The Military Press Newspaper May 1, 2021

WWW.MILITARYPRESS.COM

Volume 47 • Number 5 • May 1, 2022

WOKE is a bunch of

...SHIP! 1975 AMC Pacer www.militarypress.com

1975 Lincoln Continental

If Lincoln were alive today, he’d be turning over in his grave.

The Military Press Newspaper May 1, 2022 – Gerald R. Ford 1

Snake bites can be life-threatening

SNAKE BITE SEASON

gency number immediately.

if the snake is poisonous. Poisonous snakes found in the United States

Cleanse the wound, but do not try to

include rattlesnakes, copperheads,

cut around the fang marks and suck

cottonmouth water moccasins and

out the venom. People who do this

coral snakes. If you see a snake, do

often do more damage than good.

not touch it, but instead, back away

Immobilize the bitten area and keep it

from it slowly.

at the same level as the heart. Do not try to apply a tourniquet.

If you are bitten, remember the color and shape of the snake. This infor-

It’s important for the victim to remain

mation will help medical providers

calm and move as little as possible.

treat you. If you are walking in high

That will help prevent the spread of

water, and you are not sure you have

the poison through the body.

been bitten by a snake, look for a pair

Do not apply ice or flush the wound

of puncture marks at the wound and

with water.

for redness and swelling, as well as severe pain. If bitten by a pit viper

Check the area for sensation, in-

(rattlesnake, copperhead, cotton-

creased skin temperature and red-

mouth): Call 911 or your local emer-

ness before and after bandaging.

Minor swelling and itching can be

hydrocortisone creams. Use only as

treated with cool compresses, over-

directed.

the-counter oral antihistamines or

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WOKE is a Sacrilegious JOKE

By Richard Matz Publisher/writer

In August, the school board passed a measure mandating that teachers and staff refer to students by their preferred pronouns and that students are allowed to choose bathrooms, locker rooms and sports teams based on their gender identity.The measure followed an Aug. 30 ruling from the Virginia Supreme Court, which ruled Loudoun County Public Schools failed to prove a lower court abused its discretion by ordering Loudoun County teacher Tanner Cross reinstated after he was placed on administrative leave in May for criticizing a proposed transgender policy. Citing his religion, Cross gave a viral speech at the May school board meeting asserting his belief that referring to students with pronouns that do not correspond with their biological sex is “lying to a child, it’s abuse to a child, and it’s sinning against our God.” Conservative political commentator Matt Walsh excoriated the Loudoun County school board during their weekly meeting Tuesday for their gender ideology and accused them of being predators.”They only give you 60 seconds to speak, they won’t show the

speakers on the livestream, they make you wear a mask, and all of that after requiring ID and proof of residence to enter,” tweeted Walsh, who is renting a room from a Virginia resident for one dollar to comply with the school board’s demand that all speakers be residents.

“They put up every obstacle they could but I still said my piece.”

“I would thank you all for allowing me to speak to you tonight, but you choose not to allow it, yet here I am,” Walsh said during his hurried remarks to the school board. “Now you only give us 60 seconds, so let me get to the point. You are all child abusers. You prey upon impressionable children and indoctrinate them into your insane ideological cult, a cult which holds many fanatical views, but none so deranged as the idea that boys are girls and girls are boys. “By imposing this vile nonsense on students to the point even of forcing young girls to share locker rooms with boys, you deprive these kids of safety and privacy and something more fundamental, too, which is truth. If education is not grounded in truth, then it is worthless.

Worse, it is poison. You are poison. You are predators.”Walsh alleged the school board attempted to make it difficult for speakers to voice their opinions at the meeting because they know their views are “indefensible.

“A spokesperson for the Loudoun County school board declined to comment regarding Walsh’s appearance.

Once the court system becomes woke, then our nation will never recover. We are on the edge of catastrophe, today.

