OLD AND ALONE

Joan was almost 80 when her husband died. They'd been together over 50 years, spending their adult lives doing everything together. They raised a family, pulled through times of financial hardship, dealt with his later life health concerns, all the while sustaining a strong relationship and a secure happy home.

Like many couples they'd each had their own areas of responsibility, with Joan primarily running the household. Upon being widowed she'd had to learn to deal with all the 'other' things; the finances, the car, arranging necessary home repairs. All outside of her comfort zone, but she persevered.

Being alone she was determined not to be a burden to anyone else and had contacted several local social clubs and groups geared to older people. She learned to play bridge, joined a weekly walking and lunch group, enrolled in classes for Tai

Chi and Egyptology, attended a weekly talk with the University of the Third Age. Many of these activities were within a twenty-minute walk of her home, a pleasant bonus on a nice day.

She'd rejoined a weekly whist group and attended a musical social once a month. All in all, there were interesting social activities in her diary every day of the week, bringing with them associated conversations, relationships and friendships. Joan had never been interested in technology and so had never learned to use a computer or get to grips with a mobile phone. The regular entries in her social diary were her way of maintaining contact with the outside world and it worked well, giving her something to do each day. Once a week she'd do her supermarket shop and then attend her various clubs.

These activities provided much of what she needed; routine, motivation, they brought order to the day, stimulus, human contact, mental and physical exercise, plus a reason to dress up and leave the house. But now she's in the position of finding herself with all semblance of normal life gone. A lady who is fit, elderly and living alone now has to reorient herself to a very different, solitary way of life.

Since the pandemic it's become apparent that there are many people like Joan, people who are also 'not a bother' to anyone, who are elderly, fit, independent and who live alone. They have, until now, maintained a structure to their days, with various clubs and groups enabling them to lead meaningful, active, satisfactory, sociable lives. At the start of the pandemic all these clubs and activities had to close and there is no reopening date in sight. Their members have lost the lifeline to their interesting day-to-day lives. Many will not have access to online activity, don't want or need social services or charities to intervene, but simply need the structure of their lives to return.

Yes, they may have loving families who try to keep in contact, who may be allowed to visit with care, but the loss of independence and way of life for older people who are living alone, still taking good enough care of themselves, who are fit and mobile, is bound to seriously affect their mental and physical ability and agility.

With their friendship groups disbanded it's not easy to keep in touch with people who may be 'friends', but who in reality are only light or nodding acquaintances, people with whom they may share pleasantries.

Consequently, much interest in life and the motivation to do things also diminishes. Routine chores and television can only sustain for so long! And in the future when these places do reopen how many older people will have the courage or enthusiasm to venture back after so many months of cautionary messages and fear? Lockdown for them may well be a sentence to the end of their lives outside of their homes.

Susan Leigh A.C.H.Qual, M.N.C.H.(Acc), M.S.M.S.(Acc), H.A.Reg from Altrincham,Cheshire, is a counsellor, hypnotherapist, relationship counsellor,writer & media contributor who offers help with relationship issues,stress management,assertiveness and confidence. She works with individual clients,couples and provide corporate workshops and support.

Reach for the stars. Whatever your dreams for 2021, go for it. Your friends and family will support you in pursuing a special aim. You won’t shy away from competition and this paves the way for you to take on a leadership role in April. People look to you for guidance as you act as a stepping stone to help others achieve their dreams. Creative pastimes will be therapeutic in the autumn. Having a rewarding hobby is an effective way of handling stress.

Stay focused on your goals. Important decisions will be made in January. July will bring another chance for you to stop and consider various options that are available. You will know you made the right choice when doors start opening up for you. Live within your means and this will allow you to afford the occasional treat without feeling guilty. By the end of the year you will be finding new ways to make your money work for you.

Balance is key in all relationships. Life has been challenging and this can make you cling too tightly to your partner and close friends. Being overly possessive could cause serious damage to a relationship. Start trusting people more. In order for you to be able to effectively help others, you need to nurture yourself. Make the autumn a time to rest, relax and recharge your batteries. Take up interests and activities that will make your private life more enjoyable.

