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THIS MODERN WORLD

9p TOM TOMOROW

I SAW YOU

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ISawYou@metronews.com Send us your anonymous rants and raves about your co-workers or any badly behaving citizen—or about citizens you admire. I SAW YOU, Metro, 550 S. First St., San Jose, 95113, or via email.

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Dumb Meters

Did you ever wonder what that smart meter that your gas and electric company wants to install on your house is going to cost? Maybe you are off the grid with your own

solar panels and you think, “I won’t have to pay for that.” Sorry, there will be a bill and almost everyone will be on the hook to pay. Utilities aren’t telling us much about this, and for good reason. So, what is the sticker price for smart-meter technology?

Let’s take the state of Maryland as an example. In the summer of 2009 the Department of Energy (DOE) offered Baltimore Gas and Electric (BGE) $200 million to jump-start a smart-meter program. That works out to about $167 per customer. In order to get this money, state regulators and BGE had to agree to charge their ratepayers all remaining costs. There are additional “hidden costs” as well. Smart meters will allow utilities to adjust energy costs by the minute. At times your electric rate may zoom to over $1 per

kilowatt-hour. When bugs are found in smart-meter software there will be an additional charge for the fix, and of course, ongoing charges will be levied to maintain the vast new network of hardware and communications.

Besides this high cost, there are security concerns as well. The National Institute of Standards and Technology has identified 189 security requirements that are of concern. Smart meters and the data they generate threaten the privacy of the homeowner, the security of businesses and ultimately our national security. Our present system is secure, paid for and robust enough to withstand almost any attack. Smartmeter technology, however, would open a new door to malicious hackers and foreign terrorists.

In summary, the widespread

installation of smart meters and their associated technology is unwise. It is nether green nor financially sound. The Hawaii Public Utilities Commission has pulled the plug on that state’s smartmeter program, saying that it did not appear to be cost effective.

If you are a business or homeowner you can refuse to allow the installation of smart-meter equipment on your property. If it has been installed, you can contact your utility company and insist that they remove it and reinstall the electromechanical meter.

Consumers need full disclosure of all costs, benefits and liabilities. Once they have this knowledge, they can drag this monster out into the light and deal with it in the appropriate way.

ROBERT SCHMIDT | APTOS

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sv 411.com YouMupett I think Twitter and Facebook appear in the search listings because many people, believe it or not, don’t use shortcuts or type in the url ... they actually google for facebook and twitter in order to get to the site!

David Webb I’m a little surprised

by Chatroulette, though the others are fine for me!

Kat Da Silva Got misty-eyed at the Google 2010 video. Helped me appreciate my humanity and how great it is to be a human animal. We are amazing creatures full of so much power.

J<8I:? :?8DG@FEJ K_\ JXe =iXeZ`jZf >`Xekj gcXZ\[ `e >ff^c\Êj Çq\`k^\`jkÈ c`jk f] k_\ p\XiÊj kfg j\XiZ_\j%

How the World Googled in 2010 GOOGLE HAS announced the results of its annual zeitgeist report, revealing the most popular search terms of 2010 by region and worldwide.

The search giant analyzed billions of searches performed in 2010 and compared them with searches from 2009 to surface emerging trends. Chatroulette, the iPad and Justin Bieber were the three fastest-rising search terms in 2010; Twitter and Facebook also made the list, at numbers eight and 10, respectively.

Among the items of interest that lost the world’s attention in 2010 were swine flu, Stephanie Meyer’s novel (and the accompanying movie) Twilight: New Moon, Susan Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire, “MySpace layouts” and Michael Jackson.

The iPad was the emergent search winner in the consumer electronics category, followed by the iPhone 4, Nokia 5530, HTC EVO 4G and Nokia N900.

In terms of news searches, Haiti proved the most popular, followed by Turkish sports club Besiktas, Chile, “earthquake,” Lady Gaga and the iPhone 4. The Gulf of Mexico oil spill ranked 10th. —LAUREN INDVIK, MASHABLE.COM

Open Cobra How did I NOT make that list? Crazy!

Apple, App Makers Sued Over User Tracking Apple and a number of iPhone app makers, including Pandora and Dictionary.com, were sued Monday for allegedly helping advertisers secretly create profiles of iPhone users — including their location — without their consent.

The suit, filed in federal court in Northern California, seeks both monetary damages and a court order to stop the profiling.

At issue is the practice of some app makers of passing identifying and location information about an app user to companies that show advertisements inside the apps. The apps do not ask permission to do so, nor do they make it clear to users that such information is being sent to third parties.

The tracking is possible because Apple assigns a UDID (Unique Device Identifier) to each iPhone, iPod Touch and iPad, and apps can access that number. Advertising companies figured out this number—akin to a social security number for a phone—can be used

for tracking, much like a cookie in a browser.

If an app passes that number along to an advertiser, the advertising company can use it to build up a profile of the user, as well as keep track of which ads it has shown to a user before and which of those ads the user clicked on.

Unlike browser cookies—which a user can easily block or delete to essentially cut off the profile— neither avenue is possible with apps that use the UDID, because the ID number can’t be changed.

The suit contends that apps that send that UDID, along with location information, to third parties violate computer- and business-fraud laws.

Apple is likewise responsible, the suit argues, because it approves all apps for the iPhone.

Apple’s developer rules were changed in the spring to prohibit apps from passing data to thirdparty advertisers, a prohibition that many saw as favoring Apple’s own in-app advertising program and which has not been enforced.

The practice of apps sending location data and the UDID came to light thanks to an investigation by the Wall Street Journal, published earlier this month.

The suit also comes just weeks after the Commerce Department and the Federal Trade Commission separately released reports calling for online advertising companies to clean up their acts and be more transparent with users. —RYAN SINGEL, WIRED. COM/EPICENTER

timinboey So, pretty much the same thing GM has been doing with OnStar for years, eh? By compiling data, advertisers retailers, automakers, etc know when you drove your car where, what store you went to, what kind of toilet paper you bought and what kind of shampoo you like. They know how many miles you drove last year, where you went on vacation, and if you change your oil on time. And a lot more. The story above is nothing compared to what’s been going on for years.

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rays at the head of the bolt, with almost no lingering radiation along the bolt’s trail.” This means that we now better understand where the radiation carried by lightning bolts comes from—and that we’ll soon have some more crazylooking images to use as desktop wallpapers. —ROSA GOLIJAN,

Zynga’s CityVille Bigger Than FarmVille We knew Zynga’s Facebook game CityVille was a hit if the company ever had one (and it’s had several already) but the growth that it is displaying is simply mind-blowing.

We’ll kick off by pointing out that the game was released on December 2, 2010, which is less than a month ago.

The company subsequently reported that in the game’s first 24 hours on Facebook, over 290,000 people had already played CityVille. A few days later: 3 million daily active users. And while you turned your eyes away from the screen for a few minutes: bang, 6 million active users.

Last week, the Sim City-esque game logged about 61.7 million monthly active users, effectively eclipsing its other hit game, FarmVille.

Today, CityVille is at close to 72.5 million monthly active users, which means that it has already outgrown FarmVille (which boasts roughly 57,4 million monthly active users) by more than 25 percent.

CityVille isn’t just the biggest game on Facebook, it’s now the biggest game on Facebook with one hell of a margin.

No wonder Google investor John Doerr famously said Zynga is probably his VC firm’s best investment to date. Its growth is simply astounding. —ROBIN WAUTERS, TECHCRUNCH.COM

kagilandam What a stupid way of wasting money and time by these many millions when millions are running around looking for a job to do.

The Gnome Like posting in the comment section of blogs is any better use of your time? distractmefrom.com I use Zynga engagement as a metric in evaluating how bad the economy is. In a vibrant economy there is no fracking way ppl

GIZMODO.COM

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can spend this much time, harvesting onions, and building towers.

ml Geez ... I’m seriously worried about the future of humanity.

virtualpants have you been saying this since pong came out in the 70s?

“Get of my lawn you stinkin’ kids! In my day we played with dirtballs and sticks.”

First X-Ray Images of Lightning Some madly brilliant scientists recently used a gigantic 1,500pound camera to capture X-ray images of lightning—which they triggered artificially using wires and rockets. Crazy? Maybe, but it’s definitely a beautiful experiment.

As a result of having a camera which could capture a lightning bolt traveling at one-sixth the speed of light, scientists JG<:@8C <==<:K have been JZ`\ek`jkj _Xm\ able to dXeX^\[ kf jfcm\ discover k_\ gifYc\d f] ZXgkli`e^ c`^_ke`e^ that there’s fe O$iXp Ó cd% Jk`cc X “a bright ball of Xdpjk\ip1 N_p6

two-oh-sickness Insert bad puns about a ‘shocking discovery’ here.

iPad Rules This holiday season, the iPad was pretty much the go-to device for consumers looking to gift a tablet.

In a note to clients this week, Wedge Partners analyst Brian Blair said recent retail checks point to significant year-end demand for the iPad. “Even with a handful of tablet competitors hitting the market, the iPad remained the only game in town in our holiday checks largely because many of the tablets hitting the market are junk for lack of a better word,” he wrote. “They are underpowered, poorly constructed and largely not ready for prime time.”

The holiday season is always particularly kind to Apple, but this year it may have been even kinder than usual. In addition to the iPad’s continued momentum at market, Blair observed stronger than expected holiday sales of iMacs, MacBook Pros and the new 11-inch MacBook Air. Sounds like Apple’s December quarter is shaping up to be another blowout. —JOHN PACZKOWSKI, DIGITALDAILY. ALLTHINGSD.COM

res08hao Yes, these were the choices: Apple iPad or CHEAP KOREAN PLASTIC That cost as much. SENT FROM MY IPAD mobileadmin Can we report facts vs. opinion after iFan opinion. What were iPad sales comapres to Galaxy, Kindle, Nook? Were iPad sales for 3G models or WiFi models??

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Dan Smith

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OPINION

The Conspiracy to Abolish Cash =FCCFN K?< DFE<P =\[\iXc I\j\im\ Efk\j Xccfn 8d\i`ZXej kf Zfe[lZk k_\`i Ylj`e\jj n`k_flk k_\ n_fc\ nfic[ befn`e^ n_Xk k_\pÊi\ lg kf%

@] Ó eXeZ`Xc kiXejXZk`fej Xcc Y\Zfd\ \c\Zkife`Z# \m\ip g`\Z\ f] Ylj`e\jj n`cc Y\ kiXZb\[ 9p TED RALL

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FI D8EP p\Xij Ó ^li\j fe k_\ gfc`k`ZXc ]i`e^\# \jg\Z`Xccp fe k_\ i`^_k# _Xm\ ZcX`d\[ k_Xk k_\ ^fm\ied\ek Xe[ `kj ZfigfiXk\ fne\ij nXek kf kiXej]fid lj `ekf X ZXj_c\jj jfZ`\kp% K_\`i nXie`e^j XYflk k_\ Zfejg`iXZp X^X`ejk gXg\i dfe\p ]\cc fe [\X] \Xij# gi`dXi`cp Y\ZXlj\ k_\ [`^`kXc`qXk`fe f] Ó eXeZ`Xc kiXejXZk`fej j\\d\[ dfi\ c`b\ k_\ i\jlck f] fi^Xe`Z Ylj`e\jj ki\e[j k_Xe k_\ dXe`]\jkXk`fe f] jfd\ j`e`jk\i Zfejg`iXZp%

Now, however, those who want to do away with liquid currency are stepping out of the shadows. They talk about increased efficiency and profit potential, but their real agenda is nothing less than enslavement of the human race.

“Physical currency is a bulky, germ-smeared, carbon-intensive, expensive medium of exchange. Let’s dump it,” argued David Wolman in Wired. Citing a 2002 study for the Organization for Economic Development that states “money’s destiny is to become digital,” a Defense Department–affiliated economics professor has authored an op-ed for The New York Times that asks: “Why not eliminate the use of physical cash worldwide?” Jonathan Lipow urges

President Obama to “push for an international agreement to eliminate the largest-denomination bills” and urges the replacement of bills and coins by “smart cards with biometric security features.”

Lipow’s justification for calling for the most radical change to the fundamental nature of commerce since industrialization is, of all things, fighting terrorism.

“In a cashless economy, insurgents’ and terrorists’ electronic payments would generate audit trails that could be screened by data mining software; every payment and transfer would yield a treasure trove of information about their agents, their locations and their intentions,” Lipow writes. “This would pose similar challenges for criminals.”

Terrorism is a mere fig leaf.

According to the annual “Patterns of Global Terrorism” report compiled by the U.S. State Department, the highest total death toll attributed to terrorism in the last 20 years occurred in—surprise—2001. Including 9/11,

only 3,547 people were killed in 346 acts of violence worldwide. Tragic.

Obviously. But, in the overall scheme of things, terrorism is not a big deal.

Measured in terms of loss of life and economic disruption, terrorism is a trivial problem, hardly worth mentioning. According to the United Nations, 36 million people die annually from hunger and malnutrition. Over half a million die in car wrecks—but you don’t hear people like Lipow demanding that we get rid of cars. A more legitimate concern is the “loss” of taxes upon the underground economy, estimated by the International Monetary Fund at 15 percent of transactions in developed nations.

What the anti-cash movement really wants is digital totalitarianism: a dystopian nightmare in which the entire human race is enslaved by international corporations and their pet governments. An antiestablishment gadfly like WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange could be instantly deprived of money—and thus freedom of movement—with

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Freedom vs.

Convenience A society without dissent has no hope. Even if we lived in a perfect world where everyone was ruled by wildly popular, benevolent, scrupulously honest regimes— ha!—eliminating the slightest possibility of opposition would lead to barbarism.

We’re already more than halfway to a cashless society. In the United States few young adults still use checks. In many countries debit and credit card transactions now exceed those made via cash and checks combined. In 2007 the chairman of Visa Europe predicted the abolition of cash by 2012. Obviously he was wrong. But that’s where we’re headed. The U.K. plans to abolish checking accounts by 2018.

Even if you love your government, don’t want it to change, and think political opponents belong in prison, you ought to worry. As things

currently stand, we know the big banks can’t be trusted. Remember when they introduced ATM cards?

Banks wanted us to use them so they could lay off tellers. Then they instituted “convenience fees,” which they have raised, and raised, to the point that taking $20 out of an outof-town ATM could cost you $5 in fees ($2 for their bank, $3 for yours).

Imagine what your life will look like under digital totalitarianism.

Your pay is direct-deposited into your bank account. You’ll pay for small purchases with your cellphone; if you owe a few bucks to a friend you’ll be able to bump your phone

;\ZXj_`Ó ZX$ k`fe nflc[ \jkXYc`j_ X ]fid f] Zfekifc jf i`^`[ `k nflc[ dXb\ ?`kc\i Xe[ JkXc`e cffb c`b\ jli]\i [l[\j% against your friend’s to settle up.

Nowadays, some corporations allow you to control when your bills get deducted; in the future they’ll demand that you authorize them to do it automatically. What if you have a disputed charge? They’ll already have your dollars, or work credits, or whatever they’ll call them. Good luck trying to get it back from the Indian call-center guy.

As corporate ownership becomes increasingly monopolized and intertwined, your overdue phone bill might be owned by the same outfit as your bank, which would simply take what it says you owe.

The law of unintended consequences is getting a serious workout thanks to digitalization.

Motorists in New York were thrilled when the EZPass system allowed them to breeze past lines at toll

bridges—at a discount, no less. Then divorce lawyers began subpoenaing EZPass records to prove that a spouse was cheating. Next police set up EZPass scanners on the bridges; if you pass two of them too fast, a speeding ticket is automatically generated. The next step is to eliminate cash lanes entirely; non-EZPass tag holders will soon have their license plates scanned and receive a bill by mail—plus a $2 to $3 “handling” fee.

Think there are too many fees now?

If you think you can’t trust banks now, imagine how badly they’ll gouge you when they control every single commercial transaction down to the purchase of a pack of gum. Angry about taxes? When tax agencies can take the money out of your account without asking, they will. Unlike cash, that phone bump to pay your friend will be a trackable, data mineable, fully taxable commercial transaction.

As if the post-2008 economic collapse hadn’t proven that no one is looking out for We the People but ourselves—and then barely so—the digivangelists tell us not to worry, that Big Brother, Inc. will smooth out the rough patches on the road to techno-fascist domination. From Wolman in Wired: “Opponents used to argue that killing cash would hurt low-income workers—for instance, by eliminating cash tips. But a modest increase in the minimum wage would offset that loss; government savings from not printing money could go toward lower taxes for employers.” Sure.

The same way banks passed on the savings they earned by replacing tellers with ATMs to their customers.

Americans are skipping into the digital inferno wearing a smile and relishing the smell of their own burning flesh. Countless friends and acquaintances pay all their bills online. “I’m all about using my checking account in place of cash and would love to be able to eliminate cash entirely from my life,” gushed PCWorld’s Tony Bradley recently.

Give Me Convenience or Give Me Death was the title of an album by the punk band Dead Kennedys.

We’ll get both.

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a couple of keystrokes. (We saw a preview of this when PayPal and Amazon shut down WikiLeaks’ donation mechanism and web server, respectively.) The high-tech hell depicted by the film Enemy of the State would become reality.

It is true that, in a society where every good and service has to be paid for with a debit or credit card, terrorist groups would find it much harder to operate. Don’t forget, however, that today’s terrorists often become tomorrow’s liberators. AntiBritish terrorists George Washington and Thomas Jefferson wouldn’t have stood a chance if the Brits had been able to intercept wire transfers from France.

Decashification would establish digital totalitarianism, a form of corporo-government control so rigid, thorough and all-encompassing that by comparison it would make Hitler and Stalin look like easygoing surfer dudes. The abolition of unregulated financial transactions would freeze the political configuration of the world, making it impossible for opposition movements—much less revolutionary ones—to challenge the status quo.

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No More Education Cuts

K

@E;<I>8IK<E k_ifl^_ Zfcc\^\ B$(- dXb\j lg knf f] k_\ kfg k_i\\ Yl[^\k ZXk\^fi`\j `e :Xc`]fie`X% K_\j\ knf ZXk\^fi`\j kf^\k_\i dXb\ lg e\Xicp ,, g\iZ\ek f] k_\ jkXk\ Yl[^\k% B$() \[lZXk`fe _Xj kXb\e X Y`^^\i g\iZ\ekX^\ _`k k_Xe Xep fk_\i Yl[^\k ZXk\^fip `e k_\ cXjk ]\n p\Xij% N\ Xi\ Xccfn`e^ fli \c\Zk\[ jkXk\ f]Ó Z`Xcj kf n`k_[iXn m`kXc jfliZ\j f] ]le[`e^ kf X m\ip `cc gXk`\ek% With these enormous budget cuts to K-12 we have seen districts increase class size, reduce the school year, lay off counselors, librarians, nurses, teachers and administrators.

California has been near last in 50 states in all these aforementioned areas for far too many years.

Therefore, my conclusion is we cannot cut K-12 education any more than we have already. No cuts. No cuts. No cuts.

As for other categories of the state budget, I am not sure. Reduction in employee salaries or pensions is a partial answer but can pan out to be shortsighted over time. As we cut salaries or other nonessential state positions. we increase the unemployment rate and lower tax revenue to the state. In a recent Sunday The New York Times editorial, headlined “The Looming Crisis in the States,” the author opines that “whatever there was to cut, states have slashed it, often at ruinous costs to the most vulnerable: the poor, the sick and disabled, students, tens of thousands of laid-off workers.”

For me our children deserve a better plan. If we cannot agree to come up with a funding plan that paves the way for a second-to-none educational system then we will never increase the high school graduation rate, significantly reduce the achievement gap and build a brighter future for our children and grandchildren.

The Times editorial said, “Ultimately, states are going to have to acknowledge that more effective,

targeted tax increases are inevitable, and can be achieved if they are structure properly. . . . States should not shy away from asking for more help from those most able to pay. . . . Experienced economists say it is better to raise taxes on the rich than to lay off workers and cut spending.”

I have always favored “sin” taxes as one source of revenue. Cigarettes should be $10 a pack, there should be a surcharge on every alcohol drink served in restaurants or sold in stores, perhaps 25 cents per drink and $1 per bottle of wine, six pack of beer, or bottle of spirits. Through these targeted taxes, we can raise billions in additional revenue for children’s schools. A win-win I think.

In 1916, the richest 1 percent of Americans held 5 percent of the nation’s wealth. Today the richest 1 percent hold 35 percent of the nation’s wealth, while 80 percent of Americans hold 16 percent of it. Justice Louis Brandeis said, “We can have concentrated wealth in the hands of a few or we can have a democracy, but we can’t have both.”

The best way for us to build a vibrant and healthy democracy is through quality public education.

Are we a generation bold and courageous enough to take on the challenge or will we continue to kick the can down the road as we continue to devolve as state and nation? —Joseph DiSalvo Joseph DiSalvo is president of the Santa Clara County Board of Education.

Eugenia Chien

Side Passages JG@E :P:C< G@E :P:C< Fe\ Fe\ f] k_\ _`^_c`^_kj f] )'(' nXj k_\ m`YiXek Jflk_ =`ijk Jki\\k ]\jk`mXc JlYQ<IF2 f] k_\ _`^_c`^_kj f] )'(' nXj k_\ m`YiXek Jflk_ =`ijk Jki\\k ]\jk`mXc JlYQ<IF2 g`Zkli\[ `j _ffg _\if IXZ_\c Dffi\%

@e n_`Z_ k_\ Xlk_fi cffbj YXZb fe k_\ Zi\Xk`m\ Xe[ gjpZ_`Z dXib\ij k_Xk nfm\ kf^\k_\i _`j \og\i`\eZ\j `e )'(' 9p GARY SINGH

F

FI J`c`Zfe 8cc\pj# k_\ ÓeXc jkX^\j f] )'(' ZXcc ]fi jfd\ p\Xi$ \e[`e^ i\Ô\Zk`fe% 8cc\pj Xi\ j`[\ gXjjX^\j ljlXccp jlYfi[`eXk\[ Yp jfZ`\kp kf k_\ Ç`e$Y\kn\\e%È K_\ Xcc\p [\e`q\e fZZlg`\j k_\ `ek\ijk`Z\j% ?\ fg\iXk\j Y\kn\\e k_\ ZiXZbjÆ ^\f^iXg_`ZXccp# Zi\Xk`m\cp Xe[ \m\e gjpZ_`ZXccp% He’s a sucker for anything that fogs the opposites of urban and suburban, native and exotic, luxury and the gutter, object and subject, academe and the street. As his friends throughout the rest of these pages recall highs and lows from the last 52

weeks, he will fondly do the same.

Since “Eden” usually means paradise, at least in crossword puzzles, the author felt heavenly during an unprecedented synchronicity of Edens. One day, he found himself reading Charles Sullivan’s Like Modern Edens: Winegrowing in Santa Clara Valley and Santa Cruz Mountains 1798–1981. Two days later, he stumbled across Timothy Leary’s legendary monolog on how the Garden of Eden constituted the first drug bust.

One more day later, at the mayor of San Jose’s State of the City address, a rabbi provided the words: “Our city is our Eden. . . . What we do today in San Jose began with Eden, as a charge to protect and to create, to see with open eyes and to dream.”

So the columnist wrote about how God sent the phylloxera epidemic to destroy all the vineyards in Santa Clara Valley and turn San Jose into

the Prune Capital of the World. The Grand Snarkitect of the Universe just doesn’t want San Jose to become famous for anything interesting.

In other columns, the anti-manabout-town journeyed across oceans.

While in Thailand, he penned a yarn about journalist Bob Tilley, whose pub, the Chiang Mai Writers Club and Wine Bar, functions as the unofficial wayward correspondent’s club. The author began the piece and then filed the column from the China Airlines Business-Class Lounge in Taiwan.

Europe also provided inspiration.

