Keeping Jewish - August 2021

Tradition, Inspiration and Celebration · August 2021 - Elul 5781 ·

Published by Chabad Tucson

Jewish in Vail

New Chabad center southeast of Tucson

Yes, honey

Wine made from bees and a classic cake recipe

Summer lessons 7 things learned from a robotic pool cleaner

Back to school

Useful tips on how to make homework work

Crafting a life

Custom furniture maker Jay Sherman

knows a thing or two about transformation

GUEST MUSINGS

Suggestion box for G-d The Jewish outreach and education network of Southern Arizona 2443 E 4th Street, Tucson, AZ 85719 EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR

Rabbi Yossie Shemtov REBBETZIN

Chanie Shemtov OUTREACH DIRECTOR

Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin PROGRAM DIRECTOR

Feigie Ceitlin Affiliates:

Cong. Young Israel, Chabad at the University of Arizona, Chabad on River, Chabad of Oro Valley, Chabad of Sierra Vista, Chabad Jewish Center of Vail and Lamplighter Chabad Day School of Tucson

EDITOR

Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin COPY EDITORS

Suzanne Cummins Tzirel Lite CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Feigie Ceitlin, Rivkah Katz, Nochum Kaplan, Catherine Roozman Weigensberg and Benjamin Weiss PHOTOS

Jacqueline Soffer, Michael Zaccaria, EDITORIAL INQUIRIES OR ADVERTISING

Phone: 520-955-9680 Email: info@ChabadTucson

Keeping Jewish is published in print periodically by Chabad Tucson and is distributed free in Tucson and around Southern Arizona.

Chabad Tucson does not endorse any products or services reported about or advertised in Keeping Jewish unless specifically noted. The acceptance of advertising in Keeping Jewish does not constitute a recommendation, approval or other representation of quality of products or services, or the credibility of any claims made by advertisers including, but not limited to, the kashrus of advertised food products. The use of any products or services advertised in Keeping Jewish is solely at the user’s risk and Chabad Tucson accepts no responsibility or liability in connection therewith.

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Note: “G-d” and “L-rd” are written with a hyphen instead of an “o”. This is one way we accord reverence to the sacred divine name. This also reminds us that, even as we seek G-d, He transcends any human effort to describe His reality.

By Suzanne Cummins I sometimes get into arguments with G-d. They are very one-sided because, well, He has never seemed inclined to engage back. I guess that is the natural consequence of His being all-knowing and all-powerful. But still, I think I have suggestions He might want to consider.

To be clear: I doubt the editors of this newspaper agree with anything I have to say in this article or in general for that matter. But given that my point of view is completely unrepresented anywhere (and unacceptable in most situations) I am being given the opportunity to voice my suggestions to G-d.

I think G-d made a serious design flaw when He created us. Let me start by noting what is NOT a design flaw. Most people know from a very early age that none of us get out of this life alive. G-d definitely included the whole dying thing on purpose – so you cannot think of it as an oversight or error. He has promised us a perfect eternity after Moshiach comes, so dead is not altogether dead, right? We just have to pay now, and then wait for the next part.

And therein lies the problem. We are expected to accept delayed gratification,

but He created us with limited capacity for that. He could have built patience and an easy acceptance of future rewards for current behavior into our DNA, but he didn’t. Like I said — a design flaw.

Perhaps He is trying to make up for the oversight with training – having us learn to accept delayed gratification through tools he has created. Consider the “Hold” system that we experience whenever we call customer service for anything. We wait for interminable periods on the phone and listen to HORRIBLE music, hoping a human will pick up. G-d had to be the one who put that into place. Otherwise, who would have bought such a horrific tool? Airlines had to have been divinely compelled to make us go through that queue of Muzak before being able to get a reservation.

But humans are resistant. Instead of developing patience and the acceptance of delayed gratification, we developed the internet where we can place our own reservations without waiting on the phone (which isn’t even a phone anymore – it is a computer that lets us do everything super fast). So the whole training idea isn’t working, G-d! You obviously know you should have built in this “wait for it” acceptance

right after you created us in the Garden.

You saw the whole impulse thing with Eve right away – it was obvious from the start you left something out of the basic human psyche. And now WE are left with having to deal with it.

So G-d – I suggest it isn’t too late to change us. You QS do it. Of course, first you have to admit you made a mistake... I am thinking this isn’t likely. Which is why other humans are disinclined to make this kind of suggestion. Yet I have not let that stop me.

Thank you for reading! (That was to G-d, but if any humans read this far, thank you also!)

— Suzanne Cummins is a Senior Lecturer Emeritus at the University of Arizona’s Eller College of Management

NEWS

First Rabbi in Vail ahead of High Holidays Chabad opens new Jewish center southeast of Tucson

By Benjamin Weiss In time for the upcoming High Holidays, Rabbi Sruly and Chavie Shemtov from Brooklyn, NY, have established a new Chabad Jewish Center to serve the growing needs of the Jewish population in Vail, Arizona — a southeast suburb of Tucson. The couple is the niece and nephew of Rabbi Yossie Shemtov, Executive Director of Chabad-Tucson.

