The McGill Tribune Vol. 26 Issue 20

LOVE'EM OR HATE'EM, ARCADE FIRE ROCKS MONTREAL, PAGE 14

AN UNEXPECTED VALENTINE'S DAY GIFT, PAGE 12

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P u b lis h e d b y th e S tu d e n ts 'S o c ie ty o f M cG ill U n iv e rs ity

V o lu m e 2 6 Issue 2 0 • F e b ru a ry 1 3 ,2 0 0 7

McGill's pockets lined with tar University retains investm ents in tobacco T raci J o h n s o n

McGill's $9 o o -m illio n en­ d o w m e n t m ay seem p altry in com p arison to th e U niversity o f Toronto's $2 .2 -b illio n purse, b u t th e tw o p o rtfo lio s have one th in g in c o m m o n : ro u g h ly th e same percentage o f th e ir to ta l invest­ m ents are in th e to b a c c o industry.

McGill ow ns $4 .5-m illio n in shares o f to b a c c o com panies R othm ans Inc. and A ltria G roup, Inc., b e tte r kn o w n as th e pare n t com p an y o f Philip M orris and th e m aker o f p o p u la r brands M arlboro, M erit and Virginia Slims.

The U niversity o f Toronto's inve stm e nts in th e sam e c o rp o ­ rations are th e targets o f a cam ­ paign m o u n te d by Education B ringing Youth Tobacco Truths, a cam pus advocacy g ro u p th a t is lo b b yin g th e u niversity to divest fro m to b a c c o com panies and has proposed a p o lic y a m e n d m e n t to p ro h ib it fu tu re in ve stm e n t in th e to b a c c o industry.

"U o f T is looked to as a m oral and ethical leader," said E-BUTT President Tyler Ward. "Investing in th e to b a c c o industry, w hose p ro d u cts kill 50 per c e n t o f lo n g ­ te rm users and harm s th e health o f countless others, does n o t u p ­ h old these h ig h standards."

In 2002 , th e Post-Graduate S tudents'S ociety passed a m o tio n d e n o u n c in g McGill's re te n tio n o f Philip M orris stock, calling fo r th e u niversity to divest its holdings, and Board o f G overnors m e m b e r Kappy Flanders criticized McGill fo r its investm ents in Big Tobacco.

"I d id speak o u t and I w o u ld again," Flanders said. "I d o n o t th in k th a t McGill should have in­

vestm ents in tobacco."

Associate Secretary-General Jennifer Towell said McGill does n o t have any plans to divest fro m R othm ans o r Altria and no one has filed a b rie f w ith th e C o m m itte e to Advise on M atters o f Social Re­ sponsibility, th e b o d y responsible fo r inve stig atin g ethical investing.

"Tobacco is o n ly one p a rt o f th e ir business,"Towell said, p o in t­ ing o u t th a t b o th Altria and Roth­ m ans o w n subsidiaries in o th e r industries.

CAMSR considers expres­ sions o f concern th a t id e n tify "so­ cial inju ry" caused by com panies and m ay m ake re com m e n da tio ns to divest to McGill's Board o f G ov­ ernors. McGill and th e U niversity o f T o ro nto e m p lo y th e same d e fi­ n itio n o f social in ju ry as Yale U ni­ versity, w h ic h has divested fro m th e to b a c c o in d u stry along w ith 25 o th e r N orth Am erican univer­ sities. A U niversity o f California at San Francisco stu d y revealed th a t internal d o c u m e n ts proved Philip M orris prom ised d on ation s and threa ten ed to pull research fu n d ­ ing in an a tte m p t to p reve nt Yale and o th e r universities fro m divest­ ing in th e 1990 s.

O utside m o n e y m angers handle th e d ay-to-da y decisions a b o u t McGill's investm ents, over­ seen by th e BoG Investm ent C om ­ m ittee. A cco rd ing to c o m m itte e Chair Ian Soutar, McGill is aware o f its social responsibilities b u t also tries n o t to m icrom anage its p o rt­ fo lio managers.

"W e've g o t to achieve g o o d returns and real g ro w th fo r o u r enSee TO BA CCO on p ag e 6

T e m p e rs fla re a s th e R e d m e n s q u a n d e r a tw o g o a l le a d in F rid a y n ig h t's c la s h at C o n c o rd ia 's Ed M e a g h e r A re n a . For fu ll c o v e r a g e o f th e C o r e y C u p g a m e , se e p a g e 1 7 . ____________

Principal stands for questions Adversarial students stay aw ay from event K a y v o n A fshari

Yesterday's to w n hall to o k a step in a n ew d ire ctio n w ith a diffe ren t fo rm a t in w h ic h Principal H eather M unroe-B lum focused on three broad them es: e nviro nm e nta l sustainability, m e eting s tu d e n t needs in a research-intensive university and fu n d in g fo r th e university. The principal first offered a b rie f talk on McGill's o p p o rtu n itie s and challenges, th e n to o k questions on th e three them es, before o p e n in g th e flo o r to free ques­ tions fro m audience mem bers.

M unroe-B lum said th a t th e n ew fo rm a t was m ore p ro ­ d uctive and unless peo ple express d is a p p o in tm e n t w ith it, it's here to stay.

"In term s o f hearing m ore diverse voices, this to w n hall was very good," she said. "There w ere a lo t o f g o o d questions and co m m e n ts and peo ple w eren't afraid to say w h a t th e y d id n 't like. Unless w e g e t a grou n dsw e ll o f feedback saying, 'W e hate it, g o back to th e o ld form at,' I th in k w e'll try it again."

In contrast, th e fall sem ester to w n hall, w h ic h to o k a less struc­

tured approach, saw a flu rry o f o p p o sitio n a l statem ents w hich M unroe-B lum a ckn ow led ge d d id n o t o pe n room fo r discus­ sion and m ade th e previous to w n h a irle s s productive."

Graem e Lamb, U 2 e n v iro n m e n t and co o rd in a to r o f Gorilla C om posting, probed th e principal on w h a t can be d o n e on cam pus to reduce energy use and p ro m o te m ore e ffic ie n t w aste m a na ge m en t as a w ay to "m itig ate costs." He fe lt th a t th e response indicated a positive step.

"The response I g o t was th a t McGill is in a p osition to learn fro m th e experiences o f o th e r in stitu tio n s w ith co m p o stin g and th a t th a t should be b ro u g h t u p w ith Associate Vice-Prin­ cipal Jim Nicell. This was w h a t I expected b u t it's still nice to have her say it," Lam b said.'This is th e first reported time... th a t som e on e as senior as th e principal has d ire ctly responded to a q uestion like c o m p o s tin g in a su p p o rtive way. It's n o t huge o r revolutionary, b u t it's a g o o d sign."

Lamb, w h o was present fo r b o th to w n halls this year, See STU D EN TS on p ag e 7

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Calls for tuition freeze hit boiling point Day of Action unites Canadian schools, pits students against adm in K ayvon A

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S tudent frustrations over th e cost o f post­ secondary edu ca tion as w ell as a p o te n tia l tu ­ itio n th a w in Q uebec reached th e ir clim ax last W ednesday, u n itin g students fro m across Cana­ da fo r th e Day o f Action. The e vent in M ontreal was aim ed at m aintain ing th e Q uebec tu itio n freeze as w ell as restoring federal transfers to provinces th a t w ere c u t in th e 1990 s.

"W e've been asking th e federal g o ve rn m e n t to reinvest e no ug h m o ne y to w here w e w ou ld be back at historic levels o f federal transfers for post-secondary education," said Students' Soci­

e ty President Aaron Donny-Clark, “w hich w o u ld be a b o u t $4 -9-b illio n in n ew fu n d in g in federal transfers to th e provinces, a b o u t $i. 25 -b illio n o f w h ic h w o u ld g o to Quebec."

O ne o f th e m ain them es o f th e Day o f Ac­ tio n , in w hich students d em onstrated in fro n t o f Premier Jean Charest's office on McGill College, centred on th e accessibility o f a university e d u ­ cation to io w -in co m e students. Principal Heather M unroe-B lum , w h o recently addressed th e Na­ tion al Assem bly calling fo ra liftin g o f th e tu itio n freeze, explained her position on accessibility in an in te rvie w w ith th e cam pus newspapers.

"One o f th e th in g s th a t w e can't afford

LEETIPTON S tu d e n ts g a th e r in fro n t o f P re m ie r C h a re s t's o ffice , r a is in g s ig n s to r e d u c e tu itio n .

to d a y ... is to make an offer th a t any qualified stu d en t w ill be able to com e to McGill, in d e ­ p e n d e n t o f th e ir financial means," M unroe-B lum said. "We d o n 't have e no ug h stu d en t aid e ith er supplied by th e g o v e rn m e n t o r w ith in th e uni­ versity to m e et th a t goal."

A ccording to th e Canadian Federation o f Students W eb site, p u b lic fu n d in g accounts for an a pproxim ate average o f 57 per c e n t o f univer­ sity and college o perating fun d in g , d o w n fro m 82 per c e n t 20 years ago.

M unroe-B lum has said th a t hig h er tu itio n should be used to im prove financial aid, specifi­ cally c o m m ittin g M c G illto p u t 30 per cen t o f any fee increase d irectly in to bursaries to increase accessibility.

However, SSMU Vice-President External Max Silverman fo u n d this to be a lo fty proposal, arguing th a t decreased g o v e rn m e n t fu n d in g for universities w ill result fro m tu itio n increases.

- "The prop o sition , as [M unroe-B lum ] pres­ ents it, sounds like a v e ry ju s t one and o ne th a t students w o u ld support, b u t th e y have no w ay to back this up and no w ay to prove th a t it is a feasible system," Silverman said. "In every single ju ris d ic tio n in th e w o rld w here tu itio n rates g o up, g o v e rn m e n t fu n d in g drops an equal or greater a m o u n t in a m a tte r o f years, in w hich case th e university ends up w ith no n ew m o ne y fo r infrastructure, Jet alone fo r bursaries o r fin a n ­ cial aid."

Silverman also said th a t he was impressed w ith th e stu d en t tu rn o u t fro m McGill.

“Looking back at th e stu d en t strike tw o years ago, w e o n ly had 50 o r so peo ple o u t at th e d em o nstra tio n on th e b ig g est day o f th e strike," he said. "Today, the re hasn't been all th a t

m uch b u ild u p fo r it in th e broader m edia, so I was b lo w n away to see 200 students there. To me, it shows th a t McGill students d o care a bo ut this issue and w ill com e on th e side o f th e tu ­ ition freeze."

O ne o f th e groups o f students th a t m ade its presence kno w n was th e Grassroots Association fo r S tud en t Power. W hile hold ing a large banner in s u p p o rt o f th e Day o f A ction, GRASPé spokes­ person Fred Burrill explained th a t th e g ro u p is pushing fo r m ore tha n ju s t th e m aintenance o f th e freeze.

"GRASPé's te n d e n c y is m ore tow ards th e p ro m o tio n o f th e to ta l a bo litio n o f tu itio n fees," Burrill said."However, we're here to d a y in solidar­ ity w ith all w h o are fig h tin g fo r accessible educa­ tion . We also believe in th e w o rth o f th e tu itio n freeze and th e fig h t fo r accessible education."

Silverman added th a t he is also in favour o f free tu itio n as an eventual goal to w o rk towards.

"I th in k th a t having th a t broad lon g -term vision is healthy fo r addressing th e short-term because it gives us a vision fo r w h a t we're w ork­ ing w ith now," he said.

Steven Rosenshein, CFS-Quebec national executive representative, explained that, al­ th o u g h th e Day o f A ctio n focused on th e freeze and increased g o v e rn m e n t fun d in g , free e d u ­ cation is a broader p art o f th e stu d e n t group's plan. "[The e lim ina tio n o f tu itio n fees] is gener­ ally o u r p la tform as w ell and that's w h a t we're w o rkin g tow ards in th e long run," Rosenshein said. “That is part o f o u r b ig g e r picture, b u t it is fair to say th a t th a t is n o t particularly th e mes­ sage today."

Jean Charest's office refused to c o m m e n t.*

EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW — ELIZABETH M A Y

May gets optimistic on her party's future Green Party leader wants recognition in debates and Canadian politics A

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Elizabeth May, current leader o f the Green Party, discusses her party's image, young people's involvement and the Kyoto Accord, showing that she and her party care about more than just the environment.

H o w d o y o u p la n o n e x p a n d in g th e G reen P arty's im a g e b e y o n d th a t o f e n v iro n ­ m e n ta lis m ?

I th in k th e single m o st im p o rta n t th in g is to be a p a rtic ip a n t in th e n e x t federal televised debates. Those d ebates cove r a range o f issues, n o ta b ly th e w ar in A fgh an ista n and th e Kyoto Accord, b u t it's really clear th a t th e issues and th e q ue stio ns fro m jo u rn a lis ts focus on m ore th a n a h a n d fu l o f issues. I th in k h o ld in g o u r o w n in th o se debates, e xp la in in g th e Green Party p la tfo rm and p a rtic ip a tin g in th o se d e ­ bates w ill m ake a m u ch larger d iffe ren ce tha n any o th e r o n e th in g th a t.w e can change.

L ib e ra l le a d e r S té p h a n e D io n m e n tio n e d th a t th e G reen P arty s h o u ld be a llo w e d to p a rtic ip a te in th e lea d er's d e b a te s . D o y o u see th is b e c o m in g a re ality?

W ell, w e c e rta in ly d o have s u p p o rt fro m m o st C anadians— c u rre n t p u b lic o p in io n polls say th a t 7 7 per c e n t o f C anadians w o u ld like to see th e Green Party in a leader's debate.

But th a t d oe sn 't m ean th a t it's a d o n e deal.

W e need th e m edia c o n s o rtiu m th a t makes th is d ecisio n to be very clear in th a t C anadi­ ans w a n t n o t o n ly to see us in th e d ebates b u t th e y w ill fin d it m o n u m e n ta lly u n fa ir if, in th e

end, w e are e xcluded. O f course, S téphane Di­ on's help is m u ch a p p re cia te d and I h o p e Jack Layton w ill cha ng e his m in d and d ecide he w ill also s u p p o rt m e b e in g inclu de d.

m o re s u p p o rte d by a c o lle c tio n o f bursaries and scholarships. So w e w a n t to ease th e d e b t b u rd e n and im p ro ve th e fin a n cia l s itu a tio n o f universities.

Is th e G reen p a rty th e n e x t y o u th p a rty ?

H o w w o u ld y o u a tte m p t to fu r th e r e n g a g e th e y o u th vote ?

W e d o have a n e w y o u th w in g called G e n era tion Green and it's really ta k in g o ff on cam puses and h ig h schools across' Canada.

The w a y th a t w e w a n t to have y o u n g p eo ple in vo lve d is by leaving th e o rg a n iz in g to y o u n g p e o p le them selves. We have y o u n g p eo ple represented in o u r ca m p a ig n c o o rd in a tin g c o m m itte e p la n n in g fo r th e n e x t federal elec­ tio n and w e have y o u n g p e o p le o rga n izin g even b efore th e y can v o te in h ig h school.

T h e G reen P arty d id v e ry w e ll in th e re c e n t b y -e le c tio n in L o n d o n N o rth C entre.

D o y o u see th is b e in g re fle c te d in th e w h o le c o u n try w h e n th e n e x t e le c tio n is called?

A bsolutely. In fact, Lon do n N o rth C entre w asn't a p a rtic u la rly Green rid ing . I d id n 't run th e re because it w as a place w e w ere likely to m ake a b re a kth ro u g h . I ran th e re because it w as o n e o f tw o rid in g s w h e re th e re w as a bye le c tio n w ith in m o n th s o f w h e n I was e le cted leader. Green had g o tte n five p er c e n t o f th e v o te and th is tim e , g o t 26 p er c e n t o f th e vote, it was a p re tty g o o d in d ic a tio n o f w h a t was g o in g to h ap pe n rig h t across Canada in th e n e xt federal e le c tio n ca m p a ig n w h e re Green w ill be e le cted to th e H ouse o f C o m m o n s and there's a lo t o f s u p p o rt fo r o u r party's p ositio n s on a w id e range o f issues.

W h a t is th e G reen P arty's p o s itio n o n p o s t-s e c o n d a ry e d u c a tio n a n d w h a t w o u ld th e G reen P arty d o if ele cte d ?

We a b s o lu te ly recognize th a t there's a crisis in p ost-secon d ary e d u ca tio n . N ot o n ly are stu d e n ts leaving u n ive rsity w ith an u na c­ c e p ta b ly large b u rd e n o f d e b t, b u t universities them selves are also s tru g g lin g to stay afloat, and these tw o issues are linked. So w e w ill in ­ crease fu n d in g to universities as w e ll as s h ift to m o re bursaries and w e w o u ld c o n tin u e th e M il­ le n n iu m S cholarship Fund. We a ctu a lly looked at th e idea o f th e Irish m o d e l o f free u niversity e d u ca tio n b u t c o n c lu d e d th a t, ironically, it was aga inst p o o r students, because free tu itio n is o n e th in g , b u t th e cost o f living, tra n s p o rta ­ tio n to u n ive rsity and purchase o f books are

H o w d o y o u a n d th e G reen P arty fee l a b o u t th e K yo to A c co rd a n d w h a t m o re w o u ld y o u do?

It's essential th a t K yoto rem ain in th e focus o f g o v e rn m e n t e ffo rts a t all levels. U n­ like th e H arper g o v e rn m e n t's approach, w h ic h is to d e n y th a t th e K yoto A cco rd m atters, th e Green Party sees it as a w a y to reach targets, w h ic h is u rg e n t. W e also w a n t to reinvest in o ur e c o n o m y to rem ain c o m p e titiv e and to have a lo w carbo n e co n o m y w ith a greater ene rg y p ro d u ctiv ity . All o f these in a system th a t can

s h o w th e resilience to w ith s ta n d th e shocks th a t c o m e fro m e c o n o m ic d is lo ca tio n o r fro m a c lim a te crisis e ve nt. O u r c u rre n t e ne rg y system is e xtre m e ly b rittle and can 't h a n dle shocks w ell, so th e re are a lo t o f reasons to clean th e air to ensure e c o n o m ic sustainability. W e have to m o ve to K yoto targe ts q u ite rapidly. ■

GREENPARTY.CA M a y s a y s t h a t free e d u c a tio n w o u ld a c t u a lly h u rt lo w -in c o m e s tu d e n ts , p re fe rrin g a s y s te m o f b u r s a rie s a n d s c h o la rs h ip s .

13.02.07 •The McGill Tribune •3

N E W S A N A L Y S IS

Is SSMU really bilingual?

Estranged relationship leaves francophones uninvolved V

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lth o u g h M cG ill is an English-speaking university, th e S tudents' S ociety defines itse lf as a b ilin g u a l esta blishm e nt. We all k n o w th a t SSMU is p ro fic ie n t in English, b u t h o w w ell d o th e y fu n c tio n in French?

"C onsidering th a t a q u a rte r o f M cG ill students are Francophone, to be able to really represent its s tu d e n t body, SSMU really needs to be bilingual," said Franco­ p h o n e C om m ission er D avid-M arc N ew m an.

A cco rd in g to th e Society's c o n s titu tio n , "M em bers o f th e S ociety m ay use e ith e r [English or French] at all m e eting s and in all d o c u m e n ta tio n o f Society."The use o f th e w o rd "m ay" has left m o st C ouncil d ocum e n ts, in ­ c lu d in g th e bylaw s and sections o f th e p o licy m anual solely in English.

"W e d o n o t cu rre n tly have th e resources to translate everything," said Vice-President U niversity Affairs Finn U pham . "W e d o translate as m any sections o f o u r W eb site as possible; w e d o translate o u r listserv. O ur bylaws need to be rew orked, e d ite d and u p d a te d anyway, so th e idea o f g o in g o u t, h iring som e on e fo r a sign ifica nt a m o u n t o f m o n e y to translate so m e th in g th a t w e'll be ch a n g in g in th e n ext year or tw o ends up n o t being practical."

A lth o u g h C ouncil d o c u m e n ts can be translated on d em and, n e ith e r U pham n or N ew m an c o u ld give an estim a te d tu rn a ro u n d tim e. In a d d itio n , N ew m an does n o t believe th a t having b ilin g u a l C ouncil d o c u m e n ts is a priority.

"I d o n 't th in k m any p eo ple ask fo r C ouncil d o c u ­ m ents to b eg in w ith , w h ic h is p ro b a b ly a general dis­ c o n n e c t w ith w h a t goes on in Council," he said. "People

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d o n 't g en erally com e and ask que stio ns in C ouncil or ask fo r C ouncil d o c u m e n ts anyway, e ith er in English or in French."

