ION Arizona May 2010 #107

May 2010

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The Heat is On. Get Ready to Get Wet and Wild!

It’s never a dull moment here at ION Ari-

zona. As soon as Phoenix Pride weekend was over, we hit the ground running with plans for the wettest and wildest Splash Bash ever!

Phoenix Pride First, congratulations to the Phoenix Pride Committee and everyone who helped out to make this the biggest and best Phoenix Pride ever. ION Arizona is proud to be a part of it for the last eight years. And as Pride grows, our readership grows!

Coincidence? I don’t think so.

Splash Bash Wet ‘n’ Wild Before ION Arizona began in 2001, there was a “gay day” at a water park in Tempe. It was awesome. Everybody who attended had so much fun.

In 2002, we wanted to do something big to celebrate our first anniversary. We rented a hotel pool and had a pool party for about 75 people. For the next seven years, we had nine Spash Bashes, each one wilder than the one before. Attendance topped out at 1,000 with 160 hotel rooms sold one year.

For Splash Bash X, we had to do something BIG. I’m proud to announce that we’re bringing Gay Day back to a water park. It’s called the “1n10 Splash Bash Wet ‘n’ Wild Phoenix Gay Day 2010.”

That’s a mouthful of words - and fun!

We’re excited to partner with 1n10 to bring you the wettest, wildest Splash Bash EVER, and all proceeds benefit 1n10, supporting our GLBTQ youth. The day party is for the entire community and is open to the public from 10am-6pm.

Everybody - men, women, children and

everyone in between - is invited to come out and enjoy a day of fun in the sun. But when the sun goes down, the party heats up for Splash Bash X. We rented the park exclusively for our community. Coors Light, Smirnoff and Speedos - and even a few bikinis - come out to play. The huge wave pool and their biggest and best water rides are all ours. It’s going to be “amazeballs!”

Jessica and Hunter to Host What would a crazy pool party be without a couple of off-the-hook, outrageous hosts? ION Arizona interviewed these two brats in March and our readers couldn’t get enough. So we’re bringing Hollywood’s infamous weblebrities, red carpet bad-asses Jessica and Hunter to host the evening event and entertain you with their below-the-belt commentary, criticism, wit, wisdom (well, wait a minute ... I don’t know about that part) and vodka-soaked sarcasm. Check out their hysterical videos at www.IONAZ.com.

Sexy Swimsuit Spectacular For this issue, we brought our ten swimsuit models to Wet ‘n’ Wild to show off at the water park. It’s hot, hot, hot, hot - if I say so myself. And if they aren’t enough to convince you to come to Gay Day at Wet ‘n’ Wild, have fun and support a fantastic community non-profit organization like 1n10, I don’t know what will.

Enjoy this issue, and we will see you all at the 1n10 Splash Bash Wet ‘n’ Wild Gay Day. Jack M. Tesorero Publisher/Founder

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3819 North 3rd Street Ste. #10, Phoenix, AZ 85012

(602) 308-4662 • Fax (602) 271-0939 www.IONAZ.com

ionarizona@me.com

Publisher / FOUNDER Jack M. Tesorero - Ext. 5 ........... jacktesorero@me.com

FUN DIRECTOR Bill Knoop .............................................. (602) 301-8457 CREATIVE DIRECTOR Kevin Bushaw - Ext. 4 ..................... kbushaw@me.com Editor AND TYPIST Deon Brown - Ext. 3 .................. ionazeditor@me.com PRODUCTION ASSISTANT Craig Rubin ................................. ionarizona@me.com GRAPHIC DESIGNER Brock Miles ......................... ionazproduction@me.com PRODUCTION & Artwork SUBMISSIONS ionazproduction@me.com Advertising Sales Jorge Suarez, Ext 2 ..................... ionazsales@me.com Photographers:

Jerry O’Conner Carlos Silva

Don Thompson Michael Chesworth

National Advertising Representative Rivendell Media (212) 242-6863 ContributORS:

Wes Bergman Dusty Brinsmade Addison DeWitt Jackson David Kelly

Justin Gonzales Ted Kirby Kim Ruff Paul Sanchez

To Grow your business, call (602) 308-4662 ext 2 Published monthly by

© 2010 Tesorero Omni Media

a JMT Designs, Inc. company

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

PRINTED IN THE USA

All original artwork and photography for ION Arizona Magazine remain property of JMT Designs, Inc, and cannot be reproduced, altered, or sold without authorization and compensation. Limited usage rights can be purchased for a small fee.

NOTE: The views expressed in these articles do not necessarily reflect the views of ION Arizona, its staff, or that of its parent company.

Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization within ION Arizona is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons or organization. To our knowledge, all people photographed and published in ION Arizona are over the age of 18. Some photos were submitted by our readers. To our knowledge, they own the copyrights, and they have given us permission to reproduce them. If you see a picture that you own, please call us immediately and we will remove it from future publications.

All copy, text, display, photos, and illustrations in the ads are published with the understanding that the advertisers are fully authorized, have secured proper written consent for the use of names, pictures, and testimonials of any living person, and that ION Arizona is not responsible for unlawful use of such content.

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1995-2010: 15 Years of Design and Creative Excellence

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Cinco De Mayo

Screw the Governor and SB 1070! It’s the Cinco de Mayo! So hop on your burrito – as in “little donkey,” not the Mexican snack – and head over to BS West or Karamba for drink specials, and of course, a great big fiesta! Check out their ads on pages 8 and 10 for details or call your favorite bar to check on specials not posted in ION. No papers necessary, but it might be a good idea to bring your Driver’s License of legal ID in case they card you to get in. We’re just sayin’ ...

Night For Life: Casino Cabaret

RED is the night! Southwest Center for HIV/AIDS celebrates its 15 Annual Night for Life along with a Casino Cabaret on Saturday, May 8. It’s just like Las Vegas and Monte Carlo, all rolled into one! DJ Lucy Wrubel spins the turntable.

You spin the roulette wheel – all for a worthy cause. It all happens at the swanky Arizona Biltmore. For information and tickets visit www.swhiv.org.

Splash Bash X

Splash Bash is HERE! This one is going to be “Wetter ‘n’ Wilder”! ION Arizona magazine partnered with 1n10 to bring you Gay Day at Wet ‘n’ Wild Phoenix water park! The fun starts at 10 a.m. Saturday, May 22 and is open to all ages.

Then from 6 p.m.-11 p.m. the sun goes down and the party really heats up! The water park becomes a private party just for us with drinking, dancing, a wave pool, and the wildest water rides in the state! To purchase tickets check out www.

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Leathermen Memorial Military Weekend

Memorial Day Weekend ... public pools open, white pants and high heels are permitted, and last but most important, it’s a weekend of leather!

Celebrate this Memorial Day Weekend with The Leathermen for their Memorial Military Weekend!

Five nights, and five different bars give you the chance to come salute your favorite strippers! Catch ‘em at Cruisin’ 7, Velocity, Plazma, Velocity and Charlie’s. See the ad on page 18 for dates and times.

Memorial Weekend at Amsterdam

Kick off summer the right way! Amsterdam is throwing a weekend-long party! On Saturday they’ve got #3 Smirnoff cocktails, giveaways, cash prizes and contests, including Best Abs, Chest and Ass! Kiki Vermont Andrews stars. Next, start summer on Sunday with a Pool Party and margaritas by the pitcher! And best of all, no cover all weekend! 218 N. Central Ave.

May 2010 ION EVENTS LISTINGS DATE EVENT & LOCATION CITY Check out bar and nightclub ads in this issue for daily & weekly specials!

Mondays Big Gay Trivia at icepics Phoenix Wednesdays Game Night at The Rock Phoenix 5 Cinco de Mayo Everywhere!

8 Super Hero Party at BS West Scottsdale 8 Night for Life Casino Cabaret - AZ Biltmore Phoenix 8-9 Across the Galaxy Concert at Phx. College Phoenix 14-15 Get Lei’d at Dick’s Cabaret Phoenix 15 Miss Gay Valley of the Sun America at Babylon Phoenix 15-16 GLEE at the Dodge Theatre Phoenix 16 A Day at the Rock - Rummage Sale/Drag Bingo Phoenix 20 Art Show & Wine Tasting at BS West Scottsdale 22 Gay Day at Wet ‘n’ Wild Phoenix 23 AZ Entertainer of the Year at The Rock Phoenix 29 White Trash Party at BS West Scottsdale 29 Military Ball & Bi-Latin Men at Karamba Phoenix 29-30 Leathermen Military Memorial Weekend - various Phoenix 29-30 Memorial Day Weekend at Amsterdam Phoenix May 2010

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AZ Entertainer of The Year Pageant This is a big one, folks! It’s the Arizona Entertainer of the Year Pageant! It takes more than a great wig and a gorgeous gown.