“We aim to provide a place where Jews can explore and learn about their heritage and history in a non-judgmental and comfortable atmosphere,” the Rabbi said. “Our goal is to strengthen and promote Jewish pride, education and celebration.”

Their commitment is unequivocal — the Shemtovs came to Vail with their son Sholom to make Vail their permanent home.

Rabbi Shemtov came with a significant amount of experience to bring to the community. He was ordained at the Rabbinical College of American in Morristown, New Jersey, and he has served as a student rabbi in communities around the world. He has led educational and holiday programs in Bulgaria, Wyoming, South Dakota and California. He has also taught children through Torah Tutors, an online Jewish studies platform.

Mrs. Shemtov was raised in Jacksonville, Florida where she assisted her parents Rabbi Yoseph and Rivkie Kahanov in running Chabad Lubavitch of Northeast Florida. A graduate of the Di-

The 7th Mega Challah Bake of Tucson will once again be held from the comfort of your kitchen with Chabad Tucson providing a box of pre-measured ingredients and step-by-step instructions for all who sign up. The event is filled with information, interaction, and entertainment over Zoom.

The annual event, held before the Jewish New Year, has been bringing together hundreds of women and girls from around Southern Arizona for years. The Covid-19 pandemic moved the event online last year for the first time, and this opened it up to men and boys. The spirit of the event is undiminished by the online delivery.

Vail is a family-friendly area with spectacular views of the Rincon Mountains and Saguaro National Park. Not surprisingly, over the past few years, Vail has seen a surge in population growth.

“Many young families are moving to Vail and the Jewish community is no exception,” noted Rabbi Sruly Shemtov.

His intention is that Chabad of Vail will be “an address for everything Jewish,” providing services to Jews of all backgrounds and levels of observance in the area.

Mega Challah Bake will be virtual again

Rabbi Sruly and Chavie Shemtov and their son Sholom

vision of Higher Learning of Associated Beth Rivkah School in Brooklyn, NY, she led educational programs and administrative work at Chabad of Oro Valley in Arizona and Chabad of the West Side in New York City.

Rabbi and Mrs. Shemtov, like all Chabad Shluchim, were inspired by the teachings of the Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson, of righteous memory. In a time when more people are searching for meaning and fulfillment in their lives, the Rebbe taught that the Torah is the blueprint for a meaningful life and that its relevance to every aspect of life continues in the modern era. To date, Chabad has 38 Rabbi and Rebbetzin teams in Arizona, 8 of which serving Southern Arizona.

Rabbi Yossie Shemtov says that his nephew and niece were a natural choice for the task. “Rabbi Sruly and Chavie have visited Southern Arizona multiple times and have become familiar with the culture and needs of the Jewish community,” he said. “Their motivation and commitment will guide them as they establish the first official Jewish presence in Vail. We wish them much success and look forward to working with them.”

As part of their outreach, they will be offering Shabbat dinners, personalized Torah study and holiday programming.

“My mom, step-dad, son and myself are so excited about a Jewish presence here in the Vail area,” said Carrie Adler-Wheeler, who lives in Vail.

“Last year, gathering virtually wasn’t our first choice,” admits Feigie Ceitlin, program director of Chabad Tucson. “But it ended up being a marvelous evening.

We had families and couples gathering together in the kitchen and baking challah and it was beautiful to see.”

This year’s online event will be on Thursday, September 2, from 7:00 to 9:00 PM. Early-bird tickets are available until midnight on August 22 at www.MegaChallahTucson. com

Among their first activities will be to organize services for the High Holidays, officiated by Rabbi Sruly. Rosh Hashana begins at sunset on Monday, September 6, 2021 and ends at nightfall on Wednesday, September 8, 2021. Yom Kippur begins at sunset on Wednesday, September 15 and ends at nightfall on Thursday, September 16.

“I am beyond excited to have a Jewish center in Vail,” said Sarah Kaplan, a resident of Vail. “I am Jewish and have been unable to expose my children to the traditions, beliefs, etc. and they are itching to know all about Judaism. We thank the Shemtovs for their time and for bringing a Jewish center to Vail. It’s about time!”

For more information on the Chabad Jewish Center of Vail, call 347-372-3092, email JewishVailArizona@gmail.com, or visit www.JewishVailAZ.com

Sharon Glassberg and her son Aaron Bukani join the Mega Challah Bake from their home in Tucson, last year

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PROFILE

Hey Jay

Jay Sherman has spent years crafting furniture and himself

By Rabbi Yossie Shemtov With a mane of silver hair on his head and a few more peeking out of his openbuttoned Hawaiin shirt, Jay Sherman is easily recognizable in Tucson. Since 1979, he has been the proprietor and chief designer of Off the Wall Furniture Solutions. Though his business has grown significantly over the years, he still visits private homes to customize hidden wall beds, built-in entertainment systems, cabinetry and furniture, to maximize space and versatility.

While Jay and his team of craftsmen spend their days working with precise measurements, he is the first one to tell you that his life has been nothing like that. I have known Jay, his sister Debbie and his daughter Sammy for years. Jay openly speaks about his struggles with alcoholism and his ongoing journey to sobriety.

His story is most fitting for the current Jewish month of Elul when we reflect on this past year and make resolutions for the new one. Elul is a time for teshuvah — repentance, or return to G-d. Jay reflects and resolves every day, one day at a time.