Did no one in the court stand up for the millions of ‘children’ who enter a locker room expecting a normal modicum of privacy? A child who is mentally confused, a child who flipflops between gender identities, is not well. But this child needs intervention and care. This child should be made to understand that whichever actual biological gender he or she possesses while in attendance at a school (either male or female), it must be taken into account and must be the determinant.

Thusly, that child must, for the sake of all of the ‘other’ students’ privacy, use the locker room which is in accord with that child’s biological gender. The entire student body must NOT lose ‘their’ rights in order to accommodate the untenable wishes of one student. If the student is told they don’t have to attend any class that, afterward, requires using a locker room, then this helps that student. But the school system is NOT set up to accommodate such psychologically confused children.

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That is the bottom line. We must not remove the rights all students share in order to create a special right for one unhealthy student. The Supreme Court Justices know all of this. It is not rocket science. And yet, how many courts have already ruled in favor of trans athletes competing against girls and women? It is a BAD precedent. Beware. Extremists don’t care about your children.

There are only two genders, male and female. Some wish to have relationships within their own sex and that’s their business; some change their “plumbing” and outward appearance, but they’re still the same gender as when they were born. The façade doesn’t change that fact. Children should be taught exclusively that there is only two genders; they don’t even need to know about extremely rare natural hermaphrodites at their tender young age.

The idea that this school board mandated that teachers and staff are required to address students by their preferred pronouns, allow them to decide which bathrooms to use, decide which locker rooms to use, is offensive to any honest thinking moral person. All school boards that teach Woke need to be dismissed.

The Military Press Newspaper May 1, 2022

3

Publishers memoirs

burn that mother down Back in 1973 I was the Vice Pres. in charge of marketing and sales for US Postage a

for the right person “. He then showed

company that owned and operated postage stamp machines throughout the United

him the ad and the check and said “ by

States . I had worked for newspapers all my life starting at the age of 9 years old as

this morning at 8:30 . Lapham said yea,

the way it’s 8:35 he just started working

a paperboy for the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette . My father worked for the Post-Gazette

but you’re still paying them too much

as well and all of my uncles and my grandfather had also worked for newspapers in

offered him commission on top of his

money and you should have never

Pittsburgh Pennsylvania . I guess without ever thinking about it I had printers ink

salary. I was standing outside of his

in my veins and wanted to get back to the newspaper business.

that I overheard the whole conversation!

glass door which was open so he knew When Bill came out of his office as we

I read a classified ad looking for a sales

center about to open in Encinitas and I

just a few dollars more “. I said “ all we

walked away he said “ I’m sorry you had

manager for paper in Solana Beach . I

went into one of the stores and ask who

have to do is shrink the 2 pages down

to hear that conversation Mr.Laphap is

called and talked to the editor of the

was handling their advertising . The lady

and run editorial on the top, sides and

very close with his money. I worked for

SanDiequito Citizen , whose name was

in the store said you’re talking to the

bottom of the ad “. This way You’ll get

the paper about 3 months and increased

Bill Arballo. We had a very pleasant

right person . I explained to her that I

the benefit of the editorial content by all

the revenue by $30,000 and by contract I

conversation and on thursday I met

was from the Solana Beach newspaper

the readers not just those interested in

had 10% commission coming which was

him for an interview . He was impressed

and wanted her to run an ad in the

the ad . She said that’s great , she gave

$3000.

with my back ground , working for the

Citizen . She said that they were already

me the proof and the check for payment

Los Angeles Times and hired me on the

committed to running a double truck

for the double truck .

I was working late one night, it was

spot . My 1st day to start was on monday

( which is 2 pages running together ) in

morning but I went back home to Los

the Coast Dispatch Newspaper.

