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Class of 2024
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Starts school
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Publisher James M. Connors MANAGing Editor Ena Sellers
High school sports seasons
contributing Editors Sarah Anderson Amy Binkley Jessie Heath
4
Pitch a tent, not a fit
26
Fall means fun
8
unhealthy homework habits
27
Halloween
are you a walking wallet?
28
Clip your way to savings
impressionable?
30
Immunizations
31
How to avoid credit hassles
33
Talking to kids about the dangers of alcohol
9 10 11
Celebrate fun family holidays
12
Taking a pass on kids music
14
improving school performance
17
Finding the funds
20
fall 2011 Cover entries
21
Treat depression drug free
22
why you shouldn’t spank your kids
23
build your child’s problem solving skills
24
The new kid
on the cover Featured Ariyana White Photo courtesy of Diane White
Military Parent disclaimer Military Parent Magazine is published by Landmark Military Newspapers of N.C., a private enterprise not connected with the DoD or the U.S. Marine Corps. The appearance of advertising in this publication does not constitute endorsement of these products or services by the DoD, the U.S. Marine Corps, or Landmark Military Newspapers of N.C. Everything advertised in this publication shall be made available for purchase, use or patronage without regard to race, color, religion, sex, national origin, age, marital status, physical handicap, political affiliation, or any other nonmerit factor of the purchaser, user, or patron. If a violation or rejection of this equal opportunity policy by an advertiser is confirmed, the publisher shall refuse to print advertising from that source until the violation is corrected. The editorial content of this publication is the responsibility of Landmark Military Newspapers of N.C. For distribution and advertising inquiries, call 347-9624.
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When plans get changed, pitch a tent, not a fit Story by Michelle Galvez
A
s the planner of our family, I had packed our summer calendar full of activities, pool memberships, day camps, vacation bible school, and trips to include camping, Disney and 20th reunion.
As a military spouse, I always have a contingency plan for when the plan always goes awry. We are used to vacationing solo, having the kindergartner be the only man of the house and posting pictures of every activity online for my husband to share from wherever he might be. I’d already booked the campsite, rented the pop-up trailer and bought the bug spray when my spouse informed us of his latest schedule change and trip overseas. Impulsively, I decided that we’d go anyway. I might not be able to handle towing a trailer, but I had been a Girl Scout, I could pitch a tent and build a fire. Right? So when the Camp Host wandered over to inspect my middle-of-a-rainstorm tent pitching skills and asked “uh, will a Mr. Galvez be along soon?” my reaction was to smile sweetly and think, “why, does it look like I need a
4 Fall 2011
| Military Parent
man to go camping with my kids?” Ironically, when I told my friends this story after our woodsy adventure, their first reaction was of one of alarm for my safety not my pride. In the weeks leading up to the camping trip, I’d been increasingly overwhelmed, overburdened and overstressed due to work, graduate school, my impressive summer schedule and single parenting. By the time the weekend was over, I was marveling at how refreshed, relaxed and recharged I was. Amazing and unexpected feeling given that I’d spent three days trapped in a tent with my three children, most of it in the rain, without: any cell service (incredibly bad news for my teenage texter), our microwave, my make up and bug-free showers. But that’s also because there were no distractions. I even forgot to pack my book. But for the first time in a long time I was able to give my children my undivided attention and we all needed that. We hiked, mountain biked,
swam, boated, cooked over an open fire, made s’mores and didn’t take a bath for two days, learned about local flora, fauna and animals and thoroughly enjoyed each other’s company. My kids got along amazingly well, caught fireflies, and discovered peace and quiet. The camp host who’d seriously underestimated me and I, who had started to have real doubts about my sanity and solo adventures, realized that a military spouse is quite capable of just about anything when faced with a challenge and an absent husband. And by the way, admission to Virginia State Parks is free for military members and their families through the end of the year. According to Gov. Bob McDonnell, “This is a small gesture of appreciation for the women and men who have given so much to defend our liberty and freedom. There are 327,000 active-duty military personnel, and families. We hope many will take advantage of this opportunity.” Michelle Galvez is a Navy wife, mother of three, government contractor, and graduate student who is also a journalist in her spare time.
Home alone? things to keep in mind
Kevin McCallister is the protagonist of the iconic ‘90s movie, “Home Alone.” Kevin, 8, is mistakenly left at home during the Christmas season after his family flies to France to celebrate the holiday. Kevin must defend his home against bumbling burglars and generally fend for himself. While the premise of “Home Alone” is a humorous one, and Kevin certainly has the smarts to outwit the two foolish thieves and seems relatively self-sufficient, in real life the idea of letting an 8-yearold stay home by himself is one that would no doubt raise an eyebrow. In fact, many states have laws in place that regulate the age at which a child is legally able to stay home alone. Age limits vary according to area and can be verified by contacting one’s local child welfare agency. However, the National SafeKids Campaign recommends that no child under the age of 12 be left at home alone. It is only by the age of 12 or 13
that kids are able to think logically and self-supervise for an extended period of time. Even at this age, it isn’t recommended that pre-teens stay at home alone overnight. With adult supervision children can begin cooking with the oven and the stove top at age 12. Parents may want to wait until the child is 14 before allowing him or her to cook foods unsupervised. Proper training on safety procedures, including how to use a fire extinguisher, should be given before enabling a child to use appliances unattended. The American Academy of Pediatrics Policy states that children under the age of 4 should not be left alone around or in water due to the risk of drowning. Parents can gauge whether a 5- or 6-year-old child is mature enough to shower or bathe on his or her own, since at this time some children experience embarrassment or issues of privacy as they become more aware of their unclothed
bodies. Even if the decision is made to allow unsupervised bathing, parents can regularly check in on the child to ensure that he or she is alright. Leaving the door open or encouraging the child to sing a song so that a parent can hear him or her is another option. Although a teenager may be able to stay alone overnight by age 15 or 16, this decision is entirely subject, and child’s maturity level should carry significant weight in the decisionmaking process. It is also important for parents to realize that laws regarding partying that involve underage drinking often place the responsibility on parents. Parents can think about whether the child is the one who wants to stay home alone overnight or if it’s the parents’ wish to go away sans kids. If the child doesn’t feel comfortable no matter the age, he or she shouldn’t be left alone until they feel comfortable alone. ... Babysit Another Person?
There are no rules governing the acceptable age at which a child can watch another child. The University of Michigan Health System offers guidelines that no child under the age of 12 should be allowed to babysit. Usually by age 14 a child is mature enough to watch a sibling for a little while. Unless the sitter is well known and comes recommended by others, parents may want to insist their babysitters are at least 14 or 15. Leary parents can share childcare duties with other friends who have kids. There is no guidebook for parenting, and many times caregivers must use their own judgement when deciding whether a child is physically and emotionally ready to do many of the things adults take for granted. While there are laws governing when a person can drive or drink alcohol, there are no such guidelines for many other important milestones. Parents often have to use their own discretion.
