights in Islam in both theory and practice.

If you missed the earlier lectures, there is much more to come: •Thursday, Oct. 2, Dr. Neva Specht presents “She Writes like a Man: Gender and the Historical Profession.” Specht is an associate professor in Appalachian’s Department of History. Her presentation will explore how historian Barbara Tuchman’s gender, coupled with her lack of academic credentials, left her open to increased scrutiny from Ph.D.trained historians.Tuchman is one of the best-known historians of the 20th century and published 11 books, numerous articles, essays and reviews, and garnered two Pultizer prizes—all without earning a Ph.D. •Dr. Ed Behrend-Martinez from Appalachian’s Department of History will present “Shrew-taming and Correction: Western Traditions of Wife Battery” on Thursday, Oct. 9. He will discuss his archival research on the history of domestic violence in Spain and its significance in understandings domestic violence in the United States and elsewhere.

•Christine Watkins from Invision Inc. in New York will discuss “A Woman in Charge: Creating and Running a Company in a MaleDominated Field” Thursday, Oct. 23. Watkins is the founder and CEO of Invision Inc., the leading provider of revenue management solutions to television networks and other sellers of national commercial time.

•“She’s Got a Gun” will be presented Thursday, Oct. 30, by Dr. Nancy Floyd from Georgia State University. Floyd explores the world of women

Thank You

10 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

and guns in the United States through the photographs she took when visiting gun ranges on ladies’ nights. She uses documentary photography, history, sociology and personal experiences as guides to understanding American women’s complex and fascinating relationship to firearms.

•Dr. Trina Seitz presents “Gender Parity and the Execution of Rosanna Lightner Phillips” Thursday. Nov 6. Seitz is an associate professor in Appalachian’s Department of Sociology. Her presentation focuses on the 1943 execution of Phillips, an African American and N.C. native who was executed in the state’s gas chamber for the 1942 slaying of her white Durham County employer. Seitz has completed a first book on the history of the death penalty in North Carolina from 1909-1940.

•A talk on “Asheville’s Allen School and the Education of African-American Girls” will be presented Thursday, Nov. 13 by Dr. Patricia Beaver, a professor of anthropology at Appalachian and director of the university’s Center for Appalachian Studies. From the 1880s through the 1970s, the Allen School in Asheville served the education needs of many young girls from western North Carolina’s African-American communities.

Beaver and Appalachian studies graduate students have interviewed former faculty and students of the Allen School and collected archival materials, which are now housed in the W.L. Eury Appalachian Collection Archives in Belk Library and Information Commons on campus.

•Jean-Anne Sutherland presents “Isn’t a Good Mother Supposed to Feel Guilty? Mothering, Guilt and Shame” Thursday, Nov. 20. Sutherland is an assistant professor of sociology at UNC-Wilmington.

She will discuss the gendered nature of parenting, letting the voices of mothers reveal the foundations of guilt and shame that lie in current constructions of motherhood, specifically the good mother, the mommy wars and mothering in the home.

The presentations are held from 5 - 6:15 p.m. in Room 114 Belk Library and Information Commons. The lectures are free and open to the public.

For more information, call (828) 262-7603 or e-mail womens_st@appstate.edu.

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com

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Soundings

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By Rebecca Gummere

er name was Anne Tangeman and I’ve been waiting about a dozen years to tell her story.

She was eleven when I met her. At the time, I was serving as a pastor at a large Lutheran church in Ohio. Anne’s mom, struggling with the loneliness and financial burdens of being single, had been glad to discover the companionship of other women at our church. After she and I had met for the first time, she brought her two daughters, Anne and Erin, to talk with me about being baptized.

Both girls had beautiful gleaming red hair and bright smiles. Anne’s smile was brightest, though, and her crystal blue eyes seemed to spark, lit from within. Her sister, Erin, was shyer and stood quietly behind her older sibling.

We talked that day about what it meant to be baptized and what it meant to become part of the faith community. The family began attending together but the baptisms didn’t take place until several months later. The day before they occurred, we met so the girls would know exactly how we were going to proceed. Anne arrived with a large “goose egg” on her head.

“She’s learning how to ride her bike,” her mom told me, rolling her eyes and smiling. “She insisted I take off the training wheels.”

Anne laughed, placing her hand over her wide-open mouth.The sound was like spring water bubbling up from somewhere deep down, and it caused something deep inside me to want to answer. The following day I baptized both girls. Anne wore a velvet dress.

Over the next couple of years, Anne and her family were a faithful and constant presence at church, jumping in to volunteer, eager to help with various projects and events. Both girls were involved in lots of other activities, too, but especially Anne. She was a Girl Scout, a cheerleader, played softball, loved to ride her bike and had fallen in love with horseback riding, had ridden as the special guest of the Grand Marshall in the Fourth of July parade one year, and was taking dance classes. After spotting a low-flying airplane one afternoon, she’d even begun pestering her poor mother about

trying skydiving. She was extraordinarily popular with her peers. They were drawn to her as if to a magnet, because they thought she was just about the coolest person around.

Anne always had a wide smile on her face, and her blue eyes danced as if to the tune of distant music mere mortals weren’t privy to.Whenever I saw her, I was blessed with a huge hug and her trademark belly-laugh, for she always found something to be joyful about.The rest of that day, I’d walk with a little more spring in my step.

All of this would be amazing enough, without the fact that Anne Tangeman had been born with spina bifida, had endured dozens of surgeries, on good days used her cumbersome crutches to help her get around, and on the other days relied on her wheelchair.

But Anne was anything but disabled. What I might have been tempted to see as disabilities, she simply saw as annoying blockades around which she’d do an end-run. She gave me pictures of herself on her bike, on horseback, cheering with the squad, swinging the bat. She waved back at me in the photos of herself in her party clothes, ready to go to a dance, and from the back hood of the convertible next to the Grand Marshall. In every one of those photographs, her hand is raised in a short wave and her mouth open in a wide, happy smile.

The summer she was thirteen, Anne wanted to go to Girl Scout camp. Her mother quailed a bit, wavered, and worried out loud. Anne persisted, explained, cajoled, pressed, begged, maybe even stomped a braced foot, and promised everything would be fine, promised she would be fine.

It was a promise, through no fault of her own, she could not keep.

The second night at camp, Anne suffered a massive stroke. She was rushed to the hospital where she languished for ten days. She did not regain consciousness.

I preached at her funeral, with more things to say than an afternoon would permit. I tried, but failed, to withhold my own tears. At the luncheon afterwards, many stories were told about Anne, some of them near-apocryphal. That didn’t make them any less true, though. We were all convinced that, if she had lived, within the year her mother would have been shelling out money for her daughter to jump out of an airplane – when the air rushed up around her, we were certain her face would have been spread in that crazy-wide grin.

We planted a pink flowering dogwood in Anne’s honor, a gift from her peers in her Sunday school class. For several years it flourished and grew lovely, there by the outdoor chapel, but then it died during a particularly dry summer. Although I’d been gone from the church for some time, the staff hesitated to tell me about the tree, knowing how special she’d been to me.

I tell her story because, although I’ve known many courageous people who have risen above adversity and struggled against many odds, I’ve never known anyone who radiated such personal power and genuine joy. And somehow Anne just being Anne caused you to forget about the crutches or whatever other hardware were her accoutrements for the day, and instead to see the person, the shining lively person who put me to shame in her passion for tasting all there was to taste, and whose urgency I think I understood far sooner than I wanted to admit.

Lately I’ve been thinking of Anne a lot. I found the envelope with her pictures not too long ago, and tears sprang to my eyes just as easily as they did the day she died. Over eight years ago, I moved from Ohio and lost touch with her mother. I hope she’s okay. I hope Erin’s okay. Anne would have been twenty-three this year. I can’t help but wonder what her life would have been like. I can only imagine, given the trajectory she was on, that she would have blazed trails, set records, broken many other hearts, and still would have been looking for more adventures.

Her easy grin and her hand carelessly raised in greeting belied the gritty victories she had under her belt. On days when I want to whine about my aches and pains, I simply try to remember Anne learning to walk, Anne’s twisted limbs insisting the bicycle would yield to her, Anne with her leg braces peeking out from under her cheerleading skirt.

In that picture, my favorite, Anne’s face is bright, her eyes look directly into mine, and her arms are raised in a wide sign of triumph.

Send questions/comments for Rebecca to: comments@aawmag.com. aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 11

the Photo by Sherrie Norris

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Beating Beast

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onnie Norris, well-loved nurse at Watauga County Health Department and multi-talented singer/songwriter/musician with Southern Accent, has safely arrived on the other side of her breast cancer journey.

Did the two-year survivor ever doubt the outcome?

“The best way to answer that is to say I never doubted that God had a special plan for me, whether I would overcome it or leave this world. I was prepared, either way. In the beginning, I asked, ‘Why me?’ but I later found the answer.”

When Connie turned 40, her doctor advised her to have annual mammograms. As a nurse, she knew the importance of that advice.

For the next three years, she followed through with mammograms and monthly self-exams, but soon became distracted with work, helping care for her aging parents and traveling with Southern Accent. Her teenage son needed her, too, as did her husband, who by that time, had been disabled for eight years. Both were always supportive of her other obligations and commitments.

“At 43, I didn’t have time to take care of myself. When tired, I pushed myself to do more, thinking life would settle down and I would get back on track.”

Always doing for others, Connie never imagined needing help for herself. “I considered myself healthy, thinking it wouldn’t hurt to miss a mammogram or two.”

In the meantime, the death of her parents added to her already exhausting physical and emotional load, the grief consuming much of her energy.

12 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Local Nurse Shares Her Journey Through Breast Cancer

By Sherrie Norris

Soon after her father’s death, she realized three years has passed since her last physical; her mammogram was way overdue.

Concerned with prolonged fatigue, Connie scheduled a physical and a mammogram, surprised to learn that that four years had actually passed since her last one. “I had no idea how that happened.”

Her mammogram report indicated abnormalities, but she wasn’t too worried. She knew other women, including her sisters, whose similar reports turned out okay. “I had never even felt a lump during self exams.”

A stereotactic biopsy detected cancer cells - Ductal Carcinoma In Situ, (DCIS), described by her physician as “early cancer and very treatable.”

The tears came, followed by questions. “Why did you let this happen to me, God? What if I have cancer somewhere else and don’t know it yet? What if I die young before my son is grown? What if I never get to enjoy knowing my grandchildren? How will my disabled husband manage without me?”

Searching for strength, she turned to her faith in God, family, and friends. “I know many prayers were spoken on my behalf, some by people I have never even met. During my illness and recovery, I received over 50 cards - some from church groups, signed by people I didn’t know. It was comforting to know that so many people cared for me.”

Upon discussing treatment options with her doctor, Connie was given two choices - a lumpectomy or a mastectomy. “I experienced fear like I have never known before. I

couldn’t have a mastectomy, I just couldn’t! Hadn’t the doctor said ‘early cancer cells?’” She chose the lumpectomy and radiation.

When diagnosed at 46, Connie said most other women she knew with cancer were older. “Then, a friend that I hadn’t seen in a while, came by after my surgery. She reminded me that she had been given the same diagnosis two years earlier. It really helped to talk to her.”

Connie had much confidence in her physician, Dr. Edmisten of Boone, who referred her to a program sponsored by the American Cancer Society. “Reach to Recovery pairs you with someone in your own community who has been through her own breast cancer journey. Barbara Jackson was my wonderful volunteer. We talked on the phone, she offered to meet me at the doctor’s office if I needed her, and she answered questions about own experience.”

Connie’s lumpectomy was scheduled for Sept 5, 2006. It was her husband’s birthday – the same day her father passed away. The pathology report confirmed cancer cells in multiple areas of the removed tissue, but none in the lymph nodes. “I was so thankful, but I still needed radiation to kill any possible lingering cells.”

About two weeks post surgery, Connie signed in at the Seby B. Jones Cancer Center in Boone. “Dr. Mack and staff introduced me to their high - tech world. I was truly in awe!”

Through research, Connie had learned that the cancer center “is as good as any in the larger cities and staffed with the same high quality of professionals.”

“The wonderful staff there took very good care of me during the seven weeks it took for 35 treatments.”

While having healed well from surgery, Connie still lacked energy.

She continued working part-time during treatment, her coworkers a huge support system. Along with others, they prepared meals for Connie’s family, sent cards, flowers, books, etc. “A special co-worker, Sandra Hagler, gave me The Purpose Driven Life Journal that helped me focus on reading scripture and writing about my journey.

It was therapeutic in many ways.When I was too tired to do anything or couldn’t sleep, I wrote.”

On Sept. 30, Connie returned to sing with Southern Accent, “at a little country church” in Wilkes County. Near the end of the service, she mentioned her cancer and requested the congregation’s prayers.

A “life-changing experience” took place for Connie that night as she was surrounded by a group of praying men. “I believe in God’s power to heal, because I had read it in the Bible since childhood. I wanted to claim that healing. At the end of the prayer, I didn’t feel any different physically, but emotionally I felt closer to God.”

On Oct. 13, Connie awoke as usual. “Within the first minute, I knew something was different. I felt more energy, more awake, more alive than I had in six months. I knew that God had answered my prayers. I didn’t have to worry anymore.”

On the day before Thanksgiving, Connie completed her radiation treatments. The ongoing fatigue, identified as a side effect coupled with an aggravating skin irritation, was small, she says, “compared to other cancer patients who had more severe symptoms.”

Two years later, Connie is “cancer free,” according to her last two mammograms and a recent MRI. “I don’t know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future. I am now a better person for having had this experience in my life. I appreciate life more. I value my Lord, family and friends more than ever. And I believe in the power of prayer. I will always be grateful for the support of my family, friends and a great team of health care providers who helped me through this journey.”

What is she doing now to stay healthy? “I eat right, exercise, take multivitamins, rest, have fun – and make sure I get my yearly mammograms and checkups.”

Send questions/comments for Sherrie to: comments@aawmag.com.

Boone Drug would like to recognize Suzie Sharpe, RNCCM for her commitment to improving Public Health through vaccines. As the recipient of the Merck Vaccine Service Award on August 11th, she has established the vaccination clinic at Boone Drug. The clinic exceeds all industry standards and serves to protect our community against disease.

The award was presented by Stacey Wilson, a representative of Merck and Companies Vaccine Infection Disease Division.

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aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 13

Photo by Sherrie Norris

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Local Health System Adds Powerful Tool In Fight For Early Detection of Breast Cancer

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Courtesy of Appalachian Regional Healthcare System

his year in America, more than 212,920 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer. Today, Watauga Medical Center has advanced the fight against this pervasive disease by installing a new, state-of-the-art digital mammography system for its patients.

This GE Healthcare Senographe® Essential Digital Mammography system provides physicians with clear and precise all-digital images, rather than images on X-ray film. What’s more, the system provides the largest field of view currently available, which can be extremely helpful for precision imaging of patients with diverse breast shapes and sizes.

“This is new and powerful technology for the detection of and fight against breast cancer,” said Gillian Baker, Vice President for Marketing and Business Development for Appalachian Regional Healthcare System. “Digital systems such as the new Senographe Essential allow us to offer our patients state-of-the-art mammograms that are faster and easier than ever before. And it gives our referring physicians extremely accurate images to use in diagnosis.”

Mammograms are among the best early detection methods, yet 13 million U.S. women 40 years of age or older have never had a mammogram, according to the National Breast Cancer Foundation, Inc.

There are many advantages to a digital system.The images are clear and easy to read, and the system offers a better view of the breast, especially near the skin line and chest wall. and in women with diverse breast tissue types. The digital image is ready to read within 10 seconds – there is no longer a wait

14 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

for films to be developed to be sure the images are usable.

Digital mammograms take as little as half the time as film. And if a second opinion is needed, the image can be sent electronically to a consulting physician virtually instantaneously.

The Senographe Essential at Watauga Medical Center is equipped with the Seno Advantage 2 Review Workstation®.

This workstation allows physicians to simply, quickly, and easily review patients’ images, including information from multimodality studies, at a single point of review. Physicians have the ability to pull up a patient’s previous mammography for historical comparison or for comparison against other types of images, such as breast ultrasound, resulting in a more comprehensive view of a specific patient’s medical history.

The workstation also simplifies the sharing of information and images to referring physicians and surgeons.

“This new digital technology will provide both high-precision accuracy and increased ease of use for our patients,” said Baker.

“Providing the best diagnostic equipment possible to patients is a vital step to good preventive health, and one we take very seriously. Appalachian Regional Healthcare System is committed to ‘Making Life Better.’”

To schedule a mammogram, call (828) 268-9037. For more information about Appalachian Regional Healthcare System, visit www.apprhs.org.

Send comments or questions about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

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This year in the U.S., more than 200,000 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer. Watauga Medical Center advanced the fight against this pervasive disease by installing a new, state-of-theart digital mammography system for its patients.

The GE Healthcare Senographe® Essential provides: • Quicker exams with fewer retakes.

• Crystal-Clear Detail. Obtains precision images of diverse breast shapes and sizes.

• Images stored and shared electronically.

Digital images maintain integrity and can be shared and reviewed simultaneously in multiple locations, if required.

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“Early detection is key.

Digital Mammography is now available to me in the High Country.” aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 15

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Keeping Kim Close To Heart Sisters Share Story Of Loved One Lost To Breast Cancer

By Sherrie Norris

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isters Tammy Dunnigan and Kelly Gilliam of Boone vow never to miss their annual mammograms and encourage other women to do the same.

Primarily, they want to stay healthy for their families and each other, but a significant reason behind their commitments is that their sister, Kim Whitman, died at the age of 42 from breast cancer.

“Kim had a complete physical one year to the day before she was diagnosed, including a mammogram that showed nothing,” Kelly stated. “Within in a year, she had developed breast cancer and it had spread to the bone.”

Kim’s young daughter, Kathryn, was three years old when her mother died, Tammy said. “Kim was diagnosed when she was 40. Looking back on it now, we remember that she had trouble breastfeeding Kathryn.That was probably the beginning of the end and we just didn’t know it.”

Kim’s sisters remember her fondly, tears mixing with smiles each time they recall the example she was to each member of their family and to everyone she met along the way. “Kim was a very strong Christian woman, the minister of music at a large church in Birmingham, Alabama where she performed every Sunday. She didn’t have time, she told us, to get checked out.When she began having a lot of pain, she just thought she was just getting old.

“On Sunday, around the first of July, a doctor who attended her church asked her if she was okay and suggested she have some tests, which she did. By that same evening, she was beginning radiation – her cancer had already metastasized to the bone.”

At the time,Tammy remembered, her family was at the beach. “Kim waited until after everyone got back before she told our family. She battled the cancer for over two years and died a day after her birthday in November.”

16 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Kim Whitman’s life was not in vain. Before her death from breast cancer just a day after her 42nd birthday, her sisters promised to take good care of themselves and not to miss annual exams and mammograms.

Kelly said, “Thankfully, Kim lived life to the fullest. It just happened, for some reason we may never know, that cancer became a part of her life. Cancer was not who Kim was and it did not define her. She did not let it ruin anything about her or her life. In fact, she did not even give it enough credit to speak much about it. She kept living.”

