WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 2, 2020 PAGE B3
New relationship has changed Mom’s personality Dear Annie: I am in my 40s, married, with children. My parents were married for 38 years before my father’s passing six years ago. My siblings and I had discussed the idea of our mother finding new love at some point. We felt it was inevitable because our mother, honestly, would be quite the catch. She is loving, funny, smart, kind, dependable, hardworking, a great cook and debt-free (thanks, Dad!). All qualities that we were grateful to have in a role model for ourselves and our children. So, we were not surprised when she told us two years ago that she was “talking” to someone. Within the first year of the new relationship, this person gave our mother what we considered many red flags — narcissism, lying and infidelity, to name a few. She broke it off for a month, only to take him back, with her attitude being to forgive and forget. Over the past two years, our mom has seemingly turned into someone we do not recognize. She is ill-tempered during any conversation, unreliable, selfcentered and co-dependent. I believe she acts this way because we do not approve of her man. We do want her to be happy. But as people who care for her, we also feel she deserves better. She is not open to discussing any of this as a family. Where did our mom go? Is there an age or moment when one decides to stop being a parent? Should we stop trying to see her as our parent and start seeing her as another adult with issues? In relationships, are we together because we are similar, or are we similar because we are together? — Life Upside-Down Dear Life Upside-Down: It sounds like you had an incredible role model and upbringing. No, a mother never stops being a mother, but at a certain age, or after a traumatic event such as the death of your father, relationships and roles can change and grow. Your desire for your mom to be happy is a by-product of your love for her, and you are right to be concerned for her happiness. A happy person is not ill-tempered, unreliable and self-centered. This dramatic shift in personality is a warning sign that something unhealthy is going on in her new relationship. They say that love is blind, but when you are being manipulated and abused by a narcissistic partner, you can’t be blind to bad behavior. However, it’s your role to continue to be there for your mom unconditionally. If she gets angry at you or cancels appointments, then meet her with kindness and forgiveness. Maybe see if you can go for a mother/daughter day together. When you are alone, ask her how she is doing and really listen to her. If you feel that there
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is any type of abuse going on, encourage her to seek immediate help. Losing her spouse of 38 years is a traumatic event. A professional therapist could help her regain independence and see this relationship clearly.
Teach a man to fish Dear Annie: My husband and I are 72 and retired. We have always had a special relationship with our 27-year-old grandson, bailing him out financially whenever he was in a tight situation. However, he just recently asked for big help with his rent, utilities and other expenses since he changed jobs again. His new job sounds very promising, but history tells us that something bad will happen with this opportunity as well. He did not take our refusal to help him very well, and my husband is feeling guilty about not helping him out, although we really cannot afford this any longer. I feel we had no choice and that he must learn to deal with life’s problems himself. Am I right? Will he learn? — Enabler No More Dear Enabler No More: Yes, you are right. He is a 27-year-old adult and very capable of providing for himself. This was the kindest thing you could do for him and his self-esteem — in the long run. He might be mad and have a little tantrum, but once he is over it, he will realize that he can indeed take care of himself and will hopefully apologize to you for having acted like a child. Give a man a fish and he will always ask for more; teach him to fish and he can provide dinner for himself and his entire family. ——— Dear Annie: This is a message to the girl who was cyberbullied: I know you have a beautiful spirit because you thought the best about the girls and didn’t understand their ugliness. Internal beauty gets more beautiful with time, physical beauty less so. (That doesn’t mean you’re not beautiful outside, too.) The main girl and her followers are attacking you because they see that you are different. Using their experience and vocabulary, the closest they can come is “nerd.” It is your choice to be bullied or not, not theirs. If you’re not bullied, they will be wasting their time, and people will see them as they are. Don’t look at their stuff, and don’t pay attention to them in school. To be more “nerdy,” write,
“I forgive you, and I am moving on.” Help another good nerdy girl, as two are stronger together. It will encourage others and open up a whole new world with the kind of people you want to be with. They are out there. — Concerned Grandmother Dear Concerned: Thank you for your beautiful letter. Focusing on the beauty inside of people will lead to a much happier, more fun and more joyful life. Your vibe attracts your tribe, and you are encouraging this beautiful young girl to find her tribe. I love it! Dear Annie: Before cyberbullying, my grandson was physically bullied by a leader and two boys. They knocked him down, broke his arm and threatened his life in school. They got away with it. My daughter contacted the police, who secured counseling for the bullies. The police said that in another year, the boys would have been so emboldened as to be beyond help and most likely would be in the criminal justice system. Today, my “nerdy” grandson has a master’s degree and a lovely wife. They have a darling baby; a nice home; many kind, successful friends; and spectacular careers. Happy endings can take time and effort. — Grateful Grandma Dear Grateful Grandma: It was wonderful that your daughter involved the police and you were all able to stop events that could have turned tragic. I’m always reminded of the famous Aesop’s fable of the tortoise and the hare. Sometimes, the slower to develop or bloom end up winning the race. In life, that goal is to find happiness and to be surrounded by friends and family, filled up with warmth and love. You should be so proud of your grandson, and your daughter is something special.