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Class of 2024 starts school Story and photos by amy binkley
S
ummer’s over, school’s back in session and the class of 2024 is set up for success. The kindergartners of Marine Corps Base Camp Lejeune have begun their educational journey, and they have a whole host of parents, educators and other grown-ups ready to help them. ““We have a lot of first-time school parents here,” said Julie Fulton, school liaison with base schools. “We’re here to answer questions they’re nervous about.” While military parents face deployments, duty stations and hard decisions with ease, sending their children to school can be a big change and an even bigger challenge. “I’m looking forward to seeing him grow,” said Jessica McManus, a military spouse. “I’m also nervous about the challenges he might face. The more resources I can get the better.” Her son, Christian, didn’t seem nervous at all. “I’m going to learn about bones, fossils, dinosaurs, reading, numbers and speaking well,” he explained. Anne Ward, a military spouse, counted down the
6 Fall 2011 | Military Parent
days until school started with her son. “He’s totally excited,” she said. “It’s going to be so much fun for him to learn new things and broaden his horizons.” Sgt. Travis Crayton, Marine Heavy Helicopter Training Squadron 302, 2nd Marine Aircraft Wing, Marine Corps Air Station New River, prepared for his daughter’s first year at school with his family. “I want her to learn new things, but I worry about her being accepted by others,” he said. According to Dwayne Snowden, director of elementary services for Onslow County, these kinds of apprehensions are normal but are easily calmed. “Stay involved and be a part of the school functions,” he advised. “When kids see parents invest, they see how important it is. School is a great place.” As the springboard of their education, all the representatives agreed that behaviors learned in kindergarten are critical. “Kindergarten is the door to their child’s educational career,” said Jessica Huff, director of Onslow County Partnership for Children. “Embracing the experience and child will only
see school 32
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Fall 2011 | Military Parent 7 Summer winter 2011 2010 | Military Parent 7 5
STORY BY JESSIE HEATH Summer is over, school supplies have been bought and lunch boxes have been packed. It’s time to go back to school. Of course, back to school means back to homework. For a lot of kids, homework is the most dreaded word on the planet. Regardless of age or grade, the word homework can strike trepidation in the minds of most kids and teens. It can also strike fear in the minds of parents who know that its time to start wrestling their kids into a chair to do homework. There’s no need to get out the boxing gloves quite yet, though. While homework is rarely fun, it doesn’t have to be a terrible task. To keep homework from being such a dreadul chore, the chains of unhealthy homework habits must, first and foremost, be broken.
Kindergarten teacher Emily Griffith knows how to get kids to do their homework. With more than 15 years of teaching experience under her belt, Griffith knows most of the tricks of the trade when it comes to making sure that learning doesn’t end after the school bell rings. “Homework is obviously an important part of education,” said Griffith, “and kids have to know that it’s their responsibility to get their work done.” One of the common unhealthy homework habits Griffith often sees are parents who complete their child’s homework. Many parents believe that their children cannot complete their homework because they do not understand the assignment. “It’s important for parents to be accessible while a child does his or her homework,” said Griffith. “But they should never complete a child’s homework for them.” If a child comes home with a homework assignment they do not understand, it is a good idea to have them read the assignment aloud. Hearing words, rather than just reading them silently, has been proven to stimulate the brain and increase comprehension. “If your child reads the directions several times and still does not understand them, step in and read through the directions with them,” said Griffith. “After you finish read-
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ing, ask your child what the directions are asking them to do. Have them repeat the task back to you.” On the rare occasion that the instructions for the homework are not clear to either the child or the parent, Griffith suggests calling the school to schedule an appointment with the teacher. Another unhealthy homework habit is asking children to do their homework the moment they get home from school. Griffith suggests letting children play for half an hour before sitting them down to complete their homework. When children do sit down to start their homework, sitting them in a quiet room that is still accessible to the rest of the house is a key to staying focused. “Have a designated homework area,” said Griffith. “It should be a place where everybody in the home does their work.” From preschoolers to high school seniors, stability is the key in getting work done at home. By having a set place where homework takes place, children, teens and even parents learn to associate homework and schoolwork with one particular area of the house. For more tips on helpful homework habits visit www2.ed.gov/parents/academic/involve/homework.
STORY BY TONI GUAGENTI If parents had a dollar for every buck their kid bummed off them, well, they’d have all their money back. Parents don’t have to be walking, talking wallets for their children. There are ways to let your children know that the bank of mom and dad doesn’t come equipped with a 24-hour ATM. “Just say ‘no,’” advises Dr. Leah Bush, chief medical examiner for the city of Norfolk. “You’ve got to draw the line somewhere.” Bush knows that’s easier said then done when dealing with a child. Her 17-year-old daughter, Austin Butler, knows where her mother stands on being an open billfold. According to the experts, children need to be taught the value of money to understand it doesn’t grow on the proverbial trees. Tom Speight, vice president and investment specialist has set up a kids money-market account for his three children. The money-market accounts earn more money than putting it into a savings account in a bank, Speight said, so children can watch their money grow. He uses the account to “teach good financial decisions,” he said.
One tip, according to Yahoo!’s family and home guide is to make saving interesting, like Speight does for his children. Yahoo! suggests plotting a visual chart for children so they can see their savings adding up, and encourage them to establish a goal for something – an item or event they’re saving up for. Help them plan ahead. “Remember to keep it as simple as possible, geared toward each child’s level of understanding,” the Web site says. Another tip is to make sure that children know that money is earned, like how parents earn money to keep households going and to take trips and buy groceries. “Explain to your children that money is earned by working, and that you can only spend what you earn. Try to help them understand what it’s like to get paid on a schedule, begin by paying an allowance.” Dr. Bush wholeheartedly agrees with this advice. She suggested establishing a reasonable allowance for children, maybe $1 plus their age given on a weekly basis, or maybe a bit more, such as $25-30 a week for teenagers, if they’re not buying their own gas for their cars. Kids should have a way to earn more from their parents, like going above and beyond weekly chores that they should have. Weed the garden, wash mom’s car, earn some extra cash, Bush said. At 16, encourage your child to get a part-time job, maybe 15 hours a week, Bush said. Parents don’t want the job to interfere with school, but they do want their children to understand the value of working for a dollar, she said.
