Metro Parent - April 2020

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CHEW ON THIS: Why kids chomp on stuff that isn’t food • 4 SPRING THINGS: Fashion blogger mama style musts SWEET ESCAPE: Seasonal chocolates to make you smile • LOVELY LOCKS: A mom’s daughter helped her love her hair

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Spring 2 section

Viva Vegan!

Plant-based diets are picking up with families

STAFF

APRIL

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CEO & PUBLISHER Alexis Bourkoulas

Content

COO & CONTENT DIRECTOR Julia Elliott EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Tamara L. O’Shaughnessy AUDIENCE DEVELOPMENT DIRECTOR Kim Kovelle MANAGING EDITOR Hillary Bird SENIOR EDITOR Stacey Winconek DIGITAL EDITOR Christina Clark CREATIVE DIRECTOR Kelly Buren

Inside

SENIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER Lindsey Lawson PHOTOGRAPHER AND GRAPHIC DESIGNER Lauren Jeziorski CONTRIBUTORS Courtney Conover, Sherri Kolade, Brent Mosser, Lori Orlinsky, Amanda Rahn, Kari Zaffarano

Features

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PRINTER Calev Systems Miami Springs, Florida

Plant Power

As the food trend heats up, more families are exploring and adopting a plant-based diet. Plus, five great spots in Metro Detroit for vegan fare.

Departments Get to know local gem Birmingham Chocolate.

Meet Olympic hopeful Flyinbrian. Mr. E. Takes on TV. Try some virtual science lessons.

The New Reality

Getting through the day with work, busy kids and social distancing during the coronavirus pandemic

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14 VOICE

One mom battled her natural hair until she found someone watching her every move.

Special Needs 2020

Four things you need to know right now that will bring more smiles to people with special needs.

Sales / Administrative

11 PULSE

15 YOU

Simple fashion trends that work for every mom.

16 WHY

The answer to why kids chew on things.

Read the cover story on Page 20

40 DILEMMA

Should Jewish kids paint Easter eggs?

SENIOR MEDIA STRATEGISTS Kevin Hayes, Linda Holland, Mary Beth Wells SALES OPERATIONS MANAGER Jess Chrobak MEDIA PLANNER Eric Gerber ACCOUNTING MANAGER Mary Guthrie SALES AND DISTRIBUTION COORDINATOR Meaghan Smith

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On the Cover

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Avian, 6, Pontiac Photo by Lauren Jeziorski APRIL 2020

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18 Camp Guide 2020 38 Schools and Preschools

Online Note

22041 Woodward Ave., Ferndale, MI 48220 248-398-3400 248-399-4215 (fax) MetroParent.com

Roseville Community Schools Celebrates Success in Special Education Through a multidisciplinary approach, staff, students and parents work together as a family to help students grow and thrive in special education programs.

By Claire Charlton

A

ll parents want their children to succeed in school. But when a child needs academic, emotional or behavioral support in the form of special education, parents want to be extra certain their school and district are equipped and ready.

“Parents want to know their kids are going to progress and get the correct support to be successful,” says Kevin Gabriel, resource room teacher and teacher consultant at Steenland Elementary School in the Roseville Community Schools district. “This is different for every child, and we recognize that every child is an individual.”

At Roseville Community Schools, robust special education is not new.

The district first piloted a program for students with learning disabilities in the 1960s, and has a long history of meeting the needs of Specially Designed Instruction (SDI), according to Teresa Tomala, special education director. SDI encompasses many areas of need and is determined through a student’s Individualized Education Plan (IEP).

“A student’s needs may be in the area of academics, social-emotional or behavioral,” Tomala explains. “SDI may mean a student needs therapy in speech and language, social-emotional skills taught by a school social worker or academic instruction provided in a resource room.”

A team-based approach What makes Roseville so unique is its multidisciplinary approach to special education. A wide range of expertise within its staff means students have access to individualized support. “One student may need a little boost to be able to make progress in the general education curriculum, while another may have a higher level of needs that include a program

tailored to their disability,” Tomala says.

The staff participates continually in professional development in order to best support students.

Roseville is the home of Macomb County’s Deaf and Hard of Hearing Total Communication Program for students in preschool through eighth grade. “This program is unique because students require sign language as their primary method of communication,” Tomala says.

Several speech and language therapists

in Roseville Community Schools are part of a Macomb County-wide assistive technology team and can help determine precisely what assistive technology might best help an individual student participate fully in class. “They may benefit from low-tech support such as a pencil grip or need a higher level of support, an augmentive communication device, for example. We strive to help the student participate in the least restrictive environment,” Tomala says.

Preparing differently-abled students for the wider world For older students, special education prepares for life after high school, whether that means college, instruction in a trade or participation in another post-secondary program. Roseville begins planning with students in ninth grade and partners with Michigan Rehabilitation Services to offer students the opportunity to work summer jobs, when appropriate.

Support for students at Roseville Community Schools can also come from partnerships with community organizations, such as Michigan Alliance for Families, ARC of Macomb, Macomb Community Mental Health and, of course, the Macomb Intermediate School District, among others.

“We recognize that our students’ needs often stretch beyond the school day, but if these needs are not met, there is an impact on their achievement. Our students need to see and learn from oth-

ers to gain an understanding of resources available,” Tomala says, offering the real-world example of how to navigate daily through the community. “Using SMART transportation can be a valuable asset to our students when they become adults to assist in employment and fulfilling basic needs.”

Trips out into the wider world offer students in the cognitively impaired program the chance to learn life skills, Gabriel says. “Taking kids to Kroger, for example, and showing them basic activities like shopping is something that maybe they won’t get at home but is very beneficial to development,” he says.

Like a close-knit family Roseville Community Schools is a family-oriented educational community where parents want to get involved and work with staff to support their children individually. This close-knit, supportive environment celebrates progress, no matter how small.

“We have a student with autism and he’s had some great breakthroughs in the last couple of weeks,” Gabriel shares. “I work a lot with academics, and maybe a student is struggling to grasp a concept. I work with students until they have their ah-ha moment. That builds self-confidence in kids and it’s neat to see their successes.”

Ultimately, Roseville Community Schools is successful in special education because the staff is invested in its students and cares about their progress.

“We are working for one collective goal of success for the student, whatever the child needs,” Gabriel says. “This is a really great district and a really great department. We have a lot of people who care a lot about kids. This is where we want to be and that really shows.”

Content brought to you by Roseville Community Schools. For more information, visit rosevillepride.org.

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EDITOR’S PICKS • A Parent’s Guide to TikTok • What to Do If Your Kid Sees You Having Sex • Problematic Disney+ Movies You Need to Talk to Your Kid About Before You Watch Them • Creepster Bunnies: 10 of the Scariest Easter Bunnies on the Internet • 50 Things You Need to Do With Your Teens Before They Graduate

MetroParent.com/APRIL

NOTE SPEAK YOUR MIND Tell us what you think of this month’s issue Email editor@metroparent.com.

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The Best Laid Plans

BY JULIA ELLIOTT

pril. That was the month we chose. It gave us just enough time to plan a light redesign of Metro Parent. Out with some old departments (Bye-bye, What Counts!). In with some new (Hello, Pulse!). We wanted to make a few tweaks to the calendar you love — including the name. We wanted to add some content just for “You” beyond your role as parent. And we couldn’t wait for the issue to get printed and hit stands for you to see what we came up with. But, well, you know what they say about the best laid plans? Life can have other ideas.

If you’re reading this issue, you know that it’s not in the traditional print format we’re all used to. In fact, for the first time since Metro Parent was founded in 1986, there is no print issue. Why waste the trees to print a magazine that no one will be around to pick up? Instead, we offer this digital version and have sent it out to our loyal readers where they are this month — at home, safely avoiding COVID-19.

April was also supposed to be the month we hosted our Living With Autism Workshop. Clearly, that’s not happening either.

But this is everyone’s April, right? We all had plans: birthday parties, school days, work retreats, trips to Costco. OK. We’re still doing that, but now it feels like some sort of dystopian mission where we’re wearing homemade face masks

and gloves as we set out to score toilet paper and antibacterial wipes. This April is like no other.

But dashed plans don’t matter. The only thing that matters is the health of you and your loved ones. Even if you lost your job, as hard as that is.

Or lost income from a partial furlough or layoff.

That will be challenging, humbling and stressful.

But it still doesn’t matter. As long as you and your family are safe, it will be OK. So, do us a favor, and take care of yourselves.

Not just your family — you, too. Take some “me” time in some corner of your house and flip through this digital edition of our April issue. Let me know what you think.

Oh, and if you’re looking for ideas on how to occupy, educate and entertain them while you’re all under house arrest, we’ve turned our events calendar into a virtual events calendar. Now you can find some of the cool classes, webinars and streaming sing-alongs available as a digital diversion to break up your day in one place. Head to MetroParent.com/Calendar to see what’s going on today.

And remember: We’ve got even more resources at MetroParent.com to help you navigate the hardest job in the world in one of the hardest months any of us have ever experienced. Looking for something in particular? Email me at julia@ metroparent.com. We’re here for you.

