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5TPa[Tbb5^^S Petalumaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plentiful pastures of community-supported farming

By Art Kusnetz

9

ust as Napa Valley has become known for its wines, the Petaluma Valley has become known for the quality and diversity of its food. Within a dayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s walk of Petaluma are dozens of small-town dairies, farms, orchards and ranches. While many are organic, the vast majority have discovered that you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to be certified organic in order to embrace sustainable practices or achieve the attendant profitability. Petaluma, by both happy accident and intention, has preserved enough open space and agricultural assets around itself to potentially feed its population and then some. More importantly, the farmers and ranchers surrounding the city see the potential to do so without the use of pesticides and with a reduction in the use of fossil fuels. Tara and Craig Smith, who own Tara Firma Farms, are committed to offering healthy, chemicalfree, all-natural produce and raising grass-fed, pasture-raised pigs, cows and chickens. Tara Firma Farms gives tours of its operation and hosts what is fast becoming the hottest ticket in town: its farm-to-table dinners. The menu features ingredients raised or grown on location, from potato leek soup and cucumber and tomato salads to roasted chicken and braised short ribs. Tara Firma is at the forefront of a movement to feed the planet through sustainable, community-supported agriculture, known widely as CSA. Community-supported agriculture means that you, the consumer, pledge to buy a share of the farmâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s produce. By financially supporting the farm, it helps to keep the food supply local, support sustainable practices and lower fossil-fuel usage by reducing the need to import food. At Tara Firma, customers can buy CSA packages of meat, produce or a combination of both. At Progressive Pastures, located just north of Petaluma, Leo Ghirardelli (no relation to the chocolate family) runs a herd of Black and Red Angus with a Black Wagyu bull, creating a crossbred named American-style Kobe beef. Leo divides his 60-acre ranch into

as many as 10 different fields, explaining that pasture management is the key to reducing overgrazing. Leaving a good covering of grass or clover allows the land to hold its topsoil, reduce runoff and generally makes for healthier pastures, which in turn makes for a healthier herd with higher weights, better marbling and tastier meat. He plants native perennials, and last year was able to cut enough hay on-site to substantially reduce his feed costs. When selecting animals for slaughter, he uses a local slaughter yard, specifying the method for slaughter because factors like stress and adrenaline affect the taste of the meat. The meat then goes to a local company, where it will hang for four weeks and then be made into different cuts and delivered to Leo for distribution to his CSAs. Just west of Petaluma is Canvas Ranch, where Deborah Walton and her husband Tim Schaible sell CSAs of culinary and medicinal herbs, Asian pears, lavender and Araucana chicken eggs. They also raise cashmere goats for their coats and lease 24-four inch tall Babydoll Southdown sheep to vineyards for weed control, thereby reducing pesticide use. If you eat fruits or vegetables, you have a dutyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;a responsibility, evenâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;to know and care where your food comes from. If you eat meat, you should care how your meat is being raised and processed. Can you, as Leo Ghirardelli claims, taste the fear in your meat? If we are to flourish in the coming years, we need to reduce our dependence on pesticides and fossils fuels. We will need to look locally for unadulterated food and wean ourselves from foodstuffs that burn shiploads of fossil fuel. We will need to learn Tara Firma Farmâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s motto: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Know your farmer, know your food.â&#x20AC;? Change is coming. Embrace it, support it, and enjoy it by getting to know a local farmer and buying a share of bounty.

Change is coming. Embrace it, support it, and enjoy it by getting to know a local farmer.

Art Kusnetz is a freelance writer living in Petaluma. For more on local farms near you, see www.localharvest.org. Open Mic is a weekly feature in the Bohemian. We welcome your contribution. To have your topical essay of 700 words considered for publication, write openmic@bohemian.com.

THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

05


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Âź055>A301;4½>1942C8>=B While the resurrection of the Rio Nido Lodge is probably good news, I was disturbed by Elizabeth Parkerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s statement that â&#x20AC;&#x153;there are people . . . afraid that [the developer] might put affordable housing in.â&#x20AC;? Since when is that a bad thing? I object to the casual implied conf lation of affordable housing with ex-cons, drug use and prostitution. With all the people losing their homes and/or jobs in Sonoma County, availability of reasonably priced rentals is essential for the less aff luent among us. The fact is that when housing becomes unaffordable, you get homeless families.

Does anyone really think thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s preferable to the alternative?

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6>40BH>=2>=B?8A02HC74>A8BCB I chuckled when I read the editorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s request for fewer conspiratorial letters (â&#x20AC;&#x153;Dept. of Sanity,â&#x20AC;? Dec. 1). I have a wealthy, conservative friend who three years ago would have laughed in my face if I had suggested that Goldman Sachs was conspiring to rip off many of its naive clients. Now, he and his well-connected buddies wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t touch the stock market. They claim

the Federal Reserve and the U.S. Treasury are intentionally manipulating the market. To study the writings of ex-CIA operatives is to discover that large covert operations can be successfully perpetrated with few individuals understanding the full scope of the operations. Most operatives perform on a need-to-know basis. They fulfill their patriotic duty without considering the full ramifications of their actions. Our lives are filled with conspiracies of interests and values. As Americans, we conspire to pay taxes to support mass slaughter in cities we canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t pronounce. We pretend that the American battlefield of predatory capitalism is the best way to scrape out a living. We pretend we are intelligent animals, while destroying the ecosystems that support our intelligence. We pretend we are smarter than nature, forgetting that nature gave us the ability to think. Ideas that are on the cutting edge of change are usually vilified as crazy before they hit the mainstream. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know if the other two letter writers were correct in their conspiracy theories, but I enjoyed reading them.

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8=B?8A43C>068C0C4 I found this article inspiring (â&#x20AC;&#x153;Start Agitating: Norman Solomon on getting out there and doing something,â&#x20AC;? Dec. 1). It brings to my mind other courageous reporters. Had Bradley Manning and Wikileaks revealed the truth about Iraq before the invasion, we would have kept our soldiers and tax dollars at home. We also would have understood the problems with the Federal Reserve and agitated earlier to save billions, if not trillions of dollars. No foreclosure crisis, pension funds lost, jobless recovery and healthcare atrocities. We should all support journalists who report the truthâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the foundation of any movement.

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C742>E4C43BC0<? Frey Vineyards is one of only a dozen or so winemakers allowed to use â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;USDA Organicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; on their product.

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â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Organicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; standards for wine not what they seem By Alastair Bland

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he integrity of the organic industry is at stake here,â&#x20AC;? says Butte County winemaker Phil LaRocca. â&#x20AC;&#x153;How can you call something organic and then add a synthetic to it?â&#x20AC;? Yet a petition making its way to the National Organic Standards Board would do just that, and supporters insist that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fair labeling. Mendocino County winemaker Paul Dolan, for example, farms and utilizes organic grapes. So does the Barra family of Mendocino, and the Benziger family in Glen Ellen. But a clause deep within the National Organic Programâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pages of legal jargon prohibits these and hundreds of other winemakers around the world from labeling their bottles â&#x20AC;&#x153;USDA Organic.â&#x20AC;? This prohibition leaves the privilege solely to about a dozen winemakers in the world who not

only use organic grapes to make their wines but who also add no sulfites, or sulfur dioxide, before bottling. As supporters are quick to point out, sulfites are a common preservative that have been used by most winemakers in the world since the 15th century. Dolan and others say that the National Organic Programâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s law itself is illegal, directly contradicting the Federal Organic Foods Production Act of 1990, which states clearly that sulfites may be added to organic wines. To clear the conflict, and to make space for their wines in the coveted USDA Organic category, three partiesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;Paul Dolan Vineyards, Barra of Mendocino and Organic Vintners Inc., a Boulder, Colo., distributor of organic winesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;submitted a petition on April 1 to the National Organic Standards Board requesting a modification to the law. Currently, the National Organic Program states that organic wines containing up

to 100 parts per million of added sulfites may only be labeled as â&#x20AC;&#x153;made with organic grapesâ&#x20AC;? or â&#x20AC;&#x153;made with organically grown grapesâ&#x20AC;? instead of â&#x20AC;&#x153;USDA Organicâ&#x20AC;? when sold within the United States. Shawn Harmon, sales manager at Barra of Mendocino, feels that the â&#x20AC;&#x153;made withâ&#x20AC;? category is perceived by consumers as a lesser denomination, and he, along with Dolan and others, wants the right to use the USDA Organic seal. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Our wines are organic, identical to [Frey Vineyardsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;], except that they contain a small amount of sulfites, which the Organic Foods Production Act allows,â&#x20AC;? Harmon says. Ukiah winemaker Paul Frey, who, like LaRocca, produces wine containing only organic grapes and no added sulfites, firmly opposes the petition. Frey Vineyards is one of the oldest and largest makers of USDA Organic wines in the world, and Frey &'

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fears a crumbling of the current laws. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I believe that any organic standards should be strengthened over time, never weakened,â&#x20AC;? Frey urges, adding that to permit the addition of sulfites in wines labeled USDA Organic â&#x20AC;&#x153;would definitely be weakening the system.â&#x20AC;? But the petition does not ask to introduce a new and previously prohibited chemical to winemaking, claim its authors. The Federal Organic Foods Production Act, in Section 6510.3, already allows sulfites to be used in organic wine, Harmon points out, and he says that only by the contradiction introduced by the National Organic Program have he and hundreds of others been cordoned into the â&#x20AC;&#x153;made withâ&#x20AC;? category. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in direct conflict with the Act,â&#x20AC;? Harmon said. Paolo Bonetti, president of Organic Vintners Inc., deals exclusively in organically farmed wines. Bonetti says many of his foreign-made bottles can legally be called â&#x20AC;&#x153;organicâ&#x20AC;? in their respective nations of origin but must unfairly wear a special â&#x20AC;&#x153;made withâ&#x20AC;? label when sold in the United States. Like Harmon, Bonetti stresses that their petition to the government does not attempt to weaken the existing laws of organic winemaking. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We just want to change the [National Organic Programâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s] annotation so that organic wines with added sulfites can be called â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;organicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and not have to be called â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;made with organic grapes,â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? Bonetti says. Though the Food and Drug Administration says sulfites are â&#x20AC;&#x153;generally recognized as safeâ&#x20AC;? for consumption, the World Health Organization calls sulfur dioxide an â&#x20AC;&#x153;allergen,â&#x20AC;? and many consumers believe themselves to be allergic to the preservative. Steve Frankel, a Ukiah wine distributor, says he has indeed seen a rise in demand for wines with minimal or no sulfites. â&#x20AC;&#x153;For these people, to walk into a natural foods store and see that USDA logo gives them the feeling that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re buying a pure product,â&#x20AC;? explains Frankel, who owns Organic Vintages and distributes USDA Organic wines to New York, New Jersey and Connecticut. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be fair to call all these wines [with added sulfites] across the board â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;organic.â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? Frankel thinks consumers would feel â&#x20AC;&#x153;misled,â&#x20AC;? but Harmon doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. He, like Dolan, says heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not looking to pass off his wines as sulfite-free, and that a note on each bottle of his familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wines advising consumers of sulfites would provide adequate warning of the additive. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Consumers arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stupid,â&#x20AC;? Harmon says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re wine drinkers and they think theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re allergic to sulfites, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll read the back of the bottle and look for the sulfitefree wines.â&#x20AC;? The organic wine market is a struggling industry, and Dolan wants to see it grow. To increase the availability of USDA Organic wines through a simple change of current laws could increase consumer interest, Dolan says; demand for organic grapes would increase, and the environment could benefit. The National Organic Standards Board is currently reviewing the bid to edit the organic-wine labeling laws, and the decision to change or uphold the existing law is scheduled to occur sometime before 2013.

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By Juliane Poirier

8

helped a friend take out a vineyard recently, and I confess I enjoyed it much more than I should have. It was only a small backyard vineyard in Napa, but it seemed much bigger for symbolic reasons. Too often I give in to sarcasm at the news of more vineyards receiving development permits in the Napa Valley. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thank God!â&#x20AC;? I stoop to exclaim, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I was worried we wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have enough vineyards!â&#x20AC;? This admittedly cheap shot is often followed by a mock-enthusiastic comment about how soon the bulldozers can rush here to strip out the trees and carve the hillside. With tongue planted in cheek, I praise the businessperson for his or her originality, and when I start with all of this, someone inevitably reminds me to be grateful that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vines getting planted and not strip malls. Good point. For the record, I am a huge fan of sustainable winegrowing. In 2002, I wrote a book advocating the practice (Vineyards in the Watershed: Sustainable Winegrowing in Napa County). Since its release, there seem to be even more growers who think out of the box and work constantly to make winegrowing more sustainable. My hat is off to them, especially to the vineyard owners behind the Agricultural Preserve, that piece of local law protecting the Napa Valley from looking just like Walnut Creek or Santa Rosa. Now those were original thinkers; they protected their business interests and improved the quality of life for the community as a side effect. Such radical, forward thinking. My own forward thinking involves seeing something more than wine grapes growing in Napa, Sonoma and Marin. Call me radical, but vegetables and fruit trees have been grown here in the past quite successfully, and the day may come when locally sourced food is, well, the only food. I have already praised in this column the people in Napa County, including wine

grape growers, who are planting food crops in the areas of land where grapes donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t f lourish, in particular the controversial riparian zones, which are spots along the river where the critters always seem to have the upper hand. On my friendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s property, I learn that vineyard demolition is hard work. The vines have to be chain-sawed at the roots, and to get the blade close to the vines, we first have to remove the wire trellising system around which the vine grew. In the old days (and in a few remnants surviving the engineering of modern vineyards), the grape vines grew up on their own legs, and when they got old enough, they looked like gnarled trees. I recall such vines from long-ago Sonoma County as I fight to recoil the stiff wire we cut from the deeply sunken fencing poles. The wires snap back forcefully enough that by the end of three hours, each of us has at least one trellis injuryâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the prize going to the bloody forehead cutâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;which we wear as badges of agricultural courage, and proof we have fought the good fight with the damned wire. Why weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re doing this crazy thing of ripping out vines is because my friend is fed up and doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t care for the â&#x20AC;&#x153;gentleman farmerâ&#x20AC;? bragging rights so coveted by others with vines. Instead, he wants room for his kids to play and space for a garden. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m proud to assist. As I wrestle with a wire stubbornly attached to a pole, I notice a vine with a trunk of smaller circumference than the rest. I stare a few seconds, then drop the wire and cutters. With gloved hands, I grab the horizontal arms of the T-shaped vine and pull hard. There is a slight give. I grab again with greater conviction and pull as hard as I can for as long as I can until, with a sudden jerk, the vine lets go and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m standing with a vine, roots and all, at chest height, victorious. I did it! And the act is exhilarating. With my own hands Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve contributed to there being less wine and more food growing in my community. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a start.

With my own hands, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve contributed to there being less wine and more food in my community.


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D=;8:4;H?A8I4 Certain mushrooms, like this king bolete, are in rare numbers this year.

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B^H^dFP]]P7d]c<dbWa^^\b. A beginnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s primer to foraging locally By Jake Bayless

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early a year and a half ago now, I moved with my wife and our two boys into her childhood home near Salt Point State Park on the coast in northern Sonoma County. At the time, I had no idea that I was about to discover a new, productive, exciting and adventurous hobby: mushroom hunting. What the natives, the Russians at Fort Ross and locals have known here for generations is that this is one of the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s greatest mushroom-hunting areas. Largely specific to coastal California counties, the temperate climateâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;buffered by the heat sink of the Pacific Oceanâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;coastal fog, rain and forest duff and decay make for what could possibly be the perfect mushroom-rearing environment. One of the most amazing things to me about hunting for mushrooms, apart from the unending delicious meals direct from our

backyard, is that the activity simply couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t exist without people, storytelling and human interaction. It truly is one of the last great oral traditions in our societyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;heck, in the world. Mushrooming is also timed to perfectly coincide with the departure of the beloved summer veggies, bringing another bounty to the table altogether. Of course, mushroom hunting is not for the faint of heart. There is a tremendous risk: death. Were it not for folks willing to teach us the tradition and how to distinguish the yummy from the deadly, we might just see mushroom hunting disappear. For example, the distinction between one of the most delicious common mushrooms, the coccora, and the death cap is so slight and so very critical that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nearly impossible to make by book alone. Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re thinking you might want to take the plunge and do some foraging? Great! First things first: never eat a wild mushroom. (Our lawyers made us say that.) Still got the bug? Super! Hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what to do:

Get a book. While mushroom-hunting guidebooks can never examine specimens for you and verify that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re safe to consume, they are a fantastic start and a priceless companion in the field. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve found that most of the varieties of mushroom found in the North Bay are described in witty text and color prints in David Aroraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s All That the Rain Promises and More: A Hip Pocket Guide to Western Mushrooms (Ten Speed Press; $17.99). Many mushroom diehards consider this and Aroraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Mushrooms Demystified (Ten Speed Press; $39.99) to be the casual mycologistâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bibles. Both books and a trove of additional info can be found via www.davidarora.com. Head down to the local bookshop and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re likely to find many more books with illustrations, but Aroraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s place in local mushroom hunting culture is solid. I had the pleasure of attending the standing-room-only November meeting of the Sonoma County Mycological Association, where Arora was the guest speaker, a meeting that filled the Sonoma County Farm Bureau &THE BOHEMIAN

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building with more than 140 enthusiastic listeners. Recently, Arora purchased a home just outside Gualala in southern Mendocino County, and now the bounty of coastal mushrooms heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s studied for decades is just outside his front door. Find an expert. Check out a local mycological association. You might be surprised how many people just like you are interested in learning more. The crux is that you shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t ever trust yourself to identify a mushroom to eat until you know the mushroom by heart. Find someone who knows, who has foraged extensively, who has learned from other mushroom fanatics and who has lived to teach you the way. I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stress this enough. Finding an amazing mushroom can be euphoric, like finding a $100 bill in an old pair of jeans, except the forest floor is covered with old pairs of jeans. However, if eating a mushroom sends you to the hospital with liver failure because you didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get the identification right, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t call me. Remember, this is an oral tradition; it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t work without other people. Find someone you trust, someone skeptical of mushrooms and averse to risk, and have them teach you. In Sonoma County, there is a fantastic resource in the Sonoma County Mycological Association, open to everyone and packed to the gills with friendly folks whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be happy to teach you everything they know. Their email group is very active and participatory, and is an excellent local archive for mushroomers. The association has open meetings every month in Santa Rosa, regular outings, friendly and fun members, passionate guest speakers, and they encourage beginners to bring mushrooms to meetings for identification. Visit www.somamushrooms. org or the Mycological Society of San Francisco at www.mssf.org. Get out of the house and do it! Mycologists and experienced hunters call it a â&#x20AC;&#x153;foray.â&#x20AC;? Of course, you can go on a foray by yourself, but once you think you know your stuff, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d encourage getting hooked up with one of the organized forays various mycological associations have throughout the year. In Sonoma County, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only one park which is open to recreational mushroom harvesting with no permit necessary: Salt Point State Park, about a 30minute drive north of Jenner on Highway 1. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a five-pound daily limit in Salt Point, but there are no restrictions on the types of mushrooms, and believe me, there are some heavenly mushrooms in Salt Point. In Marin, Mount Tamalpais State Park, Samuel P. Taylor State Park, Tomales Bay State Park and Point Reyes National Seashore are also open to casual mushroom hunting. And lastly, be sure to bring a map. At minimum, be certain youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re on state park property when you take a mushroom or hike a trail. Lots of folks get lost in the park or, worse still, take mushrooms from private property. Make sure you know where you are, and where it is OK to take a mushroom. Verify your treasure. Trust your

A40;;854BD?4A<0A8>1A>B Kids are great at finding what their parents sometimes miss.

scientific identification skills? Are you sure? Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s be honest, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always better to have someone scrutinize your finds with you. I recall being on a foray with my neighbor Fritz, a veteran of mushrooming and someone who has lived among the coastal bounty for the better part of 40 years. I was certain I had found a delicious coccora, and was just about to toss it into my basket when Fritz said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Wait!â&#x20AC;? I looked his way, just a few steps from where I had found the golden nugget. At Fritzâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s foot was what I came to learn was a death capâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;growing right next to my coccora. Of course, this might not mean much to the beginner, and certainly didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t to me, until Fritz hypothesized, â&#x20AC;&#x153;What if the mycelium underground beneath the death cap had commingled with the coccoraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mycelium?â&#x20AC;? He was right. It wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t a risk worth taking. I happily thanked Fritz. Verify your treasure, and hunt with an expert. Cooking and preparation. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve personally only been at this great little mushroom hunting hobby for a bit more than a year now, but in this short time, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve learned that there are nearly as many recipes and preparation styles as there are mushrooms themselves. Once the hardest part of hunting and verification is done, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time to really get cooking and enjoy the meal. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve found that the best preparations are going to come from the mouths of folks you pick to be your mentors. Who better to tell you what tastes best and how? While some of the tastiest recipes Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve tried use nothing more than mushrooms, heat and butter, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find that the various mycological associations also have robust recipe sections, as well as active email groups. They are wonderful resources full of great folks willing to teach you anything they know. Lean on them, and foray!


