McAlester Living Fall 2017

FALL 2017

McAlester living Foodie at Heart

Some fall-friendly recipes for home

“Dream Girls” reminisce on their lifelong friendship

ONCE A BUFFALO McAlester grads enjoy longtime friendships

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McAlester living NEWS-CAPITAL NEWS EDITOR

Adrian O’Hanlon iii EDITORIAL DESIGNER

Marsha Erwin STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER

Kevin Harvison MANAGING EDITOR

James Beaty EDITORIAL STAFF

Lacey Sudderth Allyson Gregory SPECIAL CONTRIBUTORS

Amy Johns Heather Scott ADVERTISING STAFF

Reina Owens Connie Poole Jana Weddle K atina Legg

Photo provided by Heather Scott LaMon Photography

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fall 2017

CONTENTS

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ONCE A BUFFALO

FRIENDS IN SONG

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36

SUPERFRIENDS

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KINDNESS CHAIN

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DREAM GIRLS

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PROMOTING LOVE & KINDNESS

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“ I T WA S J UST A GR E AT T I M E G E T T I NG E V E RY BO DY T O G E T H E R AGA I N A N D I HOPE W E CA N M A K E I T A NO T H E R 1 0 Y E A R S ,” — RYA N OW E N S

ONCE A BUFFALO:

McAlester grads enjoy longtime friendships, watching Sooners beat Ohio State

By Adrian O’Hanlon III | News Editor

S

ooners quarterback Baker Mayfield grabbed a large OU flag and ran around Ohio Stadium in Columbus, Ohio, on Sept. 9 before spiking it into the turf at midfield

“We thought it was awesome,” Ryan Owens said of Mayfield planting the flag. “We had just stepped down when he planted the flag and all the Ohio State fans were screaming ‘he planted the flag on our 50 yard line.’”

Not everyone in the group of longtime McAlester friends — including Owens, Matt Albright, Rodney Alles, Matt McDaniel, Nathan Stipe and Michael Wynn — could attend the game, but they all shared the moment with each other afterward.

Owens said the group thought the Sooners had a chance to win before the game, but they didn’t believe it 100 percent until about midway through the third quarter.

“We were kind of in awe,” Ryan Owens said. “It was shocking and 100 percent pure intensity.”

to punctuate then-fifth-ranked Oklahoma’s dominant 31-16 upset win against No. 2 Ohio State.

The scene shocked the college football world as Oklahoma proved to be a national title contender and people both praised and criticized Mayfield metaphorically staking his claim of the stadium.

But for a group of friends that grew up in McAlester and attended the University of Oklahoma together, watching the game — and Mayfield’s celebration — together in person made it even more memorable.

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The five friends all grew up together in McAlester, graduated from McAlester High School in 1997 and attended the University of Oklahoma together before going on to lead successful lives.

Alles (pictured left) has more than 10 years experience as a dental professional and owns more than 70 dental offices in Texas, where he supervises regional managers and oversees quality assurance, as well as doctor recruitment and training at the DECA Dental affiliated offices.

Albright (pictured below) graduated from OU before earning a doctorate in podiatric medicine in Chicago and returning to Oklahoma to run a private practice and perform surgeries and inpatient work at several Tulsa-area hospitals.

McDaniel (pictured right) has been a mortgage lender and branch manager for Veterans United Home Loans for more than nine years in Irving , Texas.

Stipe (pictured above) graduated from OU with a BBA in management information systems and moved to Dallas, where he develops information systems and manages master data for Fortune 500 companies.

Wynn (pictured left) graduated from OU with a BBA in finance, decided to go back to dental school after several years of working in sales, graduated from the University of Oklahoma’s College of Dentistry in 2013 and practices in Tulsa.

The group also recently attended their high school reunion, where they laughed about some of their favorite memories and caught up over a weekend.

Owens hosted a dinner with a band on the Friday before the graduation, when they told stories about when they were growing up and caught up on what everyone was doing now.

The group then teamed up to play golf the next day, with Owens, Wynn and another member won bragging rights against McDaniel, Stipe and Alles.

“It was just a great time getting everybody together again and I hope we can make it another 10 years,” Owens said.

Owens (pictured above) is an insurance agent with Jordan Carris Agency in McAlester, a member of Grand Avenue Methodist Church, McAlester Country Club and McAlester Elks Lodge.

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The following is a Q&A with the group of guys on their favorite memories together and how they keep the friendship going: What is your earliest memory of each other?

O

wens: In seventh grade is where we all started hanging out and really getting to know each other. Basketball games and

four-wheelers at Justin’s house after school. I think Michael was really

accepted into the group first. I remember going to his house after school and hanging out in seventh grade. He also took me to my first OU-Texas football game.

Stipe: I think Ryan might have actually punched me off my bicycle when I was 8.

Wynn: Ryan was an amazing football player in seventh grade. He wasn’t much bigger than me, but was so much faster and could somehow tackle Lenny Austin. The few times I attempted to tackle Lenny it felt like I hit a brick wall and I would have a headache for the rest of the day.

Alles: Michael was the first person I met when I moved to Cardinal Lane in McAlester when I was 8 years old. I lived up the street from him and we played football in the front yard of his house every day until seventh and eighth grade.

Wynn: Rodney moved to McAlester when I was in Mrs. Cable’s thirdgrade class. Rodney was not shy and never stopped talking and he was extremely loud. His nickname was “Rule-book Rod” because he would apply NFL rules to front-yard football games.

Owens: My earliest memory would probably be with Justin Albright — we were on the same peewee baseball team — and of Michael Wynn — we were after the same girl in grade school.

Wynn: I remember playing basketball and riding four-wheelers at Justin’s house. He was a huge fan of Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls. We always had a great time at his place.

Albright: My earliest memories are of Matt and Michael since we all attended Will Rodgers Elementary, and then of Rodney a few years later when he moved to town and also started at Will Rodgers.

McDaniel: My earliest memory of any of our group would be Mikey Wynn. It was 1984 and our family had relocated from Oklahoma City to McAlester and I was entering first grade after my dad had accepted a position to work in the emergency room at McAlester Hospital. I remember walking into the class that first day at Will Rogers with my coke-bottle glasses.

