Mountain Xpress, Nomember 30 2011

OUR 18TH YEAR OF WEEKLY INDEPENDENT NEWS, ARTS, & EVENTS FOR WESTERN NORTH CAROLINA VOL. 18 NO. 19 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011

Council takes heat for Civic Center deal p. 10

Will the postal service cut out Asheville? p. 14

Party at Xpress’ Best Of Bash p. 62

p. 36

NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

The more twists and turns, the better the tale.

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Looking for a place to take the whole gang (somewhere away from your house?) Charcuterie just might be your answer. In the second installment of our holiday series, we look at where to take the fam and friends, how to find local gifts for the foodie and which types of wines to drink (affordably) this holiday season. Well, and more, of course.

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Cover design by Carrie Lare Photograph by Bill Rhodes

commentary 9 iDENtity thEft

Taking Asheville off the postal map

news

0 AshEVillE City COuNCil

Asheville Civic Center out, U.S. Cellular Center in

AN OpEN AND shut CAsE

Join your family and friends at the

Resident, employees protest proposed closure of mail-processing facility

arts&entertainment

21st AnnuAl tree of lights

56 ”tRADitiON is AlwAys MAllEABlE”

on Main Street in Downtown Hendersonville

Irish guitarist John Doyle writes his own history on new solo album

58 fROM BEiRut, with lOVE

fridAy, december 2, 2011

The old-world indie-pop band has a soft spot for Asheville

5:30 pm: Enjoy complimentary refreshments 6:00 pm: Tree lighting ceremony begins

59 tOO COMplEx tO BE lABElED Looking at the influence of John Cage

6 BEst Of BAsh — A spECtACulARiuM

Purchase lights and luminaries at: www.treeoflights.com For more information, contact Derek Groves at dgroves@FourSeasonsCFL.org or Claudia Polancich at 233-0304 or cpolancich@FourSeasonsCFL.org

Celebrate the winners of this year’s Xpress readers’ poll

features 5 7 8 6 7

6 7 8

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lEttERs CARtOON: MOltON CARtOON: BRENt BROwN COMMuNity CAlENDAR gEtAwAy Out and about in WNC fREEwill AstROlOgy AshEVillE DisClAiMER CONsCiOus pARty Benefits NEws Of thE wEiRD wEllNEss Health+wellness news gREEN sCENE returns next week sMAll BitEs Local food news pROfilER Which shows to see sMARt BEts What to do, who to see CluBlAND CRANky hANkE Movie reviews ClAssifiEDs CARtOON: DERf Ny tiMEs CROsswORD

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NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

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letters My kind of representative Rep. Patrick McHenry made his first “public” appearance in Asheville with a talk before the Council of Independent Business Owners [“The Beat,” Nov. 16 Xpress]. McHenry is following the sinister Republican game plan: stay away from announced, truly open-to-the-public events, where he would face the anger and criticism that he deserves. The GOP’s unapologetic, pro-wealth, pro-corporate dogma will not “play” before diverse audiences. So, they take the corporate money (often scammed from the public with the help of Congress) and limit their in-district exposure to scripted TV ads, usually negative, and to events such as the recent one in Asheville.

Ain’t representative government great? By the way, if the GOP earns an “F” in this regard, then the Dems get a “D.” — Bill Bates Fairview

The postal service is just that — a service According to the Constitution, Congress has the power “to establish post offices and post roads.” It is clear from the context that post offices were not considered a business any more than roads were. Nor were they expected to make money. They were and are a service to our society, in the same way that roads are. In the same section of the Constitution (Section 8), Congress was given the power of taxation to pay for these services and the other costs of government.

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That is why it is outrageous that today the U.S. Postal Service, which even claims “service” as its last name, is being treated like a business rather than a governmental service. Its management is being forced by Congress to make major cuts in this service, reducing the speed of local mail delivery from one to three days and resulting in the loss of jobs at exactly the time when that is bad for the economy, worse for the country and absolutely devastating for the people whose jobs disappear.

Judging from the Nov. 21 meeting in Asheville on the subject of moving the Brevard Road central processing center from Asheville to Greenville, S.C., 100 percent of the people of this community are totally against this plan.

Not a single individual, of the 200 or so who attended, spoke in favor of this move, aside from the Postal Service managers who made the presentation.

We were told that the decision to move is not final and that the Postal Service will truly consider the public reaction to the proposed move. If that is true, there is no way the USPS would approve this move after hearing the comments from the meeting. If the people who they serve mean anything to them, if the future of the Postal Service and of our country means anything to them, the USPS will not approve the move of the Brevard Road distribution facility to Greenville, or any other similar diminution of service elsewhere in the United States.

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staff PuBLISHER & EDITOR: Jeff Fobes hhh GENERAL MANAGER: Andy Sutcliffe SENIOR EDITOR: Peter Gregutt hhh MANAGING EDITORS: Rebecca Sulock, Margaret Williams A&E REPORTER & FASHION EDITOR: Alli Marshall h SENIOR NEWS REPORTER: David Forbes FOOD WRITER: Mackensy Lunsford STAFF REPORTER: Jake Frankel GREEN SCENE REPORTER: Susan Andrew EDITORIAL ASSISTANT, SuPPLEMENT COORDINATOR & WRITER: Jaye Bartell CALENDAR EDITOR, WRITER: Jen Nathan Orris CLuBLAND EDITOR, WRITER: Dane Smith CONTRIBuTING WRITERS: Miles Britton, Melanie McGee Bianchi, Caitlin Byrd, Max Cooper, Megan Dombroski, Anne Fitten Glenn, ursula Gullow, Bill Rhodes, Kyle Sherard, Justin Souther CONTRIBuTING EDITORS: Nelda Holder, Tracy Rose CONTRIBuTING ARTS EDITOR: ursula Gullow EDITORIAL INTERNS: Tess Kuulei Satsuma PRODuCTION & DESIGN MANAGER: Carrie Lare ADVERTISING PRODuCTION MANAGER: Kathy Wadham hh PRODuCTION & DESIGN: Emily Busey, Nathanael Roney

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our livelihood. Our clean air and lush mountains foster the tourism economy that so many of us, including me, depend on.

If businesses had to pay the actual costs of the ecological damage and health problems resulting from their pollution emissions, perhaps this debate would finally be put to rest. Air regulations may result in a cost for corporations, but pollution and chemical contamination always result in a cost for people and our communities and sometimes it’s fatal.

— Maryann Palazzolo Thank you for publishing the Green Scene Policy Intern for the Southern article “Into Thin Air” by Susan Andrew [Nov. 8 Alliance for Clean Energy Xpress]. The ongoing debate about pollution regAsheville ulation, while sometimes frustrating and seemingly redundant, is very critical in a time when corporations seem to pull more weight than peo I have recently learned of a very impresple. I was pleased that the article revealed both sive positive community organization in south sides of the argument: those who believe regulaAsheville. The Ducker Road Community tion hurts businesses and costs too much for little Involvement Council, which is a 501(c)3 organipayback as well as those who understand the zation, has worked to “clean up” an entire neighthreats from pollution and the many cost-saving borhood, making it positively uninhabitable for health benefits that regulations generate. drug dealers, providing community programs I fear we are sliding backwards in terms of for youth and even offering several people tranenvironmental concern in this country even sitional housing. though clean air is an investment that pays off All of this was done primarily by one man: over time. We should not lessen regulations in Mr. Cookie Mills. He started the DRCIC seven blind pursuit of profits. The net cost savings of years ago, when he realized that somebody had health benefits alone are enough to offset the to do something, that the children and families in costs of implementing regulations. Moreover, his neighborhood were in crisis. The information eliminating the Air Toxics Programs won’t pamphlet provided by the DRCIC shows picprovide a solution to our economic problems. tures of the children and families that they have Eliminating that policy would only put us at a helped, and are a home-printed labor of love. higher risk for exposure to chemicals known to Every year, the DRCIC has a 7-mile march cause birth defects, cancer, respiratory illness, down Airport Road to raise awareness of the heart attacks, premature death and asthma. A problems that drugs bring into people’s lives real solution would be to build a sustainable and as a show that drug crime will not be tolereconomic system that promotes financial cirated in Arden. culation through our communities, and not in Mills informed me that he had a really difthe confines of the stock market or lobbyists. As ficult time getting any media support for the citizens of this country, we have the right and work he does — with the help of his wife, his the duty to remind our elected leaders what neighbors, and a few friends who help out a lot we value. The beautiful landscape of our state — toward making south Asheville a better place is worth protecting both for our well-being and If you agree, write before Dec. 6 to the Manager, Consumer and Industry Contact U.S. Postal Service, Mid-Carolinas District, 2901 Scott Futrell Drive, Charlotte, NC 28228-9976. Your first-class letter should get there in one day now.

If the move goes through, it will take three.

— Fred Flaxman Weaverville

Clean air is an investment that pays off over time

Something is up in south Asheville

6

NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

For other Molton cartoons, check out our Web page at www.mountainx.com/cartoons for children to grow up. He said that he had tried to get a little news coverage for the march, but that most media sources didn’t even call him back.

As a resident of Buncombe County who enjoys hearing about people doing important and empowering work, especially at a grassroots level, it seems to me that people could be inspired to participate in their own communities by learning about people who have faced the challenge of promoting sustainable social change.

I see a lot of stories about locals doing good work, but a lot of people get left out. There are so many good people doing such good work in Asheville and in WNC. Why don’t we ever hear about them? Have Mills tell you about the time the dope dealer was threatening to shoot him in the head. It’s a good story. Thank you for consideration of the importance of inclusiveness in our media.

— Faith R. Rhyne Asheville

Protecting principals over children A story in the Nov. 17 News and Observer, “N.C. shifts school crimes law,” makes me wonder if we have lost our collective minds in North Carolina (read the article at avl.mx/prot). Our legislators and governor signed into law the decriminalization of school principals reporting suspected crimes, including sex offenses. It should not only be a crime but a felony crime to not report childhood sexual abuse. How could this bill become law? There was only one (yes one) dissenting vote. It is extremely weakminded thinking that this “… will encourage principals to report more legitimately serious crimes without having to worry about being prosecuted themselves for not passing along every rumored instance of misbehavior.” What could be a more legitimately serious crime than child sexual abuse? Once again child sexual abuse is being minimized.

Why shouldn’t principals be afraid of pros-

ecution? The fear of prosecution in and of itself is a substantial deterrent. Principals are educators and leaders of schools. When did they become experts in law enforcement? When did they become judge and jury of what should be reported? We already have a system in place that is staffed with experts — they are called the police. They are the trained professionals, not the principals. What kind of convoluted logic is used to give principals “breathing room to find out if it is worth reporting”? Equating the sexual abuse of a child to the stealing of a pencil or ice cream sandwich is a direct insult to all of us who have been sexually abused.

How can Gov. Purdue sign this bill into law watering down the already weak laws protecting our children? This in no way helps any child feel more protected. Big deal you could lose your job if you are principal. So what? SB394 protects principals over the protection of children. It just weakens an already weak system.

This new law should be repealed immediately and be replaced with a law that makes it a felony crime for anyone to not report a suspected sexual abuse. Our children deserve to be put first.

Everyone with children should be writing their legislators and Gov. Perdue to demand that this is law be reversed. If someday, heaven forbid, they have an issue of this nature, the law will already be in place and their child will be safer.

— Charles L. Bailey Jr. Fuquay Varina, N.C.

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commentary Identity theft

Taking Asheville off the postal map I sometimes used to ride the mail route with my daddy when I was a little girl. Mother would pack us a lunch, and I would meet him when he came down Highway 50 to my grandmother’s country store. I got to sit in the back seat on top of the sorted mail, which was bound by leather straps.

I would hand him the next package he needed as we traveled the route through eastern Wake County.

At lunchtime we’d stop at the Old Drugstore, a county landmark and gathering spot, where the owner’s dog could drink Coca-Cola out of a bottle, sitting up on his haunches. We’d buy our own drinks and stop by the river bridge to eat our sandwiches. Then we’d finish delivering the mail.

That’s a favorite childhood memory from decades ago. But Daddy got promoted and wound up in the post office proper as a clerk, then as acting postmaster. Throughout his various jobs, I saw firsthand his dedication to his duties and to the people of our community. He would delay our own family activities if it meant getting a much-wanted or necessary package delivered to

of mail-processing plants nationwide from the current 500 or so to less than 200 by 2013.

The only way the Postal Service can consolidate these facilities and “optimize the machines” (keep them working around the clock sorting mail) is to lower its delivery standards. So instead of overnight service, first-class mail in Western North Carolina will take two to three days to arrive (and potentially longer, as several people testified).

Ostensibly, all this is planned so the Postal Service can tighten its belt in response to declining demand for first-class mail service, which is the agency’s bread and butter. But as more than one astute public commenter observed, it’s a questionable business model when you sacrifice service standards for the one thing that so directly affects your bottom line. And it was unsettling that the management representatives at this public meeting couldn’t speak to the potential loss of revenue due to reducing the quality of service. That didn’t seem to be a factor they’d even considered.

One retired mail carrier who spoke during the evening — a 37-year veteran — summed it up pretty well. “The bottom line here is money: You’ve got one product to sell, and it’s service.

The Paris of the South won’t get her name splashed on postcards or first-class mail unless the sender wants to go into a post office and request a hand stamp. someone after hours. Proud of his mail-sorting accuracy and speed, he would stop to help anyone for as long as they needed when they entered the post office door. It was personal, not “by the book” service.

The Nov. 21 hearing on the proposed closure of Asheville’s mail-processing plant was by the book.

Full of postal acronyms and talk of efficiency, the formal introductions and slide presentation took up the first half-hour, leaving only one hour for public comment from a large, feisty audience. Each person who took the microphone was allowed to ask one question; direct answers were in short supply. And the 8 o’clock cutoff time was an arbitrary choice; the building was open until 9 p.m. I know, because I stayed till then. (More about that later.)

The Postal Service representatives spoke dispassionately about consolidating the Asheville plant and a larger facility in Greenville, S.C. They couched it in terms of “revised entry times” and “reduced footprint” and “fully utilized work forces.” And — my favorite quote of the evening — the repeated management goal to “optimize the machines.” In simplest terms, the U.S. Postal Service is looking at what they call a “radical network realignment” that would slash the number

My question is, how come you’re not concentrating on service? I’ve seen it getting worse, and I’m appalled. It’s crazy. ... Please put the ‘service’ back in the Postal Service.”

But the moderator immediately channeled that request back into the parlance of the day, saying, “We do want to be [financially] sound. We’re in dire straits for cash liquidity.”

And pointedly, a number of independent businesspeople asked about the effects of closing the Asheville plant on bulk mail, political mail and the delivery of orders, goods and payments. One attorney, concerned about his legal mail, asked, “Can you guarantee next-day delivery in the city of Asheville?”

The answer? “The overnight [service] would become a two-day service.”

Meanwhile, at the social level, this machineefficient service will also cost us an Asheville postmark. The Paris of the South won’t get her name splashed on postcards or first-class mail unless the sender wants to go into a post office and request a hand stamp. In terms of mail origin, all of Western North Carolina’s towns will become “Greenville, S.C.” A few minutes after 8 p.m., the moderator closed the session, despite many protests from the

audience. The microphones were turned off, and the public began to filter out the door.

There, they were met by a telling juxtaposition.

Occupy Asheville had assembled in a corner of the lobby and was holding forth with a spirited round of discussion. Anyone could speak, and what they had to say was then repeated by the entire group, in bite-size phrases — a process known as “mike check” that’s designed to intentionally hear and amplify the public voice. Not quite the style of hearing that had just played out inside the auditorium.

Attracted by that cooperative spirit, a number of people leaving the auditorium stayed on until the whole group left the building promptly at 9 p.m., to “honor A-B Tech,” as they put it. And by that time, the heretofore strangers gathered on the edges of the crowd had started participating in the singsong repetition of comments.

I also saw at least one local lawyer, two elected officials, some postal union members, a self-confessed Republican and a dozen or more all-purpose citizens among this small crowd. I’m guessing not one of them came to Ferguson Auditorium that night expecting to participate in an Occupy Asheville rally, but they’d found interesting common ground.

I wonder what my daddy would have thought of Occupy Asheville? In his day, he did befriend the hippies that moved into an abandoned homestead in our community. And with his penchant for getting along with anyone, he might at least have paused and heard them say, in unison, “I think the Postal Service deserves a round of applause.” X Nelda Holder can be reached at nfholder@gmail.com.

The U.S. Postal Service is accepting public comment by mail only; comments must be postmarked by Dec. 6. Send comments to: Manager, Consumer & Industry Contact, Mid-Carolinas District, 2901 Scott Futrell Drive, Charlotte, NC 28228-9976.

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Asheville City Council members wrestled with two conflicting arguments during their Nov. 22 meeting: “We need money to repair the aging Civic Center, and selling naming rights to a corporate sponsor helps achieve that,” versus “Putting a corporate name on a civic facility is betraying the very heart of the city for little gain.”

“We need money” won.

Council voted 6-1 to rename the Asheville Civic Center the U.S. Cellular Center, though other interested parties have until Dec. 31 to submit an upset bid. Built in 1974, the Civic Center was funded by city taxpayers.

U.S. Cellular has offered $810,000 over five years, though that could grow to $1.35 million over eight years if the city agrees to a three-year extension. In return, the company will get signs facing Interstate 240 and Haywood Street, event and product space inside, and its logo on everything from promotional materials to staff attire. sam Powers, who wears two hats as the city’s director of economic development and Civic Center director, touted the deal as part of ongoing efforts to fund renovations the city committed to making in its bid to host the Southern Conference basketball tournament for the next three years. Other staffers concurred.

Several Council members apologized for not making the negotiating process more public, and Vice Mayor Brownie Newman added the condition concerning upset bids to encourage other groups to come forward. There’s been considerable public backlash since the deal was announced Nov. 10. Council member Cecil Bothwell (who cast the lone “no” vote) said he’d received nearly 200 emails overwhelmingly opposing the idea.

Newman, however, called the deal an improvement after years of many in the community considering the Civic Center a lost cause. “It’s a lot more attractive possibility than it was five years ago,” he asserted. “Naming rights are an appropriate part of an overall financial strategy for the city. This is change, and people can be resistant to that, oftentimes for good reason. But I do think it’s important we make sure we have a process where we’re getting the best possible value for the city of Asheville.”

Many people opposed to the deal expressed the selfsame sentiment during the contentious

0 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Limited choices: Voicing support for the U.S. Cellular deal, Vice Mayor Brownie Newman asserted that the city has limited options for funding improvements to the 37-year-old Asheville Civic Center. Photos by Max Cooper

A bad idea: Asheville resident Paul Van Heden compared the Civic Center deal to a parent tattooing the U.S. Cellular logo on a daughter’s head in exchange for college cash.

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011

“U.S. Cellular wants to ride the coattails of our public investments.”

— Asheville resident PAul vAn heden

public-comment period in the latter portion of the nearly six-hour Council meeting.

“U.S. Cellular wants to ride the coattails of our public investments,” Paul van Heden told Council. “Not only does selling the naming rights not address the Civic Center’s financial needs, it will make it harder to actually address these issues in the future. To fully fund the Civic Center, this body will eventually have to raise parking fees, demand that Buncombe County actually put in some money, a bond referendum or do some serious lobbying on raising the occupancy tax. All these real solutions that will really solve the problem will require that voters instinctively understand the Civic Center belongs to them.”

Van Heden compared the deal to a parent tattooing the U.S. Cellular logo on a daughter’s head to help fund her college education.

“It seems like it’s free money, but it does come with a price: You’re selling more than the name here,” argued Asheville resident Mark Bloom. “Now it’s the Civic Center; what next?

Pack-Bell Square? McDonald’s Cafeteria, BB&T Classrooms teaching Ayn Rand? It’s a very slippery slope. I’m disappointed Asheville’s not putting up more of a fight. This isn’t Charlotte; we’re not Winnipeg. We’re Asheville, and this is one of our defining characteristics.”

Amelia spangler called the Civic Center “the soul of Asheville”; renaming it after a corporation, she maintained, would betray that.

Some speakers, however, supported the deal.

“The improvements we’re making for the Southern Conference will allow us to bring bigger-name acts here,” Civic Center Commission Chair Mike Burke told Council. “These conversations go back to 1997,” he noted. “We have before us a tangible action by an internationally recognized firm. They’re willing to give us money and technology; there’s no cost to the city here. … If you don’t endorse this, what does it say to [U.S. Cellular]?”

Former Mayor lou Bissette also endorsed the deal, saying he recalls facility’s opening and sees the deal as an important step in its revival.

Council member Jan davis, who’s played a major role in brokering various deals for Civic Center renovations, said he believes at least as many city residents support the deal: They just haven’t been as vocal as the detractors.

Council member esther Manheimer said that while she understands opponents’ concerns, “When you sit up here, you feel the great burden of two things: making sure we have all the services we need and not raising property taxes.

“To those who say no way should we put the name of any corporation on the Civic Center, you are telling me to raise your property taxes: I’m not going to do that,” asserted Manheimer, though she did say the city should revisit how open the negotiating process was.

NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Bothwell, however, shot back, calling the specter of raising taxes “a red herring” considering the relatively modest amount of money U.S. Cellular would provide.

Raising a comparable amount, argued Bothwell, “would cost about $5 a year on a tax bill for a $175,000 house; we’re not talking about big tax increases. This is not a big deal: The maintenance costs for the Civic Center are above $2.1 million a year,” he continued. “We could add a dollar to parking fees or ticket fees; there’s a lot of ways to make this money up without selling the name of our Civic Center.”

Condemning the deal in no uncertain terms, Bothwell challenged the very idea of selling naming rights. “We’re in a very different time here than we were in 2001,” he said, arguing that people want corporate influence in government reduced. “Something this central to the city, people need to have a voice in whether we put a corporate name on that insitution.”

Council member Gordon smith countered that the city has limited options for raising money to fix the Civic Center, given the restrictions on how it can use water revenues and state legislators’ refusal to increase the city’s hotel/motel room tax.

In the end, only Bothwell opposed the deal, which will take effect Jan. 1 unless another entity offers the city a sweeter deal.

Other business Council members also: • unanimously approved closing an unused right of way between Nebraska Street and Nevada Avenue in West Asheville. Eleven of the 13 immediate neighbors requested the closure after another neighbor began tearing down trees in the area.

• narrowly approved The Aventine, a 312unit apartment complex on Long Shoals Road, on a 4-3 vote. Bothwell, Smith and Newman voted against the project, which is in the city’s extraterritorial jurisdiction, citing the lack of affordable-housing units. Because of the close vote, the project must pass a second reading at Council’s Dec. 13 meeting.

• heard a report from outgoing ABC board Chair Charles Worley concerning the corruption charges that had led to CEO Curtis Canty’s resignation in September. Worley, a former Asheville mayor, said the board had acted quickly and that the problems concerning credit card misuse and gifts from liquor companies had not affected day-to-day operations. The board, he said, had already put guidelines in place this summer to prevent future ethical lapses.

Bothwell, however, maintained that the entire ABC board had failed in its oversight function and should resign. X David Forbes can be reached at 251-1333, ext.

137, or dforbes@mountainx.com.

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011

news X the beat around town

An open-And-shut cAse

Residents, empLoyees pRotest pRoposed cLosuRe of mAiL-pRocessing fAciLity

by Jake frankel Ashevilleans want the U.S. Postal Service to keep its Brevard Road mailprocessing facility open. That was the message from the roughly 200 folks who attended a Nov. 21 public hearing on the cost-cutting proposal.

If approved, the closure would cut at least 22 positions and move 180 jobs out of Asheville, mostly to a mailprocessing center in Greenville, S.C. All Asheville-area mail — even items simply being sent across town — would be routed through Greenville, officials told the crowd at A-B Tech’s Ferguson Auditorium.

The change is part of a national “radical network realignment.”

speaking up: A steady flow of speakers, including Asheville Mayor Terry Bellamy, far right, lined up to tell U.S. Postal Service officials that they shouldn’t close the Brevard Road mail-processing facility. Photos by Bill Rhodes Angela curtis, district manager for the mid-Carolinas, said the federal agency has been gradually reducing the number of mail-processing plants nationwide from 673 (in 2006) to less than 200 by 2013.

The goal, she said, is to “optimize the machines” (keep them working around the clock sorting mail).

To facilitate these changes, the Postal Service would also lower mail-delivery standards. Instead of overnight service for first-class

mail, the goal would be a two- or three-day turnaround, she said. Due to the Internet and other factors, the volume of first-class mail (which is responsible for the majority of the agency’s revenue) has declined sharply, Curtis explained, and the Postal Service must tighten its belt.

Here’s what some residents had to say about the proposal, plus a response from Curtis (for more, see the full online post at avl.mx/prov).

Angela curtis, usps district manager A 2006 law requiring the Postal Service to prepay pensions for the next 75 years “was not the total issue. ... Transportation ... is a huge cost. ... As we continue to optimize the network, that will allow us to fill the trucks up instead of transporting at 47 percent capacity. ... We have a no-layoff clause. ... We reposition; we move temporary employees. ...

“There are residual jobs available throughout portions of Western North Carolina. ... The company has not been filling jobs when people retire...

“Almost all of you are praising the Asheville plant, and they do a phenomenal job. It was never about their work ethic or their commitment. ...

This is one of the many options to consider nationwide to make the post office more effective. ... It’s not a done deal yet.”

NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

chris Wallace Xpress contributor nelda holder “My question has to do with the area and terrain that we live in. You’re going to have all the mail from this area going down the Saluda Grade and back up in winter. And I want to know why you would want to configure it that way and not keep Asheville and Western North Carolina as a complete unit and not add that risk to drivers?”

“Obviously our service in Western North Carolina is going to suffer if you close this plant. You say right here in the flier you handed out that the study is looking for ways to improve service and save money. I don’t see how it will save money, because you’re going to be paying Greenville employees to do the work instead of Asheville employees. ... Why are you putting money as the bottom line in this decision when we’re a public service?”

Linda Labelle “I have a small business here in Asheville. … In a good year, I can do $15,000 in business with the post office. … My customers rely and count on the fact that I can do a quick turnaround. What’s going to happen if you move to Greenville?”

Asheville mayor terry Bellamy “The City Council supports federal House resolution 1351 to preserve and secure the current level of mail service to the citizens of Asheville and Western North Carolina … and I’m submitting it to you now.”

carol orengo grove Alexander “I’ve been employed by the USPS since 1981.

Anybody that has the kind of time in that I do knows that this is a done deal: This is going to Greenville. This is a formality.”

“The 2006 law that passed requiring the USPS to prepay pensions for the next 75 years. It seems like that’s when your downslope started. And I think if it wasn’t for that, the post office would be in the black.”

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 5

calendar

your guide to community events, classes, concerts & galleries

calendar categories community events & workshops / social & shared-interest groups / government & politics / seniors & retirees / animals / technology / business & careers / volunteering / health programs / support groups / helplines / sports groups & activities / kids / spirituality / arts / spoken & written word / festivals & gatherings / music / theater / comedy / film / dance / auditions & call to artists calEndaR FoR novEmbER 30 dEcEmbER 8, 2011 Unless otherwise stated, events take place in Asheville, and phone numbers are in the 828 area code.

Day-by-day calendar is online Want to find out everything that’s happening today — or tomorrow, or any day of the week?

Go to www.mountainx. com/events.

Weekday Abbreviations: SU = Sunday, MO = Monday, TU = Tuesday, WE = Wednesday, TH = Thursday, FR = Friday, SA = Saturday

Animals Brother Wolf Animal Rescue A no-kill organization.

Info: www.bwar.org or 505-3440.

• DAILY, 8am-8pm - Pet Adoption Day at the rescue center, 31 Glendale Ave. Open from 8am-6pm on Sundays.

• SA (12/3), 9am-5pm & SU (12/4), noon-5pm - Pet photography from Flying Dogs Photography and Asheville Area Professional Pet Sitters Association. $10 for 15 minute session and one 5x7 print. Info and registration: sherylmann@ charter.net.

• SA (12/3), 10am-noon - A free rabies clinic will be held at the Eblen Short Stop gas station, 217 Amboy Road.

Community Partnership for Pets This nonprofit’s primary goal is to provide affordable spay/neuter services to communities in/around Henderson County. Info: www.communitypart-

Calendar deadlines:

*FREE and PaId lIstIngs - WEdnEsday, 5 P.m.

(7 days PRIoR to PublIcatIon) Can’t find your group’s listing?

Due to the abundance of great things to do in our area, we only have the space in print to focus on timely events. Our print calendar now covers an eight-day range. For a complete directory of all Community Calendar groups and upcoming events, please visit www.mountainx.com/events..

Calendar information In order to qualify for a free listing, an event must cost no more than $40 to attend and be sponsored by and/or benefit a nonprofit.

If an event benefits a business, it’s a paid listing.

If you wish to submit an event for Clubland (our free live music listings), please e-mail clubland@mountainx.com.

Free Listings To submit a free listing: * Online submission form (best): http://www.mountainx.com/ events/submission * E-mail (second best): calendar@mountainx.com * Fax (next best): (828) 251-1311, Attn: Free Calendar * Mail: Free Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 * In person: Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), second floor, downtown Asheville.

Please limit your submission to 40 words or less.

Questions? Call (828) 251-1333, ext. 365.

Paid Listings Paid listings lead the calendar sections in which they are placed, and are marked (pd.).

To submit a paid listing, send it to our Classified Department by any of the following methods. Be sure to include your phone number, for billing purposes. * E-mail: marketplace@mountainx.com. * Fax: (828) 251-1311, Attn: Commercial Calendar * Mail: Commercial Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 * In person: Classified Dept., Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), Ste. 214, downtown Asheville.

Questions? Call our Classified Department at (828) 251-1333, ext. 335.

nershipforpets.org or 693-5172.

• 4th SATURDAYS, 10am-2pm - Vouchers for free and low-cost spay/neuter services will be available to Henderson County residents at Tractor Supply Company, 115 Four Seasons Blvd., Hendersonville.

Pet Biggest Loser Contest • Through SU (5/20) - All Pets Animal Hospital and Rehabilitation Center will hold a Pet Biggest Loser Contest to promote a healthy lifestyle in pets.

Info: 645-5252.

Art aRt 16 Patton Located at 16 Patton Ave. Gallery hours: Tues.-Sat., 11am-6pm and Sun., 1-5pm. Info: www.16patton.com or 236-2889.

• FR (12/2) through SA (1/7) - Intersections, works by Signe and Genna Grushovenko, and Seasons on the French Broad, works by Linda Cheek.

• FR (12/2), 5-8pm Opening reception.

All Member Art Show • Through FR (1/6), The All Member Art Show will be held at Opportunity House, 1411 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville.

Info: www.artleague.net or 692-2078.

American Folk Art and Framing The gallery at 64 Biltmore Ave. is open daily, representing contemporary self-taught artists and regional pottery. Info: www.amerifolk.com or 281-2134.

• Through SA (12/31) - Virgins, Saints and Angels. 12 painters, wood carvers and potters will share their interpretation of the virgins, saints and angels for the holidays.

AntHM gallery Located at 110.5 W. State St. in downtown Black Mountain. Info: www.anthmgallery.com.

• Through TU (1/31) - Resurrection, works

by Amy Greenan, and Abstracts and Writings, works by Lou Majors.

Appalachian State University • Through SU (1/1) Sanctuary, works by Val Lyle. Info: stageme@ appstate.edu or 2626084.

• Through SU (1/1) - Living in the Light: A Retrospective, works by the late John Scarlata, will be on display in the Turchin Center for the Visual Arts. stageme@ appstate.edu or 2626084.

Art Events at WCU Held at the Fine Art Museum, Fine & Performing Arts Center on the campus of Western Carolina University. Hours: Mon.Fri., 10am-4pm & Thurs.

10am-7pm. Free, but donations welcome. Info: www.fineartmuseum. wcu.edu or 227-3591.

• Through FR (12/9) Exhi-beard-tion fall senior thesis exhibition for WCU art and design students.

• Through FR (12/9) - Bachelor of Fine Arts portfolio exhibit.

Asheville Art Museum Located on Pack Square in downtown Asheville.

Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am5pm and Sun., 1-5pm.

Admission: $8/$7 students and seniors/Free for kids under 4. Free first Wednesdays from 35pm. Info: www.ashevilleart.org or 253-3227.

• Through SU (3/18) - The New Materiality: Digital Dialogues at the Boundaries of Contemporary Craft.

• Through SU (3/4) Homage2 will pay tribute to Josef Albers.

Autumn in the Southern Appalachians • Through SU (1/1) Autumn and Winter in the Southern Appalachians, a juried exhibit of Carolina nature photographers, will be on display at Deerpark Inn at the Biltmore Estate, 1 Approach Road. Info: www.cnpa-asheville.org.

6 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

weeklypicks

* events are free unless otherwise noted.

Learn about the recently developed regional bicycle plan at a kickoff event featuring

wed speakers, a public input session and a light lunch on Wednesday, Nov. 30 from 10:30 a.m.2:30 p.m. Held at Haywood Community College’s High Tech Center, 112 Industrial Park Drive in Waynesville. Info: fbrmpo.org.

Enjoy the sounds of Dehlia Low and Every Mother’s Dream at a benefit concert for Women

thur at Risk on Thursday, Dec. 1 from 7-10 p.m. Held at Asheville Music Hall, 31 Patton Ave. $10.

Info: ashevillemusichall.com or wccj.org/womenatrisk.html.

fri

Join authors George and Elizabeth Ellison for a reading from their book High Vistas: An Anthology of Nature Writing from Western North Carolina and the Great Smokey Mountains on Friday, Dec. 2 from 6-8 p.m. at The Captain’s Bookshelf, 31 Page Ave. Info: 253-6631.

sat

Delve into the subconscious at an introductory dream interpretation workshop on Saturday, Dec. 3 from 12:30-1:30 p.m. at the Jewish Community Center, 236 Charlotte St. Bring a dream or dream fragment to develop during the meeting. Info: 253-0701.

sun

One Center Yoga, 120 Coxe Ave., Suite 3A, presents an open house and benefit event for Meals on Wheels on Sunday, Dec. 4 from 2:30-5 p.m. Bring toothbrushes, gloves, hats, playing cards or cotton handkerchiefs. Info: onecenteryoga.com.

Celebrate the repeal the 21st Amendment, which prohibited the consumption of alcohol, on

mon Monday, Dec. 5. The Thirsty Monk hosts the WNC debut of 21st Amendment Brewery beer, starting at 4 p.m. Held at the downtown location, 92 Patton Ave. Info: monkpub.com.

tue

See members of the Curtain Call collective perform selections from Beauty and The Beast Jr. on Tuesday, Dec. 6 from 6-7 p.m. Held at The Hop, 640 Merrimon Ave., Suite 103. Info: thehopicecreamcafe.com.

Bella Vista Art gallery Located in Biltmore Village next to the parking lot of Rezaz’s restaurant.

Summer hours: Mon., Wed.-Sat., 10am-5pm.

Info: www.bellavistaart. com or 768-0246.

• Through SA (12/31) - Spider Series, works by Paul Owen, Tif McDonald and Nicora Gangi.

Black Mountain College Museum + Arts Center The center is located at 56 Broadway and preserves the legacy of the Black Mountain College. Info: bmcmac@ bellsouth.net or www. blackmountaincollege.org or 350-8484.

• Through SA (1/14) - John Cage: A Circle of Influences will explore Cage’s work during his time at Black Mountain College and his later collaborative projects.

Castell Photography A photo-based art gallery located at 2C Wilson Alley, off Eagle Street in downtown Asheville. Info: www.castellphotography. com or 255-1188.

• FR (12/2) through SA (12/31) - Salon 2011,

works by twelve national and international photographers.

• FR (12/2), 6-8pm Opening reception.

Center For Craft, Creativity and Design Located at the Kellogg Conference Center, 11 Broyles Road in Hendersonville. Info: www.craftscreativitydesign.org or 890-2050.

• Through FR (1/27) Common Threads, works by four fiber artists who have collaborated with other artists or businesses.

Courtyard gallery An eclectic art and performance space located at 109 Roberts St., Phil Mechanic Studios, River Arts District. Info: www. ashevillecourtyard.com or 273-3332.

• Through SA (12/31) - Anything Goes Everything Shows, the 5th annual mail art show.

All entries received through the postal system will be exhibited.

Participants were encouraged to explore themes,

sizes, shapes and media of any kind.

First Friday • 1st FRIDAYS - Historic Downtown Hendersonville will host First Fridays, featuring in-store events and specials. Held throughout downtown.

Info: www.downtownhendersonville.org. it’s A Small, Small Work • Through FR (12/31) It’s A Small, Small Work will feature works that are 12 inches or smaller by over 100 regional artists. On display at Gallery 86 86 N. Main St. Info: info@haywoodarts.org or 452-0593.

Kelly Amundsen • Through SU (12/4) - Stone artwork by Kelly Amundsen will be on display at the First Congregational United Church of Christ, 20 Oak St. Info: 252-8729.

Pump gallery Located at the Phil Mechanic Studios Building in the River Arts District, 109 Roberts St. Info: www.philmechanicstudios.com.

• SA (12/3) through FR (12/30) - Madison J. Cripps (puppetry).

• SA (12/3), 7-10pm Opening reception.

Seven Sisters gallery This Black Mountain gallery is located at 117 Cherry St. Hours: Mon.Sat., 10am-6pm and Sun., noon-5pm. Info: www.sevensistersgallery. com or 669-5107.

• Through SU (3/11) - A Blue Ridge Rhapsody, works by Paul Hastings.

Study Abroad Photo Exhibit • Through WE (11/30) Study Abroad will feature the winners of the study abroad photo contest.

Held in UNCA’s Blowers Gallery in the Ramsey Library. Info: 251-6436. the Artery Community arts facility at 346 Depot St., River Arts District. Info: www. ashevillearts.com.

• SA (12/3), 7-9pm - Raising Our Voices Community Art Project documents the “lives and journeys of ‘new North Carolinians’ through a

getaway

Asheville-area escapes

stained glass, pottery and jewelry, oh my!

What: Pick up a guide and follow the little red line through the mountains of Mitchell and Yancey counties for a weekend of studio strolling. The Toe River Arts Council invites the public to see some topnotch artists in their elements. Learn how mugs, jugs, blown glass and basketry are made, and meet artists of all kinds. Art-lovers can visit studios at their own pace, stop for lunch in a beautiful setting and find gifts for their nearest and dearest.

