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Filmmaker-journalist Jose Antonio Vargas champions the undocumenteds p8

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Bad Egg I was in San Jose partying with my girls and let me tell you something. We went to this empty bar, I ordered a White Russian because that drink is delish and the bartender—who was hidden behind a curtain of tattoos, piercings and bangs—rolled his eyes. How rude! But he got me my drink and guess what? They put an egg in it!!!!!! Not like a whole egg, but like a “I'm about to fight Ivan Drago and I need to bulk up with some eggs” egg.

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THE T HE FL FFLY LY

SVNEWS

Small Pond Pond Santa Clar unty’s beleaguer ed finance Claraa Cou County’s beleaguered agency finally got g a little certainty Monday y, when EMIL LY HARRISON walked Monday, EMILY into her office as the permanent chief financial office officerr (CFO). For the last seven months,, Har risoon has ser ved as interim Harrison served CFO after ft Coun CCounty nty t Executive E ti JEFF SMITH booted VINOD SHARMA S out of the job and over to a demo ted rrole ole keeping accounts demoted ffor or V alley Medic cal Center ’s Heal th and Valley Medical Center’s Health Hospitals SSystem. ystem. Sharma was in contr ol control of the finance agency—at a least in theory—while ex-county Super visor Supervisor GE ORGE SHIRAK KA AWA JR. was swiping GEORGE SHIRAKAWA a county char ge car or casino charge cardd ffor vvacations, acations, stea road steakk dinners and road trips. With Sha arma out Sharma and Shir akawaa now Shirakawa They in jail, the coun nty county Did has ffocused ocused onn What? addr essing ““personnel peersonnel addressing and cul tural issues” isssues” cultural SEND TIPS TIPS TTO O FLY@ FL LY Y@ within the fina ance finance METRONEWS. METRONEWS. agency y, Smith told Fly y, agency, Fly, COM COM adding that Ha arrison Harrison has done an ex xcellent excellent job. But Harrison’s Harrisoon’s rise to the thir thirdd most powerful unelected position in the county wass undoubtedly aided by outside cir cum mstances. Namely: No one circumstances. else merited aan n inter view. Ke eping the the interview.

Keeping application pe riod open ffor or just thr ee period three week s, both Sm mith and GAR Y GRA AV VES, weeks, Smith GARY GRAVES, the county’s cchief hief oper ating officer operating (COO), admitte ed that the applicant admitted pond was not well stocked. “We’ve “We’ve had a lot of st trong pools ffor or diff erent strong different positions,”” Gr a aves said. “This one was Graves not a str ong pool.” p P AT TTY CARRILL O, the strong PATTY CARRILLO, county’s admi nistrator ffor or executive administrator rrecruitment ecruitment se ervices, told Fly that the services, minimum peri od of time ffor or a top-flight period job with the co ounty to be advertised county is thr ee week s which is exactly how s, three weeks, long the CFO jjob ob was posted online (Feb. 77-28).

-28). Sm mith could have kept open Smith the applicationn period and hoped ffor or someone othe er than some mid-level other bean counters s, he said, but Har rison counters, Harrison has “been doin ng a good job keeping doing the Boar SSupervisors) visors) and me Boardd (of Super inf ormed.” informed.”

Documenter

THE T TH HE WH WHOLE OLE TRUTH TRUTH Jose An Antonio ntonio V Vargas, argass, left, offers swor a sworn rn testimony in his new film, Documented.

D

Jose Antonio Vargas Vargas a fights cul culture lture undocumented w against und war documented with with film BY B Y CAITLIN Y YOSHIKO OSHIKO KAND KANDIL DIL

W

hen Jose Jose Antonio Vargas V argas turned 16 years old, he did what almost every everry kid kid his age does. does. He He applied for a driver’s driver’s permit. But when he went to the DMV, w DMV V, he received receive ed unexpected unexpected news: the truth about ab bout his immigration immigration status. statu us.

“The “T The woman at the DMV DMV told tolld me m that my green card was was fake,” fa ake,” Vargas Vargas says. says. “And “And that’s thatt’s how I found out that I was h was undocumented.” undocumented.”

Sincee then, V Sinc Vargas, ar a gas, now 33, has grraduated fr graduated from om high scho school ol and ccollege olleege and an nd built a suc successful ccessful journalism ccareer—he a eerr— ar —he h pr profiled ofiled fil d Fac F Facebook eb book k ffounder o ounde der M Z Mark Zuckerberg uck keerberg ffor or the Ne o New ew Y Yorker oorkkeer and w a Pulitzer won Pulitzer Prize with the W Washington aashing ngttoon P o for ost fo or his and others’ coverage coveerage of thee Post V irgginia Tech ir Tech e shootings. shootings. He also b eccame a Virginia became on ne of the most prominent prominent adv vocate a es of one advocates th he nation n’s 11.5 million undo cument nted the nation’s undocumented rresidents, e esidents , when he p enned a first tpenned first-

person p erson essa essay ay in 2011 ffor o or New New York Ne Yoork Times Times i Magazine,, admit Magazine admitting tting t his immigration status st taatus and the ffear eear and anxiet aanxiety ty that has persisted p ersisted sinc sincee the DMV V epiphan epiphany. ny. ““The The more morre I achieved, achieveed d, the more morre scared sccar a ed and depressed depressed I became, became,” Vargas Vaargas wrote. wrote.

“I was waas pr proud oud of my my work, work k, but there there was waas always alw wayys a cloud hanging over oveer it, over over e me. me.”

T Twenty-one wentty-one yyears w eears sin since nce his mother sent him from from the Philippines Philip ppines to live livve with his grandpar grandparents ents in n Mount Mountain ain V iiew, V ar a gas still till do d esn n’t ’t ha h ave fformal ormal o l View, Vargas doesn’t have status. st taatus. While shining a li light ight on the nation n’s chaotic immigra ation p olicyy, nation’s immigration policy, Vargas V aarrggas dir directed ected his first film, fi Documented, Documentted e , which delves delvvees into the eexperiences x eriences of xp undocumented undo cumented immigrants, immigrrants, including including himself ca. a He ccalls alls iimmigration mmigration himself,f, in Americ America. rreform effo orm “the “the most controversial, co ontroveersial, yet yeet least understood understood issue in n America America by by far, far r,” and a premiere prreemiere of his hiis documentary documenttaary will be be shown Monday Mondaay at a San Jose Jose State State U niv niversit e ityy’’s Morris M i Daile D iley A uditorium. di i University’s Dailey Auditorium.

V aarrggas will also rreceive eceivve the th 2014 W illiam i Vargas William ound dation A waard.

Randolph Hearst F Foundation Award.

A ar arggas’ mot ther put him on Att age 12, V Vargas’ mother a plane with a man desc cribed as his uncle described and ccame aame to liv ve with hi is grandpar ents live his grandparents in Mount ain V iieew. He sa ayys he “learned Mountain View. says to ‘sp eak Americ can an’ b aatching eevery ver ey ‘speak American’ byy w watching

sitcom borrowing sitc om and drama and b orrowing eevery ver ey movie from Mountain View mo ovvie fr om m the Mount ain V iiew Public Library.

Librar y”” Byy the time he rreached y. eached high school, Vargas was involved scho ol, V aargas g w as a in nvolv o veed in nearly activity, according eevery veery eextracurricular xtrac x curricular activit ty, ac cording to Pat Pat Hyland, H land, Hyla d Mountain M Mount ain i View Vie i w High Hi h School’s principal.

Scho ol’s pri incipal.

Vargas in Hyland when Vaarrggas confided confided o out he came came ou ut as gay, gaay, and also when he learned thee truth about about his immigration status. st atus. “He said, ‘I need to share sharre something with you, you, o ’” Hyland recalls. rec ecalls a .

“He hesitated hesittat ated a little litttle t bit and said, ‘I don’t don n’’t out so know whatt to do. do.’ He found found o that abruptly th hat it became became a really reeally earthearthshattering shat tttering event eveent ffor or him.” o “There “Th e was “Ther waas no Google, Google l , there ther h e was waas no Wikipedia, Wiikiped dia, there there wasn’t wasn a n’’t an Internet wheree I could wher cou uld type tyype ‘illegal alien,’” Vargas out I was V ar a gas says. saays y . “When I found found o waas undocumented, theree was undo cumeented, ther waas none of that, so I was waas seriously seriiously convinced con nvvinced that I was waas non-Latino the only no on-Latino ‘illegal’ immigrant.”

Complicating Compliccating matters, mattters t , California’s Califfornia o a’s Proposition Pr rop o osition n 187—a ballot initiative initiativve that prevents undocumented pr events e un ndocumented immigrants from fr ro om accessing acccesssing public services, services, such as healthcare healthc are and a education—had educcaation—had been been approved appr oveed by by voters vo oters just three three years yeears earlier, earlier r, setting settttiing an anti-immigrant tone throughout thr oughoutt the state. sttaate.

Vargas’ Vaarrggas’ revelation reveelation didn’t didn n’t ’ change Hyland’ss op opinion Hyland’ pinion of the talented talented student.

“No worries, we’ll through “N o worrie es, we ’ll get thr ough it,” she telling theree ha have always rrecalls ecalls tellin ngg him,, as ther ave alw wayys

delphia Daily News News and at the Philad Philadelphia W aashingt gtoon Post.

Poost. After graduation, g , he Washington rreturned eturned to the Post, Poost, wher wheree he won a Pulit tzzer Priz ze ffor or o his team ’s coverage coveerage Pulitzer Prize team’s 07 V ir i ginia T eech sho otingg. He of the 20 2007 Virginia Tech shooting. mo oveed on to o the Huffingt ton o Post Post o and moved Huffington in 2010 he got g his first ttaste aste ffor or film, o writing the scr sscreenplay eenplaay ffor or The Other Cit o ty, City, a documentary documenttary on Washington, Washinggtton, D.C. D.C.’s HIV V--inffeected d population. population.

HIV-infected But it was waass in 2011 that Vargas Vaarrggas made his biggest splash, plash, when he wrote wrote the sp “c omingg out” ou ut” essay essaay for fo or Ne wY oork Times Times i “coming New York Magazine about ab bout his undocumented undocumented st atus. In thee piec ce—which won the status. piece—which Sidne ey Award Awaarrd ffor or so o cially cconscious onscious Sidney socially journalism— —Var a gas admit ttted to and journalism—Vargas admitted ap ologized for fo or using fforged orged do o cuments apologized documents plo oyment. y to gain emp employment.

V ar a gas sa ayys that he ffeared eeared Vargas says Immigration n and Customs Enf for o cement Enforcement (ICE) would d ccome ome for fo or him, but his admission had h the opp osite eff ffeect. opposite effect.

A yyear eear after the essa ay w aas p published,, essay was Pr esident Ob bama announc ed that President Obama announced alt the dep ortaation of he would ha halt deportation yyoung oung undo o ocumented rresidents esidents who undocumented met certain certain rrequirements. equirrements e . According Accor o ding to Da avenp e or o t, Def feerred A cction ffor o or Davenport, Deferred Action Childho od Arrivals A (D DACA) w aas Childhood (DACA) was designed as a “stop -gap measur re” to “stop-gap measure” pr ovvide temporary mporary rrelief elief e while C ongress tem provide Congress work ked e on immigration i reffo orm. worked reform.

Sinc aarrgas first disc oveered his Sincee V Vargas discovered immigration g n st atus in 19 977, C aliffo ornia status 1997, California passed its ow wn vversion eersion of the DREAM own A ct, which allows a undocumented Act, undocumented yyouth outh to access o access financial aid and in-state in-state tuition for fo or higher h educcaation. And with education. the Supr me C ourt’s o ver e turning of the em Supreme Court’s overturning Def feense of Marriage M A cct, V aargas finally Defense Act, Vargas has a p otenttial path to citizenship; he is potential to o old to qu ualiffy ffor o or D ACA. too qualify DACA. But true immigration rreform effo orm rremains emains elusive. eederal DREAM elussivve. The ffederal A ct is still no othingg mor pr op posal Act nothing moree than a p proposal sinc oduction in 20 01. U n nder the sincee its intr introduction 2001.

Under Obama adm ministration, dep ortations administration, deportations ha ave risen to o the “highest le eveels in the have levels ccountry’s ountry’s history, hisstory, y”” sa ayys Gabriella V illar i eal, says Villareal, p olicy manager manaager of the California Califfo ornia policy Immigration nP olicy C enter.

Policy Center.

V ar a gas says saayys his ne ew do cumentary is Vargas new documentary ““trying trying to mak m ke the cultural argument” argument” make ffor or immigra o ation rreform. effo orm. ““Any An A ny ne w immigration new immigrant will w tell yyou ou that the first o arn ab out Americ ca is thr ough g thingg we lea learn about America through films and mo m ovvies,” he sa ays y . “I alw wayys movies, says. always b elieeveed that thaat cultur ayys a ccentral entral rrole ole believed culturee pla plays in how we relate relate to each other and how we see each other r. other. poliitics of the immigration “The politics issue are are so toxic t and par tisan, that we partisan, rreally eally need cultur cculturee to step up so we ccan aan rreframe eframe the cconversation. on nversation. e ”

9 MARCH M A R C H 5-11, 5-11, 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com ossiliconvalley.com | sanjose.com m | metr metroactive.com oactive.com

been undocumented been undocumented students stu udents in the school district. She and other o school school school officials rallied behind behind Vargas, Var a gas, offering off ffeering help in whatever whatever e ways ways y they th heey could. could.

Hyland bought bought Vargas Vaarrga gas his first laptop and suit; his grandparents grandparentts couldn’t couldn n’’t afford aff ffo ord either.. Choir teacher Jill Denny either Jiill Denn D ny changed the lo location school’s cation of the scho o s annual trip ol’ Hawaii Vargas attend. to Ha awaaii so V aarrgas g ccould d at ttend. t Rich ould F ischerr, the school school sup eriintendent Fischer, superintendent who b eccame a another clo ose mentor to became close V aargas, took took him to see an a la aw wyyeer and Vargas, lawyer help ped him secur ngg ffor or ccollege— o ollege g— helped securee fundin funding undo cumented immigrants immigraants wer re not undocumented were eligible ffor or financial aid at o a the time time..

“The ey didn’t didn n’t ’ ask for fo or piec e of pap es er to “They pieces paper pr rove that I’m an Americ can or a human prove American b eing,” V aargas says. saayys. “They “Theey sa aw me as one being, Vargas saw of their own kids kids..” ey ccouldn’t ouldn n’’t do ffor or o But the one thing the they V aargas was waas get him full le egal st atus.

Vargas legal status.

“F or someone like lik ke V aarrgas, there there “For Vargas, ar re very veery limited options ayys Allison are options,,” sa says Da avenp e port, who runs thee international Davenport, human rights clinic at U.C. U.C . . Berkeley.

Berk kele e ey.

The 19 90s and early 20 00s sa aw a 1990s 2000s saw dramatic rise in immigra ation, she immigration, eexplains, xxplains, and with it, an in ncrreased e le eveel increased level of enf for o cement. ““As As we se ecured the enforcement. secured b orders, migration b ecam me less fluid and borders, became migrants remained remained in thee [US] because because the ey couldn’t couldn n’t ’ rreturn eturn as easily eaasily as the ey once once they they had,” she sa ays y .T odaay ther re is no clear says.

Today there path for fo or 11.5 million undo ocumented undocumented immigrants g ttaain legal lega gal st atus. to at attain status.

“Ther e’s a myth myth y that people people need “There’s to pla ay b avenp e ort sa ayys, play byy the rules rules,,” Da Davenport says, “but there there simply aren’t aren n’’t an aany ny rules ffor or o undo cumented persons persons to pla ay b y.” undocumented play by.

Vaarrggas could could not get status staatus st Vargas thr rough o familyy. Even Evven e though through his family. his grandpar ents wer aturalized grandparents weree na naturalized citizens U.S . . immigration n la aw do es not citizens,, U.S. law does allow grandparents grandparrents e to petition petition e their grandchildr ren. e He also couldn’t couldn o n’’t gain grandchildren. citizenship p thr ough g adoption—Hyland adop ption—Hyland p y through tried— —sinc s e he was waas too too old. o And Vargas Vaargas tried—since ccouldn’t ouldn n’t ’ get st tatus a through througgh marriage, marriage, status unless he w aas going to liee ab out his was about se exxual orient ation. sexual orientation.

“P eople literally ask me, m , ‘Why me ‘Wh hy don’t don n’’t “People yyou ou get in back of the lin o ne?’” V aarrgas g line?’”

Vargas sa ayys. “But then I tell them, them m, ‘There’s ‘There’s no says. line Thatt’s wh hy we need immigration line..’ That’s why rreform—there efform—ther o re is no line line..

“The rreason eason I rreally eally b ecaame a ec became journalist was waas because beccaause I ffound ound out that o that as a journalist, yyou o ou get g ab yyline. … byline.

Being in the newspaper, newspaperr, ffor or o me aas a me,, w was w ay of eexisting. xxisting.” way Vaarrggas started sttar a ted his career car a eer e at the Vargas Mount tain a View View Voice Vooicce whil le a ccollege ollege Mountain while student at San Francisc co St tate a U nivversit n e ty.

Francisco State University.

He b ecame a “c op py b oyy” at the San became “copy boy” Francisc co Chr ronicle o and to ook internships Francisco Chronicle took

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An inside look at San S Jose politics

BY T THE HE NUMB NUMBERS ERS

LIGHT IT UP Fans of Fourth of July fireworks firework ks probably won’t care

who takes credit crredit when the night sky sparkles. spark kles.

Mayoral Mayo oral Fir Fireworks eworks The mayor’s maayorr’s race race is on, so of course ther course theree ar aree going to be be fireworks. fir eworks. But Bu ut the latest tiff in San JJose’s ose’s quadrennial quadren nnial contest contest actually involves in nvolves fireworks. fireworks w .

Last L ast week, county county supervisor supervisor and aspiring mayor maayor Dave Daave Cortese Cortese applauded his hiis ccolleagues olleagues for fo or approving appr oving hiss motion to shell out $70,000 $70,000 of county county money money to rresurrect esurrect the 4th of July July celebration celebration in downtown n San Jose.

Jose. City City budget cuts nixed fireworks firreworks from from the main eevent vent six years yearrs ago. ago. Cortese Cortese noted that some $20,000 $2 20,000 of the county’s county’s moneyy would mone d pay paay for fo or a campaign campaign to tell the publi public ic they’re they’re doing it wrong wrong and promote promotee safety. saffeety.

But the announcement an nnouncement trump trumpeting eting Cortese’s Cortese’s win paints an

in incomplete ncomplete pictur picture, e, ac according cording to C Carl arl Salas Salas,, pr president esident of the R Rotary ot o arry C Club of San JJose. ose.

