November-December 2016 live magazine

live A Baptist resource for women on a mission November - December, 2016 · $3.50

SHALOM MISSION

The Value of an STM (p6) Helping 889 women learn to read in Rwanda (p3 and 22)

FAITH

Fight your FOMO (p14) Shalom in Singleness (p16)

ACTION

Mark the date: April 2017 Women’s Conference (p23) Biblical Principles for Women in Ministry (p20)

live

Connecting

in this issue columns Global Mission

3 » Women’s Literacy in Rwanda 5 » A Window on Africa 6 » When Passion Grows Stronger Reaching My Nation 8 » Providing Shalom 10 » Widows and Orphans 11 » Lament of a Canadian White Woman Bible Study 12 » Living in Shalom Using My Gifts 20 » Biblical Principles for Women in Ministry Women’s Ministries

22 » 2017 Great Canadian Bible Study 22 » We Remember

features 14 Fight Your FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) Sealing the chinks with faith

16 Shalom in Singleness Singularly His

18 The Art of Listening Well

How do we offer shalom?

live (formerly The Link & Visitor) began as The Canadian Missionary Link (1878) and Baptist Visitor (1890). Published bi-monthly by Canadian Baptist Women of Ontario and Quebec 5 International Blvd., Etobicoke, ON M9W 6H3 416-622-8600 x 304 Fax 416-622-2308 bwoq@baptist.ca www.baptistwomen.com Executive director Diane McBeth

It’s the bane of publishing . . . timely stories often have to wait to be told and heard. We’ll have to wait until the January/February 2017 issue to read the stories and reports coming out of October’s Resetting the Relationship conference and November’s month-long prayer initiative and Day of Prayer conference.

Until then, here are three things I learned at the Gather Rise national women’s conference that took place in Toronto in October.

1) A sisterhood, like CBWOQ, exists for a cause larger than itself.

2) We must always ask the questions: Who’s missing from this sisterhood? Who’s not here?

3) Sisterhood is for rising up and carrying our sisters, one at a time.

Do take some time during November to rise up with your Baptist sisters around the world to pray the issues that threaten or confront all of us every day: poverty, exploitation, violence against women, illiteracy, gender inequality, a decaying creation.

Finally, in this season of Advent, I pass along Sarah Bessey’s invitation. At the conference, Sarah asked us to make it a radical spiritual discipline of our lives to live like we are already loved. This season, remember that God has not forgotten you. You are loved (Isaiah 49:15-18).

Have a Spirit-filled Christmas.

RJ 

Cover artwork: Nativity, by Sharon Tiessen, artist-inresidence, Weston Park Baptist Church, Toronto

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VOLUME 89, NUMBER 6

live • November - December 2016

Editor and communications director Renée James 416-651-8967 rsejames@gmail.com Art director Donna Lee Pancorvo of GEPM Group Inc. (www.gepmgroup.com) Contributors Laura Lee Bustin, Linda Ellsworth, Meagan Gillmore, Karen Hilliker, Ann-Margret Hovsepian, Dr. Judith Mercer, Sandi Smoker, Dr. Cynthia Long Westfall, Morgan Wolf Circulation and subscriptions Subscriptions 416-620-2954 bwoq@baptist.ca Subscriptions Individual: $20* (direct or through promoters) US & overseas: $39 All currency in $C unless otherwise noted.

The publication of comments, opinions, or advertising does not necessarily imply CBWOQ agreement or endorsement. All material is copyrighted and may not be reproduced in print or on websites without permission. Advertising inquiries and freelance submissions should be addressed to the editor. Deadline is six weeks before the month of publication.

Member, Canadian Church Press.

ISSN 2293-5096.

Canada Post Customer Number 1008592.

We acknowledge the financial support of the Government of Canada through the Canada Periodical Fund (CPF) for our publishing activities.

*includes HST

global mission

Women’s Literacy in Rwanda Photo credit: Janice Mills

Laetitia Dusabimana is the head of the women’s department in the Association of Rwandan Baptist Churches (AEBR). In that role she leads and coordinates activities of all women’s ministries within the denomination. She also plays a huge role in the women’s literacy program sponsored by Canadian Baptist Ministries (CBM) in partnership with the AEBR. Earlier this year, Laetitia spoke to Laura Lee Bustin, CBM global field staff in Rwanda, about her work among Rwandan women.

by Laura Lee Bustin Article appears courtesy Cindy MacDonald, editor, Tidings magazine.

Laura Lee Bustin and her family are CBM global field staff working in Photos courtesy Janice Mills, CBM Rwanda.

CBM: Tell us a bit about yourself.

Laetitia: I am 35 years old. I am married to Gatera and we have three children, Milka, Annie and Brian. Milka is in her second year of nursery school but Annie and Brian are still too young for that.

I have a bachelor of theology degree from Ndejje University in Uganda (partnered with a Rwandan seminary).

CBM: How long have you been connected with the projects sponsored by CBM in partnership with the AEBR? Laetitia: I have been involved with them for about six years. I started with the literacy project in 2010.

CBM: What can you tell us about these projects?

Laetitia: The literacy project has the goal of empowering

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global mission women so they are engaged and actively participating in their church community and family life. We want to strengthen the intellectual wellbeing of women through literary education along with strengthening their socio/ economic wellbeing through associations. As well, we hope to support graduates of the program in promoting and developing a culture of reading among their families.

The literacy project is made up of 11 groups in seven of the AEBR regions. Over 4,100 women have graduated during the past six years and there are 889 participants this year. The women meet for two hours a day, three days a week, over a six-month period. Prior to the start of the course they are evaluated and then placed according to their reading level into one of two classes. They then study using materials produced by the Bible Society. At the end of this period a graduation is held.

