Kid Magazine Issue 43

For mums who want more.

The truth

about becoming a mum of two

7 ways to save when you have a baby

OCTOBER/NOVEMBER 2018 - issue forty three

meet The mum with two sets of twins!

$$

Sam Wood shares what you need to know when training pregnant

Are high end prams worth the price tag?

PLUS...

Returning to work with confidence Ditching newborn sleep expectations The best breastfeeding products And much more...

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Editor’s letter

Image by Hipster Mum, www.hipstermum.com

I

t has been two years since I had my last baby and almost five years since I had my first but I think there are a few things that always stick with you. The sweet smell of your newborn baby and how you feel the first moment you hold them in your arms. The sheer exhaustion that you experience in the days, weeks and months after your baby is born and that magical moment when they first sleep through the night.

The baby issue we create each year is always my favourite. As difficult as that time can be when you become a new mum and have a tiny baby to look after, it is such a significant time in your life. It can be full of happiness or clouded with postnatal depression and that is why I think it is so important that Kid Magazine is a place of kind and supportive information to help new parents as they navigate that journey.

Cover image: Deanna Gaynor, dimages.com.au

In this issue you will find some fabulous Aussie businesses led by mums creating amazing products for mums and babies. You will also read about the wonderful work of the Pink Elephants Support Network and find tips and resources from our team of experts. I have also shared my personal experience of having my second child plus a mum of two sets of twins (yes TWO sets of twins) shares her very interesting story.

Until next time you can find more resources and information at kidmagazine.com.au.

Sara

Copyright Š Kid Magazine. All rights reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced without the permission of the publisher, Kid Magazine. The publisher accepts no responsibility for any errors or omissions within. Opinions expressed by authors are not necessarily those of the publisher. The information within should not be considered as personal advice.

Some links contained within may be affiliate links so we may earn a small commission if you make a purchase.

For all editorial and advertising enquiries please email sara@kidmagazine.com.au

Editor and Chief Kid sara@kidmagazine.com.au kidmagazine.com.au

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take a peek inside

30

06 18

miscarriage matters

the family book

40

08 twins x 2

22 Returning to work with confidence

the truth about becoming a mum of 2

12

7 ways to save money when you have a baby

48

24 ditching newborn sleep expectations

teething in style

14 the story of birth

28 what to know when training pregnant

when siblings meet

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Also...

Editor’s Letter Car seat safety 101 Baby spark Storing baby keepsakes Best breastfeeding products Are high end prams worth it?

When mums meet 9 baby board books A natural choice Healthy baby food recipes

3 16 20 26 32 34 40 42 43 44

shop where the cool kids shop

With the plethora of online businesses popping up all over the web, knowing where to shop can be the hardest decision you need to make. We’ve done the leg work for you and tracked down some of the hippest places to shop for you and the kids. Whether you are after funky party supplies, new maternity clothes, a fabulous photographer or toys for the kids, you will find it all plus more in the new Kid Magazine DIrectory.

Want to find out how you can join the directory? Email sara@kidmagazine.com.au for the details on our affordable packages.

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The family book What started out of Chloe Watts’ frustration at not being able to find a baby book to suit her own style and taste, has grown in to one of the most popular baby books in Australia. The Blueberry Co Monochrome Baby Book is modern, stylish and fun and that is just the start of the journey for this Australian family run business.

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The fascination with blue for boys and pink for girls is strong. Pastel balloons bounce around hospital wards while blue and pink teddy bears take up watchful pride of place at the end of bassinets. And when it comes to baby books, it is a similar sea of baby blue next to baby pink, sometimes with a “neutral” yellow or green thrown in for good measure.

The Monochrome Baby Book is a refreshing change for the contemporary parent. Illustrated by Chloe in between night feeds and day sleeps while on maternity leave with her eldest daughter, the book is a rejection of gender stereotypes and fluffy animals and instead embraces a simple yet beautiful notion of family and childhood memory keeping. One that parents have fallen in love with.

The Blueberry Co has gone from strength to strength since launching in 2015. In that time Chloe has welcomed her second daughter, relocated her family from the Southern Highlands of NSW to coastal New Zealand and now her husband also works full-time in the business.

They now split their time between New Zealand and Australia, where the book is produced.

After the success of the Monochrome Baby Book, Chloe has since launched a Monochrome Toddler Book, Mum and Me Adventures, Adventures of Dad, My Grandparents & Me and for same-sex families, a Rainbow Family Edition of The Monochrome Baby Book. The latest addition to the collection is a Christmas Book for capturing family Christmas traditions and memories.

The consistent features of the The Blueberry Co books are the signature monochrome sketches, the adaptable design allowing ample space for photos, notes and recording the milestones and memories that matter to you. They are spiral bound, not bulky and printed on facebook.com/blueberrycobaby

quality paper that will last the test of time.

As any mum who has run her own business will know, it is tough stuff.

Raising a business while you are raising babies is not easy.

Sleepless nights are paired with long days of hustling in your business, caring for the kids and not much time for anything else. Chloe’s hard work isn’t going unrecognised.

This year she won the Best Life and Business Clarity award in the National Business Brilliance Awards, following the All-in-Flynn award win from Business School for Mums in 2017. She has also recently been nominated for a Telstra Women in Business award.

One thing is clear; The Blueberry Co is continuing to rise. With glowing reviews from many happy customers, a true knowledge of how modern parents want to approach memory keeping paired with Chloe’s family centric approach, The Monochrome Baby Book, and it’s companions, are going to grace many family bookshelves for many years to come.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT BECOMING A

mum of two

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Having a baby, whether it is your first or your tenth, is a completely life changing experience. While everyone rallies around first time mums, eager to welcome their first baby into the world, for second time mums, the sheen has faded and they are left more to their own devices. But, as Sara Keli argues, second time mums are the ones who probably need the support the most.

I wasn’t completely naïve to the challenges I would face when baby number two arrived but I certainly was not prepared for just how hard I would find it. When my eldest was about six-weeks-old, already sleeping through the night, feeding like a dream and just a generally chill baby, I recall thinking to myself, “what was everyone else complaining about?”

Well, karma got me good, didn’t it! After managing the ups and downs of two years as parents to our beautiful girl, we decided it was time for another baby. We fell pregnant straight away so there wasn’t even really time to reconsider. My pregnancy was a typical second pregnancy, plagued with pelvic pain, exhaustion from running around after an active two-year-old and not much thought even given to the baby growing inside me, other than when she reminded me of her presence with her ferocious kicks as I climbed in to bed to “sleep” each night.

I went into labour 8 days early and she arrived a few short hours later. What a beautiful start! The hospital visitors were less than we had with our first daughter, but thanks to a kind message from a friend I was more than prepared for the dwindling guests. I recall sitting on the end of my hospital bed on the day we were due to go home, full of dread and panic about how I would manage two children. I was starting to get some picture of the enormity of what lay ahead and combined with the baby blues, or looking back, likely something more than that, I was terrified.

woken up by toddler ready to start it all over again.

As I finished up one task, ready to move on to the next, another five were added to my list. While I could previously rely on nap times or the ten minutes I knew my toddler would sit and watch an episode of The Wiggles in order to give me a few moments to myself, finding those moments was now almost I feared taking my eyes I was starting to get some impossible. off the baby while my toddler was present as she was equally likely picture of the enormity to try picking the baby up as to of what lay ahead and jam a large cashew nut in her tiny combined with the baby toothless mouth.