I showed up Monday morning and met

in the front office but in the back there

Angeles packed my clothes and returned

Mr. Arballo with the double truck ad ,

were six pressman that were working on

She showed me a proof of the ad which

the check and a smile on my face . He

the next morning’s paper. I looked out

was 2 full pages running side-by-side . I

was ecstatic and said “ I knew I did the

the front window and saw this bright

I stayed at a motel and friday morning I

said “ how about I show you a way you

right thing hiring you he then went into

orange glow and thought weird but we

went to the paper picked up a rate card

can have more impact with the 2 pages

the office of Don Lapham’s who was

were only a few doors down from the

and went on the streets to sell some

running in the Dispatch and also run

the publisher and said “ I told you it

Belly Up Cafe which was a nightclub

advertising . There was a new shopping

those same 2 pages in the Citizen for

was well worth paying a little bit more

with a bright neon sign outside . So I

to Solana Beach that same night.

4

about 8 o’clock and I was the only one

The Military Press Newspaper May 1 , 2022 www.militarypress.com

just went back to work and in

long gone across the border into

about 10 min. I smelled smoke .

Mexico . They then said isn’t it a

I then went outside and saw the

coincidence that Mr Lapham had

whole right side and the back of

a new building and presses built

the building was ablaze . I rushed

and almost completed in San

back into the building went to the

Marcus. I said “ do you think the

back and told all the Pressman to

publisher Don Lapham set the fire

get out immediately . I then called

“ they said if he did they’d have a

the fire department went outside

hard time proving it “ .

and noticed the newspaper trucks

We were told to show up and

were right next to the building and foolishly I went back in to find the keys.

work out all of the La Jolla Light the newspaper in La Jolla . When I showed up Lapham told me we

I’m sure all of us at one time or

needed to have a talk . I went

another when we hear about a fire

into a room with him and he

and children and grown-ups died

told me that I was fired . I wasn’t

inside, it’s hard to understand why

surprised because in 3 months

no one just ran inside and save

he never once complimented me

them . But I found out as soon

on the increase in revenue that I

as I ran back into the building to

brought into the paper . I told him

grab the keys to the trucks . I ran

that I had spoken to the arson

into a wall of smoke and it hit me

inspectors and that they thought

like a clap of thunder and I fell

he had the building burned down.

to my knees in total confusion . I

His face got red and he said there

started to crawl to the front door

full of shit and so are you ! I said

realized I was crawling into the

I don’t care what you think just

fire not out of it . There was about

give me the commissions that you

a foot of space between the floor

owe me .

and all the smoke and by looking

He said I don’t owe you anything and even if I did you couldn’t prove . I said I can prove it I have the contract both Bill and you signed , I also had taken out of the morgue ( the morgue is newspaper talk of all the previous issues printed ) the previous 6 months of papers to prove the increase in advertising revenue. I said “ I would tell everyone what the arson inspectors told me..he pulled out his check book and scribble me a check for $3000 dollars , through it at me and said “ here you son of a bitch, get out of here and I hope you go to hell. I said very politely “ thank you Mr Lapham an arson like you will get there way before me and you’d probably enjoy it. I left and immediately started a newspaper in Carlsbad called the Breeze just to put Latham’s paper out of

at the legs of the desks I manage to crawl out the front door . The firemen got there but the building burned to the ground and all that was left standing was the brick walls on the sides of the building .

Needless to say I was devastated but thankful that I was alive.

The next morning I drove over at 7 in the morning to look at the carnage. Not only was the building gone but so were the trucks alongside the building. I saw what I though were 2 firemen but as I talk to them they told me that they were arson inspectors and showed me along the red brick walls that gasoline had been poured on them .

They

said they were almost positive that someone was paid to burn the building down , they said whoever did it was probably

business , which I did !

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The Military Press Newspaper May 1, 2022

5

1975 LINCOLN CONTINENTAL

< US President Gerald Ford

What happened in 1973 Significant News Events 975 In the UK inflation continues to spiral out of control reaching 24.2% the price of Petrol increased by nearly 70% in one year, but the US sees a start back down with US inflation going down to 9.2%, both governments use interest rates as a way of trying to control inflation with the US Federal Reserve at 7.25% and The Bank of England at 11.25%.

Meanwhile one of the true success stories of modern times when Bill Gates and Paul Allen create the company Microsoft. The First of the new hobby computers are starting to appear including Altair 8800 and the

battle for Video recorder standards of VHS and Betamax starts. This is also the year the Vietnam war finally ends.

