Charlotte Parent Charlotte May 2019

May 2019 • Free

Surviving

Baby’s First Year YOU GOT THIS!

Birthday Bonanza!

Plan a bash on the farm

141 +

WAYS TO PLAY IN MAY OUTDOOR MOVIES

ESCAPE THE ROUTINE AT

Ocracoke Island 1

charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

Moms are expected to listen to everyone.

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From wellness and well-woman care to birth and parenting, we’re here with in-house midwife and physician teams who will honor your choices every step of the way.

Schedule your appointment or birth center tour at BabyandCompany.com.

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CARING

STRONG

HEALTHY

Care for every part of motherhood Novant Health offers unrivaled care for every stage of your maternity journey.

We know the care you need today might not be the same care you need tomorrow, and we’re proud to offer expert care that grows with you and your family.

So whether it’s your first baby or your fifth, you can count on Novant Health to treat you like it’s the first time each and every time.

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SUPPORTED

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CONTENT › M AY 2 0 1 9

14

Surviving Baby’s First Year Expert advice on making choices in that first year of parenting

16

Bringing Home Baby How a postpartum doula can help smooth the transition

18

The ABCs of Active Reading Connect a toddler’s world to books for a lifelong love of reading

20

Party on a Farm Get down on the farm for the next birthday celebration

22

Birthday Parties That Give Back Start a new tradition with a charitable birthday bash

14 Photo by Peter Zay

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IN EVERY ISSUE 4

Editor’s Letter

7

FYI

10 Growing Up 12 Thrive 13 Families Managing Media

24

24 Excursion 32 Daddy Derek

CALENDAR 25 Our Picks 27 Daily Calendar 28 Outdoor Movies and Concerts 30 On Stage

25 charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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EDITOR’S NOTE

Playing Birthday Party Planner morrismedianetwork.com

W

hen I sent out the Evite, I didn’t really expect everyone to respond yes.

I stand by my more-the-merrier philosophy, but as the RSVPs for yes kept coming for my youngest son’s birthday party at our house, I felt panic creep in. In addition to family, friends and a few neighbors, we invited his entire day care class. That’s

EDITOR Michele Huggins

ART DIRECTOR Melissa Stutts

GENERAL MANAGER Allison Hollins • allison.hollins@morris.com

DIGITAL CONTENT DIRECTOR Andy Smith • andy.smith@morris.com

MEDIA CONSULTANTS Fawn Anderson • fawn.anderson@morris.com Kathy Thompson • kathy.thompson@morris.com

14 3-year-olds. My husband stayed cool and calm while I quietly prayed for sunshine and pondered how to run chaos control.

We went with a superhero theme. I ordered superhero capes for all the kids to wear and take home as their parting gifts. Thanks to my husband, there is an awesome treehouse in the backyard that few children can resist, and we have a play set with swings and a slide. Still it didn’t seem like enough. I queried our neighborhood Facebook group and was thrilled to find a momma who had a small bounce house that I could borrow on party day. The panic subsided.

On party day, the sun shined. The superhero capes, treehouse and bounce house were ample entertainment, and cake and snacks were enjoyed by all. It was a great afternoon and an opportunity for me to chat with the parents of the kids my son spends time with (lots of time) each week. There was clean-up before and after of course, but seeing the kids have a great time made it worth the effort.

Birthday parties aren’t the simple soirees that they once were. If you’re not into hosting at your house, Charlotte has a plethora of party venues from which to choose, including farms. If you have an animal or nature lover in your brood,

ADVERTISING SALES COORDINATOR Julianne Clune • julianne.clune@morris.com

MORRIS MEDIA NETWORK DIRECTOR OF MANUFACTURING Donald Horton

DIRECTOR OF PUBLISHING SERVICES Karen Fralick

PRODUCTION COORDINATOR Cher Wheeler

CONTACT US charlotteparent.com 214 W. Tremont Ave., Suite 302, Charlotte, NC 28203 phone: 704-344-1980 • fax: 704-344-1983 email: info@charlotteparent.com advertising@charlotteparent.com Circulation 35,000. Distribution of this magazine does not constitute an endorsement of information, products or services. Charlotte Parent reserves the right to reject any advertisement or listing that is not in keeping with the publication’s standards. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission is prohibited.

a party on the farm is something to consider, especially since there are so many farms on the outskirts of town. Read the feature on page 20 for more on that.

We also offer ideas for creating a tradition with a charitable birthday bash in the feature “Parties That Give Back” on page 22.

May 12 is Mother’s Day. Cheers to all the mommas out there working hard to nurture the little humans that we love so much. Take some time for you this month. We have a couple ideas on how to have some fun on page 7.

HAVE IDEAS TO SHARE? Email editor@charlotteparent.com.

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A Publication of the Visitor Publications Division of Morris Communications Company, L.L.C. 725 Broad St., Augusta, GA 30901 Chairman President & CEO William S. Morris III William S. Morris IV

Best Bets From where to pick strawberries to top places to ride bikes with the kids, our editors dive into the best of the best in the city and bring you firsthand accounts.

.../blogs

s t Be

There’s a reason for all this sneezin.’

Carolina Asthma & Allergy Center has the only pollen counter in the Charlotte region.

We post daily counts on our website as a public service from February to November.

The Digital Issue Connect to Charlotte Parent when you are on the go with the magazine’s tablet edition available via magzter. com. It’s free with a quick sign-up. magzter.com.

If you suffer from seasonal allergy symptoms year after year, our board-certified allergists can test you to discover exactly what you are allergic to, create a customized treatment plan that over time can lessen the severity of your allergies, and, in many cases, cure your allergies altogether!

Call 704.372.7900 to schedule an appointment at one of our area office locations.

Summer Camps The end of another school year is just around the corner. If you still have gaps to fill in the summer calendar, check out our summer camps directory for camp ideas that suit all interests, from artist to explorer.

Pollen and Mold Levels

Pollen counts updated daily from Feb 15 - Nov. 15.

(Chart above is for illustrative purposes only.)

…/camps

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Discover your capable, confident Montessori child.

Visit us online to RSVP for one of our upcoming events or to book a tour.

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4/15/19 12:12 PM

See the Charlotte Dragon Boat Race at the Charlotte Asian Festival May 18 at Ramsey Creek Park. Photo by Andy Chen/Indigo Photography

May Events Made for Moms Mother’s Day is May 12. Of course all mothers cherish the handmade cards with handprints, but for all the “mothering” that you do, take some time for you. Here a couple ideas for making a date with other mom friends.

Celebrate Culture at Charlotte Asian Festival Celebrate the diversity of Asian culture in Charlotte at the Charlotte Dragon Boat Race and Asian Festival, happening May 18 at Ramsey Creek Park in Cornelius. Special features include a parade of nations, country cultural booths with games and activities, martial-arts demonstrations, performances in music and dance, plus crafts and traditional games, and, of course, the Charlotte Dragon Boat Race.

Dragon Boat racing, which originated in China more than 2,000 years ago, has evolved into one of the most popular sporting events in many countries of the world, and promotes competition, fair play, and team and community building. Teams in the race are comprised of Fortune 500 companies, nonprofit organizations, colleges and high schools, civic groups and breast-cancer survivor teams.

There is also an array of spicy, sweet and savory Asian cuisines to try at the festival. From Filipino adobo and Korean bulgogi to Vietnamese pho noodle soups, the festival offers an opportunity to sample and savor flavors from throughout Asia. The day kicks off with the Charlotte Dragon Boat Race at 9 a.m., cultural booths and food vendors open at 10:30 a.m. Admission is free. Complimentary parking is available at North Pointe Executive Park with frequent shuttle buses to the park. Find more information at charlotteasianfestival.com.

Children and Screens: Causes and Cures for Digital Addiction Dr. Richard Freed, a child and adolescent psychologist and author of the book “Wired Child: Reclaiming Childhood in a Digital Age,” joins other medical experts from around the country at the conference “Children and Screens: Causes and Cures for Addiction” hosted by Families Managing Media. The conference addresses how screens are impacting children and how to help curb the cravings. Topics include internet gaming disorder and media violence, the pediatric brain and media addiction, and mental health effects of social media and gaming.

The conference is divided into two events with a ticketed preview night that features brief talks from three experts, followed by a question-and-answer session, happening May 16, 7-9 p.m. at Pineville United Methodist Church. The main event takes place May 17, 8 a.m.-5 p.m., at the Sheraton Charlotte Hotel in uptown Charlotte. Medical professionals, doctors, nurses, counselors, teachers, youth workers, and anyone who influences children are invited to attend. Tickets to the preview night are $10 and can be purchased at kidsandscreens.eventbrite.com. Tickets for the fullday conference are $175, and can be purchased at charlotteahec.org/digitaladdiction.

What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood. For all the good days, there are days in the trenches, from potty accidents to sleep training. Amy Wilson, who kicked off her one-woman funny show “Mother Load” at Blumenthal Performing Arts Center Stage Door Theatre returns with her What Fresh Hell podcast partner and writer Margaret Ables. The duo, who each have three kids, bring their comedy routine What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood Live! about all things motherhood to Booth Playhouse, May 9. Tickets start at $24.50. blumenthalarts.org.

Mother’s Day Sip and Shop at 7th Street Market. Gather your besties and head uptown to shop May 10 from 4:30 to 9 p.m. at this pop-up filled with local vendors.

The first 100 people get a complimentary glass of sparkling wine.

Stick around and have dinner at one of the market’s restaurants and then go explore the Charlotte Shout events at First Ward Park.

charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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› sound

beginnings

a program of Charlotte Speech and Hearing Center, Inc.

Life ready.

With a Sound Beginning, anything is possible!

FYI

Gear Up for End of Grade Tests Each May, students at North Carolina Public Schools in grades three to eight take End of Grade (EOG) tests. For some kids, EOGs are no biggie, for others it causes stress and anxiety. Try these things to help calm your child’s nerves and prepare for testing days.

1. Remind your child to carefully and slowing read the question and read it again before hastily answering the question so he is sure he understands what is being asked. Remember, questions can be tricky.

2. Most EOG tests are multiple choice, so the answer is there. Look for key words in the question to choose the best answer.

3. Take your time. Don’t go too fast. Take your time. Breath.

It’s not a race. Scan the answers, then go back and review questions and answers before turning in the test.

If your child tends to chew on pencils or pens to relieve stress, anxiety and to focus in the classroom, consider Chewelry. Chewelry is a line of nontoxic, chewable necklaces and bracelets that provide a stylish, functional and discreet way for kids to minimize anxiety and stress in the classroom by fidgeting with them or safely chewing on them. Find chewelry at pattiandricky.com.

Free SPOTme Skin Checks Skin cancer is the most common cancer in the United States, with nearly 9,500 people diagnosed daily, and the AAD recommends that everyone, not just those who are high risk, schedule an annual skin check with a board-certified dermatologist. As part of Skin Cancer Awareness Month, Sona Dermatology, in partnership with the American Academy of Dermatology is offering free “SPOTme” skin checks two days in May. SPOTme skin checks are available through Sona Dermatology’s board-certified dermatologists at its Ballantyne location, May 6 from 11 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.; and at its Huntersville/ Lake Norman location, May 6 from 8:30 to 11 a.m., and May 18 from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. No payment or insurance is required, but register in advance to ensure an appointment, which will be scheduled on a first-come, first-served basis. Get more information at sonaskin.com.

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FYI | people

Best advice ever received: The best advice I ever received is that time is a currency that you can’t earn more of, so spend it wisely at work and at home. You can’t get it back so be smart about how you use it.

Proudest parenting moment: There are so many, it’s hard to pick one, but I can tell you that when I see my child do some random act of kindness that’s not provoked — when you just see your child do something out of pure goodness — it makes me really proud.

Lowest parenting moment: When I have to miss something because I’m a working mom.