See who’s got the moxie. Who’s got the talent. Who’s got what it takes to go on to the National Pageant? Come to The Rock on Sunday, May 23. The fabulous National Entertainer of the Year, Bianca Nicole will be there when Savannah Stevens steps down and a new queen is crowned. 4129 N. 7th Ave. Phone: 602248-8559 or visit www.therockdmphoenix.com

April 2010 ION DRAG LISTINGS DATE

TIME LOCATION SHOW / PERFORMER(S)

Mondays 7:00p Apollo’s Drag Race Viewing Party Wednesday 10:30 Cruisin’ 7th Judy’s Steppin’ Out Wednesdays 10:00p Charlie’s Claudia B. & Company Thursdays 10:30p Pumphouse II Hot Bodz Male Revue w/ Savannah Thursdays 9:30p Amsterdam Kiki Vermont Thursdays 10:30p Karamba Grecia’s Show Fridays 10:30p Cruisin’ 7th TGIF with Devina Ross Fridays 9:00p BS West Elements - followed by Mandy B.B.’s Boys!

Saturday May 15 6:00pm Babylon Miss Gay Valley of the Sun America Pageant Saturdays 10:30p Cruisin’ 7th Dream Girls with Regina Gazelle Saturdays 10:00p The Rock Diamond Dolls with Mya McKenzie Saturdays 10:00p icepics The Follies Comedy Drag Show Saturdays 10:00p Forbidden The Barbra Seville Show Saturdays 9:30p Charlie’s Pussy’s Patio Show Saturdays 10:30p Pumphouse II Hot Bodz Male Revue w/ Savannah Sunday May 11 9:30p The Rock The Biggest Drag Queen Sunday May 23 TBA The Rock AZ Entertainer of the Year Pageant Third Saturdays 1:00p Cruisin’ 7th Native American Revue 1st & 2rd Sundays 12:30p Cruisin’ 7th Sunday Morning Madness 3rd Sundays 8:00p Apollo’s Mia Adams’ That Time of The Month Sundays 8:30p Charlie’s Pussy LeHoot & Friends Sundays 10:30p Karamba Galilea’s Show To add your drag event, e-mail dates, times, locations & pics to kbushaw@me.com Included events must be 1) Charity Benefit OR 2) Located at an ION Arizona Advertiser

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AZ Highways Travel Show Can’t afford Paris, Rome or London for vacation this summer? Check out your own backyard! More than 100 exhibitors present guests with information about events, attractions, amenities and travel deals all over the state of Arizona. ION’s choice: The Motor Lodge in Prescott. Gay owned & operated. Visit www.themotorlodge.com for info. It’s fabulous! Travel show presented by Channel 3 at the Phoenix Convention Center, 100 N. 3rd St. Phone: 602-2626225. Maybe you’ll see Channel 3 morning show’s talking head Tara Hitchcock there!

Smucker’s Stars on Ice

Who doesn’t love watching someone perform a toe pick jump with a triple-toe loop, double salchow, a half-axel and a doublelutz? If you missed the Winter Olympics, now’s your chance!

Join Olympian champs Sasha Cohen, Belbin & Agosto, Todd Eldrige, Jeremy Abbot, Michael Weiss and more perform at the Jobing.com Arena on Tuesday, May 18 at 7 p.m. when they show you what makes them great athletes. 9400 W. Maryland Ave. www.starsonice.com or call 623-772-3200 for tix.

Phoenix Comicon Calling all Geeks and Dorks! Put on your Spock ears and brush up on your Runes! It’s time for the Phoenix Comicon! Anime, gaming, SciFi, Horror, and of course, comic books will be featured in addition to TV and movie stars from Star Trek: The Next Generation, Buffy, the Vampire Slayer and more! You can always learn about Madalorian Prop Creation, too! It all happens in the futuristic Phoenix Convention Center on May 27-30 at 100 N. 3rd St. or call 602-635-1711 ext. 02 for more info. Live long and prosper!

May 2010 ION around town listings DATE

1-2 1-2 8-9, 15-16 9 thru 9 18 22-23 27-30

ARTIST / EVENT LOCATION Maricopa Cty. Home & Landscape Show Taste of Greece - Tempe Beach Park Queen Creek Peach & Art Fest Mother’s Day - Your Mom’s House Desert Botanical Butterfly Garden Smucker’s Stars on Ice - Jobing.com Arena Arizona Highways Travel Show - Convention Center Phoenix Comicon - Convention Center

AZ State Fairgrounds Tempe Schnepf Farms Everywhere!

Phoenix Glendale Phoenix Phoenix

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GLEE The Goody-Two-Shoes kids from the “feel good” show of television comes to town with the cast of ABC’s runaway hit, “GLEE.” Come see Santana, Wheels, Gay kid, Asian, Other Asian, Aretha, Shaft and whatever else the rest of their names are performing all the fun music you know and love. Live at the Dodge Theatre May 15 & 16. Visit www.LiveNation.com or call 602-379-2888

Bamboozle Roadshow 2010 It’s an amazing line up ... Imagine Lolapalooza, Woodstock, Coachella, and your favorite concerts of all time rolled into one!

