Choosing to Be a Medium, by Sharon Farber

Choosing betoa

medium

About the Author Sharon Farber is a massage therapist, healer, award-winning artist, medium, teacher, and the owner of Dragonfly Healing Arts in Pine Meadow, CT. She gives mediumship readings and demonstrations, facilitates a mediumship development circle, teaches mediumship classes, and leads mediumship development retreats. Learn more about the author at www.sharonfarber.net.

Llewellyn Publications Woodbury, Minnesota

Choosing to Be a Medium: Experience & Share the Healing Wonder of Spirit Communication © 2019 by Sharon Farber. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever, including internet usage, without written permission from Llewellyn Publications, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

First Edition First Printing, 2019 Book design by Samantha Penn Cover design by Shira Atakpu Project management by Samantha Lu Sherratt Editing by Rosie Wallner Llewellyn Publications is a registered trademark of Llewellyn Worldwide Ltd. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Names: Farber, Sharon, author.

Title: Choosing to be a medium : experience & share the healing wonder of spirit communication / Sharon Farber.

Description: First Edition. | Woodbury : Llewellyn Worldwide, Ltd., 2019. | Includes bibliographical references.

Identifiers: LCCN 2018053961 (print) | LCCN 2019000853 (ebook) | ISBN 9780738757735 (ebook) | ISBN 9780738757483 (alk. paper) Subjects: LCSH: Mediums. | Spiritualism.

Classification: LCC BF1286 (ebook) | LCC BF1286 .F37 2019 (print) | DDC 133.9/1--dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2018053961 Llewellyn Worldwide Ltd. does not participate in, endorse, or have any authority or responsibility concerning private business transactions between our authors and the public.

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Llewellyn Publications A Division of Llewellyn Worldwide Ltd. 2143 Wooddale Drive Woodbury, MN 55125-2989 www.llewellyn.com Printed in the United States of America

Forthcoming Books by Sharon Farber Choosing to Be a Medium Companion Journal

Dedicated to my mom and dad

Contents Exercises............................................................................................xv Disclaimer....................................................................................... xix Acknowledgments............................................................................ xxi Author’s Note................................................................................. xxiii Introduction........................................................................................ 1

Part I: Groundwork Chapter 1: My Journey....................................................................... 7 How I Became a Medium / 9 Spirit Contact from a Friend / 11 My Training / 13 Going Pro / 14 Chapter 2: Mediumship.................................................................... 19 Types of Mediumship: Mental, Trance, and Physical / 22 What Is a Born Medium? / 23 Spiritualism / 25 Intuition / 27 Chapter 3: Spirits.............................................................................. 33 There Are No Evil Spirits / 34 Earthbound Spirits, Attachments, and Ghosts / 34 Spirit Guides / 40

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Contents

Part II: Diving In Chapter 4: Beginning Your Adventure in Mediumship...................... 49 Know That It Is Real / 49 Addressing Your Fears / 50 Finding the Right Teacher / 54 Chapter 5: Going Within................................................................... 57 Meditation / 58 Breathwork / 60 Sitting in the Power / 62 Sitting for Trance / 65 Chapter 6: Getting Ready.................................................................. 69 Preparing Your Surroundings / 69 Preparing Yourself / 70 Establishing a Ritual / 71 Smudging with Sage / 72 Grounding / 74 Raising Your Vibration / 78 Setting Your Intention / 84 The Power of Love / 85 Chapter 7: Communicating with Spirit.............................................. 87 The Clairs / 87 Symbols / 95 Spirit Art / 97 Evidence: Validating the Identity of the Spirit Person / 100 Messages from Spirit People / 105 Chapter 8: Being a Medium............................................................ 109 Your First Connections / 109 Turning It Off / 112 Self-care and Protection / 116 Developing Your Own Style / 119 Ethics and Responsibility / 120 Coming Out / 124 Chapter 9: Circle............................................................................. 127 Starting a Circle / 128 Exercises for Circle / 130 Anecdotes from Circle / 136