The women’s empowerment project is intended to strengthen the AEBR women’s structure to be operational and functional from the local church level up to the general headquarters. Training is provided in the areas of basic leadership and administration.

As well, both women and men leaders receive training on gender equality. This has an impact on the whole community—women are empowered and the instances of domestic violence are lowered.

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Women’s groups also receive training on entrepreneurship based on the Village Savings and Loans (VSLA) model. Right now they are focused on savings and loans only but we have a target of including income-generating activities in future years. This is a new project which began in 2015 and includes all 13 AEBR regions.

CBM: You are also a leader within your denomination, the AEBR. What can you tell us about that?

Laetitia: I am the head of the women’s department for the AEBR. This is one of five departments within the AEBR. It assures leadership and coordination of all women’s activities within our denomination. Seventy per cent of church members in the AEBR are women, so this is an important role.

As a leader I feel compassion with regard to women. I like the way the church supports women to strengthen them. Also, the women’s ministry is receiving help from partners which makes it run smoothly. Financial partners include CBM and the Baptist Union of Denmark (BUD). We also receive help with trainers from the Ministry of Gender and Family within the Rwandan government.

I like how the women I work with—both on the leadership

level and women in the churches —are committed to their work, and I hope to see women improve their livelihood. Some of the areas of focus for the women’s department include development initiatives encouraging women to work together within associations, evangelism initiatives including a women’s crusade at the regional level along with prayers for women at the local/regional/ national levels.

In the area of social initiatives, the groups in local churches encourage genocide widows to help each other and they try to support each other according to local needs and problems.

Examples of this include teaching in the area of hygiene, building toilets, planting kitchen gardens, etc.

CBM: Do you have any specific prayer requests that the women could remember you in?

Laetitia: Please pray for the women’s ministry within the AEBR. Pray for spiritual growth of women and for strong women who can handle problems like poverty and violence against women and children. Pray that they would be self-reliant and full of self-confidence!

Thank you so much for your interest and support, both financially and through prayer. 

You contribute to the women’s literacy program in Rwanda when you take part in the Great Canadian Bible Study. Learn more on page 22. If you’d like to pray for Laetitia, read “A Window On Africa” on page 5.

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global mission

A WINDOW on Africa As members of the North American Baptist Union (NABWU), we were asked to partner in prayer with the Baptist Women’s Union of Africa (BWUA). We do so by detailing prayer ˘ requests in every issue of live magazine. Let us pray for shalom in the lives of the women and families represented by these requests.

Greetings. Allow me to say thank you for all your prayers while I travelled to attend subregional conferences from June to July this year.

Please pray for the following: 1) For new BWUA leaders for the next five years 2) God’s provision for adequate rain as Southern Africa waits for the rainy season to begin.

3) For great things to come out of the Zimbabwe annual conference held by Baptist women in late October.

5) For strength as Africa continues to face a terrible economic meltdown.

Joina hlula, BWUA President “Be strong and be very courageous.” (Joshua 1:7)

Prayers for Rwanda Serving in Rwanda, Janice Mills and her family are global field staff with Canadian Baptist Ministries. These are her prayer requests. Read more about the scale of CBM’s women’s literacy program in Rwanda on pages 3-4. Did you know that when you take part in the Great Canadian Bible Study for 2017, you support that program? Learn how to take part on page 22.

Women’s Empowerment meetings Pray for the women who came to the Women’s Empowerment meetings this year. Over 500 women came to hear about leadership, entrepreneurship, rights and freedoms, health and nutrition. They promised to go back to their villages and teach 100 other women.

We hope that all 38,000 women in the AEBR hear about their rights especially . . . rights such as 1) inheriting land, 2) deciding on birth control, 3) education, 4) a safe environment (no domestic violence) Next year they have asked us to teach the men. Do pray that the men are open to empowering the women as we all know that a stronger woman means a stronger family and a stronger community.

Guardians of Hope • Pray that when the rains come they will be enough to bring a good harvest.

• Women are raising pigs. Pray that when piglets are born that it is not too cold and that they survive their first night. Then the women in the co-ops can share in the care of them and in the profits from their sale.

• Pray that the children in the Guardians of Hope programs will have hope for the future despite having HIV/AIDs. • Pray for those that are starting new co-ops to be wise and to have trust in each other.

Women’s Literacy Program • Pray that this program continues to educate young girls and old women.

• Pray for Laetitia as she visits all the sites (a lot of travelling into rural areas). She makes 66 visits a year. Pray that she stays safe and stays strong both physically and emotionally. 

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global mission

When Passion Grows Stronger One woman’s call to overseas missions Rev. Dr. Judith Mercer desires to be a woman after God’s own heart. Her many STMs aside, Judith finds the time and space to serve her local community at Open Arms Mission in Welland where she helps women become self-sufficient.

For over 30 years, she’s formally mentored, and continues to mentor, dozens of women.

Describe your call to overseas short-term missions (STMs).

The night that I accepted Jesus, I knew I was called to missions and working with women in particular. I went on the mission field shortly after I trained as a medical technician, working at hospitals serving Indigenous peoples in northern Canada. I loved it and wanted to continue.

After five years I knew I needed more Bible basics and experience. I chose to enter Ontario Theological Seminary and pursued a masters of divinity in counselling.

Missions still had my heart and the door opened to train and work as a chaplain. I felt that chaplaincy work was another side of the manyfaceted work of missions. I loved my time in prison, hospital and longterm care chaplaincy. I gained good experience working with women in all circumstances and all ages. My chaplaincy experience also introduced me to some women who worked in women’s ministry and who became great mentors to me.