See Boys Like Girls, All Time Low, Good Charlotte, Great Big Planes, Forever the Sickest Kids, Cady Groves, Mercy Mercedes, The Ready Set, Vita Chambers, 3OH!3 and more at Cricket Wireless Pavilion on June 2. For tix call 602-2547200 or visit www.LiveNation.com or party. thebamboozle.com

Tim McGraw & Lady Antebellum

Faith Hill’s hot cowboy husband and country group Lady Antebellum come to the the Cricket Wireless Pavilion to sing their twangy songs about their broken down pick up trucks, losing the farm, cheating spouses and more. They’ll be here June 3 at the Cricket Wireless Pavilion at 2121 N. 83rd Ave. For tix call 602-254-7200 or visit www.LiveNation.com

May 2010 ION Concert Calendar DATE ARTIST / EVENT LOCATION

2 2 3 5 7 8-9 15 & 16 16 19 21 21 23 23 25 29 JUNE 2 3

Sugarland Cricket Wireless Pavilion 602-254-7200 Bone Thugs N Harmony Celebrity Theatre 602-267-1600 Coheed & Cambria Marquee Theatre 480-829-0707 Celtic Woman ASU Gammage 480-965-3434 Patti Labelle Celebrity Theatre 602-267-1600 Across the Galaxy - Phx Philharmonic Phoenix College n/a Glee Dodge Theatre 602-379-2888 30 Seconds to Mars Marquee Theatre 480-829-0707 James Taylor & Carole King Jobing.com Arena 623-772-3200 Styx, Foreigner & Kansas Dodge Theatre 602-379-2888 Brooks & Dunn Cricket Wireless Pavilion 602-254-7200 Minus the Bear Marquee Theatre 480-829-0707 Happy Together Tour Dodge Theatre 602-379-2888 Angels & Airwaves Marquee Theatre 480-829-0707 Crosby Stills & Nash Dodge Theatre 602-379-2888 Bamboozle Roadshow Tim McGraw & Lady Antebellum

Cricket Wireless Pavilion 602-254-7200 Cricket Wireless Pavilion 602-254-7200 May 2010

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by Jackson David Kelly davekjackson@cox.net

Yo, DJ! What’s New? Though May is shaping up to be an understated month for music with releases from Toni Braxton, The Deftones, Tosca, Kaskade and a new Cirque album, June will make up for any shortcomings with the tentative releases from Sarah McLachlan and Christina Aguilera. In the meantime, check out these four great finds!

Keane Night Train

One of my all time favorite bands is back with an eight track EP. Written during their most recent tour this release is a culmination of styles from their previous three albums. Opening track “Your Love” featuring rare vocals from Rice-Oxley is a mid-tempo ode to 80s synth pop done in a style that is simply gorgeous.

Then there’s the commercial “Stop for a Minute” featuring K’Naan and a foot stompin’ chorus and the dramatic, tango-like, yet experimental “Clear Skies.” However, those needing original Keane will find comfort in the almost perfect ballad “My Shadow,” this album sounds of what and who we fell in love with in “Hopes & Fears.”

Goldfrapp Head First

Those familiar with Goldfrapp and her way of changing the game will again be shaken up with this disco-infused collection that provides a relevant appeal of Olivia Newton-John. First single “Rocket” is a safe intro to what this album is about while the tracks “Believer” and “Dreaming” showcase what perfect pop tunes should sound like. In an almost Kylie like vibe, Goldfrapp flexes her vocals on

these two tracks all while giving you reason to tap your feet. The only real original “Felt Mountain” glimpse proves to be “Shiny and Warm,” this albums ode to her splash into the scene 10 years ago. By and far, this is 2010’s best album to date.

Glee

The Madonna EP

The cultural phenomenon of today joins forces with the musical juggernaut from the past three decades. Though many will argue the validity of a few of the seven tracks considering her vast catalogue, undoubtedly this undertaking proves smart for both camps. Included are the monster jams of “Express Yourself,” “Like a Prayer,” “Vogue” and “Like a Virgin;” while “What it Feels like for a Girl” and “4 Minutes” get new attention.

And all this on the heels of the mini Glee tour, including a stop in Phoenix this month. What a coincidence, eh?

Tracey Thorn

Love & the Opposite Most known as the lead for Everything but the Girl and their hit “Missing,” Tracey releases her follow up to “Out of the Woods” and flaunts the softer side of her impeccable voice. Thorn shines brightest on lead track “Oh the Divorces.” The haunting piano, moody chorus and its waltz-like beauty work perfectly together. And then there’s the bold “Swimming” with its pace-changing melody and an up and down musical style of genius.