Boyfriend texts female friend back but not me Dear Annie: A few months ago, I found out that my boyfriend was messaging a girl. He says she is just a friend. I’ve asked where he knows her from, but he brushes it off and says it was just a friendly text. I believe him that she’s just a friend, but what bothers me is that the whole time this was happening, he would tell me that he was too busy to reply to me. He does work a lot so I’ve tried to be understanding when there’s limited communication. However, it hurts me that he took the time to reply to her messages during his workday while saying that he didn’t have time to reply to mine. It has been two months since I discovered this, and I am still very upset. I’ve brought it up again a couple of times, and he listens to a point, but then he just shuts down the conversation, saying she’s just a friend and I shouldn’t worry
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— Not Over It Dear Not Over It: His texting a female friend is not the core issue, as you seem to acknowledge. The core issue is your feeling devalued by his lack of communication. Put the emphasis squarely on that. Let him know your needs — for instance, “I would feel
loved and important if you could respond within a few hours of my texting you, even if it’s just to say that you’re too busy to respond.” Without good communication, even the smallest of things can fester and infect the relationship. With good communication, couples can heal the most painful wounds. So, get talking.
Public Notice ORDER TO SHOW CAUSE FOR CHANGE OF NAME Case Number: CV2020-1495 1. Shraddha Shah filed a petition with this court for a decree changing names as follows: Shraddha Shah to Shradha Shah 2. THE COURT ORDERS that all persons interested in this matter shall appear before this court at the hearing indicated below to show cause, if any, why the petition should not be granted. NOTICE OF HEARING Date: December 17, 2020 Time: 9 a.m. Dept: #9 Room: N/A The address of the court is 1000 Main Street, Woodland, CA 95695 3. a) A copy of this Order to Show Cause shall be published at least once a week for four successive weeks prior to the date set for hearing on the petition in the following newspaper of general circulation, printed in this county: The Davis Enterprise 315 G Street, Davis, CA 95616 Date: November 3, 2020 Daniel M. Wolk Judge of the Superior Court 11/11, 11/18, 11/25, 12/2 1047
Individual 5. Beginning Date of Business: The Registrant(s) commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name or names listed above on: N/A “I declare that all information in this statement is true and correct.” (A registrant who declares as true information which he or she knows to be false is guilty of a crime.) 6. Signature of Registrant(s): Tamara Pelle 11/25, 12/2, 12/9, 12/16 1060
ORDER TO SHOW CAUSE FOR CHANGE OF NAME Case Number: CV2020-1533 1. Emily Faith Rosell filed a petition with this court for a decree changing names as follows: Emily Faith Rosell to Emily Faith Levin-Rosenshine 2. THE COURT ORDERS that all persons interested in this matter shall appear before this court at the hearing indicated below to show cause, if any, why the petition should not be granted. NOTICE OF HEARING Date: January 7, 2021 Time: 9 a.m. Dept: #9 Room: N/A The address of the court is 1000 Main Street, Woodland, CA 95695 FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME 3. a) A copy of this Order to Show Cause STATEMENT shall be published at least once a week Filed: October 30, 2020 for four successive weeks prior to the FBN Number: F20200898 date set for hearing on the petition in 1. Fictitious Business Name(s) the following newspaper of general Davis Naturopathic Medicine circulation, printed in this county: 2. Street Address, City, State and Zip of The Davis Enterprise Principal Place of Business in California. 315 G Street, Davis, CA 95616 Business is located in Yolo County. Date: November 13, 2020 621 4th Street, Suite 6 Daniel M. Wolk Davis, CA 95616 Judge of the Superior Court Mailing address: 11/25, 12/2, 12/9, 12/16 1062 P.O. Box 74194 Davis, CA 95617 NOTICE OF LIEN SALE 3. List Full Name(s) of Registrant(s), Residence Address, State, and Zip Notice is hereby given pursuant to Kathleen M. Coleman California Business and Professional 6832 Antigua Way Codes #21700-21716, Section 2328 of Sacramento, CA 95831 the UCC of the Penal Code, Section 535 4. Business Classification: the undersigned, Storquest Express Self Individual Storage of Woodland, will sell at public 5. Beginning Date of Business: The sale by competitive bidding the personal Registrant(s) commenced to transact property of: Name: Rachelle Calderon, business under the fictitious business David Garcia, Haley Ware, Javontae name or names listed above on: Felix property to be sold: household October 28, 2020 goods, furniture, appliances, clothes, “I declare that all information in toys, tools, boxes & contents. Auctioneer this statement is true and correct.” Company: www.storagetreasures.com (A registrant who declares as true The Sale will end at 10:00 AM, Dec.17 information which he or she knows to be 2020. Goods must be paid for in CASH false is guilty of a crime.) at site and removed