April 22, 2019

GOLDEN FORKS Monday, April 22, 2019

kentuckykernel

The awards that everyone hates to win.

JILLIAN JONES | STAFF

Monday, April 22, 2019

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LETTERS FROM THE EDITORS

Monday, April 22, 2019

When I was 8 years old, the teenage boy teams at every local candidate’s watch party; down the street started a lawn care business. and a bomb threat to the university that creOur neighbors could read all about it in the ated a bizarre 24-hour news cycle. Not only first ever edition of the neighborhood newslet- did we survive it; we (in my biased opinion) ter, whose name has been lost to time, which covered every event well. was entirely produced by a certain curious We squeezed nearly every senior member 8-year-old. of our staff into our tiny, tiny newsroom to After finishing my little newspaper, I put celebrate Christmas with Cane’s chicken and it in every mailbox in the neighborhood and Secret Santa gifts, spending a rare night off not making a paper but enjoying waited for everyone to read it. one another’s company.

No one ever did.

We drove about 12 hours south Instead, every single copy endto Orlando to cover the football ed up back in my own mailbox, team’s historic win in the Citrus collected and put there by our Bowl, which was many people’s mail carrier with a note scrawled dreams come true, then we togethover the top issue that said someer visited Disney World, where evthing like “You can’t do this.” eryone’s dreams come true.

When I was 17 years old, the We won the General Excellence university I had just begun attendAward for student publications of Bailey Vandiver ing sued the student newspaper I our size in the state at the annuwas just about to write my first al Kentucky Press Association convention in article for.

January. I cheered with pride in my heart and The editors at the time had requested docu- tears in my eyes. ments via the Open Records Act, and UK filed We raised hell, along with other student a lawsuit against the Kernel to avoid handing journalists, in the words of Peter Baniak, them over. It was the university’s way of sayoutgoing KPA president and Lexington Hering, “You can’t do this.” ald-Leader editor and general manager.

Well, in my experience, Kernel editors arIt’s what we set out to do. en’t really bothered by what they’re told they My year as editor has ended, and as I look can’t do. In fact, it’s typically just more motivation to do what supposedly can’t be done. back, this is what I know to be true: We did what we aimed to do. There is more to be Over my last three years at the Kernel, done, always, but words cannot express the and especially during my past year as ediprivilege it was to be a part of what the Kernel tor-in-chief, I’ve seen over and over again the has accomplished this year. extraordinary things that the staff of the KenJust as my high school senior quote was by tucky Kernel can do.

Hermione Granger, I’m not sure this reflecWe stood in the freezing rain on State Street tion would be complete without a Harry Potter as frenzied fans’ celebration turned to dereference, and naturally one came to my mind. struction. We were the only news source on The Marauders Map, after being used for the scene, and I spent the next week granting troublemaking by students such as Harry Potpermission to more than 20 news outlets who ter and the Weasley twins, can be wiped clean wanted to use our footage. of evidence with one simple phrase. It’s what We turned cars into mobile newsrooms to comes to my mind when I reflect on my time cover President Donald Trump’s visit to Richas editor, another way to say that we did what mond and former Vice President Joe Biden’s we set out to do— that we raised hell. fish fry in support of Amy McGrath.

Mischief managed.

We survived a seven-day stretch that included two devastating football losses to Georgia and Tennessee; a less-than-ideal start to the basketball season with a loss to Duke; elec- Bailey Vandiver tion night, with reporter and photographer

outgoing Editor-in-Chief

I’ve been interested in journalism since my junior year of high school. During a school trip to Prague we were told to break into small groups and roam the streets of the old medieval city, asking strangers controversial political questions.

At one point, our group asked an American tourist what he thought about President Putin’s recent movement of nuclear weapons to the nearby Crimean Peninsula. A German man, who had been fidgeting in his seat next to the American for most of the interview, took special exception to the question and suddenly exploded into a heated tirade.

Red in the face, he told us our questions were worthless because they were so obviously written with an American right-wing slant. He then went on to advise us that we ought to worry more about John McCain than Vladimir Putin. His answer and reaction were Rick Childress fascinating to me. When I learned later that you could make a whole career out of asking people hard questions, naturally I was all in.

I decided to study journalism because I believe that everyone has an interesting and important story to tell. I began writing for the Kentucky Kernel, almost two years ago now, because I wanted to tell the stories that are important to my campus and my hometown. I wanted to become the Kernel’s Editor-in-Chief because I want to serve our campus by leading a Kernel staff that is committed to telling the important stories of our community. Telling the truth, in an accurate and compelling way, is a public service. I’m excited to lead a staff and a newspaper that has a long tradition of doing just that.

