OF COURSE HE WOULD HAVE PREFERRED TO ENTER IN A FINE CARRIAGE DRAWN BY A BRACE OF ARABIAN STALLIONS
{8}
{9}
{ 10 }
The Bishop of Pippidufka
THE new Bishop of Pippidufka urged on his donkey.
It was late afternoon. He had been riding all day and, if the last set of directions he had received were accurate, his new kingdom lay just over the next rise. Of course he would have preferred to enter in a fine carriage drawn by a brace of Arabian Stallions, but then, if the truth be known, he would have also preferred, to have been appointed personal religious advisor to the All-Powerful-Greatest-Lord-in-the-Realm in the Capital City, rather than a lowly minor prelate in a provincial backwater that he’d never heard of, let alone even find on a map.
{ 11 }
{ 12 }
ON THE OTHER HAND, at that moment, a warm fire, some fine clothes, a butt of roast swine, and a flagon of Malmsey served by a healthy country lass (with strong religious feelings of course)—not to mention a few coins in the alms bowl every Sunday—would not only be a welcome respite from his travels, but truth be told, not an unacceptable start for one whose condition had been, prior to his appointment, that of penury. (How he came to receive his commission was still a matter of some mystery to him and thus a tale that remains to be told).
PERCHED ATOP THE ROCK WAS A FELLOW OF SOMEWHAT DUBIOUS APPEARANCE WHO HELD TIGHTLY TO A JUG, FROM WHOSE AROMA THE BISHOP DEEMED LIKELY TO CONTAIN, OR HAVE CONTAINED, A FERMENTED BEVERAGE OF ONE SORT OR ANOTHER { 13 }
SO HE SPUTTERED, AND STAMMERED, AND SPIT, AND GROWLED, UNTIL HE SPUTTERED, AND STAMMERED, AND SPAT, AND GROWLED HIMSELF INTO A FIT OF APOPLEXY
{ 24 }
{ 25 }
{ 26 }
The Imam of Siddi Ba’aaka
THE next morning, after the new Imam of
Siddi Ba’aaka had dressed and eaten and prayed, he went outside and began to ring his hand-bell up and down like a madman until a sizeable crowd of villagers had gathered to see what the fuss was all about.
THAT WAS ENOUGH! HE ROSE, HALF-NAKED, AND WENT TO THE DOOR OF THE HUT WHERE HE FURIOUSLY RANG AND RANG HIS HAND-BELL. { 27 }
SHE THEN BEGAN TO SPIN ALL THAT GOLD INTO THREAD. SHE SPUN. AND SPUN. AND SPUN. AND SPUN. UNTIL HER LITTLE HUT WAS FILLED WITH SPOOLS OF GOLDEN THREAD.
{ 40 }
{ 41 }
{ 42 }
Lady Wu’s Revenge OR
The Mendicant Monk of Pei Pei du Fu Kwa OR
Emporer Fu’s 1,000 Stone Soup ALSO KNOWN AS
The Taille of the Mendacious Mendicant
THE Mendicant Monk, recently assigned to Pei Pei
du fu Kwa by the Grand Abbot of the Grand Monastery, was having a fitful night’s sleep. He tossed and turned and tossed and turned, grew angrier and angrier. Then he tossed and turned some more. And grew angrier still Thus, having worked himself into a froth, he rose, went into the antechamber where Lady Wu slept, roused her from her slumber, and after berating her for the shoddy and disrespectful manner in which he was being treated—the parsimony of his meals, the crudeness of his garments, the roughness of his mattress and linens, the lack of adequate heat in his chamber — beat her with his staff. Soundly. THUS, HAVING WORKED HIMSELF INTO A FROTH, HE ROSE, WENT INTO THE ANTECHAMBER WHERE LADY WU SLEPT, ROUSED HER FROM HER SLUMBER { 43 }
A NOTE ABOUT “AI VEI VEI” They are the global village’s most talked about and controversial co-workers. Legend claims “Ai Vei Vei” is a collective hallucination of the Nob Hill Guild of Upstarts “generated” during a particularly lightning-heavy Burning Man festival. While “their” responses to my instructions were often misunderstood, forcing me to spend an enormous amount of time cleaning up after “their” work, I still would like to acknowledge Ai Vei Vei, my visual collorator(s), for “their” help in recreating the visual world of Pippidufka as I imagined it.