Wynn: He walked into Mrs. Smith’s transitional first grade class and had huge, coke-bottle glasses and was very shy.

McDaniel: I must have impressed the ladies that day.

Wynn: For some reason, I told him I was born in China and it really confused him. We became great friends immediately and have been friends ever since.

McDaniel: I later met Rodney in the third grade and Justin around the fourth grade. Since Nate and Ryan went to Emerson, it was not until seventh grade at Puterbaugh that I met those two crazy kids.

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Albright: I found Rodney to be one of the most organized individuals I have ever met in my life. He was running his electronic monthly budget with cell formulas on Microsoft excel well before anyone even thought about ditching the check book ledger. Rodney has always been calculated on a course of only right answers. This was very apparent from the start with math fact masters at Will Rodgers. His morals and organizational skills have allowed him to transform to a leader in college and propel him to what he has accomplished today. That we were both each other’s best men in our weddings in the middle of 30 years of friendship just goes to show our sustained friendship that continues to this day and is an example of a true best friend.

Stipe: I roomed with Owens during freshman year at OU

What is your favorite memory from high school or college?

M

cDaniel: Some of my best high school memories with the guys are going out to Lake

Eufaula, skiing and getting into a little trouble every now and then. Sometimes we were on our boat or

Owens: Nathan was always to the point and pretty upfront about everything. I roomed with Justin my sophomore year in the frat house. Justin was never one to be overly excited about too much, but I always seemed to get him. Justin would always seem to be trying to get me out of trouble or steer me in the right direction.

maybe Albright’s boat, and sometimes we were in

Albright: Ryan and I were able to survive some really

Owens’ blue Plymouth laser that he drove the wheels

interesting times. Ryan has always toed that line and

off of and we escaped many near death experiences.

certainly pushed me in a lot of ways I wasn’t wanting to

I remember we jumped a cattle guard in my Jeep Wrangler our junior year and Ryan flew out of the back right onto the dirt. Thinking about the stunts we pulled makes me thank my lucky stars we are still among the living.

get pushed. What I found from Ryan is that his confidence is unrivaled and you have no choice but to find confidence in yourself if you are going to survive your time with him.

I know if you can get past his wall, you will find one of the most loyal people that you could ever hope to call a friend.

Wynn: I have great memories with all these guys hanging out at The Barn in high school. The Barn is no longer there because of street modifications, but we would hang out there for hours and talk.

Alles: We all went to The University of Oklahoma in the Fall of 1997. We all pledged Lambda Chi Alpha and that first year in the dorms, I lived with Justin. I lived with him again my first year of dental school four years later. We all lived in the fraternity house our

Wynn: I roomed with Matt my freshman year at OU. He would never clean our room, so one morning I played a prank on him: Trash and clothes were everywhere when I was heading to class. Matt was still in bed, so I told him that my dad was coming to our room and would be there before I got back from class so he needed to clean the room.

When I got back from class Matt had the place spotless and asked where my dad was. I just smiled and said “let’s go eat lunch, he couldn’t make it today.”

sophomore year as well.

Albright: We all pledged Lambda Chi Alpha, which certainly ramped up our friendship as we are all labeled as one unit in the fraternity. Seemed that when one of us was in trouble at the house, we were all in trouble in some way.

Albright: I lived with Nathan my junior year off campus and found that on an emotional level we clicked.

Neither one of us were the beat-around-the-bush type, which led to some very efficient interactions and conversations. I have no documented proof, but I bet his IQ is the highest of us all. And if I’m wrong about that, at

Alles: Those first two years of college were even more fun than high school — at least for me they were.

Hanging with these guys and I met my wife, who I am married to and have identical twin boys that are 8.

least you can save yourself some time and ask him any car question you want to know.

Albright: Even though I never lived with Matt or Michael, there are numerous road trips and college events/

Justin was my best man at my wedding. Michael and

experiences that allowed us time that wasn’t necessarily

Matt were groomsmen as well. I am Justin’s oldest

gained as actual roommates. I still feel just as close to

son’s godfather and recently attended his first holy

them and know that at this point in our lives, we will

communion earlier this year.

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and and roomed with Albright during our junior year.

remain true friends for the rest of our lives.

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How often do y’all meet?

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tipe: Not often enough.

Alles: Not enough. With three of us in Dallas, two

in Tulsa and one in McAlester and this time of our lives

with kids and playing sports makes it very difficult to get together. But when we do, we revert back to acting like we did in high school and college.

Wynn: We need to get together more often. The biggest challenge is the fact that we live in Tulsa, Dallas and McAlester. Having young kids takes up a huge amount of time as well. We plan on meeting at least once a year.

Albright: My time away from Oklahoma and now having a family of my own certainly makes for sporadic meetings. Each of these guys are successful and busy, which makes it difficult to find meeting times at this point in our careers. Living in the same town as Michael allows us to get together on short notice, which is usually quite necessary with small children. Also simple texting banter with each other keeps us in each other’s lives and always available to each other when needed.

McDaniel: With Nate and I being Dallas residents we get to see each other every month or so and I run into Owens when I am back in McAlester every 3-4 months seeing my in-laws. The most common meeting grounds for the whole group is up in Norman watching our beloved OU Sooners.

What is the recipe for maintaining a group of lifelong friends?

S

tipe: That’s a secret recipe.

Owens: I think we all enjoy a lot of the same things — whether that be

skiing trips, golfing trips or football games.

Wynn: I think we have all stayed friends for so long because we made such a strong bond at an early age. We have definitely had our differences over the years and when we all get together, I promise not much has changed. We laugh, argue, wrestle, and sometimes fight. But I know I could call any of these guys and they would be there for me and I would do the same for them.

Alles: You can always have and make new friends, but all these past memories make your old friends so much better. You always have so much to talk about and we can keep each other grounded.

Albright: Certainly you have to go through some ups and downs to really find out what each other are really made of. When you are there for someone when it matters most, special bonds are made. I don’t think we could have set out to make this friendship on our own, it was simply in God’s plan.

