M Magazine April 2022 Palo Alto

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april calendar

T H I N G S T O DO

22 nd

March 31ST–April 24TH

2nd & 3rd

Check for times

April 2 @8 pm | April 3 @2:30 pm

La Cage Aux Folles

Georges is the owner of the La Cage Aux Folles nightclub, which features a drag show starring his partner and the love of his life, Albin. After twenty years of unwedded bliss, Georges and his partner Albin face the hardest challenge of their relationship... meeting the parents of their son's fiancé. When Albin tries and fails to take on a masculine persona in the role of Uncle Al, he gets more creative in order to find a way to be part of the “meet the parents” experience. Based on Jean Poiret’s 1973 French play of the same name, the multi-Tony award-winning La Cage Aux Folles is a musical filled with delightful spectacle and great heart. Season ticket packages are available, for up to 35% off the price of single tickets, plus generous discounts on other shows and food offerings in the 3Below Cafe. For a full list of benefits and pricing go to: sanjoseplayhouse.org.

3Below Theaters & Café, San Jose 8

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American Masters

Four composers, whose works defined America in the ‘30s and ‘40s, come together on one grand program: Aaron Copland, George Gershwin, Leonard Bernstein, and Duke Ellington. Copland’s expansive, optimistic Appalachian Spring became known as “the quintessential American sound.” In fact, all four composers could stake that claim. Gershwin and Bernstein each gave us a brilliant mix of symphonic music, jazz and Broadway. And Duke Ellington’s stunning reflection on Black history from slavery to the Harlem Renaissance is considered one of the greatest examples of long-form jazz. Drawing on the blues, soaring gospel music, work songs, swing, and more, Ellington created an all-American orchestral masterpiece.

Tickets: $55 - $115 at symphonysanjose.org.

San Jose Center for the Performing Arts, San Jose

April 6th – May 1st

Gem of the Ocean Check for times

Gem of the Ocean is set in 1904 against the tempestuous backdrop of police violence and

rioting. A young Black man desperate for redemption visits 285-year-old Aunt Ester, the community’s spiritual advisor and keeper of collective memory. The wise elder takes him on a supernatural voyage of justice and freedom aboard a slave ship to learn the truth of his ancestors’ history. Gem of the Ocean was nominated for five Tony Awards including Best Play.

Tickets: From $30; savings available for educators, seniors, and patrons 35 and under. Pricing subject to change.

For information or to order tickets visit theatreworks.org.

Mountain View Center for the Performing Arts

8th – 10th

RENT

Check for times For a quarter of a century, Jonathan Larson’s RENT has inspired us to choose love over fear and to live without regret. This Tony Award and Pulitzer Prize-winning phenomenon follows a year in the lives of a diverse group of artists and friends struggling to follow their dreams without selling out. It has become more than a musical – it’s a cultural touchstone, a rite of passage and a source of joy and strength for millions.

RENT has become a part of us forever.

Tickets: $43–$103 are available now online at broadwaysanjose.com.

San Jose Center for the Performing Arts, San Jose

9th, 10th, 16th

Just Bunnies! (An Egg-cellent Easter Adventure!)

11:00 am & 1:30 pm

San Jose Clubhouse - a program for youth and families, includes a minimusical followed by activities and character meet and greets and postperformance activities for youth that are themed to the production.

Velma Bunny, Tommy Bunny, Bootsie Bunny, and Eddie Rabbit anxiously await their invitation to the great, big Easter basket in the forest, where they must showcase their knowledge in all things Easter…otherwise they’ll never impress their fearless leader, The Big Giant Hare, or make it to the beloved “Eggtown” in time for Easter! For kids ages 4 to 12 with parent supervision. Tickets: $20 $40 sanjoseplayhouse.org Check website for various ticket types and price differences.

3Below Theaters & Café, San Jose

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th Easter Egg Hunt 12:30 pm

The popular Easter Egg Hunt at Gamble Garden is back! Bring your children to this special tradition.

Petting zoo, Arts & Crafts, treats and a beautiful setting for a fun egg hunt.

This will be a sold-out event, so buy your tickets now. All guests over the age of 2 must wear masks at Gamble Garden, regardless of vaccination

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status. Thank you for keeping everyone safe. Tickets: Infants 1 year and below: FREE; Children aged 2-17: $40; Adults 18 and up: $30.

Gamble Gardens, Palo Alto

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24th

nd Spring Tour

10:00 am - 4:00 pm

Gamble Garden’s popular annual Spring Tour is back in-person for 2022! Celebrate Spring at Gamble Garden with a tour of five beautiful homes and gardens, carefully curated to inspire and delight.

Before or after your tour, visit Gamble Garden to shop for unique gift items at the Marketplace, and find gently used treasures at Over The Garden Fence sale. Get advice from horticultural resources, enjoy lunch and refreshments, while live music serenades you throughout the day. Don’t miss the event of the season! marintheatre.org or 415388-5208 Gamble Gardens, Palo Alto

22

nd Tootsie

Check for times

This laugh-out-loud love letter to the theater tells the story of Michael Dorsey, a talented but difficult actor who struggles to find work until one showstopping act of desperation lands him the role of a lifetime.

Tickets: $38–$103 are available online at broadwaysanjose.com.

San Jose Center for the Performing Arts, San Jose

23

rd Earth Day Festival 11 am – 3 pm

The Town of Atherton will host an Earth Day Festival featuring speakers, a green vendor fair, electric vehicle showcase, art exhibit, e-bikes, kid-friendly activities, sustainable food, and music. This event will be free and open to the public.

