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News

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

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SSMU exec wannabes vie for power ERIN HALE The McGill Daily

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xecutive candidates went head-to-head Tuesday night, arguing over how SSMU should move forward as an independent union and how it should prioritize its bookstore and support for clubs.

Shatner’s Lev Bukhman room was most packed for the final debate between presidential contenders Kay Turner and RJ Kelford.

Turner, current SSMU VP Internal, said she would be the “defender of student life” and would emphasize sustainability at SSMU, as well as greater communication with students.

Though Turner was less specific in her proposals than Kelford, she argued that her experience at SSMU outweighed Kelford’s ideas for change.

“Ideas can fall flat without experience,” Turner said.

Kelford, current A rts Undergraduate Society (AUS) President, presented an ambitious platform for reinvigorating SSMU, arguing the union had “descended into irrelevance.”

“We need to accept that SSMU is not doing well,” he said, pointing to a lack of student participation in committees and lower attendance at General Assemblies (GAs). He emphasized the need to resolve the lack of funding for clubs, reach out to francophones, and improve usage of the Shatner Building.

Kelford lost ground when members of the floor criticized him for a homophobic cheer at Arts Frosh and a lack of consultation on Arts space reallocation. Though starting off shaky, Turner gained confidence

Nadja Popovich / The McGill Daily

SSMU VP External Max Silverman asks a question of his potential replacements at Tuesday’s candidate debate. as the debate pushed on.

Turner and Kelford disagreed on how to improve the GA process at SSMU, which this year was stricken with walk-outs and poor attendance.

Turner defended GAs in principle, saying that SSMU needed to “demystify” the process for students.

Kelford blamed SSMU Council and executives for failing to implement GA resolutions.

“The GA is broken in a big way, and throwing money at it won’t increase turnout,” he said.

But SSMU VP Clubs & Services Marcelle Kosman challenged Kelford’s comment, saying she was “extremely offended” that Kelford claimed SSMU does not see through on GA motions.

The candidates were at odds as to how SSMU should work externally with other student unions, to fight for tuition accessibility. Turner supported SSMU’s decision for independence from any regional or national student association, while Kelford said he would consider starting a new association.

“We’re in an unsustainable place right now,” Kelford said.

The debate on association with outside groups also ran through the VP External Affairs talks between Devin Alfaro, NDP McGill copresident and current SSMU councillor, and Trevor Hanna, a former executive at la Fédération étudiante universitaire du Québec.

Hanna said SSMU must unite with other unions if it hopes to stay polit-

ically relevant, while Alfaro proposed an informal approach of working with other unions and alliances.

But the two candidates differed most on their political outreach plans. Alfaro emphasized the need to continue fighting tuition increases; Hanna argued that efforts would be better served focusing on financial aid and lower transfer payments.

“We need to put tuition fees aside,” Hanna said, calling for prioritizing financial aid and affordable study abroad programs.

The VP Clubs & Services race saw Samantha Cook face off with Johnson Fung; Cook promised to focus on sustainability, autonomy of student groups, and the use of the McGill name, while Fung called for greater web accessibility for clubs and a need to rework the

use of the Shatner building.

The VP Internal race is the most competitive in this election, with four candidates vying for the position. José Diaz, social coordinator of Queer McGill, proposed making SSMU events more inclusive for Muslim and queer students, and said he hoped to bring more speakers and film screenings to McGill.

“Events can go beyond just parties and drinking,” Diaz said.

Julia Webster, this year’s SnowAP director, emphasized her experience with planning large events and also said she would address sustainability and planning social justice events.

Brad Milech, also an experienced event planner, underlined his connections to the Molson company and Montreal nightclubs, and suggested that SSMU shift toward planning off-campus parties and events.

Kevin Chambers, an organizer of Engineering Frosh in his sixth year at McGill, pushed for “Japanese-style nap cubby holes” and No Pants Day, and also emphasized his experience in party planning.

The debates for VP Finance & Operations are now moot; Rishal Mistry rescinded his candidacy after Tuesday night’s event. Peter Newhook is now acclaimed.

Neither demonstrated a strong grasp of the social and political implications of SSMU spending, fielding questions about SSMU’s ethical investment policies with difficulty.

Nadya Wilkinson, a coordinator of Sustainabile McGill, was acclaimed for VP University Affairs. In a brief statement, Wilkinson promised to work for greater transparency and sustainability in SSMU, and to address what she called students’ “disenchantment” with the GA process.

The Daily presents: Your guide to the SSMU elections JENNIFER MARKOWITZ AND NICHOLAS SMITH The McGill Daily

ELECTION GUIDE

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o help you naviagate the Students’ Society of McGill University maze, we offer for your amusement a breakdown of the exec positions, and some issues to watch out for.

President The figurehead of the Students’ Society, the President is responsible for maintaining a productive atmosphere among the executive. As the President supports all of the VPs in their respective projects, he or she also oversees the Society’s direction. Some students feel SSMU has become a largely obsolete organization; it’s ultimately up to the President to turn this around.

General Assemblies have attracted much speculation this year, so McGill undergraduates will need a president who will make the process relevant and attractive. Also, Quebec’s

tuition de-freeze and accessible education remain at the forefront in the President’s portfolio.

Kay Turner, the only current SSMU executive running and two-time Arts Undergraduate Society President RJ Kelford are vying for the position.

External Affairs The VP External is responsible for ensuring undergrads are represented at the municipal, provincial, and federal levels and for mobilizing students. He or she is also SSMU’s link to the Montreal community.

After getting out of three student federations in three years, all on bad terms, SSMU is now flying solo. McGill students must elect a VP External who will keep McGill involved in the world of off-campus student politics.

Candidate Trevor Hanna is a former executive of the Fédération étudiante universitaire du Québec (FEUQ), which SSMU left last year.

His opponent, Devin Alfaro, is currently an Arts rep to SSMU and the co-president of NDP McGill.

Clubs & Services The VP C&S oversees the wellbeing of SSMU’s student clubs, services, and publications. He or she monitors their budgets, allocates office space, and helps new initiatives get off the ground.

The VP C&S faced flak this year from student clubs facing deep funding cuts in the wake of SSMU’s acquisition of Haven Books. As well, the University again went on the offence on groups using the McGill name. Both issues are now forefront in the campaign and VP C & S needs to be prepared to address them. Keen organizational skills are also a necessity for this position.

Johnson Fung and Samantha Cook will be on the ballot for C&S this year.

University Affairs The VP UA is students’ most direct liaison to the Administration, and enjoys interminable meetings with administrators, negotiating student life, and academic programs.

This year, Adrian Angus has highlighted students’ concerns of liability

and increasing red tape regulations.

Students need a VP UA who will work hard to preserve student life on campus and develop an effective relationship with the admin, while checking its ever-encroaching control over Senate and the Board of Governors.

Nadya Wilkinson, acclaimed for the position, brings a strong interest in sustainability and promises to make the position more transparent to students.

Finance & Operations The Fops VP is responsible for overseeing SSMU’s finances, and this position’s desk is already piled high. First on the list: the budget, and Haven Books. With an upstart new bookstore struggling with steep losses, and SSMU clubs and services taking the cut with budget slashes, Haven needs a plan, and fast.