“

The early days of life with a newborn and a toddler/preschooler looked something like this: feed baby, feed toddler, play with toddler, feed baby, put baby to sleep, attempt to stop toddler blues, or looking back, likely So much of the attention and waking baby up, feed baby, play with toddler, feed baby, feed something more than that, energy of educating mums is spent toddler, shovel crusts from toddler on the first time mums. And this is I was terrified. sandwich into my mouth, feed warranted. Expecting your first baby baby, put baby to sleep, play with is equal parts joyous and alarming. toddler, bath baby and toddler, scoop baby poo out of Questions abound about what to expect during labour, the bath, feed baby, put baby to sleep, but toddler to how to breastfeed or know how much formula to give sleep, feed myself, feed baby, try to sleep, feed baby, get baby, how to get baby to sleep or what temperature the

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”

nearly that long to find my rhythm with two kids, I can say that it was all worth it. Despite the challenges and sleepless nights and tears, I wouldn’t change it for the world. To see my youngest, now the same age her sister was when we decided it was time to give her a sibling, looking up to her big sister with adoration and love, fills my heart with so much love.

And then there is the joy I feel when I see my big girl continuing to step up to the big sister plate, taking on the role of protector, carer, teacher and friend. bath water should be along with the emotional support required for new mums.

But what of the second time mums? Why does that support drop away? 90% of my mum friends who have two or more children all agree that the second brings with it such different challenges. People assume you’ve got this, and in isolation you would probably be ok with caring for a baby or caring for a toddler, you’ve done it before after all, but caring for them together is a whole other story. Going out with two is so much harder with one so you end up staying home more, adding to the feelings of isolation.

I asked a few friends how they found the experience of having their second baby and I loved what my good friend Kylie from Kidgredients shared with me. “So you think you’ve got this parenting gig all sorted, then along comes number two. And all of the newborn stuff has to happen...but at the same time as all the toddler stuff.

Nappies never need changing one at a time...they seem to do simultaneous poopage and that results in the need to make decisions like: “do I change the toddler first who might put their hands in their nappy and smear it everywhere or the newborn that might fall asleep in a poop covered jumpsuit?

“Everything that you took for granted when you had just one baby vanishes over night. Nap times never coincide and you can kiss goodbye to your social life. And those memes about turning coffee into iced coffee? They are all true.”

Looking back now, two years post my initiation into the mum-of-two club, and to be honest it has taken me

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We need to shift the “you’ll be right, you’ve done this before” conversation to one of sharing our universal experiences and learning from each other rather than the assumption that if you were ok with one that you will be ok with two. To know that it is ok to feel lost and clueless, even if it is your second baby. To still feel the arms of your village firmly around you so you can reach out to them for help. To talk more about life with two kids and not just the sibling fights as they get older or preparing meals for them as they reach different stages, but to talk about the reality of those early days of life with two little people who draw every drop of energy from within you.

There is no sugar coating the challenges that second time motherhood brings but talking more about the difficulties, the rewards and leaning in to support mums, no matter how many children they have, is part of the remedy.

END

Sara Keli is the Editor of Kid Magazine. When she isn’t writing, designing or creating, you can find her enjoying the sunshine on her back deck with her two daughters or escaping into a good book.

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Teething in Style Red cheeks, sore gums, dribbly drool – teething is about as glam as it gets!

When baby is teething, having anything to bite into (that preferably isn’t mum’s nipple) is a must. Even better if what they are biting into is not only safe, but also looks good to boot. Jellystone Designs teethers tick all the boxes and that is why mums have fallen in love with this gorgeous Aussie brand.

Blamed on many a long night or an irritable tot, teething is never a pleasant experience. And when life must go on, products that help to ease the pain and discomfort of teething, while also keeping baby entertained are essential. The range from Jellystone Designs does just that. The products are non-toxic (BPA, Phthalate, PVC, cadmium and lead free), made from silicone in designs recommended by Occupational Therapists. Based on a commitment to enhance the way babies and children learn and process through sensory exploration, under the guidance of owner and Sydney mum, Claire Behrmann, Jellystone Designs has become a leader in the silicone jewellery and teether market.

Modern mums want ease just as much as they want style. They want products that can easily be washed, that are as functional as they are good looking and that are friendly on the wallet. And this is why Jellystone Designs has become such a fan favourite. The silicone products can be thrown in the dishwasher and are durable enough to stand up to almost anything an angry baby can throw at them. The silicone necklaces are an easy wear jewellery piece for mums and the prices on the entire range make them an affordable gift.

Whether you are a fan of brights or prefer pastels, you are sure to find something you love in the range. We can’t help but love...

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ADVERTORIAL

Cloud Teether Who wouldn’t love this gorgeous little teether that doubles as a rattle. Made from silicone, beech wood and a ball rattle it will certainly keep bubs entertained and happy!

Cuddle Soother The benefit of a teether attached to a super soft fabric, design for comfort and tactile play. The teether can be removed to make washing easier or to even attach your own dummy or teether.

Cuddle Bunny OMG! This is the softest little breathable bamboo bunny destined to become lifelong besties with so many babies.

The ears double as a tie for a dummy (genius) or even to attach a teether.

Moon Teether When you just want to keep it simple this is it. The rings are made from silicone and beech mood in a unique d esign that allows baby to safely explore and provide relief to sore gums.

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What to know when training pregnant Something so many women worry about is whether they can continue exercising while pregnant. It is natural during pregnancy to be more alert and aware of what we are doing to our bodies, exercise included. But Sam Wood is here to allay your fears around the truth about getting your body moving when you have a baby on the way!

I am a big advocate for women keeping active throughout their pregnancy. There will always be exceptions to this rule but assuming you have the allclear from your doctor- get moving! There are a number of benefits that come from exercising during pregnancy but one that Snez found incredibly motivating is how much it can help your body recover once your baby is born. During all stages of your pregnancy it’s not only safe but incredibly beneficial to exercise three to four times a week for around 20-30 minutes. There are of course things to be mindful of that will ensure that you and your baby are safe. I sat down with our 28 pregnancy expert, Chloe Lorback, to chat through exactly what you need to be mindful of when exercising during pregnancy.

Don’t overexert This might seem obvious, but pregnancy is not the time to be aiming for PB’s or sending your heart rate through kidmagazine.com.au 14

the roof. You need to keep your heart rate in a safe zone and your doctor will be able to help you determine what this looks like for you. Make sure that you are exercising at a conversational pace, so that if someone was talking to you you’d be able to have a chat. If you are finding yourself short of breath for longer than a minute or two then you need to slow down, take a break and reduce the intensity.

Watch your temperature Your core temperature is already higher than normal throughout pregnancy, which means you need to ensure you are taking the appropriate steps to prevent overheating. Make sure you do your workout in a wellventilated, cool environment and don’t forget to keep hydrated.

Modify your workouts In the early stages of your pregnancy, it’s typically ok to do the same kinds of workouts you were doing before you fell pregnant (except for contact sports or workouts where there is a high risk of falling like skiing). As you progress into the 2nd and 3rd trimester you’ll need to avoid high-impact exercises that involve jumping and jerking movements (bye, burpees!). During this time you should also avoid heavy weights that put too much pressure on your pelvis. This is a great opportunity to mix up your workouts with some low-impact options like swimming, walking and pregnancy yoga and pilates.

These will keep you active and are gentle on your body- win, win!

Work with a professional Pregnancy is a time where it’s more important than ever to make sure you are working with a professional or team of professionals that you trust. This might be your personal trainer, through a safe and reputable online program or with a pregnancy physio or pilates teacher. No matter who it is, make sure they understand you and your individual needs and are experienced with pregnancyrelated training.

these women feel safe, comfortable and well supported with their training and nutrition during their pregnancy.