Contents

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Part III: Advanced Mediumship Chapter 10: The Professional Medium............................................ 143 Charging Money / 143 Educating Your Sitter / 148 Private Readings / 150 Recording Readings / 153 Public Demonstration / 155 Chapter 11: Overcoming Challenges............................................... 163 Unexpected Guests / 163 Dead or Alive? / 165 How Soon Is Too Soon? / 170 Sensitivity / 172 Split Links / 173 Suicides / 176 Loss of a Child / 177 Unborn Children / 179 When the Reading Doesn’t Work / 181 Skeptics / 186 Conclusion...................................................................................... 189

Appendix A: Ten Mediums, Ten Questions..................................... 191 Appendix B: Spiritualist Organizations and Principles.................. 215 Appendix C: Spiritual Healing Mediums........................................ 219 Glossary.......................................................................................... 221 Cited References............................................................................. 227 Additional Resources...................................................................... 229

Exercises Exercise 1: Telepathy / 16 Exercise 2: Strengthening Intuition / 28 Exercise 3: Making Intuition Instinctive / 28 Exercise 4: Using Intuition / 29 Exercise 5: Wonder about Everything / 29 Exercise 6: Who’s Calling? / 29 Exercise 7: What Time Is It? / 30 Exercise 8: Perceiving Pictures / 30 Exercise 9: Sensing Color / 30 Exercise 10: Psychometry / 31 Exercise 11: Psychic Shower / 37 Exercise 12: Waterfall of Light Meditation / 37 Exercise 13: Connect with a Spirit Guide Meditation / 44 Exercise 14: Examining Your Fears / 54 Exercise 15: A Simple Meditation / 59 Exercise 16: A Simple Breathing Exercise / 60 Exercise 17: Alternate Nostril Breathing (simplified) / 61 Exercise 18: Breath Counting / 62

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Exercises

Exercise 19: Sitting in the Power / 63 Exercise 20: Sitting in the Power (simplified) / 64 Exercise 21: Sitting for Trance (suitable for beginners) / 67 Exercise 22: Smudging with Sage / 73 Exercise 23: Grounding with Roots / 77 Exercise 24: Affirmations / 81 Exercise 25: Gratitude List / 82 Exercise 26: Being Quiet in Nature / 83 Exercise 27: Walking Meditation / 84 Exercise 28: Setting Your Intention / 85 Exercise 29: Envisioning Love / 86 Exercise 30: Opening Your Third Eye / 89 Exercise 31: Visualizing / 89 Exercise 32: Hearing / 91 Exercise 33: Listening to (Actual) Music / 91 Exercise 34: Feeling Physical Sensations / 92 Exercise 35: Feeling Emotions / 93 Exercise 36: Smelling / 94 Exercise 37: Using All the Senses / 94 Exercise 38: Working with Symbols / 96 Exercise 39: Creating a Symbol Dictionary / 97 Exercise 40: Psychic Doodling / 99 Exercise 41: Practicing with Evidence / 104 Exercise 42: Three Ways to Link with Spirit / 111 Exercise 43: “Fake it till you make it.� / 111

Exercises

Exercise 44: Clearing and Strengthening Chakras and Aura / 114 Exercise 45: Protective Bubble / 118 Exercise 46: Sitting in Circle: The Basics / 130 Exercise 47: Sitting in Circle: More Structured / 131 Exercise 48: Multiple Links / 131 Exercise 49: Three More Ways to Link / 132 Exercise 50: Flowers and Crystals / 132 Exercise 51: Seeking Specific Evidence / 133 Exercise 52: Exchanging Readings / 133 Exercise 53: Drawing What You See / 134 Exercise 54: Reverse Readings / 134 Exercise 55: Getting Psychic Information About Your Sitter Before the Reading / 134 Exercise 56: Giving Readings Blindfolded / 135 Exercise 57: Speed Readings / 135 Exercise 58: Receiving an Object from a Spirit Person / 152 Exercise 59: Getting More Information / 152 Exercise 60: Recording a Reading / 155 Exercise 61: Giving an Indirect Demonstration / 159 Exercise 62: Giving a Direct Demonstration / 160 Exercise 63: Giving a Double-link Demonstration / 160 Exercise 64: Dead or Alive / 169 Exercise 65: Alternating Between Psychic Perception and Mediumship / 169

