Leader's Digest #05 - 1 Apr 2018

LEADERS ISSUE 05

DIGEST

1 APRIL 2018

POWER OF MENTORING

REVERSE MENTORING – THE NEXT BIG THING?

ARE YOU READY FOR MENTORING?

The Best Kept Secret Of Corporate Coaching PG. 8 Why leaders should think twice before saying “We Are Family”!

PG. 9

This fortnightly publication is dedicated to advancing civil service leadership and putting it into practice contemporary leadership principles.

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PUBLICATION TEAM EDITORIAL

Editor-in-Chief Segaren Senior Editor Siti Rahanah Amat Dollah Assistant Editor Samson Tan Diana Marie Chapel Graphic Designer Awang Ismail bin Awang Hambali Abdul Rani Haji Adenan

Content Partners:

CONTENTS

ISSUE 5 I 1 APRIL 2018

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Reverse Mentoring - The Next Big Thing?

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Are You Ready for Mentoring?

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The Best Kept Secret of Corporate Coaching

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Why leaders should think twice before saying “We Are Family”!

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Inspirational Quotes/Jokes

THE LEADER’S DIGEST IS A FORTNIGHTLY PUBLICATION BY LEADERSHIP INSTITUTE OF SARAWAK CIVIL SERVICE FEATURING ALL THE LATEST SURROUNDING THE TOPIC OF LEADERSHIP. THE PUBLICATION ALSO FEATURES SPECIALLY SELECTED WRITE-UPS RELATED TO EACH THEME OF THE ISSUE, THROUGH ITS CONTENT PARTNERS.

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SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE NEVER REACH THEIR GOALS ALONE

M

entors help new people in a field grow into it, learn, and become experts themselves, and there is lots of research that supports this. John Crosby called mentoring “a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction.” Mentors see the strength and talent in you, listen to your hopes and dreams, and help you reach your full potential. Good ones also tell you when your plans are totally unrealistic and you need a bit of a check to that ambition. In short, good mentors foster sustainable, healthy growth. So, we all need them, right? And we should go out and get them.. or so the common wisdom says.

“I encourage all of you to seek out teachers and mentors that challenge you to think for yourself and guide you to find your own voice” — Renee Olsted

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REVERSE MENTORING – THE NEXT BIG THING?

BY PETER LAM FOR LEADERONOMICS

Traditionally, mentoring is when a seasoned person meets with a younger or new team member to educate him or her in areas where the veteran has more solid experience.

In recent years, however, spurred by the rapid advancement of technology, an alternative version of mentoring has gained prominence and is commonly referred to as reverse mentoring.

In quite a revolutionary twist, this trending practice reverses the hierarchy of traditional mentoring – the senior person becomes the primary learner and draws on the experience and knowledge of the junior person in such areas as social media, tech applications, buying and communication styles, and other millennial or even Generation Z business traits.

If implemented well, reverse mentoring can help mid- and late-career workers become better versed in new tools and processes and gain insight about a rapidly growing segment of the workforce.

In Malaysia however, a quick dipstick survey shows that awareness of such a concept remains very low and organisational plans to embark on such a programme are almost non-existent.

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Where is reverse mentoring most useful?

Questions to consider before selecting an executive coach

This practice is generally more likely to suit midsize companies and companies at the forefront of technology (telcos, gadgets and smart devices), communications (digital marketing, advertising and public relations agencies) or consulting firms.

• What is the challenge faced, or what are the developmental goals for the executive?

Reverse mentoring can also help educate leaders about diversity issues – deepening senior leaders’ understanding of the younger generation to assist in retention efforts and enrich or enhance the company culture.

• Are there other developmental options to consider?

As with anything new, there are pitfalls to watch out for, such as preventing the senior manager from slipping into dominant behaviours and ensuring junior members are empowered and feel comfortable about “speaking the truth to authority figures”.

Here are some suggested guidelines before embarking on a reverse mentoring programme: 1. Be very clear about the purpose. What learning do you want each party in the relationships to acquire and why is this important?

2. How will you gauge and evaluate the results of the programme?

3. Provide training to both parties prior to the programme. Junior mentors need to learn how to confront and challenge someone more senior in ways that stimulate reflection and open dialogue.