This is why I work with a team of experts including pregnancy physios and nutritionists that expecting mums can access any time. This constant support and reassurance is something I believe to be incredibly important as this is most definitely a time in their life where they will have lots of questions (and rightly so!).

END

Know what to look out for There are some warning signs that you need to be aware of when exercising pregnant. Light-headedness, dizziness and nausea are not symptoms that you should ignore as they can indicate low blood sugar levels, low blood pressure or an overheating body. If you experience any or all of these symptoms during your training session you need to stop, take a break and make sure that you’re well hydrated and well nourished. It’s also important to remember that spending too much time on your back can also trigger these symptoms as the pressure from the weight of your growing belly can place pressure on your major arteries. This is when sitting, standing and side-lying positions may be better for you as you get further into your pregnancy.

Sam Wood’s extremely successful 28 by Sam Wood program has achieved incredible results for the 120, 000+ people who have completed it in just over 2 years. Collectively, his clients have lost over 2 million kilos in that time that he knows of in a very sustainable way. In addition to his award-winning site www.28bysamwood.com Sam has recently launched the program as an App with around $1million being spent on it to make it an incredible world-class experience. The app includes 28 minute workouts the cover HIIT, yoga, Pilates, Pregnancy and post natal as well as nutrition tips, recipes and mindset/ meditations.

I’m incredibly lucky that through my 28 by Sam Wood Pregnancy Program I’ve had the pleasure of working with thousands of mums during one of the most special times in their lives. I know how incredibly important it is that

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Car seat safety 101 Child restraints are safer than ever but the information about which ones to use and how to use them can be so overwhelming. From the laws around what type of child car seat you need to knowing if you have installed them correctly, Hire for Baby is here to help!

About 6 weeks before my daughter turned 3 I walked into a baby shop to buy her a new car seat. We were expecting baby number two any day so needed somewhere for the new baby to sit. Up until that point she had been sitting in a rear-facing restraint. She still fit so I knew that is where she was safest. As an over-cautious mama I was still toying with the idea of purchasing a seat where she could rear face for a little bit longer, perhaps another year until she turned 4.

I explained this to the shop assistant who looked at me like I had three heads. “You want a rear-facing seat for HER?” she asked incredulously. Not quite the reaction I was expecting, especially from a sales assistant in a baby shop. The reality is that the laws in Australia surrounding child restraints are quite different to what is happening in practice.

The laws are very simple: 0-6 months rear facing, 6 months to 4 years, rear or forward facing, and 4-7 years forward facing child restraint, or booster (your child must meet the height requirements to transition to the next stage of child restraint).

In practice many parents are keeping their children rear facing as long as possible, and for older children keeping them in a harnessed child restraint for as long as possible.

Manufacturers are now making more extended rear facing models, as well as restraints for taller children.

Adding to this complexity around car seats – the difference between what the law says and what is best practice – is the sheer choice of child restraints available and finding the right one to suit your child, your family and also your car. If you need to fit three car seats across the back seat of a car you will be far more limited for choice than you will be if you are expecting your first baby and driving a large SUV. When it comes to fitting your restraints correctly you also want peace of mind that your most precious cargo is secured as safely as they can be. If you have any doubt about the safety of your car seats, Hire for Baby has designed 10 quick questions so you can tell for sure.

They also created these 10 quick child restraint checks, which will give you peace of mind that your car seats are installed correctly or alert you to any possible dangers.

Hire for Baby isn’t just for hiring baby equipment. At each of their 75 locations around Australia you can book in to have your car seat fitted or checked by a professional.

They also offer parent workshops to give you the confidence you need to use and maintain your car restraints going forward.

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Twin

2

Her chances of having a second set of identical twins were somewhere around 1 in 70,000 but for Sydney mum Sophia Brown this is exactly what happened.

With no family history of twins and conceiving naturally both times, Sophia and her husband Paule welcomed twin boys, Ethan and Harley, now aged four followed by twin girls Camilla and Madison, who have recently celebrated their first birthday. The popular blogger behind Twins and a Blog, Sophia shares her experience of life with twins x 2.

When you found out you were expecting twins for the first time, how did you feel?

At my 6 week dating scan it showed one heartbeat and a shadow behind the sac, which the report said was a blood clot or a failed twin pregnancy. I was relieved and laughed at it being such a close call because...’OMG imagine if we had twins!’ It was at my 10 week appointment with my Obstetrician that I found out we were expecting twins. He told us to look at the screen and pointed out there was two heartbeats. As it was the first time I had been pregnant I had no idea what to look for or expect and automatically thought it was an abnormality in the baby until he pointed out there was in fact two babies in there! I felt a range of emotions from being shocked, terrified, excited and nervous. kidmagazine.com.au 18

When your boys arrived, how did you handle being a first time mum with two babies?

I was terrified of being alone with them by myself for long periods. When my husband had to go back to work after a few weeks off, I asked my mum to be with me. I felt that I always needed a one baby to one adult ratio.

When you found out you were expecting twins for the second time, did that come as a massive shock?

The 2nd time round was a huge shock as I had prepared myself for the experience of being pregnant and having one baby! I thought we had experienced the crazy chance of having twins once, there was no way we could have them again!

What was life like with two newborns and two toddlers when your girls were born?

Life was hectic with two newborns and two toddlers but because we dived into the deep end with newborn twins before as first time parents, it was much easier the second time around as we already had an established tried and tested routine. It was hard to divide our attention between two newborns that fed every 2-3 hours but also between two toddlers so they would not feel replaced or left out with new siblings. The positive of having twins is that they were never an ‘only child’ and are used to sharing our attention, so it was an easy transition. We tried to get out of the house regularly to have a break from the monotony of home life.

What were your biggest fears about having twins?

My biggest fear was my twin pregnancies. I was terrified that something would go wrong during my pregnancies since twin pregnancies are considered high risk. I was especially worried when I was pregnant with the girls as I suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum and the type of twin pregnancy that I had with them was MonochorionicDiamniotic “MoDi” twins (2 sacs, 1 placenta) which is a higher risk twin pregnancy than with the boys who were Dichorionic/Diamniotic ‘Didi’ twins (2 sacs, 2 placentas).

I had really uncomfortable pregnancies where I was in bed a lot, so I had all the time in the world to Google and worry about all the ‘what ifs’. Once the babies were born there’s no time to worry about anything as life is just go, go, go!

How do you and your husband balance it all together?

Generally, when it comes to meals, bath time and bedtime, I’m in charge of the girls and my husband is in charge of the boys. I am also back at work part time. We have very supportive workplaces so on the days I am at work, my husband has those days off his roster (shift work) so we can look after the kids between us.

What do you love most about having a big family?

And what is the biggest challenge?

I only ever wanted two kids, but after having four kids (from two pregnancies) I can see the appeal a big family has! I love the noise, chaos, laughs, cuddles and company.

I have learnt to be a multi-tasking ninja mum, but it all goes down the drain when someone (or everyone) gets sick - then I can really feel the weight of having four kids!

My biggest challenge is the laundry - I can never keep up!!

If there was one thing you could tell a mum who is expecting twins, what would that be?

Lower your expectations with cooking, cleaning and your appearance. There is a light at the end of the tunnel once you get through the newborn blur, and they are teeny tiny babies for such a short time! I was so hard on myself when I had the boys I feel like I completely missed and resented the newborn stage. I learnt my lesson and enjoyed and cherished every moment when the girls were newborns!

END

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BABY SPARK

Unless you have fallen pregnant after an unplanned night of wild passion, it is likely that the act of making a baby is the least sexy sex you have ever had. You approach it with the determination of a seagull flying towards hot chips on the beach, with a sole purpose in mind – making a baby. Sara Keli reveals four ways to keep the spark alive in your baby making romps!

