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For your next swinging form al function (Christmas cocktail parties, evenings at Chevon, Menzies . . .) Let F O R M A L W E A R dress you up to kill (or be killed). Com e, hire a tux, dinner-suit, dress suit . . . Girls hire the gow n o f your dreams for only a small hiring fee. Some valued at over 100 gns.

PLEASE INDICATE THE TYPE OF FORMAL WEAR YOU WISH, AND ENCLOSE A CHEQUE, MONEY ORDER OR POSTAL NOTE T O COVER THE DEP'OSIT AND HIRING COST (DEPOSIT WILL BE RETURNED). TUXEDO: Hiring cost £2; Deposit £5; Postage 6/-; T O T A L £7/6/-. DINNER SUIT: Hiring cost £3; Deposit £5; Postage 6/-; T O T A L £8/6/-. DINNER SUIT AND TUXEDO ACCESSORIES: Shirt 10/- extra; Tie 5/- extra; Gloves 5/- extra; Dress Jewellery 5/- extra. ("Please state collar size). DRESS SUIT: Hiring cost £5/5/-; Deposit £5; Postage 6/-; T O T A L £10/11/-. Hiring cost includes: Dress Shirt and Collar, White Vest, Studs and Cuff Links, White Gloves and White Tie. (Please state collar size of shirt). LOUNGE SUIT: Hiring cost £3; Deposit £5; Postage 6/-; T O T A L , £8/6/-. And for the Fair Sex: Debutante Gown from £8— £5 Dep. Wedding Gown from £10— £5 Dep. Ball Gown from £5— £5 Dep. Fur Stoles from £ 2 /2 /— £5 Dep.

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POST BACK OR RU SH IN TO

M KM ffiw eaR

147a KING STREET, SYDNEY ( at rear of lift ) near Castlereagh St. PHONE 28-0537


THE N.S.W. BUILDERS' LABOURER O fficia l O r g a n o f the N .S.W . B ra n ch o f the

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THE TOPLESS SOCI ETY 1964 w a s th e y e a r o f T h e T o p l e s s . In A u s t r a l i a th e d r e s s w it h th e d e f i n i t i v e p lu n g e n e v e r r e a lly g o t o f f th e g r o u n d . N e v e r t h e ­ l e s s , t o p le s s n e s s w a s r e a ffir m e d a s a n a t­ io n a l c h a r a c t e r is t ic a lm o s t a s im p o r ta n t a s u n d e r d o g -p h ilia . T h e a m o u n t o f t a le n t , l e a d e r s h i p o r d i r e c t i o n a t t h e t o p w a s in f a c t

t e r f e r e n c e in th e A B C . 1964 w a s th e Y e a r o f th e S m e a r . P o l i t i c i a n s c o n t in u e t o d i s p l a y t h e s t a t u r e o f t h e i r i n t e l l e c t s b y p r e f e r r i n g t o a n n ih ila t e t h e s p e a k e r r a t h e r th a n l o g i c a l l y d i s e c t w h a t h e s a y s . T h e b e s t m in d in F e d e r a l P a r l ­ ia m e n t, S ir G a r fie ld B a r w ic k , w a s r e p la c e d

a s b a r e a s th e d a r in g fa s h io n lin e . R ig h t a t th e t o p a r e B o b a n d A r t h u r , f o r m e r a d v e r s a r i e s t o d a y u n it e d in a c o m ­ m o n z e a l t o m a in t a in t h e m s e l v e s in t h e i r l e a d e r s h i p s i n p e r p e t u a , n o t w it h s t a n d in g th e c o s t t o th e c o u n t r y o r t h e i r p a r t i e s . 1964 s a w t h e p u b l i c a t i o n o f D o n W h it in g t o n 's " T h e R u l e r s " , a d e v e s t a t i n g i n d i c t m e n t

b y l i t t l e B i l l i e L i b e l l e r , f a s t e r o n th e s lu r th a n a n y o f h i s f e l l o w s . A u s t r a l i a c a n n o w b o a s t a w h o le p a r t y d e v o t i n g i t s e n e r g i e s a n d i n c r e a s i n g e l e c t o r a l s t r e n g t h t o t h is k in d o f m e n t a l e x e r c i s e : th e D L P . But s m e a r i n g i s n o t c o n f i n e d t o t h e R ig h t : th e L e f t c a n c r y " F a s c i s t " a n d " s c u m " w it h th e b e s t o f t h e m . It i s in t h is k in d o f u n h e a l ­ th y a t m o s p h e r e th a t S e n a t o r B r a n s o n c a n p u t a n u n s u b s t a n t ia t e d r u m o u r o n t o th e f r o n t

o f th e w a y M e n z i e s h a s p u r g e d h i s M i n i s ­ t r i e s o f a n y in d e p e n d e n t s p i r i t s in o r d e r t o m a in t a in h i s r e l e n t l e s s g r i p o n t h e n a t i o n 's p o lic ie s . F o r fifte e n y e a r s M e n z ie s h a s b e e n c o n f r o n t e d w ith th e k in d o f p o l i t i c a l s it u a t io n s t a t e s m e n w o u ld e n v y . E n su red o f e le c t o r a l v ic t o r y - b a r r in g a c c id e n ts - he w a s in a p o s i t i o n t o p u s h t h r o u g h e n l i g h t e n ­ e d , b u t t e m p o r a r ily u n p o p u la r , m e a s u r e s w h ic h m ig h t l a t e r h a v e p r o v e d th e v i s i o n o f th e ir a u th or. I n s t e a d th e f i f t e e n y e a r s h a v e b e e n d e v o i d o f e i t h e r i m a g in a t i o n o r w i s d o m . L o n g s i n c e e x a s p e r a t e d in th e a t t e m p t t o g i v e h i s r e i g n q u a l it y , M e n z i e s h a s s e t t l e d f o r q u a n t ity . L i k e D o n a ld C a m p b e l l , h e m u s t b e th e o n l y p e r s o n in A u s t r a l i a c o n v i n c e d o f t h e s i g n i f i ­

p a g e s o f t h e n a t io n a l p r e s s a n d s t i l l r e t a in h is s e a t a t a d e m o c r a t ic e le c t io n . T h e m o r a lit y o f b ig b u s in e s s is t o p l e s s ­ n e s s p a r e x c e l l e n c e . R e g A n s e t t 's in h is l o b b y , a l l ' s r i g h t w ith th e w o r l d : h i s a i r ­ l i n e s c a s e h a s l u l l e d e v e r y o n e 's m e m o r y o f h i s B ig Q u e e n s la n d T V S w ip e . C o m p a n i e s c o m e and c o m p a n ie s g o b u t fra u d and m i s ­ m a n a g e m e n t ju s t g o on and on . A n d w h e r e i s th a t l i t t l e b o y w h o l o o k s a f t e r th e s h e e p , th e C h u r c h ? H e i s u n d e r th e h a y s t a c k h a v in g a n i g h t m a r e a b o u t s e x o r d r e a m in g u p s o m e n e w g i m m i c k .t o k e e p th e k i d s i n t e r e s t e d . T h e C a t h o l i c C h u r c h

i s t o o a b s o r b e d in m o n e y m a t t e r s t o s p e a k ou t b o ld ly o n m o r a l q u e s t io n s ; th e P r o t e s ­ t a n ts a r e s o b u s y p o p u l a r i s i n g a n d e v a n g e l ­ is in g th a t t h e y h a v e d e s t r o y e d t h e i n t e l l e c t u a l d i s c i p l i n e th a t i s th e b a s i s o f a l l r e l i g i o n . T he C h u rch , w ea k er n ow , m u st speak w ith o n e v o i c e t o b e h e a r d . A n d o n o n l y o n e th in g a r e a l l a g r e e d : S E X IS E V I L . M o r a l it y h a s b e c o m e s y n o n y m o u s w it h s e x a n d w e c a n n o l o n g e r e x p e c t C h u r c h l e a d e r s t o p o in t th e b o n e a t t h e d i s h o n e s t y a n d c o r r u p t i o n o f th e p u b l i c f i g u r e s t o w h o m t h e y fa w n . E a c h y e a r th o u s a n d s d ie a n a g o n is in g d e a th f r o m lu n g c a n c e r a n d y e t a b u s i n e s s l o b b y p r e ­ v e n ts any c u r t a ilm e n t o f c ig a r e t t e a d v e r ­ t is in g : w h a t h a s th e C h u r c h t o s a y o n e s s e n t i a l l y t h is m o r a l q u e s t i o n ? W h e r e h a v e a l l th e i d e a l i s t s g o n e ? G o n e to p r a g m a t i s t s a n d o p p o r t u n i s t s , e v e r y o n e . So m u ch f o r A u s t r a lia , th e T o p l e s s S o c ­ ie t y , a w ild life s a n ctu a ry fo r e m p e r o r s w it h o u t c l o t h e s . It i s in t h is c o n t e x t th a t O Z r a i s e s its v o i c e o f p r o t e s t a n d is h a d up o n a n o b s c e n i t y c h a r g e . T h i s i s th e s i c k s o c ­ i e t y th a t h a s th e i m p e r t i n e n c e t o q u e s t i o n th e c r e d e n t i a l s o f O Z t o g o a b o u t i t s p a r ­ t ic u la r lin e o f b u s in e s s . B y s o m e tw is t o f fa te th e e m p e r o r n o t o n l y d e n i e s th a t h e i s n a k e d b u t d r a g s h is y o u n g a c c u s e r in t o c o u r t o n a c h a r g e o f b e in g a p e r v e r t .