Owens: We seem to have made time for each other over the course of the years — making memories that last forever. Through ups and downs, good times and bad, we have all grown and become successful in life — partly, I believe, because of our bonds, friendships, and drive to accomplish as much as possible. We all have unique friendship with each other that I wouldn’t change for anything. I would stand by each of these guys through thick and thin, or whatever we might encounter in life.

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Friends in song: the top 10, with a bonus

By James Beaty | MANAGING EDITOR

Songs about friendship have always found their way onto the recording charts and the best have remained an enduring part of popular culture — much like the greatest friendships have lasted through the years of changing eras. Here's some of the best songs about friends and friendship that have largely stood the test of time.

1 — "You've Got a Friend"

Fri

Here's a song about friendship that had not only one, but two great versions released almost simultaneously by James Taylor and Carole King. That's fitting though, since the two artists were friends in real life — and even shared some of the same musicians on their recordings.

Musicians including Taylor's longtime friend and guitarist Danny Kortchmar played on both versions, and songstress Joni Mitchell sang backing vocals on both, which no doubt aided in a sense of musical continuity with the respective recordings.

James Taylor included his version of King's "You've Got a Friend" on his 1971 album "Mud Slide Slim and the Blue Horizon." King released her recording of the song as a centerpiece of her remarkable album "Tapestry."

The song's lyrics, especially the chorus, convey what friendship is all about: "Just call out my name

and you know wherever I am, I'll come running , to see you again. Winter, spring , summer or fall, all you've got to do is call, and I'll be there, yes I will, you've got a friend."

Taylor and King have both continued to sing the song as part of their concerts and they performed and recorded it again as a live version in 2010 during their Troubadour Reunion Tour.

The song also generated Grammy Awards for both J.T. and King. Taylor's version garnered him

a Grammy that year for Best Male Pop Vocal Performance, while King received the song writer's Grammy Award for Song of the Year.

Now that's what I call one heck of a friendship.

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2 — "You've Got a Friend in Me" One of the great musical ironies of the modern era of animation is that Randy Newman — whose witty lyrics have been used to satirize prejudice, as in his song , "Short People," along with numerous other human failings — wrote and recorded a song that would become strongly identified with one of the most popular children's movie franchises in recent times.

3 — "That's What Friends Are For"

Newman's "You've Got a Friend in Me" not only served as the theme song for the 1995 Disney/Pixar movie "Toy Story," it wound up being used as the theme for "Toy Story 2" in 1999 and as the theme song for the 2010 movie "Toy Story 3" as well. With a "Toy Story 4" in the works, I'll be waiting to see if it's used the fourth time around — and I'll miss it if it isn't.

Newman

recorded

his

best-known

version with fellow singer and song writer Lyle Lovett, whose voice compliments handily with Newman's. They seem to voice the sentiments of the characters of Woody, the cowboy, and Buzz, the astronaut, even if they sound nothing like Tom Hanks or Tim Allen.

Featuring a strong melody with just a touch of ragtime leanings, "You've Got a Friend in Me" offers a message of what friendship is all about. After repeating

Dionne Warwick is surely one of the great interpreters of Burt Bacharach's songs — even if Bacharach wrote the music and someone else, in this case Carole Bayer Sager, usually wrote the lyrics.

Warwick — and some of her famous friends — recorded the most well-known version of the song "That's What Friends Are For" in 1985 as a single release to help raise funds for AIDS research and

4. — "Thank You For Being a Friend"

prevention measures.

Andrew Gold provided a friendly service

When released in 1986, it became

when he wrote and performed "Thank You

the biggest hit of the year, winning

For Being a Friend." In addition to writing

Grammy Awards for Song of the year for

a great number, he provided the TV sitcom

song writers Bacharach and Safer, as well

"The Golden Girls" with an opening theme

as Best Pop Performance by a Duo or

song.

Group with Vocal.

Gold's version went to No. 25 in 1978, but

Released under the name of Dionne &

when Cynthia Fee recorded the number as

Friends, it wasn't difficult for listeners to

the opening theme for "The Golden Girls,"

discern who those friends were who were

she really struck gold, figuratively speaking.

singing along with her on the recording

Sometimes when I'm flipping through the

— Stevie Wonder, Elton John and Gladys

TV channels, if the time is right I'll stop on

Knight.

the opening segment of the recurring theme

Warwick and her friends, Wonder, John

song , just to hear Fey run through it and slip

and Knight, got together again in 2011

into her high falsetto at the end of the bit

to perform the song live in New York,

about "And if I threw a party and invited

proving once again that great songs have

everyone I kn-ew." Talk about a golden girl!.

a long shelf-life.

Fey's great performance ensures that the

By the way, the song raised more than

song will be heard as long as "The Golden

$33 million in charitable funds for AIDS

Girls" episodes continue to run on TV and

research and related causes. That's what

other electronic media.

friends are for, indeed.

Judging by the last time I flipped through

riends the title line a couple of times, the verses

outline Newman's vision of friendship:

"When the road looks rough ahead and

you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed, you just remember what your old pal said, boy, you've got a friend in me."

the channels and saw the series running on

several different networks, that could be for a long , long time.

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5. — "You're My Best Friend"

Country music singer Don Williams had another

huge hit with this song , about his best friend

being his significant other, his girlfriend, his wife.

Although he already had recorded several hits,

this one helped place him in the stratosphere.

Written by Wayland Holyfield, Williams selected

the song as the title track from his album of the

same name. That proved a wise choice, because the

single version of "You're My Best Friend" shot to the top of the charts following its release in 1975.

The opening verse, about placing gold on a finger and giving life to children, leaves no doubt that this is a song of spousal love. The chorus, repeated

three times in the song , sums up the singer's feelings: "You're my bread when I'm hungry, you're my shelter from troubled winds. You're my anchor in life's ocean, but most of all, you're my best friend."

Williams' recording of the song provided him with his second consecutive number one hit on the country music charts — which goes to show

that a song can also provide a friendly service to a singer looking for a hit.

6. — "My Buddy"

I first heard this song sang by Jerry Jeff Walker, who,

Be

along with Willie and the boys, played a significant role in the Austin-area renaissance that played such a huge impact on music, especially in Texas and

Oklahoma. Walker included the song in his album "A Man Must Carry On." However, I would soon learn this song dates much farther back in musical history.

