Update from the Chuenchums! May 2024

the chuenchums in thailand may 2024

SPRITE & KRISTEN CHUENCHUM SERVING FAMILIES ACROSS THAILAND WITH

happy mother’ s day!

to all of you incredible mothers and those who mother everyone around them - we celebrated you this month!

dear friends & family,

The Thai word for “mother” uses a vowel that we don’t really have in the English language. It’s sort of a drawn out version if you were to say “meh” but longer. Over the past decade of living in Thailand, I’ve heard of and learned of new ways of being a mother. Thai women have taught me the art of mothering everybody. It is an art when you can lovingly and sternly scold your neighbor about the clothes they are wearing or the food they are eating in such a way that actually makes you feel loved and cared for. Such is how I have found Thai mothers to be

This year was my first Mother’s Day that I celebrated as a mom of my own child. And while that felt significant in my own journey, I couldn’t help but think of all of the women who have “mothered” me –both those whom I am related to and those I am not.

Three mothers in particular came to mind that you can read about on the next pages. They are women Sprite and I have known and loved dearly. They are women who have scolded us in their own motherly way. They are women who have known hardship and struggle and have persevered through impossible heartaches They are some of our heroes.

These three women represent in some fashion a facet of our work right now and what we hope to do in the future.

Join us as we prayerfully consider as a community how we may best serve mothers like Mae Ang, Mae Jay and Mae Bee.

mae ang

Back when Sprite and I lived in Samakki, one of our neighbors went by the name “Ang”. In Thai we add on Mae or “mother” before anyone who invites us to call them that – but usually it’s someone around our own mother’s age and definitely a term of affection. Mae Ang wasn’t much taller than me (Kristen) and had sort of a stalky figure and the kindest brown eyes. She was a member of our church back then.

When I asked Mae Ang one time how she had become a Christian she explained that she started by reading the Psalms. She said she learned about God and who He was through the cries of the psalmist. It was an unusual gateway into Christianity, in my opinion, knowing how dark and dramatic some of the psalms could be. But as I learned Mae Ang’s story, I began to understand.

Mae Ang had lived a hard life. She was faithfully (stubbornly) married to an alcoholic man with whom she had two children with. Her daughter lived in the same community and was the worship leader in our church. She sang the most beautiful rendition of “How Great Thou Art” at mine and Sprite’s wedding. Mae Ang worked a physically demanding job as a cleaner and was the sole provider for her family. Unlike many other Christians I’d met in Thailand, once Mae Ang became a Christian, she never wavered. She showed up to church every Sunday with something delicious she had made to share for lunch She prayed faithfully and endured every hardship knowing God was right by her side (a byproduct of her studies of the Psalms, I’m assuming).

Mae Ang is someone Sprite and I lovingly refer to now as a “hidden figure”. The term comes from a fantastic movie with that title about the group of African American female mathematicians who were behind much of NASA’s success sending a man to space. Mae Ang may not be a mathematician but her humility, her faith, her compassion, and her practical servanthood make her a brilliant mother to everyone who met her. She mothered her own daughter and grandchildren well but beyond that was always ready to serve her community in some small way She was never flashy or showy Just steady and obedient and safe Her presence in our little community made the street she lived on a safer place – always. Children knew to behave when they walked past. Adults knew she was trustworthy. She oozed faithfulness and stability and the entire community benefited from it.

As Sprite and I have been dreaming about how to bring family strengthening tools to the community level, leaders like Mae Ang come to mind often and we’re wrestling with how we could empower more mothers like her to help care for vulnerable children in their communities.

Join us as we pray for more “hidden figures” like Mae Ang to bless communities, families, and children.

For those of you who have partnered with us for a long time, you’ll remember Mae Jay well. Mae Jay was my (Kristen’s) host mom when I first moved to Thailand 12ish years ago. Mae Jay opened up her home and welcomed me in for those first two weeks after I landed in Thailand. I didn’t speak a word of Thai and Mae Jay didn’t speak a word of English. We communicated mostly through big, giant hand gestures those two weeks of living together. Mae Jay is also the woman who gave me my Thai nickname that’s stuck all of these years – “May-Sah” which means “April”.