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STORY BY JIM VAN SLYKE Play dates stress me out, but only when they concern my 1st grader. I’m perfectly fine with our 3-year-old son going on as many play dates as possible. But when it comes to Aidan, our 1st grader, I’m a bit more particular. My son is at the age where he often knows better, but doesn’t have a part of his brain developed that tells him to listen to the part that knows better. It’s like he has a warning light in his brain that he just ignores until something starts to smoke. He won’t burn anybody’s house down or make you call the police, but it shouldn’t shock you that his mother and I have considered changing his middle name to “Trouble.” But a bigger part of it is you, the parent who invited my son over for a play date. I’m sure you hold down a good job or are a stay-at-home parent who does a fantastic job raising you kids. I’m sure you aren’t smoking crack or living in a den of inequity, but unless you’re willing to submit to random drug screenings, surprise inspections and an oral exam on what Aidan’s mom and I consider good role modeling and parenting skills you are probably out of luck. I don’t think you’re a bad person or that you would intentionally cause any harm to my son. It’s just that my oldest son is soaking up information so fast that we’ve got engineers from Microsoft hovering around our house 24/7 trying to glean
anything from him about how to build the next cloud computer. Aidan’s teacher said “dude” once and Aidan ended every sentence with “dude” for the next four-and-a-half months. At first we liked to pretend we were living with a world-class surfer who happened only be four feet tall. But “Merry Christmas, dude” and “I’m pretty sure those aren’t my boogers on the wall, dude” gets old fast. My wife and I try to model good behavior and speak in volumes that don’t shake the picture frames off the walls. We only walk through the house. We never, ever talk with food in our mouths and we certainly don’t use “dude” to punctuate the end of our sentences. I’m sure you’re a lovely person and that your children will grow up to do great things. I’m just not sure we can afford to take the risk that you might accidentally let a bad word fly. My wife and I would be forced to apologize to teachers, clergy, elderly relatives and the occasional rodeo clown about why Aidan uses words that would make a sailor blush. We realize that at some point we have to escape our bubble and let our son socialize with his peers. We definitely don’t want him to grow up to be the type of teenager who sits at home and does origami on Saturday nights. If you ask nicely, we’ll probably leave our son with you, but you have to promise us one thing: No one in your family can ever say the word “dude.”
STORY BY JESSIE HEATH Fall is a great time to watch the leaves change colors, carve shiny pumpkins and drool over fresh apples. Football comes alive, Halloween costumes are bought and holiday decorations are pulled out of the attic. It is also the time of year when kids start coming in from outside earlier and growing restless as dusk approaches earlier each day. As the days grow cooler and shorter, there are still plenty of ways to help children stay active and entertained without sitting them down in front of the television. With a little quirky knowledge and a positive attitude, fall can be the best time of year to gather the family for quick and easy family fun.
National Good Neighbor Day
Sept. 28 is National Good Neighbor Day, a day that lends itself to the chance to teach your children great lessons about family values. You can start this day on a good note by sitting down with your kids and having a special conversation about the importance of being a good neighbor. Ask your kids what they know about being a good neighbor. Encourage them to share ideas about how they can be neighborly toward the people they come into contact with. Make a card for your neighbor and leave it on their doorstep. If you want to do something a little bigger, bake cookies or call and ask if they would like help with a chore such as raking up leaves or washing the car. Don’t forget that kids model the behavior in front of them, so it is important to do the task with your kids and not just send them outside to do it alone.
Frugal Fun Day
Did you know that the first Saturday in October is Frugal Fun Day? While this day bears no international or national tag to its name, its purpose is clear. Find a cheap – or better yet, free – way to have fun. Gather the family, the balls and the Frisbee and go to the local park for a picnic and family games. If it’s rainy or you don’t
want to go outside, stay indoors and turn your living room into a game room. Play board games, have a potato sack race with pillow cases, pitch a tent… get creative.
Curious Event Day
Oct. 9 is a curious day. Why? It’s Curious Events Day. Curiously enough, there is no history on this topic and it’s unknown if it bears a national or international tag. This day is a great day to celebrate, especially if you have inquisitive children who love to ask questions. Pick any topic that interests your family and discuss it. The topic can be as broad or specific as you want. Question the existence of aliens or try to figure out whether the chicken or the egg came first. The only rule for this day is that the topic in question has to be interesting to you.
World Egg Day
The second Friday in October is World Egg Day. This bizarre holiday is celebrated all over the world, from China to the United Kingdom. The simplest way to celebrate is, of course, eat some eggs. But why not get a little creative? If you have a few eggs to spare, take the kids outside and have an egg toss competition. Sit down with your kids and read “The Goose that Laid the Golden Egg”. Give this day an educational twist by taking your kids into the kitchen and asking them to find as many food products as they can that contain eggs. You might be surprised how many you come up with. November is not without its share of unique holidays. Besides Thanksgiving, there are plenty of days to celebrate with your family.
Young Readers Day
Young Readers Day is the second Tuesday of November, so take advantage by encouraging your family of young readers and not-so-young readers to spend some time with their nose in a book. Young Readers Day is the day to celebrate the special joy and importance of books.
USMC Birthday
Nov. 10 is the birthday of the United States Marine Corps. Looking for a simple way to celebrate? Gather your family and have a contest to see who can give the best “Oorah”.
Universal Children’s Day
Celebrate the children in your family with Universal Children’s Day on Nov. 20. This holiday came about in 1954 as a result of a United Nation’s suggestion that each country should establish a celebration in honor of their children on an appropriate day. While there are many versions of this day that happen throughout the year, the resolution was adopted Nov, 20, 1954. Enjoy your kids. Set aside your chores and play games with them. Do some finger painting. Encourage their creative juices to flow. Write a story together. Take a bike ride, teach them something new and take a family portrait. This is one the best holidays out there and there are so many ways to celebrate.
Play School at Home Night
Pick any weeknight and declare it school night at your house. Sit down in the living room and be your child’s student. Let them teach you anything they want to. Encourage them to share what they learned in school by pretending they are the teacher and you are their student. Let them show you how to make a silly craft or play a fun game. You’ll be amazed at all the things children learn in one day. For more information on bizarre and unique holidays, visit www. holidayinsights.com.
Fall 2011 | Military Parent 11
Taking a pass on
Story by Jim Van Slyke | Courtesy Photos
T
he wheels on the bus have never gone round, round, round in my car. Barney has never crooned “I love you” from the backseat and nobody from Sesame Street has ever helped me or anybody else in my car learn to count. No nursery rhymes or cute baby songs have ever leaked out of the speakers in my car.
