Istoria 2005

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LINCOLNNORTI-ISTAR LITERARYPUBLICATION ISTORIA 2005

In lhe Greek Limesof gods, muses, and heroes, there was a reason for eve1:rthing.There was a legend for why the sky was decorated at night and each star had a sLory.In the event a weary captain was ti-«1versinghis ship across the high seas, these stories were meant to guide him, and whelher the stories were true or false · they were always memorable.

So hence was born Istoria, using the Greek word for story, which now is carried out in a very ditforenL Limeand place · a beautiful lradition lo be huilt upon year after year at Lincoln North Slar Iligh School.

Istoria staff would like to give a special thanks to Terry Diffenderfer for her encouragement and knowledgeable guidance, lo the English Deparlmcnl for its assistance with submissions, and to Dr. Nancy Becker for her generous support. \Ve apprccialc Ted Kooser's graciousness for giving permission to print his poem, Tattoo,and Augstums Printing for their capable printing services. The staff of Istoria would like lo give recognition most of all lo Susan Paschold, the teacher behind the ideas, behind the slUdents, and behind the scenes.

Sarah A. McCown, Editor-in-Chief

fsloria Mag11zinHS1;iff

Sponsor Mrs. Susan Paschold

E,ijior iu Chj,.f Sarah A. McCown Copy Eclil.or

Rohyn Sha1111011 01~~ii;nE1Iitors

Amanda Torwirl.

Del'ek Ofodirinwa Short Story Ed ilor Melissa Mol'g-.an Poetry Editors Nykky Chmstil Chl'issic Schneider Mamtging Editors Madelon Kcllc1· Ben Edwardson Staff Dana Hentschel

Sd~ction lloai·,I Advanced C1•1iative\Vril.ing Class Cover Desii;n Robyn Shan11011

TABLE O F CONTE NT S Tattoo, TedKooser............... ............................ .... ............. ....... .6 Smile Like You Menn lt.Alekiu, Rivas...... ....... ........ ............. ,.... ... 7 Reach, Emily Burbach........................ ......... ... ............ ............ ...8 Forgotten Puulc,AliHu ............... ....... .... .. ...... ... ...... ....... ...... ... 9 Fallen Bchi nd ,Ni kki Winccrsticn .................... .... ..... ............ ....... 10

Omngc, ElliouRob/,..... ............ ....................... ........ ......... ....... 11 Ludwig Van, 1/obp,Sha1111on ...... ........ .......... ............. ....... ......... 12 Scnsual,ilfelissa Morgan........ ...... ............. .................. ... .... ...... 13 Bus Stop Lady,Emi(rBurbach............... ............. ,..... ...... ....... .... 1ft I Love You, KelseySatrtz...... ...... ...... .................. ........................ 16 ......... ...... .. ............ ...... ... .. .... ....... 18 Dcprcssion, Bailey Cappellano I'm Sorry, K)'le Miller....................... ........ ............ ......... ....... ....19 Trying to Bum Up So me Timc in Englis h , ChaseDingle... .......... ....20 Erebus ,,lfcliisaMorgan........... ........ ........ ........... .................... ..21 1-lunds, MeganWillman...... .. ... ....... .................. ....... ............... ...22 Unti tled. Mekiu,Rivas...... ............ ......... ........ .... ,.. ............ ....... .24 Alonc, l!obJ71 Shannon............................. ............................... ..25 Alihc imer's, Megflut..cll . ......... ....... ....... ........ ...... ............. ...... 26 ............. .'rl Life Is, Asld,:rSchnell................................................

Passion, DanielKall ........ ...................... .. .. ........ .......... .. ... ... .... .28 Frien dship vs. the Wonder Bra, ElizabethMcClellan................ ... .... 3 1 ...... ....................................... ...... ..... .32 Fear ltsclf,Keb-eyCro">der Where is He? Amanda Torwirt........... ................ ....................... .33 Emo tions, Ellen IVilron ....... ........................... ........................... 34 Sw ing , Sarai,A. ,t/cCow1L.... ..... ... ...... ....... ... .......... ............ ... .... .35 Lt,tting Go, Kry'StaMangers.............. ..... ...................... ............. ..39 The Mother, Ben Estrella.... ........... ..... ......... ...... .......... ...... ...... .40 Joh n , A Marshmullow's Talc, 1}'lcrLambie)'........ .......... ......... ....... Al It's Saturday Aftemoo n,D czy Brucc......... .............. ................. .... 44 Chungc, 7yLuedtke.................................. ........ ................ .... ....46 Fate, Olivia ;\'guJr:n....... ........... .................. ........ ............ ,......... .46 Close Fricnd,Alanna Nunn..... ........ ................... ............ ............ 48 Our Creator, ChrissieSlmeider...... ..................................... ........ .49 I Am.Andr ew Afartinez ...... ... ......... ... ......... ... ....... ....... .... ... ..... ..50 Crue l lrony,Modc/011 Kcllcr....... .......... ....... ............................... 51 What is Frccdom,Jl/are11 Vik....... ........... .... .......... ...... ......... .......55 ..... .... ..................................... .56 Living in Death, ChristinaCopla11 Lend Mc Some l-lapry, Tris!,leifert ...... ....... ........ .... ............ ........ 59 Martiriez................................ ......... ........... (JO These Tea rs, A11drc:w Cheesecake, Amy Eudrulat......... ...... ............................... , ......... 61 Ilope, AslileySc/ii/ell............ ....... ... ................... .... ......... ....... ....63

TABLEOF CONTENTS Pence, JusrinSpilker......... ......................................................

64 The llous" Next Door,Jami,cC/caso11 ... .................................... Ga On How to Bea Go oil "Star" Stalker, 7}/er Lumbley................... ..66 What If? DezyBrucc ..............................................................

6!> Love or Death, Cl,rL<sie SchneidP.r .•........................................... 70 l'aper Skin. Amber Knig/,1.......................................................

71 Drcam,Laurcn 1Voften11m1 ... ..................•.................................

711 Hoppcnstancc,Snrah 11.McCown..............................................

75 Dc,ath of the Soldicrs,Amanda 1orwitt... ....................•.............. 77 Murdered Untouched, Tris!,{,dferi. ............................... ........... 78

Flower,Ashle.;rKnrb... ...........................................•................ i!} Ech0t.-s,DerekOfodiri11wa .......................... .•.•........................ 79 Shame, CassieOl<on................... ........................................... 83 lstmia Staff Phologr-Jphs .......................................................

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The Cover and Back Credits Fi,.t and last Lines StrLrtingFrom tlie 1bp Stranger in a Strange Land, Rohen A. Heinlein \.Viiard of Oz, L. Frank Baum The Village Smithy, CarollV.Clines A \.Vrinklc in Time, ilfadelineL'E'ngle Frankcnstein, lefary l¥n!lfto1wcrafi Sltelly Peter Pan,JamesMaulu!wBarrie The Road Less Traveled, RobertFrost Moby Dick, Herman Jlfclville Odyssey, Homer The Adventures of Alice in Wondcrland, lt::wis Carroll

-*-*-

Tat.too By: Tc<lKooser U.S poet Laureate and winner of the 2005 Pulitzer Prize vVhat once was n1eant to be a statement · a dripping dagger lteld in lhe fisl of a shuddering heart - is now just a bruise 011 a bony old shoulde1; the spot where vanity once punched him hard and the ache lingered on. He looks like someone you would reckon wilh, slrong as a slallion, fast and ornery, bul on this chilly morning, as he walks between the tables at a yard sale wilh the sleeves of his tight black T-sliirl rolled up to show us who be was, he is only anollier old man, picking up b1·oken tools and pulling them hack, his hearl gone soft and blue with stoi·ies.

Reprinted from Delights& Shadow by permission of author

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Smile likeyou mean il lJy: 111ekita Rivas

Smile like you mean it There's no need to pretend When I'm 1·ighthere Watching you Observing you Taking in your every move I understand This must have hcen dillicult And l know it won't ever Feel fair But mayhe ff you just Smile like you mean it The thirst of emptiness That lingers in your throat Would be easier to quench And the entire world Would hurt a little less One day We'll both look back And soak in the rays of r&gc That we never could Quite escape [t will ache then As it aches now But I promise If it's possible to Smile like you mean it Lile will get better Someho,v.

-·-·7

Reach

By:Emily Burbach A layer of gray light coats the horizon Light pollution from city streets deeply <:ontrasts against the moon's navy sl,ades The stars arc absent tonight A sky free of blemishes.

Thi: moon breaks the smooth surface like a drop creating ripples in a lake The only thing left in her yanl Not touched by the moon's cmhracc arc the dark arms of the trees Their shadows slither across the ground She concentrates on the light.

The air is brisk enough to make the tip of her nose tingle She &'l'ipsher fingers around the blue ca11vais Its cold transferring through her fin!,.-ersinto her warm body Pulling herself up, she rolls onto the dark tarp Bouncing higher She reaches for the buttety surface of the moon as if she was going to capture it Put it in a jar, like a firefly Lo keep its gleaming spirit close to her heart and light up every dark night The tips of her lingers can almost grasp that rocky SJ)hcrc Rut then the black mesh of the trampoline pulls her back into the soft resilient canvas Only to spring her back into the sky Reaching for the moon

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Forgotten Puzzle By:AliHu '\Veare God's forgotten pu1.:tlc, ln our box dark and untouched.

On the highest shelf W(: lie, Out orreach, dusty ancl faded.

Our prayers go unanswea·ed.

Our cl'ies go unheard, Please, put us together.

Ou1·pieces arc connected here, and there, bul never the whole picture.

The door opens, letting sunlight sb·earn in.

His hand driO.s,and hovers, ahove our forlon1 box.

Yesyes, oh please, take us down.

His hand passes by,and only the shadow of his an11, remains above us, as he selects another family to pleasantly piece together.

When is it our tum?

Are we going to end up the last box all alone?

Is that when we can finally, have our joy and peace?

-*-•9

Fallen Behind By:Nikki Winterstien "He died for his country ma'am, he was very brave," they said, then they left.

Left a mother sobbing because her son's not ever coming home.

A flag is all they lcfl her of a son she'll miss forever.

Al his funeral, they give her a medal a purple heart, it's not the color ol' the blood he shed.

The soldier's salute to a fa.llen brother, who died for a cause.

A cause for what?

Freedom?

Equality?

Justice?

No one knows what "cause" that soldier was fighting for.

Now every living moment of eve1y day won't be the same.

As she looks upon the mantel where she sees his beautiful face, with the medal, a deadly reminder of the horrors of war.

Every evening she'll set an extra plate at the dinner table, waiting for him.

From her home to yours, from the ghettos to the suburbs.

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Everyone knows, a soldier's final mission is coming home.

-*- *Orange

By: Elliou Robb The rest stop between Red and yellow Zesty and crisp It grabs your attention Fierce and ferocious It can't be ignored The color of a summer sunset And a simple traffic cone \.Vhether it's on a tree Or in the horizon Orange, Yellow with an attitude.

