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3 News

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Administration releases landmark budget Part one of a four-part series: defecit to be eliminated by end of fiscal year Henry Gass The McGill Daily

O

n May 25, the Board of Governors approved the McGill University Budget 2010-2011, an ambitious document that has the potential to dramatically alter the direction of the University and its finances in coming years.

Among the goals set forward in the nearly 60-page Budget Book is the funnelling of funding to lucrative graduate research, the deregulation and increase of student tuition, and the elimination of the University’s deficit by the end of this fiscal year.

The University’s Fiscal Year (FY) has been shortened to 11 months, with the year ending April 30 as opposed to May 31.

The measure is part of an effort by the provincial government to bring the FY of Quebec universities closer in line with the provincial governments’ FY, which ends March 30. The measure is also aimed at reducing the province’s overall deficit. Various revenues and expenses have been reduced to accommodate the 11-month FY, to the degree where revenues now outweigh expenses.

The 11-month FY proposes a “close to break-even scenario’’ for the University. Within an 11-month FY the Budget predicts total revenues to reach approximately $1.03 billion,

with total expenses at approximately $1 billion.

Thus, the 2011 Budget is projected to break even, a significant accomplishment given the severe deficit the University has faced since the 2008 recession, and the even worse financial situation of other Quebec universities, as well as the provincial government that provides a large portion of their funds.

Of nine Quebec universities surveyed by the Conférence de recteurs et des principaux des universities du Québec, McGill had the fourth highest accumulated operating deficit in May 2009 with an approximately $70-million deficit. Université de Montréal led the way with a deficit of approximately $140 million. Université du Québec a Montréal had approximately $115 million in deficits, but the impact of UQAM’s capital project deficits, including millions of dollars the University lost in a failed real estate investment last year, was not taken into account. The average accumulated operating deficit amongst Quebec universities was approximately $55 million.

By May 2009, McGill had reduced its deficit by $50 million, and by the end of FY2009-10, McGill had reduced its deficit from $20 million to $5 million.

The provincial government is in even worse financial straits. For the FY 2009-10 the province posted a $4.3-billion deficit, a level not reached since 1996-1997. As part

of the provincial government’s attempts to reduce expenses, postsecondary education institutions have received major funding cuts in recent years.

The University still relies heavily on the provincial government for its funding; the most notable provincial grant, one from the Ministère de l’Éducation, du Loisir et du Sport (MELS) accounts for almost half McGill’s revenue.

“The Federal government has been slashing the post-secondary education budget, and the provincial government has followed suit,” said SSMU President Zach Newburgh.

“There’s a serious underfunding crisis [at McGill].”

As a result of underfunding, McGill has attempted to find revenue beyond provincial grants in this year’s Budget.

“The percentage of McGill’s budget that comes directly from MELS is being reduced (even as its dollar amount increases),” wrote Provost Anthony Masi, in an email to the Daily. The Provost and his office are responsible for drafting the Budget each year.

Instead of relying on provincial grants, McGill is harvesting additional revenue from “select priority areas” that are beneficial to the University’s global reputation and lucrative for its bottom line. The priorities are focused mainly on graduate studies and research.

“We are increasing research dollars and the overheads that accom-

Source McGill Budget 2010- 2011

pany them…[and] we are working with foundations and the private sector on projects,” said Masi.

The University Budget is comprised of four funds: Operating, Restricted, Capital, and Endowment.

The Operating fund deals with all activities associated with McGill’s core research and teaching activities. A large proportion of the MELS grant goes into this fund.

The Restricted fund is essentially the same, only the money deposited in that fund has specific restrictions.

Research grants are an example of restricted money. The 2010-2011 Budget forecasts restricted fund research revenues to total approximately $263.5 million. Of that total, roughly $140 million comes from the federal government, $35 million from the provincial government,

and $5 million from the U.S. government. Canadian corporations accounted for approximately $2.5 million, while Canadian foundations and associations contributed $14 million, and U.S. corporations contributed $92 million, with U.S. foundations and associations accounting for almost $2 million.

The Capital fund comprises all revenues from sources specifically earmarked for the acquisition, construction or renovation of capital assets -- in other words infrastructure purchase, maintenance, and construction. The recent purchase of a downtown hotel was funded in this way.

The Endowment Fund is comprised of all gifts, donations, and bequests made to the University for specific purposes, such as financial aid.

Good vibes at Parc Oxygène Photo by Victor Tangermann On August 29, community activists and people looking for a good time gathered at Parc Oxygène, the “green space” nestled in the alley between Parc, Pine, Hutchinson, and Prince Arthur, as part of an ongoing effort to protect the space from development. The event was billed a “love-in”; those in attendance were treated to acoustic guitar music and led in a Hungarian folk dance.

The park has been maintained independently by local residents for nearly 20 years.

Off-Campus Eye

4 News

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

The Census Scandal in Perspective

June 29: News breaks that the government will scrap the mandatory long-form census; StatsCan concerned about the affect of the decision on census data.

July 18: Maxime Bernier, Conservative MP from Quebec, parrots Trudeau’s famous phrase in arguing against census questions about the number of bedrooms in the respondent’s home: “The state does not belong in the bedrooms of Canadians.”

July 21: Munir Sheikh, head of StatsCan, resigns with a public letter posted on the agency’s website. Cites disagreement over whether a voluntary long-form census can replace the mandatory version.

July 27: Sheikh defends mandatory long-form vcensus in parliamentary committee. Industry Minister Tony Clement appears before the same committee, defending the census changes.

August 2: 5,000 statisticians from around the world meet in Vancouver; many voice support for Sheikh, decry government decision.

August 10: Leaked documents reveal that Clement was warned

by StatsCan of the risk that the voluntary census would yield low completion rates.

August 11: After “a couple of weeks” of deliberation, PGSS, SSMU, and two Concordia student groups release a joint statement condemning the government’s decision.

August 26: John McCallum, Liberal MP and Finance Critic, says he is planning to present legislation to reinstate the mandatory long-form census, but remove the threat of jail time for noncompliance.

Student government opposes census changes SSMU and PGSS release joint statement with Concordia groups condemning government’s decision Eric Andrew-Gee The McGill Daily

M

cGill student groups are up in arms over the Harper government’s June decision to scrap Canada’s mandatory long-form census, saying they fear the change will strike at the quality of student research.

On August 11, McGill’s PostGraduate Student Society (PGSS) and the undergraduate Students’ Society of McGill University (SSMU) released a press release along with two student groups from Concordia, railing against the government’s decision. Ryan Hughes, PGSS VP External, said that the not-for-profit Free Education Montreal was also involved in planning the coordinated statement.

The release asserts, “graduate students use [the census] data daily to complete research and conduct projects,” including gauging “the quality of public transit… and how civil society organizations can better engage with social issues such as poverty and discrimination.”

Hughes further described his

organization’s opposition to the census changes as a matter of principle. “Generally, the PGSS does not support any actions taken by the government taken solely for ideological purposes,” he said.

He went on to say that his work as VP External, a position in which he is responsible for advocating on behalf of students to various levels of government, would be directly affected by the changes to the census.

“I’m currently conducting a tuition review and I’ve seen a lot of material that’s relied on StatsCan in my research,” Hughes said, referring to Statistics Canada, the federal statistical agency responsible for the census.

Myriam Zaidi, SSMU VP External, echoed the press releases’ focus on student research in an interview with the Daily, saying, “SSMU is a student society and we want to support student research.”

Zaidi also said her work as a VP External would be affected because “as VP External we use StatsCan material to analyze the level of education in different provinces. …I’ve used StatsCan already this summer four times, just to know

how to compare Quebec to other provinces when it comes to education.”

Daniel Simeone, a graduate student in the history department and Speaker of PGSS Council, worries about how this will influence the work of scholars a hundred years from now.

He conceded that most current historians would not be touched directly by the changes to the census, but said “historians of the future won’t be able to have as fine-grained an understanding of Canadian society.”

“One of the benefits of the censuses of the past,” Simeone continued, “is that you can read into them the history of groups that don’t otherwise produce history. So, women’s history, gay history, immigrant history.”

Under the Harper government’s proposal, a shorter voluntary census would continue to be sent out to one-fifth of homes every five years. But opponents of the changes believe the voluntary nature of the new census will create a selfselecting sample of respondents and weaken the credibility of the census data.

Munir Sheikh, who was head of Statistics Canada when the Harper government announced its decision regarding the census, resigned after Industry Minister Tony Clement repeatedly claimed a voluntary census could produce data as reliable as the mandatory form. Commenting on whether or not the voluntary census “can become a substitute for a mandatory census,” Sheikh said simply: “It can not.”

Many supporters of the government’s decision say a mandatory long-form census is unnecessarily coercive. Until the Harper government took its decision, the penalty for failing to complete the longform census was either a $500 max. fine or a maximum of three months in prison, although no one has ever faced prison time for the infraction.

On August 26 John McCallum, the Liberal Finance Critic, said he would introduce legislation to reinstate the mandatory long-form census, but without the threat of jail time for failing to complete the form.

Dr. Reuven Brenner, an economics professor and REPAP Chair of Economics at McGill’s

Desautels Faculty of Management, opposes the mandatory long-form census on the grounds that any penalties attached to failing to complete the census are irrational and excessive.

“If people don’t vote (which is far more important for sustaining a vibrant democracy, I would think) there are no penalties involved and it’s nobody’s business,” Dr. Brenner wrote in an email. “I am not saying there should be penalties for this, but then it is a puzzle why ‘liberals’ think that not filling the forms deserves any punishment.”

Dr. Brenner also criticized opposition parties for making the census a partisan issue. “If, as now [Liberal MP John] McCallum admits, the Liberal Party wants to promote its agenda based on data from the Census, let their party pay for it,” Dr. Brenner wrote. “Not clear why all taxpayers should subsidize this or any party’s, or any interest groups’ (academics included), agenda.”

According to a list compiled by the website datalibre.ca, 341 organizations and individuals are publicly opposed to the government’s census decision, while 11 support it.

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News

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

5

MUS Frosh theme sparks controversy Abandoned Tribal theme leads to questions of Frosh reform Michael Lee-Murphy The McGill Daily

W

ith public accusations of racism launched at one faculty over a contentious frosh theme, this year's perennial orientation has been marked by a controversy that raises questions of oversight and possible structural changes to frosh in the years to come.

The dispute around the Management Undergraduate Society’s (MUS) Tribal Frosh theme arose several days before frosh festivities were scheduled to start. As part of their publicity for the event, the MUS released a video showing McGill students in costumes and face paint depicting four indigenous tribes -the Maori, Inca, Zulu, and Maasai.

The video immediately drew accusations of racism and cultural insensitivity; on Thursday, August 19, former SSMU Counselor Sarah Woolf posted a call to protest the Tribal Frosh on Facebook. On August 21, she followed up with an online appeal to protest MUS frosh, in which she suggested writing letters to MUS and SSMU executives, as well as to campus media. Some hours later, MUS executives called Woolf to schedule a meeting to discuss the matter.

Irkar Beljaars, producer of CKUT’s Native Solidarity News and a Mohawk himself, attended the meeting.

Beljaars pointed out the heavy drinking that characterizes most frosh activities as a point of contention. “I wanted the organizers to understand that alcoholism -- the battle with the bottle -- is a very big issue in indigenous communities around the world,” he said. Multiple sources have said that the meeting’s atmosphere was tense, and ended abruptly.

The next morning, MUS President Céline Junke posted an apology on

A still from the MUS frosh video at the centre of the controversy. The text at bottom-left reads “ZULU” the MUS website, saying that frosh coordinators “never had any intention of portraying tribes in a disrespectful manner and deeply regrets any offense this may have caused.”

MUS also removed all Tribal Frosh online promotional material and changed its theme to “Superheroes.”

After the theme was changed, Woolf published a note online reading: “congratulations...to MUS for hearing the concerns of McGill students... and responding appropriately. Changing the theme of such a huge event on a few days notice is no easy feat, so a serious tip of my hat to the folks at MUS!” A further dispute arose after outgoing Engineering Undergraduate Society (EUS) president and current

engineering senator Andrew Doyle posted an open letter to Woolf on his Facebook account. The letter, in turn, accused Woolf of racism and of “summon[ing] the Oka Mohawk community to picket Management” and contended that the sole reason for the change of the MUS frosh theme was because of threats or violent protest that Doyle deemed “terrorism.”

Junke says that the claims of threats are not “true in the slightest,” and that the meeting was “respectful.”

Numerous messages sent to Doyle for comment were not returned.

Administration officials have begun to assess both policy and procedural changes following the controversy. The administration has

no application or vetting process for undergraduate society frosh, other than the customary security applications that accompany the booking of all campus space.

Deputy Provost (Student Life and Learning) Morton Mendelson expressed concern about the current system in the wake of this year’s events.

“I am wondering whether or not the situation of frosh, structurally, makes it impossible for students to manage the entire event,” he said, adding that the issue would be discussed at an annual review of firstyear orientation events.

Officials at the office of Student Services were reluctant to discuss

policy changes, but stressed forthcoming changes to the consultative process that accompanies the planning of undergraduate frosh events.

One such change would include the incorporation of McGill’s Social Equity and Diversity Education office (SEDE) into the planning of frosh.

Veronica Amberg, SEDE’s chief coordinator, said that while SEDE’s role in frosh planning is only beginning, her office was “concerned about these recurring froshees,’’ and hoped that SEDE could assist in making frosh “inclusive and non offensive.”

SEDE is scheduled to meet Thursday with the office of Student Services and the McGill First People’s House.

Admin scoops up Marriott for new, new, New Rez Third hotel in seven years costs McGill over 10 million dollars Adam Winer News Writer

T

his past spring, McGill purchased the Courtyard Marriott hotel, with plans to make it the university’s newest student residence.

The building is located at 410 Sherbrooke West, just east of campus. When it opens in the fall of 2011, it will house roughly 270 McGill students. The hotel was bought for a reported 12.3 million dollars, which McGill declined to verify. The purchase of the Marriott represents the third major residential real estate acquisition by McGill this decade, coming after the Renaissance Hotel (now New Residence) in 2003 and the Four

Points Sheraton (now Carrefour Sherbrooke) in 2009.

“The main reason is so that we can make good on our guarantee of housing,” explained Morton Mendelson, Deputy Provost (Student Life and Learning.)

At McGill, housing is guaranteed to all incoming first-year students under the age of 22. Previous real estate acquisitions, including the aforementioned hotels, have also been made in order to secure available housing for incoming students.

Shortage of space in residence has proven troublesome in the past, most notably in the fall of 2008, when a building’s worth of apartment space had to be rented for first-year students lacking housing.

