REASONS YOUR PROTEST WON’T WORK IN THE FLORIDA KEYS

7. The organizers use Tik Tok. The Keys still operate on Facebook or the dark web.

6. “If it doesn’t affect the price of Tito’s, it doesn’t affect me.”

5. Most residents in the Keys are too busy actively protesting a dozen other things on social media to give a shit about your protest.

4. Protests require dedicated staffing, planning and affordable lodging. ’Nuff said.

3. There is no real TDC data that the movement will actually “put heads in beds.”

2. Your protest doesn’t include a silent auction, cash bar, goodie bags or commemorative T-shirt.

1. Your protest conflicts with happy hour.