The following are excerpts from my conversation with him for publication.

Please note that neither of us are professionals in addiction and recovery and the following should not replace seeking professional guidance.

Question: How did you come to the conclusion that you were an alcoholic?

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Jay Sherman: In 1983, I was running my business, Off the Wall Furniture Solutions, and had come to believe that I was never going to get married, be a dad or a husband. I wasn’t going to have the life that I wanted — the one my father had.

I came to these insights as I spent my time sitting at the end of the bar every

Jay Sherman traveling with his daughter Sammy

night, drinking. Everybody knew me at the bar; they knew where I sat and would always say, ‘Hey Jay,’ but they didn’t know anything about Jay. They didn’t know where I lived, what I did, where I came from. They just knew my name and where I sat at the bar. I was very wellknown and very lonely. Alcoholism is a very lonely disease.

Every night I would sit at the bar and order beer, and the time came when I realized I no longer had the ability to not drink. My realization wasn’t the result of a DUI or major monetary problems or family problems. My external life was not affected by my beer drinking. Nothing was being affected except for my soul. I realized I was an addict.

At first, I didn’t even consider that I had to quit. When I went for help, and signed up for a 30-day rehab program, I went to learn how to control my beer

drinking — maybe one beer a night. It took every day of a thirty-day program to get me to understand that I could not control my drinking with willpower, or by cutting back. With my addiction, one beer would lead to two, to three, and so on.

Question: How did your family react when you told them you were going into rehab?

Sherman: When I decided to go into rehab, I called my parents in Tucson and said, ‘I’m driving over to see you; something is not right with me and I want to share with you.’ As I pulled up to their house, my mom came running out all crazy and hugging me. ‘What’s wrong with my boy?! What’s wrong with my boy?!’

I told them that I could not stop drinking beer and that I was going to rehab.

My mom was so happy. She feared I was

dying of cancer. But then she reflected, and said, ‘You can’t have a drinking problem. You are Jewish...’

My mom came and visited the rehab on a family day. Everyone spoke of their problems in the presence of their loved ones. But my mother interceded, “He’s never had any problems in his life. He’s going to learn how to cut back on beer like he wants to. He really can’t be an alcoholic. He’s Jewish…”

The room was silent and with that, the session ended. A week or two later my mom came back, having been given more information and gotten more insight. At that meeting, she told me she was proud I was facing my alcoholism. It was as difficult for her to admit my alcoholism as it was for me — but we both recognized that I had a disease, and needed to get well. The challenge has been that every day I have to stay well.

Question: Would you say that there is a difference in a person’s success if he decides to go into rehab on his own or if he is forced?

Sherman: I don’t know. For me, the main thing in determining my success was finding people who could help, because I could not help myself. I think that is true for most addicts. If you could help yourself you would have taken care of it by now.

In my case, I also needed a strong spiritual commitment. I believe in Hashem.

I believe that if I could not surrender my addiction to G-d I would not have been successful, and would have eventually relapsed. Willpower works very well for a while but it’s like a rock. It eventually erodes. It turns into sand.

I was helped by a man who had 20 years of sobriety and I thought he was the rock of the world. And then 20 years later he drank and died in a car accident.

No one is the rock of the world. It’s just a day at a time for all of us.

By the grace of Hashem, I have not had one relapse. But tomorrow I might. I say this in a healthy way. It keeps me focused on today. And today is a great day.

Question: G-d has given you unbelievable power to fight this addiction, hasn’t he?

Sherman: Unbelievable power? I’m not that powerful. In my 38 years of not relapsing, I have definitely contemplated drinking. I have thought about having a nice cold beer on a hot day. I think to myself ‘I deserve this.’ Then I realize that when I start thinking about having a beer is when I am not doing enough prayer in the morning before I go to work.

Some days my mental and spiritual wires get disconnected. Maybe on such a day I got a flat tire, or a customer wanted a refund, or whatever, and I think ‘This day sucks!’ When I reconnect to my spiritual self, I am able to remember that

Jay Sherman and his team of workers at the workshop of Off the Wall Furniture in Tucson. Photo: Michael Zaccaria

every day is a good day. Every day is a gift.

I want to use this opportunity to thank you Rabbi Shemtov. It helps more than I can say that you, Rabbi Ceitlin, and your families, have embraced me in a way that I have never been embraced anywhere else — and I am Reform and a member of another congregation. Your warm home is one of the most important components of maintaining my sobriety.

Question: When Jewish youngsters are checked into a rehabilitation center or program in Tucson, you are one of the people we pair them with to guide them forward. Are you aware of the impact you have?

Sherman: I have gotten cards from some of the people I have mentored. The cards say, ‘Thank you Jay for giving me back my husband. Thank you Jay for giving me back my father. Thank you, Jay.’ I didn’t give them back anything. But I have helped and given a mitzvah. I think

the most powerful mitzvah is when you do something without saying to yourself ‘I’m going to do a mitzvah.’ These cards that I get, give me a feeling that I made a difference in someone’s life.