But that’s just the start: Shatner’s Caferama lease expires this summer, another first-floor space is still empty, and Gert’s continues to lose money. Undergraduates need a VP who will not only organize these spaces, but who will make them into

valuable resources for undergrads.

Rushil Mistry dropped out of the race for Fops after Tuesday’s debate, leaving Peter Newhook the acclaimed candidate.

Internal SnowAP, 4Floors, Frosh – they’re all part of the VP Internal’s portfolio.

While this VP should like to party hardy, he or she must also navigate the University’s tightening alcohol restrictions, and engage a largely apathetic and alienated student body.

In the past, the VP Internal has been consumed with the Society’s social calendar, but McGill students need a dynamic VP with a clear political focus.

Accessing McGill’s francophone community is a must for this position, as is a strong grasp of sustainability.

McGill students need to elect a VP who will continue Turner’s greening initiatives, while broadening the variety and accessibility of SSMU’s events.

Kevin Chambers, José Diaz, Brad Milech, and Julia Webster are all competing in the year’s most competitive race.

News

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

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Munroe-Blum talks underfunding, food services

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ur jet-setting principal has been spending much of her time fundraising for Campaign McGill. The Daily got a few minutes out of her busy schedule Tuesday to talk to her about composting, hiring, and administrators.

The McGill Daily: You’ve lobbied hard for the unfreezing of tuition, with the understanding that McGill would continue to demand more support for postsecondary education from Quebec City and Ottawa. At a time where students are now being asked to shoulder more of the weight of tuition, could you do be doing more to push the government for a broad re-investment in education?

Heather Munroe-Blum: There’s been an ideological change within Quebec about how funding should come for universities, and we’ve been making very strong representations on that.

We simply are constrained on every front with respect to getting the revenues that we need. It affects our services to students. It affects our infrastructure in a deep way. It affects the salaries we can give our professors, which affects our retention of professors. We’re very proud of having recruited over 800 professors in the last eight years, but if our salaries don’t stay competitive, then that becomes an issue, too. All of these are really deep concerns and they are far and away, other than what happens within the University and what we’re doing to work within the University, my greatest preoccupation.

MD: Last month McGill accepted money from Boeing due to its recent deal with the Canadian government for C-17 planes for Afghanistan. Some have suggested that McGill needs to have a more stringent policy on acceptable sources of funding. Do you think we need that?

the trucks picking up the compost here and trucking it to Macdonald campus would offset totally the environmental benefits. In fact we have our own composting process on campus here and it’s working quite well.

It seems like all of our social and environmental concerns revolve around preserving the mountain, which is important, but it’s a small part compared to the use of SUVs and recycling and the way we use energy.

I’ve seen over five and a half years, a transformation of the University.

The fact that we have a professor of Environmental Sciences who is an activist, is himself in charge of our facilities and our garbage and energy use and all that, I feel proud of that, and he’s a terrific person. From what I understand, on composting that was his response and he feels very good about what we’re doing. On projects, he says that, raising the price on parking fees has created a fund of $200,000, which is going to environmental projects and it’s also a disincentive to park on campus. It’s two for one.

HMB: Look, we’ve got a committee that looks already at our investment practices. We have taken one area that – on a principled basis – we will not accept money that comes from tobacco. Other than I think that we’ve got a very healthy framework.

I think we have to say that first of all, we don’t take money for military purposes; we take it for academic purposes, consistent with our priorities. And we believe that doing what universities do is a helpful influence in the world. That’s true for whoever we’re working with.

MD: With this year’s Architecture Café debacle, and the University moving to strip student groups of the use of the McGill name, more than ever it seems McGill is concerned with liability issues. How would you respond to concerns that these are anti-student initiatives?

HMB: There will always be issues; we are a huge organization.

There are 45,000 people that make up this community. We’re a little town, in a way.

Our reputation is without question one of our greatest assets, and it’s that and our commitment to the quality of people who are here, our students and our faculty and the research and teaching are what have helped us to prevail in spite of very, very dramatic underfunding against our peers in the rest of Canada and south of the border and much of the Western world. Protecting our reputation is something we must do, and the clubs and societies’ naming issue arose when SSMU itself didn’t want to have its name attached to a Gun Club a couple of years back, just to put things in perspective.

MD: McGill was ranked poorly for food services in a Maclean’s survey this year. Many in the McGill community are calling for more student-run food initiatives.

Is this something you would support?

Dominic Popowich / The McGill Daily

Heather Munroe-Blum sits down with The Daily.

HMB: I see no evidence that student-run initiatives work better on the food, quality, variety, and pricing size.

The real question is, how do we determine what kind of food services we have at the University? I think we need a business model that’ll work. We need health and safety regulations followed. The question then is: who are the suppliers? What range of variety do we have on our campuses? What pricing points do we have? I think that those are all up for discussion.

MD: You’ve mentioned in the past that sustainability is something that deserves attention at McGill, and you’ve expressed support for pilot environmental projects. Yet McGill couldn’t foot the bill when it came to starting a pilot project with Gorilla Composting.

HMB: I understand the whole no-Gorilla Composting issue differently. What I understand is that this is an environmental issue and that the environmental damage done by

MD: There has been hiring of more top administrators from outside the McGill community in the past several years, instead of inside McGill’s ranks of professors. Who best knows how to run a university: professors, or corporate managers from the external sector?

HMB: There’s some talk about us staffing up, sort of how many people there are in James Administration and how many people there are overall. We’re just getting in line with our peer universities. We’ve been under-led in that regard. And, again, when you look at the scale of the operation, our mission, and our aspirations, being well-managed and having very elite academic leaders is what’s good for the University. It’s my job to make sure it works well.

– compiled by Kelly Ebbels and Jennifer Markowitz

Montreal Citizen Forum advocates peace in Afghanistan Speakers, audience divided on Canada’s role JAMES ALBAUGH News Writer

P

eace was the message Tuesday night, when the Montreal Citizen Forum hosted a lively discussion on Canada’s military mission in Afghanistan.

The meeting, at St. James United Church downtown, brought together former and current UN officials and lobbyists as well as journalists, activists, and community members to discuss alternatives to Canada’s role in the war.

Peggy Mason, Canada’s former Ambassador for Disarmament at the United Nations, argued that a war

mission in Afghanistan was failing the region.

“The present strategy is delivering Afghanistan to the hardliners,” Mason said.

She contended that the only possible mediator in an Afghan peace process is the UN. Stephen Staples, Director of the Rideau Institute on International Affairs, a think tank based in Ottawa, argued that Canada’s involvement in the Afghanistan war reflected what he called the “Americanization” of Canada’s armed forces.

He contended that Canada’s military culture now relies on concepts imported from the Pentagon, citing Defense Chief Richard Hillier’s involvement in the U.S. Army. Hillier entered a U.S.-Canada officer exchange program in 1998 and served as deputy

commander of the III Armored Corps of the U.S. Army at Fort Hood, Texas.

Staples discussed Hillier’s references to the “transformation” of Canada’s armed forces, which he described as a shift away from peacekeeping toward combat.