c a n c e o f th e r e c o r d s h e i s s e t t i n g . T h e i g n o m i n i o u s p a r t th e L a b o u r P a r t y in g e n e r a l a n d C a l w e l l in p a r t i c u l a r h a v e p l a y e d in t h is a p p a llin g s t a t e o f a f f a i r s i s t o o w e l l kn ow n to r e it e r a t e . T h e S e n a te e l e c t i o n s h a v e s e t th e s e a l o n t h e i r a b j e c t i o n . T h i s T h i s i s th e P e t e r P a n P a r t y , w h ic h n e v e r g r e w up. A u s t r a l i a 's b a r e p o l i t i c a l t o p n e e d s a n e w p a r t y . O n e p r e p a r e d to lo o k E a s t s q u a r e ly a n d h o n e s t ly , to a d o p t a p o s it io n o f a r m e d n e u t r a l i t y , t o f in d a h a p p i e r c o m p r o m i s e b e t w e e n th e r i g i d i t y o f W h it e A u s t r a l i a a n d th e o b v i o u s p r o b l e m s o f a m u l t i - r a c i a l s o c ­ ie ty . O n th e h o m e f r o n t , i t w o u ld b r i n g A u s t r a l i a in t o l i n e w it h th e r e s t o f th e c i v i l ­ is e d w o r ld on s u ch s o c i a l q u e s tio n s a s c a p ita l p u n is h m e n t , c e n s o r s h i p e t c . ; i t w o u ld p r o ­ t e c t c o m p e t it io n and f r e e e n t e r p r is e f r o m th e a b u s e s o f r e s t r i c t iv e p r a c t ic e s b u t w h e r e m o n o p o l y i s i n e v it a b le o r e c o n o m i c a l l y o v e r w h e l m i n g l y a d v a n t a g e o u s i t w o u ld e n ­ s u r e th a t i t s p r o f i t s g o in t o t h e p o c k e t s o f a l l r a t h e r th a n a f e w . It w o u ld a t t e m p t t o s t r i k e th e d e l i c a t e b a l a n c e b e t w e e n p r o t e c ­ t i o n o f th e n e e d y a n d c o m p r o m i s i n g th e r i g h t s o f th e in d i v i d u a l b y f o r c i n g h i m in to a s t r a it ja c k e t o f s o c ia lis a t io n . U n f o r t u n a t e ly t h e L i b e r a l P a r t y h a s f r a u ­ d u le n t ly

m i s a p p r o p r i a t e d th e t i t l e

su ch a

p a r t y s h o u ld b e a r . In 1964 o n e n o t o n l y d o u b t e d p o l i c i e s b u t t h e p o l i t i c i a n s p r o p o s i n g t h e m . In N .S .W , t h e M a h e r a l l e g a t i o n s h a n g in a b e y a n c e . B u t b e f o r e th a t a L i b e r a l M L A w a s s h o t in P a r lia m e n t H o u s e a n d th e D o y le c a s e r a is e d q u e s t i o n s w h ic h h a v e n o t y e t b e e n a n s w e r e d . In Q u e e n s la n d t h e r e w e r e c h a r g e s o f b r i ­ b e r y a n d c o r r u p t i o n , n o t o n l y a g a i n s t th e p o lic e f o r c e bu t p a r lia m e n t a r ia n s o f a ll m a in p a r t ie s . T h e r e w a s p o lit ic a l c h ic a n ­ e r y — in S o u th A u s t r a l i a t h o s e d o u g h t y k n i g h t s , S i r T h o m a s P l a y f o r d a n d S ir G e r r y M a n d e r r e ig n s u p r e m e - and p o lit ic a l in ­

Sydney, SUNDAY:-A spokesman for the striking clergymen said today that following the recent direction of the Arbitration Court, his union had decided to return to work but, until their claims had been met, to observe strictly all regulations laid down by a Higher Authority. The strikers are demanding double pay on Sundays and over the Christmas period. (The picture shows a group of the strikers after today’ s meeting.)


Christmas is the jo y o f giving. I t’s also the agony of receiving. Because usually you receive something completely useless. But sometime soon that friend who burdened you with anotherpair of cuff links this Xmas must have a birthday. Then it’s some o f his own medicine T ravellin g C lo ck s

Y ou’ ll never find a more u s e le s s pres­ ent than this one. It’ s a scratch ed p la stic box containing a / A split barrel fountain pen that you have to take to b its to re­ load. b / A propelling p e n cil (w ho ever wanted a propellin g p e n c il? ) that w rites anaem ically with shattered lea d s until you un­ screw the end and bits get lo s t in the carpet. c / A fat biro with a thin re fill which writes in v iv id ultramarine for three days and runs out and you ca n ’ t get a re fill anywhere. Individually u s e le s s but very attract­ ive in a set. A va ila b le in brown, lim e-green, or lem on yellow .

Party Trays

Party Trays Just ask your department store for “ crockery buyer’ s fo lly ” and th ey’ ll give you this delightful hand-painted rainbow colou red barbecue-party-TV tray. There are compartments for holding peanuts, ch ips, b is c u its with ch e e se oh them, and o liv e s with toothp icks in them. T h ere’ s a hole for extra tooth­ p ick s, and a knife for chopping ch eese and fin gers. B y g o lly , the d esign ers have thought o f everything, right down to the cle v e r slog a n s painted everywhere, lik e “ com e and get it” and “ down the hatch” . But you won’ t even have to ask the salesm an for them: th ey’ ll be on the first counter you bump into at the front o f the store. Now there’ s s erv ice for you.

Who could re sis t the charm o f little travelling c lo c k s on shop cou nters? Your friends can o f cou rse, but it 's your shout. T ravellin g c lo c k s are ju st so cute that you can stand there opening and shutting and over-w inding them for hours. Buy one for a friend w h o’ s doing some travelling and hasn’ t heard o f the in­ vention o f the wrist-w atch. D esigned to la st three months at lea st, by craftsmen who are now in the toy trade. Writing S e ts. A brown leather c a s e com plete with writing pad, p e n cil, and broken zipper. Give one to a friend who hasn’ t got one already and can be assumed not to need one. G ive one to a friend who’ s doing som e travelling, to add extra weight and volum e to his suit­ c a se , and to save sending th ose con ­ venient air-letters. A vailable leather: dark blue to dark brown. A vailable p e n cils : faint to in v isib le . Instructional P aperbacks Extra u s e le s s , th ese shiny covered non-fiction paper-backed book s shouldn’t be laying around unread on bookshop sh e lv e s, when they can lay round on your frien d s’ sh elves unread. Many u s e le s s title s to ch o o s e from: “ T e a ch y o u rse lf M on golese” “ How to read two thousand words per Minute” “ Sixty Great P h ilo so p h e rs” "R e n a is s a n c e A rchitectu re” etc. etc. A ll remarkably sim ilar, A ll equ ally u se le ss.

Drinking Glasses E n su re: i. That th ey’ re extra expen sive so that p eop le w ill be afraid to a ctu ally drink out o f them, ii. That th ey ’ re very thin, so that th ey’ll shatter while being wiped dry, iii. That th ey’ re a sp e cia l sa le line s o that replacem ents will be im p ossib le.

Sock and T ie se ts G ive th ese priority too. T h e y ’ re clev erly thought out b ox es containing matching tie s and so x . Saves you having to buy tie s and then sox; s a v e s you buying tie s and not sox; sa v es you spending good money on food and rent. —Vern Sundfors

ADS NAUSEAM Here’ s a sp ecia l parlour game to amuse your kiddies during your summer hols. We’ ve taken some o f the ads you all love so well and omitted the last word o f each. We’ ve then supplied a lis t o f p o s s­ ible endings you would like to see on your favourite ads if you were in the “ s e ll” game. This should provide sp ecial attraction for the older boys and girls among you who are learning the copy-writing biz. 1. Where there’ s a man there’ s a . a) woman b) usually a pub in sight c) one in 500 chance o f tinea o f the armpit. 2. Whelan the wrecker w a s ............ a) an English fast bowler b) founder o f the Australian Nazi Party c) The Man Who Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo. 3. Australia’ s New Army needs . . a) a pentropic war b) a guerilla war c) any goddam war at all so long it is war. 4. Take V incent’ s with a) pleasure b) the Pill c) Van Gogh. 5. B inkie’ s burgers a r e ..................... a) ob scen e and indecent publica­ tions b) phantom parking policemen c ) a group o f South African s o l­ diers. -J A R D


THESE

MEN

MUST

Unfortunately, both our political leaders, S ir R o b e r t M e n z i e s and M r C a l w e l l , are old men and have little sympathy with or interest in ex­ panding our national thinking to a more direct involvement in Asian affairs. Neither of these old men has shown any marked interest in forging strong links of friendship between ourselves and the people of these countries. It is too much to expect that they should. Each of them is plainly bored with the difficult issues— of trade policy, of aid policy, of defence policy, of immigration policy— which must nec­ essarily come forward as the world of Asia and the southern seas increasingly grips our national attention. The prospect of 1965 is enlivened by the possibility that early in the year M r C a l w e l l may surrender his reins of leadership and that by the end of this year even S ir R o b e r t may retire to a well earned repose. Hence, just as 1965 may be ffte beginning of a new era in which Asia becomes too close to ignore, so it may also be the end of an era in which two old leaders helped Us to forget the world around us. THE

AUSTRALIAN

SATURDAY JANUARY

2 1965

AM I T O O O LD A T 7 0 T O BE PRIME M INISTER? N O . You can still carry the burden of Prime - Ministerial office, for the burden is light. You may be senile, but only a few of us know and we don’t matter. Yes, skip off to Fiji just when Sukarno has ditched the U.N. . Some will joke about your persistent absence in a crisis (but that just makes our heart grow fonder). Talking of jokes... don’t the press love your public meetings? Every cliche reads like an epigram. Anyway, Bob, hurry back. Hate you to miss an important social function (W asn't Catherine’s wedding a beauty?). Yes, if you don’t return soon; the times they might start a changing...and that would be fatal.