Holbrook-Palmer Park, Atherton

23rd & 24th

Spring DANCE Festival 11 am to 6 pm

Over sixty dance organizations from across the Bay Area (from young

children to professional companies and everything in between) present many styles of dance on the Eastridge festival stage during a free non-stop 7-hour program each day. The professional dance portions of the show are from 12:00noon to 1:00pm and 5:00pm to 6:00pm. Free dance classes will be offered at 11:00am, 1:00pm, 2:00pm and 5:00pm. The celebration is part of Bay Area Dance Week and National Dance Week and showcases the diversity of the Bay Area dance community. FREE. Eastridge Center, San Jose

Waffles, and Wine!

24th Wigs, (A Sunday Drag Brunch) 11:00 am

Sunday Drag Brunch hosted by the one-and-only WooWoo Monroe!

Wigs, Waffles, and Wine presents gorgeous drag queens performing to your favorite songs, while interacting with the crowd, and making plenty of irreverent jokes—all while the audience enjoys waffle creations, gourmet hotdogs, mimosas, champagne, and wine “cock”tails. Adults only… eighteen and up. Visit the website to check out the Dining Combos, A La Carte Items, and Wine and Beverage Options. Must be 18 years or older to attend. Tickets: Admission: $25 (includes bottomless OJ). Admission Plus Dining: $35 to $40. Online tickets and menus at sanjoseplayhouse.org/ wigs-waffles-wine.

3Below Theaters & Café, San Jose M

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FE ATURE

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photos by Nadine Priestley

Gamble Garden GAMBL E G A RDEN S P R IN G TO U R V OLUN T E E RS A RE D E L I GH TE D TO WEL C OM E B A C K TH E P U BL IC on Friday April 22 and Saturday April 23, 2022, for in-person garden experiences that are sure to delight. Enthusiastic homeowners and innovative designers have created five enchanting private gardens which you can visit and take inspiration for creating your own garden oasis. "Every robin loves a garden, and I chose Gamble Garden for its beautiful garden rooms, and the people I volunteer with and meet in the garden. Come and join us!" says co-chair Robin Allen.

Gamble’s signature sale, ‘Over the Garden Fence,’ is a not to be missed curated shopping experience and complimented by an array of over thirty fabulous vendors.

An eclectic silent auction at the historic Gamble Garden on Churchill Avenue in the heart of Old Palo Alto is also planned for Spring Tour. Stop by on April 22 - 23 from 10:00 a.m. - 4:00 p.m. and bid to win. On both days, food and beverage offerings will be available. For more information see Gamble website. The Gamble property is open to the public and access is free, no ticket required to attend the festivities at Gamble Garden, however, tickets are required for the tour of the five gardens.

Co-chair Debbie Benson says, “From the abundance of activities on the Gamble property to the beautiful, unusual, or whimsical private gardens, Spring Tour is simply the most delightful tradition to welcome spring, and I love to see visitors savoring every minute!”

Gamble Garden invites you to join us and

delight in five incredibly special and diverse private Palo Alto gardens.

‘A Sense of Place’: Designed by Arterra Landscape Architects this sophisticated garden was designed to complement a historic 1930’s Spanish home while reflecting the homeowners’ modern lifestyle.The updated landscape preserves its park-like beauty through a sequence of outdoor spaces that progress from formal to informal as it moves outward from the house.

‘Whimsical Cottage’: This homeowner grew up touring botanical gardens and influenced by working at her father’s landscape architecture firm. When it came time to redo her yard, landscape architect John Black was given free rein to create a beautiful garden with multiple points of visual interest, using drought-tolerant landscaping.

‘Entertaining Haven’: Built in 1908 and steeped in architectural history, this Federal style home features a majestic Deodar cedar, an expansive manicured front lawn and allée.

Landscape architect Thomas Klope added magnolias and pittosporum to shield a side yard from the hustle and bustle of busy University Avenue. A solar heated pool and pool house provide amenities for adult gatherings and teen hangouts.

‘Zen Palette’: Purchased intending to remodel, the homeowners ended up doing a complete rebuild. Sutro Architects, Ground Studio Landscape

Architecture, and Fox Landscaping created a modern sanctuary in a monochromatic palette that combines elegance with active play and family living. Unexpected, an in-ground trampoline and zip line are seamlessly incorporated into the landscape, making this a place for fun.

‘Palo Alto Classic’: A sense of sanctuary, a love of nature, and an appreciation for classic style are reflected throughout this 1920’s home. Maintaining the home’s style and charm was a key factor when considering changes so the homeowners enlisted the help of Catherine Garber from Fergus Garber Architects. English laurel screens the front garden from traffic while roses and other blooms are planted to enjoy the sun. A pool, fountain, and fire pit serve as focal points for the backyard, drawing friends and family outdoors to gather and enjoy.

From Gamble Garden you can easily walk to two of the gardens located at Coleridge and at Lowell. The other three gardens are minutes away by car and not much further for those who enjoy a longer walk in the city's quiet, beautiful streets.᯽

Fergus Garber Architects is the year-round premier sponsor of Gamble Garden.

Organization: Gamble Garden Event: Gamble Garden Spring Tour 2022 Date: Friday April 22nd & Saturday April 23rd Hours: 10 am - 4 pm

Where: Gamble Garden, 1431 Waverley Street, Palo Alto, CA 94301 (650) 329-1356 Information, Tickets, and Registration: gamblegarden.org/springtour

nachos, morning, noon & night

Who doesn’t love the ultimate snack of crunchy corn chips topped with gooey cheese, savory beans, and spicy salsa and jalapenos? Wouldn’t it be great if you could enjoy tasty versions for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Well, you can! Try these tasty recipes from Nachos for Dinner: Surprising Sheet Pan Meals the Whole Family Will Love! by Dan Whalen and enjoy delicious nachos all day long!