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Ludwig Van

By:RobynSl,an11011 Beethoven 1-ingsthrough the house as 111yfather's fingers run ovP.rthe piano keys playing Beethoven's famous Moonlighl. Sonata. I listen and wave to the music, unahle 10 slop from e11joyingit. The 1-emorseand silenr.P.1lu1so11gCl'eales, distm·bs and yet fasci11a1.esme. The song pulls me in hallway through and I make my way through the 1-everberating house to the piano room where my fathel' is playing. I open the shut doors wilh my eyes closed and da11ce lo the wondP.1-fulmusic.

11. .sings in my bones and plays through my heart, l'inging and singing in my soul.

AflP.1'nioments of hliss from Beethoven's great music, Moonlight Sonata ends and silence creeps into lhe air. I open my eyes lo find the du.sly piano empty, thP. door over the keys shut and locked, and the lights off. Il had been over live yP.ars since I had heard the beautiful music of Beethoven played by my talP.nted father.

Tl1e essence of the music still rings in rny head as I leave the ee1•ieroom and shut the door behi11d me. It was too lifeless in tl1P.~,without my fothP.r,it was too quiet. Until that moment of yearning for thP. music my fathe1· had played, I had stayP.d away from the room. My hand had not warmed the frosly <lool'knob for the live yea1'Smy father has bee11dead.

I stand outside lhe shut doo1·unable lo take another step lol'wal'd. Memory sweep., over me and now lhat I !,ave l'Copened tl1ejar of remembrance, I seem lo not want to leavP..

My heart bei;ins lo ache as my car:s cry lo hear the music once more. Sadness lakes over me knowing that so much has been lost. Then I tum around, !ouch tl1e frosty knoh once more anti yank open thP. door. Darkness sul'munds me and a silP.nce misundersl.ood ovel'takes me. l, however, in ange1; s3dness, and remo1·sP.all packaged in a single human wl'apper, igno1-ethe silence and 1un around the room turning on every light and opening every cm·lain lO lighten thP. room and bring happiness in.

Then [ take out the key that had for so long, 1-estedon a silver chain by my hea1t and I go nnd unlock the piano. I sit down just as my father had taught mP.years ago when I used to

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crawl onto the seal with my young legs, wanting to grow up and he just like him. I 1•estmy adamant lingers on the awaiting keys and a warmth of satisfaction cascades lhl'ough them lubricating t.heil'joinlS so that they slide meliculously with the 1·hy1hmof Moonlight Sonat.a, my fatl1er's favorile. Each heat rings tlmmgh the house and my head sways LO the side, a grin st.ret.cl1ed across my face. I close my eyes and can feel him sitting next lo me, rlaying with me once moi-e on this day, his birthday, and the anniversary of his untimely rassing.

Sensual

By:1J,felissa ii/organ The cool breeze dl'ifted across her skin, mingling with the heat that rose from her body. A bead of sweat trickled between her shoulder blades as she moved to the beat of the music. A light shown down on her tan skin as her arms swayed and her dark hair cascaded around her face. Her hips moved as if by nature to the beat of the drums, the sound of the nute, and the rhythm of her heritage. This was her connection to what she used to be, a way back lo her former life. In the dark room filled with anonymous faces she wasn't a lonely girl with broken dreams, but a Raqs Sharqi dancer, fierce and beautiful in the public's eyes.

- *- *-

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Bus Stop Lady

By:Emily Bw·bac/1 She waits.

Sining on the edge of a bench al a bus slop wailing for that yellow stallion lo car1y her to the orchcstr.1 concert Iler hair is a sad attempt at gray It belier resembles a bag of purple cotton candy It makes one wonder: Oid she reaHy buy I.hat in a bottle?

Her back is curved 1ike the shell of a Lurlle Bifocals make her eyes protrude Wide and gazing back lo times long past Large pearls accent her cars their weight lug at her lobes A large pearl necklace hugs her neck The folds of her skin bury the pearls making them nearly invisible Her blush is a worthless atlempt al looking young; those times arc past Lipstick is caked on her lips The multiple layers vainly try to cover up her age

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Her turquoise sweater embroidered wilh flowers engulfs her small frame A large brooch pulls at the threads Sagging like her body The elastic straps wrap under her feet pulling them taut in the space between her flat, worn pumps and the elastic her legs swell through Wrinkled and liver-spoued as her face '\\Tornwilh age and time Tired Iler skin has the same tiredness as her memory The memory that let her forget that the orchestra concert was two years ago So she sits at the bus slop AH dressed up, waiting Wailing for the bus to take her to the orchestra concert That will never come.

--*--*-

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I LoveYou By:KelseySatra Love lives in one's heart, where safety is conslant.

It knows no jealousy. fl isn't a hand to hold you back.

ILmakes your soul have wings, and your stomach have butterflies.

Everyone deserves lo have a part, even if only a mere pinch.

Love is the smile that tugs at the corners of your mouth when you see his handsome face.

The feeling of your heart skipping a beal when he answers, "Hello?"

Love is feeling you have the whole world in your hands.

It keeps you going through the needles of life, aiding, so you don 'l get poked. \Vith its power you can learn, to open your heart ....

And believe an,)'thing's possible. \Vhcn love laughs, it simply sounds like church bells chiming

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and baby birds chirping as the morning sun rises in the east.

Love has aqua eyes deep as the ocean, exploring endlessly.

It dreams about endless summer nights, dancing under the star-filled glittering sky.

Love enjoys walking on the beach, hand in hand, feeling the gentle waves and warm sand fill the space between one's toes.

Love is more than three words mumbled in a hurry.

It is maintained by devotion in the things we do for each other each and everyday.

Beneath the heat of the sun, in another's arms, is where this sensational feeling relaxes and flies away.

....,._._ 17

Depression

By.BaileyCappellano \\Tho are you, I scream in agony I'm running from something unknown LEAVE ME ALONE, I demand It won't It refuses It s1>rints toward me faster I trip and fall as it grasps my arm As its cold flesh connects with my own all I feel is death How I long for it yet fear it with all of my being I can only hear my subtle cry of anguish I can only smell the sweat beaming off my trembling body And I can only feel the steaming blood gush out of me The shadows drink my blood and swim into me in its place The monster becomes a part of me It's taking over my body, my soul, my will lo live It has overpowered me I'm drowning in the darkness as it engulfs everything around me I'm crying tears filled with the last hopes of a miracle The darkness has consumed me I have surrendered I have given up I look up and take my first and finaJ glance at the monster \Vhal I sec is

Me

-•-*18

I'm Sorry By: Kylelvfiller I'm sorry, Mom For what I've done, I drank and drove J killed your son.

I drive off on A Saturday night., I take the car \Vhile you and Dad fight.

I go to a party Vvith my friends, This night leads To dead ends.

Just a few drinks It won't hurt me.

I'm invincible Don't you see?

Not many drinks A can or two, I had more My head flew.

The party is over It is time to leave, As I drive home My car starts to weave.

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Halfwayhome The booze takes over, Run a red light My life is over.

I'm sorry, Mom For what I've done, I drank and drove I killed your son.

-*-•Trying To Burn Up Some Time In English

By: ChaseDingle As my eyes shift in and out of focus, my stomach begins to devour itself, slowly craving more than I know I'll be able to afford with the three dollars in my pocket.

I realize that not a single thought has passed through my head for five minutes.

Then I wonder

how long I could go without thinking.

- *- *-

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Erebus

By: MelissaMorgan You've got me You know it's strange how sometimes you get so confused. When the world begins to warp and wrap around you. When nothing is right and you begin lo suffocate in the chaos.

You're under my skin You're inside my head And I can't get you out

Youvegotme \.Vhen you've lost so much; when everything that is dear to you is gone, and your own soul seems to be missing; when only the chill wind keeps you company, and soon that will leave as well, there's re.ally nothing to live for.

You've taken things I own You've taken parts of me And I shouldn't have let you You've got me Life's got you stuck, that's what happens. You get so confused and nothing makes sense. You feel as if you're lost in the fight, a prisoner of war with muffled pleas to be let free. \:Vith your hands tied behind your back and your leg chained to the wall, you feel alone.

You've got me bound You've got me gagged And now ...

Now I can't get out

-*-*21

Hands

Ry: Megan 1¥illman I am lhe hands Wrapped around your pen Strong, velvet hamls Disturbe,I 011lyhy soft ripples I am each cell pulled together Tc, fonn a united nation \Vorking logethel' lo create A world wol'th living in

orthe llcsh

I am the h:m<ls Plump and voluptuous Kneading ,lough into lm~ad \Vi1l, a tender I.ouch ormagic Pmssing hcal'l and soul into Such a simple lask

I am lhc hands Cool and comforl.ing Spr'.iwlcd across youl' forehead On early moniings dl'enched with foar The hands that slide behind your neck Sending shiver-. 11pyour spine Arni down your hack l am the hands One lil'mly grasped around yom· wrisl The other slung back l\cady to strike I am each fingernail Digging into your skin Under your skin Prying il off

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l am the hands Wrapped around your pen Delirious and shaking Neurotic aml scared Hands thal would sluller if lhcy spoke I am each cell Ready to lel go To become its own nation l am 1.hehands Fim1lygripping cool, gray fire \Vhile pressing a Post· h onto tl1c fridge The same hands Fumbling With a knoh that won'l tum On a door 1hat won'l open Hands that can't guide And are only good for one thing I am the hands And my only regret. is that you had t.o see me Empty and lifeless

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Untitled

By;iffekiJaRivas Focused int.entJy As a substilulc teacher attempts To teach this foreign class I lry hard to keep Radical equations on my mind But lhc sunlight rays That peek through the window blinds Are penetrating my thoughts And opening up the dusty memory box That holds the treasures of summerlimc A seven-year-old girl Surfs through the air As her protective fatJ1cr Sits on the nea.a·bybench

Glancing Back and Fol'th

Between his daughter And tJ1eheadlines Of today's newspaper Her one care in Ilic world rsto fly higher \.VitJ1each new swing 'fo stay there forever In lhc subtle comfort or her neighborhood park Just as she is about to louch lhc

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stretched Out anns of the leafy green trees The bell rings And it is time to go home.

-•-*Alone By: RobynShannon

I cry for help, but no one listens I grab for release, hut nothing can be reached I listen for near footsteps, but none are heard I feel tears fall down my cheeks, but no one is there to see I wrap around myself looking for comfort, but none is given I sit in the shadows of darkness, but no light comes to save me I am nol heard, I can reach nolhing, I cannot see anylhing, and no one comes for me I am alone

- *-*-

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Ah.heimer's By:JJ1egl{utze/1 I could see it coming slowly taking little pieces from her fragile mind All seemed fine until one day she began to fade Soon she was seeing things, people They taunted her dark and empty world as the light began to fade She couldn't remember her past, her childhood All her memories seemed to vanish Iler life disappeared Then she couldn't remember me I had once been so importanL to her A loving hug could've brightened her day This was no longer the case Soon she slopped eating, stopped drinking It was like she was giving up Weeks passed and soon we got the call Our greaL gr'J.I1dmaHelen whom we loved and cared for so much was fading Her chest began to move faster her breath becoming r-Jspier with I.he strains of death weighing heavily upon her small chest Hospice came to comfort her

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to rekindle her Oame but nothing could be done to slop the dimming light and soon she was gone forever

~*- *Lile is ...

