Life Letter
THE
LoveBird’s Unpopular Opinion on Relationships
Let’s Talk! The Rising Trend of Polygamy The Life Letter April 1, 2022. Copyright Lovebird Publishing LLC
APRIL EDITION 2022
THE LIFE LETTER
TABLE OF CONTENTS INSPIRATION...........3
HEALTH & WELLNESS.......15
LOVEBIRD’S LETTER
LET’S TALK POLYGAMY
Lovebird’s Prayer
This or That? Recipes!
HOT TOPICS......................6
LIFE LITERATURE................21
LOVEBIRD’S UNPOPULAR OPINIONS
All about issuu.com
Friendship Checklist
LoveBird’s Book Recommendation
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Recap Our Services on YOUTUBE @ River City Church Chicago 25
THE LIFE LETTER
LoveBird’s Letter
A lot of what I know about relationships is what I learned through trial and error. Much like you, I have gained my best lessons through my most painful life experiences. Before you assume I know nothing about pain, because my front covers are plastered with pictures of me always smiling, let me tell you this. When I was 16, I had a pregnancy scare that scared the hell out of me. I was literally born again after that happened. By 18 I had my first true love and I was a good solider fighting alongside him as he battled cancer. He won, but it was a long scary fight, during high school I might add. By 19 I started dating what I thought would be my forever love, but it turned out to be another dud. I was pregnant and married at 20, divorced and single by 21. This happened in front of what seemed to be everyone. Iyanla’s producers even called me to come on the show to air my dirty laundry because my ex-husband was openly gay. What a show that would have been, I’m glad I said no thanks. You see, that’s the condensed version. In order for you to know the whole story, you would have to read the book, I am currently thinking of writing. In all of what I experienced one thing I take pride in, is being brave enough to love again. I don’t cower when it comes to being vulnerable. I don’t shrink when it’s time to trust. I know what it feels like to come crashing down, and honestly I am not as afraid of the fall anymore. Don’t get me wrong it’s still petrifying, but it won’t stop me from trying. I hope that as you read and enjoy this issue you will become brave. You will gain some tools to apply to your life, and not just in your love life. I hope that your love life will be redefined to include everyone you love. I want to see you thrive in your friendships, business relationships, family life, and romantic relationships. I truly believe that your ‘love life’ can be just ‘life.’ For wherever you are love abounds.
-LoveBird4
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THE BUSINESS DIRECTORY
THE LIFE LETTER
HOT TOPICS 11
THE LIFE LETTER
LoveBird’s Unpopular Opinions SUBMISSION... This word ruffles pretty much everyone’s feathers. I however, have welcomed this principle into my life in more ways than one. Everyone has their opinion about the supposed dangers and risks that come with submission. No one wants to be under the thumb of someone else, laying as a doormat or losing their voice and identity. Somehow, all of these things have become what people associate with submission. I am the first to admit that these are valid concerns. However, one should only be leery of submission when you submit to the wrong person. If you submit yourself to the right person, submission can be beneficial to your quality of life. Whether it’s in business partnerships, romantic relationships, or friendships submission, if done right, brings peace of mind. I have found out firsthand peace is a virtue I don’t
RELATIONSHIPS want to live without anymore, and submission grants me that. Submission is surrender. When I submit, I get to relieve myself of added pressure. It is freeing to recognize someone else’s strength and honor their ability by giving them an opportunity to handle something I most likely didn’t want to handle anyway. In other words, allowing someone else to take something off my plate is the biggest benefactor of submission. In order to submit to anyone, a sturdy foundation of trust must be established. I recognize that is a major challenge for some. Even in that, I would question if trust is the main issue, then why be connected with that person in the first place? I would venture to argue that submission would come easy if we were connected to the right people. Let’s focus on business partnerships first. If you were to go into business with a partner you felt wasn’t capable of meeting the demand of entrepreneurship, would you be eager to submit and surrender operations over to them? Most likely not. You probably would fear things would unravel, so taking charge would be the wiser choice. However, this friend is a whiz at getting eye catching marketing out to customers. 7
THE LIFE LETTER
