Remembering Lillian Bouchard.

BY CLARA GUNDERSON

From 1949 to 1957 there was a delightful TV series called “I Remember Mama.” The basis of the series was the Hanson family, immigrants from Norway now living in San Francisco. A black and white show, it touched on the wisdom and common sense of Mama Hanson. It was a heartwarming drama, and we watched it every week to see how Mama’s words rang true, saving her children from temptation and disobedience. Mama always knew best!

Of course, it took me years to realize that truth in my own home. Lillian, my mama, lived life without fanfare, one day at a time. It amazes me that though she lost her mother at age 4 and was raised by a working father and housekeeper, she was such a nurturing person. Softspoken, nurturing, and forgiving are true descriptions of my mama.

Like Mama Hanson, my mother came up with some pretty significant bywords that served her well. Three generations later, she is still quoted. One especially so: “Be a credit,” she would say every time one of us left the house. What did she mean? “You are a Bouchard,” she would answer, “Make us proud!” As I picked up this proverb with my own children, I realized it had a far deeper meaning. The Apostle Paul put it this way: “Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ …” (Philippians 1:27). In other words, Mom was saying, Jesus died for you; don’t let his sacrifice be in vain.

My mom and dad came to the Lord slowly as young parents; they grew into their faith over the years. I remember my mom leading a children’s Sunday school class. I was so proud to see her up front! Her favorite hymn was “Sing Them Over Again to Me, Wonderful Words of Life.” Mom borrowed a slogan from the local electric company that she loved to say to us: “Progress is our most important product.” She’d say this when we were amid a remodel, walls torn down, dust everywhere. She’d remind me of it when I didn’t want to finish my homework or got discouraged with the dress I had started to sew. “Done is better than perfect,” she’d quote. Each step completed was a success. Here in Idaho, as our house was being built, this proverb was quoted often! Solomon, God’s man of wisdom, says, “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might …” (Ecclesiastes 9:10).

I remember my mom’s words when a young girl at church found herself pregnant. The gossip was unkind, unforgiving. Mom said, “I’m not going to say a thing until all of my girls are married.” Maybe she had tasted the bitterness of public criticism herself. Perhaps she had been hurt by another’s cruel words.

She had definitely learned the value of the Golden Rule as we read it in Matthew 7:12, “In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you …” I remember my mom serving us hot tea and something from the oven every night at ten, listening to the news, and going to bed. Oh, and I well remember her humor at the dinner table when she had made a new dish, always very savory. She put us all to shame as she said, “Let’s have whoever made this make it again.” Not one of us had said how delicious it was. Shame on us! Ungrateful, we presumed on her goodness.

I remember coming home from school and seeing my mom sitting on the couch, one leg tucked under, reading—her favorite downtime. It may have been a book of poems, a novel, or her Bible. Marrying young and having her children by the time she was 26, she gained knowledge from reading. Vicariously, she traveled as we, her children, did in reality.

I remember my mom years later, after suffering a stroke, wheelchair-bound, unable to express herself, yet smiling at me in her love. Toward the end of the day when Dad was expected home, she would wheel herself over to the big picture window in the living room, eyes sparkling as she saw his truck pull into the driveway. “She watches over the activities of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and bless her; her husband also, and he praises her saying: Many daughters have done nobly, but you exceed them all” (Proverbs 31:27–29).

My mom lived her own advice, living her life worthy of the gospel.

Gunderson lives in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho. Photo: The author’s mother and sister, 1948.