This year, according to Residences Director Michael Porritt,

temporary housing had to be found for approximately 100 students as of move-in day. As in years past, many freshmen (also estimated at nearly 100) had to settle off-campus due to overflow. The newly-acquired Marriott will, when it opens its doors next year, help to accommodate a large number of students for whom housing would not be otherwise available.

By all indications, however, the Marriott is not an all-encompassing solution to McGill’s housing woes. McGill’s undergraduate class has been growing at an annual rate of 1%, roughly 200 students a year, and is projected to continue at this pace for the next two years.

With no major real estate purchases slated for the near future students may still be left looking for

housing options.

McGill’s budget for the 20102011 fiscal year states that, “It has become increasingly difficult to not only sustain McGill’s quality (and its approximate 29,000 students) while positioning the University to enhance its competitiveness in the future, but also to meet our obligation to reduce annual operating deficits and achieve a break-even budget by [fiscal year] 2011.”

Mendelson explained the process behind the purchase.

“The university took out a bond to raise money. The bond was issued with the understanding that all the money raised by the bond would go into projects that created a financial return,” he said.

According to Porritt, the

Residences department serves as a self-sustaining financial system, generating its own revenues each year. “Residences and the University do not purchase anything that we cannot pay for,” he said.

SSMU President Zach Newburgh reflected on the growth of the undergraduate class.

“The SSMU is glad that the university is opening its doors to more and more students, but recognizes that students will be faced with some of the negative consequences that will follow, such as increases in class sizes, fewer opportunities to engage with professors directly, longer wait times with advisors and other administrators, as well as a slew of others,” he said.

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News

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

7

Biking banned on campus Administration stresses pedestrian safety Lendon Ebbels The McGill Daily

S

ince May 28, cyclists have been asked to dismount their bikes across the downtown campus.

While there is no official legislation enforcing the rule, the administration is trying to establish a norm across McGill that prioritizes pedestrian use of space.

“It’s the way we’re trying to manage things, to set expectations. You’re not going to find any document in a green book somewhere that says this is the policy of the University,” said Jim Nicell, Associate VP (University Services).

Nicell has been coordinating many of the sustainability and infrastructure developments on campus.

The change is part of McGill’s master plan to update infrastructure and make lower campus a greener and safer space for pedestrians.

The administration says there have been numerous accidents involving cyclists over the years.

“The reason for making the lower campus a walk-bike zone should be readily apparent: thousands of pedestrians cross McGill’s downtown campus every day, sometimes – especially when classes change – in substantial numbers,” a preliminary document explaining the new

transportation protocols reads.

“Mounted bicycles are incompatible with pedestrian safety,” it continued.

Nicell emphasized the increased ability for pedestrians to take advantage of outdoor space. In addition to the ban on cycling, deliveries are now restricted to between 7 and 11 a.m., parking permits for about 150 vehicles have been transferred elsewhere, and McTavish is now completely car-free.

“We want to bring people off of the sidewalks,” Nicell said. “The idea is to give them more social space.”

The University does not view the no-bike implementation as incompatible with its greening initiatives. The number of bike racks on campus, mostly clustered around entrances, is also being doubled by the end of 2010.

According to the University, it shouldn’t be a big deal to dismount and walk.

“I think a lot of us feel that it’s not a huge compromise,” Nicell said. “To the cyclists, we’re offering them as many parking spots as we can physically fit on the campus. We try to make sure they’re as safe and secure locations as possible. And we’re asking them, as well, to walk the reasonable distance to wherever they’re going.”

As for general public who commute through campus or arrive by bike to enjoy the space, Nicell does

not see any major inconvenience.

“You have a choice to go around [McGill], or you can enjoy us for two more minutes,” he said.

Campus cyclists, however, are less than thrilled. Chuk Plante, a sociology graduate student, cyclist, and volunteer at the Flat, the student bike collective in the Shatner basement, says that the change is misguided at best.

“It’s not an anti-bike policy so much as an overly-reactive safety policy,” he said. “It assumes pedestrians are pretty dumb, and cyclists are pretty careless.”

Plante argues that it further antagonizes the administration in students’ eyes. “The policy makes it seem like the administration is very out of touch,” he said. “As long as it’s in place, [students] interact with the admin every day in a negative way.”

While Plante tends to obey the dismount request and agrees that the new bike racks are helpful, others often speed past security guards. Last Friday night, two disgruntled cyclists on McTavish even tried to steal a “Dismount Your Bike” sign before the guard was able to retrieve it.

Nicell concedes the change can seem harsh at late hours when there are virtually no pedestrians. As the semester begins, the University may look to reduce the hours dur-

Victor Tangermann | The McGill Daily

ing which cyclists must dismount to peak times.

“From a long-term sustainability viewpoint, we need to figure out how we’re going to work with cyclists and put them into the mix with pedestrians,” he said. “We’re trying to find that middle ground... and in this case, compromise on the ability of cyclists to pass through the campus.”

Further concerns have been voiced, however, about a perceived lack of consultation before the protocol’s implementation, which began in earnest this summer, but can be traced back to the construction at the Milton gates that restricted road space over the past

two years.

Though the administration is holding a forum for cyclists and other interested parties September 23, some think it’s coming too late.

Nicell argued that proper consultation was done. He said that the diverse stakeholders involved in weekly planning discussions included avid cyclists, though no students. According to Nicell, several presentations on sustainability, including some to Senate last year, were sufficient, even though the presentations may not have specifically discussed the no-bike rule.

“They probably should have involved people before it was implemented,” Plante said.

Victor Tangermann | The McGill Daily

Commentary

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

8

Express yourself!

Your friendly neighbourhood Commentary editor on opinions and being broke at McGill William M. Burton Comment

W

hen I arrived at McGill four years ago, my selfconsciousness about my family’s social class really sharpened for the first time. Though I grew up in a wealthy town in Massachusetts, I had always had friends who were as poor as my family was. College, where students from wealthier families had suddenly unrestrained budgetary discretion, threw the differences between the working class and other social classes into stark relief. Now I understood just how impoverished we were. No one else seemed to have money problems on the same scale.

Complaints about being broke, for example, rang hollow to me when I knew the person talking would go home to three square meals and secure housing. When I went home, I wasn’t sure there would be enough food there. The meaning of “poor” took on a number of new connotations – some that felt less authentic than others.

That was first year. Things have changed: now I understand the parlous situation even middle-class families find themselves in; friends have revealed the precariousness of their family’s situations; working-class acquaintances have been made; a few discussions on wealth disparities have been held. But as for a campus-wide dialogue on what it means to be from the working-class at a world class university, we’re still lacking that at McGill.

My purpose in writing this article, then, is twofold: I want to open that dialogue, and I want to welcome all my readers to the Commentary section. Commentary is the part of The Daily where you can express yourself, no matter who you are. And it’s an especially vital place for those people who feel like their perspectives are not talked about, or whose lives are too often discussed by others – others who may not have those lived experiences. Whether you’re aboriginal and you want to speak for yourself, rather than be spoken for; or a person with disability, who prefers to speak out, instead of being spoken about; or anybody else for that matter – Commentary’s for you.

Studying at university puts poor students in a profoundly ambiguous position. Without the cash to be truly middle-class, but with too much education to feel very working-class, we are thrust into a liminal zone – between social castes, but still subject to their irresistible gravitational pull no matter where we go. At school, my ignorance about certain aspects of life betrayed my origins to my peers. (For example, I didn’t know what an avocado was until my second year.) At home, my interests and manner of speaking made me feel a traitor. My parents,

both supportive and loving, didn’t exactly understand what I studied as an undergrad. As a consequence, communication about our lives became increasingly difficult. We inhabited two entirely separate discursive universes.

Like a lot of people associated with leftism, I would criticize bourgeois culture and denigrate middleclass aspirations. At the same time, my career goals took on an increasingly upwardly mobile orientation.

When you’ve grown up without a stable home, embarrassed by your second-hand clothes, your mother mortified at the difficulties she’s encountered in providing for you and your siblings, your dreams are modest – even conservative. Middleclass life starts to look pretty appealing, even as it feels increasingly like a cop-out. Trapped in the fissures of conflicting class loyalties, I couldn’t take the label of “privileged” lightly, even if it wasn’t malicious or wrong.

It’s not like being co-opted by consumer culture hadn’t concerned me before. But to feel accused of privilege – to feel attacked for the legitimate desire to rise above the poverty of my childhood – irked me.

Leftist discourse on campus too frequently fails to take into account the existence of working-class students at McGill and their valid urge to leave behind their caste. For a poor kid to buy into bourgeois culture and values lock, stock, and barrel might be tragic, but it’s also understandable.

I’m not writing to attack anyone, because I don’t think critiques of bourgeois culture are motivated by animus. On the contrary – I’m on the same page. But I find the campus media’s near-total lack of discussion of class issues – especially from a personal angle – suffocating. For four years, I wondering if anyone else felt the way I did. When a writer approached me last year to propose a column on working-class life at university, I was elated to find affirmation for once.

That affirmation was important.

And that’s what I want Commentary to be for – for affirmation and exploration, for self-expression and critique. Everyone’s welcome to write, and I especially want to solicit the participation of people from marginalized communities. Not that I want to discourage those with privilege from writing – on the contrary, write as much as you want.

But nothing trumps the first-person experience – so if you feel like problems facing you or the group you’re a part of just don’t get (accurate) coverage, then drop me a line. This is your paper.

Hope to hear from you soon.

William M. Burton is The Daily’s Commentary & Compendium! editor, BA ’10 Lettres et traduction françaises and currently a special student, he can be reached at commentary@mcgilldaily.com.

What is commentary?

D

o you want to start a dialogue? Make sure your voice is heard? Commentary’s the place to do it. Below you’ll find a list of the types of articles we publish and the process for getting something published. Hope to hear from you soon!

Hyde Park – We call opinion pieces in The Daily Hyde Parks, after the park in London known for mass demonstrations and soapbox speeches. Whether you want to rally the troops for a demo or just air your ideas in the public forum, Hyde Parks are your best bet. Word count should be between 500 and 600 words.

Two Cents – Two Cents are short, punchy opinion pieces.

They should be dense, concise, witty and polemical. 125-300 words. Only for experienced commentary writers.

1. Think of an idea. Email it to commentary@mcgilldaily.com for some direction. Alternatively, email the Commentary editor looking for inspiration. Or join the Commentary Google Group by sending an email to the editor with the subject line “Google Group.” He’ll send out pitches periodically.

2. Research! Conduct interviews, read articles, do whatever you need to substantiate and fortify your arguments.

Read the Commentary writers’ guide for pointers.

3. Write a rough draft of your article.

Send it to commentary@mcgilldaily.com, The Conversation – The along with your preferred name and Conversation is a monthly diaemail address, year, and program, and logue-based commentary piece some title suggestions (if you want). in which two students dissect an Articles must be received no later than issue. Look for one in an issue the Sunday before production night. soon!

Deadlines and word limits are strictly enforced: late articles and those over Columnists – Each year, the word limit may not be published.

The Daily gives space to col- (Example: If you had an article comumnists: two weekly writ- ing out on Monday, September 6, the ers, two biweekly, as well as rough draft should be sent by Sunday, one writing in French for August 29.) beginners. They’re the pillars of the Commentary section. 4. Work on your piece with the comFor more information about mentary editor. Depending on the how to become a columnist, see page nine. amount of work that needs doing, your article might be held for a bit.

Readers’ Advocate – The Readers’ Advocate weighs stu5. Sit back and let the dialogue begin. dent concerns against their own assessment of the paper’s performance in a biweekly column. See page nine for more information.

Letters – Anyone can send a letter to The Daily about any subject – in response to an article, to another letter, to an event happening (covered in our pages or not). We pledge to publish any letter sent by a McGill student from their McGill email address, except those using hateful language (racist, sexist, classist, et cetera). Send your 300-word or less communiqués to letters@mcgilldaily.com.

Illustrations: Olivia Messer | The McGill Daily

Commentary

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Bikes deserve a place on campus Niko Block Comment

T

here is something decisively anarchic about bikes. It’s not just the tattoos and the tanktops and bandanas that I’m talking about: bikers ignore just about every traffic signal, we pull ridiculous moves to avoid putting our feet down at a red light, we flip off drivers at every available opportunity, and the whole bike economy is second-hand and DIY. Simply put, the bike has something that the capitalist car and the socialist subway lack, and I love that thing enough to get angry when it’s taken away from me. So my initial reaction to the bike riding ban on campus was that it was implemented not on the basis of the threat they pose to people’s safety, but because of what they represent: that the administration’s main objective is to transform campus into a postcard rather than a public space.

It has, after all, created an antagonistic relationship between students and security guards, pissed off most of my friends, and caused many of us to lose faith in the motives behind its traffic-reduction initiative. It’s bad enough that this campus is designed like a gated community to begin with; now each of its three access points are now monitored by someone threatening to knock you off your bike with a baton.

Bike traffic has been a thorn in McGill’s side for as long as I’ve attended this school. This was mainly the result of an faulty urban plan that led bikers from Mile End down the bike lane on Parc, then down Hutchison and along Milton to University, from which point they had nowhere to go but through campus to get to the downtown core. Associate VicePrincipal (University Services) Jim Nicell told me in a recent inter-

view that according to a study by Vélo Québec, on any given weekday morning, 3,000 bikes entered campus through the Milton Gates and 2,500 left through the Roddick Gates. Only 500 stayed on campus.

This was the rationale behind the construction of a bike path along University between Sherbrooke and Milton. But the admin categorically refused to wait and see if things would improve, instead opting for a total ban within three months of that bike path’s completion.

Yet it wouldn’t be entirely fair of me to paint the admin as a diabolical campus-zoning tyrant. I do appreciate the expansion of bike parking on campus, and I applaud them especially for working so enthusiastically and effectively with the long-standing student campaign for a car-free campus. These are real and positive projects that the admin has undertaken.

(Most frustrating of all in my investigation of how this came about was the revelation that both of the admin’s representatives I talked to are themselves bikers.

Will they never just let us remorselessly hate them?)

Nicell did convince me that the University’s primary concern here is student safety. He mentioned that in the three years he’s spent at his current job, his office has received several reports of pedestrians being hit by cyclists, and not a single one about a motor vehicle doing the same. He himself was clipped by a cyclist flying through campus earlier this summer – his computer was knocked to the ground and the guy rode on. And that does suck. Even I feel pretty confident that some day one of those oblivious bikers riding down the left side of the road will put me in crutches for a while.

What it comes down to is that the admin has lost its faith in the ability of the pedestrian and the biker to co-exist harmoniously.