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FOOD

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Chicken and Waffle Nachos

Cobb Salad Nachos

When I was first developing this recipe, I wanted to put the chicken on the waffles, but it wasn’t really working out. Once I realized that the chicken serves as a chip in its own way, it all came together for me.

I use frozen chicken strips and waffles for this and have zero shame about it—it makes these nachos pretty effortless. Besides, most waffle irons make waffles that are too thick to serve as chips, and the frozen kind just work so perfectly. That said, if you want to try making these with your favorite homemade waffles and chicken tenders, be my guest (and let me know how it turns out)!

When I set out to nachofy a Cobb salad, I was a little worried about topping chips with hard-boiled egg—would it be good? But the classic Cobb combo didn’t let me down. How could a combination of rich hard-boiled eggs, crispy bacon, creamy avocado, and cool tomato not be good? The essential nacho interplay of cold and hot ingredients is really on display here!

Makes 4 servings for dinner, or 8 as an appetizer

Takes about 20 minutes

Takes about 55 minutes

1 bag (12 ounces) tortilla chips (about 90 chips) 1½ cups (6 ounces) shredded Jack cheese 5 slices bacon, cooked and crumbled 1 cup chopped Grilled Chicken 10 cherry tomatoes, quartered ¾ cup (3 ounces) crumbled blue cheese 2 large, hard-boiled eggs, peeled and diced 1 ripe avocado, pitted, peeled, and diced

What You’ll Need

1 bag (25 ounces) frozen breaded chicken strips 20 frozen waffles, halved 1 cup (4 ounces) shredded cheddar cheese 1 cup (4 ounces) shredded Jack cheese About 20 pickled jalapeño slices 2 scallions, trimmed and green and white parts sliced 1/2 cup maple syrup 1/4 cup hot sauce

How to Make It

1. Cook the chicken according to the package directions (breaking up any large pieces so the pieces are all about the same size).

2. Meanwhile, cook the waffles according to the package directions, adding 1 to 2 minutes to the cooking time so they get crunchy.

3. Preheat the oven to 500°F with a rack in the center.

4. Arrange the waffles in an even layer on a sheet pan, overlapping them as little as possible. Top with the chicken, distributing it evenly, then add the cheddar and Jack cheeses and jalapeño slices.

5. Bake until the cheeses have melted, about 5 minutes. Remove from the oven.

6. Top the nachos with the scallions, syrup, and hot sauce. Serve hot.

Makes 4 servings for dinner, or 8 as an appetizer

What You’ll Need

How to Make It

1. Preheat the broiler to low with a rack about 4 inches from the heat.

2. Arrange the tortilla chips evenly on a sheet pan, overlapping them as little as possible.

3. Top the chips evenly with the Jack cheese. Next sprinkle on the bacon, then the chicken, and then the tomatoes. Finally, top with the blue cheese.

4. Broil until the Jack cheese has melted, the blue cheese has softened, and the chips are starting to brown, 3 to 5 minutes. (Watch carefully to make sure they don’t burn.)

5. Remove from the oven and top the nachos with the eggs and avocado. Serve hot.

Cheesesteak Nachos Makes 4 servings for dinner, or 8 as an appetizer Takes about 1 hour Cheesesteak flavors lend themselves to nachos really well. The cheese can be a hot topic to cheesesteak purists—some say Cheez Whiz, others say provolone; some say mushrooms or peppers are acceptable, others absolutely not. We start with cheddar as a base and top the nachos with drippy Cheez Whiz to honor what some would argue adds that true Philly flavor. Caramelized onions and pickled peppers for a little brightness are necessary in a cheesesteak.

What You’ll Need

3 medium tablespoons unsalted butter 2 large yellow onions, peeled and diced 1 pound shaved steak 1 tablespoon vegetable oil (optional) Kosher salt and freshly cracked black pepper 1 cup Cheez Whiz 1 bag (12 ounces) tortilla chips (about 90 chips) 1 1/2 cups (6 ounces) shredded cheddar cheese 1/2 cup pickled peppers slices M

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How to Make It

1. Melt the butter in a large frying pan over medium-high heat. Add the onions and stir to coat with the butter.

2. Cook the onions, adjusting the heat as needed—up if they aren’t browning enough or down if onion bits start to burn on the bottom of the pan—until they are a deep brown and reduced in size, about 30 minutes. Remove from the pan and set aside.

3. Turn the heat up to high and add the steak to the pan (with the vegetable oil if needed). Season with salt and pepper. Cook, stirring often and using 2 spatulas to break up the meat, until browned and cooked through, about 10 minutes. Remove from the heat.

4. Preheat the broiler to high with a rack about 4 inches from the heat.

5. Meanwhile, gently warm the Cheez Whiz in a small saucepan over low

heat or in a bowl in the microwave in 10-second increments.

6. Arrange the tortilla chips evenly on a sheet pan, overlapping them as little as possible.

7. Sprinkle the cheese on the chips, distributing it evenly. Next add the steak, followed by the onions and then the pickled peppers. Drizzle the Cheez Whiz over all.