In a way, th e lack o f Francophone p a rtic ip a tio n in C ouncil m ay be g o o d new s fo r som e councillors. An em ail survey revealed th a t o u t o f th e n cou ncillors th a t responded, m o st are n o t bilingual. M any said th a t if th e y w ere asked, a q ue stio n in French d u rin g C ouncil, th e y w o u ld e ith e r respond in broken French o r in English.

Executives, w h o are m a nd ate d by th e c o n s titu tio n , to "acquire a fu n c tio n a l k n o w le d g e o f b o th official lan­ guages", are m ore p ro fic ie n t in th e French language than th e councillors. A lth o u g h n o t all e xecutive m em bers are fu lly b ilin gu a l, VP External Max Silverm an fe lt th a t cur­ rent executives are able to e ffe ctively p rovid e services fo r b o th A n g lo p h o n e and Francophone students.

"I th in k w e have th e a b ility to serve o u r students' needs," he said. "In th e p o rtfo lio s w he re w e d o n 't have b ilin g u a l executives, w e d o have s u p p o rt s ta ff in place w h o are b ilingual. S hould an issue arise, w e're to ta lly e q u ip p e d to take care o f it."

N ew m an im p lie d th a t th e lack o f French use in C ouncil is o n ly p a rtly d ue to th e vag ue c o n s titu tio n a l m andate.

"French is very rarely used, b u t that's because Fran­ cop ho ne s d o n 't g e t involved as m uch as th e y could," he said."SSMU can p ro b a b ly d o so m e th in g to im p ro ve that, b u t it's n o t im p osed to it either."

SSMU President A aron D onny-C lark agreed w ith N ew m an, saying th a t Francophone p a rtic ip a tio n in s tu ­ d e n t activities is "d is p ro p o rtio n a te ly low." He p o in te d to

th e fa c t th a t m any Francophone stu d en ts at M cG ill are fro m M o ntre al and have already established social n e t­ w orks before c o m in g to university.

The situ a tio n fo r o u t-o f-p ro v in c e o r inte rn atio na l Francophone students, w h o p ro b a b ly d p n o t have these social circles, is s lig h tly different.

"There's p ro b a b ly a b ig g e r chance th a t inte rn a ­ tio n a l Francophone students w o u ld g e t involved, b u t n o t necessarily in French," N ew m an said. “I th in k there's a b ig g e r need to create a c o m m u n ity fo r inte rn atio na l Francophones and o u t-o f-p ro v in c e Francophones."

To address th a t issue, SSMU has created a service called C entre des Étudiants Francophones, o u t o f th e ashes o f w h a t was fo rm e rly kno w n as th e Réseau des Francophiles.

CEF resource c o o rd in a to r S ophie Zh an g said th a t th e Réseau was to o o rie n te d to c lu b a c tiv ity and is n o w m ore like a resource cen tre w ith events on th e side.

"W e pub lish a p a m p h le t th a t o utline s Francophone stu d en ts' rights, lik e .h o w th e y can w rite essays, h o m e ­ w o rk and exam s in French, or b ring in English-French d iction a ries to th e ir exam," she said. "W e also tell th e m th a t th e y sho uld co m e to us w h e n e ve r th e y feel th e ir rights are violated."

Even w ith th e im p ro ve d CEF, Zhang still does n o t believe th a t she has th e answ er as to h o w to engage Francophone students.

"If w e can g e t th e answer, th a t'll be th e jackpot," she said. "M aybe it's because o f language barriers, o r o u r ac­ tivitie s are n o t g o o d , o r p e o p le have frie nd s o utside o f school; I d o n 't know." ■

CA M PU S

Booze infraction causes headache

“D ude!

C a n yo u turn your new spaper d o w n ? I’m t r y i n g to s t e e p . ”

Execs explore loopholes K a t e S p ir g e n

An alcohol infraction fro m Feb­ ruary 2004 at Gert's is causing som e legal issues fo r th e S tudents' Society.

The violations, w h ic h inclu de d a fly fo u n d in a b ottle, w ere b ro u g h t before a trib u n a l last w eek and a law th a t was n o t p reviously enforced m ay n o t a llow non-citizens or non-residents to sit on Council.

'The way [the board] interprets this is th a t starting in May or June, no one on council can be a non-citizen or non-resi­ dent," said Vice-President Finance and Operations Dave Sunstrum.

VP External Max Silverman stated th a t th e law is w rit­ ten to read tha t it "may enforce" th e law, b u t it is n o t necessary and the y are hoping it w ill n ot be imposed.

"We're h o p in g th a t th e y set th e prece de nt exce pting s tu d e n t unions fro m this," he said.

A cco rd ing to ch a p te r P 9 .1 , sec­ tio n 36 o f th e Q uebec Liquor Board laws, "To o b ta in a p erm it, a person m ust be o f fu ll age; if he is n o t a Ca­ nadian citizen, he m u st have been residing in Q uebec as a p e rm an en t resident w ith in th e m eaning o f th e Im m ig ra tio n A c t..."

"It's an o n g o in g issue and we're still in th e process o f d ealing w ith it legally," said President Aaron D onny-

Clark. "W e aren't really sure w h a t th e issue is rig h t now."

The im pending am algam ation o f the Students' Centre into SSMU is n ot helping the situation. W ith the merger, the alcohol perm it currently held by th e SCMU w ill becom e th e property o f SSMU. This creates a problem for non­ citizens sitting on Council.

"There w o u ld have been th e pos­ sibility o f keeping th e license under th e SCMU and saying th a t o n ly Cana­ dian citizens w o u ld have been able to sit on th e board o f th e SCMU," Silverm an said, "b u t w e can't d o th a t be­ cause it's u n c o n s titu tio n a l to say th a t you have to be a citizen in o rd e r to. participate."

But SSMU executives are o p tim is ­ tic a b o u t th e possible outcom es.

"We're g o in g to explore d iffe re n t avenues and exert p olitical pressure in c o u rt to see if w e can g e t this changed fo r stu d en t unions," S unstrum said. "It ju s t makes no sense. There are a lot o f stu d e n t unions th a t have inte rn atio na l students o n them ."

SSMU is also try in g to m ake o th er stu d e n t unions aware o f this law, as the re are m any in th e province o f Q uebec w ith inte rn atio na l students on th e ir C ouncil.

"This could affect adm inistration, b u t ifd o e sn 't have any effect on o u r de­ cision-making," Donny-Clark said. ■

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The McGill Tribune

4 •News • 13.02.07

@ MAC

Trudeau takes study break for Founder's Day Former PM's son gives speech, addressing but not impressing students E l iz a b e t h P e r l e

T h o u g h title d "Youth E ngagem ent in th e Environm ent,"Justin Trudeau's presentation as g uest speaker at th e M acdonald Cam-' pus Founder's Day cerem onies last Thursday focused little on th e relationship b etw e en s tu d e n t activism and im m e d ia te e nviro n ­ m ental concerns.

Instead, th e speech discussed th e necessity o f individu al ac­ tio n and stressed th e need fo r increased e nviro nm e nta l aware­ ness w ith in th e Canadian g o ve rn m e n t, as p art o f th e centennial celebrations.

Every year, Founder's Day at M acdonald Cam pus celebrates th e fo u n d in g o f th e college by Sir W illiam C hristopher M acdonald.

This year, th e celebrations w ere particularly n o te w o rth y as th e y m arked M a c'siooth anniversary Canada has been increasingly w re stlin g w ith enviro nm e nta l concerns and con sid e ring th a t M acdonald Cam pus is th e site o f McGill's fa c u lty o f a gricultural and e nviro nm e nta l sciences, it is no surprise th a t Trudeau, w h o is an active m e m b e r o f a p lethora o f e nviro nm e nta l program s, was chosen to speak at th e event.

Referencing David Suzuki, he articu late d th e concerns o f m ost e nviro nm e nta l activists on th e sub ject o f clim ate change, w h ile a tte m p tin g to address som e o f th e reasons b e h ind w h a t he called th e w orld's b la tan t in a ctio n in th e face o f hard, scientific and em pirical evidence.

"For an a w ful lon g tim e, th e expanse o f th e earth was huge; the re w ere all these n ew fro ntiers to discover," he said. "O ur e vo lu ­ tion , o u r value system and o u r instincts all d eveloped in what-was, fo r all inte nts and purposes, an in fin ite system."

This system, a ccording to Trudeau, is actually an e xceedingly fragile and closed biosphere, despite th e Canadian population's refusal to a ckn ow led ge it.

"You know, w e had a little b it o f w acky w e a th e r at Christmas, b u t that's n o th in g a little fake snow on th e w in d o w s w o n 't hide," he joked.

He also argued th a t m u ch o f th e p o p u la tio n still clings to mis­ g uid ed perceptions a b o u t Canada as a glo b al leader in e n v iro n ­ m ental initiatives.

"W e used to be a c o u n try th a t o th e r cou ntrie s looked to ...B u t w e've b ecom e th e c o u n try th a t doesn't really matter," Trudeau said. "The p rob lem is th a t m o st o f us still im a gin e th a t Canada still, m atters. W ell w e d on't. W e are b ein g passed. We are b eing replaced."

A cco rd ing to Trudeau, how ever, Canadians are also "h u n g ry fo r change" and as th e son o f a fo rm e r p rim e m inister, he m a in ­ tain ed th a t he understands a lo t a b o u t th e cou ntry's values.

"I was raised seeing, k n o w in g and und ersta nd ing th a t th e p o w e r o f this c o u n try is in its conscience," he said.

"You know , w e had a little bit o f w acky w e a th e r at Christmas, bu t that's n o th ­ ing a little fake snow on th e w indow s w o n 't hide."

— Justin Trudeau H owever, after Trudeau's presentation, m any stu d en ts re­ m ained unim pressed.

"His tone, first o f all, was condescending," said M arie-H élène W eech, U3 botanical sciences. "The speed at w h ic h he spoke was as if w e w ere kindergarten children. AH th e s e 'in d iv id u a l changes' w e're supposed to b ring around, I feel like here at Mac, w e make those changes every single day."

"I feel like he cou ld have co m e up w ith so m e th in g a b it m ore o riginal and creative,"said Valerie Francella, U2 e nv iro n m e n ­ tal sciences."He was preaching to th e choir."

A fter th e cerem ony, Trudeau to u c h e d on a subject he had sidestepped in his speech, b u t rem ained in th e back o f every­ one's m inds nevertheless: his obvious Liberal affiliations.

"R ight now , I am con sid e ring th e p ossibility o f g o in g in to politics," he a d m itte d . "I've been ta lkin g a g o o d gam e fo r five to MATTCAMPBELL ten years n o w on th e e n v iro n m e n t and m aybe I'm g e ttin g closer T r u d e a u s a y s th e w o rld h a s e x h ib ite d b la ta n t in a c tio n to a p o in t w he re I actually have so m e th in g to c o n trib u te to this w ith re g a rd to th e s c ie n c e b e h in d c lim a te c h a n g e . grand debate." ■

THE TRIBUNE WEB POLL W ill y o u b e fr e e z in g for t h e fre e ze o r h ik in g for th e h ik e ?

Other people can fight my battles for me

29%

S p r in g

E le c to r a l P e r io d

Freezing my ass off

32%

N O M IN A T IO N S A R E O P E N Elections McGill is now accepting nominations for the following positions

Poll is not scientificallyaccurate and represents only the opin­ ions of those who voted, not the entire McGill community.

Samplesize: 41

Mount Royal here I come!

S S M U V P

39%

V P

V P V P

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• • • • C

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This week's question: Do you believe that McGill's investm ents in tob acco are at odds with its ethical responsibilities to the academ ic community and society in general? Visit www.mcgilltribune.com to vote.

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Undergraduate Student Senators (for each faculty) Financial Ethics Research Commissioners Representative to the CKUT Board of Directors Representative to the Board of Governors

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Nominations kits and Student Initiated Referendum Kits are available online at www.electionsmcgill.ca or from our office in Shatner 405

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13.02.07 •News •5

www.mcgilltribune.com SPEA K ERS ON C A M PU S

N e w s B r ie fs

Cutting the Istan-bull Scholar to challenge denial of genocide Tom Q

u a il

G enocide has been at th e fo re fro n t o f th e new s re­ c e n tly and Taner Akcam's book, A Shameful Act: The Arme­ nian Genocide and the Question o f Turkish Responsibility, exposes th e author's view s on th e e ve nt that, according to him , saw th e forcib le rem oval, d e p o rta tin and slaughter o f ro u g h ly 1.5 m illio n Arm enians by th e Turkish p e o ple in 1915.

W hat he claim s to be th e firs t g e n o cid e o f th e tw e n ­ tie th c e n tu ry con tinu es to rip at th e social fab ric and pluralism w ith in m o de rn Turkey. It has been likened to th e H olocaust, b u t Akcam says th e d iffe rin g fa c to r is the a cc o u n ta b ility o f tho se involved in th e genocide. Turkey has n o t accepted blam e fo r th e A rm enian G enocide and som e Turkish scholars are standing up and calling fo r th e Turkish g o v e rn m e n t to redeem th e past th ro u g h historical justice.

Akcam, an e th n ic Turk, was im p rison ed in 1976 for colla bo ra tin g on a s tu d e n t jo u rn a l in Ankara. He escaped to Germ any, w he re he becam e an A m n esty International p olitical prisoner o f conscience and c o m p le te d his s tu d ­ ies. He has c o m m itte d m u ch o f his academ ic ene rg y to addressing th e g enocide, p u b lish in g tw o com prehensive pieces o f literature on th e topic.

The e vent is hosted by th e C entre fo r H um an Rights and Legal Pluralism and presented by th e Zoryan Institute and th e A rm enian S tud en t A ssociation o f McGill. The Cen­ tre, a ttached to th e fa c u lty o f law, is involved w ith inte r­ disciplinary research in hum an rights law and feels th a t Akcam's b oo k is th e m ost com prehensive w ith in avail­ able literature. Law Professor Frédéric M é gret believes this e ve nt to be o f great significance.

"W hat's im p o rta n t is th a t it is c o m in g fro m w ith in /' M é gret said. "It's no lo n g e r sim p ly A rm enian intellectuals or th e International c o m m u n ity . It's n o t hum a n rights or NGOs, it's n o t U.S. scholars. It's c o m in g fro m peo ple w h o are p art o f the T u rkish establishm ent."

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W ith an increased global interest in hum an rights and th e European Union's decision on Turkey's poten tial accession, Turkey m ig h t be forced to deal w ith these calls fo r re cog nition , despite an a m e n d m e n t to th e penal code tw o years ago and h o stility b e tw e e n th e T u rk ish g o v e rn ­ m e n t and these scholars.

In 2005 , the T u rkish g o v e rn m e n t im p le m e n te d a new article in to its penal cod e kno w n as "Insulting Turkishness." A rticle 301 has n o w placed m any o f these outspo ke n scholars, in c lu d in g novelist and N obel Laureate O rham Pamuk and Akcam , u n d e r investigation.

"These e m in e n t Turks w o u ld argue th a t th e great-

"These eminent Turks would argue that the greatest insult to 'Turkishness' is the continuing denial of this historical tragedy which brutally ripped Turkey's multiethnic fibre apart."

— Dr. Payam Akhavan Former UN War Crimes Prosecutor est insu lt to 'Turkishness' is th e c o n tin u in g denial o f this historical tra g e d y w h ic h b ruta lly ripped Turkey's m u ltie th ­ nic fib re apart," said Dr. Payam Akhavan, a fo rm e r UN W ar Crim es Prosecutor and McGill professor o f inte rn atio na l law.

"The e ve nt is b eing held because re cog nition o f th e 1915 A rm enian g e n o c id e is a m a tte r o f considerable h is­ torica l and m oral im portance," Akhavan said."Professor Ak­ cam's b o o k is o ne o f th e m o st sign ifica nt scholarly w orks on th e subject." ■ Akcam will be speaking in the M oot Court in the Chan­ cellor Day Law building on Feb. r6 a t 5:00 p.m. More informa­ tion can be found through the Centre for Human Rights and Legal Pluralism a t hrw g.m cgill.ca.

This ju s t in: m u m m ie s d o n 't ro am M cG ill cam p us!

This past Thursday, students failed to be shocked and aw ed as a large m o b o f m u m m ifie d students d id n 't run th ro u g h cam pus, as was p lanned by th e M ontreal Flash M o b Foundation.

The fo u n d a tio n was recently created by Nik Sipolins, Ui cultural studies, th ro u g h Facebook and o pe ne d to all students in M ontreal. Flash m obs involve m any peo ple assem bling in a certain place, d o in g so m e th in g unusual and th e n q u ickly dissipating. A relatively n ew p h e n o m e n o n , th e idea o f a flash m o b e m erged in 2003 and has gained p o p u la rity since.

"A p olitical m ove can com e o u t o f [a flash m o b] b u t it can be playful as w ell and be ju s t fo r fun," Sipolins said.

The g ro u p had planned to drape participa nts in to ile t paper and run as m u m m ies th ro u g h cam pus. U nfortunately, a ccording to Sipolins, less th a n th e 50 required show ed up and th e e ve nt was cancelled.

Som e w ere d isa pp oin ted to learn tha t, d espite th e o nlin e hype surround­ ing th e event, it never cam e to fru itio n .

"I was g o in g to g o w atch. I th o u g h t w a tc h in g w o u ld be m ore fun, b u t th e n no one show ed up and I fe lt bad,"said M ichael G arfinkle, U 2 chem istry.

O thers rem ain a lo o f to th e o d d concept.

"I d id n 't even k n o w w h a t a flash m o b was u n til now,"said Estelle Hjertaas, U3 politica l science and history.

The events are q u ite p o p u la r th ro u g h o u t Canada and th e w o rld and have even been featured in a CSI M iam i episode. However, th e y have ye t to b ecom e p o p u la r on campus.

Sipolins believes th a t an idea w ith broader appeal w ill a ttra c t students.

"I w a n t o th e r p eo ple to v o lu n te e r in an organizational capacity to ... make th e ir o w n events and change th e recent news."

W ith ideas already circula ting fo r th e n ext event, students can fin d th e in fo rm a tio n on th e Facebook g ro u p fo r th e M ontreal Flash M o b Foundation.

— Alii Madsaac C on -m a n c a u g h t o n ca m p u s A trail o f victim s and an a no nym o us tip has led to th e arrest o f a con-m an at McGill. Police have y e t to release th e tru e id e n tity o f th e m an, w h o w e n t u n d e r th e false names Garret W ilson and Dr. Bailey Garret Bernstein.

"At tim es he w o u ld say he was a d o c tp r o r em plo ye e n eeding cab fare," said McGill Security Services Assistant M anager Pierre Barbarie. "He used vari­ ous types o f stories regarding his needs. He w as-very co n vin cin g w ith th e sto­ ries he was g ivin g various individuals around campus."

The m an approached p eo ple to loan him th e a pp ro xim a te fare for a taxi, and prom ised th e m re im b u rse m e n t by w ritin g th e m a cheque. W hen unsus­ p e c tin g victim s trie d to cash th e cheque, th e y realized th e y had been duped.

"The a m o u n t o f m o n e y he cons fo r is m inim al," Barbarie said. "It's no sign ifi­ can t a m o u n t o f dollars a t one tim e fro m o ne person."

A cco rd ing to C onstable Patterson o f th e M ontreal Police Service, th e conm an m ade o ff w ith tho usa nd s o f dollars over th e last m o nth.

The p olicem an said th a t th e con-m an appealed to people's sym pathy, saying th a t he w as ju s t a m an in a tig h t spo t th a t needed a little help from p e o p le on cam pus.

Both police and McGill security reports have co n clu d e d th a t b etw e en 10 and 20 peo ple have been victim s o f these cons, a m o n g st the m , som e facu lty m em bers and w orkers in McGill H ealth Services. Barbarie, however, said he be­ lieved th a t there are m any m ore cases w he re p e o ple d id n 't realize th e y w ere conned.