Knowing this, you could submit and yield marketing over to your business partner, with no worries. In a committed relationship, especially marriage, submission works in similar ways. One spouse may be better in managing finances, while the other specializes in maintaining the by: on LoveBird home. While the agreed upon roles can and oftentimes will change based varying circumstances, it is assuring to have the freedom of submission. I can say with conviction submission, if implemented in the right relationship, grants true freedom. Freedom from having to handle all things on my own. Freedom from carrying the weight of life alone. Freedom from having to always be strong. Submission lifts burdens and gifts assistance. Some might think that it’s easier to just handle all things yourself to assure it all gets done. However that line of thinking is more of a trauma response rather than confidence speaking. Constantly expecting someone to let you down is no way to live. Looking for disappointment to come from the people closest to you, is not healthy either. If you have to wonder about their intentions for you, that is a sure sign that they may not qualify to have access to you. This may sound harsh, but I would advise you to choose better. Choose better friendships, life partners, mentors, leaders and spouses. In order to choose better you must first submit yourself to the almighty God, for He alone is capable to leading you to capable people. If you find it hard to submit to his sovereignty, then I can see how it can be unsettling for you to submit to his creation. He created the order for life. He is the supreme being and man submits to him. Woman submits to man, and the children submit to them. This is a very traditional stance and I understand that everyone will not see it this way. I had to mention it because I am evidence that it works. It may not work for all people, but it is an effective way to establish order within a family unit. If you wish to rebuttal against my unpopular opinion, please email me at lovebirdpublishing1@gmail.com and have your rebuttal featured in the next edition! 8
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FRIENDSHIP INVENTORY CHECKLIST Have they proven to be reliable and trustworthy? Proverbs 18:24 Were they there for you in your time of need? Proverbs 17:17 Do they possess a true lasting love for you, that can be tested? John 15: 12-13 Can they pray for you? Job 16:20-21 Do they give sound advice from God’s word? Proverbs 27:9 Are you unified in purpose and life? Psalms 133:1 Can they encourage you? 1 Thessalonians 5:11 Do they honor who you are? Romans 12:10 Are they quick to forgive? Colossians 3:13 Do they mind working to help you achieve a goal? Ecclesiastes 4:9
Are they capable of carrying your burdens? Galatians 6:2 Do they have respect for you and others? Luke 6:31 Are they careful in choosing other connections? Proverbs 12:26 Do they make you better? Proverbs 27:17 Can they correct you in love? Proverbs 27:5-6 Do they share your faith? Matthew 18:20 Are they devoted to your friendship? Ruth 1:17 Are they agreeable? Amos 3:3 Can they celebrate your wins? Romans 12:15 Can they respect your boundaries? Proverbs 25:17
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THE THE LIFE LIFE LETTER LETTER
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Gated Community by LoveBird I admit that I once had a horrible habit of reviving dry bones left by the ghosts of relationships past. Resurrecting them in a silly attempt to salvage what I could convince myself was valuable. Rehashing old tired memories, dressing them up as new opportunities for growth. Realizing that I was incapable of recreating anything, regretting that nothing there was redeemable. I confess I grew bitter by reliving cycles that I thought I was strong enough to break alone. Betting my bottom dollar on lost causes. Barricading any logic in the back of my mind, as to let my emotions roam freely. Banishing my heart to a gladiators den to die. I accept that I sacrificed my soul’s satisfaction in exchange for a cheap love, that never quite filled my cup. Oftentimes I was left yearning for an invisible request to be met from someone that was simply unwilling to try, or unable. Unstable in all my ways, trying desperately to perform a balancing act of other peoples opinions, feelings, and intentions. Neglecting myself, my thoughts, my needs, to assure my actions were suitable, up to par with the overwhelming demand of outside sources. But, I am unlearning all of that. I am becoming braver. I speak up more, even if it takes me a few tries. My heart is finding its voice. My voice, though sometimes shaky is sure. Boundaries are still a work in progress, much like my homemade chocolate chip cookies, but I won’t stop trying. I owe myself this precious gift of yes. And I’m handing out more No’s than usual, that progress! And I am proud of that. My heart is no longer a highway holding countless visitors flying in and out, on and off. It’s more like a gated community, warm, welcoming, and lovingly guarded.