Off The Wall Furniture Solutions 3636 E Fort Lowell Rd, Tucson, AZ 85716 Phone: 520-745-1186 Web: offthewallfurniture.com

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EDUCATION

Making Homework Work

By Nochum Kaplan

The word homework conjures up a variety of images, some of them good, some of them not so much. Many of us remember the frustration and the tears of struggling with an assignment we didn’t understand, but the lucky among us have memories of regularly coming home to cookies and milk and then sitting down quietly to do homework for an hour.

Regardless, our role as parents is to help the child get the most out of his or her assignment.

Today, however, for most of us as parents, the thought of homework, unfortunately, does not conjure up a scene of family bliss.

The times have definitely changed.

Let Sarah unwind when she comes home. Remember she has been under pressure all day. The time and place for homework should be regular and not vary from day to day. Make sure that the place and the atmosphere are conducive to study.

That doesn’t mean that the dining room is an inappropriate place. But it does mean that it should be cleared of the freshly baked “challah” and today’s mail. The baby should be kept away; now is not the time for Sarah to be babysitting, or even entertaining the little ones. In short, the room should be cleared of all distractions. Any music in the background should be conducive to study.

Sometime in the eighties when new math was all the rage, I received a call from an irate parent. She wanted to know what I was doing, as principal, to teach parents the new approach to math so that they could do homework with their children. There were calls from parents who were new to Hebrew studies; they did homework together with their children so they too could learn the language. And then, there were the calls with parents inquiring what “we” should be studying for the achievement tests which were coming up, or complaining that “We spent hours studying and we only got an 80% on the test.” Many of these parents are clearly not doing what’s best for their child; but what is the appropriate role of a parent when it comes to a child’s homework?

First, let’s all agree on a basic principle: it’s the kids’ homework!

Let’s remember that we are not in school, our children are. There are many good educational reasons for assigning homework.

Teaching the parents, or even keeping them abreast of what the children are learning, is not one of them. The role of the parent is to be the homework enabler; what we need to do is to facilitate the child’s discharge of his/her responsibility.

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If we want our children to become independent learners and ultimately enjoy the process of learning itself, then we have to let them take responsibility for their work.

Homework assignments may be guided practice for what was learned in the classroom, it may be independent study or research in advance of classroom learning, and the many variations on those themes.

Here are some suggestions: 1. Provide a conducive atmosphere and proper place for your child to work independently.

2. Answer questions in a way that helps the child think through the answer himself.

Most children will try to make things easier for themselves by involving a parent.

It may be an information-seeking question or tears which play for sympathy (they will long ago have learned which buttons to push). The parent’s role is to turn the situation around so that the child thinks things through himself. “Where can you look for the meaning of that word?” After a while, Josh will learn that asking a direct question of you is useless and stick to things like “does this sound okay?”

3. Encourage and praise the child frequently for the way she is doing the work.

The value of a parent’s approval and praise cannot be overrated. But praise must be honest, deserved and appropriate.

Praise the behaviors, not the child, by saying things like “Your handwriting is beautiful” and “Looking for that word in the dictionary was very resourceful.” Refrain from the generic “you are a smart kid.” If

Illustration photo by Cayusa

you want a child to be encouraged by the praise and not to see it simply as flattery, then he must feel he has earned it and that it is appropriate to the act being praised; superlatives are not believable.

4. If the child is frustrated or unable to do his work, tell him to leave it blank.

How will the teacher know your child is struggling and needs help if you do the work at home? The teacher assigns homework to either follow up on what the child has already learned or to help him prepare for

what he will be learning. If your child isn’t getting it, he will only fall further behind, unless the teacher finds out what the difficulty is and straightens it out. The teacher will only be upset if the child has not made an effort, not if he needs more information or guided practice. So...

5. Write a brief note to the teacher indicating the difficulty your child experienced.

Armed with this information the teacher will know which part of the lesson the

child has learned and which needs to be reviewed again. By refraining from doing your child’s homework for him and instead of informing the teacher of difficulties, you are enabling the teacher to work to resolve the problem.

6. No child should sit at a homework assignment beyond his ability to concentrate.

Depending upon the child’s age and attention span he should not be sitting beyond a limited, agreed-upon time. Even then, it’s always better to take a short break and come back than to sit for long stretches of time. If Yossi seems to be unable to complete his assignments in the expected time, discuss it with his teacher. He may give you some insight into the child’s work habits, shorten the assignment, or give Yossi a head start in school.

Finally, what skills do we want our children to learn as they do their homework?

We want them to learn personal responsibility.

When properly guided to do homework by themselves, children will learn that they are responsible for their schoolwork; it’s not their mother nor the teacher who has to do the work. Mindy will learn that when you are supposed to do something, you have to do it; no one else is responsible for your work.

We want a child to become self-confident.

When Becky completes an assignment and earns the approval of her parent and teacher, she develops confidence in her ability and will become less afraid to tackle work independently.

We want a child to develop personal independence.

A child who learns to do his own work will in time become an independent learner and will learn to enjoy the process. What more can we want?

—Rabbi Nochum Kaplan serves as the Director of the Merkos Office of Education.