Cash & Career Let go of worries you have about your job as the year begins. Fill your time with activities you enjoy and you will feel less stressed. Your life will have a more positive feel to it and career goals will have a happy outcome in the spring. Keep on top of your workload in the summer and you will be ready for a great opportunity to advance your career in October. Take a practical approach to financial affairs in July and again, as the year ends. Put extra money into a savings or pension plan.

Gemini

Joining forces with a partner will yield creative and emotional rewards in January. Are you single? You will meet someone in February, with whom you will have a profound connection. You long to take that holiday you’ve been dreaming about. You’ve always enjoyed exploring unfamiliar territory and you will be making travel a main priority during the latter half of the year. The autumn will bring a chance to break away from arrangements and relationships that aren’t working to pursue a different path.

Don’t be ashamed because you dream of being successful and you want a little status. If a job vacancy comes up in the spring and you’ve got what it takes to go for it, get an application sent in immediately. September will be a lucky month for you. Push forward to the place you want to be. Remember: if you can conceive it, you can achieve it. Doing a great job with a big assignment will improve your prospects as the year ends. Love & Life Cancer Making exciting pans for the future will add spice to your relationships as the year begins. The spring will bring a happy reunion. Focusing on aspects of your life that need more stability helps you strike a healthy balance between your personal life and professional. Taking regular breaks will be good for your health in the summer. Positive change in October will help you move forward with a personal plan. Take the chance to study an interesting subject as the year ends.

You will gain financially in the spring through a legal settlement, inheritance or big windfall. This will be your chance to bring improvements into your life. Book the holiday you have been dreaming about. Launch a home improvement program. If you’re thinking about moving, start looking for a new place in an area that appeals to your spiritual side. Developing creative ideas could lead to a profitable business opportunity in the autumn. A household repair project will take a toll on your budget in December.

Leo

Friends have stood by you through thick and thin and you want to find ways to show your appreciation. Pampering a partner, buying gifts for friends when they least expect it and watching for ways to do someone a good turn will be rewarding. As you keep good karma going, you will attract more abundance. Be prepared to put time, energy and effort into realising your aims.

Setting goals isn’t enough; you have to be ready to fight hard to achieve. Your power and drive will bring rewards as the year ends.

Money will be tight during the first few months of the year. Don’t be tempted to give a close friend or relative a loan if you can’t afford it. You will need emergency savings to cover unexpected expenses in April. A promotion or pay rise will improve your financial situation in July. Your creative skills will impress people in power in the autumn. Take up a challenge to join a talented team who are developing a daring project. Splash out on luxuries as the year ends. You deserve a little pampering.

Make time during the first quarter of the year to relax and recharge your batteries. Your partner and other loved ones will appreciate the chance to relax in your company. Keep life – and that includes relationships – simple. Don’t look for problems where there aren’t any and avoid topics that cause conflict. A reunion in the summer will bring some sentimental moments. Spend some time in nature in the autumn. Choose activities that bring contentment. Reading and art projects will keep your mind calm.

Planets meet in your job sector as February ends to boost your professional standing. Play your cards right and you could be offered an impressive job or promotion. You will be asked to make changes in existing methods and procedures between July and October. This will bring about radical improvements. If you have a choice in the summer between spending and saving your money, make investment your first priority.

Libra Love & Life

Your romantic zone will be triggered by Jupiter and Saturn bringing moments of joy and also the chance to make serious relationship commitments. Are you single? Getting involved with someone new won’t be taken lightly. Saturn will hold you back from moving too fast and your investment of emotion and time in this relationship will pay off in a big way in October. You’re taking life and relationships very seriously. Let your inner child come out to play in November. Remind yourself how it feels to have fun.

