ISSUE 1,042 - THURSDAY 23RD JUNE 2022

INSIDE THIS ISSUE: Greendale Grower (Continued)

2

National Volunteer Week

2

Sheffield School Art Exhibition

3

Bringing Farmers Together

4

Venues For Hire In Selwyn

5

Bangor Pony Club Fundraiser

6

Ladies Night - Paint & Sip

7

Selwyn MP Update

8

New Bike Park Coming

9

BookCrossing

9

Auto Headlights

9

Annual Hunting Competition

10-11

Dog Registrations

11

Nourish Programme

11

Great Sporting Results

12

Malvern Netball

12

Golf Results

12

Selwyn Libraries

13

Update From St John

13

Save The Date

13

Public Notices

14

Classifieds

14-15

Trades

15-16

Email Column

16

Weekly Newspaper Business Cards ♦ Photocopying ♦ LaminaƟng ♦ Binding ♦ Typeseƫng ♦ ♦

If you know of something newsworthy, we’d like to know too!

Phone: 03 318 7450 Email: info@malvernnews.co.nz Website: www.malvernnews.co.nz

A well-known Greendale grain grower has been making a splash on our television screens recently. Sid Worsfold has been seen in the new Ploughman’s bread advert. This exciting opportunity came about as Sid supplies rye corn to Western Milling, and they were looking for suitable growers to help promote the Ploughman’s brand.

“Filming was delayed a bit due to Covid, but on the actual day the weather was great. It was fairly straight forward and since going to air I have had numerous people recognise me and comment,” said Sid. “The crop season wasn’t the best as it was too wet from December onwards, but we got everything harvested,” Sid concluded.

Ploughman’s is loved for its traditional style, wholesome Kiwi goodness, and with most of its raw ingredients sourced from local grain growers in Mid

Canterbury, the campaign eschews the usual fresh-foodingredients-on-table-top shots for the character of real Mid Canterbury farmers, battling it out for who grows the best grain

ISSUE 1,042 Thursday 23rd June 2022

and seeds. It’s an approach designed to get people to love the brand as much as the bread.

Filmed on location in Mid Canterbury by The Beards and directed by Matt Eastwood, the

campaign features remarkably authentic performances from grain growers like Sid from Greendale, Jock from Ashburton and Craig from Mayfield.

Continued on page 2….

Sid Worsfold from Greendale.

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Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 2

NO APPOINTMENT HAIRCUTS New to the Darfield Hair BouƟque 66 South Terrace Welcoming to the salon our ‘No Appointment Specialist’ for your convenience.

Available 9am - 2:30 (Tuesday to Friday)

Invites you to the

HORORATA

COMMUNITY DINNER

Celebrating 144 years of the Hororata Domain

Friday 1st July, 6:30pm Hororata Hall $35 per person, includes two course buffet dinner.

Cash bar available.

Tickets from Hororata Motors or online www.hororata.org.nz Must be purchased by 28th June.

GREENDALE GROWER ON TV AD ...continued from front page.

James Mok, CCO Proximity NZ commented, “Because Ploughman’s is a bread with hearty character, it deserves to be a brand with hearty character.

It’s never easy working with untrained talent, but we wanted the genuine thing, and these Mid Canterbury farmers didn’t disappoint. These fellas deal with all manner of nature’s challenges to grow quality grains and seeds, so a bit of acting is all in a day’s work. They nailed Ploughman’s down to earth goodness.”

Victoria McCrea, GM marketing, GWF Baking NZ commented, “It’s great to have our local growers featured in our campaign and the authenticity they brought personifies what Ploughman’s Bakery is all about, honest, generous, delicious bread filled with grains and seeds.”

The integrated campaign is running now across digital video, broadcast, social and shopper.

NATIONAL VOLUNTEER WEEK National Volunteer Week (Te Wiki Tūao ā-Motu) honours the collective energies and mana of all volunteers in Aotearoa. It runs from June 19th - 25th, 2022. This year’s theme is ‘Time to Shine (He wā whakawhiti)’. This week was the perfect time to recognise and celebrate volunteers within our community. It’s also Matariki, a

new year and a fresh start; a time to dream (moemoeā) and make plans for the future. Maybe it’s also the right time for some people to take on a voluntary role somewhere in the community. Remember to say an extra thank you to the volunteers you know, it’s important to let them know how valued they are.

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 3

COMMUNITY EXHIBITION Community exhibition month has long been a crowd favourite at Te Huanui for its sense of fun, colour and variety, 2022 will be no different! This year, the first

of the Gallery’s community exhibitions brings the tamariki of Sheffield School to the gallery space.

Sheffield School is super excited

Ella McIlroy with her artwork.

to be a part of the upcoming art exhibition, to be held at Te Huanui Art Gallery. The School has been looking at Matariki and the significance of this celebration. Matariki, also known as Māori New Year, is a time for celebration, growth and renewal.

It's a chance to get together and remember whānau who have died, share food, tell stories, sing and play music. The students have had lots of fun exploring Matariki and what it means to them through the arts and are excited to share their artworks with the wider community!

Student’s works are all for sale, with proceeds going back into the school, with many of the school’s fundraising options cancelled over the last two years due to Covid restrictions.

Sheffield School’s exhibition opens from 3.30pm Thursday, 23rd June and runs until Thursday, 7th July. Please join the Gallery in celebrating the creativity of the students and staff of Sheffield School. Te Huanui is open 11am - 2pm, Tuesday - Thursday and 10am 4pm Friday - Sunday. Please note, the Gallery will be closed for the Matariki public holiday.

See advertisement in this issue for further details.

Lochlan MacMillan with his artwork.

ANNABEL’S EDUCARE & 3 YR & 4 YR OLD KINDERGARTENS 12-16 South Tce, Darfield EDUCARE Opening Hours 7:30am - 5pm

• • •

Educare Ph 318 7943 3 Year Ph 318 7948 4 Year Ph 318 8843

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 4

BRINGING FARMERS TOGETHER The Ruralco Instore Days is a fantastic celebration of all things agricultural, focussed on bringing the rural community together. This year’s event is shaping up to be another exciting opportunity for farmers to network with other farmers and the wider agricultural industry.

“It’s a fantastic opportunity to meet with industry players to hear first-hand about their products, services, new initiatives and technologies which can assist all farming operations,” commented Ruralco Group CEO, Robert Sharkie.