“We just repeat the terms and hope someone will figure out what they mean later,” Staples said, comparing Hillier’s language to Newspeak from George Orwell’s 1984.

Mason also criticized the Independent Panel on Canada’s Future Role in Afghanistan, which published the Manley Report recommending Canada’s continued involvement there, and argued that the panel was not truly independent.

She said that the report’s recommendations were too similar to Prime Minister Harper’s proposals. Both

Harper and the Manley Report favour increased troop numbers and an extension of the armed presence to 2011.

But Jooneeb Khan, International Affairs journalist at La Presse, took issue with Mason’s confidence in the UN, noting the skepticism many developing nations have toward the organization and the flaws in the organization’s structure, which he believes favours an elite group of countries.

“The UN itself needs to be balanced – in fact, needs to be reorganized,” Khan said.

Raymond Legault, a spokesperson for anti-war group Échec à la guerre, agreed that the UN needed overhauling, but stressed that it is often used to justify intervention, which he opposed.

Some audience members questioned the practical problems with forc-

ing a peace process through the UN. “I don’t understand practically how you get the Taliban to sit down with the powers that be,” said Sasha Mandy, a law student at the Université de Montréal.

Others drew parallels with other international conflicts. One audience member noted Haiti as a precedent for Canadian involvement in Afghanistan.

Jakov Rabkin, a history professor at the Université de Montréal, compared Canadian involvement in Afghanistan with Israel’s occupation of the West Bank, arguing that both were neo-colonial efforts by governments without majority support.

Staples suggested that Canadians recall the country’s former role as a peaceful nation.

“This is a fight for Canada’s soul,” he said.

News

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

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Students skip out on Principal’s Town Hall Faculty members, postgraduates bring funding woes to Munroe-Blum SHANNON KIELY The McGill Daily

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here was hardly a backpack in sight when the Town Hall meeting with Principal Heather Munroe-Blum opened the floor to over 60 faculty members and just 10 students at the Shatner Ballroom Tuesday afternoon to discuss “what makes a great university.”

In her opening speech, MunroeBlum remarked on the low proportion of students in the audience as compared to Town Halls held each semester throughout the past four years.

“This is our first time in a student building, and this is the least amount of students we’ve seen in the group,” she said.

Audience members suggested that student presence was lacking because the meeting was scheduled at an inconvenient time for undergrads – from noon to 1:30 p.m. on a day during midterms and campaign week.

Munroe-Blum countered she held the town hall at noon to encourage staff and faculty attendance, which had been low in previous years when the meetings had been more accommodating of student schedules.

After the meeting, SSMU President Jake Itzkowitz said he was unconvinced that an increase in advertising would have boosted student attendance at Town Hall.

“I would say it’s a combination of timing and apathy,” Itzkowitz said of the poor attendance.

He compared Tuesday’s low turn-

Sarah Youngson for The McGill Daily

Unlike other Town Halls geared towards student schedules, Tuesday’s lunchtime meeting attracted mostly McGill faculty and staff. out to that of February’s General Assembly, which attracted only 120 students at its peak despite the fact that SSMU spent $4,000 on advertising, room bookings, and refreshments for the event.

Following questions on issues ranging from sustainability policies to training for Teaching Assistants, SSMU VP University Affairs Adrian Angus described the stress that students experience when asking for reference letters from professors of large classes.

“My friends worried they hadn’t had enough interaction with the professors and that the letters would just say: this student attended my class and got an A-,” he said, adding that students feared rejection from competitive post-

graduate programs based on weak reference letters.

Munroe-Blum said that the reference letter issue was the single item that prompted her to found the Task Force on Student Life and Learning, but that she has yet to hear from any students on the subject since. She assured the audience that McGill makes student-professor interaction a priority through advising and mentoring.

Slawomir Poplawski, a technician in the Department of Mining and Metallurgical Engineering, insisted that Munroe-Blum was out of touch with students because she doesn’t teach undergraduate classes.

Mentioning former Principal Bernard Shapiro’s continued commitment to teaching throughout his

term, Poplawski wondered how the lack of feedback from students would impact Munroe-Blum’s understanding of the undergraduate experience with large and crowded classes.

Munroe-Blum defended her personal decision to decline from taking on undergraduate teaching.

“I know my schedule and teaching would make it too disruptive....

It’s an individual decision,” she said.

In a shift to funding issues, PhD architecture student Mehran Gharaati questioned McGill’s claim as an outstanding research university, alleging the Architecture PhD program has no budget.

“How is that possible? Is there some magic spell?” Gharaati said.

Munroe-Blum said Gharaati was the first to enlighten her on the lack

of funding in his department.

Having paid $53,000 for his program, Gharaati said he was upset about having missed five conferences due to the Architecture PhD program’s inability to sponsor him.

Munroe-Blum explained that McGill is short $100-million dollars every year because of low tuition fees and decreasing financial support from the Quebec government.

The Principal consistently reminded the audience that McGill must uphold its reputation – what she regards as one of the university’s best assets – from an underfunded context.

“We have to be strategic. Every penny has to go towards where we can advance as a university.”

International Women’s Day takes to the streets to fight gender inequality Saturday’s events to bring attention to abuse of live-in caregivers, police brutality EMILY GENNIS News Writer

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rawing greater attention to gender inequality, police brutality, and abuse of livein caregivers are some of the goals of the seventh annual International Women’s Day demonstration, to be held at the Université de Montreal front campus gates Saturday.

The organizers, the Coordination and Action Committee of Women of Diverse Origins, hope to bring women’s issues to the forefront of social discourse and link them to other societal ills like poverty, deportation, and racial profiling.

According to the blog No One Is Illegal Montreal, the event’s theme this year is “women take back demo-

cratic space,” and a major point is to remember the police brutality that occurred at last year’s demonstration.

“Gender inequality and violence go hand in hand,” said Mubeenah Mughal, a contributor for the blog and an organizer of the event.

“People think that feminism is not relevant, that women have it all, but our rights are being taken away.”

Last year’s event, which focused on international gender issues, ended abruptly when police struck three women – including a 17-yearold – in the chest and face with night sticks and arrested one man. Police said that they were trying to move protesters out of the street and onto the sidewalk.

“The ironic thing,” Mughal said,

“was that the one person who did common cause of fighting social move onto the sidewalk was the one injustice.

“International Women’s Day is celwho got arrested.”

Another topic will be plight of ebrated everywhere,” said Mughal. female live-in caregivers and domes- “The idea is to express solidarity tic workers, who are often subjected to various forms The idea is to express of abuse by their employers. solidarity with women Speakers at this year’s around the world. demonstration will include representatives – Mubeenah Mughal from a Tamil advocacy International Women’s Day demonstration organizer group and l’Association pour une solidarité syndicale étudiante (ASSÉ), a radical with women around the world.”

Mughal stressed that gender student federation representing student unions comprising over discrimination certainly exists in Canada.

40,000 students.

“I’m not trying to compare the Mughal believed that the demonstration should unite women condition of women here to their conthroughout the world under the dition in other places,” she said, “but

“

women still struggle here, and what happened last year highlights this.”