My first taste of overseas missions came with an STM to Kenya in August 2011 where we helped build a dam. We worked hard but knowing that the people would have water year round was so satisfying. When I saw a picture of the dam filled with water during the rainy season I was elated.

My passion for mission has not changed much over the 48 years since I became a Christian. If anything, it has become even more of a passion.

My hope was to retire and do STMs involving women wherever the Lord sent me. He has fulfilled that hope, sending me to Cuba (2014) and South Africa (2015) with Canadian Baptist Women of Ontario and Quebec.

Check baptistwomen.com regularly for new mission opportunities.

Judith hopes to go to Haiti in August 2017 with CBWOQ.

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live • November - December 2016

Carrying rocks for a dam in Changundi, Kenya (August 2011)

Working with women’s groups in Holguin, Cuba (November 2015)

Teaching prison chaplains in Holguin, Cuba (November 2015)

Counselling course in QwaQwa, South Africa (April 2016)

global mission What do you do on your STMs? Other than the building of the dam in Kenya, the other STMs have seen me work with women’s groups and train prison chaplains (women and men). Through it all, I have enjoyed wonderful times of meeting, sharing, working and praying with the women I meet.

Since my first STMs to Cuba and South Africa, I’ve had the privilege of returning to both countries.

In QwaQwa, South Africa, I was invited to train leaders in counselling techniques. I was welcomed back with hugs, happy faces and the love of my sisters and brothers in Christ. I came home tired but feeling that God was in every part of the training; that what He wanted accomplished was finished.

In Cuba I was invited to return as the speaker at a prison chaplains conference. Leaders I had met with during the first trip with CBWOQ welcomed me back and I met new people and got to know them well.

At the conference, I spoke about using the opportunity of services at the prison to help heal the women and men. Cuba’s prison system is very different from ours. I was able to train attendees in methods to get the Gospel to the inmates in a way that was acceptable to the prison authorities as well as healing for the prisoners. During the training I was able to counsel the chaplains as well. There were also pastors present who had had nowhere to go for training and had attended the conference. I made sure that I trained in a way that they could also use the ideas in their churches.

How did God equip and prepare you?

The Lord prepared me through seminary and through the variety of opportunities I have had to do ministry.

I have been a missionary to Indigenous peoples, a pastor, a counsellor and a chaplain.

The people that I worked with—men and women—were good mentors. Although I believe that God called me to work with women, I had, and have to be willing, to work with the men that surround those women.

As women, married, single, or single again, we have to work with the men in our lives. We are a community and we grow emotionally and spiritually,

women and men, together. I also believe that as sisters in Christ we need to stand up, speak and work with other women in our lives at home and everywhere that God calls us.

Anything else about STMs? I can’t begin to tell you how much I gain from doing STMs. For example, in Qwa Qwa, I met a woman who inspires me. We just seemed to bond immediately.

She is 72, retired from World Vision, and now works with the women in her church. On my STM, we talked a lot about Christianity and women and how women can be the ones who bring Jesus Christ to our villages, towns and cities. We keep in touch through letters.

I recommend STMs to anyone who wants to grow personally, emotionally and spiritually. I intend to continue with them as long as the Lord keeps sending me. By the time you read this, I’ll be speaking again at the prison chaplain’s conference in Cuba. I’m there with the Lord at my side! 

Bernice’s Pick . . .

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by Geri Scazzero $15 Geri Scazzero knew there was something desperately wrong with her life.

She felt like a single parent raising her four young daughters alone. She finally told her husband, “I quit,” and left the thriving church he pastored, beginning a journey that transformed her marriage and her church, and thousands of others around the world.

In The Emotionally Healthy Woman, Geri provides you a way out of an inauthentic, superficial spirituality to genuine freedom in Christ. This book is for every woman who thinks, “I can’t keep pretending everything is fine!”

5 International Blvd.

Etobicoke, ON M9W 6H3 Tel: 416-620-2934 Fax: 416-234-8840 E-mail: books@readon.ca www.readon.ca Photo courtesy E. Barnes

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reaching my nation

Providing Shalom Refugee sponsorship expands an alreadylarge family Women at Kingsway Baptist Church in Toronto weren’t expecting to become late-in-life mothers and grandmothers to a Syrian couple and their two young boys, but that’s what happened in February 2016. It’s been different than anticipated, but they wouldn’t change a thing.

In November 2015, Kingsway, like many Canadian congregations, committed to sponsor a Syrian refugee family.

It was the first time the church had done so. Their only request: that someone in the family have a disability. They were prepared for that. Medical professionals who attend the church could help the family navigate the medical system. The church has practical experience, too. It runs a program, rEcess, where volunteers provide childcare to children with disabilities and their siblings, so their parents can spend time together.

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live • November - December 2016

In fall 2014, CBWOQ supported rEcess with a New Initiatives grant.

reaching my nation The sponsorship committee considered a family of four with two sons: a healthy two-year-old and an infant who needed heart surgery. “In a sense we don’t really feel that we’ve brought over a family with a disability because [the son’s medical condition] won’t likely be something that’s ongoing,” says Ramona Matthews, a sponsorship committee member who also volunteers at rEcess.

The boy underwent surgery at SickKids Hospital in April. He appears to have no significant complications. “But we’re content that this family is the one that we were meant to have.”

It helps that many committee members are retired. They have something many younger committee members don’t: time. That’s crucial when helping newcomers settle.

Granted, Ramona, a former schoolteacher, never anticipated how her involvement would grow. Initially she agreed to oversee furnishing the apartment so she could be “minimally involved, but still really helpful.”