“It’s also a wonderful chance for us to get together again following so many cancelled events. Opportunities for farmers

to meet with other farmers are always worthwhile, and we are looking forward to seeing everyone again.”

This year’s Ruralco Instore Days will be held on Thursday, 7th July and Friday, 8th July.

“We have long recognised that farming can be a lonely vocation, so providing opportunities for farming folk to come together has always been one of the big drivers behind Instore Days.

“We look forward to seeing everyone, either at our marquee at Ruralco Ashburton, or at our Methven or Rakaia stores. We’ll have plenty of refreshments available at all three locations, so come on in, have a chat and access the great deals on offer in store,” added Robert.

This year will see suppliers on-site in Ashburton to discuss individual farming needs across many farm supplies, seed, fertiliser, fuel, energy and service-based card suppliers, with an extensive network of Ruralco retail card suppliers participating through their own retail stores. There are also some great prizes up for grabs.

Members can accumulate entries for this year’s major prizes - a 2022 Honda Pioneer 520 (RRP from $20,119), or a House of Travel voucher worth $10,000 by spending at participating suppliers (terms & conditions apply).

“From small beginnings in 1994, Instore Days has grown and is now likened to a ‘mini field days’

in our Ashburton store, where 2,000 members attending the you can benefit from deals two-day event,” concluded across Ruralco and our suppliers. Robert.

“Recent years have seen See advertisement in this around 100 supplier businesses issue for further details. participating, with more than

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Thursday 23rd June 2022

In Selwyn, we’re fortunate to have over thirty amazing venues suitable for hosting family celebrations, community functions or group events.

From old heritage style halls to modern community centres, there are plenty of options.

For places bursting with character there are a variety of historic halls, such as the beautiful Broadfield Community Centre - a category two listed hall built in the 1870s with a kitchen and situated in a reserve with tennis and netball courts.

Tucked away on Maddisons Road off from the main route to West Melton, sits the Weedons Community Pavilion. This modern venue can host several small to medium sized sporting events, classes, corporate events, workshops, birthday parties and events. Many users of the pavilion say they love the peaceful park location, with good parking and the glass doors that allow for easy access to the grass area outside.

Glentunnel Community Centre is a great space for community functions, school uses and recreational activities such as dance classes. A large outdoor area with an exceptional outlook provides an ideal setting for any occasion.

Just down from the famous Springfield donut, the Tawera Memorial Hall is another ideal location for performances, club meetings or community classes. The spaces range from holding 25 people up to 300.

For more active spaces, venues such as the Darfield and West Melton Community and Recreation Centres offer a variety of affordable venue spaces for community meetings, concerts and sporting fixtures.

Let our team help you find the perfect venue for your next event, fill out a booking enquiry form, use our A to Z list of venues, or search for a venue at: selwyn.govt.nz/venues

Page 5

Weedons Community Pavilion

West Melton Community & Recreation Centre

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 6

BANGOR PC FUNDRAISER Bangor Pony Club is holding a Show Cross ‘Have a Go Day’ fundraiser in July at their grounds. For those unsure about what Show Cross is - it's a round of Show Jumping followed immediately by a round of Cross Country style jumps.

The Club is based at the

Courtenay A&P Showgrounds, and they currently have approximately 37 members and an enthusiastic bunch of parents.

The event will range from poles on the ground up to 80cm, classes will be based on age groups for each height, with additional classes for lead rein and first ridden jumpers.

There will be placings from 1st to 6th for each class, as well as spot prizes donated by generous sponsors, Wildering, Grab Earthwork Solutions and Concrete 2U, to be won as well.

Delicious hot food will be available for pre-purchase with

your entry, as well as some available on the day. There will be a coffee cart on site also.

Bangor Pony Club will be holding a raffle, with the first prize being jump stands with a pole and plank, so remember to take some cash if you wish to purchase some tickets.

Kristal Merry Photography will be there photographing the event to catch those special moments.

This event will be a fun day for all ages and levels. Entries close on June 26th, so get your entries in now.

For further details visit their Facebook page: Bangor Pony Club.

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 7

LADIES NIGHT - PAINT & SIP Paint & Sip Ladies Night was held on Friday 17th June at the Kirwee Rugby Clubrooms.

This was the first, with hopefully more ladies nights in the future, intending to encourage wives, partners and families of players to be part of the fantastic culture that the Kirwee Rugby Club have been building on.

Forty ladies enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere and the stepby-step painting tutorial by Hannah Gavey, from Creative Sparks in Darfield. The evening was a great success and enjoyed by all.

The Club would like to those who donated raffle prizes; • Dalethorpe House • Fat Beagle • More For You • Darfield Bakery • Farmlands, Darfield • Kirwee Challenge.

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Open to view: Sunday 26th June, 1 - 2pm Min Cookson 027 249 5417 min.cookson@pggwrightson.co.nz

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Above: Amelia McKnight, one of the organisers following the step-by-step painting tutorial.

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Prue McCaughan and Jeanette Williamson displaying their talented art works at the recent Paint & Sip night.

Megan Ellis 027 206 1066 03 348 4149 www.whittleknight.co.nz Licensed Real Estate Agents REAA 2008

SELWYN • RESIDENTIAL • LIFESTYLE

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 8

SELWYN MP UPDATE Our Services: • PLOUGHING • CULTIVATION • DISCING • DRILLING • DIRECT DRILLING Ph 027 319 9929

For all your small excavaƟon requirements • Site & Garden Clearance • Lawn ConstrucƟon (Small & Large) • Driveways

• Hole boring (200 – 600) • Sheep & CaƩle Yard Clean Outs • Shingle Supplies

Give Neil a call on 022 451 7207 or email neiljudith@xtra.co.nz

Nothing’s a Problem!

20kg bags or 500kg bulk bags available!

Democracy is the central pillar of our society. Daily I hear concerns from people across Canterbury that our democracy - as we have come to know it - is slowly, but surely, being eroded by the Labour Government.

Just recently, we have seen the Government ploughing ahead with its plans to confiscate water assets and infrastructure of councils and merge them into mega-entities. We here in Canterbury will lose our assets - and 22 South Island councils will be merged into Entity D. The representation of those 22 councils will be stripped down to seven unelected ‘representatives’, as well as seven mana whenua representatives, without us having a say in who any of those representatives will be.

One of the core tenets of a democratic society is, of

course, equal voting rights.