One column surfaced from the mystical fringes of the San Jose– Dublin sister-city relationship, while subsequent communiqués materialized in the Altstadt neighborhood of Düsseldorf and the Ramones Museum in Berlin. A trip back across the pond found the author in Edinburgh, where he immersed himself in haggis and Harry Potter.

On a trip to Edmonton, the same character found his northern muse at a Van Morrison gig and wrote a column from Room 410 at the Union Bank Inn. On that same sojourn, he witnessed 40 utility boxes painted with vivid murals, knowing such a groovy project

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SILICON SILICON ALLEYS ALLEYS

would never occur in San Jose. He then returned home with a common ailment known as “Post-travel I Hate San Jose Syndrome” and is still undergoing a mindfulness-based stress-reduction program.

Columns on the local front included musings on Josh Marcotte’s Lost San Jose photo exhibits, the annual Conspiracy Conference in Santa Clara, a Western esoteric traditions conference at the Rosicrucian Museum and forgotten record stores in San Jose—essentially, anything hidden or in-between.

There is a crack in everything.

That’s how the light gets in, as Leonard Cohen said.

In 2010, San Jose’s art scene came alive, and festivals combined highbrow with lowbrow in ways one would only see in Silicon Valley. The 01SJ Biennial evolved yet again, constantly redefining the interstices of digital culture, new media ecologies, art practice, computer music, performance, garage tinkering, wired hipsterism, dance, open-source theory and new environmentalism.

A month later, the Dalai Lama showed up. A propos of the situation, a process-oriented humor column explored the Buddhist concept of dependent origination, connecting several interdimensional cause-and-effect relationships within the author’s own personal spheres of awareness. One irritatingly literal reader didn’t get it, so she wrote in and complained, but such is life.

(Does anybody remember laughter?)

On the darker side of things, the Urban Blight Junkie relapsed again, this time at Hacienda Gardens, one of the most brutish examples of landlord neglect in San Jose history.

One week later, though, he found the right path to recovery, inspired

by Osho’s concept of Zorba the Buddha—perhaps an ideal example of transcending binary opposites through his art in order to improve his conditions. Stay tuned for more snarky reports from the in between.

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Cougar Attacks HP Exec HP CEO Mark Hurd faced sexualharassment allegations after he developed a crush on contractor Jodie Fisher. Though barely lurid by Julian Assange condom-ripping standards, the presence of feminist superlawyer Gloria Allred concerned HPâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s twitchy board.

An audit of his expenses unearthed some minor misreports, and Hurd was squeezed out and given a $40 million severance package. He hardly missed a beat, but HP did. The board wound up looking like a bunch of losers when Hurd landed on his feet at Oracle, and HP lost a quarter of the $40 billion in value that Hurd had created as CEO.

A

S THE ďŹ rst year of the millenniumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s second decade fades to a ďŹ nish, Silicon Valley basks in promotional glow. The green eyes of Facebookâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Mark Zuckerberg peer from airport newsstands everywhere. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Timeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Person of the Year, an honor previously bestowed on popes, kings and presidents.

MarketWatch declared Steve Jobs CEO of the Decade for turning Apple into the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s priciest tech company, an indisputable conclusion even if its editors overshot the decadeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s end by a year, like those pilots who blew past Minneapolis last year.

Apple stock now trades at more than 40 times its 2001 price. The typical Silicon Valley house, meantime, has grown in value by less than 1 percent a year. People continue to buy homes here, but more than a quarter of the purchases are from foreclosures. This begs the question of why, when our companies are the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s envy, shared prosperity escapes us. More than 10 percent are unemployed in Santa Clara County.

Post-9/11 visa hurdles make it harder for us to raid the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brain trust and our battered schools wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t crank out the kind of local engineering talent that gave us the iPod 10 years ago.

That device changed our paradigm, of course, which is why there are

ORACLE BEATS SAP SILLY

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The German enterprise software company SAP got caught stealing Oracleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s software. A subsidiary it was purchasing was found using its customersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; accounts to routinely download Oracle code. Oracle scored a $1.3 billion settlement in Novemberâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;estimated to be the equivalent of SAPâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s entire fourthquarter earnings. SAP will likely appeal the settlement or ask that the amount be lowered. Nevertheless,

they and everybody else learned a lesson. Never mess with Larry Ellisonâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;he will crush you and then go sailing.

Good Dad, Bad Cop An off-duty SJPD motorcycle cop became a national hero to parents of teenagersâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;as well as fans of rogue cops everywhereâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;by fake-arresting his 14-year-old daughterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s boyfriend.

After the â&#x20AC;&#x153;arrest,â&#x20AC;? actual misdemeanor charges were ďŹ led against both daughter and BF for unlawful sexual intercourse.

15

no longer Tower Records stores— and music clubs are few and far between. Clubs of a different type sprouted up this past year and will likely remain, unless government gets in the way or marijuana becomes downloadable, too.

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So, we’ve survived the Bush years, two burst economic bubbles and nuclear Korea. Computing speed is now measured in petaflops, while coffee has gone the other way, as the slow pour-over became the rage.

It is Metro’s custom, in this annual rite, to look at some of the events and notable nonevents that make up the 365 planetary revolutions that we call a year. Blessed with good weather in this part of an analog dirtball, our physical movements tracked by Google Latitude, we remain appreciative that our lives themselves haven’t been fully digitized yet. Otherwise, we’d feel like those screaming Japanese skydivers in the YouTube video, suspended from cables and watching the ground approach through the magic of Google Earth.

—Dan Pulcrano

The boy’s stepfather recorded the perp walk of the 15-year-old boyfriend on his cellphone and leaked it. Good viewing: “Not a good thing that the person you had sex with is a cop’s daughter . . . a cop’s daughter is not somebody you mess around with.

You’re stupid.”

At last word, the allegedly stupid minor and his parents are considering pressing charges against the allegedly

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NAILED IT Liquid Agency’s dramatic modernist facade in the SoFA District was honored with a Golden Nail award for renovation and beautification of a historic structure.

Creative director Alfredo Muccino thought they were talking about something else and painted his nails gold to commemorate the occasion.

When W Met Z What’s the quickest way to improve your image after receiving some bad publicity? Sit down next to George W. Bush and look clever by comparison. Which is exactly what Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg did after his unflattering portrayal in the film The Social Network The highlight from the pair’s conversation to plug Bush’s new book was the former president pontificating on how WikiLeaks has ruined Obama’s and America’s foreign-relations reputation.

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15 terrorist paste-filled crater, or at least a deeper terrorist paste-filled crater: their insane goat-slinging national sport, Buzkashi.”

Kicking a dead goat, to use Seanbaby’s parlance, may be cruel—but we know you’d do the same thing if it were us.

Single?

You Can’t Hold on to an iPhone

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smarter cop. The policeman’s lawyer, Terry Bowman tried to explain it away: “It is a shame if the young man’s parents lose sight of the importance of the message [i.e., don’t sleep with a cop’s daughter] because they have chosen to focus on what the girl’s father was wearing [a uniform].”

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THE WAVE BREAKS The idiosyncratic San Jose– based biweekly known as The Wave disappeared without an announcement in late summer.

Funded heavily by wealthy heirs to a technology fortune, The Wave competed with Metro by publishing a more Republican-friendly product.

What will we miss most about you, Wave? The Parade magazine–like headlines, the teal-plastic news racks? The ski-lodge trade-outs, the full-page breast-enhancement and cosmetic dentistry ads, the blow-byblow coverage of the film junkets?

Sample of some of writer Seanbaby’s burly W-era humor from 2002: “There is one Afghani thing everyone should see before their country becomes a smoldering

Apple engineer Gray Powell learned a hard lesson when he left a supersecret prototype of the nextgen iPhone in a bar in Redwood City. Apple’s security team jumped into action to recover the phone, but not before Gizmodo paid $5,000 to obtain the prototype and show the world what Apple was building.

Upon the phone’s official unveiling, customer reviews were mostly positive, but there was one not-sominor glitch: The device couldn’t make phone calls—at least not if it was held a certain way. Apple responded by summoning its inner-mom to scold phone owners, telling them they were doing it wrong. Eventually, a compromise was hatched: Apple provided a free casing, which alleviated most issues, and everyone agreed to forget the whole mess and go back to using Facetime for video phone sex.

I HEART COLMA Authorities were stunned in October to find two human hearts buried inside glass jars in a Bay Area cemetery. Both hearts contained embalming fluid and each had a different picture of an unknown couple attached. Several burnt cigars and candles were also found near the scene. Jon Read, police commander

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Paperwork Abduction Mark Smith walked into a Watsonville bank and allegedly demanded $2,000, and promised that if he didn’t get the money he’d detonate a bomb in his backpack.

Smith said he needed the money to pay a friend’s rent. The manager instead convinced Smith he should take out a loan and called police while bank staff distracted him with forms. Smith was arrested and no bomb was found. Perhaps the 59-year-old should consider himself lucky police arrived before he signed on for a subprime.

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for Colma, a small community by San Mateo, said the discovery might be related to the voodoolike religion Santeria. He reportedly added that whoever was responsible was “probably in possession of stolen property if you have a human organ like that.”

Apparently, Read has never been in love.

THE TOUCHYFEELY TSA The best thing to come out of intrusive airport security pat-downs had to be a guy saying, “If you touch my junk, I’ll have you arrested” to one of the screeners. The worst part, however, was the gaggle of “That’s the most play I’ve had in months” jokes that followed.

Mother Knows Worst Once embraced by the community after being severely injured in a bad car accident, Los Gatos mom Sara Cole got in hot water for getting way too close with the teenaged friend of one of her sons. In September, Cole was arrested on three felony counts of canoodling with a minor—a 17-year-old from Los Gatos High. The case against included Facebook postings and more than 5,000 “disturbing” text messages— disturbing sexually and, apparently, grammatically, according to newspaper reports: He sez: “hi. want to chil” She sez: “didn’t we just chil?”

He sez: “no, chil with me.” She sez: “oh you mean like come over and chil with you in your poolhouse? yea, baby, let’s go.”

THE TWEETING ROOM Get to know how long you’ll be suffering: this year Good Sam and Regional Med Center in San Jose both allowed the public to text its emergency room wait time, or to check the websites to see how long they’ll be reading a 10-year-old copy of Good Housekeeping and watching a Lifetime channel rerun with one eye. The next step is wi-fi in both ambulances (“Just broke my pelvis LOL!”) and the operating rooms so that surgeons can check

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FAKE STEVE JOBS NINJA ATTACKS Steve Jobs inherited a little undeserved street cred after a report circulating on the internet reported that the Apple CEO tried to smuggle some ninja stars onto his private jet at a Japanese airport. Apple called the story “pure fiction,” but that didn’t stop an animation

company from making a parody of the nonevent. In the video, Jobs is amazed to find he can’t take weapons on a plane, morphs into a black-clad ninja and attacks a security guard as though the guy just lost the prototype of the iPhone4 at a bar.

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Twitter (“Follow Friday #JackTheSnipper, #WhiteCoatHypertension, #MsSlicee49, #RustyHemostat”) and upload photos (“Shld this be turning blue??” “That’s gonna hurt in the morning!”)

We Got 99 Pot Clubs, but a Legal Operator Ain’t One When city officials told San Jose pot clubs they were operating illegally, the voices of a thousand local medical marijuana advocates rose up in unison to counter with: “Well, that’s just, like, your opinion, man!”

Unfortunately for them, it’s also the opinion of county and state narcotics agents, who apparently didn’t get the memo that even the president loves him some Prop. 215. Or the memo that 80 percent of San Jose voters approved the pot-tax plan.

The county raids on multiple dispensaries were just the latest chapter in a story that’s turned hazier than a Tuesday night burn cruise.

In March, the City Council punted rather than set up specific guidelines for medicinal marijuana clubs. Then they decided they had a chronic problem and told the clubs they couldn’t operate legally because there was no proper

zoning for them. Then they considered banning pot dispensaries altogether.

Then they voted down the ban and decided to tax the clubs instead. Then they admitted they have no clue what the hell they’re doing.

While the clubs’ legal status hangs in limbo with the city, higher authorities decided club operators were illegally making a profit off of their pot. To make matters worse, criminals have recently realized, “Hey, there’s marijuana in those marijuana dispensaries!” and proceeded to hit several clubs and even growers.

Downside: Countless sick people who rely on medical marijuana to ease their pain can no longer count on getting it safely nor legally.

WHY DO YOU THINK THEY CALL IT ‘ALTO’?

If the Stanford tuition doesn’t get you, the rents will. Real estate giant Coldwell Banker named Palo Alto the fourth-most-expensive real estate market in the nation, following La Jolla (“a nice place for old people and their parents,” as former area man Raymond Chandler put it), Beverly Hills and the Bush Dynasty’s royal stomping grounds of Greenwich, Conn. PA now averages at $1.4 million a home. Silver-

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Hey, Whereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s My Pension?

It was way back in August of 2009 when schools superintendent Charles Weis sent DA Dolores Carr a report saying heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d found â&#x20AC;&#x153;evidence of apparent illegal ďŹ scal practices and misappropriation of fundsâ&#x20AC;? at a charter school operated by the Mexican American Community Services Agency (MACSA). Immediately, reporters and others went to Xavier Campos, the former (longtime) COO of that agency, for comment. Campos, who was running for a City Council seat held by his sister Nora, responded by pursing his lips, arching his eyebrows, shrugging his shouldersâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and criticizing the questionersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; motives.

For the next 14 months, while the DA sat on her hands, the candidate clammed up. In October, when investigators ďŹ nally raided MACSAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s offices, Campos was again questioned, and again refused to speak. Instead he forwarded inquiries to his sisterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s spokesman.

Meanwhile, he refused to debate his opponent, Magdalena Carrasco, and declined to speak to reporters about his campaign.

On Nov. 3, he won.

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DEATH AND TAXES

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Š 2006-2010 Institute for Plastination.

Plastinnation. All rights reserved.

In April the feds launched their case against a Santa Clara man, Daniel Rigmaiden, on 74 counts of hacking, fraud and identity theft after a multi-year, multi-state investigation.

Rigmaiden (29) is alleged to have used sophisticated computer techniques to poach the identities of dead people to obtain fraudulent tax refunds.

Some 68K in ill-gotten returns were mailed to an address in Palo Alto. The mystery man who picked up the checks was traced to an apartment in Santa Clara. When all the indictments were totaled, the bogus tax claims exceeded $3 million. Rigmaiden is in federal custody awaiting trial; his alleged coconspirator, one aptly named Ransom Marion Carter III is still at large.

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Award Season Begins Join MC Brian Adams, Steve Wozniak, and VIP presenters in honoring the talents of community media makers. +"/6"3: Â&#x2026; Q N San Jose Repertory Theatre Buy tickets now at creaTVsj.org or call (408) 295-8815 Tickets include hosted wine and food reception

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lining it, Coldwell Banker suggested some affordable alternatives. At 1/10th of the cost of Palo Alto, how about Akron, Ohio? (â&#x20AC;&#x153;Won the All American City award three times and is the birthplace of the ice cream cone.â&#x20AC;?) Rubber City weather report as of this writing: 24 degrees, 17 tonight, snow expected.

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ROAD WARRIOR No need to get paranoid about strange-looking antenna atop a Google Prius. It’s not there to spy on your unprotected wireless network, but is rather an experiment in a self-driven automobile. Downside is that Silicon Valley traffic could get worse when cars learn to drive themselves. Good news is that the cars drive better than humans, especially ones who send text messages while driving.

Doh! Department, Collegiate Subdivision The think tank known as CampusReform.org unleashed the most startling revelation of 2010: After completing an “in-depth profile of the political climate of Stanford University,” the group uncovered “liberal political bias” on the campus.

The study estimates that liberal student groups at Stanford outnumber conservative groups 19 to eight (is that all?). “America’s colleges and universities are dominated by liberals, and Stanford University is no different,” according to Morton Blackwell, president of CampusReform.org. “Too often, the campus left uses its power to indoctrinate the next generation.” So, that explains why we are living in a socialist paradise with high marginal tax rates for the ultra-wealthy.

ACCEPT HIS ENDORSEMENT AT YOUR OWN RISK San Jose Mayor Chuck Reed’s spectacularly successful 2010 included a landslide re-election and a big win over bellicose public-employee unions on pension reform. But he continued to baffle his allies and potential allies with endorsements that made no sense.

In April, he endorsed Richard Calderon, who was running against the popular Sheriff Laurie Smith. A few days later, Democrat Reed threw his weight behind the embattled Republican DA, Dolores Carr. And in August, he gave his imprimatur, or what was left of it, to the extremist Larry Pegram, another Reep, who was running against the up-andcomer Donald Rocha. The good news (for most everyone but Chuck) is that in each case, the mayor’s candidate lost.

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Sharks Win Title, Bomb Out in Finals (Wait, That Happens Every Year) You have to hand it to the San Jose Sharks. At least they’re finding new ways to disappoint in the postseason.

After finally breaking through and beating Detroit to reach the Western Conference finals, the Sharks managed to get swept by the Chicago Blackhawks. A legion of fans, seduced into believing this was their year, were left to call for a ban on the goalie named Nabokov.

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WHACK A MOLE Controversy continued to dog the Independent Police Auditor this summer, when SJPD Sgt. Bobby Lopez claimed someone within the IPA’s office had leaked information about its inner workings to him. The

There are distant cousins, and then there are, you know, distant cousins.

When Robert Cortese entered the race for the District 9 seat on the San Jose City Council in March, his hopes were high. Sure, his main claim to fame was as “The Grand Wizard of Karaoke,” a minor celebrity on the circuit and a fixture at Japantown’s Bamboo 7. Still, Cortese must have been singing “Don’t Stop Believin’,” seeing as how he’s the second cousin of County Supervisor Dave Cortese.

Turns out he should have gone with “Livin’ on a Prayer,” as Cortese had already endorsed his former chief of staff, Don Rocha.

BUILD IT AND THEY WILL NOT COME Well-endowed Stanford boasts a beautiful new stadium, budgetconscious tickets ($12 for walk-ups), an 11-1 season of historic proportions, a Heisman runner-up not under a recruiting cloud—and they still can’t find enough fans to swing a tree at.

Indeed, attendance is down 2,000 from last year’s anemic showing.

Meanwhile, 113,411 fans in Michigan went to a football stadium to watch a . . . college hockey game.

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generation penned a new adventure for Robert Langdon, who infiltrates a secret society that is part Dilbert and part Indiana Jones’ Temple of Doom. The villain, based loosely on Zuckerberg, is said to flagellate himself with a corded mouse when he’s not ripping out the hearts of Indian programmers.

BATTLE OF THE BINARIES

Mark Zuckerberg spawned more talk about Facebook being a sinister techie cult this summer when it was revealed that the inner lining of a sweatshirt he was wearing featured an unusual seal resembling a pentagram. Unfortunately for conspiracy theorists, the sweatshirt proved to simply be company shwag promoting its 2010 strategy. The clamor did, however, spark Dan Brown into action, as the most popular writer of this illiterate

Cyberwar broke out in December following the arrest of WIkiLeaks founder Julian Assange on Swedish sex charges. Hackers sympathetic to the anti-secrecy activist launched distributed denial of service attacks on “enemies” of WIkiLeaks, including the websites of Mastercard, PayPal, Sara Palin, Amazon.com and the Swedish prosecutor’s office. The cyberattacks by “Anonymous” quickly drew a response from a patriotic hacker called The Jester, who clogged up WIkiLeaks’ servers. Even more ominously, files described as “Windows executable and debug binaries” hinted at a poison pill with even more damaging information that would be automatically released if anything happens to Assange.

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Don’t Take the Money—and Run A would-be robber was unclear on the concept at a Palo Alto 7Eleven this November. The suspect had a gun (check); the suspect demanded money (check). But when the clerk offered him the money, the suspect lost track of his to-do list. He grabbed an innocent bystander and again demanded money.

Again the clerk tried to give him money. The suspect finally left with nothing—not even a Slurpee.

Silence of the Demon Sheep Despite having a name that was almost a perfect anagram of “California,” despite having the cancer-fighting vote, despite bombing the airwaves with images of herself staring down voters like a starving red-tail eyeing a ground squirrel...despite this and that and the other thing, Carly Fiorina had to concede defeat, and was last seen melting and shrieking, “My beautiful wickedness!”

She had the money. She had the ornery electorate seeking the complete-absence of political experience. How did it happen? Was it the Demon Sheep “FCINO” viral

ad? Was it June’s live-camera slip, also known as “Hairgate?” (The unedited feed of this is a treat; Her Highness pecking at her Blackberry in mid conversation with aides, and deriding her employees for stuffing their faces with burgers the night before.) Was it Carly’s less than ringing website “FailedSenator.com”? Was it all or a part of the 50,000 employees she laid off, who neither forgave nor forgot?

WHEREABOUTS UNKNOWN After unceremoniously dumping Mark Hurd, HP tapped Léo Apotheker to be the new man in charge of the company that inflicted Carly Fiorina upon the dumbfounded voters of California.

Apotheker proved to be an elusive catch, since his previous position with SAP made him a subpoena target in Larry Ellison’s hissy-fit suit against the company for trade infringements.

Moving around the globe faster than Phileas Fogg, Apotheker managed to stay one step ahead of the process servers. Oracle went ahead and rested its case without Apotheker’s testimony—and walked away with more than a billion dollars in damages.

GOING GAGA As one could say of our soon-to-be First Female President: brilliant idiot or idiotic genius? Lady Gaga and her flame-throwing dog-juggler turned up with the Monster’s Ball tour Aug. 16 at HP Pavilion. She faced a crowd that at last had a more upscale place to wear their underwear on the outside than the “Rocky Horror Picture Show” midnight matinee.

Some Gaga words from 2010: “If you can’t get to know somebody, you shouldn’t be having sex with them.”

(Because the message you get from a Lady Gaga show is True Love Waits.)

“I have this weird thing that if I sleep with someone they’re going to take my creativity from me through my vagina.”

ESCAPE FROM MILPITAS Milpitas firemen had to extricate a woman stuck in the mud in Coyote Creek.

According to the fire department, another 45 minutes and the woman, an employee of the Santa Clara Valley Water District doing survey work, would have been in danger of drowning in the rising tide. The seven firefighters and four policemen on the scene all refrained from making the “What’s that giant sucking sound?” joke.

The Mark of Z Here’s a chance to see how the rich, famous and socially arrested live. The Palo Alto house occupied for the last couple of years by Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg (current whereabouts unknown) is on the market as a rental. The remodeled four-bed, three-bath property near Stanford is listed at an affordable (if you’re Mark Z.) $7,800 a month. Anyone who does move in might want to consider knocking down all the interior walls—that way the place would have the same amount of privacy as Facebook itself.

RATS ABANDON L.A. As if we didn’t have enough irritable, twitching, bulging eyed, photophobic mammals in the hightech industry, an 18-wheeler chock full of rats arrived in our valley from Los Angeles this November. In their defense, these were hundreds of celebrity rats, who had starred in an episode of A & E’s Hoarders, in which they infested (and ate half of ) some deranged unfortunate’s house.

The rodents got a new home at Andy’s Pet Shop, where they were tended by large-hearted and very unsqueamish volunteers. “There’s blues, minks, champagnes and

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MONEY: THAT’S WHAT I WANT

accused the labor, municipal and business coalition of overspending to the tune of $750,000. Though it claims to have restricted TSJ’s access to public money, it stopped short of invalidating the five-year contract it signed in 2007, even after finding the group failed to meet its targets.

Meanwhile, chief executive Dan Fenton, correctly reading the room, announced his resignation on Dec. 17.

Fields of Schemes

In November, Steve Jobs scored his ultimate coup—finally burying the apple of logo discord and making the full Beatles catalog available on iTunes.