at completion of 6. Signature of Registrant(s): sale. Sale is subject to cancellation in the Kathleen Coleman, ND event of settlement between owner and 11/11, 11/18, 11/25, 12/2 1049 obligated party. Storquest Express Woodland FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME 1610 Tide Ct. STATEMENT Woodland, CA 95776 Filed: November 5, 2020 (530) 338-3531 FBN Number: F20200904 12/2, 12/9 1069 1. Fictitious Business Name(s) NOTICE OF PETITION TO By Design Studio, Inc. ADMINISTER ESTATE OF 2. Street Address, City, State and Zip of Principal Place of Business in California. Sheila Stephens Business is located in Yolo County. CASE NO. PR-2020-0176 528 D Street To all heirs, beneficiaries, creditors, Davis, CA 95616 contingent creditors, and persons who 3. List Full Name(s) of Registrant(s), may otherwise be interested in the will Residence Address, State, and Zip or estate, or both, of: Sheila Stephens By Design Studio, Inc. A PETITION FOR PROBATE has been 528 D Street filed by: Deborah Stephens in the Davis, CA 95616 Superior Court of California, County of: 4. Business Classification: Yolo Corporation THE PETITION FOR PROBATE requests 5. Beginning Date of Business: The that: Deborah Stephens be appointed Registrant(s) commenced to transact as personal representative to administer business under the fictitious business the estate of the decedent. name or names listed above on: 1996 THE PETITION requests authority “I declare that all information in to administer the estate under the this statement is true and correct.” Independent Administration of Estates (A registrant who declares as true Act. (This authority will allow the personal information which he or she knows to be representative to take many actions false is guilty of a crime.) without obtaining court approval. Before 6. Signature of Registrant(s): taking certain very important actions, Elma Gardner however, the personal representative will 11/18, 11/25, 12/2, 12/9 1054 be required to give notice to interested persons unless they have waived notice FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME or consented to the proposed action.) STATEMENT The independent administration Filed: November 16, 2020 authority will be granted unless an FBN Number: F20200928 interested person files an objection to 1. Fictitious Business Name(s) the petition and shows good cause why Firearms Defense Institute the court should not grant the authority. 2. Street Address, City, State and Zip of A HEARING on the petition will be held Principal Place of Business in California. on December 3, 2020 at 9:00 a.m. in Business is located in Yolo County. Department 9 located at 1000 Main 91 Utah Ave. Street, Woodland, CA 95695. Woodland, CA 95695 IF YOU OBJECT to the granting of 3. List Full Name(s) of Registrant(s), the petition, you should appear at the Residence Address, State, and Zip hearing and state your objections or file Nicolas Jack Marquette written objections with the court before 91 Utah Ave. the hearing. Your appearance may be in Woodland, CA 95695 person or by your attorney. 4. Business Classification: IF YOU ARE A CREDITOR or a contingent Individual creditor of the decedent, you must file 5. Beginning Date of Business: The your claim with the court and mail a copy Registrant(s) commenced to transact to the personal representative appointed business under the fictitious business by the court within the later of either name or names listed above on: N/A (1) four months from the date of first “I declare that all information in issuance of letters to a general personal this statement is true and correct.” (A registrant who declares as true representative, as defined in section 58(b) information which he or she knows to be of the California Probate Code, or (2) 60 days from the date of mailing or personal false is guilty of a crime.) delivery to you of a notice under section 6. Signature of Registrant(s): 9052 of the California Probate Code. Nicolas Marquette 11/18, 11/25, 12/2, 12/9 1055 Other California statutes and legal authority may affect your rights as FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME a creditor. You may want to consult STATEMENT with an attorney knowledgeable in California law. Filed: November 20, 2020 YOU MAY EXAMINE the file kept by the FBN Number: F20200945 court. If you are a person interested in 1. Fictitious Business Name(s) the estate, you may file with the court a Olson Investigation Services 2. Street Address, City, State and Zip of Request for Special Notice (form DE-154) Principal Place of Business in California. of the filing of an inventory and appraisal of estate assets or of any petition or Business is located in Yolo County. account as provided in Probate Code 397 Cardinal Drive section 1250. A Request for Special Woodland, CA 95695 Notice form is available from the court Mailing address: clerk. P.O. Box 1304 Signed: Nicholas D. Yonano, Esq. Woodland, CA 95776 3. List Full Name(s) of Registrant(s), Attorney for petitioner Yonano Law Offices, P.C. Residence Address, State, and Zip 4944 Windplay Drive, Suite 119 Tamara Pelle El Dorado Hills, CA 95762 397 Cardinal Drive (916)817-4422 Woodland, CA 95695 12/2, 12/4, 12/9 1070 4. Business Classification: