FRIDAY, DECEMBER 17, 2021 B3
THE DAVIS ENTERPRISE
Dear Annie: My husband and I have been married for 34 years. We have two grown children, both of whom still live with us. They work and pay rent toward our mortgage. I have no problem with their living at home, and I don’t think my husband does either. The problem I have is that both my husband and my son are alcoholics. They both work hard, but when they are off, they get drunk, and my daughter and I have a hard time dealing with all the issues. My son is a closet alcoholic. He stays in his room and drinks, and when he comes out, he is very talkative and emotional, and he gets depressed. My husband can drink beer all day and spend his day doing yard work. In the afternoon, he takes a nap, and when he wakes up, he continues to drink. They both know they need help, but neither one is making any effort to get that help. My son went to a detox center over a year ago. Unfortunately, since the pandemic hit just after he was released, he did not get follow-up counseling and ended up relapsing. I spend a lot of time with my best friend, who I’ve known all my life. Once a year, we go on a small trip. The problem is my husband makes me feel guilty and gets angry at me for these trips. But I just need to get away and have someone to whom I can vent. It seems like my husband just expects me to stay home while he is out doing yard work. Should I be trying to do more to get them to quit drinking? Am I in the wrong here for spending time with friends? — Between a Rock and a Hard Place Dear Between: No and no. It’s up to your husband and son to get the help that they both clearly need. Spending time with your friends outside the house is a very healthy thing, a way of setting boundaries. Unfortunately, your husband is rearing against those boundaries. It seems he’s not content to just selfdestruct; he wants to drag
you down with him. If things continue this way, you may need to consider whether you can truly live under the same roof as him without it taking a toll on your mental health. To gain some clarity and insight, I encourage you to make an appointment with a therapist who specializes in addiction. You may also find solace and strength in support groups such as AlAnon (https://www.alanon.org) or SMART Recovery Family and Friends (https://www. smartrecovery.org/family). ——— Dear Annie: I’ve been in a relationship with “Wanda” for three years, living with her for eight months. She’s cheated on me many times. When I found out, we’d already been dating for two years, so I figured I’d stay. However, I suspect it’s still happening. On top of this, she hits me, spits on my face and calls me names. I guess it’s pretty clear that I need to walk away, but for some reason, I don’t. I think it’s because I’m 38 and have never had a serious relationship work out in the long term. Call me crazy, but I just can’t seem to leave. What advice do you have for me? — Beleaguered Boyfriend Dear Beleaguered: You deserve better. You owe it to yourself to get out of that house and out of that relationship. Please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-7997233) — which deals with all forms of domestic abuse — for emotional support and assistance making an exit plan. Give yourself the chance to live the life you’re meant to live. ——— Dear Annie: In response to “One Grieving Grandmother to Another,” who was upset about not seeing her children and grandchildren on holidays, I was thinking she could try making her own “holidays” or special Sundays. If invited ahead of time, her family might come together and be with her. Competition on regular holidays makes it hard for grown children to see all the family. If there are birthday celebrations for grandkids,
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I think it’s perfectly OK to ask ahead if she may join the festivities, instead of waiting for them to extend the favor. Sometimes, we just have to be proactive. — Understanding Grandma Dear Understanding Grandma: Being proactive and creative is always a good thing. Thank you for your suggestion.
Dear Annie: I am a woman in my mid-30s, and my wife is in her early 40s. We met a little less than two years ago and haven’t left each other’s side since. We got married about a year ago. Needless to say, we both fell fast and hard for each other. When I met her, my whole world changed, and I look at the world in a completely different way. She makes me want to be a better person altogether. But we have a problem. My wife already had trust issues from a previous relationship in which she was betrayed. Well, several months ago, I broke her trust by talking to my ex on the phone. It was an innocent conversation, but I knew that it would upset my wife. I felt terrible and immediately admitted what I’d done, admitted that it was wrong and promised that it wouldn’t ever happen again. Fast-forward four months, and nothing seems to be enough for my wife. She continues to throw it in my face. Every time my phone makes a noise, she wants to look at it. There’s not a day that goes by that she doesn’t make a smart-
aleck remark about my talking to my ex on the phone. I am truly lost because I love this woman more than life itself and have never been happier. But I can’t continue to allow her to say the mean and hurtful things she’s been saying, and I can’t take the distance between us, and I can’t take any more of the barrages of questions. I love her and don’t want to ever face life without her, but the cruelty is breaking me down quickly. I don’t know what to do anymore. — Heartbroken Wife Dear Heartbroken: Jealous, controlling behavior is not the stuff of a healthy relationship, and it can veer into emotionally abusive territory. Your wife’s past relationship issues don’t give her license to treat you poorly. You love her and want her in your life — but she needs to seek individual counseling and/or to attend couples counseling with you so that you can both have a shot at a healthy, sustainable life together built on trust. ——— Dear Annie: So many of your letters come from disgruntled people who feel alienated by other people’s text messages. I think it is important to realize that when you read a text message, you do not hear the inflection of the person’s voice. The sender’s words can come across totally differently to the person reading it. A simple phone call following up a text might solve many misunderstandings. — Wiser in North Carolina Dear Wiser: Wise words indeed. I know many people who have ended up in huge arguments over misunderstandings that arose over text message. Reserve texts for light chitchat, words of encouragement and basic logistics only. Anything other than that deserves a phone call.