I later heard it in a 1940s version and figured it was a paean of friendship between two buddies serving in the U.S. Armed forces during World War II. Nope.

Although that may have been the intention of those who recorded versions of the song in the early-tomid 1940s, I would discover the song goes back even farther, to the post-World War I period.

Written in 1922 by Walter Donaldson and Gus Kahn,

the song could have been about a former Doughboy remembering a fallen comrade in arms — or not. The

lyrics are at once ambivalent and straight to the point.

If that sounds like a contradiction, check out the

lyrics. They could be interpreted as a song about two friends, or just easily they could be interpreted as a

Fri song between two long-lost lovers. Is it about missing

someone who is simply far away, or someone who has left this earth forever?

In just eight lines, the lyrics and accompanying music create an almost palpable sense of longing :

"The night are long since you went away. I think about you all through the day. My buddy, my buddy; no buddy quite so true."

Then, the second verse continues the sense of longing.

"I miss your voice, the touch of your hand; just long to

know that you understand. My buddy, my buddy. Your buddy misses you."

A song about a soldier missing a buddy who died in combat? A song about sweethearts separated by war?

It's open to lots of interpretations, so find one of your own.

One thing for certain though. A song that's been recorded by artists ranging from Al Jolson in

1922, to Arcade Fire in 2004, has demonstrated its staying power. In 2016, Christina Grimmie recorded

a for the film "The Matchbreaker." In just six years,

the song will notch its 100th anniversary — and it's still being recorded and performed. Not bad for an eight-line song.

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Best

8 — "A Little Help From My Friends" Ringo Starr delivered one of his greatest vocal performances with this song , the second track on the Beatles' landmark Album, "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band."

7. — "Friendship"

It proved rare for Starr to get the second track on

Sherman, set the way-back machine for 1939, when a

an album, much less one of the best songs on it.

Following the opening rendition of "Sgt. Pepper's

song writer named Cole Porter produced yet another

Lonely Hearts Club Band," the album segues over

entry in his list of enduring songs.

recorded applause directly to Ringo singing "What

Porter was a rarity among the lyricists and composers

riend” would you do if I sang out of key, would you stand

who usually worked as a creative team to produce

up and walk out on me?" He works his way to the

what we now call The Great American Songbook

chorus, when he sings "I'll get by with a little help

during an era extending roughly from the 1920s to

from my friends."

the1960s. While many other song writers of the era

His friends, John Lennon and Paul McCartney

nearly always worked as teams, Porter wrote both the

did help him out, along with producer George

music and the lyrics for his songs — many of which

Martin, on the song's final note, when Starr has to

are still considered standards today.

hit a high note about an octave above his normal

"Friendship" is among his most well-known songs and

range and then extend it to the song's closing. After

it became a staple of the then-numerous television

several tries, Starr was advised to just throw his

variety shows airing at the time — usually because it

head back and "let it rip" — which he did.

works so well as a duet. If someone like Dean Martin

Starr not only helped capture the vision his

needed a song to sing with a guest such as actor James

song writing buddies had for their song , he nailed

Stewart, "Friendship," with its tongue-in-cheek lyrics,

it,

provided the perfect material for a duet for a singing

Lennon and McCartney and also George Harrison

partner who wasn't really a singer:

would provide their friend Starr with more songs

"If you're ever in a jam, here I am. If you're ever in a

to sing during his career — but he seemed to be

mess, S.O.S. If you're so happy, you land in jail, I'm

catching on to this song writing thing as the Beatles

your bail."

neared their end, penning "Octupus's Garden" for

Then the song breaks into its swinging chorus: "It's

the final album they recorded, "Abbey Road."

friendship, friendship, just a perfect blendship. When

While his lyrics such as "I'd like to be under the

other friendships are soon forgot, ours will still be

sea, in an octopus's garden in the shade" weren't

hot."

likely to give Bob Dylan — or even Lennon and

Porter's ode to friendship came from the 1939 play,

McCartney — any concern, they did provide a

"DuBarry Was a Lady." Unlike the song "Friendship,"

sense of whimsical fun, which is something that

it's largely forgotten today, which goes to show a great

Starr brought to the group, in addition to his

song can rise above its surroundings — something

excellent drumming.

great friends have been known to do as well.

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9 — "Wind Beneath My Wings"

This song , probably most well-known from the three-handkerchief

weep-fest movie "Beaches," continues to endure. Bette Midler, one

of the lead actresses in the film, recorded the most well-known version of the song , but country singer Gary Morris also delivered a memorable take on it several years before Midler's recording.

Morris' 1983 version went to No. 4 on the country music charts and also garnered awards from the Country Music Association and the

Academy of Country Music. Lou Rawls also recorded a hit version of the song — but it's Midler's version that's most remembered today.

Recorded as part of the soundtrack for "Beaches" in 1988, it hit No. 1 in 1989 and received Grammy Awards for Record of the Year and Song of the Year in 1990 — not bad for song written several years earlier!

It's lyrics, about recognizing someone who's always remained in the shadows, remain illuminating today: "Did you ever know you're my hero and everything I would like to be be? I can fly higher than an eagles, 'cause you are the wind beneath my wings."

10 — "Old Friends / Bookends" Paul Simon took a bold step when he penned this song about friends who are aging during the youth-oriented 1960s. Nevertheless, it became a huge entry in the Simon & Garfunkel canon, one they've performed many times in concert, both together and as one of the most acclaimed duos of all time and as solo artists as well.

“old

In the song , Simon likens old friends sitting on a bench in a park to bookends. He sings of "old men lost in their overcoats, waiting for the sunset," with "The sounds of the city sifting through the trees."

In those youth-centric days of the 1960s, Simon sang "Can you

imagine us years from today, Sharing a park bench quietly, How terribly strange to be seventy."

These days, Simon has continued to record and perform well into his seventies, along with many of his contemporaries such as Bob

Dylan, Van Morrison, Brian Wilson, Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr and others. Here's hoping they continue to perform and continue to be friends.