Demand for digitized versions of the nearly-50-year-old pop hits of the mop-tops was so great that 450,000 albums and 2 million songs were download in a week’s time. In related news, Paul McCartney’s ex Heather Mills stepped forever to take the credit. “iTunes? I organized it all with Steve Jobs. But there’s no way I’m going back to court for more money. It was all settled at the time and that’s it,” Mills told the Daily Mail of Britain.

Because there’s no ‘bye’ in ‘team’

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Nearly everyone says Team San Jose has failed in its mission to generate significant interest in the local entertainment and convention industry. But for the record, that is not true. The group has brought tons of attention to Team San Jose itself. Grand juries certainly can’t get enough of them—for the second time in three years, a civil grand jury accused TSJ of financial mismanagement and slammed the city’s continued financial investment in the group.

Finally, the city announced that even though it still doesn’t don’t agree with the grand jury’s findings, they had independently discovered that Team San Jose can’t master basic math. Now officially frenemies with critics of the group, the city

June 9: the day Santa Clara voters indicated their willingness to go into great hock to build a football stadium for the ’Niners (who are currently 5 and 10) if they can only yoink them away from SF. In the meantime, a new election waits on the nebulous threat of Cisco Field in downtown San Jose—which already has a downtown baseball stadium, Municipal Park, home to the constant champs of the California league San Jose Giants.

There, only recently, you could have seen Tim Lincecum pitching and Buster Posey catching as well as the Smash for Cash and beers that didn’t cost a second mortgage on your house. The new stadium

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cinnamons,” exclaimed “Anna,” one ratophile on a Yahoo group devoted to caring for an animal that some would prefer to care for with a Victor trap and a dollop of peanut butter. Previously known for its landmark macaw neon sign on The Alameda, Andy’s (newly on Notre Dame) is now famous for its compassion.

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On Oct. 14 Sarah Palin and Michael Moore dueled for audiences in San Jose. During a hot Indian summer evening, two polarizing figures turned up to speak in San Jose. There was some turn out for the Scarlet Quitter’s inclusive message of fury, cognative dissonance and hot ursine love; noted professional Palinologist Geoffrey Dunn wrote, “She even managed to take a cheap shot at Michelle Obama and to insult the memory of San Jose’s Pat Tillman, the local football hero and NFL star who was killed by friendly fire in Afghanistan six years ago.” Moore, in town to receive the Steinbeck Award, told Metro: “The whole country is MILFed to death.”

location Cisco has in mind, pitched for 2015, may be more viable in the sense that there is public transit and foot traffic. It’s more possible than the earlier Fremont site, close to one of the most crowded traffic corridors in the solar system. If the A’s arrive, it’ll take much finessing from Major League Baseball. That is the question: are San Jose fans proGiants or what? After 2010’s season the answer is clearly not “what.”

Lawyered Up The murder case against Palo Alto

I I I I

hookah-joint owner Bulos Zumot for offing his girlfriend and torching their apartment in 2009 dragged on into 2010. After having been twice denied bail, Zumot unleashed his latest legal weapon: celebrity barrister Mark Geragos.

Famous for dropping infamous client Scott Peterson and being dropped by even-more-famous client Michael Jackson, Geragos petitioned one Judge Philip Pennypacker a third time to set bail. After that tactic failed, Geragos went moved to Plan B: impugning the integrity of police accelerant-sniffing dog Rosie.

The trial proper begins Jan. 3. Let the best dog win.

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PRONG-WAY STREETS Want to drive a cool car made in Silicon Valley, but can’t quite stomach the steep price of a Tesla? We have a solution: the brandspanking-new Prong, starting at $25,000. There’s one catch: it’s missing a wheel.

Prong creator Hong Quan of Santa Clara has built the ultimate tricycle for adults. It claims to combine the openness and maneuverability of a motorcycle with the comfort and stability of a car. The Prong recently received a big helping hand from car fanatic Jay Leno, who featured it on his website Jay Leno’s Garage.

Not just willing to look this gift iron horse in the mouth, the burghers of Palo Alto, Menlo Park, Atherton, Belmont and Burlingame want to kick the nag to the ground and thrash it soundly. The upscale town object to the notion of elevated tracks through their privileged environs and want to the rail authority to build tunnels for the bullet trains instead—adding a billion to the ultimate cost of the project. According to rumors, a Mr. K.C. Jones has been called in to mediate.

CHAMBER MADE

Vietnamese War Ends Madison Nguyen, the first Vietnamese American to serve on the San Jose City Council or in any other elected office in Northern California, finally beat back a bitter recall effort. Her opponents included Ly Tong, a rabid anti-communist activist who staged a hunger strike that brought national attention to the demand that an Eastside neighborhood be officially called “Little Saigon” instead of “Saigon Business District.” The issue made perfect sense to the recall activists and to nobody else. Nguyen

In the last throes of its stimulus splurge before donning the hair-suit of budgetary austerity, the feds have indicated their willingness to shovel $2.2 bill our way for construction of a high-speed railway to connect Northern and Southern California.

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defeated the recall easily.

In July, Ly Tong was arrested for attacking singer Dam Vinh Hung with pepper spray onstage at a concert in Santa Clara. Reason? “He’s a communist!”

The San Jose Chamber of Commerce rode the coattails of Mayor Chuck Reed’s popularity and scored a big victory for municipal fiscal responsibility with the passage of Measures V and W. The two ballot propositions put the city back in the driver’s seat by limiting the power of outside arbitrators and reducing pension benefits for new hires.

Chamber executives Pat Dando and Pat Sausedo, both former councilmembers, couldn’t capture a majority of the city council seats, however. The chamber failed to either endorse or distance

29 Democrats, which made for better theater, since Santa Clara County doesn’t have much of a Republican Party anyway. The Chavistas wound up handing a supervisor’s seat to the Republican Mike Wasserman by backing party loyalist Forrest Williams over moderate Democrat Teresa Alvarado. Its biggest victories were getting Xavier Campos on the San Jose City Council and his sister, Nora, into the California Assembly. The following are some notable highlights of the year.

Following the election, Chamber CEO Dando stepped down after six years.

Dando rebuilt the Chamber into a player, though not quite a match for the South Bay Labor Council’s political team, which is funded through the largess of foundations that contribute funds to labor-aligned Working Partnerships.

• At an SBLC meeting in March, Chavez attacked Democratic DA candidate Jeff Rosen, and pleaded for an endorsement of Republican Dolores Carr, claiming Rosen was a puppet controlled by former mayor Tom McEnery. Union board members and rank-and-file decined to endorse anyone.

What’s a License Among Friends?

In her pursuit of a coveted seat on the Monte Sereno City Council, Toni Gouveia Yamamoto decided that indiscretion was the better part of valor. Yamamoto got herself listed on the ballet as a Business Owner/CPA. Sounds good? Too bad it wasn’t exactly, precisely, remotely the truth. Yamamoto’s license to be a CPA was canceled six years ago and not renewed. Yamamoto blamed the problem on the people who didn’t raise the issue sooner.

UNION HARDBALL DEMOCRATS VS. DEMOCRATS During the 2010 election season, the South Bay Labor Council flexed its muscle, with mixed results. Under former Vice Mayor Cindy Chavez and her Working Partnership-funded political strategist, Bob Brownstein, SBLC went bare knuckle with its rival—mostly longtime local

• Later that month, egged on by SBLC, a statewide labor group put local Democratic consultant Jude Barry on its “do not patronize” list.

The laborites claim one of Barry’s companies took on an anti-union client. But locals believe the blacklisting is payback because Barry backed Democrat Teresa Alvarado over the SBLC candidate in the primary.

• In May, a series of SBLC flyers were sent out to District 5 voters branding San Jose-born-and-bred Democrat Magdalena Carrasco as an “outsider,” and a “Republican.”

• In July, Chavez tried (and failed) to spike labor and Democratic party endorsements of pro-labor Democratic Assemblymember Kevin De Leon—Carrasco’s exhusband—who rallied support for her campaign.

• In late October, with the Giants in the midst of the World Series—an SBLC flyer is mailed out criticizing Magdalena Carrasco for some longago tax difficulties and branding her a “Dodger,” a hit reminiscent of the scurrilous and racist attack on Tony West, now an Obama DOJ-er, in his 1998 race against Labor Temple– favored Manny Diaz.

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itself from ultraconservative anti-gay activist Larry Pegram, while Don Rocha sailed to victory. It blew its political capital in flip-flopping on Madison Nguyen, endorsing her tongue-tied opponent, Minh Duong, the year after it had gone all-out to keep Maddy from being recalled in a March 2009 special election. And the Chamber couldn’t deliver District 5 for its most viable candidate, Magdalena Carrasco, relying on the postal service to carry its message to a part of the city where community engagment gets voters to the polls on Election Day.

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In The Value of Nothing, author Raj Patel says that if all the costs associated with a Big Mac were properly added up and assessed at the cash register the true cost would be about $200.

“As an institution with a mission to return profits [McDonald’s] is keen to squeeze down what it pays for the things that go into making hamburgers, everything from beef to labor to rent to safety testing,” he writes. “The more it can drive down costs below those of its competitors, the more money it stands to make.

If McDonald’s is able to cause the emission of pollutants like CO2 without having to pay for it, the costs of the firm are not the same as the broader social cost.”

So what you’re getting with a so-called cheap burger is a heaping

side order of “externalities,” the term economists use to describe those costs passed on to society not accounted for at the checkout line.

When it comes to food, fast-food restaurants are the biggest culprits in the cult of cheap. That’s why it’s satisfying to see a restaurant like Palo Alto’s SliderBarCafe break from the pack and offer something different.

No, they don’t sell $200 burgers. In fact, they offer little hockeypuck-size burgers (is that where the term slider comes from?) that go for $2.79 to $4.99. What sets the restaurant apart is its choice of ingredients. Instead of lowest-common-denominator commodity meat, SliderBarCafe uses Niman Ranch beef and pork and Masami Farms Kobe-style beef.

The rest of the menu is enlightened, too. The coffee is organic, and the dairy products come from Clover Stornetta Farms, a local creamery. The soda pop (Boylan) is even enlightened, and made with cane sugar instead of high-fructose corn syrup.

Ashwani Dhawan, who owns

nearby Mantra, a high-end modern Indian restaurant, opened SliderBarCafe with the help of consulting chef Bruce Bowers. Bowers has created an appealing lineup of burgers that range from a traditional cheeseburger to a spiced lamb burger and an Indian-inspired veggie burger.

They’re small, so order two or three for a full meal.

The American classic slider ($2.99) hit all the right notes: juicy beef, fresh condiments and a soft but sturdy, toasted white bun. It’s pricier, but the Kobe-style beef slider ($4.29) is a good choice with its rich, beef taste and Parmesan cheese spread.

My two favorite sliders were the most nontraditional. The Mediterranean slider ($4.29) combines garlic-and-ginger-spiced ground Niman Ranch lamb with feta cheese, olives and artichokes on a multigrain bun with a mild garlic sauce. The vegetarian slider ($2.99) is a house-made patty of garbanzo beans, potatoes, sunflower seeds, onions, bell peppers and spinach on a multigrain bun. It’s quite good. The pulled-pork slider ($4.49) is a winner, too.

SliderBarCafe serves a healthier version of fries (regular, garlic and sweet potato) cooked with rice bran oil, a method that produced crispy and light fries with that side benefit of antioxidants.

SliderBarCafe opens early to serve breakfast sliders, i.e., English muffin, cage-free egg, bacon and cheese ($2.49), and it stays open until 10pm Sunday through Wednesday and until 11pm Thursday through Saturday, making the restaurant a great place to grab a few late-night burgers and a glass of wine or a beer. SliderBarCafe has a good list of wines by the glass and beer on tap.

Fast-food burgers are here to stay. But in a country that loves its burgers and the freedom of choice, SliderBarCafe offers a great alternative to the classic American meal that doesn’t come with such a hefty social cost on the side.

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Campbell ¿book online at campbell.net

CAPERS Well-heeled sports bar and restaurant. $$$. Capers is a sophisticated restaurant that uses sports as its theme. Welldevised menu full of inventive recipes and delicious finger foods. 11am-10:30pm Mon-Thu, 11am-midnight Fri-Sat and 9:30am-10:30pm Sun. 1710 W. Campbell Ave. 408.374.5777.

LA PIZZERIA Italian. $$.

La Pizzeria specializes in simple pizzas that stand on the strength of a few highquality ingredients, expertly prepared. Open for lunch and dinner daily. 11am-10pm Sun-Tue, 11am-11pm Wed, 11am-midnight Thu-Sat. 373 E. Campbell Ave. 408.370.0826.

NEGEEN Persian. $$. Mira ghasemi, grilled and puréed eggplant in a tomato sauce with scrambled eggs, and kashk-e-bademjan, puréed eggplant topped with mint and a creamy yogurt sauce, are great, as are the kebabs. Don’t miss the excellent Persian ice cream. 11:30am-10pm MonThu, 11:30am-midnight Fri-Sat and 11:30am-9pm Sun. 801 W. Hamilton Ave. 408.866.6400.

PSYCHO DONUTS Donuts. $.

Psycho Donuts has taken rings of fried dough into new territory with flavors like apricot, the Cookie Monster (topped with Oreos) and Do-Nilla (sprinkled with bits of vanilla wafers) and the intimidating Psycho Donut, a maelstrom of marshmallow, pretzel and chile powder. 6am5pm Mon-Thu, 6am-11pm Fri, 7am-11pm Sat, 7am-5pm Sun. 2006 S. Winchester Blvd #C. 408.378.4540.

RUSSIAN CAFÉ AND DELI Russian. $$. This is a small Russian grocery store with a

good little restaurant tucked in the corner. Borscht soup, pelmeni and solyankya sbornaya, a thick soup studded with chunks of mild pork sausage, black olives, pickles and barley all satisfy. 11am8pm daily. 1712 S. Winchester Blvd. 408.379.6680.

TIGELLERIA. Italian. $$.

Tigelleria’s menu centers on fine cheeses and Italian salumi paired with tigelle, free-flowing, piping-hot flat-breads the size of mini pitas. Lunch 11:30am2pm and dinner 5-10pm daily. 76 E. Campbell Ave. 408.884.3808.

TWIST CAFE AND BISTRO French and American. $$$.

Twist describes itself as “American food with a French twist,” but the menu includes Middle Eastern, Asian and Italian influences, too. Cafe 9am-3pm Tue-Sat, 9am2:30pm Sun; Bistro 5-9pm WedThu and 5-10pm Fri-Sat. 247 E. Campbell Ave. 408.374.8982.

Cupertino ¿book online at cupertino.com

ALEXANDER’S STEAKHOUSE AmericanAsian steakhouse. $$$$.

Alexander’s is much more than a steakhouse. Add a 500-bottle wine list, multiple dining rooms and Asian-accented ambience and you’ve got a standout South Bay restaurant. 5:30-10pm MonThu, 5:30-11pm Fri-Sat and 59pm Sun. 10330 N. Wolfe Road.

408.446.2222.

CAFE TORRE New Italian. $$$. A gem tucked away in an unassuming little mall, with a sophisticated interior and congenial hosts. Even better is the great pasta and seafood.

11:30am-2pm and 5-9:30pm Mon-Thu and 5-10:30pm FriSat. Closed Sun. 20343 Stevens Creek Blvd. 408.257.2383.

¿= book online $ = $10 $$ = $11-$15 $$$ = $16-$20 $$$$ = $21 and up Ranges based on average cost of dinner entree and salad, excluding alcoholic beverages

CUPERTINO BAKERY Indian and bakery. $. Don’t be fooled by the name. Cupertino Bakery is really a great South Indian restaurant. Unlike many South Indian restaurants, Cupertino Bakery isn’t vegetarian. Don’t miss the dosa and utthappam.

11:30am-9:30pm daily, but weekdays kitchen closes 2:305:30pm. 102521 S. De Anza Blvd.

408.517.9000.

GOCHI Japanese. $$$. Gochi is a globally inspired izakaya (small plates) restaurant. Most of the food is straight-up Japanese fare, but there are a few American, French and Korean twists. 19980 Homestead Rd. 408.725.0542.

Gilroy/ Morgan Hill ¿book online at gilroycalifornia.com

MAURIZIO’S AUTHENTIC ITALIAN RISTORANTE Italian. $$. You don’t dine here for a quick upscale fix, you dine here for down-home atmosphere.

Tender vitello saltimbocca tops the menu. 11:30am-2pm and 5-9pm Mon-Thu, 11:30am-2pm and 5-10pm Fri and 5-10pm Sat. Closed Sun. 25 E. First St, Morgan Hill. 408.782.7550.

RAGOOTS American. $$.

Ragoots offers a menu of recognizable favorites with a gourmet kick—salade niçoise with salmon instead of tuna; flatiron steak with blue-cheese herb butter; smoked salmon and prosciutto fettuccini. 11:30am9pm Tue-Sat.10am-2pm Sun. 17305 Monterey Rd, Morgan Hill.

408.201.9200.

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SVDINING 33

Milpitas ¿book online at milpitas.com

ABC SEAFOOD RESTAURANT Chinese. $$. ABC is a Hong Kong-style restaurant, and that means dim sum and lots of fresh, fancifully prepared seafood. At lunch the place is a traffic jam of dim sum carts proffering an assortment of little snacks 11am-2:30pm and 5-9:30pm daily. 768 Barber Lane. 408.435.8888.

BANANA LEAF Southeast Asian/Malaysian. $$$. A charming, exotic gem of a place with some of the best Southeast Asian food in the county. Sauces are masterfully crafted and reduced to glossy consistencies.

11am-3pm, 5-9:45pm Mon-Thu, 5-10:30pm Fri-Sat. 182 Ranch Dr. 408.719.9811.

CHILI GARDEN Szechuan. $$.

There’s a lot to recommend at this Szechuan standout.

Mapo tofu is a classic that rules here. For sheer fireworks, go for the Chongqing spicy chicken, a fearsome-looking dish of chicken lightly battered and crisp. 10:30am-2:30pm and 4:30-10pm Mon-Thu, 10:30am-2:30pm and 4:3010:30pm Fri-Sun. 210 Barber Lane. 408.526.9888.

SAVORY CHICKEN Filipino. $.

Savory Chicken offers a Filipino take on fried poultry. The chicken is tossed in a proprietary blend of herbs and spices and fried in soybean oil. No flour or bread crumbs are used. The result is an almost translucent skin that is so crisp it shatters on contact.

11am-8pm Tue-Sun. 1557 Landess Ave. 408.945.8616.

SOUTH LEGEND SICHUAN RESTAURANT Szechuan Chinese. $. The menu of this Milpitas standout reads like an encyclopedia of Szechuan food. Couple beef, kung pao chicken and Chen ma pa tofu are all great. 11am-2:30pm and 5-9:30pm Mon-Fri and 11am-9:30pm Sat-Sun. 1720 N. Milpitas Blvd. 408.934.3970.

SWAGAT Indian. $. Swagat explores both southern and northern Indian cuisine in its traditional and extensive

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menu. Buffet daily 11am-3pm, 5:30-10pm. 68 S. Abel St. 408.262.1128.

TIRUPATHI BHIMAS Indian. $$. Tirupathi Bhimas specializes in vegetarian food from south India, particularly that of Andra Pradesh, a spicy and aromatic cuisine, as well as a few north Indian dishes and “IndoChinese.” 11:30am-2pm and 6-9:30pm Tue-Thu, 11:30am2:30pm and 6-9:30pm Fri and Sat and 11:30am-2:30pm and 6-9:30pm Sun. 1208 S. Abel St. 408.945.1010.

Mountain View ¿book online at mountainview.net

AMBER INDIA Northern Indian, tandoori. $$. Meals unfold like a bolt of rare silk, served with care and efficiency in a rich, luminous interior.

Dishes are complex and varied.

11:30am-2:30pm Mon-Sun, 5-9:45pm Mon-Sun. 2290 El Camino Real. 650.968.7511.

BODRUM CAFE Turkish. $$.

The menu at Bodrum Cafe is extensive and covers a lot of ground, but it’s the lamb dishes that stand out. A good place to start is with the lahmacun (Turkey’s take on pizza) and the kebabs. 10am-10pm daily. 383 Castro St. 650.396.7010.

CASCAL Spanish Tapas. $$$.

The tapas menu yields big tastes in small portions at this panLatin charmer. Calamari, roasted quail and minted lamb meatballs are among the delicacies.

11:30am-10pm Mon-Sun. 400 Castro St. 650.940.9500.

MARU ICHI Japanese noodles. $. Maru Ichi is a true noodle shop. While there are a few appetizers on the menu, the slurpable house-made noodles—ramen, soba and udon—are what you want.

Go for the house specialty kuro ramen or the soy sauce ramen. Cash only. 11:30-2:15pm, 5-9:45pm, 11:30am-9:45pm, 11:30am-9pm Sun. 368 Castro St. 650.564.9931.

NETO CAFFE AND BAKERY CAFE $$. Neto Caffe and Bakery is a busy, good-looking space that has a happy buzz about it.

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The first thing you notice as you walk in is all the fresh pastries on the counter. There’s a little bit of everything including a number of Middle Eastern specialties. 7am-10pm daily. 135 Castro St. 650.625.9888.

PHO TO CHAU Vietnamese noodle house. $. The pho here is an honest noodle soup.

First-timers might want to stick with the basic pho chin, topped with slices of beef brisket. 11am-10pm daily. 853 Villa St. 650.961.8069.

THE SPICE ISLANDS CAFE Singaporean, Malaysian, Indonesian. $$. This restaurant will send your taste buds to the tropics. Talented chefs put out dishes full of spice and passion, like jumbo chile prawns, papaya salad and Malaysian spareribs.

The menu is expansive. 210 Hope St. 650.960.1888.

SUSHI TOMI Japanese. $$.

Sushi Tomi serves Japanese food with an elegant simplicity. Sushi and sashimi are ocean fresh. For a real treat, ask for an omakase dinner and let the chef put together a tasting menu for you.

11:30am-2pm 5:30-9:30pm. 635 W. Dana St. 650.968.3227.

XANH RESTAURANT Modern Vietnamese. $$. Xanh (pronounced “zahn”) epitomizes the new breed of upscale, contemporary Vietnamese restaurant. The appealing menu ranges from the traditional to the unconventional and includes rolls, salads, noodles, small plates and full-size entrees. 11:30am2pm and dinner 4:30pmclose Mon-Fri. 110 Castro St. 650.964.1888

Downtown San Jose ¿book online at sanjose.com

AMICI’S EAST COAST PIZZERIA Pizza. $. Amici’s specializes in thin-crust, New York-style pizza. With its upscale atmosphere and friendly service you’ve got one of downtown San Jose’s best pizza shops. 11am10pm Mon-Thu, 11am-11pm Fri, 11:30am-11pm Sat and 11:30am10pm Sun. 225 W. Santa Clara St. 408.289.9000.

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SVDINING Billy Berk’s restaurant looks and taste likes the offspring of the Hard Rock Cafe and Chili’s. The downtown San Jose restaurant offers a populist mix of American, Mexican and Asian food. Most dishes are designed for sharing—appetizer-size portions, nibbles and finger foods that pair well with the prodigious drink list. 11:30am10pm Mon-Wed, 11:30am-10pm Thu, 11:30am-11pm Fri, 5-11pm Sat, Bar open till midnight. 99 S. First St, San Jose. 408.292.4300.

CITY BAR AND GRILL CLASSIC American. $$$. Bigshouldered food in handsome surroundings is the rule. The steaks are big and juicy, the pot pies better than Grandma used to make. 300 Almaden Blvd, inside the Hilton. 408.947.4444.

E&O TRADING COMPANY Southeast Asian. $$$. Entrees come on playful serving dishes and are beautifully spiced with multiculti flavors, from Bali to Ceylon and back through Malaysia. Full bar.

Open 11:30am to 10:30pm, until midnight on weekends.

