Inspire

INSPIRE Englands most inspirational womens magazine October 2015

CHANEL: INSIDE THE MADEMOISELLE PRIVE EXIBITION TOP 10 SPOOKY SEX STORIES SUBMITTED

BY YOU! OUR FRIGHTFUL MAKE-UP IDEAS WILL LEAVE YOU BREATHLESS! H&M X BALMAIN: THE NEW COLLECTION WHY NOW IS THE TIME TO VISIT CUBA! THE BEST OF INSTAGRAM BEAUTY

£3.50

FREE MAKEUP GIFT!

THE TREEHOUSE TREND! PLUS THE LATEST BOYFRIEND CRAZE!

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INSPIRE Contents

Fashion & Beauty

Sex & Relationships

Pg 2 - Insta-glam!

Pg 6-7 - Winter Boyfriends!

Pg 11 - H&M Realness!

Pg 18-19 - Spooky Sex Stories!

Pg 12-15 - Chanel!

Pg 22 - Ask Samara!

Follow these 5 Insta-beaut� g�r�s!

Get your sparkle on this winter!

Inside the Mademoiselle Prive fashion show!

Should you get one? Of course!

We publish your 10 creepiest sex stories!

Our columnist helps you out with love and sex!

Pg 17 - Spooky Beaut�!

Lear� to perfect that Halloween look!

Travel & Lifestyle

Also this month...

Pg 3 - Cosy Cor�er!

Pg 23 - Our Reviews!

Pg 5 - Cuba: A Historian’s Playg�ound!

Pg 24 - Horoscopes!

Aut�mn t�ends to enrich any home!

Aut�mn t�ends to enrich any home!

The latest book, movie and concer� reviews!

What do the cosmos hold in store for you?

Pg 9 - Mindf�lness!

Your g�ide to a lighter mind!

Pg 20 - Top 5 Treehouses!

A r�ndown of the most lux�rious t�eehouses!

ADVERT

-Glam

5 beauty and makeup accounts you need to be following

1. Kat Von D (@thekatvond)

The tattoo artist turned makeup guru dedicates much of her Instagram feed to her latest looks and products, all of which can be found at Sephora stores worldwide.

Her bold looks are perfect for anyone looking to try something much more daring with their makeup. Get ready for colourful over-lined lips and the perfect cateye!

2. Patrick Starrr (@patrickstarrr)

This make-up artist’s feed is full to the brim of the best blending you’re ever going to see in your life. This is another daring stylist who will see you on your way to getting that sought after #flawless look.

3. Jess Noor (@jess_mua89) Make-up artist and har stylist Jess Noor’s Instagram feed is overflowing with the best bridal beauty. You’ll be blown away by her talent, and want to book her for your special day too.

4. Em Ford (@mypaleskinblog) Em’s Instagram first gained followers through her YouTube make-up tutorials, but quickly shot to fame through her revelation of having bad acne. Her tutorials on how to cover bad skin makes Em’s feed relatable to anyone.

5. Noelle (@littleteafox)

Noelle’s primary outlet is her YouTube channel of the same name, but her Instagram offers a wealth of gorgeous selfies demonstrating her flawless make-up and ever-changing hair colour.

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Cosy corner.

This months hottest home trends Autumn is officially with us. Days are getting shorter, the leaves have fallen and the chosen drink of choice is red wine. The colder weather not only affects what we choose to wear but also how we decorate our homes. This month’s home trends are grey, warm and cosy. With Moroccan rugs, Mulberry cushions, and vintage turntables we really are embracing the new season. So why not treat yourself to an ottoman, open that bottle of rioja you’ve been saving and beat the winter chills in front of an open log fire.

John Lewis elm kasbar rug £499

John Lewis jug £16

Graham Greene Klein Ottoman £550

Mulberry cushions sold at John Lewis £50 H&M coffee tray £25

KEY FEATURE Elephant interior This month we are loving all things elephant. From the H&M elephant saucer and cup, H&M elephant candle holder. To Selfridges own design and paint your own elephant- with profits going to support vital charity work in saving Asian elephants from poaching and tourism.

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H&M magazine rack £16

H&M matching elephant saucer and cup.

Saucer £4.50 Cup £6

John Lewis turntable £69.99

Zara goblet £29.99

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CUBA: an historians playground Images of cigars, long white sandy beaches, and maturing vintage cars spring to mind when thinking of Cuba. Still a relatively undiscovered country, Cuba is often overlooked by tourists who choose it’s more famous neighbours such as Mexico. With tourism increasing, making it easier to discover this gorgeous time warped country, now is the perfect time to visit Cuba.