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270=68=60CC8A4 acon has always held a place at the breakfast table, but the slippery delight has lately been relegated to nothing more than a way to feed a greasyfatty food ďŹ x. That is, until Bigi Voix, a staunch vegetarian, had a life-altering brush with bacon that forever changed her and the Bay Area art scene. She fell off the vegan wagon over a bacon-binge weekend and became inspired, or more like obsessed, by pork in strip form. Her passion evolved into a photography collection, where bacon interplays with Voix herself as model.

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Voixâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ďŹ rst series is on display in Napa through the end of the month. The portraits range broadly, from a 1950s pinup pool girl with a beehive hairdo done up in bacon to a recreation of Bruce Springsteenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s classic Born in the USA album cover with bacon stuffed into the Bossâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s back pocket instead of a baseball cap. Each photo is accompanied by a snarky write-up that speaks to the artistâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inspiration, and joined by sometimes fearful factoids about bacon, like the differences between fat and lard and stats about the average Americanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bacon consumption. In concert with the exhibit, Silverado Brewing Company is offering bacon specials all month long. The photos will be available come 2011, in calendar formâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the perfect gift for the meatloving ďŹ end in your life. Whether you love bacon, hate it or yearn to bring a little of Bigiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bacon to a home near you, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss out on this one-of-a-kind display of art in the making. Bigi Voixâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bacon series runs through December at Silverado Brewing Co., 3020 St. Helena Hwy., St. Helena. 707.967.9876.

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C0BCH14H>=3 F>A3B athleen White didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need words to prove to the managers at Sheltonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Natural Foods Market that her cheesecakes deserved a place on their shelves. She simply walked into the Healdsburg store with a written introduction and plenty of samples.

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White didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t always plan on being a baker. Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d had a 25-year career as a professional dancer and actress in Los Angeles and on Broadway. But in 1990, White contracted viral meningoencephalitis on a weekend trip and fell into an 11-day coma. When she woke up, she was unable to speak. Though some of her speech slowly returned, she lives now with what she calls a speech difference.

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Not that she needed to talk up her goat cheese, pistachio crust cheesecakes to the market. The taste said it all, and theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re now available in bite-size dozens ($25) at Sheltonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a new career that ďŹ ts the energetic redhead well. White was thrilled by the local food and wine bounty of Healdsburg when she moved here in 2008, and after formally trying goat cheese for the ďŹ rst time, she knew she had to ďŹ nd a way to use the product. Speechless Cakes is her one-woman mail order business, the name in homage to her own experiences and how she hopes people feel after tasting a slice. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The name Speechless . . . is strong in so many levels,â&#x20AC;? writes White in an email. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Moreover, it is that good!â&#x20AC;? White bakes at Healdsburgâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Costeaux French Bakery, which allows her use of its kitchen, and runs the business from her Blackberry. For the current holiday season, sales are brisk, but White strives to keep every aspect of her enterprise grounded. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The cakes are made from local ingredients, baked in a local kitchen,â&#x20AC;? she explains, and â&#x20AC;&#x153;the look of the cheesecake is homemade.â&#x20AC;? Whiteâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cheesecakes are available in just one variety, though special ingredients and lactose- and gluten-free cakes are possible by request. Lime zest and kiwi coulis add a touch of high-end ďŹ&#x201A;avor. Along with the small bites, customers can also order four- and seven-inch rounds online ($25â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$40). Rather than succumb to circumstances, White returned to school after her illness, earning a masterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s degree in theater arts in 1999 and a bachelorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s degree in law studies in 2004. Throughout it all, White says, sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;rediscovered hope.â&#x20AC;? And White isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t done performing, eitherâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;though the stage is now smaller and smells slightly of livestock. In her spare time, she dances with Lulu, her sponsored Nigerian dwarf goat at a farm in Penngrove.

We Need Your Jugs! (growlers)

kegs & cases to go too

Now Open for Refills Fridays, 12-5pm or call for an appt. 2064 Gravenstein Hwy N, building 4 -iL>Ă&#x192;Ă&#x152;Â&#x153;ÂŤÂ&#x153;Â?Ă&#x160;UĂ&#x160;Ă&#x2021;äĂ&#x2021;°nĂ&#x201C;Â&#x2122;°£Ă&#x201C;Ă&#x201C;Ă&#x17D; Ă&#x153;Ă&#x153;Ă&#x153;°>ViVÂ&#x2C6;`iĂ&#x20AC;°VÂ&#x153;Â&#x201C;

Speechless Cakes are available at Sheltonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Natural Foods Market, 428 Center St., Healdsburg. 707.431.0530.

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THE BOHEMIAN

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12.08.10-12.14.10

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/2'!.)#s&!)2 ,9 42 !$%$s3534!).!",9(!26%34%$ Our Mission is to steweard and restore 200,00 acres od South American Atlantic rainforest and create over 1,000 living wage jobs by 2020 by leveraging our Market Driven Restoration business model.

W E SERV E ORG A N IC L O CA L F O OD

=i\\N`$=`Â&#x203A;Rent our space for your next party www.guayaki.com/bar Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/guayakimatebar for SPECIAL promotions and become a fan! Check out our twitter page twitter.com/GuayakiMateBar DfeĂ&#x2020;=i`((XdĂ&#x2020;*gdÂ&#x203A;Closed Saturday & Sunday 6782 Sebastopol Ave, Sebastopol

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30E4A> B>=><0 lthough it had become spotty and dog-eared by late November, the basil in my care soldiered on amid a frost-burned, fetid garden, looking green enough for a season ďŹ nale batch of pesto. I stuffed some choice leaves into the food processor, then shelved the project in the fridge while I considered this: since olive oil is the second ingredient to pesto, shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t I use the very freshest, most artisanal, locally pressed extra virgin that my budget will allow?

A

At Davero, locally renowned purveyor of exactly that product, Colleen McGlynn is happy to disabuse me of this notion. The strong ďŹ&#x201A;avors of garlic and basil simply overwhelm the spicy, grassy nuances of the best olive oilâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;better to treat it as a simple lubricant in pesto, after all. But drizzled over ribollita, a Tuscan soup with cannellini beans, bread and kale? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Heaven,â&#x20AC;? McGlynn sighs. Olives arrived in California along with mission bells, but Ridgely Evers was the ďŹ rst to bring in certain highquality, Tuscan oil varieties in 1990. Today, Evers and McGlynn distribute olive trees from their nursery, press oil from their 22-acre olive grove, run a biodynamic vineyard, farm and, since September, tasting room located where Westside Road bends south, cattycorner from Madrona Manor. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a nice break from just winetasting, and for and non-wine wine country gifts, the infused oils, jams and lavender soaps therein are estate-grown, too, from green tomato conserve to Meyer lemon curd. Served up in little paper cups, Dry Creek Valley Estate Olio Nuovo ($32) is as green as moss on rocks, smells like wheat grass and tickles like pepper. The Extra Virgin ($32) is a mellower, buttery version from last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s harvest. Responding to chef demand, DaVero blended estate product with others from California and Spain to make â&#x20AC;&#x153;Line Lubeâ&#x20AC;? ($24) affordable, versatile and also available by the gallon ($74). As to DaVeroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wine, degrease the palate with the crisp, dry 2008 Rosato of Sangiovese, soon to be ofďŹ cially released. Bright and ďŹ rm, black cherry-andblack olive, the 2006 Sangiovese ($45) is a score for Cal-Ital, while the 2008 Sagrantino ($95) is in a different league, with ďŹ&#x201A;oral aromas of muscat, apricot and juniper berry, and leaving a ďŹ ne, dry ďŹ nish that sweeps the cobwebs from the top palate. DaVeroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;365â&#x20AC;? nonvintage red ($22) is an everyday, hearty blend for simpler moments, like tucking into some whole wheat rotelle and homemade pesto. DaVero Sonoma, 766 Westside Road, Healdsburg. Open 10am to 5pm daily except Tuesday. Nominal tasting fee $15 (psstâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t sweat it). 707.431.8000.

James Knight

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THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

23


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The idea for Danny Sorentinoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new CD materialized unexpectedly last July. The local songwriter had just played a benefit concert on the gazebo stage in Cotatiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s La Plaza Park, and as Sorentino stood there with KRSH-FM broadcaster Bill Bowker, he mentioned that his very first show took place on that same little stage, not long after the gazebo was first built. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Suddenly,â&#x20AC;? he says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I was talking about other places Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve played in the area. I started thinking about all the places in Sonoma County Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve had experiences at. And I kind of had this epiphanyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;that I know Sonoma County better than I know any other spot on the planet. So I thought, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Maybe Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll write some songs about this.â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? The next day he wrote a song titled simply â&#x20AC;&#x153;Cotati,â&#x20AC;? with the catchy chorus, â&#x20AC;&#x153;C-O-T-A-T-I, you can let your freak flag fly in Cotati!â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;And then,â&#x20AC;? says Sorentino, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I just kept coming up with more songs.â&#x20AC;? The result is â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Sonoma County Sweet,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; the newest pop-rockfolk-country effort by Danny Sorentino, performing without his usual band the Sorentinos. A nostalgic, surprisingly deepfelt recording, SCS contains some of the warmest and most emotional songwriting Sorentino has undertaken since his 1997 album Family. The song titles read like chapters in a guidebook to Sonoma County, where Sorentino has grown up, raised a family and written hundreds of songs: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Salmon Creek,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Liberty Road,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Gravity Hill,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Inn of the Beginning.â&#x20AC;? Running throughout the music is the inescapable sense that Sorentino has made peace with his youthful ambitions of becoming a world-traveling rock star. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sonoma County Starsâ&#x20AC;? in particular takes a lovingly affectionate look at his own feelings about choosing to stay in Sonoma County all these years. â&#x20AC;&#x153;So high in the sky, looking up and wonderinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; why / You did not travel very far / Star light, star bright, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no place else Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d rather be tonight / Than under these Sonoma County stars.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;I was surprised at how emotional I was writing these songs,â&#x20AC;? Sorentino says, looking forward to a show at the Russian River Brewing Co. in Santa Rosa on Dec. 18. â&#x20AC;&#x153;These places I write about, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re all part of my life. Yeah, I always did assume that someday Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d move to Austin or London or somewhere. But now when I do travel and then come home, I remember why I decided to stay here for the last 30 years. Sonoma County really is my favorite place on earth.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201D;David Templeton