By: AshleySc!tncll Life is a posl card Always traveling but never first class Always getting stamped Handled by people you don'l know Never really hearing lhe whole story Never knowing anyone's true feelings Always getting half-facts never the whole truth You a1·ealways on display - being judged For some you're too fancy For some you're Loo plain You picLurc a place and wish you could go there A picture of mixed emotions - deceiving you Jealousy?

Excitement?

You arc on a journey Where your destiny will be decided To a deslinat.ion unknown

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Passion

By:DanielKatt Beads of detetmination roll down your face Jesting as you work The fiery sun tempts you to take a break You ignore them both Your weary body rolls along Feet aching as they pound The unrelenting asphalt That grabs your feet and refuses Lolet. them go But you will never Give up Countless hours Alone Just you and your ball Best friends Meticulously perfecting every movement Until it is Flawless You practice until even the street lamps won't pay allention Calling it a night only because you can no longer see But you will never Give up Some call it obsession Criticizing your work But only you know what it tmly is Love They lcll you it's just a game It is your Blood Your Flesh Your Spirit Your Soul It is your Life

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But secretly you think to yourself \IVhilcalone in your bed Is it worth it?

Or is it tl'uly a waste of precious time?

You scream back at your cruel thoughts Telling them that they are stupid Morons To leave you alone!

You step onto the pitch Immediately these ideas arc put to rest The grass blades are like powerful drugs Enticing you to join it in a dreamlike st.ate Your sprained ankle is miraculously healed Headache gone .lust minutes before Breathing was laborious But now air nows like The blood that is pounding throughout your body The ultimate Adrenaline rush A ball is lofted over your head An airplane about lo crash to the ground Like swallowing needles You draw in a deep breath As you dash to the ball No one in front of you but the menacing goalie He is the only thing between you and success Whose only ambition is to crush yours Nothing can stop )\OU now though Those hours alone Will not go to waste You plant your foct and swing your leg And you know it's perfect Suddenly a searing pain shoots through your ankle You feel as if you'll never be able to walk again Crippled

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Usdcss Lame As you lay on the grass in defeat you foci a IiIlle redeemed As lie is sent off lhc field But high fives grccl him For slopping you lhe1~ You hohblc t.o the edge Trying not lo show Weakness Hurl You must not lel tl1em know That lhcy have hurl you

You1·s:icrificc is not put to waste The shot is made And you have won An<l while gle:iming at the other learn \Vith a look of pity You can't hdp but think Lo yourself That it has p:iid off Because you never Gave up

- *- *-

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Friendship vs. the \Vonder Bra By:Elizabeth iUcClellan wearing a push-up bra is like having a great friendship caring and supportive both hugging sometimes a little too tighL betrayal is lefLby both marks and scars never leave friendship hooks itself together as girls do every morning security is what we seek finding a life long friend to hold you up in times of need or just everyday instances never letting you down is one support system you will always be able to depend on frritating and scratching a simple part oflifc every girl must endure personal information is being held though the time can be rinsed away all this and more arc what friends and the wonder bra arc for

-·-·31

Fear Itself

By: KelseyCrowder Fear lives in every person surging all the happiness from us Fear lives in a place where everyday in a dark, dingy alley small children dream of being dealt a scrap of food Fear lives in the fingertips of a father cradling his newborn baby It is a glass of spilled wine slowly creeping upon its prey eventually leaving a long lasting mark Fear laughs at the last breath of a living soul Fear is like a parasite it seeps inlo our minds and often times gets the best of us Fear dreams of a violent storm engulfing the specks we call ships Fear is everywhere But there is truly nothing to fear but fear itself

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Where is He? By:Ammula Torwirt

Herc I sit at the ceremony, no real pm·pose to be here at all. All of the seniors are graduating, but where is my brother? I know where he is. He is six feet under the cold, wet dirt because of someone else's addiction. He was just sitting at the light so innocently, and a pickup truck going 98 miles per hour slammed into the rear end of his car.

I hate the person who killed my best friend.

Jeremy was the person I ran to when someone was picking on me, and now, well, now he is gone. He is not on the stage where he needs to be. Someone is going to call his name and he won't rise and he won't go up those stairs, and he won't accept that diploma.

He worked so hard to be here today and he isn't here. All those hours and days he sat in those hard desks and chairs waiting for this very day.That drunk driver just had to slam into the back of his car, and thrust him out the front window of his '72 Chevelle that he worked hours on. I-le loved that car: He loved being alive, and now he's gone. Damn alcohol! Look what it did to my brother. Look what iL does to anyone, and everyone who ever tried it.

I wish that my brother could be here today to walk across that stage in his black cap and gown that still remain on a hanger in his closet. They will never ever be worn.

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Emotions By: Ellen Wilsofl

They are the ones lurking In the shadows of the unknown They arc the amount of love in the heart Of a loving mother They arc the secrets that you keep from the world Inside bouJed up until you can't contain them Anymore They arc the salty tears of death Lurking on the helpless They are the first cries of a child \\'hose flesh has broken on the cold concrete They travel with us into the depths of nothingness They show our feelings when no words can explain They are the rosy redness of our cheeks when love Strikes us For the fir.sttime They confuse us with their mischievous ways Some leave creases on our faces when we smile They are ..what get us through They are in the shadows of the unknown "They" arc Emotions

- *- *......

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Swing Hy:Sarah A. McCown Oftentimes, it's more than difficult to describe the foci of d:meing. Every movement the leader gives - the slightest pull of his fingers on hers - tells her exactly what lo do next.

A pull here, spin under. Pull across; it was a cross boc!y lead.

Dancing is <lancing, most people say. A plain hold - her anns held up and around his neck, his hands on her waist. To the untrained eye, it looks rel;itivcly normal, l>ut to one who has been on a rcul <lance noor, with a real pal'tner, it is n completely different sto1y. \Vith something that makes a differem;e in someone's life, there comes ahout this elaborate story al,out how marvelous it was to them. Uut this time it isn't. lt'sjust regular people living a rcgnl:ir life who discovered something more.

Annalise let her foot drift to the side, watching her slim reflection in th(: milTOt'S.Katriana, hcside het; was talking to Lilly, who stood c1uitea hit shorter than either of the younger girls.

Anna turned toward them, letting her frmnc(I hands drop to her si(lcs, het· long hlomle hair tied up :m<laway from her focc. ~It n~(111ircs a lot of ,liscipline." Kat set her chin in that legendary determined look of hers and only no(lde<l ut Lilly's evety comm(~nt and warning.

Anna and Kat had hccn b.11lroom,l:mcing under Lilly and Connor's insll·uction for a grand total of eight months, and were :1lrc:1dytraining for a competition only two d:1ys away.They were becoming rigidly determined, wishing for nothing else hut to d:mce and ,lance l'ight.

Lilly smiled as she wat.chc<ll>oth of the 1;,,jriswork with each other on their pieces. She had grown to know these girls well over lhe past fow months, and she knew that they had the talent to pull off cx:ictly what was nce(le<l.

The problem w:is not in their knowledge or 1:1lent,but

35

in their nerve~.

Both Anna and K:it were performers; they were both musically gifted and ha<ll,een down the road to presentation hcfore. Even Kat, who was rather thicker than Annu, und looked nothing like one expected a dancer to look like, had a silent kind of grace about her. She was so intensely dedicated that she had even l.c1,'Unsteadily losing the excess weight that had previously dmgged her down and kept her from executing a professional perfo1mance. Lilly only hoped they had the same dctmmination that had driven them this for out on a real dance floor.

Kat had never been so nervous in her lifo. She was chewing on something the entire flight, be it her pen cap, her nails, or the ring from her water bottle. Her feet felt numl, as they walked up the steps to the elegant hotel, her delicate costume dr-.iped over one arm.

Uoth Lilly and Anna could sense her discomfort. Out of all those competing from the studio, Kat was the last one Lilly would assume to get stage fright. The normally talkative blue-eyed brunette hadn't spoken a word to anyone since they'd left the studio.

The motley crew checked in, keeping their comments to themselves. Once Anna and Kat were in their room, Anna jumped on her.

"Katriana!" she ull but screamed, tossing a fringed pillow .1t her.

It did the trick, making Kat jump enough to pull her out of her reverie. "\Vhat?" she a.skcdquietly.

"What's the matter ·with yo\l?"

"I' m jUSl. . .. nervous. " Anna fell back onto the hcd she'd claimed as her own with a hea\'.}'sigh. "Kat.~ ~can we just get ready? I'd rather not talk."

"I think we got that notion."

Kat stopped from taking out her ball gown. "\Vhat now?"

36

"You haven't spoken to any ofus in ages, Katty."

Anna's shocking 1,<reeneyes held a great deal of unspoken concern.

"I don't think I'll do very well, that's all."

Anna's jaw dropped. "Kat ...you know every move!

You're even ahlc to execute them by yourself now - you never used to do that!"

"So?" Kat asked wearily, proppinr; herself against the counter. "That doesn't mean anything."

"It's not going to be any fairy talc ending," Anna said, her voice devoutly resolute, "hut it doesn't huve to be, not yet.

This is your first competition and, so for, anyway,you're doing fantastic."

"Not as good as you," Kat said dully. Images of the disappointed looks on her family's faces Oashcd through her mind. They hadn't hccn supportive of her decision to become a dance instructor rather than something else, something more professional. "\Veil, I won't argue," Anna joked, prodding her friend in the shoulder.

Kat smiled sheepishly. She so wanted Anna to be right, to prove to everyone that she had the talent to do this for the rest of her life, which was a long time - she was just fresh out of high school.

"C'mon. Let's go dancing."

Lilly wasn't particularly sure when it got so hot; she just knew that it had. lier seat in the stands surrounding the dance ffoor was a good one - she'd Le able to see evcrythini;, but that na1,'{,<ing foding was still there.just in the pit of her stomach. Anna was standing beside her dov.'11on the floor, her eyes dosed, making her look serene. Lillyhalf-wished that she had been tr:iined to find her calm like Anna so obviously had.

"Ladies and Gentlemcn."The lights dimmed a.~the judges took their places. "And now for the Waltz Newcomer's Division."

The couples were greeted onto the floor with

37

applause. Kat and Connor were Lheseventh COU(-'le out, seeming to glirle to their cho~cn sµot. Though it looked somewhat fake, K:1thad a smile pasted on ht:r t;1ce.Connor suid somcthins to her quietly, making Kat smile for real and nod ever so 5lightly.