First disposable Razor, Jimmy Hoffa ex teamsters boss disappears, Suez Canal reopens, Dutch elm disease decimates Elm Trees in UK, The Antarctic Treaty is signed in Washington It was signed by twelve countries.

The Luna 2 spacecraft crashes into the Moon.

The Film Ben-Hur premieres.

First Pictures Of Earth From Space Taken By Explorer 6.

Popular Culture Bruce Springsteen releases his third album, Born To Run, widely regarded as one of the greatest of all time The film version of The Who’s Tommy premiers in London Saturday Night Live debuts on NBC Muhammad Ali beat Joe Fraser in the “Thriller In Manilla” match

Popular Films Jaws The Towering Inferno Benji

1975 RED CORVETTE

1975 CADILLAC COUP DEVILLE 6

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1975 PONTIAC TRANS AM Cost of a gallon of Gas 44 cents Average cost new car$4,250.00 Average Cost of new house $39,300.00 Average Income per year $14,100.00 Average Monthly Rent $200.00 Foster Grant Sun Glasses $5.00 Chevrolet Caprice $4,819 Ford Mustang II $4,105 Oldsmobile Delta 88 Royale $5,626

1975 DODGE DART Young Frankenstein The Godfather Part II Funny Lady Murder on the Orient Express The Return of the Pink Panther Tommy One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

in the sky with Diamonds “ Kiss Led Zeppelin John Lennon

Popular Singers Aerosmith Black Sabbath Chicago Bob Dylan David Bowie with “ Fame “ Alice Cooper The Eagles with “ Best of My Love “ Jefferson Starship Elton John with Island Girl and “ Lucy

1975 LAMBOURGINI 1975 BUICK CONVERTIBLE

1975 CHEVY BLAZER

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The Military Press Newspaper May 1, 2022

7

FAST FOOD DISCOUNTS FOR MILITARY

Longhorn Steakhouse –

Schlotzsky’s –

The Melting Pot –

Shoney’s – Sizzler –

Mrs. Fields –

Skyline Chili –

O’Charleys –

Smashburger –

Perkins Restaurant And

Souplantation and Sweet

Bakery –

Tomatoes –

Pia Pit –

Taco Cabana –

Pizza Hut –

Texas Roadhouse –

Pizza Ranch –

Uno Pizzeria & Grill –

Planet Hollywood –

Wetzel’s Pretzels –

Popeyes – .

Whataburger –

Port Of Subs –

Wienerschnitzel –

Red lobster –

Zaxby’s –

Romano’s Macaroni Grill –

Belly Fat

Round Table Pizza – .

57 Restaurants That Offer Military Discounts

FAST FOOD RESTAURANTS WITH SENIOR DISCOUNTS

If the military person active or inactive has some type of ID, they get 10% off year around

8

A & W Restaurants –.

Denny’s –

Arby’s –

Dunkin Donuts –

Baja Fresh –

Fatburger –

Baskin-Robbins –

Freddy’s Frozen Custard &

Bennigans –

Steakburger

Bob Evans –

Fuddruckers –

Bojangles –

Godfathers Pizza –

Boston Market –

Golden Chick –

Bubba Gump Shrimp –

Hardees –

Carl’s Jr. (aka Hardees) –

Hooters –

Chesters – a 25% military

Hwy 55 Burgers Shakes &

A&W

Dairy Queen

discount.

Fries –

Chili’s –

Jersey Mikes –

Burger King

Subway

Chuck E Cheese –

Johnny Rockets –

Taco Bell

Arby’s

Cici’s –

Logans Roadhouse –

Jack in the Box

Carl’s Jr.

Dave And Busters –

Long John Silvers –

Popeye’s

Chick-fil-A

Just ask For Senior Discount

The Military Press Newspaper May 1 , 2022 www.militarypress.com

WALT’S DISNEYLAND? Disney diversity and inclusion manager Vivian Ware says the company has eliminated all mentions of “ladies,” “gentlemen,” “boys,” and “girls” in its theme parks in order to create “that magical moment” for children who do not identify with traditional gender roles.