24

12.08.10-12.14.10

THE BOHEMIAN



Massive windows overlooking a bend in the Petaluma River allow plenty of light to enter the expansive offices that house one of the largest sticker companies in the country. On any given month, Mrs. Grossmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sticker Company has up to 500 sticker designs on store shelves worldwide, and on a recent Monday morning, nearly 5,000 miles of stickers wait on spools at the Petaluma headquarters to be packaged and sold. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what happens when youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been at it for so long. Founder Andrea Grossman began making stickers as early as 1972, continually expanding her product line to suit the growing needs of paper crafters. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Stickers appeal to anyone,â&#x20AC;? says Jason Grossman, the founderâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s son and current head of the company. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a cheap form of art. Kids go crazy for them.â&#x20AC;? The family-owned-and-operated digs, combined with a dogsallowed policy, makes for a friendly workplace. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Employees like to stick around,â&#x20AC;? says Grossman, who admits he was fired from various positions at the company while growing up. He returned in 1989 and channeled his passion for manufacturing to keep sticker production to the home base. The team railed against manufacturing overseas, relenting only for products with too much handling to produce domestically. Butterflies, birthdays and Christmas designs rank as consistent favorites year after year, and along with printing colorful creatures, elaborate pirate ships and shiny vegetable stickers, the company branched into labeling 11 years ago. Paragon Label creates detailed tags mostly for local wineries, but â&#x20AC;&#x153;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not just a label to me,â&#x20AC;? says Grossman with pride. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Not everyone can do it.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;? means using high-quality papers, foil, embossing, digital printing and laser-cut designs to create an accessible piece of sticky art. Comfortable on the cutting edge, Mrs. Grossmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s remains the only sticker company in the nation with a laser built specifically to cut out intricate sticker and label designs. The $1 million machine was built by Lasercraft in Santa Rosa. This technology, combined with a workroom of 10 printing presses, allows for the creation of both the iconic red heart sticker (the first design, by Mrs. Grossman herself) and dramatic silhouettes for high-end wine labels. Outside of the online store, where stickers can be ordered direct from a complete list of designs, customers can find Mrs. Grossmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stickers at nearly 4,000 retailers worldwide. Mrs. Grossmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sticker Company, 3810 Cypress Drive, Petaluma. 800.429.4549. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Sara Jane Pohlman

F74A4½BC741445. As long as mankind has been hunting and fishing, jerky has been in existence. By cutting meat into long, thin strips then salting and drying it, humans were able to preserve their catch to tide them over barren winters or sustain them on long treks. Sadly, this once lean, protein-rich staple went the way of the mastodon, and developed into the salty, fatty, super-tough, additive-laden junk food found at quickie marts and truck stops. That is, until Krave Jerky. Leave it to John Sebastiani, a native Sonoman, athlete and member of a family steeped in the traditions and production of good food and wine to reinvigorate a stale market. Inspired by the house-made beef jerky sticks made at Angeloâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Deli in Schellville, Sebastiani and partner Yens Hoj have developed new recipes and methods for making gourmet jerky. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We wanted to do for beef jerky what Ben and Jerryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s did for ice cream,â&#x20AC;? says Sebastiani, a lean, fit man of 40. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re athletes, and we believe in the idea of snacking on healthy food that is protein-rich, low in fat and builds muscle, strength and endurance.â&#x20AC;? The sliced whole meat (all their pork and beef is sourced in California) and natural seasonings boast great nutritional content. The jerky is 97 percent fat-free, contains no trans fats, and is high in iron, zinc, B vitamins and vitamin E. In addition to being healthy and delicious, the array of flavors and the moist, soft texture of Krave jerky distinguishes it from any other on the market. A dual-marinating and drying process retains much more moisture than standard jerky, avoiding the chewy, cardboard texture of other products. And, this being Sonoma County, consumers can naturally pair it with wine. From the sweet pineappleorange beef and smoky grilled teriyaki pork to the savory lemon-garlic turkey and chili-lime beef, the flavors progress from mild to more peppery. Blasts of flavor and heat peak in intensity with curry beef, honey chipotle beef and garlic chili pepper beef. Krave comes in three-ounce packages, trim enough to slide into a stocking, or can be ordered as a sample pack of five flavors chosen by the buyer. Better yet, join or give the gift of the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Jerky of the Month Club,â&#x20AC;? and five packages of Krave will be delivered to the door each month for $25. Krave is widely available at chain and independent markets throughout northern California, and is distributed nationwide and sold online. Krave Jerky, 117 W. Napa St., Ste. C, Sonoma. 707.939.9176. www.kravejerky.com. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Suzanne Daly


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Wolfard lamps, which could look equally at home on TVâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Star Trek as they do at the Hotel Healdsburgâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dry Creek Kitchen Restaurant, have been gracing tables for nearly 40 years. Conceived in 1973 by Jon Wolfard as gift to his wife, Linda, the blown-glass lamps took on a life of their own when friends admired their unique designâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the oil reservoir being incorporated inside the chimney, rather than in the baseâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and wanted one for their own. Word soon spread, and Wolfard lamps were recognized by the Whitney Museum of Fine Arts for their new, innovative design in 1975.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not every day that the average guy gets to walk up to pro golfer John Daly and strike up a conversation, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s certainly not likely to happen at the Masters golf tournament in Augusta, Ga. Across the street from the Masters entrance, however, is a different story, where for the past few years, Dalyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;who hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t qualified for the prestigious tournament recentlyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;has instead opportunistically set up a makeshift merch stand at his RV in a parking lot of a jewelry store on Washington Avenue.

In Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Midsummer Nightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dream, Oberon is the king of the fairies, ruler of a band of mischievous supernatural beings who create havoc, for good and ill, in the lives of human beings. Although in the 1960s, productions of the play featured the otherworldly prankster in flowing ribbons and feathers, in many modern productions of the play the fairies wear leather. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just something about leather that brings out the magic in people.

Distribution grew, and the lamps were soon sold in â&#x20AC;&#x153;every shopping center across the country, at Nature Company stores and in the L.L. Bean catalogue,â&#x20AC;? says current company co-owner Richard Trevethick. Now available online and popular internationally, especially in Sweden and Denmark, these Sebastopol-produced lamps are a perennial favorite. Made of a highly durable borosilicate glass imported from the Czech Republic, each lamp has life literally breathed into it by Trevethick, a veteran glassblower who learned his extraordinary skills working alongside Wolfard since 1975. He acquired the company in 2004, and together with partner Tom Relyea continues to create new designs while maintaining the classic lampâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s high quality.

Well, Daly, for one. The working-class hero of the golf world smokes Marlboros, is sponsored by Hooters and 84 Lumber and has been caught with a flask in his golf bag more times than Tiger Woods has been caught in bed. Guys who dig Daly tend to go for the classic golf stuff, before titanium and treadmills took over and before smoking and drinking and beating the hell out of the ball while wearing grotesque manifestations of day-glo run amok on oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s legs went out of date.

New designs include an arch-shaped lamp, a squared arch and floating lamps. A solid based lamp can be filled with water and flowers as an illuminated centerpiece. Because of the nature of glassblowing, no two lamps are exactly alike, and they come in a variety of sizes. The lamps use 99 percent pure cotton wicks and liquid paraffin oil, which burns cleanly and doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t smoke or smell. Oils are available in a rainbow of colors to accent a roomâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dĂŠcor. Lamps can be purchased online or locally at Corrickâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s (637 Fourth St., Santa Rosa; 707.546.2424), Sebastopol Hardware (660 Gravenstein Hwy. N., Sebastopol; 707.823.7688), Vanderbilt & Co. (1429 Main St., St. Helena; 707.963.1010) and Nowellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Lighting & Antiques (615 Irwin St., San Rafael; 415.332.4933). Wolfard Glassblowing, 6788 Sebastopol Ave., Sebastopol. 888.315.4455. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Suzanne Daly

What does he sell, here in the mecca of golf ? Ugly golf pants, of course. â&#x20AC;&#x153;They been real good to me,â&#x20AC;? Daly says, swerving his arm in mock-swing over to the table covered in high-octane clothes made by Loudmouth Inc. in Sonoma, â&#x20AC;&#x153;and they sure do grab attention.â&#x20AC;? The pants patterns are dizzying, with colors reminiscent of Trix cereal mixed with wardrobe cast-offs from Laugh-In. Other golf fans nearby pick up the high-volume wares and actually laugh. Who in the world would wear this stuff ?

â&#x20AC;&#x153;I just started designing stuff with what I found in old fabric warehouses in Santa Rosa,â&#x20AC;? says Loudmouth founder and classic golf fan Scott Woodworth from his Sonoma home, â&#x20AC;&#x153;and I used to ship the pants out right here, in my office, where me and my kid would print shipping labels at night. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d send out eight or 10 boxes every couple days.â&#x20AC;? An impromptu TV segment from the US Open a few years ago led to wider interest, and earlier this year, the Norwegian curling team took advantage of the sportâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no-dress-code rule and sported argyle Loudmouth pants on a world stage at the Winter Olympics. The pants were a tremendous hit, The Today Show featured them, fans took to their social networks, and now, the â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Norwegian Olympic Curling Teamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pantsâ&#x20AC;? Facebook page has 612,318 fans. All because of the little company in Sonoma started by nostalgia for the gaudy fairway flair of the 1970s. Loudmouth pants run $95, with shorts at $75 and socks at $10. Although Loudmouth is sold online and at hundreds of locations around the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; including John Dalyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s RV during Masters week in Augustaâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;strangely, no golf course or shop in the North Bay is brave enough to carry the Loudmouth line. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t delay, however; the companyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sold out of its entire stock every spring for the last three years.

Which brings us to Oberon Designs. In the North Bay, Oberon is the king of leather and pewter crafts, its name now associated with a line of handmade craft items created right here in the North Bay. Starting in the late 1960s, artist Brendan Smith began developing his skills as a leather crafter, picking up the trade while working at a local saddle shop. Eventually, having opened a small shop in Napa, Smith began selling handmade sandals. He then expanded his line to include belts, handbags and moccasins, ultimately reaching thousands with his own craft booth at the Renaissance Pleasure Faire. Drawn to the detailed craftsmanship and elegant designs, a fan base began to grow. Smithâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s work, often emblazoned with images from the worlds of fantasy and mythology, was seen not just as something utilitarian (a shoe, a belt) but as a piece of art in and of itself. Originally working under the name Walking Foot Leather, Smith founded Oberon Design in the early â&#x20AC;&#x2122;90s, originally focusing on exquisite leather book covers and eventually expanding the line to include pewter bookmarks, barrettes and jewelry. Over two decades later, Oberon Designs can be found all over the world, and are a mainstay in local bookstores and gift shops. Located in Santa Rosa, the company has recently started designing cell-phone sleeves and e-reader covers, bridging handmade craft with new technology. Smith still serves as lead designer, personally crafting the designs for most of the new leather pieces and all of the pewter items. Employing a talented troupe of craftspeople, including Smithâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sister Becca, Oberon has remained smallâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;even though its impact, like Oberon king of the fairies, is immeasurable.