The largest island in the Caribbean, Cuba shares a similar weather pattern and stunning coastline as its popular and more favoured neighbour, Mexico. But with United States- Cuban tensions softening, and travel for American citizens becoming more relaxed, Cuba could soon find it’s self-overrun with spring breakers, and familys enjoying the year round sun and enchanting history. Since the Cuban Communist party came into power in 1959, much of the country has been left in a time-warp. A mesmerising open air museum full of delights for the western traveller.

Cuba isn’t just a location for the car enthusiastic and beach bums. No this country has so much to offer its visitors.

Streets of Old Havana

Old Havana, a must-see part of the city, can easily be explored in an afternoon. Or if you’d prefer a more leisurely experience of the old town at a speed allowing you to fully appreciate the many sights and streets full of action, a number of days in the city is plenty of time to sight see at a more enjoyable pace.

Streets are lined with bustling cafés, antique shops, and cigar rolling stalls, there really is no shortage of charming attractions to wonder over whilst roaming the colourful lanes.

When visiting any country, an understanding of the history of that location helps create a deeper connection and appreciation for the place your discovering. So when exploring the cobbled streets of Old Havana be sure to pop into the Museum of the Revolution which details the armed revolution conducted

by Fidel Castro against the US-backed government during the period July 1953- January 1959. Any trip to this enchanting country should include a period spent relaxing on the many beaches. A popular choice for all-inclusive breaks tends to feature along the unspoilt sandy strip that is Varadero to the north

Locals playing in Old Havana

of the country. With crystal clear waters, swaying palm trees and toned young Cubans, this is the location to unwind while adjusting to the vibrancy of life in Cuba. This is the ultimate place to turn your phone off and relax. You could even be excused for comparing your stay in Varadero as paradise. Located in the centre of the country is Santa Clara. This quirky city is notorious for the country’s only official drag show, beauty pageants for transvestites and a popular rock festival.

But a must see sight in this cosmopolitan city is the Museum of Che Guevara dedicated to the life behind the famous revolutionary, entrance This is the place to go for a party. into the museum also includes With rum in abundance, cigars the mausoleum where Che still at the ready, this is the place to lays. When your all exhausted experience the other side of sightseeing and educating yourself on the country’s history, Cuban culture. Be warned this experience doesn’t come cheap, it’s time to let go and party up but it may just be the highlight of at Havana’s top nightclub. Club your trip.

Tropicana is a world known A holiday to Cuba isn’t like cabaret and club originally any other. Expectations are launched in 1939 at Villa Mina. exceeded and Booking in advance is advised memories are made. For the as its popularity is high not just ultimate experience, a more with visiting tourists but locals looking for a good time. Ridiculous personal experience and a sparkling costumes, fast music and feeling of appreciation by locals happy to accept you into their even faster foot work leaves the world. audience open mouthed.

Beach in Varadero

Now really is the time to visit this blessed country, or forever regret.

Return flights from London Gatwick to Havana in November £492, flying with British Airways, and Iberia

BY CHARLOTTE JOHNSON

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LOCK IN THAT BOYFRIEND FOR THE A

h, winter. With November quickly approaching, it seems that the season of snowflakes and hot chocolate is only a stone’s throw away.

Unfortunately, the cold weather means that the population enters hibernation mode, fearing to leave the warmth of their slippers and brave the inevitable avalanche awaiting them the second they step out of the door. Okay, so maybe that one was a little far fetched, but for this time of year in particular, dating can be hard.

It is no secret that we warmblooded animals would much rather spend the bitter and windy days curled up in front of the fireplace watching Love Actually.

Instead of dating, it is far easier to look for a guy you can snuggle with and spend time with, but who isn’t really relationship material in the long term. And just after Halloween is the perfect time to do so! Perhaps we women are more eager to seek out these men at this time of the year, because of the so-called “nesting season”. The easiest way to look at the concept of a winter boyfriend is to think of it being a Summer fling, but without the whole Summer part.

So why do winter relationships seem to be so trendy these days?

Move over winter coats. the winter boyfriend is here.

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Aside from being able to binge on Netflix with someone and fight over who is taking up most of the blanket, there are other reasons people seek out someone special during this time. Simply put, nobody likes to be alone over the holidays. I mean, none of us enjoy constantly hearing cousin

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are also those of us who really like presents. And I mean reeeeeally like them, almost to the point where we have an almost religious kind of obsession with them. I’m not by any means saying that this is a gender specific trait, but I’m sure I’m not the only woman in the world who will admit to worshipping a diamond necklace or a Prada bag.

I’m not afraid to admit to a degree of superficiality. In fact, I embrace it and so should we all. Whether it’s the giving or the receiving of gifts, there’s no denying there’s some kind of thrill regardless of the side you’re on.