Rana Encol Comment

P

eople say that there are two sides to every story. But I’ve come to understand that this perception stems from personal interest: there’s “our side” and then there’s everyone else’s. Bias develops when we have a certain interest in something. All of the sudden, everything enters black-and-white terms. Somebody walks away and you think they’re giving you the cold shoulder.

I’m sipping Coca-Cola to avoid slamming beers and I’m smoking a cigarette to ward off stress. But the world is never a choice between two options: this is a false dilemma.

There is always a third option on the table – catching up with friends instead of sitting at home alone is one example. Shunning excess consumption when it’s wounding your potential to create is another.

Just as there is a third option, there are not two, but many sides to

Do you want to write opinion pieces every week or every other week?

Think you can churn out a thoughtprovoking, wellresearched, 500-600word article every week or so?

Apply to be a columnist!

To apply, send a letter of intent and three 500-word(ish) columns to commentary@mcgilldaily.com by September 17.

The letter of intent should lay out your column’s project: What are your guiding principles? What issues will you discuss? What will your method be? Why? It should also indicate whether you want a weekly or a twice-monthly column. You can throw in some column title ideas, as well, though that can be decided later.

Victor Tangermann | The McGill Daily

A sign on the boom gates near Milton for deliveries.

The admin’s online FAQ on cycling emphasizes the infeasibility of returning to the good old days more or less because “once pedestrians become accustomed to the reduced amount of vehicular traffic on campus, we believe the risk of such injuries would increase, should cyclists be permitted to circulate as in the past.”

These arguments scarcely affect my opinion that this approach is misguided, excessive, that we were not given adequate warning, and

Beyond the black and white a story. Classic comics tend to carve the world into the good guys and the bad eggs. But then again, there are also many bad guys and good women cooking eggs for breakfast – hence film noir and hardboiled fiction: the idea that if you’re going to characterize people as good or evil, you realize with time that there are many degrees in between. And when you know someone very well, you don’t even try to place them on a scale. They stand alone.

Stories are equally unique. The more people involved, the more complex they get. The beauty of a newspaper story is that it never really ends: it grows and develops with time. If you write for a newspaper, you’ll get to meet some pretty interesting characters. Who knows, you might meet some sleazy politician who’s actually pretty funny, a literary hero who turns out to be another soapbox ego, and plenty of students who have interesting lives beyond their studies. Possibly the most satisfying experience for a writer is having the chance to speak

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with someone who really inspires them – and that’s when you know that “good news” also has its place in the press.

Although the media certainly keeps a close eye on the “people in power,” it does not exist primarily to quarrel with them or fight the proverbial man, as those skeptical of “alternative” or “independent” media may assume. I believe that the primary role and motivation for those who work in media should be positive as opposed to antagonistic: to shed light on a debate, to provide readers with interesting content, and to empower and strengthen the community within which they exist.

And if there is one fight worth having, it is for an individual’s freedom to express, create, and communicate. Some people say that free media is the future; I say it’s here and now.

Rana Encol is a Daily News editor.

She’s also a U3 English literature student. Write her at rana.encol@ gmail.com.

that they’ve dismissed certain planning alternatives out of hand. Speed bumps or a bike path would both contribute tremendously to controlling the flow of bikes through campus. Bikes are unwieldy animals from an organizational perspective, but they are not the inherent menace the administration has made them out to be.

Niko Block is The Daily’s Features editor and a U3 History student.

Write him at nikoblock@gmail.com.

While applying, you should bear The Daily’s Statement of Principles in mind. You can find it at mcgilldaily.com/SoP. For more information and help preparing your columnist application, send an email to commentary@mcgilldaily.com or drop on by the office (Room B-24 in the Shatner building). Ask for Will.

On est aussi à la recherche d’une rédactrice ou d’un rédacteur francophone pour écrire une chronique bimensuelle pour les débutants en français.

The Daily is looking for a readers’ advocate.

What?

The readers’ advocate (RA) will write a twice-monthly column that weighs student concerns against the RA’s own assessment of the paper’s performance.

Who? Unless you’re on The Daily’s editorial board, you can apply for this position.

Tell me more.

The ideal candidate will be passionate about The Daily and reader response. They will have an understanding of and/or willingness to learn about The Daily and its Statement of Principles (SoP). Some possible tasks of the readers’ advocate could include: reader surveys and interviews; thematic columns on events covered in The Daily; critiques of how The Daily lives up to its principles; judging of the relevance of the SoP and The Daily to the student body.

How do I become the readers’ advocate?

The RA will be chosen by the editorial board of the DPS. Submit your applications before September 25. Send an email to commentary@mcgilldaily.com for more information.

Science+Technology

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

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Martian microbes, maybe Canadian scientists get involved in looking at possible biosignatures of life on Mars Shannon Palus The McGill Daily

K

imberly Strong has spent much of her career as a scientist at the University of Toronto looking at the Earth’s atmosphere. Now she’s looking for signs of life on Mars.

Along with an international group of scientists, Strong submitted a proposal to NASA and the European Space Agency (ESA) for an instrument they had developed to be on board the Mars Trace Gas Orbiter (MTGO). MTGO is the first step in the ExoMars mission, a NASA and ESA collaboration. Early in August, it was announced that the instrument Strong and her team created – the Mars Atmospheric Trace Molecule Occultation Spectrometer (MATMOS) – was among the five chosen, out of 19 proposals.

The resulting press is splashy.

“Searching for life on Mars,” reads the headline from InsideToronto. com. “MATMOS will probe the red planet’s atmosphere for biological sources of methane,” says a line in the Globe and Mail.

But the coverage is misleading: MATMOS, which will not land on Mars, is not in search of organisms themselves. Martian life, if it exists, would likely be anaerobic microbes – which survive in the absence of oxygen – that take refuge underground from the planet’s harsh surface. Not little green men, not intelligent beings – and not something flying around in the atmosphere where MATMOS could crash into it.

As it orbits the planet, MATMOS will collect data on methane, first discovered on Mars in 2003, by looking through the atmosphere at sunrise and sunset. The methane in the Martian atmosphere might be a biosignature – a phenomenon produced by something living – or it might exist in patterns that indicate a geological origin.

I called Strong while she was in Australia, working on a project to measure carbon dioxide in the Arctic in collaboration with a few of her MATMOS teammembers.

“It all kind of ties together,” Strong said of her work as a whole. Her graduate work dealt

with Jupiter’s atmosphere, so she’s excited to be doing planetary research again.

I asked her what the most exciting find of the MATMOS data could be.

“It would be absolutely amazing if we had conclusive evidence that the methane was coming from a biological source,” she said.

Definitive evidence of life on Mars?

“Yes, that would be the point of the mission.”

Later, in a phone conversation with Jorge Vago, an ExoMars scientist from ESA who spoke to me from his office in the Netherlands.

I asked about the methane evidence. Could it be conclusive of Martian life?

Vago was cautious: “Look, ‘conclusive’ is a very tall word.

‘Conclusive’ is in the eye of the beholder.” He explained that if the data from the orbiter were to indicate a biological source, there would be several steps and missions that would need to follow to confirm what was found.

“If anything, I hope the mission will be able to find results that point to a possible life origin, if we are lucky, and then people will be fighting over this for a number of years. And slowly, some sort of consensus may emerge,” said Vago.

Like many frontiers of science these days, looking for signs of life has encouraged cooperation among Earth’s own inhabitants.

While the early days of space travel, from Sputnik to the race for the moon, pitted nations against each other, national space agencies are now looking to reach milestones together.

“We have finite resources,” said Strong, referring to the space exploration community as a whole.

“These are challenging missions.

The more we can work together, the better it is, really.”

ESA and NASA, once sending separate missions to Mars, are now sharing their resources for the joint ExoMars mission. The mission’s MGTO segment is slated for launch in 2016 and another component involving a pair of rovers is slated for 2018.

Other organizations will contribute smaller technological components. A large portion of MATMOS, including key pieces of the instrument’s hardware, which is contracted to the engi-

All illustrations by Matt Milne | The McGill Daily

If life exists on Mars, it’s probably taking refuge far below the surface. neering company ABB Bomem of Quebec City, will be funded by the Canadian Space Agency (CSA).

Paying for space exploration is expensive, but Canada’s bill for MATMOS is, as Strong put it, “peanuts compared to the G20.”

“All this space exploration, you should look at it a bit as a longterm investment on the future of human kind,” Vago said.

Vago thinks the justification for the cost is clearer for the ExoMars mission than for others. A mission geared towards looking for signs of life, Vago explained, could have practical implications for geology. Finding life on Mars would be helpful in understanding the origins of life on our own planet.

Mars is pristine: there are no tectonic plates folding rocks back into a molten core and erasing the planet’s historical record - essential information about the genesis of life.

Last Thursday, I sat down with Hojatollah Vali in his office at McGill, and talked about the possibility of life on Mars and space travel. Vali is an associate professor

who studies bacteria and teaches an astrobiology course in the winter semester.

He elaborated on the implications of finding life on Mars, suggesting that examining life on Mars would also help us discover if life has universal components.

Did life evolve uniquely on Earth, or is it the cousin of life elsewhere?

I asked him why we should put money into planetary studies, why it’s in a nation’s interest to spend money to go and explore and figure these things out. He laughed. “I struggle with this,” he said.

He pause, and leaned back in his chair. “Can we justify airplanes that go and kill people? Whatever we learn [on Mars] will make us a better people, instead of going to destroy things.”

Funding is still an issue for space exploration. The sample return mission scheduled for ExoMars in the 2020s is the kind of thing that keeps getting pushed back.

Sample return is one more step toward, someday, sending astronauts. Scientists like Strong and her

team can do much of their work remotely with satellites, but a crewed mission still holds a certain kind of wonder, a “let’s see if we can do this” appeal.

Vali mused that if we look at humans as the long-term goal, there are practical applications to be seen in a crewed Mars mission.

In the distant future, civilization could expand to Mars and beyond.

If Earth no longer suited or supported human life, we wouldn’t have to downsize. We could go other places – to other planets.

As my conversation with Vali wrapped up, I offered my line about how much things have changed since the space race, and expressed my support of space agencies’ widespread cooperation. He looked unenthused. He says the CSA contributes to NASA projects because their budget is too small for the organization to operate solo. He’s disappointed that CSA is stuck footing the bill for construction of instruments for other organizations’ projects – like the robotic arm they built for the International Space Station, a laser for NASA’s Phoenix Mars lander, and now MATMOS for ExoMars. In not conducting their own, independent experiments, they’re shying away from pure science.

“Their mandate is really technology,” said Vali. “I hope we could spend more on research.”

Disorientation Guide 2010 Welcome to McGill, sonny. I know you’re greener than the grass you’re using this paper to roll your reefers with, but I’d pay attention if it was me in those shoes. McGill can have you hittin’ the books hard and slugging down stagger syrup to forget it all. We can show you how to get the grades and where to get the giggle juice.

Visual content by Olivia Messer and Victor Tangermann.

Contents

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Around Town Night Owls

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Cheap Eats Study Up

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Arts at McGill Athletics

6

Montreal Map

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Boilers & Zoomcycles Hideouts

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Public Places in Montreal French at McGill

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People in Power Student Groups Student Services Religion

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Around Town The Yellow Door | 3625 Aylmer A volunteer-run community space offering programs for seniors, a performance venue, and meals for students in need.

Boite Noire | 376 Mont-Royal E./380 Laurier O. With locations in Mile End and the Plateau, Boite Noire offers a range of unusual and underappreciated films organized by director.

Drawn & Quarterly | 211 Bernard O. The best selection of comics and graphic novels in town, many of them by local artists. They also run courses in media like screen printing, and provide internships for budding cartoonists.

Red Bird Studios | 135 Van Horne O. A collective providing studio space for artists and fantastic shows for enthusiasts. Currently showcasing a retrospective of poster artist Jack Dylan, a trailblazer in promoting the Montreal music scene.

Ruelle Savoie | Between Berri and St. Denis A tiny alleyway near the Bibliothèque Nationale and St. Denis, this haven of used books is predominantly francophone. Keep those peepers open, though – English-language gems can be

found among the antiques. Through October 3, they’ll be open Fridays (17:00 to 22:00), Saturdays (12:00 to 22:00), and Sundays (12:00 to 18:00).

Parisian Laundry | 3550 St. Antoine O. Exciting installation art gallery in a large well-restored industrial space.

The Word | 469 Milton The best option for buying and selling used textbooks. This Milton veteran carries secondhand books of every genre imaginable, and a wide range of local fiction journals.

Markets Jean-Talon (7070 Henri Julien) and Atwater (138 Atwater) are the major players, selling local produce and specialties and with more free samples than you can fit in your bindle. Numerous local small markets spring up around the city in the summer – check out McGill’s Farmers’ Market and Campus Crops for produce and baked goods, and Marché La Récré (5840 St. Urbain) for vintage items and crafts.

Tam-Tams | Parc Mont-Royal If the streets seem suspiciously quiet on a Sunday afternoon, it’s because the whole city is at the foot of Mount Royal for the weekly tam-fest. Or at least, that’s what it seems like when you can’t breathe for weed fumes, or hear for drum beats. The quintessential Montreal summer activity.

Cinema du Parc | 3575 Parc Blockbusters nestle inconspicuously on the timetable among foreign and arthouse movies. Take your best dame out to a talkie every night of the week with a $8 student rate.

Night Owls Casa del Popolo/Sala Rossa | 4848 St. Laurent/4873 St. Laurent The main dishes in a city of side-order music venues.

These sister hotspots host a good number of today’s more acclaimed indie-acts.

Barfly | 4062 St. Laurent Once dubbed “the best watering-hole in Montreal without a patio”, this gritty box serves up blues, booze, bluegrass, and folk every night of the week. Don’t miss Sunday bluegrass.

Il Motore | 179 Jean-Talon O. This dimly-lit house of indie in the north end of town compliments its musical acts with an industrial ambiance. Nearby Bombay Mahal can serve as the perfect spicy side-dish to your night.

Wheel Club | 3373 Cavendish Six nights a week it’s members only, but Mondays this authentic honky tonk throws open its doors to a mix of west end hipsters and committed country fans who enjoy the old time crooning, cheap brews, and free licorice.

Le Black Jack | 3814 Notre-Dame O. A good old-fashioned drum. Notorious for its fourlitre pitchers and kitschy strip-club/sports-bar look, Le Black Jack makes a good excuse to visit all those tightjeaned friends out in St. Henri. Check out the legendary Thursday night post-punk DJ night Time’s Up around the corner at Resto-Bar St-Jacques (4210 St. Jacques O.) while you’re in the ‘hood.