Metro Parent is published by Zoe Communications Group. Articles and advertisements in Metro Parent do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the magazine. We do not assume responsibility for statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. The acceptance of advertising by Metro Parent does not constitute an endorsement of the products, services or information being advertised. We do not knowingly present any product or service which is fraudulent or misleading. ©2020 Zoe Communications Group. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any way without written permission of the publisher.

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GUIDE TO

COLLEGE PLANNING

GUIDE TO

HELPING YOUR AGING PARENTS

ITH ME

NT A L

FAM

LE W OP E P

Sean Penn The actor, who has struggled with his emotions for decades, attended anger management classes. .

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APRIL 2020

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ESS LN IL

OU S

OPENING MINDS ENDING STIGMA

A YEAR-LONG SERIES PROMOTING MENTAL ILLNESS AWARENESS AND UNDERSTANDING

Teaching Children to Embrace Their Emotions Is it OK to cry? A local expert weighs in on why it’s necessary for children – and their parents – to express their feelings. By Pam Houghton

H

ow nice if we only ever experienced joy. But since life is full of ups and downs, there are times we’re likely to feel anger, sadness and frustration. As challenging as these feelings can be for grown-ups, they are more so for children who haven’t learned to handle them.

Which is why it’s important that they do. But how do you teach kids to embrace their feelings? And is it OK to cry?

“It is absolutely OK to cry, and it’s necessary for a parent to verbalize and express a wide range of emotional experiences,” says Reema Beri, Ph.D., a licensed clinical psychologist with Great Lakes Psychology Group in Novi. Kids learn from what we do, “so the way we experience our emotions has a huge impact on how they experience them.”

But how we respond to their emotions is equally important. “There’s a famous relationship expert, John Gottman, who found that parents generally interact with their kids and their kids’ emotions in four different ways,” Beri adds.

Dismissive parents tend to ignore or trivialize feelings; disapproving parents are more likely to judge or criticize emotions rather than support them; laissez-faire parents accept their child’s emotions, “but that’s where it stops. There’s nothing beyond that point,” Beri says.

Then there’s the parent who serves as more of an emotional coach – the most effective of the four types, Beri says. Parents who master emotional coaching “accept all of their kids’ feelings, including the uncomfortable ones.” They also provide empathy, understanding and validation, actions that fuel a child’s problem-solving ability.

There are other bonuses to emotional coaching, Beri adds – kids often have

Brought to you by

greater emotional intelligence, and better attention spans, grades and relationship skills. Also, their physiological response to stress is stronger, so they are better at selfsoothing when feeling troubled.

The other three styles aren’t as successful at producing such favorable results; in fact, they are more likely to cause behavior problems, lower self-esteem and difficulty making friends, Beri says. “So essentially, if we want to raise our kids to be well adjusted children and adults, who live successfully through difficult experiences, these are the building blocks.”

Here, Beri offers a few tips to improve your emotional coaching.

Be aware of your children’s emotions.

“We need to be really present when we’re with them, and tuned in to what they are experiencing.”

Help them label what the emotions are. “Young children haven’t learned to identify their emotions yet and that’s a skill, so we need to label their emotions for them. So, for instance: a parent can say, ‘you seem really angry that your brother came and tore down your Lego structure.’ ” Empathize and validate. “Allow them to express whatever the feelings are. So if there’s anger or sadness or tears, that’s OK. ‘I understand how you can be so angry that your brother tore down the Legos. I would be pretty angry, too.’ ” Guide them through problem-solving.

“We can say, ‘I understand you were really angry when your brother came and knocked down your Lego structure, and I would be too. Also, we do not throw Legos in this house. So the next time you are feeling angry, what are some things you can do to help yourself instead of throwing the Legos?’”

With older kids, don’t jump to problem solving right away. Teens want an unconditional listener. “After they know you are just going to listen, then they might ask for problem-solving help.”

Separate the behavior from the emotions. “A lot of times misbehavior can accompany difficult emotions. The part we are disapproving is the behavior, not the children themselves.”

In her practice, Beri often works with families who are in crisis, with parents who wonder: What if the situation is really terrible and there is no problem-solving to be done? Or there is, but I still feel what I feel?

“I like to coach parents that we still have to teach kids about emotions, and I really like the analogy of using a wave. So I’ll tell kids: imagine you are standing in the wave pool, and right now, there is no wave. You know the waves are coming but you don’t know how to handle the waves.

You could turn around and pretend they aren’t coming, but there’s another one there, and another and another. Or you could fight your way through but that just gets exhausting.

“What we want to do is ride the wave, right? That is our option and the one that makes the most sense. And so just like waves, emotions start small, then they increase, and then they peak. But the best part is, at least with the difficult ones, is that they go away, too; they recede, they don’t last forever. So if we can teach kids that that’s what emotions are, that they are like waves, they come, we have to deal with them, that they are going to increase and get to a really intense point, but then they are going to go down, then we can teach them to tolerate the emotions they are experiencing.”

MANAGING OUR FEELINGS

I

t can take time for a child to reach a point where he’s able to say, “I am mad because …” Expressing emotions in a constructive way is something that children have to learn. And that’s where parents come in.

As our children’s first teachers, it is our job to provide them with the tools they need to express feelings of sadness, anger and frustration. Acting as emotional coaches for our children isn’t easy, but it’s important. After all, emotions can both positively and negatively impact a child’s life, so it’s integral to help them identify and manage their feelings from early on.

That’s why we addressed this issue in this edition of Opening Minds, Ending Stigma. We hope you’ll read and share this advice with other families.

Victor Hicks II CFP®, AIF® Trustee, Flinn Foundation

Find more information at FlinnFoundation.org.

MP EXPERT

KAUFMAN CHILDREN’S CENTER

Can I Help My Q: How Child Develop Better Handwriting Skills?

AMY HENGSTEBECK, OTRL

A:

Many children struggle with handwriting, which is an important foundational skill for educational success. They are often challenged with forming letters, sizing letters appropriately, and ensuring consistent spacing between letters and words. Here are some important basics for successful handwriting to try at home.

Grasp: A child’s grasp should be developed by 3 1/2 years old. Give your child small or broken crayons so they are encouraged to use only their thumb and first two fingers, which develops strength for a tripod grasp. Activities using pegboards, clothespins, and lacing will also promote this grasp.

Postural stability: A stable base of support is a must for proper handwriting as children with weak core muscles have trouble sitting in a chair and attending. Laying over a therapy ball and doing sit-ups or bouncing on the ball will help to “wake up” and strengthen core muscles. Yoga poses also help promote core strength and postural control.

Animal walks, such as mimicking a crab or a bear, as well as wheelbarrow walking, help strengthen postural, shoulder and hand muscles.

Inching forward in a seated position on a scooter board or using their hands to pull themselves on the board helps strengthen core muscles, hands, and shoulders. Give your child a vertical surface to write on, such as paper taped to a wall, to help promote shoulder stability.

Hand strength: Many children struggle with weak muscles that fatigue easily. This can lead to decreased control and frustration with handwriting. TheraPutty is a resistive material that helps strengthen hands. Hide small objects in the putty for your child to find. Ask them to pull and cut the putty as resistive activities. Having a child bear weight on flat hands helps encourage development of intrinsic hand muscles used for handwriting. Wheelbarrow walking, crawling through tunnels, and completing activities in hands-and-knees position help promote this, as well.

Spatial awareness: Children may write their name out of order or take up an entire sheet of paper. Use boxes to provide a boundary for the words or letters and bring sizing down to age-appropriate levels.

Use puffy paint or glue to provide a tactile cue for the baseline of their letters and Popsicle sticks to measure the spaces between words. Make handwriting practice fun and pair it with other activities. Multiple repetitions and practice will help to increase hand strength, control and success with handwriting.

BROUGHT TO YOU BY

Visit kidspeech.com for more information on their speech, language, sensory motor and social connections services.

10 APRIL 2020

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In Real Life PULSE

Sweet on Springtime

BY AMANDA RAHN

Surprise your kids this Easter — or just give spring a big sweet hello — by going all out in the chocolate department.

A local gem with an ace supply?

Birmingham Chocolate, which offers up colorful seasonal favorites. Be warned, though: It’s super busy leading up to the April 12 holiday.

The main draw at this shop is “the rarity of local, handmade chocolate, in an open kitchen concept where you’re actually able to see your chocolate being made,” says chocolate ambassador (yes, that’s actually her title!) Elle Cabot.

BIRMINGHAM CHOCOLATE 1728 W. Maple Road 9 a.m.-6 p.m. Monday-Friday and 10 a.m.-3 p.m. birminghamchocolate.com

PICTURE-PERFECT PICKS Spruce up that basket with chocolate ambassador Elle Cabot’s faves. Nab new springtime bonbon flavors ($1.50 each), color-spattered chocolate eggs (three for $15) and Easter bunnies in different chocolate outfits ($10-$18 for standard sizes; a 3-footer is $600).

Or, for $7, get a 6- to 7-inch solid chocolate carrot.