As to whether or not you personally should bag yourself a winter boyfriend, why not? It will certainly make the next 4 or 5 months less lonely, particularly considering that Valentine’s Day fits comfortably into the perfect time period to catch yourself one og these guys. If you’re the kind of person who really wants to settle down and have babies straight away, then maybe you should steer clear of the idea of a temporary winter fling. However, for the more practical women out there, take that leap of faith. You never know, it could always turn into

Move over winter coats. The winter boyfriend is here.”

Amanda criticise us over the Christmas turkey because we are coming to the end of yet another year without having settled down (nobody likes you, Amanda). Men are there for us to show off to our friends and family. Contrary to the idea that men are the hunters and women are the gatherers, we are the hunters when it comes to relationships. We take our pick of the men out there and when we feel like we’ve managed to reel in a good one, we go in for the kill, taking him back to our family and introducing him to our parents so that they can see what we’ve caught. There is no better time of the year in which to show off these accessories than during the holiday season.

From a different angle, there

something more. People generally categorise the long and short term potential of relationships too early, whereas if you were to start a casual relationship. then you have no expectations and everything is free to evolve however it naturally will.

The key thing to remember when it comes to dating in general is that everybody feels differently.

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For the practical women out there, take that leap of faith.”

Don’t let somebody tell you how to date anybody else, and don’t feel like you have the right to tell somebody else how to date. We all do it differently, and what feels right to us shouldn’t be belittled or demeaned because somebody else might disagree. Don’t desperately hunt for a winter boyfriend, but if one comes along, remain open minded about it. That snowflake relationship might just be one to tell the future grandhcildren about.

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ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT MINDFULNESS It’s a word we’ve been hearing an awful lot about recently, and like us you may be wondering what is mindfulness? Well let us explain and update you on this latest form of meditation sweeping across the world.

Mindfulness is an ancient Buddhist practice aiming to increase awareness, clarity and acceptance to moments happening in the present.

Your probably thinking why would I need to become more in the moment? How many times have you been somewhere special either enjoying a delicious meal with your partner or out having a few drinks with close friends, and whilst laughing and enjoying yourself you’re already planning what your next going to do, the clothes that need washing when you get home, or if you have enough space for dessert.

Well mindfulness can help you truly live in the moment, taking away the burden of planning and helping you appreciate and hold onto the moments that really do matter.

The NHS are one of many organisations who claim that by paying more attention to not just your feelings but the world around you, you can help improve your own mental health.

So how do you practice mindfulness? Here’s some quick easy steps to practice this technique into your busy lifestyle.

Practicing mindfulness can take place over any activity, whether walking to the tube, cleaning the house or doing the weekly food shopping.

By choosing an activity you can lock into deeper thoughts and rid yourself of negative feelings. Whatever the chosen activity focus on staying in the moment. Take the time to see, hear, smell, feel and breath focusing on every sense. Notice the thoughts which appear in your mind, and then re-focus, banishing those unwanted thoughts by bringing your mind back to the chosen activity. Take time to be patient, and compassionate with yourself, and others as well. By stopping yourself from judging others and seeing things as either good or bad, pleasant or unpleasant, your training your mind and tapping into the fact that everything is as it is, everything flowsnothing is fixed.

A number of famous faces have proclaimed their support towards this easy and effective mediation technique, boosting about the results. These include Harry Potter actress Emma Watson, Davina McCall, even London Mayor Boris Johnson has spoken out about seeking help to include mindfulness into his busy life.

But one celebrity has gone a step further than others, releasing her own guide to mindfulness, this woman is no other than the gorgeous Goldie Hawn.

Hawn has not only set up her own foundation called the Hawn foundation, offering advice to parents and transforming children’s lives through the use of mediation to help improve their education, aggression and stress through emotional learning programmes which all include mindfulness.

One easy activity to include practice mindfulness can be seen as NOW. This involves; Noticingnoticing where your attention lies, what are you thinking about? What’s worrying you? Observewhat am I doing? What am I thinking? Try observing motions within your body, the way you walk and the way you sit. Wise mind- then think to yourself what next?

How shall I continue?

BY CHARLOTTE JOHNSON

Along with setting up an organisation offering help to vulnerable children and allowing them the opportunity to succeed in not just their own happiness but also setting them up for a successful future, Hawn has also released an aspiring book for those wanting to understand more about mindfulness which she fully supports as an necessity for a richer, more understanding view on life. 10 Mindful Minutes published earlier this year is an excellent starting point in discovering alternative practices of this ancient mediation.