A fter a sigh tin g in th e Brown B uilding last W ednesday, a security services a g e n t proceeded to chase after th e m an on fo o t o n to a bus. Police m ade th e sub seq ue nt arrest. McGill Security believes th a t th e con man's targets w ere prim arily in th e Brown and Bronfm an Buildings. . — Ken Sun

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6 •News • 13.02.07

The McGill Tribune

Tobacco shares benefit university's pocketbook

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Beauty is said to be in th e eye o f th e beholder, b u t w h ile drinking, bea uty is in th e eye o f th e beerholder. Scientists be­ lieve th e y m ay have created a fo rm u la th a t can explain th e "beer goggles" effect, w h ic h is th a t p h e n o m e n o n w he re th a t "h o t g irl"y o u to o k h om e last n ig h t at th e bar turns o u t to be a to ta l dog. The fo rm u la takes in to consideration th e a m o u n t o f a lcohol consum ed, th e lig h t in th e bar and th e a m o u n t o f sm oke in th e air. • There m ay be a replacem ent fo r th e re­ c e n tly deceased C rocodile Hunter. A 66-year-old Brazilian man pried his grandson fro m th e g rip o f an 8 o-p o u n d A naconda last Friday by w re stlin g it, h ittin g it w ith stones and fina lly at­ tacking it w ith a m achete. The m an e ventually killed th e snake b u t n o t before it b it him in th e chest requiring 21 stitches at th e hospital. • Peyton M anning w ill soon be kn o w n as th e C hicago Bears' m o st avid fan. N o t th e quarterback, b u t th e Il­ linois m an w h o lost a Super Bowl b e t w h e n th e Colts beat th e Bears 29 to 17 . S cott Wiese n o w has to advertise th e nam e change in a local new spaper and legally change his nam e to th a t o f th e C olts'fa m ou s quarterback. • D on 't w a n t to b ury Fluffy in th e local p et cem etery? N ow you can tu rn him in to a d ia m o n d rin g and take h im w ith you everyw here. A UK w o m a n d id ju s t th a t w ith th e ashes o f Lucky, her sheepdog, her g old en retriever, Sam, and Patch, her to m ca t. "M y anim als m e an t th e w o rld to m e and even th o u g h th e y are g on e th e y are still w ith me,"she said.

Disagreem ent arises over ethical marketing "Protesting these investm ents is consistent fro m a m edical student's d o w m e n t, and w e also understand th e perspective," he said. "The Canadian need to be socially responsible," said M edical A ssociation has spoken o u t Soutar, w h o is also th e CAMSR. Chair. and divested its h old ing s in tobacco."

"I am a p o rtfo lio m anager m yself and For an u nd er fu n d e d univer­ I d o n 't invest in cigarette c o m p a ­ sity like McGill, o w n in g stock in nies because I d o n 't believe they're th e to b a c c o in d u stry generates great g ro w th businesses. However, needed resources. Altrra's profits o th e r peo ple th in k the y're p retty have been bolstered by cigarette g o o d stocks to invest in." price increases and m ore overseas M a n a g e m e n t professor Ed­ sales; th e co m p a n y earned $2 .96 w ard Aronson said he doesn't see b illio n in th e fiscal fo u rth q ua rte r a p rob lem w ith h o ld in g stock in o f 2006 alone.The c o m b in a tio n o f to b a c c o com panies if the re isn't a b u rg e o n in g p op ula tio ns and less b e tte r in ve stm e n t o p tio n . s trin g e n t advertising m ake th e "M cG ill d e fin ite ly needs th e d e ve lo p in g w o rld an ideal m ar­ money," he said. "If it's an equal ket fo r to b a cco com panies. The a m o u n t th a t th e y can g e t by in ­ o pe ra tin g inco m e o f Altria's Philip vesting elsewhere, th e n I w o u ld M orris USA rose 4.2 per ce n t in th e shy aw ay fro m investing, b u t fo u rth quarter, w h ile th e o pe ra t­ m aybe th e y can't." ing inco m e o f Philip M orris Inter­ Aronson, w h o specializes in national rose by 46.5 per cent. ethics and leadership, said e th i­ A ronson said he understands cal decision-m aking d epends on w h y McGill is invested in Big To­ three variables: w h a t is m o tiv a tin g bacco and explained th a t th e th e decision, its possible conse­ u niversity sho uld take co m p a n y quences and th e situation. beh aviou r in to a cc o u n t w h e n "I th in k McGill's m o tiv a tio n is e valuating its investm ents. th a t th e y w a n t to m ake th e u n i­ "It's all in th e c o m p a n ie s 'c u r­ LINDABOURENANNI re nt behaviour," he said. "If they're versity better," he said. "However, if [Altria and R othm ans] are m arket­ H a s g a r a lly S a lm a a n , U 3 b io c h e m is tr y , a ctin g unethically, th e n w e should ing to m inors, th e n it is a reason to e n jo y s th e e n d re su lt o f o n e o f M cG ill's consider n o t investing." ■ C o n tin u e d fro m C O V E R

p

n o t invest."

M cG ill International H ealth Ini­ tia tive m e m b e r M a rtin S m oragiew icz said he w o u ld s u p p o rt dive stin g th e university's hold ing s in Altria and Roth­ mans.

Sources: BBC.com, CNN.com, news.yahoo.com, ABC.com

C la r ific a tio n :

The Jan. 30 issue o f th e Tribune ran an a rticle o n SHOUT, STAND and th e CFJS conference.These organizations are n o t involved or af filiated w ith th e CFJS Iran p e titio n cam p aig n in any w ay; th e y sim ply a tte n d e d th e conference held by CFJS.

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BY THE NUMBERS McGill's investm ents help ensure a secure financial future for the university. However, some investm ents may have destructive consequnces for C anadians'health. This breakdown m ight help you decide what's m ore im portant:

7 5 p e r c e n t o f A ltria's p ro fits c o m e fro m to b a c c o 4 7 ,0 0 0 C a n a d ia n s d ie fro m s m o k in g c ig a re tte s a n n u a lly 3 ,0 0 0 ,0 0 0 C a n a d ia n s are p re s e n tly a liv e th a t c ig a re tte s w ill kill $ 4 ,5 0 0 ,0 0 0 M cG ill has in v e s te d in to b a c c o c o m p a n ie s

Students disagree over usefulness GRASPé takes issue with principal's approach

Sources: Health Canada, Altria Croup, Inc. Annual Report C o n tin u e d fro m C O V E R

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ide n tifie d th e absence o f th e Grass­ roots Association fo r S tud en t Power as a factor th a t gave yesterday's m e e tin g a diffe ren t nature tha n last semester's.

"GRASPé w asn't here and it was m uch less adversarial th a n last time," Lam b said: "I w o u ld n 't say th a t th e last to w n hall was u np ro du ctive, b u t I th in k th a t students asking questions at th e last to w n hall, generally speak­ ing, had diffe ren t objectives .than th e students th a t w ere asking questions here today."

GRASPé spokesperson Fred Burrill agreed th a t th e group's n o n a tte n ­ dance created a "m arked difference” in yesterday's to w n hall, however, he asserted th a t it is th e fo ru m itse lf th a t is th e problem , n o t student's o pp osi­ tion al questions.

"W hen w e w ere the re [for th e fall to w n hall], th e y w ere show n to be th e farce th a t th e y are in term s o f p ro m o t­ ing open discussion and dem ocracy on campus," he said. "[M unroe-B lum ] can basically do w ha te ver she w ants because she's set up th a t fo ru m and everyone else can ju s t com e to it and operate w ith in th e confines th a t she's d ictated. We w eren 't a tte n d in g th e to w n hall o u t o f any hopes o f it being fun ctio na l, b u t rather d em o nstra tin g th e fa ct th a t it is a filth y endeavor. I w o u ld n 't consider g o in g to th e to w n hall and asking questions to som eone w h o doesn't care as being a p ro d u c ­ tive th in g to do."

Arts Senator Jake Itzkow itz was present fo r th e to w n hall and fe lt th a t th e n e w fo rm a t was a response to th e previous to w n hall, w h ic h he said "GRASPé ruined."

"It w o u ld have been m uch b e tte r if [M unroe-B lum ] had n o t fe lt forced to

take a defensive posture based on th e actions o f th e last to w n hall," Itzkow itz said. "[The n ew form at] was m eant to co n tro l th e e n v iro n m e n t so th a t any actions th a t [M unroe-B lum ] fe lt w ere less th a n con du cive to debate w o u ld be n ip p ed in th e bud."

It was n o t o nly students asking questions b u t facu lty and sta ff as well.

Civil e ngineering professor Saeed Mirza suggested th a t th e adm inistra­ tio n take steps tow ards e nacting 'lifecycle cost' considerations fo r b u ild ­ ing m aintenance, w he re by planning w o u ld take th e costs o f th e "total life o f a b u ild in g " in to account.

"I th in k [M unroe-B lum ] has taken n ote o f w h a t I said and I th in k th a t it's fo r b o th o f us to pursue further. I have su b m itte d a note to th e principal to help her prepare for this meeting," Mirza said. "W hat w e need to d o is sit d o w n w ith th e adm inistrators and som e o f th e experts and explain to th e m w h a t life cycle costing is."

M unroe-B lum said th a t th e new fo rm a t was n o t m eant to p re e m p t o r preclude th e types o f questions posed at th e last to w n hall, w h ic h she ide n tifie d as o ppositional, b u t rather was in te n d e d to facilitate discussion: "We chose them es th a t w o u ld a llo w people to make representation and a llo w all voices to be heard and w e w o u ld encourage a range o f qüestio n s f she said.

The to w n hall's structure, h o w ­ ever, allow ed e no ug h tim e fo r tw o questions to be asked d u rin g th e free question period.

M unroe-B lum fe lt th a t this was ju s t a result o f th e lim ite d tim e avail­ able.

"W e cou ld always use m ore [tim e], I th in k th e lunch h ou r slot w orke d w ell, b u t you cou ld see th a t people had 1:30 com m itm ents." ■

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n? M c G ill

O p in io n

THE HELPLESS ROMANTIC

PARRY & THRUST

Hey, someone save the environm ent!

Tobacco or not tobacco K ayvon A

fs h a r i a n d

K ayvon g ets g o in g : I'm a b ig fan o f m axim izing p ro fit fo r personal gain, especially at th e expense o f morals. However, I also believe th a t individuals and in stitu tio n s should practice w h a t th e y preach.

As it stands, McGill has failed to reconcile th e fact th a t it is invested in b ig to b a c c o w h ile it also w orks to d evelo p cures fo r diseases caused by its tarry con sum e r p roduct.

Clearly, p a rt o f a firm 's capacity fo r g ro w th is - based on its a b ility to a ttra c t inve stm e nt and w ith th e m o ne y McGill shelled o u t to th e A ltria Group, th e pare n t o f Phillip Morris, th is u niversity is g u ilty o f a iding and a b e ttin g an in d u stry th a t has an u gly past as w ell as a socially d estructive present.

Forget a b o u t th e days o f Joe Camel and M e n th o l Moose, today's m arketers and advertis­ ers have fo u n d an ironic n e w vehicle fo r w in n in g over th e you th: anf/'-sm oking ads. A cco rd ing to the American Journal o f Public Health, ads aim ed at parents to convince th e ir kids n o t to sm oke are actually cou n te rp ro d u ctive . That is to say, th e re­ bellious, e m o teens w h o are exposed to these ads are more likely to sm oke th a n others.

Your response, Mr. Smith?

A d a m lig h ts o n e u p a n d replies: Tobacco is bad s tu ff and cigarettes are particularly nasty, b u t th e last tim e I checked, it was still legal to sm oke and to sell tob acco products.

The to b a c c o in d u stry does have a check­ ered past as far as m arketing to m inors goes, b u t tho se com panies paid b illions o f dollars several years ago to settle th a t litiga tio n. As fo r th e a n ti­ sm oking ads, you can blam e health regulators fo r those: th e y w ere forced on th e ciga re tte c o m p a ­ nies d u rin g th e settlem ents. Big to b a c c o is ju s t d o in g w h a t it was to ld ; it's n o t Altria's o r Im perial Tobacco's fa u lt th a t g o v e rn m e n t bureaucrats are to o d im -w itte d to realize th a t kids te n d to d o th e o p p o site o f w h a t th e ir parents te ll them .

M ore im p o rta n tly, McGill holds Altria shares fo r a reason: th e Inve stm e nt C o m m itte e decided th a t A ltria w as th e best place to invest th a t m oney.

If m aking g o o d m o n e y fro m to b a c c o shares helps us to ensure a secure financial fu tu re fo r th e u n i­ versity, w hat's w ro n g w ith that?

A

dam

R ic h a r d T seng RICHTSEN@GMAIL.COM

S m it h

K ayvon insists he b u tt o u t a n d vo lle ys back: Kudos to you, sir, fo r a ckn o w le d g in g th e d im -w it­ te d ness o f every single g o v e rn m e n t bureaucrat w ith o u t exception. However, if th e industry's b ig ­ gest com pany, re no w ne d fo r its m arketing savvy, really w a n te d to c u t o ff underage recruits to its d e a th -d ea ling products, it c o u ld surely m o u n t a m ore e ffective cam paign to d o so.

As to a secure financial fu tu re fo r th e universi­ ty, th e in ve stm e n t com m itte e's decision to invest in A ltria says a bsolutely n o th in g a b o u t th e fact th a t there exists a sharp co n tra d ic tio n b etw e en o u r internal goals and th e external e ffe ct th a t w e have on broader society. A nd to th e e xte n t th a t there are o th e r inve stm e nt o p tio n s th a t can offer sim ilar rates o f return, McGill should begin th e d i­ v e s tm e n t o f all its shares in to b a cco firms.

Perhaps th e m o ne y th a t ciga re tte -in du ce d lun g cancer drains fro m p u b licly -fu n d e d health care cou ld be spe nt on so m e th in g m ore useful— say, a secure financial fu tu re fo r post-secondary education?

A d a m b lo w s sm oke rin g s a n d fin ish e s: The p ro b ­ lem is th a t th e a nti-sm o kin g ads aim ed at parents w ere too effective. The ones aim ed at kids have a ctually been q u ite e ffective at reducing te e n a g ­ e rs'te n d e n cy to smoke.

Your idea a b o u t c o n tra d ic tio n seems valid on th e surface, b u t th in k a b o u t it a little more. If McGill sells its A ltria shares, som eone else w ill b uy th e m . Rather th a n have th e m be o w n e d by som e­ one w h o was ju s t loo king to make a buck or tw o , w h y n o t h old th e m and p u t th e inco m e fro m th e fa t d ivid en ds tow ards cancer research? It w o u ld be nicely ironic to have a to b a cco com pany's p ro f­ its used to c o m b a t th e ills caused by its products.

As fo r securing th e university's financial fu ­ ture, th e best w ay to d o th a t is n o t to rely on p o ­ ten tial g o v e rn m e n t fu n d in g b u t to invest McGill's e n d o w m e n t m o ne y as w ell as possible, in this case in Altria shares. ■ Adam Smith and Kayvon Afshari are Tribune ed­ itors. Kayvon is a noble, Puritan crusader and Adam is a soulless capitalist. Adam doesn't really smoke.

D

id you hear that? The D oom sday C lock has ju s t ticke d tw o m ore m inutes closer m id n ig h t and for o nce it isn't ju s t a b o u t superpow ers, m ad rocket scientists or rogue generalissim os th re a te n in g to launch nukes; this tim e it's all o f us. The A to m ic Scientists, w h o run th e g ia n t clock at th e U niversity o f Chicago, have taken clim ate change in to a cc o u n t in th e ir w arnin gs a b o u t th e end o f th e w orld . I d o n 't k n o w a b o u t anyone else, b u t this puts m e on full alert.

The first th in g I d id w as tu rn o ff th e lig h t th a t m y e nviro n m e n ta list ro o m ­ m ate had le ft on in her absence. I the n sw itche d o ff th e TV, w h ic h was sho w in g infom ercials to an e m p ty room . N ext 1 p roceeded to th e kitchen, w he re o ur very o w n landfill o f d irty plastic c o n ta in ­ ers, bones and g rim y pizza boxes was slow ly p ilin g o u t o f th e blue box. Telling m yself th a t I had already taken th e first steps in th a t 1,000 m ile jo u rn e y away fro m g lo b al w arm ing , I w e n t back to m y room . Besides, I'm p re tty sure th a t I saw algae g ro w in g b e tw e e n th e bones and th e box, so I w o u ld have been destroying an ecosystem had I rem oved it.

H ow does one ju s tify one fo rm o f w aste com p ared to another? M any o f m y friends claim to be e n viro n m e n ta lly conscious; lots o f th e m w ill lecture you, if p ro m p te d , a b o u t recycling, takin g p u b ­ lic tra nsit o r b o y c o ttin g evil corpo ra te brand X, Y o r Z, b u t a t th e same tim e, every single o ne o f th e m has th e ir little un-green vices. O w n a cou ple o f dogs?

Think o f th e trucks spe w in g noxious fum e s over m iles o f land o r th e rising sm og fro m smokestacks a t th e canning fa c to ry every day ju s t so C lifford can g o rg e h im se lf on P uppy Chow. Sm oke w eed? It takes a huge a m o u n t o f elec­ tric ity to grow , makes CO 2 w h e n burned and uses fossil fuels to sm ug gle (the

trucks again). G oing skiing? I shudder to th in k o f h o w big an ecological fo o tp rin t th e cha let alone has alone.

If th a t w asn't bad eno ug h, m any o f m y con serva tio nist cronies are con­ sciously m aking bad energy-saving d eci­ sions! There's th e recycler w h o drives an SUV, th e cyclist w h o th ro w s used b a tte r­ ies o u t th e w in d o w and th e vegan w h o does both. It doesn't loo k like a nybo dy is actually practicing all th a t th e y preach and I haven't m e t a single person w h o has a ctually low ered th e ir con s u m p tio n by 30 per cent.

Moreover, even if Kyoto w ere met, w e m ig h t c u t d o w n on w o rld emissions by less tha n one per c e n t at th e cost o f up to 15 per c e n t o f GDP. By the n, you w o u ld n 't be conserving energy because you w a n te d to, b u t because it was unaf­ fordable. In fact, if w e w ere to h alt p ro ­ d u c tio n o f all greenhouse gases to m o r­ row, there's no in d ica tio n th a t th e last generation's energy habits haven't al­ ready pushed us over th e edge and we're o n ly delaying th e inevitable. M aybe a rise in te m p e ra tu re w o u ld n 't be all th a t bad fo r Canada— I'm th in k in g selfishly in an unh ea te d room here in th e m id st o f a typ ical M ontreal W inter.

Given all o f these depressing facts, it becom es very d iffic u lt fo r m e to even bother. In th e last 10 years, e nv iro n m e n ­ talists have b ecom e th e m ost listened-to ethicists, p ro n o u n cin g th e end o f th e w o rld and th e ways w e o u g h t to act until then. W hereas religions and ideologies o ffe r a b e tte r future, e nvironm entalists ask us to sacrifice n o t to save th e earth, b u t to stall its destruction . No m a tte r w h a t w e do, th e earth's health w ill c o n tin u e to deteriorate. Let's h o p e th a t som eone can provide, if n o t a w ay to tu rn back tim e, at least som e w ay to m ake this lo n g -te rm ene rg y saving pay off. ■

WET PAINT

Redecorating? No, just getting off!

D o m in iq u e Z ipper DOMINIQUEZIPPER@GMAIL.COM

R

ecently, I had th e pleasure o f e njo yin g great conver­ sation, great fo o d and great sex toys. T h ou gh I m ust a dm it, I can't a ttest to th e greatness o f th a t last item , as I've y e t to give th e toys a go. However, I can say th a t th e Geisha cream passed arou n d at th e party, designed to cre­ ate a tin g lin g sensation in y o u r tin g lie s t region, d id serve to elevate m y e n jo ym e n t o f th e g o u rm e t cheesecake also being passed around.

Yes, w e are ta lk in g a b o u t a sex to y party. I'm sure you've heard o f th e o ld e r version if you can re m e m be r y o u r m o m exclaim ing, 'O h honey, d o n 't to u c h that face cream! It's fro m th e A von lady!" and you w alked aw ay in b e w ild e rm e n t at w h o this m ysterious w o m a n w ith her bag o f tricks was.

It seems th a t th e d om e stic salesw om an g o t w ise and ta p p e d in to w h a t her clients really w ant: som e g o o d tricks.

A nd tricks the re were; in lig h t o f th e w ell n ig h Vagina Mono­ logues and th e q u e s tio n ,'If y o u r vagina cou ld talk, w h a t w o u ld it say?" I was le ft w ith th e im pression th a t som e o f these toys w o u ld leave it u tte rly speechless.

Great toys and in -d e p th conversations a b o u t s tim ula tio n aside, th e p a rty left m e w o n d e rin g h o w such an e ve nt w o u ld

translate in to th e m ale realm. The w o m a n p resenting th e toys passed arou n d a sillicone fake vagina fo r guys. It basically resem bled a p uffed up d ild o w ith a ribbed hole in th e m id d le and sim ulations o f a d it and labia on th e outside. S om eone suggested p u ttin g w a rm in g lube on th e inside to m ake it feel m ore real. To be honest, it kind o f grossed m e out.

The idea o f a g u y using it con jured im ages and feelings associated w ith a certain ty p e o f m ale sexuality vergin g on obsessive. This is a bsolutely ridiculous, seeing as it makes no d ifference w h e th e r you're p u ttin g silicone in or over yourself and it has absolu tely no bearing on y o u r sexual m entality.

But fo r som e reason th e th in g m ade m e u n c o m fo rta b le and ju d g m e n ta lly , I th o u g h t to m yself,"O nly a g u y w h o really can't g e t laid w o u ld use this and anyway, you've g o t a hand!"