When: Friday, Dec. 2, noon-4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 3, and Sunday, Dec. 4, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.

Where: Throughout Mitchell and Yancey counties price: Free contact: 765-0520 or toeriverarts.org for detailed map photos: Works by Rolf Holmquist and Stan Andersen

mountainx.com â&#x20AC;˘ NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 7

dynamic multi-media experience.”

• SA (12/3) through FR (12/30) - Nuestras Voces, Nuestras Historias/ Our Voices, Our Stories, works documenting immigrants in Western North Carolina.

SA (12/3), 7-9pm Opening reception. toe River Studio tour • FR (12/2) through SU (12/4) - A free self-guided tour of 100 studios and galleries in Burnsville, Spruce Pine, Bakersville and Little Switzerland. See website for times and locations.

Info: www.toeriverarts. org or 682-7215.

• FR (12/2), 5-7pm Opening reception will be held at Spruce Pine TRAC Gallery, 269 Oak Ave. Working girls Studio and gallery • FR (12/2), 5-8:30pm - An opening celebration for Working Girls Studio and Gallery will be held at 30 Battery Park Ave. Info: www.workinggirlsstudio.com.

Auditions & Call to Artists

Freshly prepared, authentic recipes Visit us online & see our menu: www.IndiaGardenOnline.com

Open 7 Days Amazing Lunch Buffet Full Bar / Import Beer from India 80 S. Tunnel Rd., Asheville, NC

(Overlook Village across from Best Buy)

828-298-5001

Capital infrastructure grants • Through MO (12/12) - Buncombe County Parks, Greenways and Recreation Services seeks applications for its Capital Infrastructure Grants, which directly promote physical activity.

Mail to 59 Woodfin Place

by Dec. 12. Info: jessica. stevermer@buncombecounty.org or 250-4260.

Eco Arts Awards • Through WE (11/30) - The Eco Arts Awards will accept songs, short films, photography, poetry and fine and functional art on the theme of ecology through Nov. 30. $30. Info: www.ecoartsawards.com.

Fountainhead Bookstore Short Story Contest • Through SA (12/10) - Submissions for the Fountainhead Bookstore Short Story Contest, on the theme of modern life in small town North Carolina, will be accepted through Dec. 10. Info: www.fountainheadbookstore.com or 697-1870.

Memoirs Contest • Through WE (11/30) - The Writers’ Workshop will accept unpublished submissions for its annual memoirs contest through Nov. 30. Info:

www.twwoa.org or writersw@gmail.com.

Business & Technology Corporate Wellness Programs (pd.) Affordable.

Uniquely designed to employee needs.

Increase productivity and worker satisfaction.

Reduce time away from work and insurance costs. Pilates, Human Ergonomics, Running and Walking programs.

(828) 225-3786.

FormFitnessFunction. com American Business Women’s Association ABWA brings together business women of diverse occupations to raise funds for local scholarships and enhance the professional and personal lives of its members. Info: www. abwaskyhy.com.

• TH (12/8), 6-8pm - WinterFest will feature networking and a light meal. Held at the Crowne Plaza, 1 Resort Drive. $20. Info: 201-953-3930.

Arts2People Artist Resource Center Offering business management workshops for artists at 39 D S. Market St., downtown Asheville.

Classes, unless otherwise noted, are $35. Info and registration: www. arts2people.org or info@ arts2people.org.

• The Arts2People Artist Resource Center seeks instructors with business management skills.

Classes are geared towards creative professionals. Info: www.ashevillearc.com.

Asheville SCORE Counselors to Small Business Seminars are held at A-B Tech’s Small Business Center, room 2046. Free for veterans. Info: www. ashevillescore.org or 242-0277.

• WE (11/30), 6-9:30pm - A workshop on social media will cover online visibility and branding.

Creative technology & Arts Center Located at Odyssey Community School, 90 Zillicoa St. Info: www. ctacenter.org.

• THURSDAYS through (12/8), 5:30pm “Wordpress Basics and Beyond.” Adults. $10/ first class free.

• THURSDAYS through (12/8), 4pm - Modul8

8 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

and VJ techniques. High school students and adults. $10/first class free.

• SA (12/3), 6pm - “Pulse: A Journey through Light, Rhythm and Movement” will include a “light lab” for kids. $20 per family/$10 per person.

• TUESDAYS through (12/6), 4pm - Digital music production classes will cover Ableton Live software. For high school students and adults. $10/ first class free.

Macintosh Asheville Computer Society (MACS) • 2nd THURSDAYS, 7pm - Meetings held at CityMac, 755 Biltmore Ave., on the corner of Meadow Road. Visitors welcome. Q&A, problem solving, demonstrations and guest speakers. Info: www.citymac.com or 712-7493.

North Carolina State Budget Overview • TU (12/6), 8:3010:30am - An overview of the North Carolina state budget will be presented by the United Way, the N.C. Budget and Tax Center and the N.C. Justice Center. Held in the Haynes building conference room on A-B Tech’s Enka Campus.

Info and registration: atrkatz@unitedwayabc. org or 255-0696.

Classes, Meetings, Events & Lectures Open Stitch groups at Purl’s Yarn Emporium (pd.) On Wall Street downtown: Wednesdays, 10am-12pm; Thursdays, 6-8pm. Bring a knit or crochet project or find something new to cast on. (828) 253-2750. www.purlsyarnemporium.com ACt vs SAt Comparison test • SATURDAYS, 9am & SUNDAYS, 1pm Asheville students are invited to take an “ACT vs SAT Comparison Test” to determine which represents their best match. Held at Chyten Educational Services, 1550 Hendersonville Road, Suite 104, Asheville. Free. Info and reservations: www. chyten-asheville.com or 505-2495.

Asheville tantra School Located at 2 Westwood Place, inside the Appalachia School of

Holistic Herbalism building. $10-15 per hour with sliding scale available for some classes. Info: www.AshevilleTantra. com.

• WEDNESDAYS through (12/21), 7-10pm - “The Art of Intimacy: Really hearing and sharing skillfully.” White level (nonsexual discussion for all relationships).

• THURSDAYS through (12/29), 7-10pm - “The Art of Intimacy.” Pink level (discussion includes sexual intimacy).

• FR (12/2), 7-9pm - Intro to sexual and sensual healing through Tantra and Tantrica skills.

• MONDAYS (12/5) through (12/19), 7-9pm - “Men’s Sexual Energy: Build It, Contain It and Channel It.” Beth israel Synagogue Located at 229 Murdock Ave. An egalitarian house of prayer, study and assembly in the conservative Jewish tradition where all are welcome.

Join us for Shabbat services, Minyans, high holidays and festival services and celebrations.

Info: 252-8431 or www. bethisraelnc.org.

• SU (12/4), 10:30am - Join Sue and Jeremy Lerner for a travelogue, lecture and slide presentation about their unique experiences as Jews visiting Saudi Arabia.

Chorus Rehearsals • TUESDAYS, 7:30pm - Land of the Sky Chorus will hold rehearsals at Francis Asbury UMC, 725 Asbury Road, Candler.

New singers and guests welcome. Info: www. ashevillebarbershop.com or 866-290-7269.

Courthouse tours • WE (12/7), 2pm - Historic courthouse tours will depart from 200 North Grove St., Hendersonville. Free.

Info: 694-5003.

Creative technology & Arts Center Located at Odyssey Community School, 90 Zillicoa St. Info: www. ctacenter.org.

• THURSDAYS through (12/8), 4pm - Screen printing on ceramic tiles for high school students and adults. $10/first class free.

Cribbage group • MONDAYS, 6pm - Meets at Earth Fare Westgate for friendly game playing. All skill

levels welcome. Info: 254-3899.

Free Beginner Massage Class • A beginner massage class will be offered monthly. Free. Info, location and dates: www. vitalitymassage.net or 645-5228.

Henderson County Heritage Museum Located in the Historic Courthouse on Main Street in Hendersonville.

Info: www.hendersoncountymuseum.org or 694-1619.

• Through FR (12/30) - An exhibit of Civil War artifacts will feature military weaponry and uniforms. i-40 Open Access Conference • TU (12/6), 8:30am2pm - A conference to discuss the I-40 Open Access plan will be hosted by the Landof-Sky Rural Planning Organization. Held at the Maggie Valley Club and Resort, 1819 Country Club Drive. $15 includes breakfast and lunch. Info: www.landofskyrpo.org italian Conversation Class • FRIDAYS through (1/20), 10-11am - An Italian conversation class will be offered at Opportunity House, 1411 Asheville Highway. $40.

Info: 692-0575.

Muslim Awareness Project A series of lectures and events at Warren Wilson College to highlight Muslim culture, politics and economics. Info: spirituallife@warren-wilson.edu.

• FR (12/2), 1pm - A field trip to the Islamic Center of Asheville will depart from the Gladfelter building and return at 2:30pm.

• MO (12/5), 5:45pm - “Muslim Economics and the Current World Economic Crisis” will be presented in Mierke dinning room.

• TU (12/6), 5:45pm - “Embracing Hope/ Overcoming Fear” will be presented in Mierke dinning room.

Pearl Harbor Commemorative Ceremony • WE (12/7), 11am - A Pearl Harbor commemorative ceremony will feature a patriotic program and reading by the winner of the Pearl Harbor Day essay contest. Held in the Historic Courthouse on Main

Street. in Hendersonville.

Info: 697-9026.

Public Lectures & Events at UNCA Events are free unless otherwise noted.

• FR (12/2), 11:25am - “The Modern World and Music,” with Melodie Galloway, assistant professor of music. Held in Lipinsky Auditorium. Info: humanities.unca.edu or 251-6808. —- 11:25am - “Global Challenges and Future Prospects,” with William Spellman, professor of history. Held in the Humanities Lecture Hall.

• MO (12/5), 11:25am - “Art of the Classical World,” with Alan Hantz, professor of mass communication. Held in the Humanities Lecture Hall. Info: humanities. unca.edu. —- 11:25am - “Where have we been?

Where are we? Where are we going? The Ebb and Flow of Empires,” with Ann Dunn, lecturer in humanities. Held in Lipinsky Auditorium.

• TU (12/6), 7pm The Arab Spring: Is it Summer (or Winter) Yet and Why Does It Matter?” with James Larocco, director of the Near East South Asia Center for Strategic Studies. $8.

Held in the Reuter Center.

Info: www2.unca.edu/ ncccr or 251-6140.

Puppet Club • 1st TUESDAYS, 7pm - This monthly gathering helps puppet aficionados become puppeteers through informal exploratory workshops. Every meeting has a different activity and focus. All levels and types of puppetry welcome. Held in Montford. Free. Info and location: katievenezolana@hotmail.com.

Summit on Sex Work and Human Rights • FR (12/2), 9am4:30pm - A summit on sex work and human rights will be held at Haywood Street Congregation, 297 Haywood St. Info: Robert@nchrc.net. the Fine Arts League of the Carolinas Located at 362 Depot St., in the River Arts District.

Info: www.fineartsleague. org or 252-5050.

• THURSDAYS, 7-9pm - Open drawing class with live models. $7/$5 students. the Long-Range Winter Forecast • TU (12/6), 6pm - Meteorologist Tom

Ross will discuss the winter forecast for WNC in A-B Tech’s Ferguson Auditorium, Asheville Campus. A Q&A session will immediately follow.

Hosted by A-B Tech’s Institute for Climate Education. Free. Info: http://bit.ly/tjLWyB. Unity Center Events Located at 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Road, Mills River. Info: www. unitync.net, 684-3798 or 891-8700.

• SU (12/4), 2pm - A hands-on floral arranging class. Bring a container and supplies. Donations encouraged.

Veterans for Peace The public is invited to the regular business meeting of the WNC Veterans for Peace Chapter 099. Info: 258-1800 or vfpchapter099wnc.blogspot.com.

• TH (12/1), 6:30pm - Meeting VFP HQ at the Phil Mechanic Studios, 109 Roberts St. • THURSDAYS, noon1pm - The WNC Fiber Folk Group meets at WCU’s Bardo Fine and Performing Arts Center, 1 University Drive, Cullowhee. Info: ddrury@ wcu.edu or 227-2553.

Dance Beginner Swing Dancing Lessons (pd.) 4 week series starts first Tuesday of every month at 7:30pm. $12/week per person. • No partner necessary.

Eleven on Grove, downtown Asheville. Details: www.SwingAsheville. com Capoeira Angola (pd.) An Afro-Brazilian cultural art, combines dance, music, and martial arts. • Adult and kids classes offered, see website for schedule.

Beginners welcome Mondays, Saturdays.

• Location: 257 Short Coxe. http://www. capoeiraasheville.org/ Studio Zahiya (pd.) Monday, 6-7 Yoga • 7:30-9 Bellydance • Tuesday 9-10am Hip Hop Workout • Noon-1pm Groove Dance • 6-7pm Beginner Bellydance, • 7-8pm Intermediate Bellydance • Wednesday 6-7 Pilates, • 7:30-9 Bellydance, • Thursday 9-10am Bellydance, • 67pm Bollywood, • 8-9pm Hip Hop, • Friday 1011am Bhangra Workout.

• $12 for 60 minute classes. 90 1/2 N. Lexington Avenue. www. studiozahiya.com Eleven on grove Located at 11 Grove St. Info: www.elevenongrove.com or 505-1612.

• TUESDAYS, 7pm - Tango lessons. Open dance at 8:30pm.

Hendersonville Ballroom Dance Club Meets in the ballroom of the Elks Lodge, 546 N. Justice St., Hendersonville. $6/5 members. Couples and singles of all ages are welcome. Info: 6928281.

• FRIDAYS, 7:30-10pm - Big band, waltz, tango and Latino dance.

Government & Politics Community Conversations: today’s Nuclear Establishment • 1st SUNDAYS, 79pm - “Community Conversations: Historical and Political Economic Origins of Today’s Nuclear Establishment” will be held at Marshall Arts, 7609 Highway 25/70 in Marshall. Info: www.marshallcommunityarts.com. green Party Meeting • SA (12/3), 10am-noon - An open meeting will be held upstairs in the Fortune Building, 729 Haywood Road in West Asheville. Info: 2254347.

Latino immigration and U.S. Policy • TU (12/6), 7:30pm - Elaine Lacy will discuss Latino immigration and U.S. policy. Held in the Manheimer Auditorium of UNCA’s Reuter Center. $8/Free for students and World Affairs Council members. Info: 242-6380 or gpeery@mhc.edu.

Occupy the Future • SA (12/3), noon - Occupy the Future, a family-friendly afternoon of games, songs, performances and learning opportunities. General assembly at 3pm, followed by a parade and picket in front of the Vance monument. Held at Pritchard Park, 67 Patton Ave. Info: www.occupyasheville.org.

Eco Bill McKibben • WE (11/30), 7pm - Bill McKibben, leader of 350. org and organizer of the

Keystone Pipeline actions in Washington DC, will speak at UNCA’s Lipinsky Auditorium. Free, but limited seating. Info: http://avl.mx/72.

Conservation Conversation • WE (12/7), 6:30-8pm - A conversation about conservation will focus on the Chimney Rock State Park master plan.

Held at Esmeralda Inn, 910 Main St., Chimney Rock. Info: www. friendsofhng.org, wolfeyes20201@bellsouth. net, or 625-8999.

Electric Car test Drive • TH (12/1), 9am-noon - Electric car test drives will be offered by the Land-of-Sky Regional Council at Eaton Corporation Plant, 221 Haywood Road, Arden.

Info and registration: brian@landofsky.org.

Free trees • Through SA (12/10) - Individuals who join the Arbor Day Foundation will receive a free tree as part of the Trees for America campaign. Info: wnelson@arborday.org or 888-448-7337.

N.C. Arboretum Events The Arboretum hosts a variety of educational programs. Unless otherwise noted, all events are free with parking fee ($8/vehicle). No parking fees on 1st Tuesdays.

Located at 100 Frederick Law Olmsted Way. Info: www.ncarboretum.org or 665-2492.

• Through SU (12/11) - The North Carolina Arboretum and MOSAIC Community Lifestyle Realty will offer green home tours. Info: membership@ncarboretum. org.

• Through MO (1/2), 10am-4pm - “Sustainable Shelter” will feature scale models and interactive computer games to investigate how humans can green their homes. $3/$2 students.

• Through MO (1/2) - The Home Green Home exhibit will feature animal shelters, insect hives and nests.

Regional Bicycle Plan • WE (11/30), 10:30am2:30pm - A kick-off event for the regional bicycle plan will be feature speakers, a public input session and a light lunch. Held at Haywood Community College’s High Tech Center, 112 Industrial Park Drive,

Waynesville. Info: www. fbrmpo.org.

My Florida Home for

Your Home in Asheville

Gardening Amaryllis Sale • TH (12/1) through TU (12/20) - An amaryllis sale will take place at Bullington Center, 33 Upper Red Oak Trail, Hendersonville. Open house Dec. 9 and 10.

Info: www.bullingtoncenter.org or 698-6104.

2400 Sqft Executive 3 BR, 2 BA Home, Excellent condition in Stuart, Florida. Pool, Jacuzzi, 2 Car Garage, Lush, Tropical, Private!

Kids Sweet tee Mini-golf • Biltmore Square Mall (pd.) Affordable Family Fun, Free Toddler Play Area, Free Events Weekly, Game Area.

Small beer selection.

Like Us on Facebook, get event updates. www.

SweetTeeMiniGolf.com Celebration Singers • THURSDAYS, 6:207:45pm - The Celebration Singers of Asheville Community Youth Chorus invites children ages 714 to join. Held at First Congregational Church, 20 Oak St. Info: 2305778.

Hands On! This children’s museum is located at 318 North Main St., Hendersonville.

Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am5pm. Admission is $5, with discounts available on certain days. Info: www.handsonwnc.org or 697-8333.

• WE (11/30), 10:30am - Crazy Chemistry for children ages 3 and up.

Letters to Santa • Through TU (12/20) - Children are invited to write letters to Santa and receive a personal reply.

Drop off letters at 1831 Hendersonville Road.

Info: www.postnet.com/ nc141 or 239-2972.

Swim Lessons • MONDAYS through THURSDAYS (12/5) until TH (12/15) - Swim lessons for kids ages 3 and up. Level 1 meets at 4:30pm. Level 2 at 5pm. Held at Waynesville Recreation Center, 550 Vance St. $35/$30 members. Info: recaquatics@ townofwaynesville.org or 456-2030.

Parenting December 3 Jugglers! • Sweet tee Mini golf (pd.) Biltmore Square Mall. Free Toddler Play Area, Free Events Weekly, Game Area. •

772-219-6916 • Email photos to: rbgstuart@bellsouth.net

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Bibliotherapy to Enhance the Lives of Children and teens • MO (12/5), 6:30pm - Learn how books, writing, poetry, drawing and more can help children feel good about themselves, their families and their challenging world.

Appropriate for parents, grandparents, teachers and others who work with children and teens.

Held at Skyland Public Library, 260 Overlook Road. Info: unquilted@ gmail.com.

Events at Pardee Hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall in Hendersonville.

Free, but registration is required unless otherwise noted. Info and registration: www.pardeehospital.org or 692-4600.

• TH (12/1) & TH (12/8), 6:30-9pm - Childbirth classes will focus on birthing options, breathing patterns and comfort.

Free iPad Academy • A free iPad academy will be offered for children under 5. iPads provided for class. Info and directions to downtown location: prekipads@ me.com.

Performance & Film Alexander technique

(pd.) Faculty member ASU Hayes School of Music, 25 years experience, will teach you how to play with satisfaction and ease! Prevent injury and performance anxiety. Affordable.

(828) 225-3786.

FormFitnessFunction. com Song O’ Sky Show Chorus (pd.) TUESDAYS, 6:45pm - Rehearsal at First Congregational United Church of Christ (UCC) 20 Oak Street Asheville 28801.(Enter Fellowship Hall-lower level). Guests welcome. Contact: www. songosky.org Toll Free # 1-866-824-9547.

Black Mountain College Museum + Arts Center The center is located at 56 Broadway and preserves the legacy of the Black Mountain College. Info: bmcmac@ bellsouth.net or www. blackmountaincollege.org or 350-8484.

• SA (12/3), 8pm Variations on the Long Note will feature six musicians performing The Long Note from the John Cage Halberstadt Project.

Held in conjunction with John Cage: A Circle of Influences. $7/$5 members and students.

Blue Ridge Orchestra Info: www.blueridgeorchestra.org or 650-0948.

• WEDNESDAYS, 79:30pm - Open rehearsals for the Blue Ridge Orchestra will be held most Wednesdays at the symphony office in the

Civic Center. Free. Call for confirmation.

Bluegrass and Country Concert • 1st SATURDAYS, 610:30pm - The Lions Club will host a bluegrass and country music night with a raffle and cake walk. Free, but donations encouraged.

Held at 188 Erwin Hills Road.

Crystal Music CoOP • THURSDAYS, 7pm - “Listen to Each Other While we Play” drum meditation will be offered at 41 Carolina Lane.

Bring your drum or borrow one of ours. By donation. Info: 310-7459150.

Dinner with Dickens • SA (12/3), 6:30pm Enjoy a five course meal with Charles Dickens and The Montford Park Players at the Asheville Masonic Temple, 80 Broadway St. $25. Info and tickets: www.tinyurl. com/DinnerwithDickens or 252-3924.

Dobra tea Located at 78 N. Lexington Ave. Info: www.dobrateanc.com.

• WE (12/7), 8pm - The Tabla and Sitar Experience (Indian music).

• TH (12/8), 8pm - Said Osio (conceptual music and poetry).

Doug Elliott • SU (12/4), 3pm - Doug Elliott (songs and storytelling) will perform at the Unitarian

Universalist Fellowship of Hendersonville, 2021 Kanuga Road. Info: 6933157.

Hendersonville Bluegrass Jam • FRIDAYS, 7-9pm - A bluegrass jam will be held at the historic courthouse in downtown Hendersonville. Info: 233-3216.

Ken Medema Concert • SU (12/4), 7pm - Join First Baptist Church of Asheville, 5 Oak St., for a special night of music to celebrate the Advent season. Info: www.fbca.net.

Madrigal Dinner • FR (12/2) & SA (12/3), 6:30pm - A madrigal dinner will feature entertainment, costumes and food reminiscent of 16th-century England.

Held at WCU’s A.K. Hinds University Center. $35/$20 students. Info: www.wcu.edu or 2277206.

Mars Hill College Events Info: www.mhc.edu.

• Through SU (12/4) - The Rainmaker. $8/$5 students. Info: 689-1239.

Neurotypical • WE (11/30), 6:30pm - Neurotypical, a film about autism, will be screened at A-B Tech’s Ferguson Auditorium on the Asheville Campus. $5. Info: www.abtech. edu or 254-1921.

Perspectives: Festival of Short Plays • FR (12/2) through MO (12/5) - Perspectives: Festival of Short Plays

Believe it or not the Holidays are right around the corner, Get your appointment today.

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W A T E R L I LY H O L I D AY S P E C I A L All hair and nail services booked between Nov. 15th and Dec. 30th will receive 50% Off all facial services booked for the same day Using all organic products in a relaxed environment Walk ins welcome - Call now to make your appointment

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828.505.3288 • 7 beaverdam road, asheville, nc 0 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

with Student Directors will be performed throughout the weekend at various locations.

Free. See website for times. Info: drama.unca. edu/theatre-unca or 2516610.

Prime time in the Camps • TH (12/1), 5:15pm Prime Time in the Camps focuses on Bosnian refugees living in the ruins of army barracks in Slovenia. Screened at WCU’s Bardo Arts Center. Info: www.wcu. edu/museum or 2272553.

St. Matthias Musical Performances Located at 1 Dundee St. (off South Charlotte).

Info: 285-0033.

• SU (12/4), 3pm - Musike Antiqua (Christmas carols). the Altamont Located at 18 Church St. Info: www.myaltamont. com or 274-8070.

• SA (12/3), 8pm Stand-up comedy with Sid Davis. the Hop Ice cream, concerts and community events. 640 Merrimon Ave., Suite 103, unless otherwise noted. Search “The Hop Cafe” on Facebook or 254-2224.

• TH (12/1), 6-7pm - Canyon Creek (bluegrass).

• FR (12/2), 6:307:30pm - Nikki Talley (alt-country) will perform at the Hop West, 721 Haywood Road.

• TU (12/6), 6-7pm - Curtain Call Collective will perform Beauty and The Beast, Jr. the ister • TH (12/8), 5:15pm The Ister, a film based on the work of philosopher Martin Heidegger, will be screened at WCU’s Bardo Arts Center. Info: www. wcu.edu/museum. the Laramie Project • THURSDAY through SATURDAY until (12/10), 7:30pm - The Laramie Project will be performed by Different Strokes! Performing Arts Collective at the BeBe Theatre, 20 Commerce St. $15/$12 in advance/$10 students.

Info: www.differentstrokesavl.com. the Magnetic Field A cafe, bar and performance house located at 372 Depot St. in the River Arts District. Info: www.themagneticfield. com or 257-4003.

• TU (12/6), 8pm Jarrod Harris (stand-up comedy). $5. the New Appalachia • TH (12/8), 7:30pm - “The New Appalachia: No more moonshine, Li’l Abners and Daisy Maes” will feature poets, musicians and historians.

Held at WCU’s Mountain Heritage Center. Free.

Info: 227-7129.

Seniors Alexander technique Courses for Seniors (pd.) Improve equilibrium, lightness and flexibility. Reduce and prevent joint pain. Increase confidence. Personalized private instruction delivers long term benefits. (828) 225-3786.

FormFitnessFunction. com RSVP info Session • TH (12/8), 9:30-11am - Want to volunteer but don’t know where to start? Join RSVP, the volunteer center for older adults, for an information session featuring a guest speaker from Waste Reduction Partner. Held at the NCCCR, located in UNCA’s Reutuer Center.

Info and registration: patti@landofsky.org or 251-6622.

Spirituality Asheville Center for transcendental Meditation (“tM”) (pd.) Discover why TM is the world’s most effective and scientifically validated meditation technique. Clinically proven to boost brain function and reduce anxiety, depression, addiction, and ADHD. Allows you to effortlessly transcend the busy, agitated mind to experience inner peace and unbounded awareness. • Free Introductory Class: Thursday, 6:30pm, 165 E. Chestnut • Topics: How meditation techniques differ • Meditation and brain research • What is enlightenment?

(828) 254-4350. www.

MeditationAsheville.org Astro-Counseling (pd.) Licensed counselor and accredited professional astrologer uses your chart when counseling for additional insight into yourself, your relationships and life directions. Readings also available. Christy

Gunther, MA, LPC. (828) 258-3229.

Compassionate Communication (pd.) Learn ways to create understanding and clarity in your relationships, work, and community by practicing compassionate communication. Great for couples! Group uses model developed by Marshall Rosenberg in his book “Non-violent Communication, A Language of Life.” Free.

Info: 299-0538 or www. ashevilleccc.com. • 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 5:006:15—Practice group for newcomers and experienced practitioners.

Events to Uplift Humanity With Bill Bowers (pd.) Bill Bowers Guidance: Connect with Spirit in a private or group session. • Contact Bill: (828) 216-9039 or visionsjtf@hotmail.com • www.billbowersguidance.com Mindfulness Meditation Class (pd.)Explore the miracle of healing into life through deepened stillness and presence. With consciousness teacher and columnist Bill Walz.

Info: 258-3241 or www. billwalz.com.

• MONDAYS, 7-8pm - Meditation class with lesson and discussion of contemporary Zen living. Held at the Asheville Friends Meeting House, 227 Edgewood Road (off Merrimon Avenue).

Donations encouraged.

Open Heart Meditation (pd.) Learn easy, wonderful practices that connect you to the joy within your own heart.

• Free. 7pm, Tuesdays.

5 Covington St., W. Asheville. 296-0017 or 645-5950. http://www. heartsanctuary.org Advanced Meditation Session • 1st SUNDAYS, 6:30pm - Advanced-to-intermediate meditators, or individuals who can sit quietly and pleasantly for an hour, are invited to meditate at the Asheville School of Massage and Yoga, 77 Walnut St. Info: 423-6636.

Blue Holiday Service • SU (12/4), 3pm - A “blue holiday” interfaith service invites anyone experiencing stress or grief during the holidays.

Held at YWCA Asheville, 185 S. French Broad Ave. Info: mountainfaithinitia-

tives@yahoo.com or 707-2937.

Cloud Cottage Sangha Location: 219 Old Toll Circle in Black Mountain.

Info: www.cloudcottage. org or 669-0920.

• WEDNESDAYS, 67:30pm & SUNDAYS, 8-10am - Weekly meetings will feature seated and walking meditation, Dharma talks and chanting.

• WE (11/30), 6pm - A Dharma talk on “The Presence of Love.”

Create a Life in Harmony with Divine Laws • SU (12/4), 11am-noon - “Phrase your wishes on this order: ‘If I am ready, let me pass from my present situations into ones more in keeping with a higher state of consciousness.’ Then hold your wishes lightly in mind. And let whatever will be, be.” Held at Eckankar Center of Asheville, 797 Haywood Road. Info: www.eckankar-nc.org or 254-6775.

Divine Energy Share • 1st WEDNESDAYS, 6-8pm - All are welcome to participate in this Healing Circle, including reiki practitioners, other energy workers and nonpractitioners curious to tap their healing potential. By donation. Meets at 60 Caledonia Road #B (the carriage house behind the Kenilworth Inn Apartments). Info: 7072983.

Dream interpretation Workshop • SA (12/3), 12:301:30pm - An introductory dream interpretation workshop will be held at the Jewish Community Center, 236 Charlotte St. Bring a dream or dream fragment to develop during the workshop. Info: 253-0701.

Events at First Congregational United Church of Christ Located at Fifth Avenue W. and White Pine Drive, Hendersonville. Info: www.fcchendersonville. org.

• SU (12/4), 9:15pm - Adult forum: “Marriage” with Rev. Barbara Rathbun.

Events at Montford Books & More Used bookstore hosting workshops and authors at 31 Montford Ave. Info: www.montfordbooks.com or 285-8805.

• SUNDAYS, 7pm-8:30 - Join Buddhist teacher Hannah Kim for an

exploration of the book Modern Buddhism by Gehse Kelsang Gyatso.

Includes meditation, talk and discussion. $8/$5 seniors and students.

Info: meditationinasheville@gmail.com. i Ching Support and Study group • THURSDAYS, 68:30pm - “I Ching Support and Study Group,” a study of Taoism and I Ching practice. Will meet at an area cafe, to be determined.

Info: patrickgfrank@ gmail.com.

Meditation and Satsang with Madhyanandi • MONDAYS through THURSDAYS, 6am-9pm - Meditate and practice with an awakened yogini.

Sessions available by appointment. All fees by donation; no one will be turned away. Info: www. thepeoplesashram.org or madhyanandi@gmail. com.

Meditation in the Kriya Yoga tradition • SUNDAYS, 9 & 11am & THURSDAYS, 6:30pm - The Center for Spiritual Awareness will host meditation in the Kriya yoga tradition for spiritual and personal growth.

By donation. Info and location: www.csa-asheville.org or 490-1136.

Meditation Workshop • SU (12/4), 9am-noon - A three-hour meditation workshop will be held at the Center for Spiritual Awareness. By donation.

Info and location: www. csa-asheville.org or 4901136.

Sound Healing Circle • MONDAYS, 7-8:30pm “Come and receive if you are feeling lowly and in need of support or come and share healing light if your bliss cup runneth over.” Bring bowls, bells, rattles, didge, etc. Held at 41 Carolina Lane. By donation. Info: 310-7459150.

Unity Center Events Located at 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Road, Mills River. Info: www. unitync.net, 684-3798 or 891-8700.

• WE (11/30), 7pm - A labyrinth walk will promote healing, mediation and prayer.

• SA (12/24), 7:30pm - A Christmas Eve candle lighting service will celebrate the Christmas story with music. Donations encouraged.

• SU (12/25), 11am - A Christmas day celebration. Childcare provided.

• WE (12/7), 7-9pm - “Quantum Touch: The Power to Heal,” an introduction to the healing technique quantum touch. Info: 891-3255.

Unity Church of Asheville Located at 130 Shelburne Road. Info: www.unityofasheville.com or 2525010.

• TUESDAYS, 2-4pm - A Search For God A.R.E. Study Group.

• SUNDAYS, 11am - Spiritual celebration service —- 12:30-2pm - A Course in Miracles study group.

Wiccan Open Court • FRIDAYS, 7-9pm Open Court meets weekly in Marshall for potluck, Wiccan principals and elements, meditations, hand crafting and occasional ceremonies.

Provided by Highland Wild Coven. Email to meet about attendance: shinemoon76@yahoo. com.

Windhorse Zen Community Newcomers call ahead for orientation. Located at 580 Panther Branch Road, near Weaverville.

Info: www.windhorsezen. org or 645-8001.

• SUNDAYS, 9:30am Meditation, chanting and Dharma talk, followed by a vegetarian potluck lunch.

Yoga of Awakening • MONDAYS, 7-9pm - “Awaken to profound peace. Practice technologies to free the body and mind of stress and tension. Begin your adventure of awakening.”

Fees by donation; no one will be turned away. Info and directions: www. thepeoplesashram.org or madhyanandi@gmail. com.

Young Adult Friends Worship group • SATURDAYS, 46:30pm - This small Quaker group for young adults meets upstairs at Asheville Friends Meeting House, 227 Edgewood Road. Singing and silence will be followed by a potluck. For Quakers, quasi-Quakers and anyone who is interested. Info: biercewilson@gmail.com.

Zen Center of Asheville • WEDNESDAYS, 78:30pm - Zazen and dharma talks will be offered at 12 Van Ruck

freewillastrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

128 acres. I suspect you will feel right at home in places like Lambir Hills in the coming week, Leo. Your own creative urges will be running hotter than usual, and are most likely to thrive in contexts that are themselves teeming with lush fertility and rich diversity. Please surround yourself with inspirational influences, thereby giving yourself the best possible chance to express yourself with vivid imagination.

This would be an excellent week to head down to Pucón, Chile and hire a daredevil to fly you in a helicopter into the caldera of the active Villarrica volcano, whereupon you would bungee jump out of the ‘copter down to within 700 feet of the molten lava. If that’s too extreme or expensive for your tastes, I urge you to come up a milder adventure that will still bring you a close encounter with primal heat and light — and maybe even some divine fire.

“People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home,” wrote philosopher Dagobert D. Runes. Your As a mouse looks for food or shelter, it is assignment, Virgo, should you choose to accept flexible enough to fit through a hole as small it, is to refute that assertion. In other words, I’m as a quarter of an inch. You would really ben- inviting you to travel to all of your usual haunts efit from having a talent like that right now, and treat everything that happens there with the Taurus. Of course, even if you are as slippery attitude of a first-time visitor. Just assume that and pliable as you’ll need to be, you will also the familiar people and places in your life have have to be on high alert for the inviting pos- stimulating gifts to give and lessons to impart. sibilities, some of which may be brief or subtle. Remember, though, they can’t do that to the fullFor example, let’s say you spy an interest- est unless you expect them to. ing-looking person with whom you’d love to chat. The window of opportunity may be open for less than 10 seconds. Seize that moment! The human brain is composed of 30 percent Refuse to get hung up in shyness. Don’t con- protein and 70 percent fat. So it wouldn’t be vince yourself that another chance will come incorrect to refer to you as a fathead. In order to along later. nourish your brain cells, you’ve got to eat foods

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

One of my Gemini acquaintances, Tara, has been playing a slow-moving game of tag with three friends since they were all in second grade together. They’re 27 years old now, and still live in the same city. Currently, Tara is “It,” and has been so for quite some time. But she confided in me that she plans to make a move this week. She says she’ll sneak up on one of the other players during his lunch break at work, tag him, and run away before he can tag her back. I told her she’s likely to meet with success, since this is an excellent time for you Geminis to gain an advantage in pretty much any kind of game you’re playing.

CANCER (June 21-July 22) “Far more crucial than what we know or do not know is what we do not want to know,” wrote philosopher Eric Hoffer. This is a good idea for you to contemplate right now. I realize it may be a challenge for you to figure out what you would rather not know and are afraid to know and might even be allergic to knowing. Still, I hope you’ll make the effort. Maybe you could enlist a smart ally who’d be skillful in helping you uncover the taboo truth. And maybe you could formulate an intention to be as objective as you’ve ever been.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) “Dear Mr. Brezsny: My name is Sonny McGee and I own a website that caters to people who are addicted to playing poker. I’m a big fan of your horoscopes, and I’m wondering if you would like to advertise your work to our audience. Gamblers love astrology! Get in touch.

- Sagittarian Wheeler Dealer.” Dear Wheeler Dealer: Thanks for your interest, but I’ll pass.

I don’t like to encourage anyone to focus their gambling urges on trivial matters like card games, sports events, and lotteries. I prefer they direct that mojo to high-minded stuff like daring themselves to excel, pursuing exciting and idealistic adventures, and doing brave things to help save the world. By the way, it’s prime time for you Sagittarians to ratchet up your commitment to those kinds of gambles.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) I hope you’re not so perversely attached to your demons that you’re inclined to keep providing them with a comfortable home. Why? Because the coming weeks will be an excellent time for you to permanently banish them from the premises. Yes, I know it may seem lonely at first without their nagging, disruptive voices chattering away in your head. But I really do encourage you to bid them adieu. By the way, as you plan your exorcism, you might want to include a humorous touch or two. They’re allergic to satire and mockery, you know.

that provide two essential fatty acids your body doesn’t manufacture: omega-3 ALA and omega-6 LA. Since you’re now in a “brain-building” phase of your astrological cycle, I urge you to get more than your minimum requirements of these basics.

If I may be permitted to resurrect a now-out-offashion slang term, I suggest that you also expose The Beauvais Cathedral in northern France has yourself to a lot of extraordinarily phat sources of been called “the most daring achievement of Gothic architecture.” Its soaring facades, carved intellectual stimulation. wooden doors, stained glass windows, and astronomical clock demonstrate high artistry.

