IN HIS OWN WORDS Ray Mayoliz

{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE { FOR A GOOD CAUSE { IN HIS OWN WORDS } } } LET ME TELL YOU A LITTLE BIT ABOUT MYSELF...

“Let me tell you a little bit about

myself that some may not know.”- Ray Mayoliz

Born in 1968 in the Bronx NY to a teen mother and teen father. A pair of youngsters that would not stay together not long after I was born. Although my dad did not play an active role in my upbringing I knew who my father was and he made attempts throughout the years to connect. I did gain a step-father who was good to me and my mother for the most part as a provider but lacked in many areas.

My mother did the best with everything that was thrown at her and has taught me many valuable lessons in life. Some things my brother and I were exposed to may not have been great choices but they were all lessons learned. We owe her for an upbringing that was full of many great memories and just like all families there were some dark moments, however we have prevailed.

I learned what poverty and fear was growing up in the 70’s in the Bronx. Dilapidated buildings and rubble everywhere as we went through some scary times with the drug epidemic,

BY RAY MAYOLIZ

buildings being burned down by arsonist and living in fear in 1977 because of a serial killer the Son of Sam – David Berkowitz. I remember these moments as if they happened yesterday.

Although all this was happening I still had friends on the block that I

will always remember.

Transitioning to Upstate NY a place that was called the “Flower City”, I use to visit Rochester NY before moving here. Not having cars in NY City, we always traveled by train, the trip to Rochester was no different – an 8 hour trip on Amtrak was a highlight for me as a youngster as we would leave tall buildings, cement parks and no greenery to passing farms while staring out the window of the train and seeing animals, trees and fall foliage, a greenery that I was not exposed to growing up.

Upon getting to Rochester to visit my dad , my thought was everyone in Rochester is rich as they all had or lived in private family homes – there was no real projects or buildings that I was accustomed to living in.

I wasn’t the greatest kid in NYC and picked up some bad street habits, moving to Rochester was like a new beginning for me and my family. I didn’t have to fight every day, I could be nice and people would say thank you – this was all new to me but I embraced it and was able to establish myself with a new look at life. I never drank and I never smoked and always stood my ground and sometimes still find myself saying no to people offering.

I attended Catholic school for 7th and 8th Grade in a predominantly Italian neighborhood in the 80’s and enjoyed those years at St. Anthony’s of Padua and off to RCSD Edison Tech from 1982-1986.

“The focus for our ROCMBK is to work with Boys and Young men of Color (BYMOC) and create a cradle to career path for all black and brown boys.”

“Upon getting to Rochester to visit my dad , my thought was everyone in Rochester is rich as they all had or lived in private family homes – there was no real projects or buildings that I was accustomed to living in.”

I enjoyed high school, high school sports and of course having girlfriend’s lol. I was not the brightest when it came to getting great grades but I was an average student in my eyes and didn’t think much of the future so I didn’t push myself the way I know I was capable of. I took a shop class that not many people consider in a high school. I took aviation as I had dreams of being a pilot one day or an astronaut like Major Tony Nelson – yes a character on the television show I dream of Jeannie, I just dated myself-lol. I was able to learn how to fly small engine planes in high school and when I tell people this they hesitate to believe this could be remotely true. Well it is true only at Edison Tech.

I had enough credits to graduate from a regular high school my senior year but I was failing shop class because of my attendance and was removed from Edison my senior year not allowing me to graduate with my friends of 4 years and instead graduated from East Evening Night School in June of 1986. One of my biggest regrets is not walking the stage with my class. As I mentioned I was failing due to attendance, well the truth to the matter was I had a son and was working fulltime at a supermarket to support my little family. I followed my teen parent’s footsteps and made the choice that would impact my life forever. I had aspirations to be a pilot and was able to get in to Spartan School of aeronautics in Tulsa Oklahoma. I got

there but was not prepped for college life, tuitions, housing, work and living in a completely different lifestyle that was challenging along with new found freedom. I failed the 1st semester and quickly dropped out when I was told that I could never be a pilot because of my vision unless I have them corrected, my dreams shattered. Upon returning from Tulsa I tried seeking employment in many areas but none were providing me with what I needed, I needed a job with benefits and good pay and that’s when I made the decision that changed my life forever. I joined the US Army after being strongly suggested I do so considering the alternatives of a young teen father.