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Disclaimer Not everybody has the ideal emotional strength and stability to be a medium. Good mental health, including a strong connection to reality, is vital. People with certain types of mental illness, including clinical depression or psychosis, are advised to consult a healthcare provider or spiritual mentor before pursing mediumship development.

Do not engage in mediumship when you’re feeling physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually unhealthy. Do not practice mediumship while depressed, drained, seriously sleep-deprived, or emotionally unstable, nor while drunk or under the influence of mind-altering drugs.

Expressing belief in a supportive and healing afterlife is not to be misconstrued as in any way advocating suicide. Suicide is not a solution to life’s problems. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 in the United States. Outside of the United States, contact the International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP) at https://www.iasp. info/resources/Crisis_Centres/.

Neither the publisher nor the author takes any responsibility for any possible consequences that may result from the reader’s use of content contained in this publication and recommends common sense when contemplating the practices described in this book.

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Acknowledgments Special thanks to my parents, Seymour and Helen Farber, who have always been my champions. Dad, thanks for continuing to help from the other side, particularly for inspiring me to revisit The Seymour Agency.

Thanks to my husband, Jeff, for being my best friend and supporting me on yet another endeavor, and my children for putting up with me while I wrote this book and not minding too much having such a weird mother.

Thank you to Dr. Dorothy Martin-Neville for telling me I could be a medium and Rita Berkowitz for teaching me how. Thanks to Kitty Woud and Eileen Davies for loving support in my mediumship development. Thanks to members of our circle for sitting with me, allowing me to share our stories, and especially to Mary, Marcy, and Becky, for so many years together. Thanks to everyone who has given me the opportunity to spread love and healing to both worlds through readings and demonstrations. Thanks to my students for allowing me to share the wonders of mediumship. Thank you to all my teachers on both sides of the veil, for love, support, and guidance.

Thanks to Julie Lucey, and Gerald and Marion Lichtenstein for proofreading my initial book proposal. Thanks to Noelle Tkacz and Ellie Luisi for being my second (and third) pair of eyes. Thank you to Tina Wainscott, my agent, for taking a chance on me and helping me cope with commas. Thank you to Angela Wix, my editor, for bringing this book to its full potential, and Llewellyn Worldwide for supportively embracing a new author.

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Author’s Note The people, examples, and anecdotes in this book are real and derived from my own experiences. Some identifying information has been changed to protect identity.

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Introduction

I’m not a morning person. I stay up late, sleep in, and am not usually pleasant before 9 a.m. This book emerged near dawn as I tossed in my bed trying to sleep while spirit people poured ideas into my head. It was awfully early, but they were particularly persistent. I finally gave in, got up, and started writing. If they were working so hard to get me to do this, then we would do it together. My spirit guides give new meaning to the phrase “ghost writers.” I started writing notes, made a list of topics, and created an outline. I told no one. This was between me and Spirit.

Several days later, I was taking a mediumship class in New Jersey and exchanging readings with another student. She connected with my mother’s mom and gave evidence to validate her identity. Then the student moved her hand in a writing motion and told me that Grandma was encouraging my writing. My mouth dropped open. I hadn’t told anybody about writing a book. I started the manuscript and within days my deceased grandmother urged me on! It was interesting that Grandma knew what was happening in my life more than my husband and children did. I continued to receive spiritual support and guidance throughout this entire book adventure.

I agreed to write this book because I have a different perspective than many other mediumship authors. Most of them connected spontaneously with spirit people and didn’t have to learn how. I became fascinated with 1

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Introduction

mediumship without seeing spirit people. This book shares how I learned to become a medium and how you can too.