This article was originally published on Chabad.org

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KOSHER

Apples, Honey — and Honey Wine Dale Pearson turned his wildlife reserve into a boutique and unique winery

By Rivkah Katz In the foothills of San Diego, a 63-acre wildlife reserve is home to the Pearson Brothers’ Winery. Dale Pearson, who runs the boutique winery, is a renaissance man of sorts. He is a military contract diver, inventor, and saxophone player.

His brother, Michael, serves as a flight rescue medic in addition to co-founding the winery.

Dale and his brother experimented with cultivating different wines for years.

“People think that wine is made from grapes, but there are many kinds of wines,” Dale stressed. With their mother as taste-tester, in 2010 the brothers began experimenting with honey, attempting to produce grapeless wine. It took appro-

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ximately three years, but the work was worthwhile. The brothers were awed by the outcome of their in-house honey wine— a hint of citrus with a smooth, dry vanilla finish. “When we hit the right honey blend, we knew we nailed it.”

Unlike grape-based wine, Saccharo wine, which is sugar-derived, can be manufactured in a natural environment.

Dale did not want to replace the wildlife on his acres for vineyards and was drawn by the benefits of producing Sacharro wine. The Saccaro wine is an eco-friendly and environmentally conscious product.

“All I need is a beehive with bees to extract nectar from the wildlife,” Dale explains. “This allows me to produce the wine anywhere; even in Central Park.”

“My attitude through the process was that either I do it well, or I don’t do it all.”

Dale’s results speak to the former. Dale and Michael started by replicating grape juice using GMO-free wildflower honey as a base, along with other natural ingredients like sugar cane, orange zest, and vanilla. The blend was then fermented with high-quality champagne, creating a non-perishable, 100% natural, handcrafted beverage. His wine has the nutritional value and flavor profile of grape wine, yet it is honey-based.

In 2015, the Pearson Brothers’ Winery received federal approval. After a trial run with a large wine distributor in 2017, Dale resumed his business as a boutique winery in 2019.

Another big step for the Pearson Brothers’ Winery came through a suggestion from a Jewish friend. “While talking business, he mentioned that my wine can be kosher. This was a great idea because my wine is a great addition to the apples and honey for the High Holidays. My Jewish friends could partake in my tastings, and I could sell my wine in Israel.

I felt like it opened new horizons for my business.”

Dale researched Kosher certification agencies until he came across OK Kosher. The Pearson Brothers’ Winery is now certified under the OK and is supervised by Rabbi Shlomo Klein, the OK’s West Coast Rabbinic Coordinator.

“This experience was unique,” recounts

Rabbi Klein. “It’s not every day that you see a wildlife reserve producing honeybased wine where production from beginning to end is done by the brothers.”

“I feel like I made my mark,” Dale reflects on his work. “I am touched by people who have supported my brainchild, noticing the uniqueness of my environment-friendly, handcrafted delicacy. I am thankful to call my winery Kosher which enables my product to cater to more people.”

As for Dale, he can just see it as a staple in Jewish homes. “Apples, honey, and Sacharro wine”.

Photo by Jacqueline Soffer

From a Kashrus standpoint, Saccharo wine does not require the scrupulousness of grape wine. In this regard, Saccharo wine is like any other beverage.

The ingredients need to be kosher, but gentiles can be involved in the process.

Additionally, although it’s an alcoholic beverage, Saccharo wine does not maintain grape-wine status for Kiddush on which the blessing of “Hagafen” is said.

To ensure no one errs with this, the label clearly states that its blessing is “Shehakol.”

Until Covid-19 hit, the winery was open for family visits and tastings. Dale looks forward to reopening his winery for visitors. In the meantime, the Pearson Brothers’ Wine is available for online purchasing.

From Feigie’s kitchen One-bowl classic honey cake

By Feigie Ceitlin Ingredients: 3 cups all-purpose flour 1 cup sugar 1.5 teaspoons baking powder 1.5 teaspoons baking soda 1 teaspoon cinnamon 1 teaspoon nutmeg 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1 cup quality honey 3/4 cup oil 1 cup of coffee 3 eggs

Instructions: Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

Dissolve coffee in water and set aside to chill.

In a large bowl, combine the remaining ingredients: flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, nutmeg, vanilla extract, honey, oil and eggs.

Mix well and then add the coffee and mix until fully combined.

Grease baking pan (9x13 baking pan or a bundt pan).

Bake for 40 minutes.

* The blessing: Baruch atah A-donay, Elo-keinu Melech Ha’Olam borei minei mezonot.

Blessed are you L-rd our G‑d, King of the Universe, Who creates various kinds of sustenance.

Enjoy!

— Feigie Ceitlin is the program director of Chabad Tucson. She will be hosting the annual Mega Challah Bake Tucson on Thursday, September 2, 7:00 PM over Zoom

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JUDAISM 101

Elul calling

The month that G-d feels close to us and we feel close to Him 1. Elul is the Final Month on the of Elul and finish 40 days later on Yom Kippur. Ashkenazi Jews begin saying Calendar Elul is the 12th month on the Jewish calendar. It always has 29 days, ending on the same day of the week that it be‑ gan (Sunday, Monday, Wednesday or Friday), which ensures that the holidays in the subsequent month will fall on the proper days.