OK, there was one time on a long road trip when a CD of kids’ songs somehow found its way into my car’s stereo, but the pain in my ears was so tremendous that I pulled over and ran screaming into the woods. Fortunately, my wife caught me before I did anything really silly. Our boys got enough exposure - I believe - from hearing kids’ songs in my wife’s car as well as at school and even in their bedrooms as they are slowly drifting off into little man dreamland. So I figured I didn’t have to suffer while we were driving around in my car and, at the same time, I could expose them to much better music. I’m proud to say that my children now ask to hear bands like Silversun Pickups and The Who when they get in my car and they would prefer to listen to Johnny Cash and even the blues when we are goofing around at home. I’ve exposed them to
12 Fall 2011 | Military Parent
jazz, country, classical and just about every other musical genre. I love that my boys beg to sing along to Vampire Weekend and Mumford & Sons songs. I grin from ear to ear when they request R.E.M. I get even more excited when Kyle, the 3-yearold, tells me a song “doesn’t rock enough” and that it “needs more guitars.” It’s not that I’m trying to create “mini-mes” when it comes to music. It’s more about me not having to suffer when I’m driving my car. It’s usually the one place where I can control everything. That changes quite a bit when my wife is also in the car - I’m not allowed to touch the climate controls or roll down a window without permission - but when the kids are locked down in the backseat I’m in control. Daddy’s car equals daddy’s music. I honestly think we don’t give our kids enough credit when it comes to exposing them to music. If we don’t make them listen to “Wheels on the Bus” then there is no way they can whine about wanting to listen to it every time they’re strapped into their car seat. Then there is no way for them to want to listen to 57 times in a row while driving from Hampton Roads to Washington, D.C. And if that song isn’t played 57 times in a row there is no way for it to get stuck in a mother and father’s head and make them have nightmares about wheels, busses, bus drivers and the people on the bus going “up
and down.” To be fair, there is kids’ music out there that won’t make kids and adults feel like sticking knitting needles in their ears. Most of the time, it involves a singer-songwriter standing alone on stage or in front of a band. It never includes someone wearing a furry costume or any cartoon characters. Acts such as the Imagination Movers, Dan Zane and, one of our family’s favorites, Robbie Schaefer of Eddie From Ohio fame can be appreciated by both generations. My wife and I love that our children enjoy music as much as we do and that they often host impromptu dance parties in their rooms. Although neither of them
can dance - they must have inherited their dance moves from me. I’m sure at some point, my sons will totally reject my music and they’ll listen to things that will scar my eardrums. It’s part of growing up, and I understand that. Hopefully, I’ve prepared them enough that they can tell the difference between music that I can’t tolerate that is good and music that I can’t tolerate that is actually quite bad. In other words, I’m trying to arm my kids with good musical taste, even if that taste isn’t the same as mine. Hopefully, once they grow up they will appreciate all good music - and by that time “Wheels on the Bus” will finally be out of my head.
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Extracurriculars could help improve school performance Parents and students who want to improve grades and classroom performance may want to look to extracurricular activities. There is evidence that some after-school activities can help promote better results inside of the classroom — even helping to mediate symptoms of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Activities like sports, band, cheerleading, martial arts, among others, can promote good feelings about school and offer lessons that carry over into the classroom environment. A study by the U.S. Department of Education revealed that students who participate in extracurricular activities are three times more likely to have a grade point average of 3.0 or better than students who do not. In a 2003 study published in Sociology of Education, researchers found that there are positive associations between extracurricular participation and academic achievement. Many adolescents who participate
in extracurricular activities report higher grades and higher academic aspirations. Extracurricular activities also may be able to correct behaviors associated with boisterous children or those who have been diagnosed with a clinical medical condition, such as ADHD. In a study titled, “The Effects of Mixed Martial Arts on Behavior of Male Children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder,”
WHILE RATES ARE AT THEIR ALL TIME LOW! researchers found that a martial arts program two times per week helped increase the percentage of completed homework, frequency of following specific classroom rules, improved academic performance and improved classroom preparation of male children ages 8 to 11 with ADHD. There is also evidence that simple physical activity can promote better opportunities for learning. Studies largely
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articipation in high school sports programs is a favorite activity among many high school students. In many instances, scholastic sports seasons mirror the schedules of professional sports leagues, although the school seasons are often shorter. The following scholastic sports schedule applies to most school districts, but athletes in waiting might want to consult their local school just to be sure. Football: Just like the NFL, football tends to be a fall/winter sport. The season may begin shortly after the start of school and last through November. Baseball: This is a spring sport that will start around late March or early April and continue through the rest of the school year. Some teams play even after school is out for the year. Basketball: This is another fall into winter sport. It could start in October and stretch to February if the school makes it into the playoffs. Outdoor track and Field: Outdoor
track and field seasons traditionally start in the early spring, such as March. The season will run into May or the end of the school year. Many other scholastic sports are scheduled according to the school and may not have designated seasons.
These include volleyball, swimming and cheerleading. In general, these sports will be coordinated based on when funding is available. These sports seasons are approximate. It’s best to check with athletic departments for clarification.
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www.facebook.com/Quality.Portraits Fall 2011| Military Parent 15
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16 fall 2011 | Military Parent
Finding the Funds A
ndrea doesn’t have the money for the expensive colleges her soon-to-be high school senior is thinking about attending. She’s not sure if less-expensive schools are in the budget either. She and her husband always had intentions of starting that “college fund,” but she “never got there.” Four children and a mother-in-law living with the family made it challenging; so did the family’s commitment to always buying a house in a great school district when they moved with the military. “We tried to give you so much with the best school districts we could afford - and sometimes couldn’t afford,” she explained to her daughter. “We’ll do our best to help, but you’ll need to investigate scholarships and save your money from your part-time job.” Andrea knows she did all she could, but she can’t help sighing when thinking about what could have been. Financial advisors understand her dilemma: How can you squeeze out savings when you’re already squeezing out every last cent from your budget?
Story by Kristen De Deyn Kirk
Penny by penny Parents can go the route of a good, ol’ fashioned savings account in their name, says Robin Tull, a certified financial planner. While there’s no tax benefit, you’ve at least given conscious thought to saving in a fund specifically for college. Tull and Jonathan Muhlendorf, a certified financial planner, both mention the 529 College Savings Plan as well. “Your investment grows without the burden of tax if the money is used for college and related expenses,” says Muhlendorf. To decide if a 529 in a child’s name is a good idea, parents must first think about whether or not they will qualify for needs-based financial aid from the federal government. “If you could qualify, it’s not in your best interest to save directly for college in the child’s name (with a 529),” says Muhlendorf, who used to run a business called College Funding Solutions. “It’s the worst thing. It will
automatically diminish the amount of needs-based financial aid you’ll qualify for.” Hoping to be financially secure by the time you fill out those college application forms? If that is the case at the time, don’t worry about hurting your chances, because you won’t qualify for the needsbased aid anyway, so a 529 savings plan in a child’s name doesn’t matter. Muhlendorf recommends that parents who might qualify for needs-based financial aid save with Roth IRAs in their names. The Roth can be tapped earlier than usual (generally the holder’s 59 1/2 birthday), if funds are used for higher education. Another option might be a good idea, too: The Virginia College Savings Plan. The Virginia Prepaid Education Program option (one of the four offered) allows you to pre-pay for a state college at today’s rates. You’ll save money, but it’s not perfect. “If the child changes his mind, you’ll only get a minimal interest return on your investment,” explains Tull. Yet, he believes it might be worth the gamble if your children are already showing an interest in a state school and they’re only in middle school. Take care of yourself Retirement funding must be considered, too. Many parents can’t save for both their retirement and college. “ Some will split savings between retirement and college or decide on minimal
savings for college,” says Tull. Try to do something for your college-bound children, but erase any guilt you might feel if you can’t swing it. “You can finance college,” says Muhlendorf. “It’s not possible to finance your retirement.” He suggests saving 15 percent or more of your annual income for retirement. And for college? “At least as much as you spend going out for dinner each month.” To help you reach your college - and retirement - savings goals, you’ll want to think about how to save money on the overall cost of college as well. Andrea likes that her daughter is taking four Advanced Placement classes this coming up school year, which will give her “free” credit for four college classes. She could also consider staying very close to home: “Community college for two years is something people (who maybe thought they wouldn’t) are doing,” says Tull. But he cautions that some children will slide a bit in becoming adults if they go the route of a community college and live at home. He likes to see kids go away to school and learn independence, with the challenges of a bank account, a budget and laundry. The pressure of getting your money’s worth continues once the kids enter college as well: You’ll want to make sure they do their schoolwork once they get to college. “The best way to save at this point, if you haven’t been, is to make your child finish college in four years,” says Muhlendorf. “Tell him you’re only paying for four years. I read recently that the average to complete college is now six.” Fall 2011 | Military Parent 17
20 Fall 2011 | Military Parent
In the past, people suffering from depression were often given two choices – medicate it or deal with it. One expert, however, believes there is a third option. “Those suffering with depression were considered to be self-indulgent and self-obsessed,” said Dr.Gregory Jantz, a licensed mental health counselor and author. “People with depression were often counseled to just ‘cheer up!’ When the ‘get-over-it’ method didn’t seem to work, increasing numbers of sufferers turned to medication. But there is another way, and it doesn’t involve prescription medication.” Jantz’s method is about getting to the root of the disease of depression and fighting it with the same emotions that fuel it. He calls it the Whole-person approach, and it incorporates getting a handle on the following concepts that make up the key elements of our lives. Emotional Influences – We are never far from our feelings and emotions. When depression settles into a person’s life, emotions become confused. Even if life appears to be going well, our emotional balance can become tilted toward depression.