But if you’re after a more recent guide to help you understand more about this latest trend, here are three of our top choices to get you going. As part of the new adult collection released by Ladybird are books such as How it works: the husband, and the Ladybird book of the hangover. Part of this new shake up is also the Ladybird book of mindfulness. Along with outlining basic practices within this book, this book is sure to bring a smile to the face of the reader through its silly and light-hearted explanation of the concepts behind the principles. This book is for those wanting a lighter form of reading.

Another suggested reading is Body calm: The powerful meditation technique that helps your body heal and stay healthy.

Written by Sandy Newbigging, this how to guide is written with such clarity and with such an insight that you almost feel guided into releasing all the negativity that disturbs your body, mind and soul.

Included within this book are Sandy’s own CALM techniques which make practicing this mediation even easier than before.

Another top read but one only available one Amazon’s Kindle is, Meditation: The Meditation Beginner’s Bible: How to Relieve Stress, Find Inner Peace and Live Happier by Tai Morello.

This really is the ultimate bible on understanding and practicing this form of mediation, and with only 33 pages this is the bible that can be read again where ever when in need. This bible will take you on an inner journey to a state of peace, joy and happiness.

By taking a small period out of each day to devote to practicing mindfulness you could quickly see a change in the way you view and experience life, and therefore improving your relations within your family, work and relationship with your inner body. There really is no reason not to give this easy mediation a go, there’s nothing to lose. In the words of D.H.Lawrence “the living moment is everything”.

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Get your sparkle on this winter It’s the collection of the year. One of our favourite designers collaborating with our favourite, and affordable high street store. This collection sees Balmain’s typical jewelled, detailed dresses labelled at a more affordable price. Let’s see what all the hypes about.

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We are undoubtedly excited about the upcoming Balmain collection being released at H&M. Launching the 5th November this spacey, futuristic collection featuring heavily jewelled dresses and satin wrapped skirts has been highly anticipated since the preview was launched. With Kendall Jenner and Gigi Hadid as the faces behind this ultimate collaboration of designer meets high street the response of fashion fans has been huge.

Even before the launch of the collection in stores items are already on sell on EBAY at double the retail price. But if you have somehow missed all the excitement that has been trending across the web for the

last couple of months, and are wondering what all the fuss is all about, let us show you some of our favourite pieces from the collection which is sure to leave you grabbing your credit card and counting down the hours till the launch. With the collection ranging from £12 on jewellery to £400 on their encrusted jackets and eye catching dresses. This really is the collection of the year for fashionistas who want to stand out with gold bold neck cuffs and glistening futuristic dresses which are bound to bring envy to those who were unfortunate to miss out.

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Gigi Hadid wearing Balmain at the New York preview show

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1. Beaded velvet dress £349.99 2. Multi strand necklace £59.99 3. Yellow jewelled top £94.99 4. Black jewelled shirt £94.99 5. Jewelled encrusted jacket £380 The collection hits the H&M website and stores the 5th November.

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CHANEL Inside the Mademoiselle Prive exhibition

at The Saatchi Gallery

By Lauren Surrage

This autumn, The Saatchi Gallery in London is opening its doors to one of the most famous fashion houses in the world, presenting a walk through the history and creativity of CHANEL through the years.

Mademoiselle Prive draws parellels between the brands creator, Mademoiselle Gabrielle Chanel, and its current Creative Director and fashion mastermind Karl Lagerfeld, while highlighting what makes this brand the powerhouse it is today.

I went along to this prestigious exhibition to find out what it had to offer...

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F

rom October 13th to November 1st, the Saatchi Gallery is taken over by one of the biggest names in fashion.

CHANEL’s Mademoiselle Prive exhibition is dedicated to the life and work of Mademoiselle Chanel, and the works of her modern day counterpart Karl Lagerfeld. I went along to the exhibition as a huge CHANEL fan and was not left disappointed.

Taking up all three floors of the prestigious London gallery, Mademoiselle Prive is big on audience interaction.

The app accompanying the exhibition lets visitors

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fashion show. The gowns, worn by celebrities such as Julianne Moore and Kristen Stewart, are beatifully accompanied by a collection of diamond jewellery. The become truly immersed, with collection - ‘Bijoux special surprises and Easter de Diamants - is Eggs in store for all. the only one Not focused especially around designed by historical detail, Mademoiselle Mademoiselle Prive focuses heavily on CHANEL Chanel, but as a brand. From the black-andhave been whie decor adorning the hallways, to the room dedicated to the ‘totems’ of Chanel, this is truly more of an homage to CHANEL the brand rather than Chanel the designer.