8. Broil until the cheese has melted and the chips are starting to brown, 3 to 5 minutes. (Watch carefully to make sure they don’t burn.) Remove from the oven. Serve hot.᯽ Excerpted from Nachos for Dinner: Surprising Sheet Pan Meals the Whole Family Will Love! by Dan Whalen (Workman Publishing).

Copyright © 2021.

Photographs by Penny De Los Santos.

Planting for Pollinators Top Trees to Plant in the Bay Area

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id you know 85 percent of plants require a pollination by an insect, bird, or other pollinator? Or that bees pollinate more than a third of our fruits and vegetables?

Pollinators are an essential part of our everyday life. Without them, our gardens and the produce section of our grocery stores would look shockingly sparse.

As modern landscapes change bees and other pollinators are fighting to survive. The loss of habitat, host plants, stressors such as pesticides, pathogens, competition with invasives, and the changing climate has led to declines in pollinators worldwide. Luckily, people across the country can create habitat in their own communities by planting native trees.

From our backyard landscapes to public spaces, there are endless opportunities to provide season-long resources for pollinators. While most people think first of planting herbaceous native flowers, trees, too, can make a difference.

One tree can produce thousands of pollen and nectar-rich blooms. In addition, you get the many benefits trees provide, like energy savings and curb appeal, too!

There are many native trees you can add to your property that will look great, benefit you and support pollinators. Here are some trees that benefit pollinators. These trees will thrive in the bay area, help manage stormwater runoff, and so much more.

Top Trees to Attract Pollinators 1. Native Oaks Native oaks, like costal oak, white oak, pin oak, or swamp chestnut oak, provide habitat for pollinators throughout the year. In fact, oak leaves are used as a larval host by more than 500 caterpillar species! The large oak canopies will provide harborage and food for years to come. The tree height depends on variety. Black oak, for instance, can easily grow to a height of 60’ with a spread of 60’ or larger at maturity.

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2. California Buckeye Bumble bees, hummingbirds, flies, and many species of butterfly love this tree’s sweetly fragrant summer-blooming flowers. In fall and winter, after shedding all its leaves and fruit, its silvery smooth bare branches resemble an ethereal piece of artwork glowing in the moonlight. It’s the only buckeye species native to California and is distributed across the state among coastal sage scrub, mixedevergreen forests, and rivers & creeks. It is a large tree growing up to 40’ and is typically multi-trunked. It tolerates clay soil, is drought-tolerant and can take seasonal flooding.

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By A D A M B A K E R , Technical Advisor at The Davey Tree Expert Company

3. Big-leaf Maple Bigleaf or Oregon Maple is a large deciduous tree that can grow 115’ tall. The trunk can get up to a meter in diameter. It produces nice fall color where temperatures become cold enough. It is very fast growing but may be too large for most residential gardens. Its large leaves provide food for many caterpillar species!

4. Pacific Madrone Madrone is a broadleaf evergreen that produces a lot of succulent flowers for pollinators to enjoy. The bright red berries provide visual interest and are great food for birds. The peeling bark and unique canopy architecture make the madrone a great addition to any coastal landscape.

Once you find the right tree, it’s time to plant. While it’s true that the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago, the second best is right now.

Here are best practices for planting trees:  Location, location, location! First, pick a safe spot where

your tree will have room to grow. Take the size of the tree at maturity into consideration. Make sure the tree is planted at least 15’ away, even when fully grown, from above-ground wires, underground pipes or wires, and permanent structures like your roof or garage.

 Dig, dig, dig! Make the planting hole 2-3 times larger than the

root ball. This will allow the new tree’s roots to spread out.

Then position your tree so that the area where the roots meet the trunk is at or slightly above the ground.

 Water, water, water! During the first two weeks, deeply water

every day. Then, water once a week for the first year, while your tree still has its leaves. Be sure to take rainfall into account before watering.

 Mulch, mulch, mulch! Cover the planting hole with 2-3” of

shredded hardwood or leaf mulch, keeping it 2-3” away from the trunk. Do not over mulch the tree or “volcano” mulch.

Once you have picked the perfect tree, keep pollinators coming back by providing proper tree maintenance. Planting a tree is an investment in your property, community and environment that will truly pay off for years to come.᯽

The Davey Tree Expert Company, established in 1880 and headquartered in Kent, Ohio, provides research-driven tree services, grounds maintenance and environmental consulting for residential, utility, commercial and environmental partners in the U.S. and Canada. With 11,000 employees, Davey Tree is the eighth largest employee-owned company in the U.S. Visit www. davey.com to learn more about Davey Tree.

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F E AT U R E

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the aftermath

mental health during the 'e ndemic'

B y D R . A L E N YA G H O U B I ( D R . Y )

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hile the world collectively takes a sigh of relieve, entering in what many call the “endemic,” now is not the time to forego mental health. No one fully understands the toll a crisis takes on an individual until after it is over.

As abruptly as COVID-19 disrupted our lives, it appears that it has vanished just as quickly. As we see our communities slowly returning to life pre-pandemic, we all need to readjust, once again, what the new normal will look like. While things may never fully be the same, many have welcomed seeing smiles as mask mandates were lifted in Santa Clara County on March 2nd. On the other hand, increased anxiety, social distancing, and concerns around not wearing masks in public settings remain. This reality sheds light on a psychological truth, trauma is subjective.

not all trauma is the same.

We all endure hardships, stress, and anxiety, but we do not all respond the same way to such experiences. Some are devasted by losing a job, while another simply moves on as if nothing happened. An individual who was in a car accident may avoid driving for weeks or months, while another may hop back into a car after the incident.