I am a massage therapist, healer, and artist who has chosen (with guidance from Spirit) to become a medium. I have a BA in sociology from the University of Massachusetts where I graduated Phi Beta Kappa and Cum Laude. I spent three years in the social services field before I decided I could be of more help to people with massage and healing.

I’ve thrived as a healer for more than thirty years but found nothing as exciting and fulfilling as communicating with people in spirit. I am passionate about connecting with those who’ve passed, and I am thrilled with the knowledge that there is an afterlife. I’m a natural teacher, so sharing my journey and encouraging likeminded people is an obvious choice. Unlike mediums who’ve been in contact with spirit people since they were toddlers, I’m an authority on becoming a medium, whatever your age.

Choosing to Be a Medium will enlighten those interested in mediumship and empower and transform those seeking to become a medium.

It’s not necessary to decide which type of reader you are. Read, and see where the journey takes you. You don’t need previous experience or encounters with spirit people to develop your own mediumistic abilities.

If the spirit world fascinates you, but you doubt you have the “gift,” I dedicate this book to you. If you’ve already begun your mediumistic journey, may this book ease your fears and bolster your confidence.

This book starts with a clear explanation of what mediumship is and how it works. Then it addresses every facet of spirit communication to help you become a medium or improve your mediumship. It guides you through potential fears and obstacles and teaches you how to quiet your mind, raise your vibration, increase your intuition, set your intention, and connect with spirit people. There’s a constant emphasis on self-care, healthy boundaries, and making this a safe and sacred journey.

The sixty-five exercises include simple, easy-to-follow steps and appear throughout the book. I encourage you to take the time to complete each exercise. In my own journey, I’ve participated in these exercises as a student and teacher. I learned or adapted them from workshops, mentors, and books, and some I believe I’ve invented. Many have been used

Introduction

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for decades or longer. You can do most of the beginning exercises by yourself anytime or anywhere; for the advanced exercises, you’ll need to work with other people. Ideally, practice with those who want to develop their own abilities, but if not, ask a friend or family member to help. Keep a journal to track what you do, the results, and how your results change over time.

I suggest you read the entire book in sequence because the information builds chronologically. After that, use it as a reference to support your development. My hope is that after you’ve read this book, you’ll have a clear understanding of the wonder and healing of mediumship.

Part I

Groundwork

Chapter 1

My Journey

I had a normal childhood in New Jersey. I wasn’t aware of spirit guides and didn’t confuse living people with those in spirit. As far as I know, my parents and ancestors didn’t either. I had no tragic deaths of close loved ones or near-death experiences. I lived with parents who loved each other, stayed together, and weren’t alcoholics, addicts, or abusive.

My unremarkable childhood differs from that of the many mediums who experienced trauma, spirit sightings, a family history of mediumship, or all three.

My stable home life didn’t mean that growing up was easy; I was sensitive, had trouble making friends, and had poor self-esteem. I entered kindergarten at four years old with a late-November birthday.

That was fine academically, but it took years to catch up socially. Overall, it was fine. My parents were loving and supportive, and there were always books. I was the girl who spent hours in the library.

I was raised Jewish. Our family belonged to a “traditional progressive” temple and my parents were very observant. In Hebrew school, the one class I found interesting, even fascinating, was “Judaism and Mysticism,” where we learned about Kabbalah and the “Tree of Life.”

The teacher recommended reading Carlos Castaneda’s books, which 7

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I devoured. This was my first peek at the world of Spirit and it left a strong impression on me. Although Jewish education was tedious, I loved my Jewish summer camp.

I spent summers at the New Jersey “Y” Camps, where life was infinitely better and I was blessed with “camp” friends. My love of nature bloomed there and my first intentional psychic experiences occurred.

My friends and I were about thirteen and did psychic activities in the bunk at night without supervision. The two I remember best were a numbers game and psychic drawing. In the first, we would sit in a circle and have a girl leave while we chose a number between one and one hundred. When she returned, we would send her the number through our minds and she’d be able to “hear” the number. I vividly remember having the correct number pop into my head when it was my turn.