“The carrot is back by popular demand,” Cabot says. “It’s the envy of all Easter bunnies.”

MetroParent.com/APRIL From Sanders Chocolate in Clinton Township to JoJo’s Treats & Sweets in Plymouth to Zingerman’s Candy Manufactory in Ann Arbor, browse even more local chocolatiers to get your fix.

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APRIL 2020

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IRL: PULSE

SCIENCE TO THE RESCUE

BY KIM KOVELLE

Need a few at-home projects to do? Dig into 24 Virtual Camp episodes from Metro Parent and the Michigan Science Center at MetroParent.com/April. You’ll find STEM-tastic experiment videos, PDF guides and quizzes. A few we love ...

Photo by Chris Laske

SQUISHY CIRCUITS: Make some dough and make it glow! This project brings electricity to life.

Watch Brian Fly

Photo by Nicole Grynaviski

BY AMANDA RAHN

ROCK CANDY: Hard candy really isn’t all that hard to make. Create a delicious custom batch.

Fifteen-year-old Brian Rice started snowboarding in the ditch near his house at age 4. Soon, he could be the first African American snowboarder in the Olympics.

“I love snowboarding because it’s so unique and different from every other sport I’ve done,” says Rice,

who grew up in Farmington but now lives and trains in Colorado.

Rice, who goes by Flyinbrian, says making it to the 2022 Winter Olympics would be a dream come true if he can inspire other kids like him to try snowboarding.

To those kids, he says: “No matter

what challenges come, you always find a way to overcome them because at the end of the day, it’ll all be worth it because you’re doing what you love.”

Supporters can help offset his competitions and training costs at gofundme.com/support-snowboarder-flyinbrian-olympic-dreams.

MR. E TAKES ON TV

BY AMANDA RAHN

ICE BALLOON: Learning about water chemistry is cool as heck with our chilly experiment.

SLIME!: It’s goopy, gross and gobs of science fun. Seriously, what’s not to love?

12 APRIL 2020

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Emmanuel Smith’s 3-year-old daughter begs to watch one of her favorite shows before bedtime some nights — The Mr. E Show, starring her father.

“I’m like, ‘You know that’s me, right?’” says Smith, the dean of culture at Detroit’s University Prep Ellen Thompson and dad of four.

The YouTube children’s show is the first funded by the city of Detroit and stars Smith in a Mr. Rogers-type role, helping kids use their imagination on adventures around Detroit.

“Children’s shows have always been close to my heart because of the impact they have,” he says. “The children’s shows I watched when I was younger really hit me in a very integral spot of who I am.”

Watch The Mr. E Show on the city of Detroit’s YouTube channel.

Learn more about his reading and math mixtapes at mreinthed. wixsite.com/mysite.

TO KEEP YOUR CHILD ACTIVE AND HEALTHY, THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX Through an initiative called Project Play, the Aspen Institute and its partners are working to boost the numbers of kids engaged in healthy, active sports and play. We share their parent tips for reimagining kid-focused play. By Claire Charlton

P

icture a 7-year old in

a baseball jersey sitting before a mic at a press conference announcing his “retirement” from sports.

It seems like a meme, yet parents who struggle to keep their kids engaged in sports – and physical activity in general – get it.

But the child who quits after just two practices isn’t necessarily being lazy or difficult. She may actually be telling you something about the state of organized sports.

“When my son was 5, he had an awful experience with T-ball. It was too competitive, coaches were arguing, fans were yelling at umpires, and he played outfield with no rotation. He got bored and retired a month into the season, and only played one more season of team sports again,” says Jon Solomon, father of two and editorial director with the Aspen Institute Sports & Society Program’s Project Play initiative.

“Project Play started in 2013 to try to reimagine youth sports through health and inclusion. We want every child to have the opportunity to access sports regardless of ZIP code or ability,” Solomon says. To help parents encourage their kids to return to the playground, Project Play offers eight strategies. We share some of them here.

Ask kids what they want.

Parents blame video games for children’s inactivity, yet kids crave the user-focused experience they get with electronic games.Video gaming is inclusive to all, with no coaches and no parents critiquing every move, Solomon says. “We know that kids’ No. 1 reason for playing sports is to have fun,” he says. Parents can empower themselves to incorporate kids’ voices into sports programming to make it more kid-focused – even if it means that winning isn’t at the top of the wish list.

Reintroduce free play. Legitimate safety concerns and overscheduling edge out free play, the time when kids experience physical, mental and social-emotional growth. Solomon encourages parents to coordinate free play, either at home with neighborhood kids or in a park. Or, be a good role model. “Go outside with your kids to shoot hoops or play catch.

Go for a walk or a jog, and your kids will pick it up,” he says.

Encourage sport sampling. Early specialization comes from the parent’s chase for the athletic scholarship, Solomon says. “There’s nothing wrong with trying to do your best and aim for your dreams, but at what cost? At increasingly younger ages, kids are picking, or are forced to pick, a sport they will play year-round,” he says.

Using the same muscles in the same body movements increases the risk of injury and burnout. With physical literacy as an alternate goal, parents can be active themselves. “The most active kids have active parents. Try more activities yourself and your kids are likely to try them, too.”

Revitalize in-town leagues.

Competitive travel sports for young children have grown in recent years. “Travel sports have become commercialized and popular,” Solomon says. “Parents should understand what they are getting into.”

Time committed to practice and travel may not lead to equal playing time, which can be demoralizing for young kids. A balance between recreational and competitive offerings requires investment in the quality of house or recreation teams, as well as discouraging the stigma of playing in local leagues just for fun.

Think small. In communities where parents serve as coaches and sports league administrators, they can work to leverage resources for all kids. “Transportation is an issue for a lot of kids who can’t access play spaces or where they need to go for games,” Solomon says.

“Even one mile can be far, so we need to be thinking about other ways to utilize our communities creatively. Shared-use agreements between sports providers and schools, which are great resources

because they have facilities, can work.”

Small-sided soccer games can be played on mini-pitches or on basketball or tennis courts, for example.

Design for development. When parents recognize that children are not miniature adults and are still growing into their bodies and athletic abilities, they better understand the value of inclusion.

“If you are a coach of middle school or younger kids, don’t cut kids from the team,” Solomon suggests. “That can have a direct impact on whether they play sports and it reduces opportunities for them. Project Play is a big believer of equal playing time for kids under the age of 12.”

Train all coaches. Because coaches play a role in whether a child continues to play, it’s important that they are trained in safety, concussion awareness, sports skills and effective motivational techniques, Solomon notes. “Coaches have a role in developing personal growth, not just about sports, but confidence, self-esteem, sportsmanship, character, the value of academics and teamwork.”

Emphasize prevention. Concussions are among the safety concerns parents have regarding sports, which is why policies and rule changes that eliminate or greatly reduce head contact for kids 12 and under should be introduced.

Content brought to you by the Ralph C. Wilson, Jr. Foundation.

To learn more visit about Project Play visit ProjectPlay.us and ProjectPlaySEMI.org.

IRL: VOICE

Y

I Hated My Curls …

Until I Had a Child With Hair Like Mine

BY COURTNEY CONOVER

ou name it, and I’ve done it in the name of preserving my blowout.

I’ve sprinted across grocery store parking lots, nearly pulling a hamstring. I’ve nixed plans to take my kids to the water park. And don’t even get me started on all the times I’ve cut short an outing at the park because I could simply feel an uptick in the dew point.

One might dismiss the above as simply what women do in the name of beauty. But the lengths I have gone to make my curly hair straight are no laughing matter.

There is nothing funny about spending my entire life shunning my natural hair texture. And there’s certainly nothing pleasurable about enduring scalp burns — and the subsequent scabbing — that results from the use of chemical hair straighteners.

To be clear, straight hair isn’t the enemy; it’s lovely, in fact. The problem, though, is when the pursuit of straight hair rules your life. There is a difference between straightening your hair because you want to and doing it because you believe it is necessary to be presentable, or worse yet, you know no alternative.

Consider this: I was an otherwise fully functioning adult who literally had no idea how to style or maintain my hair in its naturally curly state.

From the time I was knee-high to a grasshopper, Sunday afternoons were spent sitting still as my mother blow-dried and braided my hair. When I hit the teen years, I wanted my hair even straighter, so she used a hot comb, too. And, before long, that didn’t get my hair straight enough. Enter the chemical perms.

As the late poet Maya Angelou so beautifully stated, “When you know better, you do better.” But there were few alternatives back then. In the ’80s and ’90s, drug stores didn’t have entire aisles dedicated to serving the natural hair community. There was no natural hair community. YouTube didn’t exist, and no one had any idea what a hair tutorial was.

The gross irony, however, is that this entire notion

was turned on its ear with the birth of my daughter, who was born with thick, dark, perfectly clumped curls. From day one, I instilled in Kennedy that her curls were beautiful — and she agreed. I prided myself in caring for — and never straightening — her curls, despite my need to incessantly straighten mine.

And herein lies the problem.

When I straightened my strands during my lengthy blowout sessions, I noticed how Kennedy, then 2, studied my every move. I could see the wheels in her head beginning to churn: If you think my curls are so pretty, why do you straighten yours? The day Kennedy would call me hypocritical was heading toward me like a freight train.