Likewise, there were a vast array of responses related to COVID-19 and all that came with it. For some, it was an inconvenience managed by following public health orders, while for others, it became a source of extreme anxiety, fear, and social isolation. The mental health impact was and continues to be extraordinary.

Past research has shown that rates of depression, anxiety disorders, substance abuse, suicidal tendencies, and post-traumatic stress disorder increase during a natural disaster. Unlike most natural disasters, the pandemic wasn’t a one-time event, that disrupted life and quickly remitted. Rather, it was a prolonged disaster that ebbed and flowed in its severity and impact on our lives. In many ways, collectively, we experienced what mental health professionals refer to as complex trauma. That is, trauma that is reoccurring, invasive, and has wide-ranging, long-term effects on mental health.

So, while not everyone experiences trauma and stress in the same way, research has demonstrated that collectively people’s mental health has significantly declined in the last two-years.

a collective experience.

According to an article from the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) rates of depression, anxiety, substance abuse, domestic violence, child abuse, and suicidal ideation all increased during the pandemic.

Fear of the unknown, social isolation, and job loss all played a major role in negatively impacting people’s mental health. While this information can feel disheartening, a similar trend was observed in people seeking help. Request for mental health treatment, including learning coping skills, medication management, and self-care also all

increased, demonstrating that people were willing to prioritize their mental health.

A Kaiser Permanente study on mental health treatment trends noted the greatest increase in visits were for substance abuse, adjustment disorder, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and psychotic disorder.

Likewise, there was a 42% increase in more addiction clinic visits than the same period in 2019.

The question at hand is, “Will mental health services begin to decrease in light of the endemic?” Unlikely. Here is why.

mental wellness… the new normal.

When we find ourselves in crisis mode, we’re designed to go into crisis management. We identify the present danger and focus solely on tackling that issue. Oftentimes, it’s not until after a crisis has ended that we can fully process the experience and its impact on our physical and mental wellbeing. For many, this can take weeks, month, and even years after the incident to begin to identify the impact.

As such, as we step into the latest phase of COVID-19, that is, the ‘endemic’ we will naturally see increased socialization, improved mood, and mental health, but for many others this will be their subjective experience of their traumatic event ending.

The silver-lining that can be identified during these last two-years is that the stigma attached to mental health issues has significantly decreased. The days of people feeling shamed or embarrassed to discuss their mental health problems are increasingly fading. From celebrities, politicians, and pastors to staff meetings and personal discussions people are talking about mental health. Transparency

and vulnerability are recognized as two important ingredients in achieving wellness. As Brené Brown is famously quoted for saying, “Vulnerability is not weakness; it's our greatest measure of courage,” I applaud those who have demonstrated great courage by showing up and speaking up.

what can we do?

Limitless compassion. While the pandemic’s toll on each person was a unique experience, what we can all do, moving forward, is exercise compassion, empathy, and understanding for the people in our lives. Your position on the pandemic and the restrictions that came with it are irrelevant to your ability to demonstrate compassion for someone who thinks differently than you. In an era, where diversity and differences are celebrated, we can be an example at home, work, and for our community by not demanding that everyone think and behave like us.

Presently, mask mandates have been lifted, but you will see many people still wearing masks when in public or many companies requiring masks to enter

their establishment. It is easy to form an opinion and hold a position on what you think is right or wrong, but when you start from a place of compassion and empathy, you’ll understand that for some people the threat of the pandemic remains. The anxiety, fear, and loss they’ve experienced is still something they are dealing with. It doesn’t require much to understand that we are all doing what is right for our situation.

let compassion rule, for you too.

When we talk about compassion, we often see it from the perspective of extending it to others, but if we’re going to collectively find healing and move forward, we must first extend it to ourselves. The ‘endemic’ is uncharted territory. We are going to make mistakes, we are going to regret decisions, and we are not going to get it right every time. That’s okay. Setting the bar low in the coming months is not only ok but encouraged. Do what works for you. Wear your mask until you feel comfortable to no longer need it. Maintain a small group of friends, until you’re ready to expand your circle.

Continue to work from home, if allowed, until you feel it’s time to return to the office.

You will find your new normal in time. The idea of mental health isn’t dichotomous.

Meaning, it’s not the presence or absence of anxiety. Anxiety, depression, and many other mental health symptoms show up in our lives in varying degrees. Like a volume control knob in a car, symptoms can present as mild, moderate, or server, and can fluctuate between those phases depending on the situation. Giving yourself compassion and grace will allow you to move forward and continue discovering your new normal.

Afterall, you survived a pandemic, is there anything you can’t do?᯽

Dr. Alen Yaghoubi (Dr. Y) has seen firsthand the effects of the pandemic on mental health in both a personal and professional capacity.

As an instructor at San José State University, he offers his students “mental health days” reminding them to prioritize their mental health above their academics. In response to the increased mental health needs found within his own community, Dr. Y opened Inscape Psychological Services, a private practice in Morgan Hill, CA. www.inscape.clientsecure.me

Get New CLIENTS NOW!

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TRANQ UIL ITY

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Spiritual Gardening Growing Consciousness

Excerpt from Growing Consciousness: The Gardener's Guide to Seeding the Soul

By L E O C A R V E R

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INCE THE BEGINNING OF HUMANKIND, WE H AV E S E A R C H E D F O R THE ORIGIN OF OUR E X I S T E N C E . Some may call

it God, or the Divine Source, and some attribute the beginning of this reality to a Big Bang cosmic event, while others may not bother to even ask the question. However, it is undeniable that something seeded our universe, and that creative act has led to this very moment and will continue in this way. Life in perpetual expression. It can be agreed that a seed contains infinite potential—potential for any possibility once it has found fertile soil and favorable conditions for life. This potential exists long before any action is taken, held within the seed body, waiting and ready to be unlocked.