Yet so d o I! W hat a sham eful d o u b le standard! It b o th ­ ers m e th a t I can th in k o f girls g e ttin g o ff w ith devices th a t have m ore fu n c tio n s tha n a C uisinart as sexually liberated and y e t I regard a g u y lu b in g u p a fake vagina w ith u tte r dis­ dain. A nd h o w d o w e feel a b o u t th e cock ring th a t resembles a cross b e tw e e n a fish and a don ut? M y guess is th a t m any a g irl w o u ld flip her fe m in is t shit w ere a g u y to suggest she

w ear so m e th in g th e size o f h e r hand to "im pro ve her p erfo r­ mance."

So d o w e fem ales feel co m fo rta b le in o u r self-righteous sex to y p ositio n m erely because w e serve o u r toys w ith hors d'oeuvres and candlelight? O r is it th a t none o f th e toys re­ sem ble actual sexual organs— unlike th e fake vagina— b u t com e in p a in t c h ip shades like "refreshing lilac?" Does th e co lo u r lilac specifically p ro m o te th e "safe b o d y sense" th a t seems to run tw o steps b eh ind sex to y m a rketin g like a m o m w aving a hat and scarf after her kid in w inter? O r is there so m e th in g in h e re n tly fem ale th a t needs to feel "safe" w h e n having an orgasm? The inside o f th a t fake vagina did feel a little like th e w o m b ... A nd if th is Sex Toy Lady w ere instead Ludacris standing in o u r living room te llin g us he's “g o t c o n ­ d om s in a big-ass-sack," w o u ld w e all choke on o u r pâté or nod and say,"All right, let's d o it."

I can hear you c h a n tin g "C unt!" in th e audience at the Vagina Monologues, b u t I also k n o w th a t you can't g e t o ff on you r o w n to a nyth in g th a t doesn't resem ble th e colours fo u n d in a m a rshm a llow je lly salad. Incidentally, that's p rob a bly w h a t th e y served a t tho se Avon p a rtie s ... ■

13.02.07 •The McGill Tribune •9

TR TETINE

EDITORIAL

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aving a s tu d e n t voice at th e h ig h est levels o f university g o v e rn m e n t is im p o rta n t, as is being able to choose th a t voice. Since th e university's h ig h est g o v e rn in g b o d y w as restruc­ tured in 2005 , representation on McGill's Board o f G overnors has been an o n g o in g issue. The debate reached a n ew lo w this w eek w ith new s th a t th e Students' Society plans to sue McGill to force it to a llo w th e Society's president to sit a t th e tab le d u r­ ing m eetings.T here m u st be a b e tte r way.

In a special C ouncil session last Thursday, SSMU President A a ron -D on n y Clark proposed th a t if McGill d id n o t a llo w th e president o f th e Society to sit on BoG, SSMU w o u ld sue th e u niversity u nd er Section 32 o f th e Q uebec A c t R especting th e A c­ cre d ita tio n and Financing o f S tudents'Associations.

W hen BoG w as re structured in January 2005 , th e SSMU president lost a seat on th e Board, leaving students on th e d o w n to w n cam pus represented by o n ly one student. SSMU a tte m p te d to g e t around this by having students vote on a c o n s titu ­ tion al a m e n d m e n t th a t declared th e president to be its BoG rep. The Board rejected th e plan, saying th a t th e s tu d e n t representative needed to take at least 18 credits per academ ic year. SSMU executives generally take three o r six p er semester.

Last year, SSMU a p p o in te d an in te rim BoG rep and had th e n -p re s id e n t A dam C onter declared a "stud e nt resource person,"giving h im th e p o w e r to speak, b u t n o t vote. W ith th e situation app aren tly u nd er control, students again vote d to am en d the c o n s titu tio n , w ith th e provision th a t th e elected representative be a p p o in te d by C ouncil in 2006-07 and elected by th e s tu d e n t b o d y in th e fo llo w in g years. It w as also assum ed th a t he w o u ld sit w ith th e President.

All w as w ell and g o o d u n til this past sum m er, w h e n D onny-C lark w as to ld th a t he w o u ld n o t be given th e same tre a tm e n t as Conter, leaving SSMU w ith o n ly one BoG rep, A rts S enator Jake Itzkow itz. But after learning th a t D onny-C lark w o u ld n 't be a llow ed o n th e Board, Itzko w itz resigned his posi­ tion.

SSMU m em bers m ust, u n d o u b te d ly, have th e rig h t to e le ct th e ir o w n representative. But a law ­ suit? H istory has sho w n th a t w h e n students com e to g e th e r and p u t o ve rw h e lm in g pressure on th e university, change can and does happen. A fte r all, w e d id n 't always have a seat on th e Board, o r repre­ sentation at Senate.

Itzkow itz's resignation has had no e ffe ct on BoG and rem oved th e o n ly v o tin g und ergra d ua te s tu d e n t on th e university's h ig h est decision-m ak­

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tio n , w h ic h was th e n rejected by BoG m em bers. It seems logical, therefore, to p u t pressure on those m em bers.

W hy n o t b u y a tho usa nd post-cards, address th e m to BoG m em bers and have stu d en ts b egin a le tte r-w ritin g cam p aig n to th e Board? U nder a d e l­ uge o f letters and emails, it w o u ld have been nearly im possible fo r BoG to ign o re these com plaints.

SSMU cou ld also have g athered a large g ro u p at one o f th e Principal's Tow n Halls— like th e one th a t occurred yesterday— to b ring th e issue to her at­ te n tio n in person. Or it cou ld take th a t g ro u p to a BoG m e e tin g and sho w th e G overnors th a t stu­ dents take this issue seriously. It w orke d, at least partially, in th e fig h t fo r space for th e Sexual Assault C entre o f McGill Students'Society.

U nfortunately, th e S ociety has decide d on a d iffe re n t course o f action. Just as it d id w ith FEUQ it has chosen to storm o ff in a huff, e xp e ctin g th e o th e r side to concede to its dem ands. W hile this ta c tic m ay w o rk on th e playground, in th e a d u lt w o rld , n e g o tia tio n and com p ro m ise are king. M c­ Gill stu d en ts sho uld be represented at BoG, n o t in cou rt. ■ M allory D ash

OFF THE BOARD

A d v e r t is in g M a n a g e r

advmgr@ssmu.mcgill.ca

ing body. If he stayed at th e table, Itzkow itz could be a perpetual th o rn in th e Board's side, raising th e issue o f th e c re d it re qu ire m e nt every tim e th e g o v ­ e rnin g b o d y m et. Instead, his absence gives BoG a free pass to ign o re students'concerns.

M oreover, w ith a representative, SSMU cou ld have had its voice heard d u rin g th e re a p p o in tm e n t process fo r Principal H eather M unroe-B lum . Had SSMU kep t its seat, it cou ld have o pposed her re­ a p p o in tm e n t, d en yin g McGill th e o p p o rtu n ity to tru m p e t th e una nim o us vote. Instead Vice-Presi­ d e n t U niversity Affairs Finn U pham said, "You d o n 't k n o w if it w o u ld have been u nanim ous had there been an und ergra d ua te on th e board."W hen SSMU sto m p e d o ff to be in th e corne r by itself, it lost th e rig h t to m ake such statem ents.

W hile SSMU's a tte m p t to p ro te ct stu d e n t rights are adm irable, suing M cG ill is neithe r a quick nor cheap course o f action. Litig atio n is b o u n d to take years to g e t th ro u g h th e legal system and cost thousands o f stu d e n t dollars th a t c o u ld be b e tte r spe nt elsewhere.

The issue rig h t n o w is w ith th e Board itself.

SSMU cam e to a com p ro m ise w ith th e a dm inistra­

T

here are m any problem s w ith man, b u t fore­ m ost am ong th e m is a natural ten de ncy to overvalue th e short term w hen calculating benefits. Luckily, w e have fou nd a w ay to correct this fau lt by using th e m ost im p o rta n t to o l in the history o f m ankind: price. Over th e last seven m illion years or so, m an has developed m any tools th a t w ere so im p o rta n t th a t life as w e kno w it today sim ply could n o t exist w ith o u t them . For th e purposes o f this dis­ cussion, let us select tw o th a t are w idely recognized as turnin g points in the history o f man's jo u rn e y from glorified ape to reality television-w atching sloth: fire and th e knife.

The knife ranks as th e th ird -m o st im p o rta n t tool know n to m an— th e w heel and c om p ute r round o u t th e to p five. The first fashioning o f stones in to crude c u ttin g tools was a watershed m o m e n t th a t made hun tin g and th e division and extraction o f resources m uch easier. But could w e say th a t it was indispens­ able? A m ore d iffic u lt h un tin g process and having to tear thin gs to separate th e m w ou ld have been trem endous setbacks to m ankind, b u t certainly not insurm ountable ones.

Fire und ou bted ly ranks second. This innova­ tio n exposed our less u p rig h t ancestors to a vast new w orld o f possibilities. O rganic m atter could be cooked fo r sustenance, man was no longer blind and

vulnerable at n ig h t and an im p o rta n t resource was developed in th e constant battle to stay warm. It was also a prerequisite for o th er im p o rta n t inventions such as the forge and the com b ustion engine. That being said, civilization w ou ld still be possible w ith ­ o u t it. Man could have survived on raw foods and w hile th e losses to industry, culture and hum anity as a w hole w ou ld have been massive, the y w ould n ot have been insurm ountable.

This brings us to price. The term is d ifficu lt to define, b u t as for its use as a tool, let's settle on the ability to attach value to objects. Value need n o t be m onetary b u t instead could be that, say, a table is w o rth three chickens. Price is man's ability to assign to an obje ct some w o rth n o t entirely determ ined by im m ediate need.

H ow has price been im p o rta n t to mankind?

Firstly, it has m ade possible the exchange o f goods and services by allow ing people to trade objects o f similar value. Does th a t make price an indispensable to o l o f society? Consider w ha t life w ou ld be like if it did n o t exist. W ith o u t orderly trade, w e w ould be liv­ ing in a Lockean state o f nature w here people sim ply sought to acquire th e resources necessary for their survival by force. Civilization cannot exist w ith o u t price.

Secondly, price allows th e hum an con ditio n to

C harlie B lore

be ameliorated. Two o f the biggest problem s facing society today, obesity and clim ate change, are fu n ­ dam entally issues o f people overvaluing th e present benefits and underestim ating th e long-term costs o f certain choices (e.g. eating a Big Mac or driving an SUV).

Price can solve b o th o f these problem s. One o f th e largest causes o f th e obesity epidem ic is th e fact th a t ju n k food is cheaper in m onetary term s than the healthful variety. Junk food w ou ld be m ore expen­ sive if th e costs to one's health and w ell-being were factored in, b u t these costs are d iffic u lt to define and thus often ignored by consumers. A tax on ju n k foods could correct this miscalculation, w hich is a reality o f hum an nature.

The story is m uch th e same for clim ate change, w here people are unable to properly calculate the tru e costs o f the ir actions because th e y are spread over a long tim e period. A tax w ou ld recalibrate pric­ es in a w ay th a t takes in to account an action's nega­ tive externalities.

Price has g otten us this far and it w ill continue to carry us into th e future. W hile o ther tools have helped us to m o dify th e w orld around us to o ur ad­ vantage, price is th e m ost im p o rta n t means thro u g h w hich we've developed to m o dify and correct our, o w n nature. ■

The McGill Tribune is an editorially autonomous newspaper published by the Students'Society of McGill University in collaboration with the Tribune Publication Society. Opinions expressed do not necessarily represent those of the Students'Society or McGill University. Letters to the editor may be sent to letters@mcgilltribune.com and must include the contributor's name, program and year and contact information. Letters should be kept under 300 words and submitted only to the Tribune. Submissions judged by theTribune Publication Society to be libellous, sexist, racisUiomophobic or solely promotional in nature will not be published. The Tribune reserves the right to edit all contributions.

Editorials are decided upon and written by the editorial board. All other opinions are strictly those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the McGill Tribune, its editors or its staff. Please recycle this newspaper.

10 •The McGill Tribune •13.02.07

VOX POPULI

Iranians aren't all racists

Letters to the editor G ender p a rity is rid icu lo u s I w ould like to thank th e McGill Tribune for publishing Kate Spirgen's article, "Gender parity is an insult to w om en." I had a reaction similar to Spirgen's w hen I heard th a t th e GA passed a m o tio n requiring th a t all future GAs fo llo w gen­ der parity, and have speakers alternate male and non-male.

This m o tio n is ridiculous, insulting, sexist and a waste o f tim e. It prom otes a backwards m e ntality th a t w om e n need special treatm ent, th a t w e can't possibly hold o ur o w n in a debate against big, bad men. Even if there are w om e n at future GAs u ncom fortable debating against men, w h a t exactly w ill fo llo w in g rules o f gender parity accomplish? If a w om an is uncom fortable speak­ ing in opp osition o f a man's opinion, it's g oin g to take a lo t m ore than a little special tre a tm e n t to fix that.

— Allison McNeely ih political science M ore free e d u ca tio n nonsense Ben Lemieux seems to believe th a t acces­ sible education is desirable ("Hike for th e hike," 06 .02 .07), as d o I. W hat w e disagree on is th e lo­ gistics o f it.

Let's consider m y situation for a m inute. I pay Q uebec tu itio n fees. Last summ er, I had a full-tim e jo b th a t paid $11 an hour and I earned approxi­ m ately $7,500 th a t paid fo r tu itio n , books and

rent. I n ow w ork part-tim e and earn an additional $80 to $ioo every week th a t pays for day-to-day thin gs such as food and to ile t paper.

If tu itio n goes up, I'm in debt. Everybody w h o was unable to find fu ll-tim e w ork at $11 an hour (a dam n g oo d deal for a student) is already in debt. To avoid debt, one w ould either need to be ind e pe nd en tly w ealthy (in th e 18-21 group, those are few and far betw een) or have som eone (e.g. parents) w illin g to sup po rt them . Access to education is thus based on academ ically irrel­ evant personal characteristics. If w e rule these criteria o u t due to the ir discrim inatory nature, the n alm ost every person w ith o nly a high school degree w ou ld be eligible for g overnm e nt fu n d ­ ing under th e o ft-to u te d high-tuition /ge ne ro usaid scheme. W ou ldn 't it be m uch sim pler to ju s t grant free post-secondary education?

Let's say you still feel th a t incurring d eb t or w orking for a fe w years is a g oo d character­ b uilding experience (let's for n o w ignore tha t this am ounts to regressive taxation for w e only in flic t this burden on poorer students). Then w hy shouldn't people start to bear th e costs o f the ir education as soon as th e y can: age 16 (even 14 under certain conditions)? The answer is th a t at some p o in t society agreed th a t everyone should be educated until som e arbitrary lim it. W hy d on't w e extend said limit?

— Lazar Konforti BSc '06

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The McGill

TRIBUNE

H a s s a n S h o j a n ia H.SHOJANIA@UTORONTO.CA

I am an Iranian-Canadian w h o w o u ld n 't have left Iran and m ade Canada his h om e if it w asn't fo r M a h m o u d A hm ad ine jad and his lo t ru n n in g Iran. A t th e same tim e, I d o n 't th in k th a t y o u r recent article “Calling o u t Iran" (30 .01 .07 ) is fair o r accurate.

Valuing d em o cracy and hum a n rights myself, I fail to understand Corey Shefman's a rg u m e n t a b o u t "le g itim izin g genocide." No d o u b t th e D arfur situation is tragic, b u t h o w does th a t relate to th e Iran situation? "A H o­ locaust in th e m aking?" How? By w h o m , h o w and why? A "genocide" needs a g ro u p o f peo ple to g o and a ctually c o m m it it, right?

Does Shefm an suggest th a t th e Iranian p eo ­ ple are linin g up to c o m m it genocide? Is it all based on A hm adinejad's "w ip e o ff" c o m ­ ments? Shefm an should k n o w by n o w th a t th e y w ere taken o u t o f context.

I was raised in th e years o f th e revolu­ tio n in Iran and recall Ayatollah K hom eini m aking sim ilar c o m m e n ts som e 26 years ago. H owever, as British jo u rn a lis t Jonathan Cook poin ts o ut, th e c o n te x t in w h ic h th e c o m m e n ts w ere m ade is essential to th e m atter. "K hom eini and A hm ad ine jad w ere referring to th e need fo r regim e change, th e e n d in g o f th e regim e o ccu p yin g th e Palestinians in v io la tio n o f inte rn atio na l law," Cook said. "They w ere n o t talking, as N etan­ yahu and [com pany] claim , a b o u t th e d e ­ struction o f th e state o f Israel o r th e Jewish people. The im p lica tio n o f th e speech is th a t th e c u rre n t Israeli regim e w ill end because o ccu p yin g pow ers are ille g itim a te and u n ­ sustainable, n o t because Iran plans to fire nuclear missiles at th e Jewish state? o r c o m ­ m it genocide."

Shefm an says, "A hm adinejad has real­ ized th a t th e best w ay to reach o u t to his p o p u la tio n is this anti-S em itic, H olocaustdenying, g e n o c id e -in citin g rhetoric." He does n o t seem to k n o w m uch a b o u t th e Iranian people's m indset. A hm ad ine jad w o n a rigged and u nfair e le ctio n by presenting h im se lf as an o utside r on an a n ti-c o rru p tio n and e co n o m ic reform p la tform , n o t on b e ­ c o m in g a clueless anti-Israel ch a m p io n . She­ fm an is rig h t th a t A hm ad ine jad is a p op ulist b u t he is w ro n g w h e n he singles o u t Iran's pop ula tio n.

IT WORKS!

A hm adinejad's rh eto ric is at its s tron ­ gest w h e n he is outside Iran; he has also m ade num erous o th e r gaffes on b o th in ­ ternal and foreig n issues. Yes, he uses th e H olocaust fo r his o w n politica l purposes, b u t Shefm an does th e same. Furtherm ore, "anti-S em itism " has a w h o le d iffe re n t m ean­ ing th a n anti-Israel o r q u e stio n in g th e H olo ­ caust. The H olocaust conference, w h ic h was a sham and propaganda, w as a tte n d e d by a fe w rabbis. T h o u g h h and-picked fo r th e ir p olitical views, I d o u b t th a t Shefm an be lieves th a t th e rabbis w ere anti-Semites.

In fact, A v ig d o r Lieberm an, one o f Is­ rael's d e p u ty p rim e m inisters and a p o p u la r figure, is o fte n called a racist w ith in Israel. Is it fair fo r all Israelis to be ju d g e d based on Li eberm an's com m en ts, as Iranians are ju d g e d on A hm adinejad's? A p p a re n tly w e b o th have o u r o w n share o f crazy politicians.

A fe w m o n th s ago, Iranian students dared to b urn A hm adinejad's p ictu re at one o f his speeches. In Decem ber, his p arty suf fered a bad e le ctio n defeat, takin g o n ly tw o seats on Tehran's c ity council. Politicians com e and g o and A hm ad ine jad is no d iffe r­ ent. In th e M id dle East, peo ple have o fte n been d e m o nized fo r th e actions o f th e ir p o l­ iticians th ro u g h propaganda; it is no w o n d e r th a t it is still such a big mess. I certa inly d o n 't th in k it fair o r a p p ro pria te to use th e same ty p e o f language in p ro m o tin g one's cause in Canada. Can't w e d o b e tte r by advoca tin g universal hum an rights?

Iranians o fte n take on th e ir to ta lita r­ ian rulers by m aking jokes a b o u t th e m . Text message jokes are w idespread the re and th e h o tte s t to p ic is, o f course, A hm adinejad.

Som e Iranian satirists and cartoonists have described A hm adinejad's reign as th e best o p p o rtu n ity o f th e ir careers— I w o u ld b e t th a t th e n ext person w h o bursts in to la u g h ­ ter in Tehran is reading a jo k e a b o u t A h m a ­ dinejad. The m oral o f th e story is th a t ju s t as a b o o k c a n n o t be ju d g e d by its cover, a country's p o p u la tio n should n o t be ju d g e d by one crazy p oliticia n alone.

Hassan Shojania is a PhD student a t the University o f Toronto, but that doesn't make him an anti-Semite.

J le ( fa itie n Barbershop

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T h u rs d a y

F r id a y

S a tu rd a y

Sunday

Joseph Giunta: A Silent Triumph pre­ sented by McGill Programs in Whole Person Care Moyse Hall, Arts Building @ 7 p.m.

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C am pus L iv in g

CH A TTERBOX

O h C h a u c e r, b e m y V a le n tin e ?

Professor Fumo teaches how to court your loved one— medieval style ciplinary inclinations. O ften students com e to m y class having read a b it o f Chaucer and m ainly ju s t th e baw dy stuff. I th in k o f him as a great com ic poet, b u t there is m ore to . him than that, he is b o th learned and com ic.