Someone once said to me, you can have it all but just not all in the same day. I remind myself of that when I have to miss something.

Kim Henderson with her daughter Evelyn Megan.

Photo by Daniel Coston Photography

Get to Know: Kim Henderson

BY MICHELE HUGGINS

K

im Henderson is the chief of staff to the CEO at Novant Health. She is also mom to her 10-year-old daughter Evelyn Megan McLoughlin.

Where in Charlotte do you live? Where did you grow up? We live in Myers Park. I am from Livonia, Michigan. A job brought me to Charlotte 18 years ago.

Tell us about your job. What do you like and what are the challenges? I work in an industry that’s open 365 days, 24 hours, seven days a week that is fast paced and demanding with a lot that needs to be accomplished. As the chief of staff to the CEO, I serve as extension of the CEO, which allows him to accomplish more and maximize the hours in a day. The best part of the job is that no two days are the same. I work with doctors, internal and external stakeholders, and community leaders. Most important, I believe in our mission to help people get remarkable

health care that they deserve. I truly enjoy the role I play at Novant.

As for the biggest challenge, there is no regular schedule. Tomorrow I may start my day at 7 a.m., and the next three days I may be out until 10 p.m. at meetings. The role also requires a lot of weekend work.

It’s a nontraditional job that is very time consuming. It’s a balancing act and there are only so many hours in the day.

What’s the hardest part of juggling family and work life? I’m very fortunate that I work for a CEO that allows me flexibility to be good at both. He’s a role model for putting family first. He recognizes that my daughter comes first, and on numerous occasions he has allowed me to be with my daughter for special occasions.

What is your favorite thing about raising a family in Charlotte? All the culture Charlotte offers. The exposure to sporting events, art, and theater events is great. We go to Hornets and Checkers games, plays at Blumenthal [Performing Arts Center] and the Children’s Theatre of Charlotte. We love to go to it all.

What are three things you can’t live without?

1. Peanut M&Ms 2. Facebook 3. Lots of adventure and things that you create memories around.

Favorite Instagram account: @jennifer. garner. She posts real stuff about her kids and life, stuff that we all deal with everyday raising kids when they go through different phases.

Last book read: “How to Catch a Unicorn,”

by Adam Wallace. It’s a New York Times bestseller.

What inspires you? A good challenge. It’s one reason I love coming to work everyday.

A challenge is what motivates me. That’s why adventure personally motivates me.

Michele Huggins is editor of Charlotte Parent. charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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GROWING UP discomfort, and even through our feelings starts in childhood,” Faizi says.

Instead of offering immediate solutions to children’s minor complaints, practice listening to and validating feelings. Then ask kids to tune into their own needs.

“Encouraging children to listen to their hunger cues, but also their ‘getting full’ cues is helpful and goes a long way at preventing overeating,” Faizi says.

Take a similar approach to offering breaks from homework or exercise. Prompt children to recognize their body’s cues when feeling tired or needing a break. If they do, let them rest for a few moments until they feel ready to resume their activity.

TEEN YEARS

Self-Care Savvy

Helping children with activities of daily life

BY MALIA JACOBSON

W

hen it comes to selfies, your child may be a pro. But what about self-care? Also called activities of daily living, self-care skills are everyday tasks that get kids ready for life like eating, washing and dressing. But self-care can also mean dialing back stress, getting more rest, practicing mindfulness and increasing joy. Whether your child is a toddler, a teenager or somewhere in between, age-appropriate self-care is an important way to promote independence, says licensed educational psychologist, guidance counselor and author Reena B. Patel of San Diego, California. Here’s how to foster life skills that get kids ready to grow, age by age.

EARLY YEARS

Brushing up Amid the morning rush, it may seem easier to rush your tot through self-care tasks or do the tasks for them. Though toddlers and preschoolers may show interest in personal care tasks, they still need supervision and help from caregivers for tasks like handwashing, bathing, teeth-brushing and wiping after using the toilet until age 5 or so, says pediatrician Adam Faizi of Atrium Health Levine Children’s Charlotte Pediatric Clinic – SouthPark.

“Giving children a chance to practice self-care skills is an important part of learning, and builds autonomy and responsibility,” Patel says. Self-care practice can help young children feel a sense of accomplishment that boosts their budding self-esteem, which is mostly developed before age 5, according to a study

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from the University of Washington. Toddlers and preschoolers can practice choosing their own clothing, dressing themselves, setting and clearing their place settings for meals, brushing their hair, and caring for belongings by putting them away.

ELEMENTARY YEARS

Understanding Signals By grade school, children have learned, if not mastered, the basic skills needed to care for their bodies, like washing, grooming and dressing themselves, but what about caring for their mind, spirit and emotions? Caregivers can encourage growth by helping children learn to listen to themselves, starting with their body’s daily signals.

“Learning what our body is telling us through signals and cues, through pain and

Rest Counts Too many teens skimp on sleep, a self-care essential. Per the National Sleep Foundation, 87 percent of teens get less than the recommended 8.5 hours of sleep per night.

Helping teens develop better sleep hygiene (or sleep habits) can boost their mental health, physical wellbeing and academic performance.

Teenagers’ schedules, however, often leave too little time for sleep. Caregivers can help teens cut back on overscheduling and carefully choose their commitments, Patel says.

“Have teens ask themselves ‘Am I enjoying it, do I look forward to the activity, and am I gaining something from it?’ ” A regular family check-in creates an opportunity for both connection and selfreflection, giving teens a chance to pause and consider whether they’re overcommitted or need more rest, Faizi says. “Do a ‘FANO’ checkin. Each family member can discuss a prevalent Feeling, Affirm another person in the family, express a Need, including a need for rest, and Own or take responsibility for something they haven’t done well enough.”

While you’re at it, be sure to get your sleep. Modeling healthy self-care should be a parents’ top priority, Faizi says. “If something isn’t modeled by caregivers, it won’t be important to teens.”

Malia Jacobson is an award-winning health and parenting journalist and mom of three.

Every day, more than 32,000 people choose us for their healthcare. From the region’s most advanced heart program and cancer institute to a nationally ranked children’s hospital, we remain strong in our commitment – not just to delivering better care, but to delivering the best care. For all.

FOR THE CAROLINAS AtriumHealth.org

›

THRIVE an important and valuable member of our family.

Jacob Moise, 4, and Abby Moise, 3, enjoying a moment in front of the camera together. Courtesy of Bea Moise

‘Sib’ Love

Finding balance and fairness for siblings of kids with special needs

BY BEA MOISE

A

t the age of 4, my daughter Abigail, who prefers to go by Abby, started to realize that her brother Jacob was different. In our home, we speak freely about how our family is different, and this open communication directly impacts Abby as a sibling of a child with special needs. We make sure to pay attention to her unique talents and personality, and allow her to be upset with her brother and how her life is different from others. We as a family support and celebrate the big and little accomplishments that she achieves.

Finding Fairness The idea of treating Abby and Jacob equitably is a constant struggle. The reality is they aren’t capable of doing the same things, however, it’s essential that we as parents don’t put the pressure only on Abby to have household responsibilities. Perfection is never the goal, but participation is. Jacob is responsible for opening all the blinds and curtains throughout the household in the morning, while Abby makes her bed before leaving for school. She doesn’t question why Jacob doesn’t make his bed, but is happy knowing that he has a job,

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which is to open her blinds and curtains.

For Abby, this seems fair.

One-on-One Time Jacob has a team of professionals — a small village — that are dedicated to him, and I am the person that takes him to the appointments. Abby sees these visits additional time for Jacob with just Mommy. To keep things feeling fair, my husband and I have designated one-on-one time with Abby. This time is not meant to accomplish or solve any particular issue. It simply is time shared with her, and to let her know that she is

The Gift of Compassion From the moment we discovered that Jacob as on the autism spectrum, I felt sad for my daughter. I felt sorry for her, I felt guilty and like she would be deprived of a typical childhood. I thought that having an autistic brother would mean that she would not have a brother with the ability to look after her, take care of her or stand up for her. They wouldn’t have a typical type of relationship playing together.

I presumed Jacob wouldn’t be capable of having the bond that my brother and I have. He would not be proficient at teasing her, protecting her or being understanding to her.

In the midst of all these worries, I neglected to think about what he would provide. One Sunday afternoon on a beautiful blue-sky afternoon, I sat inside watching a television show. As I gazed out the window to our backyard, I saw Abby and Jacob playing. At that moment, all I saw was two kids playing; not one autistic child and his sister, just two kids.

As I watched without their knowledge, I saw my daughter helping her big brother climb the slide, encouraging him. I saw my 4-year-old demonstrating a level of care and understanding that most adults do not possess. I saw her being patient and kind, but mostly I saw her being the sister that my son needs, the daughter that I want, and a child becoming person that we can all strive to be.

When Abby and Jacob play, it’s like a beautiful dance that has been practiced for years. I am amazed by how coordinated their interaction is. It doesn’t require any outside intervention. Trying to dictate how they play only interrupts this well-choreographed dance.

Bea Moise is a board-certified cognitive specialist, parenting coach and founder of the company A Child Like Mine. She and her husband have two children, Jacob and Abigail.

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FAMILIES MANAGING MEDIA interaction and it meets one of a child’s most basic needs. By the time a child is 12 to 18 months of age, these patterns of attachment with parents become the lifelong foundation needed to experience relationships.

Touch: Physical touch, hugs and roughand-tumble play build healthy brain development. Tactile stimulation activates the parasympathetic system, which lowers stress and anxiety in our kids.

Movement: Exploring the environment is also crucial for early brain development.

Babies learn information about their world by crawling, touching everything and putting things in their mouth — for better or worse. Young children require two to three hours per day of active play

Disconnect the Digital Babysitter Trade the device for face-to-face time, touch and movement

I

Toddler Minds and Screens “My baby is so smart. Look, she can work an app on my tablet.” Did you know that your cat can, too? There is a fishing app designed to keep a cat’s attention. The brain-orienting response is a reflex action necessary for survival, so it’s important to not confuse your child’s instinctive reaction to movement on a screen with brilliance.

During the first two years of life

Toddlers and older kids have healthier brain connections when they are moving and getting exercise.

Your presence, time and focus

BY MELANIE HEMPE nteractive screens, while entertaining for sure, do not lead to healthy brain development and smarter babies.

Recent research by the National Institutes of Health gives reason to hit the pause button and look at the science first before adding another “educational” app to your tablet or phone for young kids.

to achieve adequate sensory stimulation.

are what your baby needs more than a your child’s brain doubles in size. Every neuron in a child’s brain develops best in secure human relationships where language can be experienced, eye contact can be sustained and roughand-tumble play can pave neuronal pathways. Screen overuse in the early years can cause lopsided brain development through overstimulation and by replacing additional foundational activities like unstructured play, music, social skills and language development.

Swap the screen time for people time that includes: Attachment: Attachment is one of the most important early biological and developmental tasks. Attachment disorders can result when excessive screen use replaces human connection.

It is the process of intentional emotional

distraction device. No one can argue the benefits of technology in today’s world, but over attachment to these devices, especially in the early years, may result in a disconnection from real life. Resist the screen as a babysitter and focus on faceto-face time, lots of spoken words, exercise and hugs to create essential pathways that can serve your child well for the rest of his life. Your child is only young once and needs you more than a screen.

Melanie Hempe is the founder of Families Managing Media, a nonprofit organization dedicated to helping families reduce screen overuse. She also has a nursing degree, and is mom to four children. Find more resources at familiesmanagingmedia.com. charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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Surviving Baby’s First Year Navigating the early choices with confidence

BY TANYA WARD GOODMAN Caring for a child has a lot to do with gathering knowledge, but just as much with trusting your instincts. The choices, however, can be overwhelming and the decision process is often complicated by the views and opinions of others.

“The first few weeks of life is a needy time, it’s a confusing time,” says Dr. Jeffrey Cleveland, a pediatrician at Atrium Health Levine Children’s Charlotte Pediatric Clinic.