â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Gabe Meline

â&#x20AC;&#x201D;David Templeton

THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

25


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am, from a purely dietary point of view (issues of factory farming and kosher practices aside), is much tastier than it is healthyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s face it, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s part of its appeal. The same could be said of Ham for the Holidays, the effervescently silly Christmas comedy written, starring and directed by Shad Willingham. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Christmas Eve in the winter of 1939, and a freak snowstorm has struck the tiny town of Hamlin, Ga., where the staff of a small radio station is awaiting the arrival of Orson Welles. The radio star has agreed to appear as the voice of God in the stationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s big Christmas radio play, but due to a series of mishaps, Welles is a no-show, and instead of the expected script, the station is delivered fruitcake. With just moments until airtime, aspiring screenwriter and radio actor Dexter (Willingham) quickly adapts his own radio drama, Attack of the Space Robots from Outer Space, which heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d been hoping to impress Welles with. By changing the title of the play to Attack of the Christmas Robots from Outer Space, the station employees are back in business, and the bulk of the playâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;clearly inspired by The Carol Burnett Show and other classic television sketch comedyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;follows the hapless radio crew (including Dodds Delzell, Norman A. Hall, Christmas Collins, Kendall Carol, Jimmy Gagarin and Samson Hood) while they desperately attempt to finish the broadcast as one thing after another keeps going wrong. Adding to the madness is the fact that the stationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s heater has become stuck on high, and as the night proceeds, the room keeps warming up, causing the overheated actors to

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THE BOHEMIAN



start shedding their clothes. What could be more heartwarming than a Christmas play in which everyone ends up in their underwear by the madcap conclusion? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all supremely silly, a bit overdone, but remarkably satisfying, exactly like a big old Christmas ham. Less satisfying, unfortunately, is the Sonoma County Repertory Theaterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new production of Charles Dickensâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Christmas Carol. The Rep has performed Carol in one form or another every December for over a decade. This yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s offering brings us a world premiere script by the usually brilliant Jon Tracy. Starring Joe Winkler (who delivered one of the all-time great performances in the Repâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tuesdays with Morrie), this uncomfortably straightforward, overly academic retelling of the Scrooge story (with Scrooge telling the tale after heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s become a nice person) effectively strips the story of its dramatic tension and wry humor. The direction, by Scott Phillips, is rushed in its pacing, is sometimes confusing (with six actors playing all the parts, dressed in similar clothes, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hard to tell who is who at times), and overall shows little of the invention and creativity for which Phillips is known. Even the great Winkler, as Scrooge, is strangely perfunctory and listless. This is one Carol thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just no fun to listen to. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Ham for the Holidaysâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; runs Thursdayâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Sunday through Dec. 19 in the Studio at Sixth Street Playhouse. Thursdayâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Saturday at 8pm; 2pm matinees, Saturday-Sunday. 56 W. Sixth St., Santa Rosa. $10â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$25. 707.523.4185. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;A Christmas Carolâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; runs Thursdayâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Sunday through Dec. 19 at Sonoma County Repertory Theater. Thursdayâ&#x20AC;&#x201C; Sunday at 8pm; 2pm matinees, Saturdayâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Sunday. 104 N. Main Street, Sebastopol. $20â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$25. 707.823.0177.


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;4C8CB=>F Georgie Henley apparently finds an old pillow and beats it repeatedly with a Wiffle ball bat in â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Narnia.â&#x20AC;&#x2122;

THE BOHEMIAN



Visually stunning â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Narnia: Dawn Treaderâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; heavy on religious allegory By Richard von Busack

B

haped like the end of a trilogy (despite a proposed sequel), The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader heads to its appointed port, loaded to the gunwales with a cargo of moral lessons. The opening sets the stage well. Director Michael Apted includes scenes of the big war in Cambridge, where workmen are tearing down the fences for scrap iron for war material. The elder Pevensies, Peter and Susan, are in America. Left behind are two younger children, Lucy (Georgie Henley) and Edmund (Skandar Keynes), who are billeted with their hateful cousin Eustace. Inundated by an enchanted painting, Lucy, Edmund and Eustace end up bobbing in the sea right next to the Narnian navy vessel containing Prince Caspian, who is investigating the vanishing of seven peers of the realm. Eventually, seven golden swords have to be rescued and placed on the altar of Aslan. The shipmates encounter invisible one-legged giants, a green mist that envelops sacrificial humans and a dragonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s treasure hoard cursing those who steal it. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no secret that C. S. Lewis imbued his writing with Christian tenets, and during the voyage, religious allegory starts to poke out. The earthling children are tempted by such of the seven deadly sins as might lure a child. Lucy wants beauty, Eustace is lured by gold, and Edmund wants power. A child, slowly getting the pictureâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s about straightening up and flying rightâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;might be more perked up by the filmâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s particularly disgusting sea-serpent, studded with claws inside its mucousy-looking mantle.

There are times when the Narnia movies are as good as CGI gets. The animators challenge themselves to pose their legions of creatures under high-noon lighting, instead of disguising the f laws with half-shadows or twilight, and Caspianâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dragon ship is tangible against the Maxfield Parrishâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;like magenta clouds. Another plus is Will Poulter. The bad boy from Son of Rambow plays stinky cousin Eustace, whose shirking and filching provide a welcome counterpoint to the well-bred Pevensies. Full of potential, Poulter is as close to a serious young actor as this series has fielded. For this insallment, the fencing mouse Reepicheep is voiced by Simon Pegg instead of the previous filmsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Eddie Izzard. This time, Reepicheep has more Ronald Colmanâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;style politesse than the last installment. Certainly, the mouse is braver than the Holy Lion himself, who, typically, ducks out on the final fight. If this is indeed the end of the road for the Narnia films, it explains the finale. It doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t blow the ending to mention that Aslan coyly drops a hint of who he really is here, as if we didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t infer it from the previous two films (he was martyred, rose from the dead, is able to heal the sick, etc.). I can remember reading The Voyage of the Dawn Treader in childhood and feeling like Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d been promised a trip to Disneyland, only to be dropped off at Catechism. Even adapted for Hollywood, not much has changed in the storyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mission. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treaderâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; opens in wide release Friday, Dec. 10.


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MIX

December 10, 8-11pm

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MIX discount on Museum membership Enjoy art, music, and cocktails in a recreation of renowned steel sculptor ?e^m\a^k;^gmhgllmn]bh Participatory art project Music by The Easy Leaves

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#### OVER 50 FOUR-STAR REVIEWS USA TODAY CHICAGO SUN-TIMES NEW YORK POST TORONTO STAR VOGUE NEW YORK OBSERVER PEOPLE AMNY SEATTLE TIMES VANCOUVER SUN STAR TIME OUT NY AUSTIN CHRONICLE DENVER POST

Âź8½;;64CH>D64>A642;>>=4H½ Kevin Spacey plays Jack Abramoff in â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Casino Jack,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; showing at Napa Valley Opera Houseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Talk Cinema series Dec. 9. See Film, p40.

'.

AIRPORT STADIUM 12

CINEMA WEST

BOULEVARD CINEMAS 12

READING CINEMAS

ROHNERT PARK STADIUM 16

SUMMERFIELD CINEMAS

Windsor (707) 522-0330 Petaluma (707) 762-7469 Rohnert Park (800) FANDANGO #2720 Santa Rosa (707) 522-0330

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N O R T H B AY M O V I E T I M E S www.sonomamovietimes.com www.marinmovietimes.com www.napamovietimes.com

30

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Hollywood Ending

Seasonal Sammy

Flecked Trees

Sure, Sammy Hagar likes to party down, chug a load of tequila and not drive 55, but when you get right down to it, even the red rocker has a heart. In January of this year, he organized and played a benefit with all proceeds from the $150â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$250 ticket going to a three-year-old recovering from a kidney transplant, and this Saturday, he premieres his new movie, Go There Once, Be There Twice, and turns in an acoustic set with his band the Wabos to benefit Homeward Bound dog rescue and Ritter Center homeless services. See him in a tiny venue on Saturday, Dec. 11, at 142 Throckmorton Theatre, 142 Throckmorton Ave., Mill Valley. 7pm. $100. 415.383.9600.

C6E6

Exactly 20 years ago, Bela Fleck and the Flecktones first appeared at the then-Luther Burbank Center as the hottest new thing in mainstream jazz. If the music didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t blow peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s minds, the group at least had an ace-in-the-hole with slaphappy bassist Victor Wooten, who midway through the show performed a backf lip while playing. Of course, the group has returned to the same venue countless times since, won multiple Grammy awards, found success with multiple solo albums and recorded a holiday record, Jingle All the Way, which itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll pull generously from on Wednesday, Dec. 15, at the Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $40â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$55. 8pm. 707.546.3600.

Choral Majesty

H : 7 6 H I D E D A

As the very first artist to be signed to MySpace Records, a case could be made that Mickey Avalon is a â&#x20AC;&#x153;pioneerâ&#x20AC;? of sorts; a case could also be made that building a career on bad tattoos and songs like â&#x20AC;&#x153;My Dickâ&#x20AC;? isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t very progressive at all. But after a tumultuous year which saw the Hollywood-nightclub rapper fall out with his closest friends and get booed off the stage (twice) opening for the Red Hot Chili Peppers, we should maybe try to be nice to the guy. Thrill to his tales of drugs and prostitutes on Saturday, Dec. 11, at Chrome Lotus. 501 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa. 8:30pm. $30. No phone.

This is the time of year when every high school choir, church choir and community choir hold seasonal concerts and try, basically, to sound like Chanticleer. Probably the greatest living male chorus, the multiple Grammy-winning group has recorded and performed jazz, spirituals, Gregorian chants and more; their annual December holiday tour is a tradition thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s impossible to mockâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; unless you want to make the same old tired jokes about men who can sing really high having no testicles. They bring pure vocal beauty on Sunday, Dec. 12, at the Napa Valley Opera House. 1030 Main St., Napa. 5pm. $30â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$52. 707.226.7372.

More Monitors As the longtime soundman at Hopmonk Tavern in Sebastopol, Andy Kaiser has seen his fair share of line checks, microphone sibilance and the ever-present requests for more vocals in the monitor. But in the hundreds of shows heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worked, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s never played on the stageâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;until now. Kaiser plays guitar in Yeibichai, a dense progressive metal band with Navajo leanings thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just finished recording a debut release in Talmadge near the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas. The professionalsounding self-titled effort is heavy, melodic and full of deadly riffs; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s feted in a release show with Simoom and Goodriddler on Saturday, Dec. 11, at the Hopmonk Tavern. 230 Petaluma Ave., Sebastopol. 9pm. $10. 707.829.7300.