The mawashi is the loincloth that Japanese sumo There’s a problem with the place, however — it wrestlers wear while competing. It’s rare for the has never been completed. Work began in the garment to come off, even in the heat of a match, year 1225, and experts are still talking about but it did happen once in 2000, when a wrestler how to solve certain ongoing difficulties with named Asanokiri suddenly found himself stand- its construction. I don’t know when this happy ing naked during his bout with Chiyohakuho. ending will occur, Aquarius, but I do expect In conformity with sumo’s rules, Asanokiri was that in 2012 you will be able to put the finishing immediately disqualified. I don’t think you’re touches on your own personal version of the at risk for being rendered literally unclothed in Beauvais Cathedral. And now would be a good the heat of a showdown or a plot twist, Scorpio. time to formulate definite plans to do so.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

But I do advise you to take extra precautions to prevent a metaphorical version of that occurrence. Get your act very together, and keep it In my prayers, I’ve been negotiating with the Goddess to grant you the power to change very together. the course of rivers, at least in a metaphorical way. I’ve also beseeched her to show you how to overthrow the Puppet Master and convert overwrought hawks into savvy doves. The Goddess seems to be seriously considering these appeals, and has even hinted she might Imagine what your life would be like if you licked your worst fear. Describe this offer you instructions on how to shape a new new world to me. Go to RealAstrology.

Adam out of one of Eve’s ribs, mythically Biologists say there are 680 species of trees and com and click on “Email Rob.” speaking. In return, she does have one request: shrubs in the U.S. and Canada. By comparithat you do what you can to make sure the sun son, Lambir Hills National Park on the island © Copyright 2011 Rob Brezsny rises on schedule for the next 10 days. of Borneo is the home of 1,175 species on its

homework

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011

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The Altamont Theatre presents...

Stand-Up Comic Sid Davis

Saturday, Dec. 3 at 8:00pm - Tickets $12.00

Shakespeare Sings!

Scott Joiner, tenor with Daniel Weister, piano. Music by Verdi, Gounod, Tchaikovsky, Purcell, Mendelssohn, Bernstein and more!

Thursday, Dec. 1 at 7:30 pm • Sunday, Dec. 4 at 4 pm Tuesday, Dec. 6 at 7:30 pm

Stand-Up Comic Seaton Smith

Friday, Dec. 16 & 17 at 8:00pm - Tickets $12.00

The Trishas

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Court. Enter at back deck. Info: www.zcasheville.org or 398-4212.

Spoken & Written Word Rabbit and Friends Mic Night at BoBo gallery (pd.) Tuesday, December 6, 9pm. Wildly-varying themed night featuring only original local artistic acts. Opening night’s theme is Spoken Word/ Poetry. Bring your voice.

Hosted by J Rabbit. • Early sign up info: rabbitandfriends@gmail.com Attention WNC Mystery Writers • TU (12/8), 6-9pm - The WNC Mysterians Critique Group will meet at Atlanta Bread Company, 633 Merrimon Ave # A. For serious mystery/suspense/thriller writers. Info: www. wncmysterians.org or 712-5570.

Bil Lepp • SU (12/4), 4pm - Bil Lepp, West Virginia Liar’s Contest champion, will share “hilarious tales and delightful insights into everyday life.” Held at The Madison County Arts Center, 90 S. Main St., Marshall. $15. Info: www.madisoncountyarts. com or 649-1301.

Buncombe County Public Libraries LIBRARY ABBREVIATIONS - Each Library event is marked by the following location abbreviations: n EA = East Asheville Library (902 Tunnel Road, 250-4738) n EC = Enka-Candler Library (1404 Sandhill Road, 250-4758) n SS = Skyland/South Buncombe Library (260 Overlook Road, 2506488) n SW = Swannanoa Library (101 West Charleston Street, 2506486) n WV = Weaverville Library (41 N. Main Street, 250-6482) n Library storyline: 250KIDS. • SA (12/3), 11am - Winter fire safety class. EA —- 10am-4pm - Skyland Friends of the Library book sale. SS —- 10am-3pm - Box/bag used book sale. WV —- 10am-4pm - South Buncombe Library book sale. Cash or check only. SS • TU (12/6), 7pm - Book club: Firefly Lane by

Kristin Hanna. EC. —- 68pm - Knit-n-Chain. SS —- 7pm - Book club: Assorted short stories.

WV • WE (12/7), 3pm - Book club: The Lord of Misrule

by Jaimy Gordon. WV —- 5-7pm - Knitting group. SW Events at Malaprop’s The bookstore and cafe at 55 Haywood St. hosts visiting authors for talks and book signings. Info: www.malaprops.com or 254-6734.

• FR (12/2), 4:30-6pm Freelance Friday, a group for freelancers and those considering self-employment.

• SA (12/3), 7pm - Kathleen Flinn will present her new book The Kitchen Counter Cooking School: How a Few Simple Lessons Transformed Nine Culinary Novices into Fearless Home Cooks.

• MO (12/5), 7pm - Bridging Differences Book Club: The Sunflower: On the Possibilities and Limits of Forgiveness by Simon Wiesenthal.

• WE (12/7), 5:30pm Book club recommendations and wine reception with Penguin sales representative Dave Kliegman.

—- 7pm - Hillary Jordan will read from her new book When She Woke.

—- 8pm - Book club: Mudbound by Hillary Jordan. george and Elizabeth Ellison • FR (12/2), 6-8pm - George and Elizabeth Ellison will read from their book High Vistas: An Anthology of Nature Writing from Western North Carolina and the Great Smoky Mountains, Vol. II. at The Captain’s Bookshelf, 31 Page Ave. Info: 253-6631.

Mountain Writers Meeting • 2nd TUESDAYS, 1pm - Mountain Writers will meet at Blue Ridge Books, 152 S. Main St. Info: www.mountainwritersnc.com or 235-2003. the Magnetic Field A cafe, bar and performance house located at 372 Depot St. in the River Arts District. Info: www.themagneticfield. com or 257-4003.

• 1st and 3rd MONDAYS, 7:30-10pm - The Synergy Story Slam is an opportunity to share stories, laugh, learn and build a stronger commu-

nity. Registration begins at 7pm.

Writers guild of WNC • 2nd THURSDAYS, 1:30-3:30pm - The Writers Guild of WNC will meet at the Fletcher Public Library, 120 Library Road, Hendersonville. Info: WritersGuildWNC@gmail. com or 296-9983.

Sports Cyclists (pd.) Ride lightly. Reduce friction. Eliminate excess tension and pressure in neck, shoulders, back, hips. Get faster.

Alexander Technique teaches the difference eliminating unnecessary effort can make.

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FormFitnessFunction. com Hot Chocolate 10K training Program! (pd.) 7 weeks.

Personalized coached workouts every Wednesday at 6pm and Saturday at 9am. All levels. Carrier Park and UNC-A. $70.

(828) 225-3786.

FormFitnessFunction. com transform Your Form (pd.) Run with a lightness and ease you’ve never known!

Alexander Technique will turn your arms into wings! Thursdays, 6:30pm. $100 for 6 sessions. Ongoing.

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FormFitnessFunction. com Winter group Runs (pd.) Experienced coach leads training runs throughout the winter. Stay in shape all winter long! Weaver Park and other locations. $65 per 6 weeks.

Sundays, 9:30am.

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FormFitnessFunction.com Cardio Dance Fusion • MONDAYS, WEDNESDAYS & FRIDAYS, 6:30-7:30pm - A Cardio Dance Fusion class will be offered at the Waynesville Recreation Center, 550 Vance St. No classes during the holidays. $7/free for members.

Info: recprograms@ townofwaynesville.org or 456-2030. gentle Yoga • FRIDAYS through (12/9), 9-10am - Explore the subtleties of a yoga practice with focus on

stretch, breath and balance in this six-week series at Happy Body, 1378 Hendersonville Road. $10. Info: www. ashevillehappybody.com or 277-5741.

Jus’ Running Weekly coach-led runs.

Meet at 523 Merrimon Ave., unless otherwise noted. Info: www.jusrunning.com.

• MONDAYS, 6pm - Fivemile group run, 10-11 minutes per mile.

•TUESDAYS, 6:30pm Run from the store to the UNCA track for a maggot track workout. There will also be a post-workout get together at a local restaurant.

•WEDNESDAYS, 6:30pm - Eight-mile group run.

•THURSDAYS, 6pm - 8-mile run from Jus’ Running store.

Pickleball • MONDAYS, WEDNESDAYS & FRIDAYS, 9-11am Pickleball is like playing ping pong on a tennis court. Groups meet weekly at Stephens-Lee Recreation Center, 30 G.W. Carver St. For all ages/levels. $1 per session. Info: stephenslee@ ashevillenc.gov or 3502058.

Spin Class • TUESDAYS and THURSDAYS, 5:306:30pm - A spin class will be offered at Waynesville Recreation Center, 550 Vance St. Daily admission charge/ free for members. Info: recaquatics@townofwaynesville.org or 4562030.

Step Aerobics Class • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 5:306:30pm - Enhance cardio, strength and flexibility at this step aerobics, weights and stretch class. Meets at Stephens-Lee Recreation Center, 30 G.W. Carver St. Open to all levels.

Free. Info: stephenslee@ ashevillenc.gov or 3502058.

calEndaR dEadlInE The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m.

WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication.

Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

Do you have what it takes to get the shot?

Mountain Xpress is looking for a

STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER The ideal candidate will thrive in a collegial but fast-paced environment and have an eye for catching the right shot — for breaking news, arts and entertainment, the local food beat, special publications, events and advertising.

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Email cover letter, resume, and portfolio in PDF format to photographer@mountainx.com.

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Mountain Xpress is an equal opportunity employer.

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011

NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 5

consciousparty

fun fundraisers

What: A dodgeball tournament to support the I Have a Dream Foundation of Asheville.

Where: UNCA’s Campus Recreation Center, 1 University Heights, Asheville.

When: Saturday, Dec. 3 at 11 a.m. Suggested donation of $25 per team of five. (ihadasheville.org, 901-573-3235 or http://avl.mx/78 to sign up.)

Why: Dodgeball may bring back memories of red rubber balls smacking the faces of innocent school children, but now it’s a creative way to raise money. The I Have a Dream Foundation of Asheville, a local chapter of the national nonprofit that works to enrich the education of low-income students, is hosting a nonviolent dodgeball tournament for students and adults.

Currently, 28 low-income students from local middle and elementary schools participate in the I Have a Dream Foundation of Asheville’s programs, which includes after-school homework help, team-building games and cooking lessons. Its building in Pisgah View Apartments serves as a hub for students in need of a safe, encouraging place to learn and grow after school. IHAD also encourages UNCA students to mentor low-income children. This is a chance for college students to demonstrate the value of higher education while providing a valuable educational experience for kids.

Photo by Elizabeth Ruf

The dodgeball tournament is more than just a fundraiser. It’s also a chance for I Have a Dream Foundation students to experience an enjoyable afternoon on a college campus. Each team will be paired with an IHAD student, also known as a “dreamer.” Together with UNCA students and members of the community, each “dreamer” will join a team of friendly dodgeball players who are committed to enriching education and having a good time.

benefitscalendar calEndaR FoR novEmbER 30 - dEcEmbER 8, 2011 Chanukah Judaica/gift Shop • Congregation Beth israel Asheville (pd.) Expands it’s Judaica/Gift Shop from November 21 through Chanukah (December 28) by occupying a Micro Cottage generously donated by Compact Cottages Company, which will be located outside the Synagogue. Choose from a wide selection of traditional Judaica items and Chanukah gifts for the entire family. • Visit us Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays, 11am-3pm and Sundays 9:30am-1:30pm. 229 Murdock Avenue. (704) 773-3901. mandlnewman@yahoo.com AiDS Memorial Quilt • Through SA (12/3) - The AIDS Memorial Quilt, “A Tapestry of Lives, Living with 30 Years of HIV/AIDS,” will be hosted by The Western North Carolina AIDS Project at Pack Place, 2 South Pack Square. Info: www.wncap.org.

• TH (12/1), 7-9pm - A candlelight memorial vigil will be held to honor World AIDS Day. American Advertising Federation Asheville www.aafasheville.org.

• TU (12/6), 5:30-7:30pm - A holiday party will benefit Wild South. Held at Vinceno’s, 10 N. Market St. Free, but donations encouraged.

Anniversary and Charity Fundraiser • FR (12/2), 6-8:30pm - Appalachian Vitner anniversary party and fundraiser for Mission Childrens

Hospital. Held at Appalachian Vitner, 2-B Huntsman Place. $5. Info: www.appalachianvintner.com.

Asheville Affiliates Fundraisers This group of young professionals holds fundraisers for nonprofits in Buncombe County with food, beer, wine and raffles. $25/$30 at the door. Info: www. affiliatesofasheville.com.

• TH (12/8), 5:30-8:30pm - “Ashvegas Saloon” will benefit the Asheville Area Arts Council. Held at Asheville Music Hall, 31 Patton Ave. Association of Administrative Professionals Fundraiser • TH (12/1), 5-9pm - The Land of the Sky chapter of International Association of Administrative Professionals will host a fundraiser at Acropolis Pizza, 140 Airport Road, #G, Arden. Tell cashier that you are participating in the fundraiser. Info: www.iaap-landofthesky.org.

Beauty through Cancer • Through WE (11/30) - Print4Food, an environmentally conscious print company, will donate $5 of its orders to Beauty Through Cancer. Info: www. print4food.com.

Christmas tree Sale for Charity • Through SA (12/24) - The Artisan Gourmet Market will host a Christmas tree sale to benefit Swannanoa Valley Christian Ministries, Camp Lakey Gap, Swannanoa Valley Museum and others. Held at 2 East Market St., Black Mountain.

Mon.-Thurs., 3-7pm. Fri.-Sat., noon-7pm. Sun., 10am-2pm. Info: 357-5500.

6 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Holiday Open House and Benefit • SU (12/4), 2:30-5pm - One Center Yoga, 120 Coxe Ave., Suite 3A, will present an open house and benefit event for Meals on Wheels. Bring toothbrushes, gloves, hats, playing cards or cotton hankerchiefs. Info: www.onecenteryoga.com.

Hometown Holiday Jam • TH (12/8), 8pm - Local musicians, including Mike Barnes, Sons of Ralph, The Nova Echo, Marc Keller and Rory Kelly’s Triple Threat, will perform to benefit Mission Children’s Hospital and MANNA FoodBank. Held at the Orange Peel, 101 Biltmore Ave. $10, plus one can of non-perishable food. Info: theorangepeel.net or 225-5851.

Hope in a Hopeless World • TH (12/1), 7:30-9:30pm - Hope in a Hopeless World: A musical benefit for The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, featuring musicians Phil Roy and Rebecca White. Held at the MartinLipscomb Performing Arts Center, 507 Chestnut St., Highlands. $20. $50 VIP includes a meet and greet with the artist, a cocktail and dessert at the Hummingbird of Old Edwards Inn. Info: http://on.fb. me/vuKXgD or 526-9047. i Have a Dream Foundation • SA (12/3), 11am - A dodgeball tournament will benefit the I Have a Dream Foundation. Held at UNCA’s Rec Center. $25 for team of 5. Info: www. surveymonkey.com/s/M93Y5MD or leshapir@ unca.edu.

Jammin’ for Hank

• SA (12/3), 6:30-9:30pm - “Jammin’ for Hank,” a musical dance benefit for Hank Lueck, a faithsupported musician and recording artist battling Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, will be held at Grace Church, 495 Cardinal Road, Mills River, near the Asheville Airport. The evening will include performances by Hank’s friends followed by dance music

by The Business. Info: lcarvell@helpsmission.org.

Make-A-Wish Foundation • TH (12/1), 6pm - A concert, featuring Blackjack, The Sharkadelics and others, will benefit the MakeA-Wish Foundation. Held at the Orange Peel, 101 Biltmore Ave. $10. Info: www.theorangepeel.net or 877-677-WISH. MANNA Food Drive • Through SA (12/10), 11am-5pm - Fresh Produce Sporswear, 18 Lodge St. in Biltmore Village, will host a food drive to benefit MANNA FoodBank.

Donors receive $1 store credit for each food item donated (up to $20).

Midnight Meditations to Benefit the Autism Society • SU (12/4), 7pm - The Echo Cooperative will host “Unearthing Joy in the Dark Night of the Soul: Midnight Meditations,” featuring 10 musicians performing Christmas mass music to benefit the Autism Society of N.C. Donations encouraged.

Held at Jubilee! Community, 46 Wall St. Info: www. echocooperative.org.

Race For Change

• SA (12/3), 1pm - Race For Change 5/10K will benefit The Salvation Army. Departs from the Henderson County Courthouse, 200 North Grove St. $25/$20 before Dec. 1. Info: www.salvationarmyhendersonville.org or 693-4181.

Salvation Army Race For Change • SA (12/3), 1pm - Race For Change 5K/10K will benefit The Salvation Army. Departs from the Henderson County Courthouse, 200 North Grove St., Hendersonville. Entry fee: $25 after Dec. 1. Free for spectators. Info: www.salvationarmyhendersonville.org or 693-4181.

Women At Risk Benefit Concert • TH (12/1), 7-10pm - A benefit concert for the Women At Risk program will be held at Asheville Music Hall, 31 Patton Ave., featuring music by Dehila Low and Every Mother’s Dream. All proceeds benefit Women at Risk. $10. Info: www. ashevillemusichall.com or www.wccj.org/womenatrisk.html.

moRE bEnEFIts EvEnts onlInE

Check out the Benefits Calendar online at www. mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after December 8.

calEndaR dEadlInE

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m.

WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication.

Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

newsoftheweird Lead story

Ironies

At a banquet in November, the News Limited (Rupert Murdoch’s empire) awarded Simon Eroro of the Papua New Guinea Post-Courier its “Scoop of the Year” honor for reporting on militant tribal fighters of the Free West Papua movement — a scoop he earned by agreeing to undergo a ritual circumcision, with bamboo sticks, to prove his sincerity. (Some of the rebels still wear penis gourds, whose size varies with the wearer’s status.)

• Unclear on the Concept: (1) Texas physician Akili Graham, 34, who gives paid motivational speeches on how to deal with stress, was arrested in October in Houston and charged as the frontman for four “pain clinics” allegedly dispensing prescription drugs illegally. (2) Christopher Jarvis, 49, a chief child-abuse investigator for the Catholic Church in Britain, was sentenced in October after pleading guilty to having more than 4,000 childsex images on his computer. Jarvis had been hired in 2002 to keep pedophiles from gaining access to church groups.

• Sixty-year-old violinist Martin Stoner, who lost his job after 25 years and is suing the New York City Ballet for age discrimination, petitioned federal Judge Robert Patterson to disqualify himself from the case because he’s too old (88) and, according to Stoner, has vision and hearing problems.

• Why People love Washington: U.S. Rep. Tom Graves of Georgia told The Atlanta JournalConstitution in August that he and a partner had “settled” the lawsuit brought by the Bartow County Bank for failing to repay a $2.2 million loan they’d taken out in 2007. Graves has been a staunch advocate of governmental fiscal austerity and voted against raising the federal debt-ceiling in August. But he’d balked at repaying the $2.2 million (despite having signed a personal guarantee) because, he said, the bank should have known when it made the loan that Graves wouldn’t be able to pay it back.

The litigious society

• An Illinois appeals court finally threw out a lawsuit in August, but not before the two-year-long battle had created a foot-high pile of legal filings on whether two “children” (now ages 23 and 20) could sue their mother for bad parenting. Among the claims were mom’s failure to send birthday cards or “care” packages during the kids’ college years, calling her daughter at midnight to ask that she return home from a party, and having once failed to take the girl to a car show.

• In 2009, unemployed stock-market analyst Todd Remis sued the man who photographed his 2003 wedding, claiming breach of contract because none of the 400 shots taken during the ceremony captured such key moments as the “last dance.” According to a November 2011 New York Times report, Remis is demanding not just the return of his $4,100 but that the photographer pay to re-create the missing scenes (including travel expenses for all 40 wedding guests). Remis and his wife have divorced; she’s returned to her native Latvia, and Remis doesn’t know how to Management consultant Graham Gibbons, 42, contact her.

• Consumer Rights: (1) In September, Jonathan was on trial in Cardiff, Wales, at press time, Rothstein of Encino, Calif., sued Procter & Gamble for selling its Crest toothpaste in “Neat Squeeze” packages that he said make it impossible to access the last 20 percent of the contents. (Rothstein wants the company to give everyone who bought Read News of the Weird daily Neat Squeeze packages 90 cents.) (2) The same with Chuck Shepherd at www. month, Sarah Deming of Keego Harbor, Mich., weirduniverse.net. Send items to sued the distributor of the movie Drive (starring weirdnews@earthlink.net or PO Ryan Gosling) for failing to deliver the fast-drivBox 18737, Tampa FL 33679 ing scenes promised in its trailers.

Compelling explanations

readdaily

charged with making a clandestine video of himself and his then girlfriend in bed. Gibbons insisted he’d made the video merely to analyze, for “efficiency,” the “time and motion” of his “performance,” as he might do for corporate clients.

(Despite his allegedly improved lovemaking, the girlfriend broke up with him.)

People with issues In November, an Austin, Texas, jury convicted Tommy Joe Kelly of slashing a stranger’s tire.

Acting as his own lawyer, Kelly told the jury: “OK, I’m going to tell you the truth on this one. It doesn’t sound right, but it is. I ... had hemorrhoids at that time, superduper bad.” (There have been 391 tire slashings in Kelly’s neighborhood over the last four years, but he was charged with only one count and sentenced to 10 years in jail.)

Least-competent criminals Robbers easily subdued: (1) Dale Foughty, 56, was charged with robbing a convenience store in Jacksonville, N.C., in October, despite attempting to intimidate the clerk by dressing as Spiderman.

The clerk poked Foughty in the stomach with a broom, sending him away empty-handed.

(2) Cody Smith, 18, was charged with snatching a woman’s purse in Johnson City, Tenn., in November. The victim chased Smith into nearby shrubbery, entangling him long enough for her to recover the purse. (3) In July, two men attempting to rob the Ace Smoke Shop in Altadena, Calif., fled after grabbing only part of the store’s cash — scared off by the manager’s barking Chihuahua.

Recurring themes Police usually employ “patience” when they believe a suspect has ingested drugs for smuggling, simply waiting for the drugs to appear in the toilet. On Oct. 12, Nigerian comic actor Babatunde Omidina (known as “Baba Suwe”) was detained before a flight at the Lagos airport because authorities suspected he’d ingested drugs to smuggle to Paris. Omadina denied the charge, but police locked him up and began monitoring his bowel movements. Omadina was released without charges Nov. 4 after 25 “evidence”-free deposits.

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wellness Remembrance of those lost

Local group holds candlelight vigil for Transgender Day of Remembrance

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by Caitlin Byrd As the sun began to set Nov. 20, about 50 people gathered outside the Asheville Civic Center. Bearing white candles and paper banners, they marched, silently and reverently, to the Vance Monument as part of the worldwide Transgender Day of Remembrance, which honors those who have been murdered.

“A lot of people, when they pass away from being murdered and being trans, they don’t have families, or they lost the life that they once had when they were identifying as another gender,” notes sam soper, founder/ president of Just Us For All, which co-sponsored the local event with Alliance, a UNCA student organization.

“Along with that goes that, basically, no one’s really paying them respect. There’s also just recognizing and looking at the amount of trans-phobic behavior in our society and how accepted it is in some ways.”

Even in Asheville, says Soper, people could do a better job of accepting the trans-

8 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Awareness, remembrance: To increase awareness and honor those who have been murdered, the local nonprofit Just Us for All hosts the Transgender Day of Remembrance each fall. Photos by Megan Dombroski gender community. “We still have tourists that come from out of town; we don’t have gender-neutral bathrooms, and I get questions a lot about trying to use different pronouns. People just aren’t educated on it; it’s something people just need to be exposed to and learn about.”

UNCA freshman Matthew Turpin, the community-outreach coordinator for Just Us For All, said he had to prepare himself for the emotional experience of participating in the Transgender Day of Remembrance.

“The transgender community is obviously underrepresented in society, and the violence against them can’t go unnoticed,” he explained. “If we continue in our society to cover it up, like the news not reporting it or reporting it with the incorrect pronouns and not really giving respect to the person, then

nothing will ever change, and they’ll just continue to be like an outsider to society.”

As a gay man, Turpin says he sees great value in such events. “If we go to a remembrance like this and we realize that the violence is happening, we’ll also realize that, ultimately, we can do something to change that. While there’s not something that’s just going to happen overnight, through education and the realization and acceptance, violence will decrease,” he says.X Send your health-and-wellness news and tips to Caitlin Byrd at mxhealth@mountainx.com or news@mountainx.com.

Caitlin Byrd is multimedia editor for the Blue Banner, the UNCA newspaper.

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wellnesscalendar calEndaR FoR novEmbER 30 - dEcEmbER 8, 2011

Health Programs Are You trying to Force Yourself to Change? (pd.) Emotional Brain Training (EBT) is a structured program that addresses the Emotional Root Cause of using Food, Alcohol/Drugs, Overspending, Overworking to feel pleasure, numb out, and/or comfort and soothe ourselves.

• Create a healthy lifestyle that promotes self compassion, brain health and grounded joy. Call 231-2107 or empowering.solutions@yahoo.com or visit website: www.ebt.org Park Ridge Health (pd.) Health Screenings with the Park Ridge Health WOW Van: Free Vision Screening for Adults and Children Vision Screenings are for near-sightedness, far-sightedness, color acuity and macular degeneration. Wednesday, November 30, Food Lion 3 – 6 p.m., 800 Greenville Hwy., Hendersonville Free Cholesterol Screenings Lipid and glucose profiles by finger stick, along with blood pressure and body mass index screening. For best results, fast overnight. Thursday, December 1, Rite Aide 8 – 11 a.m., 640 Spartanburg Hwy, Hendersonville Free EKG and Blood Pressure Friday, December 2, CVS 9 a.m. – Noon, 1604 Four Season’s Blvd., Hendersonville Free Blood Glucose and Blood Pressure No appointment required. Blood test for diabetes. Overnight fasting preferred. Tuesday, December 6, Biltmore Square Mall-The Health Adventure 8 – 11 a.m., 800 Brevard Rd., Asheville (Inside – No Van) Free Bone Density Screenings for Men and Women Bone density screening for osteoporosis. Please wear shoes and socks that are easy to slip off. Tuesday, December 6, Carolina Village 10 a.m. – 2 p.m., 600 Carolina Village Rd., Hendersonville Free Support Groups Breast Cancer Survivors and Friends Support Group Monday, December 5 (5:30 p.m.) Park Ridge Health Breast Center 50 Hospital Dr., Ste. 4B, Hendersonville Offered by the Park Ridge Breast Health Center and the American Cancer Society.

Join other breast cancer survivors, friends and those at high risk for breast cancer seeking support and information.

Please bring a favorite dish to share for a potluck dinner.

Support Group Christmas Party also. Please bring small gift to swap if desired. For information, please contact Debbie Gentry, at 828.650.2790. MemoryCaregivers Network Support Groups Park Ridge Group Tuesday, December 6, 1-3 p.m. Fletcher Adventist Church, Main Level Conference room 1141 Howard Gap Rd., Fletcher All MemoryCaregiver Network support groups are free and open to anyone caring for a person with memory loss. For further info contact Mary Donnelly, 828.230.4143 or network@memorycare. org. Upcoming Classes and Events For pre-registrations, please call 855-PRH-LIFE “Full Plate Lifestyle” Class Series Fridays, January 6 - February 24, noon – 1 p.m., Free In the Duke Room at Park Ridge Health. The “Full Plate Diet” is a weight loss program developed by leading healthcare professionals and behavioral specialists through the Lifestyle Center of America®. We have re-named it the “Full Plate Lifestyle”. We understand that diets usually work for most people, but they tend to be a quick-fix that is short sighted and focused on a number on the scale. We also understand the word lifestyle invites real change. This is not about how many pounds you lose. It is about the good habits you create, which in turn result in weight loss and decreases in hypertension, cardiovascular disease and diabetes. Pre-registration is required by January 2, 2012.

Smoking Cessation Course Mondays, January 9 - February 20 and Wednesday January 25 (extra day for Quit Week) from 5:30 to 7 p.m. Free. Held in the Wellness Department on the Park Ridge Health Campus. This smoking cessation series is designed by the American Lung Association (ALA) and administered by Park Ridge Health Wellness Certified Instructors. This course is considered the gold standard for smoking cessation. Seven week program with a total of eight sessions (one week has two sessions). Each session lasts approximately one-and-a-half hours. Pre-registration is required by January 2, 2012. Physician Seminar: “Touch Points: Addressing Challenging Behaviors in Children”

0 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Monday, January 23, 6 to 8 p.m., Free Held at The Health Adventure in Biltmore Square Mall. Join Dr. Charlotte Riddle with Park Ridge Pediatrics for a special session for parents.

Kids will have the opportunity to take part in a special activity while you learn. Refreshments will be served. Preregistration is required by January 18, 2012. Wellness Seminar: “Stress Management” Wednesday, February 1, Noon – 1 p.m. Free Held in the Duke Room at Park Ridge Health Lane Godsey, Ph.D., Park Ridge Medical Associates As January comes to a close, people tend to report feeling stressed and unhappy as the holidays are over, the accompanying bills are showing up, and winter has settled in.

Dr. Godsey will share strategies for dealing with stress for a healthier, happier you. No lunch will be served, feel free to bring your lunch from the café and learn while you eat.

Pre-registration is required by January 25, 2012, by calling 855-PRH-LIFE. Past Lives influence Wellness With Alice McCall (pd.) Free Talk: Saturday, December 3, 11am, Crystal Visions, Naples. • Learn how serious health/emotional issues may stem from past lives – with case studies! (828) 577-5623. www.healingpath.info the REAL Center (pd.) Offers life-changing skills including Nonviolent Communication (NVC), Radical Honesty, and Somatic Awareness. Learn to stay centered in any situation, be flexible without being submissive, and more. $120/8-session class in Asheville with Steve Torma, 828-254-5613. http://www.theREALcenter.org YWCA Club W Boot Camp (pd.) MONDAYS (12/5-9 and 12/12-16), 6:30-7:30 am.

Get in shape this season in the YWCA’s Club W Boot Camp. Improve cardio fitness and build lean muscle mass.

Pre and post assessments. 185 S. French Broad Ave. Cost: $100/members, $175/non-members. Info: www.ywcaofasheville.org or 254-7206.

Adrenal Fatigue Seminar • TH (12/8), 6pm - Shertech Pharmacy, 1642 Hendersonville Road, will host an adrenal fatigue seminar.

Free, but registration required. Info: 236-1097.

Chiropractic Screenings • WE (11/30), 5-8pm - Free spinal screenings by Fairview Chiropractic Center will be offered at The Rush Fitness Center, 1815 Hendersonville Road, Asheville. Complete in-office visits will be available for a $20 donation to the Fairview Food Bank. Info: www.fairviewchiropracticcenter. com.

• MO (12/5), 5-7pm - Free spinal screenings by Fairview Chiropractic Center will be offered at Biltmore Fitness, 711 Biltmore Ave., Asheville. Complete in-office visits will be available for a $20 donation to the Fairview Food Bank.

Info: www.fairviewchiropracticcenter.com.

Events at Pardee Hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall in Hendersonville. Free, but registration is required unless otherwise noted. Info and registration: www.pardeehospital.org or 692-4600.

• Free blood pressure screenings will be offered throughout the week. Call for times. Appointment not required.

• MONDAYS & THURSDAYS, 9:30am & WEDNESDAYS & FRIDAYS, 3pm - Flu vaccine. $25. Registration not required.0 • TUESDAYS, 5:30-6:30pm - TOPS: Take Off Pounds Sensibly weight-loss support group. Registration not required.

• TH (12/1), 3-4:30pm - “Balance and fall prevention.”

• FR (12/2), 8:30am-1pm - Red Cross blood drive.

Registration required.

• MO (12/5), 10am-noon - A workshop on makeup and hair accessories for female cancer patients. —- 12:301:30pm - Holiday Weight Management: Surviving the Feasting Season.

• TU (12/6), 1-3:30pm - A free, three-minute hereditary emphysema test and Q&A session. —- 10-11am - “Centering Menopause” will focus on chronic backaches.

Held at the Hendersonville YMCA, 810 6th Ave W.

• TU (12/6), 8:30am - Henderson County Mayors’ Advocacy Council For People With Disabilities, a committee for those who are interested in advocating for the disabled.

• TH (12/8), 8-10am - Glucose screening. Fasting required. $4. —- 1:30-2:30pm - An information session about chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. —- 34:30pm - Help For Shoulder Pain.

Holiday Blood Drive • SA (12/3), 10am-2:30pm - A holiday blood drive will be hosted by Sarge’s Animal Rescue Foundation and the American Red Cross. The Red Cross mobile unit will be parked at Sarge’s Adoption Center, 256 Industrial Drive, Waynesville. Call for appointment: 246-9050.

Nutrition 101 • MONDAYS, 5:15-6:15pm - This weekly course covers the fundamentals of nutrition. Topics include eating healthy on a budget, smart food choices wherever you are and what the food industry is not telling you. Held at Blitmore Premier Fitness, 711 Biltmore Ave. $7. Info: www.purelivingstrengthandnutrition.com or 617-407-5261.

Sound Healing Concert • SU (12/4) & (12/18), noon-1pm - Linda Go vocalizes with Billy Zanski on gongs, chakra bowls, kora and melodic percussion at Skinny Beats Drum Shop, 4 Eagle St. Vibrational healing for all. Info: 776-3786.

Weight Management Non-Surgical info Session • 1st WEDNESDAYS, 11am-noon & 3rd THURSDAYS, 6:45-7:45pm - A non-surgical info session will be held at Mission Weight Management Center, 2 Medical Park Drive, Suite 102. Info: www.missionmd.org/weightmanagement or 213-4100.

Weight Management Surgical info Session • 1st & 3rd TUESDAYS, 5:30-6:30pm & 4th FRIDAYS, 1-2pm - Weight management surgical info session will take place at Mission Weight Management Center, 2 Medical Park Drive, Suite 102. Info: www.missionmd.org/weightmanagement or 213-4100.

Support Groups Adult Children Of Alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families ACOA is an anonymous 12-step, “Twelve Tradition” program for women and men who grew up in alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional homes. Info: www.adultchildren.org.

• FRIDAYS, 7pm - “Inner Child” meets at Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. Info: 989-8075.

• SUNDAYS, 3pm - “Living in the Solution” meets at The Servanthood House, 156 E. Chestnut St. Open big book study. Info: 989-8075.

• MONDAYS, 7pm - “Generations” meets at First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 474-5120.

Al-Anon Al-Anon is a support group for the family and friends of alcoholics. More than 33 groups are available in the WNC area. Info: www.wnc-alanon.org or 800-286-1326.

• WEDNESDAYS, 5:45pm - An Al-Anon meeting for women will be held at Grace Covenant Presbyterian Church, 798 Merrimon Ave. at Gracelyn Road. Newcomers welcome.

• WEDNESDAYS, 7pm - Al-Anon meeting at Grace Covenant Presbyterian Church, 798 Merrimon Ave. at Gracelyn Road. Newcomers welcome.

• THURSDAYS, 7pm - “Parents of Children with Alcoholism,” West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road.

• FRIDAYS, 12:30pm - “Keeping the Focus,” First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. —- 8pm - “Lambda,” Cathedral of All Souls, 9 Swan St. • SATURDAYS, 10am - “Grace Fireside,” Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. —- 10am - “Saturday Serenity,” St. Mary’s Episcopal Church, Charlotte Street at Macon Avenue. —- noon - “Courage to Change,” Bess Sprinkle Memorial Library, Weaverville.

• SUNDAYS, 5pm - Al-Anon and Alateen, West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road.

wellnesscontinued • MONDAYS, noon - “Keeping the Focus,” First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. —- 6pm - “Attitude of Gratitude,” Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. —- 7pm - Meeting at First Christian Church, 201 Blue Ridge Road, Black Mountain.

• TUESDAYS, 9:45am - “Serenity Through Courage and Wisdom,” St. Barnabas Catholic Church, 109 Crescent Hill, Arden. —- 5:30pm - “Steps to Recovery,” Kenilworth Presbyterian Church, 123 Kenilworth Road. —- 7pm - “One Day at a Time,” First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Co-Dependents Anonymous A fellowship of men and women whose common purpose is to develop healthy relationships.

• SATURDAYS, 11am - Meeting at First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 779-2317 or 299-1666.

Debters and Underearners Anonymous • MONDAYS, 7pm - The local chapter of Debtors Anonymous, a 12-step program, meets at Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road.

Underearners Anonymous meets at 8pm. Info: www. debtorsanonymous.org, underearnersanonymous.org or 704-299-8909.

Events at Pardee Hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall in Hendersonville. Free, but registration is required unless otherwise noted. Info and registration: www.pardeehospital.org or 692-4600.

• WEDNESDAYS, noon-1:30pm & 5:30-7pm - Vet Center Out Station, a support group for veterans. Registration not required.

• MONDAYS, 2-3pm - “It Works,” a 12-step program for individuals struggling to overcome food addiction.

Registration not required. Info: 489-7259.

• TU (12/6) & TU (12/10), 6:30-8pm - Bipolar support group. Registration not required.

• WE (12/7), 10-11:30am - Diabetes support group.

Registration not required.

• TH (12/8), 5-6:30pm - NAMI adult support group for adults and families dealing with mental illness.

Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous • THURSDAYS, 6:30pm - Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous will meet at Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road, Asheville. Info: 9893227. grief Support groups • CarePartners’ bereavement support services are available to anyone who has suffered a loss through death.

Weekly grief support groups, a relaxation group, a Grief Choir, Yoga for Grievers and one-on-one counseling available. Donations accepted. Info: kcaldwell@carepartners. org or 251-0126.

Magnetic Minds • WEDNESDAYS, 7pm-9pm - A meeting of Magnetic Minds, the local chapter of the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance, provides support, information and advocacy for those with mood disorders. Friends and family welcome. Held at 1314F Patton Ave. Info: 318-9179.

Man to Man/Prostate Cancer Support • 1st TUESDAYS, 7pm - Man to Man, a prostate cancer support group for men and caregivers, meets at American Cancer Society, 120 Executive Park in Asheville. Info: 254-6931.