“A parent’s confidence in their ability to take care of their child is critical.”

Here’s a roundup of the difficult decisions faced by new parents and some input from local experts.

BIRTH SETTING Caring for the child begins with caring for the mother. Setting is of critical importance to any story, including your birth story.

Whatever option you choose, it’s important to feel comfortable and protected.

“Pregnancy and childbirth is an incredible life transition with all these variables,” says Margaret Buxton, regional director of clinical operations at Baby+Co. and lead midwife at the birth center’s Nashville branch. As a passionate advocate of the birthcenter model of care, Buxton understands the value of knowledge, preparation and flexibility.

“The environment sends you a message,” Buxton says. “If a woman does not feel safe in her birth environment, her cortisol and adrenaline kick in,” which can slow down labor. A labor in a birth center may be allowed to progress with minimal interruptions. There are no routine IVs, no inductions and no fetal monitoring unless warranted by the situation. She’s quick to point out that the advantages of a hospital include full medical support, an operating

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room in the event of a Cesarean section, onsite pediatricians, medical technicians and advanced pain-relief options. She stresses, however, that for low-risk pregnancies, often these extra “bells and whistles” go unneeded and may even increase the incidence of a C-section.

While the majority of women choose an OB-GYN for pregnancy care and delivery, in recent years, the number of certified midwives working in hospitals has risen. Like a doctor, midwives are trained health-care providers and are licensed and regulated by the state. A midwife provides a more relational experience, often providing counsel on nutrition, emotional health and other issues before and after the birth. The desire to labor without pain medication or other medical assistance often informs the choice to work with a midwife in the hospital. In a shift toward more personal care, many hospitals offer private rooms, birthing tubs and other amenities, so it’s a good idea to tour several hospitals and meet with a variety of doctors before deciding where to have your baby.

VACCINATIONS Just as in the old choose-your-ownadventure books, there are dozens of pages to turn as your parenting story begins.

Many decisions are personal, but the subject of vaccination is informed by state and local legislation, public school regulations and community opinion. The Center for Disease Control recommends 28 doses of 10 vaccines for children from birth to age 6. Rubella, diphtheria, smallpox, polio and whooping cough have been nearly eradicated in this country through adherence to strict vaccination policies. There is no

federal mandate regarding vaccinations, however, North Carolina law requires all children in the state to receive certain immunizations prior to the start of school.

Most day cares and preschools also require certain immunizations before admittance.

Requirements and more information can be found at immunize.nc.gov.

A contingent of parents choose not to vaccinate based upon religious or personal belief, or medical concern. Many of these concerns stem from a perceived link between vaccines and autism based upon a 1999 study published in the English medical journal Lancet. The journal has since retracted the study. A second study done in 2004 comparing more than 1,200 children on the autism spectrum with 4,469 without autism spectrum disorder found no link between the vaccine and autism. Concern over the additive Thimerosal also colors perception of vaccines, however, this substance is absent in almost all childhood vaccines given since 2001.

“It’s socially controversial, but not controversial in the medical community,” Cleveland says. “I understand that many parents have questions and doubts, and have done Internet research, but I want parents to understand the science behind it.” He cites the most common parent worries as the administration of too many vaccinations at one time overwhelming a baby’s immune system or a potential cause of autism. Understanding that it’s not a one-size fits all decision, Cleveland works to withhold judgment and strives to understand underlying motivations behind vaccine suspicion and refusal.

“I acknowledge that there are risks to everything, but the risks of not vaccinating far outweigh the risks of vaccinating,” he says.

Pediatricians recommend that parents be open about their family medical history and the current health of the child. With good record keeping, it’s possible to be aware of weakened immune systems, a history of allergies or other reactions, chronic medical conditions and illness. All of these factors should be considered before deciding to vaccinate. In most cases, the side effects of vaccinations are limited to pain at the site of injection, mild rash, mild fever or temporary swelling.

CIRCUMCISION Religion, culture, identity, ethics and health are all factors in the decision to circumcise.

Since 2012, when the American Academy of Pediatrics opined that the health benefits of circumcision outweigh the risks, the number of circumcisions (according to CDC statistics) has dropped in the United States with western states falling to approximately four out of 10 male infants circumcised. Although the AAP and the CDC recommendations seem to hinge on clinical research that links circumcision to a decreased risk for urinary tract infections, penile cancer and sexually transmitted diseases, the actual rates of these conditions are quite small.

BREAST OR BOTTLE At the beginning of a baby’s life, the feeding choices are breast or bottle. The AAP, along with the World Health Organization agree that an exclusive breast-milk diet for the first six months, followed by continued breastfeeding with the addition of foods through the first year is best. Breast milk has been found to reduce instances of clinical asthma, atopic dermatitis and eczema. Breastfeeding burns calories and helps mothers lose baby weight. Breast milk is free, available and efficient.

“We believe breastfeeding is the best option for children,” Cleveland says.

Breastfeeding support and assistance can be found through your pediatrician, doula, midwife or social groups. The hardest part of breastfeeding is the first week or two, Cleveland says, but urges moms not to reach for the bottle.

“Although the nutritional value of formula very closely and increasingly approximates that of breast milk, you simply cannot get maternal antibodies from formula,” Cleveland says. “There is also the intimate personal connection between a mom and her baby that happens with breastfeeding. We don’t know how to put a value on that, but we do think that’s valuable.

It’s socially and emotionally affirming to both parties, but especially to the babies.”

Whether due to lack of support or other difficulty, many mothers find the challenges of breastfeeding outweigh the benefits.

Working mothers can find it challenging to pump milk and arrange for storage.

Some mothers find breastfeeding painful or difficult, and others may be uncomfortable nursing in public. Statistics seem to back these very real challenges. According to the most recent CDC survey on breastfeeding rates, nearly 85 percent of North Carolinians have breastfed at some point, but the numbers drop to 59 percent at six months and 33 percent at a child’s first birthday.

FAMILY BED OR CRIB “In our practice, we encourage and promote independent sleep,” Cleveland says. “You want to establish healthy patterns. We know kids and parents sleep better if they are in their own bed after four to six months.

Promoting individual sleep is advantageous for both parent and child.”

In October of 2016, the American Academy of Pediatrics released “Recommendations for a Safe Infant Sleeping Environment,” that acknowledged many parents wind up sleeping with their babies even if they aren’t committed co-sleepers.

The recommendation places a value on breastfeeding and skin-to-skin contact, while encouraging parents to take safety precautions.

Whether co-sleeping is premeditated or the result of parental exhaustion, Tara Haelle and Emily Willingham, authors of the book “The Informed Parent,” recommend parents make bed sharing as low risk as possible by moving beds away from a wall and other furniture. Put the baby to sleep on her back without pillows, blankets or comforters

near her or anything covering her head.

Understand that smoking, alcohol and illicit drugs increase the risk of danger and Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

SLEEP TRAINING You might know where your baby is going to sleep, but how do you ensure he or she will fall asleep? Enter sleep training or “crying it out.” The latter term, Haell and Willingham note “brings on images of a lonely abandoned infant wailing away in the crib to a background noise of the clink of highball glasses and party noise.”

In reality, sleep training is more about establishing a sleep routine. Haell and Willingham’s research suggests that kids need “response to emotional needs – those with emotional response from the mother have less sleep disruption.” With dozens of books outlining a wide spectrum of approaches to sleep training, the only thing experts agree on is that every child is an individual.

Creating a routine based upon your child’s sleep personality may be the most successful strategy. Try for a regular bedtime and stick with the same routine of bath, book and lullaby then bed. The development of calming phrases can also be useful. With some practice, your child will relate these words to sleep. Listen to your child, learn to identify their signals of true distress and offer comfort when it’s needed.

TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS Echoing the philosophy of the consciousparenting movement, Buxton advises moms and dads to “tune in to themselves and see where they are operating from.” Identifying the reasoning behind your choices can assist in navigating what can seem like a blizzard of information. Approach choices presented in your child’s first year with curiosity, flexibility and compassion and let those tools guide you throughout your child’s life.

Tanya Ward Goodman is the author of the award winning memoir, “Leaving Tinkertown,” and the co-founder of Girl Group Enterprises, a social emotional skills series for kids, teens, parents and teachers. charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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Bringing Home Baby: LET A POSTPARTUM CARE SPECIALIST HELP

BY CHRISTA MELNYK HINES Corey Engmann never considered hiring a postpartum doula until she learned she was expecting twins. Feeling overwhelmed and worried about how she would handle twin babies, along with the pressing needs of her 2-year-old, she turned to a certified birth and postpartum doula to help her after her twins arrived.

The postpartum doula spent five nights a week for four months at Engmann’s home after the birth of the twins, providing support, encouragement and help. Her assistance enabled Engmann to get the sleep she needed to recover from a physically demanding pregnancy.

“I can easily say that hiring her was the best thing I have ever done for myself and our family,” Engmann says. “During the day I could be present, loving and enjoying all three of my children. It wasn’t the endless cycle of fatigue and frustration as it sometimes was during the first few months with my first child.”

TRAINED FOR SUPPORT For many new moms, adjusting to life with a baby is fraught with uncertainty and few people to lean on for emotional or practical support. Close family and friends either work full-time or live far away, and partners return to work within days. The isolation and stress can aggravate recovery. A postpartum caregiver can help smooth the transition, guiding a new mother on how to take good care of herself and her newborn.

Plus, many postpartum doulas can assist with light housework, errands, cooking, crowd control and sibling care.

Postpartum doulas are trained to provide support and information on infant

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care, feeding, postpartum recovery, mama-baby bonding and infant soothing techniques.

As a mom of three, Haley Jasmin, owner of Uptown Doula in Charlotte, knows firsthand how difficult the first few weeks of new motherhood can be without support.

“When I brought my first baby home, I didn’t know what I was doing, and I was very much alone. We had very limited support and family that lived several states away so I wasn’t able to call my parents and ask for help,” Jasmin, who is a certified labor doula and certified sleep coach, says.

Even if a grandparent lives nearby, many moms feel uncomfortable asking for help or feel pressure to entertain their relatives, she says.

“A doula thrives on knowing exactly what you need, so order up mama. That’s what we’re here for,” Jasmin says.

Some women opt for a medically trained baby nurse, especially if their baby spent time in the neonatal intensive care unit or requires other specialized care needs. Like postpartum doulas, baby nurses can also be instrumental in nurturing a new mother’s confidence and managing family dynamics that can create stress for new parents.

“I can be the go-to person that can be a professional source of information. If I’m talking to a grandmother, I might say ‘when you were the mother this was how we did

things. This is now how we do things now,’ ” says Nancy Park, registered nurse and owner of Handles with Care Baby Nurse based in Charlotte. “That can help the anxiety level of a new mom who is trying to establish herself as a new mom, but is getting a lot of input from the older generation, which is very commonplace.”

Park also brings her stethoscope to monitor the baby’s heart and lungs and a scale to check weight gain.

“I hate to see them go in and out of a doctor’s office just for a weight check when I can do that myself and provide the information to the doctor,” Park says. “It’s a hassle to get baby ready and go into a waiting room where you don’t know what the other clients might be exposing the baby to.”

MOTHERING THE MOTHER Postpartum caregivers customize their hours according to a mom’s needs.

Many parents find nighttime support particularly indispensable.

“We all need sleep. Without it, we just aren’t our best selves,” Jasmin says. “We work with a lot of mothers who breastfeed so when baby wakes up and needs to nurse,

we bring baby to mom, she nurses, and we take care of the rest so she can easily fall back asleep.”

The caregiver manages everything from swaddling, changing diapers and rocking the baby back to sleep to cleaning bottles and breastpump supplies.

A postpartum caregiver is an experienced voice providing calm assurance and support to a new mama and her family.