There are at least two other deeply concerning situations occurring right now, where the Labour Government is ignoring those rights.

While it currently appears to be reluctantly walking back its support for the undemocratic Rotorua District Council Bill which would have swept away the principle of equal voting rights for all New Zealanders in the district - it is still pressing on with the equally undemocratic Canterbury Regional Council (Ngāi Tahu Representation) Bill.

They didn’t really have a choice on the Rotorua Bill, after their own Attorney General pointed out that it is discriminatory and in breach of the Bill of Rights.

But, under the Ngai Tahu Bill, which has passed its second reading, the people of Canterbury would elect 14 councillors. Everyone gets a vote - Māori, Pakeha and everyone else. And then something extraordinary happens. Ngāi Tahu appoints two more councillors. No voting and no election.

This, despite less than 100 submissions out of 1,600 favouring the idea.

I am a big fan of Ngai Tahu. They are a true New Zealand success story, and I applaud the Runanga for its vision and its ambition and the crucial role they play in the Canterbury culture, society and economy. But these two seats are not Māori wards, allocated proportionately to the population, they are an appointment by an independent entity - Ngāi Tahu.

This is a dramatic and radical change to the way we choose our Government in New Zealand.

The idea of equal suffrage equal voting rights, regardless of gender, class and ethnicity - has been a pillar of our democracy for over a century. All New Zealanders should have an equal say in who governs them; an equal say in appointing the people that make the decisions that affect their lives.

These concepts - equal voting rights and accountability at the ballot box - are basic to our democracy, and they are precious.

Why this Labour Government thinks they can casually move away from these principles without discussion by supporting a Local Bill is beyond me.

If we as a country no longer think that equal voting rights apply at one level of government, pressure will build for change in national elections.

I can’t think of a more divisive agenda for any government to run.

We recognise the burden of history, but no past injustices are fixed by undermining something that makes this country the great place it is - preserving the pillars of our open democracy.

If Jacinda Ardern and her Government Ministers no longer think that Kiwis should have equal voting rights, then they should make the case and ask New Zealanders whether they agree.

Nicola Grigg, Selwyn MP.

FOREST MULCH  BARK MULCH  BLACK FOREST MULCH  BARK NUGGETS (10/20MM) UNSCREENED BARK  SCREENED SOIL  WAIPAPA LIME CHIP  SCHIST STEPPING STONES  PUNGA LOGS PREMIUM ORGANIC COMPOST  MACROCARPA SLEEPERS  RAILWAY SLEEPERS (PINE - 2.1M LENGTHS) LANDSCAPE BOULDERS  PAPAROA RED ROCK (3 GRADES: 4MM, 12.25MM & 25MM PLUS) Pick up or delivery available (charges apply)  WINZ Quotes  Eftpos available

Kindling & Dry, shed stored, native wood!

(Pick up or delivery - charges apply) FREE DELIVERY TO DARFIELD TOWNSHIP WHEN 3 CUBE OR MORE IS ORDERED!

PHONE: 03 975 4502  Address: 417 Creyke Road, Darfield HOURS: Monday to Friday 6am - 6pm, Saturday 8am - 1pm, or after hours by appointment.

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 9

NEW BIKE PARK COMING In 2021, a group from Darfield High School, whom all share an interest in biking, heard that there is money available to apply for community-based projects (Westview Fund). It was decided to apply for some money to create an area with some jumps and a pump track, for people of all ages to enjoy and improve their skills on.

We first applied for funding in September 2021, but were told that even though it was a good concept, more details were required.

In late March 2022, we started to update our application, and had meetings with relevant people from the Council to take advantage of their expertise and give us insight into how the logistics will work. We also made contact with Darfield Primary School, who after brainstorming came back to us with some drawings and designs. It was great to be able to incorporate

ideas from the young people in the community.

We then put hours into making the application perfect, this included finding places similar to what we were applying for and adding links for photos and videos.

After an anxious wait, the Westview committee approved

funding of up to $200,000 for the project. We are extremely excited and keen to get stuck in.

Thank you very much to all the people who have helped us along the way.

HOMEKILL

PROCESSING SERVICE NEW: Paddock to Plate Service Mobile slaughterman available!

Jason Dickens (DHS teacher), Jack Guy and Joshua Wilson (DHS students).

For fast efficient service, please call us to book your slaughter and processing!

Tel 03 317 9497 • Mob 027 355 0451 www.greendalebutchery.co.nz

For all your spraying requirements •

Back: Darfield High School students, Jack Guy and Joshua Wilson.

Front: Darfield Primary School students, Kelsey, Jack and Ryan.

• •

Get in touch to discuss your needs for the upcoming season Operating 24m boom No job too big or small, all areas covered

BOOKCROSSING The BookCrossing world has recently found Darfield.

This initiative involves people releasing their books ‘into the wild’ for a stranger to find, or via ‘controlled release’ to another BookCrossing member, and tracking where they go via journal entries from around the world. Since April 2001, BookCrossing has been the World's Library. It's a smart social networking site, and it's a celebration of literature and a place where books get new life, and people are simply connected through books. There are currently approximately

1,943,686 BookCrossers and 13,852,356 books travelling throughout 132 countries. This book community is changing the world and touching lives one book at a time.

How do people do it?

Label. Share. Follow. Breath new life into books instead of letting your old favourites collect dust pass them along to another reader. The BookCrossing online archival and tracking system allows members to connect with other readers, journal and review literature, as well as trade and follow their books as lives are changed through ‘reading and

releasing’. Users are able to tag and track their individual books by marking them with BCIDs (BookCrossing Identity Numbers).

Each BCID is unique to each book - once it’s registered on the Book Crossing website, the book can then be followed and journaled forever. BookCrossing is free to join and free to play. So don't be 'shelf'ish with your books - read and release!

If you would like to find out more or be part of the world of books visit: www.bookcrossing.com

Ph Murray 021 0297 6064

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AUTO HEADLIGHTS Many new vehicles are fitted with automatic headlights, which rely on ambient light levels rather than on vision and visibility as you see them, so they won’t always get it right.

They use a photoelectric sensor that’s usually mounted on top of the dash, or the windshield near the rearview mirror. Heavy rain or fog during the daytime can reduce your vision and vehicle visibility to dangerous levels, but

it might still be bright enough to prevent automated lights from coming on.