Spiritual gardening connects us on a journey toward unlocked potential. It is the source of the expanded awareness of ourselves and our gardens that we are growing into. We can gain personal insight about the nature of a seed when thought of in this way.

We will approach consciousness as a seed and provide it with the elements that it needs to grow. Your garden will come to be more than just a plot of land, or a few pots or raised beds. You will know how your garden can connect you to life more fully. In doing so, it will also take on more significance as a place of nourishment spiritually, mentally, and physically.

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Every moment of life is a seed, and the present moment is always the start of what is to come. We will make use of the mediation and mindfulness to get better acquainted with the present moment. In cultivating greater present-moment awareness, we will plant the seed from which our life may bloom. This is the beginning of how we heighten our gardening experience; this is how we use it to grow consciousness.

Basics of Meditation

Let’s take some time to get clear and centered. This will provide the right mental and spiritual backdrop for soaking up the intentions of spiritual gardening. You may be new to meditation but as you’ll see, it is a valuable tool. Meditation can serve as a way of calibrating our mind-set and energy. If you are not familiar with meditation, here are a few things to note: ● There is no wrong way to meditate.

You will experience one of four scenarios, and believe it or not, none of them is a waste of your time. You will either: ‣ Fall asleep ‣ Stay in silence but feel as if nothing is happening ‣ Go on a mental ride, distracted by your thoughts and emotions ‣ Relax into a peaceful experience

● Meditation is all about you! There is no competition or comparison to made with others. There is no such thing as someone meditating better than you. So, let go of any thoughts of others. ● Be comfortable. Do not feel as if you must sit in a particular position. Certain postures have been scientifically developed over centuries of mediation practice and doctrine, so they definitely have their purposes. However, they are not the main focus of meditation. If sitting cross-legged is not comfortable for you, sit in a chair or with your legs in a more comfortable position. Relaxation is a very important factor to a meditative experience. So, be comfortable, even if this means lying down. Just be aware that our goal in meditation is not to sleep but to experience our inner world with awareness and attention. If you fall asleep, it doesn’t negate the meditation, but ultimately that is not your aim. ● Do your best to let go of your attachment to your thoughts and emotions. This may see difficult at first if you are not accustomed. But don’t worry; just allow the thoughts to come and go. Meditation is about observation, relaxation, and openness. Your mind may try to work through nagging thoughts or occurrences, it may use this this as an opportunity to figure something out, or the mind may present you with underlying background baggage that you weren’t aware of.

● There are many ways to meditate; however, they all are intended to bring you to a place of self-awareness, clarity, and peacefulness. One cannot accomplish this by going along with the never-ending cascade of thoughts pouring into the mind. So, be still in body and mind. Simply observe without attachment, not giving any thought to your attention. Instead, treat thoughts like clouds floating in a big, open sky, while keeping your focus on the panoramic view that is your inner world.

Now that we have gone over some of the basics of meditation, let’s try it out.

Soul-Seeding Meditation

Begin by finding a comfortable seated position. Once you are settled, close your eyes. Keep your eyes closed and sit as still as possible. Focus your attention on your breath. Begin by pushing out as much air as you can without strain, gently squeezing your diaphragm with the intention of emptying yourself completely—mentally and physically.

This may take a little practice, so give yourself three or four of these deep belly breaths. If it becomes too distracting, simply watch your breathing with full

attention. Visualize the air as it enters through your nose, circulates through your body, and makes its way back up and through the nose. If you are making these into deep belly breaths, try exhaling out with gentle force, allowing the inhale to flow in slowly. Receive the inhalation with gratitude and release the exhalation as an offering. Do this for a few moments and relax into simple observation.

You will notice your mind’s activity. It may be relatively quiet with a feeling of impatience, or it could be violently overactive, unaccustomed to this stillness. It can also be completely peaceful. Let’s release our minds and focus attention on tranquility.

Now, consider your intentions.

What are your goals? If you want to deepen your gardening experience, silently ask yourself this within. If you want to learn ore about yourself and connect with Nature, allow this intention to flow out of your heart.

Whatever your reasons are, be in the present and acknowledge that those intentions were the seed of this very moment.

Now, visualize a vibrant lush bush in front of you. Feel its aliveness. Next, see the plant reverse through its life cycle. Watch it shrink back into a sapling and then to a sprout. Watch the sprout collapse back into a seed. Imagine this seed floating before you. Silently speak your through your heart to this imaginary seed. Hold the vision and say, “Thank you for coming into my life. In me, you will grow.” Repeat this statement as your breathe in five more deep breaths. After the five breaths are complete, release the visual. When you are ready, slowly open your eyes. ᯽ Leo Carver (Dwarn L. Carver, Jr.), has been teaching meditation, yoga, ayurveda, natural herbalism, and other holistic wellness techniques for the past decade. He graduated from The Chopra Center (Dr. Deepak Chopra’s Wellness Education Center) with a certification in Ayurveda and works closely with his wife, keynote Chopra Center speaker Dr. Melissa Carver. Leo is one of the coauthors of Your Roadmap to Purpose, Desire, and Destiny with Karson McGinley, Melissa Eisler, Michelle S. Fondin, and Tris Thorp.

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hello, world.