“A new mom often doesn’t have her confidence level built up yet. She needs to be reassured that she is the person who knows her baby best,” Park says. “Then, I help coach her into becoming even more aware of her observational skills and what her baby’s behaviors mean.”

Many postpartum caregivers are also trained to recognize the early signs of medical issues with baby or with mom, like postpartum depression.

According to Postpartum Support International, postpartum depression affects one in eight women. It can cause severe, sometimes dangerous, mood swings, which can interfere with healthy motherbaby bonding.

POSTPARTUM CAREGIVER INTERVIEW QUESTIONS Haley Jasmin, owner of Uptown Doula in Charlotte, recommends asking these questions when choosing a doula.

•

What is your education and training background? Do you have references?

•

Do you offer daytime and overnight support?

•

Do you work on your own or do you work with a team?

•

How soon in advance can I book services with you?

•

What is your postpartum doula fee structure? Do you offer discounted packages?

•

Can you cook and are you OK with meal prepping?

•

Do you offer sleep training?

•

Can you help with breastfeeding/ pumping support?

•

How long do you commit to providing postpartum services?

PLAN AHEAD “It’s never too soon to research postpartum care,” Jasmin says. “In my opinion, postpartum care should be part of every birth plan.”

Levels of education and training can vary. When interviewing potential caregivers find out about their qualifications and conduct a background check. “You’re bringing someone into your home to take care of your baby while you are asleep,” Park says. “Your baby is your most precious possession. There has to be a lot of trust there.”

Christa Melnyk Hines is a nationally published journalist who frequently writes about pregnancy and motherhood. She is the author of “Confidently Connected: A Mom’s Guide to a Satisfying Social Life.” charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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The ABCs of Active Reading Settle a squirmy bookworm with active reading

BY SAMANTHA CLEAVER Wrangling a toddler to sit down and read a book, no matter how short, can be like subduing an angry squid. When you look at your barely walking, talking little human, it can be hard to imagine he's getting ready to read, but the foundations for reading success are built in toddlerhood. Children start building the foundation of language and vocabulary when they’re still in diapers, and you’ve been developing your child’s language since the day they were born.

Research shows that when children read well by third grade — when they can easily sound out words and understand what they read in chapter books like “Charlotte’s Web” — they are well on their way to becoming successful lifelong readers. From ages 2 to 5, your child is in a new developmental phase that includes lots of word and language learning, and active reading is the best way to turn toddlerhood into the start of a lifelong love of books.

Talk About What You Read Active reading is a way to read with kids that engages them in talking about picture books.

Active reading is discussing what's happening in the book. For example, when you pick up “Corduroy” by Don Freeman, ask your child, “What did Corduroy step on?” or “What is he doing on the bed?” Point at pictures and name the farm animals in “Duck on a Bike” by David Shannon. And, ask your child if they have ever acted just like Max when he makes mischief in “Where the Wild Things Are” by Maurice Sendak. All these things are active reading.

Active Reading boils down the ABCs:

READ MORE

With Read Charlotte

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Currently, 39 percent of third graders in Mecklenburg County are reading on grade level. Read Charlotte, a local nonprofit, is set to change that.

MAY 2019 | charlotteparent.com

•

•

•

Ask open-ended questions, like: What’s happening on this page? What is the little boy doing?

Build vocabulary by pointing at and naming things you see in the pictures (“Here is a cow”) and talking about interesting words you find (“dreary means gray and sad”).

Connect to the child’s world by building interest in books and talking about how your child can see their own experiences reflected in what they read, building knowledge about the world along the way.

neighborhood and see if you can find all the colors or flowers that are in the books “A Rainbow of my Own” by Lois Ehlert or “Flower Garden” by Eve Bunting.

4. Read and eat. Read “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” by Eric Carle and visit one of the many farmers markets throughout neighborhoods in Charlotte. While you’re at the market, find foods that the caterpillar ate and some that he didn’t.

5. Build knowledge about butterflies. Read “Waiting for Wings” by Lois Ehlert, and then visit the butterfly garden at Discovery

Making the Connection A and B may seem easy enough. The connecting may seem tricky for your toddler, but it’s all about the books you choose and how you use the world right outside your doorstep.

Here are seven ways to connect to your child’s world in Charlotte and a stack of books.

1. Stick with everyday experiences.

Connecting with your child’s world doesn’t have to be fancy. Toddlers love reading books that are about everyday experiences.

Read “Knuffle Bunny” by Mo Willems and visit High Spin Laundry or Spin Tastic laundromats to see the wash spin around for yourself. Read “Lola at the Library” by Anna McQuinn and visit a local library story time. ImaginOn on Seventh Street in uptown Charlotte has a family story time most days at 10:30 a.m.

2. Visit a park. Watch geese and ducks waddle around Freedom Park’s pond and talk about Gossie and his friends in “Gossie” by Oliver Dunrea.

Children age 5 and younger can sign up for Dolly Parton Imagination Library to receive free books every month. Sign up at smartstartofmeck. org/dpil.

3. Color connection. Walk through your

Place Nature. Talk about the different stages of a butterfly’s life and where else you might find butterflies in your neighborhood.

6. Construction site connection. With construction sites on what seems like every corner, connecting with books like “Little Excavator” by Anna Dewdney and “Good Night, Good Night, Construction Site” by Sherri Rinker is easy. Spend time watching what’s happening at the site and ask your child what they notice.

7. Make your own connections. Read “What Daddies Like and What Mommies Like” by Judy Nevin, then create your own list of things that your child loves to do with a favorite family member.

Samantha Cleaver, Ph.D., is a local teacher, mom and author of “Read with Me: Engaging Your Young Child in Active Reading.”

Learn more about active reading at a Charlotte Mecklenburg Library Active Reading workshop. cmlibrary. org/active-reading.

Get more ideas for activities to do with your child baby, toddler and preschooler with Ready4K text message app. Text ReadCLT to 70138.

Find more ideas at summerreadingclt.org.

Character Matters.

It's woven into everything we do at Davidson Day. Learn more.

Call for a personal tour.

704.237.5229

We educate 2 years old12th grade. davidsonday.org

charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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BIRTHDAY BONANZA!

ON THE FARM

It’s time to swap ‘I want a pony’ with ‘I want to paint a pony!’

BY ALYSSA RUANE Birthday parties are often characterized by sweaty skin, sticky hands and a day’s worth of mess for parents to tackle after celebrations subside. Rambunctious little party-goers can destroy a pre-party cleaning sweep within minutes.

This year, preserve your home’s cleanliness (and your sanity) with a birthday party far, far away from your property.

Skip the party-planning stress and host your child’s birthday at a nearby farm.

From York, South Carolina to Statesville, North Carolina, the Charlotte-metro area features at least 17 places to pick strawberries, pumpkins and other harvest produce. Of those 17 farms, more than half also host birthday parties. And, yes, one of them allows children to hand-paint a horse (with nontoxic paint, of course).

The ABCs of Hosting Birthdays at a Farm Although each farm has different offerings for birthday parties, there are some general details parents can expect to encounter. For children age 10 and younger, here’s what to remember before booking a farm for your festivities.

Party packages. Farms that host birthday parties often have tiered pricing and different package options. Lewis Farm in Gastonia, Rescue Ranch in Statesville and Patterson Farm in Mooresville have the most robust offerings for children’s

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birthday parties, with pricing correlating with the number of guests and party add-ons. Add-ons can be everything from strawberry picking in the spring at Hall Family Farm to hand-painting a horse or renting a photo booth service at Lewis Farm. Farms often include a party host or planner in the reservation cost, along with tables, chairs and coolers, so your hands are clean and you can enjoy yourself as well.

Be prepared. Many of the farms hosting parties do not supply food and other party supplies, but this depends on

BIRTHDAY BONANZA! the farm and party package you choose. Wise Acres Organic Farm in Indian Trail has its own locally sourced, wood-fired pizza on-site, and prohibits guests to bring outside pizza, but any other outside foods are fine. Wise Acres also has wagon rides through the woods that can be added to a party package.

With Patterson Farm’s themed geocaching Treasure Mine Adventure and standard summer birthday party packages, ice cream or a drink is included in addition to two hours at the reserved picnic area, access to the barnyard, a party coordinator and a cow barrel train ride.

Costs are typically divided per child, and a minimum amount of guests or money spent is to be expected with the reservation. Per-child pricing averages $10-$15 with at least 15 guests needed for a reservation.

Weather alert. Brittany Lewis, farm manager at Lewis Farm, says it’s important for guests to remember “we are a working farm, so everything might not go as planned depending on weather and animals.” While playing with goats or pigs at Lewis Farm in the sunshine sounds like an ideal birthday for excited young ones, keep impromptu rain storms in mind when booking. Rescue Ranch has an indoor space that can be reserved, though it’s understandable that the charm of a farm party is being outdoors. In that case, look toward Regal Farm or Whispering Hope Farm. Regal’s space is covered and Whispering Hope Farm has a recently constructed barn pavilion.

Alyssa Ruane is a freelance writer and media strategist living the lake life in Cornelius. Find her either at a wine bar or walking her Yorkie, Stevie. Twitter: @alyssaruane

8 Places to Get Down on the Farm RURAL HILL, Huntersville Best in fall with the corn maze. ruralhill.net.

CARRIGAN FARMS, Mooresville Open swim for kids or quarry reservation for Sweet 16s. carriganfarms.com.

LEWIS FARM, Gastonia Photo opps with personal hand-painted horse of a different color. lewisfarm.org.

RESCUE RANCH, Statesville Indoor and outdoor options. rescueranch.com.

PATTERSON FARM, Mooresville Themed geocaching and Treasure Mine Adventure party-package options. visitpattersonfarm.com.

WISE ACRES FARM, Indian Trail Tasty, all-natural pizza on-site ... and it’s really good. wiseacresorganic.com.

WHISPERING HOPE FARM, Gastonia Horseback riding and opportunity to pet nine different kinds of animals. whisperinghopefarm.com.

LAZY 5 RANCH, Mooresville Beyond barnyard animals with exotic giraffe, llama

and zebra experiences. lazy5ranch.com.

Courtesy of The Quarry at Carrigan Farms

FARM-ESQUE EXPERIENCES Energetic kids can enjoy their summer birthdays at other similar experiences in the Charlotte area. Lazy 5 Ranch, the exotic animal zoo in Mooresville, allows kids to feed giraffes and see other intriguing animals. Two of its three detailed birthday party packages include treat bags and special perks for the birthday child.

For a different kind of fun, splash around at an Open Swim at Carrigan Farms and cool off from the incessant Carolina heat. Throughout the summer, every Sunday through Thursday, families and kids of all ages can set up picnic blankets and spend a day swimming in the quarry for $15 per person. Kelly Carrigan says Open Swim is best for younger children’s birthdays, though kids aged 11 and younger must wear a life jacket while swimming and you share the space with other swimmers. The quarry can be rented, complete with rope swings, for teen birthdays with a minimum of 25 people.

BIRTHDAY BONANZA!

Birthday Parties THAT GIVE BACK

Start a new tradition with a charitable birthday bash

BY VANESSA INFANZON The anniversary of the birth of a child is a celebratory time. We gather friends and family to sing “Happy Birthday,” eat cake and play games. Then the long-awaited moment arrives, the birthday boy or girl opens the pile of birthday presents. Some families in Charlotte, however, are swapping birthday presents for a new tradition — birthday parties that give back with a service component included in the celebration.

Melina DeLeon’s invitation to her son’s second birthday party asked parents to bring a new or used book in lieu of a gift. Guests took DeLeon’s offer seriously and cleared their shelves. More than 100 books were donated to Promising Pages, a nonprofit organization that gives books to underserved children in Charlotte.

“It’s very important that we give back to the community, in general,” DeLeon, 34, says. “We want to instill that in our kids at a very young age. These types of birthday parties and volunteering will give them a sense of compassion for people.”