I decided, at age 38, that I would stop straightening my hair.

But imagine the horror I experienced when I washed my hair and it wouldn’t curl.

Come to find out, all the years of applying excessive direct heat had permanently altered my curl pattern. Instead of “big chopping”— cutting off all my hair at once — I chose to trim my hair over 17 months. On my 40th birthday, the last of my damaged ends were cut off.

I’ve been on this journey for nearly five years now, and I can say, unequivocally without hesitation, that going curly is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

Here’s what I’ve learned: First, I should have done this sooner. And secondly, the Earth will not fall off its axis if my curls don’t behave the way I want them to— in fact, sometimes they’re prettier that way.

And here’s what I’m most grateful for: By teaching my daughter to love her wildly curly hair, I’ve finally learned to do the same.

Courtney Conover is a freelance writer, certified yoga instructor and curly hair enthusiast who lives in Wayne with her husband, Scott, a former Detroit Lions offensive lineman, and their two children, Scotty, 8, and Kennedy, 6.

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“I could see the wheels in her head beginning to churn: If you think my curls are so pretty, why do you straighten yours?”

IRL: YOU

COZY JUMPSUIT: This might be my go-to piece for spring and even summer. A quick piece you can just throw on, be comfy and look put together. What more could you want?

FLATS: Another piece that is easy to wear and can dress up any outfit.

Just slip them on and head out the door! They come in so many different colors and styles and can make any outfit go from plain to wow.

Spring Fever Our look often takes a backseat to the mini me in the literal backseat.

Spring is a great time to change that with a few cute essentials that not only make your life a little easier, but add a little boost of awesomeness you deserve.

We turned to fashion blogger and mom Andrea Kucinski for a few easy options that won’t break the bank and could work for every mom For more inspiration, follow her on Instagram at @andreakucinski.

DENIM JACKET: The essential spring staple in my opinion! As a mom, we’re always on the go and this piece is perfect to throw over anything. I mean literally anything. It can even dress up your basic leggings and tee.

WHITE DENIM: A perfect piece to give you a polished look, whether you pair it with a basic tee or a dressy blouse.

3

PODCASTS TO TRY

1 NAKED BEAUTY Brooke DeVard Ozaydinli brings together women she admires for talk about beauty trends, wellness and selfcare. But don’t expect outright product pitches and how-to tips; this podcast is about motivating you to think.

2 HAPPIER WITH GRETCHEN RUBIN Need a little happy in your life? Check out Happier with Gretchen Rubin as the happiness guru/author discusses, with her sister Elizabeth Craft, how we can all make our lives happier, healthier, more productive and more creative.

3 ZEN PARENTING RADIO PODCAST Hanging out with husband/wife team Cathy and Todd Adams – and parents of three girls – is like spending some time with chill friends, with some good advice you can actually use on being a little more zen in your life and kinder to yourself.

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IRL: WHY

Got a WHY question?

Email us at editor@ metroparent.com.

Why Do Kids Chew on Everything?

BY LORI ORLINSKY

D

o you constantly find yourself telling your kids to stop biting their shirt sleeves or chewing on their pencils or even their hair? If so, you aren’t alone.

Many kids will chew everything in sight, even without realizing they are doing it. So what is it about chewing? Why do kids do it past the age where it is deemed socially acceptable, and is it something parents should be concerned about?

WHY KIDS CHEW

While chewing behaviors are considered normal and developmentally appropriate in infants and toddlers, when it comes to school-aged kids, it can raise a red flag for parents that something is amiss. Some of reasons for chewing may include anxiety, stress, sensory issues, boredom and general habit.

“The brain is wired such that the mouth is an important place for interacting with the world, and chewing is a form of that,” says Dr. Peter J. Smith, chair of the American Association of Pediatrics Section on Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics and associate professor in Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics at The University of Chicago.

“Much like foodies turn to foods with different textures in adulthood,

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kids often experiment by putting different things in their mouth.”

Lindsey Biel, occupational therapist and co-author of Raising a Sensory Smart Child, says like anything kids do, chewing is a matter of degree.

“It’s within the range of so-called normal to chew on a shirt cuff or nibble on cuticles or nails now and then but when it is more extreme — clothing is wet, cuticles are ripped and bloody — it does indeed become a concern.”

THE IMPLICATIONS OF CHEWING

From an overall health perspective, most pediatricians agree that chewing isn’t something parents should be overly concerned about.

However, for younger kids, Dr. Banu Kumar, chief of pediatric hospital medicine at the Children’s Hospital of Michigan, worries about choking hazards and increased risk of sickness due to germs.

“We always worry about choking hazards when kids are chewing on tiny objects,” Kumar says. “These objects are dirty and not sterile, so the health risk of getting germs inside their bodies increase.”

Additionally, if chewing continues beyond when the permanent teeth begin to come in, dental prob-

“The brain is wired such that the mouth is an important place for lems may also occur, says Dr. Mina Chung, pediatric dentist at Chicagoland’s Grove Dental Associates.

“From a dental perspective, chewing habits can contribute to having negative effects on teeth and jaw formation,” Chung says. “Early identification and diagnosis of such behaviors can allow for therapeutic intervention and prevention.”

havior or the behavior will manifest into other negative behavior.”

WHAT NOT TO DO

HELPING KIDS WHO CHEW

Veronica Ursetto, owner and therapist at Integrative Perspectives Counseling and Consulting PC in Chicago, says it is important for parents to work with their child’s pediatrician about why their child is exhibiting the chewing behavior rather than labeling the child as a “chewer” and the behavior as negative.

“When we shame and punish our children, we send the message that the child is bad,” Ursetto says. “In reality, the likelihood is shaming a child will either exacerbate the be-

interacting with the world and chewing is a form of that.”

Parents looking for other ways to regulate chewing behavior can offer their children age-appropriate alternatives that are not choking hazards, such as crunchy foods or drinking through a straw. Additionally, there are a wealth of safe toys made for children who like to chew.

“No matter why kids do it, chewing is a self-regulatory behavior that can be very calming to kids,” Kumar says. “It is important to meet with your child’s pediatrician to get to the root of the cause, and from there, figure out how to best address it.”

ART BY BRENT MOSSER

Camp Guide 2020

18 APRIL 2020

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Camp Guide 2020

METROPARENT.COM

APRIL 2020

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Plant power As the food trend heats up, more families are exploring and adopting a plant-based diet

BY LORI ORLINSKY

W

hat happened in Amber Burosh’s bedroom is playing out across the country in one scenario or another.

Her 4-year-old daughter, Delaney, snuck in.

“She was scarred for life and told me the next day she was never eating meat again,” Burosh says.

Burosh was watching a documentary on food that triggered their move to plant-based eating.

“She convinced her sibling to do it too, and the rest is history for our family.”

This year, plant-based eating is all the rage and its popularity is predicted to continue growing for families. In fact, a new study from Nielsen reveals that 40 percent of Americans are now making an effort to eat plant-based foods, like the Burosh family.

While there is no set definition of a plant-based diet, this way of eating focuses on consuming plant-derived whole foods that are unrefined and minimally processed. This means no dairy, poultry or meat products, and no artificial sugars besides what’s naturally found in fruits. The aim is to eat foods in their healthiest and most natural state. Fruits, vegetables, beans, legumes, whole grains and nuts are the dietary staples.

While research suggests that plant-based eating may reduce the risk of certain cancers and diseases, including heart disease and diabetes, and lead to overall weight management, many families are turning to the plant-based concept to make a lighter environmental footprint. Shifting to more plant-based foods, they feel, is essential to combating climate change, soil, air and water pollution, and other problems caused by industrial livestock production.

Another reason: more families are turning to plant-based diets

as children become more conscious that animals must be killed in order to obtain meat.

Even fast food chains and celebrities have cashed in on the eating trend. Earlier this year, Starbucks introduced a new line of plant-based drinks to its permanent menu, and Dunkin’ Donuts, KFC and Burger King recently added plant-based sandwiches to their offerings. And Kim Kardashian made headlines everywhere when she posted photos of her family’s pantry to Instagram, revealing that the Kardashian-West clan eats an entirely plant-based diet.

“A whole food plant diet can be ideal for families with children,” says Cardiologist Dr. Joel Kahn, author of The Plant Based Solution. “Eating the colorful rainbow of fruits, vegetables, whole grains and legumes can provide all the macronutrients of healthy plant fats, complex carbohydrates, and plant proteins while providing more than usual micronutrients.”

Kahn, who is based in Detroit, says plant diets can fuel school and athletic performance, while lowering exposure to antibiotics, hormones and pesticides from animal agriculture.

Turned on by these benefits, Penny Shack started to raise her son, Hamilton, on a fully plant-based diet when he started eating at 7 months old. However, she quickly found out he wasn’t satiated, as after 30 minutes of eating, he was fussy.

Thinking he had an absorption problem, Shack and her husband took Hamilton to the pediatrician, who suggested adding animal proteins into his diet to help him feel full.