Kelly added, “There is one big thing that I learned from Kim’s experience and what our family has gone through - cancer is not prejudiced and no one is immune to it. Never in a million years did I think that it would take my sister. She was my hero - not for who she was, but because of how she lived.

She was the most faithful person I knew and she did all the right things to stay healthy and had regular checkups.”

Tammy stated, “Kim was as close to an angel as anyone we’ve ever met. Her faith was tremendous. She could never say anything bad about anybody. She had dark hair, dark eyes and olive skin - such a beautiful person. She could light up a room anytime, day or night. She loved to laugh at herself and the funny things she did.”

Both Tammy and Kelly understandably were very upset when Kim told them about her cancer. “She sent us flowers and told us all was well,” Tammy shared.

For a high school assignment, Tammy’s teenage son, Trey, wrote an essay about his aunt Kim after she died and the close relationship they shared. He remembered the family Christmas party at which time Kim told loved ones that she had just two more months to live and the

call he later made to check on her, when they talked from 7 p.m. ‘til 2 a.m. He remembered her courage and compassion and her determination to live. He remembered how she made everyone laugh, especially the time his mother was demonstrating her new vehicle’s On-Star device. “When the female voice answered on the other end, Aunt Kim asked her for pancakes and sausage.” Trey also referred to the advice she gave him – to never give up, but to learn from his mistakes and never make the same ones twice. She had the same kind of impact on every family member, they all agree.

Tammy remembered that she and Kelly both promised Kim and their mother that they would have annual or bi-annual mammograms - whatever was recommended. “As far as I know, breast cancer was not prevalent in our family and we just didn’t see a need for mammograms. It takes time, you have to make an appointment and we were just always too busy.”

Despite their commitments to eat well, exercise, have annual check-ups and mammograms, these sisters realize doing so does not necessarily mean they will never get cancer.

Both women have recently learned of the new state-of-theart digital mammography system at Watauga Medical Center (see related article on the GE Healthcare Senographe® Essential Digital Mammography system), and plan to utilize it as recommended. Kelly stated, “If these types of resources are available for our use, it is our responsibility to take advantage of every single medical procedure that could possibly save our own lives or the life of someone we know.”

Tammy added, “With the new machine available right here in Boone, women can get in and out very quickly. If it can save one life, it is worth the time and money it takes.”

She said, “We miss Kim so much. I cannot imagine how my mom felt then or how she still feels now over losing a daughter.

We still keep in touch with Marcus, Kim’s husband, and we get to see them at least twice a year. Kathryn just left us after visiting for several weeks.”

Kelly concluded, “We appreciate this opportunity to share our thoughts about our sister, Kim. It is a true honor to speak about her and, hopefully, something we have said here about her experience and her example will be a help to someone else.”

Send questions or comments for Sherrie to: comments@aawmag.com.

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According to the American Cancer Society, breast cancer is the most common and the second deadliest cancer in women in the U.S. An estimated 40,460 women will die of breast cancer this year, and about two million women living in the U.S. have been treated for breast cancer. A woman’s risk of developing invasive breast cancer at some time during her lifetime is one in eight; the risk increasing with age.

Key Facts To Keep In Mind: 1. The five-year relative survival rate for localized breast cancer has increased from 72 percent in the 1940s to 98 percent today. If the cancer has spread regionally, however, the rate is 81 percent, and for women with cancer that has spread to distant parts of the body, the rate is 26 percent.

2. Survival after a diagnosis of breast cancer continues to decline beyond five years. Ten-year survival and beyond is also stage-dependent, with the best survival observed in women with earlystage disease.

3. Well-known estrogen-related risks for developing breast cancer include early menstruation (at age 12 or younger); late menopause (after age 55); and no full-term pregnancy or first child after age 30.

18 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Clipart.com image

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Know The Facts 4. More than 80 percent of biopsied breast abnormalities are noncancerous, but any breast lump must be evaluated by a physician. New, less invasive biopsy procedures permit removal of breast tissue in a physician or radiologist’s office.

5. Sometimes more than one mammogram may be necessary to evaluate an abnormality. Common reasons for additional mammograms include film views that are unclear and/or different views requested by the radiologist.

6. Some mammography centers are able to provide immediate interpretation of your mammogram. This service can help prevent anxiety caused by waiting days to hear your results. Any additional films required also can be taken during the same visit.

7. The annual risk of a 70-year-old woman being diagnosed with breast cancer in the next 10 years is two to three times that of a 40-year-old woman, and she has about four times the risk of dying from breast cancer in the next 10 years.

8. Some breast cancer cases are the result of a mutation in the BRCA 1 or 2 genes, which can be inherited from a family member. Hereditary breast cancer makes up approximately five to 10 percent of all breast cancer. Some altered genes related to breast cancer are more common in certain ethnic groups.

Women who have an altered gene related to breast cancer and who have had breast cancer in one breast have an increased risk of developing breast cancer in the other breast. These women also have an increased risk of developing ovarian cancer, and may have an increased risk of developing other cancers.

9. Different types of treatment are available for patients with breast cancer. Some treatments are standard, and some are being tested in clinical trials.

The four types of standard treatment currently used are surgery, radiation therapy, chemotherapy, and hormone therapy.

See the American Cancer Society’s Web site, www.cancer.org, for more information

Who’s At Risk?

The risk of a woman having breast cancer is higher if: she has a personal firstdegree (mother, sister) family history, and/or if she had radiation to the chest between the ages of 10 and 30.

Her risk is somewhat higher if: she never had children or had her first baby after age 30, has used hormone therapy for a long time, she smokes, drinks heavily or is obese.

Send questions or comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 19

Photo by Mark Mitchell

Recovery House: It’s Not Easy Street

By Yozette “Yogi” Collins

S

Pictured from left, Lori Watts, Joan Zimmerman and Jocelyne Topper.

truggle and challenge precede any victory and it is those things that make victory so sweet. Michael Phelps didn’t chill out at the pool in floaties before his record-breaking Olympics; he worked, ached and set aside his junk food cravings. He also had support along the way in the form of coaching and family.

The Family Solutions program, under the umbrella of New River Behavioral Healthcare, is a combination coach/sideline support for families recovering from substance abuse and addiction.The program, launched five years ago, takes a groundbreaking approach to treatment and recovery by focusing on the whole family rather than just the client. While the program is a great service and success, Joan Zimmerman, a Licensed Clinical Therapist with Family Solutions, remembers there was an element missing. “After two years running Family Solutions it became clear there was a huge need in the community, particularly with single mothers who were having terrible problems staying clean in their own environments. They needed to be able to go somewhere different to do different things and there was nowhere to go.We were finding ourselves sending them outside this community.” That is when the idea for Recovery House formed.

Recovery House is, like Family Solutions, funded by grants and charities like the High Country Women’s Fund and is an incredible resource for women in our area. Women living in the house must participate in an intensive treatment program that includes nightly meetings, parenting classes and general living skills training.The house is not a treatment facility; rather, it is a housing program with the goal 20 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

of transitioning clients to independent housing and self-sufficiency in approximately a year.

It is not Easy Street, Joan says. “Most of the women who apply for the house are in very early recovery and that is a really, really difficult place to be. In some ways, we ask a lot of them to be able to get a job and pay rent and be at these meetings every single day. It’s such a night and day shift. In some ways, it sounds like we’re providing all this stuff for them, and we are, but it doesn’t mean it’s easy for them.

It’s really, really hard.” And, if there are kids living with their mother in the house, Joan adds,“it’s hard to be a parent and be in early recovery at the same time.”

Jocelyne Topper, Community Support Specialist for Recovery House, works so closely with the women in the house that the staff jokes she should just move in. “I work with them specifically on finding employment, working on transportation needs, dealing with the practical day-to-day life. I just opened an office in the house to have more on-site presence to help with developing resumes. We work with Department of Social Services in reunifying with their children, so when they are in the house it doesn’t necessarily mean they have their kids with them right then, but they could be working with Child Protective Services to reunify with their kids, so we work on that.”

Client confidentiality is of utmost importance to the staff, but one woman currently living in the house wanted to share her story.

Jennifer has been in the house for four months and is thankful for the house and the program.“The fortunate thing for me, as a woman,

is there are so many things offered in this community. I don’t think there are so many opportunities for a man as for a woman. I am so blessed to have been able to have finally come clean and to realize what is important in my life, who is important, and what I should be doing.”

Jennifer grew up in a loving, supportive family, went to college, married, had three kids in as many years, had a big house on five acres, two cars and a small family-owned business; life seemed good.

Then, two years ago, her husband accidentally drove his truck over their one-year-old daughter, Evelyn. Jennifer hit a breaking point. “I saw my daughter lying there on the driveway. I ran over and picked her up and she died in my arms. It happened in front of all the kids.

From that day forward my husband and I haven’t been the same. I started using [cocaine] almost immediately.” Though she had used cocaine before “recreationally,” Jennifer says, “It [cocaine] is always a problem, but it hadn’t controlled my life to my jobs and homes or anything like that. But it started festering into that after Evelyn.”

Following a series of other unfortunate and some fortunate events, Jennifer is living in the house while recovering from substance abuse and working to regain custody of her son and daughter who now live with a foster family in the area. Asked why she hadn’t allowed her parents, who still live in Jennifer’s New York hometown, to adopt the kids so that she could live in the same house as them, Jennifer replies, “I had to make the hardest decision to send my kids to foster care instead of my parents’ house. In foster care, I’d be able to see them. But, if I lived in New York, I worry I would fall into old temptations with old friends.” Still, the fact that her kids do not live with her now breaks her heart and motivates her recovery. And, since her husband isn’t as focused on recovery as she is, Jennifer has separated from him. “It’s extremely hard to walk away from someone you have a lot of history and children with. But, my kids need their mother and I need to totally focus on mending that and it’s gonna take a long time. I just thank God I’m 30 years old and learning this stuff and not 60 years old.”

Ultimately, Lori Watts, the Housing Coordinator for Family Solutions who also handles the vital task of writing grants, sums up the focus of her job by saying, “It’s good to see people’s lives change for the better.”

Send questions/comments for Yogi to: comments@aawmag. com.

For more information on the Family Solutions Recovery Program, please call

828-268-0220

273 Boone Heights Drive,

Adjacent to the Wellness Center

Open 7 Days A Week

262-5592

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Celebrating 26 years

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Breaking the Stained Glass

By Corrinne Loucks

“Our mission is to inspire positive change in our world as we are led by Christ’s example of love, compassion, and acceptance of all people.”

“Never place a period where God has placed a comma,” is a quote from Gracie Allen, a favorite 20th century American comedian, and an inspiring motto lived up to at High Country United Church of Christ (HCUCC) in Boone.

With her church joyously and victoriously celebrating its sixth year as a congregation, the Reverend Dr. Shelly Wilson has a gleam in her eye as she passionately describes her church as a non-denominational, all-inclusive environment where everyone has a voice. She acclaims the climate as relational, not hierarchical - a place where men, women and children all are heard, thereby cultivating intimacy and embracing their unique and collective enthusiasm, passion, anger and sorrows in a healthy way with no shame or judgement.

The church’s mission states: “We come together as High Country United Church to create a safe, loving environment, to discover and cultivate spiritual growth, and to establish community by reflecting and celebrating God’s love.

“Our mission is to inspire positive change in our world as we are led by Christ’s example of love, compassion, and acceptance of all people.”

Born and reared in Boone, Shelly, single mom to 13-year-old Julianna Wilson Bond, is a cycler, reader, writer, hiker and world traveler, who has a great respect and love for her home and for the leadership that helped her evolve into her current position in the community today.

She grew up attending First Baptist of Boone on King Street and was highly encouraged by her family and her pastor to express her spirituality and beliefs. Shelly described having a love for God and God’s word from an early age, knowing that she wanted to be a minister since she was a little girl. Having this desire nurtured and supported led Shelly to become the first female to be ordained as a pastor at First Baptist in 1985 - nothing to sneeze at during a time when women were being suppressed in many areas, including the ministry.

Shelly believes that all of God’s people may be “called” equally and quotes several Biblical scriptures explaining this principle. “The idea of feminism got a bad name and really is a word that means unity, freedom from what holds us back, and embracing who we really are as women.”

This definition did not save her, however, from the opinions of others throughout her career who declared such things as, “You can’t celebrate communion because Jesus was a man and you’re not,” or hearing, after a powerful sermon, “That was a nice little talk, honey!”

Shelly described how many women activists throughout the “feminist movement” felt angry because they had to prove who they were by 22 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

doing a good job. But, she says, everyone has to do that – even men.

More importantly, is to live lives of integrity and to claim our values – which to Reverend Shelly means being inclusive, tolerant and loving to all others.

If proof really is in the pudding, Shelly has all the ingredients. Earning first a BS degree in English from Appalachian State University, Shelly went on to do graduate studies in Anglo- Irish literature at United College in Dublin, Ireland. She earned a Masters in Religious Education from Southeastern Theological Seminary in Wake Forest, a Masters in Theology from Duke Divinity School in Durham and a Doctor of Ministry from Wesley Theological Seminary in Washington, DC. “As a matter of fact,” she stated, “over half of the students in today’s Protestant seminaries are women.”

Shelly quipped that at a time when the movement coined the term “the glass ceiling,” to describe being held back from promotions in the business world, women in seminary were inclined to “break the stained glass ceiling.” But women in the clergy are not, and were not at that time, anything new. In as early as 1853, a woman named Antoinette Brown was the first woman to be ordained (by man) into the ministry.

Proudly, the High Country has embraced women in ministry of various denominations: Cynthia K. R. Banks as Reverend of St. Luke’s Episcopal Church in Boone; Grace Lutheran’s Associate Pastor Sarah Lang; Marianne Romanant, pastor of FaithBridge United Methodist Church of Blowing Rock; and Reverend Melanie Childers, chaplain at Watauga Medical Center, to name a few.

A pastor for 28 years, Shelly said she has changed denominations in search of one that is inclusive of all people. Even though she was ordained as a Southern Baptist, the church did not at allow women to serve as pastors at that time and Shelly became United Methodist.Though women were allowed to serve there, other people were not, so Shelly chose United Church of Christ, a denomination she said conveys “No matter who you are or where you are on life’s journey, you are welcome here.”

Shelly uses the symbolism of a round table to describe High Country United Church of Christ’s environment.“A round table has a place for everyone - a place where all of the chairs are of equal height and will be slid over so a wheel chair can get in.” On the other side of those welcomed “in,” HCUCC has a huge heart for community and for what it can send flowing “out.”

On this third anniversary of Hurricane Katrina, members are making their sixth trip to New Orleans to offer continuing aid to its victims. The

church’s youth group has a strong initiative to feed inner-city and local impoverished families, and is growing an organic vegetable garden for supplies. Members are volunteers with Habitat for Humanity and have procured thousands of dollars’ worth of food and medicines for Watauga’s Hunger Coalition. Behind the church appears to be a lumberyard. The church has cut and stored wood to meet heat/ fuel needs of local families throughout the coming winter months.

United Church of Christ has been around since 1957.Their national Web site (UCC.org) says they are a “party” church! “God is having a party and we are all invited. At God’s party, our spiritual hungering is fed and our thirsting is satisfied. At God’s party, we get strength, stamina and community support that help us through the tough times that come to everyone.That’s why we need friends and companions and not judges (no offense to judges) for the journey.” John: 17 reads, “That they may all be one.”

Dr. Shelly Wilson and her church body faithfully adhere to their words of welcome from the home page of their Web site,“All persons are welcomed and celebrated, without regard to race, social status, religious belief/practice or lack thereof, gender, physical condition/appearance, or sexual orientation.Welcome to the United Church of Christ—a community of faith that seeks to respond to the Gospel of Jesus Christ in word and deed.” Mission accomplished, every day.

Shelly can be contacted by calling the church office at (828) 297-1092, 8233 Highway 421-N Vilas, North Carolina 28692 or via e-mail at pastor@highcountryucc.org.

Send questions/comments for Corrinne to: comments@aawmag.com.

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AAW Magazine would like to recognize and honor women in the clergy for the month of October, National Clergy Month (NCM). Thanks to Shelly Wilson for her kindness and “outpouring” to our High Country community.

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All About Crafts| By Nancy Morrison

BOO Lady Pot serves up treats forHalloween

When the ghosts and goblins come calling on Halloween, greet them with this BOO LADY that can serve up treats all the scary night long. What? How can we tell this pot is a lady?

Well, look at the eyelashes and—hey—it’s All About Women, so OF COURSE she’s a lady!

Materials needed: 1. Terra cotta pot (12 inch measured across top shown here, but any size will work--matching saucer is optional) 2. Acrylic paint in orange, pink, and black (Patio Paint sold at Wal-Mart and Michael’s will work) 3. Permanent paint markers in black and white (Garden Craft markers work well) 4. Graphite paper (also pattern transfer paper from sewing dept. works) 5. Clear spray varnish (gloss or satin—your preference) 6. Disposable foam brushes in assorted sizes A new pot is suggested because it is hard to really clean a used pot. Lightly apply sandpaper to any rough spots on the terra cotta and wipe well.

With the orange paint and a disposable brush, coat the outside of the pot, including the bottom but not the rim. If coverage is not complete, a second coat can be applied as soon as the first coat is dry. (Don’t forget the inside of the drainage hole.)

When the outside is dry, paint the inside of the pot and the outside rim black. If you have a saucer, paint it black.

24 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

When all paint is dry, use graphite or transfer paper to transfer the face pattern to your pot. Use the same method to transfer the “BOOs” around the outside rim.

Then get out your paint markers and have fun. If you make a mistake (or color outside the lines!), no problem. Just cover it up with orange or black and carry on. It is easier to paint the areas of white and pink first and then outline them with black after the paint is dry.

Let the pot dry for 24 hours and then coat with a clear spray varnish for a protective finish. Spray the inside and the rim first and let dry. Then upend the pot and spray the bottom (again, don’t forget the hole) and the outside. One coat will do, but more can be applied. Follow directions on the spray can about drying time between coats. (Don’t forget to spray your saucer.)

If you choose to use your BOO LADY POT as a pot for a plant around Halloween, be sure to use several protective coats of varnish or terra cotta pot sealer sold in craft stores so water won’t seep through and destroy your artwork. Putting the plant in a slightly smaller plastic pot and slipping that pot down into your BOO LADY POT is recommended.

Careful storage after the season will keep your BOO LADY POT ready to serve up Halloween treats for years to come.

Send questions or comments for Nancy to: comments@aawmag.com.

Patterns to trace for your own BOO Pot:

aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 25

guys of all ages will soon be hitting the streets or opening their doors for a special treat, attired in “stranger than usual” apparel of every description.

Friday, October 31 is Halloween. Major retailers indicate that Halloween has seen a resurgence in popularity in recent years among adults who are excited about stepping out of their routine for a little while, buying and renting more costumes and party favors than ever before.

According to Halloween Online Magazine, adults are practically “taking over” Halloween, and the trend isn’t just spooky, but fun and alluring, as well.