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COMMUNITY BENEFITS Organizations in Charlotte like Promising Pages benefit from these types of birthday celebrations. The Humane Society of Charlotte has been the recipient of fundraisers and supply drives. If they know a child is coming to drop off the donations, they try to make it a special experience with a photo, tour and a visit with a furry resident.

“They are kind and generous kids who are already thinking forward,” Emily Cook, The Human Society of Charlotte marketing and communications director,

BIRTHDAY BONANZA! says. “I can only imagine being that young and being aware of community needs.”

The mission of Bright Blessings, a local nonprofit, is to help celebrate the birthdays of underserved students in the school system, and children and adults living in shelters. The organization supports the growing demand for birthday parties that encourage service and giving with Purpose Parties at its Matthews location. After an educational session about what they’re doing and how it’s important, the birthday child and guests put together kits with snacks, hygiene or baby items.

“It’s great to see kids asking questions,” Erin Clark, program manager, says. “As they absorb the information and work together on a project, you can see them internalize what it would be like if they were in the shoes of some of the children they’re going to help.”

The items for the kits are either provided by the birthday child’s parents or the party guests. Donated kits are then delivered to the shelters and schools.

From Your Location Project may be done at home or anywhere else with guidance from Bright Blessings. The staff helps determine the best project based on the age of the child and what’s most needed.

Noah Levy’s first give-back birthday party was when he turned 4. His mom, Amy Levy, 38, suggested a few places to donate and explained the needs of

This birthday girl collected some most-needed items at her Bright Blessings party.

Courtesy of Bright Blessings.

each organization. They agreed on The Relatives, a nonprofit organization supporting children and youth. The agency needed athletic equipment and Noah’s party was sports-themed. They collected footballs, soccer balls and games.

At his sixth birthday party, Noah wanted to make bags with toiletries and non-perishable items for homeless men. Levy attributes her son’s decision to their family’s involvement with the Men’s Shelter of Charlotte. “It’s something he cares about,” she says. “We make sandwiches together and drop them off at the homeless shelter every few months.

We’ve been doing that since he was young.”

PLANTING THE SEED FOR A SERVICE PARTY How do you get your gift-loving child to give up presents? Julie Sanniota, a licensed psychologist in private practice in south Charlotte, says the introduction of the idea and the child’s readiness are key. She recommends families regularly volunteer so that their children learn from those experiences and develop a sense of pride about what they’re doing to help the community.

“I think it’s more beneficial to do it as a way of life,” she says. “Look at the purpose of why you’re doing it and what you’re trying to achieve.”

5 IDEAS TO PARTY WITH PURPOSE 1.

Contact Peace Passers to setup a soccer equipment drive.

2.

Use the Kids Can Give Too site to raise money for your child’s favorite cause.

3.

Make kits for Bright Blessings programs.

4.

Find out what the Humane Society of Charlotte needs.

5.

Ask party guests to donate books for Promising Pages.

Giving can build self-esteem and character in children, she says, but advises parents to follow the child’s lead. From a developmental standpoint, children under the age of 9 may not be ready to give up presents, especially if they’ve never participated in community service. She says to ask the child if they’re interested in a give-back party and if they say no, then try again the following year.

Eighth-grader Bekah Shore has initiated several give-back birthday parties. Shore, 14, started when she was 7 because another friend did something similar. At her most recent birthday party, 15 girlfriends sang karaoke, decorated cookies and donated food, treats and toys to Carolina Boxer Rescue. She advises other kids to ask their parents first, but then go ahead and get started with their own give-back party.

“Get your kids involved,” Shore recommends to parents. “Find things your kids are interested in and that way they’re enjoying it. They won’t feel forced into it.”

Vanessa Infanzon is a freelance writer who has wanted to write ever since reading Carolyn Keene’s Nancy Drew series. She runs, reads and writes to keep her sense of humor and sanity while raising three boys. charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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EXCURSION

Ocracoke Island Explore North Carolina’s most remote inhabited island

BY ADDIE LADNER

U

nlike many coastal towns in North Carolina that simply require families to load up the car, round up the kids and drive a few hours, taking a trip to the largely uncommercialized, primitive, lush and historic Ocracoke Island requires scheduling and organization. It’s well worth it, though, to enjoy a relaxing beach vacation immersed in the Outer Banks’ expansive natural offerings. Here’s what you need to know to get the most out of a vacation on the state’s most remote inhabited island filled with nature and adventure along the Cape Hatteras National Seashore.

Pedal Your Way Around Cycling remains the preferred way to explore Ocracoke Island. Cyclists have greater access to beautiful island views, and can more easily visit local restaurants and landmarks. See duck families waddling around, old fig trees, the Ocracoke Lighthouse (officially known as the Ocracoke Light Station) and ancient cemeteries. There are more than 80 family graveyards on the island, according to ocracokenavigator.com, a website providing 200-plus interactive maps of the island.

Bring bikes with you or rent one there.

Explore by Foot It’s a bit of a trek to reach Springer’s Point, but worth the hike even with small kids in tow. This large patch of preserved land on Ocracoke Island houses sandy trails, live oak trees, birds and wildlife, and historical markers that educate visitors on the

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Feel free to roam on Ocracoke Island, one of North Carolina’s most remote inhabited islands.

Courtesy Addie Ladner

island’s varied history. It is believed that Edward Teach, also known as Blackbeard, considered this secluded and beautiful part of the island his favorite hideout.

Hike through Springer’s Point and you’ll find yourself on the Pamlico Sound side of the island — a great swimming option with calmer waters for younger kids (a nice alternative to the one lifeguarded beach on the island). Plus, crowds are often smaller, and groves of established trees provide shady spots for picnics and hanging hammocks. Bug spray is a must.

There are no parking options at Springer’s Point, which is why it’s only accessible by foot and bicycle.

Dine by Sunset Ocracoke Island offers limited grocery store options, so shop before you come.

Take advantage of the island’s local restaurant offerings. Enjoy coconut shrimp and other coastal-inspired fare on the deck of Jolly Roger Pub and Marina, a familyfriendly waterfront pub that is perfect for watching sunset while listening to Jimmy Buffet or Brad Paisley covers. Boats motor in and out of the marina as families and fisherman head out or return home from water adventures.

For a more upscale dining experience, head to Dajio. The new American menu changes with the seasons and island offerings, hence the wide range of fresh seafood options.

Getting There It takes a day to get to Ocracoke Island, which is only accessible by ferry, boat or private plane. The route fortunately is scenic with ocean views no matter which method of transportation you choose.

The Hatteras Ferry route is free and takes about an hour from Hatteras Island on the Outer Banks to Ocracoke Island. The Hatteras Ferry is first come, first served, so get there early. Cedar Island Ferry and Swan Quarter Ferry both take more than two hours and require advance ticket purchases through the North Carolina Department of Transportation’s website where you can also view ferry schedules. Be sure to stop by the Ocracoke Pony Pens on your way in to see the Ocracoke “Banker” ponies that once freely roamed the island and are descendants of horses who were shipwrecked with explorers in the 1500s.

Addie Ladner lives in Raleigh with her husband, two young children and beagle mix.

MAY 2019 OUR PICKS

COMPILED BY TIFFANY WOLFF

See Tall Tales of the High Seas at First Ward Park, May 9-11.

Courtesy Strange Fruit

Hope Floats Duck Race | May 5 Watch 35,000 rubber duckies brave the rapids towards the finish line at the U.S. National Whitewater Center while also enjoying face painting, balloon art, kids’ activities and appearances by Quackers, the race mascot. The event begins at 2 p.m. and the ducks race at 3:30 p.m.

FREE, $6 for parking. Purchase a rubber ducky to support Kindermourn and for a chance to wine the grand prize of $2,500. duckrace.com/charlotte.

Haulers on Union Parade and Fan Fest | May 16 More than 30 Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series car haulers rumble down Union Street en route to Charlotte Motor Speedway. Enjoy the free street party from 5 to 8:30 p.m. with live music, activities for children, food trucks, giveaways and race cars on display. FREE. Union Street between Cabarrus and Corban avenues, Concord. 600festival.com.

Tall Tales on the High Seas | May 9-11 Swaying atop 16-foot poles is just part of the program for the Australian performing arts group Strange Fruit. As part of the Charlotte SHOUT! festival, the group presents “Tall Tales of the High Seas” twice daily, 2:30 and 6 p.m., at the Circus Tent at First Ward Park. The story follows three eccentric mariners’ antics aboard a vessel that morphs from humble beached boat to a ship on the high seas. FREE. charlotteshout.com.

Explore the museum and enjoy handson art activities at Family Day at the Bechtler Museum of Modern Art. Photo: Tyrus Ortega Gaines

Family Day at the Bechtler Museum of Modern Art | May 11 Explore the Bechtler collection through special hands-on art activities and familyfocused museum tours. Create paper and ink collages, miniature artist books and tiny tapestries in honor of the newest fourth-floor exhibition Nomadic Murals: Tapestries of the Modern Era. Complimentary guided tours of the galleries at 1 and 3 p.m. $9, free admission for children younger than 18. Noon-4:30 p.m. Bechtler Museum of Modern Art, 420 S. Tryon St. bechtler.org. charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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free. family. fun. artsandscience.org/cultureblocks

ASC_CB_CltPar.indd 1

CULTURE

BLOCKS

10/29/18 4:14 PM

See more things to do at CHARLOT TEPARENT.COM/CALENDAR

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MAY 2019 | charlotteparent.com

1 WEDNESDAY Free Wednesday Evenings at the Mint Museum. Mint Museum Randolph, 2730 Randolph Road, Mint Museum Uptown, 500 S. Tryon St. 5-9pm. Free. Explore the Mint Museum’s exhibitions. mintmuseum.org.

STEAM 101: Art. Hickory Grove Library, 5935 Hickory Grove Road. Ages 12-18. 5:306:30pm. Free. Explore different media and techniques to make art to create art. cmlibrary.org.

2 THURSDAY Art-Making Workshop at University City Regional Library. University City Regional Library, 301 E. W.T. Harris Blvd. 2-3pm.

Free. Create and celebrate artwork inspired by the Bechtler collection. charlottecultureguide.com.

Muddy Boots. Latta Plantation Nature Preserve, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. Ages 6 and older. 1-3pm. $4. Learn how to navigate offtrail and build confidence in wooded spaces. parkandrec.com.

3 FRIDAY On Stage: Dance Fever Charlotte, Hayden: Magician, Junie B. Jones, and Pete the Cat. See page 30.

CML Presents: Music with Holly. ImaginOn: The Joe and Joan Martin Center, 300 E. 7th St. Ages 18 months-5 years. 11:30am-noon.

Free. Join Holly Johnson in a music program that features songs and play. cmlibrary.org.

Crafty Critters. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. Ages 4-11.

10:30-11:30am. $4. Explore the natural world through arts and crafts. Registration is required. parkandrec.com.

4 SATURDAY On Stage: Beatles vs. Stones, Junie B. Jones, Loonis McGlohon Young Jazz Artist Competition, Pete the Cat, and May the Fourth be With You. See page 30.

Davidson Town Day. Davidson Town Green, 216 S. Main St., Davidson. 10am-3pm.

Free. Town Day will offer family games and information provided by local non-profits, entertainment and food available for purchase. nc-davidson2.civicplus.com.

Family First Presented by Novant Health: Sculpting Your Vision. The Harvey B. Gantt Center for African-American Art and Culture, 551 S. Tryon St. Ages 9 and older.

11am-1pm. $5. Create a mixed-media

› sculpted banner inspired by the art of Kevin Cole. ganttcenter.org.

Family Storytime at Midwood Park.

Midwood Park, 2100 Wilhelmina Ave. 10-10:30am. Free. Bring the family for an outdoor story time with movement activities and songs. cmlibrary.org.

Free Comic Book Day. Beatties Ford Road Regional Library, 2412 Beatties Ford Road.