Other tracks of note include this discs jam, “Why Does the Wind” and the safe, EBTGesque hints of “Kentish Town.”

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Photos by Yuri Arcurs and Don Thompson

Night For Life

Casino Cabaret 30 30

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Southwest Center for HIV/AIDS

celebrates their 15th Annual Night for Life Gala and Casino Cabaret at the Arizona Biltmore on Saturday, May 8th. After the gala, join in the fun at the Casino Cabaret after party at 9:00 p.m. featuring a hosted bar until 10:00 p.m. While you spin the roulette wheel the DJ will spin the music.

Purchase your tickets for the Gala and Casino Cabaret online at www. swhiv.org. If the black tie affair isn’t your interest, then simply purchase tickets for the Casino Cabaret After Party. Dress your best and you can bet on some fun! All proceeds benefit Southwest Center for HIV/ AIDS directly.

“There has never been an event like the Night for Life After Party. HIV/ AIDS increasingly affects more and more young Gay men, and it’s not only socially responsible, but powerful to contribute to the fight to end it.”

-Layton Steward

“Southwest Center for HIV/AIDS has been our focus for 15 years; we have received as much as we have given. We owe that success to our amazing friends and colleagues. We’re very proud of all who’ve helped shape this organization into what it is today. We honor all of you.”

-Honorary Co-Chairs Robert Black and Marc Reid May 2010

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Luck be a Lady Tonight!

All proceeds benefit Southwest Center for HIV/AIDS directly.

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Purchase tickets for the Gala and Casino Cabaret online at www. swhiv.org. Or, if the black tie affair isn’t your interest, then simply purchase tickets for the Casino Cabaret after party.

Dress your best and you can bet on some fun. For more information visit www.swhiv.org.

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Penn & Teller These zany, eccentric magicians offer a psychotic twist to their stage shows which has played Broadway, and toured the country to sold out houses. Join them on their weird, wacky and always entertaining journey through bizarre territory nobody else would touch. Catch them on May 7 in the bizarre city of Mesa at the Mesa Arts Center, 1 E. Main St. For tix call 480-644-6500 or visit www.

MesaArtsCenter.com for more info.

Always ... Patsy Cline Based on a true story about Cline’s friendship with a fan from Houston, Louise Seger, who befriended the star in a honky-tonk in 1961, Always ... is one of the most produced musicals in America.

Catch this touching, funny and delightful show about the legendary singing star at Phoenix Theatre, 100 E. McDowell. Phone: 602-2542151 or visit www.PhoenixTheatre.com

Close, but No Saguaro The brilliant comic actors of The Second City bring their scathing and riotous comedy to the Arizona Theatre Company where they’re performing a comedy revue all about Arizona! See them skewer Sheriff Joe, photo radar, Snow Birds and every howling coyote with a bandana wrapped around its neck. It all happens at the Herberger Theater Center thru May 16 . Visit www.AZtheatreCo. org for details and tix.

MAY 2010 ION THEATER + STANDUP DATE EVENT LOCATION

1 thru 2 7 7-7/11 thru 8 thru 8 thru 9 thru 15 thru 16 19-6/13 thru 22 23-5/30 27-7/3 27-7/6

An Evening with David Sedaris Jamie Kennedy Penn & Teller Agnes of God Richard III 12th Night of the Living Dead No Child The Play About the Baby Close, but no Saguaro Always, Patsy Cline Born Yesterday Phantom I Love a Piano Forever Plaid

Scotts. Ctr. for the Arts Tempe Improv Mesa Arts Center Desert Stages Theatre Mesa Arts Center Stray Cat Theatre Herberger Theatre Ctr. iTheatre at Herberger ATC at Herberger Theater Phoenix Theatre Hale Center Theatre AZ B’way Theatre B’way Palms Dinner Theatre Hale Center Theatre

PHONE

480-994-ARTS 4800-921-9877 480-644-6500 480-483-1664 480-641-7039 480-820-8022 602-253-6701 602-347-1071 602-254-2151 602-254-2151 480-497-1181 623-776-8400 480-325-6700 480-497-1181

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by Kimberly M. Ruff kimberlymruff@yahoo.com

Movie Previews Robin Hood

Starring: Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchett, Scott Grimes, William Hurt

Iron Man 2

Starring: Robert Downey, Jr., Gwyneth Paltrow, Don Cheadle, Mickey Rourke, Sam Rockwell Robert Downey, Jr. returns as Industrialist and master Engineer, Tony Stark. At the close of the first film Stark reveals that he is indeed Iron Man. As to be expected with superheroes, the U.S. Government and press are now putting the squeeze on the irascible Stark to divulge the technology behind his super suit. Stark balks, knowing all too well that secrets rarely remain that way. That’s just as well, because now he faces a whole new set of forces to be reckoned with, both the external threat of the Russian, Whiplash (Rourke, The Wrestler), and the internal threat of Justin Hammer (Rockwell, Choke).