Shift your focus from the outcome When you are attached to the outcome of something, anything, whether it is trying to conceive a baby or getting a new job, it takes your focus away from the process, or anything else that is happening around you.

By focusing on the outcome, you aren’t really in the moment. Sex is just a step in the process to achieving the outcome and that is terribly unsexy. And if it takes you a few months or even more to conceive, you can start to resent sex. While it is easier said than done to shift your focus away from the outcome, the reality is that if you are relaxed and enjoying the moment, it increases your chances of falling pregnant anyway.

Don’t make your sex life just about falling pregnant If you are only having sex when you feel that familiar ovulation pain or you get that notification from your ovulation app to tell you that now is the time, that is a sure fire way to take the enjoyment and fun out of sex.

Have sex in between your fertile times. Take it out of the bedroom into the shower, the couch or wherever the mood takes you. It’s not just about falling pregnant but about the connection between you as a couple and those intimate moments you share together.

to tango, and certainly two to make a baby! But often women can feel like they are bearing the burden of falling pregnant alone. Talk to your partner about how you are feeling – share the stresses and the joys together and the weight will lift, allowing more space for you to enjoy the moment and keep the spark alive.

Remember that a baby changes everything There is nothing like leaking breasts and hair that hasn’t been brushed in a week to make you feel like the unsexiest version of yourself. When the baby arrives you will be sleep deprived, busier than you have ever been in your life and so much more tired than you ever expected.

Opportunities for sex are not as available as they one were so enjoy the time before you do have a baby. Once you fall pregnant it really is a short nine months before they arrive and change your world forever.

END

Talk about how you are feeling Once things are all out in the open it is easier to make changes for the better. Trying to conceive can be a stressful time but it isn’t something that either person in the relationship should be taking on alone. It takes two

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Sara Keli is the Editor of Kid Magazine. When she isn’t writing, designing or creating, you can find her enjoying the sunshine on her back deck with her two daughters or escaping into a good book.

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WAYS TO SAVE MONEY WHEN YOU HAVE A BABY

Having a baby is one of the most fulfilling experiences in life. It’s also one of the most expensive experiences you’ll ever encounter. A new baby can put a strain on the household budget. Not only are your expenses going to increase, but your income will likely decrease. A scary thought, right? But the arrival of a new baby doesn’t mean you must abandon your savings plan and money goals. Jo Violeta shares 7 great ways to save money when you’re preparing for your newborn:

I wish I’d known what was ‘really necessary’ and what wasn’t before my first bub. I bought everything new and didn’t need half of it! For my second child however, I was far savvier.

I scoured eBay during my pregnancy and found lots of brand-name bargains, many still with the tags on.

Second-hand is a smart strategy for special occasion clothes. You can pick up a princess dress or a tiny suit for a fraction of its retail cost and chances are its previous owner only wore it once or twice.

If buying second-hand cots, prams or car seats, you’ll need to check that the items comply with current safety standards. Even if a second-hand item is in good condition, it may be less safe than a newer model. Keep in mind that second-hand goods bought from a private seller usually aren’t covered by consumer guarantees.

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Buy second-hand

Shop around for better deals on household expenses

Towards the end of both of my pregnancies, I was in full-on nesting mode. I spring-cleaned the entire house.

Carl and I also spring-cleaned our finances. We went through every ongoing expense to see if we could save by negotiating a better deal. We contacted our utility and insurance providers. Before I started maternity leave, we refinanced our home-loan, reducing our interest rate and monthly repayments. By dedicating an afternoon to ringing around, we literally saved hundreds of dollars a month.

Australian Breastfeeding Association If you’re breastfeeding, consider joining the Australian Breastfeeding Association (ABA). You’ll have access to a huge variety of discounts including breastfeeding related products. The ABA membership also offers half-price hire fees for breast pumps and access to free information and support.

Test before buying up big

If you’re going to use bottles to feed your baby (whether it be formula or expressed breast milk) only buy one or two bottles initially. You need to be sure that bubs will drink out of that bottle design and may need to test a few different brands until you find the right one. A friend of mine bought 10 bottles of a certain brand because everyone raved about them, but unfortunately her son wouldn’t drink from them. It took a few attempts before she found a brand he liked.

Wait to purchase

If you’re going to have a baby shower, or have particularly clucky and generous friends and family, wait to see what presents you receive before buying stuff for your baby.

That way you’ll save doubling up.

Do you have any other useful tips for saving money in the lead up to, and during the first year of, having a new baby? Please feel free to join our Facebook group and share your tips with other parents. There are plenty of great money-saving conversations going on in there.

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Don’t buy too many baby clothes in advance

Babies grow super-fast. It can be hard to coordinate what size they’ll need for which season. Newborns can have sudden growth spurts at any time of the year. For example: when I was pregnant with our eldest Eva, I bought her a beautiful (and very expensive) coat. But sadly, by the time winter came, she had outgrown it.

Reconsider baby shoes

We have a super cute collection of never worn sneakers for our youngest. They were never worn because he didn’t really need shoes and even when we did try to put them on him they just fell straight off. Baby shoes look gorgeous, but before you whip out your credit card, consider whether you really need them. facebook.com/violetafinance

Jo and Carl Violeta are self-confessed numbers nerds, parents of an energetic toddler and a super switchedon teenager, and co-founders of the award-winning business, Violeta Finance. They are a husband and wife team who are passionate about empowering their community with financial education, love the odd glass of wine, and get a kick out of helping families achieve their homeownership and financial dreams.

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What stemmed from a desire to learn everything she could to prepare for the birth of her second baby has now turned into a hugely popular podcast with more than 500,000 downloads. The Australian Birth Stories podcast has grown phenomenally in the 18 months since launching and Sophie Walker continues to grow it from strength to strength.

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Image: DepsitPhotos.com/ mary_smn

The story of birth

During her second pregnancy, binged on birth stories in an effort much as she could about birth and avoid the traumatic experience she first son, Niko. But, as she discovered, the birth stories available were with unfamiliar hospitals and a vastly healthcare system to what we have Australia.

Sophie to learn as hopefully had with her most of American, different here in

So in May 2017 Sophie recorded the of the Australian Birth Stories build a library of birth stories for mums. The first episode featured her story of her second son Louis. In that followed as she tried to grow she interviewed her sister and then girlfriends. Today the waiting list of want to share their birth stories on sits at over 400 with more than 80 already recorded.

first episode Podcast to Australian own birth the weeks the episodes some close women who the podcast birth stories

Expecting her third child, due in Sophie is mum to two boys aged 3 records the podcast herself, does all and webpages. It is the familiar story around nap times, kinder drop offs day each week when the kids spend their grandmother. The growth of has been organic through word of the loyal Instagram following she has a credit to the concept and Sophie’s and dedication.

March 2019, and 5. She the editing of working and the one the day with the podcast mouth and built which is hard work

The podcast doesn’t shy away from sharing the negative birth stories as well as the positive. As Sophie explains, “The idea of the podcast is that when you go into birth you have listened to a variety of stories so won’t be completely shocked at needing an epidural or caesarean because you’ve kind of worked through that as a possibility already after listening to so many stories.”

“People are always surprised at how it unfolds. You can do all the Calmbirth or Hypnobirth in the world and then the baby has its own ideas. You can get lucky but there are so many unknowns.”