10am-4pm. Free. Pick up free new and used comics, and check out the superhero photo booth and video games. Costumes encouraged. cmlibrary.org.

Paws in the Park. Chestnut Square Park, 320 Chestnut Pkwy., Indian Trail. 10am-3pm.

Free. Vendors, demonstrations, giveaway, contests and a mini off-leash area for pup play dates. indiantrail.org.

South Carolina Strawberry Festival. Walter Elisha Park, 345 N. White St., Fort Mill.

Free; additional cost for activities. The festival features antique cars, strawberries, vendors, fair food, pig races and rides. scstrawberryfestival.com.

Vulture Feedings at Carolina Raptor Center.

Carolina Raptor Center, 6000 Sample Road, Huntersville. 12:30-2pm. $8-$12, children 3 and younger free, included with admission to Raptor Trail. Learn about vultures found at Carolina Raptor Center. carolinaraptorcenter.org.

5 SUNDAY On Stage: Junie B. Jones, Pete the Cat, PJ Masks Live: Save the Day, and Sweet Honey in the Rock. See page 30.

Hello Huntersville. Downtown Huntersville, 101 Huntersville-Concord Road, Huntersville.

2-6pm. Free. This festival highlights regional artists and musicians. Visit local breweries, wineries, vendors and food trucks while listening to live music. huntersville.org/988/ hello-huntersville.

Kindermourn Hope Floats Duck Race.

U.S. National Whitewater Center, 5000 Whitewater Center Pkwy. 2-5pm. Free, $6 for parking. Watch 35,000 rubber duckies brave the rapids towards the finish line while enjoying face painting, balloon art, kids’ activities and appearances by Quackers, the race mascot. Ducks race at 3:30pm. duckrace.com/Charlotte.

May in the Garden. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. 1:30-3pm. Free.

See what is blooming, and get take-home

activities for kids and tips for gardeners.

Registration is required. parkandrec.com.

Mother’s Day Gift Making. UNC Charlotte Botanical Gardens, 9090 Craver Road. Ages 7-12. 1-3pm. $10-$15. Kids are guided in the creation of a hand-crafted, botanicallyinspired gift for Mother’s Day.

6 MONDAY Family Storytime at Midwood Park.

Midwood Park, 2100 Wilhelmina Ave. 11:15-11:45am. Free. Bring the family for an outdoor story time with movement activities and songs. cmlibrary.org.

Story Time Mondays. Daniel Stowe Botanical Garden, 6500 S. New Hope Road, Belmont.

11:15am-noon. $7-$13, children younger than 2 free, included with admission. 704825-4490. Learn about bugs, frogs, plants and other garden friends. dsbg.org.

7 TUESDAY Cake at the Lake. Squirrel Lake Park, 1631 Pleasant Plains Road, Matthews. 7pm.

Free. Come eat a cake by a lake! Join HAWK for cake, s’mores, frog walks and fun. hawkncwf.weebly.com.

Dakota and Friends. ImaginOn: The Joe and Joan Martin Center, 300 E. 7th St. Ages 3-11.

11am-2pm. Free. Meet and interact with Dakota, pet a baby T-Rex. Read aloud to dinosaurs, then take a ride. cmlibrary.org.

Kitchen Chemistry. Independence Regional Library, 6000 Conference Drive. Teen. 2:303:30pm. Free. Teens will explore chemistry as seen in cooking. cmlibrary.org.

8 WEDNESDAY Kitchen Chemistry. University City Regional Library, 301 E. W.T. Harris Blvd. Teen. 4-5pm.

Free. Teens will explore chemistry as seen in cooking, one of the oldest and most widespread uses of applied chemistry. cmlibrary.org.

Nature Detectives: 5 Senses Exploration.

Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. Ages 4-6. 1:30-3pm. $6.

Explore the world through stories, crafts and activities. parkandrec.com.

9 THURSDAY On Stage: Tall Tales on the High Seas, L’Homme Cirque, and What Fresh Hell.

See page 30.

The Soap Bubble Circus and Professor Whizzpop. First Ward Park, 301 E. 7th

CALENDAR

St. 5-10pm. Free. Watch performances with soap bubbles and comedic magic. charlotteshout.com.

10 FRIDAY On Stage: Tall Tales on the High Seas, and L’Homme Cirque. See page 30.

BeachFest Matthews. Stumptown Park, S. Trade St., Matthews. Free admission. Enjoy beach music, shag dancing, carnival rides and inflatables. Fri., 6:30-10pm., Sat., 10:30am-10pm. beachfestmatthews.com.

Yoga Story Time. Barnes and Noble Birkdale Village, 8725 Townley Road, Huntersville.

10:30am. Free. Kids will learn some basic yoga positions that go along with the story. barnesandnoble.com.

11 SATURDAY On Stage: The Big Sing: Mixtape; L’Homme Cirque, and Tall Tales on the High Seas.

See page 30.

2nd Saturday at NASCAR Hall of Fame: Think Tank. NASCAR Hall of Fame, 400 East Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd. $12-$25, children 2 and younger free, included with admission. Participate in a pop-up maker space to compare ideas with others. nascarhall.com.

2019 Queen City Mother’s Day Festival.

Carole Hoefener Center, 615 E. 6th St. 1-5pm. Free. The features a hair expo, live fashion show, dance performances, kids’ activities, mini makeovers, and food and drinks. eventbrite.com/e/2019-queen-citymothers-day-festival-tickets-57219985517.

ASC Culture Blocks: Drums4Life. West Boulevard Library, 2157 West Blvd.

11am-1pm. Free. Join Drums4Life drum circle to experience. No prior experience or instruments are necessary. cmlibrary.org.

Bilingual Stories and Music. Mint Museum Randolph, 2730 Randolph Road.

Recommended for ages 6 and younger.

11:15am-noon. Free. Performers use a combination of English and Spanish stories, music, musical instruments, toys, puppets, and games. mintmuseum.org.

Lake Wylie Family Kayak Tour. McDowell Nature Preserve, 15222 York Road. Ages 5 and older. 9:30-11:30am. $20 single, $25 tandem. Paddle the edges of McDowell Nature Preserve with certified instructors while enjoying nature. Registration required. parkandrec.com.

charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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OUTDOOR MUSIC AND MOVIES Enjoy an evening outside with the family this summer at an outdoor concert or movie. (Events are listed by location and in order of beginning date).

CHARLOTTE USNWC River Jam. (Thursday, Friday and Saturday beginning May 2). Come jam by the water! Additional activities include yoga or organized runs on certain nights.

7-10 pm Free. $6 parking fee. USNWC, 5000 Whitewater Center Pkwy. usnwc.org.

Sounds of Summer in First Ward Park.

(Begins May 3). Hear live music and enjoy food trucks, craft beer and wine. 7-10pm.

Free. First Ward Park, 301 E. Seventh St. uptowncharlotteparks.com.

Movie Night in Midwood Park. Movies under the stars and on the big screen. 8pm.

Free. Midwood Park Amphitheater, 2100 Wilhelmina Ave. plazamidwood.org.

MAY 11: “Top Gun” for Parents’ Night Romare Bearden’s Party in the Park.

(Select Wednesdays beginning May 15). Live music in the park. 6-9pm. Free.

Romare Bearden Park, 300 S. Church St. uptowncharlotteparks.com.

Charlotte Symphony Summer Pops at Symphony Park. (Begins June 16).

Listen to the sounds of the Charlotte Symphony and enjoy the summer evenings.

8:15pm. $5-$20, children 12 and younger Free. Symphony Park, 4400 Sharon Road. charlottesymphony.org.

BELMONT Friday Night Live. (May 10 and 24).

Enjoy live music, food trucks and a beverage garden. 6-10pm; band starts at 7pm.

Downtown Belmont, S. Main St., Belmont. nc-belmont.civicplus.com.

Movies in the Park. (Second Saturday of the month beginning May 11). Bring chairs and blankets to watch movies in the park.

Concessions available. 7pm. Free. Stowe Park, 24 S. Main St., Belmont. cityofbelmont.org.

CORNELIUS Cornelius Jazz Festival. (May 18). Experience an evening filled with local jazz bands, vendors, food trucks and children’s activities. 5-9pm. Free.

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Smithville Park, 19710 S. Ferry St., Cornelius. cornelius.org.

Outdoor Cinema Series. (Beginning June 15). All movies are shown on an inflatable screen at locations throughout Cornelius with refreshments available for purchase. 8:30pm.

Free. cornelius.org.

DAVIDSON Concerts on the Green. (May 5 and 19, June 2 and 9). Live music on the Village Green. 6-8pm. Free. Village Green, corner of Main Street and Concord Road, Davidson. concertsonthegreen.org.

GASTONIA Downtown Gastonia Concert Series.

(Begins May 17). DJ spins at 6pm; bands play at 7pm. See website for performer lineup. Free.

Rotary Centennial Pavilion, 107 N. South St., Gastonia. cityofgastonia.com.

HARRISBURG Movies in the Park. Catch screenings of family-friendly films on an inflatable screen.

Bring lawn chairs and blankets, and arrive early for children’s activities. Activities begin a 5pm, and movies begin at sunset. Free.

Harrisburg Park, 191 Sims Pkwy., Harrisburg. harrisburgnc.org.

MAY 3: “The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part” MAY 31: “Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse” Rockin the ‘Burg Concert Series. (The second Saturday of the month beginning May 11). A family-friendly outdoor concert series that features food trucks, inflatable and other outdoor yard games, and live music.

Bring lawn chairs and blankets. 6:30-9pm. Free.

Harrisburg Park, 191 Sims Pkwy., Harrisburg. harrisburgnc.org.

HUNTERSVILLE Movies in the Park. Bring a lawn chair or blanket and cozy up for some outside entertainment. Drinks, popcorn, candy available for purchase. Movies start just after sunset. Free.

Veterans Park, corner of Main and Maxwell streets, Huntersville. huntersville.org.

MAY 2019 | charlotteparent.com

INDIAN TRAIL Hits After 6. (May 16). Enjoy summer nights with outdoor music. Food and alcohol available to purchase. Free. 6-9pm. Crossing Paths Park, 120 Blythe Drive, Indian Trail. indiantrail.org.

Fourth Friday Flicks. (May 24). Bring your blanket and chairs and enjoy a movie in the park. Food available for purchase. 6-9pm; movie begins at dusk. Free. Crossing Paths Park, 120 Blythe Drive, Indian Trail. indiantrail.org.

MATTHEWS Food Truck Fridays and Concert Series.

(Second and fourth Fridays through Sept.

27, except May 11). Matthews presents food trucks, kids’ activities, craft beer and wine, and live music. 5-9pm. Free. Stumptown Park, 120 S. Trade St., Matthews. matthewsnc.gov.

Charlotte Symphony Night in Stumptown Park. (June 8). Hear the Charlotte Symphony perform while enjoying food truck fare.

7pm. Free. Stumptown Park, 120 S. Trade St., Matthews. matthewsnc.gov.

MINT HILL Family Fun Nights. (June 8 and July 13).

Enjoy games, food and inflatables. Bring chairs and blankets. 6:30pm. Free. Front of Town Hall, 4430 Mint Hill Village Lane, Mint Hill. minthill.com.

MOORESVILLE Festival of Food Trucks. (First Saturday of each month beginning May 4). Sample gourmet fare, stroll the streets, shop and listen to live music. 5-8:30pm. Free. Downtown Mooresville, N. Main St. (between Moore and Iredell Ave.), Mooresville. downtownmooresville.com.

Bring a blanket to spread out to enjoy outdoor movies and music this spring and summer.

PINEVILLE Rockin’ and Reelin’ Movie and Concert Series. (Beginning June 14). Concerts start at 7pm; movies start at dusk. Free. Pineville Lake Park, 1000 Johnston Drive, Pineville. pinevillenc.gov.