Gwyneth Paltrow returns as Stark’s everfaithful assistant, Pepper Potts, but Don Cheadle steps in to replace Terrence Howard as Lt. Col. James Rhodes. The second part of a trilogy, Iron Man 2 is based on the Marvel Comic Book character of the same name and directed by Jon Favreau. Release Date: May 7, 2010.

This past decade Hollywood has become notorious for taking old stories and giving them a gritty reboot and Robin Hood is no exception. According to the trusty website Wikipedia, there are 49 different cinematic and television versions of Robin Hood swirling around in the mediated ether. Now, Ridley Scott (Gladiator) reunites with Russell Crowe to bring you the beefiest, edgiest incarnation of the elfin hero of Sherwood Forest in the disappointingly lamely-named Robin Hood. In a storyline not entirely unlike Gladiator, Robin Hood returns from fighting the Third Crusade to discover to his chagrin that feudal England is not benefiting the impoverished as much as he would like to believe.

Scrapping the green tights in favor of something far more masturbation-worthy, he forms a rock band called “Robin Hood and the Merry Men” and wages war on the Sheriff of Nottingham using nothing but the power of their rock! Robin Hood woos groupie, Maid Marian (Blanchett), and ushers in a new era of peace, love, and dope. [Note: this last paragraph isn’t true. But it bangs! - Ed.] Release Date: May 14, 2010

Tammie Brown

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by Wes Bergman wesobergman@yahoo.com

DVD Movie Review Hannah Free

Starring: Sharon Gless, Maureen Gallagher, Taylor Miller, Jacqui Jackson Sharon Gless, despite her heterosexuality, has always been a GLBT icon. Since her days as one half of the asskicking allfemale New York detective duo, Cagney and Lacey (1982–88), to her more recent stint as the well-meaning but overly-energetic Debbie Novotny on Queer as Folk, she has stood out as both a symbol and a supporter of feminism and GLBT rights. Now, with her turn as the title character in the film version of Claudia Allen’s play, Hannah Free, she plays a Lesbian, fulfilling the lifelong fantasy of lesbians across the nation. Hannah Free tells the story of the decades-long romance between the free-spirited, unashamed Hannah (Gless) and the more conservative, stay-at-home Rachel (Gallagher). Growing up in the same Midwestern town, Hannah and Rachel fell in love in their youth, but found themselves sometimes bitterly divided by marriage, war, and family pressure. Like all great romances, their love is so deep and profound, they always find their way back to one another. Primarily set towards the end of their love affair as both women find themselves confined to a nursing home, the narrative weaves a tapestry across placed and spaces that transcends all time. For any romantic that loves to have their heartstrings tugged by stories of undying devotion, this

Big Gay Musical

Starring: Daniel Robinson, Joey Dudding Based on the title alone, I expected Caspar Andreas and Fred M. Caruso’s film, Big Gay Musical, to be 2/3rds camp with 1/3rd song, but was pleasantly surprised when I discovered it transcended my pre-conceived notions and delivered something much, much lovelier.

Centered around an off-Broadway musical called Adam and Steve: The Way God Intended, the film blends the on-stage antics of the cast with the off-stage adventures of the two principal leads. In the same way that the musical itself is a quest for self-understanding and social acceptance, so are the journeys of Eddie (Dudding) and Paul (Robinson). Eddie comes from a highly religious family and has avoided coming out to his parents lest they reject him. Paul, on the other hand, is a relationship man but when his current partner cuts off ties on the basis of a false rumor, he decides the only recourse is to engage in meaningless flings. Rather than fully embrace themselves, Eddie and Paul use their fears about the acceptance and reciprocation of others as a justification to stunt their growth. A good moral to any story, Big Gay Musical shows that once you truly love yourself, others will follow suit. And if that’s not enough to get you off the couch and over to your local video store, the singing and dancing alone is worth the price of gas and rental.

film is just what the doctor ordered.

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Hula’s Modern Tiki

E komo mai means “Welcome” to Hula’s Modern Tiki Aloha Oe, big Kahunas and little Wahinis!