Although the violence that marred last year’s demonstration received scant media attention, Mughal suggested it showed some parallels between Canada and other countries where gender discrimination is institutionalized.

“They struggle against gender violence, we struggle against police brutality,” Mughal noted.

The demonstration will represent the steps that have yet to be taken towards gender equality, but it will also represent what has been accomplished so far.

“It will be empowering because of what happened last year.

Women are going to come out and support our cause despite intimidation.”

10

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mcgilldaily.com has a new look After months of trials and tribulations, the Daily’s web site is finally getting with the times. This doozie of a facelift include two brand-new blogs, one by Jay Ploss on cycling, and the editors’ blog, where you can read the rantings of Daily editors. Plus, you can now sidestep our cheeky Letters editor with our new comment feature, where you can directly post your thoughts about our articles.

The Daily

Art Supplement

2007-2008

Rebecca Wild PJ Vogt

Anthony Scotti 2

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

Dominic Popowich

Ming Lin

3

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

Sarah Youngson

David Pullmer Ben Peck 4

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

Nadja Popovich Anonymous

5

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

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The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

Eric Arsenault

Margo Warren

Sasha Plotnikova

Noelani Eidse

7

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

Susannah Lee

Kristen Dobbin 8

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

Marianna Reis

9

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

10 The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

Alyssa Bauer

Veronika Horlik

Sarah Malekzadeh

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Rosie Aiello

The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

12 The McGill Daily | 2008 Art Supplement

April Martin

Natalie Dionne

Theo Ephraim

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

Photo Essay

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By Guillermina Lasarte

The poetics of urban space

Commentary

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

Readers rally to Daily’s side in time of peril!

Appreciating Hive Mind... sarcastically?

Letters Vote Yes for student autonomy!

Never mind to which McGill press we are partial; as students of McGill University, we are mystified as to why the relevance of The McGill Daily is being questioned in the upcoming referendum. Not only does The Daily play an integral role in the landscape and history of this University, but it remains the only free, independent, student press on campus.

The continued existence of The McGill Daily is not an issue of left v. right politics, rather, it is fundamentally a question of students’ rights to autonomy and free speech. Every member of this University benefits from an independent press. Regardless of one’s political ideology, a vote for The Daily is a vote for free speech.

Lee Fiorio U2 Geography Adele Meyer U2 Sociology

Daily locks in crucial Kosman endorsement One day, several months ago, I had interviews with both The McGill Daily and The McGill Tribune during the same hour.

There was probably some emergency – my guess a club got less funding than it wanted, but I’m not sure.

While I was meeting with the Daily writer, the writer from The Trib stopped by to see if I was free. It was at that moment – that exact moment with the Daily writer slouched on my sofa in his skinny black jeans, sneakers, red plaid unbuttoned flannel over a t-shirt, juxtaposed with the Trib writer in his ironed collared shirt, clean jeans and business-casual shoes – that I realized exactly why both campus papers are so important for the Students’ Society. It’s not only about having a different perspectives. It’s not only about “independent” versus “official.”

It’s not only about style. Campus newspapers give students learning experience and training in journalism.

We need both The Tribune and The Daily because neither of those journalists would have worked for the other paper, but they both deserve the introduction to journalism. If two papers aren’t enough, don’t shut one down; start up a third!

And that’s why I’m voting Yes for The Daily.

Marcelle Kosman U3 English Literature SSMU VP Clubs and & Services

Re: “Valentine’s Day is possibly worse than Christmas” | Commentary | Feb 21, 2008 I’d like to congratulate The Daily on its excellent humour column, Hive Mind. It’s usually spot on, and the latest instalment did not disappoint – Ms. Herra-Vega’s carefully cultivated satiric persona was in fine form on the ticklish subject of Valentine’s Day. You just have to admire the ruthless artistry with which the piece imitates and skewers the self-important drudgery that so often passes for cultural commentary. The notion of the holiday being a cunning scheme to inflict vicious norms on the marginalized was particularly masterful in its sublime empty-headedness, but the column hit several other classic notes with aplomb: instinctive behaviour is a capitalist crime; celebration, in a nicely Orwellian turn, is really the denigration of those who do not celebrate; love is a calculated insult to the loveless, families a fiendish affront to the unmarried. It perfectly captures the faults of the politically correct mind. “Colonialism Day”?

Comic gold. But – and here’s where the column shines – it’s more than that. At the heart of her ironical artichoke, Ms. Herra-Vega has cleverly concealed a fresh and trenchant cultural critique: in some respects the popular observance of holidays tends towards, yes, the crass.

Keep up the good work! It’s fine satire such as this that should reduce bona fide drudges to shamed silence, simply by situating the gold standard for mealy-mouthed hackery in a humour column where everybody can freely laugh at its silliness. We should all do more to commend Ms. Herra-Vega for her efforts to raise the level of public discourse.

Stuart Wright U3 English Literature

Anti-Daily blogger publishes letter in Daily, misses irony Re: “An editor’s look at the plagiarism allegations” | Commentary | Feb 21, 2008 In his Comment, Drew Nelles writes: “Mahler says members of the Ethics Committee have told him they consider this a case of plagiarism, even with the citation.” This conveys that Nelles himself hadn’t read those Ethics members’ responses. Untrue.

He had and was aware that they had seen his email and arguments.

Nelles argues: “The easy thing to do would have been to consider this plagiarism despite the advice we received to the contrary, run a retraction, and move on. As a reward for following the professional advice we received…”

Does Nelles think so little of McGill students? Not printing any kind of retraction or note for readers was clearly the easiest thing to do before The Tribune made things public. The Harvard Crimson did a

retraction, without considering anything “plagiarism,” and discontinued a column for much less unattributed similarities to texts. A lawyer is not responsible for the unprofessional course chosen by Nelles and co-editors. (And plagiarism is not a legal concept; copyright infringement is.)

As for the public editor: Before this controversy, three major incidents (involving our Features editor) transpired. Each resulted in Errata, without sensible changes to editorial policy that would have prevented the next incident. But the public editor shrugs them off as “minor,” including dailywatch.wordpress. com/2008/01/02/the-daily-printserrors-about-the-rachel-corrieplay-strangely-all-relating-to-jewish-pressure-how-did-this-happen/ Szpajda could have researched which incidents are a big deal to professional editors, and recommended editorial policies to address such problems or increase journalistic accountability. Does Szpajda only care whether The Daily is “too activist”?

McGill students deserve the most for their money. The policies of independent, egalitarian-style newspapers at Harvard and other universities show that with The Daily, they are not getting as much as they should.

That said, I’m voting Yes, with the hope that The Daily finally becomes radical enough to change its own status quo.

Adam Mahler U3 English

Trib writer condescends verbosely Re: “Students trash military ads in Tribune” | Commentary | Feb 21, 2008 I must take this opportunity to thank you for lending legitimacy to a pack of juvenile vandals who clearly have far too much time on their hands. Indeed it can be said that the entire “demilitarize McGill” campaign has been characterized by infantile grousing and a severely misguided world view. They have obviously been reading too many Naomi Klein books (i.e. more than zero Naomi Klein books). By tearing pages out of The McGill Tribune and demanding that military ads be pulled, or else, these pedomorphic activists have demonstrated their inability to engage in civilized discussion. I suppose by resorting to name-calling I have myself have deviated from civilized discussion. Unfortunately it has become painfully clear that nothing other than this sort of “direct action” will be comprehensible to the undergraduate activist, that great crusader purifying our campus of all things profligate and all semblances of the real world.

