12.10 Stay Cation, August 28, 2008, Volume 12, Issue 10, MauiTime

THURSDAY, AUGUST 28

2008

VOLUME 9

ISSUE 10

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Y A ST N O I T A C

Y, A D R O AB L G N I E T L A Y R T B S E I L U CE MA PG. 12 EH BRAH! | 6

HORSELESS HEAD

MAUI VOTES ‘08 | 7 TASHA KAMA

PICKS | 22 CABARET!

PURE BALONEY

NO BALONEY

Senator Roz Baker (D)

Party Challenger Bart Mulvihill (D)

If you feel like you are constantly fed nothing but the same old processed line of meatless excuses year after year, and want to hear what is really going on in Honolulu, go to

www.bartsmaui.com Watch the videos and see for yourself where the political baloney begins and ends with Senator Baker.

Decide for yourself, not what your friends or Union Rep tell you, what is best for you and your family.

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YOU MUST VOTE FOR THIS RACE IN THE PRIMARY ON SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 20th 2

AUGUST 28, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

4 MAUI COUNTY ML&P gets blasted in Letters. Our election coverage continues with more Primary Primer blurbs and a profile of Tasha Kama. A severed horse heads turns up in Eh Brah! Rob Report’s juiced about alternative energy. LC Watch talks judicial review. We break down David Cole’s big fat bonus in The Business End. Coconut Wireless goes from voting machines to Little League baseball.

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION Describe the worst vacation you’ve ever been on in five words or less.

Editor: Jacob Shafer New Mexico,gnats, bat guano Calendar Editor/Staff Writer: Kate Bradshaw Bears: don’t feed them Contributors: Jessica Armstrong, Starr Begley, Caeriel Crestin, Lloyd Dangle, Rob Parsons, Chuck Shepherd, Cole Smithey, Ynez Tongson

12 FEATURE STORY With Labor Day upon us and air fares soaring, we examine a more-enticing-than-ever option: the stay-cation.

Illustration: Ron Pitts Photography: Sean Michael Hower Art Director: Brittany Shaw Yellowstone, Giardia, no restrooms

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18 FILM

Administrative Assistant: Jennifer Brown

Cole Smithey thinks the new politically charged Don Cheadle film Traitor is genius.

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19 Movie Listings

Publisher: Tommy Russo Montezuma’s revenge

21 DA KINE CALENDAR

MauiTime Weekly is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2008 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. Maui Time Weekly may be distributed only by MauiTime Weekly’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime Weekly is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime Weekly, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime Weekly are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime Weekly.

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CONTENTS

INTERNET PRICES WITH LOCAL SERVICE

22 Picks 23 Grid

27 CLASSIFIEDS 29 Sign Language 30 Restless Native 31 Mind Body Spirit

Maui Time Weekly 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 • fax (808) 244-0446 www.mauitime.com Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of the MauiTime Weekly

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KAMA’AINA SPECIAL

LETTERSTOTHEEDITOR AG LAND LOOPHOLE Re: The recent feature on Maui Land & Pineapple’s proposed Honolua Bay deal [“The Price of Priceless,” August 21]: ML&P could still develop the mauka area of Honolua with “Important Ag.” I’m alarmed that they would present a plan that leaves the door open for development in Honolua while talking about preserving it. If the community, community groups, ML&P and politicians want to save Honolua, they need to do better than leave part of it in Important Ag Lands designation. There should be a law that there is no future development north of Kapalua.

CASE CLOSED UNANSWERED QUESTIONS The concept of ML&P acquiring 690 TVR permits so that millionaire offshore investors can have an easy way of making their mortgages is absolutely ludicrous. With thousands of Maui property owners scrambling to make their mortgage payments, increasing property taxes (even though values have gone down) everyone is pretty much tapped out. ML&P has yet to give an asking price for its Honolua property and is using pressure tactics on the community to bully its needs for corporate success.

“Hurry up or this deal is off,” has been Steve Case’s pitch since the days of his AOL corporate raid on Time-Warner which caused the biggest stock loss in American corporate history—over $100 billion! “Stealing Time,” written by Washington Post investigative journalist Alec Klein is a must read for anyone dealing with Case or David Cole.

Trusting Maui residents often take people for their word. Was the old Kapalua Hotel really 80 percent recycled? Does Honolua stream really mysteriously disappear right where the ditch that carries

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

Jim Dodd, submitted online at mauitime.com Send your letters to the editor via e-mail (letters@mauitime.com), regular mail (Letters to the Editor, Maui Time Weekly, 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793-1742) or fax (808-244-0446). All correspondence must include your full name, hometown and phone number. Views expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Maui Time.

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As soon as David Cole and Steve Case took over ML&P, this future was inevitable. They want to develop resorts and luxury houses and “agriculture is just not profitable.” What about bamboo? Kipahulu is profitable, they just need to be creative and look into other options. They missed the boat on the land speculation of West Maui but could be ahead of the game in sustainable building and futures by investing in bamboo right now— thus creating agricultural jobs and truly affordable homes for those who live here.

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water to West Maui crosses it? Did ML&P really give land to the Maui Preparatory Academy? Where are all the old DBCP barrels buried (a toxic chemical with a 140 year shelf life)? How come they never closed the deal with Maui Coastal Land Trust on Mokeleia Bay? What’s the plan for cleaning up 50 years of carcinogenic black plastic buried 2 feet deep on nearly 28,000 Maui acres? A recent news article claimed 13 straight quarterly losses yet David Cole gets a $4.1 million bonus, and don’t forget his sweet 180-acre Upcountry perk. Can an ML&P spokesperson have any credibility at all? It is all greenwash! Maybe it’s time to take the money and run Mr. Cole.

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MAUICOUNTY

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

County Council (South Maui)

“Quality of life is not just economic survival. It means having the discipline to plan within our island's carrying capacity, to protect our environment and to preserve our culture.”

-Wayne Nishiki NAME: Norman Vares AGE: 68 YEARS ON MAUI: 59 PRFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE: Veteran, contactor, construction consultant PRESIDENTIAL ENDORSEMENT: Decline to state KEY DISTRICT ISSUES: HOUSING Advocates use of a “revolving fund” to pay for affordable housing that would be managed by the County or locally owned companies; calls for smaller lot sizes… INFRASTUCTURE Calls for completion of road projects to ease Kihei traffic, expansion of Kihei’s wastewater treatment plant, creation of a non-potable water transmission line for use on golf courses, parks and highways.

KEY MAUI ISSUES: ECONOMY Says the County needs to diversify the economy through promotion of agriculture, high tech businesses and alternative energy… INFRASTRUCTURE Calls the economic downturn a “perfect time to catch up on capital improvement” projects.

“I do not have a political background but I think that would be my advantage coming into this race.”

--Norman Vares NOTES: The incumbent, Michelle Anderson, decided not to run for personal reasons and is endorsing Nishiki; Joseph Gannon has dropped out of the race and told us he is supporting Couch.

NAME: Don Couch AGE: 52 YEARS ON MAUI: 18 CURRENT PROFESSION: Information Technology Manager EXPERIENCE: Budget/finance specialist, radio/television commentator, County Deputy Planning Director, Executive Assistant to Mayor Alan Arakawa PRESIDENTIAL ENDORSEMENT: Decline to state KEY DISTRICT ISSUES: KIHEI GREENWAY Calls creation of a non-motorized right-of-way a “forgotten promise,” vows to “use every lever available to me to see that the Kihei Greenway gets built.”… DEVELOPMENT Sees the proposed creation of a large residential district in Kihei as outlined in the General Plan as a red flag: “I am not convinced at this point that such an artificial addition to the South Maui community would be a positive step.”

KEY MAUI ISSUES: ECONOMY Calls on the County to recognize “that tourism drives a large percent of our economy and [to] act accordingly.” At the same time, advocates economic diversification… WATER “There is enough water on Maui. It just has to be acquired… I will use the resources available to push for development of adequate water supplies.”

MAUI VOTES ‘08

NAME: Wayne Nishiki AGE: 64 YEARS ON MAUI: 40 EXPERIENCE: Businessperson, Maui County Councilmember PRESIDENTIAL ENDORSEMENT: Decline to state KEY DISTRICT ISSUES: JOBS Calls on government to “start addressing infrastructure, energy and conservation projects which will supply good paying jobs to our out-of-work residents.”… QUALITY OF LIFE This includes affordable housing, environmental protection and increased food and energy independence.

KEY MAUI ISSUES: WATER Advocates legal changes to allow gray water irrigation, drought tolerant landscaping, more reservoirs/catchment systems: “We have more water than we think - we waste a significant portion of it.”… PLANNING Notes the ongoing General Plan Revision process and argues the Council should stop routinely approving variances and “adhere to our plan and use it to shape our island's future.”

“We are chasing the weddings off the beaches, closing down the vacation rentals, stopping the windsurfing lessons, blocking Halloween in Lahaina…The message went out that Maui County is no longer welcoming its guests.”

--Don Couch

House 11th District (South Maui) (Incumbent) NAME: Joe Bertram III (D) AGE: 51 YEARS ON MAUI: 40 CURRENT PROFESSION: State legislator EXPERIENCE: Non-profit director, various community positions PRESIDENTIAL ENDORSEMENT: Obama KEY DISTRICT ISSUES: EDUCATION Promises to “continue to birddog the DOE to allow a private developer to build a high school.”… HEALTHCARE Wants to reform the Certificate of Need process “to allow our own hospital.”

KEY MAUI ISSUE: ECONOMY Says he will “advocate for small businesses”; wants to “[reduce] government regulations for public/private partnerships [and] to base our economic development on protecting and enhancing our environment.”

Continued on pg. 6

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

5

MAUICOUNTY

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

House 11th District cont.

(South Maui) (Challenger) NAME: Michael Gingerich (D) AGE: 30 YEARS ON MAUI: 9 CURRENT PROFESSION: Business owner/fitness trainer PRESIDENTIAL ENDORSEMENT: Obama KEY DISTRICT ISSUES: ECONOMY Says restrictions on tourism-centric industries like beach weddings disproportionately affect Kihei/South Maui: “I wish to represent the little guy, making Hawaii much friendlier to small businesses.”… GROWTH “We have to take the appropriate steps, ensuring we have a proper plan in place to grow responsibly.”; advocates construction of a hospital and/or high school to serve as a “center of the community.”

KEY MAUI ISSUES: ECONOMY Calls for tax credits, other incentives to encourage alternative energy use, decrease foreign oil dependence; Says more capital improvement projects should be advanced to create jobs: “This island is small, we all know of someone who has been affected by the recent layoffs.”

EH BRAH!

Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com To the jerks who decided to dump a taped-up cooler in a plastic bag in the ocean with a severed horse head inside, what is the deal? What purpose was served? What is the point? Just to let you know the cooler and horse head washed up on Admissions Day at DT Flemings and it stank literally and figuratively. Whoever did this is sick and needs help... mentally that is, assuming they haven’t already been rejected from Kahi Mohala.

(Challenger) NAME: George Fontaine (R) AGE: 47 YEARS ON MAUI: 29 PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE: Retired Maui Police Captain PRESIDENTIAL ENDORSEMENT: Decline to state KEY DISTRICT ISSUES: TRAFFIC Opposes widening of South Kihei Rd.; calls instead for a collector road between S. Kihei and Piilani Hwy. that incorporates a bike and footpath and greenway… EDUCATION “A school in South Maui will not only reduce traffic to Kahului, it will enable families to become more involved.”

KEY MAUI ISSUES: HEALTHCARE Calls medical liability reform “an absolute necessity” that will help “recruit and retain physicians.”; says doctors should be allowed to “charge a fair rate for their services as well as negotiate directly with insurance companies.”… EDUCATION “I believe the most serious problem facing our public schools is the Oahu-centralized control of the Department of Education. The first step to correcting this would be to decentralize the DOE and create local school boards.”

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MAUICOUNTY

BY ROB PARSONS ROBPARSONS@EARTHLINK.NET

8 Election ‘0

‘We lift up each other’

Maui Votes

Tasha Kama challenges Joe Souki’s quarter-century lock on District 8 seat rossing paths with Natalie “Tasha” Kama, candidate for the District 8 State House seat, is bound to leave a person reinstilled with faith in many things: The hope for responsible government; the opportunity to end the “old boy” system of local politics; and the over-riding hope that the Aloha Spirit of Hawaii may prevail.

Kama’s candidacy against incumbent Joe Souki appears to be the most formidable challenge he has faced in his 26-year tenure in the state legislature, a term that has rewarded Souki, 75, with powerful positions including House Majority Speaker and, most recently, chairmanship of the House Transportation Committee.

It was in this role that Rep. Souki entertained testimony on a special session legislative act to allow Hawaii Superferry to operate before preparation of an Environmental Impact Statement. Previously, Souki quashed legislation by refusing to hear the bill introduced by Maui’s Sen. Shan Tsustsui and Sen. Kalani English that would have tied launching the ferry service to the EIS. At the Kula Community Association’s Candidate Forum on August 12, Kama asked Souki why he had gone against the Maui County Council, Mayor and many constituents who called for an EIS. Souki replied that he took the advice of the State Department of Transportation.

“He should have read the law,” Kama told me, as we sat in a Wailuku café. “I don’t ever want to be in office so long that I don’t have to listen to the people who elected me.”

Reports that Hawaii Superferry donated $1,000 to Souki’s campaign fund barely raised an eyebrow among astute political observers. After all, 10 years ago Souki received $132,000 for his part in assisting developer Everett Dowling in selling land to Bishop Estate to build Kamehameha Schools. A 2002 Ethics Disclosure form reported another $40,016 from Dowling Company for consulting services. It also listed stock ownership with Maui Electric Company (729 shares) and Alexander & Baldwin (1,620 shares).

Kama has a long history of community organizing, establishing the

C

Photo by: Michael Gilbert

District 8 hopeful Tasha Kama.

Waiohuli-Keokea Hawaiian Homesteaders’ Association, Hui No Keola Pono, a Cameron Center non-profit, and founding Na Po`e Kokua (People Helpers), helping native Hawaiians with housing matters. This, in turn, gave birth to Hawaiian Community Assets, an award-winning organization that helps low- and moderate-income communities and individuals move toward economic self-sufficiency.

Kama, the daughter of Rev. Clarence Kamai, is herself an ordained minister and progressive pastor of the Christian Ministry church. She is the mother of eleven children, five of whom now live on the Mainland “with little hope for returning,” she says. This economic reality was pivotal in her decision to run for state office this year. Kama twice ran for the Office of Hawaiian Affairs at-large seats, and also vied for County Council in 2002.

tainability. We need a major policy shift to ramp up, hire talent and bring our university to the very top for teacher training, and to become a Stanford of the Pacific, a worldwide center for renewable energy technology R&D (research and development).

Investment in education is investment on our future. I support the Hawaii State Teachers Association in working to establish a “blue ribbon commission” to study where the $2 billion in our annual budget to the Department of Education is going. We also need to create change by involving kids, parents, the community and government.

That way we are affecting change from both the grassroots up and the top down. I love homegrown. We chant, we plan, we create our own destinies.

And we have to work the land. We have 500,000 acres of agricultural lands statewide that are viable.

MT: How would your style differ from that of the incumbent?

TK: I believe in transparency and accessibility. Why not hold community meetings? Ask the community their priorities before going into the legislative session. Meet before, during and after the legislature. Then people participate

and feel their part in ownership of the government for, by and of the people.

I’ve walked my district, door to door.