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12.08.10-12.14.10

31


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nightclub & restaurant OPEN AT 4 PM tHURS. - sATURDAY AND ANY DAY A SHOW IS SCHEDULED

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AVAILABLE FOR PRIVATE PARTIES, BANQUETS, FUNDRAISERS AND OUTSIDE PROMOTERS 707.545.5876

9VkZ@do

12/8 7:30 PM SHOW > POP ROCK > ON MIX Chris-Mix Warm Up Party with American Idol season 9 winner

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Breakfast â&#x20AC;˘ Lunch â&#x20AC;˘ Dinner BBQ â&#x20AC;˘ Pasta â&#x20AC;˘ Steak WED 12/8 â&#x20AC;˘ 7:00PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $21 ADV/$23 DOS â&#x20AC;˘ 18+ JAZZ/FUNK/BLUES

CHARLIE HUNTER TRIO SAT 12/11 â&#x20AC;˘ 7:00PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $16 â&#x20AC;˘ 21+ JOHNNY CASH TRIBUTE BAND

CASHâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;D OUT

8:30 PM SHOW > $10 > BLUES ROCK

THE CHRI S DUARTE GROUP

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LEE DEWYZE 12/9

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DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T FORGETâ&#x20AC;ŚWE SERVE FOOD TOO!

WIN TIX

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PLUS LARIATS OF FIRE SUN 12/12 â&#x20AC;˘ 5:30PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $15/$10 WITH 2 CANS â&#x20AC;˘ ALL AGES BLUEGRASS

9:30 PM SHOW > $17/20 > REGGAE

HOLIDAY HOEDOWN â&#x20AC;&#x153;THE BIG GIVE-BACKâ&#x20AC;? WITH

THE

ARANN HARRIS & THE FARM BAND

ABY SS INIAN S + DJ JACQUES

PLUS THE WRONGLERS

12/11 8:30 PM SHOW > $15/20 > POP 5th Annual Chris-Mix with American Idol Season 8 winner

SAT 12/18 â&#x20AC;˘ 7:00PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $23 â&#x20AC;˘ 18+ FOLK/ACOUSTIC/ROOTS MUSIC

KRI S ALLEN

CHRISTMAS JUG BAND

+ Hedley + Days Difference + Pat Jordan Band

WITH SPECIAL GUEST BARRY MELTON FRI 12/31 â&#x20AC;˘ 8:00PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $51 â&#x20AC;˘ 21+

BILL BOWKER'S HOLIDAY BLUES BLOWOUT 12/12 7:00 PM SHOW > $20/23 > BLUES

TOMMY CASTRO

KIM WIL S ON' S BLUE S ALLSTAR S

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PLUS FROBECK SAT 1/1/2011 â&#x20AC;˘ OPEN 9:00AM

NEW YEARâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S DAY

(FROM THE FABULOUS THUNDERBIRDS)

+ the aces 12/13

BRUNCH

7:30 PM SHOW > $20 > BLUES

GENE TAYLOR BLUE S BAND

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ALL DAY BOWL GAMES BLOODY MARY BAR MAKE YOUR OWN $5

WITH DAVE ALVIN 12/16 8:30 PM SHOW > $10 > ROCK 101.7 THE FOX JINGLE BELL BALL

SAT 1/15 â&#x20AC;˘ 7:00PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $25 â&#x20AC;˘ ALL AGES

ROOMFUL OF BLUES

DANKO JONES

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BENEFIT FOR

+ EDISUN + THE DREAMING

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PETALUMA HS MUSIC DEPARTMENT

12/18 8:30 PM SHOW > $15 > ROCK SFARZO GUITAR STRINGS XMAS PARTY

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SAT 1/29 â&#x20AC;˘ 8:45PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $18 â&#x20AC;˘ 21+

WONDERBREAD 5

SWEET LEAF + ROCK SKOOL + THOUGHT VOMIT

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TUE 2/1 â&#x20AC;˘ 7:00PM DOORS â&#x20AC;˘ $17 â&#x20AC;˘ 21+

THE WOOD BROTHERS

all shows are 21+ unless noted

PLUS CARSIE BLANTON

for reservations: 707.545.5876 For All Ages Shows â&#x20AC;˘ No Children Under 10 Allowed

707.545.2343

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the last day saloon

B40A278=6C74BCA44CB5>A<>A45>>C064>574A303

Natalie Cole sings from her latest, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Still Unforgettable,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; at the Wells Fargo Center Dec. 11. See Concerts, above.

23 Petaluma Blvd, Petaluma

707-765-2121

120 5th street @ davis street santa rosa, ca

lastdaysaloon.com

www.mcnears.com

THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

33


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34

12.08.10-12.14.10

THE BOHEMIAN



C741;0BC8=62>=24?C

Dave Alvin and old band mates bring the blues ave Alvin has slung his Stratocaster at just about every dingy little nightclub in Sonoma County over the past 25 years, and with each successive visit, the explosive Downey-bred guitarist shatters even more notions of what six strings and a Twin Reverb are capable of. Now 55, his voice has taken on a baritone aged like fine Syrah, but his guitar playing is continually adolescent, following a determined path while crammed full of energy and ideas. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Alvinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s guitar skills thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be on display this Monday, as he joins names certain to be familiar to his fans at the Last Day Saloon. The Gene Taylor Blues Band features none other than John Bazz and Bill Bateman, whom Alvin played alongside for years in the Blasters, and Taylor himself, who joined the Blasters on keyboards in their later incarnation. Call it a family affair without the family. Locals might remember the uneasy Blasters reunion in 2004 at the Mystic Theatre, when the lingering animosity between brothers Dave and Phil Alvin propelled the show to a sudden endâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and Gene Taylor, the pianist, unwilling to let the show stop there, played boogiewoogie licks onstage for 10 more minutes. It was as good an advertisement as any for Taylorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s current band, even though half the people Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve talked with are still calling it â&#x20AC;&#x153;the Dave Alvin show.â&#x20AC;? The fact itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s with his old Blasters band mates is exciting enough; the fact heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be shredding on straight blues tunes and not his own beautiful originals like â&#x20AC;&#x153;Abilene,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;4th of Julyâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;Nine Volt Heartâ&#x20AC;? is a rare treat. Coupled with Kim Wilson at the venue the night before, it caps a two-day holiday blues bash with the Gene Taylor Blues Band on Monday, Dec. 13, at the Last Day Saloon. 120 Fifth St., Santa Rosa. 7:30pm. $20. 707.545.5876. Gabe Meline

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Saturday, December11th

UFC 124

Big Screen Event â&#x20AC;˘ 7pm

Free Appetizer Buffet â&#x20AC;˘ UFC Fun Gear Giveaway

8:00â&#x20AC;&#x201C;9:00am Jazzercise 9:15â&#x20AC;&#x201C;10:15am Jazzercise

Sun, Dec 12 8:30â&#x20AC;&#x201C;9:30am Jazzercise 10:30â&#x20AC;&#x201C;11:30am Zumba Fitness with Anna 5â&#x20AC;&#x201C;9:30pm DJ Steve Luther Country Western Lessons and Dancing $10 Mon, Dec 13 8:45â&#x20AC;&#x201C;9:45am Jazzercise w/Patti Johnson 5:45â&#x20AC;&#x201C;6:40pm Jazzercise 7â&#x20AC;&#x201C;10pm Scottish Dance

Rock, Blues, Motown & Country Standards

Tues, Dec 14 8:45â&#x20AC;&#x201C;9:45am Jazzercise w/Patti Johnson 5:45â&#x20AC;&#x201C;6:40pm Jazzercise 7:30â&#x20AC;&#x201C;9pm AFRICAN AND WORLD MUSIC DANCE

$20 Free Play Drawings

The Felt Tips Saturday, December 18th â&#x20AC;˘ 9pm Thursday Night KARAOKE â&#x20AC;˘ 8:30pm

Santa Rosaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Social Hall since 1922 1400 W. College Avenue â&#x20AC;˘ Santa Rosa, CA 707.539.5507 â&#x20AC;˘ www.monroe-hall.com

707-485-0700 coyotevalleycasino.com

5 miles North of Ukiah Hwy 101 â&#x20AC;˘ West Rd. Exit

BOBâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S YOUR UNCLE HOWâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S YOUR FATHER?

GOOD NOSH-UP

MEAT & 2 VEG NOW OFFERING A

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Coyote Den

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Traditional

Sunday Roast Lunch POP IN FOR A PINT.

LE ARN ENGLISH.

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IN THE HOLE PUB

116 FIFTH STREET (OLD RAILROAD SQUARE)

www.TH ETOADPUB .c o m

THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

35


:B@60

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A>=10:4A

3>D1;4C7D<1343820C8>= Warren Hellman was once turned down for banjo lessons by Pete Seeger.

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VINTAGE V INTAG NTAGEE EMPOR EMPORIUM EMPORRIUM RIUM An And An ndd Ca Cafe afffee a

Warren Hellman, bluegrassâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; humble hero

Lunch & Dinner Sat & Sun Brunch

Reservations Advised

By Gabe Meline

DI NN E R

Fri

Dec 10

EST. 1941

A ND A

4

ven if the Wronglers were the worst band in the universe, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d still want to go to their show this weekend, worm my way up front and give a standing ovation to every song simply because of the groupâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s frontman, Warren Hellman. Hellman, as many may know, is the lovable billionaire whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s made the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival a reality in San Francisco for over a decade, at no charge whatsoever to the hundreds of thousands of fans who attend the world-famous event every year. Luckily, the Wronglers arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just decent, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re downright good. But donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t try to tell that to Hellman. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We rehearse twice a week,â&#x20AC;? the dry, selfdeprecating 76-year-old says on the phone from his San Francisco office, â&#x20AC;&#x153;and all the rest of the musicians have gotten really good. All but one. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s why I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even introduce myself when weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re playing.â&#x20AC;? Musing that there may be signs (â&#x20AC;&#x153;but not very manyâ&#x20AC;?) that his banjo playing has improved slightly since the Wronglers first filled the opening slot at Hardly Strictly six years ago, Hellman predicts that 10 years from now, he â&#x20AC;&#x153;might be mediocre.â&#x20AC;? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the kind of overly humble assessment that the unfathomably successful investor is known for; he even keeps a low profile at his own festival, mostly because heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s busy

S H OW

TOM RIGNEY & FLAMBEAU

Cajun Orkestra 8:30pm

VOLKER STRIFLER BAND Dec 11 Red Hot Original Blues Sat

8:30pm

FIREWHEEL Dec 12 Roots Rock Sun

4:00pm / In the Rancho Room

Fri

Dec 17 Sat

Dec 18 Sun

Dec 19

Fri

Dec 24

CHROME JOHNSON

Original Rock 8:30pm The Funky Grooves of

VINYL

8:30pm

SANTA & MRS CLAUS TIM CAINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S FAMILY CHRISTMAS SING ALONG

2:00â&#x20AC;&#x201C;4:00pm

4:00â&#x20AC;&#x201C;6:00pm Our 4th Annual GOSPEL CHRISTMAS EVE DINNER SHOW WITH

THE KINGDOM TRAVELERS

6:00pm

Thur

Dec 30 Fri

Dec 31

FAUX NEW YEARâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S EVE WITH ELVIN BISHOP AND FRIENDS

Party Favors and Champage Toast 8:30pm NEW YEARâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S EVE PARTY WITH

THE ZYDECO FLAMES

Party Favors and Champage Toast 9:00pm

415.662.2219

On the Town Square, Nicasio www.ranchonicasio.com

36

12.08.10-12.14.10

THE BOHEMIAN



basking in the glow of performers he still considers idols. An anecdote serves as the perfect example. â&#x20AC;&#x153;One of my partners was on a television show a couple weeks ago,â&#x20AC;? Hellman says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;where it was he and Bill Gates and Warren Buffett. Somebody said, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Does that make you jealous?â&#x20AC;&#x2122; I said, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Noâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; but if he was on a show with Earl Scruggs and Doc Watson, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d really piss me off !â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? In that light, the Wronglers is a dream come true for Hellman. At 28, as a young hotshot at Lehman Brothers, he once called Pete Seeger for banjo lessons and was sternly rebuked by Seegerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s manager for being, in Hellmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s words, â&#x20AC;&#x153;a plutocrat.â&#x20AC;? He gave up the banjo for 30 years. It wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t until he found support from his bluegrass heroes at Hardly Strictly that he picked it up again. Hellman goes on. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I know this sounds too gushy or too starry-eyed, but I think the nicest collection of people Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve met in my life are all these performers. I was in the nastiest, most competitive business that you could imagine for a lot of years.â&#x20AC;? That nasty business usually takes it pretty hard on the chin from the typical bluegrass fan, but the Wronglersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; songs do occasionally call out white-collar criminals. One shows up in â&#x20AC;&#x153;O Isaias,â&#x20AC;? an ode to Hellmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grandfather, who in the early century essentially financed California as we know it: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Henry Fleischmann was head teller of the Hellman bank / He was I.W.â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s adviser of the very highest rank / Stole a million dollars, into debt he sank / Never was arrested, never thrown into the tank.â&#x20AC;? This weekendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Wronglers show is a benefit called â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Big Give Back,â&#x20AC;? organized by local musician Arann Harris. To see Harris and his band live is like watching a rural preacher work a congregation like a plow works the field, although heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sadly been forced to lay low lately. In October, Harris was hit and seriously injured by a drunk driver on the way home from his familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s farm, and the outpouring of support he received from the community while recuperating inspired his focus on the true reason for the season: giving. Thus, none of the showâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s proceeds are going to covering Harrisâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; $8,000 in outstanding medical bills, but instead to COTS homeless shelter and kitchen in Petaluma. Add in Scrooge as host, an uglyChristmas-sweater contest, a raff le with gifts from local stores and a gang of special guests, and Hellmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s looking forward to his first show in the North Bay. â&#x20AC;&#x153;They said to us, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;This is a Christmas show, you oughta do a Christmas song,â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? laughs Hellman. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Of course what theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re expecting, I suppose, is â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Silent Night.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; But weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve written our own song. The opening line is â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Sweet baby Jesus, if only you knew / Just what your birth would lead us all to.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Do you think weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be in trouble in Petaluma with that?â&#x20AC;? Warren Hellman and the Wronglers with Arann Harris and the Farm Band play â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Big Give Backâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; on Sunday, Dec. 12, at the Mystic Theatre. 21 Petaluma Blvd. N., Petaluma. 6:30pm. $10 with two cans of food; $15 otherwise. 707.762.3565.


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Galleries HDCDB68DJCIN

Debi Durst Dave Pokorny John Moran Denise Elia Keith Baker

glaser center 547 Mendocino Ave. Santa Rosa (parking @ 7th St. Garage)

Tickets: $15 adv. $20 at the door Tickets sold online at www.brownpapertickets.com Also at Copperfields Book Stores The Last Record Store

Plus a hilarious short film from monologist

Josh Kornbluth, outrageous performances by the Twisted Christmas All-Ukulele Orchestra and dazzling moves by the high-stepping Holiday Hula Hoop All Stars.

This event is a fundraiser for Redwood Empire Food Bank

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O P O N I C S U PPL I E S

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Mixed media by Eric Engstrom opens Dec. 12 at Gallery Route One. See Openings, adjacent.

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Saturday December 1 1 7:30 pm

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NAPA, CA

Advanced Nutrients, FoxFarm, House & Garden, Cutting Edge, Botanicare, General Hydroponics, Hydro Organics 25-3 Enterprise Court, Napa CA Mon-Fri: 10-6, Sat & Sun: 11-4

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THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

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38

12.08.10-12.14.10

THE BOHEMIAN



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B0=C0F>D;3147>AA85843

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Twisted Christmasâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; returns wilder than ever here are no boughs of holly or turtledoves here, folks. Anything resembling a normal celebration of seasonal spirit is tossed gleefully out the window for this weekendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s eighth annual Twisted Christmas Live. Having grown tired of the same holiday stories hashed out over and over (who else can recite A Christmas Carol nearly verbatim?), a group of local writersâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;including the Bohemianâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s own David Templetonâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;made up some truly odd Christmasthemed tales, booked a stage and founded this tradition in 2003. Since, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grown to include an annual offbeat cast, this year including Will and Debi Durst, Dave Pokorny, John Moran, Reed Martin (of the Reduced Shakespeare Company), Keith Baker and Denise Elia. Somewhat accidentally winding up with a tiki theme, organizers are inviting the audience to wear Hawaiian shirts to complement the all-ukulele orchestra and â&#x20AC;&#x153;Holiday Hula-Hoop All-Stars.â&#x20AC;? Famed funnyman Josh Kornbluth delivers a video tale worthy of his warped mind amid animated corpses, communism and UFOs. Somewhere in the midst of all this, Steve Jaxon, host of Swinginâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; with Sinatra, gets into the seasonal-skewering mix with Last Record Store owner Doug Jayne. When these folks are left to their own devices, things get weird, and not the kind that happens when Grandma has three glasses of sherry and sings â&#x20AC;&#x153;Teenage Dream.â&#x20AC;? According to Templeton, the eccentric madman hosting the show, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be alarmed if a particular skit turns into an island tribe of flesh-hungry cannibals hunting the meaty girth of Santa Claus himself. All this weirdness goes for a worthy cause: the Redwood Empire Food Bank and the Unitarian Universalist Congregation, Santa Rosa, to provide help to the homeless and hungry. Event organizers note that some material might not be appropriate for small children or anyone who takes the well being of St. Nick to heart. We hear he gets a bit of a bashing. Twisted Christmas Live 8 wreaks havoc on Saturday, Dec. 11, at the Glaser Center, 547 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa. 7:30 p.m. $15â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$20. 707.568.5381.

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Sara Jane Pohlman

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Humor and passion light up â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Kid Beowulfâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;

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Jonah Raskin

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F X UT f g\ T a\  G[ X T g e X Fair Game rated R Fri, Sat & Sun, 'HFHPEHUSP Tues, Wed & Thurs, 'HFHPEHUSP

Holiday Extravaganza:

Magic, Music, Dance & The YoYo Man- Tommie Smothers! 2 matinees only: Saturday & Sunday,

Dec 11 & 12, 2:00pm adults $9; children & seniors $7

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s A Wonderful Lifeâ&#x20AC;? (1946) %HQHĂ&#x20AC;WIRU6HEDVWLDQL7KHDWUH)RXQGDWLRQ

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Monday, Dec 20, 7:00pm $8 Tickets 707-996-9756 476 1st St. E. Sonoma, CA www.sebastianitheatre.com

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THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

39


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BOHEMIANCLASSIFIEDS

Placing an Ad

Contacting Us

§ By Phone Call the Department at 707.527.1200 Mon.-Fri., 8:30a.m.5:30p.m.

Bohemian Classifieds 847 5th Street, Santa Rosa, CA 95404 Monday through Friday, 8:30a.m. to 5:30p.m. ph: 707.527.1200

â&#x2C6;&#x161; By Fax Fax your ad to the Classified Department at 707.527.1288

g Remodeling/Repair

Jobs

For Sale

gg Paid In Advance! Make $1,000 a Week mailing brochures from home! Guaranteed Income! FREE Supplies! No experience required. Start Immediately! www.homemailerprogram.net

Help Wanted Receptionist and Massues For new Day Spa in Sebastopol. Need someone to answer phone and book appointments, part time. CMT required for massues postion. 707-823-8540

LAPTOP, Computer, LCD Panel $249, $99, $55- Like New! CRC Computer Repair Center, 3227 Santa Rosa Ave, 95407. FREE checkup, expert laptop repair, tune-up, spyware removal. 9am-5pm, Tues-Sat. 707-528-8340.

4/@E3AB@3AB=@/B7=<A 1=<AB@C1B7=< Â&#x2019;1O`^S\b`g>OW\bW\U Â&#x2019;0O[P]]4Z]]`W\U Â&#x2019;>Zc[PW\U3ZSQb`WQOZ Â&#x2019;;Oa]\`gBWZS1]\Q`SbS Â&#x2019;ASWa[WQ@Sb`]TWbbW\U Â&#x2019;@]]T@S^OW`a Â&#x2019;A]ZO`1]ObW\U Â&#x2019;>`Saac`SEOaVW\U Â&#x2019;5cbbS`1ZSO\W\U Â&#x2019;B`SSB`W[[W\U

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Professional Services

Decks/Fencing

Financial Services

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Get cash for your structured from home on your computer. Quality built to withstand settlement or annuity payNo experience needed! Great time. Free estimates. All type ments. High payouts. Call J.G. pay! FT/part-time. Start Mon. of fencing and gates. Licensed Wentworth. (866) 447-0925. Contractor #904463. Call Now 1-800-568-7047 Rated A+ by the Better 707-321-7210 Business Bureau. (AAN CAN)

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Family Services Adoptions

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Computer Services

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Adult Massage

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Place your classified adult services ad here, Call 707.527.1200 x206 today! Sales@bohemian.com THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

41


HEALTH&WELL-BEING gg g Healing & Bodywork

Serious Massage

For your special bodywork needs - Strong, Thorough, Intuitive. 30 yrs. experience. Colin, CMT (707)823-2990

RELAX! Relaxing massage and bodywork by male massage therapist with 11 yrs experience. 707-542-6856

Massage & Relaxation

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Bearhands4u Massage for men, Sebastopol. Mature, strong, professional. 707/291-3804. Days, evenings, weekends $60/hr. Outcalls available.