Les Verres Sterilisées | 800 Rachel E. At less than seven berries a pitcher, you won’t need to rob any banks to drink in this, shall we say, eclectic, spot. Share with your friends and you’ll save even more bones. Notice anything strange about the portraits above the bar?

Les Bobards | 4328 St. Laurent Boasting themed dance nights, live music, and DJs with infectious international playlists, Bobards is the ideal place to sample world music on the Plateau.

Ste. Élisabeth |1412 Ste. Élisabeth This British-style pub has a secluded back patio makes it a “splendid” drinking spot during Montreal’s warmer seasons.

Le Divan Orange | 4234 St. Laurent Though you won’t find orange couches in this cavernous watering hole, it’s not hard to enjoy the music, comedy, and affordable beer on offer.

The Playhouse | 5656 Parc Friday nights, this former strip-club hosts the community queer-posi dance parties “Faggity Ass Fridays” and “UpYours!” A suggested donation of $10 buys you an infectious blend of Le Tigre and Miley Cyrus.

La Petite Idée Fixe | 4857 Parc Five-dollar big 50s and a karaoke machine make this dive a credible alternative to spending your nights brooding at diner counter tops and lurking in the backalley shadows.

Café Cleopatra | 1230 St. Laurent After three years of city efforts to evict Café Cleopatra and make it part of a new office complex, this 100-something year-old show bar still puts on some of the most original burlesque and drag shows in town. Learn more about Café Cleo and its fight to protect Montreal’s red light district at savethemain.com.

Microbreweries You want your hooch local? Drop by one of these speakeasies where they brew it on site. McAuslan Brewery (5080 St. Ambroise), Dieu du Ciel (29 Laurier O.), and Réservoir (9 Duluth E.) stand out.

Village Bars The storied Village bars deserve exploration. Take one of the following as a starting point: Sky Pub (1474 Ste. Catherine E.) and Unity (1171 Ste. Catherine E.) are gay dance clubs that attract diverse crowds (mostly gay males).

Cabaret Mado (1115 Ste. Catherine E.), modeled after its legendary owner, Mado Lamothe, offers the most impressive drag in the Village. Le Drugstore (1366 Ste. Catherine E.), a multi-story lesbian bar sporting a 60s-lesbian-pulpnovel-look, is one of the busiest of the few Village bars geared especially toward a lesbian scene.

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Cheap Eats McGill Pizza | 625 Milton A hash house with fry-ups coming out the yin yang, and the staff won’t give you the third degree if you turn up at 7 a.m. looking like you rode the mechanical bull with Dracula all night. Breakfast dished up until midnight.

Cagibi | 5490 St. Laurent Serves its coffee hot and its chili cheap. Duck away from the mean streets of Mile End in this dual study lounge and experimental music venue, but take note: you’ll have to get your nicotine fix elsewhere, since Cagibi’s smokes machine only stocks independently produced zines.

The Midnight Kitchen | SSMU building, third floor Even if you don’t like cooking food, there’s no way you don’t like chowing down on it. The Midnight Kitchen is a collective run by students, and anyone can join in making (and eating) the daily vegan banquets. Food is served daily at 12 p.m. on a pay-as-you-can basis.

The People’s Potato | 1455 de Maisonneuve O., seventh floor Concordia’s version of the Midnight Kitchen, but bigger.

Romados | 101 Rachel E. Montreal’s Portuguese chicken is one of its great culinary assets, and Romados is one of the best places to find it. Be prepared for the line-up, though, and don’t plan any activity afterwards until you’ve given yourself a good couple hours to digest. Try out the natas while you wait for your frango.

Bagels etc. | 4320 St. Laurent This place has an enormous breakfast menu, ranging from the delicious Mexican huevos rancheros to the opulent Monte Cristo sandwich. If you’re trying to reign in expenses, or just feeling old-fashioned, the Classique is as good a breakfast meal as any, and for under five-bucks, beats everything else on the menu for price. We just wish they’d include the coffee. Make sure to check out their enormous selection of indie hot sauces, and keep an eye

out for Leonard Cohen. According to his autograph on the wall, he’ll vouch for Bagels etc. as a “good place to sit.”

Patati Patata | 4177 St. Laurent Their tiny burgers pack a whallop of taste, and it’s a heavyweight in the fight for the city’s best poutine.

Bombay Mahal | 1001 Jean-Talon O. Cheese it to Parc Extension, famed in the city for its Indian food. The best selection is at Jean-Talon and Stuart, of which Bombay Mahal is the bee’s knees, the head honcho, the cat’s meow, and all that jazz.

AA | 3702 Notre-Dame O. The greasiest in a block famed for its greasy spoons, AA serves up old-fashioned Quebec diner standards in huge portions. Their incredibly rich poutine has the added bonus of being veggie.

Winter in Montreal can be colder than the broad that turned you down for that hinky nance last night. Check out these places for delivery.

Alto’s | (514) 844-9898 | altorestaurantinc.supersites.ca Has everything, and delivers quickly.

Chef On Call | (514) 844-2044 | chefoncalldelivery.com Run by students, with a range of meals you wouldn’t expect from a delivery service, including meal-sized salads.

Boustan | (514) 843-3576 | boustan.ca Lebanese food, delivery ‘til 4a.m., better than Basha.

New System | (514) 932-1484 | newsystembbq.com Delicious BBQ chicken from a St. Henri mainstay.

Maison Kam Fung | 1111 St. Urbain Located on the second floor of a mall masquerading as an office building, is Chinatown’s biggest dim sum restaurant. Go with friends to sample dough fried in many different ways from the remarkably efficient trolley service.

Super Sandwich | Cartier building basement, 1115 Sherbrooke O. A dep with a difference in an office block on Peel, serving a wide range of subs and a meal combo that’ll save you a whole bundle of dough.

Study Up Arts Café | 201 Fairmount O. You’ve probably heard how Montreal is full of small, trendy cafes where writers and artists and CBC types hobnob and discuss important issues. So listen bo, we’ll make picking a study café easy for you: go to Arts Café. Why? Bottomless, serve-yourself coffee is one thing. A pleasant patio with internet access and ashtrays for your butts is another. And if you shack up there all afternoon, chances are good that by the time evening comes and you’re getting sick of paper-writing and studying, the place will play host to a small poetry reading or concert. Once you blow the joint, stop by nearby Fairmount Bagels on your way home.

Architecture Café | Macdonald-Harrington Basement If McGill was a sitcom, this would be one of the sets. It’s the perfect campus café – small, cozy, with mismatched furniture and exposed brick walls. The Jamaican patties are vegetarian and damn good, and if you bring your own cup, they won’t chisel your wallet on the coffee. Crowding is the only draw-back – if you go during the roll-over between classes, it’s a gashouse finding a seat. That, and the fact that the University staged a hostile take-over of the place a couple years ago, killing one of the last hold outs

of student-managed food services on campus. At least arch students still run the day-to-day grind.

CCA [Canadian Centre for Architecture] | 1920 Baile The Shaughnessy House, part of the Canadian Centre for Architecture, isn’t one of Montreal’s most frequented study holes. Its location at Baile and St. Marc makes it bit of a hike from campus, and its opening hours (closed Mondays and Tuesdays, open till 9 p.m. on Thursdays and 6 p.m. the rest of the week) don’t always jive with students’ schedules. But it’s worth coming out for the bright 19 century interiors, the free wi-fi, and the beanbag chairs, not to mention the adjoining centre’s fresh exhibits on architecture’s coolest cats. Free with student ID. Birks | 3520 University The only truly silent study-spot on campus, thanks to the shushing efforts of bearded, union-activist librarian Alan Youster. And try not to love the gothic interior, with high, arched, sun-filled windows, and wooden floors (take off your shoes at the door). It’s as close as McGill gets to the Hogwarts experience. Alas, this is strictly a day-time studyspot – most days it closes at six. What a grift.

GIS Library | Burnside The opposite of Birks – this is one of the only study spaces on campus where you don’t need your library voice.

Sometimes you may need that peace and quiet, but for group projects or just study comraderie, this scatter is the best.

Schulich | Macdonald-Stewart Library Building Not just for science students, this spacious, modern library remains an undiscovered treasure to most non-Schulich types. And if you bring along your headphones, you can find pretty much anything in their enormous CD collection to study to.

Blackader | MacLennan Library Complex How on earth does a library like any other get a hipster rep? We’re not sure, but it happened, and there’s no denying the average pant in Blackader clings closer to its owner’s leg than most other places on campus (except maybe the Arch Café). Besides making you feel like you’re at a Vice do, though, this library has big, spacious desks, huge windows, and generally serves as a respite from the crushing stressfest that is the rest of McLennan. Through the door behind the reserves desk and up the stairs.

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Arts at McGill Tuesday Night Café Theatre (TNC) | Morrice Hall Secreted away on the first floor of Morrice Hall, this student-run theatre company showcases a mix of internationally acclaimed and student-written plays. A seating capacity of 50 lets you get cosy with your fellow twists and hombres.

Players’ Theatre | Shatner Building This non-profit ensemble presents four plays annually in Montreal’s oldest English black-box theatre, as well as hosting the exclusively student-written and directed McGill Drama Festival (MDF).

Twice annually, The McGill English department lights up the stage in grand style with the help of two theatre professors.

Athletics Exercise Detective work is demanding. You need the agility for snoopin’, the quickness to run from roughs, and the strength to fight ‘em off.

McGill’s sports complex has it all.

You might not be in top shape yet, but you already got what it takes to get in. For 25 clams more a semester, they’ll let you into the McGill Sports Centre, no questions asked.

Intramural sports You’re the sporty type, but ain’t about to be tied down to a varsity team. Maybe you and your pals still want to get together and beat on some jabronis. McGill’s intramural sports program lets you duke it out in leagues, including co-recreational leagues for dukes and dames together. For the lone gunmen out there, there are free agent meetings in early September to join up with others looking to take down the competition.

Fitness and recreation courses You ain’t up to snuff on the things you wanna be doin’. McGill Athletics has fitness and recreation classes, including introductory sports instruction, dance, and martial arts classes for dust-ups with goons.

You’ll have to cough up some dough, but full-time undergraduate McGill students get in for cheap.

McGill varsity sporting events If you’re just gonna stake out a sporting event, McGill varsity sports ain’t no speakeasy. If you’re on the nut, games are free or under five

bones. Join Red Thunder, the fan group, which organizes tailgate parties, pep rallies, and trips to McGill away games, if you’re the kinda cat who likes to get into it. And if you’re done playing in sleazy dive bars, grab your gear, and join up with the McGill Fight Band.

Swimming When you’re on the run from the heat, Montreal’s got swimming spots all over and it ain’t gonna cost you zilch. Pools in Parc Jarry (on Jarry and St. Laurent), Parc Laurier (on Laurier and Brébeuf ), and Parc Georges-Étienne-Cartier (close to Place St. Henri) are free.

If you live in the neighbourhood, the YMCA pool is free. If you got fire in your heart and whisky in your blood, you can go poolhopping behind Royal Victoria Hospital (on Mount Royal) under the cover of darkness.

Ice skating If you’re in a dizzy with your baby, but your funds are on ice with your bo, take ‘em to one of the free outdoor skating rinks. Parc Lafontaine is a popular joint that’s got a large skating surface and ponds for pickup hockey games. Beaver Lake atop Mount Royal is a sight to see, but it ain’t easy to get there by the streetcar or the train. Parc Jeanne-Mance is close to downtown and the Plateau, but unlike Parc Lafontaine and Beaver Lake, they don’t have skate rentals on site. Be sure to go in the winter or else you’ll be on thin ice.

Arts Undergraduate Theatre Society | Moyse Hall In their most recent production, AUTS presented a glamorous rendition of the musical Cabaret in Moyse Hall. The upcoming season is not to be missed.

Schulich Productions | Strathcona Music Building Classical music lovers ought to squirrel away the spondulix by checking out Schulich’s cheap or free student concerts.

Student Choirs You songbirds out there can find your flock in one of McGill’s choirs – Simply Sweetly, New Earthly Voices, The McGill Community Gospel Choice, Effusion, Tonal Ecstasy, and Soulstice.

Student Arts Mags McGill’s behind the eight-ball in the way of fine ahts, but it’s chock full of places to publish your creative work. Don’t be a schmuck and wait ‘til your last semester of university to publish in Steps, The Veg, Scrivener, and Folio.

Cinema Politica Cinema Politica promotes global awareness by screening documentaries relating to socio-political problems. Get a slant every Tuesday at 6:30 p.m. in Leacock room 26.

Dance Groups Dames and fellas won’t have a hard time toe-tapping at McGill with so many dance clubs around, including: Dance Pak, Inertia Modern Dance Collective, Mosaica Dance Company, Scottish Highland Dance Society, Swing Kids Society, Urban Groove Hip-Hop Ensemble.

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Neighbourhoods Once we spill the low-down on all the spots around town, it’s up to you to decide where you’re gonna run when you need to make a clean sneak.

Côte-des-Neiges (CDN) Right next to Westmount, but feels miles away. Jewish, Filipino, West Indian and South Asian communities live side by side under the shadow of St. Joseph’s Oratory’s enormous green dome – the third biggest in the world.

Notre-Dame-de-Grâce (NDG) Head west and find this old-style Anglo ‘hood full of leafy streets, old houses, and young families, where West Indian joints rub up against yoga studios. Here’s where you’ll find the best honky-tonks north of the 49th.

Westmount You need a lotta cabbage to make it in this (technically independent) town. Signs here are in English and the streets are lined with shiny rides and big stone houses. Home to many of the province’s most famous and infamous, like McGill Principal Heather Munroe-Blum and Quebec premier Jean Charest.

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St. Henri Home to late-night greasy spoons and cheap gin joints, St. Henri is moving on up. Crumbling factories sit around the corner next to picture-pretty parks and, of course, McGill’s Solin Hall residence. Drop some dough on picnic food at the Atwater market and head west along the Lachine canal for the best of post-industrial revitalization.

Pte. St. Charles and Verdun The Point is like a small town straight outta 1950, and a good place to get off the beaten track. Nice parks, nice houses, nice people. Head a little further south to Verdun, and the St. Lawrence shore is a dream.

You can swim, but no guarantees about the water quality.

Concordia Ghetto Some of the nicest poured concrete high-rises this side of 1973 hide killer eats and the bright lights and big sounds of Crescent.

Hide out at the Canadian Centre for Architecture on René-Levesque or chat up some Concordia kids and find out what that place down the street is really like.

The Old Port Guidebooks usually call the Old Port “European,” but the similarities begin and end at being old and expensive. The Quebec flags and kitschy moose-themed merchandise in every other window can be a bit overwhelming, but you can’t argue that it looks nice. Come down for Nuit Blanche in winter for music and art on the docks.