Now, she provides transportation, childcare during weekly English lessons and teaches the mother a weekly English lesson at home. She’s taught newcomers English for years. Her experience as a special education teacher helps her create individualized lessons, cutting out magazine pictures of makeup and jewellery to engage the mother.

She’s “folded . . . into my life,” Ramona explains.

She compares welcoming refugees to having a “family member who suddenly appears out of nowhere and you need to be there with them.”

Ramona isn’t the only woman using her professional experience to settle the family. Pat Simon agreed to help orient them to Canada, which largely required making a binder with contact information for, and pictures of, committee members and information about government, emergency services and community resources.

Pat, a former home economist, is most proud of the three-page grocery list, with items printed in English and Arabic. She stocked the family’s pantry with items labelled in English and Arabic to help

them shop for familiar foods.

“I know how important food is to anybody, and particularly when you’re in an unfamiliar environment,” she says. “I was confident that by giving them this I would increase their comfort level.”

But friendship is what makes the family comfortable.

“It was never an obligation,” says Pat, who sees them weekly and threw the mother a birthday tea party. “At the beginning it was a commitment. Now the commitment is there, but it’s a friendship.”

She knows how newcomers need friendship.

Born in Scotland, she moved to Canada from South Africa when her children were young. Pat stayed home while her husband worked and her children attended school. “That experience has prompted me to reach out to people who are displaced not by their own choice, not by any fault of their own,” she says.

There have been challenges. The son’s chances of surviving the surgery were always good, but it was tense. Google Translate is unreliable. The family doesn’t have a car; trips with an interpreter require extra vehicles.

But the family is incredibly hospitable. Shortly after arriving, the mother served some committee members one of the few items she’d brought to Canada: shortbread cookies her aunt had made.

They invited church members to the youngest’s first birthday party.

The family jokes that Kingsway is like their extended family. But the love is serious and strong.

Potential refugee sponsors should “get ready to have [their] heartstrings tugged,” says Pat. But in many ways, sponsorship reveals what’s already there. 

by Meagan Gillmore Meagan Gillmore is a freelance writer and editor in Toronto. She is a member of New City Baptist Church, Toronto.

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reaching my nation reaching my nation Bridgette and daughter, Easther were former residents of Matthew House, Ottawa Photo credit: Stephanie J. Robertson

Widows and Orphans How Matthew House Ottawa will use its 2016 World Day of Prayer grant Matthew House Ottawa (MHO) will use its US $1,000 grant from the 2016 North American Baptist Women’s Union(NABWU) World Day of Prayer to purchase feminine hygiene products and diapers for refugee women and children.

Earlier this fall, executive director Miriam Rawson updated live magazine on the impact this grant will have.

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What was the need? Why did you apply for this grant?

We always have the ongoing need of helping our women residents to attend to their monthly hygiene needs. And that’s an ongoing need that’s hard to ask for from churches, though women’s groups are great at providing or funding those supplies. Sanitary pads are expensive.

They cost an average $15 - $30 per cycle and most residents only get $276 per month. So it’s quite a good deal of money. We recognized that every little bit of funding we could get towards purchasing these supplies would help.

In 2015 we had a baby who needed formula because her mother couldn’t breastfeed. We had no infant formula on hand and ended up organizing a neighbourhood drive for diapers and formula. I began to think that we needed to have supplies and funds to purchase supplies for the next time. Women needed to be able to choose the formula they wanted to use for their babies, for example. So that neighbourhood drive was the catalyst for us to apply to NABWU. Did you think you would get a grant?

You’re never sure, but I did make a firm and sure request. These are issues particular to all women. $1,000 doesn’t seem like a lot.

It’s US dollars—so it will stretch here with the exchange rate. It’s a projection based on past needs for our residents. There are other organizations that will help with diapers and formula—we wanted to just make sure we had funds for supplies until our residents could access them.

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reaching my nation How will the funds be used?

They will be used to buy diapers and formula as needed. We will do quarterly toiletries runs for sanitary pads and price match.

We want to have some pads on hand to be able to provide in each woman’s welcome package.

Lament of a Canadian White Woman

What will the impact be?

Well, women won’t have to spend money. I hope it communicates to the women coming in that we see the whole person; that we welcome her with open hands and will do our best to be generous. Also, women coming to us may find asking for sanitary pads very shaming. So to know that those are already provided may lighten some stress.

Forgive us our ignorance and our arrogance . . . we do not and have never “known better.“

Any other updates to give us?

It may be helpful for live readers to know that, with few exceptions, the bulk of women residents this year have come from Burundi. Burundi has collapsed into civil war. This is a country that’s gone through cycles of civil unrest and war.

Female residents are often far more vulnerable when they arrive and that’s, more often than not, because of sexual violence. It’s a very sad but true phenomenon.

Help us to do better as You would have us do.

How may we pray for you and the ministry?

Pray for finances. We have a deficit this year. Pray for God’s strength and encouragement as I continue to lead.

RJ 

Holy Spirit, We pray for our Aboriginal sisters . . . our mothers, our daughters , our aunties, and our grandmothers For those we know and those we will never meet . . . or those we have learned of and those we have ignored Forgive us our sins, O God.

Forgive us for not raising our voices When Aboriginal children were taken And cabbages counted.* When the wisdom of the First Peoples has been ignored And their dignity squashed.

When prison has been easier Than understanding why.

You, Creator God, intend so much more for Your peoples.

You intend so much more from Your people—and as women of God, we too often have failed.

Help us, as women of God, to seek ways to work with our First Nations, Inuit and Métis cousins . . . to understand one another and find justice and reconciliation for committed wrongs. . . . to lead the way in speaking out . . . with the wisdom of our grandmothers . . . with respect and strength and love.