Automatic lights also might take a little time to react to changing light conditions too - so if you drive into a tunnel it's best to switch your lights on manually. If you are unsure if your automatic lights have come on and visibility isn’t great, it’s safer to manually turn on your headlights.

Rural Fields Your agricultural contracƟng partner Ploughing

Cultivation

Drilling

Mowing

David: 027 659 6596 Sean: 027 466 7739 E: ruralfields@xtra.co.nz

www.ruralfields.co.nz

Page 10

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 11

ANNUAL HUNTING COMPETITION Malvern Game Hunters are set to get their twenty ninth annual Hunting Competition underway on the last weekend of July 2022. As it is one of the largest hunting events in the South Island, organisers are once again expecting a large number of entries.

The competition will begin on Friday, July 29th and will run through to 2pm on Sunday, July 31st. Weigh-in will be held at the Coalgate Tavern on the Sunday, between 11am and 2pm, followed by the prizegiving.

As in previous years, a large number of quality Spot Prizes are on offer, including a Dogbox valued at $1,800 sponsored by Silverline and a pair of Leupold Binoculars valued at $1,299, sponsored by LD Rural Fencing.

These are over and above the monetary prizes available for the heaviest animals and the best Douglas scores.

In the boar section, Coalgate Tavern are sponsoring $500 for the sought after average weight as well as $500 for the random weight. There are also random

weight prizes for Red and Fellow Stags.

There are also prizes for the most rabbits, hares and possums shot by an individual, as well as magpies which is new this year.

The new magpie category was requested by the sponsor, as he's in pest control and he said there's a real need to reduce the number of magpies.

There are a few other new prizes and categories this year - 1st and 2nd Judge’s Choice. The winners will receive a $500 voucher from Caliber Taxidermy and High Country Taxidermy. This section entails judges choosing the animal that would make a great mount by a Taxidermist, out of the Douglas scoring section (pig, deer, chamois or thar). The animal doesn't have to be the highest Douglas score, but for example, could instead be chosen for its unusual characteristics.

Bow shooting has also been introduced this year, which is sponsored by Arrowhead Archery Australasia and Nexxus Bowhunting. This exciting new

category was adopted after a conversation between a Club member and the owner of Arrowhead Archery (located in Darfield) took place. They both agreed there was a lack of categories in hunting competitions for bow hunters, so proposed we add some.

One of the drawcard events at the final weigh-in will undoubtedly be the Kids’ Carrying competition (12noon start) and Open Pig Carrying competition for men and women (2pm start). A perennial favourite and always a good photo opportunity, the competitions are expected to be fiercely contested and create much spectator interest from the expected large crowd in attendance.

President of the Club, Jarrad Simpson commented that the event is bound to be, once again, an outstanding and enjoyable event for all those participating.

Join our Facebook page: ‘Nourish Community Garden Darfield’ The Community Garden and Pantry are located at Almond Park, Russell Street, Darfield. A group of community garden workers meet on Wednesdays at 9am.

All are welcome to join in.

GARDEN FOCUS FOR JULY: • • • • • • • •

• •

Like us on facebook.

DOG REGISTRATIONS Owners can pay the registration online, in person at Rolleston council offices or at any of our service centres in Lincoln, Darfield or Leeston.

If owners pay their dog registration by 31st of July, they will get a discounted fee of $45.

After that the full fee applies which is $60.

In 2021, Selwyn District Council introduced a metal tag (One Tag) which is designed to last the dog’s lifetime. One Tag replaced the old plastic tag that dog owners had to swap every year they renewed their dog’s registration.

Come and enjoy good company and stimulating discussion, along with a cuppa and snacks, and watch the newly released documentary by Happen Films.

‘Together We Grow’ showcases a charity in Lower Hutt called ‘Common Unity’ where they encourage urban food gardening and host ‘The ReMakery’.

Please bring a face mask and a cosy blanket.

•

Online entries available at: www.malverngamehuntersclub.com

Last week Selwyn’s dog owners would have received a notice from the Council, letting them know that their dog’s registration needs to be renewed.

All dog registrations in New Zealand expire on 30th of June each year, regardless of when they were first registered.

“Selwyn district has one of the highest ownerships of dogs in the country. There are over 16,000 registered dogs in Selwyn, with on average 120 new dogs coming into the district each week,” commented Council’s Regulatory Manager Susan Atherton.

FILM AND DISCUSSION EVENING

“So unless you are registering a new dog, we won’t be issuing another tag this year,” concluded Susan.

For more information on dog registration, fees and how to make the payment visit: www.selwyn.govt.nz/ dogregistration.

Sow onion seed in deep trays inside Plant shallots directly in the garden Select a few prime onion bulbs a plant them directly in the garden if you want to save onion seed this summer Start chitting potatoes for an early planting in mid August If you have space inside, start sowing peppers, eggplant and tomato seeds for early seedlings for the greenhouse Sharpen and maintain pruners, secateurs and spades Start the winter pruning of apple and pear trees Clean saved seed and store it in a cool, dry place Do a stocktake of your seeds for next season, and don’t leave it too late to order seeds as shops are running low in some areas Collect manure for your compost bin Wash down the walls of your tunnel/glass house to let in more winter light, and add compost and amendments to the soil in preparation for early spring planting.

FREE FILM EVENING

Together We Grow Thursday 30th June, 7:30pm

Darfield BapƟst Church (15 Greendale Rd, Darfield) ‘Nourish Community Garden - Darfield’ Community Garden meets Wednesdays 9-11am at Almond Park, Darfield.

“YOUR LOCAL VETS IN ROLLESTON”

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 12

GREAT SHOOTING RESULTS Over the past month, local shooters have been in the full swing of travelling to Championships all over the South Island. Most recently were the Canterbury Championships in Christchurch (18th June) and the Coronation Championships in Ashburton (19th June).

Three students from Darfield High School, Liam Barnhill, Piper Benbow and Ryan Booth formed a school team and attended both, taking out the top spot at each event. Liam placed third in C Grade and also gained his Marksman Badge at the Canterbury Championships.

The Malvern Miniature Rifle Association had shooters young and old from all three of the

clubs attend the Canterbury Championships, Michael Oakley and Karl Ridgen from Hororata, Piper and Liam from Darfield and Graeme Oakley and Glenn Ufton from West Melton.