English literature professor Jamie Fumo is our resident Chaucerian spe­ cialist, one who harbours an inherent desire for flying and firefighting. She is passionate about the field o f medieval literature and is clearly enamoured with the first great English poet. But who wouldn't be? Although he was a little portly, Chaucer was smart, funny and perhaps one o f the founding fathers o f Valentine's Day— quite the catch!

In a T.V. m in ise rie s C haucer w o u ld be p la yed b y ... It is really d iffic u lt to decide because I have a particular vision o f him in m y head, a m edieval image, illustrated in som e o f th e images I have up in m y office.

I th in k th e m o s t ro m a n tic c o u rtly love p o e m is ... Chaucer's Troilus and Criseyde. It represents ro­ m ance in th e m edieval sense, w hich is q u ite sceptical. However, Chaucer was th e first to make m e n tio n o f Valentine's Day w ith in English p oe try in The Parliament o f Fowls. It's a story o f birds, and every year on Valentine's Day th e birds have to choose th e ir mates.

S tu d e n ts w o u ld be su rprise d to k n o w ... th a t I was born in Hawaii!

I lived the re until age 15 and th e n m y fa m ily m oved to Massachusetts and ever since th e n I lived in th e N ew England area, until co m in g to McGill.

T ypical s tu d e n ts in te re ste d in m e d ie va l lite ra tu re a re ... a broad range, m any o f w h o m have interdis­

As far as m o de rn actors go, I w ou ld choose Charles Laughton to play Chaucer. He starred in The Private Life o f Henry VIII and played Dr. M oreau in The Island o f Lost Souls (b oth from 1933 ). I can envision him cap turin g Chaucer's sense o f urbane irony.

The m o s t e m ba rrassin g th in g th a t has h a p p e n e d to m e in a lec­ tu r e ... is th a t I spontaneously started speaking m id d le English w h ile read­ ing a transliterated passage [trans­ lated fro m a no th er alphabet] th a t was in m odern day English. I could sw itch to m id d le English fo r th e rest o f th e interview , b u t th e n you'd have to translate it!

As a k id I w a n te d to b e ... a high school teacher. But w he n I was really y ou ng I w an te d to be a firew om an, until I g o t o ld eno ug h to realize h o w scary th a t w o u ld be.

If I c o u ld have a s u p e rp o w e r it w o u ld b e ... to fly! It's a really generic answer, b u t I w o u ld really like to fly. I have recurrent dream s w here I can fly and I ju s t recently registered it, I guess th e desire is som ew here deep in m y AMYGLICKSMAN unconscious. Also, th e a b ility to read P ro fe sso r F u m o s p e a k s m id d le three books at once.

E n g lis h .T a lk a b o u t b e in g b ilin g u a l.

— Compiled by Joanna Reznick

at Q u e e n

A P P L Y

O N L IN E

www.queensu.ca/sgsr SEE APPLICATION PROCEDURES

£

FO O D FO R TH O U G H T

S w e e t, s w e e t g r a tin A tomato-filled platter of love L in d s a y F r a n k Since w h e n d id ch o co la te be­ co m e th e u ncon tested ruler o f Valen­ tine's Day? It's a b o u t tim e th a t som e o th e r fo o d stepped u p to th e chal­ lenge, and to m a to , I choose you. To­ m atoes con tain lycopene, a n u trie n t th a t helps p reve nt prostate cancer in m en and cervical intra-ep ith elia l neoplasia in w o m e n — b o th o f w h ich sound scary. Besides p ro te ctin g th e parts you d e fin ite ly w a n t to keep fu n c ­ tio n in g , to m a to e s are tasty and they're red, th e co lo u r o f love.

E ggplant-Tom ato Gratin Ingredients: 2 e g g p la n ts (1 Ib/soo g each) 1 c u p shredded mozzarella cheese 2 tb s p grated parm esan cheese T om ato Sauce: 2 cans (14 oz each) che rry tom a toe s (undrained) 'A c u p to m a to paste 1 small o nio n, fin e ly ch o p p e d 2 cloves garlic, m inced 1 large bay leaf 1 tb s p d ried basil 1 tsp dried oregano p ep pe r p in ch o f sugar (optional)

Steps: (1 ) C ut egg pla nts in h alf le n g th ­ wise; prick skin w ith fork. Place c u t side d o w n on lig h tly greased baking sheet; bake in oven at 450 degrees fo r 20 m inutes. Let cool, th e n c u t crosswise in to 1 cm th ic k slices.

(2 ) For th e to m a to sauce: E m pty cans o f tom a toe s in to large heavy saucepan. If desired, drain Va cup o f liqu id fro m one can o f tom atoes; dis­ card and add Va c u p w h ite w in e to th e pan. Crush tom a toe s w ith avail­ able to o l (fork, etc.), th e n add to m a to paste, o nion, garlic, bay leaf, basil and oregano. Simmer, uncovered, fo r 20 to 30 m inutes. Season w ith p e p p e r and sugar. Remove bay leaf.

(3) In 8-inch (2 L) square bak­ ing dish, spread th in layer o f sauce; cover w ith layer o f e gg pla nt. Repeat w ith sauce, th e n e gg pla nt, th e n sauce.

Sprinkle w ith m ozzarella and parm e ­ san. Bake a t 400 degrees fo r 25 to 30 m inutes or u n til b ro w n e d and bubbly.

Makes 6 m ain-course servings; 141 Calories per serving. ■

Recipe adapted fro m A nne Lind­ say's Lighthearted Everyday Cooking.

F EATURES BE JPROTECTED, U HAVE sCOOTIES

TEST ME PURRFECH BACTERIA

Spreading the Love on Valentine's Day The most com m on gift on cam pus: HPV virus in b o th m en and w o m e n , as w e ll as see h o w HPV is transm itted," he explains.

The necessity fo r this stu d y is rather sim ple: HPV Valentine's Day is th e sex shop ow ner's m o st a ntic­ is c o m m o n . So c o m m o n th a t over 70 per c e n t o f th e ipated tim e o f o f th e year. W ith eager custom ers stack­ w orld's sexually active p o p u la tio n has, at one p o in t or ing u p on g oo die s to keep them selves w arm , cozy and another, con tracte d th e disease. satisfied arou n d th e eve Since college cam puses te n d to be o f Feb. 14 , p rod u cts sell, HPV: X c h ro m o s o m e vs Y w a te rin g holes fo r sexual activity, stu­ revenues increase and c h ro m o s o m e dents are at a particularly h ig h risk o f everyone goes h om e O u t o f th e 12 to 20 peo ple Dr. c o n tra c tin g HPV. happy.

Pierre-Paul Tellier, d ire cto r o f m e di­ "M ost o f th e research th a t I have Everyone in clu d ­ cal e d u ca tio n and s tu d e n t affairs at looked at in universities across Canada ing th e hum a n p a p illo ­ McGill, sees w h e n he w orks at th e dem onstrates that...HPV cases are ex­ mavirus. clinic, o n ly three or fo u r com e spe­ tre m e ly frequent," Kelsall m aintains.

M ore c o m m o n ly cifically fo r STI testing.

They are a lm ost as fre q u e n t as th e kn o w n by its acronym , Tellier also notes th a t fem ale deed itself: m o st students w o u ld agree HPV, this virus is "n o t d octors w ill likely d o m ore STI test­ th a t g e ttin g laid on a regular basis is one o n ly th e m o st preva­ ing tha n he w ill. This is because o f th e m a jor perks o f u niverisity life. len t STI on college w o m e n o fte n request fem ale d o c­ "If you d o n 't have standards it's p ret­ cam puses, b u t also on tors and interestingly, w o m e n te n d ty easy,"says Anna Hayden, U 3 b iom edical th e planet," says Gail to com e in m ore o fte n fo r test­ studies and ling u istic stu d ies."lf you g o to Kelsall, nurse coo rd iing tha n m en. This is p artly due to a McGill p arty and you w a n t to g e t drunk, n a to r/co n s u lta n t at th e fact th a t annual g yn ecological you can g e t laid."

McGill S tud en t Health exams fo r w o m e n generally include Kelsall agrees. W hen "a y o u n g m an Services. Kelsall acts as som e STI testing. o r a y o u n g w o m a n w an ts to have sex, it a research nurse fo r th e Dr. Tellier, how ever, also argues isn't d iffic u lt, especially on an urban cam ­ H ITCH-Cohort Study, a th a t "w o m e n are m ore tra ine d to pus such as McGill's."

M cG ill-based research care a b o u t these issues" in o u r s o jjSo, ju s t w h y is HPV so prevalent? e ndeavour th a t stands e ty tha n m en are. f "It's a very sm art virus," fo r HPV in fe c tio n and Franco insists. Since hum an transm ission a m on g p apillom avirus solely affects couples th ro u g h h et­ th e o u te r layer o f th e skin, it erosexual activity. is m ore transm issible tha n W ith a b o u t 600 p a rtic ip a tin g couples, th e o th e r c o m m o n STIs, such as study encom passes b o th HPV research and aware­ g o n orrhe a o r chlam ydia. ness.

F u rth e rm ore, this sexually tra n s m itte d "M cG ill is th e leading centre o f HPV research in in fe c tio n does n o t require, w ell, sex. all o f Canada," says Professor Eduardo Franco, "HPV doesn't necessarily need d irect d ire cto r o f th e D ivision o f Cancer Epide­ intercourse to take its course, ju s t genital m io lo g y at McGill and th e p rim a ry ar­ contact," Franco says. Un­ c h ite c t b e h in d HITCH. fortu n ately, th e genital c o n ta c t cate go ry does in­ G e ttin g H itc h e d c lu d e anal and oral sex.

HITCH is the W hat's even m ore first study o f its kind, d iscon certin g is th a t if you u niq ue ly targ e tin g o r y o u r little lovebird b e ­ couples instead o f in ­ co m e infected, you w ill dividuals. In th e past, likely be unaw are o f it. "there have been a HPV is tra n s m itte d pri­ lo t o f HPV studies m arily b y sexual p a rt­ c o n d u c te d on single ners th a t have few, p e o p l e — m a in ly if any, sym ptom s. w om en," Franco says.

Since th e virus M e dically speaking, lacks visible sym ptom s and Franco insists th a t affects o n ly th e d ire ctin g HPV skin's surface research to ­ la y e r s — o f t e n w ards h etero ­ w ith o u t d ire c t pen ­ sexual couples e t r a t io n — p o p u la r is m ore in fo rm a ­ con trace ptive m e th ­ tive. ods, such as con ­ "We can [sim ul­ dom s, m ay n o t ta n e o u s ly ] th o ro u g h ly pro­ check th e te c t you against p re s e n c e infection. of th e Rachel M

SWEET HERPES

HEALTHY HOTTIE

BLISTER ME CRAZY

POXY LADY

RU CLEAN?

RAUNCHY RUBBER

e l n ik

G ir l: I w o n d e r w h a t he's g iv in g m e fo r V a le n tin e 's D a y..

B o y : She's g o in g to b e s o s u rp ris e d !

[(

WEINER

111

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DIRTY

J

Uh oh.

P laying th e fie ld W hat, the n, can sexually active students d o to pre ­ v e n t HPV? "N othing," Kelsall claims, b u t notes th a t practicing safe sex m ay help th e situation.

"The fe w e r [sexual] partners, th e better,” she advis­ es, "b u t there's still a chance th a t you'll g e t HPV at one p o in t o r a n o th e r in y o u r sexual life."

However, before you panic and co n ve rt to absti­ nence in viral self-defence, take a fe w deep breaths.

HPV, th o u g h prevalent, is easily rem ediable."The nature o f th e virus does n o t cause a lo t o f harm," Franco says.

Sexy-time There are over 100 types o f viruses th a t m ake up th e "b ig h ap py HPV family," Franco says. M any o f th e m d o n 't have sym ptom s. But if you're con ce rn e d — and if you're sexually active you sho uld be— here are som e HPV sym ptom s and facts to loo k for: • In w o m e n , gen ita l w arts m ay appear on th e vulva, urethra, cervix, vagina, anus or thighs.

• In m en, w arts m ay appear on th e penis, scrotum , anus or thighs.

• These w arts com e in m any a variety: raised or flat, single o r m u ltip le , small o r large, even cauliflo w er-like clusters. They can be grey, red o r p in k (à la Valentine's Day).

• The w arts are n o t usually painful, b u t m ig h t be a ccom panied b y itc h in g o r o th e r ir­ ritation.

• W arts o n o th e r b o d y parts, Such as hands, are caused by d iffe re n t HPV types, and c o n ta c t w ith these w ill cause gen ita l w arts.

• The types o f HPV th a t cause genital and anal w arts are d iffe re n t fro m th e types th a t cause cervical cancer.

— compiled by the McGill University Student Health Service "M ost o f th e tim e, HPV ju s t clears u p on its o w n w ith o u t m edical in te rve n tio n . Your body's im m u n e system w ill take care o f it," Kelsall notes.

If not, tre a tm e n t o p tio n s are fast, safe and easily accessible. Usually, HPV sym ptom s can be m anaged w ith a fo rm o f m edicated o in tm e n t o r laser therapy.

Yet, if le ft untreated, th e lo n g -te rm affects o f HPV can be fatal, especially fo r w om e n.

"In 1995 , th e scientific c o m m u n ity d e te rm in e d th a t th e HPV infe ctio n was th e prim ary, unequivocal

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13.02.07 •The McGill Tribune •13

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J GOT VD?

M cG ill is a p e tri d ish o f STIs— b u t w h o is to blam e?

A cco rd ing to th e Canadian M edical 1Association's "Canadian G uidelines on Sexually tra n s m itte d Infections o f 2006," th e prevalence o f Chlam ydia, gonorrhea and syphilis has increased over th e past decade. Efforts to reduce incidences o f these infectious venereal diseases, n o t surprisingly, inclu de b o th e ncou ra gin g safe sex practices and p ro m o tin g th e im p o rta n c e o f STI testing across th e country.

A t McGill, how ever, m any students fin d them selves shocked to discover th a t it can take over a m o n th to g e t an a p p o in tm e n t fo r these basic— and im p erative — tests and u p to fo u r weeks after th a t (d ep e nd ing on th e disease tested) to g e t th e results. Usually, tests involve n o th in g m ore tha n b lo o d o r urine samples, unless the re is a special circum stance th a t w o u ld involve sending th e re s u lts to a private lab. A nd yet, th e y cost nothin g.

— compiled by Meghna Marjadi cause o f cervical cancer," says Franco. "It's possible th a t th e HPV infected cells can b ecom e m a lig n a n t and th e cervix is particularly affected.”

ated a test th a t specifically screens fo r HPV, w h ic h is m ore accurate and "w ill e ve ntu ally replace th e pap test," Franco claims.

W hile th e pap test m ay n o t necessarily be th e m ost e ffic ie n t m e th o d o f HPV testing, it rem ains th e m ost p o p u la r because o f its cost-effectiveness. Yet, acco rdin g to Lev Bukhm an, Executive D irector o f th e Q uebec S tud en t H ealth Alliance, provincial insurance does cover th e HPV screen test.The HPV vaccine, w h ic h has recently garnered a great deal o f m edia a tte n tio n , is Over 70 per cent of the world's n o t y e t covered by provincial A re p a p tests e n o u g h ? active population insurance. H owever, SSMU The pap test is a m e d i­ sexually has, at one point or another, ■Health Insurance covers McGill cal screening process th a t checks fo r HPV as w ell as contracted the disease." stu d en ts w h o w a n t The HPV o th e r cervical problem s. Yet vaccine. "This is an especially im p o rta n t [scientific] d e v e lo p m e n t, because it is th e th e test, also called a pap smear, is n o t w ith o u t its dis­ first vaccine in h istory th a t can actually p reve nt cancer," advantages.

"A pap test o n ly tests fo r [cervical] abnorm alities," Bukhm an notes. says Julia A nsw orth, a masters s tu d e n t in im m u n o lo g y McGill's Faculty o f M e dicine is playing a p ro m i­ and m icro bio log y, w h o researches fo r Professor M atlan e n t role in th e d e v e lo p m e n t in th e HPV vaccine. "M y u n it w as responsible fo r th e design o f one o f th e trials," shewski, HPV researcher and d e p a rtm e n t chairm an. "It Franco says. "The HPV vaccine offers extre m e ly safe p ro ­ w ill n o t specifically tell you w h e th e r o r n o t you have HPV. [Furtherm ore], it w o n 't tell you w h a t ty p e o f HPV te c tio n as w ell as d urability. It can be e ffective fo r u p to you have— if it is an aggressive, cancer-causing fo rm o f io years." He th e n adds, o p tim is tic a lly:"In 2007 , an even th e virus," o r a m ild e r strain. stron ge r vaccine w ill be o u t in th e market."

So u n til this m ore effectual vaccine is available, Franco also m aintains th a t th e pap test is unreli­ able. He insists th a t "th e pap te st is extre m e ly in e ffi­ you sho uld g e t an HPV screening o f y o u r choice, a c o n ­ d o m and a g o o d ie bag fro m th e cam pus Shag Shop. cient, especially w h e n it com es to false negatives. It's It'll m ake y o u r Valentine's Day all th e m ore, shall w e say, ju s t like a coin flip... There's a fifty per c e n t p ro b a b ility th a t you'll g e t th e rig h t diagnosis." Scientists have cre ­ shag-w orthy. ■ In o th e r w ords, if a w o m a n happens to g e t d ia g ­ nosed w ith cervical cancer, she has m o st likely had HPV. Nearly every case o f cervical cancer has been linked to a fo rm o f this easily tre ata ble virus.

"In Canada, over 45 ,ooo w o m e n die each year o f cervical cancer,"says Kelsall. "And yet, it is preventable."

For this reason, th e m edical c o m m u n ity insists HPV awareness is a bsolu tely essential.

"It's im p o rta n t fo r sexually active w o m e n to g e t a pap test," Kelsall says.

SEXY SORES

URZ ITCHY

NICE TEST(ES)

Shaggin' in the sand?

Beer goggles m ay be the least of your worries T erri A

lderfer

Aah, re ad ing w eek. K no w n as spring break to th e rest o f th e w o rld , th is is th e o n e blessed w eek in th e aca de m ic year w h e n stu d e n ts can fin a lly kick back, relax, fo rg e t a b o u t m id te rm s and have som e fu n in th e sun (or snow, as th e case m ay be). If you're hea din g d o w n s o u th to escape th e b itte r M o ntre al w in te r, you're p ro b a b ly lo o k in g fo rw a rd to le ttin g loose and ta k in g a dvan tag e o f th e a ll-y o u -c a n -d rin k lifestyle offe re d by m any resorts. A n d hey, w h a t h a p ­ pens in C ancun stays in C ancun, right?

N o t always. U n lim ite d a lc o h o l supply, h un dred s o f b a th in g suit-cla d tw e n ty s o m e th in g s and relaxed in h ib itio n s o fte n results in stu d e n ts re tu rn in g to M cG ill w ith an u n w a n te d sou ven ir— in th e fo rm o f a sexually tra n s m itte d in fe ctio n .

The M o n d a y a fte r reading w ee k is th e busi­ est day o f th e year fo r stu d e n ts c o m in g in to g e t checked fo r STIs, says Gail Kelsall, nurse c o o rd in a to r/ c o n s u lta n t at M cG ill S tu d e n t H ealth Services."To say 're ad ing w e e k ' is a joke , because m o st stu d e n ts g o o ff to som e e xo tic place and th e lifestyle is lots o f p a rty in g and alcohol," she says.

A c co rd in g to H ealth Canada, cases o f c h la m y d ­ ia, g o n o rrh e a and in fe ctio u s syphilis have all been o n th e rise in Canada since 1997 and fo u r p er ce n t o f sexually a ctive is -to - 24 -year-olds re p o rte d having

been d ia g no se d w ith an STI— a fig u re th a t is likely u n d e rre p o rte d because o f a lack o f sym p to m s or •awareness.

In fe ctio n s are o n th e rise because p e o p le are s im p ly n o t using co n d o m s, Kelsall says. P racticing safe sex becom es even m ore d iffic u lt a fte r a n ig h t o f d rin k in g , w h e n m e n ta l ju d g m e n t and m o to r c o o rd in a tio n b e c o m e im p a ire d and p e o p le te n d to m ake d ecisions th e y n o rm a lly w o u ld n 't w h e n sob er— beer g og gle s, anyone?

'It's n o t th a t it's a bad idea to have sex w h ile you're intoxicated,” says Dr. Pierre-Paul Tellier, d i­ re c to r o f m e dical e d u ca tio n and s tu d e n t affairs at M cGill, "b u t a w h o le n u m b e r o f th in g s can hap pe n w h e n you are ta k in g a lco h o l because th e y d o a ffe ct y o u r a b ility to th in k and be prepared."