Senior mentees need to be trained or coached to be open and to confront their own assumptions and beliefs, and to encourage the junior mentor to be honest and forthright.

4. Select suitable candidates for both the mentor and mentee groups, and pair or match them based on their compatibility.

Finally, my advice is not to rush head-long into it. Do a small pilot, say, with six to a dozen pairs.

Allow yourself room to make and learn from mistakes, and to control damage, if any.

• Is it worth the time? Coaching and behavioural change take time and support.

• Does the executive know his or her behaviour is not what it should be?

• Is the desired outcome something the person is capable of? If the person is not suited for the position, coaching probably won’t help much.

• Are there obstacles to success that are beyond the person’s control? It may be necessary to change the system instead of the person.

• Can trust and confidentiality be ensured by all participants in the process?

• If the answers to the above questions affirm the coaching solution, the next step is to choose a coach. The coaching results will only be as good as the match between the coach and executive.

Finding a coach who has the necessary expertise and a connection with the executive is not always easy.

Several questions to ask when choosing a coach • What is this coach’s approach or process?

• Have you seen an example of a developmental plan created by the coach with a previous client?

• Does the person have a style that is compatible with the executive’s?

• Does this coach have the skills and business background required to meet the coaching objectives?

• Is the coach a person of integrity and does he or she appear to be one who can deliver the truth to the organisation and the executive?

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ARE YOU READY FOR

MENTORING?

BY EVA CHRISTODOULOU

Mentoring. A word that we hear pretty much from the beginning of our school lives, all the way to the end of our careers – and beyond that, at times. How do you make a mentor-mentee relationship work?

Well, it takes commitment from both sides – that’s for sure. Let’s have a look at the two sides of the relationship, and see how best the two can prepare for the success of this relationship and build a solid relationship from the outset.

Are you ready to be a mentor?

· Are you open to new ideas and perspectives?

Most often, we become mentors simply because our management assigns us to the role. The commitment, however, if we are to take our role seriously, should be much more than merely someone assigning us a new employee that we have to guide.

· Are you interested in challenging and helping someone to reach further?

We need to want to be a mentor, and ensure we are well-prepared for this important role we embark upon.

· Can you keep discussions confidential?

· Are you willing to share your personal knowledge and experiences?

Many mentoring relationships fail; however, we should strive for a successful one, and it all starts from the commitment of the two parties, especially the mentor.

· Are you willing to discuss personal matters as well as career dilemmas?

As a potential mentor, you need to not see this relationship as a strain on your time. You should see it as a development opportunity, and an avenue to achieve great personal satisfaction.

It could be the case that someone at work has assigned a mentor to you. In this case, you probably do not have a choice or whether you wish to have a mentor.

Being a mentor can improve your leadership skills and allow you to learn to adapt different perspectives. It will make you more open to accept alternative ways of thinking and allow you to challenge yourself, but at the same time get inspired.

If that is the case, you might as well get the most out of the experience – it might, after all, turn out to be much better than you think.

A mentor does not necessarily need to be someone at the top of his or her profession, as long as the person being mentored is at least a level below in terms of experience. That is, if we are talking about mentoring someone from the work environment.

If, on the other hand, you are mentoring someone from a different career path, you should choose to mentor someone that is at the beginning of his or her career, or a few steps behind you at least.

That way you can draw parallels with your development and provide the person with useful information and discussions.

There are a few questions you could ask yourself to determine whether you are ready to become a mentor to someone: ·Are you willing to help the person who has approached you, to develop and achieve success in their career and life? · Are you prepared to invest time and effort? · Are you a good listener and able to encourage others?

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Are you prepared to have a mentor?

If you want a mentor and are actively going out of your way to find one, then all the better.

Either way, there are a few things to consider in your journey towards finding the right mentor, and also managing the relationship in the best possible way so that you can reap the rewards.

For a start, whether imposed or by invitation, you will need to find a way to indulge and attract the attention of your mentor.

You should bear in mind that most mentors are looking for certain things from a mentoring relationship. These may include: ·A sense that they are helping someone achieve their goals and that they are making a difference in another person’s life. ·An occasional “thank you” or acknowledgement of the assistance they are providing. ·An enjoyable relationship.