Michael placed second in D Grade, Karl was in the top ten out of B, C and D Grades (so went through to the final), Graeme came third in the Benchrest, with Glen coming in fifth in a very tight competition.

Queen's Birthday weekend saw Piper, Liam and Ryan travel to Blenheim to shoot the Marlborough Championships.

The first event at the Marlborough Range was a great experience, but scores were lower than expectations.

Piper and Liam competed in the RSA Air Rifle Championships on Saturday morning. This competition was shot at 10 metres and was 60 shots standing. Finals are head to head with previous scores discarded.

For Liam, this was his very first time shooting an air rifle match, and competed well despite his lack of experience, finishing in second place in the men’s competition. He also shot his first final, placing second in the men’s final. Piper came second in the women's match and first in the final.

On Sunday, we all attended the Nelson Championships with mixed results, as all shooters

adjusted to a different range and lighting. Monday was the Saxton Championships (Nelson), and Liam pulled out all the stops shooting his very first hundred.

The maximum you can shoot is 100.10, and Liam shot 100.5.

That helped him to third place in C Grade and a Marksman Badge.

It has been so great to see people in our Association travelling and doing well at Championships around the country. Back at our home ranges, it is great to see the kids in each of the three clubs doing well. There has been a lot of personal bests shot lately.

Piper Benbow.

MALVERN NETBALL

WAIMAK GOLF Results 16th June 2022 Women’s Golf MATCH OF THE DAY: INVITE TO MEN SPLIT SIXES (STABLEFORD) 18 Holes: J Deans & A Douglas 44 S Macdonald & G Tallot 41 I Beets-Huchshorn & G Inch 39 W Mehrtens & J Collins 39 S King & J Allan 39 L Smith & J Metcalfe 38 S Farrar & N Starkie 37 S Mardon & A Blatch 37 M Te Awa & D Judson 37 S Gillespie & C Bush 37

GREENDALE GOLF Results 18th June 2022 Competition: Cridge Trophy Round 5 Stroke Play.

1st: D Rutter 68 2nd: R Ford 71 3rd: J Camp 71 4th: G Marsh 71 5th: P Youngman 72 6th: C Faithful 73 Closest to the Pins: #3: S Johnstone #9: S Lloyd #13: D Rutter #17: D Mclaren Men’s Longest Drive: P Youngman Ladies Longest Putt: J Redfern Longest Putt: J Camp Two’s: J Redfern, D Rutter

Malvern Miniature Rifle Association Season Aggregate 2022 Week 10

Average

Master Grade > 97.75 John Wilson

97.4

97.3

A Grade 96.5 - 97.74 Regan Dalley

97.1

97.5

Piper Benbow

98.5

97.1

Nick Oakley

95.2

95.8

B Grade 94.00 - 96.49 Alex Robinson

94.4

Karl Ridgen

93.1

95.4 95.7

Paul Still

96.2

95.7

Craig Benbow

94.3

93.8

Barry Hill

93.2

93.0

C Grade 90.00 - 93.99

Liam Barnhill with his first hundred shot at Saxton Championships.

Liam Barnhill

95.1

Blake Woolley

90.1

93.5 92.2

Seth Wright

88.0

89.3

Sarah Kennedy

92.2

92.6

David Barnhill

87.0

90.3

Bruce Wilson

93.0

90.6

D Grade < 90.00

Gemma Smith (player/coach) with Selwyn President, Andrea James.

The line up shooting air rifle at RSA Air Rifle Championships.

The Malvern Netball Association attended the Canterbury Country Netball 2022 Field Day on Sunday, 19th June. The event was hosted by the Selwyn Netball Centre at Lincoln, and Malvern entered two Senior teams and a U16 Development team. The Malvern Black Senior team were Runner-Up of the Senior Grade, winning the

Stevenson Tray for the first time since the competition began in 1972, that we know of.

The following people were part of the Malvern Black team: Sam Adams, Bee Frew, Emma Wilson, Ashleigh Bowater, Ashleigh Collier, Amy Falloon, Heleni Carter, Gemma Smith (player/coach) and Jan Thomas (manager).

Lexi Thompson-Hall

90.3

90.2

Jayden Hugh

90.1

87.9

Felix Jennings

89.0

89.9

Hamish Kershaw

88.2

86.5

Blake Tamehana

94.3

87.0

Zak Kershaw

82.0

85.0

Bench Rest - A Grade > 97.5 Glenn Ufton

99.7

Graeme Oakley

98.6

99.1 98.4

Wayne Stott

97.3

96.4

Bench Rest - B Grade < 97.5 Steve Mildenhall

93.4

96.2

Rodger Hughes

97.3

95.6

Glen Hitchcock

95.5

96.5

Jayden Hitchcock

91.1

92.6

Ross Hutton

86.0

86.5

For further information visit their Facebook page: Malvern Miniature Rifle Association.

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 13

SELWYN LIBRARIES Darfield Library and Service Centre will be closed for refurbishment from June 20th until July 4th.

On Mondays, Wednesdays and Friday (1st July) the Edge Connector Vehicle will be located at the Darfield Recreation and Community Centre, North Terrace, Darfield.

Mondays from 9am - 12pm, Wednesdays from 2pm - 4:30pm, Friday (1st July only), from 2pm - 4:30pm.

A range of services will be available at the community centre including our digital tech experiences, lending, returning books, pick-up of holds, Wi-Fi, printing and some regular programmes such as Discovery Time and LEGO Club. They are unable to process Council payments, but can help you complete the payment online or give them a call for assistance.

There is lots of activities for everyone run through Selwyn Libraries. Below is a list of some of them, but visit their website for a full list and further details: www.selwynlibraries.co.nz/ wha.../eventsandprogrammes Some Matariki events are on now until July 3rd: • Te Waihora Art Workshops.

Join us as we explore the work of renowned Ngāi Tahu artist and weaver Cath Brown (1933 2004) and her source of inspiration, Te Waihora (Lake

Ellesmere).

You will learn about Te Waihora as an important habitat for taonga species, and create your own artwork to take home.

Aimed at 8+ years. Children under 8 need an adult to stay and help. Free event, bookings required.

• Under the Stars Storytime • Waterways Workshop • Rama Tuna Paper Sculpture Workshop.

Leeston Library, 19 Messines Street, Leeston. Saturday 25th June 1:30pm - 3pm, Thursday 30th June 6:30pm - 8pm.