7 Park Extension (Parc Ex) Cross the tracks from Mile End for cheap rents and good grub from across the globe – Indian and Greek play leading roles, but try out one of the West African restaurants too.

Outremont Très charmant. A francophone mirror image of Westmount, Outremont is the domain of UdeM profs, much of Quebec’s political and intellectual elite, and a fastgrowing Hasidic population. The restaurants along Bernard and Van Horne are as tasty as they are pricey (très).

Little Italy The espresso is strong, the cannoli is fresh, and you don’t have to be famiglia to relax on one of the terraces along St. Laurent. Check out the amazing Jean-Talon Market for veggies on the cheap.

Rosemont A huge swatch stretching across the north-east of the city, Rosemont is a pretty low-key, but altogether pleasant area. Cinéma Beaubien (2396 Beaubien E.) is an awesome old-style movie house.

Mile-End This is the land of Hasidim and hipsters, who flock here for good bagels, nice houses, and some of Montreal’s best music venues, restaurants, and galleries. Note the beard similarities, too. You might recognize it from Mordecai Richler’s novels, even though though the rents are high and trendy boutiques outnumber the bagel shops.

The Plateau A quick ankle north from McGill, the Plateau is the fastest way to escape school – sometimes it seems that’s what every other student is thinking, too. More bars, boutiques, restaurants, and cafés than you can count. Pick up a roast chicken and go sit in one of the many parks. If you want something more wild, St. Laurent is prime partying turf, especially if you want to ditch downtown.

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The Ghetto You’ll be spending a lot of time here whether you want to or not.

And it’s not half bad, either. You can’t complain about getting from bed to class in five minutes flat, and the houses are lookers to boot. It’s easy to forget that not every Tom, Dick, and Sally here is a student, but everyone gets along pretty well. Things can get tense after a weekend of noisy partying, though.

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Chinatown More than just a couple noodle joints, Chinatown is the place to go for good, cheap groceries, delicious eats, and bargain rags. Small and kinda cutesy if you’re used to the big versions in places like Toronto or New York, but still the real thing.

Latin Quarter Sort of like Crescent, but more French and less shiny. St. Denis hosts some of the best terraces in the city. The shisha bars are always atmospheric, and the lights in the trees make it look like Christmas all year ‘round.

The (Gay) Village A swell time whatever way you swing. When the weather’s warm, Big Catherine is closed to cars and the gay bars spill into the street.

Grab a pint at one of the many relaxed gay bars, or bring your dancing shoes and stay out ‘til dawn. Or both.

Hochelaga-Maisonneuve (HoMa) Very easygoing, very French. The huge Value Village at Ontario and Pie IX is the area’s biggest draw, but the Botanical Gardens and Olympic Stadium are worth checking out too.

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T

Boilers & Zoomcycles

wo wheels are the best way to get around, and The Daily has the low down on where to go for the best biking. Montreal’s lucky enough to have a huge number of bike paths, but there’s more to biking in this town than just following some lines. The side streets of the Plateau and Mile End are usually hush hush enough not to worry about oncoming cars, but if you’re crackers enough to keep riding when the mercury dips, you’ll need to get used to riding on the big streets where snow plows go -- like Sherbrooke and Parc.

Sometimes you need to get off the road, so check out the Lachine Canal in St. Henri, right around the corner from McGill outpost Solin Hall. If you’ve got money on yourself, head further southwest to the Grand Prix Racetrack on Nuns’ Island to train, or opt for more pastoral pleasures in Parc Jean-Drapeau on Île Ste-Hélène in the middle of the St. Lawrence.

Velo Villeneuve | 75 Villeneuve E. Might cost you some dosh, but a good place to upgrade.

Get something custom made without doing all the legwork yourself. Nice looking little set up, too.

Where to buy a ride:

Belleville Cycle Co-op | 1000 St Antoine O. Bare bones and no-nonsense. Tip a few back with the staff and the messenger regulars as you get help fixing your bike.

craigslist | montreal.en.craigslist.ca/bik Head to the home of people selling everything from stolen frames to barely used carbon fibre racing bikes for the best selection and prices. But be careful what you ask for; there’s no guarantee what you’ll get when you show up. Bring a friend who knows about bikes, and be prepared to haggle so you don’t get fleeced.

Velomakak | 215 Murray This joint is packed with bikes of all sorts, so there’s probably something for everyone. If not, they’ll make one just for you. The bikes are sometimes hot, though, and the work can be shall-we-say, creative, so get a mechanic or a friend you really trust to check it out before you take off.

It never hurts to check out whatever bike shop is close at hand for used bikes, or to keep an eye peeled for “For Sale” signs on bikes on street corners around McGill and Concordia during the warmer months, although prices can get a little steep for what you’re getting.

Where to get it fixed up: The Flat | Shatner basement In the basement of the SSMU building, right next to Gerts.

Run by students, for students, these cool guys and gals will help you doll up your ride, or just change a tire.

J.R. Cyclery | 151 Rachel E. Straight forward bike shop for when you just need to drop off your ride and have it tuned up while you’re on a hot case.

Bike Curious | 1757 Amherst In the heart of the village, this joint both fixes and builds up bikes. Some quality new parts, plus you can get a short back and sides while you wait for your iron to get done up.

Cycle Technique | 788 Atwater Good for Solinites. Mostly sells expensive road bikes for the Westmount set, but fine and not too pricey for getting a quick tune up.

Hideouts Renting So kid, you’re sick of the cheap motels and long nights on the road? Looking to shack up somewhere regular for a while till the heat dies down? Most university students will sign their first lease while in school, and Montreal is a great place to do it. Housing is relatively easy on the ole’ purse-strings, and there are a whole host of student-friendly residential neighbourhoods within a half-hour mosey from campus.

Around St. Henri and NDG, several housing co-ops offer an alternative, sustainable mode of living. Wherever you end up though, make sure you know a little bit about getting your own place before signing that dotted line.

Tenant’s rights and obligations McGill students haven’t acquired the best reputation as renters in Montreal. Because of the general image we have as drunk, house-trashing hooligans, landlords often act with extreme caution when renting to students, even to the point of taking advantage of the average student’s inexperience as a tenant and ignorance of Quebec law. Common landlord faux-pas include demanding post-dated cheques, showing up at your house without giving the necessary 24 hour notice, or sending prospective future tenants to the place without coming along. By law, you don’t have to let them in if your landlord isn’t present. Check out rdl.gouv.qc.ca/en/accueil/ accueil.asp for a comprehensive guide to the Quebec laws surrounding tenants and landlords, or drop by the McGill Legal Clinic on the first floor of Shatner for advice.

Furnishing the place If you’re willing to look around, you can get some great, cheap furniture in Montreal. Value Village and the Salvation Army store both have furniture sections, although Value Village’s furniture is not that much better priced than your average antique store. Both places deliver, and are open to haggling. Craigslist is always chock-full of tables, chairs, and couches, sometimes even for free. And because nearly everyone in Montreal moves May, July or September 1, on April 30, June 30 and August 31 the streets are a goldmine of furniture being left for the garbage man. Be careful, though – make sure that what you want to take is actually being thrown out, not just waiting for the moving truck, and avoid upholstered furniture and mattresses – bed bugs are a big problem here.

Random tips and hints • When checking out a place, really check it out, don’t just look around. How’s the water pressure?

Do all the outside doors have proper locks? If the previous tenants are there, ask them some questions and try and gauge their experience with the landlord.

Be careful though – they may be in some conditional arrangement with the landlord to get out of their lease, giving them a vested interest in you taking the place.

• Moving into a friend’s old place with a lease transfer is a great way to avoid big rent increases. There are legendary apartments around town that have been passed down through generations of friends, meaning the current tenants are paying 90s rent prices.

• Make sure you record all the problems with your place when you move in, and get your landlord to recognize them. It’s not uncommon for landlords to try and make you pay for small repairs when you move out – holes in the walls, repainting – that were there long before you were.

• If you’re dealing with a landlord who owns a lot of properties, google their name. You want to know as much as possible about who you’re dealing with.

The-leak.org is a free online service which allows Montreal tenants to share information about landlords and specific apartments. Sign up – it’s a real gold mine.

• Make sure you seal your windows with sealing tape during the winter. You’ll stay warm, and you’ll save a bunch on heating costs. Not to mention, it’s the sustainable thing to do.

• Unless your landlord includes hydro in your rent, it’s your responsibility to set up a new account with Hydro-Québec. This can be done online, and costs $50. Daylight robbery, but what’re ya gonna do? Educate yourself at hydroquebec.com.

Can’t/shan’t buy a bike?

Bixi Don’t knock it so fast. They may not be the sleekest, but they’re practical. If you go there and back it’s cheaper than a pair of metro tickets. Don’t dawdle, though – if you keep the bike for more than half an hour at a time your credit card will get dinged with fees.

STM The metro isn’t half bad, although if you need to lam off in the late night you’re outta luck; it closes around 12:30 a.m. weekdays and 1:30 a.m. on Friday and Saturday. The buses are pretty good too, and there are at least some that run through the night in case you spent all your spinach at the clip joint and can’t shell out for a hack. The 365 runs up and down Parc all night, and the 360 does the same for Pine.

Buying tickets is pricey at $2.75 each way, but if you line up and get your student Opus Card you can get unlimited rides for just $38.75 a month. Just bring a proof of enrolment letter to the McGill station during weekdays (11:30 to 6:00) or weekends (10:30 to 5:00) to register and get your photo taken.

Taxis Some nights the snow’s too cold and the drinks too many to get home the affordable way. Luckily you can hail a cab on almost any major street or call one at (514) 273-2435.

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Public Places in Montreal Square St. Louis Once you’ve tipped a few at the gin mills and java joints on Prince-Artie and your dogs are barking, or you’re lookin’ to cop a quickie on the sly, it’s always a good call to head over to St. Lou. As my mother used to say, “There ain’t no place to talk hooey like Square St. Louis.”

Abandoned warehouse If you gotta make a rendez-vous without lettin’ your neighbours in on the details, St. Ferdinand and De Richelieu is your best bet. Don’t wear your best Italian loafers though, because the place is covered in broken Moxie bottles and old scraps of metal.

Parc Lafontaine When it comes to serious outdoor R&R, Parc Lafontaine is the place to be. You’ve got gorgeous guys and gals on their rollerskates, a pond the size of a freight train, and dogs up the wazoo.

Mile End Sculpture Garden If ya find yourself driftin’ around Mile End and you’re lookin’ to do some trainspotting, head up the Main to Van Horne, hop onto the train tracks there and walk east. It’s a great place to take a stroll and shoot the

shit, and if ya look hard you’ll find the post-industrial creations of local art-man Glen LeMesurier.

Mount Royal You’re guaranteed to find love at Beaver Lake, what with all the daisies and buttaflies and such, and it’s always nice to light up a stogie while you take in the view of central city from the Mount Royal lookout. And if you’re lookin’ to repent for the last gee you bopped or for bumpin’ uglies with your hubby’s pal, St. Joe’s Oratory is unrivalled. And the boneyard is right next door when it comes time to visit the food-for-worms in your household and lay a couple roses on their headstones.

Jean-Talon Market If you’re anything like me, getting’ good grub down your gizzard is priority numero uno, and at JT you can find the stuff without havin’ to take your oyster fruits to the hock shop on the way.

Lachine Canal Now, we all have those embarrassing moments when you’re polishin’ your bean-shooter and you accidentally pop one in your auntie’s face. There’s one place and one place only to dump the stiff, and that place is the Lachine Canal. Aside from that, though, it’s a good spot for when you’re all jingle brained and in need of a good stroll.

The Bus Graveyard The STM dumps its old buses north of the Mile End train tracks on Casgrain. Graff guys paint the ol’ rustos inside and out and it’s a prime locale for a covert liaison, but don’t cause a ruckus or ya might take a little heat from the fuzz.

French at McGill French at McGill New to town? Need to make a quick getaway?

Maybe you just need to tip a few. On this island, you’ll need to understand Gallic, see.

Everybody from the elbow men to the dicks speaks French, so if you wanna lam off without the law catching wise or just jaw with some jaywalkers, you're gonna have to learn some.

FRSL If you wanna bump guns in la belle province, you gotta speak the tongue, so stop in at the English and French language centre (688 Sherbrooke O.) stat to take a placement exam for French as a second language (FRSL) courses. Alternatively, you could go to your local community centre, YMCA, or the Ministère de l’Immigration et des communautés culturelles’ web site to look for francisation programs.

And to get locked up with French for a good long time (the best way to learn it), you should check out J’explore ( jexplore.ca), a program for Canadians that involves being billeted in a francophone city to sharpen your French.

French-language media Already done a box job on French? Hoping to jack the Gallic gems from the linguistic lockbox? Start following French-language media on campus. There’s Le Délit, our sister publication; it appears every Tuesday. CKUT also has several French-language programs throughout the week. You can find their schedule on ckut. ca and tune into 90.3 FM. And don’t forget La Presse, Le Devoir, Rue Frontenac, RadioCanada, et cetera…

French academics Tu gardes ta langue dans ta poche, mais pas ton flingue? Tu as la gâchette facile et de la facilité à parler le français? If you already speak French, you can study in it at the Département de langue et littérature françaises, where most classes are strictly French-only. Lit crit not your bit? Have a look-see at Université de Montréal and Université du Québec à Montréal. You can take classes there and transfer the credits to McGill.

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People in Power W

elcome to McGill: the school with enough brain power to light up the Bell Centre scoreboard into the next century. Just blocks away from the hustlers and cheats down on Ste. Cats, the cinder blocks of tradition are held together by the gummy bodies of administration. In this kinda concrete jungle they can wrap you up in red tape and hang you out to dry before the end of Add-Drop. It’s a nicely treelined haven but it can get dark and lonesome once the leaves hit the ground, so you may as well sit a while and learn about the people that run this joint. Don’t forget: in the Big House you play by House rules, but if you know who the dealers are, you have a fighting chance.

SSMU: YOUR STUDENTS’ SOCIETY President – Zach “THE BIG APPLE” Newburgh Zach Newburgh’s a New Yawker, so he don’t take no beef from nobody, see? In the rocky marriage between students and admin, he’s the marriage counsellor. This slick is here to grease the admin’s wheels and get ‘em movin’ where the kids want. Who pays him?

You do. He sits on Legislative Council, which meets every two weeks and is open to every student. There are also semi-annual General Assemblies where students can table their own policy. He took last April’s election by the skin of his teeth, and every mom and pop with a problem is gonna be lookin’ to take a bite outta the Big Apple.