Appar Apparently ently the R Rotary ot o ary Club pl played laayed an imp important ortant par partt in tr trying yin ng to o rrevive evive the onc once-annual e-annual holida holiday ay di display isplaay and br brought ought up the idea to t C Cortese’s ortese’s opp opponent onent in the ma mayor’s ayorr’s ra race, ace, San JJose ose C Councilman ouncilman Sam L Liccardo, iccardo, and C County ounty Sup Supervisor ervisor C Cindy Cha Chavez. avez. In fact, the mone moneyy fr from rom the ccounty ounty ccovers overs only a fr fraction raction of the ccost ost ffor or a fir o fireworks ework ks sh show, how, with the rrest est eexpected xpected to ccome o ome fr from om the cit cityy and ccorporate orporate sp sponsors, ponsors, ccontrarian ontrarian R Rotarians o otarians ar argue. rgue.

“In the end, I don don’t ’t ccare are who takes takes th the he cr credit, edit, as long as we get our fi fireworks reworks back,”” Salas said.

—J Jennifer eenniffeer W Wadsworth aadsworth

Police P olice li e Union U i Gets G t Poetic Poetic ti

Jim Unland

Shakesp peare Bill Shakespeare

It’s It t’s ccome ome to this: L Labor abor blasting cit city ty of San JJose ose offici o officials ials via p poetry. oetry. Bad p poetry. oetrry. Lik Like ke rreally, eallyy, rreally eally e aawful wful p w poetry. oetry. The T missive missiv ve at hand is a 12-line 1 p poem oem writ written ttten in ccouplets ouplets b byy JJim im U Unland, nland, n pr president esiden nt of the P Police olice O Officers fficers A Association sssociation n (POA).

(PO A). ) Unland U nland has now sslammed n lammed eevery veery public saf safety feetty plan brandished b byy ma mayoral ayo orral ccandidates aandidates who supp supported orted Measure Meaasure B pension pension reforms, reefforms o , which w he blames for fo or eviscerating eviscerating San Saan Jose’s Jose’s police police force. fo orce.

Councilmembers/mayoral Councilmembers//maayo oral candidates candidates a Sam Liccardo Liccaarrd do and Madison Nguyen Nguyyen e both both offered off ffeered proposals proposals to stave stave off o the exodus exxodus of police policce academy academ my grads. grads. Later, Laterr, they theey each came caam me up with more more publicc safety saffeetty proposals, proposals, including addingg back the burglary burrgglary unit un nit and hiring more more officers. officers. But Councilman/candidate Councilman n//candidaate Pierluigi Oliverio’s Olivverio e ’s idea to allocate allocate a a bigger slice slice of the city’s citty’ y s general fund budget to the San Jose Jose Police Police Department Department inspired in nspired Unland Un nland to wax waax poetic. poetic.

FFACEBOOK: ACEBOOK: SanJoseInside

220% 0%

It’s been two decades since It’s sin nce water officials have asked the public to cut back this much But on water consumption.. B ut with rreservoirs eservoirs at third just a thir d of capacity and an nd rain rain a a rrarity arity a aside from weeks, Clara Valley Water District fr om the last couple wee ks, the Santa Clar ks, ra V aalley W ater a Distr rict is asking rresidents esidents to dial down water use by 20 percent. peercent.. If that seems like a tall order, orderr, suck s it up and rremember emember that drought Claraa V Valley Water (SCVWD) this is the worst dr ought in 40 years.. Santa Clar alley W aaterr District (SCV WD) spokesman instead Marty Grimes suggests no-cost no-cost fixes like using a broom broom instea ad of a hose to clean sidewalks and watering the lawn before beefore 5am before beffo ore the sun soaks up all all the moisture. moisture.. If money’s no subsidized option,, install low-flow faucets faucets a and toilets, which can be subs sidized with district rebates. rebates.. Pat Pat Ferraro, wonk ex-director has moree pointers:: catch Fer raro,, a water policy wo onk and ex-dir ector of the SCVWD, SCVWD,, ha as a ffew eew mor garden, free from cold shower water to rre-use e-u use in the gar den,, get a fr ee ffaucet aucet a aaerator aer ator fr om the water district scraps aps in a compost and put ffood o ood scr c bin instead of the garbage disposal. d

SSJI JI Launch Launches es New W Website ebsitee

READERS: DEAR READERS: After months of work work, rk, San JJose ose Inside’s Inside ’s website has rreceived eecceiv e veed a subst substantial antial fac facelift. elift. Our hop hopee is the new ne w la layout ayo out and ccommenting omme o enting ssystem yystem will create create b better etttter functio functionality onalitty and allow yyou ou to shar o share re and ccomment omment moree easily on the stories mor storiies yyou ou ccare o are about ab out most.

San JJose ose Inside is ccoming om ming off its most successful successful stretch stretch in i its nine-year nine-yeear history. histor y. Last Last yyear, eear, traffic incr increased eased byy 45 percent b percent ffor or more o more than 1.3 million page views views tot total. taall. The District Attorney’s A tttorneey’ y s offic officee and Fa Fair air Political Politiccal a Practices Practic cees C Commission ommission ha h have ave also launched se several everal e in investigations nvesti e igations as a rresult esult of our work.

Wee will continue W continue to deliver d veer the deliv

highest quality quaalitty behind-the-scenes behind-the-scenes off lo local politics, encourage ccoverage overage e cal p olitics, and enc ourage yyou ou to send o d yyour our tips to The Fly or o our rreporters. ep e orteers. And to rread ead some of the don’t always make stories that don ’t alw ways y mak ke it on to website, like Facebook the website e, lik ke us on Fac ebook and Twitter. ffollow ollow us on o nT witttter. w Thanks ffor oor rreading! eading!

Jose San J oose Inside

“Dear Mayor and Cit City ty Council, Council, o ” he wrote under the PO wrote POA A le letterhead. ettterhead. t “I will bbee blunt, It Item teem 3.6 is a disastrous disaasttroous political political stunt.”

OK. SIMPLE RHYME RHYMESS T TO O BE BEGIN. GIN. SURPRISINGLY SURPRISINGL LY POLITE. “The main pr proponent rop o onent must m bbee delirious delirious, s, if he bbelieves elieves e this pr proposal rop o osal should bbee ttaken aakken e serious..” serious -RE MIGHT W WANT ANT T A TO O RE RE-READ REEAD THA THAT AT P PART ART ABOUT BEING “T “TAKEN TAKEN A SERIOUS.” SE ERIOUS.”” “No mor more re grandst grandstanding taandin ng and no mor more re ttricks, rrickss, mor more re saf safety feetty in San J Jose ose o is a Measur Measure re B fix.”

AGREED. A GREED. GRANDS GRANDSTANDING TA AND DING JUS JUST T LLOOKS OOKS FFOOLISH. OOLISH. “So st stop toop this bbanter, antter er, thiss ffarce, aarrce, this

charadee, clearly charade, cleaarly this idea do does es not mak make ke the grade. grade e.”

THIS POE POEM’S M’S GRADE LOOKS LOOKS LIKE A FFOREGONE OREGONE CCONCLUSION, ONCLUSION, BUT THERE’S MORE. “14,000 words, woorrds ds, bringing bback ack PD units cut, and bud budget dget set set-asides t--asides ar are re all in the mix, but it’s it’s Meas Measure surre B that’s that’s the culprit and in need of a fix fix. x.”

APPARENTLY, APP PAREN A NTLLY, THA THAT’S AT T’S A BURN ON LICCARDO, LIC CARDO, WHO’S W KNO KNOWN WN FFOR OR LENG LENGTHY THY MEMOS WH WHEN HEN A FEW FEW PITHY VERSES VERSES CCOULD OULD SUFF SUFFICE. FICE. “Vote “V Vootte no on It Item teem 3.6 as w wee tir tire re of the latest lat test e public saf safety fet ety game game, e, when w wee all know that it’s it’s Mea Measure asurre B that is really really e to to blame blame. e.”

EAT EA AT YOUR YOUR R HEAR HEART T OUT OUT,, SHAKE SHAKESPEARE. SPEARE. — Jennifer Jennif e feer Wadsworth Wads a worth

Santa Sant ta Clara County

8 am - 9 am

8 am - 9 am

Intro to Women in Law Enforcement

Intro to Women in the Fire Service

9 am - 12 pm

9 am - 12 pm

Explore what it’s like to be in Law Enforcement at our workshops and physical agility practice.

hands on workshops.

• • • • • •

Panel Discussion with Q/A Background Process Physical Agility Practice 6’ Wall Demonstration 165 lb. Dummy Drag 99 yd. Foot Pursuit Obstacle Course

Presentation by Capt. Deborah Stocksick

• • •

structure Feel the weight of the “Jaws of Life” and other life saving equipment Climb a 75 foot ladder on one of our Ladder Trucks

• Santa Clara County Justice Training Center 19050 Malaguerra Ave. Morgan Hill, CA. 95037 Phone: 408-201-7630

Mc Cormack Training Center Sunnyoaks Station 485 West Sunnyoaks Ave. Campbell, CA 95008 Phone: 408-378-4010

March 15th 2014 8:00 8: 00 am to 12:00 12:00 pm Please pre-register for the L Law aw Enforcement Enforcement Event at e-mail us at WL WLES@sheriff.sccgov.org ES@sheriff.sccgov.org o

Please pre-register for the Fire F Service Event at info@sccfd.org info@sccfd.org o or call 408-378408-378-4010 -4010

scientology s ci e n t o l o g y know k no w y yourself. ourself. know know w life. life.

DISCOVER PRACTIC PRACTICAL CAL SOL SOLUTIONS UTIONS TO H HELP ELP YOU: Achieve

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Visit V i s i t tthe he C Church h u rc h of S Scientology c ie ntolog y S Stevens te ven s C Creek r e e k of o S San an J Jose ose

COME C OME IN TODAY TODAY ALL ALL ARE W WELCOME ELCO ME TOUR OUR PUBLIC PUBLIC INFORMATION IN NFOR RMATION CENTER

11865 865 L Lundy u nd y A Ave., ve., San San Jose Jose ((408) 408) 383-9400 383- 9400 Open 9 :30 a.m. a.m. tto o 110:00 0:00 p .m. M on–Fri Open 9:30 p.m.

Mon–Fri & 9:30 a.m. p.m. a.m. to 6:00 6 p.m. Sat–Sun Sat–Sun © 22012 012 CSI. C SI. All A l l Rights R ig ht s Reserved.

Reser ved . SScientology cientolog y iiss a ttrademark radema rk aand nd sservice e r v ic e m mark a rk o owned w ne d b byy R Religious e l i g iou s T Technology ech nolog y C Center enter aand nd iiss u used sed w with it h its it s p permission. erm ission.

w w w. s c i e n t o l o g y - s a n j o s e.o r g

MARCH M A R C H 5-11, 5-11, 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com o osiliconvalley .com | sanjose.co sanjose.com om | metr metroactive.com oactive.com

Joint Public Public Safety Women’s Women n’s Career Day y Sy ymposium Symposium

11

12

TTECHNOLOGY ECHNOLOGY & CULTURE CU ULLT URE IN SILICON V VALLEY ALLEY

metroactive.com metr oactive.com | ssanjose.com anjose.com | metr metrosiliconvalley.com osiliconvalleey.com | M MARCH A R C H 55-11, 11, 2014

updated daily: www www.sv411.com w .sv411.com

You’ve Got You’ve G Blackmail Blackma ail Meetup.com, the New York-based York-based o social networking site for for organizing organizing millions of hobbyist, ad-hoc ad d-hoc and wo professional pr ofessional groups groups worldwide, orldwide,, has been hit by what it describes desscribes as a service denial of ser vice (DoS) attack that by Sunday afternoon had already already lasted ffor or several several days with no n clear fix.

The outage began on a small scale on Feb.. 28 and has persisted persisted in various proportions pr oportions since then. then n.

The company says user useer data and credit cr edit card card information information n remains remains intact, but the network itself— itself—including —including the website and apps—has apps— —has been overwhelmed over whelmed by what it terms a ““distributed distributed denial of service s vice attack.” ser

Mission Chamber Orchestra of San Jose invites you to the 2nd Annual

Scott Meetup CEO and co-founder co-founder o Heiferman Heif erman published a blog post indicating that the DDoS DDo oS attack was in ffact act an extortion attempt, attem mpt,, apparently apparently by a hacker who claimed claimed that a competitor was paying g him or her to initiate the attack and demanding g $300 to stop it.. Heiferman Heiferm man received received Thursday. the threat threat via email on n Thursday y.

“Simultaneously, “Simul taneouslyy, the attack attack began, servers weree overwhelmed with our ser vers wer overwhelmed w traffic, tr affic, and our services services went down,” Heiferman Heif erman wrote. wrote.

A pairing social & silent auction featuring great music, fine wines, hors d’oeuvres, poetry pairings and decadent desserts!

Friday, March 7, 2014, at 7PM Beshoff Motorcars’ Gallery 3000 E. Capitol Expy., San Jose Tickets $45 at www.missionchamber.org Silicon Valley Arts Coalition Community in Arts

www.japantownsanjose.org & www.jtown.org

several He said sever al subsequent subseq quent attacks took place over the next neext few few days.

Meetup’s internal IT team teeam worked aggressively aggr essively to stop the th he attacks, but rrefused efused to yield to thee attacker’s attacker ’ss Heiferman demand.. In his blog post, po ost, Heif erman said that the companyy would not criminals. negotiate with crimina als.. He noted that the “ridiculously “ridiculously small”” dollar amount of the ransom, ransom m, along with the sophisticated nature natu ure of the attack, suggested thatt the criminals weree testing the company wer comp pany to find out

if they wou would uld be willing to pay and would likely likelly have demanded more more if Meetup had paid the initial $300.

Additionally, Heiferman Additional lyy, Heif erman asserted that payment payment would make the company—as company— —as well as others like it—a continued conttinued target targ get ffor or extortion.

He said that thaat Meetup is confident it aggressive can rrepel epel “this “ aggressive attack, even if it will w take time.”

—Dan Holden

CCable ablee P Package ackage Comcast-Warner is now officially a Comcast-Warner thing.. Hold d onto your cable bills.

The steal th h deal with Time Time Warner Warner stealth shortly comes sho ortly after reports reports had originally surfaced s aced that Comcast was surf in talks with witth Charter to buy up certain areas ar eas of coverage co overage on the latter’s latter’s map, weree eyeing W Warner while both wer arner as the target eventual ta arget for for a takeover. takeover.

Comcast’s With Comc cast’s roster roster of around around 22 million subscribers, sub bscribers, and Time Time Warner’s Warner’s on top of that, 11 million customers c this deal iss set to substantially increase Comcast’s incr ease Co omcast’s market share share and how broadband influence h broadband Internet is sold to customers. cusstomers. thiss is more “I think thi more of a story about two companies compaanies wanting to get together to o improve improve their market sharee and revenues shar revenues ffor or their stock price than it is for for customers,”” said tech industry industry analyst Jeff Kagan.

Kagan.

“I don’t think thiink this is a story about att all.” customers t ll ” Ass it stand stands, Time A ds, both Comcast and T ime Warner W arner have haave months of litigation and negotiation negotiation and regulatory regulatory of them before meetings ahead a before anyone buys bu uys anything, and many analysts suspect suspect the deal will only be approved approveed with a bevy of strict contingencies contingenc cies laid on top of the framework fr ameworkk to finalize the deal.

Comcastt has C h publicly bli l stated t t d they th don’t expect expeect to have anything written in stone before before the end of from this year, year, and a customers fr om either expect to see a company shouldn’t s change in their monthly statements before then. bef ore the en.

—Chris Stobing Stobing

11

Hurry! Time Hurry!

Time iiss unning ou t! running out! $WSDMCDCĂ„GNTQRĂ„ENQĂ„Ă—M@KĂ„ WSDMCDC GNTQR ENQ Ă—M@K eekend. Mo re iinfo nfo b elow. weekend.

More below.

Star ta ta arr Wars War Wa ars rsÂŽ Fan Fan D Days ays

Presented by

March M arch 2 21, 1, 2 22, 2, and and 23 23 From om 1 10:00 0:00 a a.m. .m. tto o8 8:00 :00 p p.m. .m. • PPut ut on on your your ffavorite avorite SStar tarr Wars Wa arrs

costume. co stume. •T Take ake a photo photo w with ith SStormtroopers, tormtroopers, and nd ot other her Star Starr Wars Wa arrs Droids DroidsTM a characters. characters.

Come ome ssee ee th the eg galaxy’s alaxy’s best est bounty bounty hunter! hunter!

New Character!

Boba oba FFett’s ett’s a arrival rrival a att T The he B@E J>OHP QEB iOPQ QFJB�

1B@EĂ?J>OHPĂ?QEBĂ?iOPQĂ?QFJBĂ? e renowned renowned b ounty hunter hunter the bounty as ap pea ared iin n th e 20-venue 20-venue has appeared the urney o his exhibition. exhibition. journey off tthis

Boba Fett

Downtown Do wntown Sa San n JJose ose

Leading Local Sponsor

AS ASIAN SIAN ART MUSEUM MUS SEUM H OUGH MAY HR MA AY 25 25 THROUGH www.asianart.org/yoga www.asianart.org /yoga A tofY Ar Yo oga #ArtofYoga

Media Sponsor

Tickets T ickets at at thetech.org thetech.org 2+ z *SA ?QĂ?JK *RB JJ PGEFR Q PCQCP TCB 3QCB SLBCP ?SRFMPGX?RGML 2+ GQ ? RP?BCK?PI MD 2FC 2CAF +SQCSK MD 'LLMT?RGML Ă??JJ PGEFR Q PCQCP TCB ~ GQ ? PCEGQRCPCB RP?BCK?PI MD 2FC 2CAF +SQCSK MD 2+Ă? Ă?zĂ? Ă?*SA?QĂ?JKĂ?*RB Ă? JJĂ?PGEFRQĂ?PCQCPTCB Ă?Ă?3QCBĂ?SLBCPĂ??SRFMPGX?RGML Ă?Ă?2+Ă?GQĂ??Ă?RP?BCK?PIĂ?MDĂ?2FCĂ?2CAFĂ?+SQCSKĂ?MDĂ?'LLMT?RGML Ă??JJĂ?PGEFRQĂ?PCQCPTCB Ă?~Ă?GQĂ??Ă?PCEGQRCPCBĂ?RP?BCK?PIĂ?MDĂ?2FCĂ?2CAFĂ?+SQCSKĂ?MDĂ? ''LLMT?RGML Ă??JJĂ?PGEFRQĂ?PCQCPTCB Ă?Ă? Ă?2GAICRQĂ?'LAJSBCĂ??BKGQQGMLĂ?RMĂ?CVFG@GRGMLĂ??LBĂ?KSQCSK Ă?Ă?2FCĂ?+GJJCLLGSKĂ?$?JAMLĂ?#VNCPGCLACĂ?CVRP?