Join artist Piri Cowie (Ngāi Tahu, Ngā Puhi, Ngāti Kahu) in learning more about the cultural significance of Tuna (eels), Hao to Kāi tahu whānui.

Rama Tuna refers to going eeling with a light. Create a paper cutout sculpture on this theme and display your artwork for the public during Matariki.

Suitable for 8+ years. Free.

Bookings required.

• Mahinga Kai with Manu • Whakaora Te Ahuriri: A Wetland for Te Waihora Documentary Screening and Q&A • Whakaata Mai te Kūkūwai: Reflections from the Wetlands Exhibition.

Fly Fishing Workshop: Saturday 25th June, 1:45pm 3:45pm, at Darfield Recreation and Community Centre.

Keen to learn more about fly fishing? Local guide expert, Martin Langlands of Troutlands

The Darfield Shooting Centre hopes to include an Archery division to join the existing clubs.

Those interested in this growing sport are invited to discuss the above on

Wednesday, July 6th, 7:30pm at the Centre (corner of Creyke/Telegraph Roads).

The speaker will be Mathew D’Ath of Arrowhead Archery.

For more information please ring Mathew on 027 584 6974 or Jules on 03 318 2632.

will share tips and tricks for effective casting and fly tying, sight fishing and fishing ethics.

The free workshop still has spaces available.

Virtual Reality (VR) Drop-in Sessions: Ages 13 and over. Thursday 23rd June and Thursday 30th June.

Leeston: 2pm - 4pm, Darfield: 3:30pm - 4:30pm, Lincoln: 3:30pm - 5:30pm, Te Ara Ātea: 3:30pm - 4:30pm.

Open Mic Afternoons: Sunday 26th June, 1pm - 3pm, Te Ara Ātea, 56 Tennyson Street, Rolleston.

Take the opportunity to perform, or just enjoy listening to local talent.

Granny Squares for a Cause Darfield: Monday 27th June, 9:30am 12pm, Wednesday 29th June, 2pm - 4:30pm, at the Darfield Recreation and Community Centre.

Join us this winter in spreading a little warmth and cheer, by creating crocheted or knitted granny squares that will be combined to form blankets, for donation within the Selwyn District.

Squares will need to be roughly 10cm² and other than that there are no rules, any colour, any design, all will be gratefully received.

Completed squares need to be dropped off at an Edge Connector visit, or at one of the Selwyn Libraries by 31st July 2022.Children under 8 years must be accompanied by a parent. This event is free, bookings are not required.

The media continues to stress the need for vaccinations against Influenza and Covid viruses. There is a high prevalence of respiratory related illness in all local communities, leading to general un-wellness and time away from work. It is having a big impact on schools, with both staff and students succumbing to sickness. It is important that we are up to date with Covid boosters and Flu vaccines. With borders now relaxed, we are exposed to visitors with viruses that have not been circulating in the local population since before Covid.

Pressure on healthcare services is increasing as a result. Be prepared with any normal medication as well as Paracetamol, keep fluids up, isolate where practical, as well as wear masks, especially if frequently coughing or sneezing. Whereas symptoms may be similar between Covid and Flu, it is important that if not sure, a RAT to rule out Covid is a good idea, and following the rules as appropriate. There are incidences of people getting a second dose of Covid, so we cannot rule that out.

New Zealand is celebrating National Volunteer Week from 19th 25th June. It is a time to acknowledge all the work volunteers do within our communities, supporting clubs, welfare, school communities, etc. An important part of our communities is the presence of Emergency services. Both Fire and Ambulance are volunteer based organisations locally, and their time is given freely to serve where needed. This continues despite other pressures of sickness, resources, employment and so on.

Looking back through St John numbers, it is interesting to see that there are over thirty people past or present that have given over twenty years each to the organisation locally, and a good number less than that as well, but still a significant time contribution. I am sure there will be similar numbers within the FENZ brigades in each local community. This is amazing!

This is maybe a chance for you to consider whether you have some time to give to FENZ or St John. Both organisations continue to need crews for their respective service and would welcome the chance to have a chat and find out how you may be able to be a part of that.

Training, uniforms and resources are provided. Your commitment would be enthusiasm and time. Have that chat.

Winter is here with a vengeance after a kind autumn. The days are shorter, the light is poorer. Be careful and considerate to others.

Drive to the conditions. Our resilience is reduced as we head through winter and on to spring. Traffic density increases with increased local tourism and ski fields open, impacting on our local areas. Another long weekend means a chance to travel may be, so be safe out there, keep well, and respect others as they make the most of the break.

Ross Meder,St John, Darfield.

To find out more about becoming a volunteer visit: join.stjohn.org.nz

Details were correct to our knowledge at the time of going to print, but may be subject to change due to Covid.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

23Jun - 7Jul 25th June 25th June 25th June 28th June 28th June 29th June 29th June 30th June 1st July 6th July 8th July 8th July 9 - 13 July 29th July 29 - 31 July 1st Oct 15th Oct

6:30pm 7pm 7:30pm 10am 12pm 7:30pm 7:30pm 6:30pm 7:30pm 5pm 5pm

Sheffield School Art Exhibition (Opening 3:30pm 23rd Jun) Te Huanui Gallery SDC - Dinners of Selwyn (Sheffield) Sheffield Community Hall DRFC - Dress Up Box Party DRFC Clubrooms Mid-Winter Christmas Celebration Fundraiser Kirwee Community Hall Catch Up with Mayor Sam Broughton Darfield Bakery Darfield MenzShed AGM 26 McLaughlins Rd, Darf Malvern Community Board Drop-in Meeting Darfield Library Traditional Celtic Music by Rennie Pearson Sheffield Community Hall Nourish - Free Film Evening (Together we Grow) Darfield Baptist Church Hororata Community Dinner Hororata Hall Darfield Shooting Centre - Archery Discussion Meeting Shooting Centre, Creyke Rd Applications for Westview Special Fund close today CPWL Environmental Management Fund applications close today Malvern Parish Book Fair Trinity Church Hall Deadline for Entries for Hunting Competition 29th Malvern Game Hunters Hunting Competition Malvern Parish - While Elephant Malvern Parish - Spring Fair & Plant Sale

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 14 PUBLIC NOTICES

PUBLIC NOTICES

INC

TERM 3 & 4 ENROLMENTS OPEN Piano, keyboard, vocals, violin/viola, cello, recorder, guitar, community ukulele group, music theory & composition.