Tellier says th a t th e b ig g e s t m is c o n ce p tio n stu d e n ts have a b o u t th e risk o f c o n tra c tin g STIs is b e lie v in g th a t th e ir p a rtn e r is n o t infe cte d. "A lo t o f p e o p le d o n 't te ll th e tru th and if th e y do, th e y m ay be an a s y m p to m a tic carrier, so you d o n 't th in k you're in fe c te d and y o u d o n 't ta lk to th e person a b o u t it, and a w e e k later you fin d o u t yo u 've c o n ­ tra cte d herpes fro m y o u r best friend."

■ In th e in te re st o f n o t k illin g th e m o o d , m any stu d e n ts are h esitan t to ask a p o te n tia l sexual p a rt­ ner a b o u t th e ir status. "T hat w o u ld be kind o f an a w kw a rd question," says Em ily D eeth, U2 a n th r o p o k

ogy, w h o hopes to catch a la s t-m in u te all-inclu sive deal to C uba fo r reading w eek. Instead, she prefers to rely on u sing c o n d o m s to p ro te c t herse lf fro m c o n tra c tin g an in fe ctio n .

U nd er th e in flu e n c e o f alco ho l, p e o p le are also m o re likely to force the m selves o n o th ers w h e n th e y n o rm a lly w o u ld n 't, says Tellier.

Ben S cott, U3 e d u ca tio n , is e xcite d a b o u t g o in g o n th e a ll-inclu sive M a n a g e m e n t U nd ergrad ua te S ociety trip to M argarita Island n e xt w e e k and says he isn't m o re co n ce rn e d th a n usual a b o u t his sexual health.

"It's m y first tim e tra ve llin g d o w n to S outh A m erica and I'm g o in g to have a lo t o f fu n w ith m y friends, d o som e serious d rin k in g and m aybe a little h o o k in g u p o n th e beach," S cott says.

H ow ever, he is n o t c o n c e rn e d a b o u t th e e ffe ct o f a lco h o l on his a b ility to p ractice safe sex. "I always have a co n d o m ,” he insists.

C o n d o m s aside, if you c o m e back to M o ntre al w o rrie d a b o u t a q u e stio n a b le sexual e n c o u n te r in th e sand, it is b est to g e t te s te d — even if y o u d o n 't have any sym ptom s. But n o th in g beats leaving p re ­ pared. Pick u p som e provisions a t th e Shag S hop in th e H ealth C entre and m ake sure y o u k n o w y o u r STI status b efore you leave M ontreal. If you 're p roa ctive a b o u t y o u r sexual health, w h a t h ap pe ns in C ancun m ig h t ju s t stay there. ■

TREAT ME BUMPY RIDE

GREAT BALLS OF FIRE

LOVELY LATEX

STI, BABY?

LUV YOUR RESULTS,

A rts & E n te r ta in m e n t m u s ic

Holy Arcade Fire— can cults be this fun?

Local superstars warm up for international H

e a th e r

A

nderson

Despite international success, Arcade Fire m ustered up som e indie m ystique w ith its lat­ est local gig. Releasing 50 last-m inute tickets for die-hards o nly added to th e c u lt fo llo w in g feel th a t still clings to th e n otoriou s pyromaniacs.

The band played to a crow d o f 600 at The Ukrai­ nian National Federation on H utchison Street for five nights ru nn ing last w eek— a w arm up for its u p co m in g international to u r p ro m o tin g the n ew album , Neon Bible. The im p osing façade o f th e latest venue m ay have caused it to be mis­ taken fo r a church in th e past, b u t w hen Arcade Fire p u t th e stage in flam es fro m Feb. 6 to 10 , the re was an air o f religious revival in th e air. Sat­ urday night's closing spectacle was a sacram en. tal showcase o f talent, charism a and charm.

Beneath plush red velvet curtains and bronze chandeliers, Arcade Fire blazed before a neon Bible radiating fro m centre stage. Still, it was w ith all th e enthusiasm o f an open-air revival m e eting th a t tradem ark handclaps and callbacks smeared th e a ud ie n ce /p e rfo rm e r d i­ vide in a flourish o f unrighteous revelry.

A fter a c o n fid e n t kick-off, in clu d in g th e tw o w e ig h ty n ew anthem s "M y Body Is A Cage" and "Black M irror" and th e fast-paced "Keep th e Car Running," lead sing er/g u ita rist W in Butler dis­ solved all notion s o f p ie ty by in tro d u c in g th e band. He later added a pallid "You guys are aw e­ som e" m id -w ay th ro u g h th e set. The audience, w h o seem ed strangely fam iliar w ith th e artists, m ade little use o f th e chairs and benches th a t filled th e antiqu ate d a ud ito riu m . The band, for its part, m ade little use o f th e stage: w h e th e r som eone was balancing som e thin g overhead, b o u n cin g on all fours, or subm erged in th e au­ dience, there w ere fe w o p p o rtu n itie s fo r band m em bers to experience vertigo.

The g roo vea bility o f new songs was evinced by th e audience's w illingness to catch and c o u rt th e beat (w hile dialing 1 - 866 -NEON BIBLE w ill g e t you a recording o f "Black Mirror," th e rest o f th e n ew alb u m remains unreleasecl in Canada u n til March 6). H ighlights included th e morose, m elotron-based "Ocean o f Noise" and th e lay­ ered Beach Boys b o p o f "In terve ntio n" (the "Sloop John B."beat was unm istakable). Favourites from th e band's first fu ll-le n g th release Funeral, like "Haiti," "N eigh bo urho od s no. 1 (Tunnels)" and

"no. 3 (Power Out)," peppered th e presentation.

There was n o th in g ethereal a b o u t Saturday night's interactive frenzy. One h alf e xp ected to hear "I .w ent o u t in to th e ...c ro w d "a s W in Butler's fan-sw arm ed figu re expelled th e beloved lyr­ ics. N orm ally a seven-piece o u tfit, Arcade Fire b ro u g h t 10 musicians onstage— in clu d in g tw o w inds and a second vio lin ist— h alf o f w h o m ca­ vorte d in tradem ark a m bi-instrum en ta l fashion.

The evening ended w ith a surprise: an acoustic encore o f "W ake-Up" fro m th e back o f th e room .

W h e th e r.o r n o t Arcade Fire tru ly bears the torch o f indie-rock revival or is m erely a palaver . is debatable. You m ay th in k o f th e m as th e b ig ­ gest little band in M ontreal, b u t a c u lt classic th e y are not. From th e Latin, occutere, m eaning to be hidden, a c u lt is som e thin g w hose inner w orkin gs are kept secret. Q uite to th e contrary, Arcade Fire makes itself available b o th onstage and off, as Regine Chassagne and h u b b y Win lingered by th e d o o r for pho to s and autographs before scam pering backstage.

On to p o f it all, this band know s h o w to have fun. Behind its straight-faced fro ntm a n, g uitarist Richard Reed Parry et al. shouted th e ir lungs out, o fte n g rin n in g ear to ear. One die-hard fan, w h o w aited all Thursday n ig h t to g e t a ticket, had this to say w he n asked w h e th e r he fe lt th a t th e band was a u th e n tic in th e ir m edia m ethods:"P ow er to th e p u b licity stunt. The o n ly reason it's so big is because th e y trie d to keep it so small."

Saturday's perform ance suggested th a t the m em bers o f Arcade Fire have kept a m ental note o.f all th e th in g s th e y w ished th e ir favourite art­ ists w o u ld d o and are d o in g it them selves. Call it evangelical benevolence o r m edia m a nip ula ­ tion , b u t I dare you n o t to dance. If you care to puzzle over th e religious nuances o f th e n ew al­ bum's title and lyrics, it may help to consider Di­ etrich Bonhoffer, Second W orld W ar protestant m inister and m a rtyr w h o once said: "The church is n o t th e church unless it exists fo r those w h o exist outside o f it."

Arcade Fire certa inly seems to exist for u s...a n d w e love th e m fo r it. The g ro u p is o ff to play a n o th e r five sold o u t shows in Judson M em orial Church, N ew York before heading o ff to Europe next w eek and there w ill be n o th in g secret a b o u t th e next tim e they're in to w n . A fter playing G lastonbury this sum m er, th e y w ill no d o u b t be loo king to fill th e Bell C e n tre ...o r at least Notre Dam e Cathedral. ■

Bible tour

(A b o v e ) R ic h a rd R e e d P a rry c u ttin g lo o s e w h ile p e r fo r m in g th e g ro u p 's la te st e ffo rts.

A rc a d e Fire's e c le c tic o r c h e s tr a tio n p ro v id e d e n e r g iz e d h o m e c o m in g s h o w s la st w e e k .

POP RHETORIC

R ejected al-Jazeera show lands on CBC p rim e tim e +

W

hen I first heard a b o u t CBC's n e w com edy, Little Mosque on the Prairie, I w as in trig u e d by th e idea: it sou nd ed b o th inte re stin g and controversial. A c o m e d y a b o u t M uslim s in Canada? W here w o u ld th e y take it? M aybe Shari'a cou rts in T o ro n to ... o r prayer spaces at universities? I c o u ld n 't resist.

U nfortun ately, w h a t was d escribed as a hilarious n e w series th a t w o u ld break d o w n racial stereotype's w as ac­ tu a lly a series o f p o o rly w ritte n jokes th a t w o u ld enforce th e m — th e m akings o f a m id-season FOX series w ith Charlie Sheen.

The show's p lo t revolves a rou n d a small M u slim c o m ­ m u n ity s tru g g lin g w ith a variety o f issues in a m o d e rn -d a y w estern society: ig n o ra n t to w n sfo lk, terrorism laws, debates a b o u t th e role o f th e sexes, conservative M uslim s in a c o n ­ te m p o ra ry s e ttin g and a rg u m e n ts over raising child re n in a n o n -M u slim cou ntry. How ever, th e fo rm a t o f th e sho w fails to live u p to th e possibilities o f th e plo t. Essentially, th e show consists o f one-liners th a t are dished o u t in q u ic k succes­ sion w ith th e h o p e th a t s o m e b o d y w ill laugh. N o b o d y did.

The sto rylin e operates arou n d three basic levels o f hu­ m our. For starters, th e re are jokes a b o u t saying "b o m b " in an a irp o rt, "flying w h ile Muslim ," b ein g b row n , co n n e ctio n s to al-Qaeda, and sleeper cells— w o rn o u t stereotypes a b o u t

■

p eo ple fro m th e M id d le East. A lo n g w ith p o k in g fu n at M us­ lim culture, th e v ie w e r is also sub jected to u n fu n n y jabs at W estern society: th e evils o f A m erican Idol as a "false idol," h o w W estern society is try in g to tric k M uslim s in to d rin k in g w ith phrases like "Rye bread" and “Liquorish" and w h y Des­ perate Housewives is an o xy m o ro n because w o m e n w h o are d o in g th e ir "sacred d u ty " as a w ife s h o u ld n 't be desperate.

The th ird level o f h u m o u r involves th e sho w b o m b a rd in g (or w a g in g j/h a d , as th e p ro d u ce r m ig h t say) th e vie w e r w ith b o rin g jests at T o ro nto and th e d iffic u ltie s o f m o vin g fro m a b ig c ity to rural Saskatchewan.

For th e creator o f th e show, Zarqa Nawaz, a Canadian M uslim o f Pakistani descent) th e c o n c e p t o f p o k in g fu n a t M uslim s isn't new. Q u ite evid en tly, a creator fa ilin g to live up to th e prom ise o f her CV is a staple o f a rtistic o r c o m e d ic fail­ ure. For som e on e w ith such extensive experience in FUNdam e n ta lis t Films (the nam e o f her p ro d u c tio n com pany), she really fails to live u p to her m o tto o f'p u ttin g th e 'fu n 'b a c k in fun da m e ntalism ."W ith all th e experience th a t she has u n d e r her hijab, e xp ectatio ns fo r h ig h q u a lity c o m e d y u n d o u b te d ­ ly exceeded her creative yield. R ather th a n in c lu d in g subtle puns and spins th a t w o u ld appeal to th e in te lle ctu a l c o m ­ m u nity, th e s h o w relies on w o rn , clich é -ru d d le d h um our.

The re latio nship b e tw e e n Islam and th e W estern w o rld

C ole R yan

is an in c re d ib ly c o m p le x and controversial subject, som e ­ th in g ripe fo r paro d y and fu ll o f p o te n tia l fo r q u ic k-to n g u e d q uips a b o u t im am s, Sunnis and Shi'ites and in te rp re ta tio n o f th e Qu'ran. If th e w riters in c lu d e d dee pe r th e m e s on to p o f th e lame, Corner Gas-like shtick, th e sho w w o u ld have a far greater appeal and c o u ld garner som e s u p p o rt w ith audiences w h o can read above a th ird -g ra d e level. Instead, having tu n e d in fo r th e firs t e pisode to see w h a t all th e c o n ­ troversy w as a bout, th e m a jo rity o f view ers (as sho w n by CBC's ratings) have tu rn e d o ff th e sho w a fte r d iscovering its sim ple, stale nature. N o t o n ly does a s h o w th a t th e CBC p itc h e d as c u ttin g -e d g e c o m e d y tre a t its view ers like Philis­ tines, b u t it also squanders a valuable fo ru m fo r edu ca tion , fo r b itin g satire o r in te llig e n t c o m m e n ta ry on b o th Islamic and W estern culture. Or w o u ld th a t be to o risqué!

W hen CBC aired th e first e pisode o f Little Mosque on the Prairie, Edward Said m u st have rolled over in his grave.

The p ro b le m clearly isn't in th e prem ise o f th e sho w — ra th ­ er w ith th e e xe cu tio n b ein g an u n h e a lth y c o m b in a tio n o f tam e, lam e and self-conscious. S tereotypes are overdone, th e jokes are b land and th e d e live ry is even w orse. M ost d is a p p o in tin g is th e u tte r banalization and o ve rsim p lifica ­ tio n o f a to p ic th a t c o u ld always b e n e fit fro m add itio na l, in fo rm e d in s ig h t... if n o t a little laugh. ■

13.02.07 «The McGill Tribune •15

FOOD

P r e v ie w s

Hello India! Goodbye cold!

An exotic eatery in the middle of the dow ntow n core spices up the w inter chill E m il y G e n n is C o m fo rt fo o d can take m any form s. For some, there's n o th in g m ore c o m fo rtin g d u rin g th e w in te r th a n escap­ ing th e frig id air and w a rm in g u p w ith som e nice hot, fra­ g ra n t Indian curries.Those lucky e n o u g h to g ro w up near Indian restaurants m ay re m e m be r c o m in g h om e fro m late exam stu d y sessions, o p e n in g th e ir fro n t d o o r and sm ell­ ing th e w o n d e rfu l arom as o fta k e o u t chicken tikka masala, malai kofta and navaratan korma.

Located on Stanley near th e corne r o f Ste-Catherine, A lio Inde is located in th e heart o f d o w n to w n . The a tm o ­ sphere is a refuge fro m th e loud c ity streets w ith a m in i­ m alist d écor th a t is u n im p o s in g and feels m ore casual and co m fo rta b le th a n th e d in in g room s o f m any o f th e o th e r posh restaurants in th e s u rro un din g area.The restaurant is q u ie t and spacious and has lots o f b oo th s w ith cushiony seats, m aking it a great e n v iro n m e n t fo r d in n e r am ong friends.

Meals at A lio Inde are best started w ith th e a ppetizer platter, w h ic h feeds ro u g h ly three people. The p la tte r c o n ­ sists o f veg eta ble bhaji (fritters), a m eat p a tty coated in frie d egg, a sausage and veg eta ble samosas. A lth o u g h a nice p a rt o f th e d in in g experience is to sam ple a restau­ rant's diverse offerings, ju s t o rd e rin g th e sausage a p p e ­ tizer w ill likely prove m ore rew arding and savoury. If you're a vegetarian, you'll p ro b a b ly be satisfied w ith th e bhaji, or th e o ld failsafe, samosas.

The m ain course can take som e tim e to arrive b u t is w o rth th e w ait. M y selection consisted o f lam b pasanda, b u tte r chicken, e g g p la n t bhaji, naan bread and rice. The e g g p la n t bhaji is clearly th e star o f th e meal and th e veg ­ etable dishes at A lio Inde generally have m ore interesting and subtle flavors tha n th e m eat dishes. The e g g p la n t is m ixed w ith spices and o th e r vegetables and cooked in its o w n juices. The m ixture o f spices is m ild and flavo urfu l

and th e te x tu re o f th e dish was soft b u t n o t mushy.

The lam b and chicken dishes are also tasty, b u t very rich and creamy, a p o te n tia l d ete rre n t fo r tho se W ho prefer m ore tra d itio n a l yog urt-ba sed curries over cream -based ones. It gives th e im pression th a t th e restaurant is try in g to d raw a clientele w h o is used to th e cream -based sauces o f French cuisine as o pp osed to sticking to tra d itio n a l Indian recipes. The cream y taste and texture also dulls th e o th e r flavours o f th e sauces.

For dessert the re was g u la b ja m u n (fried m ilk balls) and h o w can one tu rn d o w n so m e th in g as e xotic sou nd ­ ing as that? U nfortunately, th e dish does n o t have e no ug h fla v o u r to be as interesting as its nam e im plies. The cake­ like balls soaked in syrup needed a little extra push over th e e d g e — m ild spices, citrus extract, liqu o r— som e thin g to add m ore d e p th to th e fla vo u r and c u t th e sweetness.

The c h e f at A lio Inde is a friendly, jovia l m an fro m Madraj, in n o rth e rn India. He g la d ly gave us a to u r around th e kitchen and p ro u d ly p o in te d o u t th e tandoor, a cylin ­ drical oven used to m ake naàn and ta n d o o ri chicken in keeping w ith n o rth e rn Indian culin ary tra d itio n . The kitch ­ en does n o t have any vats o f prepared sauce to dish o u t a t a m o m en t's notice, w h ic h explains w h y lo n g e r w aits for fo o d are n o t u n co m m o n .

Fresh, savoury food, b u d g e t prices and casual a tm o ­ sphere make A lio Inde a real w in n e r a m on g a bevy o f m e­ diocre, overpriced d o w n to w n eateries. ■ 1422 Rue Stanley

Recommended Dishes: sausage appetizer, eggplant bhaji, sag panir, sag aloo, tandoori chicken.

Price Range: appetizer, $6 to $8; main course, $9 to $ 12; desert, $6 to $8.

When to Go: Try their lunch special for a discounted ver­ sion o f the dinner menu.

Wheelchair Access: A dozen stairs.

FOOD

Bring on the big cheese

Film. Bridge to Terabithia, opens Feb. 16 . Your favo urite ch ild h o o d fantasy com es to cin e m a tic life in th e form o f a Disney m ovie.

The film is based on K atherine Paterson's perennially praised children's novel a b o u t th e d e ve lo p in g frie n d sh ip b etw e en o u t­ siders Jesse Aarons Jr. and n e w -g irl-in -to w n Leslie.Burke and th e k in g d o m th e y create to escape d ista nt fam ilies and school b u l­ lies. Z o oe y Deschanel stars as th e m usic teacher th a t Jesse is infatuated w ith and w h o eventually, in a d ve rte n tly and fate fu lly breaks th e pair up. The second film version o f th e story, this m ovie has th e special effects a bili­ ties to recreate th e m agical k in g d o m o f Leslie and Jess in th e w ay its predeces­ sor c o u ld not. O f course, it cou ld never beat th e w o rld o u r fo u rth -g ra d e m inds im agined. An e n c h a n tin g tre a t nevertheless.

Theatre. Shakespeare for m y Father, Feb. 4 to 25 ; Saidye Bronfm an C entre o f th e A rts (5170 Côte-Ste-C atherine). Lynn Redgrave's p o w ­ erful and introspe ctive play a b o u t b ein g a p art o f an a ctin g dynas­ ty and her tro u b le d relationship w ith her a cto r father, Sir Michael, o pe ne d last w ee ke nd in a staging starring D o m in i Blythe. Blythe is a veteran Canadian actress, schooled at th e C entral School o f Speech and Drama w he re Lynn and Vanessa Redgrave, a long w ith Laurence Olivier, studied. Blythe is w ell-versed in Shakespeare, having been a lead m e m ­ ber fo r th e Stratford Festival here in Canada as w ell as fo r th e Royal Shakespeare C om pany in London and S tratford-upon-A von. She also p erfo rm e d th e Bard's w orks on Broadway u n d e r C hristo ph er Plum m er. For tickets and m ore info rm a ­ tio n call (514 ) 739-7944.

M usic. M obile, Feb. 23 at 8 p.m.; S pectrum (318 Ste-C atherine W.).

The in d ie -p o p band chu rn ed o u t th e consistent c h a rt-to p p e r "O ut o f M y Head" this sum m er and has been o ne o f th e m o st pop ula r acts recently o u t o f M ontreal, m o stly due to th e group's unique b le n d o f catchy, o ve rw h e lm in g d ru m m in g and snappy tunes.