Environmental Influences – We live in a world where complexity greets us every morning. What are we going to wear? What are we going to eat? The assault demands a response and retreating into depression can be that response. Relational Influences – We constantly use relationships to determine our position in life. We use this information to triangulate our state of well being, factoring in what we’ve learned or observed in the past, a view of our present circumstances, and the potential outcome for our future. Physical Influences – In the past, the answer to a broken-down spirit was a pharmaceutical “fix” that relaxed the physical body. But as we learn more and more about the inter-working of mind, body, and spirit, we are learning that the potential exists for our bodies to act as partner in recovery instead of an opponent. Spiritual Influences – Wrestling with questions of worth and purpose are spiritual issues. Who am I? What is my purpose? The spiritual component of a person’s life can provide direction toward both the right questions and the needed answers.
Stay Connected while he’s away with your community website.
• Marine Corps news Coverage of important base news, deployments, local events and more! • event Calendar Search things to do by date or submit your own event for Camp Lejeune and the surrounding community. • searChable Classifieds Find all the local deals in our searchable online classifieds. Place your FREE Trader Ad online…. anytime, from anywhere. • CoMMunity yellow pages Search area businesses close to Camp Lejeune with the most detailed local directory you can find. • arChives Access past issues of The Globe and send articles to friends and family.
fall 2011| Military Parent 21
Abuse survivor offers tips for alternative punishments
E
sther Joseph doesn’t need to read studies or statistics to understand the problems of child abuse. She survived it. Joseph, an advocate against corporal punishment in the home, spent her childhood alternately suffering physical abuse from her mother and emotional abuse from her father. But she doesn’t consider herself a victim. “I’m a survivor of child abuse,” said Joseph “I know the dangers of striking a child to discipline them and then explaining that you’re doing it for their own good and because you love them. All that does is teach the child that violence is an acceptable part of love, and as they grow up, they accept
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violence in their adult relationships because they’ve been taught that it’s completely normal.” Joseph believes that discipline is important, but that it can be delivered without making violence an acceptable part of life. “No matter how out of control a child may be considered, a beating is never an effective way to get their attention, obedience or respect,” she added. “Parents must understand that there are other disciplinary measures, less violent and degrading methods that will garner the results they seek, while raising children to become emotional healthy, and fulfilled adults.” Joseph offered a few simple tips for alternative means of helping children behave.
They include: Be a good example – Parents must live by example, allowing their actions and not just their words to exemplify the kind of person they would like their child to become. Be one step ahead – Don’t wait until your child has done something “wrong” to have a talk with them. Parents can circumvent many foreseeable challenges by addressing them before they become an issue. Be creative – One type of punishment does not work for every child. Parents must figure out and utilize a form of reprimand that would work best for their child’s particular temperament. “Every spanking, no matter how mild, has an impact,” Joseph said.
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O Build your child's problem solving skills
ne of the most important life skills children struggle to learn is problem-solving - the process of identifying a problem, coming up with a solution, and executing it to achieve a desired result. It is a skill that we all use as part of our everyday lives, yet one that most of us struggle with on a daily basis. Encouraging the use of creative activities and games that challenge your children’s problem-solving skills at an early age will help encourage them to become independent thinkers and problem solvers - skills that will benefit them for the rest of their lives. For very young children, simple games such as building blocks that require identifying different shapes is a
great way to start building problem solving skills. As children age, more challenging games are required to build their problem solving abilities and their confidence in taking on greater challenges. One new game that has caught the attention of educators and parents alike is the new Perplexus 3D game maze by Plasmart Inc. Perplexus is a 3-dimensional maze game where players manoeuvre a small marble around challenging barriers inside a large-sized transparent sphere. Unlike traditional flat-surface mazes that are composed of one path, Perplexus challenges player’s problem-solving abilities with numerous paths to choose from and hundreds of barriers to overcome. Players can race each other or the clock. In addition to being an entertaining game, Perplexus is a great tool for cognitive development, encouraging children to exercise their problemsolving, motor and dexterity skills, as well as improving their hand-eye coordination. Perplexus is just as challenging for adults as it is for children.
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Memberships & daily admission do not apply fall 2011 | Military Parent 23
The new kid story by Alison Johnson
B
eing the new kid at school is never easy. Sometimes, it downright stinks - making friends among preexisting social groups, handling new classrooms and, of course, figuring out where to sit in the cafeteria in a sea of unfamiliar faces.