LLMT?RGML Ă??JJĂ?PGEFR QĂ?PCQCP TCB Ă?Ă? Ă?2GAICR QĂ?'LAJSBCĂ??BKGQQGMLĂ?RMĂ?CVFG@GRGMLĂ??LBĂ?KSQCSK Ă?Ă?2FCĂ?+GJJCLLGSKĂ?$?JAMLĂ?# V NCPGCLACĂ?CV RP?

Yoga: ga a: T The h he Ar Artt of T Transformation ransformation is the the w world’s orld’s first st major ar artt e exhibition xhibition about yyoga. oga a. It explores explores yoga’s ga a’s fascinating histor historyy and its tr transformation a ansformation into o a g global lobal phenomenon. Hig Highlights hlig ghts include masterpieces astterpieces of Indian sculptur sculpture e and a painting; pages ge es fr from om tthe he first illustr illustrated ated bo book ook of yyoga oga postures; stures; and a T Thomas homas Edison film, ffilm Hindoo Fakir kirr ((1902), 1902), tthe he first American mo movie vie e ever ver produced od duced about India.

See ee it for $10 $10 on Thursday Thursda ay nights nightts from from 5–9 5–9 PM. M. Or Or,, see it for just $5 on T Target a et F arg First irst Free ree e Sundays Sunday ys (Apr 6 and Ma Mayy 4 4). ) ).

ASIAN ART MUSEUM Chong-Moon Lee Lee C enter Center for A sian Art Art & Cultur e Asian Culture 2 00 Lar kin Street Street 200 Larkin San Francisco, Francisco, CA 94 102 94102 4 15.581.3500 415.581.3500 w ww.asianart.org www.asianart.org

Yoga: Y oga: T o The h he Ar Artt of T Transformation ransformation w was as or organized ganized by tthe he Ar Arthur thur M. Sackler G Gallery, allery, Smithsonian S mithssonian Institution wit with h suppor supportt fr from om tthe he F Friends riends of tthe h F he Freer reer and Sackler Galleries, G alleriies, tthe he Ar Artt Mentor F Foundation oundation Lucerne and tthe he Ebr Ebrahimi ahim mi F Family amily F Foundation. oundation.

Presentation P resen ntation at tthe he Asian Asian Art Art Museum is made possible wit with h tthe he gener generous ous suppor supportt of The T he B Bernard ernard Osher F Foundation, oundation, Helen and Rajnikant Desai, E. E Rhodes and L Leona eona B. Carpenter Carrpenter F Foundation, oundation, Kumar Kumar and Vijaya Vija aya Malavalli, Malavalli, Society Socie ety for Asian Asian Art, Art, and Walter W alterr & Elise Haas F a Fund. und. Image: T The he chakr chakras as of tthe he subt subtle le body b (detail), page 4 from fr om a manuscript of tthe he S Siddha iddha S Siddhanta iddhanta Paddhati, Paddhati, 1824, 1824, byy Bulaki (Indian, activ active e early ear ly 1800s).

1800s). India; Rajasthan Rajasthan state, former kingdom of Marwar, Marwar, Jodhpur.

Jodhpur. Opaque watercolor w atercolor c and gold on paper paper.. C Courtesy ourtesy of the Mehr Mehrangarh angarh Mus Museum eum T Trust, rust r , RJS RJS 23 2376.

76.

Media a sponsors:

MARCH M A R C H 5-11, 5-11, 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com o osiliconvalley .com | sanjose.co sanjose.com om | metr metroactive.com oactive.com

Closes loses March March 23 23

metroactive.com metr oactive.com | sa sanjose.com anjose.com | metr metrosiliconvalley.com osiliconvalleey.com | M MARCH A R C H 55-11, 11, 2014

14

SILICON SILICON ALLEYS ALLEYS

Well Connected LOOK L OOK ALIVE A LI V E Jean Davis, Daviss, who created thiss piece, ‘Emergence 1,’ will join n fellow artists LAuruS Myth and a Avery Palmer March Palmer in a live l art contest. The three artists artists will paint live at Camera 112 2 cinemas during the M arch 7 South First Fridays and throughout the run of the Cin Cinequest nequest film festival.

South h First Fridays and Cinequestt build urban build creative urba an synergy BY B Y GAR GARY Y SINGH

W

IITH CINEQUEST CINEQUEST a already bringing of folks t thousands t downtown San to JJose ose for numerous nu umerous films, films, Maverick Award A ard hoedowns Aw and chic soirées, so oirées, it seems appropriate appropriat te that First Fridays will also erupt errupt on March 7.

That means means, s, for for o film buffs in need of downtime diversions diversions this Friday, Fridaay, moree than thaan enough art well,, mor art shows will unfold variety and hijinks wi ill unf fold o in a variet ty locales around neighborhood. of lo cales ar ou und the neighb orhood.

That is not an n invitation in nvit v ation to bail on Cinequest; rather, ratther, it is a rreminder eminder that will bee cconnected, eeverything verything wi ill b onnected,, as it be. should b e. If you yo ou steal aaway way into the

gu guts uts of downtown this Frida Friday, ay, yyou ou w experience will experience creative creativve urban ssynergy yneergy byy those actually making it happ happen, b en n, rather politicians just ra ather than the p oliticians who jus st about ttalk a ab alk out it.

But first things first. This cconcept oncep pt off “c “connecting” already the o onnecting”” is alr eady one of th he primary time p rimary Cinequest memes this tim me around, begin particular, ar round,, to b egin with. In par ticulaar, ccertain e tain Cinequest peeps er peeps at the n nightly meetups will be be dispatched d to officially o fficially “connect” “connect” attendees attttendees to other oth her attendees. at ttendees t . That is, is, they they will informally inffo orm mally introduce other,, in ntroduce guests to each other functioning social-wingwomanfu unctioning as so cial-wingwoman-icebreakers sorts, ic cebreakers of sor ts, ratcheting up tthe interaction, time.. If yyou're in nteraction,, big time ou're one off those alienated,, intr introverted o overted and d disconnected stands d disc onnected ttypes yp y es who just st andss there likee a sc scarecrow parties, th here lik arecrow at all the par rties, freely, well, u unable to ccommunicate ommunicate fr eelyy, wel ll, bee pleasantly str strongyyou o just might b ou onggarmed ar rmed into a conversation con nveersation with

somebody somebody interesting. interesting. Honestly, Honestlyy, I love lo ove this idea. It sounds like lik ke some vanguard vanguard Ph.D. Ph.D. think-tank think k--tank experiment experriment at the boundaries boundaries of cognitive cognitivve behavioral behaavvioral science, science, dynamic systems system ms theory theory and artificial artificial intelligence intelligence research. resear e ch. Leave Leaave it to Cinequest to fuse creativity creativitty and innovation.

Awesome. inno ovation. v Aw wesome.

Outside the parties, parties, as the moon moon rises in the sky, sk ky, art art shows show ws will unfold unffold o everywhere, everywhere, as they they usually usu ually do on First First Fridays.

Fridaayys. Over Over at WORKS/San WORK KS/San Jose, Jose, for fo or example, entirely different example, an entir ely di iff ffeerent ttype ype of connectionism connectionism will commence. com mmence. Trina Merry's Merry's bodypainting bodypainting emporium emporium will present opus of present yet yet e another magnum m human pastiches guaranteed guaraanteed to offend off ffeend the morality moralitty police police at Team Teeam San Jose, Jose, who just happen happen to be be WORKS' landlords. landlords.

“We fun “W We are are doing d i somee hilarious hil i f things for fo or First First Friday, Fridaay,” Merry Merry told me. me. “We “W We are are creating creating a giant Twister Twister w game that has paint on n the circles. circles.

And an anatomically anatomically correct correct lifeliffeboard people size Operation Operation b oard where w ep wher eople pull out the ‘bones’ ‘bones’’ and an nd place place them on a living model, model,, thuss helping us

paint them them. m. We We will have haave a special special performance bodypainted p erforman o nce with b odypainted models mo dels fforming orrming a human skull. o skull. And, I think,, wee are are offering off ffeering chocolate chocolate nipples—actually from nipples—a actually cast cast fr om some of models—to 100 people. our mo dells—to the first 10 0p eople.”

Merry's Merr be creating creating y's team will be bodypaint installations livee ffor b odypaint inst allations liv o or three three weekends, Friday week keends, Frida ay and Saturdays, Saturdaays y, March 7-22, Mar ch 7-22 2,, with each performance performanc o e different diff ffeerent from frrom the next. neexxt. So before beffo ore nighttime yyou ou ccatch atch a night tttime Cinequest flick opulent California Theatre in the opul lent C aliffornia o Theatre across livee acr oss the str sstreet, eet,, get primed with liv bodypainting b odypaintiing first. Now Now that's creative creative urban ssynergy. yneergy. San Jose Jose should itself rrebrand ebrand its self the “Bodypainting “Bodypainting Capital Silicon Valley.

C apital of Silic S on V aalley.” That would look lo ok a lot better betttter plastered plastered on all of our merely “Capital garbage cans can ns than mer ely “C apital of Silicon Valley.

Silic on V aallley.”

Friday, bodypainted This Frid daay, live livve b odypainted models models empty will also sett up shop in certain certain empt ty storefronts, stor t efr f onts t , thanks th k to t the th Phantom Ph t project, Galleries pr roject,, although that's not the end d of Phantom Galleries' ccollaboration ollaboration with Cinequest. The ttwo wo w will partner entities wil ll par tner via the ffestival's eestival's Live Artt C Contest bee held at the Liv ve Ar o ontest to b Camera12 throughout oughout the C amera12 Cinemas C thr Vamping ffestival. eestival. V am amping on the “connect” “connect” meme,, thr three artists—Jean Davis, meme e ar ee tists— —Jean Da avis v , LAuruS Myth LA Au uruS My yth and Avery Aveery Palmer— Palmerr— will paint llive ivve during the festival. festival. e Cinequesters Ci Cinequeste ers will ill be be able bl to vote vo ote for fo or favorite three. their fa avo oriite of the thr ee.

Gallery, Seeing Things T Gallery, Anno Fire Domini,, Higher H Fire Clayspace Claayyspace and Gallery, Galler y, as well as Kaleid Gallery, Gallery, have opening Friday will each ha h ave shows op ening Frida ay night. Plus, Pluss, the multitude of other galleries,, institutions, galleries in nstitutions, coffee coff ffeee shops, shops, rrestaurants, estaurantss, yoga yoga studios and sliding door stores do or stor ess will highlight their own shows ongoing sh hows or events, eveents, all of which aree a ffew ar ew blocks b cks from blo from the nexus nexus of the Cinequest festival. festival. e There's Ther e's even even a DJ competition. competition.

Att South F First Billiards, A irst Billiar ds, Cinequest present will pr esen nt three—DJ three—DJ That Girl,, DJ Butter Shea But ttteer and The CME—who will chancee to p perform ccompete ompete ffor o or the chanc erform o at the gala closing clo osing night spectacular. spectacular. this All of th his is designed to make make effortless cconnecting onnectingg eff ffo ortless and natural. I ffeel eel e already. cconnected onnected alr eadyy.

MARCH

7

77-11pm -11pm

SOUT H FIRST SOUTH FRID AYS FRIDAYS Various V arious venues in downtown San Jose • southfirstfridays.com

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BITES

RIO GRANDE Yam Leaf Bistro serves many Salvadoran-inspired dishes such as the enchilada del rio, but is looking to expand its menu to more global influences.

Leafing Out

A

S A PRACTICING Buddhist, Christine Liu wanted to share the benefits of a vegetarian diet in hopes others would catch on. Serving lunch and dinner, her organic vegetarian restaurant, Yam Leaf Bistro in Mountain View, has a Latin flair, serving pupusas, yucca, and other traditional dishes made with soy chorizo and tempeh standing in for meat. However, with time Liu said she would like the menu to expand to include more global influences. Yam Leaf Bistro also serves organic wines and hard-to-find gluten-free beers

Traditional T rraditional Spanish Cuisine Cuisin ne

Lunch Specials SELECTED SALADS & TAPAS

11am-3pm Daily FINE DINING CATERING C ATERING T ONLINE ORDERS

Happy Hour 3-5pm Daily 18818 1 8818 C Cox ox A Ave., ve., S Saratoga aratoga

(408) 37 379-1677 9 -1677 tapaolerestaurant.com m

Open O pen 111am 1am to to 10pm 10 pm Daily Daily

METRO: WHAT IS THE STORY BEHIND YAM LEAF BISTRO?LIU: It was a group of six of us; all practicing Buddhists, and we really wanted to promote a vegetarian diet to the public. We feel killing animals is not really good for humans and it’s not good for the earth. [Being a vegetarian is] the easiest way to alter the world. The intention is we’re not here to make money.

THE MENU IS OBVIOUSLY VEGETARIAN BUT IS THERE A PARTICULAR CUISINE YOU BUILD FROM? The original restaurant was Salvadoran and a fair amount of the recipes are left over from the previous owner such as pupusas and yucca plates. We’re going to have some new global menu items, maybe curried rice, maybe something Greek. We are trying to get vegetarian dishes from all over the world; there are no real boundaries.

HAVE YOU BEEN A VEGETARIAN FOR A LONG TIME? I was converted about 9 years ago. I was a meat eater: I loved bacon and all the other goodies. For me it was just an overnight thing—everyone is different. For me I changed dramatically and I feel I can think more clearly, I feel really good and I feel I benefit from being a vegetarian.

ARE A MAJORITY OF YOUR CUSTOMERS BUDDHISTS AS WELL, OR THOSE WHO FOLLOW A STRICT VEGETARIAN DIET? Our target customer is actually a meat eater. I want people to come and be like, “Oh being a vegetarian is not too bad.” I had a non-vegetarian customer the other day tell me, “It’s beyond not too bad, it’s delicious!” and that was great encouragement. I would like to have more meat eaters come and try something different.

—Jeff Cianci YAM LEAD BISTRO 699 Calderon Ave., Mountain View. 650.940.9533 or yamleafbistro.com.

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Great G reat Food Food | S Specialty pecialty C Coee oee | C Craft raft B Beer eer Fast WiFi Local Art Music F ast & Free Free Wi Fi | L ocal A rt & M usic Happy Happy Hour Hour Everyday Everyday

Upcoming U pcoming E Entertainment nter tainment

Events E vents are are for for all all ages ages WED 3/5 | 9pm | W Wax aax W Wednesday: eednesday: Vinyl DJJ N Night ight featur featuring ing Lisabi & A Avery veerry Burke Burke of Corpus C Callosum allosum (E (Eclectic) Ecclectic) Ryan Meagher Trio Brian Hoo & THU 3/6 | 8:30pm | R yyan M eagher T rio with hB rian H Sylvia S ylvia Cuenca Cuenca ((Jazz) Jazz) a Disco Doom, Noo M Maps, Momotaro (Indie) FRI 3/7 7 | 9pm | D issco D oom, N aps, M om motaro (I In ndie) SAT Black Brown Anniversay Party SA T 3/8 | 9pm | B l lack &B rown Anniv versay e P arty (I (Indie/Dance) In ndie/Dance) SUN 3/9 | 7pm-11p 7pm-11pm 1pm | The E Eulipions ulipions JJazz azz JJam a S am Session ession ((Jazz) Jaazz) Wax Wednesday: Night (Eclectic) WED 3/12 | 9pm | W aax W ednesday: e Vinyl DJ D N ight (E Eclectic) c Pete Fallico’s Hammond THU 3/13 | 8:30pm m|P ete F allico’s H ammon nd B3 Thursday: Quartet JJaques aques Lesure Lesurre Q uartet u Cado Caliocas FRI 3/14| 8:30pm | C ado & O C aliocas (B (Brazillian) razzillian) SAT SAT 3/15 | 9pm | Silent Silent Pictures, Pictures, Carsick Carsick Cars, Cars, a Flavor Flavvoor Crystals, Cryystals, White+ (I (Indie) In ndie) SUN 3/16 | 7pm-1 7pm-11pm 11pm | The E Eulipions ulipions JJazz azz JJam am S Session ession ((Jazz) Jaazz) Wax Wednesday: Battlehooch (Eclectic) WED 3/19 | 9pm | W aax W ednesday: e B attlehoooch (E Ecclectic)

374 S 374 South outh F First irst S Street treet Downtown D owntown S San an Jose Jose | SoFA SoFA District District

Across A cross tthe he sstreet treet from from the the California California Theater Theater | ((408) 408) 2 280-6161 80-6161 cafestritch.com c a f e s t ri t c h . c o m | Sun S un 4pm-11pm 4pm-11pm M Monon- T Tues ues C CLOSED LOSED | W Wed-Sat ed-Sat 4 4pm-2am pm-2am

1RZ 2SHQ

$PDWR V

$OPDGHQ 5G 6DQ -RVH

Hyatt Regency Santa Clara hosts:

6:30 pm Reception 7pm Dinner Begins

$85 PER PERSON

5-COURSE DINNER Paired with Darcie Kent Vineyard Wines & Creek Monkey Tap House Beers

INCLUDES TAX & GRATUITY

RESERVATIONS REQUIRED

408·510·6488

Each course will be paired with a 3oz pour of wine and a 3oz pour of beer from our featured wine and beer maker.

Hosted at

Special room rate available for Chef’s Table event guests at resweb.passkey.com/go/Beervswine

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SATURDAY MARCH 15

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SV DINING

FULL PLATE Moveable Feast’s third annual festival has expanded its offerings, including two stages of music—and lucha libre wrestling.

Taco Time

TACO FANS HAVE something to look forward to with the announcement this week that San Jose Taco Fest will return for its third year.

Moveable Feast, the food truck organizing company behind the event, is bringing the event back to History Park on May 24 with a few revisions based on lessons learned the two previous years to improve the experience.

This year, for the expected 6,000 taco lovers, there will be 35 trucks: 15 in the traditional taco vein, 15 with more of a taco fusion vibe and five dessert trucks. Since the event coincides with SJSU’s graduation, it will start later and end later to give all those new graduates their well-deserved taco rewards.

The entertainment is expanding, as well, with two stages and an as yet to be named local favorite rock band headlining. Since the Lucha Libre wrestlers were such crowd pleasers the last couple years, they’ll be returning along with vendors from SJ Made, a local craft and clothing makers’ collective.