Marshall Alcoholics Anonymous Meeting • FRIDAYS, 8pm - AA meeting at Marshall Presbyterian Church, 165 South Main St. Info: soletpj@gmail.com.

Mission Weight Management Surgical Support group • 1st & 3rd WEDNESDAYS, 6-7:30pm & 4th FRIDAYS, 10-11:30am - Weight Management Surgical Support Group will meet at Mission Weight Management Center, 2 Medical Park Drive, Suite 102. Info: www.missionmd. org/weightmanagement or 828-213-4100.

Overcomers Recovery Support group A Christian-based, 12-step recovery program. Provides a spiritual plan of recovery for people struggling with life-

controlling problems. Meetings are held at S.O.S. Anglican Mission, 370 N. Louisiana Ave., Suite C-1. All are welcome. Info: rchovey@sos.spc-asheville.org or 575-2003.

• MONDAYS, 6pm - A support group for men.

• TUESDAYS, 7pm - A support group for women.

Overeaters Anonymous A fellowship of individuals who, through shared experience, strength and hope, are recovering from compulsive overeating. This 12-step program welcomes everyone who wants to stop eating compulsively. Meetings are one hour unless otherwise noted.

• THURSDAYS, 6:30pm - Hendersonville: O.A. Step Study group at the Cox House, 723 N. Grove St. Info: 329-1637.

• THURSDAYS, noon - Asheville: Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road (S. 25 at Yorkshire). Info: 298-1899.

• SATURDAYS, 9:30am - Black Mountain: Carver Parks and Recreation Center, 101 Carver Ave. off Blue Ridge Road. Open relapse and recovery meeting. Info: 6690986.

• MONDAYS, 6pm - Asheville: First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 252-4828.

• MONDAYS, 6:30pm - Hendersonville: Balfour United Methodist Church, 2567 Asheville Highway. Info: 800580-4761.

• TUESDAYS, 10:30am-noon - Asheville: Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. at Ottari. Info: 280-2213.

Pet Loss and grief Support group • 1st SUNDAYS, 3-5pm - A pet loss and grief support group welcomes those coping with the loss of a pet through death or other events. Held at Pet Harmony, 803 Fairview St. Info: tosetti.cappy@gmail.com or 707-7203.

Sexaholics Anonymous • DAILY - A 12-step fellowship of men and women recovering from compulsive patterns of lust, romance, destructive relationships, sexual thoughts or sexual behavior. Daily Asheville meetings. Call confidential voicemail 237-1332 or e-mail saasheville@gmail.com. Info: www.orgsites. com/nc/saasheville SLAA (Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous) • SATURDAYS, 10-11am - Do you want to stop living out a destructive pattern of sex and love addiction over which you are personally powerless? This 12-step-based recovery program meets at 20 Oak St. Info: www.slaafws. org or ashevilleslaa@gmail.com. the Compassionate Friends • 1st MONDAYS, 7-8:30pm - The local chapter of an international support group for parents grieving the loss of a child will meet at Arden Presbyterian Church, 2215 Hendersonville Road. Info: 693-4061 thursday Women’s Al-Anon • THURSDAYS, 6pm - Held at New Hope Presbyterian Church, 3020 Sweeten Creek Road, Asheville. Newcomers welcome. Info: ssassymomma@yahoo.com.

WNC Cesarean Community • 1st MONDAYS - A safe forum for women and families to share their Cesarean birth stories and support others in the community with similar experiences. Meets from 10am-noon at 4th Trimester Family Center, 65 Hill St., and from 6-8pm at Spa Materna, 640 Merrimon Ave. Info: laurenhickman@live.com.

moRE WEllnEss EvEnts onlInE

Check out the Wellness Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after December 8.

Eating Right for Good Health presented by

Plan So You Don’t Panic Leah McGrath, RD, LDN Corporate Dietitian, Ingles Markets

Food for Emergencies

Portions of this article originally appeared in http://inglesnutrition. blogspot.com/2011/01/plan-so-you-dont-panic-food-for.html

Typically when people hear of an impending snow event they make a mad rush for their local Ingles and buy eggs, bread, milk, ....plus anything that they feel they can’t live without for a few days, or perhaps they’re just planning massive meals featuring French toast. This means that store shelves are quickly wiped out for some of these basics and I start seeing tweets with photos of the quintessential “empty bread shelves”.

Here are some ways to plan a bit better so you are more prepared in case of a snow event.

Bread - We sell frozen dough and breads and rolls and bread,roll and cookie and cake mixes can be found on the grocery aisles. Bake it or make it. Keep these items in your freezer or pantry.

Milk - Stock UHT (Ultra High Temperature) milk that is shelf stable for 6 months, powdered milk or evaporated milk in your pantry.

Eggs - In addition to fresh eggs we sell liquid eggs in Dairy and Frozen.

Fruit and Vegetables - Keep frozen fruit and vegetables in your freezer and DRIED fruit and CANNED fruit and vegetables in your pantry.

If you know snow is on the way buy a whole chicken, turkey or a roast and cook it ahead of time so you can eat from it for a few days. Cook soups and chili in a crockpot. If the power goes out you can also cook on an outdoor grill.

Keep canned chicken and fish like salmon, sardines and tuna in the pantry for meals and sandwiches.

Nut butters and jelly, cereal, and meal replacement bars are also good to have on hand.

Don’t forget pet food, baby food/formula, toilet paper, candles, matches and batteries for flashlight and of course a few gallons of water for drinking. In addition to these necessary items there may be some other must-haves for your family...chocolate and popcorn are two that we like to keep around.

Leah McGrath: Follow me on Twitter www.twitter.com/InglesDietitian Work: 800-334-4936

calEndaR dEadlInE

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m.

WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication.

Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

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Where to catch the rolling java In the Pacific Northwest, coffee trucks are everywhere. Parking lots, roadsides, wherever they can stop and vend the java to a bleary-eyed populace dazed from eight-straight months of cloud cover.

In Asheville, coffee trucks are a newer thing. And now there are several aiming to get your drivethrough brewed-bean bucks. Here’s a look at three.

jWbb]Whoi$Yec

keep on truckin’: The Greg and Andi behind the name. Photos by Bill Rhodes

get your daily roasting What: greg & Andi’s curbside coffee Where: 172 Charlotte St. When: Monday through Saturday, 7 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. signature item: All of the coffee beans are roasted fresh daily.

Greg Bounds can be considered one of the earliest pioneers of the food-truck movement in Asheville — he founded the Double Decker Coffee Bus on Biltmore Avenue. Now, he spends much of his time roasting beans with Andi O’Gorman: The two founded Asheville Coffee Roasters.

“Every day we roast the coffee at 3 a.m. at our shop up in Woodfin,” says Bounds. “That’s been our main business for the last 12 years. People come in and get their fresh coffee [that we source] from all over the world.” The roasters buy directly from farms in many cases, and all coffee is organic and fair trade.

A peek inside the truck reveals a beautiful — albeit tiny — interior, like a coffee shop in dollhouse proportions with nice wood floors. The duo, Bounds says, has experience in making small spaces work — they’ve run coffee kiosks everywhere from hospitals to airports.

This truck comes with a bonus feature: Greg & Andi’s Curbside Coffee is located in the parking lot of the HomeSource Design Center, where samplesized decks will accommodate seating next to a built-in waterfall.

NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011

thank you, mr. minor: The Ursa Minor coffee truck brings caffeine to the people of the RAD.

ursa minor in the morning sky service with a smirk: The unofficial Izzy’s motto can be found emblazoned on bumper stickers available, along with plenty of caffeine, at the new truck.

izzy’s coffee truck north — nizzy’s?

What: izzy’s coffee truck Where: 501 Merrimon Ave. When: Monday through Friday, 7:30 to 11 a.m. item of interest: The truck’s horn plays the theme to The Godfather This truck is located in the parking lot of Luella’s Bar-B-Que — just try to not crave ribs when you’re waiting for your coffee within scenting distance of the restaurant’s smoker.

Jeremy Hargroves runs the truck, an interesting vehicle that morphs from nondescript van to teeny-tiny coffee shop in no time. The menu here reflects that of the downtown Izzy’s coffee shop. The upside? Quick-hit, pull-through service with no need for downtown parking. The downside? “Sorry, there’s no Tenety here,” jokes Hargroves, referring to the Izzy’s owners’ adorable toddler.

The pumpkin latte is especially popular, says Hargroves. He also offers a pour-over-style cup of joe and a good, strong Americano.

What: ursa minor coffee truck Where: 191 Lyman St. When: Monday through Friday, 8 a.m. until 2:30 p.m. hit beverage: Salted-caramel latte The Ursa Minor coffee truck was the first in operation of the three mobile joe units featured here. Ursa Minor originally opened on Swannanoa River Road earlier this year, but has since moved to Lyman Street in the River Arts District. Considering this interaction caught by Xpress on the first day we stopped by Ursa’s old spot (next to Asheville Bolt and Screw), it might have been a wise decision: “A man in a big red pickup truck rolls slowly through the parking lot, then stops by Masem’s blue truck, embellished with big yellow stars. Eyeing the bottle of honey on the counter used for sweetening tea, the man asks, ‘Whatcha sellin’ here, molasses?’ When he learns that Masem has only coffee and tea on board, the man looks momentarily confused, wishes us a good day, and rolls on through.”

Ursa Minor offers local baked goods, smoothies, teas, bulk coffee and more.

And what does Masem think about all the new trucks? He’s “psyched.”

“When you have three mobile coffee units, that means there’s demand; All ships float in a rising tide.”

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snAcks, sAusAges & smoke LocAL chefs hAve chARcuteRie And otheR Bites on the tABLe by mackensy Lunsford Home for the holidays is a nice notion, but having family around for too long can get claustrophobic. Whether you want to round up the troops and head out or just make a solo escape, chances are good that you won’t want to eat heavily before any of the inevitable big meals.

In talking to area chefs about good small-plate options, we decided to focus primarily on charcuterie. If you’re not familiar with the word, you’re most likely familiar with the concept. It’s the culinary art of turning meats into terrines, galantines, confit, sausages, etc., in order to preserve them. In an effort to use every last bit of the animal, chefs all over are turning to smokers and other curing methods to turn castoffs into something useful and delicious. But, don’t think it’s all about weird parts and pieces.

For some, it’s a matter of practicing and refining a craft, and for others, it’s born out of a way to get creative with certain limiting factors. Here are a handful of places around Asheville where you can find someone making charcuterie.

go south, young man the southern kitchen and Bar is somewhat limited by building codes as the kitchen can’t be equipped with the traditional ventilation hood. Translation: no sautéing over an open flame, no grill and lots of making do with creative thinking.

Chef Terri Roberts and crew manage to turn out some very good food using convection ovens, sous vide cookery, panini presses and a little smoker box.

Chris Saffles and Jay Parrino skirt technical limitations with oldchairman of the board: Jay Parrino of The Southern presides over some of his and Chris Saffles’ charcuterie work.

Photos by Bill Rhodes

6 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

fashioned know-how. The two cure an assortment of charcuterie that includes bresaola, sausages and salami. The Southern serves an ambitious meat board supplemented with a cheese selection that (sometimes) includes a buttermilk blue and a Grayson taleggio, plus housemade pickles, jams and a smattering of olives. A fantastic duck ham with a rind of meltingly rich fat is made by de-boning, rolling and tying the legs and breast, then packing the meat in a salt-and-sugar cure spiked with aromatics like shallots, garlic, rosemary, oregano and thyme. After a short curing time, it’s served with a frisée-and-brie salad. “It’s almost like making gravlax,” Saffles says. “I just

the goods: A selection of charcuterie at The Southern, including pistachio mortadella, bresaola, merguez, salami cotto and a luganega sausage. let it sit for three days like that, then I rinse it off and smoke it to an internal temp of about 130 to 135.” Three days is no time compared to the pepperoni, which takes about two months to cure.

The crew also makes foccacia, pickles and is about to start making hamburger buns. “We’re making pretty much everything in-house now,” says Parrino. Many of the preparations

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 7

are a challenge with the equipment they have (or more accurately, don’t have), but they make it work. “The fact that we don’t have that stuff gives me more incentive to do more with the meat-and-cheese board,” says Parrino. “There’s more of a necessity to do things like that, so we can bring in interesting products,” Saffles adds.

“I don’t have an open flame, so what’s the point of bringing in duck? It forces you figure out other things that you can do with it.”

And to good end, we hasten to add.

The Southern Kitchen and Bar is located at 41 N. Lexington Ave. southernkitchenandbar.com, and will be open Christmas Eve, closed on Christmas.

in the belly of the storm storm Rhum Bar is working on perfecting the art of the cocktailaccompanying nosh. Besides great drinks like the Devil’s Oasis (rum, passion-fruit, cayenne-infused honey, lime), the restaurant offers a number of small plates, along with full entrees. Particularly good for a bar snack is the three-cheese macaroni with jalapeños and bacon, served in a small or large portion. Chef Owen McGlynn, however, doesn’t stop at pasta when it comes to smoked belly meat.

Especially intriguing is the lamb bacon, which McGlynn carves from the whole animal and smokes inhouse. Storm’s charcuterie plate often

8 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

What a ham: Storm’s chef, Owen McGlynn, sprinkles a mixture of salt, paprika and other spices on a cut of pork he’ll turn into tasso ham. features housemade tasso ham, and always includes various short-cure items, like patés. “They’re constantly changing, but I usually have three different kinds,” says McGlynn. He’s no stranger to making the best of what’s on the table; he regularly utilizes liver, hearts, chicken gizzards and pig heads that local farmers bring to him. It’s a good way to make sure that nothing gets wasted, he says.

“The way I was taught, when you get the whole hog, you use the head to the tail, and this was before people were even getting into that style. But it’s something that I enjoy doing; it’s a passion.” So much of a passion, in fact, that he cures salami in his spare time at home for his own use.

Part of what appeals to McGlynn about the art of charcuterie is the effort required to get it right — and getting it right is important. “It’s sensitive. It’s as much science as cooking — getting the molds right and the temperature.” Right now, McGlynn’s curing some lamb pancetta that should be ready some time in the early part of next year. Storm Rhum Bar is located at 125 S. Lexington Ave. stormrhumbar.com, and will be open for Christmas Eve, closed on Christmas.

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The Chop Shop butcher shop makes a range of smoked meats and sausages, as well as housemade hot dogs. Butcher Karen Fowler says that the braunschweiger, a pork liver and bacon sausage, has been turning out perfectly. Currently, the shop offers it at $8 a pound. “We try to package them smaller so that they’re more affordable,” says. Check out their baconwurst, classic andouille and chorizo and Portuguese linguica, too. “People have been going nuts over that,” she says. The Chop Shop also offers chicken sausages, liver pates and various long-cure charcuterie like mortadella and soprasatta. Mustards, pickles and finishing vinegars can also be found at the shop. The Chop Shop is located at 100 Charlotte St. chopshopbutchery.com

table talk It’s a tiny bar that table has, but it’s big enough to belly up to. Table has an extensive wine list, a selection of “tastes” that deserve a look and an array of larger-than-tastes-but smaller-than-entrees plates, including a selection of house-cured meats and artisanal cheeses.

Chef/owner Jacob Sessoms, chef Matthew Dawes and Jeremy Hardcastle always have some sort of long-cure charcuterie doing its thing in dedicated coolers. Frequent projects include traditional Italian salamis or the French-style saucisson sec. The crew is currently developing their version of country-style ham. Short-cure items made at Table include various patés and hot dogs and, while you can’t sample the hot dogs on the charcuterie board, they do appear as corn dogs on the menu at Sessoms’ other restaurant, Tod’s Tasties on Montford Avenue.

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The reasons that Table creates charcuterie are many, says Sessoms. “As cooks, it’s kind of a logical progression,” he says. “We don’t want to do the same thing day in and day out, and it’s kind of a challenge to go beyond the comfort realm. And obviously, it’s trendy across the country now — it’s part of the farm-to-table, whole animal consumption, nose-totail eating,” he explains. And finally, “Not only was it born out of culinary tradition, it was born out of a way to save money,” he says. And every restaurant owner likes to save a little money while still selling something delicious.

Sessoms and company hope to build a kitchen exclusively for charcuterie retail and wholesale. “It would just take the time and energy to build the facility,” he says.

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need moRe? Here are a few more suggestions for small-plate dining. Be sure to call the restaurant for holiday hours. For more on eateries in our area, visit Xpress’ restaurant guide at avleats.com.

Rezaz enoteca: A Biltmore Village mainstay, the wine bar that adjoins chef Reza Setayesh’s well-loved Mediterranean restaurant features antipasti selections that diners can mix and match over wine.

28 Hendersonville Road. rezaz.com, 277-1510. cucina : Chef Brian Canipelli opened his modern-Italian restaurant on Wall Street in 2007 and it continues to get better. Don’t skip the antipasti selections in the beginning of the menu, which seem more like welldressed tapas from Italy. 24 Wall St. cucina24restaurant.com, 254-6175. cúrate: This tapas bar hums on weekends. If you’re lucky, you can sidle up to the bar and pore over the restaurant’s very interesting wine list and taste some jamón Ibérico de bellota. 11 Biltmore Ave. curatetapasbar. com, 239-2946. never Blue on Broadway: This brand-new small-plates restaurant recently opened on Broadway in downtown Asheville and, if you pick wisely, Never Blue can offer one of the best values in town. 27 Broadway St. theneverblue.com, 255-2710.

Zambra: Since chef Adam Bannasch took over this tapas bar, the food has become increasingly progressive and unique. In our opinion, Zambra only gets better with age. 85 West Walnut St. zambratapas.com, 232-1060.

&

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munching at the Junction the Junction in the River Arts District makes for a great escape any time.

The Junction has fantastic seasonal cocktails and a menu that focuses on updated classics — chef Camp Boswell’s favorite dish in this vein being the sweet tea-brined and fried Ashley Farms chicken served with caramelized onion gravy. Speaking of updated classics, Boswell runs various charcuterie items on the menu such as a cured and smoked pork belly, house sausages and other bites that require a shorter curing time.

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sAy cheese To find cheese for a crowd, head to the Onyx Orchard Cheese Company, which carries domestic and imported selections. Onyx is located at 89 Patton Ave. 254-0340. ways beyond sautéing, grilling and roasting. “It’s just something new that a lot of people don’t have experience with,” he says.

And why does he still spend his time making such things? “For me, charcuterie is just interesting. It’s such an old art form that basically evolved out of necessity,” he says. “This was what people were using back before refrigeration existed; this was their method of preserving their meats and foods to make them last longer.” Also, Boswell says, it’s gratifying to utilize atypical cuts and prepare them in

That’s part of the art of cooking, anyway; taking something with classic roots and making it new. 348 Depot St., 225-3497. The restaurant/bar will be closed Christmas Eve and Christmas.

Send your food news and story ideas to food@mountainx.com.

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Onyx Orchard Cheese Company owner Tim Pierce also offers wine and sandwiches at his shop.

With the upcoming changes to the Junction’s winter hours — no more lunch, but Saturday and Sunday brunch starting early next year — Boswell will have time to focus on more elaborate charcuterie. He was first exposed to the art in earnest when he worked for Chris Hastings, the chef/owner of Hot & Hot Fish Club Birmingham, Ala. and a two-time James Beard Award finalist. “We had everything from duck prosciutto to pickled beef tongue, all sorts of different pickles, all kinds of smoked meat and sausages,” Boswell says.

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has to offer without committing to an entire meal. “For the general public, it’s a good way to come sit at the bar and have a cocktail and a meat board and see Table at an inexpensive rate,” says Sessoms. Table is located at 48 College St. tableasheville.com and will be open Christmas Eve, closed on Christmas.

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EschEwing thE Eggnog

choosing winEs for thE holiday-party sEason

by Mackensy lunsford The holiday season is a celebratory time of year, full of friends and family — many of them getting all kinds of snookered on liquid cheer. Egg nog (though hopelessly heavy) has its place, but we think wine — red, white or rosé — is the best way to celebrate with a little bit of class. And, with a little know-how, not too much money.

Stocking plenty of wine also means getting to skip the mixers, ice cubes and swizzle sticks, but the oceans of lousy or overpriced wine can be vast and daunting. Although choosing wine sometimes feels intimidating, it really doesn’t have to be. Many people still get flummoxed when it’s their responsibility to supply the fete with the liquid refreshments, says Matt Logan, the owner of 5 Walnut Wine Bar. “It can be such a nerve-wracking experience

42 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

for so many people; they’re so worried about what’s good or not.” Puzzled over what wine to serve with your holiday meals? Wonder what pumpkin pie spice or cranberries will do to your palate? Fortunately, we have Parris Benight, the wine director and manager of 5 Walnut, to guide us.

hubba bubble Want a no-fail festive drink for any occasion? Just pop open the bubbly, says Benight. See how easy that was?

“People always think that Champagne is only for New Year’s Eve, and I want to get people out of that mindset,” she says. “You can drink sparkling wine any time.” We trust that you’ll absorb that information responsibly.

And, by the way, just because it doesn’t say Champagne on the label doesn’t

holly jolly: Parris Benight holds a cava cocktail (recipe on pg. 43).

Photos by Bill Rhodes mean it’s not good. But in this economy, you probably already know that. While Champagne comes from a specific area in France, located about 100 miles from Paris, “You get great sparkling wine from all over,” says Benight.

“You have cava from Spain, there’s prosecco, which comes from Italy, and that tends to be in the more off-dry style — not necessarily sweet, but a little bit fruitier,” she says. “Whereas cava tends to be a little bit more tart.”

Champagne and other sparkling wines from France, as well as sparklers from California, tend to be on the

yeasty side, she says.

And while it’s often hard to find inexpensive true Champagne, that’s not the case with prosecco and cava. “You can find great replacements,” says Benight. At 5 Walnut, she pours SaintHilaire sparkling wines, an excellent value for the quality, she says. SaintHilaire comes from the Limoux region of France, which actually began producing sparkling wine more than a century before Champagne got into the game. “They coined it; they started making it in the methode tradicionale, the same method as Champagne; Champagne just did a better marketing job,” says Benight. “But Limoux is the original sparkling wine region.

That works great for us because we get the bottle for a quarter of the price of Champagne.” Saint-Hilaire wines can be also be found at the Appalachian Vintner in south Asheville, at Bouchon restaurant in downtown Asheville, among other places — just ask your local wine shop.

a rosé by any other name The name-calling has got to stop, people. Rosé has suffered unfairly from false stereotypes for far too long; not all rosé, for example, tastes like white zinfandel.

“Yep, that’s what ruined it,” says Benight. “Fortunately, especially over the past few years, rosé has started to become more up-and-coming, especially among people who drink wine.”

The trick, she says, is just to get people to taste it. “Once people try it, they’re hooked. It can be very dry, it can be fruity, or you can go with the earthier French styles of rosé.”

It would be a shame to pass on the pink. Rosé is a highly versatile wine that can be paired with anything from fish to fowl. “It’s light enough to go with the turkey, but it could stand up to something that has a little more flavor, like ham,” says Benight. “You can go with different regions; the Spanish rosés are going to have a little bit of spice to them, which is good for all of the seasonings that go with holiday foods. French rosés tend to be a little bit more earthy if you’re doing things like collard greens or sautéed mushrooms with garlic.”

Benight recommends the Adelsheim pinot noir rosé from Willamette Valley, a wine that 5 Walnut sometimes sells by the glass. “It is fantastic. I have turned on so many people that think they don’t like rosé and say they don’t want to try it. I tell them to take a little sip because it’s so earthy — it has that kind of dirty strawberry flavor to it. It’s very dry and very nice.”

pEar cidEr cocktail Want a bubbly cocktail that won’t pack too much of a wallop and has a local focus? Benight recommends making cava-cider cocktail, an easyto-throw-together drink that 5 Walnut sometimes serves on Sundays.

“It’s half cava (sparkling wine from Spain), half pear cider, which has alcohol in it, and just a splash of local apple cider. We’ve been garnishing it with a slice of apple and a cinnamon stick. That’s the perfect kickoff to any party. It’s kind of like a mulled cider, but fruitier, more refreshing, easydrinking — it’s absolutely delicious.”

Merry, merry: Classic, bubbly and sweet, this cava cocktail’s a crowd-pleaser.

Benight is also a huge fan of sparkling rosé. Real men aren’t afraid of pink

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 43

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bubbles, folks. “Anyone can drink it,” she says. “It’s very sexy and it’s fun.

It’s great for New Year’s Eve — there’s no better way to kick off the new year than with a glass of brut sparkling rosé.”

winter whites Think the days of white wine end when the mercury starts to dip? Think again. White wine doesn’t have to be a summer porch drink. Gewürztraminer, for example, is rich and bold and goes well with holiday foods, says Benight.

“It has nice spice and fruit — it’s a good winter white.”

Godello is also a good choice, she says. “It’s almost like the Spanish chardonnay. It has that really rich flavor and tends to be oak-aged like chardonnay, so you get the spice, you get the vanilla, you get the oakiness and richness.”

And viogniers, she says, are “delightful. They’re huge and floral. You don’t really need food with them; they’re perfect by themselves.”

The key to all whites, she says, is not to over-chill them. “Americans tend to enjoy their wines too cold, where you can’t really taste the flavors. If you let these wines warm up a little bit, 45 to 50 degrees, you get the full effect of the wine. You get all of the different

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flavors, and you’re not freezing cold, drinking freezing-cold wine, in freezing-cold weather.”

rockin’ reds On to reds — ‘tis the season, after all.

“You can start with lighter and go to heavy, but reds are perfect wines for the holidays,” Benight says.

Pinot noir, she says, has become the turkey standby. “And as it should be.

It’s got the bright fruit flavors, nice acidity, slight spice and real earthiness, depending on what regions you go to.” South American pinot noirs show spice, she says. Burgundian pinot noirs and those from Oregon display earthy characteristics.

“But if you want to get away from pinot noir, try Gamay,” she says. “It’s also light-bodied, has a nice acidity and bright fruit, but it has more of the baking spices — the clove, the nutmeg, the cinnamon.”

And don’t forget that it’s Beaujolais season, she says. “When I talk Beaujolais, I’m not talking Beaujolais nouveau,” says Benight. “That’s meant to be [consumed] six months after bottling and there’ not really a whole lot to it. But true Beaujolais — there’s 10 crus in Beaujolais that produce delicious Gamays that are age-worthy and have all the qualities of a good pinot noir. It’s just a different grape with something different to offer.”

Benight also recommends zweigelt, an Austrian grape with similar characteristics. “Who’s drinking zweigelt?

You’ve got to be talking to some people that are into wine to tell you this is a delicious grape,” she says. “We pour it by the glass and people love it.”

But, no matter what, there’s one rule to remember, says Benight: “You can drink whatever wine you want, whatever season you want, as long as you enjoy it.”

Send your food news to food@ mountainx.com.

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Les Doss of Vinsite wine shop located on 64 Broadway St. (vinsiteasheville.com) recommends the following bottles, which he and co-owner Kathy Taylor stock at the shop: For a sparkler, a Gruet Blanc de Noirs sparkling NV ($15.99). “It’s rich and toasty with juicy, light raspberry flavors and aggressive mousse with a creamy texture. Might be the best sparkling wine made in America for the money.”

For a white, Gunther Steinmetz Riesling Tröcken 2009 ($15.99). “Peachy sweet tarts with Granny Smith apples and bright citrus,” says Doss.

“Refreshing with a nice touch of minerality. This is a guzzler, not a sipper.”

For a red, Bernard Baudry Chinon Les Granges 2010 ($20.99) “Complex and refreshing with aromas of ripe fruit and forest floor, along with a touch of funk,” Doss says.

Christopher Curtis of santé wine bar (which offers retail wine as well) says that bubbles are not only festive, but they make for great food wines, too. Santé offers a fully sparkling, dry rosé Lambrusco by Cleto Chiarli ($18).

“They call it their ‘Brut de Noir’ rosé,” says Curtis. “It’s super pretty and delicate, with a beautiful light pink, almost peachy color, fine bubbles and aromas of strawberry and raspberry.”

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Several local oenophiles offered suggestions for holiday wine:

Curtis also likes a Lioco Pinot Noir called NoCo ($25). “It’s kind of midway between the French and Cali style.

It’s elegant and structured and earthy, but still has some great lush cherry and dark berry fruit to it — and Pinot is always a great and versatile food wine.”

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CHOW DOWN AND PUT UP

LOCAL AUTHOR TALKS HOMEMADE LIVING

By Maggie Cramer Now is not the time to put away your aprons, Thanksgiving-weary chefs.

There are still traditional holiday meals left to make, and ‘tis the season to “put up,” or preserve, food for the winter.

Lucky for us, this time of year is ideal for filling and sealing those Mason jars, says Ashley English, local author of the “Homemade Living” book series, a collection that showcases topics related to smallscale homesteading. The books are warm, funny and practical guides to everything from raising chickens to preserving and canning. She also writes about everyday life on a small farm in Candler at her blog, Small Measure (small-measure.blogspot.

A very jammin’ holiday: ‘Tis the season to stay inside and bake, jar and can away. Local author/blogger Ashley English tells you how. com/). English recommends grabbing what seasonal selections are left and learning how to preserve them for the months of pale grocery-store tomatoes ahead.

English practically makes a ritual of the Slow Food lifestyle, turning in to the heat of the kitchen when it’s cold outside. “Tending to simmering pots of this and that as the whole house fills with warmth feels right in a way that’s difficult to articulate,” she says.

“It feels ceremonial, as though the act

of storing away food for the impending dip in mercury is an homage to the harvest. It also feels primordial, squirreling away food for the winter in a manner akin to that of the other creatures we share this terrain with.”

But where do you start? For English, it’s always with local apples. “I’m a lifelong fan of all things apple,” she says. “Any apple, prepared in any manner, at any time.” Every fall, she picks from local orchards and her mother’s bountiful tree, then heads home and whips up batches of apple butter and applesauce, which she says is one of the easiest ways to ensure you can enjoy local food while waiting on spring. We’ve provided one of English’s recipes for apple butter in these pages.

“It’s so simple to peel, core and chop apples, put them in a pot with some water, and cook them into soft, saucy submission,” she says. From there, English advises either canning or freezing for quick picking come winter. Fuji, Gala, Jonagold, Golden Delicious and Macintosh varieties top her list for applesauce and butters.

She prefers Rome, Stayman, Winesap, Pink Lady and Empire for baking.

Apples aren’t the only local foods currently available for ferreting away.

English advises stocking up on winter squash and onions, which store well in a root cellar — and if you’ve got one of those, lucky you. English stashes root vegetables (imagine that) in hers, which she loves almost as much as apples. “From roasted parsnips to celeriac slaw, I’m an equal-opportunity root-vegetable eater.” She suggests root-veggie soups, with some local beef, chicken or other protein added in. “They can be easily pressure-canned and made pantry-ready for cold, snowy nights,” she says. And when it comes to preserving local cabbage, which is abundant now, English likes to ferment, and references Wild Fermentation by Sandor Katz and Nourishing Traditions by Sally Fallon as recipe resources.

There’s also local honey, which will last on your shelf as long as you let it. English uses local honey in everything. “It goes into my tea, on my morning yogurt and in any number of baked goods coming out of my kitchen during the holidays.” Snag one of her holiday honey favorites, Holiday Rounds, with the recipe we’ve provided.

English loves heading out to December’s holiday tailgate markets to be sure she has enough honey and to load up on end-of-year crops. She uses all preservation methods — canning, freezing (which retains all the nutrients), drying (especially for fruits) — to help her get through the winter.

As an author who writes about smallscale homesteading and a homesteader herself, she also relishes the opportunity the tailgates provide to talk with the farmers directly and to connect with her food community.

Knowing that tailgates close in late December, she encourages shoppers to ask the farmers where their items might be found come January — including restaurant menus — to keep a connection year-round. “We’re fortunate to have a number of outlets in the area that continue carrying leafy greens grown in greenhouses, garlic and root vegetables; they also offer local meats, breads, baked goods, cheeses and honey all winter,” English says.

That’s not the only positive aspect English sees in this less-abundant local-food season. “The short days and long nights of cold-weather months are ideal times for reading up on food preservation,” she says.

“That way, once the markets open in April, you’ll be primed and ready to preserve that harvest as well.”

Reading is how English became comfortable with preservation, which she acknowledges can be a fearful process for some. “When learning any new food technique, I’ve read all I can about the process, then apprenticed with or taken a class taught by a professional,” she says. “I’ve found this process simultaneously removes the mystique and allays fears and, typically, it’s an awful lot of fun.”

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We’ve added a few of English’s recipes; one for preserving apples, and two using already preserved fruit. All three are good for bringing to holiday parties, and the apple butter, jarred nicely with a pretty label, makes a great gift.

The four books of English’s homemade living series, including Canning & Preserving with Ashley English: All You Need to Know to Make Jams, Jellies, Pickles, Chutneys & More, can be found wherever Lark Books are sold. English regularly shares homemade living tips and recipes via her blog, small-measure.blogspot.com.

Find a list of holiday tailgate market dates, hours and locations at ASAP’s new community website FromHere. org. There, you can also learn more about the Get Local campaign, which spotlights local ingredients yearround. Also, search ASAP’s online Local Food Guide for more information about tailgates and fall and winter local foods, as well as groceries and farm stands open every season.

Maggie Cramer is the communications coordinator at Appalachian Sustainable Agriculture Project (asapconnections.org). Contact her at maggie@asapconnections.org.

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 47

good tidings we bring — in a jar. Photo by Lynne Harty

spicEd applE BUttEr

deck the (holiday) balls Photo by Lynne Harty

yield: 4 half-pints. ingredients: 5 lbs cooking apples, 2 cups water, 2 cups granulated sugar, 2 tsp cinnamon, ½ tsp ground cloves, ½ tsp nutmeg, ½ tsp ground ginger Method: peel, core and chop apples. place in a large stainless-steel pot along with water. Simmer over low heat for 45 minutes. stir occasionally to prevent sticking and add water in ¼ cup increments if sticking occurs. remove from heat.

Meanwhile, sterilize four half-pint Mason jars, lids and screw rings. fill a canner or large stockpot with water and set over medium-high heat. Bring just to the boiling point. place lids in a small saucepan, fill with water, bring to a boil, turn off heat, remove from stovetop and set aside.

Next, either press the cooked apple mixture through a food mill or fine-meshed sieve, puree in a food processor once slightly cooled or use an immersion blender and puree the mixture in the pot.

Once pureed, return to pot, add sugar and spices, and bring to a gentle boil over medium heat. reduce heat to low and simmer for 25-30 minutes. stir often to prevent mixture from sticking. remove from heat.

holiday roUnds Local honey gets the spotlight in ASAP’s Get Local campaign this January. Try using local honey in this recipe (especially with the recent news that some grocery store honey sometimes contains little in the way of actual honey). Find yours at area tailgate markets and at grocery stores that sell local foods.

Visit FromHere.org to look for sources. yield: Approximately 3-4 dozen. ingredients: 1 cup walnuts, 1 cup pecans, ½ cup almonds, 1 cup dried apricots, chopped, ¼ cup butter, ¼ cup honey, ½ cup dried cranberries, 2 tbsp fresh rosemary, finely chopped , 1 tsp nutmeg (freshly grated, if possible), 1 tsp sea salt, black pepper, to taste.

process for 10 minutes in a boiling-water bath. Remember to adjust for altitude.

Method: pulse the nuts and apricots in blender until the pieces form crumbles (don’t overdo it, or you’ll end up with a nut and fruit butter). Melt the butter in stainless-steel saucepan over medium heat. add the nut mixture. stir for about a minute, then add the honey. Cook for 3-4 minutes, stirring frequently. add cranberries, rosemary, nutmeg, salt and pepper. Cook 2-3 minutes, stirring frequently, until mixture is sticky. remove from heat and let cool for 5-10 minutes. form mixture into small balls, a little under 1-inch in diameter. let them come to room temperature, and enjoy.

Reprinted with permission from Homemade Living: Canning & Preserving © 2010

by Ashley English, Lark Crafts, an imprint of Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.

Reprinted with permission from Homemade Living: Keeping Bees © 2011

by Ashley English, Lark Crafts, an imprint of Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.

ladle apple butter into hot jars. leave ¼-inch headspace. Use a nonmetallic spatula to remove any trapped air bubbles and wipe rims clean with a damp cloth. place on lids and screw bands, tightening only until fingertip-tight.

48 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

ALL LOCALLY GROWN!

Christmas Trees $19.99 and Up

Poinsettias Wreaths Garland Open Black Friday & Saturday

spreading good cheer Photo by Lynne Harty

chEVrE, cranBErry and pEcan sprEad This recipe uses dried fruits, fresh herbs and local maple syrup, which is available from Maple Creek Farm in Yancey County. yield: 1 ½ lbs. ingredients: 1 lb chevre , 3 ounces Tawny port, 4 tbsp maple syrup, divided into two portions, ½ cup pecan halves, ½ cup dried cranberries, pinch of sea salt, ¼ tsp cracked black pepper, 2 tbsp butter, 1 tsp fresh rosemary, chopped Method: Bring the cheese to room temperature. In a small saucepan over medium heat, reduce the port to about half its volume. stir in two tablespoons maple syrup. remove from heat and allow to cool for five minutes. In a medium-sized mixing bowl, combine the cooled port mixture and chevre. spread the chevre blend evenly in a shallow serving dish. Over low heat, melt the butter, and then mix in the pecan halves. add the remaining two tablespoons maple syrup, salt and pepper and cook for about two minutes, stirring frequently. add the cranberries and cook for another minute. let the cranberry-pecan mixture cool for five minutes. top the cheese evenly with the cranberry-nut mixture.

Reprinted with permission from Homemade Living: Home Dairy © 2011

by Ashley English, Lark Crafts, an imprint of Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 49

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haVE a VEry local holiday and a hEalthy nEw yEar Has your little foodie been particularly nice this year? Do you have family members who squeal over gifts of locally made jams and pickles?

Asheville’s gotten on the gift train in a very real way this year, making it easier for you to have a very local holiday.

deck the halls with bowls of jelly Blue ridge food Ventures rings in the season with a jam-packed (pun intended) holiday market on Wednesday, Dec. 7. Hours for the market are limited, so plan accordingly.

Shop from 9 a.m. until 1 p.m. and again at 4 until 7 p.m. at 1461 Sand Hill Road on the A-B Tech Enka campus.