TEXAS ILLEGAL TEXAS CLAIMS A WIN AFTER GOV. ABBOTT PLEDGED TO BUS ILLEGALS TO WASHINGTON

A bus from Texas arrived in Washington, D.C. Wednesday morning, transporting dozens of illegal immigrants as part of Texas Gov. Greg Abbott’s new plan to counter federal immigration policies during an ongoing border crisis.

Abbott announced last week that he was directing the Texas Division of Emergency Management (TDEM) to transport migrants released from federal custody in Texas to the nation’s capital and other locations outside his state.

Just another example of sacrificing the masses for lest then 1% of our population .

If alive what would Walt have done ?

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9

sports news

THE UNBEATABLE THREE

MAGIC - JORDAN - BIRD

A few weeks ago, Michael Jordan sort of took a shot at James saying that back

Angeles Lakers and Bird’s Boston Celtics aren’t so great either.

in his playing days, he wouldn’t have

Imagine Jordan getting together with

called up Magic Johnson and Larry Bird

Magic and Bird to hold a free agent

to see if they wanted to play for the

“summit”, something he, of course, said

same team.

he wouldn’t have done.

“In all honesty, I was trying to beat those guys,” Jordan said.

They just might have went 82-0 a couple of times.

Since this is a hypothetical article, let’s also pretend that Magic doesn’t get H.I.V. and retire in ‘91, and Bird doesn’t

Later, then-Lakers’ general manager

That’s easy for Jordan to say since he

Jerry West clears up a ton of cap space

didn’t have the same opportunity that

and pulls off the impossible by re-

James had.

signing Magic and reeling in Jordan and

But what if Jordan did have the

kinds of unbreakable records.

Bird as well.

opportunity?

get bothered by chronic back problems which forced him to call it quits in ‘92.

The “Big Three” of Jordan, Magic, and Bird likely would have won several championships, maybe five or six in a

Just think what could have happened

row. Who was going to stop them?

What if NBA free agency in the 1980s

if those three legendary NBA stars had

was similar to how it is today? Let’s say

played for the same team. Sure, they

Nobody, but then again, you never

Jordan, Magic, and Bird all became free

were teammates on the Dream Team

know if another Hall of Fame trio would

agents in the summer of 1987 just like

which brought home an Olympic gold

have been assembled somewhere down

James, Wade, and Bosh did in 2010

medal in 1992, but that was different.

the road. We just might have seen a Charles Barkley-Patrick Ewing-Clyde

Jordan grows tired of playing for

Speaking of different, that’s exactly

the Chicago Bulls, a team he feels has

what the NBA would’ve been. The

Okay, enough with all the hypothetical

no chance of winning a title anytime

Jordan-Magic-Bird Lakers would have

talk. It’s just interesting to wonder

soon. And let’s say that both Magic’s Los

likely become a powerhouse, setting all

“what if”.

10

Drexler trio come together.

Publisher/Editor: Richard T. Matz Assisatant Editor: Lisa Matz Design: Trevor Watson Distribution: Dennis Wink Contribiuting Writers: Doug Aguillard, Art Garcia Contact Us: Tel 858-537-2280 333 S. Juniper St., Suite 103 Escondido, CA 92025 Distribution: Distributed on the 1st of each month. Available aboard all San Diego County Military Bases, Onboard in-port ships, at participating Albertsons, Ralphs, CVS Pharmacies and 7-11s.

The Military Press Newspaper May 1 , 2022 www.militarypress.com

Nothing But The Truth Anniversary Party At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.” Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out.

Johnny’s mother greets him at home, and he tells her, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.” Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.” The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.”

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, “I know the whole truth.”

The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, “Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!”