“We’re making it better and better every year,” said Ryan Sebastian, owner of Movable Feast. “We’re excited to keep growing.”

Sebastian was hesitant to make the same claim about the Bacon Festival of America last year after a bit of a fiasco when event attendance well exceeded expectations and overwhelmed vendors. But, after bringing in a professional event planning company, Moveable Feast has since decided to go ahead with the Bacon Festival of America 2014 on Fourth of July weekend.

Also, for Labor Day weekend this year, Moveable Feast is planning a whole new festival: The Electronic Sriracha Festival. It will be a celebration of sriracha-smothered foods and EDM. We will share more details on both events as they arrive.—Stephen Layton

Hey, Cowboy

COWBOY CUISINE IS hardly synonymous with a fine cuisine, but the range watched over by the “gauchos” (a.k.a. cowboys) of Fogo de Chao is far more likely to be the kitchen sort. That said, the gaucho chefs of Brazilian steakhouse Fogo de Chao do their cooking over something that does bear some resemblance to a campfire: open flames for roasting skewered meats. Fogo de Chao opened its first Northern California location last week at Santana Row in San Jose. The steakhouse serves 16 different cuts of meat of which diners can eat their fill—as well as sides and salads.—Heather Zimmerman FOGO DE CHAO 377 Santana Row, Suite 1090, San Jose. 408.244.7001 or fogodechao.com

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MetroGiveaways Me troGi G veaways WIN FREEE SSTUFF! TUFF!

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metroactive m metr troacctive ttive

CHOICESS B CHOICE BY: Y: Aaron Carnes Amulya Datla Stephen Layton Layton

DISCO DOOM

EVO-ROCK

*wed wd

LISABI LIS ABI

Café S Café Stritch, tritch, Sa San an Jose Wed, Free W ed, 9pm, Fr eee Theree really Ther really isn’t isn’t ’ any musical down Brazilian anchor tying do wn Br azilian sextet minute they’ree blaring Lisabi. One minu ute they’r grooves, heavy jazz-punkk gr ooves, the next it’s it ’s tripped-out Pink Floyd meets Know And YYou ou Will Kn ow Us By The TTrail rail Of Dead noise. Song S to song— moment, moment to mom ment, rreally—the eally—the hopscotch from genree six-piece hopsc otch fr om genr genree in a wa way that’s to genr ay that ’ss genuinely fun, weird weird and doesn’t doesn d ’t rrequire equire a enjoy..

Ph.D. in music theory theory to enjoy They’ree rredefining They’r edefining what it means fusion-rock to be a fusion-r ock band, and process. having a blast inn the pr ocess. (AD)

JOFA JOF FA AND A FRIENDS Blank Club, San S Jose Wed, W ed, 8pm, Fr FFree ee Apparently Jofa Appar ently Jo ofa is friends with because himself becau use his “band” band” is called ““Jofa Jof J a and friends” frien nds” and he’s he’s a oneIndeed, man band. Ind deed, his bio lists him instrument: guitar,r, bass, under every in nstrument: guitar vocals. cranks drums, vocals s. He cr anks out some punk-rock garagefun punk-r ock tunes with gar agerrock ock and ’80ss skate punk influences, somewhat all with a som mewhat silly edge.. It’s It’s Berry like sped-up Chuck C Ber ry songs, or a light-hearted Black Flag. On the video around ffor or “I’m Not Sorry” Sorry”” he runs ar ound a grocery storee with his electric guitar guitar,r, gr ocery stor harassing unsuspecting patrons har assing uns suspecting patr ons shredding. it’s while shr edding.. But it ’s not all goofy. goofy y. His song sonng “McChildren” “McChildren” angrily upon expounds upo on how McDonald’s is children making childr ren ffat. at. Though, with from the rrepeated epeated clips of Chunk fr om the Gooniess inn the video, it it’s ’s not that either.r. (A (AC) serious either C)

*fri f

EEVO-ROCK VO--ROCK Evolution n Night Club, Sunnyvale Fri, 8pm, $10 Evolution Night Club is putting together a night of rrock ock en Español.

San Jose soul s favorites favorites Sweet Sweet HayaH headline, along with ADM, Ayahuasca a Ayyahuasca and Exilio. Sweet Sweet HayaH brings an interesting interestingg blend of soul/blues/ rock rock and a bit of hip-hop, while ADM is kind kinnd of a Spanish-language Depeche Mode M with those dark grooving lines. grooving synth s lines They even do a killer Spanish Spaanish cover of “Enjoy the Silence.”” Ayahuasca Ayahuasca tends more more towards towards straight sttraight up rock rock ‘n’ ‘n’ roll roll and Latin pop,, mostly covering ’80s and ’90s hits inn both English and Spanish.

As Exilio, that’ll As ffor or Exili io, well,, that ’ll have to be a surprise because beecause apparently apparently they’re they’re too cool even evven for for the Internet. (SL)

DISCO DIS SCO DOOM Café S Café Stritch, tritch, San Jose Fri, 8pm, 8p pm, Free Free

Numerraalss, the rrecently Numerals ecently rreleased eleased thir thirdd album by SSwiss wiss noise-pop noise pop duo Disco Doom,, is easily the most accessible rrecord ecord in the band’s decade-plus career car eer (and produced produced by Built Built To To Spill’s Roth).

Jim Ro th). While on prior rreleases eleases interest weree their in nterest in noise and pop wer mutually jarringly mutua lly exclusive (and jar ringly schizophrenic) schizop phrenic) they’ve managed to marry mar ry the t two sides of their musical coin, and annd they’ve given the whole thing a gentle edge.. Even the songs punchier aree soft, delicate, with pu unchier beats ar albeit dissonant pop tunes. The d singer’s aree lullaby-esque singer ’s melodies ar guitar’s while tthe he guitar ’s distorted ffeedback eedback has an almost soothing quality about grating it,, as opposed oppposed to the gr ating tension somee of their older slowcor slowcoree jams, of som drone which could c dr one on ffor or 30 minutes more.

(AC) or mor e.. (A C)

TH THE HE SOUNDTRACK SOUNDTRACK OFF CINEQUEST CINEQUEST Sou South uth First Billiar Billiards, ds, San Jose Fri,, 9:30pm, $5 (or Free Free with FFestival Fes stival ti l ticket) ti k t) Cinequest Cin equest is an exciting time in downtown Theree ar aree dow wntown San Jose. Ther movies, lectures, mo ovies, lectur es, parties, celebrities and, and d, of course, all those film people running around VIP run nning ar ound town with their V IP passes. year,r, they’r they’ree adding pas sses. This year something different som mething totally diff erent to the list:: a DJ competition. Thr Three list ee local DJ heavyweights will duke it out Billiards at SSouth First Billiar ds ffor or the title of B Best DJ Ever (not rreally, eally, but it should sho ould be a lot of fun rregardless). egardless). three DJs—The All thr ee participating DJs— The CME, CM E, DJ That Girl and DJ Shea Butter—are But tter—are well-known in the local electroo loca al hip-hop, soul and electr scene, sce ene, and spin a combo of obscure obs scure oldies and new cuttingedge edg ge tracks. tracks. (AC) (AC)

oncerts * cconcerts WITCHDREAM MANSION

THE TRIMS TRIMS/ANYA /ANY YA & THE GET DO DOWN WN March Ma rch 7 at the Blank Club

HABIB KHAN March Mar ch 8 at at Montalvo Arts Center

EMBLEM 3 March Mar ch 1122 at City National Civic

HAPA HAP A March Mar ch 21 aatt Montalvo Arts Center

THE B BANG ANG March Mar c 22 at the Blank Club ch

KINGSS OF LE KING LEON ON March M Mar ch 25 at SAP SAP Center

JENNIFER NETTLE NETTLESS March Mar ch 27 2 at City National Civic

JON N NAKAMA NAKAMATSU/JON ATSU/JON MANASSE MANASSE March Mar ch 27 aatt Montalvo Arts Center

PAULA P AULA CCOLE OLE March Mar ch 29 aatt Montalvo Arts Center

NUCLEAR CCOWBOYZ OWBOYZ March Mar c 29-30 ch 29-30 at SAP SAP Center

THE RE REVEREND VEREND HOR HORTON TON HEAT HEA AT March Mar c 29 at the Blank Club ch

ANTHONY BOURD A BOURDAIN AIN & ERIC RIPER RIPERT T A 13 at SSJJ Center for April for Performing P erforming Arts

*sat

MOTORPOOL MOTORPOOL SST. T. PATRICK’S PAT TRICK’SS DAY D AY BASH BASH Motorpool Automotive, Campbell Campbell a unwrapped Sat, 2pm, 1 unwr apped toyy or 5 canned items It may not be SSt.t.. Paddy’s Paddy’s day yet, y but Motorpool Automotive will wiill party it’s like it ’s March March 17 anyway. anywayy. The tunes start at 2pm and ffeature eature an eeclectic clectic array ar ray of local talent,, including SSweet weet HayaH, Forgotten HayaH, Forgotten Gods, Gods, Melted Melteed State, State, tate Gauge Promise, TTwelve welve w Promise,, O’Cravens O’Cravvens and AVTTE. unwrapped A VTTE. Admission is one unw wrapped (for canned toy (f or TToys oys o For TTots) ots) o or five ca anned (for Harvest Food items (f or Second Har vest Foo od Bank).

The Silicon Valley Vaalley Roller Girls hold h a from car wash fr om 10am till 2pm to t rraise aise funds for for their away games. Casp3r Casp3r bands. spins dance tunes between ba ands.. (AC) (AC)

MORRISSEY MORRIS SEY May 7 at City National Civic

NIKHIL DHIN DHINGRA NGRA Red Rock Coff Coffee, ee, Mountain Moun ntain View Sat, 8pm, Free Free “Yeah “Y Yeeah Okay,” Okayy,,”” the latest acoustic acou ustic Palo Alto ballad by P alo Al to singer-songwriter singer-s singer songwriter s Nikhil Dhingra, Dhingrra, a, tells of the trials t and overcoming tribulations of over coming a lost love.

Like Elliott Smith,, Dhingra Dhingrra says s a lot with just an acoustic guitarr and his breathy aren’t br eathy voice,, though his songs songs ar en’t as angry as Smith’s.

Smith’s.. For thee past been couple of years,, he has bee en writing and covering a whole slew of tunes, production, odduction,, but all in various stages of pr emotions. always rraw aaw in terms of em otions.. (AD)

WITCHDREAM WIT CHDREA AM MANSION

melodies together all by b his lonesome, he’ll but for for this upcoming show s he’ll seven-piece piece band. be backed by a sevenRaymond’s songs workk well in their simple one-man fform, orm,, but should be pparticularlyy excitingg to hear as the band builds harmoniess on guitars drums. and big splashy drums s. The easiest aree Bon Iver comparisons to rreach each ffor or ar Witchdream or Sufjan SStevens, tevens,, but Witchdr W eam does moree Mansion definitely doe es much mor either than simply echo eithe er of those indie heavyweights.. (SL)

*mo mon on

San P Pedro edrro Squar Squaree Marke Market, et,, San Jose Sat, 7:30pm, Free Free

MOTOWN ON MOTOWN MONDAYS MOND AYS

Witchdream live A Witchdr eam Mansion liv ve show is Raymond usually just Robert Raymo ond spinning andd ether ethereal his soft acoustic guitar an eal

Marvin Mar vin Gaye, Stevie Stevie Wonder, Wonder, the

55 South, San Jose Free Mon, 6pm, Fr ee

Jackson Jack son 5, Erykahh Badu. Some of the best artistss in the past 50 weree on Mo Motown Records. years wer otown Recor ds. moree impor important Even mor tant than the rroster oster of artists was w the “Motown created, Sound”” they cr eated, which melded soul music with pop p sensibilities.

This Monday San Jose joins the growing cities (Brooklyn, gr owing list of cit ties (Br ooklyn, San Francisco, Chicago, Fr ancisco, Chicag o, Denver) ffor or the weekly Motown on o Mondays event.

(Cutso, Every week rresident esideent DJs (C utso, Butter,, Dstru Dstrukt, SmoovGroovs, Shea Butter ukt, SmoovGr oovs, DJ Quantum, The CME, Chatos spinning 1013) will be spin ning classic emixes, Motown ffavorites, avoritess, covers, rremixes, gems lesser-known gem ms and anything the umbrella that ffalls alls under th he umbr ella of Sound.” the “Motown Sou und.”” MOM SStarted tarted Francisco in San Fr ancisco in 2009, and has expand continued to expa and all over the year (AC) C) country every yea ar since. (A

LADY LAD Y GAGA GAGA June 3 at SSAP AP Center

THE PIANO GUY GUYSS June 27 2 at City National Civic

CHER July 2 at SSAP AP Center

JJUSTIN JUS TIN TIMBERLAKE Aug 11 at SSAP AP Center

KATY KA ATY T PERRY PERR RY Sep Se ep 22 22-23 -23 at SAP SAP Center For musi music ic updates and contest giveaways, giveaway ys, like us on Facebook at metrofb.com metrofb.com

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OLETA OLET TA AD ADAMS AMS March Mar ch 7 at at Montalvo Arts Center

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ARTS TS metroactive metr oactivve AR

*stage EDUCATING EDUCA AT TING RIT RITA A NorthsideTheatr Northside Theatree Company presents complicated pr esents the tale of a complica ated university rrelationship elationship between a univers sity lecturer hairdresser lectur er and hair dresser he is hired tutor.. Thu-Sat,, 8pm an and hir ed to tutor nd $17-$22.

Sun,, 3pm. Thru Mar 9.. $17 -$22.

Theatre, Olinder Theatr e,, San Jose.

FFAREWELL, AREWELL, FITZ FITZGERALD GERALD D A one-man show by actor KKurt urt Gravenhorst Gr avenhorst about the life life of o Fitzgerald. writer FF.. Scott Fit zgerald. ThuThhuFri, 8pm, Sat 3 or 8pm, Sun, $12-$36.

Theatree on SSan 2pm. $12 -$36. Theatr an Pedro Square, P edro Squar e, San Jose.

GAME ON San Jose Rep pr presents esents a playy about two sports ffanatics anatics swankyy LLos Altos wound up in a swank os A ltos home during a cocktail party to green projects. ojectss. rraise aise funds ffor or gr een pr 27-Apr Mar 27 -Apr 19. San Jose.

ONCE ON THIS ISLAND TheatreWorks pr TheatreWorks presents esents a musical set on a CCaribbean aribbean island about the rromance omance between a young peasant girl and a young aristocrat. aristocrat.

Wed-Sat, W ed-Sat, 8pm, Sun, 7pm, TTue, u ue, $25-$73.

7:30pm. Thru Mar 30. $25-$ $73.

Theatre, Palo Alto.

LLucie ucie SStern tern Theatr e, P alo Al to.

THREEPENNY OPERA San Jose SStage tage Company presents pr esents the landmark early 20th 2 Weill century musical by KKurt urt W eill and Bertoltt Brecht.

Bertol Brecht. Wed-Thu, Wed--TThu,, 7:30pm, 7:30pm, Fri-Sat,, 8pm and Sun,, 2pm. Thru Th hru Mar 30. $25-$50.

*dancee *danc FLAMENCO SOCIETY OF FLAMENCO SSAN AN JOSE

TTurner uurner and San Jose Chamber Orchestra Or chestra hold an open rrehearsal ehearsal with composers present. pr esent. March March 77,, 12:10-12:50pm.

12:10-12:50pm.

Free.

Fr ee.. Le Petit Petit Trianon, Trrianon, San Jose.

HISTOR HISTORY RY MUSEUM GATOS OF LLOS OS GA ATOS

SSJCO JCO STEPS STEPS OUT

HISTORY HIS TORY P PARK ARK SAN SAN JOSE

Barbar Barbaraa Day TTurner uurner leads the Orchestra San Jose Chamber Or chestra in program a pr ogram that includes tango, jazz, film music and includes premiere works.

March two pr emiere work s. Mar ch 9, Petit 7pm. $10-$60. Le P etit TTrianon, rianon, r San Jose.

call ffor or info info

*art MUSEUMS ART AR T MUSEUM OF LLOS OS GATOS GA ATOS “Unmasking the SStage: tage: The Visual Artists Behind the Theater Experience.” Thru March Mar ch 30. LLos os Gatos.

CANTOR CANT OR AR ARTS TS CENTER “Her Story: Story: Prints by Elizabeth Murray.”

WedMur ray.” Thru Mar 30. W edSun, 11am-5pm, Thu, 11am8pm. Stanford.

Stanford.

CHILDREN’S DISC DISCOVERY OVER RY MUSEUM

SSAN AN JOSE MUSEUM OF AR ART T “Around the TTable “Around able a SStage tage One—Jitish KKallat: allat: Epilogue.”

Ends April 20, 2014. ““Around Around A Creativity, the TTable: able: a Food, Cr eativityy, Community,” Community y,,” an exhibition that delves into how ffood ood has culture. shaped local cul ture. Thru April 27.. Tue-Sun, 27 Tuue-Sun, 11am-5pm, p closed Mon. San Jose.

SAN JOSE MUSEUM OF SAN QUILTS TEXTILESS QUIL TS & TEXTILE “Metamorphosis: Clothing and Identity.”

Identity .” Jan 29-Apr 27.

277. San Jose. Tasty, Taastyy, too! Starts Starts Jan 27.

29-Apr 27 7.

GALLERIES

“Sip. Do Not Gulp”, Gulp”, in conjunction with San Jose Art’s Museum of Art ’s “Around “Around The TTable” aable” exhibition. Thru Mar 16. “A “A Serving Serving of Shapes: An Exploration Explor ation in 3D Printing”,, workss by Corinne ffeaturing eaturing work TTakara. aakara. Thru Mar 16. Santa Clara.

Clar a.

DOWNTOWN DO WNTOWN CAMPBELL

Conductor Barbar Barbaraa Day

“Zulugrass Jewelry Gallery”,, “Zulugrass ffeaturing eaturingg the colorful clothingg and ornaments adorned by the Great Maasai tribe of the Gr eat Rift Valley V alley of KKenya enya and Tanzania.

Tanzania. a

DE SSAISSET AISSET MUSEUM

*concerts *c oncerts

LLUNCHTIME UNCHTIME A AT T TRIANON N

LLOS OS GA GATOS ATOS CCOMPANY OMPANY

TRIT TRITON ON MUSEUM OF AR ART T

DISCOVER DISC OVER SSAN AN JOSE

An all-Russian pr program ogram withh special guest Ilya YYakushev. akushev a . The T program pr ogram includes TTchaikovsky’s chaikovsk c ky’s Piano Concerto No. 1, Shostakovich’s No. Shostakovich ’s SSymphony ymphony N o.