As the mentee, there are a few ways to invite and sustain your mentor’s interest. ·Know what you need and want from the relationship.

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· Have clearly-defined objectives. · Identify problems you believe might be obstacles to you in reaching your objectives. · Give thought to and be able to articulate how you think a mentor can assist you. · Think about how you might reach your objectives with or without a mentor. · Be purposeful and pleasant, and have challenging goals. · Treat your mentor relationship with care; don’t abuse it by asking for inappropriate favours or information, and don’t take your mentor for granted.

Remember that in the end, you are the one responsible for your own development, in the end. As such, you should take initiative to determine your own needs, and also propose ways that your mentor could help you improve on certain aspects.

There are a number of ways to determine your needs. ·Review your last performance evaluation; were there areas in which your supervisor felt you needed more development and expertise? ·Read job descriptions or advertisements for positions you aspire to hold in the next three to five years. What skills do you already have?

What skills/experiences do you need to develop to be qualified for these positions? · List three basic needs that you have in your current position (e.g. less stress, more responsibility, more challenge, more respect). · Think about what you currently enjoy in your current situation.

What’s missing?

These deliberations would be helpful in order to have a more targeted approach during your sessions with your mentor, and to even identify the right mentor for you, if you have the luxury of having choices.

Developing the right skills as a mentee

As a mentee, there are certain skills you will need to develop to make the most out of your mentoring experience.

Asking questions

Since mentoring sessions aim to help the mentee more than the mentor, you should learn how to ask the right questions. If not, you will end up getting only the information the mentor is offering, which might not necessarily answer all your queries.

Make sure you learn the art of asking the right questions. It is not about simply coming up with a long list of thoughtless questions – make them really work for you by figuring out what you need to ask to get the information you want.

Listening skills

To truly use listening to your advantage, you need to put in a bit more effort than usual. Aim to listen to – and understand- every word your mentor shares with you. Their time is valuable, and so

is yours. So do not waste it by not really taking 100% from your sessions together.

Follow your mentor’s pace of speaking, and follow his/her thought process. Aim to analyse everything they say – how it all connects, how it relates to you or the question you just asked.

Make sure you summarise and repeat thoughts to them, in order to ensure you truly understood their points, and come up with ways you could apply this in your situation (your career or dilemma at the moment or in the future).

Remember that this process may take some time. You may only be able to think of the applications after your session is over – but it would be great if at the beginning of your next session, or perhaps via email, you let your mentor know you have been thinking of what they said, and share your plan for execution with them.

Reflection after your sessions and following up on those thoughts is perhaps the most powerful skill you could learn for mentoring relationships.

Building trust

A mentoring relationship is based on trust. As such, you need to ensure you work hard towards gaining your mentor’s trust, just like you‘ll take some time to trust them in return.

You need to show them that you are not taking advantage of the relationship by wasting their time, or spreading information they share with you around.

Be very wary, therefore, of what is important to your mentor, and respect their time and expertise. At the end of the day, if they are sharing some confidential information with you it’s for your own benefit, so repay them by keeping it to yourself.

Resolving differences

Even though your mentor is possibly older than yourself, and definitely of a higher rank in the organisation (or community), remember that you have the right to express yourself, and that you have a right to shape the path that your relationship and the mentoring process are taking.

That being said, you need to ensure you do so professionally, in a manner that is appropriate and respectful. Find a way to address any differences diplomatically and politely, by not aggressively accusing them of not doing something right.

I do hope this brief guide can give you some starting points for considering how you can enter, or if you are already in one, sustain, a mentor-mentee relationship.

Whatever your role in such a relationship, remember that you both need to work hard, be open to new ideas that may come your way, and make the most of it while respecting your counterpart.

Happy connecting, and may you find a meaningful and nurturing relationship with your mentor/mentee.

Eva Christodoulou is part of Leaderonomics’ Corporate Services team. If your organisation is ready for mentoring relationships, we can help. For more information, contact people@leaderonomics.com. If you enjoyed reading this article, click here for more!

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The Besett of Kept SeecCroaching Corporat PH TAN

BY JOSE

WHY SHOULD SELF-MADE CORPORATE LEADERS REQUIRE COACHING? If leaders are made and not born, who or what makes them? Many leaders take pride that it is their own hands coupled with guts and grit which form the success which they experience today.