God, help us to awaken our communities, our churches, our institutions and our governments so that Your healing power might be at work. May truth and respect be valued for all people in this land.

May peace and justice be the hope of Your creation. Amen. 

by Karen Hilliker Karen is a friend of Aylmer Baptist Church, having gone on short term missions with women from the church. When asked to pray for Indigenous women, she wrote this prayer.

*An Indigenous mother who lost her husband in a fatal car accident, was left with seven kids. When officials came to talk to her about assistance, they counted the cabbages in her garden and deducted them from what she was entitled to receive.

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Bible study

Living in Shalom

Most know that the Hebrew word shalom is understood around the world to mean peace.

However, peace is only one small part of the meaning.

According to Strong’s Concordance, shalom means completeness, wholeness, health, peace, welfare, safety, soundness, tranquility, prosperity, perfectness, fullness, rest, harmony, the absence of agitation or discord.

Shalom comes from the root verb shalom meaning to be complete, perfect and full. (www.therefinersfire.org) BigStockPhoto.com

by Linda Ellsworth Linda is the member care coordinator for Christian Camping International, Canada.

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Take a good look at the definition of shalom, and ask yourself; “Am I living in complete, perfect, restful health in all the fullness God the Father intends for me?”

If your answer to the former question was “no,” don’t despair . . . you are in well-known company. Let’s take a look at the life of David.

READ I Samuel 16:12-13 Compare these verses with verse 7. Does the anomaly strike you? _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ Yet, in God’s eyes and divine plan, David apparently had it all!

READ Psalm 145 In this Psalm, David exhibits complete confidence in a living, sovereign God. List all the attributes of God described by a very “whole” David living in a place of “shalom.” (Hint, I found over 20!) _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ Yet David was not always living in shalom, and in our day-to-day struggles to find balance, neither are we.

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Barriers to experiencing shalom What issues kept David, and keep us, from experiencing the perfect peace that God offers us in Christ?

Take a look at the struggles recorded by David (and a few other poets) in the Psalms. Record what each psalm reveals about the key issue, the psalmist’s reaction to the issue, and which of the four area(s) of his life (spiritual, physical, emotional, mental) were impacted.

Sin - Psalm 51 _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ Fear - Psalm 18: 1-6, Psalm 56 _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ Illness - Psalm 102 _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ Stress - Psalm 69 _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ Loneliness - Psalm 69 _________________________

Bible study

_________________________ _________________________

_________________________ _________________________

Sadness/Depression - Psalm 77:110a _________________________ _________________________ _________________________

The Word of God is the powersource of transformation available to us! Allow it into the very marrow of your existence. Live in it daily.

Loss/Grief - Friends - Psalm 55 _________________________ _________________________ _________________________

READ John 1:1-14 The Word of God became flesh . . . transformed Himself into a body who could identify with every issue we could face. This truth heals me _________________________ _________________________ _________________________

Loss/Grief - Loved Ones 2 Samuel 12: 15-25 _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ (note verse 13!)

Use a separate page to make note of the context (work, church/ mission, family and friends) in which each of the above struggles occurred in your life, and the resulting effect on a) you and b) those around you. _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ Don’t you long to taste God’s shalom? To live in shalom with God? Healing READ Isaiah 55 and let God’s promises flood over your soul.

Here the Word strongly invites you to be healed by: _________________________

READ Hebrews 4: 12-16 The Word of God is sharp and powerful and discerning, but the Word is also the High Priest who makes the way for us to draw near to God’s throne, finding helping in our times of deepest need. This truth heals me _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ READ Psalm 61, and take refuge in your Rock.

God never promises to change our circumstances, He only promises to change us. This truth heals me _________________________ _________________________ _________________________

READ Psalm 42, and let yourself long for Him. This truth heals me _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ READ Psalm 103 and call to mind all that He has done for you. This truth heals me _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ READ Psalm 139 and allow the intensity of your Creator to wash over and through you. This truth heals me _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ READ Psalm 147:3 and rest in Him as He lovingly binds up the sorrows of your broken heart. This truth heals me _________________________ _________________________ _________________________ The joy in all this is that as we cling to and learn to consistently live in the Word, out of us will flow rivers of Living Water: life and mission by example; lifestyle evangelism; ministry in the everyday; forgiveness. And God will assure us that we are in the place of shalom living. Whole in the midst of a broken and hurting world. 

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feature article

Fight Your FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) Sealing the chinks with faith

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live • November - December 2016

I remember unsteadily tiptoeing on the soft mattress of my bed; chin resting on the high window sill. I peered through the green leaves of the rowan tree outside and heard the voices of neighbourhood children who hadn’t been called in yet. Their laughter and shouts punctuated the quiet of my room as the evening shadows lengthened. It seemed like I was being sent to bed in mid-afternoon. It seemed like everyone else was out having fun but me.

Being single at your church feels a little like that at times—like you’re on the outside looking in, or inside looking out, as the case may be—straining on your tiptoes to see what is happening for everyone else, before falling backward onto your pillow in isolated resignation to wonder at it all. God seems like that immoveable parent who could set you free, but doesn’t. And, why doesn’t He? That’s really the question.

Anyone who’s struggled with singleness has wondered, and we tend to wonder about it alone,

feature article because that’s the nature of the situation. Some people will grow frustrated with God’s apparently apathetic attitude regarding the passage of time and biological clocks and so forth; deciding to make their own disobedient plans. These are sad stories overlain with bitterness at the apparent stinginess of God. God—who seems to lavish good things on the unworthy but withholds even the crumbs from you. From me.