11:30am-10pm Mon-Thu, 11:30am-10:30pm Fri, 510:30pm Sat, 5-9pm Sun. 96 S. First St. 408.938.4100.

GUMBO JUMBO Cajun fusion. $$. Gumbo Jumbo charts new territory with dishes such as Cajun lemon-grass chicken, garlic shrimp noodles and crawfish egg rolls. And don’t miss the boiled crawfish.

11:30am-2:30pm and 5:3010pm Mon-Wed, 11:30am2:30pm and 5:30pm-midnight Thu-Fri, 3pm-midnight Sat and 3-10pm Sun. 80 N. Market St. 408.294.8626.

HOUSE OF SIAM Thai. $. This popular establishment runs the gamut of Thai treasures.

11:30am-2:30pm Mon-Fri, 5-10pm daily. 151 S. Second St. 408.295.3397.

LA PASTAIA Italian. $$. La Pastaia remains a stalwart of downtown San Jose’s dining scene. Set inside the Hotel De Anza, the rustic Italian restaurant has big city style to spare. Lunch 11am-3pm Mon-Fri and noon2pm Sat-Sun; dinner 5-9pm Mon-Thu, 5-10pm Fri-Sat and 5-9pm Sun. 233 W. Santa Clara St. 408.286.8686.

MOROCCO’S Moroccan. $$. Morocco’s is the kind of restaurant downtown San Jose needs more of: distinctive food cooked and served by people with a personal investment in customer happiness. Morocco’s personal touch is all over the restaurant. Lunch 11am-3pm Mon-Fri, dinner 5-11pm Mon-Sat and Sun 5-9pm. 86 N. Market St. 408.998.1509.

MORTON’S STEAKHOUSE Steakhouse. $$$$. Morton’s, a Chicago-based chain of restaurants with more than 80 locations across the United States and abroad, offers delicious, premium-priced steaks. 5:30-11pm Mon-Sat, 5-10pm Sun. 177 Park Ave. 408.947.7000.

MUCHOS Mexican. $. A small player with a big rotisserie, this taqueria cultivates a devout lunch following. All standards get billing, but the mesquiteroasted chicken is the star. 11am10pm daily. 72 E. Santa Clara St. 408.277.0333.

NAGLEE PARK GARAGE New American. $$. Lots of restaurants would like to think of themselves as friendly neighborhood joints but few deliver. The Garage does. Small but satisfying menu of well executed comfort food classics. 5-9:30pm Tue-Thu, 510pm Fri, 9am-1pm, 5-10pm Sat, 9am-1pm Sun. 505 E. San Carlos St. 408.286.1100.

PAGODA RESTAURANT Chinese. $$$. The cuisines of China share top billing with the opulence of the décor. Pagoda offers the gamut of regional all-stars. 6-10pm Tue-Sat. Fairmont Hotel, 170 S. Market St. 408.998.3937.

POOR HOUSE BISTRO New Orleans. $$. The Poor House Bistro offers a low-priced menu of Crescent City classics like po’ boys, barbecued shrimp, gumbo and muffaletta. Open 11am-9pm Mon-Sat. Open Sundays for major HP Pavilion events. 91 S. Autumn St. 408.292.5837.

SCOTT’S SEAFOOD Seafood. $$$. Culture lovers and power brokers alike find impeccable sourdough, a sea of marine treats and other entrees and a panoramic view (there’s a sister eatery in Palo Alto). For maximum pleasure, get there at sunset. 11:30am-5pm Mon-Fri,

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5pm-close Sat, 4:30pm-close Sun. 185 Park Ave. 408.971.1700.

71 SAINT PETER New American. $$$. This romantic eatery offers upscale Mediterranean food in an intimate setting. Closed Sun. 71 N. San Pedro St. 11:30am-1pm, 59pm Mon-Sat. 408.971.8523.

VEGETARIAN HOUSE Vegetarian. $. This meat-free stalwart offers vegetarian dishes from around the world with a side serving of religious reading material from spiritual leader Ching Hai. 11am-2pm, 5-9pm Mon-Fri, 11am-9pm Sat-Sun. 520 E. Santa Clara St. 408.292.3798.

San Jose ¿book online at sanjose.com

AMATO’S Sandwich shop. $.

The sandwiches make for greasy, sloppy, ferociously delicious eating. There are 34 varieties, categorized in three groups: hot, cold, specialty. Mon-Fri 10am-11pm, Sat 10am-9pm, Sun 10am-7pm. 1162 Saratoga Ave. 408.246.4007.

BILL’S CAFÉ Diner. $. Serving only breakfast and lunch, Bill’s knows its way around typical diner standbys—eggs (scrambles and hollandaiselaced “benedictions”), pancakes and expertly grilled sandwiches and burgers. 6:30am-3pm daily.

302 N. Bascom Ave (at Naglee).

408.287.2455.

CAO NGUYEN Vietnamese, Chinese-Vietnamese. $.

Gargantuan menu features nearly 200 Vietnamese menu options, including smoked duck, sautéed frogs and clay pot catfish. 10am-10pm Mon-Fri, 9am-10pm Sat-Sun. 2549 S. King Rd #A-16. 408.270.9610.

CASA VICKY Family-style Mexican. $. Nothing fancy, but a hearty brand of Mexican food wrought from popular family recipes. Breakfast plates and warm sweet pastries in abundant supply. 7am-7pm daily.

792 E. Julian St. 408.995.5488.

CASABLANCA’S CAFÉ Middle Eastern. $$. Casablanca’s Cafe is not going to win any awards for atmosphere or restaurant

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34 BILLY BERK’S Eclectic. $$.

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THE 62-DEGREE EGG AT BAUME Chef Bruno Chemel cooks the egg in a 62degree water bath for one hour and then lets it set for another four. The silken egg is then served with creamy pureed peas and a vermouth-scented foam that mimics the eggs whites. It’s fantastic. 201 S. California Ave., Palo Alto, 650.328.8899.

CHEESE RAVIOLI AT EVVIA I don’t think of pasta when I think of Greek food, but these cheese-filled ravioli are the real deal. The plump ravioli are filled with Manouri and feta cheese and the subtle bite of erbette, a bitter winter green.

What really sets the dish apart is the scattering of sliced artichoke hearts, fennel fronds, roasted red bell peppers, green onions, feta and Kalamata olives. 420 Emerson St., Palo Alto. 650.326.0983.

RAMEN AT ALEXANDER’S STEAKHOUSE Alexander’s Steakhouse is the place to drop a few c-notes on Kobe beef, but my favorite dish is chef Jeffrey Stout’s excellent ramen. Silicon Valley is a ramen lover’s paradise, and Stout offers a thoroughly respectable version that can hang with the best of them—pork belly, shiitake mushroom, a soft-cooked egg and firm noodles in a salty, rich broth. 10330 N. Wolfe Road, Cupertino. 408.446.2222.

CHINESE HAMBURGER AT CHINJIN EASTERN HOUSE This unremarkablelooking restaurant serves a remarkable little dish: the Chinese hamburger.

It’s a thin, wontonlike wrapper stretched over deliciously seasoned beef to form a rough patty shape. The disc is pan-fried on both sides to a crispy brown. Knife into it and out spill oniony, garlicky juices. It’s really good.

1530 S. De Anza Blvd., San Jose. 408.865.0302.

GRILLED OCTOPUS AT CHEZ TJ I love octopus, but too often it is served rubbery. Not here. The beautiful nubs of octopus are juicy and tender, and the smoky bits of char are a perfect match for the meaty cephalopod. The octopus shares the plate with an impossibly light and crisp little pillow of pan-crisped gnocchi, the silken deliciousness of bone marrow and the balancing acidity of sorrel leaves and stems. It’s a masterful plate of food in both execution and presentation. 938 Villa St., Mountain View. 650.964.7466.

‘WHICH CAME FIRST?’ AT FLEA STREET CAFÉ The “Which Came First?” chicken dish is a Flea Street classic: Fulton Valley pasture-raised chicken baked with green garlic, chunks of succulent pork belly, spinach and farro topped with a zinfandel beurre blanc sauce and a poached egg from owner Jesse Ziff Cool’s coop. It’s a messy, saucy dish that won me over with its homey deliciousness.

3607 Alameda de las Pulgas, Menlo Park. 650.854.1226.

DUNGENESS CRAB SALAD AT BISTRO ELAN Bistro Elan is an elegant restaurant; this simple dish of Dungeness crab salad with avocado, grapefruit and pistachios plays to the restaurant’s strengths: fresh ingredients expertly prepared. 448 S. California Ave., Palo Alto. 650.327.0284.

WHITE CORN SOUP AT MADERA You’ll have to wait until summer to enjoy this dish again but the soup is worth waiting for. The chilled Brentwood white-corn soup is summer in a bowl paired with a tomato-buttermilk mousse and bits of laughing-bird shrimp, a Caribbean farmed shrimp that’s raised in an ecologically sound manner. 2825 Sand Hill Road, Menlo Park. 650.561.1540.—Stett Holbrook

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CRAWDADDY Cajun. $$.

Crawdaddy specializes in boiled live crawfish flown in from Louisiana. The mud bugs are served steaming in a plastic bag swimming in a buttery, garliclaced sauce that ranges from mild to ridiculously hot. 3-10pm Mon-Fri and noon-10pm SatSun. 779 Story Rd. 408.286.2729.

DIA DE PESCA Mexican. $.

As you might guess from the name (Dia de Pesca means “gone fishing” in Spanish), the restaurant specializes in seafood—fish tacos, ceviche, shrimp cocktails and soups. It’s all good. 10:30am-8:30pm daily.

55 N. Bascom Ave. 408.287.3722.

DI LAC Vegetarian Asian. $$.

A bite of veggie heaven. The spacious Di Lac serves up an appetizing array of foods all of which are made fresh daily, including the soy milk and tofu.

9am-9pm daily. 1644 E. Capitol Expwy. 408.238.8686.

FLOWER FLOUR French bakery. $. Mimi Brown’s flower shop/bakery charms visitors with freshly made to-droolfor pastries, ready-to-go sandwiches and service with a smile. 8am-6pm Mon-Sat, 8am-4pm Sun. 896 Willow St. 408.279.0843.

HUKILAU Hawaiian. $$. Simple, slightly salty, stomach-filling foods with an Asian Pacific attitude. All daily specials come with a scoop of macaroni salad and steamed rice. Skip the quesadilla and nachos and head straight for the ahi poke.

With tropical drinks to match.

11am-1:45pm Tue-Fri, 5-9:30pm Tue-Wed, 5-10:30pm Thu-Sat, 11am-2:30pm Sat-Sun, 5-9pm.

230 Jackson St. 408.279.4888.

ISABELLA’S Peruvian. $$. One of the South Bay’s few outposts of Peruvian food, Isabella’s has much to recommend. Tacu-tacu, a starchy, beany blob enlivened with onions, garlic, oregano and other spices served with a thin steak, is great. Seafood

KRUNGTHAI Thai. $$.

Perennial Metro “Best Of” winner, Krungthai has been around since 1988, but still tastes fresh and new. 11am3pm and 5-10pm Mon-Fri and noon-10pm Sat-Sun. 640 S. Winchester Blvd. 408.260.8224.

LAYANG LAYANG Malaysian. $$. Layang Layang shines with clean, fresh flavors and ingredients and offers a great entry into Malaysian food.

Service is fast and friendly, a feat given how harried the waitstaff can be. Closed Mon. 1480 S. De Anza Blvd. 408.777.8897.

LE PAPILLON Contemporary French. $$$$. From start to finish, a meal at Le Papillon casts a spell on everyone who enters. The feeling is only broken when you walk out the door and abruptly step back into the real world outside. Lunch Thu and Fri, dinner nightly. 410 Saratoga Ave. 408.296.3730.

MY KHE QUAN HUE $.

Vietnamese. Food from central Vietnam is underrepresented in San Jose and that’s part of what makes this small restaurant such a find. The things to get here are the excellent noodle soups. 9am-9pm every day except Wed. Cash only. 960 Story Rd. 408.920.9603.

THE MYNT Indian. $. The Mynt’s lunch buffet is a Silicon Valley standout, while the sitdown dinner menu has plenty to offer as well. Lunch 11:30am2:30pm Mon-Sun, dinner 5:309:30pm Mon-Thu and 5:3010pm Fri-Sat. 5210 Prospect Rd. 408.973.9673.

PIZZA ANTICA UPTOWN Pizza. $$. The stony ovens of Pizza Antica turn out thincrusted designer pies with gourmet toppings in casual environs. Fine pasta and meat dishes also available. Open daily for lunch and dinner. 11:30am10pm Sun-Thu, 11:30am-11pm Fri-Sat. 334 Santana Row #1065. 408.557.8373.

PRESIDENT RESTAURANT Mongolian barbecue. $. This

mom-and-pop eatery gears itself toward the common man with the uncommonly large appetite. Thrown into the bargain is a Chinese steamtable buffet. 11am-3pm, 4:309pm daily. 1190 Hillsdale Ave. 408.978.7188.

RASA MALAYSIAN Malaysian. $$. Rasa Malaysian is a homey restaurant that offers a number of solid examples of Malaysian food including satay chicken, char tway keow and sambal kangkung. 11am-3pm and 5-9pm Mon-Fri and 11am9pm Sat. 1290 Coleman Ave. 408.980.0668.

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SILICON VA ALLEY’S

NewYear s Eve Guide Ê

REHOBOTH Ethiopian. $$.

Japantown isn’t all Japanese food. Rehoboth adds spice to the neighborhood with its diverse menu of Ethiopian standards.

Carnivores, vegetarians and vegans are all well taken care of. 11:30am-9pm Mon-Thu and 11:30am-10pm Fri-Sat. 665 N. Sixth St. 408.947.1717.

REYHAN $. Persian. Reyhan restaurant is located in the most unlikely of areas—an industrial strip of Almaden Road in south San Jose. As such, the place is kind of an oasis—an oasis of kebabs. 11am-8pm daily. 1625 Almaden Rd. 408.293.3600.

SIAM Thai. $$. Siam is a sweet little Thai restaurant between Valley Fair and Santana Row. The menu offers a lineup of Thai standards and crowd-pleasing combinations with Americanized names like “cashew lover,” “Thai angry” and “pleasing garlic.”

There’s plenty to recommend.

11:30am-2:30pm, 5-9pm TueSat. 10pm Fri. 2910 Stevens Creek Blvd. 408.246.0304.

SUSHI FACTORY Sushi bar/ Japanese. $$. It’s all here: sushi, bento box meals and teriyaki.

11:30am-9:15pm daily. 4632 Meridian Ave. 408.723.2598.

TLAQUEPAQUE NO. 3 Mexican. $. Willow Glen’s Tlaquepaque No. 3 occupies that sweet spot between a taqueria and a more formal sit-down restaurant. And then there are those highly gulpable chavelas. 7am-9pm Mon-Sat. 699 Curtner Ave. 408.448.1230.

YAS Persian. $$. In keeping with this ancient cuisine’s traditions, entrees are dressed up with the clean, fresh tastes of lemon and saffron, and desserts wear a distinctive hint of rose water.

11am-9pm daily. 1138 Saratoga Ave. 408.241.5115.

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design. But it should win awards for its falafel. In addition to wonderfully creamy hummus, tangy tahini sauce and pickled red cabbage, the falafel deluxe is gilded with strips of baked eggplant, fried cauliflower and fried potatoes. If you like it spicy, the ribbon of shatta (hot sauce) delivers a blast of chile pepper heat. 10am-9:30pm daily. 1185 Lincoln Ave. 408.993.8636.

dishes like the ceviche and cau-cau mariscos are also good. Don’t miss the delicious chicha morada, a Peruvian punch made with purple corn, pineapple and apple juice that’s boldly seasoned with cinnamon.

11am-10pm Mon-Thu, 11am11pm Fri-Sat and 2-8pm Sun. 700 S. Winchester Blvd.

408.248.PERU.

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CHOICES BY:

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EMERALD HILL Blank Club, San Jose Wed – 9pm; free

The Emerald Hill is a band that sounds like nothing this side of the 415 area code. Bands in San Jose usually stick to a guitar-bassdrums makeup, but the Emerald Hill’s willingness to work with whatever they can get their hands on has evolved into the sound that sets them apart. Their songs tell dark and descriptive fairy tales. “Kite Song” is front-porch folk, while “Dr. Appleseed” has a dirty stomp with a Silversteinian storyline. Luckily, not fitting into a mold is actually getting the Emerald Hill some notice. (JA)

WHITE ALBUM ENSEMBLE Rio Theatre, Santa Cruz Wed-Thu – 8pm; $25-$40 Perennial Santa Cruz favorite White Album Ensemble formed as an art project. Now the group can be found performing the Fab Four’s greatest hits on the regular.

This performance will feature the hits of 1966: tracks from Rubber Soul and Revolver, plus a few singles released that year. Think “Norwegian Wood,” “Eleanor Rigby,” “Yellow Submarine” and “Paperback Writer.” The original eight members will be joined by a string quartet and guests vocalist Drew Harrison, drummer Trey Sabatelli and percussionist Steven Robertson. Two-night engagement continues Thursday with live covers of Abbey Road and Let It Be, the final Beatles album. (TS)

*fri

Y&T

The Avalon, Santa Clara Fri – 8pm; $75 Metal dudes are supposed to act hard all the time, but don’t let the leather pants fool you—they’re big softies underneath. (Okay, not Lemmy. Him scare me.) So it’s no surprise to see Y&T pulling out all the stops for their mate Phil Kennemore at this New Year’s Eve benefit, especially since band leader Dave Meniketti has been playing next to him for over 35 years. Because Kennemore was diagnosed with metastatic cancer this summer, he’s been off the road while he does treatment at home.

The band’s had a fill-in, but they’re doing everything they can to aid his

recovery, including pulling in some big-name metal friends for this benefit, including Don Dokken, Geoff Tate from Queensryche and Bobby Blotzer of RATT. (SP)

JAY CHOU HP Pavilion, San Jose Fri – 9pm; $101-$301 He’s more famous than Mao. Yet, like those milkshake places advertising 55 flavors (where a lump of vanilla gets dunked with some exotic syrup), popular contemporary music in 2010 has a bland base of achybrakey vocals and clam-colored synthesizer, sauced with whatever sells in that quadrant of the world.

Thus “Chou Style,” the music of this megapopular Taiwanese pop star emulated by young hopefuls all over Asia. Just as the fiddle tips you off to the fact that you’re listening to Nashville instead of American Idol,

the erhu (Chinese violin) informs you off that you’re listening to Chou Style Easternpolitan. Like many a male diva, Chou sees his future in film: he’s playing the Bruce Lee role in the upcoming Green Hornet. (RvB)

UNAUTHORIZED ROLLLING STONES Fox Theatre, Redwood City Fri – 8pm; $75-$85 Watching the Rolling Stones perform nowadays is sort of like watching a neutered hound hump a couch: sure, they might have had it someday, but now it’s just a sad and somewhat alarming spectacle. Ace cover band the Unauthorized Rolling Stones seem to know this; they even boast in their press materials that “it’s even better than watching the real thing.”

And while that’s an admittedly low

* concerts DJ L Jan 1, Wet Nightclub, San Jose

UNAUTHORIZED ROLLING STONES

DANA EAGLE Jan 5 at 8pm, Rooster T. Feathers, Sunnyvale

LITTLE DRAGON Jan 6 at 9pm, the Pagoda Lounge at the Fairmont, San Jose

WINGROVE DANCE CO. Jan 6–9, the Stage, San Jose

DEAD SOULS Jan 7 at 9pm, Blank Club, San Jose

BAREFOOT NELLIES Jan 8 at 8pm, Sunnyvale Theatre

BIG SYPHE Jan 8, Wet Nightclub, San Jose

CREATV AWARDS Jan 8 at 6pm, San Jose Repertory Theatre

THE FLOYD PROJECT Jan 8 at 8pm, Visual and Performing Arts Center, De Anza College, Cupertino

OLIVE KITTERIDGE Jan 9 at 2:30pm, Dinkelspiel Auditorium, Stanford

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EMANUEL AX Jan 12 at 8pm, Dinkelspiel Auditorium, Stanford

SYMPHONY SILICON VALLEY bar, conjuring up the dirty grit and swagger of the Stones’ glory years is a much tougher trick, one that the Unauthorized Rolling Stones pull off with style. Even Grandpa Mick could learn a few moves from frontman Rudy Colombini. They headline this New Year’s Eve show with the Sun Kings. (PMD)

PREACHING TO THE ANIMALS Johnny V’s, San Jose Sat – 9pm; $5 Preaching to the Animals make quite a visual impression. At their shows they dress like preachers, neck collars and all. In a band of boys in uniforms, lead singer Rachelmae Havens stands out in her trademark dresses—she buys a new one for every show. The band delves into electric blues, hard

rock, rockabilly and even a hint of punk. Lead guitarist Josh Santaga and drummer Doug Doherty have been jamming together for the past two years, while Nate Fouts was the last addition, a friend of Doherty’s who rounded out the quartet. Perhaps their across-theboard style comes from their mix of influences. Havens is a huge fan of Glenn Danzig and the Gossip’s Beth Ditto. Santaga likes old ZZ Top, while Doherty names Iron Maiden and Missing Persons as top influences. (BD)

SAN FRANCISCO CHAMBER ORCHESTRA St. Mark’s Episcopal Church, Palo Alto Sat – 3pm; free Two young soloists—cellist Nathan Chan and bass player

Michel Taddei—appear with the San Francisco Chamber Orchestra for a New Year’s Day head-clearing concert of works

by Mozart (Symphony no. 1 and Symphony no. 40), Tchaikovsky and Jon Deak (Ugly Duckling). The Deak piece features lyric soprano Anja Strauss. The show is free, but advance tickets are required— see www.sfchamberorchestra.org for details on the performance.

(MSG)

CHILDREN OF THE INFORMATION AGE Homestead Lanes, San Jose Sat – 8pm; $8 At this point, lots of punk singers have turned to acoustic guitar, or at least tried for a solo career.

No Use For A Name’s Joey Cape,

7 Seconds’ Kevin Seconds and even Bad Religion’s Greg Graffin have all dipped their toes in the dangerous going-outside-ofpunk-and-running-the-riskof-alienating-our-fans pool.

Children of the Information Age describe themselves as folk rock/punk. They definitely have the folk edge; all acoustic instruments and storylike songs.

But I don’t hear much punk in the music at all—maybe in the lyrics, though. Of course, what I think is punk is different from what the next guy thinks and so on. Everyone wants to put what they think punk is in a little box while standing next to a huge vat of what they think punk isn’t. So get away from my box, because you don’t know what punk is, either. Opening are the Doormice, Ghosts in the Aqueducts and Yvette Young. (BD)

Jan 15 at 8pm and Jan 16 at 2:30pm, California Theatre, San Jose

MAKAHA SONS Jan 16 at 7:30pm, Carriage House, Montalvo Arts Center

MUSIC@MENLO WINTER SERIES Jan 16 at 4pm, Center for the Performing Arts at Menlo-Atherton

JOSHUA REDMAN SOLO Jan 19 at 7:30pm, Carriage House, Montalvo Arts Center

LANG LANG Jan 23 at 7:30pm, California Theatre, San Jose

BERRY SAKHAROF Jan 29 at 8pm, Memorial Auditorium, Stanford

LUIS MIGUEL Jan 30 at 8pm, HP Pavilion, San Jose

JEFF DUNHAM Feb 2 at 7:30pm, HP Pavilion, San Jose

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JAY AND THE PO BOYS Dec 31 at 7pm, Poor House Bistro, San Jose

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metroactive ARTS

More listings:

METROACTIVE.COM FEATURED LISTINGS

Striking 12 Wednesday, 7:30pm, Thursday, 8pm, Friday, 6 and 10pm; Lucie Stern Theatre, Palo Alto; $56–$75 The innovative pop ensemble GrooveLily remakes Hans Christian Andersen’s “The Little Match Girl” into a musical tale about a young woman with holiday spirit to burn when it is needed the most.