TAG WRESTLING AT CANBERRA H a r o l d H o l t i s w a i t in g w it h i n c r e a s e d im p a t ie n c e f o r h is le a d e r to r e t i r e

W hen

th a t m o m e n t c o m e s h e e x p e c t s to b e g iv e n th e n o d t o t a k e o v e r in c e n t r e r i n g .

But

t h e o l d b o y i s l o a t h e t o q u it . S o m e tim e s H a r o ld fe e ls s o fr u s tr a te d t h a t h e c o n t e m p l a t e s t a k in g p h y s i c a l a c ­ t io n . . . . P ic tu r e d

a re

H a r o ld a n d S ir R o b e r t

s p a r r i n g in t h e i r C a n b e r r a g y m .

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 15, 1939.

.RESIGNATION OF MR. MENZIES. "N othing in his life,” said Malcolm o f the dead thane o f Cawdor, “ became “ him like the leaving it.” Nothing in the political career of Mr. Menzies has become him better than his re­ signation from the Federal Cabinet on a point of principle and consistency. He has not, in truth, abandoned his high office “ as 'twere a carcless trifle,” since he delayed until the last pos­ sible m om ent an action which, apart from its efTects on his own political future, he knew must be deeply em ­ barrassing to the Prime Minister and the Governm ent. But that mom ent having been reached, and a m ajority o f the Cabinet having decided to dis­ card vital features o f the National In ­ surance A ct to which the Ministry and the parties supporting it were pledged, he hesitated no longer to place his sense of duty to his constituents and the country before the advantages of office. Mr. Menzies entered Federal politics and the Lyons Ministry with a brilliant State record and every augury for advancem ent to the h ig h ­ est political post in the Commonwealth. If he did not fulfil all the expecta­ tions o f his admirers, and if it seemed sometimes as if success and political preferm ent had com e to him too easily, the action w hich he took yes­ terday shows that he possesses what is becom ing increasingly rare in public life— a devotion to principle and a re­ fusal to cling to office when con vic­ tions strongly and honestly held cou n ­ sel a contrary course. For that ex ­ ample the public everywhere will h on ­ our him. It will also discern in Mr. Menzies those qualities o f courage and determination which are the blood and bone o f true leadership.

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MIRROR, MIRROR UP THE WALL ISydney Daily Mirror and Sun posters continue to fascinate us, both in their content and grammar. day la st month, for example, a “ model” (every girl the Mirror photo­ graphs is a model — there must be about 10,000 in Sydney) went to the Chevron in la ce s la c k s — for dinner at night! She was not allow ed into the diningroom. By some ch a n ce c o in cid e n ce , the Mirror happened to have a photo­ grapher present at that very moment. Isn’ t it disappointing that there’ s so little new s around that Mirror editor, Mr Z e ll Rabin has to con sp ire with “ m odels” to make it? Anyhow, dear old Z e ll fe ll hook, line and sinker for th is one. After all, he must have had the poster in mind even b efore the “ in cid en t” took p la ce. B eca u se there it was the next day, for all the world to see:

The Sydney Sun’ s photostat o f threatening note received by Miss Shepherd; 5/1/65

The M irror’ s “ photostat” o f the same Letter.

GIRL IN L A C E PANTS OUTED Hotel Scene

The M irror’ s re-tou ch artist had been busy again. Both photos are identical, except that the M irror had added a torso. reader V.G. Watson has forwardedOZtwonewspaperclippings: The first is from the"Age”, Tuesday December 15. The channel 0 movie is “Pick-up A lley” a title too bohemian for Melbourne’s eyes. So:The second cutting is from the infamous “Herald” whichhas thought­ fully changed the name o f the film to something a little more acceptable to its mid- Victorian Victorian read* nO Q O O

06000 o o o o n n o o o o o o o i

MOW ® OQOOOO OOQOO & OOO&O0 O]

22/12/64

ersNote: It definitely was the same film -the story line is exactly the same and most likely both came from the Channel 0 hand-out. 8.30 TUESDAY NIGHT MOVIE —P ick-up Alley (1957). Drama, starring V ictor M ature, A nita Ekberg and Trevor Howard. A United States narcotics agent trails an International drug p ed ­ lar’s reluctant accom plice through the "pick-u p al­ leys” at New York, L ondon, Lisbon, Rom e and Athens (A) A T tJ E S D A J T N IG H T I 0 M O V IE . “ I n t e r p o l’ fA -1

1987). A TJ.S. narcotics I agent trails an toter-* national dope peaur rel8|tant accompli

] I i

I

Frankly, we lo v e these new verbs, like to out, to in, to for, to against. In fact, our sporting writer even wrote us a few paragraphs which we hope Z e ll w ill incorporate into the Mirror’ s style book. Our heading, by the way, is: OU TCAST R O Y ’ S INS AND OUTS S tolle frommed Emerson in the sem i­ finals o f the men’ s sin g les after withing him in the dou bles. Once outed, Emerson w as inned by bus to the city for an inn meeting with a sports writer who had againsted him in the morning paper. T he writer pointed out that he had forced Emerson the day before when he had downed Hewitt. Emerson was put out becau se he felt his reputation was being downed ju st at a time when he was expecting upped o ffers from p rofession al players inned to the US who wanted to in him for the next European tennis season withing Hoad, Sedgman and R osew a ll. Way out, man!


OZ

NEW

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D. CAM PBELL S u ccess

The L ov e Affair to Remember: Bung Kamo Malaysia.

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JUDGE ST E P H E N AND C L IV E E V A T T B e s t A c t o r s o f th e Y e a r : T h e T h e a t r e o f th e A b s u r d is c o n fu s in g but a m u s in g . L i k e ­ w ise a recen t cou rt dram a in ­ volvin g a lle g e d m is a p p r o p r ia ­ tio n o f c lu b fu nds. (H ig hligh ts f r o m th e t r a n s c r i p t a r e r e p r i n ­ t e d in th e c u r r e n t O Z . ) T h o u g h in t h i s c a s e , th e a c t o r s t h e m ­ se lv e s s e e m e d m o s t con fu sed. Q u i c k l y d u b b e d th e ' A b b o t t an d C o s te llo 's o f Q u a r t e r S e s s i o n s ', Stephen and E v att e n te rta in e d a deligh ted tw e lv e m a n a u d ie n c e u n t i l th e e v e o f th e l a w r e c e s s w h e n S t e p h e n s t o l e th e l a s t laugh b y o r d e r i n g a r e - t r i a l ' k t c o n s i d e r a b l e e x p e n s e t o th e C row n".

Nothing lik e a tragedy to make a name famous — think o f C olon el Custer. Now think o f an un­ known captain o f an aircraft carrier (Captain R obertson). In­ volved in a c o llis io n . Name soon on every R oyal Com­ m ission er’ s lip s. R esig n s from the navy. Now writes h istorical n ovels for a daily newspaper. NEW DISH: herd’ s pie.

Spanish fly in Shep-

P a ll guys o f Kruschev and Home.

the year: Niki A le c D ouglas-

W hen A r m y o ffic ia l s u rg e d m e m b e r s o f th e p u b l i c t o h a n d in a n y o l d w a r r e l i c s in c a s e th ey w e r e still leth a l, O Z p r o ffe rre d E ric Baum e. The A rm y d e c l i n e d h i m , a s s u r i n g u s "this B a u m e i s q u it e h a r m l e s s . . . . it h a s b u rn t i t s e l f o u t " .

HAL PORTER T h e b o o k r e v ie w e r o f m a n ia n

n ew sp ap er

lo

F b r t e r 's a u t o b i o g r a p h y a s o - n o t , a s i t t u r n e d 01 h e h a d r e a d m u c h o f it a

MR. BUSH

P o r t e r g a lla n t ly r e s p o r t h e c r i t i c i s m w it h a lit . . " H a l 's m o v i n g f i n g e r a n d h a v in g s e r v e d a w r it , on . . . . "

T he Burning Bush Roger ( “ I am the surfie o f the L o rd ” ) Bush made friends with the Sun’ n ’Sand set and then with the Sunday Mirror after it pub­ lished h is clap-trap about their s e x -liv e s . Now he co a x e s m is­ creants back to the straight-and narrow in a w eekly letter-reply column. P ity God d o e s n ’t coax him back to the Church.