Lilly prodded Anna in her shoulder. ~They're starting," she whispered harshly.

Anna's hright green eyes opened wearily to the dark surrounoings.

As the music bcg11n,so Jiu the dancers. Kat rd:1xerl slightly a~ .she stepped into the prosrcssive a goo<lstart was always important, ant! the foct that it had hccn executed 1u:rfoetly let Kat breathe just a little more. \Vhcn the gentle lune ended, applaust! erupted amund them. They howcd and curtsied, and flew off of the 11001:

Kat seemed LO be hursting with newfound energy.

"Anna, Anna! l didn't screw up!~ She did a little tl-virl, her elegant skirt forling out around her ankles.

"I saw,"Annu said with a grin. lier competition had gone great, :i.swell, earlier in the day.

"Well, ladies," Lilly sairl, standing hcsidc them, "the worst is ovc1: Do you think you ran go an<l have a goo<ltim,: at the lounging by the mini bar now?" Her face was cager for them to fulfill her silly fantasy of pampering herself the much talkr,rl.:1ho11troom.

Anna and Kat tossed each other a wry look hctween each other, then laughc,I. "The wor.st is over, Lill; Anna said, looking at Kat, ~but the dancing, I'd say, is far from it.• From the look in hoth the girl.,' eyes that neither of them would Le going back to live a lifi: they didn't want to live.

"So," Kat asked, entwining her arms in both Anna ant!

Lilly's as they descended from the Lallroom steps, "arc we coming back ncl!t ycal'?"They all laughed at her ea1,<crtone.

It was truly a rime to dan,:e.

-*-*38

Letting Go By: Krysta1l1angcrs The air is crisp and clean It feels so good to breathe in The ground is damp from the early morning dew but I don't care I'm sitting in the grass anyway The sun is just peeking over the horizon in a clear sky It's just me my notebook and my favorite pen My mind is completely empty and words are pouring out of my brain and my hand writes them in swift motions My body is completely relaxed so relaxed that I don't know how my hand is still writing My emotions swing with every sentence I write It feels so gl'eat to just write what I want with no restrictions no pressure and no stress The pages in my notebook keep filling [just can't stop writing l have so much bottled inside that everything starts streaming out I'm on an emotional rollercoastcr One second at the happiest moment and the next where all I want to do is cry The good things linger in my mind and the bad fade away as l relive them Time is racing by

39

seconds tum into minutes and minutes into hours but I don'L notice I'm in my own world without the restraint of lime The sun is up I am so emotionally drained from writing that I lay hack with the sun warming my face and drift off into a peaceful sleep

- *-*The Mother

By Ben Estrella She cries These creatures came from Her No respect Abuse She cries The are killing Her Slowly She grows Old Seen many springs Many more ahead \Viii they ever stop? \Vhcn they kill Her She can't come again Soon they will find out She Cries.

40

.lohn, a Marshmallow's Tale ByTylel' Lambley I wake up lo what I believe or hope is a sunny and peaceful morning. I can't tell, though. !l's h31-dto tell sometimes what it's like outside when you're stuck here in aisle five wilh fifty other Jumbo Colored Marshmallows.

Oh, I'm sorry. My name is .John. I want lo tell you something, but you must keep it a secl'et. The marshmallows lhat come out of a special factory actually have ear.s in them!

That's how I got my name. 'When I was created in this factory, I didn't have a name. Some child walked by my bag, and I heard the mothei· call out his name. I was drown to him. John seemed like the name that would fit me best. I'm two weeks old, and I'm due for spoiling in thirty-six more weeks. My main goal, however, is to live forever and get into the Guinness Book ol'World Records as the oldest marshmallow! This is my fifth day of sitting here in aisle five. I spent the first few days in the back stockroom of the supennal'ket. It was a gray and dull place tl1at gave me a sense ofloneliness and depression.

Many of us in here are talking, and we're guessing that we'll be leaving this place within the next three days.

This is my daily life. I sit here and try to look all pufiy and delicious to the humans. During the closing hom>i;of the supennarket, we marshmallows eilhel' catch some "i's" OI' chitchat about how our day was and what we hope will happen the next day. The chitchat is usually the same though.

"Oh, how was your day?" my good friend Tammy would question.

"Pretty well, I guess. I did the same thing as yestel'day," would reply Josh, another of my friends.

"Yeah, me too. I just looked as pulfy as I could, hut I still got no1l1ing rrom the humans. I thought pink was a color tliat was attractive! Am I not attractive?" would 1-espond Lynette.

"Of course you are!* I would promulgate lo her as she was holding back the tears of anxiety.

The sixth day on the shelf anives and I awake full of energy. This could be my bag's day. I mean, I feel as if I am at

41

my peak of puffiness! A f~,v customers go hy us wilh no luck.

This wo111a11 all of a sudde11 appeal's in front of us. She has a sP.:ir1:hi11g face. She looks as if she is going to find what she wa11ts,no mallel' what happens. The woman grahs lhe package next lo us. She begins to oxamine every little detail on the package. She gets the had news when she finds the pl'ice tag. "jAy Cl,ihuahua! iOuecaro!" she screams as she is realizing the expensive price of tl1ose marshmallows.

This might be our chanr.e. Ly11eueand Sonja scream out, "Go lo super•dupcr-extm-pufly mode! Now]~All of us take a deep b!'eath in, allowing for ou1·maximum potential puffiness. We use every ounce of strenglh in us lo l'ead1 lhat potential. The woman throws the package back on the shelf.

No, litemlly, she tlirows the package on the shelf. Our fellow marshmallows must have some scratches and scrapes fmm lhat c1·a.shla11dini;. She meanders down our aisle a little mo1·eand she seems to h:we an interest in our package. She snaffies our packase wilh a great amount of force. She twisls and turns our package while she examines it. We toss and twirl and llip anrl !lop all over lhe bag like nevei- hefore. It is a painful experience, but no1J1i11g close Lothe pain we feel as we make a smashins contacl. against tl1e hottom of 1.heshopping cart. It is something like a metal haseball bat smashing ag-Jinst your abdomen over and over again. After the pain subsides, there am cheers and a greal. feel ins of excilP-mentthroughout our package.

The first part of the exit of the supermarket is a ride of the famous conveyol' heh. It has a shiny black covering that sends a cool foeling throughout you!' "pulT." The speed of the belt seems a liule loo fast, but maybe it's the 1•ightspeed for other vegetables like tl1e Pean ul Bulter. \Ve are handled again and sent across a blinding red light followed by a high-pil;:hed and a1111oyinsbeeping sound. We are placed in a brown paper sack. Our package is placed at 1.helop of the sack, for squishing reasons, but we still cau't tell where we are b<Oing.

We are placed in some contraption that carries us away from 0111• previous home.

By the time we arrive at the woman's house, we al'e still tryini; to 1-ecoverfrom the hm1ali1yof the woman and clerk's

42

hands and the humping and jolLing experience<l in the journey to thP-house. \Ve are Laken into what seems like another climale-controlled area, but we have no clue where we are. \Ve are laken oul of the sack by what appears lo he a small child.

She smiles at us and says, "If only you did11't have lo be ealen.

You're all so hP.autiful! Mom, do we 1-eallyhave to cat Lhern?"

"Nicola, why are you talking lo the marshmallows? You k11owI.hat we're going lo eat I.hem in a few days anyways. IL's for your hi1·Lhdayparty; Nicola's mot.her responds.

"OK. I guess so. As long as I get lo choose which onP.s l want."

Whal are they going lo <loto us? This frightens all of us. We are placed in a cupboard and I.he door doses behind 11s. We are i11lotal dal'kness! I notice right befot'C the door shuls that it is light out. It doesn't fit right. There is a sense of confusion 1hroughout the package.

"So what .... are we supposed 10 go Losleep now?' questions Lynelle. "l'm still very awake.'

"I know whal:you mean, it's slill too eal'ly lo head off lo hcdt says Josh. "h's just too weird for me.~ Time passes for what seems foi·ever. The1-eis absolutely noll1ing to do in I.hecupboard. We talk and sleep, and talk and sleep, and whal else? We talk and sleep. We are bored out of our minds!

The cupboard door swings violently open one day as we are jusl. waking up aller a good sleep. \Ve al'e i;rabbed and wildly hul'led into a bag. We are off on another journey. We all wonder where we m·e going. Why are we leaving the climate cont.l'Olleda1-eafol' a region of space that is unfomilial' lo usl' IL jusl docsn 't make sense why they would do this.

There is a recognition of Nicola's voice, so there is a small sense of security in lhat, but thel'c are also a large 11umbe1·of oilier voices 1.hatare foreign lo us. \Ve keep "driving~ for what seems to be an etP-miLy.By I.he lime we reach our deslinal.ion, nighttime is approaching. a Mom, is tliis what Lheycall the gioeal: outdoo!'s?' Nicola asks.

"The Great Outdoo1-s?" Where did they get 1hat name? \Vhat's so grc~t about lhc out.doo1-s? I enjoyed my time in lhe .sopermarkel much more lhan I do now. I just don't know. We

43

arc ta.ken out of I.he plastic bag lhat holds us and are placed on some so1'1.of table with its legs connecled 10 iL We watch as, in the middle oflhe 11ighL,a hig burst of light appears that seems lo emit a lot of heal. My friends an<l I snuggle up with each olher and take in thP. wamith tJ1atis being sent to us. We are in heaven!

All of a sudden, our packas-e is ripped open. \Ve a!'e being grabbed out by the ha11dfuls. I end up in tlie same group with Tammy, hut Lynel.l.eand Josh are nowhere to be found.

Individually we al'e being picked up and placed on a stick. I :un third l.o go. A piercing pain <levelops .as a slick is jabbed tl1rough me. I can feel my life beginning to end al. lhis moment. I am placed in tlie fire. How crnel of these people l.o do this to such marshmallows. Why would they do this lo such wonderful ci-eatures as us? The li1-eis all righl. at first, hut once l beb-in to catch on lire, the pain ensues. l try screaming for help, but what is there to dol' Life is en<li11ghere and now.

All I know aft.er that is a greeting from a piece of a chocolate bar and gi-aham cracke1·s. Isn't this what they call a smore? I thought that I w.asgoing lo live forever! Out what nowl' My life is over! Goo<lhye lifo, or i11Nicola's family tern,s, Adtos amigos.

SP.eyou in marshmallow heavP.n someday!

-*-•.......

It's Saturday aftcn1oon ...

By:Dezy·Rmce It's Saturday al\crnoon, And you're not home.

I wonder where you arc, And where you have hccn.

It's been months since I've seen you, And I miss you.

It's Saturday aft,:moon, And you're nol home.

I wonder if you 're ok, And if you still need me.

I've sat and cried everyday you 'vc heen gone,

44

And I wonder if you'll ever come home.

It's Saturday al\emoon, And you're not home.