The market will feature edible items, all handmade in the kitchens of Blue Ridge Food Ventures or from companies that got started there. Buy individual products a la carte, or check out

50 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

BRFV’s pre-packaged gift boxes (more about that below).

Among the gift-sized edibles, you’ll find Jack’s Nut Butter, a raw and sprouted product made with coconut oil, ghee nuts and local honey. Bamboo Ladies will feature crisp bamboo pickles and Imladris Farms will be there with locally grown-berry jams and apple butter. UliMana will offer raw, organic chocolates, Lusty Monk will have so-spicy-they’re-therapeutic mustards and Dolci di Maria will showcase Italian gluten-free desserts.

Also on the menu: GalloLea pizza kits, Smokin’ J’s hot sauces (made with locally grown chillies) and Pig Polish barbecue sauce.

The prepackaged holiday gift boxes are a brilliant representation of Asheville’s food scene. They’re ready to wrap and already filled with an assortment of handcrafted gourmet

special delivery: A big ol’ basket of veggies may not be the ideal gift for most kids on your list, but plenty of adults we know would love a CSA subscription for Christmas.

Photo courtesy of ASAP items from local food entrepreneurs, priced from $34.99 to $49.99. For a super-deluxe food package, we suggest calling your loved one’s favorite independent restaurant and requesting a gift certificate to add to the box later.

The basic gift box, “Fine Flavors from Blue Ridge Food Ventures,” is stuffed with local goods like Lusty Monk mustards and Imladris Farm jams. We particularly like the “Hot Box,” which features locally made fiery hot sauces, salsas, a garlicky seasoning blend

Speaking of Winter Sun Farms, do you have a busy home-cook on your hands? This CSA’s members receive produce pre-washed, chopped, sliced, diced and frozen, for easy use in standard recipes. BRFV staff take the fresh produce in summer and gently prep, package and freeze for you to use in winter, when fresh local veggies are in short supply.

Gift recipients can enjoy blueberries, raspberries and blackberries in their oatmeal, in a smoothie or baked into a pie. Vegetables such as beans, squash and peppers are perfect for soups and stews. All that’s necessary is the addition of a few ingredients and, in short order, dinner is ready.

Pickups start Wednesday, Dec. 7, at the Blue Ridge Food Ventures Holiday Market and take place monthly through March. The total cost for a share in Winter Sun Farms is $125 for four monthly pickups at Blue Ridge Food Ventures on the A-B Tech Enka campus, or $135 for pickups in downtown Asheville at The Fresh Quarter in the Grove Arcade, Black Mountain at the Merry Wine Market or Flat Rock at Hand-in-Hand Gallery.

For information on Winter Sun Farms, including how to sign up, a list of the program’s local farm partners and recipes using the produce, visit wintersunfarmsnc.com.

Market-fresh gift ideas and chocolate truffles with a hint of cayenne pepper.

The “Sweet ’n’ Spicy Box” includes Cajun seasonings, Fire From the Mountain salsa, plus chocolate truffles and blueberry jam to balance out the heat. For those who like it mellow, there’s the aptly named “Not Hot Box,” with fruit jam, a tropical nut butter, and a whole wheat pizza kit. Glutenfree products are also available.

Can’t make it to the holiday market?

Orders for gift boxes can be shipped to anywhere in the U.S. and can also be placed online at blueridgefoodventures.org or by calling 348-0130.

think outside the gift box Searching for a meaningful gift for a food lover that loves to putter in the kitchen? Try the gift of a CSA subscription, and the giftee will thank you all year. That’s because they’ll get to open their gift more than once — every week during the entire growing season, to be exact. What’s a CSA? A Community Supported Agriculture customer gets a “subscription” to a farm, purchasing a year’s harvest of the farm’s goods. Each week, your

Box of pain: “The Hot Box” from BRFV is filled with an assortment of fiery hot sauces, including a ghost chili hot sauce, which any true heat lover knows is the real deal. Photo by Jennifer Callahan Photography loved one will receive a share of what’s in season. They’ll get a surprise of farm-fresh produce, and sometimes meat, dairy or flowers.

CSAs are great for both the farmer, who knows he or she will have customers’ support throughout the season, and the members, who get a direct connection to their farm. CSA memebers see the effect of the season and the weather on the farm they pick, get to try a wide variety of vegetables and receive a regular supply of the freshest food.

What’s more, you’ll get to support area farmers and our local economy. With the exception of winter sun farms, subscriptions start next spring. Find a full list of CSAs in our immediate region courtesy of Appalachian Sustainable Agriculture Project at avl. mx/proq.

The Montford Farmers Market (in the parking lot of the Asheville Chamber of Commerce) is the site of the Ninth Annual Holiday Bazaar, Dec. 3, 10, and 17 from 11 a.m. until 3 p.m. Expect local dancers, a capella singers and plenty of gifts and holiday decorations to choose from. You’ll find breads, savory and sweet treats, honey, jellies, jams, molasses, cheese, meats and Christmas trees and wreaths. You’ll also find potted, forced bulbs, ready to bloom indoors in winter, soaps and beauty products, pottery, clothing and other items handmade by regional artisans.

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Other tailgate markets are getting into the holiday spirit. For a list of what’s open, visit ASAP’s new site, fromhere. org. X Blue Ridge Food Ventures is an initiative of AdvantageWest, a nonprofit, public-private economic development partnership serving the 23 westernmost counties of North Carolina. Other jobcreation programs include advanced manufacturing, entrepreneurial development, the green economy and the WNC Film Commission. For more information, visit advantagewest.com.

Proceeds Benefit: Sponsored by:

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 51

PICTURE THE HOLIDAYS SEE mORE gREAT ART AT mOUnTAInX.COm/gIfTSOfTHESEASOn

AbOvE bY jASmInE jOOf

AbOvE bY ASHAnTI CObb

bELOw bY ELLA DOE

52 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

bELOw bY IvAH TYSOn

holidaycalendar Arts/Crafts Arts2People Holiday Market • Through SA (12/24) - Arts2People holiday market will be held at 91 Biltmore Ave. Info: www.arts2people. org.

ArtSpace Charter School Market • SA (12/10), 11am-4pm - The ArtSpace Charter School market will feature pottery, jewelry, textiles and more. Held at 2030 US Highway 70, Swannanoa. Info: www.artspacecharter.org or 298-2787.

Asheville Art Museum Located on Pack Square in downtown Asheville. Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am5pm and Sun., 1-5pm. Admission: $8/$7 students and seniors/Free for kids under 4. Free first Wednesdays from 3-5pm. Info: www.ashevilleart. org or 253-3227.

• Through SU (12/3) - A holiday market will be held during regular museum hours. Closed on Thanksgiving.

Asheville City Holiday Market • SATURDAYS through (12/17), 10am-1pm - Asheville City Holiday Market, 161 S. Charlotte St. Info: www.asapconnections.org.

Boone Handmade Market • SU (12/4), 1-5pm - The Boone Handmade Market will feature photography, knit-wear, woodwork and more. Held at the Turchin Center for the Visual Arts, 423 West King St., Boone. Info: www.tcva.org.

C.D. Owen Middle School • SA (12/10), 10am-4pm - A craft fair to benefit C.D. Owen Middle School will feature pottery, metalwork and woodwork, along with music, food and a raffle. Held at 730 Old US 70, Swannanoa. Info: 686-7917.

Edo Creek Fiber Studio Holiday Fine Art Sale • SA (12/3) & SU (12/4), 11am-5pm - The Holiday Fine Craft and Gift Sale will feature fiber arts, pottery, basketry and painting at Edo Creek Fiber Studio, 10 Garren Mountain Lane, Fairview. Info: 628-8618.

Flat Rock Christmas Market • SA (12/10), 2-5pm - The Flat Rock Tailgate Market will host a Christmas fair featuring Christmas trees, jams, wool items, meats and sweets for sale, along with free music. Held in front of Hubba Hubba Smokehouse, Highway 225 in downtown Flat Rock.

Info: 697-7719.

Francine Delany New School Craft Show • SA (12/3), 10am-3pm - Francine Delany New School for Children will host a craft show featuring jewelry, pottery, ornaments and more. Held at 119 Brevard Road. Info: www.fdnsc. net or 236-9441.

Gifts that Give Global Market Place • FR (12/2), 10am-1pm - A-B Tech’s Global Marketplace will feature locally produced and international fair trade products. Held in the lobby of the

Ferguson Auditorium on the Asheville campus. Info: http://avl.mx/74.

Grace Episcopal Holiday Craft Fair • SA (12/3), 9am-4pm - The Grace Episcopal Holiday Craft Fair will feature quilts, wood and paper craft, jewelry, botanical art and specialty food items. Held at Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. Info: 254-1086.

Haw Creek Forge Holiday Art • FR (12/9), 2-8pm - The Haw Creek Forge holiday art event will feature jewelry and garden sculptures. Held at Haw Creek Forge, 2000 Riverside Drive, #6. Info: www.hawcreekforge. com or 285-9785.

Haywood Studios Holiday Sale • TH (12/1), 9am-8pm & FR (12/2), 9am-3pm - The Haywood Studios holiday sale will feature work by Haywood Community College students. Held in the Student Center. Info: www.haywood.edu/events.

Haywood’s Historic Farmers Holiday Market • WEDNESDAYS & SATURDAYS through (12/17), 9am-noon Haywood’s Historic Farmers Holiday Market will feature vegetables, meats, eggs, soaps and candles. Held at 449A Pigeon St., Waynesville. Info: www.waynesvillefarmersmarket.com.

Holiday Home Show • SU (12/4), noon-4pm - A holiday home tour will feature jewelry, paintings and pottery. Light hors d’oeuvres and beverages will be served. Held at a private home, 177 Lakeshore Drive.

Park on Shorewood Drive. Info: lori@ crazygreenstudios.com.

Holidays Naturally Market in Hendersonville • FR (12/9), 1-4pm & SA (12/10), 10am-4pm - Holidays Naturally open house and holiday sale will feature amaryllis, sprays and wreaths.

Toasty Toes will have hand-crafted items for sale to benefit American service members. Held at Bullington Center, 95 Upper Red Oak Trail, Hendersonville. Info: 698-6104.

Holly Jolly Pottery Show • FR (12/2) through TH (12/30) - The Holly Jolly pottery show will feature teachers and students from BMCA Clay Studio. Held at Black Mountain Center for the Arts, 225 West State St. Info: www.blackmountainarts.org or 669-0930.

• FR (12/2), 6-8pm - Opening reception.

Loaves and Fishes Alternative Gift Fair • SU (12/4), 12:15-2pm - Loaves and Fishes Alternative Gift Fair will donate a portion of its proceeds to local nonprofits. Held at First Presbyterian Church, 40 Church St. Info: www.childrenfirstbc.org.

Madison County Arts Council Annual Holiday Sale • SA (12/10), 10am-5pm - The Madison County Arts Council Annual Holiday Sale will feature three floors of arts, crafts, botanicals, food

and more. Held at 90 S. Main St., Marshall. Info: www.madisoncountyarts.com or 649-1301.

Madison County Farmers and Artisans Holiday Market • SATURDAYS through (12/17), 10am-3pm - Madison County Farmers and Artisans Holiday Market will feature jewelry, candles, quilts, vegetables and more. Hot lunch available from Mackey Farm. Held at Fiddlestix, 37 Library St. Mars Hill.

Info: www.marshillmarket.org.

Mimi Strang Studio Collective Holiday Art Sale • SA (12/10) & SU (12/11), 11am6pm - The Mimi Strang Studio Collective Holiday Art Sale will feature works by Simone Wilson, Lou Anne Jordan, Stacey Budge-Kamison and others. Held at 15A Domino Lane.

Info: www.facebook.com/TheMimiStr angStudioCollective.

Montford Farmers Market Holiday Bazaar • SATURDAYS (12/3) through (12/17), 11am-3pm - The Montford Farmers Market Holiday Bazaar will feature Christmas trees, dancing, singing and gifts. Held in the parking lot of the Asheville Chamber of Commerce, 36 Montford Ave. Info: www.asapconnections.org.

Riceville Holiday Market • SA (12/3), 10am-4pm - The Riceville Holiday Market will feature jewelry, chocolate, local honey, woodwork and more. Free cider and door prizes. Held at Riceville Community Center, 2251 Riceville Road. Info: www.alpacaswnc.com.

Southern Highland Craft Guild Holiday Sale • SA (12/3) & SA (12/10) - A holiday art sale will feature items by the Southern Highland Craft Guild. Held at the Folk Art Center, MP 382 on the Blue Ridge Parkway. Info: www. craftguild.org or 298-7928.

Sylva Arts and Crafts Festival • SA (12/10), 10am-3pm - An arts and crafts festival, featuring artists, crafters and home-based businesses, will be held at the National Guard Armory, 611 Webster Road.

Info: davis.sharon@morrisbb.net or 226-0045.

Teacher and Student Pottery Market • FR (12/2), 6-8pm - Black Mountain Center for the Arts’ Clay Studio Teacher and Student Exhibit and Pottery Market will feature works for sale, along with live music and refreshments. Exhibit continues through Jan. Held during Holly Jolly at Black Mountain Center for the Arts, 225 W. State St. Info: www.blackmountainarts.org or 669-0930.

The Big Crafty • SU (12/4), noon-6pm - The Big Crafty will feature 90 juried artisans and indie crafters. Beer and sweets will be available. Live DJ. Held at Pack Place, 2 South Pack Square. Info: www.thebigcrafty.com.

Weaverville Holiday Market Locally grown, raised, and handmade market

EvEry WEdnEsday 2 pm - 6 pm novEmbEr 30 th - dEcEmbEr 21 st Find us inside the warm and cozy Weaverville Community Center overlooking Lake Louise

visit us for details at www.weavervilletailgate.org

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 53

holidaycontinued Transylvania Community Arts Council Located at 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard.

Hours: Mon.-Fri., 10am-4pm. Info: www.artsofbrevard.org or 884-2787.

• Through FR (12/16) - Santa’s Palette holiday show and sale.

Transylvania Tailgate Holiday Market • SA (12/3), 8am-noon - Featuring special “holiday offerings.” Held at 190 E. Main St., Brevard. Info: www.buyappalachian.org.

UNCA Holiday Art and Ceramic Sale • FR (12/2), 4-7pm & SA (12/3), 10am-2pm - UNCA’s annual holiday art and ceramics sale will feature work by UNCA students. Held in the S. Tucker Cooke Gallery. Info: art.unca.edu or 251-6559.

Weaverville Tailgate Holiday Market • WEDNESDAYS through (12/21), 26pm - The Weaverville Tailgate Holiday Market will feature artisans, meats and cheeses. Held inside the Weaverville Community Center, Lake Louise Drive.

Info: www.weavervilletailgate.org.

White Horse Holiday Farmers Market • WEDNESDAYS through (12/28), 3-6pm - The White Horse Holiday Farmers Market will feature baked goods, jewelry, meats, cheeses and vegetables. Held at White Horse Black Mountain, 105C Montreat Road. Info: www.whitehorseblackmountain.com.

MORE ART/CRAFT FAIRS EVENTS ONLINE

Check out the Art/Craft Fairs Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after December 8.

Holiday Happenings A Carolina Christmas • FR (12/9), 7:30pm & SA (12/10), 3pm - The Hendersonville Symphony Orchestra presents “A Carolina Christmas.” Held at Blue Ridge Community College’s Blue Ridge Conference Hall. $30/$5 students. Info: www.hendersonvillesymphony.org or 697-5884.

A Christmas Carol • Through SU (12/4) - The Absolute Theatre Company presents A Christmas Carol at the Hendersonville Christian School, 708 Old Spartanburg Road. $12. See website for full schedule: www.absolutetheatre.org.

A “Creepy” Christmas Carol • TH (12/8) through FR (12/23) - A “creepy” version of A Christmas Carol will be performed by Montford Park Players at the Asheville Masonic Temple, 80 Broadway St. Pay-whatwe’re-worth nights Dec. 8 and Dec. 15. See website for complete schedule. $12/$10 students/$6 under 18. Info: www.montfordparkplayers.org or 254-5146.

A Swannanoa Solstice • SU (12/18), 2 & 7pm - A Swannanoa Solstice will feature musicians Al Petteway, Amy White and Robin Bullock, along with storytellers and

dancers. Held at the Diana Wortham Theatre, 2 South Pack Square. $35/$30 student/$12 children. Info: www.dwtheatre.com or 257-4530.

A Very Merry Christmas • FR (12/2) through TH (12/22) - Flat Rock Playhouse’s YouTheatre presents A Very Merry Christmas, its annual Christmas tour. See website for times, locations and dates. Info: www.flatrockplayhouse.org/education.

AnTHM Gallery Located at 110.5 W. State St. in downtown Black Mountain. Info: www. anthmgallery.com.

• MO (12/12) through SA (12/24) - 20 percent off the work of a different artist each day.

Asheville Buncombe Youth Orchestra Holiday Concert • SA (12/3), 7:30pm - The Asheville Buncombe Youth Orchestra will perform selections from The Nutcracker with dancers from the Asheville Ballet.

Held at the Lelia Patterson Center, 1111 Howard Gap Road, Fletcher. $5/under 12 free. Info: www.ashevillesymphony. org.

Asheville Choral Society • FR (12/2), 7:30pm & SA (12/3), 4pm - The Asheville Choral Society will perform “Winterfest: Songs for the Season” at Arden Presbyterian Church, 2215 Hendersonville Road. $20/$10 students. Info: www.ashevillechoralsociety.org or 232-2060.

Asheville Community Theatre Located at 35 E. Walnut St. Tickets and info: www.ashevilletheatre.org or 254-1320.

• FRIDAYS through SUNDAYS until (12/4) - Dashing Through the Snow.

Bernstein Family Christmas Spectacular • THURSDAYS through SATURDAYS until (12/17), 7:30pm - The Bernstein Family Christmas Spectacular will ask the question “Is Santa actually a Communist?” Held at The Magnetic Field, 372 Depot St. Additional performances: Mon.-Wed., Dec. 19-21. $14/$12. Info: www.themagneticfield. com or 668-2154.

Black Mountain Christmas Parade • SA (12/3), 4pm - The Black Mountain Christmas Parade will depart from the Black Mountain Chamber of Commerce, 201 E. State St. A celebration at Lake Tomahawk will follow. Info: www.exploreblackmountain.com or 669-2300.

Black Mountain Youth Chorale Holiday Concert • SU (12/11), 3pm - The Black Mountain Youth Chorale, made up of students grades 4-8, will present its holiday concert at the Black Mountain Center for the Arts, 225 W. State St. $15-$5 suggested donation. Info: 669-0930.

Blue Ridge Community College Holiday Market • FR (12/2), noon-6pm & SA (12/3), 10am-6pm - A holiday market, featuring gifts from local businesses, will be held at Blue Ridge Community

College’s Conference Hall. Info: 6944747.

Blue Ridge Ringers • SA (12/3), 2pm - The Blue Ridge Ringers will perform at the Henderson County Library, 301 N Washington St., Hendersonville. Info: blueridgeringers@ gmail.com or 692-4910.

Brasstown Ringers Handbell Concert • SU (12/11), 4-5pm - Brasstown Ringers presents Christmas Bells at the First Christian Church, 470 Enka Lake Road, Chandler. Free, but donations accepted. Info: www.mapaa.org or 837-8822.

Breakfast With Santa • SA (12/3), 8:30-10:30am - A pancake breakfast with Santa will feature crafts for children. Photos with Santa available. Held at the Fairview Community Center, 1357 Charlotte Highway. $3/under 12 free. Info: www. fairviewcommunitycenter.blogspot. com.

Brevard Festival of Trees • Through SU (12/4) - The Brevard Festival of Trees, featuring thirty trees at the historic Silvermont Mansion, 364 E. Main St., will benefit the Children’s Center of Transylvania County. $3/ under 12 free. Info: 885-7286.

Brother Wolf Animal Rescue A no-kill organization. Info: www.bwar. org or 505-3440.

• SU (12/18), noon-4pm - A holiday open house will feature refreshments, activities for kids and gifts for pets and people. Visit www.bwar.org/donate for a list of items to donate.

Caribbean Christmas Exhibit • TH (12/1) through TU (1/31) - Caribbean Christmas, travel photography by Sara Shea, will be on display at Havana Restaurant, 1 Battle Square.

Info: www.havanaasheville.com or 252-1611.

• FR (12/9), 5-10pm - An opening reception will feature Latin music, sangria and Spanish hors d’oeuvres.

Carolina Christmas Mountain Spectacular • FR (12/2) through SU (12/4), 7pm - A broadway-style production will be performed at Biltmore Baptist Church, 35 Clayton Road, Arden. $20 gold circle seating/$10 general admission.

Info: www.biltmorebaptist.org/cmcs.

Carolina Horse and Carriage Tours • WEEKENDS through (12/24) - Horse and carriage tours will depart from the Hendersonville Visitors Information Center, 201 S. Main St. $25 for two people/$5 additional adults/$3 children under 12/under 4 free. Info: 209-1099.

Chamber Open House with Santa • SA (12/3), noon-3pm - Meet Santa and Mrs. Claus at the Black Mountain Chamber of Commerce, 201 East State St. Info: 669-2300.

Christmas at Connemara • SA (12/10), 11am-4pm - Christmas at Connemara will feature traditional decorations, music, hot cider and cookies. Held at the Carl Sandburg Home

54 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

National Historic Site, 81 Carl Sandburg Lane, Flat Rock. Info: 693-4178.

Christmas Banquet and Silent Auction • TU (12/6), 5-7pm - A Christmas banquet and silent auction will be held at the Black Mountain Chamber of Commerce, 201 East State St. $20.

Info: www.blackmountain.org or 6692300.

Christmas Festival at Historic Johnson Farm • SA (12/3), 11am-4pm - The Christmas Festival at Historic Johnson Farm will feature holiday music, cookies, cider and wagon rides. Bring a camera for photos with an antique sleigh. $5/$3 children. Info: 891-6585.

Christmas in Appalachia • SA (12/3), 7pm - Christmas in Appalachia, a fundraising concert for Shindig on the Green, will feature The Cockman Family, AppalachiaSong, clogging and buck dancing demos.

Held at the Upper Anderson Auditorium at Montreat Conference Center, 401 Assembly Drive. $20/$10 under 12.

Info: info@folkheritage.org or 6858313.

Christmas Pageant • FR (12/2) & SA (12/3), 6:30pm - The Madison County Christmas Pageant will be held on the Madison County Courthouse lawn in downtown Marshall. Free, but donations appreciated. Info: 680-9031.

Creative Technology & Arts Center Located at Odyssey Community School, 90 Zillicoa St. Info: www. ctacenter.org.

• WEDNESDAYS through (12/7), 4-5:30pm - Holiday gift making workshop.

Deck the Trees • TH (12/1) through MO (1/2) - “Deck the Trees” will feature Christmas trees decorated by local businesses and nonprofits. Trees will be on display at The Monte Vista Hotel, 308 W. State St., Black Mountain. Info: www.themontevistahotel.net, www.exploreblackmountain.com or 669-2300.

Festival Of Light • SU (12/4), 7pm - An interfaith winter/holiday celebration will feature Shaikh Imam Yahya, a classically trained Qu’ranic reciter from the Muslim American Society. Held in Warren Wilson College’s Upper Fellowship Hall.

Info: spirituallife@warren-wilson.edu.

Festival of Lights • TH (12/1) through SU (12/18), 69pm - The Festival of Lights will feature 50 animated and stationary light displays. A walking preview will be held on Dec. 1, 6-9pm. $5/$3 for walking tour. $15 per car for driving tour. 20 percent of proceeds benefit Buncombe County Special Olympics. Held at Lake Julian Park, 406 Overlook Extension, Arden.

Info: david.blynt@buncombecounty.org or 684-0376.

Flat Rock Playhouse The State Theater of North Carolina is on Highway 225, three miles south of

Hendersonville. Info: www.flatrockplayhouse.org or 693-0731.

• Through TH (12/22) - A holiday edition of Plaid Tidings. See website for full schedule.

• MO (12/5) through TH (12/22) - Home for the Holidays. $34. See website for full schedule.

Fletcher Christmas Parade • SA (12/10), 10:30am - The Town of Fletcher Christmas Parade will feature floats, music and Santa. Held on Highway 25, between Old Airport Road and Town Hall. Info: www.fletcherparks.org or 687-0751.

Fletcher Tree Lighting and Festival of Carols • FR (12/2), 5:30pm - Fletcher Tree Lighting and Festival of Carols will feature caroling and Santa. Bring a nonperishable food item. Held at Fletcher Community Park, 85 Howard Gap Road. Info: 687-0751.

Gingerbread Contest Display • Through SU (1/1) - The winners of the National Gingerbread House Competition will be on display at at the Grove Park Inn Resort and Spa, 290 Macon Ave. Guided tours will be offered Wed. through Sun. at 9am and 3pm through Jan. 1. Registration required for tour. Info: www.groveparkinn.com or 800-438-5800.

Hands On! This children’s museum is located at 318 North Main St., Hendersonville.

Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am-5pm.

Admission is $5, with discounts available on certain days. Info: www.handsonwnc.org or 697-8333.

• TH (12/22) & FR (12/23), 10am5pm - Make a Christmas tree ornament. $5 for supplies.

• TH (12/15), 2-4:30pm - Learn about dreidels and traditional Jewish games for Hannukkah. Free with admission or membership.

Hendersonville Christmas Parade • SA (12/3), 11am - The Hendersonville Christmas Parade will be held on Main Street. Info: 692-4179.

Hendersonville Community Band Christmas Concert • SU (12/4), 3pm - The Hendersonville Community Band Christmas Concert will be held in the Blue Ridge Community College’s Conference Hall. $10/children free. Info: 696-2118.

Hendersonville Visitors Center Holiday Open House • FR (12/2), 5-9pm - The Hendersonville Visitors Center Holiday Open House will feature a variety of holiday treats. Held at 201 South Main St. Info: 693-9708.

Hendersonville Youth Orchestra Winter Concert • SU (12/11), 4pm - The Hendersonville Symphony Youth Orchestra winter concert will be held at Blue Ridge Community College’s Bo Thomas Auditorium. $5. Info: www. hendersonvillesymphony.org or 6975884.

Hiking and Holiday Shopping

• TU (12/6), 8:30am - A guided hike of the Mingus Creek Trail will be followed by a trip to the Oconaluftee Visitor Center for holiday shopping. $25 donation. Departs from Asheville and Maggie Valley. Call for exact location. Info: grtsmoky@bellsouth.net or 452-0720.

Holiday Cookie and Bake Sale • SA (12/3), 10am-1pm - A cookie and bake sale will feature a “cookie labyrinth” and new and used books for purchase. Held at First Congregational Church, 1735 5th Ave. W., Hendersonville. Info: fccucc2@ bellsouth.net or 692-8630.

Holiday Home Tour • SA (12/10) - A tour of decorated homes in Transylvania County. Info and locations: 884-2787.

Holiday LaZoom Tour • Through SA (12/31) - LaZoom will host a new holiday tour featuring a snowman, turkey and “Asheville fruit cake.” See website for dates. Departs from French Broad Food Co-op, 90 Biltmore Ave. $23/$15 ages 13-17/$12 ages 5-12. Info: www.lazoomtours. com or 225-6932.

Holiday Music in Hendersonville • FR (12/16) & SA (12/17), 1-5pm - Local schools and churches will perform holiday music at Hendersonville’s Historic Courthouse on Main Street.

Info: 233-3216.

Holiday Origami Party for Kids • SA (12/10), 1-3pm - A holiday origami party for kids will be held at North Asheville Library, 1030 Merrimon Ave. Info: 250-4752.

Holiday Ornament Workshop for Kids • SA (12/3), 11am-noon - A holiday ornament workshop for kids will be held at Leicester Library, 1561 Alexander Road. Info: 250-6480.

Holiday Show • WE (12/21) & TH (12/22), 7pm - A holiday theater performance will feature Carol Anderson and Jim Shores. Held at the Black Mountain Center for the Arts, 225 W. State St. $15. Info: www. blackmountainarts.org or 669-0930.

Holiday Stories and Songs • SA (12/3), 3-5pm - A variety of storytellers will present holiday stories and songs. Held at Fletcher Feed and Seed, 3715 Hendersonville Road. Donations encouraged. Info: 329-8112.

Holiday Wine, Cheese and Champagne Tasting • TH (12/22), 6pm - A holiday wine, cheese and champagne tasting will be held at Appalachain Vintner, 2-B Huntsman Place. Info: www.appalachianvintner.com or 505-7500.

Holly Jolly Parade • FR (12/2), 5-9pm - A “Holly Jolly” parade will feature Santa and extended downtown business hours. Parade starts at 6pm at Cherry Street and ends at Depot Avenue, Black Mountain. Info: info@tlrcs.com or 239-0270.

Lighting of the Green • FR (12/9) through TH (12/22), 69pm - The Lighting of the Green will

holidaycontinued feature energy-efficient bulbs on historic homes on the A-B Tech campus.

Fernihurst Mansion will be open for tours and entertainment on Dec. 9, 13, 16 and 20. Info: http://avl.mx/71.

Melodies on Main • TH (12/1), 5:30-7pm - Melodies on Main will feature music by Patrick Young, members of the McDowell High Band and Ric Luther. Free pictures with Santa. Held on the courthouse lawn on Main Street. in downtown Marion.

Info: www.hometownmarion.com or 652-2215.

Montford Tour of Homes • SA (12/10), 1-5pm - A tour of decorated homes in Montford will feature Shakespearian actors and homemade baked goods. Tickets and info available at the Visitors Center Gift Shop, 36 Montford Ave. Info: www.montfordtour. com.

Music at Mars Hill College Info: 689-1239 or www.mhc.edu.

• FR (12/2), 7:30pm - The Mars Hill College Christmas concert will feature the college wind symphony, choir and chamber singers. Held in Moore Auditorium. Free.

NC Stage Company Asheville’s professional resident theater company, performing at 15 Stage Lane in downtown Asheville (entrance off of Walnut Street, across from Zambra’s).

Info and tickets: 239-0263 or www. ncstage.org.

• WEDNESDAYS through SUNDAYS until (12/18), 7:30pm - The 12 Dates of Christmas, “a one-woman show about how much the holidays suck after your heart’s been crushed.” Recommended for mature audiences.

Olde Fashioned Hendersonville Christmas • FR (12/2), 5-9pm - An Olde Fashioned Hendersonville Christmas will feature entertainment, refreshments and free trolly and carriage rides. Held throughout downtown Hendersonville.

Info: 233-3216.

Reindeer Run • SU (12/4) - The Reindeer Run 5K and Rudolph Run 1 mile will be held at Fletcher Park, 85 Howard Gap Road.

See website for times and cost. Info: www.handsonwnc.org.

Santa On the Chimney • SA (12/3) & SA (12/10) 11am-2pm - “Santa On the Chimney” will feature holiday music, hot coco, guided hikes and activities for children. Held at Chimney Rock State Park, 431 Main St., Chimney Rock. Info: www.chimneyrockpark.com.

Santaland Diaries • WE (12/7), 7pm - Santaland Diaries, David Sedaris’ story of a disenchanted department store elf, will be performed at Upstairs Artspace, 49 S. Trade St., Tryon. $40 includes horsd’ouvres made from Amy Sedaris’ cookbook. Not recommended for children. Info: frontdesk@upstairsartspace. org or 859-2828.

Sierra Club Christmas Party

• WE (12/7), 7pm - Sierra Club Christmas party potluck. Held at the Unitarian Universalist Church, 1 Edwin Place. Info: www.wenoca.org.

Sleigh Bells Ring • FR (12/16), 2pm - Blissing, a local women’s a capella trio, will perform “Sleigh Bells Ring... Are You Listening.”

Held at Oportunity House, 1411 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville. $10.

Info: 692-0575.

Smith-McDowell House Museum Period rooms grace this antebellum house on the campus of A-B Tech Community College, 283 Victoria Road.

Info: education@wnchistory.org or 253-9231.

• Through WE (1/4) - The Carolina Christmas Celebration will feature fresh trees and seven decorated period rooms.

Stories to Help Us Through the Holidays • SU (12/11), 2:30pm - The Asheville Storytelling Circle will present “Stories to Help Us Through the Holidays,” a humorous look at holiday stress, in UNCA’s Reuter Center. $5. Info: 2990748.

The Nutcracker • TH (12/15) through FR (12/16) - The Ballet Conservatory of Asheville will present The Nutcracker at the Diana Wortham Theatre, 2 South Pack Square. See website for times. Info: www.dwtheatre.com or 257-4530.

The Nutcracker • FR (12/9) through SU (12/11) Asheville Ballet presents The Nutcracker at the Diana Wortham Theatre, 2 South Pack Square. See website for times.

Info: www.dwtheatre.com or 257-4530.

The Nutcracker and the Mouse King • FR (12/2) & SA (12/3), 7:30pm Asheville Contemporary Dance Theatre and New Studio of Dance will present The Nutcracker and the Mouse King.

Held at the Diana Wortham Theatre, 2 Pack Place. $25/$20 students and children. Info: www.acdt.org or 257-4530.

The Polar Express • SA (12/3), 11:45-noon - A reading of The Polar Express by a railroad conductor will follow the Hendersonville Christmas Parade at the historic train depot on Maple St. Info: 674-3067.

Tryon Christmas Stroll • FR (12/2), 5-8pm - Tryon Christmas stroll will feature Dance Dynamics, Community Chorus, Tryon First Baptist Bell Choir and more. Held throughout Trade Street. Info: 859-6236.

Twilight Tour • SA (12/3), 11am-5:30pm - The Twilight Tour will now be held during the day, featuring entertainment, horsedrawn carriages and Santa Claus. Held throughout downtown Brevard. Info: www.brevardnc.org or 884-3278.

UNCA Holiday Concert • SU (12/4), 4pm - UNCA’s holiday concert will feature performances by the percussion and wind ensembles, with a pre-show performance by the brass quintet. Held in Lipinsky

Auditorium. $5/students and children free. Info: music.unca.edu or 2516432.

Unity Center Events Located at 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Road, Mills River. Info: www.unitync. net, 684-3798 or 891-8700.

• SA (12/18), 12:45pm - Bring 6-8 servings of a main dish, salad or dessert for a Christmas potluck.

Vance Birthplace State Historic Site Located at 911 Reems Creek Road, Weaverville. Info: 645-6706.

• SA (12/3), 4-7pm - Enjoy a candlelight tour of a two-story reconstructed log house decorated in the style of the 1830’s.

Visions of Sugar Plums Self-Guided Tour • SA (12/10) through SU (12/11), noon-4pm - “Visions of Sugar Plums,” a self-guided tour of nine Black Mountain Bed and Breakfasts, will feature Christmas decorations and cookies. $15. Call for details: 669-2300.

Winter Crafts for Kids • SA (12/3), noon-2pm - Winter crafts for kids will be offered at the Fairview Library, 1 Taylor Road. Info: 250-6485.

Winter Solstice Hike • TH (12/22), 7-9pm - A winter solstice hike will include a guided, 1/4mile nighttime walk. Bring a flashlight and a warm drink to toast the solstice.

Departs from Hooker Falls parking lot on DuPont Road, Hendersonville. Info: 692-0385.

WNCA Lighting Tour • TU (12/6), 7-9pm - The Western North Carolina Alliance will host an evening lighting tour of Asheville. Departs from Pack’s Tavern, 20 South Spruce St. $10 donation. Info and registration: joy@wnca.org or 258-8737.

Writers’ Workshop Holiday Get Together • WE (12/21), 5:30-7:30pm - A get together of The Writers’ Workshop will feature hot cider, mulled wine and treats at 387 Beaucatcher Road. RSVP by Dec. 18. Info: writersw@gmail.com or 254-8111.

MORE HOLIdAy HAppENINgS ONLINE

Check out the Festivals & Gatherings Calendar online at www.mountainx. com/events for info on events happening after December 8.

Give Back Big Brothers Big Sisters of WNC Located at 50 S. French Broad Ave., Room 213, in the United Way building.

The organization matches children from single-parent homes with adult mentors. Info: www.bbbswnc.org or 253-1470.

• Big Brothers Big Sisters seeks adult mentors for bi-monthly outings. Activities are free or low-cost.

Volunteers are also needed to mentor 1 hr./wk. in schools and after-school programs.

• Big Brothers Big Sisters seeks volunteers ages 16 and older to mentor one hour per week in schools and after-school sites. Volunteers ages 18 and older needed to share outings in the community twice a month. Info session Dec. 7.

Call A Ride • Volunteers needed to drive seniors to doctor appointments as part of the Call A Ride program. Volunteers use their own vehicles and mileage reimbursement is available. Info: www.coabc.org or 277-8228.

Center for New Beginnings • The Center for New Beginnings seeks volunteers for community awareness and services for crime victims and survivors of traffic fatalities, suicides and other death-related incidents. Info: contact@centerfornb.org or 989-9306.

Children First/CIS Children First/CIS is a nonprofit advocating for children living in vulnerable conditions. Info: VolunteerC@childrenfirstbc.org or 768-2072.

• Through TU (5/1), 2:30-5:30pm - Volunteers needed at least one hour per week, Mon.-Thurs., to help K-5th graders with homework and activities.

Info: VolunteerC@childrenfirstbc.org or 768-2072.

Children’s Christmas Gifting Party • TU (12/6), 3:30-7pm - A children’s Christmas gifting party will allow children from the Boys and Girls Club of Henderson County to shop for items for their parents or caregivers. Held at First United Methodist Church, 204 6th Ave. W., Hendersonville. Info: debra@ hvlfumc.org or 693-4275.

Fabric Needed for Donated Quilts • St. Mark’s Lutheran Church seeks large pieces of fabric (82” x 64”) to make quilts for charity. Drop off at 10 N. Liberty St. Info: 263-0043.

Hands On Asheville-Buncombe Choose the volunteer opportunity that works for you. Youth are welcome on many projects with adult supervision.

Info: www.handsonasheville.org or call 2-1-1. Visit the website to sign up for a project.

• SA (12/3), 10:15-11:45amTeacher’s Pet: Volunteers will create supplemental educational materials to be used in and out of the classroom to help elementary students improve their reading skills. Make flashcards, games and more. Instruction and materials provided.

• SA (12/3), 1-3pm - Children ages 712 are invited to make holiday decorations for CarePartners Christmas tree.