Looking for something accessible, but slightly exotic? You don’t have to go all the way to our island state of Hawaii to get a taste of the South Pacific. Why? It’s no secret that Hula’s Modern Tiki is riding a tsunami of popularity since it opened last September. Right here in Central Phoenix, little Ke Aloha, and you can get there wiki-wiki on the Metro Light Rail to this bar and grill in with the Chrysler star window on Central Avenue.

Although there is a variety of dishes and food to choose from, fish lovers will be delighted to know that the emphasis is on citizens of the sea. Try starting off with the Spicy Thai Fish Cakes at $7 for three fat ones. These babies are made from white fish, cilantro, chili, red onions, potato, fish sauce and ginger. These are highly recommended. No Humuhumukununukuapua’a on the menu.

That’s the state fish with the longest name ever. Say it five times fast.

chicken, tiny chunks of fried Spam – a Hawaiian staple – bleu cheese crumbles, pineapple, tomato, egg, daikon (a mild Japanese radish, a bit like jicama) and avocado ranch dressing. Tasty, although a bit more of the fried Spam and pineapple would be appreciated.

This is the mainland. Hula’s has offered a nice little nod to the Southwest and beach culture with their South Seas Fish Tacos where they serve up juicy, rich, tender chunks of grilled fish on corn tortillas, tomato pesto aioli, with black beans and rice. You’ll get two for $13.

The only thing missing from the menu to make it truly Hawaiian is poi, and the island’s ubiquitous macaroni salad and but they do have sides of fried Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam for Brunch. Really.

Another palate pleasing appetizer is the Island Style Poke, with generous, bitesize chunks of mild ahi tuna, soy sauce, sesame oil, fat slices of avocado, onions and macadamia nuts for $9.

Our friendly and knowledgeable waiter used the word “interesting” to describe Hula’s Island Cobb Salad. “Interesting” is a word that scares me. It’s loaded. Kind of like someone handing you .44 Magnum and inviting you to play Russian Roulette. You might luck out, or you might have your gastronomical brains blown out.

It’s chancey, at best.

Fortunately, Hula’s take on the traditional Cobb Salad is one where you luck out. It features roasted May 2010

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If you prefer your food on the hoof, you’ll be just as happy to know that they have several dishes from the bovine to the porcine with an island twist, such as the Teriyaki New York Steak, Bali Hai BBQ Ribs, Duke’s Luau Pork Plate, hamburgers and more. Prices hover around the $15 mark.

Faster than you can say, “Hey! How’d you like a nice Hawaiian punch?” you’ll become a fan of their fabled and oh-so-spirited signature lama pa’ipa’i – that’s “cocktails” in Hawaiian. Favorites include the Tiki Bastard with gin, bourbon, maraschino liqueur, lime and ginger brew. There’s also whoppers, like the Scorpion and Volcano Bowls. Tiki Time Happy Hour is 3:30-6 p.m. MondayFriday, with drink specials on Saturday and Sunday from 10 a.m.-7 p.m.

A late night menu is available Tuesday through Saturday for you night owls. You’ll be on the first outrigger back to Hula’s Modern Tiki faster than you can say “Mahalo nui loa.” BYOGS. Bring your own grass skirt.

Speaking of “Mahalo” ... be sure to join Hula’s for Mahalo Mondays, where 10% of the day’s proceeds benefit the SW Center for HIV/AIDS. But how do you say, “Snow” in Hawaiian?

You don’t.

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Hula’s Modern Tiki

700 N. Central Ave. 602-265-TIKI Hours: early ‘til late most always. Call.

Brunch: Sat & Sun 9:30 a.m.- 2:30 p.m. hulasmoderntiki.com

GAY-FRIENDLY RESTAURANT GUIDE

Acacia Cafe AZ 88 FEZ Hanny’s Hana Japanese Eatery Harley’s Bistro Mama Mia’s Mama Mia’s Marcellino Ristorante Mazie’s Mi Patio My Florist Cafe & Bar Pink Spot Switch Thai E-San Ticoz Z Pizza (Central Phx) Z Pizza (Downtown) Z Pizza (North Phx)

ADDRESS

TYPE

PHONE

3701 E. Indian School - Phx 7353 Scottsdale Mall - Scotts.

3815 N. Central Ave. - Phx 40 N. 1st Street - Phx 7th Ave. at Missouri 4221 N. 7th Ave. - Phx 3937 E. Indian School - Phx 806 E. Indian School - Phx 1301 E. Northern Ave - Phx 4750 N. Central Ave. - Phx 3347 7th Ave at Osborn - Phx 534 W. McDowell - Phx 49 W. Thomas Road - Phx 2603 N. Central Ave. 616 W. Indian School - Phx 5114 N. 7th St - Phx 53 W. Thomas Rd. - Phx 111 W. Monroe St - Phx 1367 N.Tatum Blvd - Phx