Anti - hero of the year

B AN THE BAU M E:

1964’ s B ore: DONALD CAMPBE1

G u ess you think that is pretty much the £ world over? Campb Why e lse would he i across the P a c ific ? re a lise s w e’ re the c in the world stupid pander and publicise long. Thank God he the record at la st — p is s off. Most overdue resie Kenneth Binns (84) the Commonwealth sorship Board.

W illiam W illis’ T O U R DE F A R C E

A L ady M ackw orth has in ­ v i t e d 12 S y d n e y s o c i a l i t e s to " jo in h e r on a 6 m onth c h a p e r ­ E N G L A N D (o n th e d e a t h o f E d i t h S i t w e l l ) o n e d t o u r o f E u r o p e a n d B r it a in , i n c l u d i n g f i n i s h i n g c o u r s e s in A h e a d f r a m e d w ith w im p le s a n d L o n d o n and P a r i s , plu s p a r t i c ­ toq u es i p a t i o n in th e L o n d o n " S e a s o n " . A l i f e f i l l e d w ith e c c e n t r i c jo k e s C o s t ? " O n l y £ 1 , 4 9 5 " . S a id th e A f a c e th a t w a s G o t h ic L a d y i n a p r e s s in te r v ie w : "I'm A w it c a t a s t r o p h ic A g e n iu s p e r h a p s - o r a h o a x ?

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not a s n o b ".

Sydney landing failed to c o ­ incide with T.V . cameras, so P.R. man Miller tow ed th e raft ou tside the heads but it was becalmed... so he tow ed it in again

Whatei Terenc Sydney Digby ^ Michaei Jack R Mad Me


>URS

LIST

Man o f the Year. tidings for ’ 65: v isit by P rin ce Philip.

A

1964 G u est-list a T asa th e d

n d s a id it, th a t

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B est Selling A uthor: Z E L L RABIN

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LiL

water (H20) same all the ell d oesn ’ t, lug his boat U n less he )nly country 1 enough to i him for so i has broken now he can

nation o f ’ 64

resigned from Literary Cen-

sr happened to: ? Waterhouse ' Sparkes Orr Volfe I Fomenko uby

11?

Z e ll ( “ hot s e l l ’ ’ ) Rabin is ed­ itor o f Sydney’ s D aily Mirror and author o f their pungent billboards. Soon, as part o f a sp e cia l promo­ tion, Z e ll w ill appear at Farm­ e rs’ B ook Department to auto­ graph co p ie s o f his work.

C leric o f the Year: ARCHBISHOP GOUGH T h is remarkable churchman has: • wrangled all year with his own Synod which, d espite all his d en ials, appears to have voted against him over State Aid. • given an interview to the B ulletin which revealed him as a prig and a s o c ia l snob. • extracted many thousands of pounds from Synod for the reno­ vation o f B ish op scourt. • spent the last nine months try­ ing fru itlessly to urge the Sydney p o lic e into instigating a b la s ­ phemy charge against the student journal ‘ Tharunka’ for an article entitled "G o d in a Marijuana P a tch ” . He was fin a lly p a c i­ fied by a d ip lom a tic printer.Pacified ? Perhaps converted. We b e lie v e he’ s spending his sum­ mer h ols, up in the hemp-ridden Hunter River. Gough in a marijuana patch?

MIRIAM MAKEBA fled from Sydney after being terrorised by expatriate South A frican s. JUDY GARLAND fled after being victim ised by the Sydney P ress. Some off-w h ites (notably the PRASAD fam ily) were exported; at le a st one w rite-off PRIN­ CESS MARINA) was imported. Other near-reds (including a R ussian Orthodox bishop) were not allow ed in at all.

T he Man Who’ s Done Most to Extend C hristian Charity Stipendiary Magistrate, G.M. L o ck e , wins the O Z sp e cia l gold-plated cru cifix for his extra­ ordinary work as a member o f the C ath olic Holy Name S ociety. Good on you, Gerald.

TIME magazine ch ose Lyndon B. (B ain e o f the c iv ilis e d world) Johnson as Man o f the Year for 1964. O Z has ch osen B arry G oldwater. Not b eca u se our Foreign Correspondent made a boo-boo over who won the P residen tial election but b eca u se we do not b e lie v e that all the w ellintentioned h eads-in-the-sands o f TIME can co n ce a l that Barry was the most sig n ifica n t figure to em­ erge last year. Goldwater lo st the P resid en cy by the kind o f margin that union b o s s e s dream about. But he pro­ vided a rallying point and figure­ head for a ll those little men the world over — and nowhere more than in Australia — who w ill a l­ w ays b eliev e that bla ck s can never be more than black s and the State should not raise a finger to help the n ot-so-fittest to survive. 1964 w as the High Goldwater Mark o f international con serv a­ tism. W h i t e A u s t r a l i a 64

JA PA N

T. V. T h e y d r y - c le a n e d G am es

T okyo

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th e

T h e y h id a ll th e v i c e s a n d s h a m e s T h e y b a n n e d u r in a t io n O u td o o r s (s u c h fr u s t r a t io n !) A n d t o o k a ll th e s tr e e t w a lk e r s ' n a m e s

R E D CH IN A W h e n C h i n a e x p l o d e d it s B o m b It s h o o k a l l o u r n u c l e a r a p l o m b F o r now w hen one c r a s h e s A n d t r a n s m u t e s us to a s h e s C a n w e b e so su r e w ho it 's f r o m ?

C o m m e n t a t o r and P u b lic

A ffa ir s d ir e c t o r o f a M elb ou rn e r a d io station , N o r m a n ("b loo d ") Banks, re ce n tly returned fro m a f r e e t o u r o f S ou th A f r i c a to p u b l i c i s e th e v i r t u e s o f a p a r t ­ h eid . In N . S. W . it w a s r e v e a l e d th at th e M o r e e s w i m m i n g p o o l i s s e g r e g a t e d a n d th at the tow n sp eop le o f K e m p se y p r a c ­ tis e blatant r a c ia l d i s c r i m i n a ­ t i o n . T h e M a y o r (R . M e l v i l l e ) to ld a r e p o r t e r f r o m 'T h e A u s ­ t r a l i a n ' th a t " w h e n e v e r y b o d y ' s equ al they w ill be tr e a te d as e q u a ls ",


SO ^y. CREAM TH E SKIM O F U N IV ER SITY REVU E Sydney University has separated the cream of University Revues for the past five years......... The sweetest people are in .........SO U R C R EA M ...culled the best of the actors to perform them, and is about to pour downtown..... SO U R C R E A M ...... alw a ys rises to the top ... to the St. Jam es Playhouse (the site of the old Philip Street Theatre).

For some Fridays and Saturdays from

12 Feb. W atch Sydney’s w alls for more news. Anything goes well in....................... .SOUR C R EA M

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REALLY

NECESSARY ?

1964 w i l l g o d o w n in o u r n a t io n a l h e r i t a g e s id e b y s id e w ith 1854 ( E u r e k a ) , 1916 ( G a l l ­ ip o l i ) a n d 1942 (T o b r u k ) f o r th e g a l l a n t r y o f o u r v a l i a n t R . A . N . T h a t w a s th e y e a r t h e y s c o r e d a g lo r io u s d o u b le : one d e stro y e r