Why then should successful corporate leaders require coaching when most of them should be coaching others?

Why should a capable leader pay good money to listen to an outsider telling him or her how to run the business or manage his or her life?

Here’s the best-kept secret of corporate coaching: Corporate leaders who are looking for sustainable success have a regular sounding board which reminds them that there is no such thing as a well-rounded leader.

From a BBC interview with Usain Bolt after he won the 100m final, we learnt that Bolt is not a good starter. He’d been worrying about this, trying to improve his start, trying to react quicker and get out of the blocks ahead of his rivals. And all this worry was tensing him up and making him run worse.

Until his coach said to him:

“Forget about the start. You’ll beat them when you get into your stride. For you, it is the second half of the race that matters.”

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And when he realised that, and let go of the desire to put everything right, he was fine. More than fine: he was 9.63 seconds.

Many leaders are worried about not being a good enough “starter”, constantly trying to improve gaps and weaknesses. While we cannot neglect weaknesses, the coaching focus should be on strengths – just like the type of coaching that Bolt received.

Leaders who focus on their strengths and create opportunities every day are six times more engaged and three times as likely to have a higher quality of life in general.

As a leader, here’s the best question you can ask yourself today: Do I have a strengths-based coach who has an objective and scientifically-validated approach to amplify my strengths instead of constantly focusing on my weakness?

Each of us has a race to run.

To run (and finish) this race well, we cannot afford to be distracted by our weaknesses. Any help we can get which focuses on our strengths is well worth the investment of time and effort.

Joseph Tan is CEO of Leaderonomics Good Monday. His passion is to work with performance-focused leaders to capture the hearts and minds of their employees through a strengths-based and accountability-driven approach. Much of what is shared in the article above comes from his work as a Gallup-certified strengths coach. If you would like to engage him to enhance the engagement level of your organisation, email training@leaderonomics.com for more details.

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Is it always a good thing for people in the organisation to be like a family?

“I don’t want us to be like family anymore at work. Rather, I want everyone to feel we are a professional football team.” Declared the newly appointed CEO of a large Asian conglomerate during their first Town Hall meeting. I was sitting in the room as an observing coach.

WHY LEADERS SHOULD THINK TWICE BEFORE SAYING

‘WE ARE FAMILY’!

BY DR. THUN THAMRONGNAWASAWAT

The room went quiet. The organisation was a 100-year-old Chinese descendant company, whose traditions were rich with relationship and togetherness. Yet, here was the leader of their pack, challenging that very notion.

“The problem with being a family is that we are obligated to carry others. If you have a brother who fails to get his act together, or if you have a fellow worker who is not minding his responsibilities, you have to take care of him no matter what. Even if it means repeatedly covering for his absence and doing his work for him.

Because he is family” The room was now in total silence. More than a few heads were nodding involuntarily. “In a professional sports team, every function in the organisation has its responsibility. The club manages sales, marketing, and other corporate affairs. The manager makes plans to draw out the team’s potential. And the players give their best to execute and deliver the results – to compete successfully with competition.”

“Let me make one thing clear today. Under my leadership, those who don’t fulfil their obligations will be leaving; much like players who are transferred out of the team at the end of season.” “We need to take care of business; not just each other.” He concluded crisply.

While many people may think that the CEO’s message was rather stern and cold – and I don’t personally agree with his standing – he did raise an interesting point for further thoughts: Is being ‘a family’ always a good thing at work?

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Dr. Laurie Kramer, a researcher at the University of Illinois, set up a campaign in 2008 called ‘More Fun with Sisters and Brothers’ to teach children how to make their life with siblings more fun and happy. For example, the program taught activities they could all enjoy together, how to resolve conflicts in a way that benefits everyone, techniques to control emotions and persuade others.

Unsurprisingly, the course had parents with more than one child, like myself, queuing up in hope to enroll their kids.

Non-parents or parents of a single child may wonder why such intervention is even necessary. After all, siblings are naturally best friends to each other, aren’t they? Please excuse our collective laughter; as we know from personal experience that the logic of nature rarely works that way. Over the decade, my wife and I have lost counts how many occasions we suffered through the kids fighting each other. Sometimes we couldn’t help but wonder whether they might get along better with friends than they do their own brother/sister.