Here’s what I’ve learned walking this one road I’ve always dreaded walking: My faith needs testing because I don’t know where the chink in my armour resides. The breach will come where the shield is weak. It’s just that simple. If you believe God is good, faithful and the source of all provisioning in every area save one—believe me—that one area is where the fight of faith will be fiercest. That is where it is going to get bloody.

Maybe it isn’t singleness.

Maybe it is infertility, or feeling that God has laid something important on your life to do, but no matter how hard you try, every door seems not only closed, but quite possibly welded shut and disguised with the kind of enchantments used to hide the door to Moria. You begin to think that God is a divine Joker— creating the desire for marriage or children or a particular path in you, and then laughing maniacally as you hopelessly try

to dig yourself out of the well of desire.

The testing reveals—as these things always seem to do—that we don’t know God very well.

We don’t understand His heart or character or intentions toward us. Why tell Abraham he would be the father of many nations if God wasn’t going to bring it to pass for a hundred years? Wasn’t it inevitable that Abraham and Sarah began to think that maybe they had to come up with a way to bring about God’s purpose?

Wouldn’t it have been better if Abraham had just smothered the hope for children and legacy within himself until the angels brought the message about Isaac?

Clearly though, there is something important in how we long, in faith, for answers that only God can give.

The fight of faith isn’t fought by smothering. It is fought with a shield and a sword. It is about strengthening the weak places. It is about learning not to fear what you dread the most. It is about inviting the Holy Spirit to whisper over the weak place and shield you under His wings while the testing endures. It is saying with only the slimmest of willingness, “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.”

Instead, we are like the disciples in the storm, waking Jesus in a panic: “Lord, don’t you care that we are perishing?”

They didn’t know Jesus very well. They didn’t know that the One who called forth the starry host by name was with them. They didn’t experience the supernatural peace of Jesus’

Why doesn’t He? presence because they were looking at the water rather than the One who formed each hydrogen and oxygen molecule and bound them together in their own micro-trinity.

True peace is far more bold than just an experience of tranquility. It is the roof over your head and the fire in the hearth when a blizzard rages outside, rattling the windowpanes with the wind’s uttered threats. Peace is the covering in the midst of the storm—not the abatement of the storm itself.

Peace—shalom— is the presence of God. The storms—the bloody fights of faith—come and go.

Singleness. Marriage. Infertility.

Conquer one to find that another one appears in due season. But the presence of God is the Spirit of Peace that covers you while His grace transforms. 

by Morgan Wolf Morgan is a writer from Calgry, Alberta. She blogs about her faith and writing at www.anothergratuitousmdash.blogspot.ca.

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feature article

Shalom in Singleness Singularly His

For the longest time, my biggest struggle with being single was the not knowing: Am I already at my final destination or am I still in the hallway moving toward the room marked Marriage? Is this it or does God have something else in mind for me?

I struggled to allow this part of my life to remain a mystery. About a month before my 39th birthday, after yet another potential relationship door closed behind me, I finally decided to simply choose singleness for myself so that I could stop wondering.

That gave me a sense of control but, in hindsight, it was a form of self-preservation and a cop-out because I no longer had to wait on God. The Lord allowed me to operate under this

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feature article delusion for about three years, until I realized He had never asked me to give up the desire for marriage. He was simply calling me to trust Him, day by day, and to find my joy and contentment in my relationship with Him. Most of the Christian women I know believe marriage is something beautiful and hope to, if they haven’t yet, meet a godly man to spend the rest of their lives with. As they mature, however, they recognize that marriage is not a cure-all. It is not a guarantee of happiness. It is not a ticket to freedom, security, companionship or fulfilment. They see their married friends go through ups and downs just like they do and they learn to put marriage in its right place in their lives.

Some see their circumstances as a calling while others hold on to the hope that God may yet bring someone into their lives. Still others, like I used to, seesaw on the subject, at times feeling determined to remain single and then, after a focussed season, opening their hearts again to the possibility of marriage.

Whatever the case, many of the challenges—and blessings—of being single seem common across the board. I chatted with five Christian girlfriends who have been on their own for a long time about finding peace and contentment—shalom—in the framework of singleness.

Negative or Positive?

The main downside of being single is straightforward: loneliness. Debbie sometimes feels like the “odd man out” when spending time with couples. “They talk about their children or grandchildren, and it always makes me a bit sad.” For Christiane, the challenges have been more external than internal. People in relationships “have treated me as though I am invisible or of a lower status than themselves,” she says.

Scripture reveals God favours neither getting married nor remaining single, but supports both scenarios as viable options for believers who are willing to trust and obey His leading (1 Corinthians 7).

I like how Vaughan Roberts puts it: “As long as you have [singleness], it’s a gift from God, just as marriage will be God’s gift if you ever receive it. We should receive our situation in life, whether it is singleness or marriage, as a gift of God’s grace to us.”

Being single is not a life sentence but it’s also not an indicator of selfishness. “It’s making the most of the life God has given me,” says Christiane. “I tend to lose myself in relationships. Being single allows me the freedom to truly be me.”

Salena enjoys being the “go to girlfriend” to hang out with at movies or local events, or the friend to call “late at night when a crisis arises and [prayers are needed] . . . I have a lot of opportunities to connect with God in actual quietness at home.”

God was calling me Patti says that to trust Him the best part of being single has been “finding out how much Jesus loves me—that He is my provider, my protector, my confidant. For me, the key [is] bringing every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. As I ask God to match my thoughts to His, my thinking shifts and becomes clearer, my pain or loneliness less acute, and quite often the result is genuine joy as I see God build my confidence and purpose and surprise me in ways I never dreamed of.”