I said I thought marriages were made in heaven, but let it pass A

(o u r s ), on e sam p a n (th e ir s ). 1964 w a s a l s o a v in t a g e y e a r f o r t o g e t h e r ­ n e s s . In C a n b e rra : T h e M . P . s vo te d th e m ­ s e l v e s in t o a h i g h e r i n c o m e b r a c k e t . On th e I n t e r n a t io n a l s c e n e : A r a b l e a d e r s , s t i l l s e e t h in g o v e r th e M o s e s c a p e r n o d o u b t , p la n n e d t o d i v e r t th e J o r d o n f r o m I s r a e l . A t h o m e : a r e s is ta n c e m o v e m e n t c a lle d 'R o y 1 w a g e d w a r o n t h e s c o u r g e o f t h e o n e a r m e d b a n d it s . C lu b m a n a g e r s d e c l a r e d t h e m u n fa ir t o c l u b s . S p o r t: k e e p in g up w ith t h e C o n g o l e s e w a s n o p r o b l e m f o r o u r s m a r t y o u n g m e n w h o c o - o r d in a t e d t h e ir l e i s u r e t i m e a n d t r i e d t o b e th e f i r s t o n th e b l o c k t o f o r m a r a p e p a c k . T h e y m e t w ith a d v e r s e c r i t i c i s m f r o m s o m e s e c t i o n s o f th e co m m u n ity b u t ra p e p a c k is t s a r e n o t w o r r ie d b y p u b l i c o p i n i o n . "I t i s th e t e a m s p i r i t th a t co u n ts " s a id o n e fin e y o u n g A u s tr a lia n , "a n d t h in k o f th e in v a lu a b le e x p e r i e n c e w e a r e g a in in g f o r o u r c a r e e r s in T h e S e r v i c e . M u s t k e e p u p th e c o n q u e r i n g h e r o i m a g e in f o r e i g n o u t p o s t s , y 'k n o w . " It w a s a f u l l , h a p p y y e a r f o r m a n y p e o p l e . N ik ita K r u s c h e v , f o r i n s t a n c e . C o n g r a t s o n y o u r r e t i r e m e n t , N ik i. Y o u r s i m p l e S i b e r ­ ia n r e t r e a t m u s t b e c h a r m i n g . A lw a y s d id th in k o f y o u a s b a s i c a l l y th e s a l t o f th e e a r t h typ e. A n d h ow n ic e o f J . E d g a r H o o v e r ( F . B . I . ) t o s a y it w it h f l o w e r s to W a l t e r J e n k in s ( Y . M . C . A . ). O n th e f a s h io n f r o n t , t h is h a s b e e n a t o p ­ p in g y e a r . T o p l e s s d r e s s e s w e r e v e r y In . O r O u t, i f y o u 'd r a t h e r . A t f i r s t t h e r e w a s s o m e c o n t r o v e r s y and in d e c e n c y c h a r g e s . T h e d e fe n ce o f on e su ch t r ia l g iv e s o n e r e a ­ s o n t o b e l i e v e th a t t o p l e s s d r e s s e s a r e o n th e w a y t o b e i n g a c c e p t e d . I q u o t e M r . G r y f f on b e h a lf o f M is s N e ls o n (M is s T o p le s s o f 1 9 6 4 ): ." O n th e n ig h t o f th e o f f e n c e s h e d id n o t h a v e a t o p l e s s f r o c k b u t s h e w a n t e d to w ear one. N o b o d y in th e w o r l d h a d w o r n t o p le s s s la c k s b e f o r e s o sh e d e c id e d to t r y it o u t . S h e u s e d th e b a d la n g u a g e w h e n s h e b e c a m e u p s e t a t h e r s t y le o f d r e s s n o t m e e t ­ in g w ith th e a p p r o v a l o f p o l i c e o f f i c e r s . I a m in s t r u c t e d t o i n f o r m y o u s h e w i l l c o n f in e h e r s e l f in fu t u r e t o w e a r i n g t o p l e s s f r o c k s a n d n o t a t t e m p t in g t o i n t r o d u c e n e w f a s h io n s w h ic h m a y , o r m a y n o t , m e e t w ith th e a p ­ p r o v a l o f p o l i c e . " A f a s h i o n - l e a d e r 's l o t i s not a happy o n e . T h i s y e a r in e n t e r t a in m e n t . T h e B e a t l e s t h r e w M a c l e a y S t. in t o a s t a t e o f m a r t i a l la w . J u d y G a r l a n d t h r e w . D r a m a . K i s s e s . H y s te r ic s . Y o u n a m e it - s h e t h r e w it . M ir ia m M a k e b a m e t , b r i e f l y , h e r a d o r in g p u b lic at C h e q u e r s . T h e R o y a l B a lle t v i s i t ­ e d a n d th e T r u s t f l a p p e d u n t il t h e y d e c i d e d t o a u c t i o n th e t i c k e t s . D a m e M a rg o and R u d o lp h N u r e y v (th e m a n w ith g o l d la m e j o c k - s t r a p ) f e a t u r e d a t th e N e w t o w n f o l l i e s ; n o t t o m e n t io n S u r f C i t y , th e C h e v r o n a n d P u r p l e O n io n . A u s t r a l i a 's o w n R o b e r t H e l p m a n t o o k t im e o f f f r o m s t o m p in g w it h Johnny O 'K e e f e t o p r e s e n t h i s n e w b a l l e t " T h e D i s ­ p la y " . It w a s t e r r i b l y n e o - c l a s s i c : a l e t 's s u p p o s e - L e d a - m e e t s - t h is - k i n g - l y r e b i r d - a t a - C a m p - C o v e - b a r b e c u e t y p e o f t h in g w ith a T r u e C o n f e s s i o n s e n d in g : th e b i r d g e t s th e b ir d . " W h o 's A f r a i d o f V i r g i n i a W o o l fe ? "

i n s p i r e d m o r e g a y p a r t y g a m e s th a n a l l th e 'P e r l e 's P e a r l s f o r P a r t y - P e o p l e 1a n d H in ts f o r S w in g in g H o s t e s s e s 'a r t i c l e s in a d e c a d e o f g lo s s ie s . A nd o f c o u r s e th ere w as c o c k fig h t in g . T h e C le a n F a m i l y N e w s p a p e r w a s d i s g u s t e d - m o r e , it i s p r e s u m e d , t h r o u g h th e fla u n t in g o f th e S u n d a y O b s e r v a n c e A c t th a n a s o f t s p o t f o r c o c k s . M y a w a r d f o r th e M a n o f th e Y e a r g o e s to R e g A n s e t t f o r h is u n t ir in g q u e s t a f t e r n e w and b e tte r r o u te s . T h e B o o k o f th e Y e a r i s " I f Y o u a r e A r ­ r e s t e d " , a n E v e r y m a n 's g u id e to w h a t t o d o t i l l th e L a w y e r /D o c t o r /P h o t o g r a p h e r / I n d e ­ p en d en t W itn e s s c o m e s . I a m lo o k in g f o r ­ w a r d t o th e n e x t o f t h e s e r i e s " I f Y o u A r e C e r t i f i e d " w ith a f o r e w o r d b y D r . M c G e o r g e . T r a v e l l e r o f th e Y e a r a w a r d m u s t g o t o R e g i n a l d S p i e r s . H is F l y N o w , P a y L a t e r p a ck a g e t o u r f r o m L o n d o n to P e r t h in s p ir e d u n fo r g e tta b le n e w s p a p e r h e a d lin e s lik e M A N C O M E S IN B O X F R O M U .K . ( " B l a m e it a l l o n th e 'A v o i d th e C h r i s t m a s C r u s h a n d P o s t y o u r C h r i s t m a s M a le E a r l y ' p o s t e r s " , h e s a i d . ) M r . S p i e r s a l s o i n s p i r e d th e E g y p ­ t ia n E m b a s s y in R o m e t o t r y a n d f o r w a r d a n o u t - m o d e d s p y t o C a i r o v ia d i p l o m a t i c p ou ch . T h e y t r i e d t o e x p l a i n it a w a y b y s a y in g it w a s a c h a in l e t t e r a n d t h e y d i d n 't l i k e t o b e s p o i l s p o r t s a n d b r e a k it. T h e y e a r s f a v o u r i t e r e s o r t a r e a w a s th e l o v e l y H u n te r R i v e r d i s t r i c t . H in ts o f a b u m p e r c r o p at D a lw o o d a n d an a b u n d a n ce o f b u s h la n d f l o r a b e t w e e n B r a n x t o n a n d M orp eth a ttra cte d d r o v e s o f v is ito r s w ho w a n ted to S ee A u s t r a lia F i r s t . T h e s c a r ­ c i t y o f t o u r i s t f a c i l i t i e s d id n o t d e t e r th e n a t u r e l o v e r s w h o w e r e o n l y t o o w i l l i n g to ta k e p o t l u c k . b y S .H .

A ll About O Z EDITO RS: Richard N eville, Richard Walsh. A R T D IR E C T O R : M a r t i n Sharp. A R TISTS: Gary Shead, Peter Kingston. M ike Glasheen. • OZ is an independent magazine. It is published by OZ Publications Ink Limited, 16 Hunter Street, Sydney. BW 4197, X M 1448 (after hours). • OZ should appear on the first of every month, but is usually late. In Sydney, OZ is available from streetcorner vendors and larger city news­ agents. Collins Book Depot dis­ tributes OZ in Melbourne; Cheshire's sells OZ in Canberra. In Adelaide, OZ available from Mary Martin’s Bookshop or from John Waters, St. Mark’s College. Jack’s Central Newsagency, The Record Market and larger newsagents handle OZ in Brisbane. • OZ makes a token, payment to con­ tributors. Articles should be typed. They do not necessarily have to be satirical. Send manuscripts or artwork to the above address. Back copies are still available for //-. Nos. I, 4, 6, 8, a n d 9 have sold out. Printed by Tru-Tracts Pty. Ltd. Sydney Telephone: 92-7805


Long queue at the end of the Quest In th e a f t e r n o o n , a f t e r an a d e q u a t e b u t l i m p s a l a d , R a y l e e n i n s i s t e d th at I a c ­ com p a n y h er on a tour of th e N a t i o n a l W a r M u s e u m ( W W M ) . T h i s i s o n e o f th e s h o w p i e c e s o f th e C a n b e r ­ r a g o v e r n m e n t w h i c h is s h o w n to e v e r y f o r e i g n e r . R a y l e e n had a genuine p r i ­ d e in t h i s m a u s o l e u m o f th e s p i r i t o f m i l i t a r i s m and sp ok e e a s i l y o f L o n e P in e, C h e o n g -s a m R id ge an d C y p r u s . D u r i n g th e l o n g ( G o v e r n ­ m e n t -o w n e d ) b u s t r i p o u t to N W M w e p a s s e d c l o s e to the n e w l a k e , o n e o f th e f e w c o m p o n e n t s o f th e U. S. d e v i s e d c i t y p la n r e t a i n e d b y it s A u s t r a l i a n m o d i f i ­ ers. O nce again I had a ch a n ce to note w hat had i m p r e s s e d m e several t i m e s b e f o r e - - th e p o o r q u a l i t y o f w o r k m a n s h i p in t h i s la n d .