2. It’s When “The King Is in the Field” As we approach the High Holidays (Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur), we prepare. In Chassidic tradition, it is said that during Elul, “the King (G‑d) is in the field,” smiling and accessible to all.

On the other hand, once the holidays are upon us, G‑d is in His palace, so to speak.

The experience during the holidays is that much more powerful and majestic, but now is the time when anyone can ap‑ proach G‑d with requests.

3. It’s a Time for Introspection After the Jewish people sinned with the Golden Calf, Moses spent this month (and the following 10 days until Yom Kippur) getting forgiveness from G-d, and obtaining a second set of tablets.

This time period is therefore an espe‑ cially potent time for us to come closer to G‑d. We have the opportunity to de‑ dicate time to cheshbon hanefesh (“soul accounting”), taking stock of our activi‑ ties, thoughts and conversations of the past year. We will hit the deck running when Rosh Hashanah comes, so this is the last breathing room we will have to think honestly and deeply and try for self-improvement.

4. We Say Selichot This Month

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Selichot (“Forgivenesses”) are special prayers said on fast days and during this season. The highlight of the Selichot is the recitation of the 13 Attributes of Mercy, the formula that G‑d gave Moses for securing divine forgiveness. Sephar‑ dic Jews begin at the start of the month

Selichot several days before Rosh Has‑ hanah (always on a Saturday night).

5. The Name Elul is Laden With Significance The month is first referred to as Elul in Nehemia 6:15, where we read that the wall around Jerusalem was completed on the 25th day of the month. (Fun fact: This is also the day when the creation of the world began, ending 6 days later on 1 Tishrei.)

The four Hebrew letters of Elul are an acronym for “I am for my beloved and my beloved is for me,” expressing the closeness that we experience with G‑d during this time. It is also an acronym for another phrase which ends with the words “...I will make for you [a place to which he shall flee].” The verse is refe‑ rring to the City of Refuge, where one who had inadvertently killed could find safety, and it encapsulates the refuge that G‑d provides us all when we seek to rectify our past misdeeds.

6. This Month’s Sign is Virgo Known in Hebrew as betulah, “mai‑ den” or “virgin,” this month’s horoscope sign is emblematic of the order of the day: coming close to G‑d. During this month, we are empowered to reach deep into ourselves and tap into that which is pure and G‑dly, unsullied by the crassness of our surroundings. This is typified by the betulah, who is untainted by sin.

7. We Hear the Shofar Every Day You may be surprised to learn that it’s not only on Rosh Hashanah that we blow the shofar. Every day of the month of Elul (besides for Shabbat and the day be‑ fore Rosh Hashanah), we blow the shofar after morning services. The soul-stirring shofar blasts inspire us to come closer to G‑d, as we read, “Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid?”

8. We Wish Each Other a Sweet Year

until Hoshanah Rabbah, the final day of Sukkot.

Words have power. When signing off letters or ending phone calls and conver‑ sations, we wish each other a “ketivah vachatimah tovah,” to be “written and sealed for good [in the Book of Life].”

The 21st-century iteration of this prac‑ tice would probably be to set this as your email signature, your WhatsApp status and your Facebook profile.

The Baal Shem Tov instituted the cus‑ tom of reciting three additional chapters of Psalms each day, from the 1st of Elul until Yom Kippur (on Yom Kippur the re‑ maining 36 chapters are recited, thereby completing the entire book of Psalms).

9. We Say Extra Psalms After morning and afternoon (or in some communities, evening) prayers, we recite Psalm 27, which begins with the words “To David: The L‑rd is my light and my salvation.” The Kabbalist Rabbi Binyamin Benish Cohen wrote in 1706 that one who recites this psalm in a sta‑ te of holiness, purity and great concen‑ tration will have his prayers answered, and that it has the power to nullify di‑ vine decrees. We continue this practice

10. Get Your Tefillin and Mezuzahs Checked Now Elul is a time to increase and impro‑ ve our mitzvah observance. Many people have the custom to have a scribe inspect their tefillin and mezuzahs during this month to ensure their kosher status. The Rebbe wrote that this practice is “wor‑ thwhile and very appropriate for everyo‑ ne to publicize.”

Not sure where to find a scribe? Email: info@ChabadTucson.com For more, visit www.chabad.org/elul

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HEALTH

We are the invisible caregivers

By Catherine Roozman Weigensberg Have you ever fantasized about being invisible . . . going about your day without being seen or noticed? Try being a caregiver.

Caregivers don’t make headlines; they perform their duties unnoticed, silently, imperceptibly and voiceless to most of society. They are the quiet, unassuming heroes. * A portly gentleman in his mid-sixties collapses into bed each evening, exhausted and spent. His wife by his side, they are attached wrist to wrist with a cord, in case she tries to walk out of the apartment in the middle of the night.

She suffers from early-onset dementia; she no longer recognizes the husband who devotes each day to looking after the woman he’s adored for over forty years.

And — oh yes, there’s also a bell hooked up to the door, just in case the cord system malfunctions.