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FILED IN YOLO COUNTY CLERK'S OFFICE Jesse Salinas, Yolo County Clerk/Recorder F20211047 12/06/2021 Business is located in YOLO County Fictitious Business Name: Burnham Partners LLC Physical Address: 1606 L St. Davis, CA 95616 Mailing Address: Names of Registrant(s)/Owner(s): Burnham Partners LLC 1606 L St. Davis, CA 95616 Business Classification: Limited Liability Company Starting Date of Business: 10/28/2021 s/Douglas A. Walter Official Title: Manager Corporation Name: Burnham Partners LLC Published December 10, 17, 24, 31, 2021
FILED IN YOLO COUNTY CLERK'S OFFICE Jesse Salinas, Yolo County Clerk/Recorder F20211032 12/01/2021 Business is located in YOLO County Fictitious Business Name: BARIOLA BON PRODUCTIONS Physical Address: 216 F St. #4 Davis, CA 95616 Mailing Address: Names of Registrant(s)/Owner(s): Michael David Janzen 216 F St. #4 Davis, CA 95616 Business Classification: Individual Starting Date of Business: 12/01/2021 s/Michael David Janzen Official Title: Owner Corporation Name: N/A Published December 10, 17, 24, 31, 2021
FILED IN YOLO COUNTY CLERK'S OFFICE Jesse Salinas, Yolo County Clerk/Recorder F20211027 11/29/2021 Iramirez, Deputy Business is located in YOLO County Fictitious Business Name: CMIT Solutions of Sacramento NW Physical Address: 1777 Oak Ave. Ste. B Davis, CA 95616 Mailing Address: PO Box 4088 Davis, CA 95617 Names of Registrant(s)/Owner(s): Ironwood Technologies 1777 Oak Ave. Ste. B Davis, CA 95616 Business Classification: Corporation Starting Date of Business: 11/19/2021 s/Tze Koon Yang Official Title: President Corporation Name: Ironwood Technologies, Inc. Published December 3, 10, 17, 24, 2021 #1600
——— Dear Annie: You recently told “At Our Wit’s End,” a couple whose adult child was struggling with alcoholism, to attend an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. You should have told them to attend a meeting of Al-Anon, the organization for family and friends of alcoholics. I hope you will publish a correction. — Grateful Al-Anon Member Dear Grateful: I regret the error. That was indeed due to a mix-up. Thanks for setting the record straight.
Self-reflection is essential Dear Annie: I feel the need to provide a different view to the “Grieving Grandmothers” who wrote in saying that their daughters-in-law keep their grandkids and sons away from them. First, your son is a grown adult who can make choices for himself, so maybe start taking the blame off the daughter-inlaw. Second, maybe reflect on yourself to see if there are reasons your son does not want to attend gatherings with you or have their children around you. I’m sure my mother-inlaw could write in saying all these things about me, but it is not the truth. My husband finds his mother and immediate family unhealthy and toxic. He prefers attending gatherings with my family and doesn’t trust his mother to be around our children. We ended up in marriage counseling because the weight of trying to deal with all of it was affecting our marriage. It was our therapist, not me, who suggested to my husband that he create boundaries with his own mother. My hus-
band always knew the dynamic was unhealthy, but it wasn’t until we were married that he felt he had a safe space to distance himself from his immediate family. While it is easier to blame someone else, it may be worth looking inward to see what we are bringing to the problem. — Family Scapegoat Dear Family Scapegoat: Self-reflection is always a good thing. I’m glad that your husband was able to create boundaries with his mother, but try not to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Just because she is not perfect does not mean you don’t have to show her some respect and compassion. Grandchildren intuitively love their grandparents, and anything that helps them get together, with the oversight of the parents, is a good thing. Boundaries set by the parents can promote harmony — provided they include entrances and exits for the grandparents. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@ creators.com.