People want to be involved but don’t always feel included.

MT: What role does experience play in serving as a State House member? Can you be effective in moving forward key Maui issues as a freshman legislator?

TK: He started out once, too. I have years of experience with consensus building. I will be working with other Maui legislators to bring things home to our community. We have a different kind of culture here from Oahu. We are more community, huddled masses. I don’t have all the answers—nobody does. But being able to listen, learn and educate each other, we lift up each other. MTW WANT TO HEAR MORE? Go to www.mauitime.com for an election podcast.

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Maui Time: What prompted you to run for State House this year?

Tasha Kama: People are leaving Hawaii due to the rising cost of living. It’s a continuing exit, including my own family. People are worried about their jobs, especially in the tourist industry. We have to expand our economic base in areas that will help us be more sustainable. We have to work the land, and move to renewable energy sources that can generate higher levels of income within our state.

MT: What are your top three election issues this year, and what is your vision for addressing them?

TK: Economy, education, and sus-

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

7

ROBREPORT

BY ROB PARSONS ROBPARSONS@EARTHLINK.NET

LC Watch

The energy doctor

Court order

Dr. Steve Blake offers a renewable energy prescription “I’d put my money on the sun and solar energy. What a source of power! I hope we don’t have to wait ‘til oil and coal run out before we tackle that.”

—Thomas Edison own lush, winding Honopou Road on the ocean side of Hana Highway on Maui’s north shore, residents live beyond the reach of utility and water lines. These adventuresome jungle dwellers have engineered their own systems for living off the grid, with water catchment, solar and windpower to produce electricity, and other inventive ways to utilize available resources.

It’s not a lifestyle that suits everyone.

Even the narrow, bumpy road is a bit challenging to shock absorbers and nerves. Yet it encourages patience and courtesy as one vehicle pulls over to allow another to pass.

On a sunny Saturday morning, a half dozen cars pull into the driveway of Dr. Steve Blake, gathering for his monthly workshop titled How to Build Solar and Wind Power Systems. Blake is a Doctor of Holistic Health and prolific author, not an electrical engineer.

Nevertheless, he has such a broad understanding of renewable energy systems that friends encouraged him to share his knowledge with them.

Blake and his wife Catherine live cozily underneath towering mango trees on a ridge overlooking meandering Honopou Stream, in an area that once served as a rock quarry. A federally funded Reclamation Project in the 1930s under the Works Progress Administration (WPA) helped provide materials for road base to improve the Hana Highway.

Steve and “Cat” invite their guests to a small, screened dwelling they call “The Library.” There, they hook up a PowerPoint projector—which gets its juice from an array of solar panels—for the classroom portion of the workshop.

Those gathered include: A carpenter neighbor who lives on 100 percent solar power; a couple that lives off the grid eight miles toward Hana and is looking forward to hearing about the, “newest, latest, and greatest”; a lifelong sailor and self-described minimalist who lives without a refrigerator; a Lahaina realtor planning to build her “smart house” in an agricultural subdivision; a twentysomething Haiku resident interested in designing his own wind power system; and yours truly.

Blake also has sailing in his blood and has designed and built a 45-foot boat. He also constructed a wind generator on

Last week we started to tell you about a new development that could lead to changes in the way the LC operates. Then the bottom of the column arrived, necessitating a minor cliffhanger.

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AUGUST 28, 2008

their Honopou property, assembled with materials “available at Home Depot” and acquired for less than $200. He describes that his background includes studies in math and physics, in addition to years of studying health and nutrition. His latest book, Vitamins and Minerals Demystified, is published by McGraw-Hill. lake leads his group through the basics of solar and wind power systems. He covers solar cells, roof and ground mounting systems, charge controllers, battery storage, inverters, wind designs, backup generators and energy conservation.

The average American household consumes 28 kilowatt hours daily, he says, though he generally gets by on a fraction of that, less than 2 kWh a day.

Thus, he advocates energy efficiency, understanding what appliances are energy hogs, eliminating ghost loads and converting to power strips and energy efficient bulbs. Compact fluorescent light bulbs (CFLs) can reduce energy use by 75 percent, he says, and also produce much less heat than incandescent bulbs.

The tiny amount of mercury in CFLs shouldn’t be cause for concern, says Blake, and notes it is less dangerous than amounts found in swordfish or tuna.

CFLs can be properly recycled, and are likely to last for years before that becomes necessary. Maui Electric Company just announced $1 and $3

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

rebates on CFLs at selected stores, much like Hawaiian Electric has offered on Oahu for the past few years.

Blake’s enthusiasm for sharing conservation strategies brought about the creation of his new business, Power Efficiency Professionals. He now offers services for home and business energy audits, helping ratepayers formulate a plan to lower their electric bills. Armed with specific tools, a “Kill-a-Watt” meter and amperage clamp, he is able to pinpoint power usage and compute the potential savings that simple changes can bring.

Regarding solar panels, Blake notes that many installers position them at a 22-degree angle, corresponding with Hawaii’s latitude above the equator. He says he placed his own at 44 degrees, however, to maximize output in the winter months, when days are shorter and there is sometimes more cloud cover.

In the afternoon, Blake leads the group past a couple garden plots to his solar hot water panel. He invites everyone to carefully touch the copper pipe connected to the water tank to see how hot it gets.

Beyond that is his array of photovoltaic panels, all of them recycled from other systems, acquired for a fraction of their original cost and patched together to form an effective electrical power ENERGY: continued on page 10

Photo by: Catherine Blake

8

Dr. Steve Blake’s got the green cure for the petroleum blues.

So. Here’s the scoop, which was brought to our attention by Maui attorney Ben Lowenthal’s blog (http://hawaiiopinions.blogspot .com): An Oahu establishment called E&J Lounge was recently denied a liquor license by the Honolulu LC. E&J appealed the decision to the circuit court, claiming the LC had violated part of the Hawaii Administrative Procedures Act (HAPA). The exact details of the alleged violation are less important than one key definition: “contested case.” Based on legal precedent cited on Lowenthal’s blog, a contested case has to be required by law and has to determine “the rights, duties, or privileges of specific parties.”

In the end, the Hawaii Supreme Court found that that the LC’s denial was in fact a contested case and, this is the important part, judicial review was warranted. What does that mean in layman’s terms?

Essentially, the courts can now in theory start peering over the LC’s shoulder. Which is good.

Now, to dampen the excitement just a tad: All this is obviously more complicated than can be expressed in a few paragraphs (check out Lowenthal’s entry for a more complete explanation augmented by the requisite legalese). And even if it were as simple as it sounds, it’s not as if the LC is suddenly going to have its hands tied. The court’s ability to review, much less overturn, decisions will undoubtedly be limited.

But…it’s a start. And it should make for some interesting developments going forward. The next time the LC denies a license the establishment in question could have the right to a day in court.

We’ll keep you posted.

—Jacob Shafer

MAUICOUNTY

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

The business end A look at the week’s economic winners and losers…

Maui Land & Pineapple CEO David Cole has been getting a lot of ink in this space of late. For those who haven’t been paying attention: A few days after ML&P axed 274 workers, it came to light that Cole had been given a $4.1 million “compensation package,” representing more than half of the company’s 2007 profit.

As soon as the second part of the story broke, we tried to contact Cole for comment. He was “unavailable” and so we got spokeswoman Teri Freitas Gorman instead. Asked about her boss’s big payday, Gorman said it’s important to note the money wasn’t handed out in one lump sum but was the result of various bonuses and incentives that had been promised to Cole when he took the job.

According to information provided by Gorman, the $4.1 mil broke down like this: Salary Performance incentives (stock awards) Stock option awards (retention tool) Change in pension value All other compensation TOTAL

$550,000 $1,428,577 $1,024,604 $61,950 $1,069, 582 $4,134, 713

That ambiguously labeled “all other compensation” is essentially a make good on the loss in stock value that occurred between August 2003 when Cole signed on and October 2003 when his employment officially began.

OK, fine, so nobody wrote Cole a big novelty check for $4.1 million as he cackled maniacally and rubbed his hands together. Corporate dealings are never that simple and straightforward (except when they are). But still—the guy was given, through a combination of stock options and cash, enough money to feed several families for several years. Then, a few months later, his company made it a whole lot more difficult for 274 people to feed their families. Period, end of discussion.

Except we really hope it’s not the end of the discussion. Much as we appreciate Ms. Gorman taking the time the talk with us, what we really want is a few minutes of Mr. Cole’s time. The message for him, if he’s reading, is that we’re going to keep writing about him whether he speaks with us or not. He can only help his cause by giving us something to write about other than the layoffs and that big, fat bonus.

Ball’s in your court, David.

Kaheawa Wind Power, the company that runs the West Maui windmills, was given an “innovation award” by Gov. Lingle this week.

According to figures reported in Pacific Business News, the wind farm generated roughly the same amount of energy as 236,000 barrels of oil in 2007, creating enough juice to supply 9 percent of Maui’s power during peak hours and around 30 percent during non-peak hours.

Whatever aesthetic and wildlife endangerment complaints may have been lodged against the windmills, this is alternative power in action. As oil prices climb and Middle Eastern wars rage on, it’s tough to argue with that.

A couple weeks ago we told you about Hawaii Tourism Authority CEO Rex Johnson, who got himself in some hot water for sending adult material over the company e-mail. Looks like he’s off the hook, mostly. After a marathon seven-hour review session that may or may not have involved poring over the naughty e-mails in question, HTA’s board decided to keep Johnson, who’s been at the helm since 2002, though they did slash his annual salary from $240K to $200K, as reported in PBN. Not that Rex is gonna starve or anything, but man—those were some damn expensive e-mails. MTW

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ROBREPORT ENERGY: continued from page 8 source. Two of his largest panels are well over twenty years old and still work well.

Other than periodic maintenance, he notes, his power bill equals zero. solar photovoltaic system large enough to provide 18kWh would likely cost around $28,000 installed and perhaps $21,000 after tax credits and rebates, says Blake. After the initial investment, it could take eight years to reach the break-even point given current rates of around 40 cents per kilowatt-hour.

But Blake doesn’t think solar and wind systems should cost nearly so much. He directs the group to a 1996 book, Who Owns the Sun?, that relates how large utilities—along with petrochemical, coal, nuclear, banking and transportation industries—have conspired to block solar industry development, dating back to the Jimmy Carter era in the 1970s. Even now, 12 years after the book was published, solar tax credits and research are still political footballs and appear to be under the thumb of big oil interests and the politicians beholden to them.

Different solar cell technologies were covered, from the more expensive

A

monocrystaline to polycrystalline, now being manufactured in great quantity by China. The US demand for solar panels is so great that they are temporarily out of stock in some locations.

Blake also touches on solar Parabolic Trough Reflectors, which capture the sun’s heat and focus it on black steel pipes holding liquid salts. Superheated to as high as 400600 degrees Fahrenheit, the molten salts stored in insulated tanks produce steam to run a turbine, providing continuous, firm power. Blake says that a 100-megawatt facility in Andalusia, Spain is enough to power 100,000 Spanish households.

This would be an excellent energy solution for Maui, Blake believes. “All you need is the political will to set this up,” he says, “and what a good investment!”

A solar parabolic system could also pro-

duce hydrogen. “Someday,” says Blake, “we can use an alternative energy system like this to power all kinds of engines—our cars, mowers, weed-eaters, everything—all on hydrogen, with water vapor as the emissions.”

He says it makes no sense to manufacture hydrogen by using petrochemicals and cautions against using food for fuel.

Blake is excited by the myriad of designs available for wind power systems. He discussed pros and cons of several types including vertical axis turbines, which spin at slower revolutions per minute and are thus quieter.

He cautioned that in most cases it’s necessary to have a structural engineer inspect a wind turbine tower as well as rooftop mountings.

One obvious difference between wind and solar power is that solar has no moving parts.

Thus, wind systems must be designed with the understanding that some parts may cor-

rode or deteriorate with years of use.

Extremely high winds may also be problematic, such as the tropical storms and hurricanes that sometimes visit Hawaii.

But otherwise, wind power capacity increases greatly at higher wind speeds.

Doubling the wind speed from 10mph to 20mph can actually produce eight times as much power.

Blake’s encyclopedic knowledge of the topics he addresses keeps the class interesting and upbeat. He has already scheduled the next workshop for Saturday, September 20, from 10am-4pm. Presumably, attendees will visit their Primary Election polling places first and exercise another renewable resource—political power. MTW For more info call 572-8371, or e-mail windpower@naturalhealthwizards.com

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COCONUT WIRELESS THE WEEK IN REVIEW

BY JACOB SHAFER JACOB@MAUITIME.COM

reliability and security of its machines to get a piece of the $4 billion in government cheese freed up by the rather ironically dubbed Help America Vote Act of 2002. Even if Hart had a squeaky clean rep there would still be serious questions surrounding that giant contract.

Such as: should it be re-bid? A state administrative hearings officer recently said yes, ruling the contract was “clearly unreasonable” given that a rival outfit, Election Systems & Software, reportedly entered an $18 million bid. Hart has predictably appealed.

the job. OK, but the last time I went to Safeway in Kahului they tried to put my pineapple and bag of Maui onion potato chips in two separate plastic bags. The pineapple I guess is sorta heavy and awkward and poky, so I can almost understand the logic there.

But the bag of chips, as the name would imply, already comes in bag form; no need to add a second layer of synthetic coating to the proceedings. Plastic lovers can take heart, however—the ban isn’t set to take effect until 2011, giving opponents plenty of time to come up with creative ways to kill it.

THURSDAY, AUGUST 21

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 20 Voting machines have acquired a pretty bad reputation that’s only partly deserved. On the one hand, yes, the potential for behind-the-scenes “tinkering” (read: cheating) is very real. On the other hand, the same could be said of more prosaic vote counting methods— are we really going to argue that humans are incorruptible? Election fraud is as old as elections. The key is to create a paper trail so there’s something to go back and check if shenanigans are suspected. All that being said, scrutiny is clearly a must when dealing with something like the $43 million contract Hawaii entered into with electronic voting giant Hart InterCivic for use of the company’s machines through 2016. That’s the same Hart InterCivic that was the target of a lawsuit brought by a former technicianturned-whistleblower. The suit, filed in 2007 and unsealed earlier this year, accuses the company of lying about the

The New xD Release the Deviant

We’ve enjoyed a few raindrops fallin’ on our heads of late so it’s easy to go all short-term memory loss and pretend the water picture is rosy. It’s not. The National Weather Service reports that Kahului has gotten just 26 percent of its average rainfall for the year. That lines up pretty closely with county- and statewide figures. And things aren’t going to get better, or wetter, anytime soon—NWS’s Climate Prediction Center has the odds tipped heavily toward Maui experiencing less-thannormal precipitation possibly all the way to Christmas. Officials are calling for you and me to embrace voluntary rationing. I’m in. But how about a couple golf courses and/or resorts step up to lead the charge by volunteering to reduce their gluttonous consumption? What was that? Oh sorry, I must have drifted off to dreamland…

FRIDAY, AUGUST 22 The County Council gave final approval today to a bill that will bar Maui stores and restaurants from using plastic bags. In an era when our crippling reliance on petroleum is basically the root of all evil and our landfills are choked with trash, this kind of mini-sacrifice seems like a no-brainer. But…no.

Retailers have revolted (though none spoke at today’s council meeting), claiming that nonmandatory measures encouraging people to use paper and reusable bags are already doing

SATURDAY, AUGUST 23 Joe Biden it is. A fine pick if an unadventurous and somewhat bland one. His smiling mug does add a dose of white-haired gravitas and blue collar Caucasian-ness to the campaign posters (sad that still matters, but…).