O p e n in g fo r th e m are local band Mission D istrict and Uberko, a Q uebec City based electro p o p band.Tickets are $17 .50 . Call (514 ) 908-9090 to pre-purchase o r fo r m ore inform ation.

T h e a tre . Blue Light Burlesque a t the Haunted House, Feb. 13 to 15 at 8 p.m.; Maison Hantée (1037 Bleury).

The Blue L ig h t Burlesque C om pany's shows are a j|'l/n-(>a6<irvt ifw j far cry fro m a n y th in g you'd see on Ste-Cat's: th e ir f,t&oticth&laro-C&uiiJ » Ï5 xxm IpSBKI lias ts-wo-*-»» retro shows feature striptease artists in tasteful b»,«W»r ‘’«K Ijwjtheatrical and m usical acts, w o m e n and m en o f all shapes and sizes. Their audiences are encouraged to g e t them selves gussied u p in th e ir boas, fedora's and fancy dress to jo in in th e fun . T heir new est s h o w com es o u t this Valentine's w eek and prom ises to w arm u p th e w in te r chill w ith som e cabaret spice. Tickets are $23 fo r th e Tues­ day and Thursday shows and $50 fo r th e lavish Valentine's day d in n e r theatre experience on W ednesday n ig h t. For tickets and in fo rm a tio n call (514 ) 392-0004 ext. 0 .

9

Ghetto pizzeria Am elio's offers a cozy atm osphere and fresh eats K eren T a n g D espite 20 m in utes o f w a itin g in th e overcrow ded entra nce stairway, th e heat c o m in g fro m so m any people no lo n g e r fe lt w arm . Inside th e "fish b o w l" (yes, it does re­ m in d m e o f th e fish b o w l in Redpath library), peo ple w ere ch a tte rin g away, o b livio u s to o u r shivering presence as w e stared h u n g rily at th e ir steam ing pizzas and pressed our d ro o lin g faces against th e glass w in d o w .

Finally, after som e m ore delay, w e w ere seated rig h t next to th e brick-w all th a t so characterizes this basem ent

restaurant, w h ic h is like a "m om 'n' pop" shop and "th e ex­ te n d e d fam ily,"claim s one d in in g com p an ion . We glanced over and m arvelled a t th e ridiculously busy kitch en w ith an e ntire assem bly line packed tig h tly in to th e small space.

Increased efficiency, I suppose.

The e fficie n cy w as reflected in th e rate at w h ic h o u r fo o d arrived. W ith each pizza cam e a small b o w l o f salad, b u t unfortun ately, no bread. To sooth o u r ever-starving app etite, w e ordered garlic bread tha t, a lth o u g h it had far to o m u ch butter, w as fresh o u t o f th e oven and exactly w h a t w e needed to w a rm up. A fte r th e round o f a pp etiz­ ers, w e all ru m in ated on o u r e m p ty stom achs: "At least th e salad is inexpensive."

Am elio's has o th e r m ain courses in c lu d in g pasta, b u t since w e w ere at a pizza jo in t, it o n ly m ade sense to try o u t th e signature dish. For $8 .50 - 10.75 (small), you can g e t a d e c e n t meal, o r tw o . O u t o f o u r choices o f all-dressed, vegetarian and plain cheese, I w as surprised to fin d th a t I liked th e plain cheese th e best. The pizzas w ere very cheesy and som e o f th e pies w ere still d rip p in g fro m th e heat, b u t it was o u r table's consensus th a t the re th e y c o n ­ tain ed ju s t th e rig h t a m o u n t o f stuff.

Friends fro m th e U.S. o fte n co m p la in th a t one can no t fin d good pizza in th is to w n , at least n o t th e p ip in g h o t variety available in varying crust thicknesses and m u tlip le to p p in g c o m b in a tio n s in N ew York C ity o r Chicago. W hile th e convenience, atm o sph ere and pace at Am elio's does n o t com p are w ith an NYC corner shop, it is fair to say th a t here, th e fresh m aterial, u n iq u e to m a to sauce and the cozy liveliness com p en sate fo r w h a t is lacking. Indeed, if you are loo king sim p ly fo r som e "respectful pizza,"then it is ju s t around th e corne r in th e G hetto. ■

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R e v ie w s

COMPILED BY BEN LEMIEUX

Y outh G roup. Casino Twilight Dogs. A ro un d th e tu rn o f th e c e n tu ry (w e ll... m ille n n iu m , really), a verita ble plethora o f young, effervescent lads from . D ow n U nder w ere b e g in n in g to shine Up Over. Aussie bands like The Vines, th e John Butler Trio and Youth G roup breathed n e w life and creative spirit in to several rock subgenres; punk/garage, roots and indie, respectively. Y outh G roup in particular, after D eath Cab For Cutie's fro n tm a n Ben Gibbard's co n tin u o u s praise o f Skeleton Jar, th e ir s o p ho m o re effort, and o p p o rtu n ity to to u r th e U.S. extensively w ith th e latter, seem ed poised to set th e w o rld ablaze w ith th e ir th ird album . Casino Twilight Dogs, w he n considering th e e xpectations th a t surround it, is a resounding failure.

Casino Twilight Dogs is by no m eans an u tte rly atrocious album , it is m erely insipid and detached. W hereas Skeleton Jar had som e w in n in g , e m o tio n a lly and in stru m e n ta lly charged num b ers such as"S hadow lands"and th e e nergetic title -track, Youth Group's latest "e ffo rt” is like sonic valium . The a lb u m is awash in bland, u n e m o tio n a l vocal turns and lam e p oe tic attem pts, w h ile th e musical landscape o f th e alb u m rem ains m o n o to n o u s and, a t len g th , rem arkably tiresom e. In th e same vein as Nickelback's Chad Kroeger p ro d u cin g Theory o f a D eadm an (a band th a t is essentially a w a te re d -d o w n carbo n-co py o f his ow n), Death Cab's Chris Walla len d ing a hand w ith m ixing and p ro d u ctio n on Casino Twilight Dogs verges on th e narcissistic. His presence in th e s tu d io and c u ttin g room seems to have ro bb e d this prom isin g band o f its proverbial teeth, yield ing a d u d th a t o u g h t to have b e lo n g e d to a p re -pu be sce nt Death Cab. A t this p oin t, th e o n ly discernable difference b e tw e e n th e tw o bands is th a t o nly o ne a ctually appears to be m o vin g forw ard.

Barenaked Ladies. Barenaked Ladies Are Men. Barenakes Ladies are shit. As ever.

M ake your s p a c e

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■w McGill _ O c ilU

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D espite .its uninspired title , Music and Lyrics is an en­ joyable, accessible film — -though it is certa inly no m aster­ piece. As is th e case w ith nearly all ro m a n tic com edies, th e p lo t m anages to be sim ulta ne ou sly trite and inventive. In this case, th e in n o va tio n lies in th e in tro d u c tio n o f several deliciously p o p p y o riginal songs in th e film . Im ages e m ­ phasizing th e com m ercialism o f th e m usic in d u stry figu re p ro m in e n tly in th e story, a d d ing a fra ctio n o f m a tu re cred­ ib ility to this chick flick.

The p lo t fo llo w s a fo rm e r 1980 s p o p star (H ugh Grant)— w h o gets by headlin ing concerts at am usem en t parks, w h ile so m e h o w m a na gin g to rem ain handsom e, fina ncia lly stable and shockingly free o f substance abuse prob lem s— as he tries to w in back som e o f h is fo rm e rfa m e by w ritin g a h it fo r n y m p h e t p opstar Cora (Haley Bennett).

He is aided in his q uest by th e ch a rm in g cutie w h o tends his houseplants (D rew Barrymore) and has a hid d en lyrical ta le n t as w ell as— w h o cou ld have guessed???— a sim ilar­ ly hidden, u n se ttlin g story fro m th e past th a t she can no t q u ite set aside. That th e co-conspirators fall in love is no surprise, n or is th e ir subsequent fa llin g -o u t due to a rtistic differences. The storyline is hardly original, b u t its lack o f n ovelty does n o t c o m p le te ly sap it o f w o rth ; th e m ovie rem ains w atcha ble even th o u g h th e vie w e r has figu re d o u t h o w th e story w ill tu rn o u t by th e end o f th e o p e n in g credits.

The b ig g est p ro b le m w ith this m ovie is th e lack o f d e p th in all th e characters. The w riters seem to fo llo w th e prem ise th a t m ere ciphers (a has-been star, a p o p p rin ­ cess, an obsessive fan) p to vide th e audience w ith suffi­ c ie n t in fo rm a tio n a b o u t th e ir personalities. Barrym ore in p articular deserves a b e tte r character th a n S ophie Fisher, d o m e stic-h e lp -tu rn e d -p o p -co m p o se r. O ne doesn't have to be an arde n t fe m in is t to be h orrified by th e tre n d in ro­ m a ntic com edies th a t fem ale leads m u st be chatty, insu b ­ stantial and co m p le te ly lacking w h e n n o t accom panied by m ale counterparts. Sophie, quirky, perky and h aunted by a secret, appears vaguely in c o m p le te or u nform ed be-

WARNER BROS. PICTURES B a r r y m o r e — c h a rm in g e n o u g h to d e s e r v e b etter.

fore m e e tin g her m ale love interest; her role seems hardly m ore th a n a p o o rly designed cardboard im ita tio n o f Nata­ lie Portman's character Sam in th e 2004 film Garden State.

Nevertheless, if view ers can m anage to g e t past th e e xp licit stereotypes present in th e film , p eering into som eone else's relationship, even if it is o n ly a H ollyw o od account, is always a pleasant diversion. In h o n o u r o f Val­ entine's Day (or, alternatively, in h o n o r o f th e coldest, m ost horrendous m o n th o f th e year), it is w o rth setting aside a c o u p le hours fo r this m ovie. ■

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S ports

HOCKEY— REDMEN 2, CONCORDIA 2

Redmen settle for tie with Stingers McGill blows another lead with post-season looming Pa u l Sc h w a r tzm a n Slotted into' th e OUA East's th ird p osition instead o f c h a llen gin g fo r first and conning o ff a b e a td o w n at th e hands o f O ttaw a, th e Redmen looked a little rattled in Friday's tilt against th e ir cross-tow n rivals.

Taking p a rt in th e 20 th e d itio n o f th e Corey C up— th e C oncordia-M cG ill challenge tro p h y nam ed fo r fo rm e r M ontreal Canadiens president, Ronald Corey— th e Redmen b le w a 2-0 advan­ tage, yet still m anaged to retain possession o f th e prize, salvaging a 2-2 tie.

The Stingers, still fig h tin g fo r th e ir p la yoff lives, m enaced th e ir o p p o n e n ts and w ere clearly buoyed by th e raucous, partisan Ed M eagher Arena cro w d as th e y played a to u g h 60 m inutes o f desperation hockey.

"We played a d e te rm in e d team tonight,"said McGill head coach M a rtin Raymond. "Concordia played strong th ro u g h o u t th e gam e and th e y fo u g h t hard to earn th e point."

Despite b eing o u t-s h o t 11-8 in th e o p e n in g fram e, McGill was first to fin d th e back o f th e net, scoring at 10:50 o f th e o p e n in g perio d th a n ks'to a ta p e -to -ta p e pass fro m M athieu Leclerc to d riv­ ing line m ate Teddy Kyres w h o slipped th e puck b e h ind C oncordia g o a lte n d e r Sheldon Baerg.

"I was ju s t g o in g hard to th e n e t and he fed m e a nice pass," Kyres said. "T hat’s ju s t part o f m y gam e. I'm ready to d o w ha te ver it takes to help this team win."

F ilia tra u lt h o ld s th e fo rt

However, in th e second fram e, th e Redmen to o k fo u r penalties, c o n tin u a lly sending C on­ cordia o n to th e pow er-p la y in c lu d in g a 5-o n -3 advantage. In ju s t his te n th gam e this season, Jean-M ichel Filiatrault m ade a strong b id for g e t­ tin g a start in th e playoffs w ith tim e ly saves w he n McGill needed him most.

"We're g iv in g aw ay to o m any chances and w e sh o u ld n 't have acted th e w ay w e did,” Ray­ m o n d said. "M aybe I should've co m p la in e d m ore th o u g h because w h e n I fina lly did, th e calls finally started to go o u r way."

Even w h ile spe nd ing m u ch o f th e period in th e sin bin, th e Redm en tallied again as Shawn

Shew chuk e xte nd ed his p o in t scoring streak to seven games, n o tc h in g his 10 th goal o f th e sea­ son. A fte r takin g a pass fro m defensem an Dave U rquhart, S hew chuk skated to th e hashmarks u n to u ch e d and rifled a w ris t sho t past Baerg.

C oncordia fina lly m anaged g e t a p uck by Filiatrault as th e Stingers scored a d em oralizing goal w ith ju s t 1:15 rem a inin g in th e period. W ith Ken M orin in th e box fo r hoo kin g, Jason Beliveau scored his 11 th on a re bo u nd o ff a sho t by Remi Tremblay. M o m e n tu m had clearly shifted as th e chants o f "Let's g o Stingers" w ere ru m b lin g th ro u g h o u t th e packed crow d, spurring on a C oncordia com eback.

E n d -to -e n d a c tio n in th e th ird

The Stingers, n eeding at least a tie in orde r to keep th e ir p la y o ff hopes alive, cam e o u t strong in th e final perio d as McGill lapsed in to a defensive shell, try in g to preserve th e ir lead. In th e end, the Stingers c a u g h t a lucky breakas D m itriT oupikov's slapshot d eflected o ff McGill's Ken M orin as it fle w past Filiatrault to tie th e gam e at 2 - 2 .

W hile th e Stingers kep t p o u rin g it on to steal th e extra p oint, Filiatrault m anaged to keep th e g am e k n o tte d at tw o apiece as th e McGill n e t m in d e r m ade 31 saves in c lu d in g a n u m b e r o f spectacular stops late.

A fter th e to rrid pace o f regulation, in w hich th e tw o team s co m b in e d fo r 57 shots and 17 p ow er-play o p p o rtu n itie s, b o th sides had n o th ­ ing left in th e ta n k fo r th e extra fram e. The five m in u te o ve rtim e p rod u ce d o n ly one sho t and ended th e challenge c u p gam e w ith a disap­ p o in tin g tie.

McGill co n clu d e d th e w eekend and th e ir regular season w ith a n o th e r 2 -2 draw, this tim e against th e U niversity o f Q uebec at Trois-Rivières.

T h ou gh th e final standings had already been decided, th a t d id n 't sto p th e gam e fro m being an e n te rta in in g affair, capped by B enoit M artin scoring w ith nine seconds left to force OT. The Redmen w ill b egin th e playoffs at h o m e on W ednesday n ig h t against th e Stingers, w h o fin ­ ished fifth overall in th e OUA's East region. McGill w ill be try in g to reach th e CIS C ha m pio nsh ip — in M o ncton , N.B.— fo r th e second consecutive sea­ LUKAS BERGMARK son and need to g e t past th e ir c ity rivals to even M c G ill a n d C o n c o r d ia g e t u p c lo s e a n d p e r s o n a l in 2 0 th e d itio n o f th e C o re y C u p . th in k a b o u t th e trip to th e M aritim es. ■

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purist to th e b itte r end, I can't em brace th e s h o o to u t in m y beloved NHL. N everm ind th a t this o ne -o n -o n e duel is a b e a u tifu lly disguised A m ericanTrojan horse to fu rth e r infiltra te hockey's u p p e r echelons in order to "sex up" th e g am e fo r th e passionate, a lb e it unexcited, fans in th e icy D eep South. Forget th a t som e are even con sid e ring scrap­ p in g th e Stanley C up playoff's u n lim ite d o ve rtim e rule in fa­ v o u r o f a s h o o to u t system. The p rim a ry reason to despise this hockey a berration is its de-em phasis o f th e "team," reducing a s p o rt o f five-against-five to one o f ind ividu al p erfo rm a nce — after all, Am ericans adore baseball and basketball, th e classic superstar-centred sports cloaked as team games.

S hootouts sim ply aren't hockey; they're pure flash.

So w h y d o som e insist on regulating these anom alies as if th e y w ere tru e adherents to hockey's spirit and law? We th re w o u t th e hockey geist and ru leb oo k w h e n th a t p ost-lockou t deal was co m p le te d w ith Lucifer B ettm an at th e helm ; th e NHL and m any hockey "realists" d re w a line in th e sand and hunkered d o w n on th e side o f glitz, in d iv id u a lity and Florid­ ian TV ratings. But if pure exhilaration was elevated over th e natural, p ro p e r a ttrib u te s o f th e gam e, it is grossly hypocritical oh th e p a rt o f NHL executives and hockey com m e n ta to rs to try to assign seem ingly e xc ite m e n t-h in d e rin g rules to these sho oto uts and cry fou l w h e n envelopes are pushed.

Last Saturday n ig ht, after re gu latio n and o ve rtim e proved inconclusive in a Boston Bruins-N ew York Islanders clash, fans

w ere treated to e ig h t and a h alf rounds o f"d a z zlin g "sh o o to u t fu n u n til h ulking Bruins b lu e lin e r Zd en o Chara finished th e m arathon w ith a fake slapshot fo llo w e d by a feathered ta p th ro u g h Rick DiPietro's five-hole. Before Chara— w h o to o k his first ever a tte m p t— sent th e fans hom e, th e last five p a rtic i­ pants fo r b o th team s w ere Randy Robitaille, PetrTenkrat, Jeff Tam bellini, P.J. Axelsson and Tom Poti— hardly a M urderer's Row o f snipers. The NHL sho oto uts are g u id e d by th e inane rule th a t once a player has shot, th e e ntire rest o f th e n o n ­ g o a lte n d in g line -u p m u st make an a tte m p t before th e first player is allo w ed a second crack at an u ncon tested break­ away.

To all those w h o w a n te d a s h o o to u t fo rm a t back in 2004 , please d o n 't try to m aintain this façade o f true, tea m -o rie nte d hockey. You already sold o u t th e "te a m "fo r e xcitem e nt ancTindividualism . If it's all a b o u t panache and pizzazz, I w a n t to see Boston's Patrice Bergeron sho ot fo u r tim es o r th e Islanders' Jason Blake dan gle fo r a goal even th o u g h he ju s t w e n t th e round before; I d o n 't need to see PJ. Axelsson, u n q u e stio n ­ ably a fantastic pen alty killer, fire a talentless w ris t shot in to th e goalie's b elly or miss th e n et entirely. If Pittsburgh's play­ ing, let Sidney Crosby take every single s h o o to u t a tte m p t— w o u ld th a t n o t m axim ize excitem ent? I d o n 't th in k th a t th e fans are w a tc h in g TV to see D o m in ic M oore, no m a tte r h o w fam ous his b ro th e r Steve has becom e.

A t this past W orld Jun ior C ham pionship, th e sem i-final

A aron S igal

m atch b e tw e e n Team.Canada and th e U nited States d e g e n ­ erated in to th e dreaded sho o to u t, this tim e d e cid in g w h o w o u ld have a chance to play fo r gold. A ccording to IIHF rules, after th e first three rounds, a player can be used an u n lim ite d n u m b e r o f tim es. This allo w ed Canada's Jonathan Toews to score on all three o f his a tte m pts, leading th e Canucks past th e Am ericans. Yet, on th e hom e fro n t and in th e U.S., hockey fans w ere up in arms, scream ing th a t in th e team gam e o f hockey, neithe r th e gam e nor th e s h o o to u t should be d ecid ­ ed on th e shoulders o f one player. A m I m issing som ething? If we're g o in g to stress th e superstars, th e n le t th e m play. D on 't m aintain som e con trived re gu latio n to preserve th e sanctity o f th e team w h e n substance has already been sacrificed on th e altar o f style.

Earlier this season, Ducks w in g e r Ryan Shannon a tte m p t­ ed— and a lm ost c o m p le te d — a spin-o-ram a goal against ' Dallas's M artyT urco.T he day after, hockey's self-anointed NHL "p ro te cto rs"co m p la in e d th a t th e spin should be o u tla w e d in th e s h o o to u t because a player, d u rin g a gam e, is n o t a llow ed to stop his m o m e n tu m on a p en alty shot. C om e on people!