A huge portion of the podcast listeners are first time mums, terrified of the idea of childbirth who end up walking into it feeling empowered after listening to the stories of so many other women. As Sophie says, “No one else’s story has to be your story. You are going to have

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Image: Jess Warrall Photography

your own unique story. While people can be nervous to listen, listening to other people’s stories can be the best way to prepare.”

It is clear that people love to share their birth stories and that there is a captive audience keen to devour every detail of the miracle of birth. Sophie has created a safe space for birth storytelling that will be a powerful resource for this generation of mothers and beyond. The letters she receives every day from mothers who have drawn on stories they listened to on the podcast while they were in labour themselves is evidence enough of that.

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Memory Keeping Kids come with a lot of, well, stuff. Some things are easy to ditch while others not so much and once they accumulate over time, it can be more than a little overwhelming and emotional to decide what you need to keep. Organising expert Amanda Lecaude shares her tips for keeping and storing those precious childhood memories.

Formal records and documents These are the type of documents that are important, need to be kept and need to be easily accessible. E.g. Maternal Child Health books (Blue Book), birth certificates and any other health or important documents relating to the birth, growth or development of your child.

My advice when it comes to keeping these records is to have them in one or two locations where you can easily put your hand on them when you need them. In my case, I have always kept my children’s Maternal Child Heath books on the top shelf of their bookshelves. My boys are now 13 and 16 and this is still where they are located even today. Every time I have to check when they were last immunised for the upcoming school camp it’s been easy as I just go straight there and find the information I need.

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In terms of the other important records that I have for each child they can be found in my filing cabinet in our office space. I have a health file for each child and birth certificates can be found in our legal file. At the end of the day it is not so much about which folder or file you store them in but about where you keep them, ensuring you put them there and how you will remember to know where they are.

The moment you find yourself putting bits here and there is when you can find yourself searching and looking for records when you need them and wasting precious time.

This can create both stress and unnecessary pressure when you are time poor and need to put your hands on something quickly.

Keepsakes and mementos

These types of items are probably more emotional and are attached to a special memory. Perhaps they are name tags from the hospital birth, cards or gifts you were given in the early days right though to the piles of artwork that seem to flood home from school.

While it is best to keep these mementos together in one location, unfortunately this isn’t my experience with many of my clients.

When we find a piece of memorabilia that relates to their child they are glad they kept it but had no idea where it was. Often items are spread across many locations and poorly cared for or damaged. Once you have decided on a location to store these items, whether it is the top of the wardrobe, in the garage or the linen closet, plastic tubs offer protection to keep items in good condition and are easy to locate when you have something new to add.

The decision on what to keep can be even harder to make. Naturally this is up to you but realistically, with storage a premium in most homes these days, you must note that it can be a struggle physically to keep everything. Some of my clients have every piece of artwork their child ever made whilst others have kept what they perceive to be more milestone related or pieces with a special meaning. Some people like to keep certain keepsakes and take photos of others – this can be particularly useful when it comes to artwork.

Another idea relating to artwork that some of my clients do is to produce a book of their child’s artwork to give to them one day rather than hold on to all the items.

These days there are many different ways of storing or keeping artwork and the Internet is a great source for finding these.

Photographs I could write a whole article on photographs but the key message I want to make once again is to keep your photos in one location. These days we don’t have as many printed photos lying around but digital photos can bring their own storage issues. I still usually see that many of my clients have no system or structure as to how & where they file and keep these online let alone have secure back ups – this is crucial crucial crucial! We never think it will happen to us but unfortunately it can & does so please ensure you protect any precious memories by finding a backup solution that works best for you.

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Whilst it might take a bit of time and thought in the early days to determine where you will keep your records, keepsakes and mementos it will be worth it as soon as you get a chance. It will most likely save you time and peace of mind in the long run!

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Amanda Lecaude is an organising expert and academic coach who loves being able to help people – her clients – get organised. She sees the difference it makes in their everyday lives, particularly families, just to have a way to create some TIME, SPACE and BALANCE! She also very passionate about equipping school students with organising skills for life to maximise greater results primarily in secondary school and limit the overwhelm and frustration for both them and their parents.

Get in touch 0409 967 166 amanda@organisingyou.com.au

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When siblings meet Unlike the first time around, when you are pregnant with your second child, you have the added complexity of another little person to consider.

Not only are you infinitely more exhausted from running around after them all day while at the same time growing another person, there is the whole question of how to prepare #1 for the arrival of #2. Sara Keli shares five ways to be on the front foot for the arrival of a new sibling. kidmagazine.com.au 28 Image:Â DepositPhotos.com/4masik

Involve them The trick is to make #1 feel part of the journey rather than a reluctant bystander. Take them to appointments; ask for their help with decorating the nursery; talk to them about baby names and what it will be like when their new sibling arrives; let them feel the baby kicking or even get them to help you announce your pregnancy. Reading them books such as New Adventures: My New Sibling can also introduce them to what life will be like post baby.

Getting them involved during your pregnancy can also pay off when baby arrives and you need a helper to fetch nappies or pass you the remote while you are mid-feed.

Buy them a gift from the baby Having a new baby land in your home can be quite the shock for anyone but particularly the first child who will have their whole world disrupted without any choice in the matter. As much as you have talked about it in the months leading up, that arrival can smack them in the face, particularly when they feel isolated while mum and dad are at the hospital caring for the new baby. Start to develop the bond between siblings by purchasing a gift from the new baby. An Ergobaby doll carrier is a brilliant gift idea so your child can care for their “baby” while you care for yours or even a sibling tee from Bright Star Kids.

It is also a nice touch for #1 to choose a gift for their new brother or sister.

Preparing for the birth

or making any other massive changes in the couple of months before or after baby arrives – keep things familiar and consistent to avoid too much disruption.

Plan for life with two The trick to life with a toddler and a newborn is to be super organised. The best laid plans often go awry but that is actually when some time spent organising prebaby will come in handy. For a new mum of two, the last thing you want is to almost have the baby asleep when your older child bounds noisily into the room because they are bored and want your attention s you need activities for your older child to do while you are spending time on newborn care. Tiger Tribe activity sets are perfect for this as they can also be thrown into your bag for while you are out and about. Likewise a Very Busy Bag can be carted around or saved for those times at home when you really need the quiet!

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Sara Keli is the Editor of Kid Magazine. When she isn’t writing, designing or creating, you can find her enjoying the sunshine on her back deck with her two daughters or escaping into a good book.

So while you are preparing for the birth in a whole other way, you need to prepare your child for time away from you. Make plans for who will look after your child when you go to the hospital and when they will come to visit you. When they do come to visit you in hospital, make a big deal about their arrival and give them lots of attention. Leave the baby in the nursery while you take a walk together or involve them in the first bath. Coming home from the hospital as a family is also really important so they feel part of the process.

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Keep things as routine as possible We all know that when you have a new baby, a routine can feel like the farthest thing from reality. But it is likely that your toddler is already in a routine and to help them cope with the family change, sticking to this routine as much as possible is key. Of course things will change but, where you can, sticking to routine will make a massive difference. It is also not advisable to start toilet training facebook.com/kidmagazine

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1 in 4 of the women reading this will have suffered, or in the future suffer a miscarriage. For women over the age of 35 this jumps to 1 in 3. I hazard a guess that every woman reading this article will know a friend or family member who has miscarried a baby. Given the devastating effects pregnancy loss can have, The Pink Elephants Support Network is out to change the way women are supported through miscarriage.

When an elephant in the wild loses a baby, the other elephants place their trunks on her and form a circle of support. But for human women, it is a very different story.

Gabbi Armstrong and Samantha Payne met in a Facebook group chat about the lack of support for women experiencing infertility issues and pregnancy loss. Both women know the pain and loneliness of miscarriage and so, in 2016 The Pink Elephants Support Network was born, named so as a nod to our elephant mums and their circle of support.