1

COLIN SIMPSON, touring Australia with his State guide, Rayleen, has visited a hop field and now visits the adm inis­ trative heart o f the Commonwealth. T h e la k e r e t a i n i n g w a l l w a s c r a c k in g and e v e n c r u m b l i n g in s p o t s an d I w o n d e r e d s i l e n t l y h o w lo n g it w o u l d t a k e th e r e g i m e to r e a l i s e th at an e f f i c i e n t w o rk m a n m u st take a p rid e in h i s w o r k . N o i n c e n t i v e e q u a ls no w o r k m a n s h ip . R a y l e e n f l u s h e d an d low ered her brow n eyes

But en th u sia sm c o u ld not m a k e u p f o r th e l a c k o f th e p rofit m otiv e. I saw a s im ila r la ck o f p r id e in w o r k m a n s h i p w h e n v i s i t i n g th e B e r l i n W a l l in '60 ( A d a m i n E d e m - C o l i n S i m p s o n 1961). T h e bu ild in g w as not a th in gof a r c h it e c t u r a l b e ­ a u ty ( b y W e s te r n s t a n d a r d s )

FOR THEM BUT NOT FOR ME v is it o r s f r o m oth er parts o f the c o u n t r y w a s m o v in g u p th e w i d e s t o n e s t e p s . O cca sio n a lly a grou p of s c h o o lc h il d r e n o r a 'p a c k ' o f Cubs o r B ro w n ie s (id ­ e n t i f i e d b y th e b r i g h t s c a r ­ v e s ) w o u l d b e l e d in to th e e n tra n ce by th eir d e d i c a ­ ted l e a d e r s .

TAKE ME TOO w hen I p oin ted to a p a r t i c ­ u lar s e c t i o n o f shoddy w o r k . I l e a r n e d l a t e r th at s h e h a d b e e n o n e o f th e young G ir l G uides v o lu n ­ t a r i l y w o r k i n g o n th e w a l l s in t h e i r s p a r e S a t u r d a y s and a fte r Sunday s c h o o l.

R a y le e n p ositiv ely g lo w ­ ed as she s h e p h e r d e d m e i n s i d e a n d a r o u n d th e v a r ­ an d l i k e m a n y o t h e r A u s t ­ i o u s e x h i b i t s . L ik e m o s t r a l i a n S tate b u i l d i n g s w a s y o u n g A u s t r a l i a n s s h e h a d a m a s s iv e squat stru ctu re b een edu ca ted fr o m c h ild ­ b u i l t in th e s h a p e o f a h o l ­ h o o d t o a d e e p r e s p e c t f o r l o w s q u a r e . ( Y o u c a n t e l l t h e d o i n g s o f th e S tate the c h a r a c t e r o f a p e o p l e A r m y . f r o m th eir b u ildin gs. ) H e r p rid e w as c o m p l e t ­ A c o n s ta n t s t r e a m o f ely g enu in e a l t h o u g h a

1

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W esterner may not under­ with which each person stand this attitude. (Adam kept his co rrect position. Goes W est - - C o lin S im p ( O f co u rse , Australians son 1958). are not unused to queues. We passed dioram as of In Adelaide and Melbourne great Australian skirm ish­ I often noticed long lines es and defeats while R ayof shoppers outside the leen c h a t t e r e d on o f th e a tr e s , foodshops and Sim pson's donkey, Jacka clothing stores as I was V. C. and other soldiers whisked by in an official elevated to folk-hero status black lim ousine). by a shrewd State. It is 11 was a rem arkably only possible to maintain m ixed crowd with h erd s­ an A rm y in a land of such men and sm all fa rm e rs sm all population (11 m il­ from the dry W estern hin­ lions) if a certain glamour terland joining f a c t o r y is attached to the whole w o r k e r s i n open neck gory business. A t lea st, shirts and State o ffic e this seem s to be the r e a s ­ w orkers. oning o f those shadowy I offered a sm all r o s y figures i n the large white cheeked child a piece of building on the banks of chocolate (a delicacy in the Lake. Australia) as I left the In the centre of the WW M q u e u e a n d his mother there is a sm all court­ t h a n k e d m e profusely. yard and here I witnessed A ustralian m others love one of the sights truly un­ their children just as much ique to Australia - - a sp e c­ as W estern mothers but tacle a l w a y s rem arked children in A u stralia don't upon by v isito rs but never see enough chocolate theless still startling the as far as I can tell. The f i r s t tim e one chances chubby lad reminded me upon it. strongly of the diminutive A crowd of several hun­ Hans of Stuttgart (Take me dred people was waiting in to Lichtenstein - - Colin a queue six -deep around Simpson 19&1). the perimeter of the square A fter this b r ie f brush under an uncomfortably with the populace, Rayleen warm A ustralian sun. Rayand I were politely (but leen informed m e w i t h firm ly) taken to the head som e pride that m ost of of the queue and we enter­ them had waited for se v ­ ed the se m i-g lo o m of the eral hours and that for the sm all building. tardy it would be in vain, Then, with the other for the doors of the sm all v is ito r s , (som e of whom building upon which a l l travelled hundred of m il­ eyes were turned would es for this experien ce), we shut in an h ou r's tim e. shuffled slowly past the I took my place at the black shape resting on its end of the long queue but a tim ber cradle. A fter all uniformed attendant at onoe I had im agined, the exhib­ saw from my leather shoes it was something of a d is ­ and woollen coat that I was appointment but I was still not an Australian citizen. m o v e d and bent low to He ushered me to the head catch a clo se r glim p se. of the queue - a privilege Some even k issed it but I of o verseas v isito rs who could not quite enter into bring m uch-neededfor eign the spirit as much as R ay­ exchange. leen would have liked. In My efficient guides had previously given m e little chance to see the people in their natural state as it were and even now R a y leen tried to divert my attention with her bright rem arks. But I was struck by the quiet stolidity of the crowd and the care

a m atter of a few seconds we were past it and out into the bright Australian day. R espect for deeds past is universal, but as a W e s t e r n e r , could I really bend low (as some did) and kiss the stern of a Japanese midget sub­ m arine ?


For A Violent Death...

W X H

GO FOR A RIDE

Pd

O

fa

(1,756 Killed on Australian roads last year)

u z

o

CROSS A STREET

C o n g r a t u l a t io n s t o a l l o u r m e m b e r s in N . S. W ! W h a t a w o n d e r f u l y e a r it h a s b e e n - o v e r 1 ,0 0 0 d e a t h s a n d c o u n t l e s s m o r e s e r ­ io u s ly m a im e d . A t r u ly n o b le a c h ie v e m e n t o f w h ic h w e c a n a l l b e j u s t l y p r o u d . W e lo o k fo r w a r d to s e e in g m o s t o f y o u at th e a n n u a l F o r d D a y r e - u n i o n . A lt h o u g h m a n y o f o u r o ld c o m r a d e s w ill n o lo n g e r b e w it h u s , t h e y w i l l n o t b e f o r g o t t e n a t t h e d r i v e - p a s t . A t th e le tt in g -d o w n o f th e t y r e s w e w ill r e m e m b e r th em . T h e s u r v iv o r s w ill a l w a y s h o n o u r t h e i r d e a t h ly h e r o i s m a n d

(811 Pedestrians killed last year)

GO FOR A SWIM (4 4 0 Drowning victims)

JOIN THE N AVY (82 Went down 1964)

LIVE IN AUSTRALIA

r e c k l e s s c a r e l e s s n e s s w h ic h 'a t l a s t b r o u g h t its ju s t r e w a r d . R e g a r d le s s o f th e c o s t to t h e m s e l v e s a n d o t h e r s t h e y c o n t in u e d t o d r i v e d a n g e r o u s l y : c o r n e r i n g a t h ig h s p e e d , o v e r ­ t a k in g in th e f a c e o f th e e n e m y a n d s t r ik i n g t e r r o r in t o th e c r a v e n h e a r t s o f a l l n o n ­ m em bers. A t b lin d c o r n e r s , p r e c i p i t o u s h ills and b u s y in t e r s e c t io n s , th ey n e v e r h e s ­ it a t e d . T h e y a r e a n in s p ir a t io n to u s a ll.

(O n ly 2million will survive a nuclear attack)

For A Lingering Death...

In l o o k i n g b a c k o n 1 964 y o u r c o m m i t t e e c a n d i s p e n s e w ith a l l f a l s e m o d e s t y . N o b o d y c a n d e n y th a t it h a s b e e n a r e a l l y s p l e n d i d y e a r . A s a r e s u lt o f o u r r e p r e s e n ta tio n s , s p e e d l i m i t s w e r e r a i s e d in a n u m b e r o f a r e a s a n d th e c a m p a i g n a g a i n s t s e a t - b e l t s c o n t i n u e s t o h o l d i t s o w n . T h e s u c c e s s o f o u r d e a li n g s

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and relax. When it comes, it comes. There’s nothing you can do about it.

w it h th e m a g i s t r a t e s c a n b e s e e n in th e c o n ­ tin u in g p o l i c y o f m o d e s t p e n a l t i e s f o r d r u n k ­ en and r e c k le s s d r iv in g . A tte m p ts to in c r e a s e w a s te fu l p o lic e p a tr o ls h a v e b e e n th w a rte d a n d o u r o p p o s i t i o n to a l c o h o l t e s t s h a s c o m ­ m a n d e d g r a t i f y i n g l y w id e s u p p o r t a m o n g a l l s e c t i o n s o f th e c o m m u n i t y .