ROCK HILL Food Truck Friday Rock Hill. (Third Friday each month beginning May 17). Enjoy local food truck far, beers and wine, children’s activities and live music. 6-10pm. Free admission. Fountain Park, 300 E. Main St., Rock Hill. onlyinoldtown.com.

Movies in the Park Presents: Christopher Robin. (May 25). Watch “Christopher Robin” under the stars. The film begins just after sunset.

8 pm Free. Ebenezer Park, 4490 Boatshore Road, Rock Hill.

TEGA CAY Tega Cay Concert Series. (May 18 and June 15). Let children play in the kids’ zone and sample local food-truck fare. See website for band schedule and list of participating food trucks. 6-10pm. Free. Runde Park, 5110 Windward Drive, Tega Cay. tegacaysc.org.

WAXHAW Jammin’ by the Tracks (First Friday of each month beginning May 3). Live music with a family friendly atmosphere. 7-9pm. Free. Downtown Waxhaw under the water tower. waxhaw.com.

SEE THE COMPLETE LIST OF OUTDOOR MUSIC AND MOVIES AT CHARLOTTEPARENT.COM/THINGSTODO

Mommy and Me Tea at Daniel Stowe Botanical Garden. Daniel Stowe Botanical Garden, 6500 S. New Hope Road, Belmont. 11am-1pm. $35 per person, includes admission. Share ice teas and tea sandwiches with mom. Take home a gift and craft. dsbg.org.

Sheep Shearing Day. Historic Brattonsville, 1444 Brattonsville Road, McConnells.

10am-4pm. $5-$8, free for children 3 and younger. Watch shearing demos and costumed interpreters highlight processes such as spinning, carding, dyeing and turning raw wool into finished garments. chmuseums.org.

Spring into Arts Festival. Historic Downtown Concord, 65 Union Street S., Concord.

10am-4pm. Free. Enjoy live music, food and drink vendors, a juried art show, and a children’s creation station. cabarrusartscouncil.org.

Super Saturday: Soap Bubble Circus.

ImaginOn: The Joe and Joan Martin Center, 300 E. 7th St. 1-1:45pm. Free. See amazing bubble structures and forms, guaranteed to surprise and delight. cmlibrary.org.

12 SUNDAY

MOTHER’S DAY Kids Bicycle Safety Rodeo. Arbor Glen Outreach Center, 1520 Clanton Road.

11am-1pm. Free. Learn bike safety and how to ride a bike using the balance bike method. learntorideclt.com.

Mother’s Day Family Hike. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. 2-3:30pm.

Free. Celebrate this special day by taking a stroll with the family. parkandrec.com.

Mother’s Day Weekend at Daniel Stowe Botanical Garden. Daniel Stowe Botanical Garden, 6500 S. New Hope Road, Belmont.

11am-3pm. $7-$13; children under 2 Free.

Shop vendors, and enjoy family crafts, food trucks, live music and spring blossoms. dsbg.org.

Tree ID Hike. Anne Springs Close Greenway Dog Park, 148 Adventure Road, Fort Mill.

2pm. Free for members, $5 entry fee for nonmembers. Learn how to identify some of common native trees using basic tree markers such as shape, bark, twigs and fruit. ascgreenway.org.

›

13 MONDAY

Babes in the Woods. McDowell Nature Preserve, 15222 York Road. Ages birth-3.

10-11am. Free. Hit the paved trail with your little one, and experience nature.

Registration required. parkandrec.com.

Small Stalks. Daniel Stowe Botanical Garden, 6500 S. New Hope Road, Belmont. Ages 2-5. 10-11am. $10 per parent/child; $6 for each additional participant. Explore nature through stories, song, crafts and play. dsbg.org.

14 TUESDAY Charlotte Knights: Star Wars Night. BB&T Stadium, 324 S. Mint St. 7pm. $12+. The first 2,000 fans receive a Good Knight Charlie Bobblehead as part of the club’s 6th Annual Star Wars Knight. charlotteknights.com.

Free Tuesday at the Schiele Museum. The Schiele Museum, 1500 E. Garrison Blvd., Gastonia. 4-8pm. Free. Get free entry to museum every second Tuesday of the month from 4-8pm. schielemuseum.org.

15 WEDNESDAY African Dance Class. Sugar Creek Recreation Center, 943 West Sugar Creek Road. 7-8pm.

CALENDAR

Free. Charlotte Ballet’s Cultural Dance Program presents African Dance classes.

Classes are drop-in format and open to all ages. charlottecultureguide.com.

STEAM 101: The Science of Making Ice Cream. Sugar Creek Library, 4045 N. Tryon St. Ages 10-18. 3:30-5:30pm. Free. Learn the history of ice cream, and make your own delicious sundae. cmlibrary.org.

16 THURSDAY ASC Culture Blocks and CM Library Present: Clayworks. Scaleybark Library, 101 Scaleybark Road. 5:30-7pm. Free. A handson workshop to learn how to texturize and manipulate clay. cmlibrary.org.

Cultural Readings and Rhythms from the Rocker. Belmont Branch Library, 125 N. Central Ave., Belmont. 6:30-7:30pm. Free.

Join the Belmont Branch Library for a special story time showcasing culture through storytelling and performing arts. facebook. com/ElementsofEmpowermentInc. Preschool Explorers. McDowell Nature Preserve, 15222 York Road. Ages 2-5. $4.

Little ones and adults discover nature together through crafts, games, songs, animal encounters and outdoor exploration.

download digital resources for FREE. Looking to borrow e-books, comics, audio books, music, movies and television — with no holds, no waiting and no cost? Try hoopla, OverDrive, NCKids, RBDigital, Freegal and more with your Charlotte Mecklenburg Library card. Visit cmlibrary.org/resources to start your next adventure now!

310 North Tryon St., Charlotte, NC 28202 (704) 416-0100 • cmlibrary.org

charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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›

CALENDAR Registration is required. 10-10:45am and 11-11:45am. parkandrec.com.

17 FRIDAY Crafty Critters. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. Ages 4-11. 10:3011:30am. $4. Explore the natural world through arts and crafts. Registration and parent attendance required. parkandrec.com.

See a battle of tribute bands at the Beatles Vs. Stones showdown May 4. Photo by Michelle Fairless

18 SATURDAY ON STAGE

Pete the Cat. (Through May 5). Everyone’s favorite rocking blue cat takes the stage in this musical performance. See website for show times. Children’s Theatre of Charlotte, McColl Family Theater, 300 E. 7th St. Ages 4 and older. $19+. ctcharlotte.org.

Beatles Vs. Stones. (May 4). Tribute bands, Abbey Road and Satisfaction: The International Rolling Stones Show, engages in an on-stage, musical showdown. McGlohon Theater at Spirit Square, 345 N. College St. 8pm. $35-$65. blumenthalarts.org.

Junie B. Jones The Musical Jr. (Through May 5). Join Junie B. on her first day of first grade, where many changes are in store.

See website for showtimes. Armour Street Theatre, 307 Armour St., Davidson. Ages 4 and older. $12. davidsoncommunityplayers.org.

May the Fourth be With You. (May 4).

Enjoy a night of sci-fi, Star Wars-inspired improv. Stage Door Theater, 130 N. Tryon St. 6pm. $10. blumenthalarts.org.

Hayden: Magician. (May 3). Hayden is an award-winning magician based in the Queen City who specializes in the art of illusion. Stage Door Theatre, 155 N. College St. Recommended for ages 10 and older. 8pm. $25-$30. carolinatix.org.

Dance Fever Charlotte. (May 3). Dance Fever Charlotte presents “Dancing through the Pages.” Performances at 3 and 5pm. Dale F. Halton Theater, 1206 Elizabeth Ave. $10-$15.

704-330-6534. tix.cpcc.edu.

Loonis McGlohon Young Jazz Artist Competition. (May 4). Up to 10 selected finalists perform. The Jazz Garden Tent at Romare Bearden Park, 300 S. Church St. 2pm.

Free. blumenthalarts.org.

Charlotte Symphony Youth Orchestra Side-by-Side. (May 4). The Charlotte Symphony Youth Orchestra performs works with Charlotte Symphony. Northwest School of the Arts Auditorium, 1415 Beatties Ford Road. 2:30pm. $15 for adults, free for students. charlottesymphony.org.

PJ Masks Live: Save the Day! (May 5).

The new show features preschoolers’ favorite young superheroes and familiar songs from the popular show along with brand new music and a whole new adventure.

Ovens Auditorium, 2900 E. Independence Blvd. 3pm. $29.50+. 800-745-3000. ovensauditorium.com.

Sweet Honey in the Rock. (May 5). The performance ensemble, rooted in African American history and culture, educates, entertains and empowers its audience through a cappella singing and American Sign Language interpretation. McGlohon Theater at Spirit Square, 345 N. College St. 7pm. $24$44. 704-372-1000. blumenthalarts.org.

L’Homme Cirque: David Dimitri’s One Man Circus. (May 9-11). See dramatic feats like high-wire flips and a human cannon launch with humor, poetry and serenades on the accordion. See website for showtimes. Circus Tent at First Ward Park, 301 E. 7th St. Free. $20, general admission. blumenthalarts.org.

Tall Tales on the High Seas. (May 9-11).

This epic tale, performed atop 16-foot sway poles, follows three mariners aboard a vessel that morphs from humble beached boat to a ship on the high seas. 2:30 and 6pm show times. Part of Charlotte SHOUT! Circus Tent at First Ward Park, 301 E. 7th St. Free. charlotteshout.com.

What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood Live! (May 9). Podcasters Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables are two moms with tons of experience in parenting and in comedy, with the hilarious stories to prove it.

7:30pm. Booth Playhouse, 130 N. Tryon St. $14.99+. blumenthalarts.com.

The Big Sing: Mixtape. (May 11). Carolina Voices’ MainStage Choir covers the best tracks from The Beach Boys to The Beatles, and Sarah Bareilles to Michael Jackson.

Shows at 3 and 7:30pm. McGlohon Theater at Spirit Square, 345 N. College St. $15-$25. carolinavoices.org Colors of Song. (May 18). St. John’s Baptist Church, 300 Hawthorne Lane. 7pm. $10-$20. The blending of colors and hues in visual art translates to the blending of voices in choral music. carolinavoices.org/ shows/colors-of-song.

A Sick Day for Amos McGee. (May 29-June 9). In this heart-warming story about the joys of friendship, Amos McGee knows friends can come in all shapes, sizes and species.

See website for show times. Wells Fargo Playhouse, 300 E. 7th St. Ages 8 and older. $10+. 704-973-2828. ctcharlotte.org.

On Stage: Colors of Song. See page 30.

Animal Pool Party. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. 1:30-2:30pm.

Free. Join aquatic turtles on the lawn as they go for a dip in the turtle pools. parkandrec.com.

ASC Culture Blocks and CM Library Presents: Arts+. Scaleybark Library, 101 Scaleybark Road. 2:30-4:30pm. Free. A visual art workshop series with live music. cmlibrary.org.

Bug Day. The Schiele Museum of Natural History, 1500 E. Garrison Blvd., Gastonia. 10am-4pm. $3, does not include museum admission. Learn about bugs from entomologists, and enjoy crafts and games. Meet a “Bug Whisperer,” and don’t miss the bug-eating contest. schielemuseum.org.

Cheeerwine Festival 2019. Downtown Salisbury, Salisbury. Noon-10pm. Free. Visit downtown Salisbury for cold Cheerwine, Southern food, family-friendly activities, a beer garden, local craft vendors and live music. cheerwinefest.com.

Greater Charlotte Asian Festival. Ramsey Creek Park, 18441 Nantz Road, Cornelius. 9am-5pm.

Free. Learn about various Asian cultures through food and activities. Plus, see teams race to the finish line in colorfully-decorated dragon boats. charlottedragonboat.com.

