Finding Faith

Adult convert Joseph Jarvis tells the story of his journey to the Traditional Latin Mass

“Jarvis! You’re a heathen and a heretic. You’re going to burn in hell!” people and the laity read lessons and gave out communion, which I received standing and in the hand.

These were the exact words of my religious education teacher, a vicar, at Secondary school in the 1980s. I was born in Norfolk in the 1970s and raised without a faith. My parents and I had discussed Religious Education, and decided to withdraw me from lessons. Our family only attended church for baptisms, weddings and funerals and ‘celebrated’ Christmas, although not as I do now.

In 1999, I went up to Cambridge University. It was there that my landlady introduced me to the Anglican Communion. In 2006, after some time deliberating, I decided - or accepted - to be baptised. Shortly after, I became drawn to the Catholic Church of Our Lady and English Martyrs, Cambridge. It was there I sensed a presence I had previously not encountered elsewhere, and a Catholic housemate accompanied me to occasional services.

After returning to Norfolk in 2010, and while still attending Anglican services, I encountered a Catholic couple who introduced me to their local parish church. After preparation with the priest, I was received into full communion in 2013.

At the same time a friend introduced me to the Traditional Latin Mass. I attended several Masses, although, on reflection, I didn’t see the appeal and struggled to engage. I couldn’t always hear what the priest was saying, nor did I understand Latin. Maybe I felt that God was distant and unapproachable.

I considered the TLM old-fashioned and even exclusive and continued to attend the Novus Ordo Mass. However, I began to sense something confusing and disorienting within the liturgy especially that the priest faced the

When attending Mass was restricted during lockdown, I viewed live-streamed Masses from the shrine of Our Lady of Walsingham. During one weekend in June 2020, Mass was celebrated in the newer Chapel of Reconciliation. The following day, because of maintenance, Mass was celebrated in the older Slipper Chapel. I was immediately engaged in a new way. The position of the altar meant the priest could only celebrate facing the altar. It was when the priest uttered “Sursum Corda,” that something clicked. I’ll never forget it. I was motivated to research the Mass, as well as Church history and liturgy.

The more I engaged with the Traditional Latin Mass, the more I sensed a need for personal adjustment. Perhaps I could best describe it as the awakening of an inner life. The deeper my involvement, the more I questioned my engagement with the Novus Ordo Mass, as well as my preconceptions of the TLM being out-dated.

At around this time my work became more difficult and I was diagnosed with autism. Family and relationship difficulties became difficult and this became one of the most challenging periods in my life. What sustained me through these storms was the Mass, and especially the Traditional Latin Mass. The beauty, music and mystery of the Latin Mass, the obvious sense of orientation, redressed the disorientation in day-to-day life. The order, calm, focus, and stillness of the Traditional Latin Mass has led to an increasingly close, personal, and intimate relationship with God.

Attending the Traditional Latin Mass also inspired an appreciation of Traditional prayers and practices. I now prioritise prayer. I was introduced to the Missal in Latin and English, and also the Breviary. Along with these came books on the spiritual life by Saints and Doctors of the Church. Praying the Holy Rosary has become a daily practice too.

I’ve taken part in TLM pilgrimages and have met and formed good relationships with other Catholics – from a diversity of backgrounds – both locally and from across the world.

I pray for the protection and promotion of the Mass of the Ages. Deo gratias.

If you are a convert, recent or otherwise, and would like to tell your story, do send it to us. Around 700 words and with a hi-res jpg photograph if possible. Send your story to tom.quinn@lms.org.uk