blink
The door was open. I peeked in. It was dark. I heard voices; but in my head. I don’t remember entering the room but suddenly I was in. It was like I was teleported. I feel scared, I can’t feel my feet, I can’t see my camera. I blink. Then I close my eyes, and I wait. Maybe it’ll go away...I know I had a camera (but now it’s gone) and I know I didn’t go through the door. But how?... I open my eyes. Blink. I see people in a room, but they can’t see me, I see light, very bright. Am I dead? The noises aren’t coming from the room; I hear them inside; inside my head. I’m the link between what I see and what I hear.
Blink twice. I close my eyes again. The people are gone and I’m in another room again. How did I get here? Just a lonely chair is present in the room. But I can feel the presence of events perhaps past events. How is it possible to feel the past when I was not part of it? Reincarnation?
Blink. I’m moving again. With every blink I feel I move. Just like a time lapse. Stop. There’s music in my head, someone is crying. I’m halted again. I can’t move. I see a silhouette, there’s more light; now I can see. I see her. There’s drama in the face, but she doesn’t move, still I can hear her. It feels like her body and soul have come apart, and one has entered my head and the other has come to a complete standstill. The music gets louder. It’s Wagner’s Symphony in C Major – wait how do I know this?
I move again. The feeling is different this time; the motion has a gravitational vibe. I think I’m going down. I can feel it in my stomach.
Blink faster. Another voice just joined my head – but this time it sounds like a man. I can hear him. Why am I here? He asked. Why are you here? I replied. No response. He’s whispering now. I can’t understand. The sounds are getting softer…
Here comes the gravitational feeling again, the smell of the man’s sweat is fading. I’m sure I’m moving away.
I blink and peek. I can smell coffee, I’m moving, but refuse to stop again. I think I can control this… I see people again. Please, not again! They are chatting in my head. I don’t want to understand! I want to move! I move and I pass by them. I can smell, I can hear, however they are motionless. But I’m moving faster, I see them very close, I hear their whisper, I smell her perfume.
Blink. I close my eyes. I feel that I’m moving faster. Blink. I see an exit. I think I’m crying but I’m not sure. This is it! Is it? This isn’t real. I want to be in a state of actual existence. I refuse to dwell in this chaos.
Wait! I don’t hear voices anymore, I don’t smell things anymore. The white inside my darkness is becoming brighter. I see the door and it’s open. I can feel my camera strap around my neck again. I fear no more.
But I won’t blink again till I’m out.
blink by Joe Wabe