Relying not just on their own experiences, the Pink Elephants set out to speak to other women who have struggled on the journey of pregnancy loss. 1600 women responded to the call and shared their story, the results of which have been released this month to coincide with International Pregnancy Loss Remembrance Day, October 15. And honestly, the statistics paint a miserable picture.

We know that 1 in 4 women will suffer a miscarriage in their lifetime. 282 women in Australia everyday will report pregnancy loss before 20 weeks gestation. This is a sad enough story on it’s own. But, as the research from the Pink Elephants revealed, Almost 70 per cent of women who suffered a miscarriage said they received no support at all. That is almost 200 women every single day who are going through what can only be one of the hardest moments of their life, feeling like they are completely alone and unsupported in that experience.

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Co-founder Samantha Payne, knows we can do better.

“Miscarriage is an individual journey, but it’s not one that should be walked alone. Everyone experiencing miscarriage has the right to receive support, empathy and understanding to assist and guide them through their own healing process. We support women as they grieve, nurture them as they heal and empower them as they move beyond,” she said.

This support comes in the form of free online resources for women, their partners, family and friends that have

been downloaded more than 4,000 times since launch, and through care packs for women in more than 30 NSW Hospitals. And earlier this year they launched a national first, a program offering women a course of six free sessions of personalised peer support with another woman who has walked a similar journey, providing a safe space to share feelings and emotions.

Designed by a social worker and bereavement counsellor, Terry Diamond, the program covers miscarriage basics, grief theory, counselling skills, boundaries and marking a loss. “Having trained peer supporters who can understand and validate the emotions that accompany the loss of a much wanted pregnancy is an invaluable resource,” said Ms Diamond.

loss in support of #miscarriagematters. Paralympian and Cosmopolitan Woman of the Year, Jessica Smith is one of these women. She said, ‘Taking the time to acknowledge and remember my baby who was too precious for this earth, is something I try to do often. I had no idea what the statistics were around pregnancy loss, I felt lost and alone. I share my story in the hope that it will leave a sense of peace among others who also know this tremendous pain”.

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Throughout the month of October, the Pink Elephants are encouraging women to share their experience pregnancy

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When you are breastfeeding, having the right products to support you can make all the difference. Here are 10 of the best!

1 Body Silk Seamless Nursing Bra, $64.95 and Clip and Pump™ Hands-Free Nursing Bra Accessory, $44.95, thestorknest.com.au/pages/bravado-launch 2 Milkbar Nursing Pillow in blue, $69.95, kidslifestyle.com.au/category/ourbrands/milk-bar 3 Spectra S2+ Hospital Grade Double Electric Breast Pump, $299, spectra-baby.com.au 4 BodyICE Woman Breast Pads is $44.95, bodyice.com 5 Real Active Big Bottle – Classic Black, $26.95, realactive.com.au 6 Nursing Nutrition Chocolate Bliss Balls, $24.95, pureblissco.com.au 7 Nipple balm, $12.95, www.gaiaskinnaturals.com 8 ProsperiTea Breastfeeding Tea, $26.95 and BambiniTea Bubs & Kids Blend, $26.95, maternitea.com 9 Breastfeeding singlet, $69.50, www.modibodi.com 10 Emily Nursing Racer Top Pink, $99, www.mammojo.com kidmagazine.com.au 32

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INTRODUCING 2 NEW EBOOKS FROM ORGANISING STUDENTS

WHAT STUDENTS NEED TO KNOW

Taking the leap to Secondary School

The Leap to Secondary School

HOW TO SUPPORT YOUR CHILD

By Amanda Lecaude

By Amanda Lecaude

www.organisingstudents.com.au

www.organisingstudents.com.au

FOR STUDENTS

FOR PARENTS

Written for students and parents, these comprehensive eBooks provide a greater understanding of what to expect in taking the leap to secondary school.

Full of tips and strategies to increase the chances of a smooth and successful transition including: • the key differences between primary and secondary school; • reassurance about thoughts & feelings - they are not alone; • other key tips including tips from their peers;

• an understanding of the fundamental skills students need to develop to become more independent and responsible; and • guiding parents on how to support their child.

Available to purchase from www.organisingstudents.com.au

“Wow. This is FANTASTIC! This is a comprehensive guide that answers all the concerns Year 6 students usually have. It will be the saving grace for many families” EDUCATOR AND RETIRED PRIMARY SCHOOL PRINCIPAL

ARE HIGH END PRAMS

WORTH THE PRICE TAG? When you can spend anywhere from two hundred dollars, to over two grand on a new pram, I can understand why some parents are left wondering if it’s really worth paying more. Rachel Stewart explores whether high end prams a frivolous and unnecessary expense, or a worthwhile investment.

DO YOU REALLY GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR WITH PRAMS?

My short answer is - generally, yes. While there might be some exceptions, I think you do get a better pram when you spend more money.

Generally more expensive prams are better designed, well made and often more innovative or interesting. They’ll have more features, better materials and textiles, and ideally a little easier to use and push.

IS IT ALL ABOUT THE LABEL?

I feel like sometimes there is a negative attitude towards parents choosing a pram because of it’s brand name. Some brands are easily recognisable and have built themselves a strong fan base. And I don’t actually see a problem with that!

If you can afford it, and the pram itself meets your needs, then why not choose a pram because you like the brand? There’s really nothing wrong with that. It’s like buying a designer handbag. As long as it’s also practical. Especially given how much time over many years you’ll probably be pushing it around, why not choose a pram just because you like it?

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Image: DepositPhotos.com/Seamartini

HIGH PRICE = HIGH EXPECTATIONS DO YOU NEED TO SPEND As I said there are exceptions to the rule that the more MORE ON A PRAM? you spend the better the pram. And you absolutely should be fussier the more you spend. So an awkward fold, a smaller seat or low weight limit might be acceptable with an entry level pram, it’s going to be less forgivable the more you spend on the pram.

And even though I’m totally down with buying a pram because you like the brand, you shouldn’t overlook design flaws just because the pram is popular.

SOME FACTORS TO CONSIDER:

•H ow easy are the mechanisms to operate? Test out things like the fold, recline, brakes and buckles to make sure they’re easy for you to operate.

• What features does it offer? Parent facing seat, adjustable handlebar or footrest, storage options like the basket and pockets, hood and wheel size. Make sure it’s meeting all your needs.

• Suitability from birth? Even some high end prams aren’t ready to go from birth, because they don’t offer a fully flat seat for your newborn. This is something to be aware of and factor into the overall value for money.

• What are the height and weight limit? If you’re spending top dollar you want to be sure that you’re going to get a lot of years out of the pram.

• Check the reviews! You should do this with any major purchase, especially when you’re spending the extra money. The pram might look and feel good in the baby store, but how does it fare over time? Online product reviews from other parents are incredibly valuable when working out if a pram is truly worth the price tag. Tell Me Baby is a great go-to for reviews from real mums!

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Absolutely not. I’ve paid more than a thousand dollars for a pram, but I’ve also bought a pram for $36 second hand on ebay. And guess which one is still in my garage? The cheap second hand one! So you don’t have to pay top dollar for a great pram, especially if you know what you’re looking for.

If you’re not planning to use your pram a lot; you generally don’t walk a lot, you’re planning to babywear, or only going to be using a pram around the shops so your pram will be in the boot most of the time anyway, then it might not be worth investing a lot of money into a pram.

But if you can afford to, and you want to, and you see yourself getting value out of a top end pram - then go for it! Just be discerning to ensure that you truly do get what you pay for.