MeckDec Day Celebration at The Charlotte Museum of History. The Charlotte Museum of History, 3500 Shamrock Drive. Noon-4pm.

Free. Learn about Hezekiah Alexander’s role in declaring independence in the 1774 Rock House, see a Colonial cooking demonstration and costumed interpreters portraying historical figures. Registration required. charlottemuseum.org.

Mother Earth: Circles of Caring Storytelling.

Reedy Creek Nature Center, 2900 Rocky River Road. Ages 6 and older. 2-4pm. Free. Hear stories from seasoned story tellers from

CALENDAR The Charlotte Parent calendar lists free and low-cost localstand regional events for children and families. To submit an event for consideration, go to charlotteparent.com/calendar, then click 30 MAY 2019 | charlotteparent.com an Event. Submission deadline for print is the 1 of the month prior to the next month’s publication. Time, dates and details of events are subject to change. Call venue to confirm.

POLICY on Submit

› the North Carolina Storytelling Guild. ncstoryguild.org/events.html.

South County Presents Free Comic Book Day. South County Regional Library, 5801 Rea Road. 11am-3pm. Free. Come for free used comic books and superhero movie screenings. cmlibrary.org.

19 SUNDAY Spring Has Sprung Scavenger Hunt.

McDowell Nature Preserve, 15222 York Road. 3-4pm. Free. Families will explore spring wildflowers in the nature preserve during this self-led scavenger hunt for prizes. parkandrec.com.

Sunday Fun Day: Imagine and Invent. Mint Museum Uptown, 500 S. Tryon St. 1-4pm.

Children, free; adults, $6. Design a doodle bot, build with Makerspace Charlotte and celebrate the 75th Sunday Fun Day. mintmuseum.org.

WellieWishers Friendship Tea Party.

American Girl Southpark Mall, 4400 Sharon Road. Ages 5 and older. 3:30-5pm. $13.50. Reserve your spot for the tea party for refreshments, crafts and cupcakedecorating. americangirl.com/retail/ charlotte.php.

20 MONDAY STEAM 101: STEAM Me up Mondays.

University City Regional Library, 301 E. W.T. Harris Blvd. Ages 8-12. 4-5pm. Free. Create obstacle courses for Hexbugs using Lego pieces and blocks. cmlibrary.org.

Yoga Storytime. Cornelius Library, 21105 Catawba Ave., Cornelius. 6-6:30pm. Free.

Discover how movement can bring stories to life in new ways. cmlibrary.org.

21 TUESDAY Little 600. GoPro Motorplex, 130 Motorplex Drive, Mooresville. 5-9pm. Free. Some of NASCAR’s biggest names battle each other for bragging rights in GoPro Motorplex’s rental fleet of go-karts. 600festival.com.

Story Time and More. Children’s Garden at Wing Haven, 260 Ridgewood Ave. Recommended for children younger than 10. 10-11am. $10 per family, free for members. Enjoy a story and craft activity. winghavengardens.org.

Toddler Time at Big Air. Big Air Trampoline Park, 2408 Sardis Road N. Ages 6 and younger. 10am-1pm. $8. Big Air Trampoline Park opens its doors for little ones to jump

at their own speed and comfort level. bigairusa.com.

Fri., 4-11pm; Sat., 11am-11pm; Sun., noon6pm. minthillmadnessfestival.org.

22 WEDNESDAY

25 SATURDAY

Nature Detectives: Chemistry Fun. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. Ages 4-6. 1:30-3pm. $6.

Explore the world through stories, crafts and activities. parkandrec.com Puppet Show. Mint Hill Library, 6840 MatthewsMint Hill Road, Mint Hill. 6:30-7pm. Free.

Enjoy puppet shows, songs and movement activities that support early literacy. cmlibrary.org.

Circle K Speed Street Presented by CocaCola. Each day starting at noon, vendor displays, kids’ activities, racing-related fun and more until 8 p.m. National headliners take the stage in Romare Bearden Park starting at 6:30 p.m. Free for festival; tickets to Romare Bearden Park’s concerts vary per performance.

600festival.com. Lake Wylie Family Stand-up Paddleboard. McDowell Nature Preserve, 15222 York Road. Ages 12 and older. 2-4pm. $15 single, $20 tandem. Glide along the water while enjoying nature. Registration is required. parkandrec.com.

Mint Hill Madness. Mint Hill Veterans Memorial Park, 8850 Fairview Road, Mint Hill. Free.

The Mint Hill Madness festival offers something for everyone, food, music, a family carnival, an arts and crafts fair, parade, and a firework show. Fireworks begin at approximately 10pm on Saturday.

Fri., 4-11pm; Sat., 11am-11pm; Sun., noon6pm. minthillmadnessfestival.org.

Super Hero Story Time. SAS Cupcakes, 9941 Rea Road, Suite C. 10:30am. $9. Listen to a story, and meet Wonder Woman and Spider Man. sascupcakes.com.

23 THURSDAY Circle K Speed Street Presented by CocaCola. Each day starting at noon, vendor displays, kids’ activities, racing-related fun and more until 8 p.m. National headliners take the stage in Romare Bearden Park starting at 6:30 p.m. Free for festival; tickets to Romare Bearden Park’s concerts vary per performance.

600festival.com.

Preschool Explorers. McDowell Nature Preserve, 15222 York Road. Ages 2-5. $4. Little ones and adults discover nature together through crafts, games, songs, animal encounters and outdoor exploration. Registration is required.

Time slots are 10-10:45am and 11-11:45am. parkandrec.com.

STEAM 101: Escape Room. Independence Regional Library, 6000 Conference Drive.

Teen. 2:30-3:30pm. Free. Use critical thinking skills and the library’s online resources in an interactive escape room game. cmlibrary.org.

24 FRIDAY Circle K Speed Street Presented by CocaCola. Each day starting at noon, vendor displays, kids’ activities, racing-related fun and more until 8 p.m. National headliners take the stage in Romare Bearden Park starting at 6:30 p.m. Free for festival; tickets to Romare Bearden Park’s concerts vary per performance.

600festival.com.

Mint Hill Madness. Mint Hill Veterans Memorial Park, 8850 Fairview Road, Mint Hill. Free.

The Mint Hill Madness festival offers something for everyone, food, music, a family carnival, an arts and crafts fair, parade, and a firework show. Fireworks begin at approximately 10pm on Saturday.

26 SUNDAY Memorial Day Celebration. U.S. National Whitewater Center, 5000 Whitewater Center Pkwy. 9am-10pm. Free; $6 for parking; Additional fee for activities. Festivities include yoga and live music. Fireworks begin at dusk. Happening Friday, Saturday and Sunday. usnwc.org.

Reptile Encounters. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. Free. Meet some of the nature center’s resident reptiles.

Encounters at 2 and 3pm. parkandrec.com.

27 MONDAY MEMORIAL DAY Candy Art. Town Hall, 315 Matthews-Indian Trail Road, Indian Trail. Ages 5-10. 6:30-8pm. $10. Turn sweet treats into beautiful candy art. indiantrail.org.

Memorial Day at Historic Brattonsville.

Historic Brattonsville, 1444 Brattonsville Road, McConnells. 10am-4pm. $5-$8, children 3 and younger and active duty military and their families Free. Interpreters

CALENDAR

dressed in constume demonstrate how folks in the Carolina backcountry farmed, cooked and played during the colonial period. chmuseums.org.

Nature Scavenger Hunt. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville.

10am-2pm. Free. Stop by the nature center first to pick up your scavenger hunt, and enjoy this self-guided adventure. parkandrec.com.

28 TUESDAY Ani-May. Fort Mill Public Library, 1818 2nd Baxter Crossing, Fort Mill. Ages 11-17.

5-6:30pm. Free. Anime lovers are invited to hang out and geek out. yclibrary.org.

29 WEDNESDAY On Stage: A Sick Day for Amos McGee. See page 30.

Creating with Books: Gallery Crawl. South County Regional Library, 5801 Rea Road.

Ages 5-11. 4:30-5:30pm. Free. Discover famous artists and create your own watercolor masterpiece on the patio. cmlibrary.org.

30 THURSDAY On Stage: A Sick Day for Amos McGee. See page 30.

Little Bit Fit Time. Charlotte Allstar Gymnastics and Cheerleading, 11011 Monroe Road, Matthews. Ages 5 and younger. 10:30am-noon. $3-$5. With parental guidance, toddlers can jump on the trampoline, play in the foam pit and craw through obstacles. Cash only. charlotteallstars.net.

Puppet Show at ImaginOn. ImaginOn: The Joe and Joan Martin Center, 300 E. 7th St. 11:30am-noon. Free. See a puppet show with activities that support early literacy and foster a love of books. cmlibrary.org.

31 FRIDAY On Stage: A Sick Day for Amos McGee. See page 30.

Crafty Critters. Latta Nature Center, 6211 Sample Road, Huntersville. Ages 4-11.

10:30-11:30am. $4. Explore the natural world through arts and crafts. Registration and parent attendance required. parkandrec.com.

charlotteparent.com | MAY 2019

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DADDY DEREK

Getting Boys to Open Up

BY DEREK JAMES Disclaimer: Daddy Derek is not a doctor.

Opinions expressed here are educational, informational and mildly entertaining. In other words, it’s possible I’m full of it.

G

etting boys to talk isn’t easy. I know because not only am I a parent to two boys, I once was a boy. It’s important to realize that boys want to connect with others on a deep level, but they don’t always know how. That means that as parents, we have to practice patience — lots and lots of patience. There will be times, regardless of our best efforts, that we won’t get much out of boys, but in my experience, patience pays off. Stay calm and show them that they can trust you, and eventually they open up.

It’s also important to know that every boy — every child for that matter — has different styles of communication. One of my sons wears his emotions on his sleeve and immediately tells you how he feels or what he needs. My other son is far more fluid in his communication style.

He sometimes prefers to write something out if he’s sad rather than tell me what’s bothering him. It seems to calm him down, and gives me time to process those emotions with him. It also keeps me from asking a million questions, which to a kid often seems more like an interrogation

32

MAY 2019 | charlotteparent.com

than heartfelt concern. Some days, it’s hard enough for my guys to remember what they did at school when they get off the bus. I’ve learned that asking a bunch of questions right after they get home yields mixed results.

I get the most conversation out of both of my boys when we are doing something together, whether it’s tossing the football or baseball, playing “Mario Kart,” building something or getting ice cream. Scenarios where there’s no forcing an issue are often the ones where you’re best able to learn more about things that are going at school, their fears are and what they need from you. My oldest son and I always have our best conversations when we are out for a run on the greenway.

During these moments, it’s easier for me to give them advice in a non-threatening way and help with problem solving.

As much as we want to help guide our children, our primary job is to listen. Don’t respond before hearing and understanding what your son is saying. Parents often have predetermined thoughts on a topic that may need to be augmented or reconsidered based on what our children tell us. When you actively listen and aren’t pushing, boys share some pretty incredible stuff about life.

It’s also important to recognize body language. Sometimes, by careful observation, you can tell when he’s not willing or ready to talk about something.

Stay calm. Let him know that that’s OK and that it’s something you can come back to later.

Showing interest in what they are interested in also helps build trust and assurance that you care about what they care about. It can be tough to get excited about Pokémon or the latest stunt the “Dude Perfect” guys did on Nickelodeon, but you need to acknowledge what they are telling you and keep the eye rolls to a minimum. Plus, if they see you do the eye roll, you are more than likely going to get 10 times as many eye rolls from them when discussing something they aren’t interested in. They are just better at it than we are.

Trust me, I know this from vast experience.

Being there for your kids isn’t always about doing something. Sometimes, it’s simply about letting them know you care by hearing what they have to say. It’s a process, but one well worth the time and effort.

Derek James is a host of WCCB News Rising.

He and his wife live in Charlotte with their sons who are ages 8 and 10.

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