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11 — "Old Friends"

Here's a bonus to the Top 10: "Old Friends," with vocals

by Willie Nelson, with Roger Miller and Ray Price.

This is on one of Willie's more obscure albums. I ran across it a few years ago when I found a cassette recording of it in a parking lot, with no other vehicles around it.

I took it home to give it a listen. Yes, I still have a few

cassette players around and I wish I had an 8-track player, too. The tape only played a couple of times before it

developed a permanent case of squeaking , but it lasted long enough for me to develop a great liking for the song , "Old Friends."

This isn't the Simon & Garfunkel song. Instead, it's a rare secular song by the gospel music song writers Bill and Gloria Gaither, of all people, with some help from J. Miller.

"Old friends, pitching pennies in the park, playing croquet till it's dark, old friends," they sing. "Old friends, looking up to watch a bird, holding arms to climb a curb, old friends, oh, old friends."

Although the cassette tape no longer survives, I call the song up occasionally online, with one of my favorite renditions performed by Willie and Roger at a Farm Aid concert.

Sadly, Roger Miller and Ray Price are no longer with us, but Willie is still out there, on the road again. He's one

d friends old friend I hope to see every time I get the chance

The song closes with a sort of prayer, which shows the Gaithers' influence.

"Old friends, Lord when all my work is done, bless my life and grant me one old friend, at least one, old friend."

We should all be so blessed.

So there they are, some of the best songs about friendship.

Newman captured the mood perfectly in the last verse of "You've Got a Friend in Me."

"And as the years go by, our friendship will never die.

You're going to see it's our destiny. You've got a friend in me."

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Safety first in kids’ Halloween costumes

Dressing up and engaging in role play is an important component of childhood learning and having fun. Although costumes are regularly used in day care centers, schools and at home, they become the center of attention when Halloween arrives.

The practice of wearing costumes dates back at least 2,000 years to ancient Europeans and Celts. These cultures celebrated a holiday called Samhain, which represented their new year.

Samhain fell on November 1 and marked the first day of winter after the summer harvest. These ancient people associated the winter with coldness, darkness and death and believed the day before Samhain — October 31 — established a distorted boundary between the living and the dead. Therefore, individuals wore costumes and masks to avoid being recognized by the ghosts that came out on the night of Samhain. They would also place bowls of food outside of their homes to satisfy the ghosts and keep them from entering the home.

Although Halloween has transformed more into a commercial holiday than one associated with death and the afterworld in the literal sense, many adults and children continue to participate in the rituals that were set forth many years ago, most notably wearing costumes. Parents may want to ensure that the costumes their children wear are safe to help make Halloween a day without injury.

Create a cape that doesn’t choke. A long cape can be stepped on and then tug at a child’s neck. Instead, make a cape that has arm loops to keep it in place instead of a tie around the neck. This way there never will be a choking hazard.

Check makeup labeling. There are many safe Halloween cosmetics on the market, but some should not be used around the eyes or mouth because allergic reactions could occur.

Double-check all ingredients lists and package warnings before using makeup on children, who tend to have more sensitive skin than adults. Also, it is a good idea to do a test patch of the product. Put a small dab of the makeup in the crook of the inside of the child’s elbow. Wait 24 hours and see if any itching or a rash forms. This could indicate an allergy to the product.

Keep eyes open. Masks are popular components of Halloween costumes, but some designs can obstruct vision or even impair breathing. Masks always should be comfortable to wear and offer good forward and peripheral views.

Choose natural materials for costumes. Buying a pre-made

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costume at the store may save you time and money, but there may be safer options if you construct a costume yourself. Many costumes are made overseas and may contain materials that are toxic or off-gas volatile organic chemicals (VOCs), particularly plastic and vinyl products. Breathing in the fumes can be dangerous to young children. By making the costume yourself, you can control what fabrics and other materials are used.

Go organic. There are a number of companies that are now making Halloween costumes from organic fabrics and recycled materials. A simple online search can give you a host of prospects for purchasing these costumes.

Make it visible. Trick-or-treating at night can be, well, tricky.

Darkness can make it hard for drivers and other pedestrians to see costume-clad children. If going door-to-door will be happening at night, consider giving children glow sticks or flashlights to carry.

There also are reflective tapes that can be attached to costumes that make them light up when lights shine on the tape.

Avoid choking hazards. Many costumes come with small detailing or accessories that may be hazardous to young children.

Youngsters who do not yet know what items should and should not be put in their mouths should not wear costumes with removable or small detailing. Also, avoid the use of fake teeth (such as vampire fangs) and fake blood or goo capsules that are meant to be bitten, so they won’t be swallowed.

Halloween is meant to be a time of fun and adventure. Ensuring costumes are safe for children can help make the day even more enjoyable for all involved.

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“FIND FR IENDS W HO UNDERSTAND YOU AND T HEN YOUR FR IENDSH IP W ILL L A ST, I PROMISE ” — V IC K I DUNCAN

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“Dream Girls” reminisce on their lifelong friendship

“ W E M ADE A PAC T T H AT W E WOULD NO T B E S EPA R AT ED UN T IL W E LE F T T H I S E ART H” — V I C K I DU NCA N

By Allyson Gregory | STAFF WRITER

The “Dream Girls” are a group of five women who have remained friends for as long as they can remember.

The five women, Vicki Duncan, of Hartshorne, Linda Faber, of McAlester, Debi Beck, of Haileyvillle, Janell Sirmans, of Adamson and Barbara Goddard, of Houston are a group of 65-year-old women who have been friends since the fourth grade.

“Our families were all friends, most of our dads were coal miners, but we became real good friends starting in the fourth grade,” Duncan said.

Duncan describes the “Dream Girls” as young and feisty, wild women who love each other deeply.

The women graduated from Hartshorne High School in 1970 and continued their education at various colleges and universities.

Goddard graduated from the University of Washington with a degree in political science and pre-law. Faber graduated from Oklahoma Wesleyan College with a degree in human resources and from Southern Nazarene University with a master’s in management. And Duncan, Beck and Sirmans all earned degrees in education from Southeastern State University.

When asked how the girls managed to remain friends through moving to different cities and figuring out life, Duncan said “we made it a point” to stay in touch.