On the upper floors, a room dedicated to the stunning collection of black and gold gowns designed by the brand’s Creative Director Karl Lagerfeld, all of which feaured in this year’s Fall

brought to life and displayed for the very first time since their conception in the early 1930s.

Mademoiselle Prive manages to capture CHANEL’s historic class and timelessness, while also successfully lending itself to the modern advances since Mademoiselle Chanel’s time via the app developed especially to accompany the exhibition.

It is, in a word, exquisite. A fine homage to what is arguably the most powerful and influential fashion house the world has ever seen.

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Spooky Beauty

While the novelty of dressing up is lost on some as they get older, others embrace the Halloween spirit and carry on the tradition of getting spooky for one night of the year, just in a slightly different way than they used to.

At Halloween, we can choose to go one of two ways. One way is to go the traditional, guts and gore route and dress top to toe in prosthetics, complete with roughly a gallon of fake blood.

Or, we can elect to go the way of spooky chic. A method Morticia Addams herself would be proud of.

This can mean sultry smokey eyes, blood red lips, and flawless skin. It can also mean decorative face paint of Sugar Skulls Ă la Day of the Dead, or getting creative and fashioning yourself into something more sinsiter but flawless nonetheless.

Whether you’re a fan of a more traditional Halloween get-up or you always try to do something more creative and different, we think that this holiday is the best opportunity to show off your skills and make the most of the spooky season.

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TOP10 Spooky

SEX

Stories

Our Top 10 for October features a countdown of some of the spookiest, creepiest, and weirdest bedroom blunders! You’ve been blowing up our Twitter all month, and here are some of your best stories.

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INTRUDER ALERT!

FOUR’S A CROWD!

HANDBRAKE MISHAP!

HAUNTED FELLATIO!

SURPRISE!

“While I was having sex, I thought I heard somebody trying to break into the house.

My first thought was ‘I’m not dying naked’ and I ran straight to the bathroom to find my dressing gown.

Funnily enough it turned out to be our cat coming through the catflap.”

“Recently I had a threesome with my boyfriend and a mutual friend. Well, a foursome if you count the snake.

Now the snake was not invited to join us, and just to clarify, nothing sexual happened with the snake. It was just watching us from its cage, scrutinising our movements.”

“Me and my high school boyfriend were sat in his car at the end of the street ‘canoodling’. He had accidentally left the handbrake off, and next thing I know the car is rolling backwards and ended up in a roadside hedge. That was the closest that boyfriend came to a bush.”

“The first time I had a sexual experience was in a haunted house.

I had absolutely no idea what I was doing, and so I relied entirely on a description of fellatio tips that I had read about online. My technique was made all the worse when a poltergeist swung down from the ceiling at us.”

“When I was dating my last boyfriend, he took me back to his place. Both of his housemates are in the restaurant business.

He assumed they were working that night, and they assumed he was out for the night. What actually happened is we ruined a surprise birthday party as 20 guests jumped out from behind furniture.”

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UNWELCOME VISITOR!

BUT FUN?

FREDDY KRUEGER!

BLOODY MARY!

“We’ve all been there, scared to death that our parents or housemates will walk in on us doing the deed.

This fear all too quickly became a reality for me. Long story short: High school boyfriend.

Parents supposedly on holiday. Parents not in fact on holiday. Jump to my mother walking in on me with my legs in the air.”

“Me and my boyfriend were interested in trying something different in the bedroom and settled on anal beads. We were both new to the experience and he wasn’t aware that he needed to pull them out gently. I’m not sure whether he thought he was trying to jumpstart a lawnmower or something, but I screamed. A lot.”

“I will start off by apologising for this story. I was seeing a guy who was suffering from some kind of sexual dysfuction. As a result, we relied on foreplay as the main means of pleasure for most of the relationship. However, he never cut his nails.

Ever. It felt like I was being stabbed.”

“Now I am a huge fan of foreplay (as most of us women are). However, while my ex boyfriend was ‘performing down there’ shall we say, he spontaneously got a nose bleed, and the next thing I know I am covered in blood, Carrie style. I’ve gone off foreplay a little since that time.”

SMOTHER ME GENTLY! “My ex once said to me that if he looked into my eyes, he would ‘finish’ too quickly, and so his solution was to smother my face with a pillow during sex. I pushed the pillow off of me with a little too much force, and he ended up falling off the bed himself. We spent the rest of the night in hospital getting him stitches after he hit his head on my table.”

Follow us on Twitter and tweet @InspireMagazine with your ideas for future Top 10 pages, and you might just see your story up here in the future!

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TOP 5: TREEHOUSES As you know, luxury treehouses are all the range this year, and what better way to spend the chiller evenings, and shorter hours than in your own private rooms nestled high above the trees.