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Rachel is a Melbourne base mum of two. She has a background in early childhood education, but always wanted to be a writer. She enjoys knitting, drinking coffee (sometimes wine), spending too much time on Facebook and is a little obsessed with prams. She also writes for her own website Parenting Central.

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Returning to work with confidence after parental leave You’ve invested in the ultimate pram and decorated an Insta-worthy nursery, but there’s much more to consider when preparing for a baby. You’ll receive a truckload of advice—some valid, some less so—and it will likely centre around labour and the first months of parenthood. While ultimately you can’t control what sort of birth you’ll have (or what sort of baby!), one thing you can take charge of is your parental leave journey. Jodi Geddes and Kate Pollard share how.

Having a baby is a huge life transition however we don’t often take the time to think about the impact on our career, how we will navigate flexible working or juggle work and family life when we return. We’re so focussed on our baby’s arrival that when it comes to work we rarely think beyond childcare waitlists and having a job to return to. Organisations don’t always have robust policies in place to support new parents and, even so, roles, staff and organisations often change while you are away. All of these things can lead to many parents finding their confidence takes a hit when returning to work.

By thinking about your career and putting a plan in place with your manager, it will help you prepare and maintain your confidence throughout your parental leave.

After speaking with many parents, we know that these simple steps will set you up for a successful return both personally and professionally. And it could be the best career move you make!

So, how do you set yourself up for a successful return to work before even starting parental leave? kidmagazine.com.au 36

Manage expectations

Start by initiating an open and honest conversation with your manager about your aspirations, potential opportunities, and ways to keep in touch while you’re on leave. It’s a common misconception among expectant parents that pregnancy isn’t the time to be open about your needs and ambitions. Undefined expectations can lead to misunderstandings or feeling overlooked. Now’s a great time to initiate career conversations and develop strategies to manage the transition.

Request a performance review

A performance review before you start your leave not only helps manage expectations, but serves as a reminder to your employer that personal development and career progression are as important to you now as they were pre-pregnancy. Formal reviews present the opportunity to discuss pay reviews, bonus potential and opportunities for promotion while you’re on leave.

Draw up a parental leave plan

This is a plan for you and about you! Consider it a simple document for your manager (and others) to refer to in your absence. It should lay out the time before, during and after parental leave from a career perspective, and include: • personal details • leave details: key dates • requested leave period • handover plan: projects; deliverables; key items your manager/team should know • Keeping in Touch plan: how you’d like to be kept updated by your manager and how often; other key contacts and why each is important; how you wish to stay connected; how you’ll communicate; list of specific team meetings, training and events you’d like to be included in whilst on leave; how you’ll use your Keeping in Touch days (see below) Use the Circle In Parental Leave Plan and Keeping in Touch templates to guide you.

Resources

Stay connected

So, you’ve prepared your parental leave plan, your manager is on board and you’re ready to welcome your baby into the world. After the teary goodbyes and activating your out of office, remember to stay connected while on leave by making use of your Keeping in Touch days.

Images: Leah Ladson

Keeping in Touch days are a fantastic resource and allow you to work up to ten days during your leave period without losing any unpaid parental leave or governmentfunded parental leave entitlements. There are many ways you can use your Keeping in Touch days and they provide an opportunity to: • become familiar with new or updated processes • be involved in forward planning discussions or meetings important to your role • complete training or update skills before returning • keep up-to-date with your industry and organisation / maintain networks by attending conferences and events • transition back to work by spending time in the office catching up with your manager and team So, as soon as you start your pregnancy vitamins, also start working on your plan. Set clear expectations from the very beginning, be organised and stay connected.

This will facilitate a smooth parental leave transition, set you up in the best possible way for a stress-free parental leave experience, and have you returning to work with confidence.

END

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For a comprehensive guide, visit the Circle In Parental Leave Checklist.

Join our circle (it’s free!) and access exclusive career resources including templates and checklists to help you manage every step of your pregnancy, parental leave and return to work journey.

Kate Pollard and Jodi Geddes are the co-founders of Circle In, a company committed to supporting working parents through their parental leave and return to work journeys with a range of practical online materials, tools and resources. We have recently launched a Stay In Touch program for businesses that builds working parent communities. This end to end online program supports, empowers and educates parents throughout their parental leave journey and helps them return to work with confidence.

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Newborn sleep expectations WHY YOU NEED TO DITCH THEM By the time our babies arrive in the world, most mums are experts on everything that comes before the birth and, in some cases, what happens during it.

What happens next, when we have a baby in our arms, is often a bit of a shock.

For many, it’s not at all what we expected or planned. But most of us will have watched friends struggling with sleepless babies and thought: that won’t be me!

Paediatric sleep consultant, Cheryl Fingleson, reveals the four newborn sleep expectations that all new parents need to ditch.

Expectation 1: ‘My baby will be different’

Expectation 2: ‘I won’t let my baby cry at night’

Newborns don’t follow the rule book. They don’t know they’re meant to feel soothed and instantly stop crying when they’re wrapped in a muslin. They don’t understand that when it’s dark it is time to sleep, or that morning is when they should be awake and alert.

In the early weeks after birth, concentrate on your recovery and getting to know your baby - this is not the time to worry and anguish over routines, rituals or why your baby doesn’t sleep more than twenty minutes at a time. Remember that babies don’t even begin to produce the sleep hormone melatonin which makes us drowsy and relaxes muscles - until they’re around three months old.

Babies tell us what they need with their cries and as the days and weeks progress you’ll learn to decipher these cues. Soon you’ll understand which indicate that your little one is tired, hungry, overstimulated or uncomfortable.

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Babies also cry because that’s what babies do and it’s a shock for them to suddenly be in the big, wide world.

Some babies need to cry before they go to sleep as a wind down technique. Some cry out in their sleep.

Be present to comfort and hold them when needed; watch for their cues. If you find it hard to settle your baby, or you feel overwhelmed, hand him to your partner, close friend or family member and take a break.

Expectation 3: ‘My baby will sleep through the night’ Babies are designed to wake frequently in the early months. They need to eat often and, if breastfed, night feeds are a vital way to build up milk supply. By all means get into good night time feeding habits from this early stage: keep the lights low, don’t play with your baby or talk loudly to her. Feed, burp, kiss and put him back to bed.

You can begin sleep-shaping and laying the foundations for good sleep habits early on, but don’t be surprised if your baby doesn’t sleep through the night until they’re four or even six months old - or even longer. Some babies who sleep through the night in the early days will suddenly start waking up months down the line.

Expectation 4: ‘My baby will be in a sleep routine from the beginning’ Newborn babies are not designed to be in a routine but they do like predictability and you can begin gently encouraging good sleep habits from around the third week.

Be careful your baby doesn’t turn day into night, so during daytime, let plenty of natural light into your home.

Go outside every day - babies sleep better after being exposed to daylight. Feed regularly - as often as needed but if it’s been more than three hours (during the day) consider waking your baby for a feed.

In the evening, make the atmosphere quieter and calmer and ensure your baby’s sleep environment is peaceful.

Turn down the lights and once your baby is six weeks old you will find you can implement a simple evening bedtime routine of bath, massage, lullaby or story, feed and bed. Put your baby in their cot when they are drowsy rather than fully asleep at least once a day.

END

Cheryl Fingleson is passionate about helping adults and children get a good night’s rest. As a certified gentle sleep coach she offers individualised solutions to long and short term sleep issues and disorders.

Sydney-based Cheryl can provide phone coaching as well as in-home consultations for babies, children and adults who struggle to get to sleep or stay asleep.