But while the first days of school will always be a bit nerve-wracking, parents and new-students-to-be can do a lot to make life easier, guidance counselors say. High on everyone’s list: get as familiar with the new school as possible before the first bell rings by arranging for a tour, signing up for any summer programs and attending all orientation events. “Go visit the school,” says Ginnie Szczypinski, guidance counselor. “Even if there are no kids there, you can meet people like the nurse, the principal and maybe some teachers. It’s encouraging for kids to know there are adults who have met them.” Getting involved in the community and extra-curricular activities early also is important, whether a child is interested in sports, the arts, service or academic clubs. Families can sign
24 Fall 2011 | Military Parent
up for camps and recreation programs, research school club offerings online and ask about signups at orientation. “Unfortunately, just going to school and attending classes simply does not always provide the necessary opportunities for positive social interaction,” says H. Graham Hudgins, director of guidance and counseling. “There will certainly be cliques and pre-formed groups wherever a new student goes, but getting involved in extracurricular activities is the most sure-fire way to make friends and become a part of a social group.” Joining the wrestling team helped Juanita Pryor’s 15-yearold son, Tim, adjust as a new student at Kempsville High School in Virginia Beach last year. In his early days as a sophomore, Tim sat alone at lunch and even took an extra class to avoid the cafeteria altogether certain days of the week. Wrestling gave him a small group to begin building friendships. “As he got more comfortable with that group, it helped in other situations,” says Pryor, regional programs director for the Armed Services YMCA in Virginia Beach and a Navy wife. “When you start recognizing people, you no longer feel like a total outcast. By Christ-
mas break, he felt like this was home.” Pryor’s other advice: have kids ride the school bus - again to find friends in a smaller setting - schedule fun family activities on weekends before they have new friends, listen closely to help them feel they’re not alone and even give them a little leeway if they’re a bit moodier than normal at home. Understanding each child also is important, Pryor adds; her two other children, 16-yearold James and 10-year-old social butterfly Grace, handle change more easily than Tim. “Grace was friends with the entire neighborhood within two weeks of moving, and James doesn’t care as much about the social world as Tim,” she says. “You can’t expect them all to acclimate at the exact same pace.” Staying on top of academics is another way to help kids feel comfortable, Hudgins says. Buy needed supplies before the first day of school, visit the N.C. Department of Education Web site to see standards of learning for each public school grade level and, for older students, start looking at classroom books in August. “Read over the opening chapters, set up notebooks for each course and purchase a
planner to keep track of assignments, commitments and appointments,” Hudgins advises. “Being well organized and well prepared tends to reduce anxiety significantly.” In Szczypinski’s experience, kids usually settle into a new environment after about 21 days. If they’re still upset and aren’t making friends, she recommends contacting the teacher and guidance counselor. Many schools have programs to help new students and anyone struggling socially or academically, including peer buddy systems. But don’t talk to kids only when they’re tired at the end of the day, she adds: “You might not be getting the total picture. It’s not good to take that conversation and reinforce the anxious feelings by saying, ‘Oh, poor girl, you’re just so sad we had to move.’ You may find from talking to the teacher that she does seem happy at school.” As the weeks go by, nurture new friendships by inviting classmates and neighbors over, stay in contact with teachers, volunteer at school events, follow grades and assignments to make sure a child is on track and offer lots of support at home. “It just takes time,” Pryor says. “My kids are all happy here now.”
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www.CampLejeuneGlobe.com Fall 2011 | Military Parent 25 Summer
BY sarah anderson
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all is usually thought of as a time to kick back, relax, recuperate from the excitement of the summer and prepare for the coming winter. While summer is undoubtedly a hard act to follow, fall’s shorter days give way to cooler, milder temperatures perfect for spending time outdoors, in the woods, on the water or on the beach collecting seas shells and shark teeth. The humidity wanes and the leaves begin to change color, school is back in session and there isn’t a weekend unclaimed by a school function or community event. September through November promises Friday night lights, volleyball and cheer tournaments and kicks off with the 25th Annual North Carolina Seafood Festival, Sept. 30 through Oct. 2 in Morehead City. This is the second largest festival in the state,
admission is free for all ages and entertainment includes carnival rides, live music, vendors, a road race, boat and car show and some of the best seafood in town. Fall is also a great time for a money-saving staycation. A staycation is a vacation you take but you don’t leave your home or immediate area. You are getting away without actually leaving. Not only will you be beating the summer crowds that swarm the white sand inner banks beaches, rates typically drop from their “peak” summer rates into the “off-season” rates in October leading to potential savings of hundreds of dollars. This year, you don’t have to wait idly by for winter to arrive and 2011 to come to a close. In North Carolina, fall is just another season to celebrate.
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BY Sarah Anderson • Courtesy Photos
alloween is one of the world’s oldest holidays and evolves from Celtic, Roman and Christian traditions. As we know it, Halloween began to take its present form in the mid1800s and by the turn of the century, was more focused on community togetherness and entertainment than spirits, religion and witchcraft. Today, the holiday is celebrated every Oct. 31 by the young and young at heart, with costumes, candy and pumpkin carving. What greater opportunity to bond and create fun memories with children of all ages than Halloween? Making costumes, decorating the house and yard with a ghoulish flare, baking cookies, picking out a perfect pumpkin all lead up the ultimate of Halloween traditions – trick-or-treating. Walking door to door and gathering up buckets, baskets and pillowcases of candy is hard for any child to resist daydreaming about days beforehand. In most communities, there will be a designated trick or treat time. Last year, trick-or-
treating amongst base housing was from 5 to 9 p.m. on Marine Corps Base Camp Lejeune, and 5 to 9:30 p.m. on Marine Corps Air Station New River on Sunday, October 31. Trick or treat hours for 2011 are expected to be released in the first weeks of October. Make sure that everyone wears reflective clothing or carries a flashlight at all times. Go only to houses with a porch light turned on. It is also advisable to plan your route beforehand and stay only in familiar neighborhoods. Always have an adult accompany younger children. Halloween is a great opportunity to practice looking both ways before crossing the road and being a smart pedestrian. Walk against traffic to make yourselves as visible as possible. For the older children (12 years of age and older) and adults who love the thrill of a scare, there is Terror Town, a professional haunted house production that is held in Building 88 behind the Hadnot Point 7-Day Store through the week before Halloween. If you are interested in volunteering and helping Terror Town with
construction, make-up, or acting, visit mccslejeune.com/terrortown for more information. Keep a few simple safety rules in mind and your family will have a frightfully wonderful Halloween this year. To stay up to date on this years’ Halloween festivities, visit mccslejeune/events and camplejeuneglobe.com/calendar.
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Story by Amy Binkley Fads have been sweeping the nation for decades – bell bottom jeans, Tupperware parties and the Macarena. While most come and go quickly, others have the sustainability to actually change the mindset of a culture. Couponing is the newest trend to tackle the general public, and, unlike its predecessors, it has staying power. “It’s changing lives pennies at a time,” said Diania Alfonso, a military spouse and founder of Coupon Cadre, a coupon website. Alfonso began her coupon adventure nearly a year ago after losing her job and realizing she was still living like she was getting a paycheck. She embarked on her quest of finding a way to save money while still getting all the necessities for her family of five. Coupons were her answer.