3ut t h is i s n o t i m e t o r e s t o n o u r la u r e l s .

i f ^ Page 16 OZ January 1965] ^ -------4------- ------------------

^ O u r p la n s f o r 1965 i n c l u d e : la r g e r c a r -p a r k s at pubs in t r o d u c tio n o f m e ta l t e le g r a p h p o le s on a ll s tr e e ts s t r a t e g i c p l a c e m e n t o f " R o a d U p " s ig n s o n b l in d c o r n e r s r e - s t o c k i n g o u t ly in g s u b u r b s w ith m o r e p e d e s tr ia n s . M a k e 1965 Y O U R y e a r . It i s s o e a s y t o m a k e a c o n t r i b u t i o n b y b e in g j u s t a l i t t l e m o r e c a r e le s s and a g g r e s s iv e . W h e n in d o u b t a l w a y s a c t u p o n th e b a s i c r u l e o f o u r a s s o c ia tio n : " F o o t D ow n and F o r w a r d !" A n d a lw a y s r e m e m b e r : o n e fo r th e r o a d m ig h t w e l l m e a n a n o t h e r s t e p t o w a r d s o u r ta rg e t. E v e r y s in g l e l i f e c o u n t s , s o ta k e o n e n o w a n d f e e l t h e s a t i s f a c t i o n o f h a v in g h e l p e d th e c a u s e . P . S . In a n s w e r t o t h o s e m e m b e r s w h o h a v e w r it t e n t o u s a b o u t c h i l d r e n th e a n s w e r i s y e s ; t h e y c o u n t a s o n e in th e s a m e w a y JO H N P O W E L L

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1788 and all that! I w a s n o t l i k e th e o t h e r s in t h e h u lk s - c u t t h r o a t s , t a v e r n r a t s , J a c o b i t e s . I w a s s im p l y o u t o f h a r m o n y w it h m y e n v i r o n m e n t a n d g o t c a u g h t u p in th e u n ju s t c r i m i n a l la w s o f m y d a y . I b l a m e th e I n d u s t r i a l R e v o l u t i o n . It w a s a l l a h a r m l e s s p r a n k , p o a c h i n g th a t s w a n f r o m J o h n 's . T h e m a g ’ s tra L e d i d n 't t h in k s o . H e s a id th e C o lle g e sw a n s w e r e r e s e r v e d f o r th e d o n s . A n d in a n y c a s e I w a s n 't a s tu d e n t a t O x f o r d s o h e h a d n o o p t io n b u t t o p a s s s e n ­ ten ce. A s a n e x a m p l e t o o t h e r lo u t s l e s s e d u c a t e d th a n m y s e l f , h e s a i d . W h en th ey o ffe r e d m e s e v e n y e a r s ' t r a n s ­ p o r t a t i o n I j u m p e d a t th e c h a n c e . N o th in g l i k e a l o n g s e a t r i p t o g i v e y o u th a t s e n s e o f p e r s p e c t iv e . G e t a g o o d ta n , r e g u la r v i c ­ t u a ls , m e e t a n ic e c la s s o f p e r s o n . The p ic tu r e w a s c e r ta in ly a ttr a c tiv e . L o n e ly b e a c h e s , b lu e b l u e s k y , su n b l e a c h e d s a n d . G e t a w a y la n d . I c o u l d f e e l th e e x c i t e m e n t in th e a i r . T h e e x c i t e m e n t o f g e t a w a y . H e r e w a s a w a y o f e a r n in g a b ig r e m i s s i o n a n d a m e n t io n in th e p a r i s h n e w s . A n d i f t h is s o r t o f th in g c a u g h t o n w it h th e m a n in t h e s t r e e t a w a y o f p la y in g a s i g n i f i c a n t p a r t in th e b i r t h o f a n a t io n . T h a t 's w h a t I w a n t e d m o s t I s u p p o s e , a c h a n c e to p r o v e m y s e lf , to p e r ­ p e t r a t e s o m e t h i n g t h a t p o s t e r i t y w o u ld a lw a y s r e m e m b e r . L ik e a c it y o r a d y n a s ty . A s it t u r n e d o u t I w a s n 't s o r r y I v o l u n ­ t e e r e d . T h e t r i p t o th e A n t ip o d e s d i d m e a w o r l d o f g o o d . I w a s n 't a s c r a p s e a s i c k . I e v e n d e v e l o p e d a p a s s i o n f o r th e i n d iv id u a l w a y t h e y s e r v e d th e m e a l s . T h e t i m e p a s s e d in a f e v e r i s h w h i r l o f p la n k s w a b b in g , b i l g e b a i l i n g a n d P . T . f r o m th e y a r d a r m . F o r r e c r e a t i o n w e h a d th e r o d s , t r i a n g l e s a n d o f c o u r s e o u r lo g ta b le s and s o m e t im e s w e h e l p e d r o l l d e a d m a r i n e s o f f th e s t e r n . M o s t ly w e d id n o t h in g b u t l a z e a r o u n d s o a k in g u p th e su n a n d r e a d in g b a c k n u m b e r s o f T h e T a t l e r u n til t h e l u n c h g o n g w e n t. C r o s s i n g th e L i n e w a s f u l l o f t h r i l l s . W e a l l h a d s u lp h u r b a t h s a n d m o l a s s e s a s a t r e a t . T h e r e w a s a r a t r a c e f o r th e l i t t l i e s a n d s o m e o f th e o l d s a l t s f a v o u r e d th e la d s a n d l a s s e s w ith a b r a c k e t o f r o l l i c k i n g s h a n t ie s b e l o w d e c k s . A f e w o f u s e n t e r e d t h e s p i r i t o f th e o c c a s i o n and g o t k e e lh a u le d . W h i c h is n o t a s b a d a s it l o o k s p r o v i d e d y o u h o l d y o u r b r e a t h . T h e o f f i c e r s e n j o y e d t h is p a r t o f th e fe s t iv it ie s . T h e y k ep t fir in g t h e ir m u s k e ts . T h a t n ig h t w e h a d a f a n c y d r e s s b a l l . A s a r u le I d o n 't g o m u c h o n o r g a n i z e d g a m e s , p a r t i e s , th a t s o r t o f t h in g b u t w e m a d e a n e f f o r t , r u m m a g e d in o u r t r u n k s a n d t u r n e d up ju s t a s th e m u s ic w a s s ta r tin g d r e s s e d a s c iv ilia n s . W hat a r io t! A n d th e n b e f o r e w e k n e w it th e t r i p w a s a l m o s t o v e r . A f t e r th e u s u a l T u e s d a y n ig h t b ib le c la s s and m o u th -w a te r in g s u p p e r o f t h in g s o n t o a s t , n o n e o f u s c o u l d s l e e p a w in k , w e w e r e i n s u c h a t i z z . E ig h t m o n t h s o f b e in g c o d d le d and h e r e w e w e r e a n ch o re d o ff a c o n ­ t in e n t . W e m a d e th e l a s t e n t r i e s in o u r d i a r i e s a n d , c o m e th e d a w n , t h e r e w a s th e m a n o f s c r i p t u r e o f f e r i n g a f e w e lo q u e n t w o r d s o n C h r i s t i a n v a l u e s in a s e c u l a r s o c ­ i e t y . W e w e r e a b o u t t o i n t r o d u c e t h e k n ife a n d f o r k , ru n n in g w r it i n g a n d th e 31 A r t i c l e s to th e h e a th e n , he s a id , and w e m u s t n ot fa il th em .

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H a lf a l e a g u e o n w a r d w a s a s p e c t a c u l a r I v i e w o f r o c k s a t l o w t id e a n d a s w a m p b e h i n d J