Images: Deanna Gaynor, dimages.com.au

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Where mums meet If you are a new mum, or even an experienced one, it is so valuable to have a network of other mums around you to support each other on your parenting journeys. Sara Keli shares five places you can go to start building your village.

Mothers’ group

Online

Playgroup

Mums and bubs sessions

The real benefit of mothers’ group is that you are connected with a small group of other mums who have babies at the same stage as you so you can walk the journey of motherhood together. Check with your hospital or maternal child health nurse to see if there is one available to join in your local area. Often mothers’ groups will be guided by a child health nurse for the first few weeks and then it is up to the members to keep it running so be sure to swap numbers/email addresses so you can arrange to meet up once the organised sessions end.

If you don’t have a mothers’ group available to you or you don’t connect with the mums in your group, joining a playgroup is another great option. The benefit of a playgroup is that with so many running, you can pick which day suits you best and even try out a few to find a group that you feel you gel with.

You also have the added benefit of attending with mums at various stages of their parenting journeys with the experience that goes along with that. Check the Playgroup Australia website to find playgroups near you.

We are so lucky to have so many online groups available to us these days and, if you forget about the trolling that sadly happens, online forums, groups and apps are such a great way to meet other mums. An app called Peanut has recently launched in Australia and it helps you find mums nearby who have common interests to you. Facebook is also obviously a great place to look for groups either based on your location or interests. Do be careful with the information you give out online.

Whether it is a sing-along at the library, a babes in a rms session at the movies or a mums and bubs fitness class, keep your eye out for opportunities to not only meet other mums but also introduce your baby to new environments and experiences. If it is a regular thing such as a library session or a fitness class you will likely find the same mums attending each week so you can start to get to know them a build a friendship from there.

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The park

If you are at the local park, there is nothing stopping you from striking up a conversation with another mum.

The same applies for play centres or other places you take your kids. You might not be swapping numbers at your first meeting but if you hit it off you could suggest meeting at the park again the following week. Who knows what kind of friendship might blossom?

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Sara Keli is the Editor of Kid Magazine. When she isn’t writing, designing or creating, you can find her enjoying the sunshine on her back deck with her two daughters or escaping into a good book.

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books for baby

It’s never too early to start developing a love of reading! Board books are perfect for babies – sturdy and drool-resistant. Here are 9 of our favourites.

1 What Does Baby Want? by Tupera Tupera, bookdepository.com 2 We’re Going on a Bear Hunt by Michael Rosen, bookdepository.com 3 Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown, bookdepository.com 4 Jane Foster’s ABC by Jane Foster, bookdepository.com 5 Emma: An Emotions Primer by Jennifer Adams, bookdepository.com 6 Moo, Baa, La La La! : Lap Edition by Sandra Boynton, bookdepository.com 7 Feminist Baby by Loryn Brantz, bookdepository.com 8 Hello Baby! by Mem Fox, bookdepository.com 9 That’s Not My Unicorn by Fiona Watt, bookdepository.com kidmagazine.com.au 42

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A Natural Choice 10 years ago the word organic was reserved to the vocab of the new age hippies but these days more and more people are making the switch to natural and organic products. Organic produce is readily available in supermarkets and brands specialising in organic are on the rise. But is switching to organics right for your family? Sara Keli shares three questions you need to ask yourself when thinking of making the switch.

Do you know enough about natural/organic products?

Just because you read something on the internet doesn’t mean it is true. And likewise, if a friend is telling you about the benefits of switching to natural or organic products, you should always do your own research to check the validity of claims made.

Through online toxin-free store, Biome, I was introduced to the term “Greenwashing”, that is where claims made about “natural products” are misleading or glossed over. If you are switching to natural/organic then be sure you know what you are buying and that you are actually getting what you pay for.

Why are you making the switch?

Can you afford it?

Organic products can often cost more, so if buying them for your family is going to send you broke then perhaps you need to reconsider. But if after doing your own research, you decide that there are great benefits in switching to organic for a particular product then you can make a single switch without needing to clear out the whole house to go 100% natural! It doesn’t have to be an all in approach so weigh up the cost vs. the benefit and make a decision from there.

There is a wealth of information out there these days about organic/natural living. You know your family and your needs and are the best person to make decisions for that. Listen to what others share but don’t feel pressured to make your decisions based on what they are doing. At the end of the day you are doing the best for your family - don’t feel guilty about that. Whether you go all organic, just a few products or stick with what it is that you already use, you should never feel that there is anything wrong with the choices you make.

Win

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a natural prize pack for your baby!

Enter at kidmagazine.com.au/win NSW Permit No. LTPM/17/02510

Sara Keli is the Editor of Kid Magazine.

When she isn’t writing, designing or creating, you can find her enjoying the sunshine on her back deck with her two daughters or escaping into a good book.

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BABY’S FIRST BANANA MUFFINS As your baby moves on from purees and enters the stage of finger foods, you will be tempted to offer them sweet baked treats such as banana bread, muffins and other delights. It’s important when starting to introduce them to these types of options, that we aim to avoid using added sweeteners and opt for natural alternatives. These delicious banana muffins use the sweetness of bananas, dates and cinnamon to ensure that they will love it and want more.

30 minutes | Serves 24 | Dairy-free, Gluten-free and Vegetarian- friendly.

Ingredients 2 Large Ripe Bananas 3 Eggs ½ Cup Coconut Milk 1 Tsp Vanilla Powder/ Extract 4-6 Medjool Dates, Pitted 1 Tsp Ground Cinnamon 2 Tbs Coconut Oil, Melted ¾ Cup Buckwheat Flour ¼ Cup Coconut Flour 1 Tsp Baking Powder ½ Tsp Baking Soda kidmagazine.com.au 44

Instructions 1. Preheat oven to 180ºC and line a muffin tray with muffin cases.

2. Place bananas, eggs, coconut milk, coconut oil, vanilla powder and dates into the bowl of a food processor and process until smooth.

3. Add the rest of the ingredients and process until smooth and well combined.

4. Spoon about 1-2 tbs of batter into each muffin case and bake in the oven for 15-20 mins.

5. Turn out onto a wire rack to let them cool completely.

Serve immediately or store in an airtight container in the fridge for up to 3 days or freeze for up to 4 months.

APRICOT & PEAR COMPOTE Introducing solids to babies is an exciting time, but it can also bring with it a range of new issues such as constipation. This homemade compote is a great way to ensure that your baby doesn’t get clogged up and stays regular. It can be used in countless ways, including as a stand-alone puree, in yogurt, mixed with porridge or as a spread on toast or crackers for later on.

Prep Time: 5 mins | Cooking Time: 45 mins | Serves: 8 Ingredients 4 pears, peeled and cored 250g dried apricots, sulphur-free 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon 1/2 vanilla pod or 1/4 tsp vanilla bean paste Filtered water Instructions 1. Place all the ingredients in a medium-sized pot and cover with filtered water.

2. Bring to the boil, reduce heat and cover with a lid. Let simmer until water is evaporated. Add more water if necessary. The more you reduce the compote the more intense the flavor and thicker the consistency.

3. Transfer compote to a blender and blend until smooth.

4. Pour in a jar and keep in the fridge.

5. Serve with yoghurt, porridge or on its own.

Serving and Storing Leftovers Serve immediately or store in a jar in the fridge for up to 5-7 days or freeze for up to 3-4 months.

Recipes by Mandy Sachar, author of Wholesome Child Nutrition Guide and Cookbook, an invaluable companion that will help support your family’s health journey while bringing the fun and enjoyment back to mealtimes. $39.99 | www.wholesomechild.com

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