We take a look at our five top treehouses suitable for either a short weekend break, or for a longer week’s relaxation. And trust us, they’re going to get you wanting to get booking.

1. Treehotel, Sweden

Built by Sweden’s finest architects, this Treehotel gives a new futuristic twist on the traditional humble treehouse. With six rooms to choose from, you can either choose to stay in the Mirror cube, UFO inspired, or even the bird nest. Oh and there’s even a sauna suspended from the trees.

2. Milandes Treehouse, France

This castle in the trees is sure to leave you feeling like royalty. located in an oak grove, and boasting a nearby moat, Milandes Treehouse has been built in the style of a traditional French Chateaux. If this wasn’t enough to get you urging to go, maybe the Jacuzzi on the balcony may tempt you. There really is no better place to unwind and relax.

3. Treehouse Gabrielle d’Estrees, France

Milandes Treehouse, France

Another favourite of ours is the Treehouse Gabrielle d’Estrees. Built on a 150 year old oak tree, staying at this treehouse is like stepping back to simpler times. With no electricity in the treehouse evenings are spent around flickering candles, and mornings watching the sun rise from the hammock on the terrace. To top it all off a breakfast basket is delivered each morning at the bottom of the tree.

4. Garden Village, Slovenia

There’s now an even better reason to visit Slovenia. Garden Village located close to the shores of Lake Bled contains six treehouses hiding in the woods, all connected by wooden platforms and suspension bridges. Romantic escapes don’t come much better than this.

5. Chewton Glen, England

If you’re after a bit of luxury closer to home, then look no further than the Chewton Glen in the New Forest. Four glamourous treehouse cabins are nestled into a quiet and secluded valley. Golf buggies transport you to and from the main hotel, and with spa treatments available, and gourmet hampers delivered directly to your room, this really is an ideal place to unwind this autumn.

Garden Village, Slovenia

So whether you’re after a pampered spa weekend away or a relaxing week in a tranquil forest far from civilisation, these top treehouses offer a exciting range of opportunities. Don’t miss out and forever regret, get booking now!

BY CHARLOTTE JOHNSON

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Chewton Glen, England

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Ask Samara

Samara provides the answers you just can’t find anywhere else. No shame. No beating around the bush. Just a quick wit and years of experience.

Doctor Samara Jones is a 31 year old self-proclaimed “sexpert”. Working as a sex and relationship therapist for over 7 years, and being married for 4, her professional and personal expertise ranges from relationship struggles to concerns under the sheets, and everything in between. She addresses your concerns and answers your questions.

Q

I found out today that my boyfriend of 8 months has been using Viagra since we met. I feel a little betrayed, and my confidence has really taken a knock. I love him with all my heart, and even though he said it has nothing to do with how much he desires me, it has affected my ego. How do I bring up how uncomfortable I am without risking our relationship?

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The first thing you need to do in this situation is to remove your ego from it. The purpose of viagra is to maintain an erection, and so in order for it to work your partner must be attracted to you in the first place. Without this arousal, an overdose of viagra couldn’t cause somebody to get an erection. If you still feel concerned, you can always ask whether he has used viagra with previous partners, because you’ll find his answer will probably be yes, and that him taking viagra is not a result of your appearance.

There are a number of reasons as to why he may be experiencing erectile problems: diabetes, low testosterone, even some drugs. Maybe you should talk to him and explore why he takes viagra.

At best, it will eleviate your concerns, and at the very least he will appreciate your support.

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Q

I’m 18 and I’ve been in a relationship with an older guy for just under 2 years now. The issue is that lately I’ve found out that he’s been talking to other girls while we’ve been together. I’ve asked him about it and he dismissed it as harmless flirting, but he has started acting more distant around me since then. He was dating somebody else when we first got together, and I am becoming concerned that he might be cheating on me as well. I love him and he knows he has me. Please help! How do I confront him about my fears?

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Here’s the deal. You chose to be with somebody who you knew was a cheater. If he has cheated before, what’s to stop him from cheating again? The big issue here is, as you said yourself, he knows he has you.

This can be damaging to a relationship as he believes that he can get away with anything, and you will still stay by his side. You need to make a dramatic change in yourself, and go from loving him no matter what, to loving yourself. Once you start to love and respect yourself, you will start to expect that from him, and you will be far less inclined to put up with his flirting. You need to understand that there’s a very real possibility that he is cheating on you, and in order to confront him about it you need to prepare yourself for this outcome. You’re 18, and there’s no need for you to put yourself out there for somebody who isn’t going to appreciate you.