Dr. Kramer discussed an interesting hypothesis in her study – which was captured in the book titled Nurtureshock: Why Everything We Thought About Children is Wrong by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman (2009, Ebury Press). The reason siblings fight with each other more than with friends is because, deep down the kids know that family is a ‘given’. This means no matter how badly they treat each other, they will always be brother and sister. “This explains why siblings don’t have to worry about courtesy or self-control and can just go all out. An entirely different scenario from friends which pose a worry that they may be refused from association” said the American researcher.

Leadership Insights

1.

Family may not be the final answer I often heard members spoke of their organisational culture as “We Are A family”. However, one couldn’t help but wonder whether an organisation operating like a family completely works. Is it possible that sometimes ‘feeling at home’ may render your employee sloppy from proper conduct in society? Could it give them a false sense of security?

After all, home is where you can just throw your used socks in the corner, leave your dishes in the sink, or even stay in your pajamas all day playing video games. Sometimes our house is the sanctum where one doesn’t have to be mindful of others. Do we really want our organisation to be a place like that?

2. Mind the net balance of your family. Despite the research, many

In July 2017, a Director was caught embezzling more than 1 million dollars from a not-for-profit organisation. He used it to buy personal items like 6 cars, house loans, utilities, contractors, and even groceries. Intriguing, however, was the fact that his secretary logged these expenses for over 5 years but never said a word.

When she finally came forward she said, “He was like a family to us.

Nobody thought he could do such a thing.”

of us still feel that working amongst family is a great thing. “I grew up with my siblings and I think it’s great. We had fights and all, sure, but we still love each other.” But researchers point out that to feel that way we need to evaluate our family experience by its net balance. This means we need to take all the shared good moments such as going on trips, exchanging stories, or protecting each other from harm, then subtract from them the bad ones such as fights, unpaid debts, conflict of interests, or even backstabbing. If the ‘family net balance’ is still positive, then your experience as siblings would likely be a plus. But I’m sure we wouldn’t have to look far to find families whose net balance is a minus. Where is yours? And how can you shift it towards the positive?

After looking at these studies, I couldn’t help but reminisce on what the CEO said that afternoon.

3. Get to a win-win outcome. The key challenge for leaders is to get

Another research, this one by Dr. Ganie Dehart of State University of New York (SUNY), found that children play pranks on and fight with their siblings 7 times more than with friends!

“I don’t want us working like family because with family, you have to carry each other unconditionally. However, business does not work that way. You have to pull your weight, or be left behind.”

We may not agree 100% with his thinking. But perhaps it renders a chance to reflect on ours?

to an ‘And’ not an ‘Or’. To the CEO above, working like a sport team is good because it has clear measurements for output and even a penalty system that keeps employee from being lax. However, the downside is that his organisation may become more focused on the forebrain of reason, without the emotional energy of the hindbrain. The team will go through the motions of delivering on its duties with the head but without the heart. What’s missing will be the companionship of a family; a sense of belonging; the spirit of All for One and One for All. How then, can you find a way to get the best of both worlds, making your employees work as a community with disciplines and codes of conduct in an environment that has love, generosity, and bonding akin to that of siblings? We may not yet know the path – but knowing the destination is already a good start.

So, is it always a good thing for people in the organisation to feel like family? I’ll leave that for you to decide.

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Inspirational Quotes

The Way tO Get Started Is To Quit Talking And Begin Doing.

- Walt Disney -

Don’t Let Yesterday Take Up Too Much Of Today.

- Will Rogers -

If You Are Working On Something That You Really Care About, You Don’t Have To Be Pushed. The Vision Pulls You. - steve job -

Jokes

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BUILDING LEADERS OF EXCELLENCE Proposed new campus facility for Leadership Institute of Sarawak Civil Service at Rampangi, Santubong

LEADERSHIP INSTITUTE OF SARAWAK CIVIL SERVICE KM20, JALAN KUCHING SERIAN, SEMENGGOK, 93250 KUCHING, SARAWAK. TELEPHONE : +6082-625166 FAX : +6082-625966 E-mail : info@leadinstitute.com.my