Vote Yes for The Daily SARAH COLGROVE AND ERIKA MEERE

HYDE PARK

W

ith campaign week in full swing, we’d like to take a few moments to explain to you, dear Daily readers, what we’re asking you to vote on, and why we think you should vote Yes. This year, as it has to do every few years, the Daily Publications Society (DPS) – that’s the umbrella organization that publishes The Daily and Le Délit – sat down with McGill to renegotiate our Memorandum of Agreement (MoA). This document is essential to our existence, as it covers The Daily’s right to rent space from McGill, the use of the McGill name, and McGill’s obligation to collect fees on our behalf.

For the first time ever, the McGill administration has made the MoA conditional upon undergraduates passing a referendum to continue supporting their newspapers with the current $5 per semester fee.

Similar demands were made of campus radio station CKUT and the McGill chapter of the Quebec Public Interest Research Group last year, and will continue to be made every time these independent student groups have to sign a new MoA with McGill. To be perfectly clear, The Daily is not asking for any fee increase, only for your continued support of this newspaper. Should it lose this referendum, The Daily will cease to exist in its current form.

A No vote would mean a very real loss to student life at McGill. Since its inception in 1911, The Daily has been McGill's newspaper of record, run entirely for and by students.

Its earliest volumes document the ups and downs of McGill sports teams, and the impact of the First World War on McGill and Montreal.

In the 1960s, the Daily reported on the wave of intense demonstrations against the Vietnam war, tuition fee increases, and everything in between. Today, it covers the issues that affect you as a McGill student, everything from profiles of up-andcoming student bands to the current postsecondary underfunding crisis in Quebec.

Besides simply reporting on the issues of the day, The Daily seeks to catalyze change in the McGill community and beyond. From the sexual assault centre’s fight for office space to the corporatization of food services on campus, it has never shied away from holding campus authorities to account, and from alternative burlesque to gentrification, it makes a point of covering issues other media ignore. Although this paper’s readers may not always agree with the stances it takes, we hope they recognize that a strong, independent student press is nonetheless crucial to ensuring a democratic campus culture.

Ultimately, The Daily is your paper.

Twice a week, The Daily publishes every letter it receives from you, the members of the Daily Publications Society, giving students a space to speak out on and debate the issues of the day. As a student-run publication, it relies on you to contribute articles, artwork, and photos, as well as to oversee the financial and legal realities of publishing on its Board of Directors. It is you that has made The Daily the award-winning newspaper it has become, and you that can set its direction in the years to come. Please vote Yes to keep your paper alive.

Sarah Colgrove and Erika Meere serve on the Daily Publications Society Board of Directors and are members of this referendum’s Yes committee.

James Gilman U0 Political Science & Economics Tribune writer Send letters to letters@mcgilldaily. com. The Daily has received more letters than can be printed here.

They will appear in the next issue.

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Ming Lin / The McGill Daily

Mind&Body

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

14

Out of the shtetl and into the world

/ The McGill Daily

Ousama Damalas, physiology, Mohamed Shaheen, electrical engineering, and Bilal Ruzzeh, mechanical engineer

Sasha Plotnikova / The McGill Daily

ELISSA GURMAN The McGill Daily

I

have recently made a controversial move: I fell in love. And although he is not a Montague, nor I a Capulet, and although neither of us are members of the Jets or the Sharks, some might say that I am sleeping with the enemy. You see, I am Jewish. I’ve managed, to my family’s chagrin, to fall in love with a goy, a gentile – a non-Jew. To be more precise, I am in a relationship with a Christian Arab.

I know this is 2008 and Jews are out of the shtetl and into the world, but to my family, and many families like mine, an interfaith relationship is a big no-no.

Many non-Jews just don’t see why, and to be honest, sometimes I don’t entirely get it myself. I’m not dating a delinquent or a drug dealer – just a nice boy studying at a good school. Still, my father won’t talk to him.

My boyfriend doesn’t understand why our relationship presents a problem to my family. He takes it personally, and I don’t blame him. He can date whoever he wants. Religion is not an issue for him.

In an effort to understand the issue of interfaith relationships, I have conducted short, informal interviews with several of my Jewish friends. I simply asked them why they think Jews don’t date or marry outside the faith, and why they have

chosen to follow or not follow this tradition.

Reaching out One friend gave me a helpful response: “Jews have always felt battered and outcast. We band together because there is strength in solidarity. I can’t say that I wouldn’t date a non-Jew; it all depends on the person. But it’s hard to anticipate the problems that an interfaith relationship might cause.” She’s right: on the whole, it’s just simpler to date Jews. Heck, I’d be having an easier time if I just stuck to “my people.”

What I want to make clear is that this is not an issue of racism; my father doesn’t ignore my boyfriend because he thinks non-Jews are inferior. He disapproves because to marry a non-Jew would entail a dilution of the faith and the community, and a rejection of my family’s values.

One friend gave me an answer along those lines, a view I always thought I ascribed to: “Why don’t Jews date non-Jews? We just don’t.

I don’t date non-Jews because I wouldn’t ever want to date someone I couldn’t think of marrying. I could never marry a non-Jew. It would kill my parents, never mind my grandparents. It just isn’t done. I want to raise a Jewish family.”

I often joke about being raised to be a Jewish baby-making machine.

Of course I’m not being entirely serious – I do want a career and

independent success before I breed – but to some extent it’s true. I want to raise a Jewish family. I love being Jewish, and I want to give that to my children. But why can’t I do that, and still date or even marry a gentile?

One woman I interviewed thinks she can. She has been dating a gentile for three years now, but maintains her faith nonetheless. Her grandparents are Holocaust survivors, and although her mother is none too pleased, she loves this man. She told me not to worry: “If you’re anything like me, you have a strong Jewish identity. It’s a part of who you are. Nothing can shake, damage, or change that.”

I hope she’s right, but I do think this experience has changed the way I think about my Jewish identity. Although I’m not especially religious, I was sent to Jewish schools and camps all my life. Part of the purpose of this was to learn about the faith, of course, but it was also about meeting fellow Jews in the hope that I would socialize with, and eventually marry into, the community.

I’m not complaining: I love being a part of the Jewish community. But I always thought I would have a choice about who I spent the rest of my life with.

Not a political statement One friend that I interviewed congratulated me on finally asserting my independence. She jauntily

told me, in so many words, to “fuck religion and fuck my parents.” To her, religion is some deranged, outmoded phenomenon responsible for half the world’s problems.

That may well be, but then I have to ask myself: am I dating a nonJew to make a political statement?

Can my relationship be reduced to some kind of belated teenage rebellion?

I sure hope not. I am not a radical or a rebel. And it brings me to tears to think that falling in love has to become political. I’m not trying to offend my parents or change the status quo; I’m just trying to be happy.