Some time later, she is admitted to a nursing home. He visits her daily, until one day, not long afterward, his body succumbs to the years and stresses of caregiving. He dies suddenly of a heart attack. *

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A woman looking far older than her years makes her usual trek to her 93-year-old mother’s apartment. She takes her to her doctor’s appointments, checks up on her hygiene and eating habits. She reads the paper to her, and provides social stimulation, in order to help maintain her wellbeing. At first, no one notices when this mother of three, grandmother of four and widow of two years, absorbed in her thoughts about her duties that day, slips and falls on the ice not far from her mother’s building. Her first thoughts are: “If I’m hurt, who’ll take care of Mom?” Within minutes, someone notices that she is injured; she is rushed to the hospital and admitted for a broken hip. It’s the first time in years that she

Catherine Roozman-Weigenberg and her mother

will get attention and care for her own health. * There are millions of you juggling your responsibilities with both arms full while riding the unicycle of life, and praying that you have the strength to keep going.

We may not see you, for you are inconspicuous by day, wearing a cloak of invisibility, scurrying about your homes, taking care of your loved ones, getting them to their appointments on time, cooking meals, running errands, looking after a

busy household — and forgetting to look after yourself.

Yes, you’re invisible by day, maybe because you’re no longer out in the workforce earning wages.

At night, even if you’re fortunate enough to have someone tend to your loved one, you’re often too tired to go anywhere. Friends eventually give up trying to take you out, so you are left isolated, mentally and physically exhausted, frustrated and lonely.

I know you’re out there, because one of the things I used to do was run caregiver groups for people in the community who are walking, talking, living proof that you exist.

And now, I am a caregiver too. My dear mother has been living with us for a while now. My parenting/mothering skills, as well as my patience, are stretching far beyond what I thought I was capable of. I sleep poorly each night, because I’m constantly on the alert for any unusual sounds or problems coming from

her room. Each week, I witness another slight change in her physical or mental health. My mourning is an ongoing process; I grieve as I watch her slipping away from me, yet I also feel extremely blessed to be the one looking after her, for I know that no one on this earth could do it better, and she is safe.

I fully appreciate and understand the issues which affect you in your every day, full life. I’m one of the lucky ones. I have a husband and children who care about me. Nevertheless, I’m the one ultimately looking after my mother’s everyday needs, needs which are increasing day by day.

I often come across insensitive people who have no comprehension of what it is like to do this full-time. How do you explain to someone that a trip to the grocery store has now become an “exciting” event for me? A night out with my husband — well, I’m positively ecstatic.

We save the government tons of money by caregiving in our homes; yet when we ask for assistance with certain tasks, we are placed on a “waiting list” of a few months. A few months when it is assumed that we will continue to do a great job of tending to every possible need our loved ones may have. And we will do a great job, because most of us are devoted, caring, responsible people who understand that we must continue to provide the best possible environment for our loved ones, who face enormous health challenges and who count on us every single day. But sometimes, as exemplified by the scenarios described above, the cost of doing this unassisted is very high.

If you’re reading this and you are not a caregiver, but know of someone who could use a few minutes of your time, please help them. Here are a few suggestions. If you follow even one of them, it might make a significant difference in that person’s morale: * Offer to take him or her out for a cup

Photo by Matthias Zomer / Pexels

of coffee. If it is impossible for them to leave the house, then suggest coming there.

* Assist the caregiver in obtaining phone numbers for community services geared to meet their needs.

* Call as often as you can; let them know that you will provide an ear when they need to vent.

* If they give any indication of depression or suicidal thoughts, get them help immediately.

* If feasible, offer an hour or two of your time to “sit” with the care receiver while the caregiver goes out for a break.

* Please be patient and compassionate; caregivers desperately need understanding and gentle loving kindness, not lectures or criticism.

* Inquire if they’ve seen a physician for their own health lately.

Presents come in all packages. The one that G‑d wrapped up just for me will pro-

vide comfort and a sense of peace for the remainder of my days. And as I untie the ribbons and reveal the true beauty of this remarkable gift, I know that I will feel forever blessed.

— Catherine Roozman Weigensberg is a married mother of four and proud grandmother of two. She worked as a geriatric social worker before taking on the fulltime role of primary caregiver for her aged mother. This article was published on Chabad.org

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ESSAY

7 Life Lessons From My Pool Robot Cleaner

By Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin

As a child, I remember swimming in the sky-blue, sparkling-clean water of the Ben Weider community center in Montreal, Canada, where I was raised.

I took for granted that this was simply how pool water looked, all the time — until I moved to sunny, warm Tucson to serve as a Chabad rabbi here, and became the owner of a pool of my own. I quickly learned that without careful maintenance, those sparkling blue waters will turn slimy green with algae, and otherwise suffer from a chemical imbalance. I know now that just like everything in life, there is an effort behind the sparkle.

mes that unwanted obstacle can have the effect of propelling the robot to change its direction away from its ordinary course.

Obstacles or detours can actually be an opportunity to point you in the right direction.

6. One branch can stop everything

The robot can go for hours, but there are things that can stop it in its tracks.

For example, a thick branch jammed between the wheels or clogging the vacuum intake can bring this technological marvel to a helpless halt.

Most of the obstacles we face in life are twigs - inconveniences or small hardships that we can circumvent. But there are things that can halt us that are more like a thick branch. For example, the life of a person caught in the grasp of addiction might get stopped in its tracks. This leads me to the seventh lesson the pool robot taught me.