{ 60 }
“IT ALL DEPENDS WHO’S TELLING THE TAILLES” “The Compleate Illustrated Lost Folke Tailles of Pippidufka” (also known as The Lost Folke Tailles of Pei Pei Du Fu Kwa and The Lost Folke Tailles of Siddi Ba’aaka) “annotated” and “collected” in a new “translation” by Max Singer, noted “expert in Pippidufkaniana” and author of the best-selling Pippidufka for Dummies are a collection of stories about a small, isolated, backwater village, of unidentifiable geography, and no consequence; inhabited by a mixed and motley group of citizens, of uncertain ethnicity and no importance. It is, literally, a one-horse town: the name of the steed being — variously—Zwaibak, Schloom or Njuki. It all depends who’s telling the “Tailles” “...A VAST CREATIVE, IMAGINATIVE ENTERPRISE...” “These tales have the tone of the Arabian Nights. Max Singer has created an entire universe with his musings which he wants the reader to imagine he re-discovered thumbing through some musty tomes. It’s akin to creating a world like Lord of the Rings, an Arthurian Saga, Harry Potter or Game of Thrones. And yet these tales are more down to earth, more folksy, whimsical and funny, which makes them more original. This is a vast creative, imaginative enterprise. An incredible cast of characters.” Dr. Louis Gallo. Professor of English. Radford University { 62 }
THE PIPPIDUFKA SERIES
The Compleate Illustrated Lost Folke Tailles of Pippidufka The Lost Village of Pippidufka [A Sherlock Holmes Mystery]
Pippidufka for Dummies The Besotted Vizier The Cleriks‘ Tailles
The Bishop of Pippidufka The Imam of Siddi Ba’aaka Lady Wu’s Revenge or The Mendicant Monk Of Pei Pei Du Fu Kwa
The Apocryphal Tailles
Pu’ud or The Voice of The Gooseberry God The Golden Shekel of Siddi Ba’aaka Treasure of Pippidufka The Taille of Zwaibak
Luug & Oog
or The Crowning of King Krone
Nipk’s Taille
or The Tax Collector of Pippidufka with Treasure of Pippidufka
TO BE ISSUED COMPLETE IN ONE VOLUME { 63 }
MAX SINGER
A
WRITER, humorist, political cartoonist & satirist, photographer, designer, illustrator, painter & street artist, whose point of view across creative disciplines is always smart and unique, edgy, hip and often funny as hell. MAX began his rise to obscurity as
an Underground Cartoonist (ala R. Crumb) for the Nola Express in New Orleans. But even those stonedout hippies were clueless as to the meaning of his work. So Max did the right thing, moved to New York & became an award-winning humorist & artist: his work was featured in such disparate publications as New York Newsday, The Atlantic and The New York Times as well as High Times and High Society. He created animated political cartoons for Hard Copy, wrote sketches for SNL and his Homefront Comix was a prescient response to 9/11. Max survived the Dubya years by writing and designing the satirical e-zine “A Scurrilous Rag.” He is author of “The Two Last Wills & Testaments Of Deadwood Dick, The Waters and Other Bedtime Stories from The Future. And One’s The Aprés Life: The Revised Official Users Guide. As well as numerous books of his paintings, street art, typographic art and digital “fotografix”.
{ 64 }
ALSO BY MAX SINGER FICTION ■ The Waters and Other Bedtime Stories from The Future: ■ The Two Last Wills and Testaments Of “Deadwood Dick” ■ “One’s The Aprés Life: The Revised Official New Arrivals Users Guide.” ■ If the chicken was in such a hurry to get to “the other side” why didn’t she just lie down in the middle of the road and wait for a Semi to squash her? And other burning questions HISTORY ■ Forgotten America: A Graphic Narrative of American History [22 Vols.] ■ Forgotten America. Portraits of Americans. A Portrait of America. An Illustrated “Cook’s Tour” of Forgotten American History. Volume One: From Alabama to New York: Volume Two: From North Carolina Tyo Wyoming: ART ■ The @Angstville Chronicles: And Other Non-Linear Ironic Postmodern Graphic Narratives ■ Chawkman Speaks: “Washed Away”: (The Complete 2012 Season) ■ Free Art Project @Angstville. Chawkman’s “Angstville Chronicles” ■ #Masterpieces_of_world_art_2.0 [For The Tik Tok Generation] PHOTOGRAPHY ■ They/Them: Portraits from The Gilded Closet ■ 75 Views of The Chrysler Building ■ The Empty Quarter: A Memoir of My Stay In The French Quarter During The Plague Years 2020–2021 { 65 }
two bIt Dreadful Press* 176 EAST 81ST STREET NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK ZONE IMPROVEMENT PLAN 10028 UNITED STATES PLANET EARTH SOLAR SYSTEM ORION ARM MILKY WAY GALAXY LOCAL GROUP VIRGO SUPERCLUSTER LANIAKEA SUPERCLUSTER THE [A?] UNIVERSE THEMAXYFACTORY@YAHOO.COM SILICON CHIP IDENTIFIER CYBERSPACE *Formerly Penny Dreadful Press {before inflation}
{ 66 }