Let players try spin-o-ram as in shootouts; let th e m take full laps o f th e ice to b uild up speed before p icking u p th e p uck at centre; let th e m th ro w th e puck up w ith th e ir gloves and try to b at it o u t o f th in air in to th e net. Let th e m s h o o t six tim es in th e same sho oto ut. Or b e tte r yet,Jet th e m g o back to ties. ■

The McGill Tribune

1 8 -S p o rts-13.02.07

BASKETBALL— MARTLETS 59, CONCORDIA 54

SHOOTING OUT THE LIGHTS

No more locker room Snickering

Martlets snap three-game skid McGill comes from behind to down Concordia '«k»

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Looking to end a losing streak and gain som e tra ctio n in a fierce b at­ tle fo r a p la y o ff s p o t in th e tig h t Q ue­ bec C onference, th e McGill M artlets entered Friday night's con test against th e C oncordia Stingers in need o f a big perfo rm a nce fro m a leader. On th a t n ig h t, th e shortest player on th e c o u rt gave th e m a giant-sized effort.

C hristine Kennedy, a d im in u tiv e 5'3 " so p h o m o re p o in t guard, scored a g a m e -h ig h 21 p oin ts as McGill eked o u t a 59-54 v ic to ry over th e ir cross­ to w n rivals at Love C o m p e titio n Hall on Friday.

Kennedy sho t 8-fo r-i 3 fro m th e field, in c lu d in g an im pressive 4 -for5 fro m b eyon d th e arc and finished th e gam e o ne p o in t shy o f m a tch in g a career-high p o in t tota l she set ju s t over three weeks ago.

"C hristine is e m e rg in g as a leader ■for us," said head coach Ryan Thorne.

"I th in k she has w orke d hard on her gam e to b ecom e a c o m p le te player.

W hereas last year she cou ld o n ly p e n ­ etrate, n o w she's sho w in g th e a bility to knock d o w n thre e -p o in te rs and th a t makes her a to u g h player to d e ­ fend."

The p o in t guard n otche d 16 o f her 2 i p oin ts in th e second half, in ­ c lu d in g an early th ird q u a rte r three p o in te r th a t gave th e M artlets a lead th a t th e y w o u ld never relinquish. The basket was p art o f an 11-0 run after half-tim e th a t saw C oncordia g o over seven m in utes w ith o u t a p oint.

"This was a huge gam e for us," Kennedy said. "Everyone was playing so w ell in th e post th a t I m anaged to g e t som e o pe n looks up to p and m o st o f th e m w ere ju s t g o in g in fo r me.”

K ee p ing pace a fte r to u g h s ta rt The M artlets looked sluggish

early, falling b eh ind 18-8 in th e first q ua rte r and finished th e first h alf tra iling by a score o f 31 - 28 . That d e fi­ c it surely w o u ld have been greater w ere it n o t fo r th e inspired early play o f guard Vanessa Danisi, w h o had 11 p oin ts in th e first h alf and finished th e g am e w ith a season-high 14 .

"W e always m atch u p w ell against Concordia," Danisi said. "They respect o u r a b ility to pen etra te and d rive to th e hoop, so th a t gives us som e o pe n shots outside. That's w he re I was able to h it m y shots and th a n k fu lly w e cam e away w ith a very b ig win."

The w in p rop e lle d th e M artlets in to second place in th e QSSF, w here o n ly fo u r poin ts separate second fro m fifth spot. The to p fo u r team s w ill qua lify fo r th e regional playoffs at th e end o f February and McGill hopes to avoid a first-ro un d series against p ow erho use Laval, w h o have already clinche d first place.

"W e have to play a b e tte r insideo u t g am e d o w n th e stretch if w e w a n t to finish in second,"Thorne said. "A lot o f team s have seen th a t if th e y play zone defence on us th e y have a b e t­ te r chance o f w in n in g because th e y have a b e tte r chance to g e t help. O ur guards are so d yn a m ic th a t there are very fe w team s w h o cou ld m a tch -u p in m a n-to -m a n coverage against us.

That's w h y w e've g o t to make sure w e m ove th e ball w ell and g e t it inside, so w e d o n 't ju s t settle fo r th re e -p o in t shots." .

The M artlets closed o u t th e ir w ee ke nd w ith a to u g h 64-60 loss to th e UQAM Citadins, w h o McGill n ow find s itself tie d for second place. Nathifa Weekes had 21 poin ts and three steals in a losing cause. Qn Friday, th e M artlets travel to Bishop's fo r a no th er gam e w ith massive p la yoff im p lica ­ tio n s and th e n finish th e ir season at h o m e against Laval one w eek later. ■

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om osexu ality and sports have always been a co m b u s tib le pairing, a fa ct proven this w eek on tw o separate occasions. The first occurred at th e Super B ow l— n o t d u rin g th e g am e itse lf b u t in a com m ercial. A Snickers ad show ed tw o m ale car m echanics c h o m p in g d o w n on e ith er end o f a candy bar leading to an im p ro m p tu kiss. This was fo llo w e d by b o th realizing th e y had ju s t c o m m itte d a hom osexual a ct (god forbid), quickly agreeing to "do so m e th in g m anly" to o ffset th e ir awkwardness and proce ed ing to tear th e ir chest hair out.

I am n o t g o in g to p retend to be th e e n lig h t­ ened academ ic w h o recoiled and d id n 't laugh w h e n I saw th e ad. But in o u r hyper-sensitized w o rld and by nature o f it b ein g a g lo rifie d "Super Bowl Ad", broadcast to m illio ns o f people, it deserves a second look.

The tw o stra ig h t characters are stereotypically to u g h , b lu e -colla r car m echanics because, as every­ one knows, the re are no gay grease m onkeys— h o ­ mosexuals are to o busy c u ttin g hair and sprucing up houses, d o n 't you know . W hen th e y accidentally lock lips after sharing an u n d o u b te d ly dele cta ble Snick­ ers bar, th e fu n begins; if you tu rn e d on th e te le v i­ sion im m e d ia te ly post-kiss you p ro b a b ly th o u g h t one o f th e m had been diagnosed w ith cancer or th e ir m o m had died by th e ir reactions. In th e m id st o f th e e m o tio n a l nuclear b o m b th a t had ju s t been d eton ate d, th e y d ecide th a t rip p in g o u t chest hair in a d e m o n stra tio n o f "m anliness" is th e o n ly recourse.

It seem ed th e m en w ere th in k in g , "W hoosh, th a t was a close call. We a lm ost becam e gay. Thank g od w e to re o u t o u r hair to a ffirm o ur heterosexuality."

It gets w orse.There w ere alternate endings p ost­ ed on th e Snickers W eb site (quickly rem oved after th e negative fee db ack o f th e television ads) along w ith reactions fro m Indianapolis C olts and C hicago Bears players w a tc h in g th e com m ercials. The p e o ­ ple a t Snickers a pp aren tly th o u g h t th a t rip p in g o u t b o d y hair was p ro b a b ly to o lo w on th e m a nly scale, so in a n o th e r conclusion, th e m echanics step it u p a

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n o tc h — one chugs m o to r o il and th e o th e r reaches fo r som e blue liqu id th a t looks like anti-freeze as b o th scream in agony.

In th e Colts cut, a c o u p le o f players fro m th e Super Bowl cham ps are sho w n w a tc h in g th e ad.

The reactions on th e p a rt o f th e players are p rice­ less. Aside fro m th e o b lig a to ry "A w w w , helll no," w e see th e players recoil in h orro r at th e th o u g h t o f tw o m en kissing. It is as if th e ir brain has sto p p e d fu n c ­ tio n in g because th e y are so stunned. The eyes o f o ur role m odels g o blank.

W ith its com m ercials and th e extra o n lin e c o n ­ te n t, Snickers effectively exposed tw o messages: th e first b eing th a t seem ing gay is e q u iva le n t to smash­ ing y o u r b o d y u n d e r th e h oo d o f a car (another al­ terna te e n d in g ) and th e second is th a t sports and hom o se xua lity a bsolutely d o n o t m ix— one is mas­ culine and virtuous, one is fe m in in e and unnatural.

These points w ere reaffirm ed later in th e w eek w h e n fo rm e r NBA player John A m aechi cam e o u t in an a u to b io g ra p h y d etailin g his struggles as a clos­ eted hom osexual in th e very anti-gay e n v iro n m e n t o f professional sports. A fe w te llin g quotes by play­ ers snuck by th e calculated responses force-fed by team executives. Shavlick R andolph o f th e Philadel­ phia 76 ers was acce pting in a way, co n ce d in g that, "As lon g as you d o n 't b ring you r gayness on me, I'm fine.'' Even LeBron James, king o f th e NBA, gave his tw o -c e n ts w orth :"Y o u take showers tog eth er, you're on th e bus, you talk a b o u t things," James said. "W ith team mates, you have to be tru stw o rth y . If you're gay and you're n o t a d m ittin g th a t you are, you're n o t trustw orthy."

Does this really surprise anyone? Sports are based around th e m asculine ideal and are steeped in tra d itio n — it is a haven fo r purists and conserva­ tives w h o react v io le n tly to any ty p e o f change, be it on o r o ff th e field. The hom osexual stereotype c o n ­ flicts w ith this, th o u g h you w o u ld th in k A m aechi, a 6'io", 270 p o u n d b e h e m o th , w o u ld cause fo r som e doubts. ■

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13.02.07 •Sports •19

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M arlets s h o c k e d in O ttaw a

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McGill

14

1

0

0

28

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5

3

3

40

Laval

13

5

44

22

Ottawa

10

5

0

0

20

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17 15

7

5

1

36

Montreal

12

6

40

27

26 18

Carleton

4

11 0

0

8

Ottawa

11

12

3

2

27

Sherbrooke

7

11

29

36

14

Concordia

2

11 0

2

6

Concordia

8

16 3

1

20

McGill

0

18

5

54

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I O N DECK M en's Ice H o c k e y — C o n c o rd ia S tin g e rs a t M cG ill R e d m e n ; W e d n e sd a y , 7 p m ., M c C o n n e ll A re n a

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BOX SCORE Friday, Feb. 9,2007 McGill R edm en 2 vs. C oncordia Stingers 2 Ed M eagher Arena SCORING SUMMARY FIRST PERIOD: 1. McGill - Teddy Kyres 7 (M. Leclerc, J. Burgess) -1 0:5 0

McGill begins th e post-season against a fam iliar foe in rival I ; Concordia. W hile th e Redm en w ere d o m in a n t at tim es against | | th e Stingers— such as th e 7-2 w in on Carnival N ig h t— th e y have also looked q u ite pedestrian and undisciplined. McGill I was th e b e tte r te a m in th e standings, b u t it still w ill have to I break its recent h ab it o f takin g m u ltip le penalties as w ell as h op e on som e strong play fro m tw o -tim e OUA player o f th e year, M athieu Poitras.

W o m en's Ice H o c k e y — O ttaw a G e e -G e e s at M cG ill M a rt­ lets; S a tu rd a y , 7:30 p.m ., M c C o n n e ll A re n a

I : The M artlets suffered tneir first QSSF loss o f th e season last w eek I w h e n th e y fell 2-1 in Saturday's clash against th e same O tta w a | side. Even th o u g h th e y re b o u nd ed against C arleton on Sunday, j th e girls in red and w h ite w ill be loo king fo r som e re trib u tio n 1 this w eek w h e n th e y take on th e Gee-Gees. Look for a ll-w o rld | sto p pe r Charlene Labonte and sniper Vanessa Davidson to lead th e charge as th e squad hopes to stay sharp heading in to the post-season and exact a little revenge at th e same tim e.

SECOND PERIOD: 2. McGill - Shawn Shewchuk9 (D. Urquhart, LS Allaire) -1 4:2 3 (PP) 3. Concordia - Jason Beliveau 11 (R.Tremblay, S.P. Sauve) -18:45 (PP) THIRD PERIOD: 4. Concordia - Dmitri Toupikov 4 (S.P Sauve) - 7:47

GOALTENDERS: McGill: Jean-M ichel Filiatrault (T, 6-2-2; 2GA, 31 saves, 60:00) Concordia: S heldon Baerg (T, 4-4-1; 2GA, 23 saves, 60:00)

SHOTS BY PERIOD TOT: 1 2 3 4 - Total 11 A fte r sp littin g this past w eekend's gam es w ith C oncordia and j McG: 5 9 11 0 - 25 UQAM, McGill sits second in th e QSSF a t 6-8 w ith tw o gam es j Con: 9 12 11 1 - 3 3 j j to play. However, w ith ju s t fo u r poin ts separating th e M artlets j fro m last-placed C oncordia and final w eek s h o w d o w n w ith PENALTIES (N o7 Mins.): I th e to p -ran ke d Laval side on th e horizon, th e M artlets n e e d ! McG: 12/24 I j to buckle d o w n in this first o f th e ir last tw o contests. Led by j Con: 7/14 I Q uebec leading scorer N athifa Weekes and C hristine Kennedy, I j McGill has all th e tools to m ake a run. It's n o w a m a tte r o f ex ? e cuting.

SACK OF THE WEEK T h is w eek's w in n e r - Bill S im m o n s, c o lu m n is t for ESPN.com's P a g e 2

C om in g in to this gam e are tw o ice cold squads, w ith Avs losers j o f fo u r o f th e ir last five and th e Flames losing fo u r straig ht— j This one pains me. Bill S im m ons is one o f th e best sportsI ! w ith tw o s h o o to u t losses. N orm ally, w e d o n 't h ig h lig h t team sp I ! w riters o u t the re today, p e n n in g a u niq ue and h ab itu ally hi­ th a t aren't playing th a t strong rig h t now , b u t this gam e also | l l larious c o lu m n representing th e fan's perspective on sports by serves a purpose to s h o w h o w s tu p id th e "N ew N H L'schedul- I? c o m b in in g p o p cultu re references and deep s p o rtin g kn o w lI I ing is. The tw o squads w ill m e e t in C algary earlier in th e w eek j | | edge. He has always stressed th a t he's n o t y o u r con ven tio na l " on Thursday and th e n again nextTuesday— this tim e in Denver. J jou rn alist, o fte n preferring M axim parties and ragers in Vegas ? Yes, th e Flames w ill play th e Avs in three stra ig h t games. Any-1 over th e sports e ve nt he is covering. ! one else see a p ro b le m here?

But this past w eek in M iam i, th e Sports Guy w e n t a b it IJ to o fan Sent on ESPN's d olla r to cover th e Super Bowl and th e 56th A n n u a l N B A A ll-S ta r G a m e — East vs. W est fro m L as week's events p receding it, S im m ons seem ingly h it every V e g a s ; S u n d a y at 8 p .m .. T h e S co re I t party, ce le b rity g athe rin g o r vide o gam e release near South Norm ally, w e d o n 't endorse these gam es— the y're essentially!

Beach. He ju s t left o u t o ne m ajor e ve nt in his itinerary— th e f j offensive sh o w d o w n s w ith little -to -n o defence to be seen.

Super Bowl. The Sports G uy revealed this w eek th a t he had !: However, aside fro m th e usual display o f huge play and alley-1 || n o t posted a co lu m n a b o u t his hated Colts (he is a d ie hard I J oops, there is som e reason to w a tch this gam e. Starting fo r th e Pats fan) w in n in g th e Super Bowl because he had skipped o u t I J East at p ow er forw a rd is none o th e r tha n T o ro nto Raptors su- j * o f M iam i Super Bowl Sunday m orn ing .

I j perstar Chris Bosh, w ho's in th e m id st o f th e best year o f his j Sports Guy, you m ay n o t have had a tick e t (a ltho ug h career. Also, tw o -tim e MVP Steve Nash hs been p ro m o te d to j ESPN.com p ro b a b ly w o u ld 'v e hooked you up) and I kno w I starting five. you've been to th e big g am e before, b u t for m o st fans, th e Super Bowl experience is one- o f those "once-in-a-lifetim es." | j C ou ldn 't you have stayed in M iam i d u rin g th e gam e, even if B O X SCORE f l H H j j m i you d id n 't attend, ju s t so th e rest o f us w h o can't afford th e Saturday. Feb. 10,2007 tim e o r m o n e y to g o to th e Super Bowl cou ld g a th e r a tid ­ O tta w a Gee-Gees 2 vs. McGill M artlets 1 b it fro m th e experience? For" a g u y w h o claim s to represent U niversity o f O tta w a Sports C om plex th e average fan's perspective, you cam e o u t loo king as a tru e |. spo rtsw rite r on this o n e — and a p o o r one at that.

SCORING SUMMARY FIRST PERIOD: 1. O ttaw a - Kim Kerr (unassisted) 07:57 (SH)

M cG ill sy n c h ro n iz e s w ith g o ld

Jennifer G ill-W ilson and Vanessa Foucher each w o n a pair o f g o ld medals as McGill captured its th ird consecutive Gerry D u b ru le T ro p h y as cha m pio ns o f th e C anadian U niver­ sity Synchro Swim League at Saturday's final in W aterloo, ON. G ill-W ilson finished first o f e ig h t c o m p e tito rs in th e solo ro u ­ tine, th e n tea m ed up w ith A m i Feige to take to p s p o t in th e d u e t routine. Foucher w o n th e novice solo ro u tin e and later paired w ith M arion Turner to w in th e novice d u e t routine.

In ju ry sq u a s h e s M a rtle ts' d re a m s o f g o ld

S econd-seeded W estern O ntario to o k advantage o f a late inju ry to McGill's n u m b e r-tw o seed Carly H ong and upset th e favoured M artlets 4 -2 to w in th e O ntario U niversity A th ­ letics w om en's squash c h a m p io n sh ip at M cM aster University on Saturday. The M ustangs reached th e final after narrow ly d efea ting T oronto on a second tie-breaker in th e sem i-final.

McGill q ua lified after d o u b lin g up Queen's 4 - 2 . In a dram atic fifth and d ecidin g set against McGill, H ong w e n t d o w n w ith an unspecified injury, w h ic h forced th e star to w ith d ra w , g iv ­ ing H eather Lam b th e gam e and W estern th e Lillian D'Urzo plaque as OUA w om en's cham ps fo r th e second stra ig h tye a r and 10 th tim e in school history.

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GOALS BY PERIOD TOT: 1 2 3 4 - Total McG: 1 1 0 0 - 2 Con: 0 1 1 0 - 2

W om en's B a s k e tb a ll— B ishop's G a ite rs at M cG ill M a rtle ts; Friday, 6 p .m ., L o ve C o m p e titio n Hall

N H L — C o lo ra d o A v a la n c h e at C a lg a r y F la m e s ; S atu rd a y, 10 p .m ., P e n g ro w th S a d d le d o m e , C B C

Gee-Gee A m b e r Foster snapped a 1-1 tie at 12:27 o f th e th ird p eriod and Julie Lalonde m ade 41 saves as unranked O ttaw a p ulle d o ff a stu n n in g upset w ith a 2-1 shocker over top -ra n ke d McGill in w om en's hockey on Saturday. The vic­ to ry snapped th e Gee-Gees seven-gam e losing streak to th e M artlets and it was McGill's first loss o f th e season, e nd ing a 25 - 0-1 undefeated record against Canadian university o p ­ ponents, d a tin g back to a loss against Laurier at th e N ation ­ als last spring. The M artlets held a 41-30 edge in shots b u t w e n t o-for-8 on th e p o w e r play. It was th e first career loss for Canadian O lym p ic g o a lte n d e r C harline Labonté w h o fell to 13 - 1-0 in league play and 24 - 1-1 against CIS o pp on en ts. Kim Kerr had given th e Gee-Gees a 1-0 lead in th e o p e n in g period w h e n she inte rcep ted Labonté's pass a tte m p t and scored sho rtha n de d in to a vacated net. Rookie Alyssa Cecere tied th e score fo r McGill m id w a y th ro u g h th e final period.

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FITNESS— SWISS BALL LEG CURL If you w a n t to stren gth en you r ham string and g lu ’ teus muscles, a great exercise is th e "Swiss ball leg c u rl! j The o n ly apparatus this exercise requires is a g ia n t Swiss j ball, a useful and m u ltifu n c tio n a l piece o f e q u ip m e n t th a t m any trainers inco rp orate in to th e ir program s.

To b egin th e exercise, start by lying d o w n on y o u r I back and place y o u r calves and heels on th e ball. For j b e tte r balance, keep y o u r arm s fla t on th e flo o r beside J you r torso. Now, exte nd you r hips in an upw ard m o tio n , j liftin g you r low er back and g lu teu s fro m th e flo o r and j th e n stabilize yo u rse lf Keep this positio n fo r a b o u t five | seconds. If this is to o easy, th e n you can increase th e j level o f d iffic u lty by rolling th e ball tow ards y o u r gluteus j w ith you r heels and th e n roll th e ball back to its initial j position. D uring th e w h o le exercise, you w a n t you r low e r back and g lu teu s o ff th e flo o r; o n ly th e legs are : in m o ve m e n t w h ile th e a b d o m in a l area is fixed. Repeat th e m o ve m e n t a fe w tim es and d o n 't fo rg e t to breathe. ; If th e exercise is to o d iffic u lt, start by practicing your bal■ance, thu s gradually increasing th e tim e you keep your j upw ard position. #1

-M a g d a Gonçatves Baptista (PTS)

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