And despite his vote to authorize the Mesopotamian quagmire, the senior Senator from Delaware’s got a decent record. So no major complaints here. But did we really need the week of bobbing and weaving, the seventh grade-level “I know but I won’t tell” cat and mouse games? Obama has certainly demonstrated that he understands political theater and knows how to whip the media into a frenzy. But when your opponent is (stupidly) comparing you to Paris Hilton, maybe telling the nation “I’ll text you l8r” isn’t the best way to unveil your number two. I like the youthfulness, I like the exuberance, I like the 21st century mindset—but sometimes it’s not a bad idea to just play it old school. Which, I guess, is where Biden comes in.

SUNDAY, AUGUST 24 Checked my voicemail today—shortly after hosting a Maui Time photo shoot in my backyard—and got an “anonymous tip” that Obama had made his veep selection, sent like a full 36 hours after the story broke. Seriously, I’m not making that up. The dude also said he had “proof” that Obama was in fact born in

Kenya and was later whisked away to Oahu with a falsified birth certificate (a debunked accusation that’s even staler than that other “scoop”). I called back three times ‘cause I wanted to find out how deep this rabbit hole went (and I was bored) but got a busy signal.

Maybe the government cut his phone line…

Also got word this evening from the County that the Wailea fire was 95 percent contained, thanks to the diligent work of emergency crews and a few Maui Meadows residents who offered up their swimming pools so helicopter water drops could continue throughout the night. No doubt self-interest was one major motivator there, but still— always nice when everybody pitches in.

MONDAY, AUGUST 25 Congrats to the band of preteen ballplayers from Waipio, Oahu that did Hawaii proud by bringing home a Little League World Series title, beating Matamoros, Mexico 12-3. That’s the Aloha State’s second Little League championship in the last four years; a club from Ewa Beach, Oahu won it all in 2005. As a former Little Leaguer turned over-the-hill couch surfer, I salute these lads with nostalgia and a tinge of misplaced envy.

TUESDAY, AUGUST 26 Political junkies who don’t like to swim in the mainstream or who crave a counterbalance to the flashing graphics and blathering talking heads of the CNN/FOX/MSNBC set should tune to Akaku, Maui’s community access station. They’ll be airing coverage of the Democratic and Republican National Conventions courtesy of Democracy Now!, Amy Goodman’s grassroots, slanted-butlevel, truth-to-power program. Kudos to President Jay April and all the folks at Akaku for continuing to provide Maui with a solid, dynamic media alternative. Catch these airings on channel 54: DNC coverage, August 29, 5-7am, 5-7pm; RNC coverage, September 1-5, 5-7am, 5-7pm. MTW

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t was only last year that one could zip over to Oahu or Molokai for around 30 bucks each way. Those who wanted to party or see family on other islands over Labor Day weekend could do so at a cost that now seems decades removed from the current price tag. Even Superferry rates have nearly doubled in recent weeks. While a tight economy, high fuel prices, etc. make long-distance travel unfeasible for many, relief may come in the form of a cumbersome buzz word: the stay-cation.

Were this Ohio or Kansas, the concept would be a tad insulting: ditch those plans for a Florida beach vacation, screw the Grand Canyon and head instead to see the birthplace of Millard Fillmore or the tri-state area’s largest mashed potato Jesus.

Why? Because you’re broke and/or you can’t get the time off. Good Morning America types push the idea of the stay-cation as a low-budget replacement for the traditional summer vacay. We get it—times are tough. But do we really need to sugarcoat the grim status of our economy with a perky euphemism?

Well, fortunately for us, even the most mundane activity on Maui still looks more or less like a tropical island getaway to someone from, say, Milwaukee. Think about those unbeatable mountain views you get when heading out for a sixer.

Even if you think you’ve repeatedly seen everything this island has to offer, some offbeat local destinations and activities may provide a means of escape (estaype?) for you this Labor Day weekend.

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AUGUST 28, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

VOLUNTOURISM

POOR MAN’S HANA

While this planet (and this article) could do without another mashed-together, punladen franken-word, it can sure use a few able-bodied individuals to help clean it up a bit. Environmental organizations have seized upon the concept of volunteering on vacation for some time, but the idea has really caught on in the past year or two.

“We have collected a phenomenal amount of litter,” said Pacific Whale Foundation communications director Anne Rillero.

So far this year 592 people have spent at least three hours each picking up litter, pulling invasive plants and even planting native species.

Volunteers keep a tally on what they pick up. During the first three months of this year alone they collected 13, 509 cigarette butts, 4,710 plastic bits, 338 light bulbs (light bulbs? Really?), 1,096 aluminum cans, 773 glass bottles, 844 plastic beverage containers, 933 plastic bags and thousands of other discarded remnants of consumerism.

“When you add it all up it really has a huge impact,” Rillero said.

Through PWF volunteers can sign up to pull weeds and clear brush as part of a Maui Coastal Land Trust inland fishpond restoration project every Friday. This is pretty much what President Bush does at the ranch on his many R&Rs, but you’ll have better views and a clearer conscience.

Saturdays feature similar work through Malama Honokawai. The restoration takes place in the remote Honokawai Valley, which is not accessible to the public; hence, this a real chance to escape the well-traveled trails that will no doubt receive a trampling or two this long weekend.

Then there’s Ho Aloha Aina, which does its work along a new Oceanside trail each Monday in Kihei.

Volunteer opportunities are scattered throughout the week, and locations include Kanaha Beach and Haleakala.

Participants need to bring sunscreen, food, water and proper clothing, but even so the price tag for a few days of volunteer work runs well short of roundtrip ticket to Oahu. You even get a free T-shirt for volunteering, and given the weird things I have seen people do for T-shirts, this may attract a few unlikely voluntourists.

Herein lies proof that one need not book a triple-figure tour, or even invest in a full tank of gas, in order to take in the Valley Isle’s intense history and mind-blowing beauty.

Even the clunkiest of Maui cruisers can make it to I’ao Valley State Park, which is nestled in the northeast quadrant of the West Maui Mountains, just northwest of Wailuku town.

Plus, it costs you nothing to get in.

The park houses not only a dramatic example of the geological forces at play on the Hawaiian Isles, but also the site of one the most important battles in Hawaiian history, Kepaniwai, during which Kamehameha I conquered the Maui army.

The place is cooler (temperaturewise) than most spots on-island and features a swimming hole.

Sure, you will see a fair share of tour buses chock full of pallid Mainlanders, but this should reinforce the sense of how lucky you are to reside here in spite of the ridiculous cost of living.

EDU-STAY-TION: LABOR DAY REVEALED Fellow Chicago transplants may recall Casimir Pulaski Day. We may not have been entirely aware of Mr. Pulaski’s accomplishments, but what we did know was that we got a three-day weekend because of them. The same went, frankly, for Labor Day. Yet given our current epoch, and indeed the conditions that created the need for stay-cations, we may want to look at the idea behind Labor Day a little more closely this time around.

“It plays a bigger role this year because of what’s happening with our economic situation,” said William Kennison, Director of the International Longshoremen and Warehouse Union’s Maui County Chapter, referring to ailing industries and the resultant mass layoffs the islands have recently been seeing with unsettling frequency.

To coincide with elections, the ILWU and the Hawaii AFL-CIO jointly sponsor a Labor Day celebration every other year, Kennison said. The celebration will take place 10am Sunday at the Wailuku Community Center. Slated to show up this year are US Representatives Mazie Hirono (D-HI) and Neil Abercrombie (D-HI).

Yet Kennison said the real purpose of the event is, much like the Labor Day holiday itself, to recognize and celebrate Maui’s workers. Live entertainment will include Napua Grieg, Unified Soul and Mondo Kane.

On island, the ILWU represents workers from industries that include sugar, pineapple, trucking, tourism and health care.

Countywide, ILWU membership exceeds 8,000.

The celebration is free for union members past and present as well as their families. Yet even if you’re not part of ILWU or AFL-CIO, it may be worthwhile to bring the kids down so they can get a solid understanding of why they get a three-day weekend in late August/early September.

By the way, Casimir Pulaski was a Polish nobleman who immigrated to America when it was still larval and became a general in the Continental Army during the Revolutionary War.

HOME ON THE RANGE You by no means have to stay inside this Labor Day weekend if union gatherings and pulling weeds aren’t what you’re into. In fact, you can forget all about our current economic woes and environmental state and get jettisoned back to a simpler time, all at the foot of the West Maui Mountains.

The county-run Ukumehame Firing Range hosts a number of sporting clubs, each packing the caliber of its choice—from the kind of weaponry Rambo would sport to that which Billy the Kid likely toted around the badlands of New Mexico.

While non-club members are limited to public open days (there are four per month), and have to furnish their own weaponry and paper targets, according to Valley Isle Sports Club President Burt Swink anyone can come check out the Single Action Shooting Society shoot-out, which takes place at the range this Saturday.

Members of the SASS get “duded-out,” as Swink puts it, in Old West garb and compete using revolvers, lever action rifles and shotguns. They are judged on speed and accuracy and use only firearms dating back to Tombstone’s heyday or exact replicas thereof.

Ukumehame firing range is located off the Mauka side of Honoapiilani Highway just before Olowalu if you’re coming from the east.

If you’re interested, call 270-7232 for times and other information.

BOOZIN’ DOWN THE STREET Maui, if you haven’t noticed, is home to a boozing monument we lovingly refer to as Bar-muda Triangle. Now, boozing is by no means an original or offbeat way to spend Labor Day weekend prima facie, but the style with which one does so can achieve comic and/or authentic heights with a little effort.

Since we are on stay-cation, let’s focus on hitting the sauce on the cheap.

Golf course-like in its layout, the triangle is home to several bars, most of which have some kind of kama’aina and/or happy hour deal. Labor Day weekend is conducive to bar crawls given its extra recovery day. Not sure where to start? The following plan of action can help you get the most of the long weekend.

A good start would be Kahale’s Beach Club since happy hour starts at 10am here.

Since drinking at 10 am already puts you in a “why-not” state of mind, why not go for a $2.50 mai-tai? The next stop sits across the parking lot: Tiki Lounge. Their kama’aina specials start at 11am and get this: all food and drink is half off, granted you can furnish proof of Hawaii residency. Next: Lulu’s. They’re doing happy hour all day this week, which means you can watch your pool game disintegrate while sipping $3 mai-tais. After Lulu’s comes the obligatory dollar (!) mai-tai session at Life’s a Beach. The next leg involves zigzagging your way to Dog and Duck, whose happy hour begins at three and involves cheap domestic draughts (sick, as you must be by now, of maitais). If you are headed north for some pre-Little Beach shut-eye you may want to hit up Tip-Ups to see what kind of deal you can get if your designated driver hasn’t completely lost his or her patience yet. Note: Remember to take vitamin B-12 before heading out and drink copious amounts of water throughout.

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E-STAY-PING THE EVERYDAY For most inhabitants of the United States, Labor Day signifies the waning of warmth, the end of a season that can define an entire year. Combine that with economic foreboding and pundits’ suggestion that you spend summer vacation reorganizing your sock drawer and you have a potentially depressing long weekend for many. Among other things, we have sunshine, amazing physical and cultural landscapes and, if we want, cheap booze to help us weather the tough times, not to mention some of the best beaches on the planet (many of which are accessible by bus if high gas prices get you down). Indeed, if there is an ideal place to take a permanent stay-cation, it’s Maui. MTW

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Zip service Zippy’s comes to Maui—and gets a warm welcome t’s safe to say Maui was ready for Zippy’s. Several days after the Oahu-based chain cut the ribbon on its Kahului location, the parking lot was jammed and the wait for a table was half an hour.

Just getting takeout required queuing up in a rather imposing line that snaked all the way to the entrance.

Anyone familiar with this popular island eatery knows you don’t come to Zippy’s for the ambiance but rather for fast, hearty, economically friendly fare at any hour of the day or night. But the new branch has a nice look and feel, with high ceilings, lots of natural light and rows of comfortable-looking booths.

We didn’t have much time to enjoy any of that, however, as we bellied up to the takeout counter along with dozens of fellow diners.

After a not exactly zippy—but respectable given the packed house—wait, we exited with several bags stuffed with lunchtime grinds.

The best advice one can offer about

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a trip to Zippy’s (advice I was thankfully given prior to my maiden voyage) is to come hungry. The portions are ample and the food sticks to your ribs. The teri burger came loaded with grilled onions and

lunch special, featuring fried chicken, beef, katsu etc. augmented by a scoop of rice or fries and mac or tossed salad. The mini is big, the regular is bigger.

The Chinese chicken salad, topped with pork and imitation crab in addition to the titular meat, got a big thumbs-up

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for its crisp leafy lettuce and fine mix of flavors. And for those looking to go totally veggie centric there are a number of options, including a tofu plate, vegetarian chili and the veggie burger (which, our resident vegan noted, does contain eggs).

Odds are things’ll calm down a bit as Maui gets used to its shiny new Zippy’s. In another week or two you’ll probably even be able to get a table without a wait. The thing that assuredly won’t change is the food— and for people who heed the sage advice outlined a few paragraphs back and arrive with tummies a rumblin’, that’s decidedly good news. MTW

delicious slabs of teriyaki-soaked beef.

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16

AUGUST 28, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

ART&ENTERTAINMENT

BY JEN RUSSO JEN@MAUITIME.COM

Paws-pitality Maui resorts offer dog-friendly accommodations utrageous airfares, rising gas prices and the high cost of living in paradise are stifling my desire to visit exotic worldwide destinations. On top of that, I have two small dogs I insist on bringing everywhere that present even more logistical challenges.

They have done several trips on the Molokai Ferry, made inter-island flights, stayed in cabins in Hana—they’re part of the family and love to go. But traveling with them can be expensive and cumbersome. With that in mind, this year I decided to stay close to home and to find a local hotel that would accommodate my four-legged companions.

With more people wanting to travel with their animals, more resorts are allowing small dogs on property. At the same time, an increasing number of resorts are offering Kama’aina rates to attract residents. The cost of boarding your dog can run around $30 a day, so tossing that back into the budget boosts the bottom line. I found three big resorts

O

on Maui that allow small dogs: the Fairmont Kea Lani and the Four Seasons in Wailea and the Westin Maui Resort in Kaanapali. On Lana’i, just a short ferry ride away, you can also shack up with your dogs at the Lodge at Koele and the Manele Bay Hotel. All these

DOG FRIENDLY RESORTS IN MAUI COUNTY Westin Maui Resort and Spa Kaanapali (808) 662-2753; Kama’aina Rates: $179 golf/mtn view, $240 ocean view Four Seasons Resort Maui at Wailea (808) 874-8000; Kama’aina Rates: $295 Fairmont Kea Lani (808) 875-2227; Kama’aina Rates: $275 Lodge at Koele & Manele Bay Hotel (800) 321-4666; Kama’aina Rates: $229-$269

resorts require that your pooch weigh less than 15 pounds. And they all offer discounts for Hawaii residents.

With reservations in hand I packed up the family and headed to the Westin.

Featuring daily breakfast and dinner specials Big Wave offers a unique blend of casual American cuisine blended with contemporary island flavors.

Upon check-in we signed a waiver that promised we would clean up after our pets, keep them leashed and quiet, etc. The dogs were not invited to dine at any of the restaurants but we could leave them in the room provided they didn’t bark their heads off, or pick up food and eat with them outdoors. These were all terms I could live with. We got changed and headed for the pool.