“I wanted my son to thrive no matter what kind of a diet it looked like,” said Shack, who still considers their family plant-based despite eating animal proteins a few times a week. “We do teach him about food, so I am confident he will make a decision about the future of his diet when he is older.”

According to Dr. David Friedman, author of Food Sanity: How to Eat in a World of Fads and Fiction, Americans have been misled about the need for protein derived from meat.

“How does an elephant grow to 10,000 pounds by eating nothing but plant food?” Friedman says.

“Elephants couldn’t grow so big and strong if plants weren’t loaded with enough protein to supply their muscles.”

According to the American

healthy because they eat packaged ‘vegan approved’ food that is loaded with sugar, excessive salt, artificial dyes and chemical preservatives.”

Molly Laatsch, chef/owner of the Chicagoland-based Latch Catering, says she is getting more requests from families who want a plantbased menu. As such, she finds herself featuring beans, mushrooms and sweet potatoes in a variety of ways to help them transition into this new way of eating.

“Eating the colorful rainbow of fruits, vegetables, whole grains and legumes can provide all the macronutrients of healthy plant fats, complex carbohydrates, and plant proteins while providing more than usual micronutrients.”

Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics, well-planned plant-based diets are appropriate for individuals during all stages of the life cycle. Additionally, the American Academy of Pediatrics has stated that children can thrive on diets that contain little or no animal products.

Friedman cautions families that often people confuse the term “vegan” diet with “plant-based” diet, leading to the belief that both of these diets are synonymous with healthy eating. However, vegan foods can include highly processed products stripped of nutrients and loaded with unwanted additives.

Examples of foods that fall into this category include Oreos, Sour Patch Kids, and certain flavors of Doritos.

“Be careful and do your research,” Friedman says. “I know many vegans that are overweight and un-

“These ingredients fit well in a variety of flavor profiles and are hearty enough to be filling and satisfying,” Laatsch says.

When making the switch to plant-based, Laatsch encourages families to be creative.

“Most people do pasta or rice, and that can be really boring,” she says.

“Consider mushroom enchiladas, sweet potato burritos or bok choy ramen. The options really are endless.”

TIPS FOR STARTING A PLANT-BASED LIFESTYLE FOR YOUR FAMILY: · Consult with your child’s pediatrician before making any dietary changes. Ask about supplementing with a vitamin, such as B12. · Start slowly by instituting a METROPARENT.COM

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Plant power DETROIT SIDEBAR:

‘Meatless Monday’ dinner and build from there. · Create healthy swaps for dairy.

“There are so many options that taste good, if not better, than dairy,” says Friedman, who suggests parents try making a plant-based mac and cheese sauce for kids, which is made from a blend of cashews, carrots and potatoes. · Add plant protein to all dishes to keep you fuller for longer. Examples include chickpeas, green peas and quinoa. · Include children in meal planning, grocery shopping and meal time activities (helping out in the kitchen, setting the table, etc.).

· Challenge yourself by recreating your family’s favorite dishes in plant-based form. · Make food fun for kids by cutting it into fun shapes, adding color with fruits and vegetables, or serving finger foods. · Make healthy desserts, like avocado chocolate pudding and brownies made with black beans or chickpeas. · Consider subscribing to plantbased meal prep boxes such as Splendid Spoon and Green Chef. · Connect with other plant-based families by joining an active plantbased social media community with discussions, recipe inspirations, etc.

411 Plant-based: Avoids all meat, dairy and artificial sugars and instead focuses on plant-derived whole foods that are unrefined and minimally processed.

Vegan: Avoids all animal products, including meat, eggs and dairy. Doctors warn families to avoid junk and processed foods that are “vegan friendly” but not healthy.

Vegetarian: Avoids eating meat, but some people consume products that come from animals such as eggs and dairy.

Pescatarian: Avoids meat, but eats fish.

5 places to eat vegan food 5 places to eat vegan food in Metro Detroit in Chicago

Whetheryou’re you’reentirely entirelyvegan, vegan,have haveananallergy allergyororsimply simplytrying tryingtotoreduce reduce Whether your meat and dairy intake, these area spots serve up grub that will your meat and dairy intake, these Chicago-area spots serve up grub that please everyone in the family. will please everyone in the family.

PLANTHROPIE URBAN VEGAN new dessert, cheese zero-proof barwant has been created by a mom If This you’re craving seafood or and chicken, but don’t to stray from being determinedUrban to put Vegan only the best and purest her son’s belly plant-based, has your back.

Theingredients menu is fullinof tasty Thai and the bellies of allallfamilies a plant-based diet.

Families will love dishes that replicate of youreating favorite meaty flavors, from Spicy “Seathe cakes (think nutrition-packed balls of yum), all food” Soup and with bliss soy fiballs sh and shrimp to “Chicken” energy Satay with charbroiled minus the sugar crash.

Parents and older kids will love the plant-based marinated soy chicken. If your kids aren’t fans of international fare, try cheeses while the bar offand ers mocktails, sparkling tea and cold brews.

Crispy “Chicken” Nuggets French fries.

Pierce St., Birmingham 1601-1603135 Montrose Ave., Chicago GREENSPACE & GO TRUE FOOD KITCHEN Thismenu fast casual plant-based smoothies, breakfast The at Truetakeout Food isfeatures seasonal, so you canbowls, be sure you’re getting the and sandos.

Founded by cardiologist Dr. Joel Kahn, his wifecompletely and son, it fofreshest, in-season produce available. The selections aren’t cusesbut on whole foods,are, notlike junkthe food.

Families with allergies willwith especially vegan, many items Unbeatable Burger (topped vegan like the selection of gluten-free, nut-free options. mayo), Creamy Tomato Soup (made with coconut cream) and Butternut 2867 Woodward Squash Pizza (includes vegan almond ricotta).

The restaurantAve., also Royal has a Oak

kids menu that’s allergy-friendly to the delight of parents everywhere.

DETROIT VEGAN SOUL 1 W. Erie St., Chicago Get plant-based comfort food made with fresh ingredients. Think soul food likeBONES mac-n-cheese, BBQ and tofu “catfish,” plus spaghetti and meatballs NO BEACH CLUB and lots of sandwichaschoices.

No Bones originated a food truck, as evidenced by the casual, but Two Even Detroit locations: flavorful West Coast-style eats and brightly colored decor. hardcore 8029 Agnes St. and 19614 Grand River seafood lovers will gladly gobble up No Bones’ Fish n Chips, made fromAve.

Panko-breaded tofu and Coastal Chowder with potatoes and oyster mushSEVA The restaurant also serves up a tasty brunch menu that features rooms.

For families whoand wantTropical a casual place Toast. for a night out, Seva is a great option breakfast nachos French with its completely vegetarian menu, vegan gluten-free bread onChicago its sand1943 W. North Ave., wiches and kids’ menu that gives kids choices on their food. The weekly specials have featured vegan THE CHICAGO HOUSE OF ‘ZAice cream!

Yes, vegan pizza is a thing (even in one of the pizza capitals ofTwo the locations: world), 2541 Jackson Ave., Ann Arbor, and 66 E. Forest Detroit and it’s totally delicious. Deep dish lovers, you can still get your Ave., fix here.

The House of ‘Za offers a double decker pie filled with cashew mozzaHAPPY PLATES marinara. You can also choose from a full menu of rella and homemade Home cooking delivered right to your please.toAshely Page, a different crusts and ingredients; from thedoor? plainYes “cheese” Italian sausage Berkley mom, has eaten a plant-based diet for a decade.

She started seitan. If you’d rather dine on pasta, top your dish with cashew Alfredo her businesses afterinshe became a mom tetrazzini and friends her for sauce or indulge lasagna, “chicken” or constantly veggie-fiedasked Bolognese. food advice. She considers her business a one-stop-shop forSt., plant-based 1939 W. Byron Chicago living with meal planning and community rolled into one. Now, she is deliveringNOW family-sized meals to homes in Metro Detroit to make meals even VEGAN easier inside for families.

Tucked the Chicago French Market food hall, you’ll find this gem of a soul food restaurant. Not only is the entire menu hereeathappyplates.com vegan, but it’s also free of refined sugars and flours. Popular items include mac and cheese, tofu quiche, jerk “chicken” and buffalo tofu. Regulars highly recommend the baked goods selection — especially the cinnamon rolls.

131Rua N. Clinton Chicago MetroParent.com/APRIL Read more about FrancisSt., Oshana, the mom behind Planthropie, and her family’s plant-based experience.

By Natalie Dal Pra

22 APRIL 2020

METROPARENT.COM

DEVELOPMENTAL MILESTONES IN CHILDREN A HENRY FORD HEALTH SYSTEM

PEDIATRICIAN WEIGHS IN ON FINE AND GROSS MOTOR SKILLS, PLUS OTHER DEVELOPMENTAL MILESTONES.

I

“ s my child developing normally?”

It’s a question that plagues parents from the moment a baby is born. To consider whether a child is developing normally, pediatricians look at milestones, or important activities that children should be able to do by a particular age.