“We made a pact that we would not be separated until we left this earth,” Duncan said.

To this day, the five of them do not go a month without seeing each other.

“When we get together, you never know what’s gonna happen,” Duncan said.

The “Dream Girls” all have different personalities and different lives, but they all blend together. Nothing is a secret between the five of them, Duncan says.

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The five women have gone through thick and thin together — deaths, illnesses, marriages and many other trials in life and Duncan says that it only makes their bond stronger.

“We just know we need to be there for each other,” Duncan said. “We’ve never had a fight and we’re gonna be together till our last breath.”

The “Dream Girls” have all experienced different things — having kids, graduating school, becoming teachers and watching their kids grow up to have their own kids — and they are proud of what they have accomplished.

“We call ourselves the “Dream Girls” because we all have had dreams, we’ve all see our dreams come true and we all still have dreams,” Duncan said. “Together we can make our dreams real.

Their next “dream” is to go on a cruise together.

“Every one of us share the same heart.”

Duncan describes a moment when all the girls pulled together to help one in need — Goddard was recently just affected by the wreckage of Hurricane Harvey. Her house was flooded with over three feet of water. The girls helped Goddard out in every way they could.

“We’re already planning a trip to take her (Goddard) out to lunch just to show her how we are here for her.”

Choking up, Duncan says “our friendship is very rare…indescribable.

You don’t see any like this anymore.”

The most important aspect of their friendship, according to Duncan, is that they understand each other and never judge one another, no matter what.

“Find friends who understand you and then your friendship will last, I promise,” Duncan said.

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SUPER FRIENDS:

Nine women continue friendship from grade school

By Allyson Gregory | STAFF WRITER

A

group of nine women hold a deep friendship that has lasted since high school.

Jennifer Mullins, Shala Harper, Marlo Barton, Katyisha Martin, Nicole Green, Misty Tollett, Jennifer Stewart, Amy Owens and Alia Turney have all grown up together.

Most of the group met and became friends in grade school at McAlester before calling their group the “Super 8.” Although the group added a ninth friend to the mix in 1990, they decided to stick with the name because they are rarely all together at the same time.

Mullins and Barton met in dance class when they were each five years old and started adding more friends to their group.

Harper laughed about how she joined the group — “They didn’t give me a choice. Jenni walked up and said ‘hi, my name’s Jenni Barnes, what’s yours?’ and the rest is history.”

Martin was the last girl to enter the group after she joined as a freshman in high school when she was two years younger than everyone else.

Some of the girls moved away for college, some stayed home and raised children while going to school, and others moved away, but always remained in touch.

Mullins and Harper had their children around the same time and all the women helped raise each other’s children.

Green says that the first years after college were the hardest, but they still made time for each other.

After most of the group graduated high school, Mullins began hosting an annual Thanksgiving party on the Friday following the holiday so all the girls knew they would see each other then.

Members of the group also knew that despite living further away from each other, they could still meet at another friend’s house if they had a problem.

Mullins jokes about how they all wanted to leave McAlester and now they are all back except for Turney, who lives in Tulsa.

The nine girls also stay in touch with a group message that they say is constantly ringing with new notifications.

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They try to plan at least four official gettogethers per year and are currently planning a slumber party and a Christmas party.

“There’s not a week that goes by that we don’t hear from one another,” Harper said.

“There’s not a day that goes by,” Martin interjected.

Support system Mullins tells about a time when her husband and daughter both totaled their vehicles and they were running low on money.

“I was just venting to Katyisha about everything and not an hour later, she shows up with a truck for us,” Mullins said. “They bought us a truck just because.”

Mullins said she believes some friendships are formed out of convenience, but her group is special.

“We’re all different breed and it doesn’t matter to us,” she said.

Through tears Martin wonders what will happen when life takes its course — “If we don’t have one of us, we’ll still be tight, but we will forever be altered.”

Green said that even though each of the friends are at different stages in life, there have never been any hard feelings or pressure within the group.

But they still give each other a hard time.

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Shala Harper, top left, Marlo Barton, Jennifer Mullins, left, Katyisha Martin and Nicole Green get together to reminisce on their unique friendship.

“We support each other 100 “It’s once in a lifetime that percent, but we’re all brutally someone finds that group of honest with each other — Jenni people...their main crew, their true more so than the rest of us,” tribe...that supports them, loves Harper said jokingly. them, challenges and inspires An important part of their them everyday,” Tollett said. friendship is forgiveness and trust.

Harper added “we are not the Martin says that she trusts these country club folk, but a whole girls with everything , even her combination of people who love fiancé — “If I walked into my each other. We are friends because house and saw one of them we genuinely love each other.” with my man, I wouldn’t think Green, a mother of four, worries anything of it. That’s what kind of about her daughter, saying “I want friendship we have. so badly for her to have something “We’ll walk away from a lot of stuff, like this.” but not each other,” Martin said.

“These girls are my roots…they Tollett talks about how important keep me exactly where I need to their friendship is to her. be,” Martin said. “ T HER E ’S NO T A W EEK T H AT G O E S BY T H AT W E D ON ’T HE A R F RO M O N E A NO T H E R ,” — S H A L A H A R PER

Members of a group of nine women hold a deep friendship that has lasted since high school.

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BE N C H Chris Merrifield, left, Emilee Coxsey and Donna Curry stand by one of their friendship benches.

ALLYSON GREGORY |Staff photo

FrinkChambers student brings friendship benches to area

By Allyson Gregory | STAFF WRITER

KEVIN HARVISON | Staff photo Students at Frink-Chambers wait for the unveiling of the new friendship bench at a schoolwide assembly.

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E

milee Coxsey wants to help people in Pittsburg County be nicer to each other.

The eighth grader at Frink-Chambers Public School recently helped raise money to purchase some friendship benches at her school to help eliminate bullying and violence throughout her school — but the benches will soon appear at several schools in the county.

“I thought that instead of trying to just stop bullying , you can show kindness to others,” Coxsey said. “I see this helping a lot of people by showing them that they don’t have to be lonely anymore.”