The Westin’s pool area is a gorgeous expanse of chlorination, with slides, waterfalls and caves. The poolside staff led by director Jack Stone really made our trip; they’re always close at hand to meet your refreshment needs. We took advantage of their great selection of food and beverages, keeping the kids happy with favorites like fries and hot dogs while I spent the afternoon working through a veggie platter,

cheeseburger, Ceaser salad and Bikini Blondes, all without leaving my chair.

Everybody loved the dogs and wanted to pet them. The Westin dog welcoming committee brought thick soft beds to our rooms with their insignia “Heavenly Dog Beds.”

(And heavenly they were!) They also brought water and food dishes that fit neatly into a mat to minimize mess, plus a “goodie bag” with plastic bags, gloves and treats. It was red carpet treatment for the dogs. They jumped right on their beds and wondered what I was going to order them from room service.

Little did they know I packed their usual crunchies. Pampering has its limits. MTW

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Serving Daily 7:30am to 9:00pm 4299 L. Honoapiilani Hwy.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

17

FILMCRITIQUE

BY COLE SMITHEY COLE@MAUITIME.COM

Terrorist sympathizer Don Cheadle goes on a suicide mission—and it’s genius on Cheadle turns in yet another tour de force performance this time as Samir Horn, a former U.S. Military operative closely connected to a terrorist group committed to executing bombing missions around the globe.

D

Traitor

★★★★★ Rated PG-13/104 min.

Writer/director Jeffrey Nachmanoff crafts a taut thriller that delves deeply into the mindset and methods of a terrorist cell intent on striking ongoing fear into the hearts of the western world.

Disenfranchised and polarized, Samir acts on his interpretation of Muslim beliefs that disguise his buried motivations. A team of FBI agents led by

Australian actor Guy Pearce as agent Roy Clayton close in on Samir as his cell plans a devastating synchronized attack on America.

Traitor is an intense and highly politicized film that dares to look at more than a few sides of an ideological battle that rages throughout the world.

The stinging dramatic tone of Traitor comes through in Samir’s calling one of his FBI interrogators a “genius” as he throws their holier-than-thou rhetoric about his killing innocent civilians in their face as standard operating procedure for U.S. military tactics. The word cuts to the quick of the U.S. war on Afghanistan to secure the world’s biggest untapped oil reserves in Kazakhstan—a reality that you don’t hear about on NPR, let alone any other major media outlet. The phony hunt for Osama?

Genius. Spending upwards of $13 trillion on an Iraq war that has bankrupted the country and increased the Middle Eastern terrorist threat a thousand fold? Genius. Never before has cynical irony been so fleetly expressed in a single word, for it simultaneously synthesizes and deconstructs the

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

brainwash propaganda that the World Bank has systematically filtered through every political and media outlet for as far back as our short term memory serves.

It takes more than two thirds of the movie to find out who Samir Horn is to himself because our alternating perception of him as a terrorist or a double undercover agent remains at odds with the way he cares about people near him. Born in Sudan, where he witnessed his father being blown up by a car bomb, Samir moved to the States where his Muslim beliefs clashed with his duties working as an operations officer for the feds that fired him. So he packed his bag and went to work as an arms dealer to terrorist organizations. Samir gets nabbed and tossed in prison, but he instinctively knows whom to befriend and doesn’t stay there long.

A suicide bomb in Spain attracts the attention of a couple good-cop-bad-cop FBI wonks whose detective work is as spot-on as it is myopic. Samir teams up with an elite terrorist organization and proves his mettle by executing a bombing mission at the U.S. consulate in Nice. The job sets him up as the

Man, did I leave the oven on? point man to orchestrate a multi-faceted suicide mission in the heartland designed to make Americans feel even more insecure than they already do.

Traitor is a thriller that plays with ambiguity as a suspense device to link its equally amoral characters. In this way, it’s a modern film noir that uses flashes of spectacle to blot out the shadows of lurking motivations that its characters hide. It’s unexpected to discover that comedian Steve Martin collaborated on the story Nachmanoff, whose vision for the film presages another generation of smart thrillers following on the heels of the Jason Bourne films and the groundbreaking Syriana. The common subtext is that we’re in way over our heads, genius. MTW

MOVIECAPSULES

BY KATE BRADSHAW CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

SHOWTIMES

LOOKING FOR

GIRLS

IN KAHULUI?

Maui Film Festival Castle Theater, 572-3456 Man On Wire - PG13 - 5, 7:30

Front Street Theater

‘Hamlet 2’: it’s like ‘High School Musical,’ only weirder. And not crappy.

Maui Film Festival’s Candlelight Cinema MAN ON WIRE - PG13 - Documentary - A documentary on Frenchman Philippe Petit’s risky and illegal walk on a tightrope strung between the Twin Towers in 1974. 90 min.

(Kate Bradshaw)

New This Week BABYLON A.D. - PG13 - Action - Vin Diesel plays a man on a mission in this post-apocalyptic what-have-you. His mission gets thrown off course, as you might imagine, when he discovers the more sinister implications of his task. Explosions are expected. 90 min. (KB) BOTTLE SHOCK - PG13 - Comedy - It’s California’s wine country in the seventies. A British wine snob in pursuit of Napa Valley’s finest vintage stumbles upon an intriguing father and son-run winery, which produces the best Chardonnay around. Family tension and young love provide subplots that may appeal to some. 108 min. (KB) COLLEGE - R - Comedy - Three high school seniors check out a college for a weekend and end up being taken in by- you guessed it- the wildest frat on campus. 94 min. (KB) DISASTER MOVIE - PG13 - Comedy Another “insert-premise-here” attempt to lampoon pop culture. Degree of humor found here is presumably directly proportional to number of paint cans huffed prior to viewing. 90 min. (KB) HAMLET 2 - R - Comedy - A high school drama teacher (Steve Coogan) on the brink of failure finds a way to revive his career: by producing a sequel to Shakespeare’s most wellknown tragedy. There is even a sexy Jesus involved, which is pretty much enough to carry any movie. 92 min. (KB) TRAITOR - PG13 - Drama - An FBI CIA agent sets out on the winding trail of a former Special Operations officer (Don Cheadle) with alleged ties to terrorist groups. He comes to find out that things are not as they seem. 114 min. (KB)

Now Showing

serves as former Limp Bizkit singer Fred Durst’s directorial debut. Hmmm. It follows the rise of the young girl who became the first female to compete in the Pop Warner football tournament. 94 min.

MAMA MIA - PG13 - Comedy - ABBA returns with a vengeance in this screen adaptation of the musical that put a skip in the step of dancing queens around the world. 98 min.

MIRRORS - R - Horror - Kiefer Sutherland plays an ex-cop whose family is tormented by ghosts that dwell inside the mirrors of their home. This high-tension flick was adapted from a South Korean film by The Hills Have Eyes director Alexandre Aja. 110 min.

THE MUMMY: TOMB OF THE DRAGON EMPEROR - PG13 - Action - Apparently the third in a series involving embalmed and ornery ancient monarchs, the newest Mummy turn looks to ancient China for its backdrop. After accidentally waking a cursed Han Emperor (Jet Li) from his 2,000 year sleep, explorer Rick O’Connell (Brendan Fraser) ends up being charged with stopping the undead from pursuing world domination. 114 min.

PINEAPPLE EXPRESS - R - Comedy - This stoner/action/comedy flick is the latest Judd Apatow project. It involves a pot head who unwittingly witnesses a murder and the subsequent paranoid flight of said witness and his pot dealer. Think Superbad with guns. 111 min.

THE ROCKER - PG13 - Comedy - Rainn Wilson of ‘The Office’ fame stars as a loser former drummer of ‘80s hair band Vesuvius. He attempts to regain his glory when he hears his teenaged nephew’s band needs a drummer for their high school prom gig. 102 min.

STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS - PG Animation - Anakin and Obi Wan now must deal with warring clones. Sounds familiar. This time it’s animated. 90 min.

TROPIC THUNDER - R - Comedy - The cast of a Nam flick in-the-making finds itself having to go from fantasy to reality after a series of mishaps.

Plenty of room for brilliant satire. 106 min.

VICKY CRISTINA BARCELONA - PG13 Comedy - Woody Allen’s latest edition, this flick follows the romantic misadventures of two young American women (played by Scarlett Johansson and Rebecca Hall) spending the summer in Spain. Also stars Javier Bardem and Penelope Cruz. 96 min.

THE DARK KNIGHT - PG13 - Action - The lines between good and evil, right and wrong are blurred in this film as Batman struggles with his morals in the fight to defeat the Joker. As far as I’m concerned those boys can fight all they want as long as Batman shows up in that skin-tight, black leather suit. 152 min.

DEATH RACE - R - Action - Prisoners from a not-too-distant dystopian future are forced to compete in big scary car races. Champion racer Jensen Ames (Jason Stratham) gets framed for murder and sent to prison to compete in said races. 89 min.

THE HOUSE BUNNY - PG13 - Comedy - A recently-ousted Playboy bunny somehow ends up living among a sorority of dumpy girls. Determined to bestow hotness upon them, she learns a few lessons of her own.

Hmmm. 97 min.

THE LONGSHOTS - PG13 - Comedy Apparently based on a true story, this film

900 Front Street, Lahaina, 249-2222 (Matinees: M-F until 6:30pm, Sa-Su until 3:30pm, Discount Tue), Babylon A.D. - PG13 - F 4:15, 7:15, 9:45. Sa-M 1:45, 4:15, 7:15, 9:45. Tu-W 4:15, 7:15, 9:45.

Death Race - R - Th 4:15, 7:15, 9:45. F 3:45, 6:45, 9:15. Sa-M 1:45, 3:45, 6:45, 9:15. Tu-W 3:45, 6:45, 9:15.

Disaster Movie - PG13 - F 4, 7, 9:30. Sa-M 1:30, 4, 7, 9:30. Tu-W 4, 7, 9:30.

The House Bunny - PG13 - Th 4, 7, 9:30. F 3:30, 6:30, 9. Sa-M 1, 3:30, 6:30, 9. Tu-W 3:30, 6:30, 9.

Mirrors - R - 3:45, 6:45, 9:25 Star Wars:The Clone Wars - PG - 3:30, 6:30, 9

Ka’ahumanu 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 875-4910 (Matinees: everyday until 4pm), Babylon A.D. - PG13 - 11:30, 1:35, 3:40, 5:45, 7:50, 9:55 The Dark Knight - PG13 - 12, 3:10, 6:30, 9:40 Death Race - R - 12:30, 2:50, 5:10, 7:30, 9:50 The House Bunny - PG13 - 11:05, 1:20, 3:35, 5:50, 8:05, 10:20 Mama Mia - PG13 - F-M 1, 3:25, 5:50, 8:15, 10:35. Tu-W 1, 3:35, 6:10, 9.

The Rocker - PG13 - 11 Traitor - PG13 - 11:45, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45

Lingerie Night!

Monday & Tuesday

$2 Domestic Beers

• Maui’s Most Beautiful Girls • The Greatest Pu-Pus • New Faces & Management • Maui’s Hottest Nights!

DIANE’S Club

SPORTS BAR KARAOKE

Kukui Mall 1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 ( Matinees: everyday until 4pm), Babylon A.D. - PG13 - F-M 12:15, 2:35, 4:50, 7:05, 9:20. Tu-W 2:35, 4:50, 7:05, 9:20.

The Rocker - PG13 - 5:45, 8, 10:15 Star Wars: The Clone Wars - PG - F-M 11, 1:15, 3:30. Tu-W 1:15, 3:30.

Traitor - PG13 - F-M 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30, 10. Tu-W 2:30, 5, 7:30, 10.

Tropic Thunder - R - F-M 12:30, 2:45, 5, 7:15, 9:30. Tu-W 2:45, 5, 7:15, 9:30.

350 HOOHANA ST. • KAHULUI Next to Oceanic Cable

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CALL 205-8778 AND ASK ABOUT FREE TRANSPORTATION TO AND FROM CLUB DIANE!

Maui Mall Megaplex Maui Mall, 249-2222 (Matinees: M-Th until 6pm, F-Su until 3:30pm), Bottle Shock - PG13 - F 1:20, 4, 6:40, 9:20. SaM 1:20, 4, 6:40, 9:20. Tu-W 4, 6:40, 9:20.

College - R - F 12, 2:20, 4:45, 7:10, 9:50. Sa-M 12, 2:20, 4:45, 7:10, 9:50. Tu-W 2:20, 4:45, 7:10, 9:50.

Disaster Movie - PG13 - F 12:30, 2:50, 5:10, 7:10, 9:40. Sa-M 12:30, 2:50, 5:10, 7:25, 9:40. TuW 2:50, 5:10, 7:25, 9:40.

Hamlet 2 - R - Th 2:40, 5, 7:20, 9:40. F 12:20, 2:40, 5, 7:20, 9:40. Sa-M 12:20, 2:40, 5, 7:20, 9:40. Tu-W 2:40, 5, 7:20, 9:40.

The Longshots - PG13 - Th 2:45, 5, 7:25, 9:35. F 12:30, 2:45, 4:55, 7:15, 9:35. Sa-M 12:30, 2:45, 4:55, 7:15, 9:35. Tu-W 2:45, 4:55, 7:15, 9:35.

Mirrors - R - Th 1:40, 4:20, 7, 9:40. F 1:40, 4:20, 7, 9:40. Sa-M 1:40, 4:20, 7, 9:40. Tu-W 1:40, 4:20, 7, 9:40.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor PG13 - Th 1:55, 3:45, 4:35, 6:30, 7:10, 9:10, 9:55.

F 1:10, 3:45, 6:30, 9:10. F . Sa-M 1:10, 3:45, 6:30, 9:10. Tu-W 3:45, 6:30, 9:10.

Pineapple Express - R - Th 1:30, 3:40, 4:10, 6:20, 6:50, 9, 9:30. F 1:30, 4:10, 6:50, 9:30. Sa-M 1:30, 4:10, 6:50, 9:30. Tu-W 1:30, 4:10, 6:50, 9:30.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars - PG - Th 1:30, 2:25, 3:50, 4:50, 6:15, 7:15, 8:40, 9:40. F 1:30, 3:50, 6:15, 8:40. Sa-M 1:30, 3:50, 6:15, 8:40. Tu-W 1:30, 3:50, 6:15, 8:40.

Tropic Thunder - R - Th 1:45, 2:30, 4:15, 5, 6:45, 7:30, 9:15, 9:55. Th 1:30, 3:40, 4:10, 6:20, 6:50, 9, 9:30. F 12, 1:45, 2:30, 4:15, 5, 6:45, 7:30, 9:15, 9:55. Sa-M 12, 1:45, 2:30, 4:15, 5, 6:45, 7:30, 9:15, 9:55. Tu-W 1:45, 2:30, 4:15, 5, 6:45, 7:30, 9:15, 9:55.

Vicky Cristina Barcelona - PG13 - Th 2:05, 4:30, 6:55, 9:20. F 2:05, 4:30, 6:55, 8:20. Sa-M 2:05, 4:30, 6:55, 9:20. Tu-W 2:05, 4:30, 6:55, 9:20.