“We have a general blueprint of how most kids develop and grow,” says pediatric primary care physician Mollie Blanchard-Brown, M.D., who practices at Henry Ford Medical Center - Bloomfield Township. “It’s not hard and fast, more of a guideline, but we want to catch delays early.”

Blanchard-Brown explains that doctors look at gross motor skills, which refer to abilities that involve the large muscles of the arms, legs and torso. A few of these milestones include rolling over, sitting up, and walking.

Doctors also look at fine motor skills, which are movements using small muscles in the fingers, hands and forearms. Examples of these fine motor skills are grasping and holding small objects. Speech is another milestone that doctors will evaluate for any developmental delay.

“It’s important to come to all well-child visits,” Blanchard-Brown says. In addition to the reassurance that your child is growing and developing well, you can have your questions answered. “Parents tend

MOLLIE BLANCHARDBROWN, M.D.

to compare one child to another,” she says. At the well-child visits, normal variances or true delays can be determined. “Delays detected early mean a chance for early intervention and getting the child on track,” she says.

As far as gross motor skills, a typically developing 1-yearold child can sit alone and unsupported, pull to stand, and stand holding onto furniture, Blanchard-Brown says.

Fine motor skills for a 1-yearold child include the ability to pick things up with thumb and forefinger (pincer grasp) and put objects into the mouth. Also, eye contact, and smiling are important milestones for social development.

If a developmental lag is noticed, there are things parents can do to help their child catch up.

“There are many opportunities for children to learn and strengthen their growing bodies,” explains Blanchard-Brown. “For example, reading more books, talking to your child and labeling environment can be helpful if there are delays in speech. Or putting the child down and playing with them on the floor if there’s a delay in walking.”

There are many resources for children who may have a developmental delay, she says, and the earlier you seek help, the better.

“Early intervention means prompt treatment.”

To find a doctor or pediatrician at Henry Ford, visit henryford.com/findadoc or call 1-800-HENRYFORD (436-7936).

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METROPARENT.COM/COVID19 Digital events, homeschooling help, streaming fun, old-school crafts, recipes, science experiments and heaps more — we’re here for you! Visit us online for more to do and learn.

THE NEW REALITY Getting through the day with work, busy kids and social distancing during the coronavirus pandemic

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S

chool is canceled and so are the events you planned to attend.

The kids are restless and probably a little sad missing their friends and routines. You’ve been trying to juggle working from home, helping the kids keep up with their studies, child care and your own worries about the coronavirus, not to mention when you are ever going to find toilet paper on the store shelves. Date night and self-care aren’t even on your radar.

We are right there with you. So, we’ve rounded up some ideas to help you through this ‘new normal’ until life gets back on track again. When will that be? Even the experts have been disagreeing, but we’ve got you covered until then at MetroParent.com/COVID19.

IF THE KIDS GET RESTLESS….

Use your ‘village’ If kids can learn online, the whole family can connect online. “Play” board games via Skype or FaceTime, set up your book club to “meet” in a chatroom or have dinner on a call with relatives across the country.

Speaking of board games Teach your kids the games you loved when you were kids. Is your 5-yearold ready to learn Cat’s Cradle yet?

Pull out Candy Land and let older kids change the rules to make it harder.

Bring the outdoors, indoors For littles, don’t hesitate to bring some of the outdoor toys inside. Set up the kiddie slide in your living room (into a pile of pillows, whee!) or ride the Big Wheels in the basement, if you can.

Sweat it out Get off the couch and just move. (That includes you, Mom and Dad!) Turn on your favorite jam and have a dance party or get your blood pumping by exercising.

Cheryl Eugenio

IF THE KIDS NEED A SCREEN BREAK …

Podcasts are a great option. They can be enjoyed in the car, while doing chores and as a family before bed.

Animal Sound Safari Discover the weird and wacky histories humans have with animals, as each episode of Animal Sound Safari is jam-packed with cool stories, kooky facts and “pawsome” puns.

Bedtime Explorers Designed to soothe kids to sleep, mindfulness coach Amy Taylor Kabbaz guides kids on wonderful, imaginative journeys to magical places, visiting animals with super powers, and meeting up with some very friendly dinosaurs.

But Why: A Podcast for Curious Kids Are your kids constantly asking you questions that you struggle to answer? Tune into this NPR podcast that tackles topics large and small about the world around us.

Dream Big How do you make your childhood dreams a reality? Join 7-year-old Eva Karpman and her mom Olga as they interview world-class performers about how they made their dreams come true.

Smash, Boom, Best This is a debate show for kids and families.

Every episode takes two cool things, smashes them together and lets you decide which is best.

METROPARENT.COM

Lori Orlinsky

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THE NEW REALITY IF YOU ARE TIRED OF COOKING DINNER …

Most local food establishments are still available for families not wanting to cook or wanting to keep their money local. Here are a few ways to get it to come to you.

DoorDash: In addition to local, independent businesses, DoorDash also delivers from chain and fast food restaurants. There is a $0 delivery fee on the first order for new customers.

GrubHub/Seamless: Enter your address and GrubHub or Seamless will find restaurants close to you for delivery.

Some restaurants have a minimum purchase requirement for delivery.

Postmates: Order for pickup or delivery from Postmates, including 7-Eleven, Walgreens and non-traditional restaurants. Delivery fees vary by location, but using a code SAVE100 will allow new customers free delivery for their first $100 in fees.

Uber Eats: Just like Uber car service will pick you up, Uber Eats will pick up your food and bring it to you. Watch for deals on the app, like $0 fees from some restaurants or money back for spending over a threshold amount (i.e. $3 back if you spend $15).

Direct from Restaurant: If you want to know what’s open in your area, find a restaurant close to you on a new website, Dining at a Distance, created during the pandemic for restaurants to advertise their options. You can also check a restaurant’s social media for daily specials and deals.

METROPARENT.COM/COVID19 Digital events, homeschooling help, streaming fun, old-school crafts, recipes, science experiments and heaps more — we’re here for you! Visit us online for loads more to do and learn.

Hillary Bird

IF THE KIDS ARE BEGGING FOR A PLAY DATE …

With these apps, have kids play board games, taking turns virtually on the board, read to each other from the same book, create art together (each creates half a picture and put it together on screen when done) or have a scavenger hunt around each child’s house.

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Caribu This video-calling app immediately offered free, unlimited access as schools began shutting down. Kids can read books from the 1,000plus titles together, play games and color during a video call.

Messenger Kids This app allows kids 6-12 to video chat and message friends and family, with challenges, drawings and filters.

Plus, they can use it to collaborate on homework with a study group or talk about group projects.

Marco Polo Just like the game Marco Polo, with your kids calling out Marco to see who will answer “Polo,” kids can reach out to friends and family with this video chat app easily.

Netflix Party Your older kids can still hang out with their friends virtually (without the need of social media apps). Netflix Party is a great option. Download the Google Chrome extension for free and they can watch their favorite movies and shows at the same time no matter the distance. It also has group chat window to let you message each other.

Tamara L. O’Shaughnessy

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Signs Your Teen is Struggling With Substance Abuse While opioid use is on the rise, marijuana and alcohol are still top substances of choice for teenagers.

Here, the director of the Macomb County Office of Substance Abuse details the top signs to look for.

By Stacey Winconek

T

he teen years are tough, and as teens are discovering themselves, they can sometimes pick up some dangerous habits – like substance use.

“These days, some of the most commonly used substances with teens include marijuana and alcohol,” says Helen Klingert, Director of the Macomb County Office of Substance Abuse, which is a division of Macomb County Community Mental Health.

While opioid use is increasing, marijuana and alcohol are the substances of choice among teens today, and use typically ramps up around 14 to 16 years old.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, half of ninth through 12th grade students have reported using marijuana, while two-thirds of 12th graders have tried alcohol and 2 in 10 reported using prescription medicine without a prescription.

It’s a huge problem – one that can have major consequences long-term. If you think your teen could be struggling with substance abuse, read on for some signs and tips.

Behavioral signs

“Many times you may see that there has been a change in their mood or the way

that they’re presenting, or you may see a change in their social situation,” Klingert says.

Are your teen’s friends changing? Are they hanging out with different people than they did in the past?

Depending on the substance, she says, you can see vastly different behaviors.

In some cases, an individual under the influence might speak louder, seem happier than normal or be very outspoken. On the flipside, a teen under the influence of other substances can become quiet or withdrawn, or even keep to themselves in their room at home.

Pattern changes or other significant changes could be signs, as well.

“Any one sign or symptom of itself doesn’t mean it’s substance use. It could mean many other things,” she says, but look at those factors together and keep a watchful eye.

Physical signs

The most obvious flags to look out for include smelling alcohol on your teen’s breath or smelling marijuana on his or her clothes. However, there are a number of additional signs to watch for including slurred speech or a change in a voice tone.

“Other physical signs could be blood-

shot or glassy eyes or change in the size of the pupil,” Klingert says – and because of that, sometimes they might avoid eye contact.

They may seem drowsy, uncoordinated or clumsy. If the issue is ongoing, a teen might experience weight loss or even changes in hygiene habits – not paying as much attention to personal hygiene.

Keep an eye out for environmental clues, too, including if money goes missing in the home, if you see drug paraphernalia – including pipes or baggies – or if alcohol bottles go missing from your home.

Addressing the issue

Talking early and often about substance use is key, Klingert says.

“I think having a conversation is always important, and one that expresses concern,” she says. “It’s a very difficult time. Teens are trying to find their place within their social network or find ways to deal with the struggles that they are experiencing, so coming from a place of concern as a parent is really important – and trying to engage the youth in that communication with you, so it’s just not a one-sided lecture.”

Have that conversation multiple times

and let children know what you think and feel about substance use. This lays a foundation for what the norm is for your family.

“Adolescents still look at their parents as role models,” she says. “Maybe not as obviously as when they were younger, but setting the family values is important.”

Teach children how to say “no” in certain situations, and ask them questions like, “What would you do if someone offered you a beer?” Asking specific questions and even role playing gives kids a chance to think through what they’d do.

If your teen does, in fact, have a substance use disorder, Klingert suggests contacting the Macomb County Community Mental Health Access Center at 586948-0222. While this is open to Macomb County residents only, Klingert notes that each county has an access center that can help families. These centers can connect families to early intervention services, outpatient treatment counseling, residential treatment services and more.

“Calling and getting help is very important, because the sooner you address an issue, the easier it is to treat,” she says. “If we let things go too long, it just gets more difficult and has more potential consequences the longer use goes on.”

Content brought to you by Macomb County Community Mental Health, Office of Substance Abuse. For more information, visit mccmh.net.

SPECIAL NEEDS SNippets

Spring 2020

HOPE IN THE WOODS What was once a school nestled in trees will soon be a brand-new autism hub.

The Hope Network Center for Autism in Livonia is moving into the former location of Ladywood High School this summer.

Hope Network, one of the state’s largest nonprofit organizations, is expanding with its fifth center. It will offer applied behavioral analysis, speech and occupational therapy, diagnostics and more for diagnosed children 18 months to 21 years old. Transportation will be available within a five-mile radius of the city or discussed case-by-case, Executive Director Michelle O’Connor says.

Nearby Madonna University will house

the center before it opens; construction starts in June.

O’Connor says one of the goals is to provide treatment and intervention at naturalistic settings like at a high school, so patients can practice program skills they learn.

“One of our goals is to meet needs our families have,” O’Connor says.

Youth will also enjoy the former school’s expansive outdoor space, including a football field, courtyard and garden beds.

“A lot of times treatment and interventions look like play,” she says. “We use outdoor space on a daily basis, weather permitting.

We will also have scheduled access to one of the gyms.”

HOPE NETWORK 14680 Newburgh Road, Livonia | hopenetwork.org

WIGS 4 KIDS’ NEW DIGS Maggie Varney has a vision that kids with cancer can find solace at her new state-ofthe-art building, Maggie’s Wigs 4 Kids Wellness Center & Salon.

Opening this spring, the new St. Clair Shores center boasts amenities for kids’ social, psycho-

logical, mental and physical well-being. Children ages 3-18 are seen for free. Services include expanded programming to incorporate nutrition and fitness activities, a teahouse, end-of-chemo and graduation parties, and opportunities for volunteerism. Makeup and skin/nail care services are also available.

“I’ve always known since I worked with the kids that just providing wigs for them is not enough,” says Varney, CEO of the St. Clair

Shores nonprofit Wigs 4 Kids. “They needed so much more, and it took me about a year to develop the program here and it took off. We keep growing and getting more families.”

The large location also sells treats and beverages for donations that fund the facility. Its birthday party space accommodates up to 25 people. There’s even yoga available to stretch the muscles, Varney says, which is good for growing bodies.

MAGGIE’S WIGS 4 KIDS WELLNESS CENTER & SALON

Watch for an opening date coming soon 30130 Harper Ave., St. Clair Shores Hours will be 9 a.m.-4:30 p.m. Tuesday, 9 a.m.-7 p.m. Wednesday-Thursday, 9 a.m.-4:30 p.m.

Friday-Saturday (check for salon hours) wigs4kids.org

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SPECIAL NEEDS SNippets

SENSORY FUN AT THE ZOO

The Detroit Zoo and Belle Isle Nature Center now have opportunities for everyone to join in the fun after becoming certified sensory inclusive.

The Detroit Zoological Society and Alabama-based nonprofit KultureCity teamed up to upgrade the venues’ programming. Staff and volunteers at both facilities also received training to help them spot guests with sensory needs and help them handle sensory overload, especially those living with autism, dementia and PTSD. “We want to be able to support everyone who comes to the zoo so they feel welcome,” says Carla Van Kampen, DZS curator of education.

The zoo also provides guests with sensory bags filled with noise-canceling headphones, fidget tools and more.

Before visiting, download the free KultureCity app at kulturecity.org/sensory-inclusive-app to view available sensory features.

PLAN OUT YOUR TRIPS

The Detroit Zoo in Royal Oak is typically open 9 a.m.-5 p.m. April-September (10 a.m.-4 p.m. the rest of the year), and the Belle Isle Nature Center in Detroit 10 a.m.5 p.m. daily. Check ahead for post-COVID-19 re-opening dates. detroitzoo.org and belleislenaturecenter.org.

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A CENTER FOR ALL

Families with special needs are right at home at the new Heights Community Center, which opened in late February with amenities for all abilities.

This creative 98,000-squarefoot facility, which is American With Disabilities Act compliant, features two full-size basketball courts, a walking track that’s wheelchair and stroller accessible, teen programs and drop-in options. It also boasts an early childhood room designed with an interactive “under the sea theme,” including a life-size fishbowl-inspired castle for reading.

“I am extremely proud of what we have accomplished and what we have planned for the future,” says Rachel Mulawa, the center’s adaptive recreation supervisor.

The city boasts a strong history in adaptive programming that dates back to 1978. Now there’s much more room for those fitness and dance classes, plus gathering areas created with parents and siblings in mind.

“Our programs have been restricted by our space, which is no longer an issue,” Mulawa says, adding that one of the most unique inclusive universal-design amenities in the building is an adult changing table. She hopes more buildings start adding them. “(This) allows for individuals to be able to spend the day here with family and friends without having to be placed on the public floor or (having their) time shortened around restroom scheduling,” Mulawa says.

STERLING HEIGHTS COMMUNITY CENTER

40250 Dodge Park Road Typically open 8:30 a.m.-10 p.m.

Monday-Friday, 8:30 a.m. to 8 p.m.

Saturday, closed Sunday. Check ahead for post-COVID-19 re-opening dates. myshpr.net

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Building a Sensory Toolkit for Children with Autism

F

rom the crowds of people to the foodfilled aisles to the dings of the checkout scanners, the hustle and bustle of a busy grocery store can be very stimulating for children on the autism spectrum. It is not uncommon for children with autism to experience sensory overstimulation, which can result in dysregulation – kicking, hitting, shutting down – and possibly other behaviors.

Sensory toolboxes, or toolkits, are one way to help children cope with overstimulation and prevent them from becoming dysregulated, says Katie Fisher, an occupational therapist (OT) at Blossom Behavioral Wellness Center in Novi.

You can grab these little handy sensory toolboxes, you can bring them with you wherever you go. They then become something that can calm your child, reduce stress, or reduce sensory triggers,” Fisher says.

While parents might be inclined to order a sensory toolkit online, Fisher says it is important to consult your child’s occupational therapist first. Each child’s needs are different, and some of the items in that toolkit you just purchased might not be effective in helping your child self-regulate – which, she says, is essentially the goal of these toolkits.

Sensory processing struggles Sight, sound, touch and taste – children can be sensitive to different sensory stimuli in their environment. And while many children can be over-responsive to sensory stimuli, others can be under-responsive, and some can crave certain sensory input, Fisher notes. Under-responsive children can have low attention and may appear lazy or lethargic. If you think of a glass full of water, this child’s water level would be low, thus needing a lot of input to fill them up and alert their system.

On the flip side, for an over-responsive child, “Their glass is almost full to the top, and they only need a little bit of sensory stimuli to fill up and can quickly spill over. So they can become overstimulated to their environment very fast,” Fisher says.

Katie Fisher, an occupational therapist with Blossom Behavioral Wellness Center in Novi, offers insight and advice for parents. By Stacey Winconek

chewy necklaces, vibrating toothbrush, When showing your child some of Building a sensory toolkit crunchy snacks (so they are getting the items, say something like this, “If Consult your child’s OT first, as that crunch within their teeth) you’re feeling like your body has too he or she is the ideal person to help Calming box: If you have a child that much energy, you could use this box you put together an effective sensory needs calming when they are overstimand get out the play foam and squeeze toolkit specific for your child, Fisher ulated by something visual or tactile, it in your hand,” she says. notes. Here, she provides some examfor example, this could be a great apShow them what to do and why they ples of sensory toolkits for children proach, Fisher notes. need to use it. But don’t push it either, with autism.