I’d never really associated my Jewish identity with anything negative until I started dating outside of the faith. Although my Jewish education taught me to marry a Jew, my Disney education taught me that true love conquers all. I had a fuzzy idea that the two might conflict, but I never bothered myself much about it. Unfortunately, things don’t seem to have worked themselves out as effortlessly as I had hoped.

Individual v. community I’m torn. On the one hand, I have all my individual wants and needs. I want to be with this boy. He makes me happy. So, from one perspective, I am angry at my parents and I am confused about my religion. If Judaism connotes not only a positive and strong community but also

an exclusive one, is that really what I want?

But on the other hand, I see where my family is coming from: a large part of my identity is Jewish.

I see myself as a part of something.

I love being a part of the Jewish people. But what exactly is it about Judaism that I love? It’s not the praying, or the laws, or all the stuff about God. It’s the people. I love the feeling of community, the knowledge that a Jew will always help another Jew. I realize that I cannot make a decision independent of my faith, because while I would be following my heart, I would also be diluting what I love so much about being Jewish.

My children wouldn’t have, to the same extent, what I have. In some way, I would be destroying something I love simply by loving.

To me, that is the central conflict of an interfaith relationship – that conflict between what’s best for an individual, and what’s best for the community.

Even though this religion issue has caused me much grief and familial tension, I cannot say that I regret dating a non-Jew. Ultimately, the experience has taught me more about my Jewish identity than all my years at parochial school: I have learned that fundamentally, my appreciation of Judaism is community-based – it is about loving relations between people. And in that case, I have to wonder why I should feel guilty about falling in love.

Culture

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

16

The path of slavery, or the path of the star?

Aesthetic and politics rub up against each other in director Mikhail Kalatozov’s Soy Cuba BRADEN GOYETTE The McGill Daily

W

hile Soviet agitprop might not exactly be renowned for its nuanced depiction of human beings, Mikhail Kalatozov’s Soy Cube (I Am Cuba) mixes poetry and polemic in a way that takes it beyond crass indoctrination.

“We saw the film as a kind of poem, as a poetic narrative,” cinematographer Sergei Urusevsky told Iskusstvo Kino magazine in 1965.

The director’s strong visual sense is already apparent in the opening scene as the camera pans in from above, showing the glimmering ocean, the forests of slender palms. Over top of these scenes comes the disembodied voice of Cuba, soft-spoken and feminine, self-assured with a clean edge of regret. She addresses Christopher Columbus, quoting how he praised her beauty, and thanking him for the compliment. The voice broaches the contradictions of mid-century Cuba through the metaphor of its major commodity: “A strange thing, sugar.

Señor Columbus – it contains so many tears, but it is sweet.”

The camera jumps to scenes of glamour and decadence – bathing beauties in a rooftop pool against the backdrop of the Havana skyline.

Kalatozov has an eye for seductive images, and it’s with this fine visual sense that he makes some of his most nuanced statements. The attractions of this colonial paradise are clear, though his quarry is the injustice underneath.

The film follows the four “typical” Cubans, taking us from the streets of Havana to the vast sugar cane fields of the countryside. The stories func-

Courtesy of Mongrel Media

tion more as symbolic tableaux than accounts of actual people; unsurprisingly, the film got a poor reception in Cuba for its use of cultural stereotypes. We see a girl forced to prostitute herself out to the rich foreigners, or a hardworking family man whose land gets sold out from under him to United Fruit. The film’s subjects often come off as caricatures: American men are pigs, American women are glamorous accessories, Cuban men are generous and self-sacrificing, and Cuban women, finally, are noble-hearted damsels in distress.

Still, there are some interesting moments that don’t follow the expected story line. All of the main characters get one moment of intense inner

struggle, conveyed through spinning cameras and montages. In the dance club, being tossed from one wealthy American lecher to another, Maria reels away and tries to regain control by dancing even harder. Another scene features university students talking about killing Batista’s successors one after another. The one female student among them asks: “Then how will we spend the rest of our lives?”

The film has a knack for giving complex problems a simple, compact expression, which makes sense, considering a poet wrote the screenplay. Yevgeny Aleksandrovich Yevtushenko was an active dissident throughout the Stalinist area, and currently enjoys international fame.

Criticized in Russia for not being adequately revolutionary, the film depicts individual helplessness and indecision almost as much as it does oppression, the way systems trap people and grind them down. This dynamic comes out in a recurring visual motif, involving numerous shots of the characters in desolate isolation, dwarfed against the landscape: the vast sugar cane fields, the city, and the sea. It’s one of the more human propaganda pieces I’ve seen–– and going after a BA in German and Chinese culture, I’ve had to see a few.

Many of the characters start off unwilling to kill. Enrique, the heroic student militant, is unable to bring

himself to shoot a man who’s already eliminated some of his fellow students.

When asked why, he answers simply: “I couldn’t. He was having fried eggs for breakfast.” When a guerrilla fighter turns up at the home of Mariano the farmer and tries to persuade him to join the revolution, Mariano tells him: “These hands aren’t for killing; they’re for sowing.” The man replies: “But the land they’re sowing isn’t yours.”

Particularly in the confrontations between students and police, Kalatozov shows an aversion to revolutionary violence, but ultimately deems it necessary. In one highly symbolic scene, a flock of doves is shown flying over the city, against the sounds of police orders and machine gun fire. Enrique picks up a dove that’s been shot and holds it up in front of him with an accusing stare, placing responsibility for the death of peace squarely in the hands of the authorities.

“There are two paths for people when they are born,” the voice of Cuba says. “The path of slavery, it crushes and decays. And the path of the star, it illuminates but kills. You will choose the star.” The film ends – surprise! – with a revolutionary calls to arms.

Above and beyond its ideological content, Soy Cuba is visually stunning, and it’s not difficult to understand why it garnered acclaim from big names like Martin Scorsese and Francis Ford Coppola.

What one won’t get is the sense that revolutions, like the systems they fight against, are also made by flawed human beings.

It is propaganda, after all.

Soy Cuba plays between March 7 and 11 at Cinema du Parc. For more information visit cinemaduparc.com.

Favela drama turns melodrama in Paulo Morelli’s City of Men The City of God sequel fails to live up to its predecessor, despite talented leads and stellar cinéma vérité techniques BENJAMIN BROWN Culture Writer

C

ity of Men, the looselydefined sequel to 2002’s City of God, takes us back to Dead End Hill, one of the many slums in Rio de Janeiro. Where City of God leaves off with a young man’s development into a photojournalist, City of Men picks up following best friends Ace and Wallace on the cusp of adulthood.

This sequel distinguishes itself from City of God in being a story about survival, rather than one

about growing up. Thus, the question remains: does City of Men live up to the ingenuity of the original?

(Answer: nope.)

Director Paulo Morelli’s formal realist approach is countered by the story’s overly theatrical plot. City of Men’s familiar overarching theme is the absence of fathers: the film follows Wallace’s search for his paternal roots and Ace’s frustration with the burden of raising his unwanted son. However, it fails to answer the question of what links a connection with the past and hope for the future to a turbulent and uncertain present. Rather, what drives

the narrative is a routine series of events common to gangster-themed films: tested loyalties, blistering violence, tough choices – you name it.