The doodling was even better. A camper and I sat back-to-back on the floor, each with paper and pen, and drew without talking. We couldn’t see each other’s papers. I can still visualize one of the finished products where we’d sketched the same shapes but differing concepts.

I drew an ice cream cone using a circle on top of a triangle. She made a head with a wizard’s hat using the same shapes. There were other drawings that followed the same pattern, with remarkably similar results. I don’t remember how many of us participated in the doodling, or whose idea these “games” were, but they left an impression on me.

I eventually had a best friend outside of camp and made more in high school and college. I traveled across the country after college and ended up in Charlotte, North Carolina as a Medicaid caseworker. Throughout those years, I dabbled with the I Ching: The Book of Changes (a divination tool) and began a long-term but casual relationship with Motherpeace1 tarot cards. When the I Ching told me, “It furthers one to cross the great water,” I moved back east, eventually went to massage school in Connecticut, and started a career as a massage therapist and healer, which I still pursue today.

During this time, I met my now husband, Jeff. I started painting watercolors with our daughter when she was in kindergarten. After a 1. Karen Vogel and Vicki Noble, Motherpeace Round Tarot Deck (U.S. Games Systems, Inc., 1983).

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few years, I became an award-winning artist. When I decided to sell my eighteen-year-old massage practice so I could focus on painting, my friends and family were horrified. They told me how hard it is to make a living as an artist. Jeff told me, “If anyone can do it, you can.”

I was a content wife, mother, massage therapist, healer, and artist with no special psychic abilities or interest in communicating with spirit people.

How I Became a Medium In 2005, a friend asked if I would go with her to see a medium who was giving readings to a small group in Middletown, Connecticut. I’d never been to a medium, had no preconceived ideas, and decided to go.

About ten people attended the session and we all received connections.

She brought through a special friend and a beloved dog for me, with enough information for me to recognize them. I was fascinated.

She accepted my invitation for her to give small group readings at my massage office. As the host, I attended all sessions and was awed by the powerful experiences people had connecting with their loved ones in spirit. We laughed, cried, and healed through this work. She did this regularly for about a year before relocating to another part of the country.

About a year later, while massaging a man who complained of chest pain, I learned he’d lost his ten-year-old son. The boy had been hospitalized for undiagnosed abdominal pain and died in the hospital from a ruptured appendix. No wonder the man had pain where his heart was!

I couldn’t begin to grasp the grief these parents were experiencing and kept thinking how they might benefit by seeing a medium. I imagined how a good medium might be able to connect with their son who’d be able to tell them it wasn’t their fault, he was happy in spirit, and how much he loved them. The parents would still grieve but might gain a measure of closure and peace. I didn’t mention this to the client but became increasingly aware of situations where mediumship might aid in healing. This event occurred before mediumship was as popular as it is now and when there weren’t many mediums in my area. I saw the need for more and thought maybe I could become one.

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I started reading books on mediumship, but all were written by mediums who’d been connecting with spirit people since childhood. Some clearly stated that mediumship wasn’t something that could be learned; you had to be born with the ability. Others were more ambiguous, suggesting anyone can learn to connect with spirit, but if you’re not born that way, you’ll never be very good.

I knew I wanted to be a medium but didn’t know if it was possible.

When I began taking classes, people kept telling me, “I thought you had to be born that way,” and, “I didn’t know you could learn to be a medium.” I didn’t want to waste time and energy if I wasn’t likely to succeed. Nevertheless, I persisted.

I had talked with Dottie (Dr. Dorothy Martin-Neville is a healer, intuitive, and psychotherapist, and was my teacher at the Institute of Healing Arts and Sciences) about my passionate interest in becoming a medium. I told her how almost everybody questioned whether it was possible and no one encouraged me. Dottie said, “If I didn’t think you could do this, I would tell you,” and suggested I get a mentor and immerse myself in the process. I was thrilled.