I wonder why you didn't say no, And if you had a chance would you take it back?

I've yet Lo hear from you, And I've ycLto see you.

It's Saturday aflcmoo11, And you're not home.

I wonder if I'll get a lcuer today, And if it'll he from you.

I opened the door, And there he stood.

It's Satui·day aflcmoon, And you 're not home.

I wonder what he's doing here, And why he looks so glum.

I asked if I could help him, And he quiclly replied, "Ma'am,your son was killed in combat."

It's Saturday afternoon, And you'l'e not home.

I wouder no more, And I know why.

I know you'll always be near, And you'll always wa1ch over m(~.

It's Saturday al\emoon, Aud you're not home . .-*.... )"-

45

Change Ry:'TyLur.dtke They cnlcr lhc gates and prepare for a new hcgi1111ing.

Most don't even co11sidcr lhc thout;hl of a chant;ed lifo, instead of ,;hangi11t;their lives, they change their looks. \Vorking out lo t;ain muscle mass.

Growing out facial hair.

This is onougli "change" for thc,111.

Tl,is will probaLly ho lhc only chance they will gel, lo change.

Bui. they don't l;1kcadvantage of lhat.

They leave the gal.cs the same person tl,cy were when tl,ey arrived.

Only 110w their hodics are muscular or dmhby, t..11tooc<lor bruised, faces arc hairy 01· scarred, h11tll1cy arc the same in lhc mim.l and luiarl, 110w 1:hal they arc out or incarccralion.

,.._, *- *.......

Fut(!

B_y: OliviaNgu_ye11 I sec him n~th her: They look so happy. M:iybe I should leave him alone and sto1• t:1lkinglo him, let him conccntrntc on his lifo. I should just end my fociings now, so that it can no longer hurl me anymore. If only I could. I should look away right now l,cfom he notices I.hut ~omcouc in the crowd is watching his every move.

I sec hci: She doesn't look very hajtpy. I won<lcr what .she is thinking of right now. Mayhc sh11hales m(,. l'vc heen in this room for so long, :m<Ishe hasn't laid her eyes on me for a second. Maybe I €lcservc to l,e h:,tcd.

46

They look happy togetJier. The perfect couple. He looks so in love with her; I sec a smile on his face every time I tum to take a peek. I can't bclii:ve he wouldn't even give me a look, or n simple "Hi". Do I deserve to be treated this way?

She really hates me. I said "Hi" to hor twice; she docsn 't show any emotions on her face, or even look at me.

I'm sure she saw my lips moving to say "1-li"to her. She continues to ignore me.

I sec him laughing at everything she says to him. I le looks really hapry when I don't exist in his world anymore. I should stay out of it forever. Things arc Lcttel' if they stayed this way. l~vcn though I'm hurting insiJc, seeing him happy with her will make me happy too. It hurts knowing that I'm not the one who's bringing a smile to his face but only the same smile can bring the warmth into my hemt.

I lmmpcJ into him.

I humped into her.

My heart skipped a heat. I looked at him. I opened my mouth to say a word to him, but nothing cam1: out. I closed my mouth shut. I swallowed hard; I can foci the lump in my throat. I tum arountl anti walk away from him, my heart heating r-<ipidlyagainst my chest. [ walked away from his lifo forever, knowing th:tt we were never meant to he.

1

foci her eyes upon me now, and I just keep walking, ignoring my tcdings. Looking hack would just tear me apart.

How did this happen this way? I :tlways thought our love would last but I gtw,s [ know now that nol.hing lasts fo1'Cvcr.

47

Close Friend

By:Alanna Nunn I once had a friend.

We were as dillcrent As cal and dog, But yet we were so alike.

As a small child, \Ve saw one another

Eve1yday.

But as we both grew into Young adults, Our lives began to get even More different, And we started to slowly Drift apart.

The many pictures remind me

or the friendship

we once had \\Then we were so innocent, Still playing with Ba.rbics, Still playing dress-up.

I miss what I once had.

Such a loving, caring person To call my best friend.

And I ask myself, How could I let someone so Important Slip out of my life?

- *- *48

Our Creator

By: Cliri.ssie Sc/iT1eider Who put the stars in the sky? \Vho gave the waters the calming blue? \Vho set the rainbow up on high?

And sprinkled the grass with morning dew? \.Vho hid the fawn with its dappled sides?

Who taught the salmon to swim the brooks?

Who buried gold in the heart of the earth?

Planted wood violets in shadowed corners?

Who told the ground hogs that spring has come?

Brought the buttermes from the cocoon?

Who put the song in the robins' heart?

Reflected the tides by the distant moon?

Who put the stars in the sky?

Who gave the waters the calming blue? \.Vho set the rainbow up on high?

And sprinkled the grass with morning dew? \.Vho hid the fawn with its dappled sides?

Who taught the salmon to swim the brooks?

Who buried gold in the heart of the earth?

Planted wood violets in shadowed comers? \.Vho told the ground hogs that spring has come?

Brought the butterflies from the cocoon? \.Vho put the song in the robins' heart?

Reflected the tides by the distant moon?

Who put the wonder in my mind?

Set off the joy bells within my soul?

Who gave the reason to even exist?

Made our mission and heaven a goal?

A chance of occurrence, a complete mystery?

There is a reason, if we only look.

49

Nature demands it, and so docs my heart.

There is only one answer, And only one GOD.

- *- *-.. lam IJ.y:Andrew Mnrti11ez

I am I he darkness in your room, I am lhe 11ighlmarcyou rush lo wake up from, I am scary.

I will make you scream. lo scream is lo what?

To mak(: a sounJ, A noise.

Oh no, l.osec you cower wilh fear As you shrivel up into a hall in a hl:11:kcneJ corner.

Your foars bring laugl1ler 1.0 me.

I yearn to sec tears, Stream ,low11your face, Like a liounJlcss river mcrgin11 wilh the folls of' horror.

You tliink you can, Youcan't.

Give up.

It's loo late.

You will never make iL You are a faiIUl'c.

I'm all you've got, Your mom and Jad aren't thc1·e, So just •1uit.

Who am I you say:' Nothing.

Nothi11gless A conscience.

- *- *_,, 50

Cruel lmny fly: MfldckmR.Kr.lier

It was P.wming, wam1 and alive wilh I.he sounds of crickels and cicarlas, slal'light <h'P.nchingher in all its beau1y.

From act'Oss the fleln he saw he,; dancing to so111P. su·ange celestial music that only she could hP.ai'. ll was pe:u:eful here and he had enjoyed it, this liP.ld,the wann b!'ce:r.e,and lhP. ligl11 fragrant perfume that dl'ifted from lhe Maguolia lree under which he sat; and had yel. lo have seen someonP. else. 13ut lo a11d behold here she was; fol' a time hP. watched and was r.onlcnl.ed. \Valr.hing lite light play off 1he pm'Celain skin, and her scarlet hair OultP.I'in the air likP.rose petals, gave II i111that impression of seren iLybeyond consciousness. ,\l111MIlike a fairytale he thought lo himself, almosL HP.sat for hours,jusl watching, sl.udying I.he way 1he airy <l1'P.ss Ooalerl, and al limes it ser.med she was weigh1.less. A lcall1er to be blown away in the wind. L\ut theu hP. became resl!P.ss, tired ol'just watching, heing 011lya spP.clalor in hP.r nightly ba!leL As far as hP. knew she was nol even aware 01'11isp1~sP.nce,a11dso he decided lo meet her.

I le Iifle<l himself from the spol unrler I.he Magnoli3 tree from which he l1a<lobserved her. She was still dancing in I.he strange manner as lie look 3 fcw steps toward he1: "I bet she's n dancer, a modP-1,nn angel. YP.s,an augel fallen from heaven, softer lhan I.he flnesl silk and sweel.er Lha11h1'P.alh,which is life itself. I bet she's s111a1'1 and witty, and knows :111 lhc social gt-aces of a pel'fect. rlcbul3nl. I hP.tshe's 1h11of lile a11d.shr. looks so happy," aml on and on he wr.nt like lhis. Fixali11ghis rl1·eamsonl.o hP.r like gossamP.1'wings, as closer he came.

U11tlhen he slopped, "I-low could som1mne like lhi.s love someone like me", lie thought to himsP.lf. And fo1·a mo111e111. he watched her, still dancing in I.he elephant grass, and from so111ewhP.1'C he could hP-al'music. Me lisle11e<lmore inte11tly; 1he music was sh·ange and beautiful, containing no woi•ds or si11gP.1;j11sl music. lnll·igued, hP. moved closP.1;his feet moving 1•hyi.l1111ically to the heal of a ghostly dmmmer. BP.fore lie knP.w what he was doing, he was there da11cing beside her.

They had no sense of time or space,jusl a feP.ling of ovenvllP.lming joy, and he did not know whem it came from.

51

Tl1en she stopped and looked al hirn and smiled, then she was d3ncing again. ~Hello, what's your name?" he 3.skerl, rcmemhering his inlel'est in lhis gil'I. She just smiled and continued lo dance lo the d1•u111mc1·.

"Please, tell me your name," he oskerl ag-Jin, 3fraid she dirl uot hear him. And again she smiled and continued lier dance.

"Well, whel'e ai-e you from ll1eni'" he said. She l.ook his hands and smiled and danced. "Do you live around heret he snirl, looking he1· in the eye. Something was nol: 1·igl1there, he knP.w it, mayhe she dirl nol. speak English. ~wo whonst du?" he tl'ied, she just smilerl. So he tl'ied again "Bonjour, ca va?" and again no reply, "Konichiwa, Ni-hau, IIola?" he tried but each lime he wns met with only the beautiful smile and mom dancing.

He was about fed up wil.h this gii•I;he was foll of frustration and confusion when lie thought he would give it one last t1y. He hrought his l1a11dsin front of him and motioned, ~Hello" he said.

The gid stopped and watcher!, "Hello" she said mimicking the motion. "Is that what you've been tiying to say all tfiis time?" 8he said while signing. Hel' speech was slul'rcd and soil, hut she made perfo<:t.sense. She was <leaf,he thought, but it didn't m3lle1; 1l1iscouldn't phase lier beauty.

They d3nced fot· hours, now enjoying each othei·'s compi111y.~so how long have you heen in the progrnmt she asked, signing while she spoke. He looked up and saw the tiny timer projecling the time he had been in the program, ~Too long," he said, then tl1e images of the field faded along wilh t.he lovely mystery girl. Ile look off the helmet 311(1switched off the program, then went around heh ind the console. He had hee11 in the program too long; it would take a d:iy to repail' lhe damage to lhe wil'es. A day hack iu re3lity, a day back amongst tl1e concrete and ll1e stcl'ile e11vironme11t,this was a thought he could hardly hear.