I’m the son of a Filipina—my mom immigrated here from the Philippines when she was 20—and of a native Kentuckian in my dad. I’ve lived in Lexington my entire life and I decided to come to UK because it felt like home and because it was much cheaper than my other options.

College has taught me how to power nap and that there is never such a thing as too much caffeine. Aside from the Kernel, I’ve worked in a small factory, as a barista, as a middle school lacrosse coach and as a part-time assistant on the Lexington Herald-Leader’s sports desk.

I have the tremendous challenge of following Bailey Vandiver, our outgoing Editor-in-Chief. Under Bailey’s guidance, the Kernel has covered a wild ride of school year. Kernel staffers covered a historic football season, a car-flipping State Street, a bomb threat, the ever-pervasive issue of suicide on a college campus and many more truthful and compelling stories.

I look forward to next school year and I look forward to serving the UK community.

- Rick Childress incoming Editor-in-Chief spring 2019 | 3

Monday, April 22, 2019

G O L D E N F O R K S

Years ago — or so the legend goes — an embittered Kernel editor came back to the office upset, hurt, insulted.

A prominent campus figure had unfairly harangued the young reporter for an offense that he did not commit.

It was at that point, in the heat and sweat of tension, that the young editor vowed revenge. From those feelings of hate, the Golden Forks were born. As a testament to that young reporter we take it upon ourselves to strike back with venomous pleasure at those who have wronged the mighty “Fourth Estate.”

Editor’s note: OK, OK that’s a lie. We’re a bunch of sarcastic, immature college students who feel like venting their frustrations at the end of the year. It’s unfortunate that some of you must bear the brunt of that. But take comfort in the fact that in about a month the summer Kernel begins and then comes the fall with the man you love to hate, Editor-in-chief Rick Childress.

You are encouraged to make this man’s life a living hell.

Until then, if you’re upset, feel free to send in letters to the editor, as always.

But this is last issue, so they won’t get printed. We’ll read them though.

Have a good summer.

This blurb was adapted from the April 28, 1989, edition of the Golden Forks Awards.

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LEAST QUALIFIED TO GO TO A BASKETBALL SCHOOL: SARAH LADD As March Madness approached, the Kernel staff raised the idea of doing a bracket challenge. “I don’t know anything about basketball,” opinions editor Sarah Ladd (and others) protested.

“I’ll come in last.” Those of us who follow basketball SARAH LADD more closely offered reassurance: “It’s often those who know the least about basketball who win, because March Madness is just that random.” Well, we were mistaken: Sarah did, in fact, come in last place, and this is her punishment. As much as you studied during your years at UK, Sarah, maybe you should’ve studied a little more basketball. This is UK,

after all.

MOST LIKELY TO COME IN SECOND: THE COLLEGE HEIGHTS HERALD This award goes to the College Heights Herald at Western Kentucky University, mostly because they need one. After having a hard year and coming in second to the Kentucky Kernel at the Kentucky Press Association collegiate awards, they used their marketing award in their Office spinoff marketing video and are apparently “coming for (the Kernel)” next year. Until that time, here’s an award to tide you over.

MOST LIKELY TO LEAVE YOU ON READ: ELI CAPILOUTO In September, the Kernel editorial board wrote an editorial entitled “Dear President Capilouto: A letter from Kernel student employees” after many of our student employees attended the oral arguments for UK’s lawsuit against us and Capilouto did not attend. We wrote the editorial to get his attention and initiate an important dialogue, but alas, he must not have known what to say back. We would say he ghosted us, but he is still suing us, so we know he’s still got us on his mind.

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Monday, April 22, 2019

#1 INSTAGRAM INFLUENCER: ELLEN CALIPARI

BEST CONTENT (BESIDES US): UK LIBRARIES TWITTER The Best Content Award (besides the Kernel of course) goes to the UK Libraries Twitter account.

Since the start of the Spring Semester the anonymous tweeter behind this account has brought everyone’s favorite library “Willy T” to life.

Make sure you’re following this account for an abundance of relatable tweets and memes - most of which are about crying in the library.