VP External – Myriam “TOP GUN” Zaidi Zaidi lobbies the big guns at the municipal, provincial, and federal level for your interests. Her key portfolio is makin' sure your pockets are filled with more than lint. She works to keep tuition low so everyone can strut through the Milton Gates and learn something. She’s got so much experience with Quebec politics and student activism, she can spell Conférence des recteurs et des principaux des universités du Québec backwards. Talk to her if you want to see change in your neighbourhood. Who knows, if you fall in love with this city, you might actually want to live here.

VP Internal – Tom “THE TRUMPET” Fabian a.k.a.

T-FAB. You already know T-Fab. He’s the cat who’s been spammin’ your inbox with those emails every week plugging Gert’s Bar or otherwise pushing on-campus career opportunities and volunteer work. Let’s just say he’s trying to put you on the map, so that postage is actually worth a read every once in a while.

And don’t forget to thank him for frosh, ya hear?

VP Clubs and Services – Anushay “BIG DADDY” Khan Got a club to form, a service to provide, a rag to publish? Khan is your friend, pal. She runs Shatner, that hulking grey student centre smokin’ up McTavish (home to Franx, $4 breakfast and coffee). Book private rooms,

like the gorgeous Ballroom or equally stunning Lev Bukhman, through this broad or you’ll be cleanin’ up a house party faster than you can say “keep the noise down.”

VP University Affairs – Joshua “THE CIPHER” Abaki Abaki hits up all bodies of government at McGill to keep SSMU running smoothly.

He’s jawin’ with Senate, Council, Deans and Directors of Faculties and Schools, and a slew of administrative committees that come with the territory. He's gunnin' extended library hours and improved advising.

VP Finance and Operations – Nicholas “THE WALLET” Drew Money is power, and Nicky Drew writes the cheques. Drew told us he wants to renovate Gert's and generally handles dough. He hails from the Desautels Management School, so you can be sure this money man knows more than the difference between revenues and expenses.

MCGILL SENATE Senate includes the top echelons of government, as well as faculty deans, elected members of faculty, and student senators representing each of the faculties. Continuing education, Macdonald College and postgraduate students have reps as well (from MACES, MCSS, and PGSS respectively).

President Newburgh and VP Abaki complete the smokin’ gun club.

“THE FAMILY” – the older dogs that run around James Administration Building.

Chancellor – “DON” Arnold Steinberg Steinberg’s around, but damned if I’ve ever seen him. He took off for the corporate world once he earned degrees from McGill and Harvard in the ’50s and he’s sat on board meetings for Bell, Teleglobe, Provigo, the Banque nationale du Canada, and his family company, Steinberg Inc. Consider him philanthrocapitalism in the flesh.

Chair of the Board – Stuart “BEEF STEW” Cobbett Cobbett chairs the Board of Governors – a 25-person governing body that meets roughly six times a year. It’s McGill’s highest governing body and also the most opaque: the SSMU and PGSS presidents are the only two students who know the secret password. Last October, students pasted Bills 38 and

44, which would have increased external (private) representation on the board. The bills are down, but you can bet your bacon they ‘aint out. These demon dogs could rear their ugly heads when provincial parliament reconvenes this month.

Principal – Heather “DOLL FACE” Munroe-Blum HMB digs funding and research but doesn’t seem too hot on bicycles. I myself have never seen how she gets around campus.

She wants tuition to meet the Canadian average and holds semi-annual town hall meetings to talk about policy on lucrative research. Look for her sporadic short stories in your email on McGill’s economic status.

Provost – Anthony “THE MAESTRO” Masi Masi’s back for more, having been reappointed, and is sticking around until 2015. He holds a degree in sociology and he’s currently burdened with the great problem none of us understand: eliminating McGill’s deficit. Look out for his opus project, the Administrative Task Force on Dealing with Economic Uncertainty. He wants to spend less at home and bring in the biscuits from the outside.

Sounds like a sustainable model, don’t it?

Deputy provost (Student Life and Learning) – Morton “THE MOUTHPIECE” Mendelson I’ve never met the goose, but the rumble is he likes to be called “Morty.” He used to be a student, and I assume he learned something, so student life and learning looks like a breeze for him. He studied Psychology in the 70s so he probably knows what he’s talking about. I ain't seen no ink blots on the snow, but I’m assuming he canvases student opinion in some form or other.

Student Groups

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AMUSE – Association of McGill Undergraduate Student Employees A student union representing student campus employees.

AGSEM – Association of Graduate Students Employed at McGill Your TA union. They went on strike during finals in 2008.

AUS – Arts Undergraduate Society Represents all Arts undergrads on SSMU council and to the administration. Publishing a couple of happening arts and lit rags like Leacocks and Steps, they also run a snappy little lounge in the basement of the Leacock Building.

Thursdays from 5 to 9p.m. it’s a speakeasy serving beers for one berry a pop.

Black Students Association They keep an eagle eye on the interests of black people on campus and in Montreal.

CKUT An independent, community-based radio station broadcasting at 90.3 FM. From muck-raking reporters to swinging tunes, this station’s got it all. Tune your dials and lend an ear.

Choose Life Caused a right stir the past two years with protests that made a lotta plugs hot under the collar. The pro-life group is still ticking as an official SSMU club after a suspension of their club status last year.

Conservative McGill The campus wing of the political party that constitutes Canada’s current minority government, these guys and dolls bring in hot-shot politicos and right-wing stars like Immigration Minister Jason Kenney, and pundit Tasha Kheiriddin.

Demilitarize McGill Crusaders for transparency and giving the old ethical looksee to military research done at McGill.

EdUS – Education Undergraduate Society Keeping all them teachers-to-be in line up the hill in the Education building.

EUS – Engineering Undergraduate Society Represents all Engineering undergrads on SSMU council and to the administration. These ginks and girlies also run the boppin’ Open Air Pub the week before classes start.

French Student Community This is home-base for francophone students on campus – 20 per cent of the grand total. Affiliated with SSMU. Global AIDS Coalition Their gig: pasting HIV/AIDS for good, by conducting advocacy campaigns on campus and around town.

Habitat for Humanity Not-for-profit organization trying to get a roof over the heads of Jims and Janes without much cabbage in Montreal.

Hillel McGill McGill branch of a North America-wide Jewish student organization that made a splash last year by lobbying against a motion to divest SSMU money from companies doin’ deals in the West Bank Journalists for Human Rights McGill Campus chapter of a global organization with a self-explanatory mission. They print a magazine featuring reporting by McGill students on pressing global issues. Look out for it on campus stands.

Liberal Party at McGill The campus arm of the party of Canada’s current Official Opposition, these cats and broads announce their mission this way: “student engagement in Liberal politics, one stride at a time.”

Muslim Students Association A hub for Muslim students on campus, they support “activities brought in accordance with Quran and Sunnah,” Muslim holy texts.

MUNACA – McGill University Non-Academic Certified Association You know what this union does? Represent working folk on campus.

MUS – Management Undergraduate Society The facts and figures line up for these guys and dolls who keep their books balanced and froshes’ bumping.

SPHR – Solidarity for Palestinian Human Rights This hip gang takes firm stands on the Israel-Palestine conflict (guess which side) and is involved in the annual Israeli Apartheid Week. Say hey to these cats if the Middle East is what turns your crank.

NDP McGill Campus branch of the left-wing national party. Former members include Adam Giambrone, Toronto City Councillor and commissioner of Toronto’s public transit system.

SSMU – Student Society of McGill University The student government of all undergrads at McGill. Housed in the Shatner building at 3480 McTavish, they hold a bi-weekly council meeting and twice annual General Assembly. The General Assembly is a real scream, and worth a visit. This mammoth organization is HQ for student life on campus.

Outdoors Club They organize canoe trips, hikes and camping trips for the jaspers among us.

SUS – Science Undergraduate Society The beakers are bubblin’ and the flasks are filling as the SUS checks up on all the scientists at this joint.

PGSS—Post-Grad Student Society The student government of McGill post-grads. Conducts monthly council meetings and lobbies hard at both the provincial and federal level for student issues.

Tadamon!

A Montreal collective that considers Israel an apartheid state and calls for an injunction against Israeli companies as well as sanctions against the country.

QPIRG A radical, mostly student-run activist group that aims for social justice.

UGE – Union for Gender Empowerment Whether you’re a bird or a palooka, or neither, or both, UGE advocates for your safety and well-being, while running an extensive lending library and printing gender-neutral IDs.

Queer McGill Promotes the political and social well-being of queer people at McGill. Their office is a safe space to discuss queer issues.

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Student Services CaPS (Career and Planning Services) | Brown Building, Suite 4100 For any scholarly bo on the nut in school looking to make some heavy cabbage, the dukes and dames at Career Planning Services will show you the dough faster than bank teller with a bean-shooter in his button. After a face-to-face with these folks, it’ll be duck soup to settle your gin mill tab.

Counselling Service | Brown Building, Suite 4200 When I find myself behind the eight-ball in school and such, bumping gums with the pros at the Counselling Service has been a great way to rest my getaway sticks. Even if you’re one of those clammed-up types, give it a few trips and it’ll be as if you’ve been drinking out the same bottle as this gee for years.

Whether your troubles are academic, person-

al, or emotional, these hombres won’t put the screws on. In fact, they’ll have you hitting on all eight in no time.

First Peoples’ House | 3505 Peel Street They say it best: "Like most ‘Houses’ across Canada, the First Peoples' House attempts to provide a sense of community and a voice to aboriginal students that have left their home communities in order to pursue their education."

First Year Office | Brown Building, Suite 2100 I was green once, we all are, I suppose. That’s why there’s a First Year Office, for all those McGill rooks in dutch. If you want the rumble on where things are, where things aren’t, who to talk to, and who not to talk to, the First Year Office is here so we aren’t all running around like smoked froshies all year.

International Student Services | Brown Building, Suite 3215 He said he wasn’t from 'round here. At least I think that’s what he said. It was hard to hear exactly, through his accent and all. Anyway, I told him to gun for International Student Services – they’ll take all the work off your flippers. “Sometimes this place can give you the Broderick…” I told him, and if you’re new in town, trust me, you need all the help you can get.

Scholarships and Student Aid Office | Brown Building, Suite 3200 My pop always told me university has a nasty habit of eating all your spinach in a hurry. You might have to jump through some hoops to get there, but the Scholarships and Student Aid Office can cook up some spondulix that will fatten your wallet more than a Christmas cheque from grandma. If you’re a real wisehead these ginks and girlies can even set you up with some of that fresh Ottawa dough.

Tutorial Service | Brown Building, Suite 4200 I’ve been a loner my whole life, and that’s how I like it. Apparently, though, some people are willing to accept a helping hand if certain classes have them jingle-brained. These high pillows at the Tutorial Service pull all the strings in those kinds of study circles. Whether you want to jaw with others in the same bind as you or with a tutor who’s been there before and made it out alive to tell the tale, the Tutorial Service will have the answers for all your problems (just not all your questions).

Health Service & Dental Clinic | Brown Building, Suite 3300 This nifty walk-in clinic on the corner of Peel and Dr. Penfield will do more than just test your patience. If you feel a few yawns away from the big sleep, these croakers can find out why, and fix you up with the dope to get you back on your feet. Be prepared to grab a number when you get there though, when you get this far north, everyone’s got a cold.

Mental Health Service | Brown Building, Suite 5500 I’m no chemist, but I do know the combination of reefer, stiff eel juice, and heavy nights in the library can have you seeing things. After all, seeing a head doctor doesn’t mean you’re goofy, ‘round the twist, or anything like that.

It just means you go to McGill.

Students with Disabilities | Brown Building, Suite 3100 Running into barriers? Let the Office for Students with Disabilities give you a hand. As they say, “The role of the OSD is to provide academic accommodations and services for McGill undergraduate, graduate, and postdoctoral students who have a documented disability.”

The Shag Shop | Brown Building, Suite 3300 In my line of work, you’re gonna have the occasional scare. Suffice it to say, the Shag Shop and I go back farther than any P.I. would care to admit. Stop in to pick up what you need to protect what matter most – you know what I mean – and keep happy south of your belt buckle.

Religion After a wild night, a man’s gotta balance his books. With the Big Guy or Gal upstairs, that is. Whether you already make chin music with the Head Honcho, or you’re looking for an introduction to the Man with the Plan, McGill can set up the meeting. If you need to go from playin’ to prayin’, get yourself acquainted with McGill’s faith services.

Chaplaincy Services | 3600 McTavish, Suite 4400 These guys have you covered from A to Z. They’ve got an ace team of Buddhist, Sikh, Jewish, Christian, and Muslim counsellors to set you on the right path. Chaplaincy Services

have scheduled a “Faith in Film” contest open to students with a grand prize of 500 clams. Stay tuned.

Impact Church | YWCA, 1355 Rene-Levesque O. These fishers of men are the brains behind Fish Frosh, and shepherd young Christians of all denominations. Services every Sunday at 4 p.m.

The Newman Centre | 3484 Peel The Newman Centre operates McGill’s Catholic Studies program and hosts social justice oriented activities. Mass is held every Sunday at 5 p.m., Saturday at 6 p.m. and on weekdays (except Monday) at 4 p.m. If you need to get somethin’ off your chest, the Sacrament of Reconciliation is held one hour before mass, and these padres’ll have you pipin’ the light like the Fourth o’ July.

Chabad Student Centre | 3429 Peel Hillel McGill | 3460 Stanley Ghetto Shul | 3458 Parc Some rube named Michael Chabon invented the genre of Jewish noir with a book called The Yiddish Policeman’s Union. Word on the street is it’s worth a read.

These groups provide Shabbat dinner and all holiday services. Ghetto Shul is a self-described student run synagogue for the grass roots.

Muslim Students | SSMU Basement, Room B09 After a nasty dust-up with the administration, McGill’s Muslim Student’s Association has secured a prayer space in the Shatner building. They also host Friday prayer in the Ballroom on Shatner’s third floor.

Birks Chapel | William and Henry Birks Building, 3520 University If you wanna hit the books or the Bible, the Birks building has been reconcilin’ science and religion for years. A doozy of a chapel holds services every Tuesday at noon.

Zen Meditation | 3600 McTavish If your noodle’s feelin’ cooked, you can sing your sorrows to yourself until you get a proper slant on life. Starting September 24, Chaplaincy Services will be holding meditation on Wednesdays at 1:00 p.m.

Sports

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

11

Making the news On how the mainstream sports media dictates public opinion

Nicole Stradiotto for The McGill Daily

hegemonic power over the public opinion of sports fans than ever before. Do people really care if Brett Favre reports to training camp, or if LeBron James switches teams?