Items include: mini Etch A Sketch, she notes. It can take time for kids to Tactile box: “These items can be markers and paper, a book of mazes, figure out what regulates them. calming and help organize the body,” squishy balls, a bubble tower, pin art “As much as we want it to work she says. “They are designed to help instantly, sometimes it may take time to “Once you have a few of these reduce stress and calm sensory introduce the boxes.” in their little toolkit, you’re going to triggers.” Items include: kinetic sand, In the end, it could end up being introduce them slowly,” she says. Introbags with small textured items, trial-and-error – and that’s OK. These duce these items when your child is at textured bean bags, a cup of water can be modified any time. home, calm and regulated. beads, play foam Visual box: While lighted toys may work for some kids, they don’t work for all. (Be sure to check with your OT, as some flashing lights are not calming to a child).

Items include: small pinwheel, liquid motion timers, spinning tops, lighted toys Proprioceptive box: This relates to a child’s muscles and joints – and those who need pressure on their bodies.

“The whole idea is something that gives resistance to joints,” she says.

Items include: Monkey Noodles fidget toys, rubber band ball, therapy putty, shaking/dancing ball, push and pull fidget toy, stress balls, weighted stuffed animals Oral input box: These are good for For more information on Blossom Behavioral Wellness Center, focus and alertness, she says.

Items include: Chewy tubes, gum,

visit blossombehavioral.org.

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5 Ways to Support Kids With Autism When a child with autism needs support, where can families turn for help? Here, two experts from Harbor Oaks Hospital in New Baltimore offer insight and advice.

By Stacey Winconek

H

itting, biting, temper tantrums, property destruction and selfharm – these are just some of the aggressive behaviors that children with autism can display. And, if not addressed early, these behaviors can worsen and lead to bigger issues for both the child and his or her family.

In some cases, children end up at Harbor Oaks Hospital, located in New Baltimore, which offers inpatient specialized care for children ages 4-17 with autism and other developmental disorders.

“We are the first inpatient unit that is completely dedicated to kids with developmental disorders in the state of Michigan,” says Dr. Sanjeev Venkataraman, medical director of child and adolescent psychiatry at Harbor Oaks Hospital.

It is one of only 13 units of its kind in the United States, adds Shelby Fey, Harbor Oaks’ SIPU (specialized inpatient pediatric unit) program manager.

Both Venkataraman and Fey have been on the frontline of care for children with autism spectrum disorders and developmental disabilities – and they know firsthand how hard it can be for families to cope, particularly when they don’t know where to turn for help and resources.

“Now with the expansion of the autism diagnosis, there is some crunch for resources,” Venkataraman says. “Schools are

becoming more careful about giving out the resources,” so he says parents need to be prepared for getting “no” as an answer from that first step to receiving help for their child.

Not sure where to turn for more resources and support if your school can’t help? Read on for insight from Venkataraman and Fey.

them are family run or they have a family member who has autism or some other diagnoses, and they are helping other families find the right resources.”

In addition, there are larger organizations like Autism Alliance of Michigan and Autism Speaks that have developmental checklists for families to help them determine what steps they may need to take in their child’s care.

1. Start with your child’s pediatrician.

3. Establish a relationship with your child’s school.

Children with autism could benefit from having a developmental pediatrician, which is an expert in autism, developmental delays, learning disorders and more.

“They should be the first line of defense, because they are people who are much more aware of developmental disorders in kids. They can point the parents in a direction that will be beneficial to them,” Venkataraman says.

Getting in touch with your child’s pediatrician in a timely manner is key, too. “Like any of these conditions, earlier intervention is better,” he adds. The sooner you can identify the flags, the sooner your child can be directed to the appropriate resources.

2. Utilize community resources.

“Most counties have a typical nonprofit that’s helping families,” Fey says. “Some of

“All schools are not created equal; however, if you get a good school social worker, they can do a world of good for the parents,” Venkataraman says, “because they also know community resources; they have referred patients before so they know who and what works; and they can identify things early.”

He adds, “There are preschool teachers who are able to pick up stuff and say, ‘your kid is not as social as they should be, or can’t share, or has temper tantrums more often than other kids.’ ” Don’t burn bridges with teachers and social workers in schools, he cautions. While it’s easy to feel frustrated, try not to take that frustration out on the people you are entrusting your child to – you want to have a good rapport, he says.

“When you have a kid with any kind of special needs, you have to advocate without

becoming an adversary,” Venkataraman says.

4. Keep first responders in the know.

“A lot of people don’t know they can actually contact their fire department, their police department, and let them know about the disabilities or the problems” their child may experience, Fey says.

This is helpful especially if responders do have to go to a family’s house in a crisis: They’ll know beforehand what they are walking into and if a child might react a certain way to their presence.

“At the end of the day, when they are in these crisis situations before they come to us, there is typically some type of first responder involvement, which can make things much worse if it’s done incorrectly,” Fey adds.

5. Get advice from family.

This may not be the case for all families, but in many cases, grandparents – and other family members with more years of parenting experience – can sometimes provide a different perspective.

“These people have a lot of experience, and I have so many parents who will tell me, ‘Grandma was saying that he was not speaking as early,’ ” Venkataraman says. “As a parent, you should listen to extended family who have had more experience.”

Content sponsored by

Content brought to you by Harbor Oaks Hospital.

For more information, call 586-684-4574 or visit harboroaks.com.

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April

LET’S GO ^Digi

tal!

Looking for fun stuff to do at home? Don’t worry — Metro Parent has you covered. The events in southeast Michigan may be on hold and social distancing keeps us separated, but that doesn’t mean the fun is totally on pause.

We’ve decided to give our traditional calendar a breather and deliver the best digital events in town. Our web calendar is packed with virtual martial arts classes, story times, meditation challenges and much more, for kids and parents alike. We’re here for you, and we’re ready to help you weather this storm. Stay safe and healthy, and we’ll see you online!

MetroParent.com/CALENDAR

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APRIL 2020

37

Schools + Preschools

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DILEMMA CHIME IN

We post a new parent question on Facebook at 5 p.m. select Tuesdays and Fridays. Follow us at Facebook.com/MetroParentMagazine to join the conversation!

Q: We are Jewish but my kids really want to dye Easter eggs because they feel they are missing out on the fun. My husband is opposed to the idea. I suggested we see what other parents think before deciding. So, what do you think?

I was raised Jewish. We dyed eggs. I’m sure we didn’t call them Easter eggs.

And we didn’t have any conversation about the religious aspects of Easter.

We just liked the art project. I was not scarred for life. — Sophia S. It’s harmless. — Landan V. Maybe make it more of a science experiment than something related to religion? — Melissa A. As a Christian I look at dyeing eggs as more of a spring activity than a religious activity, but I could understand how your husband feels. Given there are lots of options maybe it would be best to come to a compromise with your husband and the kids agree with.

It’s mostly fun science. Especially if you use things that resist dye. You can dye tongue depressors, a cool pair of white sneakers, a T-shirt and tons of other stuff. You could always incorporate your religion into these items. My kids’ favorite part of egg dyeing is running

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around to the toilets in our house afterward and mixing the different colors to flush them. — Natalie C. Dyeing eggs is a tradition that goes back thousands of years in pagan traditions. Perhaps if you talk about that historical aspect with your kids and approach it as a fun, seasonal, secular activity, it could be fun for everyone in your family. (Allow me to suggest from experience that it will be more fun for you and whoever cleans the floor if you skip the glitter egg dyeing kit and stick with the standard one instead.)

— Shannan Y. Easter eggs are as religious as the Easter bunny and Cadbury chocolate.

Have fun with it and think of it as a springtime art project! — Sara W. My Hindu friend made a plea in middle school to her parents to celebrate Christmas and Easter. She told them that they had become commercialized holidays that are American and not

Christian. She won and they started celebrating this American tradition that coincided with school breaks. She then was not left out of a childhood experience that all her friends were having. My family isn’t religious, but we have always celebrated these holidays more out of experiencing the magic of childhood and the joy of the tradition with family. In our house Santa and the Easter bunny were akin to the tooth fairy. — Jessica D.

with my children. Still the same religion but I’ve adapted it to our lifestyle. I don’t see any harm in eggs or hunts or games for Easter. — Sara P. We don’t connect any religious symbolism whatsoever to the Easter Bunny or eggs. It’s just fun. — Jessica G. Let them enjoy it! I’ve heard of plenty of Jewish people that like and have “Christmas” trees because of the beautiful lights. — Regina C.

I don’t find Easter eggs to be religious at all. The eggs are actually based in more earth-based traditions as a symbol of new life and the season of spring. — Elizabeth K.

I think Easter eggs themselves are harmless but being on the same page as your husband is important.

— Sherry T.

My husband’s Jewish, I’m Catholic. The Easter bunny is neither so color the eggs. My boys love it. — Karen S.

Let them dye eggs. Big deal. It has nothing to do with religion. Do it for a fun family project together. — Nicole M.

I grew up without it. It was upsetting but I survived. I understood it was my mother’s religious choice and accepted it. I now allow and participate in it

Same boat. We have used our spring eggs on our Seder plate some years.

— Heather P.