That evening, just hours after seeing Dottie, I connected with someone’s loved one in spirit for the first time. I was massaging a client and told her about my interest in mediumship. She offered to let me practice on her, told me her friend had passed a few months earlier, and asked if I could try to reach him. I got an “n” name, heart disease, and saw packs of cigarettes and a military uniform. I shared these perceptions and she recognized her brother, not her friend. She validated that her brother’s name had two n’s, he smoked constantly, and he died of heart disease. Most importantly, she had his military uniform and was looking at it just the other day. These fragments of evidence proved I could connect with spirit people. I was literally jumping up and down with excitement; I could do it!

Successfully connecting with a loved one in spirit, intentionally, was an epiphany for me and the beginning of my serious pursuit of mediumship development. I was now ready to invest all my energy in this process. I found schools and teachers, immersed myself, started a mediumship development circle, and followed my dream.

My Journey

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Spirit Contact from a Friend Before I knew Jeff, I met Edward. Ed was the most psychic person I’d ever known and we had an intense passionate relationship. He often knew things and went off to rescue people. Friends didn’t call him; he was just compelled to find them and, when he arrived, they needed him. He sometimes knew about plane crashes and other horrific events before they happened. He didn’t know how to process that knowledge because sometimes he had bad feelings that didn’t come true. Edward never had instruction or support for his psychic abilities, and I wonder how different his life would have been if he had.

Ed was a brilliant, sensitive, creative, moody, recovering alcoholic, musician, and poet. This added drama to my life. He was the epitome of the Tower card for me, which showed up as the culminating card in a tarot reading I did shortly before meeting him. The Tower card represents upheaval, disruption, change, transformation, chaos, and revelation. Ed brought it all. Spending time with him was challenging. He was very good at fixing other’s lives, while unable to heal his own.

Ed taught me about addiction, denial, and other unhealthy patterns.

I looked at difficult parts of my own life, made interesting discoveries, and experienced personal growth and healing. Ed supported me in this process as much as he was able to.

One of the strongest psychic incidents I’ve experienced occurred when Ed and I dreamed together one night, from different locations and without contact. I dreamed I was on top of a building. I was in trouble and shouted Ed’s full name as loud as I could: “EDWARD JAMES SMITH!” The next day, Ed told me he had rescue dreams that night. He saw me on top of a burning building calling out to him. He became an eagle and flew to save me.

Ed helped me discover what I did and didn’t want in a man and eventually I broke up with him, although we remained close friends.

Six years later, Ed took his own life. I felt something was terribly wrong that day but didn’t know what it was until I received the phone call telling me that Ed had hung himself. I was shocked but not surprised.

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Ed’s life was tormented and I could understand why he chose to leave this world.2 I knew very little about mediumship at the time of Ed’s passing and I hoped for a sign from him. I told myself that if my guitar string broke by itself, that would be a message from Ed. It didn’t.

Several years later, I had a dream visitation from Ed, the only experience I’ve had of that nature. True to his character, Ed came to rescue me. I had a temporary but scary medical issue and went to sleep feeling fearful and vulnerable. When Ed showed up in my dream, I was filled with an amazing feeling of love. This love was all-encompassing and made me feel safe again. I knew Edward was with me because I could sense his energy and it felt like he was right there in the room with me. I slept better after that and the following day I was fine.

The next time I heard from Ed was during my first experience with a medium. She said his first name and perceived his sudden, unexpected, and violent death. She acknowledged his moodiness and drinking and gave me a message from him.

Several years later, before enrolling in a mediumship course, I scheduled a reading with the teacher to make sure she was a skilled medium.

She connected with a young man and gave me several vague pieces of information about him. I told her that I might know this person. She was quiet for several moments and then said, “Would you know an Edward?” Edward’s name provided the evidence I needed, and I enrolled in the class. He helped lead me to this path.

Ed has connected with me through at least seven other mediums. He always comes through with love and I can tell that he’s now at peace. My continued contact with Ed gives me the confidence to reassure people that their loved ones who’ve passed through suicide are in a healing spirit world.