There’s not a person in Kentucky who doesn’t know the Calipari name, but we think a new member of the family is now in the fan favorite spot. Ellen Calipari has taken the Big Blue Nation by storm with her Instagram posts on her account, @cal_ mrs. From sharing about her dogs to cheering on #12 (her son, Brad Calipari) to unabashedly roasting her husband for not moving the trash cans when needed, Mrs. Cal has all the entertainment we need. We’d also like to congratulate ourselves for knowing she was awesome before it was cool: We wrote a feature on her last April.

MOST LIKELY TO LOOK LIKE A LAYGROUND: ROSE STREET

Most Likely to Look Like a Playground award Rose Street for giving students the opportunity to their inner kindergartner with colorful paintings dhood games. This year UK finally blocked off Rose Street and decided this space would be an ace to focus on mental health. After all, nothing ess relief like playing a game of twister on asphalt ying to avoid skateboarders and pedestrians.

1 VALET PARKING SERVICE IN COMMUNITY: STATE STREET

mber, UK celebrated ball win against the Gators, a team UK had en in 31 years. As me festivities ensued, State Street revelers t upon themselves to, let’s say “move,” a cle during the celeons. If you want your o be moved for free, even if it potentially ends up upside n, State Street during gameday is the place to park.

THE MOST DRIP AWARD: BRAD CALIPARI This award goes to Brad Calipari because no one else could pull off those outfits.

MOST LIKELY TO FILL YOUR INBOX: BENNY SNELL Every UK student knows the infamous, “It’s ya boy, Benny Snell” call. Each Saturday us students would answer our phones and hear Benny’s lively voice, or we would listen to the voicemail later. It even became a circulating meme, and for that reason, we are giving Benny this award.

spring 2019 | 5

QUESO OR GUAC: Mostly A’s: GUACAMOLE! You’re no stranger to hard work and you know that it’s required to produce enjoyable results. You should be making, eating, and living your life for this chunky, but creamy dip!

Mostly B’s: QUESO! Smooth and simple is your preference. Dipping into this hot and cheesy delicacy is something you should be doing regularly.

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WHICH GATTON ARE YOU? If your answers were majority a’s then you’re the $65 million Gatton College of Business Building.

If your answers were majority b’s then you’re the $200 million Gatton Student Center.

PHOTOS BY MICHAEL CLUBB AND JORDAN PRATHER

THE MANY FACES OF CAL Monday, April 22, 2019

classifieds Featured ** 3,4,5 Bedrooms Available ** Walk to Campus for Aug 2019 Text 859‑513‑1206 Today Wanted‑ Farm Work flexible days/ hours. All farm work including weed‑eating, brush clearing, lifting and other misc. farm work. $10/hr (859) 396‑7543 or 3dayfarm@gmail.­com

For Rent 1-9 Bedroom 1 and 2 Bedroom apartments across from Gatton and UK LAW leasing for Fall 2020. These go FAST. $795‑$1350 depending on unit. For a tour call 859‑621‑3128.

Now leasing for fall. We have 2‑6 bed‑ room apartment and houses. W/D, pets allowed with fee. All within walking distance to cam­pus. www.myukapt.com

www.ukfcu.org | 859.264.4200

HOUSE. Three Bedrooms Nicholas‑ ville Road $950. Visit our website for details on all our 1, 2, 3, 4 bedrooms properties. www.­KaufmannProperties. com

4 Bedroom 219 University‑Back. 4‑bed/2‑bath.

Large great room with kitchen/bar.

W/D DW. Large closets. $1680+elec/ water or $1900 incl utilities.

859‑619‑5454.

4BR Two Blocks from UK Med Center The Tardis House has four large bedrooms, a spacious kitchen and two modern bath­rooms. New appliances, W/D, pet‑friendly yard, bicycle shed, optional garage with loft. Perfect for visiting faculty or students. $1800/ month. Available August 1. (possible June/July sublet) 859‑351‑2363

Walk to UK! WM properties Pre‑Leasing 1‑6 Bd houses for Fall 2019 www.waynemichaelproperties.com

AVAILABLE AUGUST 2019: 424‑A WOOD­LAND AVE: 4 BEDROOM DUPLEX with 2 Baths. Only 5 minutes from the University of Kentucky! $1500 per month plus utilities all electric. See details at www.mpmlex.com call or text KATHY 859‑285‑1361

1 Bedroom

5 Bedroom

600 sq ft one bedroom one bath apartment quiet good neighbors, hardwood, tall ceiling charming space and woodwork available July 1, no pets, good off street parking $835 plus utilities. 859‑333‑5147