I-le was hungiy; he'd been in cyberspace fo1·a week, and .so he ate and hega.i1work 011 repairing the expensive equipment. The sweet smell of the magnolia tree was now 1-eplaccd hy filtered nir and anliseplic. He hated the gioeyof the

52

city, iLwas so depressing, he hated earlh and opened a hook: National Geographic 2000. Ile looked at the animals and places ancl wondel'ecl if it had hcen a belle!' place, and what woulo it. be like to dance in real elephant gr.iss with the mystery girl.

The nexl day he woke up and slipped on tlie helmet The SCt';!encame up and he lypcd in l1is destination, his escape from the gi-ey cell. \Vhen he came to the progt'3Jll he logged in, and there she was, just as he had left her. Silky red hail', porcelain skin, dress reOecling the moonlight., on lhe air was tJ1esweet smell of lhe magnolia ll·ee. "l want Lomeet you," she signed afier a while.

"But, I'm risht hel'e,n he said, a bit confused.

"No, I want to meet lhc l'eal you; she said.

He ltesilatcd for a momenL She l'eally wanL~lo meet me, he lhoughL Finally he consented, they exchanged infor111ation aud logged olT. He took off the lielmet and checked the dock, Hb'.iOam. II: had only hcen a few hours. He gol up and showered; no one had ever wanted lo meel: in J'Cl'SOII.He combed his hair and put on some good clothes and clteckcd the computer log fol' her address; he didn't want to be late.

He gl'abbed a hlank Minnie-Disk and burned 1.hcco· ordinance, and then he look the chip and went lo his cai·. It ha<l heen a while since he had used il last, bul as an old saying went it.was like hootins up a computer you just had 10 seL on and go. He slipped in the Mi11nie-Diska11d1he console lit up in front of him, and olf he went. The autopilot weaved in and out of U'3ffic t.lll'oush Lhecities' labyrinth streels, and he wondered what it had hecn like heforc it became a mel.mpolis.

A few mome11tslater he was I.here; he slipped tJie l\'linnie-Disk into his pocket as he knocked on her aparlment doo1·.

"Please enter," came the monotone voice of her .security system, .so he stepped inside. It was nice lor an ap:ll'lme111, same slel'ile melal counlnrs, same hard Ooor, hut nice. From a hallway came a girl in a wheel cl1ai1;she was young and frail.

A breatJ1ing lube was connecled al her throat, a11dher eyes we1•edull. lfor hair was lhin an<I ii. was obvious tliat shn had suffered from the plague.

"I'm here Losee the gi1·lfrom progmm 1491-/\." he said.

Site 1ypcd somP.lhing quickly on a hoa1'CIi11fl-0111 .of he1:

53

~1nin sl1et 1-eplied a soft 111ullle,Ivoice. I le looked i11 disheliel; he kuew thal people could alter !heir appearances hul how could she rnn tl1e program? I !er Jingel's flnUel'ed, "J\1-e you the hoy I've heP.n dancing with all !liese nigh1s?" he,• voice hox said. But it was loo mud, fol' hiu,, loo mud, lo seP. he,; loo mud, lo m111e111ber reality. I le !urned an,I lefl, hack lo his hack lo his €'onsole, back l.o lhc sanclua1y or cyher space. l10111e, 11<> slipped 011 tfie hP.huel and angled for tlie ne:i,.est slJ•e:1111 ol' infomwl.io11,when he got on lie let. hi111selfget carl'ied away.

I le walched in awi!, ;is people changed their lrue physical fol'ms i11to~Cyhcl' hei11gs"so111P, l111man,some not Co1Ter.1.i11g 1J1is, and changing !hat, uni.ii I.he true person w.is so encrypted :m,ong tlie ones an<l 1.eros that it woold take yeai·s to liud them, He calle<I 11plite magnoli:i lree hut all l,c could smell was tl,e stc1•ileantisept.ic; lhen he ll'ied the elephant {,rrass,hut all he c<>uldJeel was the chair he sat in, I le call,;,<!up images hut foreign, and or himself mid his friends; 1hey wcm fa111ilia1; all he could think of was tl1e 1,'11'1 hP.had danced witli. lie couldn't e11joylhis pamdise any lo11ger;tl1e imagf! of her lm,;, self haunted hi111.She had lo live in the real wo.-lrl eve1y day, lie thought. So he logged oil; shut down the program, took off the he Imel, a11,Iwonde!'ed what lie mally looked like.

-*-*-

54

\Vhat ls Freedom?

By:MarenVik The silent, deep breathing of Lady Liberty gently caressing inlo a wave Thirteen alternating red and while stripes with Fifty white stars in a fidd of sapphire blue.

The letters lo the editor Combating differing opinions on a Congressional bill lo reform Social Security.

The resonating ring of the swaying liberty bell Audible on every Philadelphia street corner.

The Sunday sermon of a preacher Speaking of the eternal grace that beats within the Hearl of faith.

The outstretched wings of a bald eagle soaring amongst the Abundance of the transparent blue sky that Grazes the peaks of the Rockies.

The polling place on Election Day Drowning in ballots begging to be counLed and Reels of, "I VOTED TODAY!" stickers.

The harmoni:ting voices of an entire stadium Singing the National Anthem a cappella Prior to the first pitch of a baseball game.

These arc jusl false realities.

Mirrors on the wall showing us what we wanl

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To see. Facades blinding our eyes and noise Deafening our ears from a reflection of the past Blocking images our mind refuses to process Preventing nightmares only a true witness to freedom Experiences.

Freedom is a sacrifice Disregarding selfish ties to one's life Preparing the soul to say farewell to this world, and Willingly walk unquestioningly into the unknown.

Hendezvous with destiny Ignore conflicting consciences Defy human instincts Die. But the things we sense Lo be associated with Freedom have merit, too, for the Sacrifice permitted their existence, with the Hope that the price of freedom would buy Peace, joy, and life.

Living in Death By: C/1ris1iruz Coplan

1yler Tardy more popular in death 1ha11in seve11tcc11years ofliving those who hated him hdore have become his best friends I foci son:y for !hose whose only way of gel.ling al.lcntion is l,y daiming him as one of their own

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hut that's flne this poem is not for them it is not about selfishness hut about grief it is nol for them but for Tyler Tyler sevcnl.cen goofy loud at times but always trustworthy obnoxious annoying but loveable and cud<lly you were my brother, lover, hcst friend all wrapped into one we woul<llaugh and cry together, then light like only siblings can then kiss and make up you died ma<l al me for that I'm sorry for one week we didn't talk to each other r was going to apologize the <layI fonnJ out

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yon taugfil.me a fml'<llesson to never stay mad you always lol<lme not lo light ovc1· stupid stuff I should have lisrcnetl l,u L I diJn 't tJu,y told us that Monday <luring second fH!riod I (lidn'L hdicvc it.

I coul<l11't.bcliev(, it

not Tyler energetic,

fun-loving Tyler

I crier!

I don't: cry 110Lin fro11Lof people but. I cried for you

Lecause f love you

I was11't alone t..hcrewere mom tears .shed tI1.atday th:111any other you were Liu,lirsl dc,1lh i l,arl ever really had lo <lcalwitl, f didn't know wl,at to do it's hard to he st.ro11g when ,lcaling with something so di fl'icult

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l went lo your (imeral so did almost everyone else in the school even lhe principal 11,opc you were lookiug down walchi11g us laughi11g at us for crying over you I know you'd want us lo be happy but it's ha1·d we miss you we love you I love you

Lend Me Some

Happy

By:1risliLeifen

Mydays al'e full of Sad Happy l rai·clysee I always sec you smile Could you lend I lappy to mei'

1'111 nol. asking for a lifol.imc Ju sl. a <foyor l.wo

A liU.lchit ol' time So I c;m say I'm Happy loo I swear to soak it up There's no way that I'd waste it I'd enjoy cvc1y minute

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Until I could practically tasle i1 lfappy is something you clu!rish Tl,is I know is true I promise lo do my hcsl To give some I lappy hack to you Collateral you s:1yyou ncc,I? Well here, lake my !wart Just. pul ii so111(~wl1crc sale Don'l lcl. ii.fall apa1°l I know iL':-already laltel'ed Mere and tJicre it's lorn But. it's all l have lo give So please accepl it though it's wom So for now we'll have some f'un We'll have a Ha1•1•yday And if things go r<:allywell With you, I may li1l. my heal't stay

- *- *These Tea1-s By:Andrew ;lfartinez Why do these tears fall from my eyes?

Why did you leave me?

Why did you die?

1 miss you so much, I wait and stare.

To rot and die, rjust don l care.

All of this pain and all these (ears,

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I can t live with out you near.

Please tell God from heaven above "You took my mom. the one I loved."

Why did this happen to a person like me?

My life was so perfect, So happy and free.

I II try to be brave and watch over Dad, Now that you re gone, he IIbe very sad.

Why do these tears fall from my eyes'!

I never got to say ... I love you... goodbye.

Cheesecake By:Amy Endrulat 1 3/4 cups finely crushed graham crackel's the crumbly crusl mixed with lhe smooth, cheesy texture of the 12" circle 114cup finelychorped \'l:llnulS

in the end it will plea.sc you with all the har,l wot'k put inlo it

112tsp. gt'ounJ cinnamon chocolate, marble, New York style, so many to choose from 1/2 cup butter, melted

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Liu:r:rr:amy ofi:whi1.c circle lille,I wil:hcalorii,s

3 8-oz, pkgs. cn,:im cheese cold and l'icl1 smooth anti crcmny 1 r:up sugar

1folical.ca111Ifragile sweet 311(1 son.

2 tbsp. all-p1111iosc flour so delcclablc so vanilla

I Lsp. vanilla wail.ing lo In, 1:al.en fht it OJ' llOI.

2 cgg.s slrawhcl'l'ics, d1r:n·ies, bluchcrl'ies aJ1ls color l.o your cheesecake 1 cggyolk golden hrow11cnisl. crmnlilc.s in your mouth

1//i cup milk the r.ool, smoolh i-exlurc Ll1almelts i11your mouth

- *- *62

sw<:ct.

Hope

By:AshleyScltnell Hope may be seen As a small flower that peaks lhrough lhc snow Or the sun lhat shallcrs the looming fog The symbol of hope is endless Hope is life Always lhcre Though hidden at times It's just hard to sec The light of hope pierces lhc darkness Times may seem lough But you'll get lhrough Hope is kept alive by an inner strength Find the strength inside and a calmness resides Tomorrow is brighter because Hope is found in Lhc dreams of the future Despite all thal has happened You still have hope You st.ill believe in yourself People do nol live because lhey are chasing hope People have hope because lhcy live

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Peace

By:JustinSpilker Peace is in lhe air It pervades nature And soothes her bustling soul It eludes our grasp Because where people are Peace cannot reside Instead it finds solace In the wide open sky Amongst lhc clouds Comforting its heart that we bruised In tranquil mountain lakes And in the lush foreslS of the earth Il overshadows the world But remains out of reach Ever present, lrying to draw us in Bul it eludes our grasp .Because where people arc Peace cannot reside We humans cannot achieve its Perfect tranquility

-•-*......