Wharf Cinema Center

Wed.. 9/03 5 :000 & 7:30pm

MauiFilmFestival.com m $100 w/pass

658 Front Street, 249-2222 (Matinees: Tue all shows, until 6pm every other day), The Longshots - PG13 - Th 1:45, 4:30, 7, 9:30. F 1:45, 4:30, 7, 9:30. Sa-Su 11:15, 1:45. 4:30, 7, 9:30. M 11:15, 1:45, 4:30, 7, 9:30. Tu-W 1:45, 4:30, 7, 9:30.

The Rocker - PG13 - Th 2, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. F 2, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. Sa-Su 11:30, 2, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45.

Sa-Su 2, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. M 11:30, 2, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. Tu-W 2, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45.

Tropic Thunder - R - Th 1:30, 4, 6:30, 9:15. F 1:30, 4, 6:30, 9:15. Sa-Su 11, 1:30, 4, 6:30, 9:15.

M 11, 1:30, 4, 6:30, 9:15. Tu-W 1:30, 4, 6:30, 9:15.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

19

142 HANA HWY, PAIA

808-573-8085 Restaurant

www.charleyspaia.com

ALL ACCESS ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS THURSDAY AUGUST 28 Music 10 PM - Close $10 COVER FRIDAY AUGUST 29 Music 10 PM - Close $5 COVER SATURDAY AUGUST 30 Japanese Dub Reggae show with Dry and Heavy feauturing:

COYOTE UGLY

VINCE ESQUIRE BAND

the “K” LIKKLE INNA MAI and VISION

Music 10 PM - Close $20 COVER

SPECIAL GUEST:

SUNDAY AUGUST 31

HAWAIIAN NIGHTS

Music 7-10PM NO COVER

FEATURING HENRY & ALAN KOA

TUESDAY SEPTEMBER 2

VOTED MAUI’S BEST MUSICIAN

$5 COVER

KANOA OF GOMEGA

Music 10 PM - Close

WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 3 Music 10 PM - Close

$5 COVER

FUNK AND JAZZ WITH

THESPECIAL FLYINGGUEST: SHEEPKAREN PROBLEM B

FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 5TH

B.U.B.Z. PRODUCTIONZ PRESENTZ

TEOMON Higher Calling CD release party

Lahaina side www.GiovanisEntertainment.com

MONDAYS

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NE

10pm $7

10-12PM INSIDE ON STAGE

No Cover $5 Cover

THURSDAYS 10PM

SILKY RINGO

SILKY RINGO

NO

SATURDAY 30th

20% KAMA’AINA MAUI RESIDENTS RECEIVE:

10pm $7

661-3160 20

AUGUST 28, 2008

COVER

2291 KA‘ANAPALI PKWY Above Jonny’s Burger Joint

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

CANNOT BE USED WITH ALL ACCESS OR IN COMBINATION WITH ADDITIONAL DISCOUNT PROGRAMS. VALID ID REQUIRED.

OFF

ALL FOOD, NON- ALCOHOL BEVERAGE AND NON-CHARITY MERCHANDISE

900 FRONT STREET, LAHAINA • 667-7400

Big Shows

ed. $25, $20. $15. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469.

FRIDAY, AUG 29

SATURDAY, AUG 30

Melveen Leed - Fri, Aug 29. Molokai born and raised Hawaiian country singer will perform for the third and final time at this summer concert series.

Special guests include slack key guitarist Kiks.

Free. 6-9 p.m. Ka`anapali Beach Hotel, Tiki Courtyard. 661-0011.

The Spirit of the Iao - Daily, Sep 19. The Iao Theater celebrates 80 years of existence.

Features production written by Joel William Agnew and performances by Rose Roselinski and Jerry Eiting as well as food by Hailiimaile General Store’s Bev Gannon and a silent auction. $40 advance/$50 door. 7:30 p.m.; Su Matinee, 5 p.m. Iao Theater, Wailuku. 2426969.

Meet John Ornellas - Lanai-based Maui Council candidate John Ornellas will address attendee questions and concerns. Free. 9-10 a.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center.

Swap Meet - I’ve always wanted to unearth some totally awesome treasure at a random flea market. This might be a good place to start.

Admission: 50 cents. 7 a.m.-12 p.m. Pu`unene Ave., Kahului. 877-3100.

Rudy Love - Vocalist Love has worked with the likes of Van Morrison and Sly & the Family Stone, among many other legendary acts. Tonight he shares the stage with his son, whose shares a name with his father. $5. 8-10 p.m. Paia Inn. 579-6000.

Cherry Blossom Cabaret - Sat, Aug 30. This mega-hot Honolulu-based cabaret act will make a rare Maui performance that is guaranteed to wow spectators on multiple levels. Maui-based Kit Kat Club also performs, and Kihei rock and rollers Seamonster will open the show. $10. 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

Casanova, Makawao. 572-0220.

Dry and Heavy - Sat. Aug. 30. This is the first Hawaii appearence for this Japanese dub reggae act as part of their Roots Candy World Tour. Also performing are ultra-talented, super-girly Japanese reggae singer Likkle Mai. W/ special guest Inna Vision. $20.

10 p.m. Charley’s, Paia. 579-9668.

Stage Free Comedy Night - Sat. Features standup from Michael Pullium, Monte Scott Perez, and David Gallagher. Free. 7 p.m. Iao Theater, Wailuku. 2448680 x23.

Calling All Readers - Mon-Fri. Want to read for Maui On Stageís Bare Essential Theater? Roles are announced at monthly readings and scripts are given out in advance. Call Kristi. 244-8680 x23.

Tickets on Sale Augie T - Sat, Sep 6. Wildly popular Hawaii-born comedian Augie Tulba will perform on Maui one night only. Proceeds benefit the Speak the Dream Foundation, a scholarship program that Tulba found-

Events THURSDAY, AUG 28 Long Term Care Partnership Meeting - Annual networking meeting features refreshments; registration begins at 9. 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Maui Tropical Plantation, Waikapu. 871-7749.

Meet John Ornellas - Lanai-based Maui Council candidate John Ornellas will address attendee questions and concerns. Free. 9-10 a.m. Cafe Marc Aurel, Wailuku.

Come Out and Play - Elizabeth Ann Brandon, MA wants to make friends with your inner child using cognitive therapy, hypnosis and transactional analysis.

Free. 12-3 p.m. Dragon’s Den, Makawao. 573-2424.

Meet John Ornellas - Lanai-based Maui Council candidate John Ornellas will address attendee questions and concerns. Free. 3-4 p.m. Borders Books & Music, Kahului.

Kahului Lions Club - Anyone interested in being involved is encouraged to attend this dinner meeting.

6 p.m. Maui Beach Hotel. 243-7402.

Cinema Night - Cafe Mambo will be hosting an evening of classic and cult classic films for the 21 and older crowd. This week’s flick is Blow. 9:30 p.m. Cafe Mambo, Paia. 579-8021.

Free Beading Classes - Have fun and make something beautiful. Sugar cube, 11 a.m.; Dazzling daisies, 3 p.m.; Hawaiian quilt, 6 p.m. Maui Bead Shack, Queen Ka`ahumanu Center. 873-8080.

Meet John Ornellas - Lanai-based Maui Council candidate John Ornellas will address attendee questions and concerns. Free. 1-2 p.m. Anthony’s Coffee, Maui.

Biofeedback - Mary Higgins, QXC/SCIO practitioner, helps you energetically rebalance after living yet another day in a toxin-filled world. Walk-ins only. Sliding scale pricing. 2-5 p.m. Dragon’s Den. 573-2424.

Job Club - Get help preparing resumes, contacting prospective employers and interviewing. Free. 3-5 p.m. Job Connections of Maui. 871-4143.

Shakin’ Keiki - Come see little hula dancers in adorable outfits doing the cultural dance of their ancestors. Free. 3:30 p.m. Lahaina Center, 900 Front St. 667-9216.

Meet John Ornellas - Lanai-based Maui Council candidate John Ornellas will address attendee questions and concerns. Free. 4-5 p.m. Starbucks at Pukalani Terrace Center.

Free Beading Classes - Have fun and make something beautiful. Charm bracelet, 11 a.m.; Bouquet ring, 3 p.m.; Wire wrapping, 6 p.m.

Maui Bead Shack, Queen Ka`ahumanu Center.

873-8080.

Habitat for Humanity - Spend a few hours helping a family in need get secure shelter. 9 a.m. Call for details. 893-0334.

Hula Classes - Hula Classes - Every Sat. Halau Kawaianuhealehua holds open hula classes for children, teen and adult wahines and kanes. 9 a.m. Maui Waena School.

Hula Show - Get a taste of Hawaiian history and culture. Free. 1 p.m. Maui Mall, Kahului. 877-8952.

Azeka Shopping Center Obon Festival Buddhist celebration to commemorate deceased ancestors. Food concessions open at 5:30 p.m., Maui Taiko Drummers start at 6:45 p.m., and Bon dancing begins at 7 p.m. Free. . 5:30-9:30 p.m. Azeka Shopping Center, Kihei. 879-5000.

Free Beading Classes - Have fun and make something beautiful. Basic earring, 11 a.m.; Quick cluster, 3 p.m.; Silk knotting, 6 p.m. Maui Bead Shack, Queen Ka`ahumanu Center. 873-8080.

Free surf documentary - Screening of the film Clay Marzo: Just Add Water, which documents the everyday life of a 19-year-old surf prodigy who has been diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome. Free. 8 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC. 242-7469.

Tantra Temple Services - Embrace the spiritual essence of all faiths with tantra, an ancient high-spiritual practice. Free. 10 a.m. 2138 Vineyard St., Wailuku. 244-4103.

Kalua Pig, Chicken, Mahi Mahi Lahaina Prime Rib Special $13.95 • Kihei Tacolicious Tuesdays $2.95 $3.95 Top Sirloin Steak 2 BURGERS NITE (excludes the Fantasy Burger) - $10.95 SHRIMP NITE! - Add 4 Deep Fried Shrimp to any meal - $3.00 Fish n’ Chips Friday - All You Can Eat! $11.95 Juicy 8oz. Flat Iron Steak prepared YOU CAN’T BEAT served with Fries & Asian slaw Date Night Steak Night $12.95 Ourto order, OUR MEAT! Fajita Fiesta Amore! Dinner for Two $19.95 (steak or chicken)

844 FRONT ST., LAHAINA • 667-7758

Meet John Ornellas - Lanai-based Maui Council candidate John Ornellas will address attendee questions and concerns. Free. 8-11 a.m. War Memorial Auditorium.

Summer Fashion Show - As part of Paia’s “Final Friday” celebration, this show will feature clothing and swimwear from Volcom and other brands as well as local shops, including Hana Hwy Surf and Indigo. Karen B. will perform. . 7:30 p.m. 149 Hana Hwy, Paia. 579-8999.

Maui’s Best Value with our Daily Specials (but the Fantasy Burger) Monday: Burgers & Brews Any&burger $9.95 any 14oz. Domestic Draft Tuesday: Wednesday: Thursday: Friday: Saturday: Sunday:

Lahaina Gateway Grand Opening - Celebration of the opening of a new west side shopping center will feature hula performances, blessing, free food and more. Free. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Honoapiilani Hwy and Keawe St, Lahaina.

2511 S. KIHEI RD., KIHEI • 891-8600

SUNDAY, AUG 31

Labor Day Celebration - U.S. Representatives Mazie Hirono and Niel Abercrombie will speak at an

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AUGUST 28, 2008

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DA KINE CALENDAR

THIS WEEK’S

ILWU/AFL-CIO-sponsored event that aims to celebrate the true meaning of Labor Day. There will be musical performances by Napua Grieg, Unified Soul, and Mondo Kane. Free for union members, families, and retirees. 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Wailuku Community Center. 244-9191.

ancestors. Free. 2:30 p.m. Lahaina Center, 900 Front St. 667-9216.

Free Beading Classes - Have fun and make something beautiful. Learn basic crimping methods, 11 a.m.; Wire wrapping: 2 p.m. Maui Bead Shack, Queen Ka`ahumanu Center. 873-8080.

WOW! - Every Wed. Wailea on Wednesdays presents live island music, gallery receptions, artist appearances and more. . 6:30-8 p.m. 897-6770 x2.

Hula Show - Get a taste of Hawaiian history and culture. Free. 1 p.m. Maui Mall, Kahului. 877-8952.

Keiki

Free Concert - Performance by the Maui Community Band. 4 p.m. War Memorial Gym. 5726247.

A Morning of Mo’ Music - Tue. Musician and former Music Together Maui teacher Dylan Donkin invites babies, toddlers, preschoolers, and their parents to move to the music, sing songs, chant rhythms, and ìjamî with instruments. 11 a.m. Hana Public School and Library. 248-4848.

Israeli Dance - Learn traditional and modern International and Israeli dances. Free. 4:30-6 p.m.

Grace Church, Kulu. 264-5214.

Free Beading Classes - Have fun and make something beautiful. Quick cluster, 11 a.m.; Silk knotting, 3 p.m.; Basic earring, 6 p.m. Maui Bead Shack, Queen Ka`ahumanu Center. 873-8080.

Luau Fundraiser - Hale Makua’s 20th Annual Ohana Luau Fundraiser will include entertainment from Da Braddahs and food from Dani’s Catering. $50/$15 keiki. . 4:30-7:30 p.m. Kihei Community Center. 871-9283.

A Morning of Mo’ Music - Wed. Musician and former Music Together Maui teacher at Music Together Maui Dylan invites babies, toddlers, preschoolers, and their parents to move to the music, sing songs, chant rhythms, and ìjamî with instruments. 10:30 a.m. Lahaina Public Library. 662-3950.

Line Dancing - Practice your tush push ya’ll and come on down for some line dancing by the Maui Paniolo Posse. Lessons: 6:30 p.m.; Dancing: 7 p.m.

Lahaina Cannery Mall.

After-School Help - Mon-Fri. Hui Malama Learning Center offers after-school homework help and classes. Call for directions and hours. 244-5911.

MONDAY, SEP 01 Senior Line Dancing - Line dance lessons for people 55 or better. 8:30-10 a.m. Kaunoa Senior Center, Sprecklesville. 270-7313.

Candidate Cookout - Labor Day cookout features an opportunity to meet South Maui County Council Candidate Don Couch. $10 donation. 11 a.m.-2 p.m.

Kamaole Beach III, Kihei.

Pipe Up - No experience is needed for drummers and bagpipers at these open, free lesson and practices for the Isle of Maui Pipe Band. 6 p.m. Call for Direction. 876-0154.

High Hopes Square Dance Club - A place for beginners to pick up some steps and seasoned square dancers to show off their moves. Free. 7 p.m.

Hannibal Tavares Community Center, Pukalani. 5720671.

Athletic Club Outreach - Every Tue & Thu. Got tough kids? Get them instruction on Olympic weightlifting, power lifting, body building and sportsspecific weight training by an experienced team of coaches. Ages 11-19. Free. 4:45-6 p.m. St. Mark Weightlifting Hall, Good Shepherd Episcopal Church, Wailuku. 244-4656.

Free Keiki Art Classes - Every Mon, Tue, Wed & Fri. Lahaina Arts Society offers free children’s art classes island wide. MON - Lahaina Surf Hawaiian Housing, 3-5 p.m. & Baha’i Faith Maui Center, Makawao, 9 a.m.-12. TUE - Kehekili Park Terrace, Wailuku, 3-5 p.m. WED - Baha’i Faith Maui Center, 9 a.m.-12 p.m.; Honokowai Kau Hale, 2:30-4:30 p.m.; Ka Hale A Ke Ola, Wailuku, 4-6 p.m. FRI - Haiku Boy’s and Girl’s Club, 3-5 p.m. For more info call 661-0111.

