GRANDPARENTS PARENTING GRANDCHILDREN: Celebrating the Unseen Heroes

STACY SANCHEZ WITH AMBER WEIGAND-BUCKLEY

Stacy Sanchez never thought her golden years would be spent this way.

She and her husband had plans—a quaint retirement by the beach, mornings spent sipping coffee and evenings filled with peace. But everything changed when Child Protective Services dropped off her seven-year-old grandson with nothing but a small bag and a shattered heart.

“We opened the door, and there he was,” Stacy recalls. “All the trauma, all the pain he’d endured—it was right there in his eyes. And I knew everything about our lives was about to change.”

Wounds Too Big to Bare

Parenting again meant more than routines—it meant addressing deep scars of neglect and abandonment inflicted by his mother, Stacy’s adopted daughter.

“Loving him wasn’t enough,” Stacy admits. “No matter how much we poured into him, the wounds he carried ran deeper than anything we could reach.”

Her grandson’s pain often surfaced as self-harm. Stacy recalls finding his arms covered in cuts. “When I asked him why, he said, ‘It’s easier to feel pain on my skin than in my heart.’ Those words broke me.”

When Love Isn’t Enough

After years of trying, Stacy and her husband realized their grandson needed help they couldn’t give. “It was one of the hardest decisions we’ve ever made,” she says. “We sent him to a mental health facility across the country. It felt like we were failing him, but deep down, we knew it was the only way he could get the help he needed.”

Letting go was an act of surrender—one born of faith. “I had to release him into God’s hands,” Stacy shares. “I prayed, ‘Lord, I can’t heal him, but You can.’ And I still believe that with all my heart.

Hurdles to Forgiveness

As much as Stacy shows unconditional love for her grandson, she admits she’s still struggling to forgive her adopted daughter for the pain she inflicted on him. “She’s working out her testimony,” Stacy says carefully. “That’s the only way I can put it right now.”

Her daughter’s choices—substance abuse, neglect, and abandonment—ripped through the family like a storm.

“I don’t know if I’ll ever fully understand why she made her choices,” Stacy says. “And I’m not at the point where I can say I’ve forgiven her. I’m still working through that with God.”

Parenting … Again?!!: A Mission of Hope

“This is a growing reality,” Stacy Sanchez explains. “Across the U.S., 2.7 million grandparents, like me, are stepping into raising their grandchildren, often without the additional support available to foster families.”

Despite the challenges, Stacy and her husband have found purpose in their journey, transforming their struggles into a mission to support others. Stacy founded the Parenting ... Again?!! community, a safe space where grandparents raising grandchildren can share stories, find resources, and connect with others who understand their journey.

“Grandparents like us are missionaries to the next generation,” Stacy says. “We’re not just raising kids; we’re raising hope. These children—and their grandparents—are worth investing in.”

She urges churches and communities to step in and offer practical support, such as:

• Support groups to create safe spaces for sharing and encouragement.

• Respite care with teams to offer babysitting breaks.

• Tutoring and mentoring for academic and emotional support.

• Host workshops on parenting challenges like technology and trauma care.

• Create a resource hub with information on local services.

• Include grandfamilies in church missions budgets for vital support.

Learning to Breathe

Stacy’s faith has been her anchor through every step of this journey. She recalls a moment when she was at her lowest, face down on the floor, unable to even cry out in prayer. “I heard God say, ‘Breathe to the rhythm of My love.’ One breath at a time, He carried me through.”

Though her grandson is still in treatment, Stacy remains committed. “I don’t know how this story will end, but I trust the Author and keep showing up, loving, and breathing.”

To other grandparents facing similar challenges, Stacy offers this: “It’s okay to admit this may be too much for you to handle. God never asks us to carry these burdens alone. He sees you. He loves you. And He will sustain you, one breath at a time.

Check out Stacy’s Facebook: Grandparents: Parenting, Again? Perspectives on Parenting Grands and find more resources and freebies on her website stacysanchez.com.