I don’t know how many times I’ve cautioned single friends: “If you’re not content as a single person, you won’t be content when you’re married.” Peace— shalom—isn’t the by-product of having our dreams come true. It is the result of handing over the steering wheel of our lives to God and trusting Him to steer us toward His glorious riches, treasures we cannot even imagine! 

by Ann-Margret Hovsepian Ann-Margret Hovsepian is an author and illustrator who serves at Temple Baptist Church in Montreal and with Quebec Baptist Women.

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feature article

The Art of listening well How do we offer shalom?

Wholeness through listening

Artwork by Sharon Tiessen

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Michelle Miller knows about shalom. She is the founder of REED—Resist Exploitation, Embrace Dignity—a ministry that advocates for prostituted women on Vancouver’s downtown eastside.

Michelle broadens my understanding of shalom—not only peace but wholeness, “where nothing is missing and nothing is broken.”

Under God’s gaze, Michelle is a compelling force of love, called to her particular vocation.

God’s gaze falls on us too. “Like the sun . . . his gaze is creative, generative and originative . . . it is mirrored above all in the gracious act of vocation” (Prayer, Balthasar). Balthasar reminds us that God is creative, generative and originative and so it makes sense that bringing shalom takes many forms and bears fruit through vocation.

In my vocation, I meet with women who are experiencing disruption in their emotional lives. My aim is to bring shalom by examining what is

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feature article missing and broken—places where emotional pain inhibits or puts a stop to the ability to function. My hope is for wholeness through listening.

We don’t hear a lot about the skill of listening in our verbose culture. Dale Carnegie’s popular program helps us to speak well, but who helps us quiet down and listen? Listening to God and others is an ancient practice. The Shema begins, “Hear, O Israel!” (Deuteronomy 6:4). The prophet Isaiah reminds us, “Listen, so that you may live” (Isaiah 55:3).

Jesus also encourages us, “Those who have ears, let them hear” (Mark 4:9).

These imperatives prompt us to listen well. To that end, I offer us three specific ways to listen that might help us bring shalom to those we serve.

1. Attunement By cultivating a listening posture toward God through prayer, I sense the Holy Spirit attuning me to the ways He comforts and counsels me. The listening skills I practice in prayer are transferable and help me attune to others. Attunement means I turn my face toward another and register her presence.

Attuning to someone, not in a detached or instrumental way, but with love, opens the possibility of an empathetic connection. The seed of trust grows in attuned soil, where the other is invited into “a listening shelter of kindness” (The Cultivated Life, Phillips).

2. Attending Attending first means orientation to God’s Word.

Psalm 119 reminds me that I walk by the lighted path, and the Living Word, Christ Himself, listens and guides me. I learn to trust God’s generative processes as I participate in His work already underway.

While attuning puts a person on my radar, attending is my act of noticeable response.

By paying attention to her, asking for clarity, paraphrasing her words, I learn something of who she is and how she navigates her place in the world.

Here, I discern what she is saying about how best she receives God’s creative restoration through our encounter.

Professor of theology, Belden Lane, writes that the practice of paying attention is the rarest of gifts because it depends upon the harshest of disciplines.

That discipline, in my experience, is suspending my own needs. Only as I am aware of God’s love for me am I able to take my ego by the ear, sit it on a stool in the next room and shut the door. Only then can I truly behold the person with me.

3. Accompanying “Accompanying other people on their journeys of faith sheds light on who the Holy One is, as well as on what is possible in a life of faith” (The Cultivated Life, Phillips). Accompanying is Jesus coming alongside the pair on the Emmaus Road—walking, listening, talking—patient for an invitation to share a table.

Sometimes accompanying is defined as holding space for another. It begins with acceptance. I do not accompany to manipulate, or to prescribe my ideas of what the journey should be for someone else.

Great care is needed if shalom is my aim. So I walk humbly, prayerfully, with grace and respect for the others’ processes. With patience, I honour God’s slow work.

God, in His originality, calls His beloved children to Himself through a variety of circumstances, and our responses to His call are as varied as we are. In my efforts to bring shalom to others, I hear their stories and bear witness to their God-given belovedness.

Through the grace of listening—attuning, attending and accompanying another—wholeness, mine and theirs, is possible. 

by Sandi Smoker Sandi is the former president of Women in Focus (the women’s ministry arm of Canadian Baptists of Western Canada). Currently taking a masters in spiritual theology at Regent College, she volunteers as a counsellor and course facilitator at South Island Centre for Counselling and Training in Victoria, B.C.

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USING MY GIFTS

Biblical Principles for Women in Ministry Am I Called to Ministry?

Dr. Cynthia Westfall continues her series on biblical equality in ministry. This is the third article. You’ll find the first installments in this series in the May/June and September/October 2016 issues.

In the September/October issue 2016, Dr. Westfall detailed two key pieces of the foundation to any woman’s calling to ministry: understanding what the Bible says about women in ministry, and authenticity.

In this article, she explores three more pieces of that foundation.

BigStockPhoto.com

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Gifting Can you identify your particular skills and interests that have emerged in the home, workplace or society?

The Bible is clear that every woman is created and called to serve God in some form of ministry. In Romans 12:3–5, we see that every believer has at least one gift “according to the grace given to us” and that we must think soberly and sensibly about our gift. When we recognize the strengths and competencies that God has given us, those are what we are supposed to offer in service for God and the Church.

If you have good insight into who and what you are, the formula that determines how you serve God in ministry is straightforward: “If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully” (Romans 12:6-8 TNIV). This list is neither exhaustive nor specific, because God is incredibly creative in the gifts that He gives us.