Kids Love Stories - Tue. So bring them down to listen at Lahaina’s biggest bookstore. Free. 10-10:30 a.m. Barnes and Noble, Lahaina. 662-1300.

Free Beading Classes - Learn new skills and be creative. Hawaiian quilt, 11 a.m.; Charm bracelet; 3 p.m.; Basic earrings, 6 p.m. Maui Bead Shack, Queen Ka`ahumanu Center. 873-8080.

Summer Youth Center - Mon-Fri. A place where the kids (ages 9-18) can stay busy learning, playing and socializing while you’re at work. Free. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Hui Malama Youth Center, Wailuku. 242-9730.

TUESDAY, SEP 02

West Side Storytime - Every Tue & Sat. Lahaina’s newest bookseller is hosting keiki story time, so get them hooked on reading early. Tue., 10 a.m.; Sat., 11 a.m. Barnes and Noble, Lahaina.

Non-Profit Polynesian Dance - Support the kids of the Napili Kai Foundation by watching their Polynesian dance show. $10 adults, $5 kids. 5:30 p.m. 669-6271.

Maui Singles Investment Club - This event gives Maui singles a chance to mingle while learning about investments. 5:30-7 p.m. Cary & Eddie’s Hideaway, Kahului. 579-9249.

Ukulele Lessons - Learn some strumming techniques to impress you friends with. Free. 5:45 p.m.

Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-5304.

Folk Dancing - Shake it folk style with the Maui Israeli Fold Dancing group. Free. . 8 p.m. Jewish Congregation of Maui, Kihei. 280-1051.

Free Beading Classes - Have fun and make something beautiful. Bouquet ring, 11 a.m.; Sugar cube, 3 p.m.; Basic crimping, 6 p.m. Maui Bead Shack, Queen Ka`ahumanu Center. 873-8080.

Toastmasters - Perfect your public speaking skills in this community club. 9 a.m., Kapalua Land Co. training center, 665-5485; 6 p.m., St. Theresa Church, Kihei, 298-3966.

Speed Dating - Sit down for a round of threeminute dates. Who knows, you could find true love... or at least someone you might want to spend a whole second date with. Registration: $5. Ages 30+.

8 p.m.; ages 21-35, 10 p.m.. Wow-Wee Maui Kava Bar & Grill, Kahului. 871-1414.

WEDNESDAY, SEP 03 Ayurvedic Consultations - Margo P. Uma Gal, CAP., offers up wisdom on diet and lifestyle from over 20 years of experience as an Ayurvedic Practitioner.

Walk-ins only. Free. 10:30 a.m.-1 p.m. Makawao. 5722424.

Soroptomist International of Maui - Meeting of a voluntary service group that aims to improve the lives of women and girls worldwide. 12-1 p.m. Cary & Eddie’s Hideaway, Kahului. 281-4010.

Shakin’ Keiki - Come see little hula dancers in adorable outfits doing the cultural dance of their

22

AUGUST 28, 2008

Keiki Issues? - Thu. The Parent Project, a program for parents of strong willed children. Wrestle the phone away from the child and make that call. Free.

6:30-8:30 p.m. Hui Malama Learning Center. 2895050.

Story Time - Thu. Keiki story time and crafts. Free.

10 a.m. Hawaiian Village Coffee, Kahana. 665-1114.

Toddler Story Time - Thu. Brush up on the latest in children’s books with your little one. Free. 10 a.m.

Makawao Public Library. 573-8785.

Saturday Stories - Sat. Bring the kids down to Lahaina’s biggest bookstore for stories and special events. Free. 11 a.m. Barnes and Noble, Lahaina. 6621307.

Yu-Gi-Oh - Sat. Little gamester get out your cards and get ready for a Yu-Gi-Oh tournament! Free. 3 p.m.

Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-4766.

Yo Yo Workshop & Demo - Sun. Yo Yo’s are silent, so encourage your kids to learn how to use them and finally get some peace and quiet! Free. 4-5 p.m. Maui Toy Works. 661-5304.

Keiki Chess Club - Mon. For little masterminds age 7-12. Free. 2:30-4 p.m. Makawao Public Library.

573-5313.

Keiki Shots - Wed. (West Maui) Bring children up to the age of 18 without medical insurance in for vaccinations. Bring all immunization records. Walk-in basis.

Free. 9-11 a.m. Lahaina Comprehensive Health Center. 984-8260.

Lecture Introduction to Core Four - Tue. Maui Economic Opportunity will host a free class that will serve as in introduction to the Core Four business planning program. Free. 6-7 p.m. Maui Economic Opportunity Family Center, Kahului. 249-2990 x241.

The ABCs of a Business Plan - Wed. Participants will discuss the advantages of having a business plan

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

PICKS THE ART OF TEASE Saturday (Aug 30) 9pm, Casanova, Makawao [MUSIC/CABARET] Honolulu’s Cherry Blossom Cabaret has a multi-faceted appeal.

The hotness aspect is perhaps most eye-catching, but their upcoming Maui performance will certainly draw more than oglers. In fact, the girls called themselves Cherry Blossom Burlesque, but ditched the moniker to avoid being branded as pure striptease. The 10-member troupe infuses their act with political satire, film noir, vaudeville, and, of course kitsch. Their aesthetic is decidedly retro with an element of surrealism. No matter what the draw is for you, be prepared for astonishment. Also performing is the Kit Kat Club, Maui’s own fabulously talented troupe of jazz dancers. Kit Kat Club draws its influences from a variety of places, including the roaring ‘20s and the swinging ‘40s, and is able to pull off humor and sensuality at once. Opening up the show is Kihei-based garage rock band Sea Monster. These guys are a must-see, given how rare it is to catch a sound like theirs live on Maui. All in all, this is one of those can’t miss shows that has it all.

Plus you’ll have that extra day this weekend to recover. $10. [Kate Bradshaw]

JUST ADD WATER Friday (Aug 29) 8pm, Castle Theatre, MACC [FILM] Nineteen-year-old surfer Clay Marzo has been featured in numerous surf documentaries. In spite of his age, he has already been recognized as having a unique, creative style. That style has already earned him three National Scholastic Surfing Association titles, a spot in Quicksilver’s Young Guns crew and all of the attention that comes with such achievements. Yet Marzo was recently diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome, a condition that limits an individual’s ability to socially interact. Clay Marzo: Just Add Water chronicles Marzo’s experiences and interactions throughout his early career as a pro surfer. The film should serve as an inspiration, but not without a lion’s share of killer surf clips. Free. [KB]

OBON FESTIVAL Saturday (Aug 30) 5:30pm, Azeka Shopping Center, Kihei [CULTURE] If you have not checked out any of the Obon celebrations, now may be the time to do so, as this year’s Obon season is winding down. Each week a different Buddhist mission has had an Obon celebration, and this one should serve as a culmination of sorts.

Not familiar with the Obon tradition? It originates in Japan, and serves as a means of honoring the spirits of deceased ancestors. The celebrations include Bon Odori, or Obon Dancing, among other things. The dancing will begin at 7pm, drumming at 6:45pm, and food concessions at 5:30pm. Free. [KB]

HAWAIIAN COUNTRY GIRL Saturday (Aug 30), 6pm, Kaanapali Beach Hotel, Lahaina [MUSIC] My first four months in the Hawaiian Isles were spent on Molokai, where I served as an intern with The Molokai Times . The island seemed suspended in time and steeped in resistance to anything that threatened its culture. Now, as you might imagine, I have a soft spot for anyone or anything that comes from Molokai. For decades, Molokai-born and raised singer Melveen Leed has spread the Friendly Isle’s laid-back Hawaiian country vibe to a broader audience. Tonight she closes out her summer concert series with a sunset performance in the very un-Molokai Kaanapali resort complex. Her performance, which will take place in the Tiki Courtyard will feature guest appearances from the likes of slack-key guitarist Kik, among others. Free. [KB]

The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

AMBROSIA 1913 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 891-1011

CAFE MARC AUREL 28 N. Market St. Wailuku - 244-0852

Thursday 08/28

Friday 08/29

Saturday 08/30

Sunday 08/31

Monday 09/01– Wednesday 09/03

Jeff New No cover, 10pm

Estee Graham No cover, 10pm

Erin Smith Band No cover, 10pm

Ahuhea No cover, 9:30pm

MON - DJ Blu Sol, 9:30pm; TUE - Kahala & Indo of LAWA, 9pm ; WED - Bamboo Blues 9pm

Tom Cherry Band No Cover

CASANOVA 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

CHARLEY’S 142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-9668

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

Speakeasy Cabaret $10, 9:45pm

Coyote Ugly $10, 10pm

Vince Esquire $5, 10 pm

Dry & Heavy/Likkle Mai $20, 10pm

Dave Carroll No cover

Orin & Junior No cover

GIOVANI’S 2291 Honoapiilani Hwy., 661-3160

HENRY’S BAR & GRILL 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849

Inna Vision 9pm

Ultra Fabulous

Fish out of Water 10pm

Silky Ringo 10pm

Peter from TBA No cover

MON - Erin Smith; TUE -Jazz Night; WED -Howard Ahia, No cover

Erin Smith No cover, 10pm

MON - Silky Ringo, TUE - Scott Baird WED -Wii Wednesday/ Tee-shirt design contest

MON - Marty Dread, $10, $5 Kama aina

Live Music No cover, 9pm

Live Music No cover, 9pm

Gina Martinelli No cover

MON - Da Ha-y-ns, 9pm

Way Back Machine No cover

Kahala No cover

TUE - Da Ha-y-ns; No cover WED - Chico & Da Kine; No cover

Crunch Pups $5, 10pm

TUE - Kilohana, No cover; WED - Celtic Music, No cover

Sam Ahia

MON-WED - Sam Ahia

Live Music No cover, 9pm Karen B No cover, 9pm

505 Front St., Lahaina - 661-8422

JACQUES

DJ Del Sol 10pm

120 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8844

36 Keala Pl., Kihei - 875-7711

TUE - Kanoa of Gomega, $5; WED - The Flying Sheep Problem/Karen B., $5, 10pm TUE - Hwy 30

Silky Ringo 9pm

I’O

KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB

Dave Carroll No cover

Quiz Night No cover, 8pm

1445 S. Kihei Rd. - 874-4041

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

Hawaiian Nights No cover

Salsa w/ DJ Jose $7, 10pm

GIAN DON’S

HARD ROCK CAFÉ

WED - Wild Wahine Wednesday w/DJ Styles & DJ Jammin J; $10, 10pm

Off Tomorrow $7, 10pm

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-7189

Wharf Cinema, Lahaina - 667-0908

MON - Open Mic w/ Ryan Vice

Maui SLAM $5, 10pm

COMPADRES COOL CAT CAFE

Larry Goldings No Cover

Vince Esquire No cover

Kenny Roberts No cover Crunch Pups No cover, 10pm

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE 355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

Orrin & Junior No cover, 9-11pm

KIMOS 845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

Sam Ahia

In the heart of Olde Makawao Town

WILD WAHINE WEDNESDAY CASANOVA’S FAMOUS

LADIES NIGHT Q103 and the Big Hawaiian present ‘808 dopest djs’

Dj Styles, DJ Jammin J

THE EVENING THAT EARNED CASANOVA THE AWARDS

Thursday August 28th

MAUI SLAM

“BEST LATE NIGHT IN MAUI” and “BEST SINGLES SCENE IN MAUI” Music Starts at 10:00pm $10 cover

Poets, eMCees, ACTors compete for Glory & Cash

Friday August 29th

Music Starts at 10:00pm $10 cover

Dance with DJ BOOMSHOT Saturday August 30th

SPEAKEASY from Honolulu

Island Music - Island Beat Music Starts at 10:00pm $7 cover

Cabaret, Live Music and Games with

Cherry Blossom Burlesque Special Guests: SEAMONSTER

Music Starts at 9:45pm $10 cover

Make it a memorable evening. Dine and dance at Casanova.

For dinner reservations call 572-0220 www.casanovamaui.com

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

23

DA KINE CALENDAR and get a chance to view sample business plans.

Free. 12-1 p.m. Maui County Business Resource Center, Maui Mall. 873-8247.

Families With Mental Illness Course - Wed. Course aims to help families of individuals with serious mental illness. Free. 5-7:30 p.m. Cameron Center, Wailuku. 572-3757.

Workshops Mystery of Healing Revealed - Sat. Learn about chakras, auras, energy work, and more with facilitator and healer Scott Marmorstein. $36. 11 a.m.-1 p.m.

Studio Maui, Haiku. 575-9390.

Environment Honokawai Valley Restoration Project - Sat. Help remove non-native plants in this remote, archaeologically rich valley as part of this Pacific Whale Foundation-sponsored project. Participants meet in front of the North Sugar Cane Train Station, located in Kaanapali on the mountain side of Puukoli Road. . 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Honokawai Valley. 249-8811 ext 1.

Save Honolua - Tue. Meeting to inform, educate and involve the community on the proposed development of Honolua Bay. 6:45 p.m. Lahaina Civic Center.

870-0052.

Smarter than a Sand Crab? - Mon-Fri. Get free info about marine life and answers to all those pesky questions that keep you up all night. The Pacific Whale Foundation Marine Naturalists are definitely smarter than a fifth grader. The question is, are you?.

8 a.m.-1 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea. 249-8811.

Turtle Mania - Daily. Special presentations, trivia, children’s activities, a birthday bash, and a Sea Talk, all with a special focus on the honu (sea turtle), will take place. Complimentary with aquarium admission.

10:30 a.m.-5 p.m. Maui Ocean Center, Ma`alaea. 2707088.

Building supplies - Every Wed, Thu, Fri & Sat. Spring cleaning! Donate new and nearly new building materials or purchase them at reduced prices.

Volunteers needed to stock, display and price mer-

BY KATE BRADSHAW CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

chandise. Reduce the amount of usable building materials going into the landfill. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Habitat for Humanity, Market St., Wailuiku. 986-8050.

Weed and Pot Club - Wed. Did that get your attention? Push up your sleeves and rake, hoe and pull weeds in a beautiful garden setting. Tools, gloves and drinking water provided. Bring sunscreen and tennis shoes. 8:30 a.m. Maui Nui Botanical Gardens, Kahului. 249-2798.

Coastal Restoration - Fri. Habitat restoration at Waihe`e coastal dunes with Maui Coastal Land Trust.

8 a.m.-12 p.m. Waihe`e. 244-5263.

Save the Forest - Sun. The Pacific Whale Foundation is hosting a group of ten volunteers to pull invasive pine trees near Hosmers Grove.

Transportation is provided. Bring warm clothes, long pants and closed boots. Pick ups: 7:30 a.m., Harbor Shop, 300 Ma`alaea Rd; 8:15 a.m., Upcountry Tavares Community Center. RSVP 856-8341.

Walk Waihee - Tue. Take an educational guided tour of the Waihee Coastal Dunes. Free. 9 a.m. Call to register. 244-5263.

Pool Hours - Daily. Pool Hours - Besides the fear of contracting super-strain ukuís, I really enjoy a good swim in a public pool. Sometimes the thought of dealing with sand is just too much to bear. Kahului, Kihei, Lahaina, War Memorial, Pukalani, anthe Old and New Wailuku Pools: M-W, F, S 9 a.m-4 p.m.; Th 10 a.m.-4:30 p.m.; Sun 12-4:30 p.m. These hours can change due to events. To double check you can call, 270-6135.

