Return To Normal

RETURNING TO NORMAL

By: Vivian Evans, Canada

As the world roared to a screeching halt in 2020 many of us found ourselves unexpectedly on hold. The normal that we knew as a collective began to slip away, and the fast-paced life that many of us came to know and love, stopped. Time became abundant and, in this pause, we started to notice what was all around us. For some, the things we strived for or filled our schedule with, were no longer important. Others were left wondering what was really important.

Then there were others still who knew in their hearts that this was the time to retreat deeper into their roots. I found myself immersed in a herd of horses listening to the sweet whispers as they shared deep seated knowledge on how this is an evolutionary time. In past years humanity may have felt a sense of distant individuality. Our connection to community began it’s uncovering. Returning to really appreciating the simple joys, and those joys are what we are all made of.

GROWING & GLOWING

Spring. It is a beautiful transitional time. As soon as you step into the presence of the herd you can sense a lightness. It is comfort when the earth begins to glow, simulating a reflection to all of new growth. The horses begin to indulge in their spring rituals basking deeply on the warming bed of earth blanketed by the sun. I enjoyed this time as often as I could and would curl up on the ground with them. Feeling the sun on my face,

placing a hand on their shoulder, absorbing the heat and softness of their coat. The sound of deep breathing or sometimes, quiet horse chattering in sweet dreams, filled the air. I was lulled into an overall sense of well being, supported by the earth, safely connected to nature, to all. I watched trees sway with the whisper of a breeze that has circulated the earth millions of times. I was home. This is what home feels like.

It is not unusual to find me seeking counsel from the horses, listening to their every whisper and observing every movement. I found myself with the herd more and more this year, craving the quiet stillness that sprawled across 150 acres of forest, fields and creek that this herd calls home. Ten horses make up the herd. Each one’s personality so uniquely different and in their own individuality they create a container with an abundance of wisdom to share. Frequenting the herd, I notice in the collective messaging a theme. I have learned to trust my intuition and listen to that quiet voice within. This spring, as I tried my hardest to receive some important insight, I kept receiving from each of them, ‘nothing here has changed’. A seemingly simple observation and insight that left me a bit perplexed, became a bigger revelation. As the horses often do, they held onto those deeper messages like a secret only released when ready to be revealed. Sometimes it was as though they looked directly through me knowing that what I was to learn was already within. A shiver of a feeling arose. The horses wanted to show the way to return to normal, and this wasn’t about the physical world.

NAVIGATING NEW CONNECTION

In the city I would catch waves of people wishing things could go back to normal. On the news they talked of what is the new normal. Uncertainty and stress fueled the air, resistance anxiety, is this what we will be forever? A desire to want to escape, to run, but not knowing what direction to go or what exactly was the threat. The event of a pandemic brought us together and apart. Collectively an awakening began. The knowledge that we are all connected began to spread. Impermanence is rattling to the core, and awareness began to emerge. This new world we were coming to now was one that we must become accustomed to. I decided to take a different perspective, that of a horse. What if I looked beyond the boundaries of the external human experience? Within, there is one thing that we all are longing for, meaningful connection.

APPRECIATING SIMPLICITY

The herd continued to flourish. Spring fully sprung to life and the pure joy and happiness that filled the air was contagious. I was being guided to learn more. My pressing question; how do I navigate the world, as it is so different now? A teaching I would learn had nothing to do with the outer world, but everything to do with my own inner world. Part of me wished I could become part of nature on these days. Just disappear into her. The other

part knew disappearing wasn’t possible. So, alongside the herd I uncovered something more deeply seated, the feeling of where home is, within. We all have access to this space through awareness of our surroundings, appreciating simplicity, gratitude, knowing our individuality and being connected to community. We are all able to take great reverence in the act of simplicity or non-doing in order to uncover a place within that is a stable foundation to grow on. Our truest essence is always there, always accessible.

Dr. Peter Levine calls this the felt sense, “a difficult concept to define with words, as language is a linear process and the felt sense is a non-linear experience. Consequently, dimensions of meaning are lost in the attempt to articulate this experience.”

Throughout the year I continued to walk the forest, rest and meditate with the horses who willingly supported me. I shared these experiences with people who craved the same interdependence and noticed that more and more people who joined us needed the same experience. Client sessions with the horses became about sitting by the creek, walking the forest and allowing the horses who wished, to join us and hold space. It took practice and patience to unearth a feeling of wholeness as a space that we can easily return to again and again, taking into consideration that we all must navigate the world through experiencing different environments. From work, to city, to family, and all of our regular activities, it was the teaching of how to return to that place of peace deep inside that many sought out. Outer influences can overwhelm, but here with the horses we are not influenced by an external environment. Rather we are supported to create, to explore the environment within, the felt sense. We all succumb to moments of anxiety and stressors. The horses are not exempt from this either. Rather it is about how to bring back the balance of the natural elements of the world to embody our physical experience.

The horse is our greatest teacher; patient, kind yet firm, giving those nudges to find the most authentic version of who we really are. The horses remind us to return to simplicity, appreciating the greater world that surrounds us, leading with kindness and most importantly, staying connected to our own roots.

As a great horseman once said, ‘the horse always knows it is right’.

I couldn’t have asked for a better teacher when returning home to the heart alongside the horses. ~*~

“I decided to take a different perspective, that of a horse.”

Vivian Evans

“If you are not strong enough to say it they will say it for you and with a silence that is louder than you have ever heard.”

Jen Kotkin, www.jenkotkinpetcare.com