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THE LIFE LETTER
Is Social Media Ruining Your Social Skills? Take This Quiz and See for Yourself! 1. I prefer to text rather than take a call. 2. I speak fluent emoji. 3. I can abbreviate most of what I say on social media. 4. I can’t go very long without checking instagram. 5. Scrolling on Tik-Tok gives me a rush! 6. I have more subscriptions than I am willing to admit. 7. It has been a month since I went out without posting. 8. I celebrate my birthday by doing a photoshoot for social media. 9. It’s been over a month since I lived in the moment. 10.Twitter is my news network. 11. If TMZ posted it, then it must be true. 12.My parents always tell me I’m on the phone too much. 13.I eat with my phone at the dinner table. 14.My children have phones or tablets they use often.
15.I check all of my notifications, but my voicemail is full. 16. I have social anxiety. 17.I get uncomfortable around new crowds and I turn to my phone for security. 18. I avoid people I follow on social media in public places. 19. I am super weird when I checkout with a cashier. 20.I prefer self-checkout so I won’t have to talk to anyone. 21. Small talk is exhausting. 22. I revert to scrolling in my apps when I am waiting. 23.I have ran into inanimate objects in public because I was on my phone. 24.I have ran into a person while I was on my phone. 25. All of my other accounts online are directly linked to my Facebook account, because I will never sign out.
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Great News, You’re pretty Normal!
Be Careful! You are starting to scare me!
Congrats! You are a Certified Psycho! LOL 14
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HEALTH & WELLNESS
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THE LIFE LETTER
Let’s Talk! The Rising Trend of Polygamy Polygamy- marriage in which a spouse of either sex may have more than one mate at the same time. (Merriam-Webster). Before I give my argument on this topic I want to clearly define the term. Oftentimes we mix up our feelings when it comes to definitions of words, but that’s another short essay for another time. Let me start by saying I believe that polygamy, is not a suitable lifestyle for a born again believer of Jesus Christ. I also want to make it clear, I understand my faith does not dictate the morality for all people. Now that I have established those facts, let’s discuss why polygamy is on the rise. Well, for one it’s popular on social media. Social media platforms bring amplified awareness to the culture and philosophy of polygamy. It is as simple as, people within this community informing the masses why this could work for them, what the benefits are, and how to decipher if you can be apart of the community. It’s like what evangelism is for Christians. Many people can see and understand the logic behind joining a polygamous relationship. Having multiple incomes, having in house help with rearing children, building a community around teamwork are all sensible reasons why this kind of lifestyle would be beneficial for some. With the rising costs of everything essential, it seems logical even to me to have a little extra help in the home. While, I wouldn’t go about it that way, it makes sense financially. Utah, has lowered the legal penalty for polygamy, being a state that holds the largest polygamous community in the country. Traditional Mormons usually practice polygamy and have been doing so in Utah for decades. According to bustle.com there are approximately 50,000 polygamists in this country, however since it is still illegal, many polygamists don’t openly share that information with the federal government. This estimated number could only represent a fraction of the polygamists community in the U.S.