My life turned upside down as I had to learn to be disciplined, follow orders, learn true respect and learn things like code, honor, loyalty, dependability. I loved every day I wore the uniform and felt like I was on top of the world until this world too came crashing down as I was dealing with marital issues and financial hardships. I was discharged after my stint but would have made the Army my career if circumstances were different.

After returning home back to Rochester with now 2 children – life was just insane and hard to make ends meet and my grandmother becoming ill with Alzheimer’s an ugly disease. My mother had to put my grandmother in a nursing home and I wasn’t happy about that but there was no other choice. I reacted by

“I dedicate my story to my friend Manny Ortiz as it is my honor to be featured with you in this 2020 Edition of Rochester Men Online.”

becoming a nursing assistant to work in the very hospital my grandmother was a resident at to ensure I see her every day and ensure she was getting the best quality care. Yes I did this. Grandma passed time to move on to next job.

One thing I can say is working with people has always been me and the next few years I worked in many capacities as a Certified Nursing assistant, a Drug & Alcohol substance abuse counselor, A counselor for Individuals with HIV/Aids , A pre-release counselor for federal prisoners.

In 1998 I received a call that would change my life again. Mayor Johnson is putting together a team to work with high at risk youth we think you might be a good fit. Prayers answered a chance to make a difference with young people and give back what was given to me a second chance to change my life, I can help guide our youth to that same path I was given. I had the best co-workers ever and we as a team created something that has lasted, now in its 22nd year the Pathways to Peace program for the City of Rochester. The program has evolved throughout the years and is ever changing with the trends and needs of our youth and community. I recently have moved on from Pathways, however I will always be grateful to all the team members who have ever worn a Pathways to

“In 1998 I received a call that would change my life again. Mayor Johnson is putting together a team to work with high at risk youth we think you might be a good fit. ”

however I will always be grateful to all the team members who have ever worn a Pathways to Peace –staff shirt. I am currently now the Newly Appointed Coordinator of the Rochester NY My Brother’s Keeper Initiative- a collaborative effort with the Rochester City School District and the City of Rochester. A program created by President Obama shortly after the murder of Trayvon Martin. A program that is overseen by the Obama Foundation & NYS MBK Alliance.

The focus for our ROCMBK is to work with Boys and Young men of Color (BYMOC) and create a cradle to career path for all black and brown boys. I have been married now to my wife Carmen Outlaw-Mayoliz for 21 years and counting and she has been my rock that has allowed me to give of myself to the work. I have 5 children all who are grown and doing very well for themselves. Ray, Andre, Peter, Tiara and Sasha and 3 grandchildren whom I rarely get to see as they reside in other states.

I am also married to a passion of mine and that is my love for music. I have been a disc jockey for over 35 years and have been a Radio Dj / Personality for the last 5 years. I currently have a show on Rochester’s Number 1 Commercial Latino Radio Station 97.5 La Mega. My show is specific as it caters to the older generation from 30-60 years old as deemed Mega Clasico’s classic music from the 70’s,80’s and 90’s. My show has drawn listeners and viewers from all over the US and has reached listeners in 26 Latin American Countries, not bad for a little old Rochesterian. Tune in on Saturday Morning’s from 7 am –noon on www.lamegaroc.com Yo Te Veo – Means I see you.

I dedicate my story to my friend Manny Ortiz as it is my honor to be featured with you in this 2020Edition of Rochester Men Online. Thank you Kelly for this honor.

LANA HASANIN