Q

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 4 years, and when we first met we didn’t have sex until 8 months into the relationship. After that we started having sex maybe once a week at

most, and in the past couple of years that number has gotten lower and lower. Now we only have sex maybe once every 2 months, and when we do, he doesn’t last very long. I’m worried that he might be becoming bored with our sex life, but he isn’t open to experimenting at all. Why does he have such a low sex drive?

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Firstly, as you probably know, sex tends to become more and more infrequent the longer you are in a relationship.

You mentioned that you didn’t have sex with him until 8 months into your relationship? Perhaps the reason you’re concerned is because sex has become even more infrequent since then. There are a number of reasons why a man might have a low sex drive.

A fear of intimacy can actually cause a man to avoid sex, as sex equates to closeness and avoiding sex keeps him at a safe distance. Another possibility is that he is embarrassed at his sexual dysfunction. You mentioned that he ejaculates quickly? He could be avoiding sex because he feels ashamed and simply doesn’t want to let you down. Speak to him and try to understand the reasons behind his lack of sex drive. He loves you, I’m sure, and you showing an interest will definitely help him to come to terms with whatever the problem is.

For relationship struggles or sexual queries, Samara can help.

Email her at samarajones@gmail.com with your queries, and she will do her best answer them.

REVIEW CORNER Join Charlotte Johnson as she looks at this month’s must read and the year’s most highly anticipated cinema release.

Cinema movie of the month Spectre Spectre? Nothing spectacular

All die-hard fans will be pleased to hear that Bond is finally back in the highly anticipated Spectre.

Our favourite Bond is back, yes Daniel Craig returns to our screens in the highly anticipated Spectre, the 24th film in the Bond franchise. So was the wait worth it?

Well die hard Bond fans will lap up the typical antics of 007, where those expecting something a bit more original are bound to be disappointed with the ‘samey’ feeling. The movies begins in Mexico City during the day of the dead, Craig straight away jumps into character with the most the ridiculous scenario where Bond hijacks a helicopter completing multiple loop-the-loops in the air after associating a secret gang member and his pilot, all before flying off into the sunset.

Then as quickly as all the action began we’re back in London watching Bond being told off for his inappropriate actions, as if he’ll ever learn!

The movie takes us to Rome, Tangier and Austria chasing the illusive Spectre- a world surveillance service intent on reducing civilians privacy and

changing life as we know it. No bond film would be without the ladies of course. There’s a brief camo starred by Monica Bellucci which lasts no longer than three I minutes, but its actress Lea Seydoux playing a Madeleine Swann which is the flavour of the month. A doctor and daughter of a former member of Spectre, Swann tags along for the ride jeopardising not just her health but that of Bond’s for some reason I never quite understood.

Predictable!

This movie lives up to the typical Bond film; high speed chases, exotic locations, cars and ridicules fight scenes. But what this film was lacking was a sense of originality, the ending was highly predictable and easily anticipated even at the beginning of the movie, which in my opinion was far too long.

What was unexpected was a sultry Bond speeding off into the darkness with his new lady leaving the world of 007 behind. but what we do know is this wont be the end of James Bond, maybe of Daniel Craig playing this historic character especially after being quoted in an interview as saying “I’d rather break this glass and slash my wrists” when asked if he would be returning as Bond in the next movie. All I can say is I’m routing for Idris Elba as the future Bond to help mix up the ‘samey’ effective transparent across recent films, but don’t get me wrong I thoroughly enjoyed Spectre and highly recommend if you haven’t seen it already to go watch it. Its fast, action packed and quick moving story line featuring faces from the past sums up Bond in a nut shell.

Book of the month- List of the lost by Morrissey A little lost, and a loss of my time Morrissey. Even thinking of this oozy heartthrob conjurers up images of screaming fans and smoky venues with hits of The Smiths playing passionately in the background. For the thousands of Morrissey and Smiths fans around the world, the news of a new book released by this singer turned author was sure to get their hearts pumping and leave them running down to their local bookstore. How disappointment soon kicks in.

List of the lost released in September is a dramatic drop in quality to his previous hit Autobiography. You may be wondering why it has taken so long for us to write a review for this book, well the answer was we were not planning to, but as true Morrissey fans we felt it was in our duty to report our findings to fellow devotes.

Set in suburban Boston in 1970’s the story follows a teenage half-mile relay team, the tale covers male friendships, rivalry and sacrifice. American politics, culture, murder and of course, sex are all highlighted, however only briefly and saying nothing comprehensible about them.

Reading this 122 page novel was slow and painful considering its size. Unfocused and incoherent ramblings of a man’s obsessions and bugbears, this novel without doubt would have never reached publication without the famous author.