The show first popped up several years ago as part of TheatreWorks’ New Works Initiative and has become a holiday staple.

Celebrating Local Artists Runs through March; McKay Gallery, History Park, San Jose A new show at History Park in San Jose features some fascinating works about the valley by local artists, gathered in the collection of historian Leonard McKay. A good portion of the exhibit is devoted to the works of one of the region’s most prominent late-19th-century painters, ADM Cooper, who is represented by paintings and some rare sketchbook drawings. (Pictured is his turn-of-thelast-century 1905 sketchbook drawing Lone Sioux Camp in the Dakotas.)

*stage Theater STRIKING 12 A holiday musical by GrooveLily based on “The Little Match Girl.”

Presented by TheatreWorks.

Wed, 7:30pm, Thu, 8pm, Fri, 6 and 10pm. Thu Dec 31. $56-$75. Lucie Stern Theatre, Palo Alto.

Comedy BIG FAT YEAR-END KISS-OFF COMEDY SHOW An satirical round-up of politics in the last year, led by Will Durst and guests. Wed, 8pm. $25. San Jose Stage Company, San Jose.

COMEDYSPORTZ An interactive improvised comedy show. Fri, 9 and 11pm and Sat, 7 and 9pm. $12/$15.

ComedySportz, San Jose.

ROOSTER T. FEATHERS Wed, 8pm: Mahatma Moses

Comedy tour. $15. Thu, 8pm: Steve White with Andy Woodhull and Sammy Obeid. $12. Fri, 7:30 and 10:30pm: Steve White, Andy Woodhull and Sammy Obeid perform for New Year’s Eve; shows include party favors and champagne toast. $35 for 7:30pm show, $50 for 10:30pm show. Must prepay online for tickets. Sat, 9pm, Sun, 8pm: Steve White. $17. Sunnyvale.

SAN JOSE IMPROV Wed, 8pm: Black and Blue Comedy Show with Kris Tinkle. $12. Thu, 8pm: Bobby Lee. $20.

Fri, 7 and 10pm: new Year’s Eve show with Bobby Lee and two countdowns. Dinner packages available. Sat, 7 and 10pm, Sun, 7pm: Bobby Lee $20. San Jose.

*art OPENING

EUPHRAT MUSEUM “Learn to Play Too.” The group show about games and recreation is expanded in a second part. Jan 4-Feb 24.

Tue-Thu, 11am-3pm. De Anza College, Cupertino.

Museums CANTOR ARTS CENTER “Vodoun/Vodounon: Portraits of Initiates.” Portraits of Vodoun followers and their shrines in Benin by Jean-Dominque Burton. Thru Mar 20. “Go Figure!” Figurative paintings and sculptures by contemporary artists. Ongoing. “Collection Highlights From Europe 15001800, Ancient Greece and Rome.” Thru Dec 30. “Mami Wata: Arts for Water Spirits in Africa and Its Diasporas.” Thru Jan 2. “Chiaroscuro Woodcuts From 16th-Century Italy.” Thru Feb 27. Wed-Sun, 11am-5pm, Thu, 11am-8pm. Stanford.

HISTORY PARK SAN JOSE “Celebrating Local Artists: The Fifth Anniversary of the McKay Gallery. A look at the McKay’s collection, including paintings and sketches by ADM Cooper. Thru Mar 2011. In the Pasetta House.

“Explore San Jose Parks:Open to

the Public Since 1850.”Thru Jan 23. At Pacific Hotel Gallery. TueSun, 11am-5pm. San Jose.

JAPANESE AMERICAN MUSEUM “Camp Days: 1942-1945.” Works about the internment camps by Chizuko Judy Sugita de Queiroz.

Thru Apr 30. Also exhibits about the history of Japantown and the lives and contributions of Japanese immigrants in the valley.

Thu-Sun, noon-4pm. San Jose.

GALLERY SARATOGA

NORTH FIRST ARTSPACE

“Street Scenes.” Oil paintings

by Karina Svalya. Reception Jan 28, 6-8pm. Show runs Jan 3-Feb 6.Tue-Sun, 11am5pm. Big Basin Way, Saratoga.

An exhibit of works by artists from Triangle Gallery. Thru Dec 31. MonFri, 8am-6pm. San Jose.

CONTINUING “Fresh Produce.” With art from more than 30 participating artists from around the world.

Thru Jan 8. San Jose.

CAFFETRIESTE

“Bear in Mind: The Story of the California Grizzly.”Thru Feb 27.

Wed-Sun, noon-4pm. Los Gatos.

“Robot Girl.” Works by Christine Benjamin. Thru Jan 28. San Jose.

SAN JOSE MUSEUM OF ART

“The Way to San Jose.” An overview of transportation history in the valley, sponsored by Rotary Club of San Jose and History San Jose. Ongoing. San Jose.

SAN JOSE MUSEUM OF QUILTS AND TEXTILES “Cream of the Cloth: Quilts From the Marbaum Collection.” A rich sampling of contemporary quilts and fiber art. “Yvonne Porcella: Bold Strokes.” A 25-year survey.

Both shows run thru Jan 30.

Tue-Sun, 10am-5pm. San Jose.

TECH MUSEUM OF INNOVATION “Body Worlds Vital.” A detailed anatomical look at bodies in health and disease, based on the work of Gunther von Hagens.

Mon-Wed, 10am-5pm, Thu-Sun, 10am-8pm. San Jose.

TRITON MUSEUM OF ART “Heidi Brueckner.”Thru Feb 20.

“2010 Statewide Watercolor Competition/Exhibition.”Thru Feb 27. “Sweet Obsession.” Works

by Lynn Powers. Thru Feb 27. TueWed and Fri-Sun, 11am-5pm. Thu, 11am-9pm. Santa Clara.

Galleries OPENING GALLERY HOUSE “Small Works.” Jan 4-Feb 5. Tue, 11am-4pm, Wed-Sat, 11am-8pm, Sun 11am-3pm. Enter through Printer’s Ink Palo Alto.

Works in storefronts by Sean Sczepanik and Steven Sczepanik.

Along South First Street, San Jose.

ANNO DOMINI

LOS GATOS HISTORY MUSEUM

“Scaffolding + Sky.” A new installation by Denicia Gantner in skybridge. Ongoing. “The Modern Photographer: Observation and Intention.” A show of works from the first half of the 20th century drawn from the museum’s permanent collection. Thru Jul 3.

“Leo Villareal.”Thru Jan 9. “RetroTech.”Thru Feb 6. “Vital Signs: New Media From the Permanent Collection.”Thru Feb 6. “Degrees of Separation: Contemporary Photography From the Permanent Collection.”Thru Mar 14. Tue-Sun, 11am-5pm, closed Mon. San Jose.

PHANTOM GALLERIES

SAN JOSE INSTITUTE OF CONTEMPORARY ART “Old Technology.” A retrospective of painting, sculpture and installations by SJSU artist Tony May. Thru Feb 26. Tue-Fri, 10am5pm, Sat, noon-5pm. San Jose.

STANFORD ART SPACES DIRIDON STATION

Textile work by Alice Beasley, paintings by James Su and John Sundstrom. Thru Jan 20. Weekdays, 8:30am-5pm.

Stanford.

WORKS/SAN JOSE DOWNTOWN YOGA SHALA Works in clay by Paul Rubio.

Thru Jan 28. San Jose.

GALLERY SARATOGA “Farms, Vineyards and the Fruit of the Land.” Pastoral landscapes by Charlene Celio.

Thru Jan 2. Tue-Sun, 11am-5pm.

Big Basin Way, Saratoga.

GOOD KARMA VEGAN CAFE “SJSU Color 112: Exploring the Hyperreal.” An exhibit by photography students. Thru Jan 28. San Jose.

HIGHER FIRE CLAYSPACE & GALLERY “Geo Geometry.” Works by Doris Fischer-Colbre and Linda Mau. Thru Jan 1. San Jose.

KAVLI INSTITUTE FOR PARTICLE ASTROPHYSICS

“Ring in the New.” A member exhibit. Thru Jan 7. San Jose.

*events CHILDREN’S DISCOVERY MUSEUM NYE

A family event to ring in 2011.

Celebrate “Noon Year’s Eve” with a countdown to noon across nine time zones, including balloon drops. Fri, 10am-4pm. $10. San Jose.

CHRISTMAS IN THE PARK Vintage displays create a North Pole atmosphere in the South Bay. Thru Jan 1, 9am-midnight.

Plaza de Cesar Chavez, San Jose.

DOWNTOWN ICE

A display of 19 works, including the “Galactic Mysteries” series,

by Leah Lubin. SLAC National Accelerator Lab, Stanford.

The holiday season gets into full swing with an ice-skating rink downtown. Thru Jan 17.

Downtown San Jose on Market at San Fernando.

MACLA

FANTASY OF LIGHTS

“Hybrid Spaces: Family Origins & Collaborations.” Works by Las Hermanas Iglesias and Amy Diaz-Infante. Thru Jan 8. WedThu, noon-7pm, Fri-Sat, noon5pm. San Jose.

Vasona Park is transformed into an illuminated wonderland with thousands of colorful displays along a 1.5-mile driving route.

Runs thru Dec 31, 6-10pm. $10/$15 per vehicle. Vasona Lake County Park, Los Gatos.

METRO LOBBY “Edge of Nowhere.” A show by First St. Photo Collective. Thru Jan 28. San Jose.

MONTALVO ARTS CENTER “From Within, So Without” by Ali Maschke-Messing. Thru Jun 1.

“Sculpture on the Grounds: David Middlebrook.”Thru Jun 1. “The Oldest Living Things in the World.”

Photographs by Rachel Sussman.

Thru Jan 16. Saratoga.

NEW YEAR’S EVE ORGAN CONCERT James Welch performs selections by Bach and others.

Fri, 8pm. $10. St. Mark’s Episcopal Church, Palo Alto.

YOGA The studio opens with two days of free yoga classes. Sat-Sun, 8am9pm. Break Los Gatos (see www. breakelosgatos.com for details).

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NYE GUIDE party packages. In the club, DJs spin hip-hop and R&B. Fri. $25 admission; packages $109 and up.

399 S. First St, San Jose. 408.287.3991.

AVALON Y&T headlines a benefit for musician Phil Kennemore. Plus Geoff Tate (Queensryche), Don Dokken and more. Fri, 8pm-2am. $75. 777 Lawrence Expwy, Santa Clara. 408.241.0777.

AZÚCAR LATIN BISTRO Live video mixing and entertainment, a champagne toast and a balloon drop. Dressy attire. Fri. $15/$30. 71 & 81 E. San Fernando St, San Jose. 408.293.8482.

B4TWELVE DIGITAL NEW YEAR’S A “Roaring ’20s Countdown” party and casino night. Features hors d’oeuvres, midnight champagne toast, balloon drops and live video mixing. $35 and up. Fri, 9pm-2am. 412 Emerson St, Palo Alto. 650.326.7183.

THE BLANK CLUB DJ Basura hots an Alternative New Wave Disco Electro Dance Party with a champagne toast. Fri, 9pm. $10.

44 S. Almaden Ave, San Jose, 408.292.5265.

BLINKY’S CAN’T SAY Michael Osbourn plays.

Champagne glasses will be hosted at midnight.

Fri. 1031 Monroe St, Santa Clara. 408.985.7201.

BLOWFISH SUSHI A Black & White New Year’s Eve Party with DJ Jeff Morena. Fri, 10pm. 355 Santana Row, Ste. 1010, San Jose. 408.345.3848.

BOGART’S Karaoke and KJ Dennis. Fri. No cover.

1209 Wildwood Ave, Sunnyvale. 408.245.2800.

BOWLMOR LANES The bowling alley hosts a family-friendly party, 4-7pm; $29.95. For those 21 and older, experience four hours of unlimited bowling, a premium open bar and a buffet.

Fri, 9pm-1am. $85. Cupertino Square, 10123 N. Wolfe Road, Cupertino. 408.252.BOWL. BRITANNIA ARMS ALMADEN Cool Under Pressure. Dinner available with reservation. Fri. 5027 Almaden Expwy, San Jose. 408.266.0550.

BRITANNIA ARMS DOWNTOWN With

with a 7pm celebration at the Retro Dome and a midnight countdown downtown. Fri, 7 and 10pm. $20. The Retro Dome, 1694 Saratoga Ave, San Jose. Camera 3, 288 S. Second St, San Jose. 408.985.LAFF.

CREEKSIDE BAR & GRILL The Bravo Band and a special menu. Fri, first seating 5-7pm, second seating 7pm on. $60/$100. 544 Alma Ave, San Jose. 408.289.9781.

DIVE BAR Drink specials, party favors, champagne, dancing and more. Fri. No cover before 9pm; $10 after. 78 E. Santa Clara St, San Jose. 408.288.5252.

DOUBLETREE HOTEL A party at Club Max with music by Entourage. An overnight-stay package includes two tickets to the party and a glass of champagne in the 2050 Lounge & Bar. Call for prices and details.

Also, a four-course meal at Spencer’s for Steaks and Chops. 5-10pm. $58-$70. Fri, 8pm-2am. 2050 Gateway Place, San Jose.

408.453.4000.

FAHRENHEIT LOUNGE Hosted open bar, hors d’oeuvres, balloon drop and champagne toast. DJs Benofficial, Guinness, Crown D and Melvis Fri, 8pm-2am. $75-$100/$100-$125. 99 E. San Fernando St, San Jose. 408.998.9998.

FIREHOUSE GRILL AND BREWERY Saints and Sinners plus a four-course dinner, champagne toast and favors. Fri. Dinner 5-10pm. $10 cover; $39.95 dinner package. 111 S. Murphy Ave, Sunnyvale. 408.773.9500.

FOX THEATRE The Sun Kings and the Unauthorized Rolling Stones, five bars and a midnight champagne toast. Fri, 8pm. $75/$85; $50 sober ticket for nondrinkers. 2215 Broadway St, Redwood City. 650.FOX.7770.

FRIENDSHIP HALL ”A Momentous NYE Spectacular.” Music from Tortilla Soup, Showtyme and Pete Escovedo. Plus Mexican cuisine and party favors. Fri, 5pm. $80-$95; $150 per couple.

1121 E. Santa Clara St, San Jose. 408.828.3229.

music from 10 til 2. Fri. 173 W. Santa Clara St, San Jose, 408.278.1400.

GOOSETOWN LOUNGE A karaoke celebration.

Fri. 1172 Lincoln Ave, San Jose. 408.292.4835.

BRIX NIGHTCLUB A balloon drop, the Brix dancers and a champagne toast. Fri. $10 before 10pm; $20 after. 349 S. First St, San Jose. 408.947.1975.

GRAND DELL SALOON With a food and dessert buffet and live music. Fri, 7pm. $40; adv tix only. 1040 Dell Ave, Campbell. 408.378.3970.

CAPERS A live band, party favors and a

Chou. Plus Vincent Fang. Fri, 8pm. $101-$301.

525 W. Santa Clara St, San Jose. 800.745.3000.

balloon drop. Fri, 8pm. 1710 W. Campbell Ave, Campbell. 408.374.5777.

CARDIFF LOUNGE Open on the first day of 2011 for an all-day party. Fri, Jan 1, 6am. No cover.

260 E. Campbell Ave, Campbell. 408.374.7477.

CLUB FOX The Megatones and special guests the Cover Grrlz. $30. Fri. 8:30pm.

2209 Broadway, Redwood City. 650.369.7770.

COMEDYSPORTZ Laugh straight into 2011

HP PAVILION A night of Chinese R&B with Jay

ILLUSIONS SUPPER CLUB A singles dance party with champagne toast. Fri, 7:30pm-1am. $35-$200. 260 S. California Ave, Palo Alto.

650.321.6464.

IMPROV COMEDY CLUB Bobby Lee headlines two countdown shows. A dinner package with a champagne toast is available. Fri, 7 and 10pm. $20-$65. 62 S. Second St, 44 San Jose. 408.280.7475.

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y | D E C E M B E R 2 9 , 2 0 1 0 -J A N UA R Y 4 , 2 0 1 1 | SA N J O S E . C O M | M E T R OAC T I V E . C O M

AGENDA Agenda and the San Jose Hilton offer

43

M E T R OAC T I V E . C O M | SA N J O S E . C O M | D E C E M B E R 2 9 , 2 0 1 0 -J A N UA R Y 4 , 2 0 1 1 | M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

44

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NYE GUIDE 43 INDIA COMMUNITY CENTER A New Year Dhamaka, featuring Bollywood diva Pooja Batra. Fri, 8pm. $25-$100. 525 Los Coches St, Milpitas. 408.934.1130, ext. 239.

JOHNNY V’S Dub Massive and a PBR toast at midnight. Fri. 31 E. Santa Clara St, San Jose. 408.947.8470.

KAAMA LOUNGE “A Timeless Affair.”

Admission includes appetizers, two drink tickets, a champagne toast and party favors, plus music from DJ Asf. Fri, 7pm. $50/$75. 385 S. Winchester Blvd, San Jose. 408.243.4200.

LOS GATOS BREWING COMPANY A DJ, good food and a balloon drop. Fri. No cover. 130G N. Santa Cruz Ave, Los Gatos. 408.395.9929; and 163 W. Santa Clara St, San Jose. 408.292.9928.

MOTIF “All That Glitters Is Gold” at this endof-the-year blow-out celebration. DJs Dubb A, Jay Reese and ReSpin. $25/$30; additional $30 for dinner. Fri, 9:30pm-1:30am. 389 S. First St, San Jose. 408.279.1888.

MOUNTAIN CHARLEY’S DJ Roots plus a balloon drop and champagne toast. Fri, 8pm.

15 N. Santa Cruz Ave, Los Gatos. 408.295.8880.

MURPHY’S LAW Isis and the Cold Truth, party favors and a champagne toast. Fri. 135 S. Murphy Ave, Sunnyvale. 408.736.3822.

NETO’S MARKET & GRILL Live music from OTR, a four-course meal and a midnight toast.

Reservations suggested. Fri, 6:30pm-1am.

1313 Franklin St, Santa Clara. 408.296.0818.

9 LIVES Time and Pressure, FourWayFree and Silent Chaos. Fri, 6:30pm. $25 includes party favors. 7430 Monterey St, Gilroy. 408.337.1799.

NUMBER ONE BROADWAY Music from the Joint Chiefs, a balloon drop and party favors.

Fri, 8pm. $20. 102B S. Santa Cruz Ave, Los Gatos. 408.354.4303.

O’FLAHERTY’S IRISH PUB Celebrate Irish

dancing with live music from Jay & the Po Boys on the patio and Lara Price with Velvet Plum inside. Reservations required. Fri, 7pm-12:30am. $50. 91 S. Autumn St, San Jose. 408.292.5837.

ROOSTER T. FEATHERS Steve White, Andy Woodhull and Sammy Obeid perform. Fri, 7:30 and 10:30pm. $35 for 7:30pm show, $50 for 10:30pm show. Prepay online for tickets. 157 W. El Camino Real, Sunnyvale. 408.736.0921.

ROSIE MCCANN’S A live DJ, special dinner and champagne toast. Fri. 355 Santana Row #1060, San Jose. 408.247.1706.

THE SADDLE RACK Celebrate 2011 in Hollywood style with this “New Year’s Eve Party at the Oscars.” Fri, 7pm. $30/$45.

42011 Boscell Road, Fremont. 510.979.0477.

SENZALA A Touch of Brass plus Bossa Nova Trio and Samba Mundial. $70 ;includes dinner.

250 E. Java Dr, Sunnyvale. 408.734.1656.

SOUTH FIRST BILLIARDS A New Year’s Eve bash with DJs. Fri. 420 S. First St, San Jose. 408.294.7800.

STEPHENS GREEN DJ Cesar spins top hits.

Fri, 10pm-2am. 223 Castro St, Mountain View.

650.964.9151.

300 SAN JOSE Packages run $30 and up, with unlimited bowling, pizza buffet and party favors 4-7pm. For those 21 and up, packages start at $40 and include bowling, party favors and a champagne toast. Fri, 9pm-1am. 5420 Thornwood Dr, San Jose. 408.578.2940.

TEMPLE BAR AND LOUNGE So Timeless, plus live video mixing by DJ Ready Rock, food from MoGo BBQ, an open bar and more. Fri, 8pm. $40/$60. 52 S. First St, San Jose. 408.288.8518.

TESSORA’S BARRA DI VINO Featuring balloons, bubbles and dancing with Chrome Deluxe. Fri, 8:30pm. $15/$20. 1875 S. Bascom Ave, Ste. 560, Campbell. 408.626.7711.

TOON’S Favors, champagne toast and more.

Fri. 52 E. Santa Clara St, San Jose, 408.292.7464.

New Year at 4pm and West Coast New Year at midnight. Fri. No cover. 25 N. San Pedro St, San Jose. 408.947.8007.

VOODOO LOUNGE High on Fire headlines;

PEARL Billed as “a night you will never forget,” Pearl rings in 2011 with Evolution, featuring party favors, a midnight toast and more. Fri, 9pm2am. 8 S. First St, San Jose. 408.279.4444.

WET NIGHTCLUB Ring in the new year in high, ultralounge style. Fri, 10pm-2am. 396 S. First St, San Jose. 408.282.8938.

PEDRIZZETTI WINERY Black & White Bash, with music from White Pegasus, a buffet dinner and wine tasting. Fri, 8pm-12:30am. $65. 1645 San Pedro Ave, Morgan Hill. 408.779.7389.

PLAN B PUB Party the old year away. Fri. 115 Plaza Dr, Sunnyvale. 408.744.9800.

POOR HOUSE BISTRO Drinks, dinner and

Beerijuana opens. Fri, 8pm-1am. 14 S. Second St, San Jose. 408.286.VODO.

WINE AFFAIRS Three-course meals and wine or beer pairings; live music. Fri, 6 and 8pm dinner seatings with music from 9pm-midnight. $45$65. 1435 The Alameda, San Jose. 408.977.0111.

ZEN LOUNGE DJ Dynamic D. Plus GoGo’s BadAby and guests and complimentary hors d’oeuvres from 8-10pm and a midnight toast.

Fri, 7pm. $35. 251 Castro St, Mountain View.

650.969.4847.

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I present these figures for educational purposes only. They suggest, though, that if you went to see one of the Top 100 films, you had approximately a one-third chance of seeing something you’d seen before.

Heavy in 2010: the theme of uncertainty and descent into dream wonderlands; Alice herself (interpreted

by Tim Burton) is the subject of the No. 2 film of the year.

Often what was offered in 2010

wasn’t just escapism but absolute solipsism: that is, the denial that there really was such a thing as an outside world. “We’ll be living on the Internet,” enthuses Sean Parker in The Social Network, as if that weren’t just possible but desirable.

Leonardo DiCaprio, yesterday’s beloved romantic lead, is today’s confused dream weaver, with two roles as a widower who has left reality—first as a castaway in the Caligarian Shutter Island; second as the suave dream date in Inception.

“Wait, I’m confused. Whose subconscious are we going into?” asks Ariadne (Ellen Page). Inception’s labyrinth of dreams leads to an uncharted Tibetan-style bardo. It’s like the void in which a Tex Avery character ends up when chased off the film and into the empty white horizon of the screen.

Inception suggests that the ultimate human connections—between wife and husband, between father and son—are all just fantasies waiting to be gamed by engineers.

Even the grittier indie cinema kept us on shaky ground. The random-access drama Blue Valentine shuttles around in time between past and present. Blue Valentine asks, who is this couple: a pretty, hard-working student and her would-be boyfriend, a good-looking hipster—or a pair of ruined recession casualties living on the edge of town?

In scrambling up the time frame, Blue Valentine says, “Both at once.”