Recently, as I stood beside my pool, measuring the water’s pH and watching my robotic pool cleaner do its thing, it occurred to me that the robot’s purpose was much more complicated than simply moving around the pool in random patterns.

Chassidic teachings encourage us to learn from everything we encounter in life, so I’ve put together a list of seven life lessons my pool robot taught me one recent sunny afternoon.

1. Buildup is an avoidable problem

If you don’t carefully clean and maintain the water, calcium and mineral deposits will form on the tiles of the pool.

It’s not that you did something wrong; merely the absence of proactive improvement can lead to setbacks. The pool robot isn’t just cleaning - it is preventing a problem from occurring.

Over time, our experiences of all types —positive and negative— can build into our personality and behavior, occasionally leaving unwanted debris in our outlook. To remain true to ourselves, we need to regularly scrape off the buildup.

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2. Stay connected to the source

My trusty pool robot can do its thing

for hours on end without tiring, as long as it remains attached to the pool pump.

Sever the connection—even for a moment—and it will grind to a halt.

To maintain our spiritual vitality, we must stay plugged in to our source of power—our Creator.

3. Venture out of the comfort zone

I’ve noticed that the deep end of my pool tends to be cleaned the fastest. The reason is simple: heading downhill is the path of least resistance. So my little robot tends to spend more time at the lowest points of the pool than at its higher reaches.

As human beings, we tend to get mired down in what’s comfortable and familiar.

Getting stuck in the ruts of our own routines can be holding us back from exercising our full potential.

4. Elevation is temporary

The walls of the pool need cleaning too, and so the robot is designed to climb up those walls. But even with a powerful motor, at some point in its climb, the robot will lose momentum, stall and head back down towards the bottom.

It’s great when we’re inspired and when we climb to new heights. But inspiration tends to be fleeting and temporary.

To keep ourselves going in the grind of everyday life, we need to turn that inspiration into commitment, to keep us going when we slip back down from the heights.

5. Obstacles can lead to a new path

If the pool robot encounters a stray toy or object, it will turn and seek a new path.

Sure, I’d prefer if my kids cleaned up after themselves a bit better, but someti-

7. Intervention is sometimes needed

There is nothing the robot can do on its own to free itself from that thick branch.

It needs outside help. Only after it is taken out of the pool and the branch removed, can it go back to making its tracks through the pool, with the hope that it will not run into another obstruction.

Challenges that debilitate may require outside help - or intervention. Any one of us might need to reach out to someone else in order to be healed and be able to continue on life’s path. As the Talmud (Berachot 5b) states, “A prisoner cannot free himself.”

The wondrous thing about the pool robot is that when it moves, it is always moving forward. We should all be so lucky.

--Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin is the outreach director at Chabad Tucson

FUN PAGE

Take this quiz Education in the Talmud Quiz

By Menachem Posner - Chabad.org

A. When the early sage Rabbi Shimon ben Shetach returned to revive Torah life in the Holy Land of Israel, he instituted many major public laws. One of them was: 1. Education should begin for children at age five 2. Education must continue through age eighteen 3. All children should attend school 4. Study must include the Oral Torah B. The Talmud encourages which of these as the preferred method of teaching children the Hebrew Alphabet: 1. Repetition of each letter several times 2. Studying all the letters before getting to the vowels (nekudot) 3. Studying all 22 letters as one long statement that expresses the core values of Torah 4. Memorizing the numerical value of each letter C. While the study of Torah and especially Talmud is driven by discussions, questioning is discouraged when: 1. The questioner is not interested in the answer 2. The question may embarrass the teacher 3. The question may raise discord among the rabbis

4. The question expresses a heretical thought D. During a terrible drought, a prayer by a simple teacher was the one that helped bring rain. Which of the following describes what he did to deserve to have his prayer considered above others?

1. He did not charge students who could not afford to pay for their education 2. To discipline students instead of punishing them he motivated them with food and a good word 3. He treated students from poor homes as he did those who came from affluent homes 4. All of the above E. The Talmud interprets the verse (Daniel 12:3) “Those who lead the many to righteousness [matzdikei harabim] will be like the stars forever and ever,” as applying to: 1. Teachers of the young, because they bear responsibility for the future of their students for all eternity 2. Graduating students because they have the potential for star quality 3. Teachers of Talmudic academies because they lead the public to a life of righteousness 4. The funders who sustain the schools Answers: A3 (Jerusalem Talmud Ketubot 8:11) B3 (Shabbat 104a [according to one reading]) C2 (Taanit 9b) D4 (Taanit 24a) E1 (Bava Batra 8b)

The Talmud includes discussions and anecdotes underscoring the value that Judaism attaches to education, or chinuch, and the place of prominence it accords the teacher. Take this quiz to test your knowledge.

Reprinted with permission from the winter 2021 edition of Lubavitch International Magazine

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BH

Chabad Tucson presents

FROM YOUR KITCHEN A special evening baking challah and welcoming the new Jewish year.

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 2, 2021 7:00 PM ON ZOOM Join virtually and get a prepared box with ingredients.

Early bird tickets available by midnight Aug. 22 Register at www.MegaChallahTucson.com