If a woman is gifted with serving, showing mercy or giving, that does not necessarily mean that she is limited to serving in traditional women’s roles. Some of the ministry trends that I have seen in the 21st century are women reaching people for Christ through ministries that are restaurants, shops and coffee houses, as well as women effectively ministering through full-time counselling and prayer ministries. As far as giving, women have traditionally been effective fundraisers, some of whom founded many of the missionary societies as well as other services to the church and community.

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USING MY GIFTS Experience Have you experienced a call to ministry? This is often a hard question for even seminary students to answer, but hopefully we now have some pieces in place to understand that question. As you work through this question and the one above, what are your answers, what are your feelings and what are your desires? Do you now have any sense of what God wants you to do?

According to Romans 12:1-8, we have a responsibility to determine ministry through our experience, observation and careful consideration. In other words, it is up to each individual to identify his or her own calling, and there is no calling without personal experience. So, are you ready to say “yes” to God’s call on your life?

Confirmation Are you waiting for permission or confirmation to minister from your church community or leadership? As I said above, the

Bible is clear that every woman is created and called to serve God in some form of ministry, which can theoretically be the exercise of any one of the spiritual gifts, and the Church has an obligation to identify and utilize those gifts.

The heart of a church’s ministry and mission ought to be done voluntarily by the congregation.

Historically, women have been instrumental in building the Church and spreading the Gospel in traditional and nontraditional ways, which should be celebrated.

However, if you feel a call to preach or teach, or you feel a call to ordination and fulltime ministry, and your church does not confirm your ministry because you’re a woman, what then?

The feedback of our church community is an important part of the experience that we consider in determining our call— that’s why we have the process of ordination. However, if your

Canadian Baptists of Ontario and Quebec ordained their first female clergy in 1947. Muriel Spurgeon Carder received a call from God to be a minister when she was in high school. She prepared for ordination in the face of doubts and opposition, and was ordained to be a minister when she completed her bachelor of divinity at the age of 25. She went to the mission field in India where she evangelized, worked with Bible translation and taught seminary. Upon retirement she served as a hospital chaplain in Ontario.

Since 1947, women have been called by God to full-time service and continue to be ordained by the CBOQ to serve in all aspects of ministry including the pastorate.

church has policies that restrict women in ministry, or if the members in your congregation have a visceral antipathy against the leadership of women, you may experience suspicion and rejection.

In such a case, permission, confirmation and ordination would not be an option for any woman, so that should not be understood as a negation of your call. You have two options: stay where you are and become a prophet who demonstrates the validity of your calling in word and deed, or pursue your calling in a church that is willing to affirm, confirm and ordain you.

When all else fails, remember how Jesus and the apostle Paul served God in spite of the opposition, and you’ll be in good company.

Do you have any questions about this article? Cindy is happy to answer them. Contact her at westfal@mcmaster.ca. 

by Dr. Cynthia Long Westfall Cynthia is assistant professor of New Testament at McMaster Divinity College in Hamilton.

This article printed with permission from Abingdon Press.

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women’s ministries women’s ministries

2017 Great Canadian Bible Study Every year, Baptist women across Canada meet in small groups to do a pre-set Bible study that focuses on women from the Bible. Participants bring a small offering to support a joint project that lasts for three years.

2017’s Bible Study: Tamar the Righteous What could possibly be admirable about Tamar’s actions that would warrant her a place in the list of the genealogies of Christ? Why should we consider Tamar as a definition of righteousness?

In this Bible study, Rev. Faye Reynolds shatters our preconceptions about Tamar.

How the project will work Your contributions to 2017’s Great Canadian Bible Study will continue to support the work that Canadian Baptist Ministries is doing alongside the Association of Baptist Churches of Rwanda (AEBR) in providing literacy classes for women. About 50

per cent of women living in AEBR communities are illiterate.

Most women’s groups pick a date in January but any date that works for you and your women will do.

You’ll find the Bible study in English, French and Spanish at www.baptistwomen.com. A Chinese translation will be available in November.

RJ 

We REMEMBER Thank you for your gifts in honour or in memory of family, friends and others you value. These gifts will continue to bring good from their lives.

In Memory of Helen Houghton, St. Thomas Nadia Nielsen, Brockville Enid Rowe, New Hamburg  Ross Adlington, Springford Michelle Kiddie, Springford IN HONOUR OF Ada Gale, Ottawa (100th birthday)

BAPTIST WOMEN SUNDAY For over 130 years, CBWOQ has given dignity to at-risk, vulnerable and exploited women and children in Canada and overseas.

That hasn’t changed. learn more | make a difference | plan a Baptist Women Sunday at your church

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On the last and greatest day of the festival, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whosoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.”

John 7:37-38 (NIV)

Come Thirsty.

Drink Deeply.

Christ’s call to transformed living CBWOQ WOMEN’S CONFERENCE Annual General Meeting Mississauga Chinese Baptist Church FRIDAY APRIL 28 – SATURDAY APRIL 29, 2017 MARK THE DATE!

Homeless in the world Christ of God, Child of Humankind, born homeless in the world, nurtured by the humble, quarry of death squads, refugee, exile, outsider, fringe-dweller, in our need we come to you now: That we might hear the story of Christmas anew.

Amen from Be Our Freedom Lord, edited by Terry C. Falla

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Ring the bells that still can ring, Forget your perfect offering.

There is a crack, a crack in everything That’s how the light gets in. from the lyrics of Anthem by Leonard Cohen

Artwork: Silver Bells by Connie James, Pencil crayon on Mi-tientes paper, 2014