She collected all she could from newspaper inserts and printed several from the internet. “My primary store is the commissary,” she said. “It’s a privilege, not a right, and I save a ton of money there. After I saved $80 on my first couponing trip, my husband was sold on the idea.” Clipping coupons isn’t exactly a new practice. Sunday editions of newspapers have been stuffed with savings for years. However, since the country slipped into recession in 2008, coupons have been a helpful way to cut down on the bills for groceries, toiletries and other everyday items, sometimes in a dramatic way. “Since January 1, I have saved over $1,700 just using coupons, store savings and restaurant coupons,” said Debra Winters, a former military spouse. “I think that’s pretty good. I’ve always liked
saving a buck, and I just love couponing. It’s fun.” While Marines and sailors are protecting the country, their spouses are doing their part to ensure their family is taken care of at home. Couponing has provided a type of income for some families. Veronica Madrid, a military spouse, is new to the couponing game, but the thrill of finding good deals and saving money for her family keeps her diligent in her clipping. “I think it’s all about the hunt in finding savings,” she said. “It’s like putting cash back into your pockets.” Collin Morgan, a military spouse and founder of the couponing website www. Hip2Save.com, has gained national notoriety by sharing deals and coupon secrets to more than 10.5 million visitors see savings 29
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a month. “Military families are on a limited budget,” she said. “Couponing enables (them) to stretch their hard earned dollars further and even add more funds to their savings account or save up for a vacation.” For those new to the coupon world, a simple definition of the phenomenon is matching up coupons with store sales, promotions and rebates to get the lowest price possible. Consumers don’t have to work too hard to find the tickets to treasure. Besides the Sunday papers, coupons are located in magazines, inside products, like cereal boxes, on the back of receipts and, of course, several Internet sites. The information about couponing can be slightly scary for those who live life in an organized chaos, but it’s simpler than it appears. “There are two downfalls to couponing,” said Alfonso. “People either get overwhelmed or they use all of their coupons on items they don’t even need and spend more than they normally would.”
The solution is easy. “Start small,” she said. “Begin with either a dollar amount you want to save, like $20, or a store.” Her biggest piece of advice to those starting their couponing journey is to purchase a binder and baseball card holders that can easily hold any clippings. “I’ve been doing this for almost a year and have saved more than $5,000,” she stated. “I only spend three hours a week gathering coupons. I don’t believe in hoarding, but there’s nothing wrong with stockpiling items you’ll use.” Alfonso noted that by stacking coupons, using both a manufacturer’s and a store coupon for the same purchase, people can save tons of money and sometimes even get free items. “If you can get it free or almost free, why not?” she asked. “Even if you won’t use it, you can donate it.” Commissary shoppers should note
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that even though some coupons may be labeled as military store coupons, the commissary considers them manufacturer coupons which means they cannot be stacked. Since the coupon craze doesn’t seem to be going away any time soon, Alfonso encourages everyone to give it a try. “Chuck your brand for three months and do a coupon boot camp,” she said. “Watch and see how much money you can save.”
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Traveling overseas?
Schedule immunizations with TRICARE BY Kristin Shives • TRICARE Management Activity
TRICARE beneficiaries planning to travel overseas are encouraged to have their immunizations updated. Immunization is an important tool in preventing many diseases. Travelers are often exposed to various viruses and bacteria from airports, airplanes, infected travelers and other countries. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention srecommends travelers of all ages receive vaccinations to protect themselves. CDC has three suggested travel immunization categories: • Routine-protection from diseases still common in other parts of the world, and rarely occurring in the United States. Example: measles and rubella • Recommended-specific vaccines to protect travelers from illnesses present in other parts of the world and to prevent the spread of infectious disease across international borders. Example: Hepatitis A • Required- are certified on a traveler’s immunization card to show a record of the vaccine at customs before entering the country. International Health Regulations require the yellow fever vaccination for travel to certain countries in Sub-Saharan Africa and tropical South America. Necessary immunizations depend on a variety of factors such as the traveler’s age, health status, past immunizations and the destination. Other considerations include whether the traveler is
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pregnant, breastfeeding, traveling with infants or children, or if they have a compromised immune system due to disease such as diabetes or HIV. Beneficiaries traveling overseas should speak with their primary care manager to find out which immunizations are recommended or required for their destination. According to CDC, it’s best to schedule a PCM or provider visit at least four to six weeks before traveling, as many immunizations take time to effectively guard against diseases, and some may require a series of vaccinations. TRICARE covers age-appropriate doses of vaccines recommended by CDC. Immunizations for active-duty family members whose sponsors have permanent change of station orders to overseas locations are also covered. Beneficiaries can check with their PCM or regional health care contractor to find out if the immunization they need is covered. TRICARE wants all beneficiaries to be prepared if they travel overseas. Reviewing vaccination history and getting recommended vaccines are important steps that must not be overlooked. To learn more about TRICARE immunization coverage visit tricare.mil/mybenefit. For more information on travel vaccines, visit cdc. gov/features/travelprotection/. The TRICARE Management Activity administers the worldwide health care plan for 9.6 million eligible beneficiaries of the uniformed services, retirees and their families.
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How college students avoid credit hassles
As hundreds of thousands of parents send their kids off to college, many of them will be wondering if it marks the last time their children will be living under their roofs. According to a study conducted by Twentysomething Inc., a consultant firm specializing in young adults, 85 percent of the class of 2011 will wind up moving back in with mom and dad once they get their degrees. The cause? A combination of a shrinking entry level job market and crushing college loan debt. “The average student accumulates over $23,000 in student loan debt and $4,000 in credit card debt during their years as an undergraduate student,” said Gabe Albarian, a former college student who avoided his own credit crisis during his college years by following a guide for young people who want to escape the pitfalls of credit disaster. “All these stats basically tell the same story: our next generation of college graduates will enter the next phases of their lives in a personal finance hell composed of a combination of crushing debt and poor credit,” added Albarian. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Albarian has composed a few tips aimed specifically at helping those who are just entering college or about to graduate establish and keep a good credit rating.
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Credit card companies love to hammer new students and new graduates with seemingly generous offers of unsecured credit cards. Don’t take the bait. There are other ways to establish credit without opening yourself up to the slippery slope of introductory interest rates that change after 6 months or the temptation to use that credit to live above your means.
Authorized Users
If your parents are financially responsible and pay their bills on time every month, I suggest that you be added as an authorized user on their credit card. Make sure to provide your personal information and social security number to the credit card company so that your credit history report will reflect transactions performed on this account. After you’ve learned how to manage your credit reliably and maintained a responsible payment history, you will receive your own credit card offers. “The bottom line here is that once you have use of a credit card, you want to pay your bills on time, keep your balances low, don’t take on more credit than you need and if you’ve missed a payment you should get current and stay current,” he added. “Good credit can be your best financial friend as you go through life and bad credit can be the ball and chain that drags you down,” said Albarian.