• TUE (12/6) - 6-8pm - Cookie Night: Help bake cookies for hospice patients at CarePartners’ John Keever Solace Center. Supplies provided.

Helios Warriors Health Care Program for Veterans A nonprofit alternative therapy program for veterans. Info: info@helioswarriors.org, www.helioswarriors.org or 299-0776.

• THURSDAYS & SUNDAYS - Offering complementary/alternative therapies.

Needed: professional licensed/insured practitioners willing to offer a minimum of three hours per month of their service. Info: helioswarriors@gmail.com or 299-0776.

Holiday Cookie Party • FR (12/16), 6-8pm - Loving Food Resources will host a holiday cookie party to benefit community members in need. Bring 4 dozen homemade cookies to Kenilworth Presbyterian Church, 123 Kenilworth Road. Info: 273-2531.

Holiday Giving Tree at the Oakley Library • Through WE (12/16) - A holiday giving tree will provide books to children in need. Contact library to select a book for a child based on age, gender and interests. Held at the Oakley Library, 749 Fairview Road. Info: oakley. library@buncombecounty.org or 2504754.

Holiday Hero • Through FR (12/16) - Youth Villages will accept donations for Holiday Heroes, a program for abused and neglected children or those with mental health issues. Unwrapped gifts can be dropped off at Youth Villages, 38 Rosscraggon Road, Suite 38C by Dec. 16. Checks for $75 will be accepted through Dec. 12. Info: Stephanie.

Hoyle@YouthVillages.org or 704-3577943.

Housing Assistance • MO (12/5) - Volunteers needed for the Housing Assistance program. Call for location and time: www.housingassistance.com or 692-4744.

MANNA FoodBank Drive • Through WE (11/30) - High Vista Country Club, 88 Country Club Road in Mills River, will collect non-perishable canned goods for MANNA FoodBank.

Info: 891-1986 or natalie@highvistagolf.com.

Meals On Wheels • Through TH (12/15) - Meals On Wheels will collect shoe boxes filled will gifts for the elderly. Please wrap (but do not seal) packages and label male or female. Items must be dropped off at 146 Victoria Road by Dec. 15. Info: www.mowabc.org or 253-5286.

New Opportunities Thrift Store • The Opportunity House, 1411 Asheville Highway in Hendersonville, seeks donations for the New Opportunities Thrift Store. Volunteers also needed during store hours. Info: 692-0575.

Partners Unlimited • Partners Unlimited, a program for atrisk youth between the ages of 10 and 18, seeks volunteers for its fundraiser and program committee. Info: partnersunlimited@juno.com or 281-2800.

Pot Luck Parents • Pot Luck Parents seeks foster parents to form a support group. Date, time and location to be determined.

Info: leighlo@yahoo.com or 226-3876.

Smith-McDowell House Museum Period rooms grace this antebellum house on the campus of A-B Tech Community College, 283 Victoria Road.

Info: education@wnchistory.org or 253-9231.

• Through TH (1/5) - Volunteer tour guides needed, especially on weekends. Flexible hours. Training provided.

Info: wnchavolunteers@gmail.com or 253-5518.

Smoky Mountain Toy Run • SA (12/3), 1pm - The Smoky Mountain Toy Run will provide toys to Buncombe County children. The motorcycle ride will depart from Kearfott Plant, 2858 US Highway 70 W., Black Mountain. Bring a new toy priced $10$20. Info: www.smokymountaintoyrun. com.

Toys For Tots Dance • SA (12/3), 7pm - Bring an unwrapped toy for Southern Lights Square and Round Dance Club’s Toys For Tots dance. Advance dance starts at 6pm. Held at Whitmire Activity Center, 301 Lily Pond Road, Hendersonville. Info: 696-9198.

Transylvania Community Arts Council Located at 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard.

Hours: Mon.-Fri., 10am-4pm. Info: www.artsofbrevard.org or 884-2787.

• Through SA (12/31) - Volunteers needed for the “Take Art to Heart” program to share works of art with elementary school students. Info: tcarts@ comporium.net.

Volunteers for Family Therapy Study • Through FR (12/30) - Family therapist Vikki Stark seeks adults who experienced divorce as a child or teen for a clinical study. Info: ChildDivorceStudy@gmail.com.

Winter Coat Drive • MONDAYS through FRIDAYS, 8:30am-5pm - The Sheriff’s Office will collect coats, sweaters and winter items for local shelters. Collection boxes located at 202 Haywood St. and 20 Davidson Drive. Info: 250-4441.

YWCA MotherLove Giving Tree • Through FR (12/16) - The YWCA MotherLove Giving Tree will be on display at 185 S. French Broad Ave. The Giving Tree is made of stars bearing wishes from local teen mothers. The public is invited to the YWCA to provide gifts children. Info: 254-7206.

MORE VOLUNTEERINg EVENTS ONLINE

Check out the Volunteering Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after December 8.

CALENdAR dEAdLINE

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication.

Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext.

365

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 55

arts&entertainment “Tradition is always malleable”

Irish guitarist John Doyle writes his own history on solo album Shadow and Light

by Alli Marshall Traditional Irish songs often revolve around a few well-explored themes: family, drinking, love (lost and found, and of drinking), war and immigration. All of these can be found on Shadow and Light, the sophomore solo album by guitarist/producer John Doyle.

But here’s where Doyle’s album parts with tradition: Instead of recording a collection of jigs, reel and ballads culled from generations past, Doyle wrote 10 of the 11 tracks specifically for Shadow. “I think there’s always going to be some people who are very much traditionalists, and there are going to be some people who accept change,” says Doyle. “I think we need all of us: People who keep the tradition alive in the pure sense, and innovators to bring it forward.

Otherwise it’s a dead culture.”

Still, the songs aren’t immediately recognizable as new work. Doyle points out that his writing reflects his many years of work within Irish traditional sounds. “I’ve immersed myself so much in folk music these days that I dream it,” he says. In recent years, he’s been the music director for Joan Baez and has performed regularly with the likes of singer/songwriter Andy

info who:

John Doyle (with Casey Driessen and Todd Phillips)

where:

The Grey Eagle

when:

Sunday, Dec. 4 (8 p.m., $15 advance or $17 day of show. thegreyeagle. com)

Irvine, multi-instrumentalist John Williams, and fiddlers Karan Casey and Liz Carroll. With Carroll, he performed at the White House on Saint Patrick’s Day of 2009. With Casey, he recorded the 2010 collaborative album, Exiles Return. It was also with Casey, Williams and others that Doyle formed influential AmericanIrish band Solas in the ‘90s.

Doyle says that from all of these collaborators, he’s picked up many influences. In fact, the Irish-born musician writes rock and pop songs, but, “I have a hard time doing those songs in a concert setting because they don’t blend.”

Doyle’s introduction to Irish guitar (an instrument and style of which he’s now considered a master) was, surprisingly, not traditional music.

“I started guitar as a bet with a friend, who would pick up this song the first,” he says. “It was a Grateful Dead song.”

Outside influences are part of the convention of traditional music, says Doyle. Even in the late 1700s, Vivaldi was leaving a mark on the Irish sound. “Some people think that Turlough O’Carolan, who was a famous harp player, got too many influences from Italy,” Doyle laughs.

“Tradition is always malleable. As far as my writing is concerned, it comes from everywhere.”

For Shadow, his writing draws from a personal history. “Selkie” is based on a dream, informed by the Irish legend of the mythical seal people. “Clear The Way” is about the Royal Irish Volunteers who fought in the American Civil War. “The Arabic” takes its name from the ship on which Doyle’s great-grandfather sailed to New York in 1916.

“These are mainly songs about the American Irish,” says Doyle. One of his reasons for writing the album was “to get people thinking about their family. Everyone has a story. Every time I finish a gig, someone comes up to me about an immigrant’s story: Borrowing from the Irish songbook, John Doyle writes of their family story.” battles, struggles and voyages. He taps into his family history for inspiration, but the Immigration is, indeed, the story of genIrish-born musician says he’s also “trying to explain myself.” erations of Irish-Americans. But it’s also Doyle’s story: 20 years ago he, like his ancestors before him, immigrated to New York. “I’m between two worlds,” he says. “That’s why the immigrant story is an important part for me: I’m trying to explain myself. You’re a part of both worlds, and a part of neither.”

Doyle says that by leaving his native home, something was lost, but something was also gained. “When I go back home there’s a weight of history and a weight of ancestors,” he says.

“It’s hard to break free of that.” Starting over in a new country might be why he was able to take a chance on a career in music. James Joyce had to leave Ireland to make it as a writer, Doyle points out, as did Beckett.

56 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

“But I didn’t think of anything in that way,” says Doyle. “I just came over for a holiday. I had $300. And 20 years later I’m still here.”

It’s been two decades well-spent. Now based in WNC with his wife and daughter, Doyle continues to innovate Irish music as both a solo and collaborative artist. His Grey Eagle concert — an all-too-rare Asheville performance — will showcase just that, including guests like doublebassist Todd Phillips (a founding member of the original David Grisman Quintet and, with Doyle, a Joan Baez band member) and fiddler/ recent Asheville transplant Casey Driessen. X Alli Marshall can be reached at amarshall@ mountainx.com.

more

holiday songs old & new The Swannanoa Solstice is a tradition nine years in the making. The annual concert returns to the Diana Wortham Theatre with (according to press) “a wealth of storytellers, dancers and special guest musicians.”

But the heart of the event is acoustic trio Al Petteway, Amy White and Robin Bullock, who perform holiday songs “old and new, religious and secular, joyful and poignant, in a warm and intimate winter concert.”

This year’s showcase includes Appalachian storyteller and ballad singer Sheila Kay Adams, highland bagpipers Steve Agan and E.J. Jones, Cape Breton-style stepdancers The Twisty Cuffs and virtuoso fiddler and harpist Alex Reidinger. Doug Orr, founder of The Swannanoa Gathering, hosts.

The concert is held on Sunday, Dec. 18 at 2 and 7 p.m. Tickets are $35 for adults, $30 for students and $12 for children. dwtheatre.com. — A.M.

LEAF PILE REMOVAL 828-230-2180

www.ashevillelawnmowing.com Freedom Landscape Management, Inc. mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 57

arts X music

From Beirut, with love

The old-world indie-pop band talks new album and their soft spot for AVL

Sunday - Thursday 5 pm until Friday - Saturday 3 pm until

Classic & Contemporary Cocktails Sumptuous Small Plates Rooftop Seating SPECIALS

Sunday: $4 Champagne Monday: $4 Well Drinks Tuesday: $4 Well Drinks Wednesday: $6 Call Bourbon & Scotch Thursday: $5 Martinis

by Miles Britton Seems like Beirut might have a little crush on Asheville.

In fact, when the Brooklyn band had a day off between shows in Richmond and Atlanta a few weeks ago, the musicians chose to drive their tour bus a good hour out of the way to hang out here in the mountains with us.

And it turned out to be one of the most memorable stops of their tour (which went across North America, Europe and the late-night stages of Letterman and Fallon, mind you). The band checked out the Moog Factory, drank beers at the Thirsty Monk, ate dinner at Tupelo Honey and Chai Pani, and hung out late night at Broadway’s.

All that, and they just happened to run into Brian effing Eno. “It was incredible,” says Paul Collins, Beirut’s bass player. “We were invited [by the people at Moog Music] to see the 77 Million Paintings, an early preview of it. We didn’t know if Eno was going to be there — I kind of assumed he wasn’t — and then he popped out. He was like, ‘Hey, what’s going on everybody.’ And it was that moment where it’s like, ‘Holy shit, that’s really Brian Eno.’”

info who:

Beirut, with Perfume Genius

where: 29 Broadway Street Downtown Asheville, NC

ashevillesazerac.com

The Orange Peel

when:

Monday, Dec. 5 (8 p.m. $25/$28. theorangepeel.net)

58 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

a lot of eating and drinking: The band stopped here to hang, and checked out Moog Music, Thirsty Monk, Tupelo Honey and a few other choice spots.

“He was just so nice. We went up to talk to him after the show, and he actually said he knows Beirut, and he was a fan of our new single [the charming “East Harlem”]. He called up his daughters to say, ‘Hey, have you heard of this band Beirut?’ And they were like, ‘Of course, Dad!’ Which we thought was awesome,” he says, still sounding a bit in awe. “Yeah, that was the shit.”

And for Beirut, the Asheville randomness hardly stopped there. “[Accordion/piano player] Perrin [Cloutier] and I both days went to Early Girl,” Collins goes on. “I love that place. I love it so much. And actually, you know who else was eating there?

[Congresswoman] Gabrielle Giffords. That was, like, the start of my day. And then at the end of the day, we meet Brian Eno.” He laughs. “I’m just stopping through Asheville, but this is the sort of shit that happens here I guess.”

Aww, shucks. Now you’re just making us blush.

But enough about us. Let’s talk Beirut.

The orchestral pop band started out in 2006 as a bedroom recording project for Santa Fe teenager and multi-instrumentalist Zach Condon. Heavily influenced by Balkan folk music and French cabaret, Condon’s debut album, Gulag Orkestar, became an out-of-the-blue indie hit. Filled with gypsyinfused horns, waltzing accordions, strumming ukuleles and Condon’s gorgeous, fluttering croon, its sound conjured up all the mystery and romance of a rag-tag musical procession shambling down the cobble-stoned back streets of an old, European city.

For Beirut’s third and latest album, The Rip Tide, Condon decided to change things up. This time, instead of heading back to his usual Sante Fe to woodshed new songs, he pulled a Bon Iver and

headed north, alone. For six months, he holed himself away in a farmhouse in upstate New York, just him and his pet beagle Cousteau, writing some of the catchiest songs of his career. And when he returned to Brooklyn, he made another Beirut first by inviting the entire band in to the studio to record the tracks live.

“Zach comes back with these demos, and they’re amazing,” says Collins. “They sound like finished works, in a way. They could be. But when the band gets a hold of them — everybody really heavily digging into the songs — and once we start mixing them down and everything, you hear how, Ok, this really needed the band. That’s how [Zach] was imagining them.”

Relinquishing some of the control proved to be a smart move on Condon’s part. Whereas early albums were drowning in layers and layers of exotic instruments and lush, dense sounds, The Rip Tide feels almost airy. More honest, more natural.

For the first time, Beirut sounds like, well, a real band.

“It’s kind of an imperceptible thing probably to somebody who’s giving it a light listen,” says Collins. “But there’s just certain songs where it gels in this unique way. To where as, before, it was just Zach stacking things on top of one another. But now it’s really a band sound, much more like our live show than anything we’ve done before.”

And speaking of live show, what’s Condon and co. planning this time around for their trip to Asheville?

“A lot of eating and drinking, I assume,” Collins says, laughing.

Already thinking like a true local. X Miles Britton is an Asheville-based freelance writer.

arts X music/art

Too complex to be labeled just as a composer Looking at the influence of John Cage

by Kyle Sherard Lots of circles, a bunch of dots and lines running all over the place and a bit of jotted commentary can illuminate a composer’s aesthetic.

But can you hold an entire art exhibition for a music composer?

That depends on whether or not the composer was also a visual artist. Black Mountain College Museum and Arts Center’s current exhibition takes on the task in John Cage: A Circle of Influences. Curated and organized by Alice Sebrell and Bridget Elmer, the show coincided with this year’s ReViewing 3, a topical conference that focused on Cage and BMC. Known for his musical absurdities and minimalist compositions, some of Cage’s famed musical works included “prepared pianos,” “Suite for Toy Piano,” “27 Sounds Manufactured in a Kitchen” and the avant-garde bombshell that is “4’33”.”

Sebrell describes the avant-garde musician, Black Mountain College professor, printmaker, philosopher, educator, poet and mycologist as “far too complex to be solely labeled as a composer.” This exhibition contains bits and pieces from most of his undertakings. Photographs, prints, drawings, musical scores, notes, stones, feathers, brushes and edible paper among other items constitute a survey of Cage’s visual work, beginning with his time spent at Black Mountain College and extending through the early 1990s.

There are only relics from his BMC days in this show. The bulk of his work at the school dealt almost entirely with music composition and performance, famously culminating in the 1952 hybridized performance “Happening.”

Two photographs and a schedule for a 1948 performance of The Ruse of Medusa hang together.

The one-act comedy included Cage on piano, the William and Elaine de Kooning, M.C. Richards, Buckminster Fuller and Merce Cunningham, his lifelong partner, as “Jonas the Costly Mechanical Monkey.” While the exhibition provides us a comprehensive survey of Cage’s visual work, a few included personal effects really bring out his quirky, postmodern nature.

A quick, hand-written note proclaims pay-

info who: John Cage: A Circle of Influences

where:

Black Mountain College Museum + Arts Center, 56 Broadway. Music performance “Variations on the Long Note,” Saturday, Dec. 3, 8 p.m.

Featuring Jason Scott Furr, Ross Gentry, Tom Pzderka, Shane Perlowin, Chandra Shukla, Vincent Wrenn. $7/$5. blackmountaincollege.org

tick marks organized: “Cleaning My Pen,” no date. Ink on paper. Courtesy Carl Solway Gallery. Photos courtesy Black Mountain College + Arts Center. ment of $200 to one Clive Coen, for having flipped a coin for Cage. One could easily imagine it paper-clipped to a wad of cash, or maybe it was an I.O.U. “Cleaning My Pen” is just that: hundreds of small dashes and marks strewn across the page, topped with a few coffee stains. In the top right corner there is a small math problem: 35 — 4.

Why did he jot that down? Maybe to help break the negative space. Like much of the show, this piece adds to a Cage’s developing aesthetic.

One that has the slightest Japanese-watercolor appeal, making each one of these tick marks seem a tad more organized and deliberate Most of the show’s work is on loan.

Cincinnati’s Carl Solway Gallery, a collector

of contemporary prints, lent several prints, including two “Plexigrams” titled “Not Wanting to Say Anything About Marcel.” This series was created in the months following Marcel Duchamp’s death in 1969. Each of the two pieces are composed of several plexiglass panels that Cage screen-printed with fragmented words and newspaper clips. The panels are vertically positioned about an inch apart in a wooden base, allowing the layers to build into a simulated three-dimensional image.

The other, larger portion of the show’s work was borrowed from Ray Kass, a collector, artist, personal friend of Cage and the brains behind the Mountain Lake Workshops that Cage attended periodically throughout the 1980s. Kass’ series

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 59

mountain xpress presents

Bash at t h e O r a n g e Pe e l The Amazing

Kipper Schauer As RingMaster!

featuring: The Rambunctious & Radical

mad Tea Party!

The exotic & enchanting

Sirius. B!

The wild &wooly

Runaway Circus!

Plus: Games, Prizes. Local raffle, & Scrumptious Carnival Snacks*!

“Stone 15 - Brush 17 - Position H.64, V.?” Study Sheet, ca. 1988. Watercolor on paper, collection of Roy Kass. of annual interdisciplinary workshops spanned from 1980 to 2001 in Mountain Lake, Va., and resembled the group-oriented educational environment of BMC. Most of Cage’s Mountain Lake work used chance practices that he began using in his printmaking work in California during the 1970s.

Rather than organizing his visual compositions and selecting his mediums and color according to traditional aesthetic principles, he made charts based on the I Ching. The ancient Chinese divination system became a guide his decisions, making chance his most useful tool. He began applying this system to music in 1951 and soon extended it to his visual art work.

Separate charts for each decision were made and filled with color choices, brush sizes and compositional positioning for specified shapes.

Numbers were selected at random first by hand, and eventually with a random number-generating computer program (once the technology became available). Each number had a corresponding color or shape that was used upon its selection.

There are several pieces that display chance, quite literally, but none so much as “Stone 15 - Brush 17 - Position H. 64, V.?” (a fitting title, directly echoing the chance selection). Four murky blue-grey circles of varying widths crowd the bottom-right corner. A single line jets from the top circle, moving across and off the left margin of the paper. Written just below the

far left extension are Cage’s brush size, rock and position selections with their corresponding numbers.

The Mountain Lake pieces were heavily influenced by his exposure to Japanese rock gardens.

River stones were selected and placed on the paper in a fashion similar to what he saw on a trip to Tokyo. Using feathers and/or a variety of brushes, he painted around the rocks. The outcome resembles the linear designs of rock gardens. Some make more sense than others, at least on the compositional level. There is a similar look and feel to most of this series, making the pieces seem a little more cohesive. But for a few, the post-modernity is just too underwhelming.

In creating music, prints and drawings, Cage consistently ignored established aesthetics and techniques, for better and worse. This exhibition makes clear his immersion in chance selection in all facets of his work. Postmodernism and the avant-garde artist, more than most art/music/ literary/philosophical movements, have the power to confuse and overwhelm with concept, and Cage definitely has his moments. But this show conquers its original challenge and traces a visual development. It creates an aesthetic for “chance” and a composer’s work. X Kyle Sherard writes about the visual arts for Mountain Xpress and can be reached at kyle.sherard@gmail.com.

AND M O RE ! * S o m e F R E E , s o m e Ava i l a b l e f o r p u r c h a s e.

8 pm - Midnight - Doors open at 7:30 pm This is a benefit for Brother wolf Animal Rescue, MANNA Foodbank,ASAP & Riverlink $10 in advance/ $12 At the door Tickets Available at Orange Peel Box Office, theorangepeel.net or at 2 wall st.,AVL 28801 60 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

10% off any purchase!

(Bring this ad in store to receive discount.)

Acoustic & Electric Guitars • Drum Sets • Amps PA’s • Keyboards • Accessories • Books • Lessons Receive a FREE LESSON with the purchase of a guitar or drum set Just 5 minutes from downtown Asheville!

800 Fairview Rd., Suite A3, Asheville, NC • 299-3000 (in the River Ridge Shopping Center)

profilerpitch

World Famous by becky upham

carolina chocolate drops sunday, dec. 4 at the orange peel.

Show starts at 8 p.m.

Frazey Ford of the Be Good Tanyas, opens.

E m E r a l d Lo u n g E Friday, DEc. 9th 8pm - 2am

Tickets available at honeypot - 86 Lexington Ave. or online at www.brownpapertickets.com

the pitch: Sons of Ralph teams up with the Fugees. the Buzz: Recipe for Carolina Chocolate Drops: Mix together equal parts old-time music, grad school hipster and major musical talent. Add heaping teaspoon of earnestness (and a pinch of goofy fun).

Bonus points: CCD’s first Asheville show since the band won its Grammy for Best Traditional Folk Album, and a chance for fans to see their new lineup: — earlier this year, Justin Robinson left the group, and beatboxer Adam Matta and mutliinstrumentalist Hubby Jenkins joined.

John Gorka

dwight yoakam

thursday, dec. 1 at the Grey eagle.

Show starts at 8 p.m.

friday, dec. 2 at harrah’s cherokee casino.

Show starts at 9 p.m.

the pitch: David Wilcox meets an Into the Wild Eddie Vedder.

the pitch: A badass Buck Owens.

the Buzz: This New Jersey singer/songwriter has been wowing the folk circuit with his manly baritone since the 1980s. Sensitive-guy street cred earned by sharing the stage with Mary Chapin Carpenter, Nanci Griffith and Kathy Mattea.

Bonus points: A fully seated show with an 8 p.m. start; you could be home snuggling with your cat and watching Private Practice by 10.

the Buzz: He’s sold more than 25 million albums since his 1986 debut album, Guitars, Cadillacs, etc. etc. He’s been recording tracks with Beck of late, and is set to release a new album next year co-produced by Joe Chiccarelli (The Shins, The Strokes, My Morning Jacket).

Bonus points: Ex-girlfriend Sharon Stone likened him to eating a dirt sandwich. He personified pure evil in Sling Blade. He was recently mistaken for Neil Young by TMZ. What’s not to love?

LOVE 258-9264 • www.rmcs.org

Evolutional Healing

Community Acupunture/Massage Clinic

ev-o-lu-tion-al; A gradual process in which something changes into a different and usually more complex or better form.

Think about where in your life you could develop into a something better. Whether it is about; a nagging pain in your hip, irritability with others, or some slight indigestion.

Then give us a call, we can help Initial Consult $15 • Treatments $20 - $40

Kyle Chapin, B.A., M.Ac, L.Ac, C.M.T Acupuncturist

828-225-3161 107 Merrimon Ave., Suite 311 Asheville, NC 28801

evolutionalhealing.com

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 61

New Visions Marketplace Give our gently used treasures a home for the holidays!

828 681-5580

arts X big community party

Best of Bash celeBrate with Xpress on friday, dec. 2

5428 Asheville Hwy 1/2 Mi. S I-26 exit 44 Between Asheville & Hendersonville

Come one, come all, and revel in the weird and wacky, the raucous and outrageous — the spectacle that is the Best of WNC! On Friday, Dec. 2, at 7:30 p.m., the doors of the Orange Peel (this year’s Best Live Music Venue) will open, and so will the spectacularium begin.

www.newvisionsmarketplace.com

ReUse, ReCycle, ReSell!

10 am-6 pm Mon-Sat

Kipper schauer, WNC’s favorite DJ and trivia host, plays ringmaster to an awe-inspiring smorgasbord of aural delights and visual thrills. the Mad tea’s blistering blend of rockabilly swagger and multi-instrumental mayhem are sure to stir the room into a frenzy when the mountain region’s favorite fraggle rockers answer the burning question, “What the hell is fraggle pop?” Wondering that yourself?

Then don’t be afraid, step right up! After all, what carnival would be complete without a ukulele-wielding siren and howling one-man band weaving tales of love and destruction?

Lunch Buffet 7 Days A Week

80 S. Tunnel Rd., Asheville, NC (Across from Best Buy)

828-298-5001 • www.indiagardenonline.com

Surrender to mystery as the enchanting and intoxicating melodies of sirius.B transform the party into a rambling gypsy caravan with accordion-laden polkas, worldly traditionals and a slew of absurdist creations so eclectic even the band isn’t sure how to classify itself. Gypsy? Absolutely! Folk? Sure! Funk?

Now and then! Punk? At least in spirit! So gather ‘round, music lovers, and embrace the wonder, the glory, the awe of WNC’s Next Big Thing.

Throughout the evening, behold the breathtaking, gravity-defying, altogether astonishing artistry of runaway circus as acrobats leap and tumble, jugglers toss their wonders and clowns stumble and blunder, all for your viewing pleasure! Don’t miss these fascinating feats of physical strength, mental concentration and intellect-pleasing wit, all under the same roof, for one night only.

But wait, there’s more: Test your luck at a raffle of local goods. Enjoy popcorn, pretzels, ice cream, pizza and, of course, local beer, all available for purchase. All proceeds benefit Brother Wolf Animal Rescue, MANNA FoodBank, ASAP and Riverlink.

Doors at 7:30 p.m., show starts at 8 p.m.

Tickets are $10 in advance or $12 at the door (available at The Orange Peel the Mountain Xpress offices at 2 Wall St.). Read more about this year’s Best of WNC at mountainx.com/ bestof. celebrate with the Best of wnc: Above, the Mad Tea will bring a marvelous blend of ... fragglepop? (photo by Michael Traister). Below, the Runaway Circus is set to perform feats of acrobatic strength.

62 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Please note: This is a later (post-dinner) start time than in past years and will not include the same food offerings. The ticket price reflects the change.

smartbets shakespeare sings! at the altamont If you thought all the Bard could do was recite sonnets and soliloquies, here’s a new take on the age-old playwright. Shakespeare Sings!, conceived by theatrical director Francis Cullinan, highlights “Shakespeare’s words alongside famous operatic settings of Shakespeare by great composers ... seamlessly weaving together spoken word with musical interpretations of such works as Romeo and Juliet, Hamlet and Much Ado About Nothing by composers such as Verdi, Tchaikovsky, Schubert and Leonard Bernstein.” A trio, including Cullinan as host, operatic singer/actor Scott Joiner and pianist Daniel Weiser, performs the program at The Altamont Theatre. Thursday, Dec. 1, 7:30 p.m.; Sunday, Dec. 4, 4 p.m.; and Tuesday, Dec. 6, 7:30 p.m. Tickets are $18 in advance or $20 at the door. myaltamont. com.

Kristin luna ray cd release Musician, wellness advocate and educator Kristin Luna Ray has spent a lot of time traveling. She’s spent time in India and Fiji and lives part-time in Costa Rica. Her “cross-cultural roots and storytelling with a twinge of American pop and folk” are reflected in her album, Where Heaven Meets Earth, which she’ll release during a special show on Friday, Dec. 4. Musicians River Guerguerian, Chris Rosser, Alvin Young and other guests will perform with Ray. The concert takes place at 7:30 p.m. at Jubilee! Tickets are $10 or $20 with CD. kristinlunaray.com.

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 63

clubland

where to find the clubs • what is playing • listings for venues throughout Western North Carolina Clubland rules •To qualify for a free listing, a venue must be predominately dedicated to the performing arts. Bookstores and cafés with regular open mics and musical events are also allowed.

•To limit confusion, events must be submitted by the venue owner or a representative of that venue.

•Events must be submitted in written form by e-mail (clubland@mountainx.com), fax, snail mail or hand-delivered to the Clubland Editor Dane Smith at 2 Wall St., Room 209, Asheville, NC 28801. Events submitted to other staff members are not assured of inclusion in Clubland.

•Clubs must hold at least TWO events per week to qualify for listing space. Any venue that is inactive in Clubland for one month will be removed.

•The Clubland Editor reserves the right to edit or exclude events or venues.

•Deadline is by noon on Monday for that Wednesday’s publication. This is a firm deadline.

Disclaimer Standup Lounge (comedy open mic), 9pm

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm

Wild Wing Cafe

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Wing of Fire w/ Jeff & Justin (acoustic)

An Evening with John Gorka (folk)

Blend Hookah Lounge

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Front stage: Shane Perlowin

Thu., december 1

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Open mic w/ Sven Hooson Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Lobster Trap

Open mic

Valorie Miller (Americana, folk)

Blue Note Grille

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Open mic, 9pm

The Fritz (funk, rock)

BoBo Gallery

Olive or Twist

Deja Fuze w/ Dirk Quinn

Cadillac Rex (surf, rockabilly), 8pm

Dirty South Lounge

One Stop Deli & Bar

Brown Bag Songwriting Competition w/ Alex Krug, 6:30pm Live DJs, 10pm

Wax in the Back, 9pm Fred’s Speakeasy

Karaoke French Broad Chocolate Lounge

One Leg Up (jazz, swing)

Darien w/ Sarah McCoy (acoustic, singer/ songwriter)

Garage at Biltmore

TallGary’s Cantina

Burnstitch w/ Alarka & Lydia Can’t Breathe Get Down

Wed., November 30

The Underhill Family Orchestra w/ Moses Atwood

5 Walnut Wine Bar

Ben Hovey (jazz) ARCADE

Karaoke, 10pm Athena’s Club

PULP

Open mic, 7pm Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Russ & Peggy Show

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm

Asheville Music Hall

Women at Risk fundraiser feat: Dehlia Low & Every Mother’s Dream

Hoopers Creek Cafe

Dirty South Lounge

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Dirty Bingo, 9pm Ed Boudreaux’s Bayou BBQ

Back Stage: Pick Your Switch (Americana, rock) w/ Nikki Talley & Grass Monkey

Lucky James (roots, blues, swing), 8-11pm

Lobster Trap

Emerald Lounge

Hank Bones (“man of 1,000 songs”)

Dead Night w/ Phuncle Sam

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Fred’s Speakeasy

The Jeff Sipe Funk Quartet

Wendy Hayes Quartet (blues, jazz), 8-11pm

Olive or Twist

French Broad Brewery Tasting

West Coast swing dancing w/ The Heather Masterton Quartet, 8pm

Room

One Stop Deli & Bar

Pree (electric folk) Garage at Biltmore

John Farmer w/ Flight Club, Tori Clark & DJ Superman

Rotation

Orange Peel

Get Down

Make-A-Wish Benefit feat: The Buchanan Boys, The Sharkadelics & more, 6:30pm

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Vanuatu Kava Bar

The Steel Wheels (Americana) w/ Josh Oliver

Nature Films (indie, folk) w/ Smith McCaully

Open mic

Good Stuff

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Max Melner Orchestra (jazz, funk), 10pm

Westville Pub

Open mic & bluegrass jam w/ Sherry Lynn

Pisgah Brewing Company

Woody Pines (roots, blues, ragtime)

Gene Peyroux & the Acoustalectric Pedals of Love (rock, funk, soul)

PULP

Slice of Life (comedy open mic), 8:30pm

DOWNTOWN ON THE PARK fine foods • 30 brews on tap • patio sports room • 110” projector • event space open 7 Days 11am - Late • Now Catering

WED

11/30

Thursday, Dec. 1st

TALK ABOUT LIVING IN THE PLOT BALSAM MOUNTAINS, HOME OF THUNDERSTRUCK RIDGE 4-8PM

Friday, Dec. 2nd DOORS @ 4PM - SHOW 6-8 PM

CLOUDS OF GREER (AMERICANA, COUNTRY, ROCK)

thu

COMPANY RETREAT ALL SHOWS ARE FREE!

no cover charge (4-8pm)

(828) 299-3370

12 Old Charlotte Hwy., Suite H Asheville, NC 28803 www.highlandbrewing.com

w/JoSh oLIvER 8pM

John GoRkA 8pM

fri

Town MounTAIn

sat

LITTLE kInG REcoRdS ShowcASE 8pM

12/2 & ThE FREIGhT hoppERS 9pM 12/3

LIVE MUSIC... NEVER A COVER Keresey

An EvEnInG wITh

12/1

Saturday, Dec. 3rd CLOSED

ThE STEEL whEELS

(acoustic)

Sat 12/3

Howie’s House Band (rock, classic hits)

An EvEnInG wITh

sun

12/4

John doyLE, cASEy dRIESSEn And Todd phILLIpS 8pM Fred Eaglesmith | Futurebirds Amy Ray (of the Indigo Girls) | Tom Maxwell The Greyhounds | Langhorne Slim

kitchen open for dinner on nights of Shows!

FREE Parking weekdays after 5pm & all weekend (behind us on Marjorie St.)

20 S. Spruce St. • 225.6944 PacksTavern.com Off Biltmore Ave. in the new Pack Square Park.

64 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Fri 12/2

Purple Onion Cafe

Jon Shain Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Senayit

Mountain Feist (bluegrass)

Fredâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Speakeasy

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Live music French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

Back Stage: River Whyless (indie, folk, rock) w/ Uncle Mountain

Red Stag Grill

Lyndsay Wojcik (rock, folk, soul)

Eric Ciborski (piano)

Lobster Trap

Garage at Biltmore

Root Bar No. 1

Makayan w/ Wide Eyed Mischief & Nomadic

Leo Johnson & the Space Heaters (acoustic, jazz, swing)

Kevin Scanlon (bluegrass, folk)

Get Down

Mo-Daddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill

TallGaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cantina

Big Gunz w/ Razormaze & Humungus

Jimmy Thackery (blues)

Asheville music showcase

Good Stuff

Olive or Twist

Tressaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Butter Holler

Live jazz, Motown & rock, 8pm

Peggy Ratusz & friends (blues)

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

One Stop Deli & Bar

Town Mountain (bluegrass) w/ The Freight Hoppers

The Zealots w/ Antique Firearms

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Mountain Xpress Best of WNC Bash feat: Mad Tea Party, Sirius B. & more

DJ Marley Carroll, 9pm-close

Westville Pub

Laura Thurston & Wildwood Flyers (â&#x20AC;&#x153;bluesy folkâ&#x20AC;?)