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FILED IN YOLO COUNTY CLERK'S OFFICE Jesse Salinas, Yolo County Clerk/Recorder F20211046 12/06/2021 Business is located in YOLO County Fictitious Business Name: OAKSHADE IT Physical Address: 2020 5th Ave., #1242 Davis, CA 95616 Mailing Address: Names of Registrant(s)/Owner(s): 1) Peter William Broderick 1630 La Habra Ct. Davis, CA 95618 Business Classification: Individual Starting Date of Business: 12/01/2021 s/Peter Broderick Official Title: N/A Corporation Name: N/A Published December 10, 17, 24, 31, 2021 FILED IN YOLO COUNTY CLERK'S OFFICE Jesse Salinas, Yolo County Clerk/Recorder F20211036 12/02/2021 Business is located in YOLO County Fictitious Business Name: DAVIS WILLS AND TRUSTS Physical Address: 2810 5th Street Davis, CA 95618 Mailing Address: Names of Registrant(s)/Owner(s): Jennifer Bretschneider 38243 Patwin Terrace Davis, CA 95616 Business Classification: Individual Starting Date of Business: 8/1/2011 s/ Jennifer Bretschneider Official Title: Corporation Name: Published December 10, 17, 24, 31, 2021
NOTICE OF PETITION TO ADMINISTER ESTATE OF HIROKO KOWTA CASE NO. PR2021-0269 FILED IN YOLO COUNTY CLERK'S OFFICE Jesse Salinas, Yolo County Clerk/Recorder F20211026 11/29/2021 Business is located in YOLO County Fictitious Business Name: SESAME Physical Address: 213 E STREET #A DAVIS, CA 95616 Mailing Address: Names of Registrant(s)/Owner(s): 1) Meili Lei 825 Sycamore Ln. Davis, CA 95616 Business Classification: Individual Starting Date of Business: 11/29/2021 s/ Meili Lei Official Title: Owner Corporation Name: N/A Published December 3, 10, 17, 24, 2021 #1599
ORDER TO SHOW CAUSE FOR CHANGE OF NAME Case Number: CV2021-2088 To all interested persons: Petitioner: Alena Pafelova on behalf of Naum Lyustiger filed a petition with this court for a decree changing names as follows: Present name Naum Lyustiger to Proposed name Naum David Lyustiger THE COURT ORDERS that all persons interested in this matter appear before this court at the hearing indicated below to show cause, if any, why the petition for change of name should not be granted. Any person objecting to the name changes described above must file a written objection that includes the reasons for the objection at least two court days before the matter is scheduled to be heard and must appear at the hearing to show cause why the petition should not be granted. If no written objection is timely filed, the court may grant the petition without a hearing. NOTICE OF HEARING Date: 1/19/2022 at 9:00 a.m. Dept. 10 Room: Zoom The address of the court is Yolo Superior Court Clerks Office - Civil 1000 Main Street, Woodland, CA 95695 A copy of this Order to Show Cause shall be published at least once each week for four successive weeks prior to the date set for hearing on the petition in the following newspaper of general circulation, printed in this county: The Davis Enterprise. Date: 11/20/2021 Samuel T. McAdam Judge of the Superior Court Published December 3, 10, 17, 24, 2021 #1601
To all heirs, beneficiaries, creditors, contingent creditors, and persons who may otherwise be interested in the will or estate, or both, of: HIROKO KOWTA A PETITION FOR PROBATE has been filed by: Matthew Kowta in the Superior Court of California, County of: Yolo THE PETITION FOR PROBATE requests that: Matthew Kowta be appointed as personal representative to administer the estate of the decedent. THE PETITION requests authority to administer the estate under the Independent Administration of Estates Act. (This authority will allow the personal representative to take many actions without obtaining court approval. Before taking certain very important actions, however, the personal representative will be required to give notice to interested persons unless they have waived notice or consented to the proposed action.) The independent administration authority will be granted unless an interested person files an objection to the petition and shows good cause why the court should not grant the authority. A HEARING on the petition will be held on January 20, 2022 at 9:00 a.m. in Department 9 located at 1000 Main Street, Woodland, CA 95695. IF YOU OBJECT to the granting of the petition, you should appear at the hearing and state your objections or file written objections with the court before the hearing. Your appearance may be in person or by your attorney. IF YOU ARE A CREDITOR or a contingent creditor of the decedent, you must file your claim with the court and mail a copy to the personal representative appointed by the court within the later of either (1) four months from the date of first issuance of letters to a general personal representative, as defined in section 58(b) of the California Probate Code, or (2) 60 days from the date of mailing or personal delivery to you of a notice under section 9052 of the California Probate Code. Other California statutes and legal authority may affect your rights as a creditor. You may want to consult with an attorney knowledgeable in California law. YOU MAY EXAMINE the file kept by the court. If you are a person interested in the estate, you may file with the court a Request for Special Notice (form DE-154) of the filing of an inventory and appraisal of estate assets or of any petition or account as provided in Probate Code section 1250. A Request for Special Notice form is available from the court clerk. Signed: Matthew Kowta, Petitioner 1639 Joshua Tree St. Davis, CA 95616 530-219-0682 Published 12/10, 12/12, 12/17 #1604