B y CHRISTINA HOWELL

We’ve managed to have much more success staying booger and cough-free in our house, therefore, more preschool, gymnastics and martial arts classes, swimming, and family gatherings. For us that means smooth, stress-free and quiet conference calls from my kitchen table; more “shoes!” and “door!” and “bye-bye!” requests from the baby; and a tuckered out Tasmanian devil (that even still requires at least three bedtime stories because “I’m three years old,” and laying together til the zzz’s come because “it makes my mind happy when you sleep next to me.”)

For a split second, the weight of the world seemed to lift and allowed me a moment of self-reflection. I’ve come out of this different; I’m a full-time working mom who is still making it through the pandemic, moved my family, suffered loss, potty trained, nursed and took on new adventures at every turn. What did I see at this juncture?

Compassion and empathy have entered the chat

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t is April 2022 and - *phew* - we are emerging from the deep throes of a two-year pandemic, hoping to see the last of overused words such as “unprecedented,” “shelter-in-place,” “shutdown,” and … COVID. We’ve all weathered some of the darkest moments of our lives in these two years, but have also learned the true meaning of resilience, adapting, air frying, self-care, and streaming television.

Emerging from this long, dark hibernation, is me, staring head-on at a “big” birthday, along with my (almost) newly potty-trained three-year-old, my now running and yelling 1.5-year-old, and an all-things-considered, pretty cool yet sometimes hormonal 16 year old.

The boogery, potty-training hell of a winter has made way for quite a bright and promising spring. I just dusted off my 2018 wardrobe and started heading into the office two hours a day, two days a week to re-learn how to be a grown up, speak “adult,” and drive in my car alone listening to all the bad words Spotify has to offer.

I’ve blow dried my hair an equal number of times this month than probably all of the year 2020, and I’m on my third batch of stick-on gel nail polish. I’ve forgotten my laptop charger exactly 75% percent of the time and I’ve gotten locked out of my office once.

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I saw someone who’s a little more careful. Careful with words, careful about speaking without thinking, careful about how what I say might come across judge-y, insensitive, or arrogant. I’m a little less off-thecuff and a little more thoughtful in conversation. I enjoy celebrating every little win with friends and loved ones, but still acknowledge the struggles we’ve endured in one way or another.

Everyone is a perfect parent until they become a parent I saw a candidly humbled mama.

I found the newborn phase easier than expected thanks to a generous maternity leave, happily latched nursers and relatively good sleepers (as my girlfriends would jokingly say, the “larvae” stage).

Then toddlerhood hit. Like a ton of bricks. It was then that I decided I’d rather have sleepless newborn

nights and spend 24 hours of my day as a full-time boob slave than deal with potty training and tantrums. I took back every judge-y thing I ever had the nerve to think before I became a parent. Therapy happened. Lots of research happened. And my outlook is absolutely, 100% different. And I’m so thankful to be able to realize this and give endless props to all the mamas out there, no matter the circumstance.

Be choosy with “me time” I saw someone that actually got stressed out when spending free time out socializing. Oddly one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is that not all “me time” is quality “me time.” You’ve probably been there: dad takes the kids for two hours and you’re standing in the kitchen eating hot Cheetos blankly staring into the pantry wondering what to do next.

Get a pedicure? Go to the gym? Deep clean the bathrooms? Re-arrange the Tupperware? Have lunch with a

friend? If you’re me, you take your hot Cheetos to the couch and watch really bad trash tv shows while scrolling Instagram and playing Candy Crush and before you know it everyone is back and you’ve done nothing.

P.S.

Then comes the time when you have a “day” out with friends, except that it actually takes more out of you than it fulfills you. What you thought would be a fun, mimosafilled mom’s day out turned into a couple of hours of mediocre appetizers and wishing you spent that time plucking your eyebrows or taking a nap. Being thoughtful about meeting my wellness needs resulted in creating a list of things that fill my cups: Financially, Emotionally, Spiritually, Intellectually, Physically, and Occupationally. Now when the time comes, I don’t have to think, I can just pick one of the items I’ve pre-listed on my wellness chart.

Like anything, the ups and downs will always be just that – and along every stage, I learn, grow, and pack something new into my back pocket of survival. I’m in full bloom heading into spring and this “big” birthday.᯽

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I also discovered a newfound rage that emits at each poopy pants accident, backseat sibling car fight and at precisely the third hop-out-of-bed occurrence each night. But we don’t have to talk about that here.

Christina Howell is a tech marketer by day and a writer and communications consultant by night.

She is a regular contributor to the Silicon Valley Kids (SVK) feature section of M Magazine and enjoys adventures with her family, which includes a teenager, a toddler and an infant.

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STUFF

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Baby Showers!

After a long winter’s sleep, spring wakens the earth and brings new life. Celebrate the blooms of the season with our favorite earthfriendly picks for mom, dad, and baby, from newborn to toddler!

Baby Boldly Birth Bags It’s always fun to spoil a soon-to-bemama. Anything that can ease and soothe the physical, emotional, and mental perils of pregnancy is a sure win. Baby Boldly has put together beautiful bags that go from hospital to everyday diaper bag to travel and beyond, equipped with all the bells and whistles, and filled with your desired amount of hospital necessities (and nice-to-haves). Organic and luxurious, designed by mommas for mommas. The Minimalist, $139, www.babyboldly.com

Miniware Children’s Tableware When it comes to feeding little ones with style and sophistication, Miniware has got it covered. Specializing in planet-friendly, biodegradable children’s tableware, you’ll find soothing, neutral tones in a variety of styles, shapes, and sizes to help your little one become a happy and independent eater. Their top selling sippy cup, 1-2-3 Sip!, has a soft silicone straw that feels good on gums and teeth, and helps advance little ones all the way to mastering a real cup. $18, www.miniware.com

wander + roam Reversible Playmats Love the neutral color options, which allow these sophisticated playmats to seamlessly blend into existing décor. Ecofriendly and 100 percent non-toxic, they are perfect for tummy and play time, and also protect hardwood floors and carpets, while protecting baby from tumbles and bumps.