Even one of the most abjectly crowdpleasing films on my Top 10 list, True Grit, takes pleasure in aliases. It is one surprise to find more of the sound and sense of Shakespeare in The King’s Speech than in Julie Taymor’s adaptation of The Tempest. It is another to discover more of the heft of Shakespeare in this Western than there is in Taymor’s own island of fantasy, disguise and impersonation. The elaborate vocabulary of the searchers is one of True Grit’s main pleasures.

All the West’s a stage: Matt Damon’s Laboeuf is a buckskin-clad pose-striker

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metroactive FILM

and a declaimer. The Coens aren’t the first filmmakers to think of the West as a place of confidence men and noms de plains, well aware of the legends they’ll leave behind.

True Grit, however, is just one 2010 film raising the question of how one can disappear into a new life. Catfish and Exit Through the Gift Shop demonstrate how a false front can be slapped up fast.

The pose of the artist is the easiest to adopt and the hardest to expose—this would seem to be some of the text in the roundly overpraised Tiny Furniture, in which we note the elevated social status of out-and-out charlatans: the YouTube sensation who sits on his rocking horse and mangles Nietzsche; the sous chef who gets a name as an intellectual, not through the intelligent way in which he conducts himself but because of what he’s been rumored to be reading.

So, consider “Mr. Brain Wash,” the popular if egregious artist in Exit Through the Gift Shop. He may (it’s suspected) be a sock puppet of the courageous Banksy. But does “MBW” have to be Banksy? Who do you have to be to make bad art?

Such is the lesson in the documentary Catfish, when we learn the true identity behind a Facebook avatar, a pretty girl.

Supposedly, she’s a wizard of the lively and the plastic arts. (“Is there nothing you can’t do?” exclaims her victim.)

Pat Tillman’s afterlife, seen in the documentary The Tillman Story, shows how the State Department played identity games with a casualty of Afghanistan. Tillman’s bravery and intelligence could have made this country better. Instead, craven opportunists smelted him into a war monument.

Some thought of Toy Story 3 as sheer cuteness: a simply understood, funny adventure. But children watch it and face their terrors of abandonment.

Adults watch it and face their terrors of obsolescence, of being sent to a home when they age. On one hand, Toy Story 3 is a rousing adventure about slave labor and escape; on the other, it’s a metaphorical tale of caring parents who must be cared for themselves some day.

And then the year brought us the sumptuous I Am Love, with Tilda Swinton torn between the role of an unmarried lover or the respectable mother of a well-off family.

Because it’s the wrong medium, I can’t include on this list the electrifying

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metroactive FILM

New LITTLE FOCKERS (PG-13; 98 min.) See review on page 49.

MADE IN DAGENHAM (Unrated; 113 min.) See review on page 47.

Reviews 127 HOURS (R; 94 min.) 127 Hours is director Danny Boyleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s version of the true-

life story of climber Aron Ralston.

In spring 2003, Ralston was pinned under a half-ton boulder in a remote Utah canyon; what he did to survive became worldwide news. 127 Hours records an ordeal so singular, Poe couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t improve on it. Unfortunately, Boyle (Slumdog Millionaire) tries to blow up the storyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s elemental horror through pyrotechnics. He starts with a burst of relentless motion, as in his Trainspotting. Unfortunately, this ADD style has been thoroughly appropriated for sports-drink commercials. James Francoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s visceral acting in the service of this horror story probably should be praised,

even if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not a pleasure to watch.

One would have to be fairly simpleminded to think of this ghastly story as some kind of triumph of the human spirit. (RvB)

BLACK SWAN (R; 107 min.) Natalie Portman plays Nina, a dancer in New York with an overbearing stage mom, Erica (Barbara Hershey). The director of the ballet company, Thomas (Vincent Cassel), is exasperated by Ninaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s virginal approach to the dance. With the challenge comes worse news.

First, the arrival of a new young dancer, Lily (Mila Kunis). Second, the

THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER

Join us for a chance to receive a pass to see

during its theatrical run.

For your chance to receive a pass, good for two, join us at

(420 South First St. in San Jose) this Thursday, December 30 between 5:30pm-8:30pm!

While you're there, check out their art gallery, grab a drink & seek out your friendly Metro rep to find out how to get your pass!

For showtimes, advance tix and more, go to

cameracinemas.com

Best Theaters -- SJ Merc, Metro & Wave Readers All Shows Before 12 noon Now Only $5.00 Always Plenty of Free Validated Parking All Sites Seniors & Kids $6.75 / Students $7.50 â&#x20AC;˘ * = No Passes $7 b4 6pm M-F / 4pm S-S, Holidays â&#x20AC;˘ = Final Week â&#x20AC;˘ Pruneyard/Campbell 559-6900

= Presented in Sony 4K Digital (C7 â&#x20AC;˘only)

â&#x20AC;˘ Pruneyard/Campbell â&#x20AC;˘ 559-6900 Limited D-Box Seating Available!

TRON LEGACY 3D (PG) *TRUE GRIT (PG-13) *LITTLE FOCKERS (PG-13) *THE KINGâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SPEECH (R) BLACK SWAN (R) THE FIGHTER (R) HOW DO YOU KNOW (PG-13)

â&#x20AC;˘ 41 N. Santa Cruz â&#x20AC;˘ 395-0203 *LITTLE FOCKERS (PG-13)

Bring an item to donate to the Second Harvest Food Bank & you'll receive a special gift!

(PG-13; 115 min.) Shaped like the end of a trilogy (despite a proposed sequel), the new Narnia heads to its appointed port, loaded to the gunwales with a cargo of moral lessons. The elder Pevensies, Peter and Susan, are in America. Left behind are two younger children, Lucy (Georgie Henley) and Edmund (Skandar Keynes), who are billeted with their hateful cousin Eustace (Will Poulter). Inundated by an enchanted painting, Lucy, Edmund and Eustace end up bobbing in the sea right next to the Narnian navy vessel containing Prince Caspian

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* ( %&

jettisoning of the former diva, Beth (Winona Ryder). Trapped among rival, director and smothering mother, Nina starts to crack. Mirrors go bad, and she hears voices. Self-mutilation has been a part of director Darren Aronofskyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s work ever since Pi. Aronofsky prepares us for the torture from the beginning, when Nina cracks her toes in the morning, and they sound off like gunshots. In the rehearsal scenes, the camera spins around with the dancers, and we hear the scufďŹ ng of feet and the harsh panting of the dancers. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all hard, anguish-ridden work. When the music commences, Black Swan ďŹ nally feels like a great movie, simply because the Tchaikovsky would make us believe anything. (RvB)

No calls regarding this promotion will be taken by Metro or South First Billiards. One pass per person/household.

Donations will be accepted & passes handed out from 5:30pm-8:30pm on 12/30/10 only, while supplies last.

This film is rated PG-13. Run-of-engagement passes received through this promotion do not guarantee admission to the theatre. Seating is on a first come first served basis. Theatre is open to paying customers. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. Relativity Media, Metro Newspapers, South First Billiards, Second Harvest Food Bank, Terry Hines & Associates and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, winner is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. Not responsible for lost; delayed or misdirected entries. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors their employees & family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS!

OPENS IN THEATRES ON FRIDAY, JANUARY 7 Follow us on Facebook and Twitter! http://www.facebook.com/seasonofthewitch

â&#x20AC;˘ https://twitter.com/SOTWthemovie â&#x20AC;˘ http://www.facebook.com/43KIXNorCal â&#x20AC;˘ http://twitter.com/43KIXNorCal

FAIR GAME (PG-13) TANGLED (in 2D) (PG)

â&#x20AC;˘ 201 S. 2nd St, S.J. â&#x20AC;˘ 998-3300 Student Night Wednesdays -- $6 after 6pm *GULLIVERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S TRAVELS (PG) *LITTLE FOCKERS (PG-13) *TRUE GRIT (PG-13) TRON LEGACY (in 3D & 2D) (PG) THE FIGHTER (R) HOW DO YOU KNOW (PG-13) BLACK SWAN (R) THE TOURIST (PG-13) CHRONICLES OF NARNIA (in 2D) (PG) TANGLED (in 2D) (PG) YOGI BEAR (PG)

â&#x20AC;˘ 288 S. Second, S.J. â&#x20AC;˘ 998-3300 *MADE IN DAGENHAM (R) *TINY FURNITURE (NR) I LOVE YOU, PHILLIP MORRIS (R) OPENS 1/7! COUNTRY STRONG SEASON OF THE WITCH RED HILL

DISCOUNT (10 Admits/$60) / GIFT CARDS

THEATER RENTALS -- CALL 395-6465

Simon Mein

REVIEW

themselves to pose their legions of creatures under high-noon lighting, instead of disguising the ďŹ&#x201A;aws with half-shadows or twilight. (RvB)

THE FIGHTER (R; 114 min) David O. Russellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s boxing drama is juicy, touchingly acted and rich with atmosphere.

48

PETER TRAVERS

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;â&#x20AC;&#x2DC; TRUE GRITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; IS A NEW COEN BROTHERS CLASSIC.

GREAT FILMMAKING GREAT ACTING GREAT

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MOVIE.

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Educating Rita WITH ITS thin but shiny layer of nostalgia, Nigel Coleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Made in Dagenham makes strike-prone late1960s England appear more colorful than the dreary Northern California weather outside. (Even the projects look freshly painted.) The film is full of robust, even hammy theatrical performances, and a David Arnold soundtrack of less-obvious â&#x20AC;&#x2122;60s needle drops adds some spice: here, the Lemon Piperâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s silly â&#x20AC;&#x153;Green Tambourineâ&#x20AC;? sounds surprisingly muscular, like a lost track from The Who Sell Out. In 1968, at the huge Ford plant in Dagenham, London, a group of female seamstresses work on auto upholstery.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a job classified as unskilled labor, performed in a leaky garage without air-conditioning. A committee of women brings their grievances to two different union representatives: self less and soulful Bob Hoskins, and featherbedding Kenneth Cranham.

The upshot is a walkout, and the resulting bottleneck paralyzes the Ford plant. The matter arrives on the desk of Prime Minister Harold Wilsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s government: Labor Minister Barbara Castle (Miranda Richardson) sympathizes with the workersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; claims, despite the threats phoned in from Detroit (Danny Huston does the voice of the highest executive). Sally Hawkins (Happy Go Lucky) soulfully

underplays Rita, the worker and mom drafted to speak for the strikers. Her particularly unaffected humbleness sells a show-stopping speech about one of the characters that doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make it to the finish line.

If you like passing on the received idea that Daniel Mays is the next Michael Caine, observe how uncommonly well he DX[\ `e handles scenes you ;X^\e_Xd will really groan to see: the neglected husband R; 113 min. of the female crusader, Plays at Guild, having to make dinner Menlo Park; for the kids and opens Friday, Camera 3, burning it. They also San Jose serve who go without ironed shirts.

Pleasing to the occasional point of bonelessness, this bit of strayed history ends with interviews with the real Dagenham strikers. Director Cole (Calendar Girls) handles the cast and the subject matter with amiable humor but stints the darkness of the story.

But who can argue the filmâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s point?

What was made in Dagenham by these seamstresses is still useful for the rest of the world. When so much of our cinema is so cargo-crazed, one wants to defend a movie that quotes Karl Marx: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Social progress can be measured exactly by the social position of the fair sex.â&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Richard von Busack

M E TR O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y | D E C E M B E R 2 9, 2 0 1 0 -JJ A N UA R Y 4 , 2 0 1 1 | SA N J O S E . C O M | M E T R OAC O TIVE.COM

(Ben Barnes). Eventually, seven golden swords have to be rescued and placed on the altar of Aslan. The shipmates encounter one-legged giants, a green mist that envelops sacriďŹ cial humans and a dragonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s treasure hoard, which curses those who steal it. There are times when the Narnia movies are as good as CGI gets. The animators challenge

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48

metroactive FILM The story takes place in the 1990s, in Lowell, Mass. Road-crew laborer and striving boxer Micky Ward (Mark Wahlberg) has been training all his life with his elder half-sibling, Dicky Eklund (Christian Bale). Micky meets a weary bartender, Charlene (the creamy-skinned Amy Adams), a university dropout with some aspirations for a better life. Charlene is tough enough to fight off Ward’s overprotective family: a gaggle of seven high-haired, sharp-nailed sisters. The mom of this scary brood is the chain-smoking Alice (Melissa Leo in another fine, sandpapery performance); all put pressure on Micky to keep Dicky as his trainer.

One little problem: he’s a hopeless crack addict. The film has an excellent working-class subject: the problem of someone rising, anchored by a close family—anchored in the sense of the word that means

47

“something that drags you down.”

(RvB)

GULLIVER’S TRAVELS (PG; 93 min.) Whether one is a fan of his or not, most would agree that Jack Black is about as big as he ought to get. The computer effects to make Black vast in the desperately edited Gulliver’s Travels seem like wretched excess. Shipwrecked on the island of Lilliput, Black’s Gulliver meets a race of bite-sized foreigners who imprison him. Subplots include a bromance between Black and a Lilliputian (Jason Segel) with a crush of his own on the kingdom’s princess (Emily Blunt), as well as conflict with a jealous (and unfunny) general, played by Chris O’Dowd. Parts of the script are reasonably faithful to the book; nearly straight from Swift is a passage on the here-unnamed island of Brobdingnag. It’s the film’s

comedic highlight maybe because Black is temporarily cut down to size. By the time the directors haul out a giant robot, it’s clear that the most interesting part of this tale went missing. Swift’s satire on the stupidity of wars of religion is here just a vague anti-war message. The heavy product placement is shoved in by people blind to the implications of what happens when a cargobearing colossus arrives on a small island. (RvB)

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS (PG-13; 146 min.) A second Battle of Britain has broken out between the mortals and the wizards; the Hogwarts alumni (Rupert Grint, Emma Watson and Daniel Radcliffe) flee through a blitzed-out land.

Unfortunately, the single most flabbergasting part comes early on:

For your chance to see

SOUNDTRACK INCLUDES “COUNTRY STRONG” PERFORMED BY GWYNETH PALTROW

at a special advance screening, join us at South First Billiards Club & Lounge Tuesday, January 4th at 5PM! While you're there, find your Metro rep to see how to get your pass & win prizes from

Go to sofapool.com for more info on South First Billiards Club & Lounge.

South First Billiards is located at 420 South First Street in San Jose.

One pass per person/household.

MUSIC BY

SCREEN GEMS PRESENTS A MATERIAL PICTURES PRODUCTION “COUNTRY STRONG” SUPERVISIONMUSICBY RANDALL POSTER AND EXECUTIVE MICHAEL BROOK PRODUCER MEREDITH ZAMSKY PRODUCEDBY JENNO TOPPING & TOBEY MAGUIRE WRITTEN DIRECTED BY SHANA FESTE

This film is rated PG-13. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee admission and must be surrendered upon demand. Seating is on a first come, first served basis. EXCEPT FOR MEMBERS OF THE REVIEWING PRESS. No one will be admitted without a ticket or after the screening begins. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. Screen Gems, SJ Metro, Terry Hines and Associates, and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, winner is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. Not responsible for lost; delayed or misdirected entries. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS!

IN THEATERS EVERYWHERE JANUARY 7 www.CountryStrong-Movie.com

an armada on broomsticks breaking through the cloud ceiling, straight into a dogfight of death-eaters.

In the middle, the trio hides in the countryside amid blasted heaths and burned-out trailers, and things start to resemble Twilight before the film gets on its feet again. The startling Balinese-style puppet animation of the title’s fable is a highlight of the series. Grint, the clumsy/suave best pal Ron Weasley, seems to be growing into another Malcolm McDowell. Our beautiful Snape (Alan Rickman) towers over his evil cohort. Helena Bonham Carter is almost as nasty as Margaret Hamilton. (RvB)

HOW DO YOU KNOW (PG-13; 116 min.) Two men contend for the affections of Lisa (Reese Witherspoon), an ex–softball player. Matty (Owen Wilson) is a genial, promiscuous pitcher for the Washington Nationals. George (Paul Rudd) is too nice and too intimidated to pounce on Lisa.

Sedation sets in. How Do You Know is filmed by director James L. Brooks with little interest for the cityscapes of Washington, D.C. It’s staffed by easily recognized sitcom types who stay typed throughout the film. Brooks is trying to force these actors into the mold of some of his older stars, but Witherspoon is too seething to be Mary Tyler Moore, and Rudd doesn’t have the shrewdness of Albert Brooks. Using the same kind of rhythms, gags and teaching moments of ’70s network-TV comedy, director Brooks is trying to address recession misery. Lisa and George are without jobs and may not get hired again.

Unfortunately, as in his last film, Spanglish, Brooks has no handle on the way the lower class lives today.

(RvB)

THE KING’S SPEECH (R; 118 min.) Colin Firth gives a deeply affecting portrayal of a shame-wracked man born and bred to be a spokesman, yet who is handicapped with a crippling stammer. In the 1930s, the Duke of York is a family man with two daughters and a wife named Elizabeth (Helena Bonham Carter).

The stammering duke, known to his family as “Bertie,” is the official spare to the heir, next in line to the prince of Wales (a superlatively cast Guy Pearce embodies this Edward’s upper-class shadiness and monstrous entitlement).

Geoffrey Rush plays Lionel Logue, an Australian speech therapist tasked with helping the duke find his voice on the eve of England’s

entry into World War II. Most of film is an inspired actor’s duel about the conflict between pride and need. Rush’s wit and nimbleness counterpoint this story of majesty, which is almost exactly as tragic as it is comic. (RvB)

I LOVE YOU, PHILLIP MORRIS (R; 112 min.) Jim Carrey in the story of Steven Russell, a cop turned con-man whose downfall (or whose stairway to heaven) was his love affair with a fellow prisoner, Phillip Morris (Ewan McGregor). Even when the movie takes swipes at Texas justice and evangelicals, director/writers Glenn Ficarra and John Requa pussyfoot around the truth: their subject is a kind of sociopath. Despite Steven’s narration (untrustworthy, naturally) the film never gets bigger than a sum of its sometimes amusing incidents. Call it a het-up, sweet, essentially unsophisticated date movie. Carrey shticks like crazy; McGregor is blond and lamblike; the love scenes have no heat, no musk, no offhanded tenderness. Obviously, the directors were scared straight.

And the two leads dive into the trysts like swimmers leaping into a chilly water, shouting to mask the discomfort. (RvB)

TANGLED (PG; 92 min.) Directors Nathan Greno and Byron Howard stress the most resonant interpretation of the tale: Rapunzel as a myth for all parts of the world where girls aren’t allowed to run free. The imprisoning witch Gothel is a curvy villainess feeding on the youth and hopes of the girl whom she imprisons.

Remodeled as a Disney princess (voiced by Mandy Moore), this Rapunzel is freed by a rakish young thief. Third-act developments take the plot into a different resolution than the Brothers Grimm charted, adding to the surprise of the cartoon. You can see the influences and salute them as they pass: the antique charm of 3D Viewmaster fairy-tale slides, Romanian villages, Utah’s Canyonlands, the floating lanterns of the Japanese Obon festival; the block-headed yobs at the Snuggly Ducky tavern look as if they modeled for Britain’s Spitting Image. As for actual hero Maximus the horse, there hasn’t been such a hilarious steed since Chuck Jones died. (RvB)

THE TOURIST (PG-13) A thriller with Angelina Jolie and Johnn Depp, directed by the euphoniously named Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck.

Glen Wilson

(PG-13; 110 min.) Mattie Ross (Hailee Steinfeld), a self-assured 14-year-old, arrives in Fort Smith, Ark., in the early 1880s to track down Tom Cheney (Josh Brolin), the hired hand who murdered her father. The sheriff lists some U.S. marshals who could track him.

Mattie chooses Reuben â&#x20AC;&#x153;Roosterâ&#x20AC;?

Cogburn (Jeff Bridges): ruthless and dead to fear, if often dead to the world. Mattie offers the marshal a $50 reward to cross into the Choctaw lands to retrieve Cheney.

While waiting for his decision, Mattie encounters LaBoeuf (Matt

REVIEW

Damon), a fancy, buckskin-covered ranger who is seeking Cheney for a previous murder down in Texas. The three, reluctantly matched, draw closer to the killer but feud along the way. Bridges lulls us with his take on the part, doing things that John Wayne wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t capable of as an actor, expressing the desperate underside of a bluff, a rowdier level of buffoonery and a quitterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s despair. The Coen brothers have the bravery to deliver the downbeat coda to this story left out in 1969. It increases the stature of this ďŹ lm, its depth, beauty and sadness. (RvB)

more than any film in HISTORY WINNER!

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Humiliation Machine LIKE Meet the Parents and Meet the Fockers, the new Little Fockers is a machine for the degradation of Ben Stillerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Gaylord â&#x20AC;&#x153;Gregâ&#x20AC;? Focker. Soon after the beginning, Greg is sprayed with vomit by his exceedingly nasty 5-year-old son, Henry (Colin Baiocchi). Later, Jack Byrnes (Robert De Niro) forces Greg to drive a hypodermic needle into the older manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s courting tackle.

Greg has one possible avenue of escape: temptation by a pharmaceutical salesperson (Jessica Alba, who provides a strangely unstimulating underwear scene). Alba is surpassed in lewdness by the 67-year-old Danner, ďŹ&#x201A;ashing some lace as Dina, Gregâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s motherin-law; maybe Danner has more dignity because she C`kkc\ =fZb\ij has the least screen time?

The seriesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; undertone is clear: the anxieties of Jews dealing with pompous, privileged WASPS. The trilogy is about the contrast between stereotypes: a violently buttoned-down hierarchical family vs. sweaty, smothering huggers.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no wonder that Stiller seems more checked out of life here than he did in Greenberg, especially in the scenes with his wife, played by Teri Polo.

PG-13; 98 min.

There is one redeeming quality in Little Fockers.

Laura Dern plays Prudence, the head of some phenomenally expensive private kindergarten. Having really nothing to work with, Dern is still a familiar type: the all-wise and at the same time absolutely infantile child wrangler, dying with pleasure over every kidâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s twitch of the ďŹ nger.

His oďŹ&#x20AC;spring are the little obscenities referred to in the title: Henry and his somewhat cuter sister (Daisy Tahan). As it is the twinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ďŹ fth birthday, the Fockers are visited by grandparents Jack and Dina (Blythe Danner). Dustin HoďŹ&#x20AC;man and Barbra Streisand turn up as Gregâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sexcrazed parents, Roz and Bernie. Further humiliation arrives in the form of Pamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s old boyfriend, Kevin (Owen Wilson), a New Age trillionaire who is personal friends with Deepak Chopra.

Contrast this really resoundingly terrible sequel with the sometimes-OK Meet the Parents, and you see it plain: hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the trauma of 10 terrible years in American history; the red state/blue state struggle ending in a stalemate with torture and misery all around. Leering demon children are in the sidelines, waiting for the spoils.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Richard von Busack

M E TR O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y | D E C E M B E R 2 9, 2 0 1 0 -JJ A N UA R Y 4 , 2 0 1 1 | SA N J O S E . C O M | M E T R OAC T I V E . C O M

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metroactive MUSIC

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1. “DO YOU SWEAR TO TELL THE TRUTH, THE WHOLE TRUTH, AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH, SO HELP YOUR BLACK ASS?”—AMANDA PALMER: I wasn’t much of a Dresden Dolls fan, and I couldn’t care less about Palmer’s dramatic fallout with her record company. But I gotta say, this brutally frank take on her own life story really sold me on what fans of her songwriting have been saying all along—it’s smart and funny, a little sad on the surface, but ultimately mad

for life’s most indescribable pleasures. I heard her play it at Channel 92.3’s OK Go show at Expressions College, where she was opening, and downloaded it from her website that night. Everything just works—the title ripped from NWA’s “Fuck Tha Police,” the stark acoustic arrangement that emphasizes her storytelling, the brilliant qualityof-life-as-measured-by-quality-of-cake metaphor, and the weird sea shanty bridge: “Yes, I come here often . . . sure, I’ll have another one . . . but I don’t have to talk to you.”