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The House Ncx.l Door By: Janine Gleason Our house was beautiful: white with detaih~d windows, and a huge backyard with the gi·cencst grass around.

The palio was outrageou:;ly spacious.

It provided m,~with a quiet place to enjoy the sounds of nalul'c.

Our garden gave hil'th tu beautiful, seen I filled flowct'S and dclicio11slyplump vegetables.

Buttcr!lies and hummingbirds frequently gave us the pleasure of a hrief visit, which lcll us happy wilh delight.

But the beauty of our hom1\, was suffocated hy the empty house next doot~ Every lime I walked by, 1 felt wave:; of fca1·pass lhrough me, like fine needles Lhl'ough a piece of silk.

The house seemed lo he p11llingat me wilh hands ol' lhc (lccaying ,lead.

The ba1;kwall was missing, exposini; lhc ho1T01'story wi1!1in.

Knives, chains, hooks, anti saws, hung along the walls, clauc1·ingas the wind passed thl'ough.

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Underneath, where the hascment lay, were heaps of hones and skulls.

ALnigh I:, as I lay in my beil,

I heard noises, and saw shat.lows tJiaLgave me constant night.man~•• Thal: house, although wilhoul occupanl~. was a living, pulsing thing, thal: gives me the creeps, still to this day.

The house nexl door.

On How to Be a Good "Star" Stalker

By:1ylerLamhley The art of stalking others is one of the hanlcst jol>s to do. It.could either be a hobby or a lifestyle, whichever you prefer. You could do it individually or for ~others." According to the \:Vebstcr's New Worl<lCollege Dictionary, the word st.alk means "to follow or pursue (another person) persistently in a harnssing and, typically, obsessive way.' Stalking has been around for ages, but it became mainstream in about the time of Elvis and Mru·ilyn Monroe. Ever since then, stalking has been a part of our society, especially in Hollywood, California. If on,: chooses to become a stalker, many steps need Lo be taken to be for successful.

Once th(: decision is made to take up stalking, the flrst choice is whom you woul<llik,: to stalk. This "specimen" must meet cerl.ain cl'itcria based on their popularity and you!' exp€:rience. If it were your first time out,you woulrl probahly want to select someone who's an

66

up-and-coming star and who hasn't reached his or her full potential yet. Some examples of this arc Hilary Duff, Clay Aiken, and Carson Daly. These arc a few stars who arc mainly known to one demographic of the American Public, which tends to be the teenagers and adults in thcil' twenties.

If you've been in the business for a while, you might be able to move up to the ever-famous movie and music stars. These stars tend to have higher amounts of security around them, so you need to l,e extra careful. Some of these stars include George Clooncy, Julia Roberts, and Justin Timberlake. The star you choose is all up to you, but choose wisdy. You must have the commitment to continue through the stalking of whomever you choose; otherwise it will prove to be a failure. There is also other crilel'ion to consider in the selection process, including hair color, height, weight, gender, etc., but that is mainly hased off of your preference. Once the "specimen" is found, however, the fun truly l,egins.

The next step to your success as a stalker is the need for th,~ right equipment. The necessary prodll(:ts ru·e usually very priey, so thcf1: needs to l,e a source of funds for the pun:hase of your supplies. Whether it be of a legal or illegal source is up to you. There are five it.ems that arc necessary for any stalker, whomever they should be stalking. The first is a rc11llyexpensive pair of night-vision goggles. The late night hours pl'ovc to he very impoi'tant in the lives of the stars and stalkers and th,: latter of the two shouldn't have to miss anything about the first one's late night activities.

Binoculars arc another important it.cm for the stalker. \Vhen one is stalking in public, they usually need tu be far aw·<1y from the star in order to gel a good look at them, which requires the use of binoculars. A high ·powered lens camera is the third item in the a1'Senal. [t ensures the keeping of other's memories for yourself. Once the camera begins taking those priceless photographs, the finishe,I product becomes hctter because you have your own personal memories of what actually happened during your

67

time out in the fiel<l. A digital camcorder is also important, for the papara.izi's use; they hold the sam(~purpose as 1hc cam(:ra for the stalkc1: A n~ally nice, concealing pair of sunglasses might also he imperative for hiding your identity.

A really expensive, fancy pair of Oakley sunglasses arc not only a stcreo1y1,ica!view of a ~Californian," lessening your chances of getting caught, bui: also hide your eyes to the fullest extent. These five ii ems arc nol everything that. you'll need to be successful in your days in the field, l>ut.they are the five that are necessary for success to even be possible.

The next step in the process is obtaining a new identity. You must never let your aclual identity he known or else it is doomed for failure. The process lo get a new identiiy might he a lengthy process, and .a little illegal, but the uses of it arc endless. You must change your entire appearance to ensure safety. Hair dye, color contacts, t:mning, extra piercings, bleaching your teeth, and mayhc a whole new warrlrobe might be in the works to ~,'uarantec your safely fmm the others. In the worst-case scenario, if your ~identity" were to be discov(~rcd,you <:ouldalways go back to your ori~inal self and continue the stalking.

The final step to your success in stalking is as easy as one word: location. Your "specimen~ is one who is fo!'ced to be accustomed with their surroundings, to ensure their safety, so you must be better th:m that. The schedules of some stars arc usually disclosed to the public, even a few ,lays in advance, so sl:udy it carefully. This might l'equirc that you go and st11keout the area to fiml your best areas lo hide, but still be able to be in view of the slar. \Vhcn studying your surmundings, 1:akcnotes of what is nonnal to the area, including placement of cert11initems, like light posts, trees, and parking meters. You must be able to L>lcnd in with your sun·oundings, whether it's hiding in trees or just looking "touristy" in a large !,'T011pof people. The locations that you choose to stalk others from need to b(~ the best. in order to guarantee: your safety.

Now tftat we've leumed the basit:s of how l.o he lhc best stalker that yon can, it's up to you Lopour your

68

heart and soul into the project. The choice of becoming a stalker is a decision that will affect everything for the rest of your life. It's a daunting but fun career choice. Once that decision is made, it's something that you won't regret for eternity.

Whal II?

By:Dez.yBruce What if? \\lh:it if it never snowed? \¥hat if the 1·ainnever foll, Or even if the sun never shone?

"What if?

Wltat if?

Wl1al:if you could understand everyone imd everyone rould understand yon? \Vhat if men understood women, 01' even if women unrlcrstoorl men?

What if? '..Vhal if?

Whal if mammals l'Uled t.he world and amphibians ruled the unive1-se?

What if humans could speak animal, Or even if animals could speak human?

What ii? \V11atii? \V11atif the clouds were on the ground anrl the oceans were in the sky?

What if the sky was green, Or even if lhe r;ross was blue~ \Vhat if?

- *-*69

Love or Death By: ChrissieScli11cider Did you ever love someone, but you knew they didn't care?

Did you ever feel like crying, but you knew you would get nowhere?

Do you look into their hearts, and wish that you were there?

Did you watch them walk away, not wanting them to go, whispering, ~ [ love you," but never letting them know?

You cry all night in misery, You almost go insane.

There is nothing in this whole wide world that causes so much pain. lfl could choose between love or death, I think I'd r.ither die.

Love is fun, but it hurts so much.

The price you pay is high.

So rsay don't fall in love, you will get hurt before it's through.

You see my friend, I ought to know Because I fell in love with you.

- *- *-

70

Paper Skin

By:AmberKniglit Please don't t.ouch me, For my skin is made of papea· That creases, folds with every move I make

The most tender embrace Or softest caress Will cause me to crumble, Crushed by the weight Of aflection Please speak softly, For my ears arc hollow, Amplifying even the sound of my heartbeat Every angry scream, Everycallous criticism Tumbles around inside Until my head throh.s with the spiteful rhythm Please don't tell me horror stories, For I will dream dreadful nightmares That plague my pleasant rest, my only privacy

Myshrieks of fright Will rip the peace of night And scatter its silence, Making my heart pound wildly, Makingmy cars bleed Please don't make me cry, For sorrow brings unquenchable rivers of tears, Burning my skin from intensity

My face grows hot and flushed As the burdensome fountain !lows

71

Not offering consolation Bul leaving me wl)ary and worn !'lease rlon 't make me laugh, For laughter causes giduincss That promotes poor j udgm"n l, Thoughtless frivol ily And if this giggling allots No time for thoughL, Th"n what if I fo1-gctl:o breathe?

Or let slip the events Stored carefully within my memory?

I could easily forge!. myself; The person I've strived lo define, My principles - my 1hougl1L,;- all numhed By this consuming conseiousness And what if you can make me smile, Draw me out from safe within my mind? l might develop a fondues., for The wayyour 111111101'makes me foci Please do11'l lalk to me, For, if'you do, you may discover My cleepesl lhouglits, exposing ml) And the soul I desperately hide And if you find no interest in me, You'll lurn your hack without a word Step on me like your sha,low, Forget me forevermore

Pica.sodou 'l look al me, for you'll not like whal. you see - Ugly,geeky, plain Or comple1.dy overlook This small, .strange Oowcr

72

Blossoming amidst full-bloom roses Please don't come near me, For we might. hccomc friends 01; if not conlcnl: with that, Grow closer to each 01hcr still 1 can't be near you And risk falling into love That will most likely fade What if we grew apart?

Our friendship would be destroyed, Thinterl hy deeper emotion \,Vhat ii' I loved you But you folt nothing for me? \,Vliat a wretched road il is Thal ends at confusion and heartl,rcak Please rlon'I break my heart, For it is marlc of glass, Delicate to touch

ff I fall iu love, My hcarl could easily break, Shallcrcrl mercilessly, Held fast only hy my faith, My l,ope for fa,,tlnngjoy

rea11'l let you

in, Lei: you sec me as l am, Though I wisli I could My isolation i\ sclf-inllicted hurrlcn is, For love frigl,tens me \Vith it~ (:vcr-looming loss

73

So r<:gretfully l l>uilrl lhis wall Sturdy arournl my hcarl, Shidrling it from lov<: I fod this wall will <:verstand Though I pray that ii will fall

- *-*Dream By: Lauren Wolterman

The silhouette against the dark sunrise The picturesque azure background Tells him morning is near.

Seagulls pounding overhead He becomes lazy His memo1:r runs amuck.

The rainbow sunrise Incorporates lavender, raspberry, and cyan He has never seen anything so beautiful A tremendous morning.

The sun reflects in his eyes And the tranquil waters of the ocean. dreaming Is his remedy

Continuous

74

Happenstance

By:SaraliA. McCown Waking up, can't find the snooze so I just sleep in Everyday's a worse one than the day before Frustrated, complicated, r.an you make a clilTerence?

Well, the phone rings, I get up, and i,erk up at the sound of hello You're makin' such a dilforcnce, can I even find interference That I can use against you?