Coxsey first found out about the friendship bench around six months ago when Donna Curry, Frink-Chambers counselor and 4-H leader, told her 4-H group about a Florida organization called Tiny Girl, Big Dream, which was created by Acacia Woodley in 2012.

The mission of Tiny Girl, Big Dream is to “create a positive solution to the growing problem of bullying , violence and low self-esteem,” according to the website, and designed the friendship bench project as an alternative way to teach kids kindness.

Coxsey jumped on board when Curry asked if any FrinkChambers 4-H members would be interested in raising the money to purchase a bench.

“She really thought it was a neat idea and concept,” Curry said. “She thought she could really benefit from this because she was teased when she was younger.”

Chris Merrifield, a McAlester Home Store employee, found out about Tiny Girl, Big Dream and told Curry about his desire to put these benches in every school in McAlester — but he needed help with fundraising.

Coxsey donated her time and efforts into making this her service project.

Her 4-H group raised some money from a bake sale and then Coxsey went to different businesses, organizations

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and individuals asking if they would like to donate to her cause.

“I’m proud of Emily and her efforts,” Curry said.

Coxsey also applied for a county grant and was awarded $250 that helped raised enough money to purchase two benches for Frink-Chambers.

Curry said these benches create an outlet for students who are feeling lonely or who need a friend.

On Friday, Aug. 25, Curry organized a school-wide assembly to present the benches to the rest of the students and faculty.

The assembly consisted of a character skit to show kindness to the children, a speech by Curry about the benches and a letter read by Coxsey. Each student received a special bracelet saying “I Am Amazing” that was included with the friendship benches.

Coxsey’s mother, Deanna Coxsey, said that she believed her daughter’s kindness came about after she was bullied.

“She felt like she didn’t belong ,” Deanna Coxsey said through the tears. “I just love her heart and her kindness.

It never stops.”

These are the first benches to be placed in a Pittsburg County school.

“I think that it’s a great idea that when a student feels like they are lonely, that they can sit on the bench and see if someone notices them,” Curry said. “We all have to be aware of the bench and recognize when a friend is in need.”

Merrifield said that there are 24 schools in Pittsburg County excluding high schools.

“We have already ordered over 20 benches that will be placed in every school in Pittsburg County,” Merrifield said.

These benches will soon be all over Pittsburg County creating a space where students can go when they feel alone in hopes that they will not feel that way for long.

PHOTO CUTLINES: (BENCH 1) Chris Merrifield, left, Emilee Coxsey and Donna Curry stand by one of their friendship benches.

(BENCH 2) KEVIN HARVISON | Staff photo Students at Frink-Chambers wait for the unveiling of the new friendship bench at a school-wide assembly.

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“Our goal is to get a kindness chain throughout the whole building,” Miller said.

Miller said students have already begun to be more kind and respectful since starting the program.

“After we got the kindness chain program going students started to realize it is not that difficult to be kind to someone and to be acknowledged fo something that is really a lost quality,”

kindness chain

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‘kindness chain’

McAlester’s Puterbaugh Middle School starts

By Lacey Sudderth | STAFF WRITER

One local school is going the extra mile to promote kindness and respect among students.

McAlester’s Puterbaugh Middle School Principal Caroline Miller decided to create a “kindness chain” to show the students that good deeds and kind actions don’t go unnoticed.

As students, teachers and faculty notice a student going out of their way to be kind, they write the good deed or activity on a slip of paper. Every Thursday during “Thursday Thoughts,” Miller reads each slip out loud to acknowledge the good deed and connect the slip to the paper chain along the edge of the school’s ceiling.

“Our goal is to get a kindness chain throughout the whole building ,” Miller said.

Miller said students have already begun to be more kind and respectful since starting the program.

“After we got the kindness chain program going , students started to realize it is not that difficult to be kind to someone and to be acknowledged for something that is really a lost quality,” Miller said. “It’s very easy for bullies to pick targets and put them down, but it is just as easy to be kind to someone and that is what we are trying to do here.”

Miller said she reached out to her teachers to find the most kind and respectful students.

She said the teachers had noticed outstanding kindness from four students in particular — Katelynn Schrader, Jacob McBride, Jenna Gaberino and Nickolas Thornhill.

“These students are our leaders of tomorrow,” Miller said. “They are the ones that step up and take the initiative and the ones people look to follow because they are doing the right thing and treating everyone like they should.”

Katelynn Schrader,13, said she believes being kind can help others not feel alone when life gets tough.

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“Life is really hard sometimes and I have been through a lot,” Schrader said. “I know life can be hard for people, so I try and help them. It makes me very sad when I see other people being mean and I try to help kids that may be bullied.”

Jacob McBride, 14, said he displays kindness to others because of how his parents raised him.

“My parents raised me good and if I see someone struggling , I just want to help them out as often I can,” McBride said.

Jenna Gaberino,13, said she shows kindness because it can help change someone’s day.

“It is just good to help people out sometimes,” she said. “They might need help and you might not ever know it and if you are kind to them it might change their day.”

Nickolas Thornhill,13, said he knows of the importance of being nice to others when others might be going through challenging times.

“I know people can be going through a lot sometimes,” Thornhill said. “I know how it feels to be going through a hard time, so I try to be kind and help out whenever I can.”

Miller said because of the “kindness chain” program, she believes that students are beginning to see the importance of being kind to others.

“Other students are beginning to follow suit of the students who are showing more kindness and respect,” Miller said. “We are very proud.”

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Local photographer promotes love, kindness

By Lacey Sudderth | STAFF WRITER

H

eather Scott wanted to do something after seeing so much hate in the news.

The owner of LaMon Photography in McAlester decided to do something unique to promote acceptance and love after a 20-year-old Ohio man drove his car into a crowd of counter-protesters at a white nationalist rally this summer in Charlottesville, Virginia.

Scott rallied together a group of diverse individuals to participate in her “Only Love” photo shoot held in historic downtown McAlester on Sunday afternoon.

“I have always tried to promote acceptance and love to everyone that comes through my door,” Scott said. “That morning I was looking at the pictures that were posted about the Charlottesville tragedy with my husband and my heart was absolutely broken.”