Fri., december 2 ARCADE

Handlebar

Downstairs: â&#x20AC;&#x153;No Cover, No Shameâ&#x20AC;? dance party w/ Abu Dissaray, 9pm Upstairs: DJ Capital, 9pm

Ruth Moody (singer/songwriter, folk) w/ Emily Hearn & Granville Automatic Harrahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cherokee

Violin River (Grateful Dead covers)

Creatures Cafe

Dwight Yoakam (country)

Scandals Nightclub

Winston Holder, Liam McKay & Chris Wilhelm

Highland Brewing Company

Elaineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dueling Piano Bar

Clouds of Greer (country, Americana, rock), 6pm

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am

Friday Night Live w/ Disclaimer Comedy (standup) & Dueling Pianos (rock â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; roll sing-a-long)

Hoopers Creek Cafe

Southern Appalachian Brewery

Wildwood Flyers (Appalachian folk), 8-10pm

Eleven on Grove

Southern Songwriter Guitar Pull feat: David Mann, Joe Littell & Quentin Marshburn

Straightaway Cafe

Salsa Dancing w/ Waldo and Jaqui

Jack of Hearts Pub

Jenne Sluder

Emerald Lounge

Ten Cent Poetry (folk)

TallGaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cantina

Young Antiques w/ Warm the Bell & Albatross Party (pop, rock)

Jack of the Wood Pub

Elijah Hooker

Imagicnation (bluegrass)

The Chop House

Firestorm Cafe and Books

Jus One More

Live jazz w/ Mark Guest, 5-10pm

In the Land of the Sky CD release party

pinball, foosball, ping-pong & a kickass jukebox kitchen open until late

Orange Peel

Donna Germano (hammered dulcimer), 2-4pm Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm The Business (Motown funk), 8-11pm

White Horse

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Keresey (acoustic) Purple Onion Cafe

Fred Whiskin (piano) Root Bar No. 1

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Saturday, December 10th ken & Amy laDerouTe

Acoustic Rock & Soul

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The Market Place

Patrick Fitzsimons (blues, world, roots), 7:30pm Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub

4 Rounds Left (rock covers) Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

M;:D;I:7OI

Open Mic • 7 pm • $3 Highlands Local, national, international musicians

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Drink Specials • Asheville Showcase • 8 pm Listen to up and coming local talent Open at 3 pm M-Th & Fri-Sun at 11 am 4 College Street • 828.232.0809

jWbb]Whoi$Yec

Russ Wilson & His Mighty Mighty Men (swing) Westville Pub

SaT., december 3 ARCADE

Downstairs: “Bear Exploder” dance party w/ DJ Kipper Schauer, 9pm Upstairs: DJ Capital, 9pm Boiler Room

Straightaway Cafe

Gary Segal TallGary’s Cantina

Live music

Tears in My Beers (DJ set), 9pm Get Down

New Bruises w/ O’ Pioneers & Ents Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Contra dance, 8pm Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop, guitar), 6:30-10:30pm Lobster Trap

Dave Desmelik (Americana) Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

The Roaring Lions Orange Peel

Walter Arnold: The Art of Abandonment, 5:30pm Josh Gilbert (indie, folk) w/ Relentless Flood (rock), 9pm

Carolina Rex (blues) Throwdown Jones (rock, metal)

Emerald Lounge

Sharon LaMotte (vocal jazz), 7:30pm Karaoke, 10:30pm

Westville Pub

Westville Pub

Live jazz w/ Mark Guest, 5-10pm

Vortex (Marion)

Corduroy Road (roots) White Horse

Jeremy Current Band (folk, Americana)

Benefit for women’s prison ministry feat: Every Mothers Dream, Kim Hughes, Bob Hinkle & more

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Wild Wing Cafe

DJ Dizzy ‘90s Throwback Night

Beirut (indie, folk, world) w/ Perfume Genius The Bywater

Bluegrass jam, 8:30pm Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Open mic Wild Wing Cafe

Karaoke

Tue., december 6 Eleven on Grove

SuN., december 4

Swing lessons, 6:30 & 7:30pm Tango lessons, 7pm Dance w/ Cry Baby, 8:30pm

ARCADE

Firestorm Cafe and Books

Hallelujah Hullabaloo w/ DJs Jamie Hepler, Whitney Shroyer & friends Dirty South Lounge

Micheal “Lucky” Luchtan (golden-era country), 9am Open mic, 7:30pm

Drive-by Sci-Fi, 9pm

Garage at Biltmore

Little King Records Showcase feat: Big Daddy Love, A.V.A.S., Evergreen & The Toneblazers

Get Down

Phat Tuesdays

Hume w/ Soft Opening (psychedelic rock)

Get Down

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Mutilation Rites w/ Shadow of the Destroyer

An Evening With John Doyle, Casey Driessen & Todd Phillips

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Jucifer w/ Slaw & Free Lunch Good Stuff

Katey Sleeveless & Adam Hawkins Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

6:00 pM

The Stipe Brothers (rock) 8-10pm

Dirty South Lounge

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Get Down

thur, DeceMber 15

Southern Appalachian Brewery

moN., december 5

Creatures Cafe

Crazyhorse & Colston w/ Neck Breakas Society

Dopplebock release at barley’s DoWntoWn

Gary Cody w/ Desperado

Drum circle, 2pm

The Chop House

Garage at Biltmore

7:00 pM

Scandals Nightclub

White Horse

Envy of the Wicked (rock, metal) w/ Figurehead & Eating the Sun

Jazzville Band

WeD, DeceMber 7

Wilhelm McKay (folk, rock)

Shovelhead Saloon

Asheville Jazz Orchestra Christmas show

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

WooDy pines

Root Bar No. 1

White Horse

Karaoke

shoW 8:00 pM - Free shoW

Sherri Lynn & friends

Trivia night

Fred’s Speakeasy

thur, DeceMber 1

Rocky’s Hot Chicken Shack

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am

The Southern Lights (Southern rock, Americana)

Music & EvEnts

Eric Ciborski (piano)

Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm Underhill Rose (country, folk, soul), 8-11pm

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Alarm Clock Conspiracy (power pop)

Two Guitars (classical), 10am-noon Bob Zullo (jazz, pop), 6:30-10:30pm

Jack of the Wood Pub

Hotel Indigo

Jack of Hearts Pub

Brown Chicken Brown Cow (Americana, folk)

Ben Hovey (multi-instrumentalist, electronic, soul), 7-10pm

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm Hotel Indigo

Ben Hovey (multi-instrumentalist, electronic, soul), 7-10pm Jack of the Wood Pub

Back stage: Skinny Legs & All (rock, blues) w Beta Maxx

Jack of the Wood Pub

Singer/songwriter in the round feat: Amanda Platt, Nikki Talley & Jen Duke

Irish session, 3 & 5pm

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Lobster Trap

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Front stage: Jake Hollifield (blues, ragtime)

Jazz Trio

Front stage: Aaron Price (piano)

Lobster Trap

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Lobster Trap

Jay Brown (Americana, folk), 7pm

Honkey Tonkin’ Don Humphries, 6pm John Wesley Satterfield (rock, folk) w/ The Damn Fine Band, 9:30pm

Leo Johnson (hot club jazz), 7pm

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

One Stop Deli & Bar

Matt Anderson (acoustic rock)

Bluegrass brunch w/ The Pond Brothers, 11am

Olive or Twist

Olive or Twist

Orange Peel

Al Coffee McDaniel (blues, soul), 8-11pm

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

The 42nd Street Jazz Band, 8pm

Carolina Chocolate Drops (old-time) w/ Frazey Ford

One Stop Deli & Bar

Kung Fu Dynamite (funk, rock, jam) w/ Domino Effect

Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Music trivia, 8pm Funk jam, 10pm

Psychobilly Sock Hop Sundays

Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Orange Peel

Scandals Nightclub

Tuesday Rotations w/ Chris Ballard & guests, 10pm

valDez pairing at French broaD chocolate lounge

One Stop Deli & Bar

Details & aDvance tickets:

Pack’s Tavern

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12am

Howie’s House Band (rock covers)

The Bywater

“Garyoke”

Purple Onion Cafe

Miriam & the Passionistas (Latin, folk), 5-8pm

The Bywater

Overmountain Men

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Open mic w/ Taylor Martin, 8:30pm

Red Stag Grill

Vocal jazz session w/ Sharon LaMotte, 7:30pm

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

pisgahbrewing.com

Taproom Hours: M-W: 4pm - 9pm th-sat: 2pm - 12am | sun: 2pm - 9pm 66 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Jars of Clay w/ Drew Holcomb & The Neighbors

TallGary’s Cantina

clubdirectory 5 walnut wine Bar 253-2593 the 170 la cantinetta 687-8170 all stars sports Bar & Grill 684-5116 altamont Brewing company 575-2400 arcade 258-1400 asheville civic center & thomas wolfe auditorium 259-5544 asheville Music hall 255-7777 athena’s club 252-2456 avenue M 350-8181 Barley’s tap room 255-0504 Beacon pub 686-5943 Black Mountain ale house 669-9090 Blend hookah lounge 505-0067 Blue Mountain pizza 658-8777 Blue note Grille 697-6828 Boiler room 505-1612 BoBo Gallery 254-3426 Broadway’s 285-0400 Burgerworx 253-2333 the Bywater 232-6967 clingman cafe 253-2177 club hairspray 258-2027 the chop house 253-1852 craggie Brewing company 254-0360 creature’s cafe 254-3636 curras nuevo 253-2111 desoto lounge 986-4828 diana wortham theater 257-4530

World Beat Latin Music Jam Westville Pub

Blues jam White Horse

Irish sessions, 6:30pm Open mic, 8:45pm Wild Wing Cafe

Video trivia, 8pm

Wed., december 7 5 Walnut Wine Bar

dirty south lounge 251-1777 the dripolator 398-0209 dobra tea room 575-2424 ed Boudreaux’s Bayou BBQ 296-0100 eleven on Grove 505-1612 emerald lounge 232- 4372 fairview tavern 505-7236 feed & seed + Jamas acoustic 216-3492 firestorm cafe 255-8115 frankie Bones 274-7111 fred’s speakeasy 281-0920 fred’s speakeasy south 684-2646 french Broad Brewery tasting room 277-0222 french Broad chocolate lounge 252-4181 the Garage 505-2663 the Get down 505-8388 Good stuff 649-9711 Grey eagle Music hall & tavern 232-5800 Grove house eleven on Grove 505-1612 the Grove park inn (elaine’s piano Bar/ Great hall) 252-2711 the handlebar (864) 233-6173 hannah flanagans 252-1922 harrah’s cherokee 497-7777 havana restaurant 252-1611 haywood lounge 232-4938 highland Brewing company 299-3370 holland’s Grille 298-8780

clubland@mountainx.com

the hop 254-2224 the hop west 252-5155 iron horse station 622-0022 Jack of the wood 252-5445 Jerusalem Garden 254-0255 Jus one More 253-8770 laurey’s catering 252-1500 lexington avenue Brewery 252-0212 the lobster trap 350-0505 luella’s Bar-B-Que 505-RIBS Mack Kell’s pub & Grill 253-8805 the Magnetic field 257-4003 Midway tavern 687-7530 Mela 225-8880 Mellow Mushroom 236-9800 Mike’s side pocket 281-3096 Mo-daddy’s Bar & Grill 258-1550 northside Bar and Grill 254-2349 olive or twist 254-0555 o’Malley’s on Main 246-0898 one stop Bar deli & Bar 236-2424 the orange peel 225-5851 pack’s tavern 225-6944 pisgah Brewing co.

669-0190 poppie’s Market and cafe 885-5494 posana cafe 505-3969 pulp 225-5851 purple onion cafe 749-1179 rankin Vault 254-4993

the recovery room 684-1213 red stag Grill at the Grand Bohemian hotel 505-2949 rendezvous 926-0201 root Bar no.1 299-7597 scandals nightclub 252-2838 scully’s 251-8880 shovelhead saloon 669-9541 skyland performing arts center 693-0087 shifters 684-1024 smokey’s after dark 253-2155 southern appalacian Brewery 684-1235 straightaway cafe 669-8856 tallGary’s cantina 232-0809 red room 252-0775 rocky’s hot chicken shack 575-2260 thirsty Monk south 505-4564 tolliver’s crossing irish pub 505-2129 town pump 669-4808 tressa’s downtown Jazz & Blues 254-7072 Vanuatu Kava 505-8118 the Village wayside 277-4121 Vincenzo’s Bistro 254-4698 wedge Brewery 505 2792 well Bred Bakery & cafe 645-9300 westville pub 225-9782 white horse 669-0816 wild wing cafe 253-3066

Ben Hovey (multi-instrumentalist, electronic, soul), 8-10pm

Wax in the Back, 9pm

ARCADE

Karaoke

Karaoke, 10pm

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Asheville Music Hall

Paul Jones (jazz, classical)

George Porter Jr. & Runnin’ Pardners

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Athena’s Club

Disclaimer Standup Lounge (comedy open mic), 9pm

shane perlOwin

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w/ uncle MOuntain SaT. de c . 3

skinnY legs and all w/ Beta Maxx

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Aaron Price 1pm | Piano

TUE - OPEN BLUES JAM

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$1 OFF ALL WHISKEY

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$3.50 GIN & TONICS

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The Black Mountain and Downtown Asheville Locations!

Fred’s Speakeasy

Futurebirds (psychedelic, country) & Grass Giraffes Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Open mic w/ Sven Hooson

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm

Dirty South Lounge

Handlebar

Blend Hookah Lounge

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Downtown Asheville • 45 S. French Broad Street • 9-7 Mon-Sat • Sun 10-5 BlAck MountAin • 3018 US 70 • 9-7pm Mon-Sat • Closed Sun Asheville • 121 Sweeten Creek Road • 9-7pm Mon-Sat • Closed Sun

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mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 67

Amy Lavere (alt-country) w/ The Ragged Orchids

o r g a n I c J u I ce & t e a B a r wellness center featuring network care and nia classes

IntroducIng a new menu all organic juices now just $5 - Free wifi - Free Parking 347 Depot Street • Asheville • 828.255.2770 • NourishFlourishNow.com

Jus One More

Gene Peyroux & the Acoustalectric Pedals of Love (rock, funk, soul)

Downstairs: “No Cover, No Shame” dance party w/ Abu Dissaray, 9pm Upstairs: DJ Capital, 9pm

Fox Black (acoustic)

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Asheville Music Hall

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Front stage: Shane Perlowin

Galen Kipar Project (folk rock) w/ Taylor Martin’s Engine & Whetherman

Enter the Earth Christmas party w/ The Work & Lyric

Lobster Trap

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Creatures Cafe

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm

Sing the Sound (indie, rock)

Chompin’ at the Bit String Band

Hoopers Creek Cafe

Olive or Twist

Open mic & bluegrass jam w/ Sherry Lynn

Friday Night Live w/ Disclaimer Comedy (standup) & Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long)

Cadillac Rex (surf, rockabilly), 8pm

Lobster Trap

Eleven on Grove

One Stop Deli & Bar

Hank Bones (“man of 1,000 songs”)

Zumba “In da Club,” 8pm

Olive or Twist

Emerald Lounge

Sunshine Jones

Orange Peel

West Coast swing dancing w/ The Heather Masterton Quartet, 8pm

Digitalism (electronic, house) w/ Data Romance

Orange Peel

Live music

Root Bar No. 1

10 Cent Poetry (folk) w/ For the Birds

Hometown Holiday Jam XI feat: Sons of Ralph, The Nova Echo, Marc Keller & more

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

TallGary’s Cantina

Pisgah Brewing Company

Open mic, 7pm

Nora Jane Struthers (Americana)

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Westville Pub

PULP

Max Melner Orchestra (jazz, funk), 10pm

Slice of Life (comedy open mic), 8:30pm

Wild Wing Cafe

Purple Onion Cafe

Valorie Miller (Americana, folk) Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Brown Bag Songwriting Competition w/ Alex Krug, 6:30pm

Wing of Fire w/ Jeff & Justin (acoustic)

Thu., december 8 Asheville Music Hall

Good Stuff

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Fred’s Speakeasy

Brushfire Stankgrass (progressive bluegrass) High Gravity Jazz Garage at Biltmore

XXX Mas feat: DJ Hipnotik Get Down

Uptown Jazz Quartet

Greevance (metal) w/ Opus Grey & Gutterhound

Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Good Stuff

Marley Carroll, 9pm-close

Wilhelm McKay

Comedy night w/ Pierre Edwards (hosted by Bigg Mann & DJ iPod Shorty)

Root Bar No. 1

Dirty South Lounge

TallGary’s Cantina

Amy Ray (of The Indigo Girls) w/ The Shadowboxers

Dirty Bingo, 9pm

Asheville music showcase

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Ed Boudreaux’s Bayou BBQ

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Lucky James (roots, blues, swing), 8-11pm

Peggy Ratusz & friends (blues)

Fred’s Speakeasy

Westville Pub

Wendy Hayes Quartet (blues, jazz), 8-11pm

The Deacon Brandon Reeves (roots, rock)

Donna Germano (hammered dulcimer), 2-4pm Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm The Business (Motown funk), 8-11pm

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

White Horse

Ten Cent Poetry (folk, pop)

Box for Beer anti-hunger benefit

Garage at Biltmore

Fri., december 9

As Sick As Us (metal) w/ Elysion Fields, Lifecurse & From a Dig

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Jay Brown (Americana, folk)

ARCADE

Highland Brewing Company

Chalwa (reggae), 4pm Jack of Hearts Pub

Jay Brown & Sara Carlisle (blues) Jack of the Wood Pub

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68 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

(S. Asheville/Arden)

Sarah Lee Guthrie & Johnny Irion (Americana) w/ Amanda Jo Williams Afterparty w/ Harvest Records (live DJs) Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

White Horse

Pops Furgeson Blues Revue

SaT., december 10

Back Stage: Xmas Jam by Day w/ Kevn Kinney, noon Xmas Jam afterparty w/ The Get Right Band, 10pm

ARCADE

Lobster Trap

Asheville Music Hall

Calico Moon (Americana, folk, country)

Xmas Jam by Day

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Blue Note Grille

Taylor Martin’s Engine w/ The Kenneth Brian Band Olive or Twist

Live jazz, Motown & rock, 8pm Pack’s Tavern

Steven Poteat Trio (rock) Pisgah Brewing Company

Viva DeConcini (rock) Purple Onion Cafe

Fred Whiskin (piano) Root Bar No. 1

Sunday Jam Presents Scandals Nightclub

Downstairs: “Bear Exploder” dance party w/ DJ Kipper Schauer, 9pm Upstairs: DJ Capital, 9pm

Jennifer Scott

Emerald Lounge

David Earl & the Plowshares (rock, soul) w/ Vagabond Swing Fred’s Speakeasy

Karaoke French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Lorraine Conard (folk) Full moon party

Coping Stone

Just Die! w/ Drunk in a Dumpster & The Budget

TallGary’s Cantina

Good Stuff

WestSound (R&B)

Jenne Sluder

The Chop House

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Wyndy Trail Travelers (newgrass, Americana) Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

The Nightcrawlers (dance, blues, rock) Vortex (Marion)

Honky Tonkin’ Don Humphries, 6pm JP Harris & the Tough Choices w/ Robert Greer & His Honkey Tonk Outlaws, 9:30pm Olive or Twist

The 42nd Street Jazz Band, 8pm One Stop Deli & Bar

Pack’s Tavern

Nathan Billingsley (folk)

Get Down

Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Creatures Cafe

Straightaway Cafe

Patrick Fitzsimons (blues, world, roots), 7:30pm

Jazz Trio

Hops & Arias (opera), 8-9:30pm

Garage at Biltmore

The Market Place

Lobster Trap

Local Hip Hop Showcase w/ Crazyhorse & Colston, Neck Breaka Society, Bobby Fn White & more

Craggie Brewing Company

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am

Live jazz w/ Mark Guest, 5-10pm

Back Stage: Xmas Jam by Day w/ Kevn Kinney, noon

Holy Ghost Tent Revival (roots, Americana, folk) w/ Farewell Drifters & Mike Quinn Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm Viva, 8-11pm Jack of Hearts Pub

Ken & Amy LaDeroute (rock, soul)

96.5 House Band (rock covers) Purple Onion Cafe

Wendy Hayes Root Bar No. 1

Nick Young (country, pop) Scandals Nightclub

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am Straightaway Cafe

Ken Kiser TallGary’s Cantina

Chatterbox The Chop House

Live jazz w/ Mark Guest, 5-10pm The Market Place

Ben Hovey (multi-instrumentalist, electronic, soul), 7:30-11pm Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Jim Arrendell & the Cheap Suits (dance) Vortex (Marion)

The Caribbean Cowboys (classic rock, reggae) Westville Pub

Alex Krug Trio (rock, Americana) White Horse

No Alibi

Jack of the Wood Pub

The Billy Sea

Westville Pub

The Broadcast (soul, rock)

Wild Wing Cafe

Trivia night

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

DJ Dizzy ‘90s Throwback Night

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 69

crankyhanke

theaterlistings Friday, dECEMBEr 2 Thursday, dECEMBEr 8

Due to possible last-minute scheduling changes, moviegoers may want to confirm showtimes with theaters. n asHeville Pizza & Brewing Co. (254-1281)

Please call the info line for updated showtimes. a dolphin tale (Pg) 1:00, 4:00 the Help (Pg-13) 7:00 Killer elite (r) 10:00 n CarmiKe Cinema 10 (298-4452)

arthur Christmas 3d (Pg) 2:15, 4:30, 6:45, 9:20 arthur Christmas 2d (Pg) 1:15, 3:30, 5:45, 8:20 Happy Feet 2 3d (Pg) 1:50, 4:45, 7:15, 9:30 (no 4:45 or 7:15 on 12/6) Happy Feet 2 2d (Pg) 1:25, 3:45, 6:20, 8:50 Hugo 3d (Pg) 3:15, 6:30, 9:40 Hugo 2d (Pg) 2:30, 5:30, 8:40 Jack and Jill (Pg) 1:40, 4:15, 6:40, 9:10 (no 1:40 on 12/3 or 12/4) Pokemon white: victini and zeckrom (g) 1:00 Sat-Sun the twilight saga: Breaking dawn — Part 1 (Pg-13) 1:00, 2:00, 3:00, 4:00, 5:00, 6:00, 8:00, 9:00, 10:00

Carolina asHeville Cinema 14 (274-9500) n

arthur Christmas (Pg) 11:35, 1:55, 4:25, 7:20, 9:45 Happy Feet two 3d (Pg) 11:10, 9:50 Happy Feet two 2d (Pg) 2:00, 4:35, 7:15 Hugo 3d (Pg) 11:20, 2:15, 5:00, 7:50, 10:30 Hugo 2d (Pg) 11:05, 1:50, 4:30, 7:05, 9:50 the ides of march (r) 8:00, 10:25 (Sofa cinema) immortals (r) 11:55, 2:30, 4:55, 7:40, 10:15 J. edgar (r) 12:05, 3:15, 7:35, 10:30 Jack and Jill (Pg) 12:10, 2:25, 4:40, 7:45, 10:00 (Sofa cinema) like Crazy (Pg-13) 12:00, 2:10, 4:30, 7:55, 10:20

margin Call (r) 11:40, 2:20, 4:45, 7:25, 9:55 (Sofa cinema) melancholia (r) 12:30, 4:00, 7:00, 10:00 the muppets (Pg) 11:15, 1:45, 4:15, 7:10, 9:40 Puss in Boots 2d (Pg) 11:25, 1:45, 4:10 (Sofa cinema) tower Heist (Pg-13) 11:30, 2:05 (Sofa cinema) the twilight saga: Breaking dawn — Part 1 (Pg-13) 11:00, 1:40, 4:20, 4:50, 7:00, 7:30, 9:40, 10:10 n CineBarre (665-7776)

50/50 (r) 10:05 (Sun only), 12:20, 2:50, 5:05. 7:20, 9:40 Contagion (Pg-13) 9:55 (Sun only), 2:35, 7:45 dolphin tale (Pg) 9:45 (Sun only), 12:10, 2:40, 5:10, 7:35, 9:55 dream House (Pg-13) 12:10, 5:00, 10:10 the Help (Pg-13) 11:00 (fri-Sun), 2:00, 4:55, 7:50, 10:35 the three musketeers (Pg-13) 9:50 (Sun only),12:05, 2:45, 5:15, 7:40, 10:00 n Co-ed Cinema Brevard (883-2200)

J. edgar (r) 1:00, 4:00, 7:00 n ePiC oF Hendersonville (693-1146) n Fine arts tHeatre (232-1536)

martha marcy may marlene (r) 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, late show fri-Sat 9:20 the skin i live in (r) wed-thu 1:20, late show fri-Sat 9:45 the way (Pg-13) 4:20, 7:20 n FlatroCK Cinema (697-2463)

anonymous (Pg-13) 12:00 (Sat-Sun only), 3:30, 7:00 n regal Biltmore grande stadium 15 (684-1298) n united artists BeauCatCHer (298-1234)

for some theaters movie listings were not available at press time. Please contact the theater or check mountainx.com for updated information.

movie reviews & listings by ken hanke

JJJJJ max rating

additional reviews by justin souther contact xpressmovies@aol.com

pickoftheweek Hugo

JJJJJ

Director: Martin ScorSeSe PlayerS: Ben KingSley, aSa ButterfielD, chloë grace Moretz, Sacha Baron cohen, helen Mccrory, chriStoPher lee, JuDe law Fantasy Comedy drama

rated Pg

The Story: The story of 12-year-old Hugo Cabret, who lives inside the walls of a train station in 1930s Paris — his adventures, his efforts to rebuild an automaton and the discoveries all this leads to.

The Lowdown: An almost impossibly great movie that is by turns funny, touching and profound. This goes beyond being a must-see. This is in a class by itself.

Martin Scorsese’s Hugo is quite simply a masterpiece. Full stop. It’s that absolutely rarest kind of movie: One which constantly reminds why you love movies. This is true even after the film has ended, when you are hardly able to contain a desire to run right out and tell others that they need to see this movie. I actually succumbed to doing just that — and in a sense that’s what I’m still doing here. As soon as the lights went up in the theater, I told my viewing companions (both of whom know I rarely talk about a movie right after it’s over) that I honestly felt that seeing the film was a privilege. The moment I got home from seeing the film, I started telling people to “stop whatever you’re doing and go see Hugo.”

There are, of course, those who will automatically denigrate Hugo for not being as “important” as Scorsese’s other films, and claim that it’s a lesser work because it’s a “children’s” film (though it really isn’t). What a sad and short-sighted view that is. I think it is quite likely Scorsese’s masterpiece — and almost certainly the most personal film he has ever made. Yes, it is a film about a boy, Hugo Cabret (Asa Butterfield, Nanny McPhee Returns), who lives in the walls of a Paris train station in the 1930s, but it’s also considerably more than that. It’s a movie about the movies, and about the people who make them and the people who love them. It’s the story of the birth of every movie geek — and in that way, it’s Scorsese’s own story as well as our own.

It’s about the history of the movies, the passing of time and the cruelty of changing tastes.

It’s about dreams, the magic of the movies and their unique ability to make dreams real. And it’s the most elegant and beautiful film of the year — possibly of the 21st century thus far.

70 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

Asa Butterfield and Ben Kingsley in Martin Scorsese’s absolutely marvelous Hugo.

For those who don’t know, Hugo tells the story of a boy whose father (Jude Law in one of his best performances) is killed in a museum fire. The boy, Hugo, is then taken over by his rough and generally drunk Uncle Claude (Ray Winstone), whose job is to tend the clocks in the railway station. When Uncle Claude disappears, Hugo continues to live in the station and keep the clocks going — realizing that so long as the clocks run accurately no one is going to notice (or care) that Claude isn’t there. Not only does Hugo not want to be sent to an orphan asylum, but he wants to finish a project he started with his father — the rebuilding of an automaton that was found in the museum where his father worked. The automaton is a small mechanical man, whose function — in this case, an unusually elaborate one — appears to have been to write.

In order to find parts for the machine, Hugo has taken to stealing toys from Papa Georges’ (Ben Kingsley) toy stand in the station and adapting their inner workings to the automaton. That’s all well and good so long as the embittered Station Inspector (Sacha Baron Cohen) doesn’t catch him. And though that doesn’t happen, Papa Georges does catch the boy and becomes unaccountably upset when he sees the little notebook Hugo has that details the automaton’s workings. In fact, he takes the booklet from the boy with a plan to burn it, which he appears to do — although Papa Georges’ ward Isabelle (Chloe Grace Moretz) reveals to Hugo that this hasn’t happened. The story then becomes a mystery about what secret Papa Georges is harboring — and why Isabelle has the key that allows the automaton to function. And that mystery

deepens when the thing does work and the pair see what it does. Beyond that — for the benefit of those who know little of the film’s plot — I’m going to say no more, except to note that Papa Georges turns out to be a real person and one of the great pioneers of filmmaking.

The depth of what is going on and what is being addressed in this film is simply amazing. As far as I’m concerned, absolutely all of it works. That includes the story itself, though there’s more here than the story — moving and beguiling as it is. The film manages to capture the essence of cinema, to trace the history of it, celebrate it, and offer the most heartbreaking cry for film preservation I’ve ever seen. And it does this last not by preaching about the topic, but by making it wholly human and putting a face to it — and a real face at that — so that it becomes as much a very personal tragedy — and triumph — as an artistic one.

I cannot recommend Hugo too highly. It is superb on every level — from its technical accomplishments to every aspect of every performer. (I never thought I could so absolutey love Christopher Lee as I do here.) It’s a film of almost unbearable — even heartbreaking — beauty in every sense. Its sheer humanity is astonishing — as is its utter lack of postmodern irony and cynicism. This is a fine, fine film that ought to be seen by anyone who loves the movies. Rated PG for mild thematic material, some action/peril and smoking. reviewed by Ken Hanke Playing at Carmike 10, Carolina Asheville Cinema 14, Regal Biltmore Grande

artHur CHristmas JJJJ

DIRECTOR: SARAH SMITH PLAYERS: (VOICES) JAMES MCAVOY, HUGH LAURIE, BILL NIGHY, JIM BROADBENT, IMELDA STAUNTON animated Fantasy

rated Pg

The Story: When a child is missed at Christmas, Santa’s younger son, Arthur, teams up with Grandsanta to get her present to her.

The Lowdown: A wholly pleasant and pleasing outburst of family-friendly seasonal fare that’s both winning and funny.

The otherwise pretty agreeable Arthur Christmas really ought to come with a warning that before the film actually starts — indeed, before the Columbia Torch Lady appears — the viewer is going to be subjected to Justin Bieber (with some kind of moussed-into-submission badass hairdo and ludicrous rough trade costumery) in a music video. So before the movie, you have to wade through about three minutes of the Bieberized techno/dance-mix version of “Santa Claus Is Coming to Town” — with some sort of “shake it, shake it, baby” break. And it doesn’t end there, since the Bieberific yowling returns over the latter part of the ending credits. With this in mind, I’d suggest sprinting from the theater the moment Bill Nighy’s impression of Jimmy Durante singing “Make Someone Happy” ends. You are warned.

Now, the movie proper is a very pleasant — if hardly overwhelmingly great — animated Christmas fantasy with at least two inspired choices for voice casting with Jim Broadbent as Santa and Bill Nighy as his father, Grandsanta.

(Some reviewers have wondered how American audiences will take to Santa with a Brit accent — a strange concern considering the movies’ bestloved Santa Claus was British Edmund Gwenn in the seasonal staple Miracle on 34th Street.) The film doesn’t bring anything revelatory to this type of movie — apart from a somewhat cynically adult (not in the “dirty” meaning) sense of humor — but there’s no evidence that it was trying to do anything other than be good at what it is. And it is.

The concept is pretty straightforward. The current Santa (Broadbent) is mostly a figurehead by this point and on the brink — or so it seems — of retiring and turning over the reins to his son Steve (Hugh Laurie). Well, he might expect there aren’t any reins these days, since the battlefatigue-wearing Steve uses a high-tech spaceship affair and an army of special-op elves to get the job done. In fact, the humorless Steve’s only concession to Christmas is a tree-shaped goatee. But Santa has another son, Arthur (James McAvoy), who’s a bit of a klutz and whose job is to answer letters to Santa. But since Arthur is a true believer, he’s good with that. The story itself involves what happens when one child’s present doesn’t get delivered. Steve doesn’t care and Santa isn’t much more concerned.

Arthur, on the other hand, is aghast — and Grandsanta has a plan. Unbeknownst to everyone, he has the old sleigh and the reindeer in readiness. So Grandsanta, a not-exactly-willing Arthur and a wrapping-obsessed elf, Bryony (Ashley Jensen) — plus eight working reindeer

and one very bedraggled pet one — set out to right this holiday oversight. Naturally, this proves much harder to do than might be imagined — thanks in no small part to the fact that Grandsanta is 136 years old and not entirely sharp. He’s also not entirely honest, since his motive has less to do with getting the overlooked child her present and more to do with proving that he’s not “past it” and the old ways in the old sleigh have their merits.

There’s nothing groundbreaking here, but the results are unfailingly pleasant and sweet-natured — much as a family Christmas ought to be. That also means that life-lessons will be learned and the the true meaning of Christmas (in the secular sense) will be restored. Considering the nature of the movie, you expected otherwise? I mean, even A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas did that. The point is that it works and it works well — being both surprisingly touching and funny. Rated PG for some mild rude humor. reviewed by Ken Hanke Playing at Carmike 10, Carolina Asheville Cinema 14, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande

melanCHolia JJJJJ

DIRECTOR: LARS VON TRIER PLAYERS: KIRSTEN DUNST, CHARLOTTE GAINSBOURG, KIEFER SUTHERLAND, ALEXANDER SKARSGåRD, CHARLOTTE RAMPLING, JOHN HURT allegoriCal sCi-Fi drama

rated r

The Story: The end of the world — and the effects of its approach on a small group of the fabulously wealthy.

The Lowdown: Dark, strange and somehow terrible, but also compelling and a masterful, powerful film.

Lars von Trier meets the end of the world. The world loses. Lars von Trier’s Melancholia is a difficult and weighty proposition — and it’s not your normal movie. I wouldn’t even call it normal von Trier — whatever that even means. My reaction to Melancholia — which I think is probably within shouting distance of a kind of greatness — is equally difficult. I can’t say I like the film. I’m not even sure that it’s possible to like it in any normal sense. But I had a strong, visceral reaction to it and find myself haunted by it in ways I can’t make entirely clear in my own mind. I’m also not sure I want to watch it again, though I feel I’ll be drawn to do so.

This is a long film and a pretty slow one.

It commences with a beautiful and disturbing eight-minute sequence — set to the “Prelude” from Wagner’s Tristan und Isolde — that depicts the essence of the rest of the movie in both literal and allegorical terms. The sequence is done in a very formal — even classical — style.

It reflects several things — ranging from Last Year at Marienbad (1961) to Millais’ painting of Ophelia — while other aspects are completely its own. For that matter, the overall feeling is unique to Melancholia. Some of the images we will encounter again at the end of the film — though in altered forms. Other images are best thought of as portents and visions of things to come. It’s also possibly all happening inside the mind of Justine (Kirsten Dunst in a fearless performance) — the film suggests as much along the way.

mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 71

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From there the movie goes into “Part One: Justine,” which ostensibly focuses on that character and that’s at least sort of true. The style of the film shifts dramatically at this point, eschewing the formal style for a hand-held camera and an almost cinéma vérité look as it follows Justine’s wedding reception — an incredibly expensive affair put on by her sister Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg) with her sister’s husband Jack’s (Kiefer Sutherland) money (a fact he never lets anyone forget). The mood shifts as well, ranging from the apparent good humor (which might be a form of hysteria in retrospect) of the bride to the first sighting of the planet Melancholia to the bitchy in-fighting of the relatives and guests.

Once things start going wrong they go increasingly wrong because we’re watching Justine disintegrate.

The second part of the film is called “Claire” and the cast is basically reduced to Claire, Jack, their son (Cameron Spurr) and Justine. They alternately wait for Melancholia to collide with the Earth and hope it won’t. But the dynamic has changed. Justine is increasingly pulled together by the prospect of impending doom, while Claire falls apart. In fact, her actions start to resemble Justine’s earlier ones. It’s giving nothing away to reveal that the film is going to end with the end of the world, since we already saw that at the beginning. I’m half-inclined to believe that only this little, wholly separate privileged microcosm is destroyed and that the end of the world is more allegorical than literal, despite what we see, but that’s the disturbing and endlessly debatable strength of the film. There is some reason that the place is hard to get into and, for some, nearly impossible to get out of.

The very last section — however you interpret it — returns to a more formal style, which again only increases the visceral nature of what happens. I think part of what I find so haunting and disturbing about the film’s Wagner-soaked finale (hey, if the world ends, it needs the operatic) is in part due to von Trier’s use of the music. Like the opera itself, he keeps moving it to the “Liebestod” (Love Death) — which certainly and literally fits Justine’s embracing of death. Unlike the opera, von Trier never erupts into the “Liebestod” and leaves us uncomfortably hanging. This is strong stuff, but worth it if you’re up to it. Rated R for some graphic nudity, sexual content and language. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at Carolina Asheville Cinema 14

Tune In to Cranky Hanke’s Movie Reviews

4:35 pm Fridays on Local Edge Radio.

72 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 • mountainx.com

tHe muPPets JJJJ

DIRECTOR: JAMES BOBIN PLAYERS: JASON SEGEL, AMY ADAMS, CHRIS COOPER, RASHIDA JONES musiCal PuPPet Comedy

rated Pg

The Story: Kermit the Frog and gang must reunite to save their old theater.

The Lowdown: A sufficiently warmhearted nostalgia trip that will play best to diehard Muppets fans.

If you carry plenty of nostalgia for The Muppets and have been expectantly waiting for them to return to the big screen, you will be more than satisfied with this loving and respectful reboot of Jim Henson’s foam-filled creations. The Muppets is exactly what any self-respecting Muppet fan will want out of the movie. At the same time, the film holds little else of value for anyone who wasn’t weened on Kermit and company.

My only real childhood Muppet encounters were Kermit the Frog’s occasional appearances on Sesame Street. Perhaps screenwriters Jason Segel and Nicholas Stoller anticipated this sort of generational divide, setting the story in a world where The Muppets are mostly forgotten, washed-up former stars. After a bit of extraneous set-up involving Segel’s very human Gary and his brother Walter (voiced by Sesame Street alum Peter Linz), who’s quite obviously a puppet (perhaps their milkman was Howdy Doody), the plot kicks in. After stumbling upon the diabolical plan of an oil baron Tex Richman (Chris Cooper), who wants to tear down the old Muppet Theatre, it’s up to Walter, Gary and Gary’s girlfriend Mary (Amy Adams) to reassemble the Muppets and to put on a telethon. From there, your enjoyment of the film is wholly dependent on how much you’re on its wavelength of jokey Vaudevillian musical numbers and meta-humor.

Saying that, there’s nothing really wrong with the movie. The film is enjoyable, mostly due to lead Jason Segel, but less because of his schmaltzy character in the film and more because of his co-written script. This is a man who has regularly gone on record about his love of The Muppets, and this care is evident throughout the movie. Most of the best humor is drawn from inside jokes and postmodern fourth wall-breaking, all of it driven by a sense of wistful nostalgia.

And that’s the whole point. Perhaps reboot is the wrong term to use for The Muppets, as its actually more of a reintroduction, as the whole purpose is to remind the world about The Muppets.