2. Although I understood Ed’s thinking, I don’t agree with suicide as a solution to life’s problems. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. They provide 24/7 free and confidential support. There are similar organizations outside of the United States.

My Journey

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My Training Arthur Findlay College (AFC) is where I learned that mediumship can make you sweat. The courses I took were so intensive that they burned calories. The college, run by the Spiritualists’ National Union in Stansted, England, draws students from all over the world.

I discovered AFC while desperately seeking local mediumship classes where I could receive the guidance I longed for. I kept returning to a local site’s promotion for a week-long class at AFC, which I tried to ignore because, being in England, it wasn’t local at all. I had a moment of weakness and read the class description. I didn’t really think I’d go.

Actually, I had several reasons to attend. If I was going to be a medium, I might as well go to the Harvard of mediumship schools, although students affectionately refer to it as Hogwarts. It’s the most well-known and prestigious school of its kind. The quieter thought in the back of my mind was that if I wasn’t meant to be a medium, I would find out there. I wanted to know if I was on the right path, or simply delusional.

My first trip to the college fulfilled all my expectations and more. It felt like going home. I thrived on the support, exercises, and experience of being with a hundred mediums focused on spiritual development.

The spiritual assessment I had from my tutor was one of the highlights of the week. He told me I’d been using my mediumistic abilities my entire life in my creative and healing endeavors, and that I would reach the level of expertise I aspired to. I hadn’t previously received anything even resembling this amount of encouragement.

We spent hours Sitting in the Power (Sitting in the Power is described in detail in Chapter 5: “Going Within”) that week, where our tutor guided us as we attuned to Spirit. During one of these sessions, I felt a pulsing over my third eye. It was so physical and strong that I thought a moth was fluttering on my forehead. This happened again shortly after I returned home, while listening to a meditation CD by the same teacher.

I felt the opening of my third eye and was excited by the sensation.

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I harnessed my newfound confidence and pursued spiritual development with fervor. The doubts had dissipated. I created a mediumship development circle just weeks after returning home, took local mediumship classes, and immersed myself in spirit communication.

I returned to AFC two more times. At these following visits I experienced trance demonstration, trance work, and a physical mediumship séance. During trance class, I watched a student’s face change as he was “overshadowed” by a spirit guide, and observed fascinating physical phenomena at the séance. I found renewed confidence, enhanced skills, and a long-distance mentor.

My focus during my final visit was different from the previous courses.

I’d progressed from needing to learn the mechanics of mediumship, which I was already teaching and writing about, to stepping into my power as a medium and teacher. This course for me was about the power of love, sacred service, and achieving a closer connection to Spirit. I learned to blend further with Divine Spirit, my spiritual teachers and guides, and other people’s deceased loved ones. This trip was another successful quest to gain trust in my abilities.

The numerous classes I attended at local mediumship schools were also important for my development. I’m grateful for the excellent teachers, near and far, that I’ve been blessed with.

Going Pro My journey from fledgling to professional medium took several years.

Decades of working as a massage therapist and energy healer provided me with a good foundation. I worked with human energy fields and spirit guides (a little bit) in massage school and in practice. I already had a massage and healing business, so I didn’t experience the conflict some people do about whether it’s okay to receive money for helping people. I recognized the need for mediums and the healing they provide, learned how to become one, and have strived continuously since then to hone my skills.

Spirit communication is a second language for me, like Spanish, which I speak slowly and awkwardly and understand only some of

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what I hear. My mediumship skills surpass my ability to speak Spanish but will always have room for improvement. My objective is to be as fluent and accurate as possible. Being fluent in a language doesn’t help much if the person you’re attempting to talk to speaks only a little of it or has other trouble communicating. The spirit people I connect with have varying aptitudes to connect with living people, so the success of a reading isn’t all about me but highly influenced by the personalities and receptiveness of the sitters and the spirit people.

I educated myself in mediumship and continue to do so. I gave myself homework of more than a hundred private readings and several group readings, complete with log reports of whom and what I perceived and how much was validated. After that, I offered “not-quite-free” readings.