While the younger set might not be allowed to wear costumes until after school, most can’t wait to get home to don their favorite super hero or fairy tale princess costume and quickly wait for the veil of darkness to descend upon the neighborhood.Then, the fun begins!

Costumed adults, seen more often these days in the workplace, often seek out their own entertainment later in the evening at masquerade parties and other special events.

Among today’s most popular adult costumes, the “classics” of yesterday still reign - including the “wicked” witch, or the sultry persona of the Queen of Halloween herself, Elvira, Mistress of the Dark – or the likes of Elvis in his black and white stripes, reminiscent of the “Jailhouse Rock” days.

For those individuals who are “normally restrained,” Halloween invites an opportunity to let loose a little, to get spooky, wild, wicked, or even naughty - without judgment.

This is the one day a year where almost anything goes, so exercise your chance to live out a fantasy, to be as spooky or silly as you want to be.

At the same time, many individuals, and especially parents, prefer to take the “tamer” route toward attending “alternative” celebrations that are popping up everywhere these days, hosted by various community groups, schools and churches. Check local media listings for more information on these and other related events. Many of these festivities do not promote scary costumes that frighten the kids, but rather provide safe, fun-filled indoor party atmospheres for all ages to enjoy together.

26 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Clipart.com image

“Ghouls”and

Halloween in the

High Country A few safety tips from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission to help protect you, your children and guests this Halloween.

Treats: Warn children not to eat any treats before Choosing Safe Houses: Children should go an adult has carefully examined them for evidence of tampering.

Flame Resistant Costumes: When purchasing a costume, masks, beards, and wigs, look for the label “flame resistant.” Although this label does not mean these items won’t catch fire, it does indicate the items will resist burning and should extinguish quickly once removed from the ignition source. To minimize the risk of contact with candles or other sources of ignition, avoid costumes made with flimsy materials and outfits with big, baggy sleeves or billowing skirts.

Costume Designs: Purchase or make costumes that are light and bright enough to be clearly visible to motorists.

1. For greater visibility during dusk and darkness, decorate or trim costumes with reflective tape that will glow in the beam of a car’s headlights. Bags or sacks should also be light-colored or decorated with reflective tape, usually available in hardware, bicycle, and sporting goods stores.

2. To easily see and be seen, children should also carry flashlights.

3. Costumes should be short enough to prevent children from tripping and falling.

4. Children should wear well-fitting, sturdy shoes.

Mom’s high heels are not a good idea for safe walking.

5. Hats and scarves should be tied securely to prevent them from slipping over children’s eyes.

6. Apply a natural mask of cosmetics rather than have a child wear a loose-fitting mask that might restrict breathing or obscure vision. If a mask is used, however, make sure it fits securely and has eyeholes large enough to allow full vision.

7. Swords, knives, and similar costume accessories should be of soft and flexible material.

only to homes where the residents are known and have outside lights on as a sign of welcome.

•Children should not enter homes or apartments unless accompanied by an adult.

•People expecting trick-or-treaters should remove anything that could be an obstacle from lawns, steps and porches. Candlelit jack-o’-lanterns should be kept away from landings and doorsteps where costumes could brush against the flame. Indoor jack-o’-lanterns should be kept away from curtains, decorations, and other furnishings that could be ignited.

•If using dry ice in a punch bowl, make sure that the person serving keeps any dry ice chips out of drinks!

It can cause severe injury if ingested.

•If hosting your party in your house, make sure that you move any breakable pieces of furniture or knick-knacks to another room where they can’t get broken. A forgotten heirloom vase that hits the floor could your night.

•To keep things moving for either an adult party or child’s party, make sure that games, like a scavenger hunt or a murder mystery, are planned in advance.

•If you are planning a party for your kids and their friends, see if some of the other mothers will help with the planning, baking and etc. Make it a block party!

•Have the kids whip up a batch of Halloween cupcakes the day before. Any treats or party food that can be made in advance will always be a big help!

•Have a pumpkin-carving party on the night or two before Halloween. Adults and kids can have a wonderful time together and you will get all your Pedestrian Safety: Young children should pumpkins carved at the same time! always be accompanied by an adult or an older, re- •Set up a table with treats, punch and refreshments sponsible child. All children should WALK, not run in your front yard if you live in a small neighborhood. from house to house and use the sidewalk if available, Invite the children and their parents to stop by. rather than walk in the street. Children should be Make sure you set up a nice yard haunt, too! cautioned against running out from between parked cars, or across lawns and yards where ornaments, fur- Send comments, questions or drop us a scary note to: comments@aawmag.com niture, or clotheslines present dangers.

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PowerInThePurse - Here’s Proof: Event co-chair Marianne Hall shares a special moment with audience. (above).

Approximately 400 women, representing every walk of life in the High Country, attended the Third Annual Power of the Purse Luncheon on Friday, September 12 at The Broyhill Inn and Conference Center in Boone, sponsored by the High Country Women’s Fund. Following the luncheon,“powerful” testimonies were shared by three young women whose lives have recently been turned around.Thanks in large part to the HCWF, its partnering agencies and the women working therein, the trio shared how each of their individual journeys to success would not have been possible without Power of the Purse.

Created in May 2006, the HCWF, an initiative of the High Country United Way, is a “giving circle” of caring and committed women who sincerely want to help other women move toward self-sufficiency.The money they raise though events such as POP help support Avery and Watauga Country women in need through funding and service projects in many critically needed areas such as transportation, childcare, education, housing, personal needs, prevention, etc.

Jane Lentz, Financial Aid Counselor at Caldwell Community College, smiles in response to Brittany Poe’s story of success.

The Power of Their Stories••• Brittany Poe:

“My journey of motherhood started at 16 when I was a senior in high school. Despite the fact that I gave birth to a child at a young age, I graduated high school with my class. Three years ago, I decided to attend Caldwell Community College, where I met Jane Lentz, my financial aid counselor. I was working two jobs and caring for my child who had severe medical problems requiring long trips to Duke Medical Center and sometimes days and nights at the hospital. The doctors believed that my son’s MRSA might have affected his bones and his heart. One year after starting college, I came to my breaking point. The stress of school, work and caring for a sick child had taken its toll. The first person I went to see was Jane, who at this point was not only my advisor, but also my greatest source of inspiration. She assured me that I could make it through. At times when I felt I had nowhere to turn, I would call or go see her and she would help me get through another day. Jane and I sat down in her office and tried to find a way for me to add to my income and not be overworked. Jane arranged financial assistance for me through the High Country Women’s Fund. I was awarded a scholarship, which helped me with unmet needs.

I was receiving Pell Grants, which paid for books and tuition, but did not cover day-to-day living expenses, such as gas and medical. She also suggested that I try a work-study job at WAMY Community Action. This is where I met other women who continue to make a difference in my life.Thanks to the help of High Country Women’s fund and WAMY, I am able to focus less on financial stresses and more on my goals and responsibilities. Thanks to the strong women in my life, I stand before you a graduate of Caldwell Community College and student of Appalachian State University. Without your support, love, guidance, and financial assistance, I fear my goals and dreams would be out of reach.”

I am Cursty McLean

and would not be here today without the support of Parents as Teachers and The Women’s Fund.

I am 18 and I have 2 beautiful boys 2 ½ and 1 ½ .

My mom was 14 when she had my sister, 15 when she had me. She was so young she was not ready to become a mom yet so my grandmother raised us for Robin Triplett, coordinator for Parents as most of our lives. When I became Teachers program with Watauga County pregnant and dropped out of Children’s Council, introduces Cursty school, I did not have very much McLean, one of three young women sharing her personal journey during POP luncheon. support from my family so when I met Robin, coordinator for the Parents as Teachers program, she was really like a mom to me. She taught me how to be a better mom to Jason and Levi and has helped me through many hard decisions.

28 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Since I was a young girl, I have always wanted to work at Watauga Medical Center. When I had my boys there, I really appreciated the nursing staff and the doctors. I want to be a RN in the birthing center to give back some of what I got from my experiences.

I love my children, but sometimes I imagine what my life might have been like. I would be graduating this year and right now preparing to go to college to for my nursing degree.

I have now graduated with my GED and am currently in a CNA program.

I will graduate the first week of October. I hope to work for about a year as a CNA, then enroll in school to begin the process to become a registered nurse.

I am halfway to my dream. This would not have been possible without Robin coming to pick me up and taking me home each day or without the child care provide by the Women’s Fund during GED program.

I want to be a good mom to my kids and I know that I am already on the right path.

Diane Mazza-Costa:

Angie Miller, director

“I relocated to the of WAMY Community Action, continues to High Country after leaving stand by Diane Mazza, an unhealthy marriage with through her journey. three small children. I had been a stay-at-home mom and had few marketable job skills.

After a few years, I remarried but continued to see financial strain, and realized one of us had to do something different. So, I said to myself,“Self, in four years you can be doing the same thing you are doing now or you can do something different, but either way you will be four years older.” At that point my husband and I started on new journeys. He took his to Florida with another woman. Mine took me to ASU at the age of 40, as a mother of three and grandmother of one.This was a very scary and intimidating venture for me. I knew I had to finish what I started for my family to rise above poverty.

I also knew I had to set an example for my children about the importance of an education.

They saw me struggle, both emotionally and finacially, to get through. I attended school fulltime, worked three jobs, was heavily involved in six honor societies, and stayed up all night doing homework. I started an organization on campus for non-traditional students (NTSO), to give me the support I needed to get through. Many times my children helped me, especially with my algebra.

We shared many tears during this time, as I feared I could go no further, but we got through it as a family.

I reached a point where I had to bury my pride and ask for help. This was very hard for me because I was raised to believe that was not the thing to do.

I found WAMY. For 3 1/2 years they helped me, both financially and emotionally. They are so much more than a resource center. They are my friends and my family. Colleen has worn many hats for me, mother, counselor, financial advisor, and motivator.

Through my close affiliation with them I was introduced to the High Country Womens Fund. They are a group of women who are blessed fiancially and

have the hearts to give of their time and resources to help others like myself.The HCWF has paid for me to take a graduate class necessary for my career. They sponsored a stress management class, which I was asked to attend, to help me to deal with everyday life. Everyone here has been such a blessing to me.

I would not have been able to be here right now without your generosity.

I am not where I want to be, but I am no longer where I was.

In May 2008, I graduated summa cum laude with a degree in health education, the first in my family to go to a university. I am very proud of my accomplishments and now I have new goals: to be employed in my field and to be sitting on the other side of this podium, paying it forward to the next awesome young woman ready to take on the world.

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

Trish Lanier, MSW, Maternity Coordinator at Appalachian District Health Dept., reacts in surprise when hearing her name as winner of the “Powerful Purse” door prize (left).

Director’s Circle member, Linda Robinson, implores audience to get involved and make a difference (left).

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Watching a powerful video depicting the HCWF’s success, left to right: Margaret “Pinky” Hayden, event emcee and member of POP’s Circle of Friends, with POP co-chair Kim Kincaid and Catherine Scantlin, HCWF coordinator. (right).

Founding member of HCWF, Jenny Miller, auctioneer extraordinaire, keeps the momentum going during the exciting POP jewelry auction. (left).

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Heartfelt|By Teri Wiggans

I

am 57 years and counting. My wisdom seemingly has just begun to surface. I have a few enlightened moments where I can distinguish what is important…I mean truly important. I just completed teaching a class called “Believing Is Seeing” over a six-week period to six extraordinary women. Each week I’d prepare my agenda, copy handouts and imagine the hour-long class filled with helpful information to reduce stress, increase confidence, communicate more effectively and create their desired future.

It took me about two weeks to realize that I was not going to complete everything on my agenda as the class began to have a life of its own.

I became frustrated initially. I have been a teacher for much of my life. I am used to setting goals and accomplishing them. I have been a human doer… doing, doing, doing. If I didn’t squeeze every single bit of information I thought these women needed into the six hours I had with them, I might fail them and the organization that was supporting the class.

The women in this class opened my eyes to something entirely different. Yes, I did share many of my tools and techniques and they practiced them, both in the class and at home during the week between classes.The tools provided new perspectives, new choices from which to make decisions and more confidence in manifesting their goals.They created vision boards placing cutout magazine pictures on their boards that represented what they wanted their future to be. One woman saw her vision board as a way to begin claiming victories in life as she overcame old ways of doing things that no longer were beneficial to her.

What turned out to be a new perspective for me was letting go of my focus on squeezing everything into the hour no matter what and listening to where the women were coming from and what they felt was important. I dropped my agenda and opened my heart and listened. I found myself simply radiating love and warmth and joy and gratitude and letting the women create what they needed for themselves. Creating this environment allowed each person to feel safe, confident, warm and loving towards themselves and each of the other women. One of the women even remarked that we weren’t following “the plan.” I heard myself saying, “It doesn’t matter. It is all perfect just as it is.”

So the victory for me was letting go of my agenda of “doing” long enough to recognize the importance of “being” – holding in my heart 30 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

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The Victory of Following My Heart

love, warmth, joy and gratitude. I thank these women from the bottom of my heart for contributing to my wisdom and my victory of helping me to be able to distinguish what is truly important. An unmistakable bond of trust and intimacy was formed that will continue to support us all as we go our different ways.

The last night of the class, we stood in a circle saying our goodbyes.

I looked at each one of them with tears in my eyes and told them that I loved them. In all of my years of teaching, I have never said that to an entire class. One of the women said, “You’re not going to start that now, are you?” She had a tear rolling down her cheek and later said, “All good things must come to an end.”

That is her perspective, her experience. I might have had that same perspective at one time. Now, I don’t believe that all good things must come to an end. For me, this is just a beginning. I am feeling more confident in sharing my love and warmth and joy and gratitude more openly.

I thought I might feel so vulnerable as to melt away or be embarrassed or feel stupid if I shared as openly as I did. Instead, what it gave me was a sense of freedom and peace.

This seems to be one more step in my growth, my wisdom, if you will. Since I moved to Boone four years ago, I have been on a more focused journey of “walking my talk” or “practicing what I preach.” Almost two years ago, Dr. Samuel Williams and I opened the Heartfelt Healing Center, where we share ways to heal the body, mind and spirit through the power of the heart. People have become healthier, yes, and what is most exciting is that we have a heart connection with these beautiful and precious beings.We have expanded our love through them, one by one.

The class offered me an opportunity to expand even further. I was able to share from my heart with a group of six women that I loved them.

I ask myself, “Who is the real teacher . . . would you please stand up?”

The image that I hold in my head is of a heart - shaped organ extending from my chest, moving ahead of me as I move through life, paving the way, greeting people and situations and events. It is with ease and grace that I can be a human being in this world. I realize that “following my heart” is truly my victory.

Send questions/comments for Teri to: comments@aawmag.com.

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Parenting Page|Courtesy of Watauga Children’s Council

Sending the Right Message (We are thrilled to welcome the helpful advice of the area’s “pros” who deal with parenting issues on a daily basis. The staff of the Watauga County Children’s Council has agreed, through this column, to help us address some of the most common concerns and questions that parents routinely face. The staff hears from countless parents weekly who need help in dealing with difficult situations – some easier to work through than others. Perhaps some of the questions they receive, like the one addressed below, might prove to be a big help to you, as well.)

Last week my daughter and I spent the morning at the library.

The morning was going great until it was time to leave. When I told my daughter that it was time to leave, she ran away when I asked her to come to the door with me. I felt embarrassed because I didn’t know what to do. What can I do if that happens again?

Bewildered mother of a toddler Toddlerhood can be exasperating and thrilling at the same time. Dr. Becky Bailey, creator of Conscious Discipline and recognized worldwide for her expertise in children’s behavior, believes that love unites and fear separates. When toddlers run from us, instead of relying on the fear of abandonment (“If you don’t come by the count of three, I’m leaving without you!”), rely on a child’s love of playfulness. Say, “Where did Melissa go? I have lost her! Is she in my shoe? Up my sleeve? Oh goodness, I’ve lost her!” Pretend to cry and say,“Where could she be?” As the child ap-

proaches and says,“Here I am,” respond by saying,“There you are!” Then, ask the child if she brought her thumb with her. As she shows you her thumb, hold onto it as you walk or carry her out the door.The message sent to the child is, “I care about you and if you were gone, I would be sad.” So, next time you are in the library, or anyplace else this situation arises, try this playful game of looking for your toddler and engaging her (or him) in conversation to facilitate forward movement out the door.

It is the hope of The Children’s Council to have a positive impact on every child in Watauga County. Its mission is to build upon the strengths of children, families, and educators by investing resources, information, and training toward promoting the future health and success of our greatest community asset – our children.

The Children’s Council has been around for almost 30 years and has made great strides in improving relationships, education and advancement in parenting skills through countless programs for children and their parents in Watauga County. Please check out our Web site at www.thechildrenscouncil.org for more information on parenting resources, or give us a call at (828) -262-5424.

The Children’s Council, a High Country United Way partner, has recently moved to the new Family Resource Center located at 225 Birch Street, behind Boone Drug at Deerfield, in the former Boone Pediatrics Office.

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

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All About Women of the High Country Presents...

The Women

Behind the Scenes of

ASU

Mountaineers’ Success Stories by: Sherrie Norris Photos by: Mark Mitchell, Marianne Koch and Sara Golini

By Sherrie Norris

J

ulia Adams is affectionately known as “Mrs. Yosef.” After all, she’s married to “Mr.Yosef,” Gerald Adams, a legend in his own time. However, when you see this distinguished couple strolling about town, they are not hidden behind the mascot that many associate with Yosef. While there is always an air of “Mountaineer spirit” circulating around them – no costumes or head coverings are necessary. However, rarely, if ever, will either be seen sans the black and gold as part of their apparel.

Considered ASU’s “#1 cheerleader,” Julia did in fact wear the school’s uniform with pride while a student at Appalachian State University from 1952-56, where she earned a degree in physical education and social studies. Additionally, she was vice-president of both the Student Government Association and Westminster Fellowship, a member of the Women’s “A” Club, Women’s Athletic Association and Kappa Delta. She was also president of the Varsouvianna Dance Club and secretary of the Modern Dance Club. In 1955 and 1956, she was selected to be in Who’s Who Among Students in American Universities and Colleges.

Two years younger than the football star who many years later became her husband, Julia recalls knowing Gerald in those days, but only as a casual acquaintance. When both graduated from ASU, they went their separate ways with no communication between.

Gerald was hired to coach football in Danville, Va., in 1954, where he also taught and served in administration for many years.

Julia headed to St. Augustine, FL on a train after accepting a high school teaching job over the phone. “I didn’t know a soul there. My first trip to Florida had been when the football team went to play at 34 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Photo by Mark Mitchell

Julie Adams As “Mrs. Yosef” - ASU’s #1 Cheerleader

the University of Tampa. At that time, I thought I’d like to go there after I graduated, so I did.

Julia spent 37 years as an educator in Florida, teaching physical education and health, the last 17 years of her career as the supervisor of health education for the Duval County Public School System in Jacksonville. She also served as a consultant for the U.S. Department of Education’s Drug Free School Program.

In the meantime, her husband and the father of her three children passed away.