Contact Lynn Meder 03 318 8712 admin@malvernschoolofmusic.kiwi.nz

Malvern Parish Book Fair Sat 9th - Wed 13th July 2022 Trinity Church Hall WANTED: Used Books, Jigsaw Puzzles, DVDs & CDs

ACCOUNTANTS

CATS on Courtenay

CATTERY BASED IN OXFORD Run solely for the comfort & convenience of the cats!

Pick-up & delivery available.

Save the Dates:

‘Angelcatscattery’ Phone Julia: 03 312 1452 or 021 0424 367 Email: angelcats@xtra.co.nz | Web: angelcatscattery.vpweb.co.nz

Read the Malvern & Rolleston News’ online at www.malvernnews.co.nz CHURCH NOTICES

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

Darfield Life Church

CHURCH NOTICES

SUNDAY 26TH JUNE 2022 At 10:30am

Steve & Patience Pona Ph: 022 642 5805 17 North Terrace, Darfield

Brown - Nancy Elizabeth (late of Whitecliffs) 5 Oct 1926 – 11 May 2022

DRIVEWAYS

Craig and Sally, along with Ann, Warwick, Nikki and families would like to thank everyone for their messages of sympathy following Nancy’s death.

Lifestyle, farm tracks, yards and dairy lanes our speciality!

Screened rotten-rock, it’s local & lasts better.

Please phone Springfield Quarry on 318 4132.

As some addresses are unknown, please accept this as a personal Acknowledgement.

FOR SALE

ARE you wasting your DARFIELD Automotive. Service GOOD quality meadow hay. Gras and red clover. Small bales. valuable time trying to & warrant centre. 3D wheel Pick up Greendale. Lots keep up with your accounts? aligner. 7:30am - 5:30pm, Call us now for hassle-free Monday - Friday. Your oneavailable, $8 per bale. Phone accounting, tax and business stop auto shop! Phone 318 8072. advice - all right on 03 318 8113.

HAY. Good quality. Shed stored. your doorstep. Sterling Kirwee area. Conventional Accountants @ Malvern CARPET bales. Lucerne $10 per bale, Business Hub, Ann-Maree Meadow $9 per bale. Phone.

NEED carpet?

Go local!

021 215 0981.

318 1964.

Very competitive pricing, seldom beaten. 30 years TWO saddles in very good condition. Stock saddle, near servicing this area. In new condition and a NZ home sample service, also Western saddle. Selling repairs and installations. together at $600. Phone Please phone Alan Roberts CATTERY 029 0200 9295.

021 227 2080.

WOOD shavings - untreated, clean shavings suitable for CHIMNEY CLEANING horse stables, calving sheds, CARRS Chimney Cleaning. chicken houses and rabbit Servicing the Selwyn district. hutches. Available in Boutique $70 per chimney. Phone 70L bags, 1m 3 bales Rodney on 03 324 2999 and (compressed) and bulk Boarding leave a message. delivery. Phone 03 344 1676 Cattery!

CHIM Chim. We'll sweep your for more details. log-burners flue, check the • Purpose built, nestled firebricks, baffles, air-tubes GARDENING in a tranquil, rural setting.

• Close proximity to all and controls. We're experts main centres. on coal-ranges, also sweeping GARDENING, handyman. All jobs any sized open fire. We quote considered. Please phone Phone: 027 433 3564 and undertake repairs, flue 021 2070532. www.catsoncourtenay.nz Check us out on Facebook! extensions and install bird GENERAL garden maintenance ‘CATS ON COURTENAY’ in Darfield area. Domestic netting. Phone 021 939 113. hedge trimming, pruning & CATTERY CATTERY edging. Please phone Kane 027 467 6613.

No Magazines or School Text Books.

Books to be dropped off at Trinity Church. If the door is closed please leave in the porch area undercover as this will be checked daily. From Wed 6th July books will be received at the Trinity Hall on Greendale Rd.

1st Oct - White Elephant 15th Oct - Spring Fair & Plant Sale

AUTOMOTIVE

FIREWOOD & COAL

FIREWOOD & COAL

COAL

FOR SALE Phone 318 1530 R K FIREWOOD Supplying wood for this Winter!

Old Man Pine, Bluegum, Macrocarpa, Oregon.

TRY THE HOT MIX! EŌpos available.

All top quality, clean wood.

Ph Rini 027 451 7300

Lots of dry wood, ready to burn!

FREE DELIVERY CALL HORORATA FIREWOOD

03 318 0705 or 027 781 1492

A variety of Firewood still available for burning this winter 2022!

Phone 03 312 4637 or 021 260 4520 WINZ Email: e.wakelin@outlook.com APPROVED

Thursday 23rd June 2022 HANDYMAN

Page 15

ROOF MAINTENANCE

SCRAP METAL

VETERINARIAN

WINDOW TINTING

HANDYMAN, gardening All jobs ROOF & property services. 2 W A N T E D ! B e s t p r i c e s ! VETERINARIAN with thirty plus TINT-A-WINDOW Solar Protective considered. Please phone storey work! Roof leak repairs Amalgamated Scrap Ltd. years experience. Licensed films. Fade UV block. (incl Butynol), moss control, B u y i n g c a r s & f a r m US/NZ. Available for house 021 2070532.

Heat Glare control. Privacy. silicone seal, spouting clean & machinery. Specialising in farm calls and telemedicine.

Safety/Security. Frosted HEDGE TRIMMING repairs, spider & fly control, clean-ups. Rod McQuoid - www.facebook.com/Bullville films. Free online quotes. bird proofing, roof painting. buyer. Please phone either Animal Hospital. Please Phone 0800 368 468.

All roof & spouting types. 027 695 0480 or alternatively contact me by phoning info@tintawindow.co.nz 0800 030 712.

Call Arthur’s, 7 days, www.tintawindow.co.nz 021 152 5990.

03 347 2635, 027 484 7980 THERAPEUTIC MASSAGE or 027 584 7980.

WINDOW REPAIRS BEAT the winter blues with WINDOW REPAIRS Hedges great & small a hot aromatherapy oil ROOM TO RENT Specialising in  Retrofit Double glazing therapeutic back, neck and under pivot/gorse  Frameless showers & all general trimming shoulders massage. Choice of SINGLE lockable rooms  Repairs three blends: Relaxing, ANDY WAGHORN in Darfield Hostel. Internet,  Mirrors Energizing or Immune sky TV. $170pw. Phone 027 686 8004  Splashbacks supportive.