The familiar plotlines and unconvincing melodrama do little to save the film from mediocrity.

That said, City of Men isn’t without its strong qualities. The two leads (Douglas Silva and Darlan Cunha) pull off their roles effortlessly. This comes as little surprise given that Silva and Cunha portrayed their characters Ace and Wallace in the hit Brazilian television series Cidade dos Homens from 2002 to 2005. The two actors play their roles with a fleshed-out sense of humanity in the midst of chaotic struggle, like much of the ensemble of City of Men’s predecessor.

Sadly, this does not extend to the rest of Morelli’s cast of charac-

ters. For instance, there’s Midnight, a stereotypical warlord with simplistic motives and questionable reasoning. Now this is fine and dandy – who am I to object when a warlord is portrayed as a shameless maniac?

But what really busts my chops is the film’s half-hearted attempt to give him some depth about twothirds of the way through, during a dialogue he shares with Ace. Oh! And here I was thinking he was a crazy, gun-slinging lunatic. No, he’s human. Right. Then there’s Wallace’s father, who enters and leaves the film’s narrative rather abruptly and without much explanation. The problem with the film’s supporting actors is their lack of credibility as whole characters, and their often awkward integration into the plot.

Thankfully, Morelli has toned

down the breakneck pacing, the supersonic editing, and general “MTVision” of City of God. If you’ve seen the film, you will agree that this comes with a degree of relief. Unlike City of God, City of Men goes more Quentin Tarantino than Tony Scott.

Equipped with traditional cinéma vérité techniques, Morelli’s formal delivery offers a certain magnetism and makes the claustrophobia of the slums palpable.

City of Men’s many storylines are precariously balanced, and it fails to flesh any of them out realistically.

The film risks triteness and, ultimately, it lacks the candidness and stark believability of City of God. In a world where it’s sink or swin, City of Men unfortunately capsizes.

City of God is currently playing at AMC Forum (2313 Ste. Catherine O.).

Culture

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

Putting a collage into motion McGill dance troup Mosiaca returns with another colourful experiment in movement, sound, and music

In the Wash I celebrate the whipping wind

ERICA ADELSON Culture Writer

that shatters our skin like plaster

A

ttention students wishing to escape the mental exhaustion of midterm season: you will certainly find enjoyment in resting your brains and pleasing your eyes and ears at this year’s Mosaica performance, All in Your Mind. Mosaica is McGill’s student-run contemporary dance ensemble. The company incorporates a variety of dance styles including jazz, ballet, hip hop, modern, and contemporary for one singularly creative production.

Over the past few weeks, I have been fortunate enough to sit in on some Mosaica practices and observe the blood, sweat, and scrapes that go into creating a 22-piece event. Each company member is given an opportunity to choreograph; as a result, the show is truly a collective effort.

Mosaica offers dancers an opportunity to exhibit their ingenuity and hard work – and as an innocent bystander, it was impossible to tell the professional dancers from the novices.

One of the pieces I observed was a lyrical number choreographed by Lauren Robinson to Keri Noble’s ballad “Look at Me.” The piece has six dancers, one male and five females.

Each brings a strength and enthusiasm that complements their fellow performers. No one dancer monopolizes centre stage, yet they each have a brief moment in the limelight. As choreographer Stephanie Daub tells me, “the show is not a competition, but an opportunity for dancers to perform for friends, family, and eager audiences.”

Mosaica is hoping to top last year’s performance by diversifying their program and showcasing the company’s recent changes. Following their annual October auditions, Mosaica took on 11 new dancers, increased its focus on lyr-

17

into the rain.

Because the rain breaks us like a wishbone.

But I cannot see.

If I am the wish or you are the bone.

– Mahak Jain Stephen Davis / The McGill Daily

ical and hip-hop, and gave each of the group’s 20 members an opportunity to choreograph a number in the show.

Mosaica is decidedly supportive of equality among dancers. “Our dancers came from different studios and got different training. It’s great to see how each person brings their own talents to the dances,” says Daub.

Mosaica intends to further enhance the show with video features and special guests. During costume changes, audiences will get a behind-the-scenes look at the company’s creative process: a montage of interviews, audition clips, and practices will be projected on stage. One of McGill’s a cappella

groups, Tonal Ecstasy, will also take the stage at the performance’s intermission.

Dance performances have become increasingly accessible in the last 10 years with the marriage of straight-toDVD hip-hop movies and on-demand cable television. If the sharp choreography and booty-popping in Stomp the Yard, Step Up or Take the Lead have whet your appetite for expressive dance, come see it live at Mosaica.

First Thaw From the back-porch the lawn appears as a retreating ice-cap revealing many months of cigarette butts thrown hastily to the cold.

Stashed by the fence, a brittle brown Christmas tree All in Your Mind plays March 6 to 8, at 8 p.m. at the Gesu Theatre (1200 Bleury). For tickets call 514-861-4036.

and three broken china plates that have appeared mysteriously from under snow.

CULTURE BRIEFS Making music the scientific way If the name José Gonzalez isn’t already familiar, you may have unwittingly come across his music while watching the stunning Sony Bravia commercial shot in San Francisco (the one featuring the multicoloured balls bouncing down the city’s paved hills).

For the video, he recorded a cover of The Knife’s “Heartbeats.” In fact, he’s pretty well-known for putting his own spin on a couple of other timeless favourites: Joy Division’s “Love Will Tear Us Apart,” Bruce Springsteen’s “Ghost of Tom Joad,” and, more recently, Massive Attack’s “Teardrop.” But Jose Gonzalez has plenty of original material under his belt as well. 2003’s Veneer propelled this Swedish-born Argentine to

European fame, with tunes inspired from sources that range from eighties punk to Fela Kuti and Nina Simone.

He was, by the way, studying biochemistry to become a researcher at the University of Gothenburg. According to his web site, he applies the scientific method to his artistic process; he composes and records “patiently, methodically, and with great interest in finding new angles.” Now, Gonzalez is getting noticed internationally for his post-Sony-advertisement In Our Nature. At 29, he’s finally getting the attention he deserves.

José Gonzalez plays the Cabaret de Musée Juste Pour Rire (2111 St. Laurent) with Mia Doi Todd on March 14. Visit jose-gonzalez.com for more information.

– Caroline Zimmerman

For art’s sake Art matters. It’s a pretty obvious statement, but as many artists will attest, it’s not always so apparent

in practice. While established artists face an appreciable amount of difficulties having their art recognized in public, fine arts students often have an even harder time finding venues to express themselves.

Eight years ago, five Concordia students in the Fine Arts program took on a project in hopes of surmounting some of these challenges.

Thus, the unsubtly-named annual festival – Art Matters – was born.

This year’s instalment is celebrating student-made artwork in galleries, bars, and other venues across the city, such as Casa del Popolo, Art Mur, FOFA Gallery, Galerie Espace, Le Cagibi and many others. The closing party is on March 15, but in the meantime don’t forget to check out the range of multidisciplinary work by some of Montreal’s emerging artistic talents. Visit artmatters.concordia.ca for gallery listings and artist profiles.