In 1993, she returned to ASU for a “black and gold reunion.” Two years earlier, Gerald had returned to Boone upon accepting the job as director of the Yosef Club, the main goal of which is to raise funds for ASU athletic scholarships. His spouse, too, had died after a battle with cancer.

“Gerald and I renewed our friendship Julia Adams as an and began a long-disAS U cheerleader. tance courtship via

Julia’s involvement in all that is ASU is fun, exciting and it keeps her young, as does an active daily regime of exercise and proper nutrition. “You only have one body. It’s very important to me to take good care of myself . . . it does make a difference.” She emphasizes her statement with another quote she uses often, “Good health is everyone’s major source of wealth. Without it, happiness is almost impossible.” She describes “a nutritional diet, along with one’s spiritual life and having time for meditation ”as being “very important to staying grounded.”

“It feels great,’ Julia says, “to be identified with such an amazing university and town and to be able to give back. But, we could never give back as much as Appalachian has given to us. God has really blessed our lives to allow us to be here.”

In addition to ASU, the couple is actively involved at Grace Lutheran Church. Julia also was instrumental in the early success of the Watauga County Alcohol and Drug Council, working closely with Anna Boyce Phillips in organizing such events as Red Ribbon Week, etc. They love to travel and enjoy spending time with their comBlack and gold - all the way to the altar. bined family of six children (three each) and 11 grandchildren, one of airplane and telephone. In 1996, he asked me to marry him.” That whom is a sophomore at ASU this year. As they await the arrival of was the same year Julia received the EVE Woman of the Year Award their first great-grandchild, Julia reflects, “They all get along so well. presented by the Florida Times Union.

It’s a real blessing.”

Later that year, the couple was married in a black and gold cer- Noting “many changes” since she first came to Boone as an emony at Grace Lutheran Church. “We asked everyone to dress in ASU student, Julia remembers Duncan Hall “as a ball field when I black and gold and to wear their dancing shoes. We love to dance!” cheered.” There were three female dorms, two for men. “There was Wedding invitations specified “no gifts,” but guests were asked to no such thing as co-ed dorms back then! make tax-deductible donations to the university for athletics.

Kraut Creek separated the dorms and women were not al Following her return to her alma mater, Julia taught health edu- lowed on the other side. Neither could women ride in cars. And, cation in Appalachian’s Reich College of Education for nine years. we had to be in our dorms by 8 p,m. each night. We could sit in the She was the recipient of the coveted Appalachian Student Govern- parlor ‘til 9, but that was it. As freshmen, we couldn’t even go home ment Association Outstanding Faculty Award in 2001-02 and again in for the first six weeks.”

2003-04.

She recalls congregating “in the girls’ gym where we had a juke Julia Adams has a lengthy record of service to the university. box. We had a great time and really got to know each other. We had She served as president of the Appalachian Alumni Association from wonderful professors, too, who really cared about us.” The cafeteria 2001-02, vice president from 2000-01 and secretary from 1999- served “really good food.”

2000.

She remembers Bill’s Diner as “one of the few places to eat” off

As president, she was an ex officio member of Appalachian’s campus.

Board of Trustees and the Appalachian State University Foundation.

“The first time I came back to Boone after all those years, evShe also served on the Yosef Advisory Board, the university’s Stra- erything had changed so much, but it’s still a wonderful place to be.” tegic Planning Commission and on the search committee for the Julia expressed her pride in the ASU family as a whole, and especially assistant vice chancellor for alumni affairs. those Mountaineer football players.“They all are just a great group of

She volunteers her time at countless university functions, in- student athletes who have worked very hard to be where they are. cluding homecoming, game day activities, chancellor receptions held We should all be very proud of them.” across the region, and with Yosef Office, Chancellor’s Office and Send questions/comments for Sherrie to: comments@aawmag.com.

McKinney Alumni Center activities. She regularly assists with freshman move-in day, and serves on the High Country Alumni Chapter board.

Julia Adams was described in an ASU publication by past alumni association president William L. Brown as “First and foremost, an outstanding, unselfish ambassador for Appalachian. She is constantly aware of situations that allow her to speak for our university.” Alumnus Alan Brantley echoed Brown’s sentiments. “Julia Adams possesses the qualities of dedication, enthusiasm and service to Appalachian that many aspire to, but few ever accomplish,” he said.

Julia Adams and her husband rarely miss any of ASU’s sporting events – especially the home competitions. “We are very passionate about Appalachian,” she says, right down to their closets. “We don’t have much else to wear except for our black and gold.” From her suits – both professional and casual – to shoes, purses, pendants, earrings, etc., her wardrobe is simply, positively, passionately black and gold. The couple has matching shoes “that get a lot of attention everywhere we go!” She’s also rarely seen, especially at games, without a corsage of two football mums. “I’ve always worn a flower and just this year, began ordering the same for Roseanne (the chancellor’s wife and Julia’s close friend) for the games.”

Mr. and Mrs. Yosef

aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 35

36 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

YOU GO !

GIaRThL reatt Trish

Photo by Mark Mitchell

T

Trisha Threatt, a senior at ASU majoring in healthcare management and marketing, has just begun her fourth year as a member of the university’s All-Girl Cheerleading Team, a “stand-out” in every sense.

“I have been a cheerleader for most of my life and always wanted a career in the healthcare field. Both areas of interest have coincided with who I am naturally. I love to help people and I have a very outgoing personality. Cheering for Appalachian State is one of the best experiences thus far in my life. I have been to all the championship games and was on the travel team to NC State, Michigan, and LSU. I have a passion to represent this school and to represent it well.”

Trisha says she cannot begin to describe “the rush” she gets on game day. “Once I begin to prepare for the game, I get an indescribable excitement and intensity that last the whole day! The feeling is exhilarating!”

According to John Anderson, ASU’s Spirit Program coach, Trisha also is a great leader on the team who motivates others to try their hardest.“Trisha is someone that I am comfortable sending in to talk to alumni and make them feel welcome at events. She just knows how to jump into conversation like you have known her for years. As Trisha starts her senior year, I’m sure she will inspire other cheerleaders on and off our team to work hard and reach their goals in life.”

He further described Trisha as “one of our most talented girls on the team.” Referring to her community involvement, Anderson said Trisha declined an offer to work as a cheerleading instructor this summer so she could work with the hospital.“I wish we had had her around more this summer to practice with the team, but her time needs to be shared.” Anderson added that Trisha excels in the stunting aspect of cheerleading. “She is a great base (she lifts other girls) from her strength to her understanding of the physics involved in stunting.”

Since May 2006, she has been involved with the Universal Cheerleading Association, NC, SC, and TN as Cheerleading Instructor - commuting to different high schools and middle schools in various states - training cheerleading teams to perform difficult routines with precision, choreographing routines to multiple songs and different skill levels, working directly with the audience to increase involvement and participation, and teaching proper techniques and safety.

In January 2006, Trisha was named to the Dean’s List, at which time she also received an athletic honor.

For nearly two years, she has been a member of Future Health Care Executives, a club she said “opens a window of opportunity for health care management majors to make contacts, listen to speakers in the healthcare field, and attend conferences to further our education.”

Trisha not only has a passion for App State, but for the surrounding community

as well. She has been employed part-time at Blowing Rock Hospital since last November as admissions clerk - registering patients in the urgent care center, outpatient clinic, and emergency department, processing lab orders, verifying insurance and collecting fees, etc. She also had the opportunity to complete her internship there and “work with the most wonderful team of executives.”

Trisha said “I have learned so much and have met so many special people. Being around the residents and patients has blessed and humbled my life. It has all helped me to realize that I am meant to work in healthcare.” Soon she will begin volunteering with Hospice. “I am excited about this opportunity, too, as I feel that it is necessary for me to understand the full spectrum of the healthcare industry.”

Working under the leadership of Blowing Rock Hospital’s CEO, Tim Ford, Trisha said her internship was an invaluable experience. “I worked with senior executives from Appalachian Regional Healthcare System and was able to experience all dynamics of a hospital’s operation. I worked on the floor with patients at Watauga Medical Center and Blowing Rock Hospital, and was involved in special events and community efforts, including the fashion show, board meetings, media luncheon, medical staff meetings, activities with residents, etc. “

Ford stated, “In completing her internship with me this summer, Trisha participated in a strategic planning initiative and helped develop a staff paging protocol for emergency situations. She also attended hospital and healthcare system meetings and completed rotations through hospital clinical and support departments. One event that stands out in my mind is when she volunteered and organized other ASU students to help with cleaning up the grounds around the hospital.This was no small task, given we ended up with over 30 large trash bags filled with garbage which had blown in over the winter along the steep bank below the hospital. She has demonstrated compassion for the patients and residents as well organizational skills. She will be a tremendous asset to the health profession in the future.”

Trisha attends church at Cornerstone Summit in Boone, where she is on the hospitality team, helping prepare for special events for the church family and community.

Trisha grew up on a turkey farm in Marshville, sharing her hometown celebrity status with country music’s Randy Travis. “I was raised in a family of four girls and I am the youngest. I have the best older sisters in the world and my parents are my heroes.”

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

Photo by Mark Mitchell

&

Avery Watauga Women on ASU Cheering Squad

A

Avery native, Courtney Henderson and Watauga’s Faith Lyons, are among the energetic ASU cheerleading squad again this year.

Both are thrilled to be a part of this history-making era at Appalachian State University.

A resident of Newland, Courtney is in her third year on the ASU team, having cheered for four years at Avery High. The daughter of Luke and Susie Henderson, Courtney is majoring in Exercise Science with a minor in Biology and Psychology pursuing a career in Physical Therapy. “I love to cheer for App State . . .There is no other experience like interacting with the fans at an ASU game. The total experience makes the 6 a.m. weights and long practices all worthwhile! I am a member of the All-girl cheerleading team and we are looking forward to competition this year with a strong squad. We just started competing again last year and placed first in our national competition in Myrtle Beach, SC. We are really excited to see the results this year of our hard work and dedication. Go App!” Faith made the team as a freshman in 2007, the same year the team took first place in Myrtle Beach. “My favorite part of cheering is stunting and formations.”

She was a member of Watauga High’s varsity cheerleading squad and an award-winning local and state gymnast since elementary school. She attended numerous gymnastics camps, has met Dominque Moceanu, Shannon Miller, and other Olympic gymnasts, and was inspired by the USA team’s accomplishments in the ‘96 Olympics. With plans to ultimately purse a graduate degree in Exercise Science, Faith is majoring in Health Promotion, with hopes of becoming a personal trainer at a wellness/fitness center. Her mother, Reneé Critcher Lyons, is a part-time faculty member with ASU’s Library Science Program and a librarian at Caldwell Community College.

Part of Faith’s ASU pride stems from the example of her great-grandmother, Ethel Mae Hampton Holder, one of the first graduates of Appalachian Teacher’s College, who later taught in a one-room schoolhouse in the Aho community. Other relatives/ASU alum have inspired her, too, including an aunt, uncles, a cousin and her mother who holds both undergraduate and graduate degrees from ASU. Her grandmother Anna Critcher, though she did not attend ASU, “played a major role in my upbringing.”

Cheering For The Champs This year, App State has an All Girl Squad comprised of 24 females and a co-ed squad comprised of 9 couples, both teams always representing themselves at state and national competitions.

They attended and cheered loudly for not only the 2005, 2006, and 2007 Div I AA National Championship Football team’s home and away games, but also the home women’s volleyball games, and men’s and women’s home basketball games.

With strenuous practices three nights a week, strength training twice a week, the team also has optional practices weekly either for stunting on campus or for tumbling at New River Gymnastics Academy in Boone.

Mandatory events for cheerleaders average 7-12 hours per week year round.

The philosophy of the ASU Spirit Program is defined by coach John Anderson, whose focus is on “crowd involvement” at the games. He implores his team members to, “Be the number one fan first, and lead by example. Once you learn how to interact with other fans, then you may add your dance or cheer skills. Simple and clean movements and stunts

Courtney Henderson (left), and Faith Lyons, (right) are happy to represent the High Country as ASU Cheerleaders.

are for leading the crowd. Intricate transitions and pyramids will be left for performances (half-time or competition).Your body is your equipment in dance and cheer so stay healthy and we will be a top program in the nation!”

Squad Benefits: On top of the fun and excitement of being part of the App State Cheerleading family, some of the other “not so obvious reasons” to try out for the squad include: student athlete status, priority class registration, tutor access priority, athletic training room access, strength and conditioning coach access, as well as all students - they do not have to pay for most books since a rental program is utilized.

While the budget covers travel and a food per diem as well as uniforms and practice attire for team members, team members are required to pay for camp and competition fees. However, Anderson adds, numerous fundraising opportunities are available during the year to help each member raise their needed funding – from working cheer clinics, selling calendars during November and December to help raise funds, working at the campus bookstore to collect and hand out books to students at the start and end of each semester, etc.

Point System for Travel and Special Events: Each member of the cheerleading team has a chance to travel to away football games and other special events, based on the accumulation of “points” in various categories such as numbers of years on team/in school, performance, ability, special appearances, conditioning progress, fundraising, grades. etc.

Courtney and Faith are proud to represent their hometowns as ASU cheerleaders!

Send comments/questions about this article to: comments@aawmag.com. aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 37

Food & Entertaining|By Molly Petrey

Tailgating – A New Family Affair

E

Each ASU home game brings an air of excitement to the High Country – the campus teeming with fans from far and wide preparing to cheer on the Mountaineers, festive black and gold tents, flags, and decorations coloring the fields and parking lots.

My family has learned that tailgating is no exception when it comes to the pregame festivities, in what has quickly become one of our favorite pastimes as we join with friends and relatives each Saturday.

My parents, Winston and Karen Petrey, are the founders of “Petrey Tailgating,” as we join with my two brothers, their families, our aunt, uncle, grandparents and cousins. Our tailgating theme for this year is “The Quad Squad,” in honor of App’s quest to capture the fourth national championship.

My aunt Kris and I have planned a different menu for each home game - the one I’m most excited about is the Wofford game on Halloween. We plan to go all out and add a bit of extra creativity, since it’s a special game. My cousins and I plan to dress up for the occasion and, as for each game, we enjoy coming up with fun and different ideas. My mother, Karen, says, “We like variety and try not to have the same thing twice, with everyone contributing a different dish to keep things exciting!”

For homecoming Aunt Kris and I have planned for steaks, baked potatoes, and salad. It’s always a special game and we want to make this tailgate special, as well.

This year, there will be six ASU alumni participating in our tailgate party, but I have to miss it due to a friend’s wedding that day (October 4).

My dad, Winston, our official “grill master” who has earned his title, has been grilling for years, and knows how to grill a steak to perfection.

What started as an occasional get-together with our family, tailgating has turned into an all day Saturday “bonding” event!

We try to reach our designated parking

38 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

spot about four hours before game time, to make sure we have time to set up and enjoy our time together. We have two Appalachian tents and have added a new 16 ft. flagpole (Dad’s idea) on which we proudly display two Appalachian flags. My mother collects decorations throughout the year and tries to add something new each year.

My mother also brings a tablecloth that my sister-in-law, Daphne, made for her – featuring intricate black and gold patterns for the border. “It’s such a beautiful gift, and I love it.” she says.

It’s also a great time to build relationships with fellow Appalachian fans, both locally and those who travel in. “We’ve made many new friends as a result of tailgating.

It’s really neat to see where they are from and what their affiliation with App is.” My mother says.“There is just something about the closeness of fellow fans, it’s something hard to describe, but it’s there, an unspeakable bond.”

It’s really neat when you look all around the campus and see others, celebrating Appalachian football. It’s been such a great experience for me. I always feel a little sad when football season is over.”

Little did our family know that when we started to tailgate it would become not only a new “tradition,” but probably one of the highlights of our year!

After the season is over, our whole family sits around and brainstorms ideas of how to make tailgating better for the coming year.

As a big football fan, I encourage anyone who hasn’t been tailgating to give it a try. All it takes is family or friends and good food. It doesn’t have to be fancy or elaborate, the main point is to have a good time and build closer relationships. Of course if you don’t feel like starting one yourself, you’re more than welcome to come and join ours! Because on gameday, we’re all family!

Send questions/comments to: comments@aawmag.com.

Petrey Family Favorites: Peanut Butter Brownies: Blend together: 3 eggs and 1½ cups sugar Blend: 1 stick margarine and ½ cup peanut butter, add to above and add in 1 1/3 cups self-rising flour 6 oz. pkg. chocolate chips Pour into greased 9 x 13-inch pan and bake a 350 for 30 min.

Ham & Cream Cheese Pinwheels: 8 flour tortillas 8 oz. cream cheese 2 Tbs. dry Ranch dressing mix Sliced deli ham

Combine cream cheese and dressing mix, spread mixture onto flour tortilla; place ham onto tortilla. Roll up and slice into pinwheels.

Potato Salad:

8 medium red potatoes, cubed 4 to 5 hard-cooked eggs, chopped 1 ½ cups mayonnaise 2/3 cup sour cream 3 Tbs. sugar 3 Tbs. cider or red wine vinegar 2 tsp. prepared mustard 1 ½ tsp. minced onion 1 tsp. celery seed Salt and pepper to taste

Place potatoes in a saucepan and cover with water. Cover and bring to a boil; cook until tender, about 15-20 minutes. Drain and cool. Place in a bowl; add eggs. Combine the remaining ingredients; pour over potato mixture and toss to coat. Cover and refrigerate for 6 hours or overnight.

Broccoli Slaw:

Combine: 2 pkg. broccoli slaw mix 1 pkg. Ramen noodles ½ cup sunflower seeds

Dressing: Mix ½ cup vegetable

oil with 3 tsp. white vinegar, 2 tsp. sugar and season mix from noodles. Pour on slaw/noodle mixture when ready to serve.

A POST-GAME TRADITION SINCE 1981

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aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 39

Football 101:

It’s All About Women

T “

Photo by Sherrie Norris

A group of local women enjoying “girls night out” at the recent 5th Annual Football 101. Left to right: Paula Hicks, Assistant Director of ASU Child Development Center, Kathy Huffman, Denise Smith and Lynne Critcher, all employees of Hollar and Greene.

onight’s event serves as the official kick-off for the 2008 Mountain- they all reportedly do!) had every appearance of the greatest-ever “girls’ eer football season and we’re glad that you are here.” night out,” beginning with a fabulous dinner, cocktails (if desired), gift bags, David Jackson, the unforgettable “voice” of the Mountaineers door prizes and a special game-day apparel fashion show, featuring some was not addressing the players and coaches when he spoke those words of the most recognizable faces at ASU – Chancellor Kenneth Peacock, his in mid-August, nor was he addressing the media. Jackson was speaking to lovely wife, Roseanne, the “first lady of football” Margaret Moore, and approximately 160 women in attendance for the 5th many others – including a few of the coaches, support Annual Football 101 at Owens Field House, an event staff, their wives and children. that has become “a major deal” for women who want Lots of laughter and fun were thrown into the mix, in on the action. followed by “break-out” sessions on the real world Even before the football frenzy began to invade the ASU of football, where even then, there was no “time-out” campus and surrounding community with the words from the fun! “national champions” attached, Football 101 was on its “At Football 101, our attendees learn rules, positions way to becoming a sell-out event. and strategies of the game as head coach, Jerry Moore, According to Samantha Stevens, ASU’s assistant and his staff take them in the huddle,” Stevens noted. “ athletics director in charge of marketing and licensing This year, we continued with the accelerated Football and a major player in the success of this event - Football 201 class for returning participants who have attended 101 was developed between the marketing and football for two or more years. Plus, everyone had the opportuoffices “as a way to get our lady fans involved in ASU nity to purchase some of the newest 2008 Appalachian football, and get them psyched for the upcoming season.