You're breakin' up my motives and I don't think I can show it To the world You're my emptiness You're my life You're my confidence You are my surprise You're my hopelessness You'l'c my redeeming love You're my happenstance It's you I'm thin kin' of There's a delay on the subway, I'm tired now and cranky They're pushing and shoving just to try to get on hoard I miss 1.hcdoors barely by an inch So 1 stand there, just fuming, alone on the abandoned deck You make such a difference Ly the kiss that you're givin I can't breathe You don't leave me on the subway all alone hy the train You make me live You're my treacherous You're my heart You're my honesty You arc my disguise

75

You're my abjectness You're my llying dream You're my destiny It's you I'm dreamin' of' I come home, had a bad day My boss thought I was in a mad way I'm so near On the verge of leai'S Bui.you stand there, smiling Suddenly, I'm not frightened Cause you're the one 1:hatseems lo care In the light

It's the serendipity It's the love that we need It's the time you've d1erished me That I've spenL lovin' you It's the caring time to time It's the perfect Liming The surprise That I need

I need you You're lhe one I run l.o The one I've dung Lo The one I love You're my ha1>penslance

- *- *-

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Death of the Soldiers By:Amanda Torwirt \Valking on the beaches of Nonnandy, Emotions were so strong, Thinking l,ack to June 6t1•of '44, The day that things went wrong.

The weather was rough, The wind had spun, The rain blew hard, But the war had begun.

It had to be fought, \.Vith all their might, No one gave up, Not without a fight.

Their bodies were mangled on the shore, Crowding the blood-splattered beach, Limbs and torsos everywhere, Safety was out of reach.

Bullet.~and shrapnel far and wide, Showering the t:,'l'ound, Boals were sinking with corpses aboard, No life could he found.

Days went by, Hundreds died, Families lost their ones, So many mothers cried.

Now I think about how things were, For those brave men of war, You should always remember in your heart, What those men stood for.

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Murdered Untouched

ByTrisli Leifert Of the detriment you've caused There is no physical lracc Nol.hing but the tears Falling silently down my face I'm down here on my knees I see your hand held out Through the haze of my wel eyes And regret now so devout Your hand is free of color Other than your own Not a blotch of crimson Your cover still not blown You reached into my chest Strangled rny heart to its last beat Yet your hands are clean And I've fallen from my feet No one knows it happened Not even you,just me And I know I'm not mistaken Despite what I don't see Now your guilt-free hand glistens After wiping my dolorous cheek And once again you 're made the hero I've gone back to being meek

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Flower

By AshleyKorb A daisy in an open field Dances upon the sun Sparkles in lhe morning dew The lily gliding upon a leaf As fish swim around in awe Of Lhe beau Ly of the flower

The lilac spreads across the fence \:Vith liltle purple bulbs exploding ll smells like a day after the rain A rose slands strong in a beautiful vase with a note thal says I love you; it's beautiful in whatever colors lhey take.

Echoes /Jy:DerekO.fodirii1wa "Eyes aimed l,igh while the moon hanalts low..

Gohlcl of nim, full bucket of Crown .....

Eyes aimed high while the moon hangs low .....

Just an cd,ooo, .lust an echooo .........

The blood was now trailing over the gaping wound on my head, and congealing slowlyas I struggled to breathe.

The door, my (loor, half open, about as far as l c.111 &'CLit, and with the smoke bellowing in my face aml seizing the oxygen from my lungs in a nauseating manner, I inched my wayout of my seat with what ounces of strength I still had in my I.tatteredhotly.In my arms, shined shrapnel ofjaggcJ

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glass fmm the passenger windo,v. On my shirt, the residue of <lark hlood flowed from the jagged wounds in my mouth. l couldn't: 1hink. [ eou!<ln't slow down in my shock-endued freni.y of deep pain and panic. My mind coul<l11'Lendure what was going on, wh;itjust happ<:ncd, and for a while afterwards as I !'aid there partially mulilated physic:illy and mentally the 1·adio played, and played in a menacingly cruel anti mocking manner. "!~yes aimed high while the moon l1angs low .. _ Goblet of rum, full lmeket of Crown .....

Eyes aimed high while the moo11hangs low ...

Just an echooo, Just an echooo .. _.."

I bcg-.in1.0scl'eam carelessly into the air .as my woms became messenger pigeons caught in .a hurricane sky of car alal'ms, screams and thal: damned r:arlio. Hopefully somebody of use and authority would hear the {)uucring of its wings and the desperate messages attached lo it as I screamed aimlessly for help for anyhody,somebody. I couldn't walk, and with the strength knocked out of me [ hcgan lo sec this moment like it could l.)c my last. Finally, ancr some time, I was coming to my senses, .and as I looked around still shouting for help l Legan to sec the swam\ of pedestrians surrounding the accident. They gasped in horror at the sight of bloody scats and t wi.sted metal. I could hear them, Lut had a hard time doing so over the racket of that taumi11g radio, with the tape skipping back Lo the same four lines in an aggravation manner.

"Eyes .aimed high while the moon hangs low ...

Goblet of rum, full bucket of Crown,_ ... l~yes .aimed high whilr. the moon hangs low ... .rust an cchooo, Just an echooo ..... " As my mind made a .steady I.anding back Loearth frorn it's previously dark anrl chaotic galaxy of 1>anir.,I began Lohear what everyone was saying and notice the flashing

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red lights that had sun'Ounded my sight were that of an ambulance and a few police vehicles surrounding the sight of the wreck. It was just then that l saw it, and, to my own shame, that I began lo reali1.cthe full impact of what had really jusl happened. ~gycs aimed high while the moon hangs low ...

Goblet of nim, full bucket of Crown .....

Eyes aimed high while the moon hangs low ...

Just an echooo, Just an cchooo ..... " There it was being dragged away and into the ambulance; a black, 5 foot 9 inch body bag, still deadly as if a human body wasn't in it.

"Jake." l thought to myself. "Jake! Jesus Christ Jake!"

I realized what was in that body bag, his body. My brother, .lake, was dead.

J\t tirst, I froze as did the blood in my veins. After a fow seconds, I collected myself hack from shock, and regardless of the pain, regardless of the blood and broken Lones, something inside of me erupted. In the fashion of an army, it invaded my mind and bones and ransacked all thoughts of personal pain while I lifted myself from the ground and limped towards the ambulance with steadily increasing speed. I had to get there before they fully dragged him in that ambulance. I had Losee ifhe was ok. ~Jake! STOP! STOP. That's my brother. STOP!" I shouted. Strange enough nobody reacted, as if my bellowing at the top of my lungs was an echo. I finally made it to the body bag but it was Loo late, they had just gotten him inside the ambulance and were now prepared lo take off with the possible corpse. I didn't wanl to think ab.out it, I just couldn't, but deep inside the thought of him being d~ad gnawed on my mind and left an unsure and frightened hole inside of me.

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Suddenly, th() rrevious bur.st of energy was gone, and I found myself now .struggling Lo.sland on two hmken h,gs.

I staggered 11ainf'ullyfo1·a while, then, I r.olla1,scd to Ilic ground with a thud. I was ldt now looking imo the sky; dark, bleak, and wi1:ha moon that seemed lo shine closer to earth tlia11usual, str.:m1,<cly hauging lower than normal.

So engaged in my own pain, I.Jo1hphysically and menially, I didn't ()Vennotice the tears that were now ru11ning down my face al: the thought of what hap1,cncd. Tiu, parl I hadn't considerc<l 1:hough, umil now, was wl,y I hadn'I: I.Jc•mattended Lo in all 1his Lime of physical sulforing. It wa., almost like I wa.s hcing ..... ignored.

I looked around and went on to 11oticc thal: in all 1his lime I don't even tl,ink a11yone's looked al: me. I cringed a little when I thought about 1hc fac1:that even though my brother's dead, anJ that is houud 1:0catch anyone's eye, nobody had even Lothcred saying anything lo me as f laid on the cold COnGrelehighway rid.lied in Llood and wounds, A thousand <JIICstioriscirculated my mind as I looked around noticing that people would only look in my dircctio11 or indirectly at me Lut not in my face or eyes. It was then that I found the answer l.o my questions.

I looked again towards 1hc .smoking heap of .scrai, tl,at was once Jake's car and saw it roll in,; <p1icklytowards another :1mbulance, surrounrlcd l>yseveral oniccr.s anJ medics. I Iiflcd my h~ad to sec who was on the sl:rctclier, for unlike my brother's body bag, lhe per.son w3s moving, a sm-vivor.The bodies of'tlu: medics an<l officers blocker! my siglu., and I <:ouldn't hear what I.hey were saying because of the obvious reasons.

"Eyes aimed high while the moon h:mgs low ...

Goblcl of rum, l'ull l>uekcl of Ct'own .....

Eyes aimed high while the moon hangs low ...

Just an cchooo, Jusl. an echooo .... ,"

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I squinted my eyes and finally thanks lo one of the cops moving, I caught a glimpse, and to my horror the answer to all my questions laid thel'e, moving his arms and head wilh little energy. I knew now what had fully happened as I discovered that the anatomy of that lone surviv<>rwa.~ none other then that. of my hmthcr Jake.

Shocked and confused, I thought to myself for a minute. Tlte only other person in the car with him ...... was me .... "l~ycs aimed high while the moon hangs low ...

Goblllt of mm, full bucket of Crown .....

Eyes aimcrl high while the moon hangs low ..• Just an cchooo, .lust an cchooo ... ..n

- *- *Shame

By: CassieOlson Hidden by a black veil Shrouded in its own sorrow Thick in the air After harsh words arc said Sitting in a grey corner Alone Waiting for a kind word A reason to lift this pang of guilt To leave it be The one star Lost in the abyss of the universe The one trumpet solo Echoing barren hallways 83

The mother of a serial killer Humiliated by her own flesh and blood The smell of the rain before it's seen Thunder rumbles

Ra.in falls Pe)ting fair,

Tender skin Making its presence felt Not letting one forget Each drop seeping down Each one deeper Then the next The storm billows on AJI of a sudden, Like out of a fairy tale The peaking sun shines once more Drying the soaked soul Until all is as it once was Yet the pain still lingers Like an old baule scar The owner to look upon and reminisce To forget the pain But never the memory

- *-*-

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IstoriaStaff - All for One,and Onefor All!!

Back row (left.to right):Amanda.Torwirt,l}ler Luedke, 11feli'i.Sa Morgan,Robyn Shannon, Cl1nssieSchneider,Ben Edwardson,Dana Hemcl1el,illrs. Paschold,and Derek Ofodirinwa Frontrow (left to riglu): Sarah ,lfcCown,jlfadelonKeller, and Nykky Cl1rastil 1

TedKooserand Company- the U.S.PoetLaureategot tltecltanceto speak at SouthwertHigh Schoolwhile tlte stafj'ofistoriagot tofu{fill Idslifelot1gdream - being in a picturesurrounded~rgirls!! ... and Ben.

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