My sessions improved. I began to consistently contact recognizable loved ones in spirit and observed the healing this brought to my sitters.

Becoming a professional medium was still a challenging choice.

With mediumship, you don’t take a class, get a diploma, and know you’re ready. Some schools and churches offer certificates, but there’s no universal standard. Mediumship development is an ongoing process that has its own momentum and can’t be rushed. It’s like the blossoming of a rose but without a distinct endpoint.

I chose to become a professional medium when it was clear that I was offering a valued service and I felt that compensation was in order.

Giving free readings was an important part of my development, but the “not-quite-free” readings didn’t work out as well. I invested a huge amount of time, energy, and money in mediumship development, and becoming a professional medium was the natural next step. If I was independently wealthy, or my family’s needs were provided for in another way, I may have made a different decision.

Mediumship is a challenging field because you can’t force readings to be perfect and your success is dependent on other influences. You must try to surrender control, and trust Spirit and the process. I’m content with my decision to become a professional medium and I look forward to decades of further development.

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Chapter 1

— Exercise 1 —

Telepathy Telepathy, sometimes called “mind reading,” is the transformation of thoughts or ideas from one person to another using psychic skills rather than physical senses. This is what I described doing as a thirteen-year-old camper, and one of the ways mediums communicate with spirit people. You can do this exercise with a partner or in a group. Don’t try too hard; relax and let the communication flow.

With a partner In this book’s mediumship practices, it’s preferable to work with people you don’t know well. This exercise is different. A strong emotional bond between partners may make this exercise easier.

1. Sit comfortably facing each other in a quiet place without distractions.

2. Relax, clear your mind, and enter a meditative state.

3. Choose who will be sending and who will be receiving.

4. Determine whether to use numbers, colors, or images. If working with numbers, create a range such as one to one hundred.

5. Both of you: Close your eyes or stare into each other’s eyes. (Try both.)

6. Sender: Focus on the number, color, or image, and use your intention to convey it to your partner. Imagine the image as vividly as possible.

7. Receiver: Empty your mind and use your intention to receive the sender’s thoughts.

8. Continue for five minutes or until the receiver feels they’ve received the thought and shares it with the sender. If it isn’t correct, try again.

My Journey

9. Switch who sends and who receives. Try new thoughts and different types of thoughts.

In a group 1. Sit comfortably in a circle.

2. The group decides whether they’re working with numbers, colors, or images.

3. One person leaves the circle and goes where they can’t see or hear the group.

4. The group chooses a number, a color, or an image.

5. The receiver returns to the circle.

6. The group sends the thought to the receiver who “listens” for it.

7. Take turns being the receiver.

8. Try this without telling the receiver whether it will be a number, color, or image.

9. Make your own subtle adjustments to the exercise.

17

Body, Mind & Spirit / Spiritualism

Experience the wonder of spirit communication first hand—even if you don’t think you were born a medium. Sharon Farber shares her amazing story of becoming a medium through study, not birthright, and she reveals how you can become one, too.

© CRAIG NORTON PHOTOGRAPHY

This easy-to-use, empowering book provides everything needed to lay your foundation for connecting with loved ones in spirit. Build your skills through practical techniques and hands-on exercises. Explore the different types of mediumship, what it is and isn’t, and its roots in Spiritualism. Learn how to gather information from those you connect with in spirit and how to overcome common fears and challenges. Featuring insights from Q & A sessions with various mediums, along with many ways to enhance your abilities—including setting intention, raising your vibration, trance work, meditation, and grounding—Choosing to Be a Medium demonstrates that anyone can connect with spirits on the other side.

SHARON FARBER is a massage therapist, healer, artist, medium, teacher, and the owner of Dragonfly Healing Arts in Pine Meadow, Connecticut. She gives mediumship readings and demonstrations, facilitates a mediumship development circle, teaches mediumship classes, and leads mediumship development retreats. Learn more about the author at www.sharonfarber.net.

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