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Massage $55 hr • Deep Tissue/Swedish • Sports • Shiatzu • Back Walking • Foot Reflexology • Chair $10/10 min massage • Couples Room

Happy Health Spa

Body Massage • Swedish & Deep Tissue Massage

$30

• Hot Stone Massage

707.765.1879 Open 7 days 9am-10pm

Petaluma Lavender Day Spa

HOLIDAY SPECIAL $50 • NEW Foot Reflexology Treatment • Excellent Massage • Relaxing Body Treatments • Large Finnish Steam Sauna • Easy & Safe Parking

Walk ins Welcome

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FLOWER SPA

Open 7 Days 10am-10pm

707.782.9898

131 Liberty St, Ste. D at Washington St

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Psychics

Psychic Palm and Card Reader

Madame Lisa. Truly gifted adviser for all problems. 827 Santa Rosa Ave. One visit convinces you. Appt. 707-542-9898

Open 7 Days: 10am-10pm

1626 4th St. Santa Rosa 707.526.6888

SPIRITUAL CONNECTIONS TTurn urn H Heads eads with with our our

Finding inspiration and connecting with your community NEW

Holiday Specials $2 25 5

Holi d ay or Holiday or Event Event Make-up Make -u p $7 75 5 Custom Custom Facials Facials$1 15 5B Brow row Wax Wax

Beautiful and private studio in Sebastopol. Lara 707-481-2644

2322 Midway 2322 Midway Drive D r i ve M ontgome g r y Village Village Montgomery SSanta anta R osa Rosa

Blissful 4 Hand Massage

with man and woman, Swedish and Deep Tissue $200.00, William Massage with light stretching 707-548-2187 for men/women Flexible M-F schedule; Incalls Full Body only 60min/$60 | 90min/$75 Please call Leo 707-623-6096 Sensual Massage With a mature, playful CMT. Comfortable incall location near the J.C. in Santa Rosa. Soothing, relaxing, and fun. Visa/MC accepted. Gretchen 707/478-3952.

Grand Opening Special! chair massage with foot bath - $25/30 min

699 Petaluma Blvd. N

A Provider of Pleasure

M4M Massage

Men, women, couples. TLC, massage, Tantra, nurturing mutual touch. William 707-548-2187

Golden Flower Massage Spa

Deep Tissue, Swedish. A sanctuary of pleasure and By CMT Mary 707-228-3275. relaxation. Enjoy the best of Affordable, free parking healing, sensual massage by downtown Santa Rosa. a lovely lady with a caring touch. Quality& class Accept Visa/MC. Tania. C.M.T. 707-477-1766. Santa Rosa.

In a safe, relaxing, comfortGreat Massage able space by a “mature”, By Joe, CMT. Relaxing hot tub compatible, easy-going and pool available. Will do gentleman! Since 1991 I`ve outcalls. 707-228-6883. provided pleasure to women, couples. Good virtues. PAIN/STRESS RELIEF men, NW Santa Rosa, Jimmy, Professional male massage (C) 707-799-4467 or therapist; strong, deep (L) 707-527-9497. healing bodywork. 1 hr / $50, 1 1/2 hr $65. 707-536-1516 Guerneville www.CompleteBodyBalance.

Man of Your Dreams

Great Massage Therapy CHRISTMAS SPECIAL

707-575-3223 707 -575 -3223 gift g ift c certificates e r t i f i c a te s available a va i l a b l e

Call 707.527.1200 to advertise in the Health & Well Being Today!

Compassion Kadampa Buddhist Meditation Center Offers ongoing daily and evening classes for Adults and Kids Everyone is welcome. Bookstore open Fri & Sat 10am - 2pm. Check the online calendar www.meditateinsantarosa.org or call 707-477-2264 for more info. New Location - 436 Larkfield Center, Santa Rosa

The Journey Center: A Place for Transformation

Resources for your spiritual journey (ancient prayer/meditation practices, workshops/retreats, spiritual direction, art gallery, reading room, bodywork). 1601 Fourth Street, Santa Rosa. www.journeycenter.org 707.578.2121

Mahakaruna Buddhist Meditation Center Offers ongoing introductory and advanced classes. Weds at noon, Tues & Weds evenings 7:30-8:45pm Prayers for World Peace Sun - 10:30 - 11:45am Everyone welcome 304 Petaluma Blvd., North -Petaluma www.meditationinnorcal.org

A Safe Place To Be Real Holistic tantric masseuse. Unhurried, private, heartfelt. Monday thru Saturday. NEW CLIENT DISCOUNT. 707-793-2232.

open 10-10, 7 days

525 Ross St, Santa Rosa

707-591-8899

Beit Ayin is proud to present: “Ani to Ayin: Self Transformation from Ego to Expansiveness”

The Jewish Meditation Retreat of Sonoma County Led by the outstanding Rabbis Lavey Derby and Ethan Franzel, powerful sacred chant music by the Beit Ayin Band, OPEN TO ALL and includes yoga, nature hikes, drum circles, and delicious organic food. To register, and for more info www.beitayin.org or beitayin@pacbell.net

December 10-12, 2010 (with extended day of retreat through Dec 13th)

Walker Creek Ranch, Petaluma

NOW OPEN Therapeutic Massage Center Body Massage $55/hr Open 7 days 9-10pm

707.578.3088 42

12.08.10-12.14.10

Foot Massage $19.99/45 min 2460 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa THE BOHEMIAN

Illumination: An invitation to Come and Be... to Come and See Begin the New Year with a guided weekend retreat including silence, solitude, group experiences, outdoor beauty, and individual conversations with intern spiritual directors. Fri, 1/7 - Sun, 1/9, 707-578-2121, www.journeycenter.org

Share your organization’s inspiration with over 123,000 Bohemian Readers monthly!

Phone: 707.527.1200 email: sales@bohemian.com


THE BOHEMIAN

12.08.10-12.14.10

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SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM

1901 CLEVELAND AVE SUITE B, Santa Rosa

Medical Marijuana Certifications

Golden Star Grafix

A & A Kitchens

Relapse Doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Mean Failure

Full exam. Low cost. No charge if you do not qualify. Santa Rosa. Authentication 24/7. 707-591-4088.

Need a quality designer? Business cards, brochures, flyers, posters, digital collage, cd covers, photographic restoration & collages general marketing materials. Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924

Need commercial kitchen space? Our spot will accomodate all your culinary needs. Stop lookinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and start cookinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;! Call us in St Helena at 707.968.9474,

Santa Rosa Treatment Program can help. (707) 576 0818

A Musical Hawaiian Christmas with George Lovato at cdbaby.com/cd/georgelovato - Sound clips and more Available for mp3 downloads

We do all DMV. Free pick up- running or not (restrictions apply). Live operators- 7 days! Help the Polly Klaas Foundation provide safety information and assist families in bringing kids home safely.

â&#x20AC;&#x2122;T BE ASHAMED N O D

T.H. Bead Design & Repair Quality beads, sterling silver clasps, etc. Custome necklaces, earings and bracelets for you or that someone special. Jewlery repair available also, no soldering. 707.696.9812, tiffany_beadsandpieces@yahoo.com

Fun Fitness, dance into shape with the Nia Technique martial arts, dance arts, healing arts all in one awesome workout. Groove Studio 707.539.6261 Integrative approaches for vitality and healing. Carlisle Holland DO. 707.824.8764. holonomicinstitute.com

Consult counsel experienced in defending medical marijuana & cannabis cultivation cases. (707) 829-0215. (415) 489-0420. www.omarfigueroa.com. Stanford Law School graduate.

Creative Light Productions Professional photographer & videographer for weddings, parties, special events. Call award winning David Ludwig-Local: (707) 527-6004 Toll Free: (800) 942-8433 www.creativelightproductions.com

SKIRT CHASER VINTAGE â&#x20AC;&#x201D; BUY, SELL, TRADE 707-546-4021 208 Davis Street, RR Square

707.664.0178 boomburke@hotmail.com

1st two weeks free!

FOOD ALLERGIES? CHRONIC FATIGUE?

OMAR FIGUEROA CANNABIS LAWYER

Photography by Paul Burke

Donate Your Auto 800.380.5257

Green Earth Catering

TO

Y! A GO HOME THIS HOLID

Organic and Earth friendly foods and supplies Scott Goree - Entertainment coordinator and business manager 707.795.7358 home, 707.479.5481 cell redgore23@aol.com

Santa Rosa Treatment Program can help you! We provide treatment for: Oxycontin, Vicodin and heroin using replacement medications. We also treat methamphetamine and alcohol dependence.

Stony Point Rd.

POSTERS â&#x20AC;˘ T-SHIRTS â&#x20AC;˘ CD COVERS FLYERS â&#x20AC;˘ PHOTOGRAPHIC RESTORATION

general marketing materials

SUBUTEX/SUBOXONE available for Safe Oxycontin, Vicodin, Other Opiate Withdrawal! Confidential Program. (707) 576 1919

Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924

schaumann1@earthlink.net

Angie Spalding www.beadsandpieces.com/ 1320 Commerce Street Suite C, Petaluma, CA 94954 (800)652-3237 ext. 5112

Santa Rosa Plumbing Water Conservation Experts. Friendly, Honest Service. Licensed, Bonded and Insured. License #871026

tankless water heaters, high efficiency toilets recirculation, general plumbing needs. Call 707.528.8228

Meth and Alcohol Treatment that allows you to keep your day job! Santa Rosa Treatment Program can help.(707) 576-0818.

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Dutton Ave.

Corby Auto Row

Rohnert Park

HWY 101

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Hearn Rd.

707-576-0818 www.srtp.net

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Storage Master Self Storage

Bellevue

1901 Cleveland Ave Suite B, Santa Rosa

Todd Rd.

SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM

Q UALITY G RAPHIC D ESIGN

Standish Ave

W. Robles

â&#x20AC;˘ Providing Treatment since 1984 â&#x20AC;˘ Confidentiality assured

3205 Dutton Avenue

Santa Rosa

1435 Sebastopol Road

3 FOR FREE Prepay first

3 months, get the next month free

707-546-0000 707-578-3299

Locally Owned & Operated


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