ESPN can turn a relatively insignificant story into one that gets covered

like the BP oil spill by choosing to make it important. With a society of voracious sports consumers and such globally recognized and prominent media outlets, 24-hour sports media are creating the narratives for their networks and the sports world.

Write for Sports !

n the mov ,o e ol

rvices

than try to beat the best players in the league. It was like ESPN had performed Inception on my brain. Ultimately, the situation boiled down to a star athlete who was unsatisfied with his current team and had the ability to pick any team he wanted, and chose to play with good teammates that would help him win a championship (in Miami instead of Cleveland, no less). On his blog, comedian Michael Showalter satirically commented about the outrage over James: “If given the choice between working with the best people or mediocre people I will always choose to work with mediocre people because then I will be way less successful at doing the thing I love the most and have worked my whole life to succeed at! It’s such a nobrainer!”

There’s no rule book for professional athletes that says you have to win on your own. Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, and Larry Bird all had Hall of Famer teammates on their side. The outrage over James’s supposed lack of competitiveness is an artificial belief that became popular opinion partly because of the talking heads that said so.

As local newspapers and their sports sections go under, the major sports media networks have more

se

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or one week in July, NBA star LeBron James’s free agency dominated the airwaves, hijacking attention away from the World Cup, the world’s biggest international sporting event. In the weeks before the self-aggrandizing, hour-long selection show to pick a new team broadcast across North America to announce James’s decision, I was already sick of hearing about it. I even rooted for James’s Cleveland Cavaliers over my hometown Boston Celtics in the playoffs just from a desire to put an end to the endless discussion about his pursuit of an NBA title and ensuing free agency. And yet when the announcement came, I was engrossed. I actually booed my television when he said he was “taking [his] talents down to South Beach.” From flippant and dismissive, I was suddenly acting as if deeply invested in what happened; it just goes to show the power of sports media. Suddenly, James’s decision was important and a big deal just because ESPN made it important and a big deal.

The sports media have the power to instantly change the public’s perception of profession-

al sports. LeBron James and NFL player Brett Favre, not so long ago, were the darlings of their respective leagues until recently. Now they are targets of scorn for fans and the media. If not for the intrusive coverage of professional athletes’ personal lives, Tiger Woods would still be known as the world’s most famous golfer who happened to get in a car accident last November, rather than the world’s most infamous philanderer. ESPN created the buzz necessary to get people to tune into The Decision, James’s hour-long team selection show, by spending the days before with non-stop coverage and even a page on their website called “LeBron Tracker.”

The event attracted more viewers than this year’s Stanley Cup finals.

James is now a villain amongst NBA fans because the network he sold the one-hour special to would later demonize him for having the show.

In the aftermath of the LeBron Decision, the same opinion was repeated across all sports news outlets: “Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, and Larry Bird never would have done that.” I then found myself criticizing him not only for being egotistic enough to announce his free agency decision the way he did, but also because he chose to join the best players in the league rather

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The McGill Daily

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Health&Education

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

12

The hidden addiction McGill gambling treatment centre researches the risks of online gaming Naomi Endicott The McGill Daily

I

n a society that thrives on risk, it has become increasingly socially acceptable to live life to excess. “Binge drinking culture” has become a media catchphrase, and the world watches, enthralled, as each week a new celebrity enters – or re-enters – rehab. Gambling is swiftly entering everyday life in the form of televised poker tournaments and online casinos offering everything from roulette to blackjack to bingo.

McGill’s International Centre for Youth Gambling Problems and High-Risk Behaviors is leading research into the causes and treatments of gambling problems in young people. Jeffrey Derevensky, Professor of School and Applied Child Psychology in McGill’s Department of Educational and Counseling Psychology, outlined the centre’s aims: to “understand why some people can gamble normally without running into any problems and why some individuals develop problems.” Propensity towards developing a problem is linked to genetics, gender (males gamble more than females), and an addictive personality. However, Derevensky also pointed out that “one of the scariest findings that we found recently when we looked at college students with respect to why they gamble on the internet – is because of boredom.”

The centre aims their research toward developing preventive treatments by identifying at-risk groups of people. Derevensky emphasized the pluralistic attitude the centre

takes towards developing treatments: “We work on trying to understand what the underlying problems are – so we take a more eclectic approach.” Individuals with gambling problems “are not necessarily a homogenous group, but rather they have different attitudes [and] perspectives.” DVDs, CD-ROMs, printouts, therapy, and video games are used to raise awareness about and treat gambling problems.

Online casinos take advantage of students’ obsession with video games, leading to their massive rise in popularity. Many online games are free and endless. If you lose, you start over without consequence. This way of thinking transfers to online casinos, and it’s easy to develop the attitude that if you’re losing, you just need to keep practicing to win. Certain online casinos capitalize on this attitude by establishing sister sites that let new members practice before actually playing for money.

But Derevensky points out that research suggests the payout rates on these free practice sites differs from the play-for-money sites.

“There’s a natural inclination to think ‘If I’d only been doing this for real money, look how much I’d have.’”

Although in Derevensky’s experience, gambling problems among McGill students aren’t a widespread concern, the centre’s research has revealed a number of ways in which students are more susceptible to developing addictions. Eighteen to 25 year olds – that age bracket that bears the burden of majority in so many research studies – are more at risk. This, said Derevensky, combined with the general attitude of

Jerry Gu | The McGill Daily

college students that “they’re smarter than everyone else – more invulnerable and invincible – becomes the perfect [setting] for engaging in gambling excessively.”

Excessive gambling is now easier than ever. With provincial governments operating real-life casinos (Loto-Québec runs three) and lotteries, not only is it socially acceptable to gamble but it’s officially endorsed as well. Derevensky explained that Quebec is involved in developing internet poker sites, and that it “will eventually open up full-scale [online] casino gambling, possibly even sports gambling.”

Provincial governments do allocate funds towards treatment for at-risk and problem gamblers, but this spending is out of proportion with the gains. Quebec’s net profit from gambling was just under $1.5 billion in 2003-2004, but they spent only 1.37 per cent of their $20-million budget on the 4.6 per cent of the population that is at risk from excessive gambling. (Although when calculated to the amount per individual at-risk and problem gambler, Quebec gives more than any other province.)

The reality of gambling today is a far cry from the dazzling glamour

of Ocean’s Eleven and the Bond franchise. With the advent of online casinos, gambling has become known as the “hidden addiction.”

With no defined physical effects on the body, diagnosis can be tricky.

As McGill’s International Centre for Youth Gambling Problems and High-Risk Behaviors is making strides in research around the world, it should not be forgotten as a key resource for the University’s own students.

For more information on resources available to students, see youthgambling.com

WRITE ABOUT SEX AND ROBOTS. Health&Ed and Sci+Tech meetings Thursdays at 5:30 in Shatner B-24 healthandeducation@mcgilldaily.com scitech@mcgilldaily.com

Health&Education

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

13

Grad student seeking sex-ed The pleasures and potential pains of romance

September 7-13, www.minicourses.ca Activities Nights, September 14-15, 4pm-7pm, Shatner University Centre September 16-17, 4pm-7pm, Room B29, Shatner University Centre

REGISTRATION INFORMATION

* Times, dates, rooms, instructors, and prices are subject to change until registration week

Thursdays Mondays Tuesdays PILATES YOGA ZUMBA

Fitness & Health

NEW ONLINE REGISTRATION IN-PERSON LATE REGISRATION I IN-PERSON LATE REGISRATION II

2 4, 11, 18, 25, 30 1, 8, 15, 22, 29 2, 9, 16, 23 14, 21 4, 18, 25 5, 12, 19, 26 Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom 4:00-5:00pm 8:00-9:00pm 4:00-5:00pm

7:00-8:30pm 4:00-5:30pm 5:30-7:00pm 4:00-5:30pm 5:30-7:00pm 5:30-7:00pm 7:00-8:30pm 4:00-5:30pm 4:00-5:30pm 4:00-5:30pm 5:30-7:00pm 7:00-8:30pm 7:00-8:30pm 5:30-7:00pm Tuesdays Mondays Mondays Wednesdays Wednesdays Thursdays Thursdays Thursdays Mondays Wednesdays Wednesdays Mondays Mondays Mondays ARABIC BEGINNER FRENCH BEGINNER I FRENCH BEGINNER II FRENCH INTERMEDIATE I FRENCH INTERMEDIATE II FRENCH CONVERSATION I FRENCH CONVERSATION II GERMAN BEGINNER ITALIAN BEGINNER KOREAN BEGINNER JAPANESE BEGINNER MANDARIN BEGINNER SIGN LANGUAGE SPANISH BEGINNER

Languages

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October

November

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One thing’s not complicated: the need to get tested and to stay informed. To learn more visit www.cdc.gov/std or www.headandhands.ca and to protect yourself, stop by the Shag Shop in the Brown Building. Happy and safe nibbling to all! Gabriel Sandino is the pseudonym of a McGill graduate student.

September

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diploma, appreciate that McGill now has one of those damn machines, and pee in your cup in peace (either way, get tested).

I still cross my legs and wince whenever I think about it.

The good news is that two weeks later I stopped by to see the doctor and he said dryly that I was indeed “safe,” as if he had forgotten our bonding moment. Now I’m waiting anxiously for the next woman to ask me the question, at which point I will proudly and confidently pronounce my safety. But wait! Depending on how much I trust her, it’s just going to start all over again, isn’t it?

Do my married friends worry about these things?

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December October

Lev Bukhman 9:30am-4:30pm One-day course SPEED READING II

Ballroom One-day course SPEED READING I

9:30am-4:30pm

Two-day course

B29 9:30am-4:30pm

9:30am-1:30pm

One-day course

BUILD A COMPUTER FROM SCRATCH PUBLIC SPEAKING

B29

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Education

6:00-8:00pm 6:00-8:00pm 6:00-9:00pm

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obligated to explain my recent revelation and declare that I had no real reason to think that I actually had one.

“Two of them are going to require a urethral swab,” he said as he looked down. I soon learned that “swab” is not a happy word when spoken between men in a doctor’s office. Much to my disappointment, he seemed as anxious about the whole thing as I did. At that point, he explained that most offices test for gonorrhea and chlamydia with a simple urine sample, but that McGill had not yet purchased the machine.

Oh, don’t get me started, I thought.

Before I knew it, I was lying on my back with my underwear around my knees. My eyes widened at the sight of a triple-length q-tip.

“Is this gonna hurt?” I said, panicking.

“Yes,” he said with determination. And then it happened! I will never again wonder what is the most sacred and sensitive part of my body. Or should I say in my body. My back arched, my eyes watered, and I let out a guttural groan like Chewbacca. For the love of God, study hard, get your

November

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4, 18, 25

Tuesdays Tuesdays One-day course

Midnight Kitchen Midnight Kitchen École des Maitres

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Midnight Kitchen

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3, 10, 17, 24 4, 11, 18, 25 1 1, 8

6:00-9:00pm 6:00-8:00pm 6:00-8:00pm 5:30-7:30pm Two-day course Wednesdays Thursdays Wednesdays

École des Maitres Midnight Kitchen Midnight Kitchen Midnight Kitchen

Eating & Drinking

BARTENDING (Masters) CARIBBEAN COOKING INDIAN COOKING ITALIAN COOKING MIDDLE EASTERN COOKING PERUVIAN COOKING BAKING & DESSERT WINE TASTING (Masters)

Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom Ballroom 5:00-6:30pm 4:00-5:30pm 7:30-9:00pm 7:00-8:00pm 5:30-7:00pm 6:00-7:30pm 8:00-9:00pm 6:30-8:00pm 5:00-6:30pm 4:30-6:00pm 7:30-9:00pm Thursdays Mondays Wednesdays Mondays Mondays Wednesdays Thursdays Thursdays Tuesdays Wednesdays Tuesdays

Dancing

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Not recently, is my guess. The barrage of information and advice we received throughout high school dropped off soon after we graduated.

In university, we were too cool to talk about syphilis and the sort, even though some of us were just starting to put ourselves at risk. The only time I remember it coming up was one day when my best friend needed to put cream on his entire body and wash his sheets to get rid of the “crabs.” We joked for a couple days, but never really asked what he had done to get them. When I returned from out West, there was only one thing to do: visit the McGill Health Clinic and schedule an appointment.

“I need a regular check up,” I said, “and, uh, a full set of STI tests.”

At that point the person at the desk gave me a look that I’m still trying to decipher.

“Remind the doctor when you see him,” she responded. Three weeks later I walked into the office having no idea what to expect.

“So you want STI testing?” the doctor asked, at which point I felt

September

November October September

23 Mont Royal Park 4:00-8:00pm Saturday

4, 11, 18, 25 1, 8, 15, 22, 29 3, 10, 17, 24 1, 8, 15, 22, 29, 30 1, 8, 15, 22, 29 3, 10, 17, 24 4, 11, 18, 25 4, 11, 18, 25 2, 9, 16, 23 3, 10, 17, 24 2, 9, 16, 23

December

December November

2, 9, 16, 23 2, 9, 16, 23 3, 10, 17, 24 2, 9, 16, 23 3, 10, 17, 24 5, 12, 19, 26 5, 12, 19, 26 6, 13, 20, 27 5, 12, 19, 26 6, 13, 20, 27 4:00-5:30pm 6:30-7:30pm 7:00-8:30pm 5:30-7:00pm 7:00-8:30pm

GUITAR BEGINNER I GUITAR BEGINNER II INTRO TO SKETCH KNITTING PAINTING PHOTOGRAPHY WORKSHOP

Tuesdays Tuesdays Wednesdays Tuesdays Wednesdays

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Month & Days Day

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Arts

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arts | dancing | eating & drinking | education | languages | fitness courses

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J

ust recently, at age 35, I went through STI testing and found myself wondering if I’m a late bloomer. Apparently I am. I drank my first beer (four actually) one night over the summer before my last year in high school. I remember losing feeling in my gums and laughing a lot. It wasn’t until sophomore year at university that I smoked weed from a dented Coke can with some more experienced friends from my floor. Again I found myself laughing.

And it wasn’t until the following year, during a semester abroad in Barcelona, that an older Dutch woman in tall black boots asked, “Do you want to?” I really did, but needless to say it was a quick endeavour I found more terrifying than laughable. Finally, at 23, I fell in love for the first time. Most of my friends were on their fourth or fifth relationship with shoe boxes of heart-covered letters under their beds. My girlfriend and I dated for eight years, and despite being the

one who decided to break up, the relationship took me a few years to get over.

So here I am, a 35 year-old graduate student at McGill, dating for what feels like the first time. I recently visited a woman out West, and on the first night she asked the question we have all been trained to ask: “Are you safe?”