Center.

9. Mar 15, 7:30pm. Flint Cent ter.

CCupertino. upertino.

“American Bohemia: The Cats “American Cats Estate in LLos os Gatos.” Thru April 20. Los Los Gatos.

“Pi Day Day,” y,,”” a part of Family Night March at the Museum. Mar ch 14. $20Playground,” $25. “Imagination Playgr ound,” ffeaturing eaturing giant blue building blockss to inspir inspiree cr creativity. block eativity.

Thru Mar 30.

A juer jjuerga, ga, or flamenco fl jam j presented session, pr esented by the academy, academy y, ffounded ounded in 1985. $12-$14.

Historic Mar 15, 7pm. $12 -$14. Histo ric Theater.. San Jose.

Hoover Theater

EL CAMINO Y YOUTH OUTH ANNUAL SSYMPHONY YMPHONY ANNU AL BENEFIT CCONCERT ONCERT

More More listings:

METROACTIVE.COM METR OACTIVE.COM

“An Evening in Italy”,, featuring “An featuring color and black & white photos by various artists. San Jose.

Third Friday Artwalk. Visit with Third exploree boutiques artists and explor thirdd Fri of and galleries. Every thir ampbell the month, 6-9pm.

6-9pm. E. CCampbell Ave. A ve.

“TTeerritories of Experience” “Territories Experience” a charcoal char coal drawing drawing exhibit by Meyer.. Thru. artist KKatherine atherine Meyer May 4. Opening reception reception Fri, Clara.

6pm-8pm. Santa Clar a.

ANNO DOMINI “We’s Gone Be Fine “We’s Fine”,”, work workss by Jeremiah Jer emiah Maddock. Opening Reception Fri, 7pm. “I SStand tand workss by Bill For Sacrifice,” work Dunlap. Thru Mar 22. San Jose.

ART AR T ARK GALLER GALLERY RY “Cr “Cross Cross Pollination”, Pollination”, collabor collaboration ation between the art ffaculty aculty and staff working in the Art Departments of Silicon Valley.

Vaalleyy. Opening rreception eception Fri, 7pm w/ live music Freya

by Fr eya Seeburger.

Seeburger. San Jose.

THE AR ARSENAL SENAL Recent work by KKatherine atherine LevinLau. Opening rreception eception Mar 77,, 77-10pm.

-110pm. Thru Mar 28. San Jose.

ART AR T BOUTIKI EUPHRAT EUPHRA AT MUSEUM “Deep Reading”,, a look at the intersection of humanity and traditional technology and tr aditional practices pr actices in the digital age.

Artworkss include one-of-aArtwork kind, small edition, and digital bookss with mixed artists' book media. Thru Mar 20. De Anza College, CCupertino. upertino.

“Despondency - A Midtown Show”,”, a Beat Art Opening Show post-Valentine’s Day, prepostValentine’s Day y, pr eheartbreak workss heartbr eak show with work Foley.. Fri, 7:30pm.

by Michael Foley

BRUNI BR UNI GALLER GALLERY Y Jazz-related art by Bruni Sablan.

Jazz-related Mon-Sat, 1-6pm. San Jose.

MACLA MA CLA

SEEING THING THINGSS GALLERY GALLER RY

“No Walls Walls Between Us,” portraits portr aits of jazz musicians by b KKathy athy Sloane. San Jose.

“Latino Art Now!” 16th Annual Art Auction and Exhibition.

Fri, 7pm. San Jose.

CAMERA12

MEZCAL MEZ CAL

“Connect” a Cinequest and “Connect” Phantom Galleries Live Art Davis, Contest w/ artists Jean Davis s, Avery LAuruS Myth and A very Palmer.

Palm mer.

Art by JJ.. Danniel. Mezcal Restaurant, Restaur ant, San Jose.

“TTangible “Tangible” a ” a hand printed Photography exhibition. Photogr aphy by Gore, Ben Gor e, Nich KKunz, unz, CCarson arson Lancaster,, Sam Milianta, Lancaster Jarod Espen SStokke, tokke, Jar od TTaber, aber a , Vutuc, Ramirez, Segej V utuc, Seth Ramir ez, Jason Lecras, Lecras, Brandon Brandon Getty, Gettyy, KKohlton ohlton Ervin.

Ervin. San Jose.

“Imagined Spaces, paintingss

by Ernest Regua.” Thru Mar 30.

3 9am-7pm, 9amM F i 9amMon-Fri, 9 -77pm, Sat, S t 9am 9 mGallery, Center, 3pm. Mohr Gallery y, Finn Cent ter, View..

Mountain View

CUKUI CUK UI “Retr “Retrospective” ospective” A Photo Seri Series ies Docuyanan.

Collection by Leo Docuyanan n.

Fri, Mar 14, 7pm. San Jose.

DOWNTOWN DO WNTOWN Y YOGA OGA SHALA A “Barefoot with the Larsens,”” “Barefoot workss by Andr Andrea work ea and Shannon Shannoon

EMPIRE SE SEVEN VEN SSTUDIOS TUDIOS New Work Work by ZooK 58 (aka) Antonio Nava TTorres. oorres. Thru Mar Maar 1. San Jose.

FILOLI FIL OLI “Filoli Instructors and their workss bbyy SStudents”, tudents”, ffeaturing eaturing work their Filoli’s art instructors and th eir students in the Visitor and Center.. Thru Mar 30.

Education Center 3 Woodside.

W oodside.

FIRST T FIRST TO O MARKET RESTAURANT RE STAURANT “Portraits of Things,” portraits “Portraits portraits

by Samantha YYee. eee. 399 South h First SStreet. treet. San Jose.

GALLERY GALLER Y HOUSE “Time and Again, W “Time Weaving eaving th the he Walk—Spain W alk—Spain 2011, 2012 andd woven, 2013,”” Anne Lamborn’s Lamborn’s wove en, dyed and ffelted elted interpretations interpretatioons of walking the CCamino amino de Palo Alto.

Santiago. Thru Mar 2. P alo A lto.

GALLERY GALLER Y SSARATOGA ARA ATOGA “The Big Pictur Picture,” e,”” gallery by abstract ffeatured eatured abstr act acrylic painter paintter Wed-Sun, Isaias Sandoval. W ed-Sun,, 11am11amWay, Saratoga.

5pm. Big Basin W ayy, Sar atoga.

GALLERY GALLER Y 85 “The Journey”” pr presented esented by Vernon the V ernon Davis Foundation n commemorate to commemor ate Black History Histoory Month. Thru Apr 224.

4. Santanaa Row, Row w, San Jose.

HIGHER FIRE CLA CLAYSPACE AYSPACE Ceramic display opening Ceramic demonstration and demonstr ation by Scott Jennings Fri, 8pm. San Jose.

KALEID GALLER GALLERY Y “Siddharta YYear”, eear ”, exhibit by Bryson Bost. “Fracture”, “Fracture”, exhibit exhibit

by Andy W Wallace. opening allace. Both openi ing rreceptions eceptions Fri, 7pm. San Jose.

Josee.

“Come Healing.” Six artists exploree healing and explor wholeness. Ongoing. Thu-Sun, 11am-3pm.

Saratoga.

11am3pm. Sar atoga.

MUSEUM OF QUIL QUILTS LTS & TEXTILESS TEXTILE “Metamorphosis: Clothing & Identity”,, ffeatures eatures various artists that chart the Area development of the Bay Ar ea Artwear movement starting from fr om the original Levi’s Contest”” of 1973 “Denim Art Contest workss of contempor contemporary to the work ary 27.. “T “Tasty designers. Thru Apr 27 Taasty offers TToo!” oo!” o off ers a look at the most needs—food, basic needs—f ood, warmth, community—showcasing it h i inspired quilts ffood ood inspir ed quil ts and from textiles fr om a private contemporary collection, contempor ary community.. artists, and the community Apr.. 27 27.

Thru Apr 7. San Jose.

PACIFIC P ACIFIC AR ART T LEAGUE LEAGUE “Abstractions ” and “S “Abstractions” “Stamps tamps Paper”.

27.

Crafts on P aper ”. Thru Feb 27 7. Cr afts exhibit by Phyllis Lee. Thru Palo Alto.

Mar 31. P alo Al to.

PALO P ALO AL ALTO TO AR ART T CENTER “Pencils Down” “Pencils Down” explor explores es the artistic possibilities of creating graphite cr eating intricate gr aphite drawings.

Palo dr awings. Thru April 13. P alo Alto.

Al to.

PHO69 PHO6 9 Phantom Galleries pr presents esents Gianfranco ““Journals” JJournals” by Gianfr anco Paolozzi.

P aolozzi.

PSYCHO P SYCHO DONUT DONUTSS Works by John Renzel, Lacey Works Bryant, Nicolas CCaesar, aesar, Murphy Adams, Christine Benjamin, Michael Foley, Foleyy, Valery Michael Borja, V alery Milovic, Carlos Carlos Villez, Eric Joyner,, Laur Lauraa CCallin Joyner allin Bennett, John Hageman and Robert McColley.. San Jose.

McColley

SAN JOSE INS SAN INSTITUTE TITUTE OF ART CCONTEMPORARY ONTEMPORAR RY AR T “Erased LLoop “Erased oop Random Walk,” sculptures W alk,” kinetic sculptur es by Berlier.. Thru Feb 15.

TTerry er e ry Berlier “Toriawase,” “T Tooriawase,” which juxtaposes traditional tr aditional and historical Japanese art and objects contemporary with selected contempor ary Western Co-curated W estern artwork. Co-cur ated 22-May

by Misako Mitsui. Feb 22 -May 17.. TTue-Fri, 17 uue-Fri, 10am-5pm, Sat, noon-5pm. San Jose.

00

SLIDING DOOR CCOMPANY OMP PA ANY Silicon V Valley alley Music Festival w/ solo guitarist Antoniy KKakamakov. akamakov. “One Thousand Project,” workss by Thousand Pr oject,” work McHenry..

Jason McHenry

SOUTH FIR FIRST ST BILLIARDS “The Soundtrack Soundtrack of Cinequest”,”, DJ competition w/ Cinequest DJ That Girl, DJ Shea Butter and The CME. San Jose.

STUDIO R STUDIO ROCK OCK CLIMBING GYM GY M “eYE mUNUDO” by Al “eYE Preciado.

Pr eciado. San Jose.

TECH TE CH SHOP SSAN AN JOSE Computerized ffabrication abrication pieces by artist KKat at Russo.

San Jose.

WORKS W ORKS SSAN AN JOSE “While You You o Are Are Here” Here” collaborated collabor ated pieces by Trina Trrina Merry Theresa Mer ry and Ther esa Because.

365 S. Market SSt, t, San Jose.

ZERO ZER O 1 GARA GARAGE GE “ZERO1 ZERO1 Fellowship/x,” a group group exhibition that showcases early prototypes prototypes of innovation challenges given to each of the artists.

San Jose.

*events *e vents CINEQUEST CINE QUEST An annual film ffestival estival premier showcasing pr emier films, emerging rrenowned enowned and emer ging artists, technology.. Mar 44-16. and new technology -16.

San Jose.

SARA SARATOGA ATOGA SIS SISTER TER CITY OPEN HOUSE A 30th anniversary celebr celebration ation of Saratoga’s Saratoga’s sister city rrelationship elationship with Muko, Japan. cultural With taiko drumming, cul tural crafts displays, cr afts and games.

Free.

Saratoga Mar 29, 1-4pm. Fr ee. Sar atoga Prospect Center..

Pr ospect Center

SOUTH FIR FIRST ST FRID FRIDAY AY ARTWALK AR TWALK A self-guided evening tour through thr ough galleries, museums, and independent businesses eaturing exhibitions and ffeaturing performances. special perf ormances. Fri, Mar 77.. 77-10pm.

-10pm.

MAY 29-JUNE 4, 2013 | metrosiliconvalley.com | sanjose.com | metroactive.com

COMMUNITY SCHOOL OF COMMUNITY ARTS MUSIC AND AR TS

MONTALVO MONT TA ALVO AR ARTS TS CENTER

EVENT

’THREEPENNY’ FOR YOUR THOUGHTS Cast members from San Jose Stage Company’s production of ‘The Threepenny Opera’ were among the artists who surprised patrons at at San Jose libraries with random acts of culture.

Random Notes MANY CHOOSE to study or read at a library because it's a quiet place with many resources—until a string quartet shows up and launches into Beethoven in the stacks.

Symphony Silicon Valley has been producing a series of “Library Acts of Culture” funded by the nonprofit Knight Foundation.

The acts of culture included classical and musical theater performances and live oil painting at San Jose libraries.

Last Friday, the Pearl Avenue branch of the San Jose Public Library was the eighth and final location in which Victoria Morton and her string quartet performed as part of the program.

As the quartet entered the library with their instruments strapped to their backs, many of the library's patrons continued going about their business.

Morton began tuning her viola in the back of the library, which started to attract attention.

When the four musicians lined up in the center of the library and began bowing their instruments, it was loud enough for the entire library to hear, but only a handful of people came over to watch the random act.

However, when the performance was over, applause could be heard from all corners of the library as people went back to their work.

In the style of a flash mob, the quartet packed up their things and were out the door as soon as they were finished.

The entire event took the musicians about 15 minutes from parking their cars to driving away.

Morton said these flash mob performances are a great way to showcase a type of music the audience may have never heard live.

“I'm hoping that we can touch people enough that they would seek out more live performances of musicians,” Morton says, “and hopefully want to learn more about classical music.”

San Jose native Christina Cortez says she was overwhelmed with the performance at the Pearl Avenue branch.

"I came to do such boring work and then I heard this beautiful music coming from the middle of the library," Cortez said. "I was hoping they would play more songs, but I think they accomplished their goal because it left me wanting more."

Lee Kopp, director of the ArtSPARK outreach program at Symphony Silicon Valley and organizer of Library Acts of Culture, says he tries to keep these events a secret.

"We only told the head librarian at each branch, so even some of the staff are surprised when the random acts occur," Kopp says. "Performing in a library seems like a bad idea because people go there to enjoy the silence, but there have been virtually no complaints."

—Jerry Salas

225 5 MARCH M A R C H 5-11, 5-11 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com osiliconvalley com | sanjose sanjose.com coom | metr metroactive.com oactive com

STRITCH CAFE STRITCH

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FILM FESTIVAL 2014

WORDS AND PICTURES

EAST SIDE SUSHI

KISS ME, YOU FUCKING MOR MORON ON

3/8 7:00 PM Clive Owen (C (Children Children of Men)) and Juliette Binoche Bin noche (The English Patient) P ) star in a playful romanc romance ce about a “war” between an English teacher an and nd an art teacher teacher..

3/8 7 PM | 3/9 1:45 PM P | 3/13 4 PM World W orld Premiere – A Latina La atina chef finds herself in a cutthroat Japanese kit kitchen, tchen, fusing both food and culture to re-ignite herr passions for food and life.

3/7 9:30 PM | 3/9 11:00 am | 3/12 6:45 PM STATES UNITED ST ATES T PREMIERE: After a young actress and her new leading man m (the school jock) clash, they both find that theirr chemistry may extend beyond fantasy in this charming c and highly entertaining tale about teenage e angst and finding your first love.

PARALLEL P ARALLEL MAZE MA AZE

ACTING LIKE ADULTS ADULLTS

APP

3/6 9:30 PM | 3/8 2:30 PM | 3/12 2:45 PM WORLD PREM PREMIERE: MIERE: In parallel worlds, there are many other ‘yo ‘you’ ou’ existing in this Hitchcockian n roller coaster thriller t set in China.

3/8 7:15 PM | 3/9 4:0 4:00 00 PM | 3/14 4:15 PM World W orld Premiere – Whe When en a hopeless romantic enters his girlfriend and himself himsself in a scavenger hunt, where the grand prize is an engagement ring, will she be whistling “Here e Comes The Bride” across the finish line or not?

3/14 MIDNIGHT | 3/15 4:30 PM P North American Premiere – Th The he “First Film for the Second Screen,” audience audiences es will download an app to their phone prior to the screening and take a roller coaster journey in this taut thriller. thriller.

Interactive and full of surprisin surprising ng twists, App puts YOU in the adventure...if you are a brave enough to leave your phone on.

CONNECT. The Cinequest Film Festival 2014 is about connecting People and Worlds. And the power of film and innovations to transform us through inspiring and meaningful connections.

MARCH 6 7:15PM

GRAND PIANO STARRING ELIJAH WOOD

INCLUDING MEDIA LEGACY AWARD CONVERSATION

HARRY KNOWLES

MARCH M ARCH 4-16 4 -16

CINEQUEST.ORG CINEQUE EST.ORG | 408 295 FEST

MARCH M A R C H 5-11, 5-11, 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com o osiliconvalley .com | sanjose.co sanjose.com om | metr metroactive.com oactive.com

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28

Cinequest Cinequ quest FILM HOME MY PRAIRIE HO OME

HAPPENINGS HAPPENING GS OF THE EIGHTH D DAY AY

(77 min. min.;; English English)) Firstly Firstly, y, My Pr Prairie airie Homee fills its pur purpose rpose as a National Boardd of CCanada Film Boar anada film. It shows great nation—the Prairie off that gr eat na tion—the Pr airie Provinces especially, from Pr ovinces especi allyy, fr om the golden fields to the t diamond glory Athabasca glacier.. Our guide of the A thabascaa glacier is Alberta ffolk-rocker olk-rocker o Rae Spoon, transgender a slim tr ansgendder guitarist with button-down, crew-cut ew-cut a ’50s button-do own, cr nerdd look. andd bespectacled b t l d ner l k Rae R from tyrannical was an escapee fr om a tyr annical Pentecostal P entecostal family famiily afflicted by loss schizophrenia. and schizophr enia. Spoon tours solo Greyhound

by Gr eyhound (The (The Dog and its many lot stations look a lo ot cleaner north of border), performing cafes the bor der), perf o orming at caf es and church Spoon brave chur ch halls. Spo oon is a br ave soul, pure with a sweet, pu re voice but the songwriting is soo the nose: there’s there’s between no space betwee en the music and theree is in the the original hurt,, as ther grain-belt work (to begin with) w of gr ain-belt Joni rrefugees efugees like Jon ni Mitchell and Neil Spoon moree compelling YYoung. ooung. I find Spo on mor when the artist iiss playing with a band instead of as a a solo act, and moree inter interesting mor estingg when Spoon is interviewed being inter vieweed along with others, these even though the se others (an old brother) defer Spoon’s br girlfriend, Spoon’s other) def er thee artist. It It’s completely to th ’s hard hard to watch a moviee with a subject who is never contradicted—even conntradicted—even if society itself is ceaselessly ceaselessly trying to contradict to pigeonhole adict that person, contr p Spoon into one sex. s (Richard (Richard von Busack) W Wed, eed, 3/ 3/5, /5, 7pm (C12);; Sat, 3/8, 2pm (C12); Tue, Tuue, 3/11, 7:15pm.

(C12)

(79 min.; min.; English) English) Iranian-American Iranian-American Ghavamian ian made Happenings Arya Ghavam of the Eighth Day while living locally before before decamping decam mping ffor or New YYork, oork, hence lots of location work on Paseo Paseo de San Antonio.

Antonio. Like many young filmmakers, Ghavamian G finds his subject in thee making of his own film, as a young Iranian director Iranian a dir ector in San Jose finds his eff efforts orts to complete his movie secret i thwarted thwart th tedd by b a sinister i i t secr ett organization. organization. Short scenes alternate alternate among self-conscious self-coonscious discussions about the script scriipt and actors; moody visual interludes interluddes that sometimes morph into complete coomplete light-pattern abstractions; abstractions;; mysterious clips of a woman wandering wanndering through through the fountain fountain jets at a Plaza de Cesar Chavez;; and harsh montages of h political strife strife and atrocity, atrocityy, from from Vietnam to Iraq Iraq a to 9/11. Ghavamian displays somee stellar chops at cinematography, cinematograpphyy, editing and sound design (with help h from from musical director director Endika).

Endikka). No technique is left unturned:: fuzzy focus; focus; dialogue jumping in and annd out of sync;; sudden caesuras caesuras in the thhe soundtrack; soundtrack; backdrops backdrops where naturally where they don’t doon’t natur ally belong, microphones microphones and clap-boards clap-boards front front and center; text teext blocks blocks onscreen onscreen (à laa early God Godard); dard); monologues delivered cameraa and delivered straight straight to the camer many more. card, more. As As a calling car d, the film impresses; impresses; unfortunately, unfortunatelyy, all the tricks obscuree rather tricks obscur rather than illuminate whatever message messsage Ghavamian wants to impart. (Michael (Michael S. Gant) Thu, 3/13, 9:15pm, 9:15pm, SSJJ Rep;; Fri, 3/14, 7pm, C12;; Sat, 3/15, 5:15pm, C12

GO DO DOWN WN DEA DEATH AT TH (88 min. min.;; English English) h) With the black and photography, apphyy, turn-of-thewhite photogr 20th-century sett setting, ting, and stil stilted ted line readings readings worthy of a Guy Maddin film and featuring featurin ng a cameo by a guy in a gorilla suit, suit, Go Down Death goes down slowly slowly but uneasily. uneasily.

Jimmy Lee Ji L Phelan’s Phela Ph lan’s ’ immaculate i l t cinematography cinematography and other-worldly set design in a converted coonverted Brooklyn Brooklyn warehouse warehouse evokee Becket, Tom Toom Waits Waits and David Lynch.

Lynch.. But director director Aaron Aaron Schimberg Schimberg seems seems determined to thwart any audience audieence expectations by confining his underwritten underwritten characters characters to awkward aw wkward dialogue and an increasingly increasingly fragmented fragmented mis-enscene: all in the name of New York n York o dada, I suppose. Go Down Death does not make for for o easy viewing, but among the alienating alienaating affects affects are are shards shards of great great beauty, b beauty y, such as a young boy (Rayvin (Rayvin Disla) singing. Go Down Death is for for o those willing to suffer suffer for for their art. art. (Don Hines) Mon, 3/10, 3:45p 3:45pm pm (C12); W Wed, eed, 3/12, 6pm (C12);; Fri, 3/14, 3/ /14, 9pm (C12);; Sat, 3/15, 11am (C12)

THE HANDSS OF ORLA ORLACC (1924) The best (1924) besst version of this tale of a transplant transplant gone awry is the powerful creeper creeper by KKarl arl Freund/ Freund/ Peter P eter Lorre Lorre Ma Mad ad Love Lovee (1935). It was just saluted inn the RoboCopp remake, remake, in the scenes of the mechanical hands h d plucking pluckin l ki g outt chords chor h ds d on an acoustic guitar. guitaar. In the silent original, Conrad Conrad Veidt Veidt reteams reteams with his director director Robert Wiene from from The CCabinet aabinet of Dr.r. CCaligari Dr aaligari. Veidt Veidt e has the title rrole, ole, a classical pianist pianist maimed and given a new pair of hands—the haands—the hands of a convicted andd executed mur murderer. derer. The direction direction tends tendds to be antique,, as when Wiene keeps cutting c to pages of the diary of the madman.

But the suave m and frightening frighteninng Veidt Veidt brings total conviction to this, t and it’s it’s easy to see the truth behind behind the old movie poster claim:: “Women “Women Fight for for Conrad Conrad Veidt!”

Veidt!”

With Dennis James’ James’ own hands on the California California Theater’s Theaater ’s Wurlitzer, Wurlitzerr, it should be nightmare nightmare material.. (RvB) Sat, 3/14, 7pm, 7pm m, California Calif a foornia Theatr Theatre. ree. Meet and greet at Orchestria Palm grreeet to follow ffoollow o Orrchestria c Paalm Court,, 27 E. William St., Wi St., San Jose.

REVIEW

PURPLE’S PROSE Comedian Edwin Li began as the subject of a documentary about comedians and ended up as a co-writer on a feature film about a comedian’s life.

Szymanowski Matters AT CINEQUEST this year, the director of the feature film The Purple Onion, filmmaker Matt Szymanowski—working “just down the street from San Jose” in San Francisco—aims to get the audience to help him decide how to proceed. “It’s a sneak preview of the rough cut, and we’re looking for audience response and feedback to show us what’s working, and what isn’t.

It’s a great opportunity to showcase the film in an intimate setting.” The Polish-born filmmaker already had a very good and intriguing 32-minute short, History of Solitude, at the 2009 San Francisco International Film Festival. He directed it at the famed Polish film school in Lodz, where Kieslowski and Polanski studied. Szymanowski had also worked as a volunteer at Cinequest years ago.

He sums up The Purple Onion, which he wrote at the MacDowell Art Colony: “It’s about people figuring out how they need each other. In San Francisco, there’s a struggling Chinese-American comedian, not making things happen—he’s troubled by women and work. He’s got one friend, really, and then someone shows up from his past, a motherly figure—is she his mom? His aunt? It’s up to the audience to decide. Her presence is at first a distraction, but then she helps him find strength within himself: that thing that he needs to achieve.”

Szymanowski had gone to San Francisco State University to learn filmmaking but dropped out after a few months. He promised himself he’d have a feature film done by the time he would have graduated.

The idea for The Purple Onion came from some time Szymanowski spent working at Cobb’s and other comedy clubs in San Francisco. He’d originally thought of making

a documentary about Edwin Li (not to be confused with San Francisco mayor Edwin Lee), a local comedian who had just relocated to Los Angeles. He’d been hauling around video equipment recording Li’s performance and offstage life.

“January 1, 2011, I woke up at 4am with an epiphany,” Szymanowski said. “This film isn’t supposed to be a U.S. (78 min.) documentary; this is going to be a feature Sun, 3/9, 7:15pm film about the trials (C12); Tue, 3/11, 7pm and tribulations of a (Rep); Sat, 3/15, failing comedian, a sad 9:15pm (Rep) clown type.” Li now has story credit on the film.

The director took the title of his indie film from a well known San Francisco nightclub that finally expired. “It’s in honor of that very famous club on Columbus Avenue where Woody Allen and Phyllis Diller performed—it closed in 2012, and they’re going to change it into a little restaurant.

The original plan was to shoot there and have a grand finale scene, to ground the film in the city and reality. And then it closed. We figured the title was great, very abstract—it could mean anything, regarding layers or tears.”

Coming in a little past the deadline he set for himself, Szymanowski is almost finished; clips of The Purple Onion are on YouTube already, though the $20,000 he raised on Indiegogo is depleted. One of the matters he’d like to discuss with the audience is an additional Kickstarter or crowdfunding campaign to finish this film. “We’re bouncing around a lot of ideas,” he says.

—Richard von Busack

metroactive FILM

229 9

REVIEW

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 12 IN SAN JOSE LOG ONTO FOXSEARCHLIGHTSCREENINGS.COM AND ENTER THE RSVP CODE SANJGBH FOR YOUR CHANCE TO WIN PASSES. PASSES ARE LIMITED.

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SSend end entries entries along along w with ith yyour our ttelephone elephone and and email email address addres e s to to Grand B Grand Budapest udapest Hotel, Hotel, c/o c / o Metro Metro 550 550 South Sou uth FFirst iirrst Street, Street, S San an JJose, ose, C CA A9 95113 5113 Deadline D eadline for for entries entries is is Monday, Monday, March March 10, 10, 2014.

2014. One One winner winner notified n ot i fi e d bbyy eemail/telephone mail / telephone and and must must be be able able to to pick pick up up his/her his / her prize prize by by Wednesday, March 2014 55:00pm : 0 0 pm oonn W ednesday, M arch 12, 12, 20 14 or or prize prize will will bbee fforfeit. or feit .

THIS FILM M IS RA RATED ATED R FOR L LANGUAGE, ANGUAGE, SOME SOM ME SEXUAL SEXUAL CONTENT CONTENT AND VIOLENCE. VIOLEN NCE. Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee admission. Seating Seatting is first come, first serve. ser ve. Except Except for members memb bers of the reviewing press. No No one will be admitted adm mitted without a ticket or after the screening begins. b Fox Fox Searchlight Searchlight Pictures, M Metro etro N Newspapers, ewspapers,, Capers, Capers, A Allied-THA, llied--THA, ticktBox and their affiliates affiliattes accept no responsibility or liability in connection conn nection with any loss or accident incurred in connection c with this prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, e transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole who ole or in part. We We are not responsible if, for any an ny reason, winner is unable to use his/her ticket tick ket in whole or in part. V o oid where prohibited by law No purchase necessary. necessar y. NO PHONE PHONE CALLS! CALLS! Void law.. No

IN SELECT SELECT THEATRES THEAT TRES MARCH MARCH A 14 14

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INVITE YOU AND A GUEST TO ATTEND A SPECIAL ADVANCE SCREENING OF

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metroactive MUSIC

Full Circle

HE’S H E’S THE THE DJ DJ After working as a recording g artist, producer and running g his own label, roots DJ.. labe el, DJ Jazzy Jeff returns to his ro oots as a DJ

DJ Jazzy Jaz zzy Jeff brings decades of experience expe erience to Myth Mytth Lounge Lounge BY B Y DAVID DAVID D MA

S

EASO EASONED ONED hip-hop fans of a certain age will reme ember Jazzy Jazzy Jeff Jeff as remember part of DJ Jazzy Jazzy Jeff Jeff & rap duo The Fresh Prince, a rap n in the late ’80s that began Willl Smith went solo before Will becam me a Scientologist. and became The pair had had massive massive hits hits,, performing p erfo orming on o the Grammys Grammys when rap was was still considered considered a tolerable songs fad. Their son ngs weren’t weren’t the most politically charged, p olitically ch harged, but in an era wheree Publicc Enemy wher Enemy was was on the radio,, the theyy k kept radio e their heads above ept above water fun, lighthearted w ater by by offering off ffeering e lighthearted tracks.. tracks placee The two two understood un nderstood their plac never to provoke and ne ver attempted attempted t provoke

p olitical disc political discourse ourse in w ways, ayys, ffor or o eexample, x xample , Bo ogie Down Pr o ductiions Boogie Productions di id. But songs like like “Summer timee” did.

“Summertime” orr “P arents JJust ust Don’t Don’t U nderstan nd” “Parents Understand” w wer ovin ng weree fun and memorable memorable,, pr proving th hat the ’s p erhaps the that theyy did what what’s perhaps h ardest thing ffor or an o pop ar tist to t hardest anyy pop artist do o —be cconsistently onsistently catchy. catchy. do—be He ’s the DJ J, I’m The Rapper Rapper He’s DJ, w as the ttwosome’s wosome’s first rrecord, ecord, was de ebuting in 19 88. It w as an outin ng debuting 1988. was outing off simple beats beats and even even simplerr rh hyymes ab out girls parents, sp orr ts rhymes about girls,, parents, sports fa antasies and rrelatable, elatable, eeveryday ver ydaay fantasies m misadv entures. It ’s a time JJeff eff misadventures.

It’s rremembers e ememb b ers well, ll as he h pr epares to t prepares br ring his renowned renowned DJ chops ne x xt bring next w week to San JJose’s ose’s Myth nightclu ub. nightclub.

“It ’s all ab out the lo ve and stil ll “It’s about love still h avving fun," JJeff eff says. saayys. "I started star ted off o having ass a DJ ecame a rrecording ecordingg DJ,, then b became ar rtist and pr o ducer. Then I owne ed artist producer. owned m el and even even acted a bit. b myy own lab label

now,, in 2014, it goes circle And now g es full cir go cle being [laughs]. and I’m back to b eingg a DJ [laughs ]. wouldn’t have anyy other way.

I wouldn ’t ha ave it an way. “ days Will Smith hardly These da ays y W iill Sm mith is har dly “Fresh Prince” anyy cconsidered onsidered a “Fr esh Princ P e” or an semblancee of a rapp rapper, semblanc er, yyet et JJeff eff is top-notch still widely regarded regarded as a a top -notch DJ,, tra traveling world DJ aveling the worl ld and rocking ro cking shows in a variet ormats o . Lik varietyy of fformats.

Likee most DJ s, he w as insp pired b DJs, was inspired byy older DJ s, guys who controlled controlled the entir DJs, entiree par ty on music al whi ims while yyou ou party musical whims sto od and w atched. stood watched.

“I alw ayys just w be that antted to be always wanted guy y,," JJeff eff says. saayys. "I rremember member b em eing guy," being at a club in Philly and d just sitting sitting and st aring at the DJ and watching watching staring him ccontrol ontrol hundr ed ds of p eople hundreds people just with his tunes ept going all tunes.. Itt k kept night dep ending on how h depending he strung the h rrecords ecords d to gether h . He H w as just j together. was ccontrolling ontrolling the mo od and making mood p eople happ k w that ’s people happyy and I kne knew that’s what I w anted to do .” wanted do.”

T o this da ay, Jeff Jeff get To day, getss the same pangs of eexcitement. xcitement.

“I still get that same sam me feeling feeling e as if I w as that kid at the bl lock par ty who was block party

pla ayed tho ose tunes and made people people played those happ ppy,," hee sa ayys. "I’m older now and happy," says. ccompletely ompletelly underst and what I am understand doing ve go es nowher e, it ’s doing.. Thee lo love goes nowhere, it’s the skill th hat’s grown. grown. N ow I can can that’s Now go to JJapan apaan or A ustralia and rrock o ck Australia cr owds b e ause I know my ec my job ’s crowds because job.. It It’s not har d ffor or o me to st ay rrelevant elevant hard stay b ecause I’m m talking talking to DJ because DJss all week.

My friend ds ar s. We We swap swap music friends aree DJ DJs. and ideas and remixes. remixes. It ’s not hard hard It’s to st ay rrelevant elevant if it ’s something stay it’s that yyou ou llove.” ove.”

Indeed, the Bay Baay Area’s Area’s large large DJ ccontingency ontingen ncy shows a lot of respect respect ffor or JJeff. o eff ff.. In n an era when everyone everyone is a DJ it’s eeasy asy to weed out the wack wack DJ,, it’s fr om the go ggods. ds. Though JJeff eff himself from is world rrenowned, e enowned, he ’s nothing but he’s humble howing rrespect espect to lo cal humble,, sh showing local legends w hom he now considers considers whom — even calling calling the Bayy Ar ea buddies— buddies—even Area a “sec ond home .” “second home.”

In the Ba B ay Ar ea, you’ll you’ll ll be be har d Bay Area, hard pr essed to o find an yone with pressed anyone T echnics who w does does not know who Technics Q -B Bert or Shor tkut are, are, both b oth hailing Q-Bert Shortkut fr om the legendar llegendaryy Invisbl Invisbl Skratch from Piklz. And d Jazzy Jazzy Jeff Jeff is one of their biggest fan ns. “Me and Shor tkut ha ave fans.

Shortkut have pla ayed in Singap ore and Manila played Singapore to gether,” sa ayys Jeff.

Jeff ff.. together,” says “I’v ayed at Might or o lik “I’vee pla played Mightyy ffor likee ffour our or fiv o ve hours from from funk, to five rap use," he sa ayys. "II love love those rap,, to hou house," says. ccats ats in thee Ba ay b ecause y’ all ar Bay because y’all aree so music al with w yyour our talent. talent. I just get a musical lot of insp piration from from p eers. inspiration peers.

"Q Q -B Bert is like like the Jimi Jimi Hendrix "Q-Bert of the turn ntable. I jok turntable. jokee with Shor tkut and a ccall all him a Swiss Arm Shortkut Armyy Knif fe b ecause a whatever you you want, want, Knife because whatever he ’ll provide. proviide. I mean, when I’m in he’ll the Ba ay, I’ll I’ll go to Thud R umble u Bay, Rumble Headquar rters or I’ll go to Q -B Bert’s Headquarters Q-Bert’s house tkut will go house.. Mee and Shor Shortkut get Dunge eness crab at a local local spot. spot.

Dungeness I ha ave m have myy ritual of wher wheree I go to eat, who I go to see and all that. I lo ve the Ba B ay and ccan’t an’t w ait to b love Bay wait bee ther agaiin. It’s It’s funny funny because because I’ve I’ve theree again. done so man m manyy things in the music industr b in the end, I’m a DJ industryy but again. N ott much I ccan an ask ffor.” o or.”

Not

DJ JAZZY JEFF MARCH

7

8pm

Myth, San Jose Opening sets by DJ Goldenchyld and Wrex Bangerzz GW rex of The Banger

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MARCH M A R C H 5-11, 5-11, 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com o osiliconvalley .com | sanjose.co sanjose.com om | metr metroactive.com oactive.com

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32 10

WOODHAMS W O OD HAMS L O U N

1011 PACIFIC AVE. SANTA CRUZ 831-423-1336 Wednesday, 4HYJO ‹ AGES 18+

DATSIK

also

plus Heroes & Villains Must Die! 3PEC !DV !DV s P M

Wednesday, March 5 ‹ In the Atrium s AGES 16+

AER plus RDGLDGRN also New Beat Fund !DV $RS '! TIX W ALBUM s P M P M

Thu., March 6 AGES 16+ plus

Greensky Bluegrass

Tumbleweed Wanderers s P M P M

Thursday, March 6 ‹ In the Atrium s AGES 18+

KALYA SCINTILLA

also Bird Of Prey

plus Kaminanda !DV $RS s $RS P M 3HOW P M

Friday, 4HYJO ‹ AGES 18+

Downlink / Dieselboy Ajapai

Sam F.

plus also and Labrat vs Downsqurez

and

Andrew The Pirate

!DV $RS s P M Friday, March 7 ‹ In the Atrium s AGES 16+

BAEZA !DV - ' s P M P M Saturday, 4HYJO ‹ AGES 16+

BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY !DV $RS s $OORS P M 3HOW P M Saturday, March 8 ‹ In the Atrium s AGES 21+

SIN SISTERS BURLESQUE

!DV $RS s $RS P M 3HOW P M

Rebecca & Fiona

Sun., March 9 AGES 18+ plus Nause 3PEC !DV !DV s P M Mon., March 10 AGES 21+ !DV $RS s $OORS P M 3HOW P M Tue., March 11 AGES 18+

MICHAEL McDONALD

plus

SHPONGLE Vokab Kompany

Desert Dwellers

also

!DV $RS s Doors 7 p.m./ Show 8 p.m.

SiliconValleyRestaurantWeek.com

Unless otherwise noted, all shows are dance shows with limited seating.

Tickets subject to city tax & service charge by phone 877-987-6487 & online

www.catalystclub.com

metroactive metr oactivve MUSIC

33

More More listings:

METROACTIVE.COM METR OACTIVE.COM

Metro’s M etro’s music calend calendar dar runs W Wednesday–Tuesday. ednesday–Tuesday y.

Karaoke Kar aoke

MARCH M A R C H 5-11, 5-11, 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com ossiliconvalley.com | sanjose.com m | metr metroactive.com oactive.com

Rock/Pop Rock/P op

Dancee Clubs Danc Clubs AGENDA A GENDA

ALEX’S ALEX ’S 4 49ER 9ER INN THE CA CATS ATS Every Thu:: Out of the Blue.

Ferrara.

Every Sun, 6pm:: Joe Fer rara. Fri, F 8:30pm: 8pm:: Bornia Boys. Sat,, 8:30pm m: Joint Chiefs. Los Los Gatos.

Nightly Nightly, g y, 9pm9pm-2am: p 2am: KKaraoke. araoke.

San Jose.

BRANHAM LLOUNGE OUNGE

CITY NA NATIONAL ATIONAL T CIVIC Wed, Mar 12, 7pm: Emblem3,, Wed, MKTO Guthy.

MK TO & Jackson Jackson Guthy y. $29.

San Jose.

Wed: Salsa W Wed: Wednesdays. ednesdays.

Thu: Noche De Bandas. Sun: Vybez.

Reggae V ybez. San Jose.

BLINKY’S BLINK Y’S CAN’T SSAY AY Sat, 9pm9pm-1am: 1am: KKaraoke. araoke.

Clara.

Santa Clar a.

BOGART’S BOGAR T’S LLOUNGE OUNGE

Wed: Almaden V Wed: Valley alley Beer Pong ONEmanARMY. P ong with DJ ONEmanARMY Y. Thu: Audio Revolution with Hi-Grade.

DJs Jason Dee & Hi-Gr ade.

Control VJ1.

Fri: Quality Contr ol w/DJ V JJ1.

Dreams Sat: Cocktails & Dr eams w/DJ Aspect.

A spect. TTue: uue: Irie Nights w/DJ Hi-Grade Hi-Gr ade & TTesfa. eesfa. San Jose.

Wed, Fri & Sun, 9pmWed, 9pm-1am: 1am: KKaraoke. araoke. Sunnyvale.

THE HUDDLE Fri-Sat, 9:30pm9:30pm-1:30am: 1:30am: Free. over.r.

Live bands. Fr ee. 21 and over Fremont.

Fr emont.

THE CARA CARAVAN AVAN Mon, 10pm: Mandatory Monday KKaraoke. araoke. San Jose

THE CCOURT’S OURT’S LLOUNGE OUNGE THREE DE DEGREES GREES

Thu & Mon, 9pm: KKaraoke. araoke.

Darryl.

Sat, 8:30pm: Joe or Dar ryl.

CCampbell. ampbell.

BLACKBIRD BLA CKBIRD T TAVERN AVERN V Thu,, 7pm:: Ladi6, The Jur Jurassic. assic.

Residency.

–The Residency y. Fri,, 8pm: Amber Gougis.. Sat,, 9pm:: Myele Manzanza Trio Trio r ffeat. eat. Mark de eat.

Clive-Lowe.

Clive-L owe.. Every TTue, uue,, 7pm:: Now w DJ TTuesdays.

Dig This! Guest DJT uuesdays.

San Jose.

Thu: DJ Nico and DJ Neeber Neeber..

San Jose.

CARDIFF LLOUNGE OUNGE Every second and ffourth ourth Sun: Return of the Boom underground electronic Zap, under ground electr onic ampbell. music. CCampbell.

Everyy Thu 6:306:30-9:30pm 9:30pm p & Fr Fri, ri,, 7:30-10:30pm: Allll 7:3010:30pm: Live music. A Ages. Free.

Free. LLos os Gatos

Jazz/Blues// World W oorld

BRIT ARMS ALMADEN

DIVE B BAR AR Thu,, 10:30pm:: Rotating Guest DJs.

THE GOOSET GOOSETOWN OWN LLOUNGE OUNGE Fri-Sun, 9:30pm9:30pm-1:30am: 1:30am: KKaraoke. araoke. Willow Glen.

PSYCHO P SYCHO DONUT DONUTSS Sun, 10am: Psycho KKaraoke. araoke.

CCampbell. ampbell.

THE QU QUARTER ARTER NO NOTE TE

FFAHRENHEIT AHRENHEIT Wed, 9pm:: Wine Wednesdays.

Wed, Wednesdays.

Thu: Liquid Thursdays, with guest DJs spinning hip-hop, TTop op o 40 and R&B. Fri, 9pm: Heit Fridays. $10. Sat, 9pm: CCall all ffor or iinfo. inf fo. Mon: M : Industry IIndustry. d t y. San S Jose.

J

TTue: uue: KKaraoke. araoke. Sunnyvale.

MOTIF MO TIF

RED SSTAG TAG LLOUNGE OUNGE

Fri: DJs & dancing. Every ffourth ourth Sat: Thrive. Sun: Only.. San Jose.

Members Only

Nightly karaoke, karaoke, 9pm9pm-1:30am.

1:30am.

San Jose.

REDI R ROOM OOM

MYTH T TAVERNA AV VERNA LLOUNGE OUNGE

LLOFT OFT BAR BAR AND BIS BISTRO TRO

Every Thu, 9pm: Ther Therapy apy Thursday.

Thursday y. Every Fri, 9pm: Soul Therapy.

Ther apyy. Every Sat: Social Saturdays.

Satur days. San Jose.

Every Thu: Live jazz in the evening San Jose. evening.

Jose

WILLOW WILL OW DEN

Thu-Sat, 9pm: DJ CCurtis. urtis.

San Jose.

Mon: Magic Mike Mondays.

Wed-Fri: W ed-Fri: DJs. Willow Glen.

ZEN LLOUNGE OUNGE

LLOU’S OU’S VILLA VILLAGE GE Live music. San Jose.

MOSAIC MOS AIC Fri-Sat, 6-9pm: 6-9pm:: Jazz for for dinner. dinneer.

San Jose.

Thursdays & Friday Night 9pm ~ 11pm

THE X B BAR AR TTue uue & Fri, 9pm: KKaraoke araoke with KJ Vinnie. CCupertino. upertino.

Thu: Reverse Happy Hour Hour..

Every first Fri: Famous. Every second & ffourth ourth Fri: Diamond.

Sat: Girls Night Out. View..

Mountain View

90 Skyport Drive San Jose, CA (408)392-0212

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34

EVENT

VALLEY OF HEART’S DIVIDE Hip-hop artist Andrew Bigelow tackles economic disparity in Silicon Valley.

’Gold’ Strike

Growing up with five siblings in San Jose’s working-class east side gave Andrew Bigelow personal insight into Silicon Valley’s yawning gap between rich and poor.

Especially once his parents scrimped enough to send him to Archbishop Mitty High, the expensive parochial academy known for its football team and schooling the offspring of well-heeled valley residents.

“I started to realize that there were two worlds at play,” he says, one of gangs and gunfire and another of relative ease and opulence.

That realization shaped much of his work once he started writing, rapping and producing music in his later teens.

And it’s the driving theme in his song “Gold Out West,” whose video debuts as part of an art event and panel discussion on wealth inequality and the dearth of housing and jobs Thursday evening at Camera 12 Cinemas.

“I believe in the power of music to bring these very real issues to light, put them on blast and make the conversation bigger,” says Bigelow, who goes by the stage name SoCiety.

“Gold Out West” video premiere and community forum Thu, 6:30-8:30pm Camera 12 Cinemas, San Jose 408.998.3300

Inspiration for the piece came to the 23-year-old last fall, after a 30-mile march with a cohort of fixed-income residents organized by affordable housing advocates. They walked from Story and King roads to the pristine corporate campuses of Apple and Google as part of a procession to protest the region’s stark economic disparities, where an ascendant tech economy disrupts and displaces the impoverished.

“The contrast really struck me,” he says. “On the outside, people observe Silicon Valley as one of the wealthiest places in the world. But for a lot of us, we see through another lens. For me, I view it through the experience of my parents, my family and my community. We see the struggle and the poverty and the violence, which is as much a part of this place as the latest technology.”

While the affluent and networked-in see opportunity as always on the horizon, the disadvantaged consider it out of reach.

“When talking about wealth and opportunity, there was always, like, a past tense to it,” he says. “Like, this is how it used to be—these streets were paved with gold. But growing up post-recession, it is no longer. ” He hopes the discussion will spawn solutions by bringing together various groups faced with dwindling opportunity and rising costs of living in the shadow of enormous wealth.

“We live in this world of incredible contrast,” he says, “that is San Jose culture, that is Silicon Valley culture. It’s not this perfect, innovative tech enclave that the outside sees. It’s full of success stories of people who have found a way to make a lot of money, of companies making millions of dollars. But there are so many people here whose lives haven’t changed.”—Jennifer Wadsworth

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Weekend W e eek kend specials and Raffle Winners e every very e w week eek at YB.

Thursday Thursd day Top Top o Shelf Specials

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** L Limit imit 2 $10 G Gram ram o on nT Top op SShelf helf SSpecials pecials p per er P Patient atient YB Amber Pearl 2129 S. 10th St. San Jose, CA A 95112 95112 (of ff Tully Tully Rd.) (off

YB Saratoga 4211 Barrymore Dr. Dr. 4211 San Jose, CA A 95117 95117 (of ff Saratoga Ave.) Ave.) (off

Valley YB V a alley Fair 325 S. S Monroe St. San Jose, Jo ose, CA A 95128 (Of ff Stevens Stevens Creek) (Off

Branham YB Bran nham rl A ve.

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YB Phoenix 1324 N. 10th. St. San Jose, CA A 95110 95110 (Hwy Gish h) (Hwy.. N. 880 & Gish)

EACH YB IS INDEPENDE INDEPENDENTLY ENTL LY OWNED AND OPERA OPERATED ATED T AS A CAL CALIFORNIA LIFORNIA A NONPROFIT ORGANIZATION ORGANIZA ATION T IN I ACCORDANCE WITH CA A PROP 215, SB SB 420, CA A HS11362.5 HS11362.5 & HS11362.7 HS11362.7

MARCH 5-11, 5 -1 1 , 2014 | metr metrosiliconvalley.com o osiliconvalley .com | sanjose.co sanjose.com m | metr metroactive.com oactive.com

Waxy W a axy Wednesday We ed dnesday - 3Gm ffor or $85

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A LLT TERNA AT TIVE MEDICINE

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metroactive.com | sanjose.com | metrosiliconvalley.com | MARCH 5-11, 2014

10 44

THE STRAIGHT DOPE

By CECIL ADAMS

CECIL@METRONEWS.COM I'll get straight to the point: What's up with penis-stealing sorcerers in Africa?

I've heard large mobs adamantly believe their penises have been stolen using black magic. How is it so many people can have the same hallucination? How often do these penis-theft hysterias break out? —Jim, Baltimore Hysteria? Come now. In the age of identity theft and other first-world problems, it’s almost refreshing to have an issue that speaks to the brotherhood of man.

I acknowledge you don’t get many substantiated cases of penis theft in, say, Paris. While rumors of genital larceny appear sporadically throughout the world, most commonly they’re found in developing nations with poorly educated tribal cultures where belief in witchcraft is still strong. In Senegal, for example, it’s believed penises can be stolen by cannibal witches, or via impotence spells cast by sorcerers, or simply by ordinary, everyday evil spirits.

A penis-theft episode typically involves four stages. First the “victim” has an odd encounter, such as a stranger unexpectedly shaking his hand. Next is the sensation of an electric shock or chill traveling to his genitals. Third, he checks his crotch and becomes convinced his penis, testicles, or both have been stolen or shrunken. The final step is crying “Thief!” and enlisting others to confront the suspect, sometimes with the “victim” stripping on the spot to prove his genitals are gone. When an epidemic swept Nigeria in 1990, men walked around grasping their penises to prevent theft.

The result of this delusional drama can be pretty ugly. About 20 witches accused of penis theft were lynched in Nigeria in 2001, and 12 in Ghana in 2002. One survey counted 56 separate cases between 1997 and 2003, with at least 36 suspected thieves murdered.

From a glance at the reports it’s evident that in many if not most cases the claim isn’t that your genitalia have disappeared without a trace; rather, you think they’re shrinking. There’s a perfectly ordinary explanation for this—namely, the operation of the cremaster muscles, which pull the testes toward the body, typically in response to cold or fear. This is usually accompanied by a tingling sensation that could easily be interpreted as electric shock.

The mystery is why this commonplace experience should be taken as a sign of the dark arts. The default explanation is mass hysteria, which tells you nothing.

A slightly shrewder take on things is that penis theft and other bizarre outbreaks in the developing world are “culturebound syndromes,” which suggests

they’re pathologies confined to mobs of superstitious yokels. But the germ of truth is that penis theft is a local manifestation of a broader phenomenon.

Consider Southeast Asia, home of a disorder known as koro, where your penis isn’t stolen but rather starts to withdraw into your body. If you don’t halt the process by grabbing your member or tying it down with string or wire, supposedly it will retract completely inside you, with fatal results. Sometimes attempts to avoid this fate cause severe penile injury, to the point of requiring amputation.

Koro isn’t blamed on sorcery. In 1967 an outbreak in Singapore was triggered by a rumor, repeated in news reports, that eating meat from pigs inoculated against swine fever would lead to koro. While pork rotted on the shelves, frightened men crowded the hospitals, with 469 “victims” by the time the panic ran its course.

In 2004 a koro outbreak in the Guangdong region of China started when a third grader became convinced his penis was shrinking. While his mother held the kid's member, a local healer used traditional medicine to “cure” him. That might have been that, except the school principal then felt compelled to announce that boys should be careful of their penises.

Numerous students suddenly felt their penises shrinking until the same healer put things right. On the bright side, a mere 64 kids professed to be afflicted, an improvement over an earlier koro outbreak in the region that affected more than 2,000.

What’s going on? The likeliest explanation is what’s been called “the witchcraft of modernity”: in a rapidly urbanizing society, when you dump a bunch of bumpkins into the middle of a faceless crowd, you can’t be surprised when some of them get weird.

Although you can find tales of disappearing penises in antiquity, penis theft as a mass-market phenomenon is relatively recent, first showing up in Nigeria in the early 1970s and spreading to most of West and Central Africa by the 1990s. The scenario is easy to picture: teeming Lagos, a frightening encounter with a stranger, the activation of the cremaster. Add in journalists uncritically spreading wild tales, and we understand the frisson victims experience: it’s the shock of the new.

ADVICE GODDESS

By AMY ALKON

AdviceAmy@AOL.com

My girlfriend of six months just stopped shaving her legs and armpits. I think she is so sexy—except for this. Recently, I asked her whether she’d shave again, and she snapped that shaving is time-consuming and the idea that women should remove their body hair comes from anti-feminist propaganda.

I don’t know about that. I just like seeing female legs and armpits without a bunch of dark furry hair cover. Do I get to ask again?—In The Thick Of It It’s great when your girlfriend reminds you of somebody exotic out of the movies—when that somebody is Mila Kunis or Eva Mendes, not Chewbacca.

As for your girlfriend’s notion that the defurred look traces to “anti-feminist propaganda,” way back before there was Cosmo, there was Ovid, the Roman poet, advising women looking for love: “Let no rude goat find his way beneath your arms” (don’t let your underarms get stanky like a goat), “and let not your legs be rough with bristling hair.”

Archeological evidence (including hairscraping stones and an impressive set of Bronze Age tweezers) suggests that women—and often men—have been shaving, depilating, and yanking out body hair since at least 7,000 B.C. In the early 1500s, Michelangelo sculpted David (who would have been a hairy Middle Eastern dude, looking more Borat than baby’s bottom), making him look like he was too busy spending three weeks at the waxer to slay Goliath. And these days, male bodybuilders also remove their body hair, lest their admirers have to peer through the hair sweater to find the pecs and abs.

You, likewise, would just like to see your girlfriend’s legs without having to

send your eyeballs off on a search party through Furwood Forest. (You must look back fondly on the days when you could picture her naked without first giving her a mental bath in a vat of Nair.) Is there a double standard at play here? Sure there is—if you’d shave a Fidel Castro beard to be more attractive to her but she refuses to shave her Fidel Castro legs.

Let her know that you aren’t looking to turn her into a razor slave of the patriarchy—you’re just trying to keep your sex life (and, in turn, your relationship) alive—and ask whether there’s anything you could do to be more manhunky for her. This is just what you’re supposed to do in a relationship— make that extra effort to please your partner, even if it takes, oh, five minutes every few days to run a razor over your legs and pits. She can still rebel against the patriarchy in other ways, like by going around in snarky T-shirts and blogging about how leg shaving is an obvious plot to keep women in the shower and out of the House of Representatives. The bottom line, for you and many other men, is that it’s really sexy to run your hand through a woman’s hair—just not the hair on her ankles.

Is it really that inappropriate to give a girl your number instead of asking for hers? I met a cool girl at the gym. We really seemed to hit it off, and I asked whether we could get a drink sometime. She said yes, and I said, “Here, I'll give you my number.” She said, “Um, don't you want my number?” Well, I just offered her mine because she had her phone with her and mine was in the locker room, but apparently she was offended. Really? Who cares? —Hung Up On An Issue Giving this woman your number and expecting her to call you is like the lion saying to the gazelle, “Would you mind coming over here and killing yourself, and then I’ll eat you?” For millions of years, there’s been a natural order of things and it involves men chasing women, and it hasn’t heard of Gloria Steinem and doesn’t care that your phone is in the locker room. Sure, women these days may sometimes pursue men, but when you want a woman, do you really want to walk away without her phone number and hope she’ll call—which most women

won’t do? Also, chances are, expecting a woman to call you comes off a little insulting—telling her you’re interested in her, just not interested enough to lift a finger and touch it to phone buttons 10 times. In other words, the thing to do was to toddle off and get a writing implement and a scrap of paper so you could take down this woman’s number and call her, not try to rewrite male and female psychology and dating practices for your convenience: “Great meeting you! I’ll just be sitting home painting my toenails and waiting for the phone to ring.”

©2014, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 550 S. First St., San Jose, CA 95113, or email adviceamy@aol.com.

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MARCH 5-11, 2014 | metrosiliconvalley.com | sanjose.com | metroactive.com

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10 46

classifieds PLACING AN AD

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Selectiva Systems, Inc. (San Jose, CA) has multiple openings for these 40/hr/ wk positions: Programmer Analysts, Senior Programmer Analysts, Oracle Programming Specialists resp for various lvls of programming, coding, scripting. Systems Analysts, Senior Systems Analysts, Oracle Systems Specialists resp for various lvls of analysis of user reqs, proc & prblms

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10 LEGAL & 48 metroactive.com | sanjose.com | metrosiliconvalley.com | MARCH 5-11, 2014

PUBLIC FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588787

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Bay Mobile Services, 419 Fremont Ave., Los Altos, CA, 94024, Marcel Vinson.

This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 2/24/14. Refile of previous file #588784 with changes. /s/Marcel Vinson This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/27/2014. (pub Metro 3/05, 3/12, 3/19, 3/26/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587539

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Maxpros Electronics, 11797 Pine Brook Ct., Cupertino, CA, 95014, Raphael K.Y Hwang. This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 1/28/2014. Refile of previous file #520694 with changes. /s/Raphael K.Y Hwang. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/28/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587694

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: The Lab Guy, 1398 Garrans Dr., San Jose, CA, 95130, David Moncayo. This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/David Moncayo This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/30/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588495

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Just B. Massage, 15814 Winchester Blvd., Suite 102, Los Gatos, CA, 95030, Bridget Eding, 916 Union St., Apt 203, Alameda, CA, 94501. This business is conducted by an individual.

Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 5/01/2008. Refile of previous file #509024 with changes

/s/Bridget Eding. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/20/2014. (pub Metro 3/05, 3/12, 3/19, 3/26/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588078

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Lucky You Furnishings, 775 N. 10th St., Suite 192, San Jose, CA, 95112, Shane Costanza, 471 Wainwright Ave., San Jose, CA, 95128.

This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Shane Costanza This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/10/2014. (pub Metro 3/05, 3/12, 3/19, 3/26/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588513

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: FCPWORKS, 8401 Washington Pl., N.E., Albuquerque, NM, 87113, SIMPLEMENTE US, Inc. This business is conducted by a Corporation. Above entity was formed in the state of California Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 17Feb-2014. /s/Monica Reina President #2717486 This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/20/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588426

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: 1. Omnicentrix, 2. Centrix Realty, 3. Centrix Mortgage, 5598 Farmhouse Ct., San Jose, CA, 95123, Tuan Nguyen. This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 02/01/2014. /s/Tuan Nguyen. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/19/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587699

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Billionaire Hippies, 1491 Goldenlake Rd., San Jose, CA, 95131, Jaylene Caampued. This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant has not yet

begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Jaylene Caampued. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/30/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588374

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Japonica, 592 N. 5th Street, San Jose, CA, 95125, Ngoc Yen T Do, 1674 St. Anthony Dr., San Jose, CA, 95125, Paul Sakamoto, 2437 Bookisin Ave., San Jose, CA, 95125, Ken Matsumoto, 655 Palm Haven Ave., San Jose, CA, 95125. This business is conducted by a general partnership.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Ngoc Yen T. Do This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/18/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588405

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: J & V Machining, 671 Aldo Avenue, Suite #9, Santa Clara, 95054, Kelvin Nguyen, 6222 Rubicon Ave., Newark, CA, 94560, Vivian Nguyen, 1782 Oakland Rd., #15, San Jose, CA, 95131.

This business is conducted by a general partnership.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Kelvin Nguyen This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/19/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588383

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: AC Energy Solutions, 15220 Oak Ridge Way., Los Gatos, CA, 95030, AC Mechanical Systems, Inc. This business is conducted by a Corporation. Above entity was formed in the state of California. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Robert Herzig President #C3313405. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/18/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT

#587439

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: CD Smog Test Only, 468 Auzerais, San Jose, CA, 95126, Cindy Dinh, 5469 Ellyridge Dr., San Jose, CA, 95123. This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant has not yet began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Cindy Dinh. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/27/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588381

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Monster Tree Service of the South Bay, Inc, 745 E. San Salvador Street, San Jose, CA, 95112, Santa Clara Valley Tree Care, Inc. This business is conducted by a corporation. Above entity was formed in the state of California.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Thomas Gay CEO #C3636597. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/18/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588339

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Leon Phillip Motors Group, 1638 E. San Antonio St., San Jose, CA, 95116, Alan Nguyen. This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Alan Nguyen This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/14/2014. (pub Metro 2/26, 3/05, 3/12, 3/19/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587997

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Runway Cafe, 1250 Aviation, STE 130, San Jose, CA, 95110, Air Culinaire Worldwide, 5830 W. Cypress St., STE B&C, Tampa, FL, 33607. This business is conducted by a Limited Liability Company. Above entity was formed in the state of Delaware Registrant has not yet begun name or names listed herein. /s/Deena Barcus VP of Finance #200832310110. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/06/2014.

(pub Metro 2/19, 2/26, 3/05, 3/12/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588269

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: 1. Affordable Vacations International, 2. AVI, 530 Lawrence Expressway, #513, Santa Clara, CA, 95814, The Forseti Group LLC, 1017 L Street, #278, Sacramento, CA, 95814. This business is conducted by a Limited Liability Company. Above entity was formed in the state of Delaware. Registrant has not yet begun business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Norman Brown #4779063 This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/13/2014. (pub Metro 2/19, 2/26, 3/05, 3/12/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587277

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Alvarez Consulting, 4281 Littleworth Wy., San Jose, CA, 95135, Ruben Alvarez.

This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 1/1/2013. /s/Ruben Alvarez. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/22/2014. (pub Metro 2/19, 2/26, 3/05, 3/12/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587452

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: 1.

Reign Clothing Company, 2. R.C.C, 2591 Pantalis Dr., San Jose, CA, 95132, Ricardo Sarabia.

This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Richard Sarabia This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/27/2014. (pub Metro 2/19, 2/26, 3/05, 3/12/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587898

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Dr. K’s Dental Group, 1888 Saratoga Ave., STE 102, San Jose, CA, 95129, Olga Khevsurishvili, 720 Cypress Ave., San Jose, CA, 95117.

This business is conducted by an individual.

Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 3/1/2009.

Refile of previous file #520623 with changes. /s/Olga Khevsurishvili This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/05/2014. (pub Metro 2/19, 2/26, 3/05, 3/12/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #588104

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: D.A. Yoder Commercial Real Estate, 900 Lafayette Street, Suite 201, Santa Clara, CA, 95050, Douglas A. Yoder, 1570 Georgetta Drive, San Jose, CA, 95125.

This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Douglas A. Yoder This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/11/2014.

(pub Metro 2/19, 2/26, 3/05, 3/12/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587999

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Triple Win Technologies.

2200 Monroe St., #1702, Santa Clara, CA, 95050, Kelly Jaimes Heily. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Kelly Heily This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/0/2014. (pub Metro 2/12, 2/19, 2/26, 3/05/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587786

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Back N Balance, 5754 Santa Teresa Blvd., San Jose, CA, 95123, Zhouran Wang, 305 E. Empire, San Jose, CA, 95112. This business is conducted by individual.

Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 4/24/2013.

Refile of previous file number #577735 with changes. /s/Zhouran Wang This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/03/2014. (pub Metro 2/12, 2/19, 2/26, 3/05/2014)

STATEMENT OF ABANDONMENT OF USE OF FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME #587785

The following person(s) / entity (ies) has / have abandoned the use of the fictitious business name(s):

Back N Balance, 5754 Santa Teresa Blvd, San Jose, CA, 95123, Hong Juan Wong, 195 Blossom Hill Rd., #114, San Jose, CA, 95123. This business was conducted by an individual. Filed in Santa Clara county on 4/24/2013.

Under file no. 577735. /s/Hong Juan Wong This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/03/2014. (pub Metro 2/12, 2/19, 2/26, 3/05/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587965

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Vintellisys, 566 Balsam Ave., Sunnyvale, CA, 94085, Thornton Jacobs. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Thornton E. Jacobs This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/06/2014. (pub Metro 2/14, 2/19, 2/26, 3/05/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587741

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: NX Gear, 351 Chateau La Salle Dr., San Jose, CA, 95111.

Linh Chau. This business is conducted by a individual.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Linh Caau This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/31/2014. (pub Metro 2/12, 2/19, 2/26, 3/05/2014)

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: National Avenue Medical Associates, 14911 National Ave., #1, Los Gatos, CA, 95032, John P. Smith MD, A Professional Corp. This business is conducted by a Corporation. Above entity was formed in the state of California Registrant began transacting business under the ďŹ ctitious business name or names listed herein on 05/11/1983. ReďŹ le of previous ďŹ le #303570 after 40 days of expiration date. /s/John P Smith President #C1173604 This statement was ďŹ led with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/31/2014. (pub Metro 2/12, 2/19, 2/26, 3/05/2014)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587851

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Deja Vu, 989 Story Rd., #8018, San Jose, CA, 95122, Phi Chung, 1899 Westminister Ct., San Jose, CA, 95132, Phi Chung, Phuoc Trinh, 1876 Mabury Rd., San Jose, CA, 95133.

This business is conducted by a general partnership.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the ďŹ ctitious business name or names listed herein.

ReďŹ le of previous ďŹ le #585338 with changes. /s/Phi Chung This statement was ďŹ led with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/04/2014. (pub Metro 2/12, 2/19, 2/26, 3/05/2014)

Metro Classifieds To advertise call 408.200.1300 or visit metroactive.com

Screen Printing

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real estate SALES OAK KNOLL

‡ &25325$7( $33$5(/ ‡ 7($0 :($5 ‡ '(6,*1 6(59,&(6

408.452.5582 mrtees1@aol.com 1 7+ 675((7 81,7 % 6DQ -RVH &$

Approximately 1/2 acre in Bear Creek Estates. The seller has completed almost all of the county pre-development requirements to determine buildability. PG&E and SLV water are available onsite.

Property recently surveyed and the geotechnical and archaeological reports are also available. Bear Creek Estates has a shared septic system which is like a sewer system. This ag lot has a beautiful gated entrance and plenty of sun. An ideal commute location. Owner ďŹ nancing available. $185,000. Call Deborah Donner for an appointment 408.395.5754 or visit www.donnerland.com

CREEKFRONT SETTING 9+ Off Grid acres. A beautiful creek front setting with a pretty meadow. A sunny, happy place to garden. Bit of a rough road to get there. Excellent owner ďŹ nancing. $157,000. Call Deborah Donner for an appointment 408.395.5754 or visit www. donnerland.com

MITCH’S MEADOW 5+ Off Grid Recreational Acres on a Private Road. This sunny parcel features a year round creek and almost one at acre of land. Only 15 minutes to downtown Boulder Creek. Ask about Owner Financing, $150,000. Call Deborah Donner for an appointment 408.395.5754 or visit www.donnerland.com

FREE! Home Value Reports!

Sell your home for the highest value!

DRE #01046633 Call or text 408.940.5355 today!

APT FOR RENT Bascom/880 Studio. Rosegarden area, 1824 Davis St., #5. Ground oor, air conditioning.

Great shape, quiet, no pets. $900, $950 deposit. 1 year lease, manager Apt 2.

Water and garbage paid.

925.786.8510

11 49 MARCH 5-11, 2014 | metrosiliconvalley.com | sanjose.com | metroactive.com

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #587745

metroactive.com | sanjose.com | metrosiliconvalley.com | MARCH 5-11, 2014

10 50

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY ARIES (March 21-April 19): Are you between jobs? Between romantic partners? Between secure foundations and clear mandates and reasons to get up each morning? Probably at least one of the above.

Foggy whirlwinds may be your intimate companions.

Being up-in-the-air could be your customary vantage point. During your stay in this weird vacationland, please abstain from making conclusions about its implications for your value as a human being.

Remember these words from author Terry Braverman: "It is important to detach our sense of self-worth from transitional circumstances, and maintain perspective on who we are by enhancing our sense of ‘self-mirth.’”

Whimsy and levity can be your salvation, Aries. Lucky flux should be your mantra.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The renowned cellist

Yo Yo Ma once came to the home of computer pioneer Steve Jobs and performed a private concert. Jobs was deeply touched, and told Ma, “Your playing is the best argument I’ve ever heard for the existence of God, because I don’t really believe a human alone can do this.” Judging from the current astrological omens, Taurus, I’m guessing you will soon experience an equivalent phenomenon: a transcendent expression of love or beauty that moves you to suspect that magic is afoot. Even if you are an atheist, you are likely to feel the primal shiver that comes from having a close brush with enchantment.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In my dream, I was

leading a pep rally for a stadium full of Geminis. “Your intensity brings you great pleasure,” I told them over the public address system. “You seek the company of people who love you to be inspired. You must be appreciated for your enthusiasm, never shamed. Your drive for excellence doesn’t stress you out, it relaxes you. I hereby give you license to laugh even louder and sing even stronger and think even smarter.” By now the crowd was cheering and I was bellowing. “It’s not cool to be cool,” I exulted. “It’s cool to be burning with a white-hot lust for life. You are rising to the next octave.

You are playing harder than you have ever played.”

CANCER (June 21-July 22): “My old paintings no

longer interest me,” said the prolific artist Pablo Picasso when he was 79 years old. “I’m much more curious about those I haven’t done yet.” I realize it might be controversial for me to suggest that you adopt a similar perspective, Cancerian. After all, you are renowned for being a connoisseur of old stories and past glories.

One of your specialties is to keep memories alive and vibrant by feeding them with your generous love. To be clear, I don’t mean that you should apologize for or repress those aptitudes. But for now—say, the next three weeks—I invite you to turn your attention toward the exciting things you haven’t done yet.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I recommend that you sleep with a special someone whose dreams you’d like to blend with yours. And when I say “sleep with,” I mean it literally; it’s not a euphemism for “having sex with.”

To be clear: Making love with this person is fine if that’s what you both want. But my main point is that you will draw unexpected benefits from lying next to this companion as you both wander through the dreamtime. Being in your altered states together will give you inspiration you can’t get any other way. You won’t be sharing information on a conscious level, but that’s exactly the purpose: to be transformed together by what’s flowing back and forth between your deeper minds. For extra credit, collaborate on incubating a dream. Read this: http://tinyurl.com/dreamincubation.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “One chord is fine,” said

rock musician Lou Reed about his no-frills approach to writing songs. “Two chords are pushing it. Three chords and you’re into jazz.” I recommend his perspective to you in the coming weeks, Virgo. Your detail-oriented appreciation of life’s complexity is one of your finest qualities, but every once in a while—like now—you can thrive by stripping down to the basics. This will be especially true about your approach to intimate relationships. For the time being, just assume that cultivating simplicity will generate the blessings you need most.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You Librans haven’t received enough gifts, goodies, and compliments lately.

For reasons I can’t discern, you have been deprived

By ROB BREZSNY week of March 5

of your rightful share. It’s not fair! What can you do to rectify this imbalance in the cosmic ledger? How can you enhance your ability to attract the treats you deserve? It’s important that we solve this riddle, since you are entering a phase when your wants and needs will expand and deepen. Here’s what I can offer: I hereby authorize you to do whatever it takes to entice everyone into showering you with bounties, boons, and bonuses. To jumpstart this process, shower yourself with bounties, boons, and bonuses.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “The art of living is

more like wrestling than dancing,” wrote the Roman philosopher Marcus Aurelius more than 1,800 years ago. Is that true for you, Scorpio? Do you experience more strenuous struggle and grunting exertion than frisky exuberance? Even if that’s usually the case, I’m guessing that in the coming weeks your default mode should be more akin to dancing than wrestling. The cosmos has decided to grant you a grace period—on one condition, that is: You must agree to experiment more freely and have more fun that you normally allow yourself.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): For the itch you are experiencing, neither chamomile nor aloe vera will bring you relief. Nor would over-the-counter medications like calamine lotion. No, Sagittarius. Your itch isn’t caused by something as tangible as a rash or hives, and can’t be soothed by any obvious healing agent. It is, shall we say, more in the realm of a soul itch—a prickly tickle that is hard to diagnose, let alone treat. I’m guessing that there may be just one effective cure: Become as still and quiet and empty as you possibly can, and then invite your Future Self to scratch it for you.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The world is awash in bright, shiny nonsense. Every day we wade through a glare of misinformation and lazy delusions and irrelevant data. It can be hard to locate the few specific insights and ideas that are actually useful and stimulating. That’s the bad news, Capricorn. Here’s the good news: You now have an enhanced ability to ferret out nuggets of data that can actually empower you.

You are a magnet for the invigorating truths you really need most.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): If you come up with an original invention, apply for a patent immediately.

If you think of a bright idea, put it to work as soon as possible. If you figure out crucial clues that everyone else seems blind to, dispel the general ignorance as quickly as you can. This is a perfect moment for radical pragmatism carried out with expeditious savvy. It’s not a time when you should naively hope for the best with dreamy nonchalance. For the sake of your mental health and for the good of your extended family, be crisp, direct, and forceful.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In the 1997 film Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery, the lead character announces that “‘Danger’ is my middle name.” Ever since, real people in the U.K. have been legally making “Danger” their middle name with surprising regularity. I think it would be smart fun for you Pisceans to add an innovative element to your identity in the coming days, maybe even a new middle name. But I recommend that you go in a different direction than “Danger.” A more suitable name might be “Changer,” to indicate you’re ready to eagerly embrace change. Or how about “Ranger,” to express a heightened desire to rove and gallivant?

Homework: What were the circumstances in which you were most dangerously alive?

FreeWillAstrology.com.

Go to REALASTROLOGY.COM to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. Audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700

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