Paddling for Breast Cancer Survivors - Every Mon & Wed. Get together with other survivors for canoe paddling. Free. 6:45 a.m. Kihei Canoe Club.

243-2999.

Tai Chi - Every Mon & Fri. Get your Tai Chi in during your lunchbreak with Dr. Lorrin Pang. Free. noon12:45 p.m. State Building Plaza, Wailuku. 984-8200.

Tennis Championship - Daily. Annual Labor Day tennis championship for men’s and women’s singles and doubles. 12-4 p.m. Kapalua Tennis Gardens. 665-9112.

Mahu

Sports

Volleyball Day - Sat. Bump, set, spike! Free. 1 p.m.

Kamaole III Beach Park, Kihei.

Golf Tournament - Fri. Sponsored by Maui Land and Pineapple, proceeds from this event will benefit Maui Community College students as well as scholarships for Maui’s Academy of Hospitality and Tourism. Call to register. 7 a.m. Dunes at Maui Lani.

244-8625.

Speed Dating - Mon. Lesbian women, 9 p.m.; gay men, 10 p.m. Dance party to follow. 8 p.m. Wow-wee Maui’s Kava Bar, Kahului. 871-1414.

Maui Channel Swim - Sat. Watch world class swimmers come ashore after a 9-mile swim from Lanai to Kaanapali. Awards banquet will take place at 2 p.m. 6 a.m.-2 p.m. Ka`anapali Beach Hotel.

Live Painting - Fri. Kihei-based painter Rik Fitch will spend the afternoon creating works inspired by the South Maui shoreline and infused with impressionism. Free. 3:30-7 p.m. Maui Hands Gallery, Lahaina.

667-9898.

Na ‘Opio Hana Pa’a & the Molokai Challenge - Sat. Paddlers, kiters, sailors, and other non-motorized watercraft operators race from Kaanapali coast to Molokai. Event will raise money for various Molokai youth groups. 6 a.m.- 12 p.m. TBD. 553-4227.

Punt, Pass & Kick Competition - Wed. Open to girls and boys age 8-15. No cleats allowed. 2 p.m.

Lahaina Recreation Center. 667-9314.

Art

Ceramics Show - Daily. Ceramics by Albert Molina on display. The gallery is open daily. 9 a.m.-5 p.m.

Banyan Tree Gallery, Lahaina. 661-0111.

Photography Competition - Daily. Hi Art Magazine is seeking entries featuring portraits of the faces of Hawai`i. Competition open to all Hawai`i residents.

Entries due by Sept 1. www.hiartmagazine.com for more info. .

EVERY TUESDAY STARTS @ 8PM

Love finds the person who is easy to find PREREGISTER to guarantee your space! Call for a reservation.$5 Application fee includes a gift bag.

HAPPY HOUR REN’S SUSHI BAR SPECIALS! 333 DAIRY ROAD

871-1414 24

AUGUST 28, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

DRINK SPECIAL

8-Midnight

Art Night - Fri. Stroll through dozens of art galleries in Lahaina Town. Special gallery shows, featured artists-in-action and refreshments. Free. 6:30 p.m.

Lahaina. 661-6284.

Art Bistro - Mon. Local artists display their wares, from photography and painting to jewelry and sculptures. Live music, too. 5-10pm. Jacques Northshore Bistro, 120 Hana Hwy. Paia. 808-269-0961.

Farmers market, Art/Craft Fairs Heui Arts and Crafts Fair - Sat. Features local arts and crafts including ceramics, piano key art, jewelry, scrimshaw, and ornaments. Live music. Benefits Na Kupuna O Maui. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Banyan Tree Park, Lahaina.

Rummage Sale - Sat. Friends of Glenn Goto will be holding a rummage sale. Proceeds will go help cover cancer treatment costs for Officer Glenn Goto. Items for sale include clothing, household goods, fresh flowers, and plate lunches. 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Lihikai Elementary School, Kahului.

Ho`olokahi Arts & Crafts Fair - Every Tue & Fri. Fresh flower lei-making classes from 9-11 a.m. on Fridays. 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Wailea Beach Marriott Resort south lobby. 879-1922.

Ohana Farmers & Crafters Market - Every Tue, Wed & Fri. 8 a.m.-4 p.m. Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 877-3369.

Rummage Sale - Daily. The Cameron Center’s 10thannual bazaar features entertainment, food, and a silent auction. . 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Cameron Center, Wailuku. 244-5546.

Scholastic Book Fair - Daily. King Kamehameha III School will be holding its book fair to benefit the school’s library fund. 7:15 a.m.-2:45 p.m. King Kamehaeha III School, Lahaina. 662-3955 ext. 229.

Farmers Market of Maui - Every Mon, Wed & Fri. Sample the goods at this local market for fresh produce. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. 61 S. Kihei Rd.

The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

Thursday 08/28 LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010

Friday 08/29

Rampage $5, 10pm

LONGHI’S

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

Neto Latin Salsa No cover, 9pm

MAI TAI LOUNGE 839 Front St., Lahaina - 661-5288

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S 844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

MULLIGAN’S AT THE WHARF Cinema Center, Lahaina - 661-8881

OCEANS BAR & GRILL 1819 S. Kihei Rd. - 891-2414

OYSTER BAR 744 Front St., Lahaina - 661-9090

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

ADD Twins No cover, 9pm

UNISAN 2102 Vineyard St., Wailuku - 244-4500

WOW-WEE MAUI’S 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului - 871-1414

MON - Kanoa of Gomega, 10pm; TUE - DJ Razor, 10pm; WED - Crunch Pups, 10pm

MON - Na Hoku, Crazy Fingers; WED - Way Back Wednesdays, 10pm

DJ Mike 9pm

ADD Twins No cover, 9pm

ADD Twins No cover, 9pm

DJ Music No cover, 9pm

MON - Hazmatt; WED - Pole Dancing/DJ Music, No cover, 9pm

Byron Brown and the Derelicts; No cover, 10pm

Off Tomorrow No cover, 10pm

MON - John Feary; TUE - Randall Rospond; WED Willie K, $25

Silky Ringo No cover, 10pm

MON - Junior Guys; TUE - I-Chalice; WED - Open Mic; No cover, 10pm

Wee D’ono No cover, 10pm

Silky Ringo No cover, 10pm

Hazmatt No cover, 10pm

Trike Races 10pm

DJ JammingJ/DJ Styles $5, 10pm

Flavazone $8, 10pm

DJ Bud $5, 10pm

DJ Blast $10, 10pm

DJ N8 Castro $10, 10pm

WED - Industry Night w/DJ Skinny Guy, No cover, 10pm Live Music No cover

MON-WED - Live Music

Kanoa of Gomega No cover, 10pm

MON - DJ Blast; TUE - Guest DJ; WED - ADD Twins; All no cover, 10pm

DJ Shark in da Water No cover, 10pm

MON - Karaoke, 9:30pm; TUE - The New Project, No cover, 10pm; WED - TBA, No cover, 10pm

Orin & Junior No cover, 9pm DJ Slackin No cover, 10pm

Gomega No cover, 10pm

Crunch Pups No cover, 10pm

DJ Nexus No cover, 10pm Vince Esquire No cover, 10pm

Haiku Hillbillies $3, 9pm

1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

1279 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 874-9299

Industry Night 9:30pm

DJ Mike 9pm

Thursday Night Live $10

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR TIP-UPS TAVERN

Yo Momma 10pm

Shaka Saturdays $10, 10pm

505 Front St., Lahaina - 667-4341

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

Monday 09/01– Wednesday 09/03

The Willy’s & DJ Malik No cover, 9pm

PACIFIC’O SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE

Sunday 08/31

DJ Iz & Davey Lee 9pm

888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

LULU’S

Saturday 08/30

Soul Concepts No cover, 10pm

Tom Cherry No cover, 10pm

Ohana Groove No cover, 10pm

Club Night Disco $5, 10pm

R-U-Gay & Happy Club Night; $10, 10pm

Hawaiian Reggae No cover, 9-10pm

Rock Band No Cover, 9-10pm

Rock Band No Cover, 9-10pm

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

25

DA KINE CALENDAR

BY KATE BRADSHAW CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

Honokowai Farmers Market - Every Mon, Wed & Fri. Lots of fresh local produce plus baked and canned goods. 7-11 a.m. Lower Honopiilani Hwy.

Kobe Japanese Steakhouse - Fri-Sat, 9:30 p.m., 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 667-5555.

Lulu’s - Wed, 7 p.m., 1941 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9944.

Kimo’s - Mon- Wed, Sat, Sun, Sam Ahia. Fri, deAquino Bradaz. All sets 6:30-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811.

Patrick Major; Sun, Wayne and Friends; Mon, Tue, Ernest Pua`a. All sets 5:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly.

Resort Craft Fair - Every Wed & Fri. Hawaiian arts and crafts. 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Renaissance Wailea Beach Resort.

Sansei - Thu-Fri, 10 p.m., 600 Office Road, Kapalua, 669-6286; Thu-Sat, 10 p.m. Kihei Town Center, 8790004.

Leilani’s On The Beach - Fri, Scott Baird;. Sat, JD and Harry; Sun, Kilohana. All sets 2:30-5 p.m. 2435 Ka`anapali Pkwy, Building J, 661-4495.

■ KA`ANAPALI BEACH HOTEL 2525 Ka`anapali Pkwy, 661-0011

Aloha Craft Fair - Fri. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Maui Mall.

872-4320.

Tiffany’s - Daily, 9:30 p.m., 1424 L. Main St., Wailuku, 249-0052.

Tiki Courtyard - Nightly, Alanui with Uncle Rudi; Sun, Hula show. All sets 6:30 p.m.

KBH Craft Fair - Fri. Cultural crafts and live demos.

9 a.m.-1 p.m. Ka`anapali Beach Hotel lobby. 667-5978.

Tip Up’sTavern - Mon, 9:30 p.m., 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 874-9299.

Moose McGillycuddy’s, Lahaina - Fri, Llayne & Pro Ed; Sat, Mark & Mike. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., 667-7758.

Organic Farmers Market - Sat. Fresh produce that’s cheaper than the grocery store. 6:30 a.m.-noon.

Eddie Tam Memorial Center.

Unisan - Thu-Sat, 9:30 p.m., 2102 Vineyard St., Wailuku, 244-4500.

DINNER MUSIC

POETRY Open Mic - Every night is open mic night at Hawaiian Village Coffee. Kahana Gateway location, call 665-1114.

Express Yourself - Every Mon. Open Mic Night with music, song, poetry! Free. 7 p.m., Cafe Marc Aurel, Wailuku, 244-0852.

Poetry Reading - Every second Tue, read your original work, your favorite poem, or just come to be inspired. Free. 6:30 p.m., Lahaina Public Library, 6623950.

Open Mind Open Mic - Every Mon. Open Mind Open Mic with spoken word, poetry, comedy— whatever you have to say here’s your chance. Free. 6 p.m., Moana Bakery, Paia, 244-9091.

Open Mic - Every Saturday the Maui Media Lab hosts an open mic night for poets, muscicians and others who want to be heard. Sessions are recorded and fed to the internet. All ages are welcome. Free.

6-9 p.m., Maui Media Lab, Baldwin Ave, zumatribe@yahoo.com.

Poetry Reading - Every second Thu Maui Live Poets Society hosts an open poetry reading on the West side. Free. 6:30- 9 p.m. Lahaina, 661-0517

KARAOKE Isana Restaurant - Daily, 9 p.m. 515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 874-1811.

WEST MAUI BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Wed-Fri, John Kane; Sat, Harry Troupe; Sun, Greg DiPiazza; Mon, Tue, Marvin Tevaga. All sets 7:30-9:30 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700.

Cheeseburger In Paradise - Mon, Tue, Scotty Rotten; Wed, Fri, Harry Troupe; Thu, Sat, Sun, Brooks McGuire. All sets 4:30-10:30 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855.

Compadres - Tue, 4 p.m., Live music. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-7189.

Cool Cat Cafe - Thu, Erin Smith; Fri, Sat, Dave Carroll; Sun, Wed, Whale Sharks; Mon, Mickie Moore; Tue, Jazz; . all sets 7:30-10 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 667-0908.

Hula Grill - (Early sets) Wed, Thu, Fri, Sat Ernest Pua’a; Sun,Mon, Kawika Lum Ho; Tue, Jarret Roback. Early sets 3-5 p.m.

(Followed by) Thu, Braddah Brian & Roy; Fri, Brian, Roy & Kawika;. Sat, “TBA”; Sun, Ryan Tanaka & Friends; Mon,Damon; Tue, Roy & Friends; Wed, An Den. Late sets 7-9:30 p.m.

2435 Ka`anapali Parkway, Building P, 6676636.

Java Jazz/Soup Nutz - Mon-Sat, Acoustic music.

All sets 7 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapi`ilani Rd., Honokowai, 667-0787.

Mulligan’s on the Wharf - Fri, AnRil. All sets 7 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 661-8881.

Pioneer Inn - Thu, Ah-Tim Eleniki; Tue, Captain Billy Bones; Wed, Greg Di Piazza. All sets 6-8 p.m. 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636.

Sea House Restaurant - Early sets in the Sea Breeze Terrace: Thu & Fri, Brian Haia; Sa-Su, Lui Williams; Mon-Wen, Coelho Morrison. All sets 3:305 p.m. Thu, Albert Kaina and Kincade Basques; Fri, Kincade Basques; Sat, Coelho Morrison; Sun, Andrew Jauba; Mon & Tue Kincade Basques; Wed, Albert Kaina. All sets 7-9 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapi`ilani Rd., Napili, 669-1500.

SOUTH MAUI Backstreet Cafe - Fri, Liz & Joanie; Sat, Steve Monroe, all sets 5:30-8:30 p.m. Sun, Nicky Campos, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. 1280 S. Kihei Rd, 891-2595.

Longhi’s - Sat, acoustic music. 10:30-11 p.m. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., 891-8883 Ma`alaea Grill - Thu, Fri, Sat, Benoit Jazz Works. All sets 6:30-9 p.m. Maalaea Harbor, 243-2206.

Moose McGillycuddy’s, Kihei - Fri, Erin Smith; Sat, Anuhea; All sets 5:30-7:30 p.m. 2511 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8600.

Mulligan’s on the Blue - Fri, Gail Swanson; 6-8 p.m.; Sat, Sun, Celtic Tigers; Mon, Gypsy Pacific; 7 p.m. Tue, Randall Rospond; 6:30-8:30 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131.

South ShoreTiki Lounge - Thu, Sun, Tue, Tony; Fri, Eclipse; Sat, Erin Smith; Mon, Kanoa; Wed, Kenny Roberts. All sets 4-6 p.m. 1913 Kihei Rd., Kihei Kalama Village, 874-6444.

Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café - Sun, Mon, Brittany; Wed, Sat, Merv Oana Thu; Fri Margie; Tue Jamie Lawrence. All sets 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983.

Tradewinds Poolside Cafe - Thu, Kawika Lum Ho; Fri, Kaleo Cullen; Sat, Louise Lambert; Sun, Mon, Kenny Roberts; Tue, Ramen & Cora; Wed, Keoki Ruiz.

All sets 6-9 p.m. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd., 874-6284.

CENTRAL MAUI Café Marc Aurel - Tue, Live Music; Mon, Open Mic Night. 7:30 p.m. 28 N. Market St., Wailuku, 244-0852.

Main Street Bistro - Th-Fri, Rhythm & Blues with Freedom. 5-7:30 p.m.. 2051 Main St., Wailuku, 2446816.