State merchandise from the bookstore for the upcomBrook Jones, daughter of We continue to evolve the event each year by changing Coach Dale & Donna Jones ing season.” up the classes, and giving the ladies more opportunities Coordinated each year by Stevens and her marketing to learn different aspects of the game. We started with just a defense and staff, along with Jay Sutton and the football office, Football 101, a “ladiesoffense session, and add new things each year.” only (21 and older) event” takes place each August with a minimal cost for The addition of “new classes,” Stevens describes, includes sessions on a night of fun, entertainment and “education.” strength training, athletic training, on-field activities (physically handling the Pre-registration is required due to limited space and increasing defootball with passing and catching), advanced classes of offense and defense, mand with each year. and a Q & A session with the players.

(If you want to get in on a bit of the ASU action, there may still be time Presented again by Outback Steakhouse and ASU Athletics with addi- to register for the Third Annual Basketball 101 to be held November 6 at tional sponsorship from the University Bookstore, RagApple Lassie, Coca- Holmes Convocation Center. Contact the ASU Sports Marketing office or Cola, RH Barringer and Mast General Store, this year’s Football 101, (as email stevenssm@appstate.edu. )

40 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

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Behind Every Successful Man ...

An Up-Close And Personal Glimpse Into The Lives of ASU Women Behind The Scenes Of Mountaineer Football Roseanne Peacock: ASU’s “First Lady” refers to “the light coming on” when speaking of what national championship status has done for ASU. “Because of what the football team has done with three national championships, the whole university has had a chance to turn its lights on. It’s given us a chance to educate the entire nation about what is going on in this western North Carolina town.

The first year the team won, it was unbelievable. The second year – amazing. The third year, and especially after Michigan, we knew we were making history. Because of the football team, people know who we are and they know how to pronounce our name.”

As wife of ASU’s Chancellor Kenneth Peacock, Roseanne states that the last five years have been an exciting time in their lives “since Ken took the position,” noting especially that the last three years have been a whirlwind of activity for everyone. “We have faculty and students who are easily recognized now as Appalachian State representatives as they travel all over the world through exchange programs.

It has given Ken a real opportunity to educate countless people about the university and all that’s going on here, through interviews with such media outlets as ESPN, USA Today, etc. But, there is so much that people do not know about Boone and Appalachian State University until they actually get here.” Roseanne notes that because of the attention garnered, in large part, by the three-peat status, 15,000 freshman applications arrived to fill the 2774 available spots. “Ken says we have the brightest and most energetic freshman class ever.”

Roseanne says admission qualifications are stringent, as well as the requirements for athletes in order to play sports.

“That sends a flag out to prove that we are about education, first and foremost. The players have to maintain the required GPA. Coach Moore tells his team from the beginning that not everyone will end up playing in the NFL – that they need to focus on their education first. That’s what it’s all about.”

Roseanne and her husband rarely miss a football game, but will be missing a home game this year – “Only because of our son’s wedding!”

On any given game day, the Peacocks can be found, pregame, wandering through the parking lots, visiting with tailgating alumni, students, and their families. “It keeps us connected and we both enjoy the camaraderie with our big family here at Appalachian.” Roseanne has only positive things to say about the athletic department and especially its director, Charlie Cobb – who she says is “definitely in the right seat on the bus,” referring to her husband’s philosophy based on the book, “Good To Great,” of “getting the right people on the bus and in the right seat.

She was happy to learn of this magazine’s effort to spotlight many of the women behind the scenes of the Mountaineers’ success. “Sometimes these women – and especially the coaches wives – are overlooked and deserve to be recognized. They give up as much as anyone does for this team. We are proud of all of them – the coaches, players and their families, the cheerleaders, the band . . . everyone who has a part in the success of ASU.” margaret moore: Margaret Moore, wife of head coach Jerry Moore, is the leading lady in ASU football,“a Godly woman,” as we’ve heard her described more than once, her influence strongly felt throughout the university and surrounding community. Margaret’s role is multi-faceted. One of her most important responsibilities, in addition to wife, mother and grandmother, is role model to the younger coaches’ wives.

“I have always felt that it is very important to associate as closely as possible with our coaching family. The wives support one 42 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

another and the younger ones, especially, spend a lot of time together. We try to get together often and have lunch together. This really helps, especially during the football season.” Left to right, Roseanne Peacock, Lindsay Cobb, Kelly Wiley.

Margaret adds, “I had a wonderful head coach’s wife who was my mentor when Jerry first started coaching. I have tried to follow her example and help our wives to become supportive coaches’ wives. They are a precious group of ladies and deserve much credit. They are such a positive force!”

She adds, “We have all experienced motherhood and this is so hard, especially during football and recruiting seasons. Our husbands are gone a lot, though Jerry wants them to spend as much time as they possibly can with their families. During twoa-day workouts, he allows all of us to join our husbands any evening that we want to and have dinner with them and the team. It is so much fun to see the dads and their children interact with one another. This is a special time for each of us.”

Family is of utmost importance to Margaret Moore, she readily admits.“Jerry and I have three grown children and six grandchildren.

Our oldest son, Chris, is the Mountaineers’ running backs’ coach.

Scott, our middle son, an emergency room physician, lives with his family in Antigo, Wisconsin. Elizabeth, our third, lives in Boone.”

Margaret is proud to be the right-hand woman of Jerry Moore, who in his 46th year of coaching, has just begun his 20th year at ASU in the national spotlight, touted as one of the most successful college football coaches of all times.

Following 15 years as an elementary school teacher, Margaret retired from Blowing Rock Elementary School, though for three years was a highly sought-after substitute.“Last year was my first free year.”

She attends “every single ballgame” and has enjoyed the past few years being able to travel on the bus with the team.

“Before that, I would get in the car and go on my own.”

The only games she has missed in Jerry’s 19 years at ASU were those immediately following the births of two of their six grandchildren, one scheduled simultaneously with her 50th class reunion she attended in Texas, and when the team played Hawaii.

“As for the three national championships - incredible!” she describes. “Jerry has been given so many speaking opportunities and we have met so many nice people along the way. We attended the Emmy Awards in Atlanta where the telecast for ‘Under the Lights’ won an Emmy - which, of course, featured our incredible 2007 season. We also attended the ESPY Awards in Los Angeles where we were nominated for the Biggest Upset. I can’t imagine why the New York Giants won it over us, except that there were a few more New York votes than Boone! We still think we deserved it!”

As for any free time she might have, Margaret spends as much as possible with her husband. She enjoys attending church and related events at Mount Vernon Baptist, where they are members, as well as her personal Bible studies, their grandson’s ballgames, helping transport their granddaughter to dance and gymnastics and babysitting.

“This year, I plan to play golf as much as I can before it gets too cold to play - maybe some of the tension I have during the season will be released on that little white ball!”

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Lindsay Cobb, wife of ASU Athletic Director, Charlie about their experience at Appalachian. These are generally not the Cobb, and mother to son Harrison, age 10, and daughter Bran- stars of the team. They are players with specific stories about their an, age 7, is an assistant coach for the ASU women’s soccer team. own experiences within this family. It is an incredibly touching time A lot has happened in the three short years since her family moved that is a testament to why this ‘family’ has produced champions on to Boone. “Charlie moved to Boone and started his job at ASU right the field and in life, and will continue to do so in years to come.” after the July 4th weekend in 2005. We literally dropped him off here Two days prior to this interview, as Lindsay stood in the middle of on our way back from our annual family beach trip. We spent the day Kidd Brewer Stadium during FanFest, her thoughts returned to that of July 4th getting him settled into his apartment and showing the day in July, 2005. “Looking around at all that has happened, it is simply kids around Boone. One of our first stops was Kidd Brewer Stadium.” amazing and most importantly, it is a tribute to what can happen when Lindsay vividly remembers walkgood people do things the right ing across the field with her family, way - on a consistent basis with “wondering what was in store for ‘family’ at the core of that founus over the next several months dation.” and years.” What happened here Anna Glenn and her husover the next three years “far exband Brad, (wide) receivers’ ceeded any thoughts or dreams coach, and only child Zoey are that we had that day,” she states. entering their fourth football One of the biggest concerns season at ASU. She says,“We got the family shared was whether to ASU just in time to be part her son could adapt “from being of all three national championa lifelong (7 years) Wolfpack Fan ships. I love being a coach’s wife! to a passionate Appalachian Fan.” I grew up as the child of a coach She says it took one trip to Kanand was a coach myself before sas with Charlie and the team in becoming a mother. I enjoy go2005 to put all those concerns to ing to the games and I travel to rest. “It took only one player to almost all of them. I also enjoy get our daughter hooked,” Lindsay the opportunities it brings - godescribes. “In 2005, Zack Johnson ing to Michigan, LSU, coaches’ was a senior receiver who came convention in San Antonio.” over to the house with a group The only downside, Anna of student athletes. After that says, “is that from August night, our daughter Branan spent through December, we don’t get the entire games looking for #10. to spend much time together.

In any ‘go fish’ game, she did not This will be my first season with ask for a #10. Instead, she asked a baby, so since August 1, I have for a Zack Johnson. In fact, one become a single parent. All of of my favorite pictures is a shot Top row, from left, Tracy Moore (Chris), Anna Glenn (Brad) and Summer Elliott (Shawn) the responsibilities at home fall of Zack holding Branan after the Bottom row, from left, Donna Jones (Dale), Margaret Moore (Jerry), Paige Speir (Mark) on me. I’ve definitely learned 2005 National Championship.” and Beth Satterfield (Scott). Not pictured Kelly Wiley (John) to be more independent!”

Lindsay says the Anna sees the coaches’ wives as“all wonderful” with some of them havCobbs “have been treated like family from the beginning.” In ing children that are close in age,“so it helps when I have questions or just fact, she relates, “It was Coach Moore who convinced me need someone to talk to.” And, babysitting is available “if the need arises.” to let Harrison travel to Kansas with the team in 2005.” Anna concludes, “Even though it can be difficult at times and I’m a The majority of the coaching staff and their wives are “all pretty crazy person some days, it is nice knowing that your husband truly young.” Lindsay states, “I think the number of kids has quadrupled in loves what he does and gets up each morning wanting to go to work. the past three years.This makes it a pretty active get-together when we He enjoys every second of what he does and not many people can say are all together.” She agrees with the other wives who say it’s a rare day that about their job.” around the field house when the voice of a child or a baby is not heard. Tracy Moore is the mother of three and married to Chris “This to me is what makes college athletics such a great place to work. Moore, running back coach who is the son of Jerry and Margaret In the fall, many of our kids are in their own activities and I am amazed at Moore. Seventeen years ago,Tracy tells us, Chris started as a volunteer the wives’ ability to juggle their jobs, their kids’ schedules, and their hus- coach and worked his way up to assistant. The couple married five bands’ jobs.And believe me, they are die-hard Appalachian football fans!” years ago and Tracy moved here from Atlanta with daughter Mikalla.

She speaks for the wives, as a whole, when she says,“Margaret Moore When asked how she supports her husband’s role, the team, etc., is an amazing supporter to the coaches’ wives in so many ways and has Tracy makes it sound simple: “Attend as many games as possible, been known to do her share of babysitting when the call comes.” have other coaching families over for cookouts, and love football!”

She adds, “One of the greatest things I see with this program is Like the other wives,Tracy knows to expect the “upset” in family life the fact that Coach Moore and Margaret put family first. Although during football season - no vacation, extra yard work and decreased the season causes great strain on the families in terms of time, the family time even though homework, school events, sporting events for families of the football staff are always welcome at practice, in the the children still go on. She is a great team supporter, feels it’s imoffice, and at games. Many of the wives cook meals for players and portant to “lead by example,” to “be there.” While many hours are they also personally invest in the players that their husbands coach.” consumed by travel time to out-of-town games and commitments, she One of Lindsay’s favorite times in the fall during the last three says it’s still, “So much fun! It’s the way it is, a different lifestyle, but oh, years is Thanksgiving Dinner at the Broyhill. “All the players, their so worth it!” What about the added attention attached to the team’s families, and the coaches’ families gather to celebrate before the first national status? “It is terrific! I love it!” playoff game. Coach Moore has three players stand up and speak Is there life outside of football? “Yes there is; life is what you make it!”

44 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

Beth Satterfield is the wife of quarterback coach

Scott Satterfield and the mother of three children: Bryce (7), Isaac (5), and Alli (4).

Both Scott and Beth were student athletes at ASU. During his senior year, Scott was the quarterback of the ‘95 undefeated team.

Beth ran track and was the ‘95 ASU Most Valuable Player. Scott’s first season coaching for App was ‘98. “This is his 11th season, having coached the wide receivers, running backs, and ASU’s most prolific quarterbacks: Richie Williams, Trey Elder, and Armanti Edwards.”

Beth and the kids do a lot to show their support - attend games, clips articles, go to practices when possible - “even if it means just waving to him on the field” - and eat dinner with him at the training table on Thursdays. “But the most important and effective thing that we do is pray - for the players, the other coaches and their families - and most of all for Daddy.”

Describing the family’s seasonal schedule as “insane,” Beth says, “Trying to get three kids anywhere is always an adventure, especially on game day when our house is always full with friends and relatives. Our family just gets into a flexible routine and as Nike says we ‘just do it.’”

Beth’s mother comes to town to help out on game day and another day during the week to relieve Beth, “so I can go to the grocery store, run errands and, if I’m lucky, I get to go for a run all by myself. It’s frustrating for the children when they don’t get to see Daddy. He’s gone before they get up and frequently isn’t home when it’s time to go to bed. They really miss hanging out with him.”

Although football season is tough, Beth finds recruiting season even tougher. “At least during the season, I know Scott is in Boone.”

From August through February, Beth becomes “the captain of the ship” and hopes Scott will jump on board and join the family whenever he gets a free minute.

“As coaches’ wives, we support each other and count on each other a lot. We accept help from each other whenever it is offered and offer it whenever we can. I love these women - we are all uniquely different. Each has been there and done (or are doing) what I’m doing. They’ve felt the joys, frustrations, and anxieties of being a coach’s wife.”

Beth refers to an “indescribable trust” the women have with one another. “We all have the same goal . . . focus, yet we also know all of this is about more than a football game. It’s our life. It’s personal.

Our entire schedule revolves around the sport. Some people call that a sacrifice, but I don’t see it that way at all. I love being a coach’s wife. It’s just that winning makes life so much more enjoyable.”

The “extended” Satterfield family often includes the team with invitations a few times a month for dinner. “They appreciate a change of scenery and a home-cooked meal, especially the guys who may not get to see their own families very often.”

Beth and her children travel with the team to away games when possible. “The coolest thing to them about away games is getting to watch a movie on the bus. It hasn’t even occurred to them that they are riding with national icons. But if we can’t make the bus, we carpool with the other families.”

The “pace” has definitely picked up over the last three years, Beth admits. “When we go out anywhere in Boone, the conversation ultimately turns to football. Scott gets congratulatory handshakes and high-fives, which I love because it’s just another reminder of the difference my husband has helped make. The “truly shocking” part for Beth is the attention they all receive when in places like California, Florida, Texas and all over the nation. Anytime she goes “off the mountain” wearing her ASU gear, she always gets a nod, a look or a question or two. “I am so proud of my Mountaineers!”

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Summer Elliott is wife of Shawn Elliott, offensive line coach, and mother of two-year-old Maddyn and Max, now four months old.

“Shawn played defensive end for Coach Moore from 1991-1995, graduated in 1996 and came back to coach in 1997.This will be his 12th season coaching but he’s has been at ASU for a total of 17 years.”

Summer played tennis at ASU from 1996 – 2000. The couple met at ASU in 1997 and married in 2001. “When we first got married, it was very difficult being a coaches wife. It took a lot of adjustment.”

Over the years, Summer has “really embraced it and would not trade it for anything.” For her, “football season is such an exciting time of the year, but also very nerve-racking! Your husband’s livelihood is all dependent on winning football games.” It is “an awesome feeling,” she states, to be able to watch her husband at his job. “The passion that Shawn has for what he does is incredible to watch and be a part of. The past three years, three national championships have been amazing, indescribable really. To go from 6-5 in 2004 and not know if you have a job to three national championships is an amazing feat. It is God at work.”

Summer recalls the birth of their first child, Maddyn, in 2006.“I started having contractions the Friday night before the Gardner-Webb game.

Shawn and I went to the hospital at 6 a.m. that Saturday. They sent me home, saying the contractions weren’t close enough. Shawn needed to leave by 2 p.m. to make it to the game. Should he go to the game and possibly miss the birth or stay at home with me? I insisted he go . . . he could get back home in two hours. My contractions got closer all day long. My mom and I finally went to the hospital at 6 that night, right when the game was starting. I was admitted but I did not call Shawn ‘til the fourth quarter. He raced off the field and back to Boone. Our daughter was born the next morning.”

Summer is grateful for the bond she shares with the other wives.

“They are my best friends. No one else knows what you are going through except for them. We really lean on one another during football season and throughout the year. I am not sure what I would do without them. We walk together during practice, sit together during games and do lunch at least a couple of times a month. If I needed anything, I could call them and they would be there.”

Kelly Wiley is the wife of defensive coordinator John Wiley and the mother of three: Megan (17), Jaxon, (9) and Lucas (7).

“John arrived in Boone in 1989 with Coach Moore. With the exception of coaching a year at Iowa Wesleyan (1991) and a year at Valdosta (1992), John has been a Mountaineer for 19 years! We are unbelievably lucky and blessed!”

Kelly came to ASU as an undergrad in 1986 and cheered for ASU. “So, I first knew Coach Moore when I was a cheerleader! The cheerleading squad won a second National Championship through the Universal Cheerleading Association in 1989 so I used to tease John about winning a National Championship one day. He has long since ‘quieted me’ by winning three back-to-back national championships!”

“It is absolutely thrilling to me,” Kelly says, “for the football team to be so successful. First and foremost, I am a die-hard Appalachian fan and have been since 1986 when I was accepted as a student to ASU. It’s a bonus that my husband happens to coach for ASU; it helps with parking and tickets on occasion!”

It is “typically unheard of” in the coaching profession, Kelly notes, for one to stay in one place for so long. I’ve had other coaches’ wives ask me, ‘Where all have you been?’ I respond by saying, ‘I’ve been at ASU since I was a freshman and hopefully I’ll be here a long, long time!’”

At times, Kelly says, she has wondered what it would be like to have to wear colors other than black and gold.“I think it would be nearly impossible! For one thing, I’ve lived here so long, those are the only colors I have in my closet! You can take the girl out of ASU, but you can’t take ASU out of the girl!”