5 BEDROOM off Linden Walk 2 Full Bath Off‑Street Parking Call for more information: 704‑905‑5312

2 Bedroom

2 Bedrooms ‑204 Transcript #1‑ 2Bed, 1Bath Utilities Included ‑ $850/Month ‑210 Transcript‑ 1Bed, 1Bath Utilities Included‑ $700/Month

2 or 3 Bedroom Townhouse Coach Light Woods . 1625 Nicholasville Rd #603. 1225/ mo. plus utils. No smok‑ ing. No pets. Avail­able May 211 Waller 2‑bed/1‑bath. Brand New Units. Granite stainless W/D DW Large closets Parking $1250 incl utilities Wi‑Fi. 859‑619‑5454.

3 Bedroom 127 Montmullion 3Bd, Available June 1st, has Private Parking lot, Appliances and W/D. Rent is $1275.00. Call 859‑227‑8331 or email ixdelshad@gmail.com 3 bedroom, 2 bath apartment, 266 Rose St available August 1 no pets, good parking 1200 sq ft. $1495 plus utilities. 859‑333‑5147 3BR/2BA house very close to campus (right next to William T Young Library). $1200/month +utilities. Cov‑ ered front and back porch, plenty of off street parking. Spa­cious rooms, wash‑ er/dryer included. Call 859‑644‑4415.

Monday, April 22, 2019

August 1. Newer 2, 3, 4 and 5 BR, 2 car garage homes near campus. From 499.00 per person per month including utilities. James McKee Builder / Broker 859‑221‑7082 (call or text).

Lexingtonhomeconsul­tants.com Great properties for rent, walk to cam‑ pus. W/D included. (859) 619‑3232. kmartin.lex@gmail.com www.myuk4rent.com

Help Wanted Leasing Office Assistant. Strong communica­tion & organizational skills needed. Word/Excel required. Work directly with owner. Flexible. Call Jeff (859) 489‑0908 or email resume to universitypropertieslex@g­mail.com Pepperhill Farms Day Camp is hiring day­camp counselors for the summer.

You must enjoy working with children and have a tremendous work ethic.

Activities in camp involve swimming, horseback, canoeing, archery, ropes, arts and cratfts and more. To set up an appointment for interveiw call 859‑277‑6813 or 885‑6215 or email pepper­hillkidz.com Summer Jobs ‑Laborers: Learn home repair skills that will last a lifetime.

Local, full‑time over summer. Great work environment, dif­ferent every day.

Must have own reliable transpor‑ tation. Contact sharon@anderson­ communities.com

2019‑2020 School Year

3 Bedrooms ‑371 Aylesford #3 – 3Bed, 1Bath $975/Month

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4 Bedrooms ‑220 University#A – 4Bed, 2Bath $1550/Month ‑220 University #B – 4Bed, 2Bath $1600/Month Please contact Tyrell Hayden, (859) 585‑0047 or tyrell@lexingtonrental‑ homes.net 3 and 6 bedroom units ($350 per bedroom), very close to campus, parking included, se­curity cameras, large living areas, full kitchen including dishwasher. Move in bonuses available for immediate occupancy. Please visit www.lexingtonrentalhomes.com or call Tyrell 859‑585‑0047 or Jordan 859‑559‑8974

FEDERALLY INSURED BY NCUA

spring 2019 | 7

Monday, April 22, 2019

QUIZZES

WHICH GATTON ARE YOU?

QUIZ BY RICK CHILDRESS

How do you like your social staircases? a. With a big metal sculpture above them. b. With a little wildcat sitting on them.

How much do you want your dream house to cost? a. $65 million b. $200 million Favorite lunch spot? a. Brioche Doree b. Chick-fil-A Favorite street to cross during rush hour traffic? a. South Limestone b. Avenue of Champions How do you pronounce Gatton? a. Rhymes with Latin b. Ends in Ton

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QUESO OR GUAC???

QUIZ BY JILLIAN JONES

Which seasons do you enjoy the most? a. Winter and Fall b. Spring and Summer How do you find a solution? a. By putting in hard, long work b. By finding the quickest way Describe your fashion sense: a. Texture & pattern b. Solid & simple

JILLIAN JONES | STAFF

What are your preferred experiences? a. Adventure & excitement b. Chill & relaxed What colors do you prefer? a. Cool colors (blues/greens) b. Warm colors (reds/yellows)

LOOK FOR ANSWERS ON PAGE 6!

KAITLYN GUMM | STAFF