“Yeah,” I said as tenderly as possible, “are you?”

And with that quick exchange, voila, we had the green light to touch and lick and nibble to our hearts’ content. With the exception of one critical child-making moment to avoid, we were free, right? The problem hit me when we were lying in bed later that night. The real answer to her question was, “I have no friggin’ idea!”

Am I alone here? Are you really safe? Or do you also have no idea?

It had been at least five years since my last STI tests, and about 20 since sex-ed with a school nurse. When is the last time most single men my age have been tested, or the last time they’ve refreshed their knowledge of STIs?

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Health & Education Writer

BALLROOM BELLY DANCING BOLLYWOOD DANCE BREAKDANCING BURLESQUE HIP HOP BEGINNER HIP HOP INTERMEDIATE LATIN DANCE SALSA BEGINNER I SALSA BEGINNER II SWING DANCE

Gabriel Sandino

Culture

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The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Having your kale and eating it too Community garden invites local restaurants for a cookout cook-off Naomi Endicott The McGill Daily

U

rban agriculture is becoming ever more popular as people realize how easy it actually is. To raise student awareness of the possibilities of gardening in the city, Santropol Roulant – a community-based and volunteer-run organization that uses the power of food as a means of social reform – is holding an “Iron Chef cook-off ” in the Edible Campus garden next to Burnside building. All proceeds will go toward the organization’s activities, including the meals-onwheels program.

Maddie Ritts, a U4 Arts student and intern at Santropol, explained the importance of the meals-onwheels kitchen: “We cook all the meals in our kitchen with volunteers, and then we deliver them on our bicycles to client members all over Montreal. Most of our client member base is people who suffer from a loss of autonomy – so a lot of seniors in the city, people with a disability, people with other health issues who have difficulty getting food get their dinner with us.” By using all the produce from the garden collective for local projects, Santropol Roulant enables McGill students to easily get involved in the wider community; you don’t even have to go off campus to contribute.

But when the project is so removed from the rest of campus life, it can go unnoticed among students. To raise awareness of their project, Santropol is holding an Iron Chef cook-off on September 2. Ritts organized the event with help from volunteers of Santropol and the radio station CKUT. She said this year’s fundraiser is a development of a workshop run last year to promote local healthy eating: “a bunch of folks picked veggies and herbs straight from the garden and then on little camping stoves cooked something up and had one hour to do that. So we thought this would be a really great idea to do on a much bigger scale to raise money for Santropol.”

The six restaurants invited to participate – among them Fuchsia, Crudessence, Lola Rosa, and Serafim – were all chosen because they have “similar ideas and beliefs around food, food security, accessibility.” These teams will have one hour to make a meal for a panel of judges.

Although there is a catch: they are limited to whatever produce they can cull from the garden, in addition to the basics of salt, pepper, olive oil, a knife, a cutting board, and one special ingredient. Their efforts will be judged by a motley crew comprised of McGill students, journalists from Montreal papers, the Hour and the Gazette,

and Santropol members.

With this event, Ritts said, “I guess the idea is just to draw attention to the garden...and [how] it’s really easy to grow a tomato plant in the spring time and not buy tomatoes from Provigo.” Ritts emphasised the importance of transforming “urban landscapes into nourishing, green, accessible spaces where people can grow food and form their diets around the food that they can grow themselves in the city.”

If your landlord isn’t keen on you digging up the back garden to grow competition-worthy pumpkins, students can pick up a volunteer shift in both the Burnside garden (although act fast because gardening season will be soon over) and year-round in the kitchen and on delivery shifts. In the meantime, come along to the garden in front of Burnside Hall for an evening of cheap food from Campus Crops and beer from McAuslan brewery. All proceeds go toward the Edible Campus and meals-on-wheels programs. With performances from Montreal stalwarts Pat Jordache and David Simard, as well as a corn roast, you can’t say no. BYO toothpicks.

September 2, 5p.m.-10p.m. in the garden. From 11p.m. onwards there’s an after-party, attended by the chefs and judges, at Blizzart’s (3956 St .Laurent)

Victor Tangermann | The McGill Daily

The Edible Campus Project brightens up Burnside.

Banquets on the grass Exploring the picnic potential of Montreal’s public spaces Aaron Vansintjan The McGill Daily

M

y friend and I mounted our bicycles one sunny summer morning, bought a baguette ($2.50, Premiere Moisson, 860 Mont-Royal), half a chicken ($7.50, Romados, 115 Rachel E.), an avocado, cherry tomatoes, and three cans of Santa Cruz Ginger Ale ($5.05, Segal’s, 4001 St. Laurent).

We biked down Berri, turned right on René-Lévesque, and charged the imposing JacquesCartier bridge. Once that battle was behind us the lush greenery of Ile St-Helene lay before us, playfully inviting us to uncover its dark secrets.

Pushing forward, we ignored the theme park, the biosphere, and a slick open-air swimming pool, and aimed for the north-eastern part of the island. Here, trees and thick undergrowth cast their cool shadows over a boulder-strewn slope that slides delicately into the churning St. Lawrence river.

Abandoning our bicycles, we descended the slope, and planted ourselves on some comfortable rocks by the water. Having unpacked our picnic, we admired the Montreal skyline from the shadow of an overhanging tree and made sandwiches out of our tempting loot.

Far to our left, an old man was swimming by himself, and some 200 metres to our right there was some kind of speedboat rodeo going on. Lots of people in life-vests were screaming and whooping while the speedboat buckled and threw itself at the waves trying to shake off its passengers. The lemming-like behaviour bothered us, so we turned and watched the old man waddle around the rocks looking for his towel, bending down and delicately revealing his crack.

After eating a bit we did a little extreme sport of our own. Taking off our clothes, we put on our bathing trunks and waded into the water. Slowly at first, you know, taking it easy, then going all the way under. When we were both done,

we dried off, enjoyed the view, and finished the food. Spent but satisfied, we headed back to Montreal Island.

Our city provides a wealth of choices to the would-be picnicker.

In addition to Parc Jean-Drapeau, Parc Jeanne-Mance, and Parc Lafontaine are full of ample green space. If you’re feeling adventurous, picnic in the shadow of abandoned factories by the Lachine Canal. If you’re feeling romantic, climb the mountain, find a nice spot on the northwest side and time your picnic to the setting of the sun.

But why would you eat on the grass when there’s a perfectly good kitchen table waiting at home?

Simply because picnicking is magical. It’s so much more than just sitting on a (sometimes prickly) patch of grass. Picnicking frees you from the worries and problems that you can’t escape in your own house. It’s difficult to explain, but it’s the way it is. If you’ve ever picnicked before, you’ll know what I mean. If you haven’t, well there’s not much time left before the snow sets in.

Picnic hints • Cantaloupe, brie cheese, baguettes, and a cheap rosé. Some prosciuto makes this combo even more delicious .• A fresh pasta salad and chilled home-made iced tea and/or some red wine • Crêpes (tell friends to bring toppings) and iced coffee or cheap Oasis juice • Buy some pastries and bring a thermos of coffee • Everyone brings a sandwich to trade • Heat some tortillas and everyone can bring toppings • Buy a $30 portable grill at Canadian Tire (comes with a bag of charcoal!), tell friends to bring things to grill (peppers, steak, tofu, veggie burgers, mushrooms, mango–anything goes), and bring sangria or beer. Do this a couple of times and you eventually make your money back. You can barbecue in most large Montreal parks without any trouble from the cops, and you can legally drink in most parks as long as you’re eating a meal with it.

Classifieds To place an ad, via email: ads@dailypublications.org • phone: 514-398-6790 • fax: 514-398-8318 in person: 3480 McTavish St., Suite B-26, Montreal QC H3A 1X9 Cost: McGill Students & Staff: $6,70/day; $6.20/day for 3 or more days.

General public: $8.10/day; $6.95/day for 3 or more days.

150 character limit. There will be a $6.00 charge per contract for any characters over the limit. Prices include taxes. MINIMUM ORDER $40.50/ 5 ads. Lost & Found ads are free. Other categories include: Movers/Storage, Employment, Word Processing/Typing, Services Offered, For Sale, To Give Away, Wanted to Buy, Rides/Tickets, Lost & Found, Personal, Lessons/Courses, Notices, Volunteers, Musicians, etc.

Housing 日本人留学生のルームメイトを探しています。物静か、 きれい好きなカナディアン２人 が３人目のシェアメイトを探しています。 アパートはお洒落なプラトー地区のローリエ 駅（メトロオレンジライン）から1分で便利。私たちは日本語を２年勉強していて、 日本 語での会話を練習したいと思っています。英語・フランス語のバイリンガルなので語学 勉強のお手伝いをします。 ３人で楽しく語学交換をしながら生活しませんか。 お部屋は 10月１日から入居可能。家賃は＄495／月 （暖房・電気・インターネット・電話代込み） 詳細はご連絡ください。kodamastore@gmail.com

Downtown, next to McGill University.

Available apartments all included, 1, 2 or 3 bedrooms. Close to groceries, drugstores and subway stations.

Indoor swimming pool available.

For more information please call:

514-499-3455 www.cogir.net Downtown on St-Marc St. 1 ½, 2 ½, 3 ½ renovated, ALL INCLUSIVE! Near Atwater &

1100 Dr. Penfield 3 ½, 4 ½ renovated apartments, all included Indoor pool & 24h doorman Interior & exterior parking available.

Close to everywhere!

Call (514) 286-9191 www.cogir.net

Can’t get enough Daily?

We’re looking for editors.

The McGill Daily currently has openings for Design and Copy editors.

Email a (maximum) one-page candidate statement to coordinating@mcgilldaily.com by midnight on September 14.

Rundowns will be held September 15.

Elections will be held September 16.

(Must be present at both to vote.)

To learn about requirements for the positions, or to get involved now, stop by Shatner B-24 or email coordinating@mcgilldaily.com

Employment MASTER SCHOOL OF BARTENDING Bartending and table service courses Student rebate Job reference service • 514-849-2828 www.Bartend.ca (online registration possible)

More at

www.mcgilldaily.com/classifieds

Guy Metro stations & Concordia & McGill Universities. Interior swimming pool, squash and sauna in the building. Interior & exterior parking available.

514-935-4673 www.cogir.net

Housing classifieds are FREE for McGill students!

Email us with your name, McGill ID number and classified text at addesign@ dailypublications.org and we will add it to our online classifieds page free of charge. mcgilldaily.com/classifieds

Lessons/Courses FREE TANGO LESSONS Sept 3, 10 (Fri.) at 9 PM, Sept 2 (Thurs.) at 5:30 PM, Sept 8 (Wed.) at 8:30PM. info@tangofabrika.com • 514-561-2323 www.tangofabrika.com • 5359 ave du Parc (St-Viateur)

For Sale Canon 40D for sale - 40D body with 3 years left on extended warranty - BG-E2N battery grip - Extra BP-511a battery - EFs high-precision focusing screen - Sandisk Extreme III 2GB memory card - Lowepro Voyager C strap In perfect shape, no dust or scratches. Call 514-6036558 or email cortenbach.s.dawson@gmail.com

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Victor Tangermann

Photo Essay

17

Compendium!

The McGill Daily, Wednesday, September 1, 2010

18

Lies, half-truths, and remorse

Photos by Bikuta Tanaman | The McGill Daily

School starting again

EVEN

The Daily’s starting up again

PLUS 10

MUS gives its frosh a “tribal” theme

MINUS 10

Realizing their mistake, MUS swiftly changes frosh theme and orders new shirts, et cetera, in short order Tuition hikes for international students

PLUS 20 MINUS 50

McGill’s budget is totally neoliberal

MINUS 100

McGill paints McTavish and the road leading to Milton a gaudy green

MINUS 5

Some people actually like the green

MINUS 1

Security guards can bike on campus, but not students New sofas in the Shatner student lounge

MINUS 10 PLUS 5

Catty signs in the Shatner bathroom tell you not to splash water still there

MINUS 5

Still no prayer space for Muslim students (where they could perform ablutions)

MINUS 10

Michael Ignatieff says “It takes four to tango”

MINUS 5

Beautiful weather this week

PLUS 20

TOTAL

MINUS 141

This small cell of McGill Asatruar are praying that Odin will get them laid and/or drunk tonight.

HONEST FROSH A HIT Regrets, beerfarts fill campus Neopagans form prayer circle for booze, “play” Hooligans leave campus a pigsty, says your mother MORNING-AFTER PILL SUPPLIES DANGEROUSLY LOW, SAYS RAMQ Télésphore Sansouci The McGill Daily

T

he new cross-faculty frosh theme of honesty found overwhelming support across a swath of the first-year population.

Especially well-loved were “Unprotected Sex with Multiple Partners Frosh,” run by AUS; “Hooking Up with Someone You Don’t Like because You’re Drunk Frosh,” run by EUS; “Waking Up in a Stranger’s Bed Frosh,” run by MUS; and “Look Dad! I’m in Another City Frosh,” run by SUS. Campus swarmed with underdressed, overdrunk 18-to-20 yearolds for a full week as the bacchanalian festival left heaps of used plastic cups, boxer-shorts and bras, and condoms still in their wrappers on Lower Field.

“These filthy hooligans have tarnished our campus’s beautiful, new turf!” your mother, U5 Biology, exclaimed. “That fucking grass was just installed last week – now we’ll have to plant it all again!”

Meanwhile, the RAMQ has issued a press release warning the population of the Greater Montreal area that supplies of the morningafter pill are running dangerously MTL POP. BOOM EXPECTED, P. 6

Three cheers for McGill! Fuck fuck fuck! I don’t live with my parents anymore!

Fuck this nearly infernal heat

Did you ever see that medieval drawing of hell? It’s in the Hortus deliciarum manuscript. Framed with images of people burning alive, it depicts little imps on four floors torturing people who are surrounded by flames.

Six or seven people – some knights and maybe witches or doctors of some kind – are being boiled alive. Down below some sort of pagan deity is holding a little child in his hands while dogs eat other people and apparently shit fire on some more. And one of the imps is force-feeding some poor schmuck while some placid monk watches curiously, with an outstretched, explanatory hand.

It’s not that hot out now, but if it gets any fucking hotter, it’ll be pretty damn close. I thought we were getting close to fall? Fuckin’…climate change. Sucks.

Fuck This! is an occasional anonymous therapeutic rant column. Send your rants – nothing hateful, just upset – to fuckthis@mcgilldaily.com.

Anonymity guaranteed!

Write for Compendium! I’m looking for fake news, comics (regular comics would be ballin’), fucks these (see above), especially comics, did I mention comics?, also nifty things called 100-word stories (look for one next week; they don’t have to be funny) compendium@mcgilldaily.com