I o w n it lo o k e d d e v ilis h e x tin c t to m e e x c e p t f o r tw o b la c k fe llo w s o n a m o u n d , b e s id e t h e m s e l v e s w ith g r a t i t u d e , w a v in g w e l c o m i n g f i s t s a t u s . A r t h u r w a s u p o n th e f l a g s h i p p o o p h a v in g a n e y e - s p y . L ie u t e n a n t K in g w a s c h e c k i n g th e a l m a n a c k . C a p t a in H u n te r lin e d u s u p a n d h a n d p ic k e d a c r e w f o r t h e p in n a c e . A n e w a d v e n t u r e w a s a b o u t t o b e g i n . W e put o n c l e a n l i n e n , g a v e a l a s t m in u t e p o l i s h to o u r d o g c o l l a r s , a d ju s t e d th e a r r o w s , s o t h e y a l l r a n th e s a m e w a y a n d th e n w e w e r e r e a d y . I t ie d m y o ld w o r k h o u s e c o l o u r s to m y b e lt. G o o d c o n t e m p o r a r y th in k in g t h a t. W e w e r e a p r e t t y n if t y l o t a s w e c l a m b e r e d in t o th e lo n g b o a t . O n th e w a y in w e s t a r t e d a s in g a l o n g w ith s o m e t r a d i t i o n a l b a l l a d s a n d I m u s t s a y it w a s v e r y e m o t i o n a l , th e su n r i s i n g d r a m a t ­ i c a l l y in th e e a s t , o u r C a p t a in b a l a n c in g a p i c t u r e o f th e m o n a r c h o n h is h e a d a n d w e p i o n e e r s s in g in g a s w e c r a c k e d t h e s m a l l o n e s in t o th e s h o r e . A c t u a l l y w e n e v e r g o t th a t f a r . W e r a n o n t o a s a n d b a r a b o u t f o r t y y a r d s o f f . B it o f an a n t i -c l im a x , s tu ck th e r e l i k e t h a t. B ig q u e s t i o n : W h o c a r r i e s th e s tu ff a s h o r e ? T h e r e w a s a fla g , a te a c h e s t o f c r u c i f i x e s a n d t r i n k e t s , a l l th e c u t l u n c h e s . I d i d n 't w a n t t o a p p e a r t o o p u s h y b u t w it h th e p r o s p e c t o f a p la q u e o r a s ta t u e b e i n g p u t u p o n th e s it e a n d in y e a r s t o c o m e p r o b a b l y a r e - e n a c t m e n t o f t h is v e r y s c e n e I w a s n 't g o i n g t o s it b a c k . S o I o f f e r e d t o c a r r y th e C a p t a in o n m y b a c k . S u r p r i s e . S u r p r i s e . I c o u l d t e l l th e o t h e r s w e r e e n v i o u s . C o m ­ p l im e n t s w e r e e x c h a n g e d . S o w e w a d e d a c r o s s th e b a r , m e a n d th e C a p t a in in f r o n t t h e m o b s t r u n g o u t b e h in d d r a g g i n g th e b o a t . I w o u ld b e in th e h i s t o r ­ i c a l r e c o r d s f o r s u r e . T h e n a fu n n y th in g h a p p e n e d o n th e w a y t o th e b e a c h . T h e r e w a s t h is c h a n n e l w h ic h w a s q u it e d e e p . H a lf w a y a c r o s s a f i s h w ith a b i g f i n o n h i s b a c k g l i d e d u p and to o k m e , le g s tu m p , b a ll and a ll. Y ou c o u l d h a v e k n o c k e d m e o v e r . T h e y s a id l a t e r it w a s a w h a l e r s h a r k b u t p e r s o n a l l y I th in k i t w a s a t i g e r . A n y w a y , s i l l y b i l l y l e t th e C a p t a in f a l l s p l a s h in th e P a c i f i c . L o r d , h o w w e a l l la u g h e d . Q u it e r i d i c u l o u s h e l o o k e d , w e t a l l o v e r a n d th e d y e r u n n in g o u t o f h is c u m m e r b u n d . B u t h e d i d n 't c o m p l a i n w h ic h I th ou gh t w a s j o l l y d e c e n t o f h im . I fe lt a b it q u e a s y m y s e lf but I im p r o v is e d a c r a w l w it h l i t t l e s c i s s o r k i c k s a n d g o t t h e r e b e f o r e th e o t h e r s . M y p r o u d e s t m o m e n t . O n e l e g o n d r y la n d . A n d s t a n d in g .

The ruling, by the N f Hampshire Supreme Court yesterday cleared the way far the trial of an inva­ sion - of - privacy suit in which a couple accuse their former landlord o£ planting an eavesdropping device in their bedroom. Carl Hamberger, an automotive agency parts manager, and his wife, Mae 29, charged that the daVlce was hidden in their room for a year.

Mrs Hamberger said the discovery of the device was such a shock that she has been under a doctor ever since.

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p it a l a n d h e w a s o p e r a t e d o n . O n th e f i r s t o c c a s io n he w a s o p e r a te d on , h e s u ffe r e d th e l o s s o f o n e ----- . I w e n t t o s e e th e M i n i s ­ t e r fo r S o c ia l S e r v ic e s (M r . R o b e r t s o n ), and I put t h is m a n 's c a s e t o h i m . In a s e c o n d o p e r a t io n , he lo s t a n o th e r. T h e M i n i s t e r f o r S o c i a l S e r v i c e s , f r o m th a t d a y , h a s g i v e n t h is m a n n o t h in g . I s a id to th e M i n i s t e r : " I in t e n d t o r a i s e t h is m a t t e r in th e H o u s e . I w o u ld l i k e y o u t o h e lp m e to i n t r o d u c e t h i s s u b j e c t . W h a t a m I g o in g t o s a y ? I c a n n o t g o in t o th e H o u s e a n d s a y that h e i s a g e ld in g .. W h a t w o u ld b e th e p r o p e r w a y to d e s c r i b e h is t r o u b l e ? W o u ld th e p r o ­ p e r t e r m b e h is p r i v a t e s o r h i s t e s t i c l e s ? " T h e M i n i s t e r s a id : " L e a v e it t o m e a n d I w i l l h a v e a l o o k a t i t . " T h a t w a s 18 m o n t h s a g o a n d th e M i n i s t e r h a s n o t l o o k e d a t it y e t . "

Privates’ Progress T h e m a t t e r a b o u t w h ic h I a m n o w g o in g to s p e a k i s n o t n e w . I s p o k e in t h is H o u s e o n th e 2nd M a y in r e g a r d t o it . T h e w h o le c a s e a p p e a r e d in th e " M e d i c a l J o u r n a l " an d a l s o in th e " N e w Y o r k T i m e s " . I f it h a s a p p e a r e d in t h o s e t w o p u b l i c a t i o n s , s u r e l y t h e r e is n o t h in g w r o n g a b o u t s p e a k in g h e r e o n it o n b e h a l f o f t h is p e r s o n . T h e c a s e w a s th a t o f a m a n w h o w a s e m ­ p l o y e d in o n e o f th e l a r g e c ity T a t t ' s b u ild in g s in S y d n e y a s a c l e a n e r . T h i s g e n t le m a n h a d b e e n w o r k i n g a t th e j o b f o r n in e m o n t h s in a co m m e n d a b le m a n n e r. On a c e r ta in d a y , he w a s e n g a g e d in th e r e m o v a l o f a s o f a f r o m o n e r o o m to a n o t h e r . T h e g e n t le m a n a t th e o t h e r en d o f th e s o f a a l lo w e d h is en d o f th e s o f a t o d r o p . T h a t i s w h e r e a l l th e t r o u b l e s ta r t e d . T h is m an w a s h it. A ft e r a fe w d a y s , h e w a s in g r e a t p a in .

F o r th e l o s s o f a g r e a t t o e a p e r s o n r e ­ c e i v e s £860 a n d f o r th e l o s s o f a n y o t h e r t o e a p e rs o n r e c e iv e s £ 3 4 4 . S o , in a l l , i f a p e r s o n l o s t t w o t o e s - a b ig o n e a n d a l i t t l e o n e - h e w o u ld c o l l e c t a b o u t £ 1 , 2 0 0 . B u t t h e r e is n o l e g i s l a t i o n in A u s t r a l i a u n d e r w h ic h t h is m a n c a n r e c e i v e j u s t i c e . I t r i e d v e r y h a r d t o g e t h im a j o b t h r o u g h th e C o m m o n w e a l t h E m p l o y m e n t S e r v i c e . W e s u c c e e d e d in g e t t in g h im a j o b a s a c l e a n e r in o n e o f th e b i g e m p o r i u m s in S y d n e y . H e d id h i s w o r k v e r y w e l l f o r a w h il e . H e c a m e a lo n g t o s e e m e o n e d a y . I s a i d t o h i m : "H o w a r e y o u g e t t in g o n in y o u r j o b ? " H e s a id : " N o t t o o w e l l . W h e n I a m g e t t in g a r o u n d d o ­ in g m y w o r k a n d I s e e a l l th e n i c e y o u n g g i r l s a r o u n d , I g e t v e r y l o n e l y " . I s a id t o h i m : " N e v e r m in d a b o u t th e l o n e l y p a r t o f i t . A r e y o u s a t i s f i e d w ith th e j o b y o u h a v e ? " W e l l , h e w o r k e d in th a t j o b f o r a b o u t t h r e e m o n t h s a n d t h e n h e w a s put o f f . I f h e h a s t o w a lk a n y d i s t a n c e , h e h a s to s it d o w n o n th e k e r b o r th e fo o t p a t h t o r e s t . I a m n o j u d g e o f h o w h e s h o u ld f e e l a f t e r l o s i n g s u c h i m p o r t a n t t h in g s . B u t h e h a s n o c h a n c e o f g e t t in g a j o b a t th e p r e s e n t t i m e . H e w en t b e f o r e J u d ge R a in b o w , w h o d e c id e d th a t h e h a d n o t b e e n e a r n i n g h is l i v i n g b y w h a t h e h a d l o s t . T h e n e x t t h in g w a s th a t h is w i f e w a s n o t t o o p l e a s e d a b o u t t h in g s . H e d o e s n o t m in d m y s a y in g t h e s e t h i n g s , b e ­ c a u s e h e i s d e s p e r a t e . H is w i f e w a s a d v i s e d b y a l e a d i n g s o l i c i t o r in S y d n e y th a t i f s h e t o o k p r o c e e d i n g s s h e m ig h t b e a w a r d e d d a m ­ a g e s f o r l o s s o f c o n ju g a l r i g h t s . B u t , h a v in g no m o n e y , she c o u ld n ot g o to c o u r t . T h a t i s t h is u n fo r t u n a t e m a n 's p o s i t i o n a t th e p r e ­ s e n t t im e .

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