The more I understood Thai, the more I learned about Mae Jay – her story, her family, her life She was a wonderful cook (which I did learn on day one) and she would lovingly host me at her house for dinner regularly. I didn’t understand it at the time, but she fully counted me as one of her children and was mothering me as such.

One of the greatest lessons I learned from Mae Jay was actually our first and only fight. Yikes, right?! It was just after Sprite and I had gotten married. We were preparing to move and we had everything in order to move from one side of Samakki to the other side. As we were doing so we realized we had an extra fridge that we decided to give to our interns who had just arrived in Thailand. Well, when Mae Jay got wind of this she marched right over to our house and sat me down and once I had served her a cold glass of water (as she had taught me to do as a good Thai host) she got right into it. The way she saw it, that was her fridge. And I shouldn’t it be giving it to some strangers. She was mad, I could tell. And I was utterly confused. She explained (or maybe someone had to explain to me later) that she considered both me and my mentor who had introduced us (whose house I was now living in and moving out of) her daughters. And as her daughters, this fridge belonged to her by familial ties.

I didn’t argue. I was too scared. Mae Jay took the fridge and left me awestruck at her feistiness and embarrassed that I’d made her so angry I was also secretly honored she considered me family

Well, that fridge went on to serve Mae Jay and her family well. She used it to start a new business of selling marinated duck – one of her absolute specialties. She was only able to do it because she had this extra refrigerator. She went on to support her two grandsons to go to school with this business. It allowed her to take care of them during the day because she could marinate and sell the duck right out of her home while their dad drove a taxi 12 hours a day. This simple piece of equipment strengthened and fortified that family long into the future – much like families who went through Step Ahead’s KFT program.

This story affirms that sometimes all a family needs to build strength and stability for the children they are raising is a small investment in a practical business. One that draws from their strengths and helps them earn a steady income. And with a steady income, entire households become healthier for the children living within them.

But more than that, one of the reasons I love this story more than most is because Mae Jay was the hero in her own story. She advocated for her rights to that fridge. She knew what a difference it would make for her family. She boldly fought for what she needed and her family benefited greatly from it. She is the hero, not me.

We want to invite you to pray for more mama and grandma heroes like Mae Jay who in boldness and strength care for the children in their family like the superheroes that they are. It’s women like Mae Jay who are literally keeping families together every single day despite the poverty and hardships they face.

mae bee

We met Mae Bee when we moved to Bang Rak and started serving the 15 slum communities in that district of Bangkok. Mae Bee lived in one of these communities with her husband and two children –though she made it clear this was just a temporary situation for their family. They’d moved to the city to work and help give their children the best education they could.

Mae Bee and her husband were Christians and were working so hard to raise their children to know God. I was closest to their daughter, Gaew, who I met and connected with immediately. She was a shy, 12-year-old girl who had a lot of questions and didn’t seem to trust people easily

We soon found out that Mae Bee had sent their son to boarding school and soon little Gaew would be going there as well. At the time, I knew nothing about the downsides of sending children away to be raised in an orphanage or a boarding school type setting and so I didn’t think much of it. Now, looking back my experience means so much more.

I asked Mae Bee one time why she had decided to send her children away – it seemed to me that her and her husband were such wonderful parents and providing their children with so much love and care every day She told me that the boarding school she had chosen was far away, but it was Catholic and so not only would it give her kids a good education, Mae Bee was also hopeful that they’d teach her children the Bible. At the time, it made sense to me and so while I tried to comfort Mae Bee once Gaew left and she missed her children terribly, it seemed she was making a noble sacrifice for the future of her children.

when they are an infant (though this is the most crucial period for forming heatlhy attachment!) but also later in life I now know that what Gaew needed as she was growing up and becoming a teenager was a mother around daily to advise and teach and love her well. I’ve since learned that healthy attachment is actually even better for children’s brain development than a “good education”.

But what made me the saddest back then is that Mae Bee didn’t feel equipped to share her Christian faith with her children. When Gaew returned home from school for summer break, Mae Bee asked if I would talk to Gaew about what she learned about God while she was away. Happy to be the “good missionary”, I was honored and happily obliged. Gaew and I talked about the things she’d learned about God and the Bible – she had a lot of questions. Looking back, I regret not getting out of the way and encouraging Gaew to have these really important discussions about her own faith with her mother – the person who would be there to guide her well into adulthood and beyond.

