Moss Piglet - August 2019 Issue

THE WORLD’S GREATEST ZINE

MOSS PIGLET

AUGUST 2018 $3.00

Contributing Artists Lisa A.K.

Glitter Queen

Junior Barnes

Missy Isely-Poltrock

Terry Evans

Mary Nelson

Kj Allison

Janette Hill in the Zone

Mona Dannenberg

Laura Lehman

Samira Gdisis Cover image: Mona Dannenberg Inside cover image: Janette Hill in the Zone

Artwork by Mona Dannenberg

The Lady That Loved a Swine by anonymous

There was a lady loved a swine,

“Pinned with a silver pin,

“Pig-hog, wilt thou be mine?”

“That thou mayest go out and in,”

“Honey!” quoth she; “Hoogh!” quoth he.

Honey!” quoth she;

“Hoogh!” quoth he.

“I’ll build thee a silver sty,

“Wilt thou have me now,

“And in it thou shalt lie!”

“Speak, or my heart will break,”

Honey!” quoth she;

“Hoogh!” quoth he.

Honey!” quoth she;

“Hoogh!” quoth he.

The Lady that Loved a Swine / anonymous 1

2 Linus ... Be Home/ Missy Isely-Poltrock

Terry Evans/ Nessa & her Mom 3

4 Hogwash/ Terry Evans

Lisa A.K. / I Am Fond of Pigs 5

6 Rose Marie/ Kj Allison

Junior Barnes / Sexy Pig 7

8 Behind The Scenes / Mona Dannenberg

Glitter Queen / Next 9

Missy, the Pig Whisperer

by Missy Isely-Poltrock

Once upon a time, there lived a charming young couple, Jim and Missy, who adopted a pot-bellied pig and named him Humphrey. They were told he’d be a wee piglet, but he grew bigger and bigger until he weighed 150lbs. This did not make him fat.

Pot-bellied pigs are very dense. There is a lot of pork packed into these cute porkers.

Missy and Humphrey became BFF. She could tell him anything. Jim said that Humphrey loved Missy so much, he’d follow her through hellfire. He was her bristle angel, who had his own song, Peace Train, by Cat Stevens. Remember this one. (Sing along if you like.)

Now I’ve been happy lately Th inking about the good things to come And I believe it could be Something good has begun.

10 The Pig Whisperer / Missy Isely-Poltrock

After Humphrey went to pig heaven, Big Wally came into their lives. He wasn’t so big though when a rescue shelter found him outside their door with only his Tigger blanket to keep him warm and some powered goat’s milk for his belly.

This piglet fit well into the Poltrock’s country home, showing a flair for comedy. One of Big Wally’s favorite stunts involved the neighbor’s cows. He’d stand beside the fence between the two properties and allow the bovine to gather near him. He would then jerk his head upwards, causing the cows to jump back. This fi lled him with glee.

Like Humphrey, Big Wally has his own song, My Prerogative, by Bobby Brown.

When the singer recorded this tune, he said it was his way of expressing to people to do as you want, but make sure what you do is the right thing. Big Wally agrees, He’s a goofball with a good heart.

Missy Isely-Poltrock / The Pig Whisperer 11

Missy painted the picture above of Nessa, whose nickname is Sugar Bean, or Jelly Bean Bean, or just plain Jell. When she was just a piglet, she lived at Stephnie’s house.

Here is a picture of Stephanie feeding Nessa.

12 The Pig Whisperer / Missy Isely-Poltrock

Stephanie and Nessa remain great friends. When she visits Jim and Missy, Nessa talks to her in a low, scolding pigspeak, saying, “It’s about time you got here. I’ve missed you, Now where’s my mint?”

Nessa loves mints. When you give her one, she will blow kisses your way. Her song is Here Comes the Sun, because she keeps her chin up as she makes her way along.

Missy is a pig whisperer and she has words of wisdom for anyone who’s thinking of adopting a pot-bellied pig: Pigs are misunderstood, senstive, stubborn and bonded. They do best with another pig companion. Mischevious and delightful.

Smart. And they love a good scratch and a kind word. Please consider supporting a smaller rescue, such as Home Free Farm in Canada, Pig Preserve in Tennessee, and SonnyBoy Animal Sanctuary and Lakeland Animal Shelter in Wisconsin. If you visit Lakeland, say hello to Linus. He’s a good boy.

Missy Isely-Poltrock / The Pig Whisperer 13

14 This Little Piggy / Laura Lehman

Samira Gdisis /Dot Piglet 15

The Widow Malone’s Pig

by Charles Follen Adams

The Widow Malone had a beautiful pig; No one had its equal from Cork to Killamey: And Paddy McCabe had his eye on the same; A roguish chap he, full of mischief and blarney.

Paddy McCabe is the thief.”

Soon after the guilty man came to the priest to confess and told of his theft from the Widow Malone. “Take it back,” says the priest, “without any delay.”

This beautiful pig fairly haunted his dreams; And he swore, that, unless he was sadly mistaken, he would feast off his ribs upon St. Patrick’s Day, and even the widow should not save his bacon.

“Sure I’ve ate it, your riverince,” says Paddy with a groan. “Ah,” says the priest, “at the great judgment day, when you meet the widow and pig face to face, what excuse will you give for your terrible sin? I’m thinking you’ll go to a very bad place.”

One morning the widow went out to the pen, pail in hand, with the first streak of dawn, when, lo! it was vacant; no piggy was there: The sweet little creature was gone!

“Will the widdy and pig both be there?” says Paddy. “To be sure,” says the priest, “to accuse you of sin.” “Will, thin,”replies Paddy,” I’ll say, ’Here’s your pig! By St. Patrick, I’ll niver molist him agin!’”

Straightway to the priest for assistance she went, who asked her the cause of her grief. “Och! your riverince,” says she, “ ‘tis me pig that is gone and I think

Artwork by Mona Dannenberg

16 The Widow Malone’s Pig /Charles Follen Adams

Inside cover by Janette Hill in the Zone | Back cover by Junior Barnes

That’ll do, pig. That’ll do.