Eight designs available and roll up for easy storage. $189, www.wander-and-roam.com

Cali's Books

The Learning Tower The Original Learning Tower™ provides a secure environment to stimulate a child’s imagination while nurturing their innate desire to be independent.

A great way to get the kids involved in cooking and baking, and for us a really entertaining place for a 3-yearold to eat a snack or even read a book! $199.99, www.littlepartners.com

ATTITUDE Living Is there anything this brand doesn’t do? With the highest quality standards, ATTITUDE aims to reduce plastic by using biodegradable packaging and bulk sizes; plants a tree for every product sold with Eden Reforestation Projects and One Tree Planted; is ECOLOGO-certified; is safe, effective, hypoallergenic; and covers home, personal and pet grooming needs. Treat yourself, home, and baby as well as Mother Earth with their wide selection of cleaning and skincare products. Prices vary, www.attitudeliving.com

We love these interactive books from Cali’s!

Cali’s offers a large collection of sound books which play songs and sounds with titles like Yoga with Music, Jewish Songs, Reggae, and more! They also offer recordable books so you can record your voice reading a story – perfect for creating memories. They also carry books available in different languages, including French, Arabic, Hebrew, and more. There are so many books to choose from – including titles that are just in time for Easter! From $23.99, www.calisbooks.com.

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Excuse me for living

am in bed eating peanut butter out of the jar with a plastic spoon. I was doing so well too.

For weeks I have been waking at 6:00 AM, lighting scented candles, laying out my yoga mat, turning on Amazon Prime and doing yoga with the Waki Yogi videos. I am a beginner and not very flexible, so I modify the moves to avoid self-injury. I am astonished when the yogi bends so that her toes are touching the floor above her head. I try but my legs won’t extend past my hips.

After yoga, I listen to a guided meditation led by a woman with an indistinguishable accent (she pronounces anxiety “angshitty”). It’s a little distracting but her tone is soothing, and I like the sound of the singing bowls in the background.

Meditation is difficult. My thoughts bounce from one thing to another… from project deadlines and laundry to why can’t I focus, and does yoga induce flatulence?

(I heard it does.) I try to focus by staring hard at my eyelids, trying to see through my third eye which gives me a lowgrade headache—clearly, my third eye is blind. So, I transfer my thoughts to my breathing, breathing air into my stomach, expanding my belly. I rest my hands lightly on my abdomen and take deep belly breaths as instructed by the guide.

Breathing is an automatic response; it is a function of our bodies that we never have to think about, like blinking or pumping blood through our veins, but meditative breathing requires intense thought. It is this single-minded fixation on breath that is the key to obliterating all other 30

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thoughts which is the path to bliss. My mind wanders. It takes discipline and practice.

Sometimes I get close to bliss – what might even be nirvana. I am devoid of everything: thought, desire, hatred, dissatisfaction, even love. On the rare occasions that I have reached this brief blissful feeling of … emptiness, I want to stay in that state forever. But it’s fleeting and my thoughts drag me back to my negative stories, fears, anxiety. And the next thing you know, I am in bed eating peanut butter from the jar with a spork. I am disappointed in myself.

For the past few months, I have been working on Myself. I started the yoga, meditation, therapy, journaling, and listening endlessly to selfimprovement and self-love podcasts.

I stopped looking at my phone first thing in the morning. I stopped watching the news and curtailed television-watching altogether, and I seriously cut back on TikTok, a mind-numbing “addiction” developed during Covid. I reduced my meat and alcohol intake, started drinking fresh pressed juice made with handpicked produce from the local farmer’s market. Started reading again, going to bed earlier, expressing gratitude.

I created a spa shower, showering by candlelight while listening to spa music and affirmations. And, most importantly, I stopped overthinking and started observing my emotions before reacting. All of this has greatly improved my emotional IQ lately.

But then, apropos of nothing, I fell off the wagon. A couple of nights ago I ordered Taco Bell and polished off a Crunchwrap and a bean burrito while watching back-toback-to-back episodes of 90 Day Fiancée – a TV trash marathon that lasted well into the night. I don’t even like Taco Bell. Or 90 Day Fiancée, for that matter. But that night I became obsessed with both. For the next few days, I slept in and, as soon as I opened my eyes, I played games on my phone first thing with the television blaring news and nonsense in the background.

What happened? The only thing I can figure is that Working on Myself is just that – work. And I needed a day off. (Or three days off, if we’re counting.) As much as I love this self-work and this new path I am on, I also just wanted to rest. And I really wanted Taco Bell.

But then the guilt set in. Why am I not working on myself? Why am I eating and watching this junk? What’s wrong with me? And then I am so down on myself that I can’t even get up to eat a proper meal – just peanut butter. In bed. With a spork. This is completely contradictory to everything I have been working so hard to do which is self-love and acceptance and being kinder to myself (and others)!

So, here’s the thing: I am going to forgive myself for taking a break, for craving fast food and for binge-watching a few episodes (okay, an entire season) of trashy reality TV! I will get up tomorrow and get back on the wagon. Yoga mat, I see you. And we’ve got a date tomorrow.᯽