Only $40 for 30  Pet doors and more 027 479 1431 or 318 3660. rghtrimming@gmail.com www.rghtrimming.co.nz min. Appointments between RGH Trimming 9am and 8pm. Contact Erna SERVICES Henning on 027 300 4002 (Darfield).

Locally owned and operated Hedge Trimming in Canterbury

Call Don today on 021 066 3011 or 03 318 2983 • Half size tractor for easier access

• Up to 6m height topped at 5m or less

• Branch size up to 50mm • Cutter drops material to side of hedge.

LOCKSMITH LOCKSMITH Selwyn based 24hr mobile service, keys cut and general lock and safe maintenance. EFTPOS available. Call Locktight Security 021 171 8060.

PAINTING & DECORATING

Looking for

LARGE TREE SHELTERBELTS!

Will pay good money for the right trees, any species considered.

WE CAN START IMMEDIATELY!

Clean & tidy workers.

Fully qualified crew for the job!

Call Rini on

027 451 7300 SHEEP SHEARING

MOBILE SHEEP

SHEARING Drenching Foot Trimming Crutching General Animal Welfare Advice.

Call Shaun Adams for a quote on

• • • •

021 204 1274 SITUATION WANTED

021 125 1613

EMPLOYMENT wanted in the wider Darfield area. I have over 20 years experience in wholesale/retail sales, staff management, office admin.

Anything considered. Please phone Karlyn 027 631 9006.

FULLY INSURED

PAINTING & DECORATING

‘For

all your decorating needs’

Micky Conway

Painter & Decorator Darfield Based Will cover all areas Contact Micky on

TENANCY RURAL Tenancy Inspections & Property Maintenance.

Contact Rebecca, by phone 027 313 2270, or email rebecca@ruraltenancy.co.nz WANTED AMMUNITION and reloading equipment. Powder projectiles, presses etc. Any calibre rifle / shotgun.

Anything hunting related.

Cash buyer. Contact Rob 03 342 5885.

DEAD Cars - we buy dead cars, end of life cars, scrap cars, old farm vehicles. Cash paid.

Phone 027 484 8121.

RECORDS, DVD’s, CD’s and books. Please phone Rodney 03 324 2999 and leave a message.

WINDOW CLEANING WINDOW CLEANING SERVICES

Andrew Love

Contract Window Cleaning Commercial  ResidenƟal Free Quotes E: torque_roll@hotmail.com

M: 021 818 816

COUNTRY TOUCH

conwaydecor@hotmail.com

Udi Painting & Decorating For all Painting and Decorating services!

Interior & Exterior Painting & Plastering

Fully Qualified  Wallpapering Roof Painting  Quality Services Free Quotes.

Contact Udi Aale 021 074 2075

‘Friendly & experienced professional service!’

Darfield, Burnham, Greendale, Hororata, Sheffield, Springfield, Coalgate & Kirwee areas, phone or text

Darryl on 027 316 9968 All other areas, including West Melton & Rolleston, phone or text

Wilf on 022 044 0654

03 318 3003 TRADES

www.hunterglass.co.nz TRADES

Thursday 23rd June 2022

Page 16

Daily On Site Sales & Servicing

Authorised Service Agent for Most Brands since 1996!

• Ovens Machines • Cooktops • Dryers • Washing Machine • Dishwashers Hire from $8 p.w.

Darfield based with over 38 years of local knowledge and experience

• Washing

Reg. Service Technician

Septic Tank Cleaning Jetting Unit for blocked drains Camera Investigations | Port-a-loo hire Office 318 8609 | 0274 338 693 | admin@leechdrainage.co.nz TRADES

Qualified Certifying Plumber & Gasfitter

NEW kitchens, wardrobes, laundries or what ever you need! Remodelled or just new doors. Good advice, good price. Ring Lex 03 349 0150 or 027 439 3926.

JAMES Hunt Residential Ltd. Renovation Specialists.

Registered Master Builder.

Please phone 027 466 0092. www.jameshuntresidential.co.nz

david wilkinson registered electrician phone 03 318 1231 fax email

03 318 1235 sales@electricalcontractors.co.nz

po box 26 kirwee

we’ll be there when you need us. guaranteed.

on time guaranteed or your first hour is free! conditions apply.

Tiler & Registered House & Roof Pre-Paint Wash Hydro Drain Cleaning Cleans most surfaces: fences, paths, brick, block, wood, concrete & machinery.

Moss Treating:

roofs, footpaths & driveways.

Water Proofer Look me up on www.mytradesman.co.nz

or phone 03 318 1973 or 027 421 1637 e: bowentiling@gmail.com

Free Quotes. Ph Mike Richards 03 318 8380 or 021 179 0584

Heat pump supply, installation, servicing & maintenance All major brands Contact Nigel now for your no obligation free quote

P: 021 387 750 E: nigel@malvernair.co.nz

• Certifying Gasfitters • Certifying Plumbers • Heat Pumps • Log Burners • Solar • Electrical Service Technician New Builds • System Design • Vehicles

Visit: www.selwyngasfitters.co.nz for a full list of services

Phone 03 420 1020 • 021 732 331

UPHOLSTERER Recover: Lounge Suites Dining Chairs Squabs etc Free Quotes Based in Weedons Phone: 03 980 4979

Maintenance Renovations & new builds Pump servicing and installation Water filter installation Water pump hire Supply and installation of septic tank systems • Gas and wood fire installation • IQP in backflow prevention • Teatsprayer servicing

NEXT ISSUE: Friday

• • • • • •

0800 752 400

plainspgd@gmail.com

DARFIELD BASED

1st July 2022 —————— DEADLINES:

1pm Monday for Editorial & 10am Tuesday Advertising

Wife: Are you having another sleepless night?!?

Husband: Yeah! I’m so darn angry, I’ve got insomnia again.

Wife: Well what’s keeping you up tonight?

Husband: It's that damn boss of mine!

He gets me so boiling mad! He keeps bugging me all day long... Hounding me and hounding me!!

Then, when comes Ɵme to go to bed, I’m so full of “I should’ve said ….!” that I can’t get any shut-eye!

Wife: What’s he got against you anyway?

Husband: He says I keep falling asleep on the job.