– Claire Caldwell

And with spring has arrived the weary duty of making right what for months, untouchable, has festered –

And the question: Is it my job to write of another hard winter, or will silence serve the springtime better?

From some unknown bunker, the cat emerges and as if to answer, darts across the lawn.

– Meaghan Thurston

inkwell

Compendium!

The McGill Daily • Thursday, March 6, 2008

Lies, Half-truths, & Spaying and neutering your pets

19

Let my pupils go

SPAY THE DAILY? SSMU Executives take sides on the upcoming referendum Propaganda valve Mind&Body News Culture

EMMANUAL BARGERAT

Features Commentary Sci+Tech

Compendium

SSMU/Daily related humour Tail

Kay Turner, the only SSMU exec with the cajones to protect our ovaries.

“The biblical Israelites may have been high on a hallucinogenic plant when Moses brought the Ten Commandments down from Mount Sinai, according to a new study by an Israeli psychology professor.”

– Reuters, March 4, 2008.

you don’t shut your manna whole, Miriam.”

“And who is this Miriam?”

“Dude! You know Miriam, too?

Duuuuude.

“Let’s move on. Just how did you get to be in this desert leading a nation of people?”

“I’m sorry, sir, you were where?”

“Um…in the…um…desert.”

MAXWELL AULLINGER

NEWS ANALYSIS

C

ampus is aflutter with news about the Spay the Daily campaign. Members of the Yes Commitee include high-placed administration officials. But what’s really going on? According to Deputy Provost Student Life and Learning Mort Mendelson: “The Daily for me is very much an important part of student life at McGill. But we gots to fix its va-jayjay.” I decided to hit the phones and find out how your elected representatives feel about next week’s referendum.

Kay Turner VP Internal Presidential candidate MD: Hi Kay, it’s Drew. [Ed note: This was a lie.] I just wanted to get your comment on the “Spay the Daily” campaign. Do you think the Daily should be spayed?

Kay Turner: Should be what?

MD: Spayed.

KT: Spayed? I don’t – to be honest I don’t know what you mean by that.

MD: Spaying is like neutering but with female animals.

KT: Oh, like a cat.

Marcelle Kosman VP Clubs & Services McGill Daily: Hi, Marcelle, I just wanted to know how you felt about the Spay the Daily campaign.

Marcelle Kosman: The Spay The Daily campaign? You mean spay like the way I spayed my cat?

MD: Yeah, like the way you spayed your cat.

MK: I mean – not me personally, I took her to a veternarian.

Um, I haven’t read an issue of The Daily since I ran for SSMU. Every now and then I skim it for my name.

MD: Why would you want to remove reproductive organs from 20 people? Doesn’t that kind of reek of eugenics?

JI: I wouldn’t say from the people themselves, I think it’s from the paper.

MD: Jake [Ed note: The Bill to Kay’s Hillary] said he was in support of it.

KT: Really? Well, me and Jake don’t have the same views on everything. I know there are student execs that aren’t in favour of The Daily at all. The Daily hasn’t always been that impressed with me but having The Daily have full control over all its content is important.

MD: So do you support the campaign?

MK: Well, see the thing is. You spay a female cat, whereas you neuter a male cat. The reason you would spay a female cat is that a) you don’t want kittens and b) when your female cat goes into heat its really annoying because she’ll howl and meow for days and rub her, you know, posterior, against things and its really creepy. And you always have stray male cats around the area.

But also – this is something that most people don’t realize – when female cats are in heat and they menstruate it doesn’t actually come out of their bodies. It can stay inside so if you go a long time without getting your cat spayed she can get really sick becasue their bodies are meant to breed kittens: they’re not like human bodies. (Conspiratorially) You know what I mean.

[Ed. note Compendium sits in stunned silence.]

The reason why The Daily should be spayed is you don’t want all those male cats lingering outside the Shatner building pissing on things and fighting over The Daily and you don’t want The Daily to get sick from all that blood and ova hanging around inside collecting mould or whatever.

MD: So you conceive of The Daily as having a collective vagina?

JI: Um... I don’t know where it would go. But I guess so.

MD: And its reproductive organs?

KT: Um, What? I – what? What? I don’t know.

MD: That’s disgusting. Anything else?

MK: I just found a quarter on the ground.

Jake Itzkowitz President McGill Daily: Hi Jake. I’m helping news with some last minute stuff and I’m doing a piece on the Daily campaign.

Jake Itzkowitz: OK, shoot.

MD: Do you the think Daily should be spayed?

JI: Do I think I think it should be what?

MD: Spayed. Spay the Daily.

JI: Spayed?

MD: Do you think it should be spayed?

JI: Which one is male, which one is female?

MD: Spay is female, I think.

JI: Okay. Then, without any of the gender implications in that, yes.

MD: Why? JI: Well, you’ve already got The Daily and Le Délit, we don’t need any more of them running around.

MD: Yeah, exactly.

KT: Am I somehow affiliated with this campaign?

MD: Ah, no, it’s an administration thing.

KT: That’s ridiculous.

MD: I know. So could you clarify your position?

KT: I – I don’t think The Daily should be spayed. This is the first time I’ve heard about this. And I don’t think it’s something that should happen. It doesn’t seem appropriate that anyone would be running a campaign on that.

Where is the campaign?

MD: Uh, it’s a grassroots thing.

KT: Are there posters and stuff?

MD: Yeah, all over Shatner. I’m surprised you haven’t seen them.

KT: Oh. Oh. I see. Well, I have nothing to do with it. I have no idea this is going on.

“OK then, let me write that down – the desert. And just how long were you there, sir?”

“Like…a reeeaally long time, man.”

“If you had to guess.”

“Oh…I don’t know…like, maybe 40 years or something.”

“You were in the desert for 40 years.”

“Well…it would have been shorter if somebody had told us where to go. God…that guy, man…seriously. Y’know you think you know someone…like…really know him? Y’know?”

“Yes, I’m sure. And you were travelling through the desert alone, I take it?”

“I wish, man. I had an entire nation behind me. ‘Where are we going, Moses?’ ‘Are we in the promised land yet?’ I promise I’ll punch you right in the neck if

“Bad shit, man. Things with Pharaoh got reeeaally tense.”

“This ‘Pharaoh,’ he’s a friend? A family member?”

“That fucking guy, man. He was like a dad to me, man. A dad. But I saw right though his bullshit. ‘Moses, could you clean up your pyramid before dinner?’ Fuck that shit, man.

More like, ‘Hey Moses, why don’t you go ahead and make your own people into slaves?’ I don’t know, Pharaoh, why don’t you go ahead and drink rivers of blood while frogs, fleas, hail, plague, and locusts descend from the blackened skies, bringing incurable boils to your loins and death to all of your first-born sons, douche bag.”

“OK, how about we go back to something you said earlier. Now, this plant was on fire, but it wasn’t being consumed by the flame. How is that possible?”

“Yeah, man…I light one of those things up pretty much every day.

They actually last a lot longer than you’d…oh shit…the burning bush… umm…yeah…that totally happened too.”

Damien Plezmer / The McGill Daily

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