Kelly says family life revolves around John’s erratic schedule.“Beginning in August, the coaches’ wives are known as ‘football widows.’ We catch glimpses of our husbands every now and then, but usually don’t see them more than a few minutes a day. When my boys were younger, I would take them to practice and point to John on the field and say,‘Look guys... that’s your daddy!’ - just to make sure they remembered him! We adapt 46 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

to what’s going on with John’s schedule and try to see him when we can.

It has been very important to my sanity to have my own interests and hobbies and find the balance between being involved in John’s profession and sustaining myself through pursuits of my own. Being married to a football coach is a lot like being a single parent for five months out of the year.With the help of wonderful extended family and friends, we get through the times when dad is not around.”

Kelly is self-sufficient, able to take matters into her own hands when John’s not around. “This has gotten me in trouble on occasion. We live up on a mountain, so mowing the grass (which is typically John’s job) is tedious, at best! So after the season begins, I’ll fire up the tractor and take on the mountain myself.” She admits to “a couple of times” when she’s called John at practice, asking him to bring some players home with him to remove the tractor from the woods across the street . . . “after I abandoned it while it was flying down the mountain!”

Winning the national championship three times in a row has been unconceivable at times.“I feel so proud for the players, the coaches and everybody associated with Appalachian State and Boone. It is truly amazing that in this small mountain community we have something so special and large that the rest of the nation knows our name - and is even figuring out how to pronounce it! It is an honor to be a part of the Appalachian family. Coach Moore is a special man who has always made an extra effort to include the wives and children in the football program. He makes us feel like we are just as important as the quarterback (well, almost!).

He understands that happy wives make for happy husbands and better coaches!”

Donna Jones and her husband Dale, in his 12th season at ASU, coaching the linebackers, both graduated from the University of Tennessee in Knoxville.They have one daughter, Brooke, who is four. Andy, their Tibetan terrier dog, rounds out the family.

Since moving to Boone, Donna has been involved in her own career – previously in sales and currently in marketing at Hospitality Mints.

“I support my husband by attending football games. Game day is the highlight of our week! I also assume many responsibilities in regards to Brooke and her schedule during this time. In addition, Brooke and I offer great emotional support to Dale. It’s really tough if we lose a game - it makes for a long weekend.The coaches take it hard, as do the wives.

Fortunately, we haven’t had much disappointment in the last three years.

Dale is a great coach and works really hard. Brooke and I are proud of his accomplishments.

“As coaches’ wives, we get together every month for lunch and/or dinner to celebrate birthdays. We also see each other throughout the week at practices and game day. We offer great support to one another with schedules, children, etc.”

With her husband’s hectic schedule - working every day during football season and afterward - “the recruiting starts and the coaches travel for several weeks.” Donna admits,“It’s rare to have a weekend with your spouse during football season and recruiting. I stay busy with my career and my daughter’s activities. I also love to travel and do fun things with friends. In addition, I run a lot and work out. I am very independent and stay extremely busy.”

Donna adds, “I love our football players. We have a great group of young men. It’s an inspiration to see them succeed on and off the field.

Dale and I have dinner with the linebackers on occasion. In addition, there are other functions that involve the coaches, football players, and families.”

Donna says, “After a while, you learn to adjust to the disruptions of normal life. Football becomes part of your life. I really enjoy the game and its competitiveness. I always played sports. Therefore, it’s easy for me to embrace football.”

Yes, there is life outside of football for the Jones family, too.“Dale and I are very involved with Brooke and her activities. She started gymnastics and loves it! In addition, we both have fulfilling hobbies that are non-football related.”

As a result of the three championship wins, Donna says, “You are recognized more in the community. Boone is a small town and it’s fun and interesting getting to know people in the community.”

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More Women In “Sporting” Roles at ASU S

port support . . . support- his wife says. “On game day, John is up really early. I try to help get his clothes ing sports . . . however you and everything ready. Much later, after the crowd is gone, I bring him dinner or say it – it means the same at a sweet treat. It’s nice to be with him when it’s quiet, especially after the play-off ASU. Whether as the one sell- games when you realize what is coming up.” ing thousands of tickets each Christy enjoys the family-friendly atmosphere surrounding Mountaineer season, or the head coach’s as- football, glad she and Madison can visit and eat with the team on practice days. sistant making sure he’s where As most others, she basically become a single parent this time of year, but when he’s supposed to be, or wife empted to complain, she remembers those who have husbands overseas. “It of the equipment manager or could be a lot worse.” A student from a camp she worked with this past summer team chaplain, there are many told her, “You are really lucky to have such an exciting life.” women behind the scenes of And, yes, Christy agrees. “The triple championship status has done a lot for Mountaineer success – and ASU and its athletic program, instead of seeing Chapel Hill shirts at ASU, you more than space will allow us see ASU shirts at Chapel Hill. John always comes home with exciting news...an to introduce.

Emmy, another TV special, a big interview - it never stops.”

Denise Watson: John’s staff (of student helpers) is “fantastic,” she describes. “I don’t think Administrative people realize all that goes on the behind the scenes.”

Assistant to head coach, The Welches enjoy hosting the players for meals. One player lived with them Jerry Moore while waiting for his apartment early in the season. Christy says,“They really help

Handling the daily mass of me more than I help them. They’re great with Madison, truly fantastic guys who correspondence that reaches always make her feel special. I have never heard any of them use vulgarity or talk the office - addressed to the about anything inappropriate, even when I am in their territory. In fact, it is quite boss for his review - and keep- the opposite as they often talk Bible studies and church.”

Denise Watson ing his calendar straight so he John Welch wants to make sure everyone knows that he appreciates his knows where he’s supposed to be, are just a few of the many tasks that keep wife.“Soon after Madison was born, Christy had to have surgery in October that Jerry Moore’s administrative assistant on her toes. required bed rest for at least four weeks. Instead of having me stress, worry and “Believe me - since Michigan – there’s been lots of correspondence,” states De- take time from football, she and Madison stayed with her parents in Concord. I nise Watson, who, in the eyes of many Mountaineer fans, has the “ultimate” job can’t think of a greater sacrifice. She constantly helps me with everything - from – rubbing elbows with anybody that’s somebody in the world of ASU football. inventory to laundry. She has fixed meals for players during their Bible studies Those of us who know Denise understand that it takes a lot to impress her. and is always a champion for the players’ character, not just their athletic ability.

An office shared with Jerry Moore on the top level of the Owens Field House She has done many special things for the players and their families – very quietly overlooking Kidd Brewer Stadium might just do the trick. so as not to draw attention to herself and often invites the families to the house Surrounded by football her entire life, Denise looks forward to coming to or to special events. work each day.

“I work long hours and do little to contribute to the household. (She only As the daughter of another local coaching legend, the late Elmer Aldridge, complains a little.) She makes out-of-town deliveries and pickups for me, spends Denise is often reminded of the legacy her father left behind - one that influ- countless hours organizing the laundry room for me. She goes out of her way enced many who followed in his tracks, including Newland’s hometown hero, to bring Madison to see me since I can’t get home to see her. It all means a lot Paul C. Johnson, recently named head coach at Georgia Tech.

Many of us have often compared Denise’s father to her current boss – two men who aren’t ashamed of their Christian faith and who truly care about their players, on and off the field.

Denise grew up surrounded by football – her father coached, her brothers played, she married into a family of athletes and most of her own offspring, have followed suit.

“I have always loved sports. I don’t think I missed over five of Dad’s games at Avery.”

On a day-to-day basis at the office, Denise filters through a lot of correspondence on recruits – e-mails, film, etc. She keeps supplies on hand for all the coaches and trainers, prepares work orders for repairs, etc. For the team and the associate AD, she prepares every game’s “ticket list” for players’ families and she keeps itineraries for the teams and staff for every game, “so they know where they are supposed to be and when.”

Each February, Denise compiles all paperwork for incoming scholarship recruits and in May, she does necessary revisions for scholarships for remaining (scholarship) players . . . and then on to the summer school scholarships. And then . . . “pretty much whatever (else) the AD, coaches and the trainers need.”

One of the most important parts of her job – according to some – is keeping full the candy dish on her desk for the players and staff.

Christy Welch: wife of equipment manager, John Welch Christy is a busy middle-school counselor and mother of Madison, “Daddy’s little girl.”

Always among the first on the field and the last one out of the Top row, left to right, Erin Flynn, Leila and Merrin Jackson and Ashleigh Stroot. stadium, John easily works 16-18 hours a day during this season, Bottom row, from left, Julie Hunt, Kellan Flynn, Stacy Smith, Christy and Madison Welch.

48 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

to me and I am happy to see her and the other great wives honored this way.”

Ashleigh Stroot: wife of video coordinator, Jake Stroot “My husband works during the day and when everyone else is sleeping, too,” Ashleigh says, she, herself, working a fulltime day job, so “family time” is limited. “Our son, Peyton, and I go on middle-ofthe-night visits and bring him Mountain Lightning and hugs to keep him going.” When Peyton was an infant, he and Ashleigh often spent the night on the floor of the defensive backs’ meeting room. “Despite the times I woke up with a backache, the time together as a new family was priceless. Peyton, now three, thinks he owns that field house. It’s our second home.”

During her pregnancy, Ashleigh served as Jake’s “unofficial” assistant due to limited staff, hauling cameras up the stadium steps and running the wide-angle cameras for football practices. Even after Peyton was born, if Jake was short handed, both mom and son came to the rescue. “There were many occasions when I was trying to concentrate on wide receiver versus defensive back drills with a screaming baby in the background.”

Sometimes she also ran tapes for the coaches after practice.“Those were trying times, but made our family even stronger. I thank God for Coach Moore and the staff’s willingness to bear with us through that season.

Ashleigh adds, “App State football affects almost every aspect of our lives from our mortgage to our laundry. Being a part of it comes with thrills and excitement, but also great sacrifice. Jake averages 115120 hours per week for five months. Fortunately, I am an independent woman.”

ASU football also impacted where the Stroots bought their home. “Having waited a couple of years to find a home in the neighborhood of Stadium Drive, so that making those visits would be convenient and so that Jake wouldn’t have far to drive when he’s been awake for 40 straight hours.”

Stacey Smith “Last year was Justin’s first year as App State’s head football athletic trainer and my first year teaching at Rutherford College Elementary. My obligations as a new teacher in Burke County did not allow me to travel to the away games.” Torn between job and family, Stacey balanced well, making at least every home game and the national championship in Chattanooga. Supporting her husband is “extremely important,” she notes.

Justin’s hours “are a little different” from most associated with football, she states. “He is responsible for assessing and treating all injuries, often seeing players three times daily, based on their injuries. He covers all practices, running sessions, and weight-lifting sessions, usually leaving home at 5:15 a.m., returning between 8:00 and 9:00 p.m. Never with an entire day off during the season, he also works a few hours each Sunday.”

Quality time is “extremely difficult” during the season, but they make the best of it. “We try to eat dinner together when possible and discuss our day before we go to sleep. I also try to be present in the training room most Sundays.”

This season, the Smiths are expecting their first child. “It will be interesting to see how we manage

our schedules to be the most involved parents we can possibly be and spend the most time we can as a family.”

Last year was Justin’s first year at ASU, Stacey says. “We have seen the program only at its best.We know it will be tough to top his first season. I like to think of him as a good luck charm for the team.”

She’s proud that she and her husband are part of such a good, solid program, “the people associated with football here work hard and are very dedicated.”

It’s not all about the football, she says.“There is a sense of family and community. Everyone is very supportive of each other in all aspects of life. I just try to be a supportive wife. He loves his job and I try to be understanding of his hours and his commitments.”

Moving from Alabama was a tough decision, leaving behind family, friends and comfort of home.

“Justin had been gone to Germany for the prior four months and had just two weeks to begin football at ASU. After he left, I had only a few weeks myself to quit my job, find a new job in NC, put the house on the market, pack all our belongings, and head to Boone. It was tough.” The ASU football family proved “so helpful and welcoming when we arrived. We are indebted to many people for helping us make it through that first year, especially strength coach, Jeff Dillman, and his wife. Jeanne. They were so kind and concerned and eager to help us.”

Teresa Eggers: Assistant Athletic Ticket Mgr. For eight years, she has been helping fill the stands for the games, admitting that championship status, three has brought more business into her office “year-round.”

Current ticket sales, compared to five years ago, are “considerably higher,” she notes. “We’ve had an approximate 97-percent increase in season ticket sales in the past year, which sold out very early in the summer, Teresa said; single game tickets disappeared in early August.

A Watauga County native, Teresa and her family have always been involved in sports – from coaching to playing. She volunteered for 10 years as an athletic game operations coordinator, helping benefit her children’s elementary school and the staff councilsponsored annual shopping spree for underprivileged children.

Has the excitement created more jobs in the ticket office? While no “new hires” have been added to the relatively small office staff, she says that staff from other areas in the department “are great” about helping out during rush times.

What has the Mountaineer mania meant to her personally? “I am thankful for the program that Jerry Moore and the staff have built, as well as the positive example ‘Coach’ has been in the community and to his players. I will always cherish the friendships that I’ve acquired through helping people with tickets.”

Teresa’s husband, Scott, is an ASU alumnus, she has been classified as a “lifelong” senior at Appalachian, and their son, Jacob, is a junior scholar athlete at ASU. The Eggers family has been very supportive of “Mom’s” work with ASU athletics. Scott helps with

game day operations while since age five, teenage daughter, Sarah, has been close to Teresa’s side as gopher, ticket counter, etc.“Jake helps, too, when he’s available.”

Erin Flynn: wife of Mike Flynn, Assistant Athletic Director for Sports Information “I traveled to a lot of games when it was just Mike and me. Now, it just depends on the distance and if I have someone to watch our one-year-old, Kellan. I try to make as many games as I can because, many times, it is the only opportunity I have to see Mike during the weekends.”

Like most staff, Mike’s hours are long. He stays late to accommodate media at practice, and afterward, arranges players and coaches for interviews, and returns to the office to write practice review for a local media website. “He’s usually home late and that’s tough. He’s not able to spend as much time with his daughter as I think he would like to.”

Dinner is usually later, too. “Friday nights, he is often at the stadium well into the evening if it’s a home game, setting up the press box. On game day, he’s at the stadium very early.” Erin and Kellan usually arrive about two hours before the game to visit “before he gets too crazy.” Then they try to catch him with about five minutes left in the game as he heads onto the field to grab players and coaches for interviews and press conferences.

“We leave, and it usually takes anywhere from three to four hours after the games before he finishes work and comes home. We get up Sunday and go to church, then back to work to get stats to the coaches and start working on game notes for the next week.”

Erin says championship status has “obviously” gotten more people interested in ASU football.

“Games are packed and there is much more tailgating. Parking is crazy and so are some of the fans.

From Mike’s end, that means more media requests for interviews. It has really drawn so much more attention to the university, which is always a good thing.”

At the same time, Erin says, “The seasons never seem to end. We are still doing football stuff during winter, spring, and summer! It’s a lot busier than when we first arrived at Appalachian, but it is a lot of fun!”

It’s “a real privilege” for Erin to have become acquainted with the “amazing staff and their incredible families.” She adds, “We have a ton of really nice, genuinely good people supporting the team who really care about each other. That seems to make it all worth it. The players are awesome people, as caring and kind as everyone else involved in the football program. The coaches’ wives are great, the support staff wives are equally as wonderful. They make it a lot of fun to be around . . . a great group of friends who would be there if the others really needed them.”

So, there you have it, folks – a glimpse into the lives of some of the women behind the success of the ASU Mountaineers. It’s true what they say . . .“behind every successful man, there’s a good woman, a busy woman, a compassionate woman – and most of all in Boone – a football-loving, hard-working woman who does all she can to keep it together – at least from August through December. aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 49

‘‘

In Loving Memory of Jean-Luc. Photo courtesty of Cindy Cafaro

V

ictories arrive in our lives in many forms - some march proudly into our lives led by marching bands and thousands of fans. Others are more subtle, like gentle breezes refreshing a hard-working gardener after a sweaty and victorious battle fighting weeds.

Some victories whisper in our ears, sniff our faces and lick our chins. Those victories are defined through the love of a dog. The definition for a victory is as unique as every moment ticking its way through a lifetime.

Hazrat Inayat Kan wrote, “Joy and sorrow are the light and shade of life; without light and shade no picture is clear.”

Cindy Cafaro testifies to understanding the deepest meaning of claiming one’s victories. Her life is full. Joy and sorrow make their marks in her life. Where they reside in the photographs of Cindy’s life, dogs define their clarity.

Saturday, April 12, 2008 marked one of the saddest days Cindy Cafaro can recall. It is the day that she said goodbye to Jean-Luc, aka “Angel Boy.” Jean-Luc symbolized pure love to Cindy and a victory she claimed 14 years earlier.Years ago, on July 31, Cindy’s birthday, she gifted herself with the adorable, affectionate, peppy little dachshund puppy she lovingly nicknamed “Angel Boy” and officially called “Jean Luc Picard.”

While she gave him a loving home, through his kisses, he gave her the strength to weather life’s storms.True for both happy and sad moments, Jean-Luc became her shadow.

By her own account, for the 25 years preceding Jean-Luc, Cindy’s life was relatively uneventful. As fate would have it, Jean-Luc arrived just in time.

Cindy, a survivor of domestic violence (in her first marriage) found strength and independence in caring for her family.That sorrowful challenge drew the bond between mother and child ever closer. Discovering a need in their Floridian community, Cindy and her children embarked on a joint project to manage the animal shelter.

50 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

‘‘

Pet Page|By Genevieve Austin

As a family venture, they created a foster care program, saving many animals that would have been euthanized. Cindy made announcements on local TV channels,“I want to make this perfectly clear: there is no reason for anyone in this county to abandon any animal when they can give it to us so that we can find a good home for it.” Many dogs are grateful for their efforts. Cindy’s Jean-Luc became her source of strength and inspiration.

Through multiple tragedies, Cindy was able to stay strong with the energy and enthusiasm of her canine shadow. Behind closed doors, Cindy’s tears flowed and she says, “Jean-Luc never let a tear hit the pillow.” Jean-Luc weathered many of life’s storms with Cindy. When she felt the need to leave her second marriage of 25 years, it was Jean-Luc’s love that gave her the strength to claim that very mixed victory. Cindy and Jean-Luc found happiness on their own, but life became complete when Cindy met her third husband, Joe Cafaro, owner of Joe’s Italian Kitchen in Boone.

Jean-Luc lived fourteen beautiful years brightening Cindy’s days. With tremendous sorrow and no regret, she kissed him goodbye that tearful Saturday in April.

Cindy, the office manager for Aisling Broadcasting in Boone, found her niche in creating the Pet Patrol page on goblueridge.net. Through her work with Pet Patrol, she is constantly aware of the news regarding local animals.The timing of Jean-Luc’s death coincided with the break-up of the puppy mill in Todd. Cindy discovered there was one dachshund puppy that barely survived. She committed to giving that dog a home, if it survived, but the dog had to be hospitalized for an extensive period.