2. “I’M GONNA CHANGE YOUR LIFE”— THERMALS: This year’s album, Personal Life, from the Sunnyvale expats (turned indie stars) didn’t get nearly the attention it deserved, and this song is its best track. No longer shackled to the punk-rock blueprint, the trio chugs through three minutes of big, heavy guitar rock while delivering their typically trippy take on a love song.

Sonically and thematically, it’s almost like an answer to the Breeders’ “Do You Love Me Now.”

3. “LOVE LUST”—KING CHARLES: I guess this guy hasn’t quite caught on over here, but now that Edward Sharpe has made it cool to be a total weirdo again, perhaps people are ready for the British version. So there’s no better time to consider this amazing blend of ’60s psychedelia and 21st-century electropop (technically released at the end of 2009). I’m not even sure what he’s on about half the time (“never let a woman go even when you know she can always be replaced”?), but I didn’t hear a more striking ending to any song this year than his gentle “love will set your soul on fire.”

4. “I THINK IT’S GETTING BETTER” (SEATTLE SESSION)—DAVE SMALLEN: This song from the Oakland singersongwriter’s album last year should have been a single, damn it, but the closest it came was when he released this slightly more aggressive version this spring with another outtake from a session in Seattle with Jason McGerr of Death Cab for Cutie. “I Think It’s Getting Better” isn’t exactly alt-country, but it is what alt-country ought to be: a catchy, shuffling tale of life and love, with a mean percussive kick. In that way, it’s not unlike the Old 97s when

they’re firing on all cylinders. Now that I think about it, Smallen does sound a bit like Rhett Miller, and I’ve never seen them in the same room.

5. “MIRACLE MILE”—KISSED HER LITTLE SISTER: I can safely say I’ve never heard anything like this mix of lo-fi indie rock, soul and hip hop. The group is really just Jeffrey Morisano, who apparently created the whole thing—along with the rest of his record High and Low—in his bedroom in L.A. It’s the only album this year to leave me speechless, and I’m sure it’s not for everyone. But anybody who appreciated Beck early on for his ability to cut through giant swaths of musical genres on his way to making a brand-new sound will dig this.

6. “INTERNET KILLED THE VIDEO STAR”— LIMOUSINES: Okay, if you live in the Bay Area and ever listen to the radio, you probably did hear this. I’ve written enough about it at this point—if somehow it’s escaped your attention thus far, just go listen to it already.

7. “KIDS”—SLEIGH BELLS: Again, if you listen to alt-radio around here, you may have caught this (or their other single, “Tell ’Em”). But seeing Sleigh Bells at Live 105’s Not So Silent Night pre-party was an eye-opener. Took me forever to decide if I liked it or hated it—sheets of metal guitar over hard dance-punk beats and gorgeous female vocals? It’s nuts, but it’s grown on me.

Plus, the noise attack is way toned down on record for extended listening possibilities. With Alexis Krauss’ delivery on this song, it’s not hard to see why M.I.A. signed them to her label.

8. “I HEART CALIFORNIA”—ADMIRAL RADLEY: I love a good California song, and with its creepy feel and lines like “drugs fall out of diaper bags while Midwesterners stare,” this new project from members of Earlimart and Grandaddy did the Golden State proud.

9. “BLOODLINES”—UGLY WINNER: Mixing the acoustic ambience of Calexico with a rock adrenaline rush, this tune is another South Bay export that deserves a wider audience.

10. “WHITE KNUCKLES”—OK GO: I’ve noticed even people who liked the band’s earlier releases didn’t necessarily catch on to this latest single from OK Go (even though it had a cool video filled with cute dogs! Dogs!). But this was for sure my favorite tune off the new record, with its brazen attempt to re-create everything that makes a great Prince song, right down to the treatment on the vocals.

metroactive MUSIC

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METROACTIVE.COM

New Year’s Eve Dance Party Friday, 9pm; Blank Club, San Jose; $10 House favorite DJ Basura plays alt-rock, new wave and electronic into the new year, with a free champagne toast at midnight.

Megatones Friday, 8:30pm; Club Fox, Redwood City; $30 After nearly two decades as a cover band, the Megatones got a boost when they won KFOX’s Last Band Standing competition. Their profile’s higher now, but their approach is the same— classic rock, a twist of fusion, and a lot of party shirts. (SP)

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Rock/Pop

CAPERS

MURPHY’S LAW

Fri-Sat, 8:30pm: Live music.

Campbell.

Fri: Isis and the Cold Truth.

Sunnyvale.

AVALON

CARAVAN

NETO’S

Thu-Sat: Live music. San Jose.

Fri, 8pm: Rock and R&B with OTR for NYE. Santa Clara

Fri, 8pm: Y&T, Geoff Tate, Don Dokken and more in benefit for Phil Kennemore. $75.

Santa Clara.

THE BLANK CLUB Wed, 9pm: The Emerald Hill, Honey Wilders, Brooke D. Free. Fri, 9pm: NYE dance party. $10. San Jose.

BLINKY’S CAN’T SAY Fri: Michael Osbourn for NYE. Santa Clara.

BOSWELL’S Wed: Jack Rip Off. Thu-Fri: Bitchin Camaros. Campbell.

BRITANNIA ARMS ALMADEN Thu, 10pm: After Party.

Fri: NYE with Cool Under Pressure. Sat: No music, but open regular hours. San Jose.

BRITANNIA ARMS DOWNTOWN Fri: 10 til 2. San Jose.

CARDIFF LOUNGE Sat: All day party for NYE survivors. Campbell.

9 LIVES

CLUB FOX

Fri, 6:30pm: NYE with Time and Pressure, FourWayFree and Silent Chaos. $25. Gilroy.

Fri, 8:30pm: Megatones, CoverGrrlz. $30. Redwood City.

NUMBER ONE BROADWAY

Fri: Saints and Sinners. $10.

Sunnyvale.

Wed, 9:30pm: JC Smith Jam Band. Thu, 9:30pm: Blind Pilots. Fri: Joint Chiefs. Los Gatos.

FOX THEATRE

QUARTER NOTE

Fri, 8pm: NYE with Sun Kings and Unauthorized Rolling Stones. $50 and up.

Redwood City.

Wed-Thu, 8:30pm: Pro jam. Fri: Scary Larry and the Monsters for NYE with midnight buffet. $20.

Sunnyvale.

FIREHOUSE BREWERY

TH E GRAPEVINE Thu, 7pm: Hootenanny! with Mike Murdock and Sean McGuire. San Jose.

HOMESTEAD LANES Fri, 8pm: Children of the Information Age, Doormice, Intergalactic Smugglers, Ghosts in the Aqueducts and Yvette Y. Cupertino.

JOHNNY V’S Fri: Dub Massive. Sat: Preaching to the Animals, Los High Tops, Will Crum. Sun: The Escorts, Abysmal. San Jose.

TEMPLE BAR AND LOUNGE Fri, 8pm: NYE party with So Timeless. $40/$60.

San Jose.

VOODOO LOUNGE Fri, 8:30pm: High on Fire. $20. San Jose.

WILLOW DEN Fri, 6:30-9:30pm: Friday Night Live. Willow Glen.

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1011 PACIFIC AVE. SANTA CRUZ 831-423-1336 -YPKH` +LJLTILY AGES 21+ New Year’s Eve! plus Special Guests Flor de Caña, Yabas Dance Co. Raizes do Brasil Capoeira, Marcio Peeter & Band Abaluar $15 Adv./$19 Drs. • Drs. 8 p.m. / Show 9 p.m.

Friday, December 31 In the Atrium AGES 21+

SAMBADÁ

FRIDAY NIGHT FUNCTION: NEW YEAR’S PARTY!

DJ Aspect, DJ Tone Sol, Nima Fadavi NO COVER • 9 p.m./ 9 p.m.

Saturday, Jan. 1 In the Atrium AGES 21+ THE SLACKERS plus Boss 51 $12/ $15 • 8:30/ 9 p.m.

Tuesday, January 4 In the Atrium AGES 21+

RASTA CRUZ REGGAE TUESDAYZ with DJs Don-ette & Lion-S + weekly guests DJs Models/Dancers NO COVER • Show 9 p.m.

Jan 7 Willie Nelson (Ages 21+) Jan 8 Vital SC: Diesel Boy (Ages 18+) Jan 8 Humboldt Squid Atrium (Ages 21+) Jan 14 Vital SC: Eliot Lipp (Ages 18+) Jan 15 The Jacka/ Husalah (Ages 16+) Jan 17 JFK of MSTRKRFT (Ages 18+) Jan 21 Vital SC: Datsik (Ages 18+) Jan 27 Boz Scaggs (Ages 21+) Jan 28 Railroad Earth (Ages 16+) Feb 5 Dead Kennedys (Ages 16+) Feb 6 Rob Zombie (Ages 16+) Feb 8 Badfish a Tribute to Sublime (Ages 16+) Feb 10 Trombone Shorty & Orleans Ave. Los Amigos Invisibles (Ages 21+) Feb 12 Ky-Mani Marley (Ages 16+) Feb 16 &17 STS9 (Ages 21+ & 16+) Feb 19 Y & T (Ages 21+) Feb 22 Less Than Jake (Ages 16+) Feb 23 B.B. King (Ages 21+) Unless otherwise noted, all shows are dance shows with limited seating.

Tickets subject to city tax & service charge by phone 866-384-3060 & online

www.catalystclub.com

metroactive MUSIC

World ALBERTO’S Wed: Bachata. Thu: Salsa with Pantea. Fri: Salsa. Sat: Sabados Latinoamericanos.

Sun-Mon: Argentine Tango.

Tue: Salsa with Pantea.

Mountain View.

ARYA GLOBAL CUISINE Fri-Sat, 8pm: Live music and belly dancing. Cupertino.

AZÚCAR LATIN BISTRO MOJITO BAR & LOUNGE Wed: Rock music. Thu: Latin fusion. Fri, 9pm: Special NYE party. Bachata and rock en espanol. Sat, 9pm: Salsa, merengue, cumbia, urban and Latin fusions. Tue: Salsa.

San Jose.

CASCAL Sat, 9pm: James Robinson flamenco guitar. Mountain View.

LILLY MAC’S Sun, 6pm: Traditional Irish music. Tue: Irish dancing.

Sunnyvale.

MOROCCO’S RESTAURANT Wed, 6pm-midnight: Flamenco. Fri, 6pm-midnight: NYE with belly dancer Adriana, plus live jazz. Sat, 6pm-midnight: World music.

Sun, 6pm: Moroccan music and belly dancing. Mon: French Music Night. San Jose.

PARRANDA NIGHTCLUB Thu-Sat: Live music.

Sunnyvale.

RISTORANTE FRATELLO Fri, 7pm: Claudio. Italian classic guitar and vocals. San Jose.

BOULEVARD TAVERN Fri: NYE with Billy James Blues Band. Los Gatos.

BRITANNIA ARMS CUPERTINO

CAFFE TRIESTE

WINE AFFAIRS

Fri: Closed for NYE. San Jose.

Wed: Chris Burkhardt. Thu: Lee Pardini Trio. San Jose.

D’VINE JAZZ AND WINE Fri-Sun: Closed for NYE. Morgan Hill.

FAIRMONT HOTEL Fri: Dinner plus Little Sister Band in Club Regent for NYE. $150. San Jose.

GRAND DELL SALOON Thu, 8pm: Blues jam with Aki. Fri: NYE party with favors, buffet, champagne toast and Mark Harvey Band. $40.

Campbell.

HEDLEY CLUB Fri, 8:30pm: Jack Conway Trio.

Hotel de Anza, San Jose.

J.J.’S BLUES CAFE Wed, 9pm: Suska. Thu, 9pm: Jimmy Dewrance. Fri: Nuthin’ but Trouble. San Jose.

LOFT BAR AND BISTRO Thu, 7-10pm: Live jazz. San Jose.

MANTRA Fri: Nora Maki and Band for NYE. $39/$59. Palo Alto.

MURPHY’S LAW Mon: Pro blues jam.

Sunnyvale.

PAGODA LOUNGE

Fri, 8pm: NYE show with Nigel and Clive and the British Invasion, plus Just Cream. All you can eat buffet and champagne toast. $85.

Redwood City.

Fri and Sun: Pro Jam with rock and blues local musicians. Santa Clara.

C&W/Folk BOSWELL’S Sun: Mike Leatherman.

Campbell.

MISSION CITY COFFEE ROASTING CO. Thu, 7pm: South Bay Folks open mic. Santa Clara.

THE SADDLE RACK Wed, 9pm: California Cowboys. Thu, 9pm: Diablo Road. Fri, 7pm: Hollywood at the Oscars NYE party. $30/$45. Fremont.

SAM’S BBQ Wed, 6pm: Matt and George ad Their Pleasant Valley Boys.

Tue, 6pm: Bean Creek. San Jose.

THREE FLAMES RESTAURANT Thu, 9pm: Live country music with Cowboy Larry. Willow Glen.

Open Mic

A PERFECT FINISH

Wed, 6:30pm: Open Mic. Tue, 7-11pm: Pro Jazz Jam. Redwood City.

POOR HOUSE BISTRO

ANGELICA’S BISTRO

WOODHAM’S LOUNGE

Fri: For NYE, dinner plus Wally’s Swing World. $55 and up. Inside Fairmont Hotel, San Jose.

Fri, 7:30pm: Capoeira show.

Sunnyvale.

Jazz/Blues

UNWINED Thu & Sat, 7pm: Live jazz.

San Jose.

SENZALA

Tue, 7:30pm. Irish music.

Mountain View.

Tue, 6pm: Modesto Briseno Septet. Willow Glen.

Sun, 5:30pm: Jazz Jam. Cupertino.

Fri: Blue House. San Jose.

STEPHENS GREEN

THREE FLAMES RESTAURANT

Wed, 6-9pm: Ron Thompson and friends. Thu, 6-9pm: Wendy Dewitt. Fri, 9pm: NYE, dinner plus music by Jay and the Po Boys and more.

Reservations required. $50.

San Jose.

SAN JOSE ATHLETIC CLUB

ANGELICA’S BISTRO

BAREFOOT COFFEE ROASTERS Wed, 7pm: Musical open mic.

Sign up by 5pm. Santa Clara.

BRITANNIA ARMS CUPERTINO Wed, 9:30pm: Open Mic Night. Cupertino.

Wed, 6pm: Rick Vandivier.

San Jose.

MISSION CITY COFFEE ROASTING CO.

TESSORA’S

Thu, 7pm: South Bay Folks Open Mic. Santa Clara.

Fri: NYE bash with Chrome Deluxe. $15. Campbell.

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metroactive MUSIC 53 MOUNTAIN CHARLEY’S Wed, 8-11pm: Live music, comedy and poetry. Los Gatos.

POOR HOUSE BISTRO Tue, 6pm: Open Mic Night.

San Jose.

RED ROCK COFFEE CO. Mon, 7pm: Cavin and King’s Open Mic. Mountain View.

THREE FLAMES RESTAURANT Wed, 8pm: Open Mic. Willow Glen.

Karaoke 7 BAMBOO Wed-Sat, 9pm: Karaoke. Tue, 9pm: Karaoke. San Jose.

BRITANNIA ARMS ALMADEN Wed and Sun, 10pm: DJ Hank.

San Jose.

BRITANNIA ARMS CUPERTINO Sun-Tue, 10pm: Karaoke.

Cupertino.

BRITANNIA ARMS SAN JOSE Wed, 9pm: August. Sun, 9pm: Karaoke. San Jose.

BRITISH BANKERS CLUB Mon, 9:30pm: Karaoke. Menlo Park.

Fri, 9pm: Joe. San Jose.

BENNIGAN’S GRILL

CREEKSIDE LOUNGE

DASILVA’S BRONCOS Wed: Guitar Hero Tournament plus karaoke. Thu, 9pm-1am: Karaoke. Santa Clara.

DIVE BAR Wed and Tue, 9:30pm: Karaoke. San Jose.

BLINKY’S CAN’T SAY

EFFIE’S RESTAURANT

BLUE BONNET BAR

Wed-Sat and Tue, 9pm2am, and last Sun of every month, 2-7pm: B&S Karaoke.

Campbell.

Wed-Thu and Mon, 8pm: Karaoke. No cover. Sunnyvale.

EL RANCHO SPORTS BAR

BLUE MAX

Thu, 8pm: Karaoke. San Jose.

Fri-Sat, 9pm-1:30am: Karaoke. Sunnyvale.

FAHRENHEIT ULTRA LOUNGE

BLUE PHEASANT

Tue, 9pm: Partyoke. Beer pong and karaoke. San Jose.

Tue, 7pm: Steve Tiger.

Cupertino.

BOGART’S LOUNGE Wed, Fri and Sun, 8pm-2am: Karaoke. Sunnyvale.

BOSWELL’S Tue: DJ Davey K. Campbell.

BRANHAM LOUNGE Thu and Mon: Karaoke. San Jose.

Wed-Sun, 9pm: August.

Milpitas.

HOMESTEAD LANES

HUDDLE

Thu, 10pm: Melissa and Heather. Santa Clara.

Sat, 9pm: August. Santa Clara.

Fri, 9pm-1am: Danielle. Santa Clara.

GOOSE LOONEY’S

C&J’S SPORTS BAR

Thu and Tue, 9pm-1am: Brian James. Palo Alto.

THE BEARS

Fri-Sun, 9:30pm-1:30am: Karaoke. Willow Glen.

Tue: Karaoke. San Jose.

DAN BROWN’S

Nightly except Sun, 9pm2am: Karaoke. San Jose.

THE GOOSETOWN LOUNGE

Fri, 9:30pm: Vinnie. Mon, 9pm: Vinnie. Tue, 9pm: August.

Cupertino.

BRIX

Wed and Mon-Tue: Stephanie.

Thu and Sat: Randy. Fri: Jerry Sauceda. San Jose.

ALEX’S 49ER INN

More listings:

METROACTIVE.COM

FIREHOUSE GRILL & BREWERY

Wed-Thu and Sun, 9pm: Wild Nights Karaoke. Fremont.

KATIE BLOOM’S Sun, 9:30pm-1:30am: Karaoke. Campbell.

KC BAR AND RESTAURANT Wed, 8pm: DJ Desmond. San Jose.

KHARTOUM Thu, 9pm: DJ Davey K. No cover. Campbell.

KING OF CLUBS Thu and Sun-Mon, 8:30pm: Bruce of KOR Karaoke. No cover. Mountain View.

LILLY MAC’S Fri: NYE with DJ Pagasus.

Sunnyvale.

MARIANI’S Thu, 8pm: Chris. Santa Clara.

NETO’S MARKET & GRILL Fri, 6:30-10:30pm: Bands with live karaoke. Santa Clara.

NORMANDY HOUSE LOUNGE Fri-Sat, 9:30pm: Karaoke.

Santa Clara.

NUMBER ONE BROADWAY

Sun, 7pm: Uncle Dougie Show. Palo Alto.

Thu: Singles party with DJ. Los Gatos.

FLAMES COFFEE SHOP

OASIS

Wed-Sat and Tue, 9pm: Uncle Dougie Show. No cover. San Jose.

Wed and Fri-Sat, 8:30pm: Doug. Sunnyvale.

GALAXY

Fri-Sat, 9pm-2am, and Sun, 7pm: Karaoke. Mountain View.

Thu, 9pm-2am: August.

Milpitas.

OFFICE BAR

PEACOCK LOUNGE Thu, 9pm: Brian. Sun, 9pm: DJ and karaoke. Tue, 9pm: Ryan.

Sunnyvale.

55

CONCERT

High on Fire SAN JOSE’S SLEEP set the bar for stoner rock with hallucinogenic doom metal so sludgy it sometimes outSabbathed Sabbath. Between their break-up New Year’s Eve in the ’90s and their brief, sold-out reunion gigs this year, the band became a legend. A key VooDoo Lounge in piece of Sleep lore had them melting the brains San Jose of record execs, who in 1995 refused to release their third album, Dopesmoker, because it was 8:30pm; $20. one hour-long song. Under the pressure of endless label blowback, the band split into Om and High on Fire. But the interesting thing is that HoF turned out to be a better band than Sleep—way hookier and even harder. If Slayer were to suddenly be banished to hell for their crimes against all that is holy (and, people, you know it’s coming), High on Fire would be the best metal band left standing.

Plus, it gives Matt Pike an excuse to take off his shirt—all the time.

They just got back from touring the world and soon they’re off to Australia for the Soundwave Festival. —Steve Palopoli

PIONEER SALOON

RUDY’S PUB

WILLOW DEN

Tue, 8:30pm: Acoustic karaoke with Sam Marshall.

Woodside.

Wed, 10pm-1:30am: Purple.

Palo Alto.

Wed, 9:30pm: Thomas. San Jose

POINCIANA LOUNGE

Tue, 10pm-close: Kamikaze Karaoke. San Jose.

Wed, 9:30pm: Wildside Entertainment. No cover.

Santa Clara.

QUARTER NOTE Tue, 9pm: Sherrie and Sue. No cover. Sunnyvale.

REDI ROOM

SAN JOSE BAR & GRILL

SHERWOOD INN Wed and Sat-Sun, 8:30pm: Chris. Thu-Fri, 8:30pm: Thomas. San Jose.

SHOOTERS BAR & GRILL

Thu, 9pm: Joseph. San Jose.

Thu, 9:30pm-1:30am: Karaoke. Sunnyvale.

ROSIE MCCANN’S

SOUTH FIRST BILLIARDS

Tue, 8:30-11:30pm: Karaoke.

No cover. Santana Row.

Sun: Karaoke. San Jose.

WOODHAM’S LOUNGE Wed-Thu, Sat-Sun, Tue: 9:30pm: Vinnie. Santa Clara.

Dance Clubs AGENDA Wed, 8pm: Salsa Wednesdays.

Fri: NYE party with DJS. $25.

Sun: Reggae. San Jose.

56

M E TR O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y | D E C E M B E R 2 9 , 2 0 1 0 -J A N UA R Y 4 , 2 0 1 1 | SA N J O S E . C O M | M E TR OAC T I V E . C O M

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56

metroactive MUSIC 55 AZÚCAR LATIN BISTRO MOJITO BAR & LOUNGE

More listings:

METROACTIVE.COM

C&J’S SPORTS BAR

MOTIF

Wed and Sat, 10pm: DJ in the Mix. Santa Clara.

Fri: All that Glitters Is Gold party with DJs Dubb A and Jay Reese. $25/$30. San Jose.

Wed: Rock music. Thu: Latin fusion. Fri, 9pm: Bachata and rock en espanol. Sat, 9pm: Salsa, merengue, cumbia, urban and Latin fusions. Tue: Salsa. San Jose.

CLUB ILLUSIONS

B4TWELVE

DASILVA’S BRONCOS

Wed, 7pm: House Party. Thu, 7pm: Throwback Thursdays.

Fri: Dance party with DJ Roots and champagne toast.

Los Gatos.

Fri: Special casino night and Roaring ’20s Countdown for NYE, with DJs Howhigh, Junbug and Droc. $35 and up.

Palo Alto.

Fri-Sat, 6pm: DJ or live band.

No cover. Santa Clara.

PARRANDA NIGHTCLUB

BLANK CLUB Fri, 9pm: New Wave dance party for NYE. $10. San Jose.

BLOWFISH SUSHI Wed-Thu and Sat: DJs and dancing. Fri: Black & White NYE party with DJ Jeff Morena. Santana Row.

BLUE PHEASANT Wed-Sun, Tue, 7pm: DJ and dancing. Fri: NYE package with dinner and DJ. $83.

Cupertino.

BRANHAM LOUNGE Wed: Humpday Wednesdays.