While the jokes are occasionally clever — and usually work better when there’s a degree of subtlety at hand — the litmus test really comes down to whether or not you can honestly care for the trials and tribulations of a foam pig, or if you can stomach the idea of hearing “The Rainbow Connection” for the billionth time. Fans will certainly be pleased, while everyone else — despite the film’s pleasantness — will still be left wondering what the big deal is. Rated PG for some mild rude humor. reviewed by Justin Souther Playing at Carolina Asheville Cinema 14, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande, United Artists Beaucatcher Cinema 7

filmsociety island oF lost souls JJJJJ

DIRECTOR: ERLE C. KENTON PLAYERS: CHARLES LAUGHTON, RICHARD ARLEN, BELA LUGOSI, LEILA HYAMS, KATHLEEN BURKE Horror rated nr Erle C. Kenton’s Island of Lost Souls (1932) is without a doubt the grimmest and most completely horrific of all “golden age” horror films. That’s a statement that few are going to argue with. Its horrors are more straightforward and more in-you-face than anything else of the time. As a teenager, I managed after a time to get my mother to watch the occasional horror movie — I cannot imagine how or why at this point — and she even came to enjoy some of them. At least she said she did. The notable exception was Island of Lost Souls, and she thought it was one nasty bit of goods. I can’t say that she was wrong, though I think it’s a pretty magnificent nasty bit of goods. I’ve said something like that before and in more than one place, but it bears repeating. This ultra stylish tale of the sadistic Dr. Moreau (Charles Laughton) and his island full of half-human horrors he’s made from animals — not to mention his plans to breed one of them with a shipwreck victim (Richard Arlen) — is just as slick as it is “sick,” and one of the absolute essentials of the first wave of horror movies. The film was screened last summer in a double feature with White Zombie (1932), and for my complete review visit http://www.mountainx.com/movies/review/island_of_lost_souls_white_zombie. reviewed by Ken Hanke The Thursday Horror Picture Show will screen Island of Lost Souls on Thursday, Dec. 1, at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge of The Carolina Asheville and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther.

startsfriday melanCHolia

See review in “Cranky Hanke.”

specialscreenings my nigHt at maud’s JJJJ

DIRECTOR: ERIC ROHMER PLAYERS: JEAN-LOUIS TRINTIGNANT, FRANçOISE FABIAN, MARIE-CHRISTINE BARRAULT, ANTOINE VITEZ drama rated Pg Eric Rohmer is perhaps the least easily accessible of all French New Wave filmmakers. His films are not as stylistically inventive as those of the other filmmakers — in fact, they’re rather staid by comparison — and he’s far less playful. His films are more concerned with ideas and how those ideas attain an internal life of their own. How much he succeeded in creating this internal life is subjective at best. Some find his works very successful, and his probings into ideas, philosophies and morals profound. Others merely find his work rather dull. I’m somewhere in between, but I don’t find this film about a devout Catholic (Jean-Louis Trintignant) and his pursuit of a girl (Marie-Christine Barrault) in the least dull. The film’s centerpiece — his sexless night with Maud (Françoise Fabian) — may go on a little long, but not distressingly so. However, it’s best to know that this is a film about ideas and conversation more than anything else. In other words, it’s not action-packed. In some ways, it might remind you of the recent mumblecore movement in indie film, but with more interesting characters and better photography. reviewed by Ken Hanke Classic World Cinema by Courtyard Gallery will present My Night at Maud’s at 8 p.m. on Friday, Dec. 2, at Phil Mechanic Studios, 109 Roberts St., River Arts District (upstairs in the Railroad Library).

Info: 273-3332, http://www.ashevillecourtyard.com

tHe wrong box JJJJJ

DIRECTOR: BRYAN FORBES PLAYERS: MICHAEL CAINE, RALPH RICHARDSON, JOHN MILLS, PETER COOK, DUDLEY MOORE, PETER SELLERS Comedy rated nr Perhaps no major filmmaker is as completely overlooked today as Bryan Forbes — the handsome actor-writer who turned director in 1961 with Whistle Down the Wind. I’m not sure why, but his name is apt to draw blank looks today. (He’s sufficiently obscure that one of his films — a rather nice documentary from 1973 on Elton John called Say Goodbye, Norma Jean, and Other Things — is generally omitted from both his and John’s filmographies.) That’s too bad, because the best of Forbes is very good indeed — and if you don’t know his work, there’s perhaps no better place to start than The Wrong Box (1966), his dark (but cheerfully so) comedy adapated from the Robert Louis Stevenson-Lloyd Osborne novel. The film more or less follows the plot of the novel about the last surviving members of a tontine battling over who’s the last man standing and, hence, should win the tontine, but with — let’s call it — added dementia and an all-star cast of British actors and comics.

If you don’t know what a tontine is, Ralph Richardson’s prosy old bore Joseph Finsbury (“I state facts only — no opinions — and it fascinates everyone I meet”) explains it several times over the course of the film. Essentially, it’s a kind of lottery with money being held — and invested — for children, with the last surviving child inheriting it all. At the time of the story, that comes down to Joseph and his brother Masterman (John Mills). Joseph has two wards — played by Peter Cook and Dudley Moore — who are after the money.

But Masterman is determined to win it (even to the point of murdering Joseph) so as not to leave his medical student son (Michael Caine) “an idiot in a profession of rogues and charlatans.” The real trouble begins when the two wards become convinced that Joseph has been killed in a train wreck (he hasn’t) and try to hide what they believe is his body.

From there it gets really — and deliciously — complicated. reviewed by Ken Hanke The Asheville Film Society will screen The Wrong Box on Tuesday, Dec. 6, at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge of The Carolina Asheville and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther. Hanke is the artistic director of the A.F.S.

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mountainx.com • NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 73

marketplace realestate

Classified Advertising Sales Team: • Tim Navaille: 828-251-1333 ext.111, tnavaille@mountainx.com • Rick Goldstein: 828-251-1333 ext.123, rgoldstein@mountainx.com • Arenda Manning: 828-251-1333 ext. 138, amanning@mountainx.com

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The FAQs p.74

jobs

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home

improvement

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crossword

About Green Living

Condos For Sale

Real Estate

With Thanksgiving barely past us, the Christmas season chimes in, and that means … lights! While Lake Julian Park starts to dazzle, during its annual Festival of Lights (opens Thursday, Dec. 1), homeowners may want to consider various ways to save energy this holiday season. Here are a few tips:

Heating & Cooling

Homes For Sale “I WILL PAY UP TO

Switch to LEDs: Light Emitting Diodes use up to 95 percent less electricity than traditional lights, they don’t produce heat, and they’re durable. Less electricity means lower costs, no heat means they’re safer than incandescents and durability means that although the fixtures can cost more up front, they’ll last a long time.

$5000 TOWARDS YOUR

1000’s OF ASHEVILLE

CLOSING COSTS!”

HOMES! On our user

...when I act as your

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Buyers agent.

New features include

• Call Bill Byrne:

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(828) 242-4721.

Popular Neighborhood

Landmark Realty.

searches. Check it out at

www.landmarkavl.com

www.townandmountain.com

Go small: Miniature incandescent bulbs generate less heat than full-size ones and use up to 70 percent less energy. Got some old, large Christmas lights? Recycle them, and buy new, smaller bulbs.

2BR COTTAGE IN CENTRAL

NEAR TUNNEL ROAD • Luxury 2 BR, 2BA Unit. Close to Downtown, walking distance to Asheville Mall.

Granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, ceramic/hardwood floors.

Fireplace, deck w/mountain views. Complex has two elevators, pool with hot tub.

Exercise room and well landscaped common area.

Unit priced below last appraisal. (828) 231 - 6689.

ASHEVILLE Sweet, Funky,

Farms

1920’s cottage in Central

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Asheville. 2BR/1BA.

Time it: Whatever your choice in Christmas lighting, invest in a timer that controls when the lights come or turn off. That way, you can avoid burning electricity during peak hours. At the very least, avoid leaving lights on when you’re away from home or after bedtime.

Dog friendly large yard. Nice $299,900 • MOUNTAIN CONTEMPORARY 3BR, 2BA on 3.49 acres.

cul-de-sac neighborhood.

Walk to town. $124,900.

253-9451.

• 5 miles south of Black

Be safe: Hot bulbs can set Christmas trees and flammable decorations on fire; keep your tree watered, make sure extension cords and light sets aren’t near water and — did we mention, switch to LEDs and turn your lights off when you’re not home?

Mountain and I-40. • Private yet convenient.

• Newly remodeled. • Year-round views, wraparound decks.

p.79

WNC Green Building Council www.wncgbc.com

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74

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To Advertise in this Section Call Rick at 828-458-9195 NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 •

mountainx.com

• ROOFING & SIDING • WATERPROOFING

FLOORING • FENCES • ELECTRICAL •

• Luxury homes • HEATING & AIR • PAINTING • REMODELING • KITCHENS & BATHS • LAWN & GARDEN

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Eco-Green Homes •

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AshevilleNCRealty.com

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Condos • Foreclosures.

(828) 215-9064.

GORGEOUS VIEWS AND SECLUSION LESS THAN 20 MIN FROM ASHEVILLE You want to see this cozy home nestled between the hills of Asheville. Visit www.newhomeinasheville.com or call 407-247-1507

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Home Services

for details!

ALMOST HEAVENWNC MTNS-FSBO Breathtaking, long range views of Mt Mitchell and B Ridge Parkway and French Broad. 12 acres 15 min north of Asheville. 399k.

678-974-8047. lclarknyc@yahoo.com.

FSBO • LARGE LOT NORTH ASHEVILLE Beaver Lake, upscale homes, underground utilities, level area. 0.54 acre.

• Huge reduction! $99,900.

Call(828) 649-0548 or (407) 394-5104.

MAYBERRY HEATING AND COOLING Oil and Gas Furnaces • Heat Pumps and AC • Sales • Service • Installation. • Visa • MC • Discover. Call (828) 658-9145.

Painting EXPERIENCED HOUSE PAINTER FOR HIRE Need help with interior painting? I run an affordable one man operation, am reliable, neat, and hospitable.

419-308-1766.

PRESTON PAINTING AND RESTORATION Reliable, detail oriented.

20 years of experience serving designers and homeowners on finish painting, trim carpentry and restoration projects.

Local references and insured. Anthony Preston: (828) 367-1418.

General Services WEDDING & CEREMONY OFFICIANT Services offeredWedding CeremoniesPastoral counselingVow renewals-Commitment Ceremonies- Same Sex Unity Ceremonies.

Please visit my website ashevilleminister4u.com for much more information.~Chaplin Dennis 828.667.5064

Handy Man APPLIANCE ZEN • The best choice for appliance repair in Asheville.

With over 12 years in appliance repair. The choice is easy. Locally owned.

Fast. Friendly. Honest.

• All brands washers, dryers, refrigerator, dishwasher, and small appliances.

• Licensed. Insured. Bonded.

• Sabastian, 828-505-7670. www.appliancezen.com

HIRE A HUSBAND Handyman Services.

31years professional business practices.

Trustworthy, quality results, reliability. $2 million liability insurance. References available. Free estimates.

Stephen Houpis, (828) 280-2254.

RELIABLE REPAIRS! Quality work! All types maintenance/repair, indoor/outdoor. • Excellent water leak detection/correction!

• Wind damaged shingle/ roof repair! 38 years experience! Responsible!

Honest! Cooperative!

References! Call Brad, you’ll be Glad! (828) 273-5271. www.bradshomerepair.com

Services

Computer CHRISTOPHER’S COMPUTERS • Computer Slow? Call Christopher’s Computers at 828-670-9800 and let us help you with PC and Macintosh issues: networking, virus/malware removal, tutoring, upgrades, custom-built new computers, etc.

ChristophersComputers.com

Landscaping BURGESS TREE AND LAWN SERVICE • Rental Property Maintenance • Tree Removal • Tree Pruning • Reliable • Affordable.

Call 280-3601.

Caregivers COMPANION • CAREGIVER • LIVE-IN Alzheimer’s experienced.

• Heart failure and bed sore care. CarePartners Hospice recommended. • Nonsmoker, with cat, seeks live-in position. • References.

• Arnold, (828) 273-2922.

Commercial Listings

Commercial Property

3BR, 1.5BA • WOODFIN Full plumbed basement, Community Shopping zoning, large lot, potential multifamily. Priced below appraisal. Call Cornerstone Real Estate Consultants (828) 319-9651.

DUPLEX • 3BR, 2BA apartment, 1300 ft, 1st floor, no stairs, beautiful, modern 5 year old unit, park like setting. Maple Springs Villas, near Haw Creek.

Sorry, no dogs. $900/month.

828-299 7502.

AWESOME COMMERCIAL POTENTIAL!!!

Property fronts Monticello Road and is located beside I-26 at the overpass bridge at Weaverville. Currently zoned residential, therefore Town of Weaverville must approve your plan.

Cornerstone Real Estate Consultants: (828) 319-9651.

OFFICE SUITES Downtown Asheville.

1-5 office suites from 490 sq. ft. to 3,200 sq. ft.

Modern finishes, elevator, central air. Affordable, full service rates.

G/M Property Group 828-281-4024. jmenk@gmproperty.com

Commercial/ Business Rentals

EAST ASHEVILLE • 2BR, 1BA unfurnished apartments for rent. $610/month.

1/2 off 1st month’s rent.

Please contact Patricia at 828-645-7166.

GREAT NEIGHBORHOOD • Quiet, safe, very convenient location, close to schools, not a large complex, located in Candler off Asbury near Enka Middle school and AB Tech Enka campus. Large, 1200 sqft, with 2 large BR, 1.5BA, W/D hook ups, eat-in kitchen, very large living room, closets. Quiet setting, well kept, new carpet, fresh paint, updated. Long or short term lease. $625/month + utilities. 828-280-0806.

WEST-ACTON WOODS APTS • 2BR, 2BA, 1100 sq.ft. $800/month. Includes water and garbage pickup. Sorry, no pets. Call 253-0758.

Carver Realty.

Mobile Homes For Rent

DOWNTOWN OFFICE SPACE • Historic Miles Building.

280-sq. ft single room. $500/month. Utilities and internet included; access to kitchen and conference room; 6-month lease.

References required.

E-mail inquiries to rental@mountainx.com.

WEST ASHEVILLE • 2BR, 2BA Mobile. W/D connections. On bus line.

Excellent condition. Quiet park. Accepting Section 8.

Only $595/month.

828-252-4334.

Condos/ Townhomes For Rent

Rentals

Apartments For Rent 2BR, 1BA OFF TUNNEL RD. • Easy access to I-240, and along city bus line.

Washer/Dryer hookups, central A/C. Security deposit and 1/2 of first month rent due upon renting. Available immediately. Please contact Patricia at 828-645-7166.

4BR, 1.5 BA WEST ASHEVILLE • Water, garbage included.

On bus line. $769/month.

Call 828-252-9882.

CHARMING STUDIO HISTORIC MONTFORD • Close to UNCA and Downtown. Spacious efficiency with separate sunny kitchen/dining area, big bath, good closet space.

Hardwood floors, new appliances, $675.00/month includes all utilities. Years lease, security deposit, credit check required.

For appt: Graham Investments 828-253-6800.

CONDO NEAR TUNNEL ROAD • Luxury 2BR, 2BA condo on the 4th floor of a new four story building.

Close to downtown and Asheville Mall. Elevators, pool with hot tub, exercise room, fireplace, deck w/ mountain views, granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, ceramic/hardwood floors, etc. $995/ month includes water and gas (828) 231-6689.

Homes For Rent 3BR, 2BA LOG HOME with basement. Hardwood floors, cathedral ceilings.

Easy access. 15 minutes from Weaverville; 25 minutes from Asheville. High speed internet. $985/month.

Call 828-649-1170.

BILTMORE FOREST • 2 or 3 BR, 2BA. Dining room, gas heat and fireplace. Hardwood floors, patio. $1875/month.

828-253-0758.

Carver Realty.

EAST ASHEVILLE HOME FOR RENT Beverly Hills Neighborhood, Sandwiched Within Municipal Golf Course. 1 Story w/ Attached Garage— 1,330 Sq. Ft. Including Sunroom. Wood Floors Throughout, Washer/Dryer, Dishwasher, Garbage Disposal, Monitor and/or Electric Baseboard Heat, Fireplace, Attic Fan. Utilities Renter Responsibility. One Month’s Security Deposit Required—Terms Negotiable.

828.279.6895 Digginupdirt@bellsouth.net

jobs Wanted to Rent 2+ BR WANTED JAN-MAR 2012 ASHEVILLE Month to month furnished 2BR, 1 level rental with mountain views preferred.

Pet friendly a must. Nonsmoker. No stairs best.

Proximity to downtown +/- 10 miles for available activities. Start January 1, 2012. In town 12/7/11 for interviews. Maximum rent $1,350. Ken 317-439-4058.

Employment EAST ASHEVILLE Only 10 minutes to downtown. Nice 3BR, 1.5BA home in Haw Creek.

Hardwood floors, refrigerator, washer and dryer included. $975/month with 1 year lease. (828) 231-9411. jivarner@aol.com MOUNTAIN COTTAGE, 20 MINUTES FROM ASHEVILLE Professionally restored, 3BR/2BA with master suite.

Fireplace and woodstove, large screen porch and deck, over 2000 sq. ft. $1350. Property Management of Asheville.

828-253-2537. sansparrow@charter.net. http://www.propertymanage mentofasheville.com.

General ASPIRING YOUNG ENTREPRENEURS Earn an income you deserve, Company looking for online trainers. Flexible hours, work from home www.2dreambigger.com fp@hatchellburt.com

Administrative/ Office FRONT DESK ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT MACFC Riceville Center, full-time w/benefits. Immediate opening for a “master” at quality internal and external customer service!

This highly organized individual will manage multiple deadlines, while handling the phones and visitors with the highest level of professionalism, courtesy, and dependability. Must be an excellent writer/editor, very comfortable with computer/office systems, an expert with Microsoft office and file/data management. Please visit our website for an application www.macfc.org or send cover letter, resume and application to mfoley@macfc.org

Sales/ Marketing WOULD $500 EXTRA A MONTH MAKE A DIFFERENCE? Looking to help stay-athome moms/dads. PT sales for Dallas environmental company. Call 423-791-5563.

Restaurant/ Food EXPERIENCED LINE COOK For casual fine dining.

Great work environment.

• Diverse, eclectic menu.

• Grill and saute experience required. Apply in person, 2pm-4pm, Monday-Saturday, 337 Merrimon Avenue, Weaverville.

Stoney Knob Cafe.

Medical/ Health Care SEEKING CNA’s for Leicester area. Apply online www.staciespcs.com or call 828-484-8440.

Background check and drug screen required.

Human Services

AVAILABLE POSITIONS • MERIDIAN BEHAVIORAL HEALTH Haywood County: Registered Nurse (RN) Assertive Community Treatment Team (ACTT) Position available within a community-based, multidisciplinary team supporting people in recovery from mental illness and substance abuse.

Psychiatric experience preferred but not required.

Please contact Mason Youell, mason.youell@meridianbhs.org Continued next page

WEST ASHEVILLE 3BR, 2BA, renovated classic bungalow, great neighborhood, fenced back yard, sunroom, garage, walk to West End Bakery, no smokers, pets negotiable, $1200/month, available January 1. 22 Herron St. Call 683-1180.

WEST 2BR, 1BA • Hardwood floors. No pets. $750/month. 828-253-0758.

Carver Realty.

Short-Term Rentals 15 MINUTES TO ASHEVILLE Guest house, vacation/ short term rental. Newly renovated, complete with everything including cable and internet. Weaverville area. • No pets please.

(828) 658-9145. mhcinc58@yahoo.com

mountainx.com

• NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011

75

Qualla Boundary: JJTC Team Seeking Licensed/Provisionally Licensed Therapist on Qualla Boundary for an exciting opportunity to serve Cherokee County: JJTC Team Seeking Licensed/Provisionally

predominately Eastern Band

Licensed Therapist in

of Cherokee Indian court

Cherokee County for an exciting

referred youth and their families

opportunity to serve

through Intensive In-Home

predominately court referred youth and their families through

and Basic Benefit Therapy.

Intensive In-Home and Basic

For more information,

Benefit Therapy. For more

contact Lesa Childers,

information contact Vicki

lesa.childers@meridianbhs.org

Sturtevant,

EDUCATION VOLUNTEER COORDINATOR • Our VOICE is seeking an education volunteer coordinator to recruit, train, and manage volunteers for sexual violence prevention and education presentations to a wide variety of audiences in the community.

Candidate must have BA in social work, education, or a related field. Preferred experience with volunteer and program coordination, public speaking, and knowledge of sexual violence issues. Submit a resume, cover letter and 3 references to rvoice@ourvoicenc.org.

Deadline 12/8/11.

No phone calls please.

FULL-TIME DAY TREATMENT SUPERVISOR IN HAYWOOD COUNTY • Working with adolescents that have mental health/substance abuse diagnoses. LCSW preferred, provisional will be considered. Responsibilities: • Treatment planning • Maintain communication with all parties involved • Provide behavioral interventions • Facilitate team meetings • Completing daily documentation of services provided • Supportive counseling of clients and caregivers. aspireapplicants@yahoo.com

Professional/ Management

THE ASHEVILLE OFFICE OF FAMILY PRESERVATIONS SERVICES • Is seeking an LCSW and QMHP for adult service lines.

Also seeking an LCSW to work with young children and on Intensive Home Team.

Please send resumes to csimpson@fpscorp.com.

Swain County: JJTC Team

THE MEDIATION CENTER

Clinician Assertive Community

Leader Seeking Licensed

• Is hiring a Director of Adult

Treatment Team (ACTT)

Therapist in Swain County

Must have a Master’s degree

for an exciting opportunity to

vicki.sturtevant@meridianbhs.org

and be license-eligible.

serve as team leader; case

Please contact Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org

load is predominately court

Registered Nurse (RN)

referred youth and their families

Assertive Community Treatment

receiving Intensive In-Home

Team (ACTT) Position available

and Basic Benefit Therapy.

within a community-based, multidisciplinary team supporting

For more information

people in recovery from mental

contact Shannon Esco,

illness and substance abuse.

shannon.esco@meridianbhs.org

Psychiatric experience preferred

• For further information and

but not required. Please contact to complete an application,

Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org

visit our website:

Continued next column

www.meridianbhs.org

Stacie’s Personal Care Services

Mediation Services for a

FAMILIES TOGETHER INC. Due to continuous growth in WNC, Families Together, Inc is now hiring licensed professionals and Qualified Professionals in Buncombe, McDowell, Madison, Rutherford, Henderson, and Transylvania Counties.

• Qualified candidates will include • LPC’s, LCSW’s, LMFT’s, LCAS’s, PLCSW’s, or LPCA’s and Bachelor’s and Master’s Qualified Professionals. • FTI provides a positive work environment, flexible hours, room for advancement, health benefits, and an innovative culture.

• www.familiestogether.net • Candidates should email resumes to humanresources@ familiestogether.net

Home Care Is What We Do Openings for CNA’s and RN’s for Nuring Pool in in Buncombe, Madison, Haywood, Yancey, Henderson, Transylvania, Jackson, Mitchell & Swain Counties.

• Weekend and weekday schedules available • Come join our team Stacie’s Personal Care is a drug free workplace

Celebrating Our 6th Year Covering 9 Counties

1-866-550-9290

or apply at: www.staciespcs.com 76

FAMILY PRESERVATION SERVICES OF HENDERSONVILLE, has opportunities for Qualified Mental Health Professionals to join our team. Qualified candidates should have a bachelor’s degree in a social services field and a minimum of 1 year experience with children with mental illness. FPS offers a competitive and comprehensive benefit package. To join our team, please send your resume to jdomansky@fpscorp.com

NOVEMBER 30 - DECEMBER 6, 2011 •

MAKE A DIFFERENCE NC Mentor is offering free informational meetings to those who are interested in becoming therapeutic foster parents. The meetings will be held on the 2nd Tuesday 6:30pm-7:30pm (snacks provided) and 4th Friday 12pm-1pm (lunch provided).

• If you are interested in making a difference in a child’s life, please call Rachel Wingo at (828) 696-2667 ext 15 or e-mail Rachel at rachel.wingo@ thementornetwork.com • Become a Therapeutic Foster Family.

• Free informational meeting.

NC Mentor. 120C Chadwick Square Court, Hendersonville, NC 28739.

QUALIFIED PROFESSIONAL Monarch is now accepting applications for a Full-time Qualified Professional for three sites in Henderson and Rutherford Counties.

• Skills: Ability to develop and implement person centered plans that address clinical needs and life plans for the individuals we serve.

Position is in a residential setting. • Requirements: Must have a four-year college degree. At least two years post baccalaureate experience working with individuals with developmental disabilities.

Ability to work independently, take initiative and make decisions based on sound judgment. Must have a valid NC driver’s license. • Benefits: Competitive salary, major medical insurance and dental coverage, life insurance, paid vacation and holidays, 401(K) Retirement Plan. • Apply: On line www.MonarchNC.org • An Equal Opportunity Employer

mountainx.com

four county area. Please find a job description and application instructions at mediatewnc.org/about/jobs UNIVERSAL MH/DD/SAS is seeking a Psychiatrist to provide 16 hours per week to work on an ACTT (Assertive Community Treatment Team) team for our Asheville location.

Please email Patra at plowe@umhs.net to apply or visit us on the web at www.umhs.net.

UNIVERSAL MH/DD/SAS is seeking Licensed or Provisionally Licensed Therapists to lead our Intensive In Home Team or Community Support Team for our Asheville and Forest City locations. Please email Patra at plowe@umhs.net to apply or visit us on the web at www.umhs.net.

UNIVERSAL MH/DD/SAS is seeking Licensed or Provisionally Licensed Therapists to provide therapy in School and/or office based settings for our Asheville location, Please call Patra at 828-225-4980 ext 302 to apply or visit us on the web at www.umhs.net

CHILDREN FAMILY AND COMMUNITY PARTNERSHIPS DIRECTOR We are a high-performing non-profit organization looking for a seasoned, skilled professional to fill a full-time position as the director of our Children, Family and Community Partnerships Department. The successful Candidate has the high-quality skills, training and experience necessary to: • Use team-based approaches to create, implement, track and report outcomes of short and longrange strategic anti-poverty federal and state-funded initiatives, goals and programs for preschool-aged children and families who live on low income, • Develop and monitor budgets and resources, • Meet and exceed federal and state program performance standards and laws, child care license and other accrediting organizations’ requirements, • Monitor and evaluate program results, • Support and implement agency policy and procedures, • Support a volunteer governing body, • Create new and maintain existing community collaborations and relationships to further the Agency’s mission, • Respectfully supervise professional, content-expert program managers and executive support staff, · Represent the Agency at industry-related activities, • Serve as a collaborative member of the Agency’s Senior Staff and Leadership Teams, • Coordinate work with intra-agency departments to ensure program and agency outcomes are comprehensive, integrated and measurable. The position requires: • Comprehensive knowledge of and demonstrated skill in departmental level federal and state program and grants administration. • Comprehensive knowledge of managing multimillion dollar budgets with a variety of funding sources. • General knowledge of theories, practices and dimensions of early childhood growth and development, special education and family development. • General knowledge of childcare licensing laws.

Continued next column

• General knowledge of Head Start Program standards and other federal and state grant requirements. • High skill level • Respectfully, managing, leading and supervising others with diverse opinions and varied backgrounds, integrating computers, technology and Office Suite applications to conduct and support all aspects of departmental and child/family development activities, analyzing problems and developing creative options, implementing and evaluating solutions, and expressing ideas, concepts and plans effectively, orally and in writing. • Demonstrated ability to organize and implement new and existing programs directly through line staff and indirectly through community collaborations. • Demonstrated ability to establish and maintain effective and respectful working relationships with officials, department heads, staff, community agencies, internal and external customers and the general public. • Demonstrated history of behavior that models the philosophy and practices associated with the Agency’s Principles. Minimum Experience • Graduation from a regionally or CHEA accredited four year college or university with a Masters degree in Public Administration, Public Policy, Public Health or Social Work Administration. • Ten years in a non-profit or local government at a department director or uppermanagement level, administering grant-funded early childhood or similar programs with three years supervisory experience. Preferred Experience • All of the above plus bi-lingual in Spanish. Special Requirements • Must possess a valid North Carolina Driver License. • Must pass a physical examination, criminal background investigation, a physical and a TB Tine Test.

Compensation is $70,000$85,000 DOQ with excellent benefits.This position is exempt under FLSA and ineligible for overtime pay. • Send resume, cover letter and work references with complete contact information to: Ms. Linda Gamble Human Resources Manager 25 Gaston Street,Asheville NC, 28801, (828) 252-2495 or Admin@communityactionopport unities.org Or (828) 253-6319 (Fax) Open until filled. Interviews begin in mid-December, 2011 EOE & DFWP

LICENSED THERAPIST Great opportunity to build a practice with referrals.

Must be experienced with play therapy and working with children and families.

Must be able to bill for Medicaid. Contact Bruce at The Relationship Center, (828) 777-3755.

MEMBERSHIP AND EVENTS COORDINATOR Asheville Art Museum: The Membership and Events Coordinator oversees recruitment and retention of Members, donors and event volunteers, coordinates events, and manages the Member and Donor database, related correspondence and assists the development department.

Eligible applicants must demonstrate knowledge of database management, necessary word processing skills, attention to detail and confidence in adapting to new software quickly.

• Additional requirements: 2 + years of relevant experience and an appropriate degree.

• Full-time position with benefits. Send resume, cover letter, salary history and references to the Asheville Art Museum, P.O. Box 1717, Asheville, NC 28802 or kglass@ashevilleart.org • Deadline to apply is December 12, 2011.

QUALITY IMPROVEMENT DIRECTOR FOR COMMUNITY CARE OF WNC Community Care of Western North Carolina is looking for a full-time Quality Improvement Director to work out of the main office in Asheville. This position will be responsible for the integration of QI among all departments and programs across our network. The Quality Improvement Director will have oversight of the QI team and associated positions. The ideal candidate would possess a Master’s degree in Health Care Administration, Public Health or a related field, or be an RN with at least 5 years of clinical nursing experience, BSN preferred.

At least 3 years of quality assurance or healthcare management experience required. Data analysis skills, proficiency in Microsoft Excel and Access, and population health management experience also required. Submit resume to hr@ccwnc.org or fax to 828-259-3875.

Computer/ Technical PREPRESS/DATA TECHNICIAN Positions open at MMS, a progressive printing, mailing and marketing services provider in Asheville.

We’re looking for highly motivated individuals with planning and problem solving skills, as well as the ability to manage multiple projects in a fast paced environment to join our team. Professional print industry experience preferred. Must be self motivated, and proficient with all Adobe and Microsoft Office programs. Full time position with benefits package. Email resume to cindy@mmsdelivers.com

Teaching/ Education PROGRAM COORDINATOR • In Real Life, a program of the Asheville City Schools Foundation is seeking a Program Coordinator.

For more information visit our website: www.acsf.org

Announcements

Pet Xchange

Pets for Adoption

THE JAZZ SALON CELEBRATE THE HOLIDAYS WITH LIVE JAZZ AT YOUR HOME OR BUSINESS. The Jazz Salon features Steinway Artist, pianist Michael Jefry Stevens in solo, duo, trio, quartet or large ensemble format.

Celebrate the holiday season with your favorite tunes from the 30’s and 40’s. mjsjazz@mac.com

Trucks/ Vans/SUVs

If you want a sweet, relaxed, loving dog, then Honey is your girl. She likes to play and snuggle and is a real go-with-the-flow kind of dog. She seems to get along with just about anyone and invites any opportunity to love and to be loved. Stop

by Animal Compassion Network’s store for rescued pets, Pet Harmony located at 803 Fairview Street, Asheville, North Carolina 28803 to shop for all your pet supplies.

VOCALIST NEEDED Need simple backing vocal - $150.00 flat fee for session. Will pay gas, food, and other expenses.

828-775-6468. ivoryjc@gmail.com.

Adult

Antiques &

Yard Sales

A PERSONAL TOUCH

Collectibles

MOVING SALE

napper-supreme. She is very

ORNAMENTS

mellow and laid back. If you

In original boxes, like new.

want to relax on the couch

From 1979-2007.

and cuddle up with Pretty,

Call June at 254-2415.

she’s waiting for you. Stop

Jewelry

SERVICE BUSINESS!

Network’s store for rescued

1998 FORD ECONOLINE V-8

pets, Pet Harmony located

CARGO VAN in excellent

at 803 Fairview Street,

condition. Just had major

Asheville, North Carolina

tune-up, 3 new coils, like-

White gold. Round brilliant

new tires, reupholstered front

cut, .330 carat. Appraisal

seat and full inspection by

papers available.

local mechanic. Hate to part

Approximate ring size 6-7.

pet supplies.

Pet Services

with this but I need a smaller

ASHEVILLE PET SITTERS

offer or straight trade for

Dependable, loving care

smaller car. This cargo van

Call Sandy Ochsenreiter, Pickles is the sweetest, most loving, playful Terrier Mix you will meet. She was turned into the shelter with her collar embedded into her neck to where she needed stitches to close the gaping wound left behind. Despite her mistreatment, she couldn’t be any more sweet.

Don’t miss your chance to meet this girl today! Stop

by Animal Compassion Network’s store for rescued pets, Pet Harmony located at 803 Fairview Street, Asheville, North Carolina 28803 to shop for all your pet supplies.

PERFECT VAN FOR ANY

by Animal Compassion

28803 to shop for all your

(828) 215-7232.

COMMUNITY PARTNERSHIP

car. Asking $1,500 or best

CUSTOM 14KT SOLITAIRE DIAMOND RING

• $500 firm.

Local inquires only: magicottage@yahoo.com

drives great and is perfect for anyone who needs a tons of space for equipment and/or supplies. Has 180,588

Tools & Machinery

vouchers. 1st and 3rd

miles but it totally rebuilt and drives like new. Call 828458-9195 as this will go fast!

Automotive Services

Saturday of each month 123PM at Blue Ridge Mall, Four Seasons Blvd., Hendersonville (at the Kmart entrance). • 4th Saturday of each month 10AM

appointment. 713-9901.

BobCAT 2002

• Honda and Acura repair.

Only 1507 hours.

Half price repair and service.

773-G Series, Skid Steer

Located in the Weaverville

tracks over tires, wood splitter 48’, Brush Bandit

- 2PM at Tractor Supply, Four

area. Please call

Seasons Blvd., Hendersonville.

828-275-6063 for

bush hog. $15,000 Please

828-693-5172.

appointment.

call 828- 551-4156

A WOMAN’S TOUCH

THE ASHEVILLE PEACE WREATH • $55 ($5 of each sale will be donated to Helpmate).

Charm’s Floral of Asheville!

828-424-1463. www.charmsfloral.com www.flowershopasheville.com

household goods including

WAREHOUSE ESTATE SALE Building equipment, restaurant equipment household furniture front entrance. 82 Lexington Avenue back entrance.

Chicken Alley. Saturday, December 10 - Sunday, December 11 8am-4pm.

Tons of great stuff, some antiques.

216-1221, 713-1466.

139 Lynn Cove Rd.

your appointment.

North Asheville.

(828) 275-4443.

Wanted

WE’LL FIX IT AUTOMOTIVE

ASE and factory certified.

relocating. Personal and

YARD SALE Yard Sale - Dec 3rd 8AM til 4PM NO Early Birds PLEASE. Behind Clothes Encounters in the parking lot at 340 Merrimon Ave. Across from Merrimon Florist.

FOR PETS • Free or low cost spay/neuter information and

• Call now to book your

• Prominent Asheville artist HALLMARK CHRISTMAS

while you’re away.

Musicians’ Xchange

ONE WORLD MEDIA STUDIO • Music and Video roduction • In Studio • Live Venue • HD Video • HQ Audio. Call (828) 335-9316.

On the web: 1worldmediastudio.com

Sales

cat - sweet, loving and a

Reasonable rates.

Musical Services

General Merchandise

For Sale

Pretty is the ultimate lap

ADOPTION: Loving, educated couple hopes to adopt a baby. We promise a lifetime of love and opportunity for a baby. Expenses paid. Lori and Mike: 1-888-499-4464. www.TeachAndDoc.com GAIA CONCEPTIONS ECO CHIC APPAREL FOR THE URBAN NOMAD We specialize in custom sustainable clothing created with local organic cotton, hemp, and wool that can be found at gaiaconceptions.com

Automotive

CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid.

We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888-420-3808 www.cash4car.com

mountainx.com

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The New York Times Crossword Edited by Will Shortz No.1026 Across 1 Hanging open 6 Cousin of an ax 10 Near Eastern V.I.P.’s 14 Doesn’t have a second to lose?

15 Boutique fixture 17 Exhibited perfect braking 19 Native Nebraskan 20 Followers of nus 21 “For me? You shouldn’t have …”

22 Nicest room on a ship, probably 27 Toward the back 28 E.T.A.’s for redeyes 29 Here, to Henri 32 Foofaraw 35 Aloe additive?

37 “Heavens to Betsy!”

38 Cashier’s error, as suggested by 17-, 22-, 47- and 58-Across?

41 Henry who made a Fortune?

42 Baby taking a bow?

43 Befuddled 44 Baton Rouge sch.

45 Peace grp. since 1948 46 “___ loves me …”

47 Certain loaf 54 Frigidaire competitor 56 Bumbler 57 Réunion, e.g.

58 Being frugal 63 Strongly praised 64 Goose bumpsproducing, maybe 65 Funnywoman Martha

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE U S S C U A R M S P S

RI E O P N EI C A T

M A M P B H O I

P B EI A I N N

A

C D S U HI

A R W N N A

I P C A I N C D A L E

S L N A A N T S

A S A PI S

M AM M A C A S R TI E N E C E T S L S EI T E L A S A WM H P W R SI O E A R R E A A P T R EM

B H L U E S H A I LI O O H R N M O S L O G B H TI B H A S E E A T T R H S R B O A O L A M E E H N TI D T N A R A T T H O U S H H E E R T E R E E A E A D B L U E I N S K D A F E E S S L Y E

A M E L O TI O E

TI A N L F E U T N U T

H N E F N E A R U E D E LI G H B S A O R W G O R

G S A R P O H S O E U M E P S U N A D S G O P U R V T TI E E N U C S A T R T W S N

S R TI A S L

H E O N S U E F

A D N S T L

B TI H S R S O A E U

A D L O T N E U R T S

G O L U A S D T E S S

S H A Y

66 Actress Naldi of the silents 67 Kickoff

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Down 1 N.A.A.C.P. part: Abbr.

2 Must, slangily 3 Something to be thrown for 4 Top 40 fare 5 Medium capacity?

6 Contribute to the mix 7 Impurity 8 Eastern state?

9 That, in Tijuana 10 “___ there yet?”

11 Handy IDs in the hood?

12 Unwanted spots 13 Kind of terrier 16 Slows down traffic, say?

18 Sign by stairs, often 23 1,000-foot-deep lake that straddles a state line 24 Many miles away 25 Game with a maximum score of 180 26 Apple offering 30 Zoo keeper?

31 Noodle product?

32 Over the ___ 33 Burden 34 Number of people in a room 35 Numbered thing in the Bible 36 Friendly introduction?

HOME IMPROVEMENT 17 SECTION 19

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presents

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CALL RICK AT

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Puzzle by C.W. Stewart

37 Faster’s opposite 39 Bring in 40 “Yeah, right” 45 Gerald Ford’s birthplace 46 Muslim mystic 48 Theodore Roosevelt, to Eleanor 49 Man of many words?

50 Press conference component, briefly 51 Arena sections 52 Carl’s wife in “Up” 53 Bowling alley button 54 On ___ with (equal to) 55 Sheet mineral

59 “There is no ___ team” 60 Name placeholder in govt. records 61 Many a Fortune profilee, for short 62 “Jeopardy!” whiz Jennings

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.49 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554.

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