James Alex Fields Jr. was accused of second-degree murder and other charges after authorities said he drove his car into a crowd of counter-protestors near a white supremacist rally that erupted into violence, according to an Associated Press report.

The car rampage killed 32-year-old Heather Heyer, who was among the counter-protesters responding to the rally by white nationalists and others who oppose a plan to remove from a Charlottesville park a statue of Confederate Gen. Robert E. Lee, according to reports.

Scott said she decided to do something immediately after hearing what happened.

“I felt I needed to do something and it needed to be a quick response to the Charlottesville events,” Scott said. “I wanted an immediate counter to the hate we are seeing flooding our social media and televisions.”

Scott posted on her LaMon social media page, asking if anyone would be willing to participate in her “Only Love” unity photo shoot.

“Everyone thinks you can’t do anything , but everyone can do something ,” Scott said. “I didn’t do much, I just literally got on my Facebook page and asked if anyone could get by 4 p.m. that afternoon for a quick photo shoot.”

Scott said she was pleased with the Johns said. “I had been accustomed to response and turnout from the community. believing McAlester didn’t want to band “I had 25 to 30 people show up and it was together concerning racial, ethnic or plenty,” Scott said. “It was just enough to religious issues, but seeing them come show the message we wanted to promote. together restored a lot of hope in me that “I am very proud of the people that showed my hometown is willing to take a stance up and the hearts that were there,” she on something.” added. “I truly feel that everyone that Johns said she is proud of her hometown. came to the photo shoot wanted to send the message of love.”

“To see my hometown show who we are Scott said during the photo shoot, she and what we stand for was really special split the people into two groups and to me,” Johns said. “I hope they continue had them walk forward and meet in the to do that. This is going to be really middle and shake a stranger’s hand and important in the future that we continue introduce themselves. to do this.”

“Sometimes that is all it takes to realize Scott said she hopes the photographs can we are not all that different,” Scott said.

“Everyone really enjoyed themselves and show people that there is a lot of love in I haven’t seen a negative comment about this world. the photos.”

“We are all in this together, we are all Activist and world traveler Trinity Johns, human beings, we are all Americans — so of McAlester was one of the individuals let’s act like it,” Scott said. “Let’s behave who participated in the photo shoot. like we live in the greatest nation in the “Going to the photo shoot and seeing a world and we are all in this together.” bunch of my friends and people there that I hadn’t met before was really wonderful,”

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“E V E RYO N E T H I N K S YO U CA N ’T D O A N Y T H I NG, B U T E V E RYO N E CA N D O SO M E T H I NG,” — HE AT HE R SC O T T

Heather Scott, owner of LaMon Photography decided to do something unique in her community by asking a group of McAlester residents to come together for her “Only Love” photo shoot in downtown McAlester on Aug. 15.

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Foodie at Heart Some fall-friendly recipes for home

Friendship FRIENDSHIP COOKIES (Otherwise known as Snickerdoodles)

The Amish call this Friendship Bread.

INGREDIENTS: 1 Cup softened butter 3/4 Cup Granulated sugar 1/2 Cup Light brown sugar 1 egg, plus 1 yolk 1 TBSP Vanilla 1 Tsp Baking soda 1 Tsp Cream of tater 1/2 Tsp Kosher salt 1 Tsp Cinnamon 2 3/4 Cup Flour

By Amy Johns I Publisher

Cinnamon Sugar 1/4 CUP Granulated sugar 1 TBSP Cinnamon

DIRECTIONS: Preheat oven to 325°F. 2. Spray baking sheet with non stick spray. Set aside. 3. In bowl of stand mixer beat butter and both sugars until light and fluffy, 2-3 minutes. 4. With mixer on medium speed add in egg, yolk and vanilla and beat for another minute, scraping the sides as necessary. 5. Turn mixer to medium low and mix in baking soda, cream of tartar, salt and 1 tsp cinnamon. Mix for 30 seconds, scraping sides as necessary. 6. Turn mixer to low and add in flour, mixing until just combined. 7. In a separate small bowl make your Cinnamon Sugar by mixing together cinnamon and sugar, stirring until evenly combined. 8. Using a cookie scoop or spoon, measure out about 2 Tbsp of dough and roll into a ball.

Then roll each cookie dough ball into the Cinnamon Sugar mixture. 9. Place on prepared baking sheet about 2 inches apart. 10. Bake for 10-12 minutes, turning cookie sheet halfway through baking. 11. Remove from oven. 12. Enjoy!

Source: getinmybelly.com

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FRIENDSHIP STEW Invite your friends over for an evening of friendship and yummy stew. With the temperatures a bit cooler this is a perfect way to celebrate fall. Have everyone bring over a couple cans of vegetables – whatever they may want to bring or have available in the pantry.

INGREDIENTS: Chicken or Beef Olive Oil Garlic Onion 3 cans Vegetable soup Bouillon cubes, beef flavor packet, gravies or sauces (optional)

DIRECTIONS: Chicken or Beef diced and grilled up with some olive oil, a little garlic and onion.

Dump all the cans of vegetables into a large soup pan.

I like to have each person pour in their own cans. It’s more fun that way. Bring to a boil.

Add in the chicken or beef mixture. I keep chicken and beef flavor packets on hand to boost flavors of soups, gravies and sauces. You can add one or more of these if you like. You can use bouillon cubes as well. Let simmer for 30 minutes.

I warm up a big loaf of French bread while the soup is simmering. In addition, I slice up some green onions, shred some fresh parmesan cheese, and open up some pine nuts to put on top of the soup. Sour cream is a nice addition as well.

Some of my friends like to cube up the French bread and put in the bottom of the bowl. I like mine sliced so I can sop up the broth.

Friendship Stew is even better on day two! Enjoy.

GOLDEN FRIENDSHIP COCKTAIL INGREDIENTS: 1 oz Amaretto 1 oz Sweet Vermouth 1 oz White Rum 1 oz Ginger Ale DIRECTIONS: Mix amaretto, sweet vermouth and white rum in a collins glass with ice, and fill with ginger ale. Garnish with an orange spiral and a cherry.

Source: 1001cocktails.com

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FALL 2017