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continued from pg. 16
Polygamy has been coupled with a wave of African spirituality within the black community. Many black people have a more accepting view of polygamy when they are in pursuit of their cultural identity and tribal affiliation. For instance, if a black person from the U.S. or. a descendant of the Atlantic Slave Trade traces their lineage back to a specific African tribe that practices polygamy, they oftentimes have a more favorable view. The pride of belonging makes it easier for them to accept this as part of their history and they may be driven to adopt the lifestyle to honor themselves and their ancestors. Another reason polygamy is on the rise, because it is more favorable than infidelity. Having an open and honest agreement between all parties involved is more favorable in the eyes of modern society at large. People would rather know and be involved in open relationships, than to be deceived by their partners. Open relationships have created a safe gate for active polygamists to live their preferred lifestyle under the guise of labeling it as an open relationship. Thus, escaping the wrath of the federal government. If we are being honest, many people like the idea of having multiple sex partners. There are many unconventional lifestyles in the U.S. that people are interested to try. The sexual curiosity of some individuals lead them to experiment sexually in an attempt to find out more about themselves. It is only right to note many notable polygamists on social media, like Kevin Wesley stress that polygamy is not about having a lot of sex, rather than building a stronger family unit and community to build legacy for future generations. So in considering all of these aspects of polygamy, one could understand why the trend is continually growing. At this point, the polygamous community doesn’t represent even one percent of the U.S. population. While it is currently on the rise, it has not reached a level where legalities can or should be challenged. Currently, polygamy is illegal in all 50 states, and carry strict policies for violations. This being a major deterrent for most outside of other religious beliefs and morals. So, what do I have to say about all of this? The morality of this lifestyle is the biggest red flag for me personally. I wouldn’t want to share my purpose partner with anyone else, but I do understand why someone outside of my faith would think twice about it. Even if I was not a devout Christian I know this lifestyle wouldn’t work for me, but in a crumbling society, I cannot fault someone for trying new things to find happiness and security. I do however have a better recommendation! 18
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THIS or THAT
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Lovebird’s Book Recommendation for APRIL!!
THE LIFE LETTER
It is currently available on AMAZON!!! Prayer is personal conversation between you and God. God desires to converse with you freely, unguarded, daily, throughout the day, as much as possible. This first book in Glinda's series of "It's Not That Hard," addresses the difficulties that many people encounter when trying to develop a prayer life with God. These difficulties many times result in many giving up on praying, and concluding that God knows their heart, therefore they don't need to pray. This book is a short, effective, get to the point, biblically based tool that is going to change your attitude and your outlook on prayer. 23
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LIFE LITERATURE SECTION BUSINESS DIRECTORY: ChariseDenise
Real Estate Agent: ST. Clair &
Home Decor & Luxury Plant Decor
Madison Counties ILLINOIS
FB & IG @cherisedenise
phone: 618-691-8352
cherisedenise.com
email: kimberly.crumble@exprealty.com
Chi Chi Boutique
website:
Fashion Boutique
kimberlycrumble.exprealty.com
FB @Chi Chi Boutique IG @chi_chiboutique
Luxury Yacht Life Luxury Yacht Experience
EyeVision Photography
IG @yacht_dreamz
Photographer
theyachtexperience.com
FB EyeVision Photography IG @eyevisionfotos
Sexy Black Products
eyevisionphotos.com
Beauty & Skin Care Brand FB Mary Cleark
Henry Williams Love Foundation
search #sexyblkproducts
Nonprofit Organization
DM for more information
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815-797-9333 Kimberly Crumble Realtor
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LIFE LITERATURE SECTION from pg. 24 BUSINESS DIRECTORY: continued Ascending Essentials: LAUNCHING SOON
Honest Guys Heating & Cooling
Beauty & Skincare Brand
Professional HVAC Company
FB @LavishEssentials20
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Brianna Je’ Artistry
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Visual Arts & Beauty Brand FB @UltimatelySkilledbyGOD
Megg’s Kitchen: LAUNCHING SOON
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Catering Company meggan_harris@yahoo.com
Cover’d Customs Custom Clothing & Consultation Brand FB & IG @coveredcustoms coveredclothingandcustoms@gmail.com Empowering YOUNG Lives Early Learning
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Private School
Beauty, cosmetic, and personal care
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Follow on FB @Empowering YOUNG Lives
FB & IG @sydnielaurynbeauty
Early Childhood Academy
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Fashioned Brand Lifestyle and Clothing Brand
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FB & IG @fashionedbrand fashnd.com sales@fashnd.com
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A 30 DAY DEVOTIONAL
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DESCRIBING MY LIFE'S STORY
WRITTEN BY
Father God, We thank you for being such a gift to our lives. You are our source for all things. Because we believe you have everything we need, please Lord lead us to the right people. Our desire is to be equally yolked in every relationship so our destiny can be fulfilled, and our you can get your glory. In Jesus name, Amen
Life Letter
THE
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The Life Letter. April 1, 2022 Copyright Lovebird Publishing LLC
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