Mixing with extravagant friends who have more money than sense in January will be cause for regret. It’s not a good idea to splash out on luxuries you can do without. Anxiety over finances will have a negative effect on your health. With the help of a financial advisor you will be able to consolidate bills and lower the interest rate. An unexpected career opportunity in the spring will be your chance to get paid for your creativity. Your contribution towards a charity venture will be Scorpio acknowledged as the year ends. Love & Life If you’ve been holding back from committing yourself to a romantic or business relationship, the start of the year will be a good time to make a firm decision. This choice will be based more on your intuitive response than on any amount of facts and figures. Are you single? You will feel an instant attraction to someone you meet on a journey in the spring.

Big changes are likely in the summer that will transform your life in a good way.

Money news in the spring will be good. You will be seeing improvements in your work and financial situation. Moving to a new home or making improvements to your existing abode could be on the cards for you in June. A home repair job will cost more than you are expecting in the summer. Be sure you have money in reserve for sudden expenses. There will be a triumphant recovery from a setback, mid-November. You will surprise and surpass the opposition after a long and exhausting power struggle.

Love & Life Sagittarius You’ve always been adventuresome so don’t be surprised if you start the year feeling restless and wanting a change. You just long to travel the world. Look into the possibility of booking a trip for later in the year so you have something to look forward to. You may not be touring a glittering metropolis but visiting a seaside holiday resort will be a great way to reconnect with your partner. A close relationship or friendship will assume greater importance in your life as the year ends. Your partner will appreciate your thoughtful and loving gestures.

Your restless energy will make it hard for you to get into any kind of routine early in the year. Just refrain from destructive behaviour that might put pressure on your closest relationships or damage your financial status. If things in your life keep going wrong, you may need to change direction before you see a positive outcome. Rushing into financial deals without considering the consequences could be cause for regret in the summer as it won’t be easy to dissolve these transactions. A stalled career or financial opportunity will start to move forward as the year ends. Capricorn Love & Life

Your priority as the year begins will be to find ways to let go of past issues that are preventing you from moving forward. Holding onto old hurts will take its toll on your emotional health and selfesteem. Forgiving yourself and others for wrongs of the past will be a good start. There will be a need to get together with a partner or close friend in the summer to decide whether you are both aiming for similar goals. If it turns out you want different things, find a way to compromise.

Money is tight as the year begins. Friends who are also experiencing financial hardship will be relieved when you suggest postponing arrangements that are likely to cost a lot of money. Career decisions in April will enable you to take practical steps to reach a professional goal. Let go of ideas that aren’t working in September. Take this as a sign that you are being guided to try something new. You will intuitively make choices that take you to where you need to be.

Aquarius

Don’t feel guilty about having fun and Putting time and effort into your enjoying life in January. You deserve a relationships will make you happy and little happiness. Besides, generating those around you happy too. Confusion positive energy will uplift those in the summer months will have around you too. Are you something to do with a changing career single? Be quick to react to a situation. The autumn will be a great chance of getting time to travel or to take up a spiritual romantically involved in practice. You will be reminded of how

June. Rearrange your much you have grown as a person and priorities and devote how in some areas, it was necessary to more time to fun pursuits change direction in order to reach your in the summer. When you true potential. A romantic holiday in the neglect your creative side, you become autumn will be like a dream come true. tense and tired. You can offset this by taking up a new hobby. Taking up a Cash & Career spiritual practice will be rewarding in the Money problems could cause tension in autumn. Intuition will play a big part in a close relationship. This in turn will take your decision making as the year ends. a toll on your health. Discuss this calmly and you will find a compromise. Avoid Cash & Career any kind of risk in the spring. Your aim It will be worth it if you’re thinking about should be to keep life as rearranging the domestic budget in stable and secure as order to launch a home improvement possible. Even if your program. Painting a drab room, job is boring, don’t be extending your kitchen or landscaping tempted to leave a the garden will make you enjoy the time stable position. you are spending at home. If you’re Instead, an ongoing thinking of buying some property, April job search will eventually lead you to will be a good month to look for a new the perfect position for you. A new place to live. Be cautious about making source of income will become available binding financial agreements in October. in September. As the year ends, money

New career doors will open as the will be coming in more steadily than it year ends. has before.

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