Thu: DJ. Fri: Ladies Night. Sat: DJ Jazzy and DJ Chaos. Hiphop and Top 40. Sun: Happy Hour All Day. Mon: DJ. Tue: $2 Tuesdays. San Jose.

Wed, 7:30pm: 3000 Samurai Diva’s Dance Crew, with Video DJ Jam and Moreno Effects Laster Light Show. $15/$20.

Fri: NYE with Julia M. Palo Alto.

DIVE BAR Thu, 9:30pm: DJ Otrebor. Fri: NYE party. Sun, 3-10pm: DJ Venom 347 and guest DJs. San Jose.

EL RANCHO SPORTS BAR Fri-Sat, 8pm: Old School Dance Party. San Jose.

FAHRENHEIT ULTRA LOUNGE Wed, 9pm: Wine Wednesday.

Thu, 9pm: DJs. Fri, 9pm: Party with DJ Benofficial, Guinness, Crown D and more. $75 and up. Sat, 9pm: Elite. Mon, 9pm: DJ. Tue: Partyoke. Beer pong and karaoke. San Jose.

FIBBAR MAGEES Wed: SIN. Fri: NYE celebration with DJ Menace. Sunnyvale.

GALAXY Mon: Ladies’ Night. No cover.

Milpitas.

GOOSE LOONEY’S

BRITANNIA ARMS CUPERTINO

PEACOCK LOUNGE Fri, 8pm: DJ Dancing featuring R&B, Top 40. Sat, 9pm: DJ Dancing featuring Chill, R&B, Top 40. Sun and Tue, 9pm: DJ and dancing.

Sunnyvale.

PEARL Fri: Evolution party. Sat: Hang Over. San Jose.

SABOR TAPAS BAR Sun: Reggae. San Jose.

SAN JOSE BAR & GRILL Thu: Thursday Night Live. FriSat: Video Killed the DJ with VJ Vinyl. Sun: Sinful Sundays.

Mon: Manic Mondaze. San Jose.

SOUTH FIRST BILLIARDS

THE GRAND DELL SALOON

STEPHENS GREEN

KATIE BLOOM’S

Wed and Sun, 10pm: DJ Hank.

Mon, 9pm: Beer Pong. San Jose.

Thu, 8pm: DJ Akustik. No cover. Fri, 8pm: DJ Mayo. Sat, 8pm: DJ Mayo and DJ Akustik.

Sun, 7pm: Latin Beat. Sun, 9pm: Sonidero Night. With local DJs spinning salsa, cumbia and more. Sunnyvale.

Thu: Ladies’ Night. Fri-Sat: Old School. Milpitas.

Tue, 9pm: Live DJ. Campbell

BRITANNIA ARMS ALMADEN

MOUNTAIN CHARLEY’S

Thu-Sat, 9:30pm-1:30am: DJs and dancing. Campbell.

KHARTOUM Wed: DJ Davey K. Campbell.

KING OF CLUBS Fri, 9:30pm: Club Brinca. Tue, 9pm: Nox. Mountain View.

Fri, 10pm: NYE fun with DJ. Fri: DJ Cesar. Mountain View.

TEMPLE BAR & LOUNGE Wed: The Pick Up. San Jose.

THREE FLAMES RESTAURANT Fri-Sat, 9pm: DJ Sir Dancealot. Willow Glen.

TOON’S

Thu: DJ David Q. San Jose.

Thu, 8:30-11:30pm: Naughty or Nice. With DJ Asif. $5. San Jose.

Fri: NYE party with favors, DJ music, champagne toast and balloon drop. Arrive before 10:30pm for a drink special.

San Jose.

BRITISH BANKERS CLUB

LOFT BAR AND BISTRO

WET

Thu, 10pm: DJ Tosh. Cupertino.

BRITANNIA ARMS DOWNTOWN

Fri: Russian-style NYE party.

Menlo Park.

BRIX Thu: Therapy. Fri: NYE party with balloon drop and dancers. Mon: Power Hour.

San Jose.

KAAMA LOUNGE

Fri-Sat, 10pm-1:30am: Live DJ, with special NYE party Fri. San Jose.

LOS GATOS BREWING COMPANY Fri: Dance party for NYE. Los Gatos and San Jose.

Fri: Ring in the New Year in style. Sat: DJ L. San Jose.

ZEN LOUNGE Fri: NYE Bash with DJ Dynamic D. Sat: DJ L. Mountain View.

57 M E T R OAC T I V E . C O M | SA N J O S E . C O M | D E C E M B E R 2 9 , 2 0 1 0 -J A N UA R Y 4 , 2 0 1 1 | M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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It’s a tough economy, and people are increasingly worried that they’ll be dining on Fancy Feast casserole at 80 (or 45). More than ever, men need to be wary of gold diggers. But, this guy had good intel that you aren’t one of them. The girl who suggests happy-hour drinks is not the girl who orders the lobster dinner—and then adds, “Oh, and can I get another one of those to go?”

He’s the one who chose to up the price tag of getting to know you. The reasonable assumption would be that he was inviting you, not you and your Visa card. Assuming he didn’t lose his

job between “Pick you up at 8?” and appetizers, he’s either a pathological cheapskate trying to pass himself off as Mr. Big Spender or is convinced that all women are out to milk ‘n’ bilk him.

Either way, a date with him seems like a twist on “L’Oreal—because you’re worth it.” His motto: “Don’t even think of incurring the $2 substitution fee for onion rings—because you’re not.”

The ironic thing is, even if you’d picked one of the pricier entrees, how much more would it have cost him . . . $10 plus tip? He ended up spending a whole bunch of money on a girl who now never wants to see him again—charming as some may find it when a guy mutters over the check, “Let’s see, you had that extra packet of ketchup—that’s probably two cents right there . . .”

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“You sucked the oxygen out of the room. Couldn’t you hear the sound of my brain cells dying?”

Shaking your fist at the sky because rejection doesn’t come in your preferred form won’t make it any less a rejection; it’ll just make you increasingly bitter, making you increasingly unattractive to women.

Understand that not getting a promised callback is a common sideeffect of modern dating—especially if it was a first date, especially if it originated on the Internet. When you’re just getting to know a woman, make dates cheap, short and local— drinks rather than dinner. Hope for the best, but until a woman’s getting into your car to go on date two, think of “I’d love to see you again” as an announcement akin to “I’m going to go home and give birth to a litter of squirrels.”

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TAURUS (April 20–May 20): In 1967, John McCain was a U.S. Navy pilot fighting in Vietnam. Shot down during a bombing mission, he was captured and jailed in the notorious Hanoi Hilton prison camp, where he was tortured. After being freed in 1973, he returned to the U.S. and eventually launched a political career.

When he ran for president in 2008, his candidacy got an endorsement from an unlikely source: Tran Trong Duyet, the Vietnamese prison commander who had supervised his torture. In the coming months, Taurus, I expect you to experience a turnaround that will have comparable poetic justice. I’m not sure how it will unfold. Maybe an adversary will praise you, a person who wounded you will make amends, or a force of nature that once opposed you will come over to your side. Twenty-eleven will be a Year of Vindicating Reversals.

GEMINI (May 21–June 20): Can you finally escape

the pain you got imprinted with during adolescence?

Is it a realistic possibility that you could triumph over the conditioning you absorbed before you knew how to talk? Do you have the power to do what few of us have done, which is to get out from under the weight of the past, shed the inertia of your memories, and live brave and free in the raw truth of NOW? If there will ever in your life be a time when you can accomplish at least some of this noble quest, Gemini, it will be in 2011.

CANCER (June 21–July 22): Decades ago, the U.S. built a network of sleek expressways to make it fast and easy for cars to travel between cities. But like many of America’s impressive engineering feats, this one took little account of what the human soul might enjoy. Ugly buildings or empty spaces surround many of those roads. Visually, the difference between I-95 in Georgia and I-74 in Illinois is negligible. “The Interstate highway system has made it possible,” said Charles Kuralt, “to go from sea to shining sea without seeing anything.” You cannot afford to let this be your operative metaphor in 2011, Cancerian. Your potential for rapid, extensive progress is sizable, but it would be a mistake to barrel along with your eyes fixed on the prize in the distance as you neglect what’s happening along the way. Be both global and local; romance the details as you revel in the big picture.

LEO (July 23–Aug. 22): Fixing people’s teeth is one of Dr. Peter Kertesz’s specialties. The British dentist has a thriving business in London. Now and then he’s also called on to practice an exotic variation: animal dentistry. Recently, he corrected the tooth problems of two tigers in a zoo. Other species he has helped include elephants, whales and pandas. In 2011, Leo, I suggest you consider branching out like Dr. Kertesz.

What would be the equivalent, in your domain, of expanding the ways you use your primary skills?

VIRGO (Aug. 23–Sept. 22): “What can I do with this

eternal longing?” That’s the first line of “Assouf,” a song by the African band Tinariwen. During the rest of the tune, the singer never offers a definitive answer to that plea, but as he tumbles and rumbles over the possibilities, the band plays a lot of righteous music. I suggest that you make Tinariwen’s cry your question of the year in 2011. It will be an excellent use of your time to meditate on how to call forth, nurture, and direct your ineffable, insatiable yearning. (Hear the song: http://tinyurl.com/Assouf.)

LIBRA (Sept. 23–Oct. 22): In 2011, I believe you will

have the chance to weave your fortunes together with an abundance of allies who are good for you. They will be your equals, they will share at least some of your most important values, and they will respect you for who you are. That’s excellent news, right? My only worry is that you might shy away from the demands that such invigorating collaborations will make on

you. It would be less work, after all, to fall back into reliance on more prosaic relationships that don’t ask so much of you. Please don’t take the easy way out, Libra. Rise to the occasion!

SCORPIO (Oct. 23–Nov. 21): Michelangelo didn’t think of himself as primarily a painter. Sculpture was his first love. Yet in 1508 he was coaxed into painting prodigious frescoes on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. As he worked for four years, covering 12,000 square feet with sublime images, he sometimes complained and felt resentful. The project took him away from two large sculptures he would have preferred to be working on. He feared his enemies had convinced the Pope to give him this task in order to demonstrate how mediocre his painting was. But today his work at the Sistine Chapel is regarded as a masterpiece. I suspect that in 2011 you may face a version of Michelangelo’s dilemma, Scorpio: being offered a job you don’t consider your forte. It’s quite possible, however, that accepting this “diversion” will yield interesting results.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22–Dec. 21): “When I became a man I put away childish things,” said Sagittarian author C.S. Lewis, “including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.” I suggest you take up that attitude yourself in 2011, Sagittarius. One of your top assignments in the coming months will be to play with greater intensity and more frequency and a heightened imagination. If you want to achieve your adult goals, you’ll be wise to re-create your childhood wisdom on a higher octave.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22–Jan. 19): “We Americans

are the best informed people on earth as to the events of the last 24 hours,” wrote historian Will Durant some decades ago. “We are the not the best informed as to the events of the last 60 centuries,” he concluded. Today this describes many Westerners, not just Americans. We are adrift in the Age of the Short Attention Span—a time when the lessons of the past are becoming lost or irrelevant. But in 2011, I’ll be rooting for you to elude this curse, Capricorn.

It’s crucial for you to be in close touch with both the lessons provided by the grand sweep of human civilization and by your own personal history.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20–Feb. 18): “The third-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the majority,” said author A.A. Milne. “The second-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the minority. The first-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking.” You will have an excellent chance to cultivate that definition of a first-rate mind in 2011, Aquarius. According to my reading of the astrological omens, life will be conspiring to strengthen your brain. You will have everything going for you if you make it your intention to sharpen your wits, use language more precisely, and see the world with greater clarity and objectivity. To get the fun started, make a list of what you could do to push your intelligence beyond its current limits.

PISCES (Feb. 19–March 20): “Anything you’re

good at contributes to happiness,” said philosopher Bertrand Russell. If I had my way, Pisces, you’d write that on a note and tape it to your bathroom mirror for the duration of 2011. I think it would raise your appreciation for the power your personal gifts have to bestow blessings on both yourself and others. And I hope it would inspire you to spend a lot of quality time finding out all you can about what you’re good at and deepening your capacity to do what you’re good at.

Homework: To check out my expanded audio forecast of your destiny in 2011, go to RealAstrology.com.

Go to REALASTROLOGY.COM to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. Audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700

M E T R OAC T I V E . C O M | SA N J O S E . C O M | D E C E M B E R 2 9 , 2 0 1 0 -J A N UA R Y 4 , 2 0 1 1 | M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

ARIES (March 21–April 19): “Just because everything is different doesn’t mean anything has changed,” said writer Irene Peter. That should be cautionary advice for you in 2011, Aries. From what I can tell, it will be relatively easy for you to rearrange the way things look, but trickier to transform them from the inside out. You will have to be vigilant to keep from getting swept up in the giddiness of big talk at the expense of practical action. You’ll have to push hard to make sure that seductive ideas are translated into concrete details. Can you do it? I think you can.

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BigBand Networks (BBND) seeks Sr QA Eng – Converged Video Exchange based at Redwood City, CA headquarters. Design, test company’s CVEx product. Req. BSCS + 5 yrs or MSCS + 3 yrs exp in testing and analyzing network products using relevant technology. Details at [ http://www.bigbandnet.com ]www.bigbandnet.com. To apply, send cover letter + resume to Julie Tripsha, BBND, 475 Broadway, Redwood City, CA 94063

Security/Bouncers Needed wanted 5 nights a week 9pm2am. Apply mornings only.

Alex’s 49er Lounge 2214 Business Circle, San Jose. 408/279-9737

Karaoke DJ wanted 7 days a week 9pm1:30am. Must have equipment. Apply mornings only.

Alex’s 49er Lounge 2214 Business Circle, San Jose.

408/279-9737

Intersil Communications Inc., leader in the design and manufacture of high performance analog semiconductors, has openings in Milpitas, CA for: Sr. CAE Engineer, responsible for overall CAE infrastructure and simulation support; Sr. Applications Engineer, provide application support for the development of the NonIsolated power management IC products; Sr. Packaging Engineer, design and develop packages for IC products including lead frame and interconnect methods; Business Development Manager, promote Intersil products and services and create new opportunities; and Sr. Design Engineer, lead a team involved in design and development of automotive, hot swap, hot pluggable mixed signal integrated circuits. If interested, mail resume to: Intersil, 1001 Murphy Ranch Road, Milpitas, CA 95035 (Attn: C. Aguirre).

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Computers Technical Lead, Analytics sought by Ooyala, Mountain View, CA. Dvlp customer-facing s/ware applics & associated infrastructure. Resume to Sonja Shevelyov, 800 W El Camino Real, #350, Mountain View, CA 94040.

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Earn $75-$200 Hour Media Makeup Artist Training. Ads, TV, film, fashion. One week class. Stable job in weak economy. Details at www.AwardMadeUpSchool.com 310/364-0665.

Bartenders Needed Fun jobs. Great money. Earn $25-40/hr. Call for certification and placement information. $199 tuition with this ad. 888.901.TIPS or visit www.abcbartending.com

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SELLING YOUR HOME? LOVE TO DECORATE? Attend our Do-It-Yourself home-staging/decorating workshop. Learn easy lowcost/no-cost design ideas for home re-sale or just for fun! Either Jan. 15 or Jan. 29, 10:30 AM - 1 PM. $20.00/person.

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Call 408.298.8000 Mon-Fri, Mon-Fri, 8:30am-5:30pm í Call classifieds@metronews.com o Please include í Email classifieds@metronews.com your V ISA, MC, Discver oor AmEx number and VISA, expir ation date ffor or paym ment expiration payment í Fax your ad to 408.271.3520

Metro Classified, 550 South Soutth First Street, Street, í Mail to Metro San Jose, CA 95113

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Legal Notices FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #545671 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: El Modern Laundromat, 820 E. El Camino Rd, #D, Mountain View, CA, 94040, Bai Nguyen, 3551 Peak Dr., San Jose, CA, 95127, Huong Ho. This business is conducted by a Husband an Wife.

Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on April 2007. /s/Huong Ho This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 12/14/2010. (pub Metro 12/22, 12/29/2010, 1/5, 1/12/2011)

Do You Have Asthma?

Enrolling people with asthma, ages 18-65, for the next few months into a 10 week research study using an investigational oral medication.

Qualified participants will receive study related medical exams and study medication at no cost, and may receive compensation up to $1,060.00.

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Allergy & Asthma Associates of Santa Clara Valley Research Center 4050 Moorpark Avenue, Suite 6 San Jose, CA 95117 408.553.0709 ext. 237

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #545402

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Twisted Chill, 2095 Flintcrest Dr, San Jose, CA, 95148, Jesse Soares, Michael Moules, 1670 Washington St., Santa Clara, CA, 95050.

This business is conducted by a General Partnership.

Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on. /s/Jesse Soares This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 12/08/2010. (pub Metro 12/15, 12/22, 12/29/2010, 1/05/2011)

Phyllis Koster and Henrick Koster:

The property left at 1620 Gold St. will be sold or destroyed on December 30, 2010.

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #544489 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Silverline Services, 14938 Camden Ave., Suite 22, San Jose, CA, 95124, Jose Romero.

This business is conducted by a Individual.

Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 11/01/10. /s/Jose Romero This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 11/25/2008. (pub Metro 12/03, 12/10, 12/17, 12/24/2008)

Gala Event to Benefit Open Heart Kitchen Saturday, Jan. 8th 6 pm to 8 pm Tickets $10.00 (cash or check only) A Magical Evening of Wine Tasting, Appertizers, Entertainment & Orchids.

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USING ONE OF THESE?

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“People get stuck in style ruts,” says Phipps over lunch in downtown San Jose. “They have to be willing to change, and not everybody is.”

For those who are ready to make a change, Phipps and her team of stylists are experts at taking personal appearance to the next level.

“I really know how to communicate with clients,” says Phipps, who prides herself on hearing what clients are trying to communicate and what their real fears are. This often includes having to banish the things that negative people have said to them. “It’s just about making women feel more confident,” she adds.

For Phipps, Urban Darling is a natural extension of what she loves

doing. Several years ago, she was talking with a business consultant who asked her what kind of business she would like to start. Phipps didn’t have an answer, so the consultant asked her what she liked to do. “I said I like to shop,” Phipps recalls with a smile.

The consultant’s response changed the course of Phipps’ career and life.

“She said, ‘I hate to shop,’” recounts Phipps. “‘There’s a huge business right there.’”

“I had no idea that this type of thing existed,” says Phipps, who became a stylist and found herself being approached by other women who wanted to do the same thing, and the idea for Urban Darling was born.

Now with 14 stylists in 10 states, Urban Darling is helping people all over to step up their style game.

Urban Darling offers several services, including closet shopping to help reconfigure existing wardrobes; closet audits to determine whether clothing is reflective of one’s desired lifestyle; look-overhauling shopping trips; and soon-to-be-unveiled virtual styling.

“You need clothing,” says Phipps.

“So you may as well look cute wearing it. And you don’t have to spend a million bucks.”

Initially catering to stay-at-home moms, who tend to take care of everyone but themselves, Urban Darling has expanded to include corporate and professional women who want to add some polish to their look. “They want to be attractive,” says Phipps, “but also be seen as professional and goal oriented.”

Urban Darling also serves everyday women who just don’t like to shop—a notion that is unimaginable to Phipps. “Our stylists really love the idea of the every woman,” she says. “We treat all our clients like celebrities.”

The name of the game for Urban Darling is finding out why people have come to them. Whether they need a new look for home, work or play, Phipps and her team of stylists are trained to help. “We have clients fill out a profile to paint us a picture of their life. Then we go over the profile with them in order to understand what they want,” says Phipps. “But I always ask clients, ‘Where is your nice, special stuff ?’” says Phipps. “‘We’re going to start wearing that now.’”

The future looks bright for Urban Darling, with three more stylists coming on board in early 2011, a steady stream of grateful clients and a thriving company based on one woman’s vision to help people to look and feel their best. “I want people to know that they can come to us and we’ll help them out,” says Phipps, who adds that now is the time to start looking great. “Don’t feel intimidated to call,” she says.

“And don’t wait to lose that 10 pounds. Just call.”

Aware of the potential that personal appearance has to transform lives, Phipps notes that she’s proud of what Urban Darling is doing. “We’re kind of lifechangers in a very subtle way,” she says. “We’re not curing cancer, but damn it, when a person feels good about themselves it emanates and they pay it forward.”

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Uh, yeah. It’s called reality. Eliminate that and you’ve got the problem licked.

Since you seem like the can-do type, Dan, we’ll put you in charge of highway maintenance and see how well you manage. Here’s a rundown on the challenges you’ll face.

Weather. The principal phenomenon of interest is the infamous freeze-thaw cycle: snow falls, melts, seeps into cracks and freezes again. The pressure of the expanding ice inexorably breaks up the pavement. Another factor is road salt, which can filter down into concrete and corrode the steel rebar within. So if you can do something about winter, half your problems disappear.

Traffic. Roads would last a lot longer if it weren’t for all the vehicles driving on them. It’s not uncommon to hear of highways in U.S. urban areas carrying double or more the traffic they were designed for. Trucks are particularly problematic. The rule of thumb among highway engineers is that road deterioration is roughly proportional to vehicle axle weight to the fourth power: doubling the weight on an axle increases the wear and tear on the roads by 24, or 16 times. Roads are usually designed assuming that a single axle on a big truck carries a maximum of 18,000 pounds.

Compared to a typical car carrying 2,000 pounds per axle, a fully loaded truck stresses the road surface 6,561 times as much. Minor overloading can make a big difference. Exceeding the maximum load by just 10 percent increases road stress by 46 percent—that’s why you see all those weigh stations on highways.

Money. Or more precisely, lack of money. Generally speaking, U.S. highways were built on the cheap, meant to last just 20 years. Unfortunately, some parts of the Interstate Highway System are now 50 or more years old.

Highways in Europe are built to endure much longer than those in the U.S. For example, the Netherlands expects its roads to last 40 years. How do they manage it? Although European highway designers use a variety of advanced techniques, two things stand out: thicker, more durable roadbeds and greater reliance on concrete. This is something

that as highway czar you’re going to need to know about, Dan, so pay attention.

The two main paving materials are concrete and asphalt. Concrete is strong and durable, but building roads out of it is complex, expensive and slow—you need a lot of rebar, the concrete has to cure, etc. Concrete roads also tend to be noisy, and slick when wet, and when they do eventually fail, they’re a pain to repair.

Asphalt, by comparison, is cheap, forgiving and fast. True, it tends to fall apart quickly, but you can easily patch it till things have really gone to the dogs, at which point you just resurface the whole road. You can spread and roll the paving in the morning and drive on it in the afternoon, minimizing complaints by impatient motorists. The drawback is that you have to do this every few years.

Don’t get me wrong. You can make long-lasting roads using asphalt; in fact some modern highways use a combination of asphalt and concrete to get the best of both worlds. But there’s no simple way to do this. You have to rip out the original roadway and redo it from scratch. That’s what they did in Chicago a few years ago when rebuilding the Dan Ryan Expressway, a perpetually clogged truck route carrying 300,000 vehicles per day on a road designed for 150,000. The original road typically consisted of 12 inches of aggregate (crushed rock), 10 inches of concrete and five inches of asphalt, for a total depth of 27 inches. The new highway has a 24-inch-deep aggregate sub-base, six inches of asphalt, then 14 inches of concrete, for a total of 44 inches.

Good news: it’s supposed to last 30 years—some say 40. Bad news: rebuilding 10 miles cost close to $1 billion. The National Highway System, consisting of all critical U.S. roads, is 160,000 miles long. The American Society of Civil Engineers estimates that the country’s roads and bridges will need $930 billion worth of work over the next five years, less than half of which is likely to happen. So that’s your final challenge, Dan. Once you’ve got the weather and the trucks under control, you’ll have to see if you can make money grow on trees.

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