Romp With Teacher After picking her son up from school one day, the mother asks him what he did at school. The kid replies, “I had sex 3 times with my teacher.” She gets so mad that when they get home, she orders him to go straight to his room. When the father returns home that evening, the mother angrily tells him the news of what their son had done. As the father hears the news, a huge grin spreads across his face. He walks to his son’s room and asks him what happened at school, the son tells him, “I had sex 3 times with my teacher.” The father goes back down stairs and said to the mother cook that boy up a hugh supper he must be plumtuckered out !

John and Mary were celebrating their twenty-fifth anniversary. After the guests left, Mary looked at John and poked him real hard in the shoulder. “That’s for twenty- five years of bad sex Join then poked Mary in the shoulder and said “ that’s for knowing the difference !

Super Sex For his 90th birthday a man’s friends decided to give him a visit from an expensive, high-class call girl. The evening of his birthday, she appeared at his door, and when he opened the door she said, “Happy Birthday! Your friends have sent you a gift! I’m here to bring you super sex. So what will it be?” The man thought for a moment, and then he said, “Sweetie, at my age, I think I’ll have the soup.”

Rednecks If you go to family reunions to pick up girls, guess what? You just might be a Redneck!”

“If your daddy walks you to school because you’re both in the same grade, guess what? You just might be a Redneck!”

How Many Rednecks Does It Take To Eat A Possum?

Two. One to eat, and one to watch for cars.

How Can You Tell If A Redneck Is Married?

There are tobacco spit stains on both sides of his pickup truck.

How Do You Know The Toothbrush Was Invented By A Redneck?

Anyone else would have called it a “teethbrush.”

Did You Hear About The New 3 Million Dollar Tennesse Lottery The winner gets 3 dollars a year for a million years.

Redneck goes down the street to a 24hour grocery store. When he got there, the guy was locking the front door. He said, “Hey! The sign says you’re open 24 hours.” He Said, “Yes, but not in a row!”

Doctors Patient: “Where exactly are you taking me, doctor?”

Doctor: “To the morgue.”

Patient: “What? But I’m not dead yet!”

Doctor: “And we’re not there yet.”

Doctor: “I have good and bad news.”

Patient: “Give me the good news first.”

Doctor: “Your test results are back, and you have only two days to live.”

Patient: “That’s the good news? What’s the bad news?”

Doctor: “I’ve been trying to reach you for two days.”

Hanukkah Guilt A Jewish mother gives her son two ties on the first night of Hanukkah. The following morning, when he comes down for breakfast, he is wearing one of them. The mom says, “What’s the matter- you didn’t like the other one?”

Mothers and Sons Three older Jewish women, sitting on a bench in Miami. First one boasts, “I have such a wonnerful son. You know what he did for mine seventy-fifth birthday?

Chartered an airplane. Got all my friends from Great Neck, flew them down here for a party at the Fontainebleau Hotel…

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in the grand ballroom! They made a chopped liver look like a svan! . What a nize boy.”

Second lady says, “Well, you have a nize son, but let me tell you about my boy.

Took me around the vorld onna cruise….

Princess Line, two wholes weeks…. Ve Played shuffleboard on the deck…. We sat at the captain’s table. Parties every night. Such a great kid.”

Third lady: “Vell, you have nize boy and you have a nize boy, but let me tell you about my zon Marvin. He live in New York City. He zees a psychiatrist tree times a veek…two hun’dred dollars an hour…and all he talks about is me!”

Sports Fans A Giants fan, a Padre fan, and a Dodger fan are climbing a mountain and arguing about who loves his team more. The Giants fan insists he’s the most loyal.

“This is for San Francisco he yells and jumps off the side of the mountain. Not to be outdone, the Padres fan is next to profess his love for his team. He yells, “This is for San Diego!” and pushes the Dodger fan off the mountain.

Church Services An elderly couple was attending a church service. The lady turned towards her husband and said ‘‘I just let out a really long silent fart. What should I do?’’ The man smiled and said to her ‘‘honey, your hearing aid needs a battery replacement.’’

Stop It! A dad tells his son “Stop masturbating! if you do it too long you will go blind.” The son replied “Dad, I’m over here.

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