What’s more frustrating about this whole experience, is how much of the story is written in pure gibberish, “In servitude is the watcher, asking of the do-er that he assumes all aspects of the watcher’s desire.”

After a long and painful month of persistence the end has finally come, but before crawling into a dark room to weep and question my time wasted I shall instead play some Smith’s hits and try to regain my faith in my once idol. No devoted fan however obsessed could love this book, so we beg fans out there, if your browsing the shelves of your local WHSmith’s, and see the List of the lost reduced don’t think why not. Put it down and walk away.

List of the lost by Morrissey.

WHSmith RRP £7.99

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Sagittarius

November 22 - December 21

You may believe that displaying your feelings is a sign of weakness, but over the next two or three weeks, you will find yourself becoming frustrated with you not allowing yourself to express how you truly feel.

Even when you don’t show it, your true feelings are there under the surface, and unless you allow them to come up for air every now and then, that frustration will crush you. Don’t be concerned about how people might react to this new side of you. While their initial reaction will be shock, they will quickly come around once they see how much happier and free you have become. However, be wary of being too abrupt. You need to give people the time to come to terms with your newfound confidence in expressing yourself, and if you act too rashly, you will find yourself doing more harm than good. Your partner will appreciate this side to you more than anybody else, and it will only serve to enhance their love for you. They are getting to see the person you truly are, and that will pull the two of you closer.

Capricorn

December 22 - January 19

Your bodily insecurities have recently inhibited you in your relationship. However, you are approaching a turning point. You will realise that you have nothing to be ashamed of, and that newfound confidence propels you into exploring the sexual fantasies you have been keeping to yourself. Use this opportunity to really take control in bed.

Aquarius

January 20 - February 18

It is time for you to focus on yourself. A promotion or newfound love will cause your ego to skyrocket, but it’s important that you keep yourself grounded. Remember who you are, and don’t let others try to bend you to their way of thinking.

Don’t be afraid to take breaks when you are at risk of overworking yourself.

Pisces

February 19 - March 20

You are at risk of being thrown into a situation that you will struggle to come out of. You need to keep your passion under control, otherwise you will find yourself drowning under the pressure of people’s expectations of you. However, you’ll find you come out of this situation stronger, realising the importance of your family ties.

Horoscopes November

What do the cosmos have in store for you next month? Busty Betty brings you your future from beyond the stars.

Aries

March 21 - April 19

People have been incredibly supportive of your decisions lately, much to your surprise. Perhaps you’ve taken a new job, or embarked on a new relationship, and you expected a negative reaction from your friends and family? Remember that support when a close friendship might be starting to crumble.

You need them in your life.

Taurus

April 20 - May 20

You may be coming to blows with people who misinterpreted the aim of a work project. It’s not that they are intentionally doing a bad job, they simply misunderstood. Clear up this misunderstanding in the next couple of days, and you’ll be amazed at how much weight is lifted off your shoulders. It’s far better to be safe than sorry.

Gemini

May 21 - June 20

You are struggling to balance prospects at work and the relationship with your friends and family. It’s all well and good to be career focused, but the challenges you are undertaking are in fact driving you further and further apart from your loved ones. You need to decide whether this new opportunity is worth the distance you are creating.

Cancer

June 21 - July 22

You are surrounded by people from all directions trying to bring negativity into your life. Perhaps you need to take a break and get away for a week or so. Clearing your mind will allow your energies to reassert themselves, and will leave you feeling incredibly refreshed. If all else fails, you need to consider letting go of those who aren’t really ‘friends’.

Leo

July 23 - August 22

Over the next couple of weeks, you will need to make some hard decisions, and will be forced to take a side between bickering factions. Although you may feel inclined to take the side of your closest friends, don’t act rashly because that might not be the best route. Trust your instincts, because they will lead you down the right road.

Virgo

August 23 - September 22

Have you found yourself becoming controlling lately when it comes to relationships? You need to relax. They are not going anywhere, and your paranoia is stopping you from seeing this. Clear the air, and explain to your partner how you are feeling, and you’ll find that they can easily qualm all of your fears.

Libra

September 23 - October 22

Don’t let your emotions get the better of you in the next couple of weeks. You will be faced with challenges that emotionally push you to the limit, but if you can harness these emotions there is nothing that you won’t be able to do. It is easy for you to be at your best, you just need to keep everything in check.

Scorpio

October 23 - November 21

The next few weeks are YOUR weeks, Scorpios. You’ll be constantly telling everybody about how good you feel, and your positive outlook will enable you to complete tasks you thought you would never be able to do. Allow yourself to bask in this confidence, and you’ll find that you are inspiring everbody around you.

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