Sushi Go - Wed, Live music. 4-8 p.m. Queen Ka`ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744.

Wowee-Maui’s Kava Bar & Grill- Th, Hawaiian Jazz & Fusion w/ Robbie Ray. 6-9 p.m. Fri, Hawaiian Raggae, 6-9 p.m. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1414.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI Hana Hou Cafe - Wed, Dorothy Betz and Les Adam with Vince Esquire. Thu, Haiku Hillbillys. Sat, Live music. All sets 6:30-9:30 p.m. 810 Haiku Rd, Haiku Cannery, 575-2661.

Jacque’s - Mon, Live Jazz. 5 p.m. 120 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-8844.

Morning Glories Organic Internet Cafe - Fri, Elaine Ryan, 3-4 p.m.; Mon, Karen B, 1-2 p.m.137 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-6009.

Moana Cafe & Bakery - Wed, Benoit Jazzworks; Thu Mark Johnstone, Fri, Classic Hawaiian with Jocelyn, all sets 6:30-8:30. Sat, Live jazz music with Mark Johnstone & Friends, 12:30 -2:30 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI ■ HYATT REGENCY MAUI RESORT & SPA 200 Nohea Kai Dr, Lahaina, 661-1234 Weeping Banyan Lounge - Nightly, Live music. All sets 6:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly.

■ KAANAPALI BEACH CLUB 104 Ka`anapali Shores, Lahaina, 661-2000 Ohana Bar & Grill - Wed, Thu, Live music; Fri,

26

AUGUST 28, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

Kupanaha - Nightly, Hula show, 6:30-7:30 p.m.

■ NAPILI KAI BEACH RESORT 5900 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Napili, 669-1500 Thu, Kincaid and Albert; Fri, Sat, Mon, Tue, Kincaid Basques; Sun, Kapule Paoa; Wed, Albert Kaina. All sets 7-9 p.m.

■ RITZ CARLTON 1 Ritz Carlton Drive, Kapalua, 669-6200 Banyan Tree Restaraunt - Wed & Thu, Ranga Pae 6:15-9:45 p.m.

■ ROYAL LAHAINA RESORT 2780 Keka`a Dr., Ka`anapali, 661-3611 Royal Ocean Terrace - Thu, Fri, Sat, Live Hawaiian.

6-8 p.m.

■ SHERATON MAUI HOTEL 2605 Ka`anapali Pkwy, 661-0031 Lagoon Bar - Nightly, Hula dancing during sets. Thu, Kulewa; Fri, Ralph and Allan; Sat, Fausto and Kawaika; Sun; Kulewa; Wed, Nathan and Ralph. All sets 6-8 p.m. Torchlighting and cliff diving ceremony at sunset nightly.

■ THE WESTIN MAUI HOTEL 2365 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-2525 Ono Bar & Grille - Thu, Sat, Steve Sargenti; Fri, Larry Golis; Sun, Margie Heart; Mon, Ernest Puaa; Tue, Brian Haia; Wed, Pam Peterson. Tue-Sun shows, 6-9 p.m. Mon, 5:30-9 p.m.

Tropica - (Early sets) Thu, Wed, Brian Haia; Fri, Sat, Mon, Marvin Tevaga; Sun, Josh Kahula; Tue, Ernest Pua`a. Early sets 3-6 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Fri, Wed, Benny Uyetake; Sat, Tue, Mitch Kepa; Sun, Steve Sargenti; Mon, Josh Kahula. Late sets 6-9 p.m.

SOUTH MAUI ■ FOUR SEASONS RESORT WAILEA 3900 Wailea Alanui, 874-8000 Lobby Lounge - (Early sets) Thu, Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran; Sat, Mon, Island Style Trio with hula dancing. Early sets 5:30-7:30 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson; Fri, Clay Mortensen and George Tavoularis; Sat, Mon, Nils and Anastasia; Sun, Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria; Wed, Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata. Late sets 8:3011:30 p.m. Torchlighting ceremony nightly.

■ GRAND WAILEA RESORT HOTEL & SPA 3850 Wailea Alanui, 875-1234 Botero Bar - Wed, 5:30-9:30 p.m., Live music.

Humuhumunukunukuapua`a - Nightly, 5:30 p.m., Strolling Hawaiian Duo. ■ THE FAIRMONT KEA LANI MAUI 4100 Wailea Alanui, 875-4100 Lobby Bar - Nightly, 5:30-9:30 p.m., Live music.

■ THE SHOPS AT WAILEA 3750 Wailea Alanui East Wing - Wed, 6:30-8 p.m., Marti Kluth.

Lower Courtyard - Wed, 6:30-8 p.m., Jamie Lawerence and Friends.

■ WAILEA MARRIOTT 3700 Wailea Alanui, 879-1922 Kumu Bar & Grill - Nightly, Hula dancing. 6-9 p.m.

Mele Mele Lounge - Nighly, Live music. 9-11 p.m.

■ MAUI PRINCE HOTEL 5400 Makena Alanui, 874-1111 Molokini Lounge - Mon, Wed, Fri, Sat, Mele `Ohana Duo. Tue, Thu Ron Kuala’au; Sun-Thu sets 6-9 p.m.; Fri, Sat sets 6-10 p.m. Sun, Mele `Ohana Duo, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Mon, Wed, Fri, Hula performance, 66:45 p.m.

EAST MAUI ■ HOTEL HANA-MAUI Hana, 248-8211 Paniolo Lounge - Thu-Sun, Live music. 6:30-9:30 p.m.

Main Dining Room - Thu, Sun, Hula dancing. 7:308:15 p.m.

Send your listings and photos for the Da Kine Calendar to Kate Bradshaw at calendar@mauitime.com or fax (808) 244-0446

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

27

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

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HOUSES FOR RENT OHANA FOR RENT One bedroom cottage at Lahaina’s Baby Beach. $2500 plus electric, completely furnished. Call 667-6968.

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SIGNLANGUAGE

CAERIEL CRESTIN SIGN.LANGUAGE.ASTROLOGY@GMAIL.COM

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) What you’re up to now is like turning up the air-conditioning so high you need to wear a sweater indoors. You’re overcompensating, and it’ll probably backfire on you. Keep the air-conditioning at fifty degrees and you’ll likely catch a chill. Why are you trying so hard anyway? Is whatever you’re trying so hard to prevent really so disastrous that it merits this much time, energy, and effort? I don’t think so. You have more important things to worry about. Save yourself the stress and the energy bills (both actual and spiritual). Just open the windows, and let whatever wants to happen, happen.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) Don’t pre-judge. What you think are deal-breakers (and usually are), in this case might still be workable. The key here is to keep an open mind about the person in front of you. Could s/he be the exception to the rule? The guidelines you’ve made for yourself haven’t actually gotten you very far in the past, so an exception is precisely what you need, someone who’s able to get away with breaking most of the rules. Letting someone with this much power into your life might be scary, I know, but you already play it way too safe. Scare yourself by giving it a go. You know what fear is called when you embrace it? A thrill.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) Stop making things so hard for yourself. Don’t go get a job in a pastry shop when your plan is to give up sugar. Give yourself more mental breathing room than that. Subjecting yourself to constant, compelling temptation is just about the dumbest thing you could do. Prove that you’re smarter (and less selfdestructive) than that. Your goals are admirable. Please set yourself up so that they’re likely to succeed, not crash and burn horribly. Still confused? I don’t know how to spell it out any more simply, but I’ll try: Self-sabotage is bad. Please make sure you’re not engaging in it, consciously or unconsciously.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) Imagine you accidentally left the baby sitting in his car seat on the sidewalk next to the car at the last rest stop. The second you realized it, you’d tear over to the other side of the highway and race back as fast as you could, kicking yourself the whole time and freaking out until you knew the poor infant was safe. You wouldn’t give a crap about speed limits or traffic rules or anything like that, would you? This is similar, even if it’s less obvious. Don’t worry about looking stupid or desperate. Do what you have to do to make this happen, and most likely that will mean you need to run, don’t walk, and break whatever rules get in your way.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Stop ignoring the facts. What you’re doing right now is examining the scenario and deliberately blinding yourself, saying, “I won’t see anything that’s the color red.” That’s excluding a lot of potentially important information, and isn’t going to lead to you making wise or insightful choices. Whether or not you find these particular facts and details distasteful is irrelevant. Your job here is to be sure you’re making sound, clear decisions, and those are impossible unless you open your eyes to everything, including the stuff you’d rather wasn’t part of the picture.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) What’s the point of buying a fancy phone that can surf the Internet, act as tour guide, take pictures, and mow your lawn, when you’re only ever going to use it as a phone? Keep things as simple as you can this week. You don’t necessarily need all the bells and whistles, so why pay for them (really or metaphorically)? Strip everything down to the bare minimum, and only add in ripples, complications and extras when you’re sure you need them. Be brutal. You won’t feel like you’re missing anything. In fact what you’re most likely to feel is a tremendous weight lifted from your shoulders.

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PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) You could half-ass it and choose the easy but purely temporary solution, or you could really dig in and fix things for the long-term. That would definitely involve a ton more work and thought on your part, but obviously that’s preferable to the alternative, which is essentially the equivalent of wrapping duct tape around the thing. Bad idea. It’s time to either commit to it, repairing it up from the ground up, or walk away from it and let it fall apart. Patching it up for the moment might have worked before, but that’s not the answer anymore. Throw the duct tape away. It’s of no real use to you now.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) Abstract, you’re not. In fact, your motto is very much, “what you see is what you get.” However, spelling it all out and baldly exposing every detail of your psyche isn’t especially romantic or mysterious.

There’s no need to be deliberately obtuse or lie at all, but consider the possibility of fuzzing the details.

An abstract or impressionist painting has a beauty all its own, beauty it wouldn’t possess if it didn’t leave a certain amount of detail to the imagination. How much imagination must people employ when trying to figure you out? Up that total by 10-20% and you’ll be in good shape.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Don’t deprive yourself of the things you need, out of principle. This is not the equivalent of forcing yourself to go without chocolate for a week or two, or cutting down on your TV habit. This is like trying to quit breathing air, or sleeping. You’ll only be able to go without for so long, and then you’ll end up having to make up for lost time. Stop telling yourself that you shouldn’t need what you know you do. That’s just a waste of time. Wishing you didn’t need to eat or love just can’t make it so. Instead, focus on getting your needs —whatever they are—fulfilled in the least impactful way you can, and then you can get around to the stuff that really interests you.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) If your heart were a kitchen, you’d have the refrigerator door gaping and turned all the way up, and the oven wide open, set to broil. You’re not only burning the candle at both ends, but you’re working at cross purposes to yourself. Stop tripping yourself up. Decide what temperature this room ought to be, and turn off the oven or close the fridge. I know it’s hard for you make up your mind and commit to one direction, but it’s about time. Until you do, you’ll just keep using up a ton of energy to go nowhere and accomplish nothing.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) If you own a business with employees, you’ll go nuts if you don’t trust them. Micro-managing everything will set you on a path to a nervous breakdown. Eventually, your best bet is to simply let go and believe that they’ll correctly do what you ask of them. The same holds true of every aspect of your life.

Trying to control the minutiae of what happens when you’re not looking will really screw you up in the long run, even if you can get away with it for a little while. Don’t delude yourself, though. For every second detail you attend to personally, you’ll piss off the person who would’ve taken care of it for you. Then, when you need them to come through for you, they won’t. Trust them sooner, rather than later, before they decide to not bother being worthy of that trust.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) Insanity is sometimes defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. And yet I see people do this all the time. They repeat identical patterns, and act surprised when something similar happens every time. Leos are notoriously bad about this, and yet I know you are also capable of change once you’re convinced it’s necessary. The problem clearly isn’t your flexibility; it’s your reluctance to exercise it. This time around, don’t take so long to figure out and accept that what you’re doing isn’t cutting it, so you can change things up in enough time to get the results you want before they don’t matter.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

29

RESTLESSNATIVE

BY STARR BEGLEY STARR@MAUITIME.COM

Zap!

Come

ROCK with us on

Friday September 5th @ 5 during the Wailuku First Friday Celebration

• FREE Pupus & Refreshments • Get your Band together & come jam!

• Get your pic taken with Obama & McCain

MauiTime Offices: 33 North Market Street • Wailuku 30

AUGUST 28, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

After many long years one of my dreams has come true, folks. No, I’m not engaged to Johnny Depp, and I haven’t won the World Series of Poker or landed a six-figure contract for my novel.

I’ve begun the laser hair removal process!

I know, most people are ashamed to talk about this kind of stuff.

Unwanted body hair? How embarrassing.

But I’ve never been one to shy away from the uncomfortable, so here goes...

I’m a sasquatch. Yes, it’s sad but true. Since I hit puberty, I’ve been battling fuzz (more like boar hair) and it absolutely sucks. I mean, it’s practically like I need a weed whacker to control “The Beast.”

So, the other day my girlfriend called and said that she knew of a doctor who was offering the sweetest deal for laser hair removal. It was only $400 for unlimited sessions. (Disclosure, he advertises here at Maui Time—but believe me I paid full price.) The thing that got me here was “unlimited sessions” because like a stubborn weed, I’m pretty sure that it’s going to take multiple treatments to kill it at the root.

What did I decide to zap? My bikini line of course. More like a Brazilian wax—but permanent.

There was a lot of hemming and hawing over what shape to do. Nori strip? Natural triangle? I mean, it’s gonna look the same when I’m 60 as it does now, so it was a big decision.

I bet you’re wondering what the laser treatment feels like. Does it hurt? Is it mortifying? Let me put it this way: it’s not as bad as pulling teeth, but it’s no therapeutic day at the park. Sometimes it feels like a little slap and other times it feels more like an ant bite. A red ant.

The beauty of it is that it’s over pretty fast. My treatment took about 20 minutes and like I said, I’m on the high end of the spectrum when it comes to body hair.

My girlfriend’s treatment took a lot less time. Where I had 20 zaps, she had two. Not fair, but she has that nice Filipino blood to combat the Portuguese.

I don’t.

I’ll probably have to go back four or so more times and I then it’s home free. No more shaving, no more waxing. FOREVER. How cool is that?

Way, way cool.

So, if you’re looking into it, I would totally say to just go for it. Plus, now you won’t feel so bad because you can go in there knowing that the poor Doc’s seen it all. How many other estheticians can say they’ve worked on Bigfoot?

Starr Begley will write about something intelligent next week. Maybe.

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 28, 2008

31

back

side

The Fastest Growing Privacy Hedge Available!

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Maui’s most beautiful girls, the greatest pupu’s, Lingerie Night Monday and Tuesday with $2 domestic beers. 350 Hoohana Street, next to Oceanic Cable. Open 2pm-2am seven days a week. 871-2182

On The UPside with TERI MAUI’S HOTTEST “CALL-IN” RADIO PROGRAM Tune in every FRIDAY at *NOON* on KAOI 1110 AM. Call in 808-242-7800. Check us LIVE online at www.stickam.com/terionupside

MAUI TATTOO COMPANY Traditional, Custom, Polynesian, Cover-Ups, Portraits & Permanent Makeup. 1945 S. Kihei Rd., under Lu Lu’s. 874-0034

PRE-FORECLOSURE CONDOS Kihei and Central Maui locations. Prices from $89,000 and up. Contact Josh Jerman, Broker 808-283-2222. Century 21 All Islands

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Looking for a roommate?

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TEOMON “Higher Calling” CD Release Party!

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