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school from 6 foster their achievements.” Keeping that in mind, Fulton pointed out things parents can do at home to encourage their children in their educational environments. “The main thing kids need to be learning is the literacy (reading) and math awareness,” she said. “(Read) with children and let them see adults reading.” She also advocated parents using math in their everyday conversation, such as the amount on the receipt or the temperature, so children are familiar with numbers. “Studies show that if kids start kindergarten already behind in math, it’s extremely difficult for them to catch even all the way up to fifth grade,” she said. “It’s critical to make them familiar the first year.” High on her list of recommendations are family dinners as often as possible where everyone, including the kids, are encouraged to talk about their day’s activities. “Kids aren’t used to having faceto-face conversations about school,” Fulton clarified. “However, if they’re
distracted by something, like eating, they’re more likely to open up and ultimately will do better in school.” No matter what, change is inevitable, but for the families of MCB Camp Lejeune change is normal. “As military, we have changes all the time,” said Amy Greenselt, director of the FOCUS Project. “This is an adjustment and change for everybody.” Greenselt recommended routines, like steady bedtimes, in order for students to perform better. She also encourages parents to re-
member that their kids are experiencing things for the first time, and it can be exciting for everyone. “Through their eyes, everything is brand new,” she said. For more information, visit www. dodea.edu.
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A
s difficult a discussion as it can be, talking to kids about alcohol is one of the most important discussions a parent can have.
The Century Council, a not-for-profit organization devoted to fighting drunk driving and underage drinking, notes that 39 percent of eighth graders, 58 percent of 10th graders, and 72 percent of 12th graders have reported trying alcohol at least once. To parents, such figures highlight the importance of talking to kids about the dangers of alcohol, and why it’s best to avoid alcohol until it’s legal to drink it. The National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism offers the following tips to parents who are ready to discuss alcohol with their child. Make it a conversation Adults don’t like to be
drinking alcohol because they feel it’s “cool” to do so. Parents can dispel this popular myth by pointing out the falsehoods about alcohol promoted on television, in the movies and in advertisements. When watching a movie or television show with kids where drinking is portrayed, point out certain falsehoods that are commonly portrayed. Explain the long term effects of drinking alcohol while young Alcohol affects a young brain in different ways than it does an adult one. Explain that drinking while the brain is still maturing can lead to longlasting intellectual effects, which can impact how well kids do in school. To learn more about talking to kids about alcohol, visit the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism at www.niaaa.nih.gov.
lectured to and neither do kids, especially teenagers. Kids will be more comfortable during a conversation and are more likely to open up if they are comfortable. Talk to kids about their views on alcohol Ask kids how they feel about drinking and why they think kids drink before they’re legally allowed to do so. Listen closely, and be careful not to interrupt. Doing so will help kids recognize that their parents value and respect their opinions. Share some facts about alcohol Misinformation reigns with respect to alcohol, and adults and children alike are often prone to believing certain myths. However, when discussing alcohol with kids, parents should share some facts to help dispel some of the more common misconceptions about alcohol. Discuss false portrayals of alcohol consumption Many kids start
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Serving Your Family Serving Your Family On The Home Front. On The Home Front.
“Yo hablo español.” “Yo hablo español.”
Christi Christi Ray, Ray, DO DO Board-Certified the American Academy of Family Practice Board-Certified by theby American Academy of Family Practice
Proud To Accept TRICARE Prime & Standard Proud To Accept TRICARE Prime & Standard
Dr.Ray_Globe_halfpgAd0811.indd 1 Dr.Ray_Globe_halfpgAd0811.indd 1
©2011 NHRMC
For same-day or future appointments, call Pender For same-day or future appointments, call Pender PrimaryPrimary Care Care at 910-259-0400 visit penderprimarycare.org. at 910-259-0400 or visitor penderprimarycare.org. Ourisoffice is located at:US 7910 Hwy Suite 117S,120, SuiteRocky 120, Point Rocky Point Our office located at: 7910 HwyUS117S,
©2011 NHRMC
A family physician who all treats allnewborns ages, newborns through geriatric patients, A family physician who treats ages, through geriatric patients, Ray is known her experience and comforting care. She to came to Pender Dr. RayDr. is known for herfor experience and comforting care. She came Pender Care having in theYork NewCity York City Health Department PrimaryPrimary Care having workedworked in the New Health Department and and the Center for Disease in Atlanta. Ray also speaks Spanish. the Center for Disease ControlControl in Atlanta. Dr. RayDr. also speaks Spanish.
8/22/11 2:21 PM 8/22/11 2:21 PM
Pender Primary Care serves families in Coastal Carolina While the days of house calls have come and gone, Pender Primary Care doctors like Dr. Christi Ray still provide dedicated and personal medical services to families in Eastern North Carolina. Pender Primary Care opened in December 2010 and has been making family medicine and treatment available in Rocky Point to the surrounding Jacksonville community. Pender Primary Care accepts TRICARE Prime and regular Tricare Standard. Dr. Ray fell in love with the NC Coastal area and after practicing as a doctor of osteopathic medicine in New York City for eight years, she settled into the lifestyle of coastal Carolina living. With an extensive academic background in medicine and public health, a prior research position with the Center for Disease Control, and almost a decade of experience, Dr. Ray’s patients will always find themselves in good hands. In addition to her knowledge
34 fall 2011 | Military Parent
and experience, Dr. Ray’s enthusiasm for family healthcare is perhaps what makes patients feel most satisfied with their care. “I went into family medicine because I like taking care of families as a whole. I have seen patients from the time they were born and it is amazing to watch them grow and be a part of their life,” says Dr. Ray. For Dr. Ray, practicing family medicine encourages physicians to look at the medical problem and beyond. “Family medicine in general promotes physicians who look at the entire person, not just a disease system. Here at Pender Primary Care we have a great team who really cares about our patients and understands this concept. We are fortunate that this extends out to the support services we receive from Pender Memorial Hospital and New Hanover Medical Center as well,” says Dr. Ray. Pender Primary Care is part of the NHRMC Physician Group,
affiliated with New Hanover Regional Medical Center and Pender Memorial Hospital. Dr. Ray’s background experience has shaped the way that she applies this approach to family medicine. “My background in International Health and Epidemiology has taught me to look not only at the patient but also at their environment. Many times a patient can come into the office with a certain complaint and by thinking outside the box I realize that they are really dealing with an issue that many others would not consider health related. I believe that everyone’s surroundings affect their health,” says Dr. Ray. Along with this realization comes the acknowledgement that all patients and families may not benefit from the same treatments. “International health has taught me a great deal about respecting and understanding different cultures including trying to form a health plan that
fits into each individual’s daily life,” says Dr. Ray. Dr. Ray and Pender Primary Care focus on assisting and educating individuals and the community as a whole. They serve their patients across the entire spectrum of health needs. The practice covers healthcare issues from birth to geriatrics, including women’s health, and routine annual physicals and vaccinations, which are especially important for children. Dr. Ray best sums up the benefit of keeping your family under Pender Primary Care’s wings. “We all believe in continuity of care which helps us get to know our patients better and thereby enables us to provide amazing, compassionate, all around care,” says Dr. Ray. If your family or friends of the family are in search of a health care provider to call home, get to know Pender Primary Care. They’d love to get to know your family today.
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Fall 2011 | Military Parent 35
www.onslow.org The life of a mother. You know what it’s like. So join our blogs at MomTalk. Share your highs, your lows, your triumphs and your eye-rolls. It’s a place where all moms can learn from each other — for our children, and for ourselves.