While she kept a close eye on his well being, another little dog came to her attention, a black miniature dachshund she found on the Internet. The little black beauty they named Pepper appeared to be healthy and content. But when they brought Pepper home, they quickly discovered she had never lived outside a crate, didn’t understand what a toy was and was terrified of light and people. Cindy worked diligently to find a way to socialize her frightened new dog. Professional dog trainer John Quy told her that Pepper needed a dominant friend.

Once given proper care, the dachshund in critical condition healed quickly and dramatically. The timing could not have been better! When the puppy mill dachshund was ready to be released, Cindy’s husband, Joe, joyfully picked him up.This male quickly embraced the role of Alpha dog and became Pepper’s canine pal. They named this dachshund Data.

Data showed Pepper the joy of toys, how to play, what one does with snacks (he hides them all over the house) and that they are family.

Cindy’s loss of Jean-Luc will forever pain her soul, but his loving heart made hers big enough to welcome new friends and to create a home for two deserving companions. The victories Cindy claims are the strong spirits of survival she finds in her new babies. Cindy, Joe and Joe’s parents share one big, happy home and are happily claiming their victories daily. “The first thing I do every day when I wake up is kiss my husband and my babies,” Cindy says. “And the last thing I do in the day is kiss my husband and my babies . . . and tell them I love them.”

Send questions or comments for Genevieve to: comments@aawmag.com.

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aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 51

Cent$ & Sensibility| By Corrinne Loucks

Travel On A Dime A

re the kids bugging you for that last trip of the year? Maybe you haven’t taken vacation but have the promise hanging out there.

On your own and need to refresh before finishing out the year?

Lots of us feel the need to get away but our pocketbooks are not quite in alignment. Fear not, with a little time and effort you can scratch that vacation itch! (See “Camping” below….)

Let’s assume that you’re taking a family trip - explore some ideas that will be fun for everyone and affordable for you. First of all, don’t let gas prices spoil your fun. Pick a place within easy driving distance and take the most economical vehicle to which you have access. Space won’t matter as much on a short drive. In addition to saving on gas, you will minimize the number of times you have to hear, “Are we almost there?”

Consider camping. You will certainly get that whole “togetherness” opportunity while, at the same time, you will keep your kids away from the TV, cell phones, etc.There are many great camping destinations in North Carolina and Tennessee.

Mount Mitchell State Park, at 6,320 feet, has the highest campground east of the Mississippi. While in the park, families enjoy hiking, picnicing and the park’s observation tower and restaurant. If the weather doesn’t hold in your favor, (or the kids get bored) Asheville is only 35 miles away.

Or, camp along a river such as the Nolichucky or French Broad (Erwin, TN to Asheville, NC), or the New River and enjoy rafting or tubing. Stop at any local tire store and have old tubes blown up for $5-6 apiece and go for an inexpensive float! Float a cooler behind your tube and stop on the shore for a picnic along the way.

Go swimming, boating and fishing at Lake Norman State Park in Troutman, NC where the campground is on a peninsula nearly encircled by the lake. (That same Asheville rule above can apply to Concord or Charlotte, when you are here!)

The eastern part of the state also has scenic river campgrounds on the Lumber and Little Pee Dee. Or enjoy the beach and the outer banks as tent campers. Take a ferry to reach Ocracoke Campground.

Screaming for the beach? You can find great package deals at the beach. I just found a three- night package at a Myrtle Beach resort, which includes a three-night stay, two passes to a local amusement, a $25 dinner certificate and use of amenities including several pools and golf. The price was for the entire stay - not per person – and, with a kitchenette, you wouldn’t even have to spend lots of money eating out!

Heart set on the Outer Banks? Fun festivals abound in October, including a visit with Jack Sparrow at the Pirate Fest in Kitty Hawk or the Stunt Kite Competition in Nags Head. With summer over and (I hate to say it) hurricane season in swing, Outer Banks hotel deals are being updated daily online. I saw a Ramada Inn on Nag’s Head for $62 per night. For about half the price, you can stay in hotels off, but adjacent to, the beaten path. Rooms in Carolina Beach, for example, start in the $40 range and a Best Western on North Myrtle Beach, a quieter 52 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

section of family - oriented beach, starts at $36.99 per night!

Fancy yourself at a Fall Festival? North Carolinians get excited when the weather turns cooler and fall festivals abound. On September 25-28, fans crowd into Mayberry Days, paying tribute to Andy Griffith’s hometown of Mount Airy, NC. Enjoy concerts, dances, apple pie and Snappy’s World Famous pork chop sandwiches! Opie isn’t your style? (Shame on you!) Thanks to an annual shift in the Gulf Stream, fall blesses North Carolina’s coast with an abundance of fish, from mackerel and mahi-mahi to sea trout and grouper. Take a deep sea fishing charter, or fish from the pier and bring in your own catch of the day. Have it mastered? Sign up for the US Open King Mackerel Tournament in Southport, October 2-4.

Or, head to Statesville from October 24-26 for the 35th Annual Balloon Fest! This second largest balloon fest in the country offers 50 hot air balloons, balloon rides, a balloon glow at night, kids’ activities, wine-tasting, live bands, arts and crafts, etc. There is truly something for everyone.

The NC State Fair is being held October 16-26. In addition to the anticipated midway rides, livestock exhibits and rodeo shows, this year’s event includes a dinosaur exhibit, action sports stunt show and fireworks every night. Concerts include Montgomery Gentry, Josh Turner, Toby Mac, Joe Nichols and Chef, and Booby Flay, to name a few.

Day tripping? Only have the time or resources for a day trip? We are blessed to live in an area with quick access to so many awesome choices!

Or, for a deal the whole family can enjoy, a Circle K Family 4Pack is available for the Bank of America 500 on Saturday night, October 11 at 7:30 p.m. at Lowe’s Motor Speedway near Charlotte.The pack includes 4 tickets in the Diamond Tower Terrace, 4 hot dogs and 4 cokes for $159.

Bring your herd to the NC Zoo at Asheboro (south of Greensboro), one of the first natural habitat zoos in the country and see the new Watani Grasslands Reserve, an imaginary African national park rich in elephants, rhinos and herds of antelope, which opened in April 2008.

Hit the 25th Annual Barbecue Festival in Lexington on Saturday, October 25th.

And certainly don’t forget our very own Oktoberfest on Sugar Mountain October 11-12 or the 31st Annual Woolly Worm Festival and Valle Country Fair during the third weekend in October 18-19th in the Banner Elk/Valle Crucis area.

Searching for Freedom? You already know that there are thousands of free things to do in our area. Hiking trails, waterfalls, rock climbing, museums, adventures along the Blue Ridge Parkway, apple picking, free concerts, etc., abound. Check online at www.free-attractions.com for free museums, parks, concerts, parades, festivals, and zoos in North Carolina and surrounding states.

Bottom line: You can treat yourself and the kids to a memorymaking adventure without damaging your bottom line.

Send questions/comments for Corrinne to: comments@aawmag.com.

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Mom’s World|

Claiming Our Victories

By Heather W. Jordan, CNM, MSN

Clipart.com image

Victory belongs to the most persevering.

–Napoleon Bonaparte

A

s a woman and a mother, I think our children can teach us all something about perseverance and victory. Perhaps I see this most clearly in my oldest son,Will, who can work tirelessly at a problem he has given himself (be it physical, logistical, or creative) until he is successful or at least has made a valiant effort towards a solution.

I cannot count the times that he has asked, in complete and utter seriousness, how and when I might be able to purchase supplies to help him in a task that seems not only beyond his intellect and skill level, but also beyond mine.

In the past six months, we have discussed building jet engines, go karts, hang gliders, and trebouchets (a middle age weapon to launch large objects). When I have stared at him blankly and replied that I really and truly have no idea how to begin such an endeavor without personal contacts in highly specialized fields or academia, there is not an ounce of defeat in his stance. He sits down with his pencil and paper and starts sketching out exactly how he will proceed to build these incredibly complex mechanical wonders. He writes down a materials list, starts talking to me about lift and drag and what type of material would be strong enough/lightweight enough/pliable enough to utilize and then asks me if I think I could make a trip to Lowe’s or a hobby shop so that he might get started. If the actual machine is out of reach (for now), he “settles” for a mock up model which he tests with scientific precision, noting the defects and capabilities of his work.

The only thing that really seems to defeat his imagination is when practicality limits both attempt and execution of his idea. He thrives on the trying and perseveres despite lack of supplies, mentors, or knowledge of all the complicated laws of physics that may apply. This is how I know, as his mother, he will succeed in whatever career endeavor he takes on – because his ability to work through adversity and fuel himself towards solutions is so clearly apparent, even at the age of ten. He will 54 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

do what he sets out to do, but will continue to learn through the various projects that fail.

This is what we as parents try to instill in our children.That seeking victory is certainly admirable, but claiming victory is not always about the winning. That in order to feel victorious, one must approach the challenge with humility, reflect respect throughout the journey, and be humbled by the experience. None of us knows everything, but wisdom certainly comes through seeking, ambition, and yes, perseverance.

When you step out of the intellectual realm and consider sports, the same approach should apply, but is perhaps at times harder to take.

We’ve all seen the parents yelling on the sidelines of a football/baseball/ soccer game, infuriated at a call or missed play or unfair circumstance.

We’ve probably all contributed to this to some degree or another.Why? Because we want our children to win. We want them to succeed. We want them to feel good about themselves.

Striking out or missing a block or a free throw is all part of the game, to be sure, but as parents we feel the sinking of our gut as we watch our children do such things. And yet, I am thoroughly convinced that much of their emotional response to losing or making a bad play or missing a play is a direct consequence of not only our response, but also the culture in which we live.

Watch any prime time professional athletic competition and it is readily apparent that our culture has evolved into one that is increasingly egotistical and competitive with the greatest emphasis on an individual’s personal value to a team. Even in team sports, the fact that an individual can bring in multi-million dollar contracts points to not only the pressure these athletes face, but the temptations of material success.

Back down to our local kid’s sporting events, I certainly don’t anticipate all the pressures of professional leagues, but wish and hope that the emphasis remains on the camaraderie, hard work, and personal pride that comes from practice, dedication, and the love of a sport. It is with this approach that our kids will develop their self esteem, make friends, and sculpt their own ideas about what winning truly means.

I agree with Napoleon, but only partially. Rightfully claiming our victories depends not only on persevering, but also on identifying success.

Al Gore had the right idea when he said, “No matter how hard the loss, defeat might serve as well as victory to shape the soul and let the glory out.”

If you have comments or questions about this article, please feel free to contact Heather Jordan, Certified Nurse-Midwife, at the office of Charles E. Baker, MD at 828-737-7711 x253 or e-mail her at landh@ localnet.com.

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

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Ac Ad Siz Ar Pu Sa D Ap

“Good morning, this is OASIS. May I help you?”

By Rebecca Gummere

T

hus starts another day at one of the High Country’s busiest nonprofit agencies. OASIS (Opposing Abuse with Service, Information, & Shelter), Inc. began in 1978 as a volunteer-directed organization in response to crisis needs that weren’t being addressed – victims and children who were fleeing abuse, as well as those individuals who were survivors of sexual assault. Thirty years later, the agency is still going strong although, as Executive Director Jennifer Herman frequently states, “We’d love to work ourselves out of a job,” envisioning a future when family violence no longer is tolerated in the community.

A typical day – if there is such a thing in a crisis response organization – begins with a brief staff meeting (there are nine staff members), during which time the telephone seldom stops ringing. OASIS services are available 24/7 year-round and the calls range from victims needing medical advocacy at the emergency room, to shelter, to referrals for housing, childcare, or food-related needs. Often, clients come in to talk with a staff member about options. Leaving an abusive relationship is a process and a dangerous one at that. Most domestic violence-related homicides occur when the victim is leaving the abuser, so the decision to leave must be made carefully and with lots of information, resources, and support.

The agency owns a 12-bed shelter at a confidential location and women and children who stay there find themselves in a safe, home-like environment.* OASIS also offers an ongoing support group for survivors of domestic violence, so the women who attend can provide each other with friendship and support during what can be a lonely time of overwhelming transition. Clients can receive case management to help them set and attain their goals for independent and safe living. OASIS offers advocacy in the medical, legal, housing, financial, and employment areas and also works closely with Department of Social Services, Family Solutions, Legal Aid, and New River Behavioral Healthcare. In addition, the agency enjoys positive working relationships with the Watauga County Sheriff’s Office, the Boone Police Department, the Watauga Medical Center, and Appalachian State University.

OASIS recently moved into a new facility where two other agencies are housed – W. A. M. Y. Community Action, with whom OASIS partnered to purchase the building, and The Children’s Council. The new Family Resource Center is an experiment in collaboration, a coming trend in the nonprofit world in general and a good thing for area residents. Clients who come to OASIS can move from their current crisis situation to safety and sustainability all in one building, and can do so one step at a time with lots of support and encouragement along the way.

Many area businesses all support the work of OASIS – local restaurants, hotels, physicians, printers, real estate agents, and attorneys all pro56 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

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A Typical Day At OASIS

vide behind-the-scenes resources, services, and funding for OASIS clients and the overall operation. Hundreds of individuals donate regularly to help ensure services are consistent and of the highest quality. This nearly invisible network of partners is part of the community investment that has helped make OASIS a strong, stable, and caring organization.

OASIS is more than crisis response for victims of violence and assault, though. There are ongoing efforts to educate the public about the reality of gender-based violence and the urgency of intervening so that the cycle of violence can be broken. A grant that funds primary prevention seeks to change social norms, addressing gender-role stereotyping, media attitudes, and myths about sexual violence as well as enhancing bystander behavior and partnering with males who share the concern about the prevalence of sexual violence. Staff members work with middle school children, youth and adults in faith communities, professionals in civic organizations, and make contact with ASU students through groups, clubs, information expos, and classroom visits. ASU students respond by becoming some of the agency’s most valued volunteers.

OASIS has a crisis line staffed by volunteers in the evenings and on weekends. Crisis line volunteers receive intensive training to prepare them for assessing and responding to crisis calls.

There are around 25 crisis line volunteers who help keep OASIS services available on a continuous basis. A staff member is always on call during the evening hours to provide crisis services as needed.

During October, OASIS is partnering with First Presbyterian Church to present two evenings of programs about domestic violence. The first, on Wednesday, October 8, will address “Domestic Violence and OASIS’ services,” and the second, on Wednesday, October 15, will be a discussion with youth about “Teen Dating Violence.” Both evening events are open to members of the entire community, who are invited to come for supper at 6 p.m. There is no charge for supper, only the request to call ahead to reserve a spot. (Contact Joe or Harriet at 297-1533.) Those attending the program only should plan to arrive by 6:30 p.m.

To request a speaker or for more educational information about OASIS, please call the office between the hours of 8 to 5, Monday through Friday, at 264-1532. The Crisis Line number is 262-5035, or on-call staff can be reached by calling the Watauga County Sheriff’s Department at 264-3761 and asking to have them paged. *Although at a much lower rate, men are victims of domestic violence, too. OASIS can offer the full range of services and support to men who are fleeing domestic violence, but because the shelter is a communal living situation, OASIS assists men in finding safe shelter elsewhere.

Send questions/comments for Rebecca to: comments@aawmag.com

All We Need is Love

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Friends For Life

Breaking The Cycle of Violence – An OASIS Client Shares Her Story Of Success

(Due to the sensitive nature of this story, the author wishes to remain anonymous. We respect her wishes and express our appreciation to her for sharing how she “claimed her victory” by breaking free.)

I am a thirty-one-year-old single mom raising four children, working and going to school part-time. When I was seventeen, I got involved with the wrong guy, but I had never learned what a healthy relationship was supposed to be like. When I became pregnant with our first child, he gradually became physically abusive and more and more controlling. He also became possessive and isolated me from friends and family. I tried to leave many times, but always returned for different reasons. This relationship went on for ten years until I finally realized that nobody could save me.

People can give you all sorts of advice and tell you what they think you should do, but that’s easy for them to say because they’re not the ones who are in the abusive situation. I had to take that first step on my own and trust that there was someone who could help me through it all.

I would not have been able to do it without help from OASIS and God. My children and I had to leave with nothing, and OASIS helped with clothing, food, and other personal needs. We stayed in the shelter and in the transitional housing apartment until I was able to get housing of my own. When I started going to OASIS support groups, I began to understand the difference between a healthy relationship and an abusive one. The groups helped me realize that I don’t have to put up with someone calling me names and making me feel small.

I’ve learned that there is the possibility for a healthy relationship in the future, where I’m treated like a person and not a possession.

I have now been out of my abusive relationship for four years and I still attend support group through OASIS. I belong to a community of strong women and I am continually reminded of what is acceptable, and what is not acceptable in any relationship. I just wanted to say thanks for supporting OASIS and helping women like myself to break the cycle of violence.

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

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Betsy Patrick – Staying the Course… to Victory!

By Yozette “Yogi” Collins

T

he Grandfather Mountain Marathon runs from downtown Boone to MacRae Meadows on Grandfather Mountain – 26.2 miles and a net elevation gain of 1,000 feet. It is widely considered one of the toughest road races in the United States and not an ideal marathon for a first-time marathoner.

However, Banner Elk’s Betsy Patrick is not a typical first-timer.

In 2007, Betsy committed to run her first marathon and, since the Grandfather Marathon was in her area, she decided to enter. And won. Priding herself on running and cycling the way that intuitively seems right for her body and mind, she says, “I did not have a plan other than to run more of the course every week. I train hard because I get bored sometimes when I am not pushing myself. I think that for the marathon, it was perfect for me because I raced the way that I trained. I knew what to expect.”

Betsy ran the marathon again this past July, but had decided even before she began running that she would stop at mile 20. “I totally let myself off the hook,” she says. Her twin sister, Katie, met her with a car at mile 20, “But,” says Betsy, “I could see Katie did not want me to quit and thought that I could go further. I don’t like for anyone to think that I am not doing what I am capable of, so I tried again.” At mile 21, she again tried to get into Katie’s car, but changed her mind. Mile 23 was the same story, but thinking she had a little more oomph in her, Betsy told Katie, “Maybe I should just run until I can’t run anymore.” Katie’s excitement over that decision fueled Betsy’s last push to the end and to her second win.

Besides winning the Grandfather Marathon, Betsy has won four consecutive years (2004-2007) of Blood, Sweat and Gears, a 100mile loop cycling race in the High Country that boasts a cumulative climbing elevation of over 13,000 feet. It is not a race for the faint of heart -- or calves, for that matter. In 2007, Betsy set a course record when she became the first woman to finish the ride in less than five hours.

Though her race results say otherwise, Betsy insists that winning is not her goal; rather, she enjoys pushing herself more than competing against someone else. “I actually don’t care anymore about winning, although it is very nice to win. I care more about the effort I use and overcoming fears. I am very shy and introverted, which many times comes across as a snobby demeanor, I’m sure, but I am extremely pleased when I see anyone out running or riding bikes or exercising. It is one way that I feel like I am part of 58 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

something bigger than myself.”

Betsy’s first taste of “something bigger” came while on the cross country team at West Forsyth High School in Winston-Salem.