Now, knowing what I know, Mae Bee and Gaew’s story represents the type of family situation that breaks my heart. Mae Bee didn’t feel equipped enough to give Gaew and her son what they needed at home. I’m aware that a boarding school is not the same as an orphanage. But the sentiment and the lesson I took from knowing Mae Bee leads me to believe there are a lot of other mothers out there who look at the shiny, new, well-funded Christian orphanage and think: “They can do a better job than me.”

I don’t believe that. We don’t believe that. In fact, we believe those funds might actually be better off equipping the Mae Bee’s of the world with the tools they need to raise their children at home – a scholarship to a nearby school, encouragement and coaching to disciple their own children in the home, or like Mae J, a refrigerator!

THREE MAMAS THREE STORIES THREE OPPORTUNITIES

We’d like to invite you to not only lift up Mae Ang, Mae Jay, and Mae Bee in your prayers this month but to consider what God might be saying to your heart about how you’d like to get involved in empowering mamas like them in Thailand.

Like we said, these mama’s stories are inspiring us as we consider what kind of ministry we do next here in Thailand. God has some dreams cooking in our hearts that we can’t wait to share with you.

We’ll be reaching out soon to schedule some time to meet and tell you more. Look for our emails in the coming month.

For now, we thank you for the ways you have already supported and prayed for mamas here in Thailand. Your faithfulness to their well-being, their family, and their children is important and we can’t wait to continue serving alongside you.

If you know you’d like to start a monthly gift or give a one-time donation to the work we’re doing with mamas like these, you can do so here:

praise God with us...

For all of the mamas and dadas out there who are the superheroes in their own homes and communities. We see you. We love you. We want to uplift more like you.

For the hidden figures like Mae Ang who not only provide strength and stability for their own children but offer it to their entire community in hidden, humble, practical ways. We pray for more hidden figures to be equipped and encouraged to make Thailand a better place to grow up.

For the time and space to sit with stories like these (and others we’ve collected over the years) to help guide us and prayerfully consider what is God’s next right thing for our family.

For the mentors and voices of wisdom God is currently placing in our life for such a time as this as we dream and plan for what is next.

We have been hearing here and there from those we’ve trained in the Family Strengthening Handbook and been very encouraged by how it’s helped teams improve and expand their service to families!

This month Kristen completed the 18-month long project of coaching the group of pastors from OMF Central Thailand in the Keeping Families Together Program! We walked through all of the curriculum’s 9 modules in detail to build their confidence in starting their own family strengthening program. Some of them have already started their own “Strong Families” program and are now in the process of helping families increase their income with some creative income generating projects. We are so thrilled by how this group has grown in their confidence and will now go out and serve families in their region of Thailand.

In May we also celebrated 8 years of marriage! Praise God for his grace and faithfulness and the journey that led us together all those years ago and how we’ve grown as a family.

The Queen of Sweden made a visit to Thailand and Step Ahead was able to present her with a copy of the Family Strengthening Handbook. They posted that the handbook has already been downloaded in 50 countries! We praise God for the Queen of Sweden’s foundation World Childhood and for their funding of the handbook.

pray with us...

That God would lead us forward in His grace. That we would be open to hearing His voice and following Him boldly into the next season of ministry.

Continue praying for those who have participated in any of the 11 Family Strengthening Handbook trainings in the past year – may they continue to find the courage to strengthen families even when the problems seem too big to handle.

For God to lay the groundwork necessary for us to continue equipping local leadersmore “hidden figures” - with the tools they need to strengthen families so children can be raised in their own home and their own communities. Pray that God would connect us to the people necessary to start something new.

Please continue to pray for my (Kristen’s) visa situation. We will apply for a year-long visa in June and hopefully receive it in July in time to travel to the US at the end of July.

We’ll also be applying to renew Sprite’s visa to the US as it expires in 2025. Please pray for favor from that immigration department as well.

“There is no greater warrior than a mother protecting her children.”

- N.K. Jemisin