Though she considered herself an average runner, she recognized how much running meant to her, not just competing. Later, when she tried out for the UNC-Chapel Hill cross country team, she earned her spot with only one second to spare on her 5K time. “I barely made the team, but I did! I couldn’t believe it and I was so proud and excited.”

Following an injury her freshman year at Chapel Hill that forced her to sit on the sidelines, Betsy realized her identity was directly tied to running. After recovering from her injury, she moved to Boone (where her sister attended Appalachian) to start living and running in a new place. “One morning I was running down King Street and a man stopped and told me that I was beautiful. Every girl loves to hear that. People were different in Boone. I felt like I could breathe here. I signed up for school that fall, and started to run out at Bass Lake in Blowing Rock. I felt like, for the first time, I was in a place that felt like me.”

Because she is shy, Betsy finds that running and cycling are better than talking to others to help her cope with stress in her daily life. “Words are not sufficient to describe what it means to me to be able to escape from my problems every day, whether it is getting out on the trails at Bass Lake or climbing my favorite roads on my bike or going to the gym. It is definitely not a cure-all, but it is one of those gifts that have helped me time and time again bounce back from whatever situation I have gotten myself into.”

Have you ever spoken with someone who amazes you? Not just with their accomplishments, but the fact that they do not see their accomplishments as incredible as they are? Well, that’s how I felt talking to Betsy. At 30 years old, she has a commitment to and love for exercise that many people never develop. But, maybe the average person does not know how to develop those things. Maybe Betsy can help us! I look at Betsy and think, “This is her passion.

This is what she is meant to do.” I don’t think Betsy recognizes that, though exercise is a gift to her, it may also be her gift to share with others. And since she can lead by example, she shouldn’t even need to do much talking!

Send questions/comments for Yogi to: comments@aawmag.com.

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Entertainment Suggestions| Courtesy of Black Bear Books You Mean I Have To Look at the Body? Stories of Dying and Living By: Marcia M. Cham A pastor’s work is multi-faceted. You Mean I Have to Look at the Body? focuses on one aspect: the calls concerning death. Marcia Cham’s life as a pastor has been balanced with calls about death, along with calls about life, celebrations, and joys. Cham was inspired by many of those people in the book, whose stories help her show the truth of her observations about living and dying. Readers will find value in these stories, along with both comfort and hope and, possibly, affirmations of their own experiences, feelings, questions, and wonderings about the mysteries of death and life.

By sharing intimate, personal stories, Cham confronts her own fear of death through her pastoral experiences. As Cham journeys “through the valley of the shadow,” she moves deeper into the mysteries and surprises of life and death.The journey is colored by humor, respectful irreverence and honesty.

Marcia Cham is a retired pastor in the United Church of Christ. She lives in Watauga County with her husband Ken, is very active in her community and works as an on-call chaplain at the local medical center. Her inspiration comes from the ever-changing vistas of the Blue Ridge Mountains.

Big Green Purse: Use Your Spending Power to Create a Cleaner, Greener World

By: Diane MacEachern

The fastest, most effective way to protect the planet is to mobilize the most powerful consumer force in the world – women.

Women spend eighty-five cents of every dollar in the marketplace and when they harness the power of their purse – either by buying less or by buying green – manufacturers respond. Whether at a clothing outlet, at the grocery store, in the car lot, or online, wom-

en have a whole planetful of power. Want to clean up the air and water, stop global warming, defend yourself and your family against dangerous chemicals, and safeguard forests and other natural areas you love? Big Green Purse explains exactly how each one of us can make a difference – through small changes or substantial shifts. With easy-to-follow, specific information throughout, this book: ·Targets twenty-five key commodities where your dollars can have the most impact. ·Provides standards-based guidelines and “thumbs-up/thumbs-down” ratings to help you make the shift to eco-friendly products, companies, and services. ·Highlights eco-cheap strategies to help you save money but still live and shop green ·Reveals phony “green washing” marketing techniques you’ll want to avoid. ·Suggests simple and quick environmental lifestyle changes you can make regardless of how much money you spend.

Empowering and enlightening, Big Green Purse offers sensible, time-saving, and immediate strategies for green living that you can incorporate into your life today. Buying locally is a great way to stay green! Big Green Purse is available at local bookstores in the High Country.

Diane MacEachern is a bestselling environmental writer, sought-after public speaker, and the founder of www.biggreenpurse.com. She has advised the Environmental Protection Agency, World Bank,World Wildlife Fund, and many other agencies and organizations focused on protecting the planet.The author of Save our Planet: 750 Everyday Ways You Can Help Clean Up the Earth, MacEachern lives in the Washington D.C. suburbs in the energy efficient home she helped design and build more than twenty years ago.

Author information and book text taken from the Avery softcover edition.

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Young At Heart| By Heather Young

To the Victor, Go the Spoils

62 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

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T

he term “victory” brings to mind images of mythic heroes challenging gruesome monsters, ancient warriors fighting great battles, or football players celebrating in the end zone after getting a touchdown, dancing in ways that in any other situation would be deemed embarrassing and ridiculous! If you have been paying any sort of attention to recent events, you have (no doubt!) heard “victory” mentioned a few times during the recent political conventions and after Michael Phelps won eight gold medals at the Olympics. For myself, however, victory is not something that often affects my daily life…or so I thought.

When I first sat down to write this article, I spent a good deal of time contemplating what victories I have experienced. I could not think of anything that qualified as a gold-medal-deserving “Phelpsian” feat or that would one day be immortalized in art, film or prose, but I did begin to recognize small successes that made me smile when I thought about what I had accomplished.

I was never much of an athlete, but I did swim competitively as a youngster and won a few ribbons for my efforts. I have been able to visit several places on my travel “to do” list. And, I found an amazing deal on a pair of “must have” shoes last weekend (seriously, I got them for $8.50). But, by far, my best accomplishment, my greatest victory if you will, was learning to cook!

I imagine that a few of my dear readers are currently snickering at the thought that learning to cook can be claimed as a victory. Perhaps you grew up learning to cook from your mother or grandmother. Perhaps you had a natural talent in the kitchen. Not me! I wanted nothing - nada, nein, nyet - to do with anything related to cooking when I was growing up. I saw the kitchen as a strange creature that could suck away one’s heart, soul and creativity after many a failed dish, and beat one into submission with endless recipes for casseroles. Cooking was too precise, too controlled, and I had neither the desire nor the necessary weapons to do battle.

Then, I went to college - and to my surprise - I had to feed myself. My attitude toward the kitchen changed rather quickly during those formative years. I had had enough cafeteria food to last a lifetime within the first month, and eating out every meal was not feasible. I gathered my courage and re-entered the realm of the kitchen. Hesitantly at first, but soon I was ready to charge the beast head-on. What I had to learn was that cooking is not so ordered or disciplined – I did not have to follow recipes, I could create!

And create, I did! And fail, I did! But, with every defeat, I would rally, regroup. and charge again, because surrender was not an option.

Luckily, I was able to learn a great deal from the restaurants I worked in over the years. Watching the chefs taught me not only about the basics, but also about herbs and spices and combining flavors to excite and engage the palate. So, I watched, experimented and eventually discovered how thrilling cooking can be.

My mother is amazed that the girl, who could literally burn water and feel ill at the thought of having to pick up a pan and spatula,

now enjoys cooking, mainly because she herself hates to cook. But, you’ll never hear her utter a complaint about sharing in the spoils – whether it is one of my Thai curries, my rigatoni in cauliflower sauce, my brie-stuffed turkey meatloaf or my Mayan chocolate pie.

The kitchen has become a place of refuge for me – a place where I can escape from the trials of the day. I get to create, and the effect is calming. I still have the occasional disaster, but I do not take it to heart. I may occasionally lose a battle, but I feel that I have won the war. I have declared victory over the kitchen and, sometimes after a particularly delicious meal, I have the urge to let out a celebratory roar as I do a silly little dance around the dining room table and think to myself, “Wow… I made that. It’s sooo yummy! I actually made that!” Maybe I deserve that gold medal after all.

Send questions/comments for Heather to: comments@aawmag.com.

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Bonnie Church, CNC, Wellness Coach with Healthy Lady| By Pattie Driesell, Life Coach and counselor

Bulimia: The Secret Battle

A

re you obsessively concerned about putting on weight? Do you sometimes lose control and eat huge amounts of food. Afterwards, do you force yourself to vomit, take laxatives or diuretics, or exercise intensely so as not to gain weight?

This is a condition called Bulimia. It is not a fad. It is not a phase. It is an eating disorder. You are not alone in your struggle. Very likely there are hundreds in this community who are struggling as well.

It is important to seek help. Bulimia can lead to depression, alcoholism, mood swings and anxiety. The medical complications of Bulimia include: tooth erosion, stomach ulcers with potential of eruptions of the stomach and esophagus, abnormal build up of fluid in the intestine, electrolyte imbalance, and heart damage.

The first step to getting help, is recognizing you need it. You very likely feel ashamed and guilty about your secret life of binging and purging.

Patti Driesell, a life coach in the Atlanta area, understands the shame and pain of bulimia. She was there. Patti describes her journey below.

A Perfect Life – From The Outside “The isolation is so real.

The desires are so penetrating . . . so all consuming.

As they set in, the world disappears and another world takes over.

A world in which I am the driven, not the driver. . . .”

These haunting words were written by a young college woman whose life appeared, to the outside world, the picture of success and happiness.

She was beautiful, outgoing, vivacious and fun. She excelled in school and in sports. Her friends envied her seemingly perfect life. However, on the inside she was tormented and driven by ruthless compulsions to binge and purge. How do I know? She and I are one and the same.

Since I can remember, my body has hosted a war. I have battled with myself, with food. Food has been my lover, my best friend, my savior, my enemy and the reason I have begged God to take me from this earth at times.

I felt totally possessed by urges and desires that I could not control or understand. There was a force inside of me that would drive me to binge against all of my best-laid plans, prayers, efforts and willpower. In college I would wake up every morning and pray: “Dear God, please help me make it to my classes today!” Eight out of ten times, it never happened. At some point during the day, I would find myself unable to fight the pressure. My mind would reel, and then all of my willpower and best-laid plans disappeared as the “other power” took over. I would find myself in yet another binge. Once it started, I became a slave to complete the long and difficult ritual.

Out of Control, Control

When the “drive to binge” took control, all my efforts to control myself and food - through therapy, journaling, written-out food plans, prayer after prayer after prayer - fell to the wayside like confetti in the wind.

As hard and feverishly as I tried to be the “driver” of my life, I became the “driven” - by forces and compulsions that I honestly felt I could not control or understand.

“Out of control, control,” one therapist said to me. I simply could not grasp that concept while I was drowning in the “out of control” reality. All I knew, for sure, was that every morning I desperately prayed for help to not binge. However, at the end of the day I had binged, often throwing up over 100 times.

The intense fear of becoming the recipient of someone’s anger and 64 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

disapproval has controlled my life since childhood. If “they” were angry at me, I was not “safe.” I was focused, at all costs, on trying to construct my behavior so as not to erupt the anger of significant people in my life.

The problem was, I could not find a “recipe” that worked with consistency. Life was like walking on thin ice. One day my words and actions might be considered funny. The next day they might evoke a crucifying anger. I simply could not figure it out. And, I could not tolerate living in the anxiety of the unknown.

Safer To Create My Own “Safe Hell”

Multiple therapists said I could not “heal” unless I brought my parents into therapy. They said, “It is often the healthiest person in an unhealthy environment who develops the symptoms.” I would have no part of that.

I insisted it had nothing to do with them. It was “safer” to create my own “safe hell” than risk involving them. Out of control, control.

The paradox is fascinating. What I sought and craved at the deepest level was a feeling of control, safety and peace. And, because I could not tolerate the anxiety of not knowing when the “bomb” of someone’s anger and disapproval was going to destroy me, I created my own “out of control, control.” Yes, it was horrible, but it was safer to hate and be angry at myself than it was to risk expressing myself to others. I could stay quiet and let “them” be “right.” Yet, when I walked away, I passionately expressed myself, with great power and force, through food.

So maybe it was true -- that the all-consuming battles I fought within myself and with food were “out of control, control.” I can see now that by hating myself and blaming only myself for my crazy behavior, I injected an element (although hidden) of control, safety and hope. It was “safe” to pour out my pent-up frustrations, anger and hate onto myself and onto food. It was not safe to confront the authority figures in my life.

First Step To Healing Is Acceptance

Now, 30 years later, I understand and I know what it takes to heal.

Healing was never the result of applying more willpower, self-beatings or the blind acceptance of “sick” labels. The first step to healing is Acceptance.

You must love yourself where you are NOW to get to where you want to be -- and stay there. To think that you will love yourself when you are “perfect,” is like sitting in your car in Georgia, wanting to be in California, and vowing not to put gas into the tank until you are in California! It’s crazy! The gas is what you need to get you there! True acceptance and authentic LOVE for yourself is exactly what you need NOW to stop the inner wars and self-beatings.

Love Heals, Whipping Does Not

When I refused to create and participate in my own “self wars and beatings,” my old, beloved binging behaviors naturally lost their appeal. I honestly, and surprisingly, did not want to do them anymore! It felt like a miracle, after 30 years of intense inner battles. Paradoxically, when I decided to “quit the war” that I could not win, I discovered peace and victory.

Give yourself a loving chance to discover and BE WHO YOU ARE! You are one of a kind! The world is waiting for you! Find someone to work with. Find someone whom you do not feel judged by negatively.

Trust yourself to know who that “right person” is. Listen to yourself. Believe in yourself. And remember this: “Love Heals, Whipping Does Not.” If Patti’s battle describes you or someone you care about, email Bonnie Church at simplewellness@charter.net for some resources to help you overcome.

Send questions/comments about this article to: comments@aawmag.com.

October is: October 1-5 Godspell, Lees-McRae College, Hayes Auditorium. Directed by Dr. Janet Speer; Oct. 1 - 3, at 7:30 pm; Oct. 4, 8 pm, Oct. 5, 2 pm October 2-12 Moonshine And Thunder: The Junior Johnson Story, presented by Wilkes Playmakers at Fort Hamby Park, N. Wilkesboro, (336) 838-PLAY October 3 Downtown Boone Art Crawl October 3-12 The Tempest, the last play written by Shakespeare, has been called a comedy, a fantasy, and a romance. Hayes Performing Arts Center, Hwy. 321 Business, in Blowing Rock. Call (828) 295-9627 for details.

October 3-Nov 1 Tweetsie Railroad Ghost Train - Safe, scary and fun for the whole family!

Friday and Saturday nights only - advance tickets recommended. Call (800) 526 -5740 for details.

October 4 Mountainhome Music, 8 pm, Blowing Rock School Auditorium. International Bluegrass - Johnny Possum and Good Time Hootin’ Band (from New Zealand) October 4 ASU Football game vs The Citadel (Homecoming), 2:30 pm, Kidd Brewer Stadium October 4 Rumple Memorial Presbyterian Church Artisan Festival, 9:00 am - 3:00 pm, 1218 N Main Street, Blowing Rock, (828)-2957675. Annual fundraiser benefiting various charities in the High Country featuring crafts, bake sale, hot dog sale, and public auction.

October 4 Art In The Park Downtown Blowing Rock, American Legion Grounds, 10 am - 5 pm. Award-winning juried art/fine handcrafts; showcases 100 exhibitors. Call (800) 295-7851 October 4-5 Autumn at Oz All Day, Beech Mountain. Take a nostalgic stroll down the Yellow Brick Road and share memories of Oz: Tour Aunt Em and Uncle Henry’s farm, meet Dorothy and friends along the Yellow Brick Road. Concessions, Oz trivia, small petting zoo, mini-Oz museum, mountain music, etc. Admission charged.

For more information, contact Beech Mountain Chamber of Commerce. (800) 468-5506.

October 11 Festival of the Frescoes 9 am 4 pm, Mission House at Holy Trinity Church, Glendale Springs, 120 Glendale School Rd. West Jefferson. Arts & crafts, bake sale, entertainment, handmade quilt raffle. Call (336) 8778090 for details.

October 11 Mountainhome Music 8 pm, Blowing Rock School Auditorium, David Johnson & The Studio Band October 11 Appalachian Craft Day 7 am - noon, Horn in the West parking lot, Boone.

Demonstrations of local crafting techniques including spinning and weaving by Blue Ridge Fiber Guild. Call (828) 297-1914 for details.

Adopt a Shelter Dog Month www.aspca.org National Domestic Violence Awareness Month www.ncadv.org

October 11-28 Annual Apple Festival at the Horn, 9 am - 4pm, Horn in the West Dr. Call (828) 264-2120 for details.

October 11 Sugar Mountain’s 18th Annual Oktoberfest, 10 am - 5 pm. Fall foliage, scenic lift rides, crafts, children’s fun center, Oom Pah Band, Bavarian cuisine and beverages. Admission free, parking convenient. Rain or shine. For additional information: (828) 898-4521 or visit ww.skisugar.com/oktoberfest.

October 17-November 2 Lies & Legends, The Musical Stories of Harry Chapin, Hayes Performing Arts Center, Hwy 321 Business, in Blowing Rock. (828) 295-9627 for details.

October 18 Mountainhome Music, 8 pm, Blowing Rock School Auditorium, Bluegrass & the Blues: Strictly Clean & Decent October 18-19 Woolly Worm Festival 10 am - 5 pm, Banner Elk Elementary School. Named one of the Top Ten Fall Festivals in North America by the Society of American Travel Writers!

Crafts, food, mountain music and the world famous caterpillar races to determine which woolly worm will have the honor of predicting the winter weather forecast! $5 for adults and $2 for kids 6 - 12. Children 5 and under are fee.

No pets. Call (828)-898-5605 October 18 - 30th Annual Valle Country Fair, 9 am- 4 pm, Hwy. 194 in Valle Crucis, mountain music, handmade crafts, tasty barbecue, Brunswick stew and so much more in scenic mountain setting; fundraiser for local charities. Free admission, $5 on-site parking. Call (828) 963-4609.

October 25 ASU Football Game vs Furman 3:30 p.m., Kidd Brewer Stadium (Black Saturday) October 25 Blowing Rock Halloween Festival, Downtown. Great fun for the kids! Enjoy an afternoon of games, hayrides, airwalks, and the Monster March. Wrap it up with trick-or-treating, a costume contest, and moonlight scavenger hunting.

October 30 Shrine Circus Three-Ring Show, 4:30 pm and 7:30 pm, Holmes Convocation Center, ASU Campus October 31 Halloween!

4th Annual Trunk or Treat Banner Elk Park 5:30 pm - 8:00 pm. Bring candy to hand out, this is like Trick or Treating at your own house. If you own a business and would like to advertise out of your car/truck and hand out candy, feel free.

October 31 ASU Football Game vs Woford, 8 pm, Kidd Brewer Stadium

Go

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National Breast Cancer Awareness Month www.nbcam.org Emotional Awareness Month

Do you have a special upcoming event?

Send us a note to: comments@aawmag. com and we’ll add it to that month’s calendar page! aawmag.com • OCTOBER • 65

66 • OCTOBER • aawmag.com

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