Cafe American Moroccan Fusion Contemporary Japanese Italian Pizza / Carryout Pizza / Carryout Auth Italian Cafe/Bistro Mexican American Ice Cream/Coffee Cont. American Thai Caribbean Fusion Pizza/Subs Pizza/Subs Pizza/Subs

602-956-0908 480-994-5576 602-287-8700 602-252-2285 602-973-1238 602-234-0333 602-508-0444 602-277-5512 602-216-0004 602-274-2828 602-277-4831 602-254-0333 602-265-3889 602-264-2295 602-297-8888 602-200-0160 602-234-3289 602-254-4145 602-765-0511

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Saguaro cup

Photos by Carlos Silva 44

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BREnt corrigan

Photos by Deon Brown www.IONAZ.com

May 2010 45

by Deon Brown

Don’t Be Jealous...

T

Tyra, Raven & JuJuBee

he competition was tighter than a pair of Spanks on Kirstie Alley at a Country Harvest Buffet on season two of LOGO’s juggernaut reality show, RuPaul’s Drag Race and sponsored by ABSOLUT Vodka, who likkered up the gals on the show’s Interior Illusions Lounge. ION Arizona enjoyed an intimate tête-à-tête with the three finalists: the seductive Raven, the ebullient Jujubee, and the winner, Tyra Sanchez. Each one paused between “tucks” to share their thoughts about the show, drag and cannibalism.

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ION: When the competition started, did you have any gut feeling who might win?

JuJuBee: It was Raven, Jessica, Tyra.

But I knew I would be there – if I played my cards right. It’s all about working really hard and listening. That’s what I think the whole, big challenge is of RuPaul’s Drag Race.

Tyra: I didn’t think about that. Of course, I wanted to be a finalist, but I didn’t think about anyone else. I always focused on myself.

Raven: I honestly thought Sonique, Jessica, JuJu and Tyra were gonna go far. I knew Morgan would do well but I didn’t know if she was gonna take it all the way to the end because I know how scatterbrained she can be at times, and I thought that could make her stumble. There were others that I definitely thought, ‘Okay, I don’t think she’s going to make it far,’ but we won’t talk about those.

in that this was a competition but I also knew that this was a TV show and people want to see drama.

Filming took us four weeks. The days are anywhere from about ten to twelve hours. Sometimes fourteen. The actual elimination day on the Main Stage is filmed in only one day and you’re standing up there for a good eight hours. So there’s going to be tension and tempers. We’re in pain. We’re tucked, and we’re in heels, our toes are squeezed into those pointy shoes. There’s going to be problems. And there’s so much you don’t see, that they don’t put out there.

ION: What was your favorite and worst challenge?

JuJuBee: You know, ironically enough it was the Drag Mother challenge even though I had to Lip Sync for My Life. I thought it was such a great experience getting to know somebody from a

ION: Were you happy with the editing?

JuJuBee: I have to say the editing didn’t change much about who I am.

So I’m very happy about how I was portrayed because it’s exactly who I am.

Tyra: I am. Because it showed all of my sides; they didn’t show just one side of me. Sometimes I can be bitchy, but other times I can be America’s Sweetheart.

Raven: Yes and no. When I went in for my interviews [the show’s “confessional” where they discuss the contestants and other issues - Ed.], I gave my first initial reaction then a little softer one, and they decided to use the more dramatic one.

And I’m fine with that. If people think of me as a bitch and that’s all they see of me, then I don’t mind. Now, I knew going

JuJuBee May 2010

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Mother’s Day is May 9th!

Order your flowers early!

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different era and learning so many things historically about Gay culture and Gay life. Worst challenge? I’ll say the Rock ‘n’ Roll challenge. We’ll just leave it at that. (laughs) Oh my god, it was excruciating.

Tyra: My favorite would have to have been the Diva Awards because we worked together as a group again for the opening. The worst for me was the episode with the Drag Mothers because I don’t do other people’s makeup which made it harder for me. Completely dressing them and doing their makeup and hair was kinda hard.

Raven: Oh, gosh! Honestly, I enjoyed most of them. I really got a kick out of making over 60-year-old men into drag moms. That one was fun. I loved the rock ‘n’ roll challenge with Terri Nunn because I absolutely adore her. But I’d say my favorite one was the Golden Girls one.

The one that I was upset with, and I wish I had a dollar for every time someone told me I should’ve won was the Wedding Dress challenge. That’s the one I honestly thought I had that one. In. The. Bag. And then I knew when all of the drama went down with Tatianna and Tyra I knew, ‘Stay out of this’ – because RuPaul was going to smear salt in all of our wounds when she says, ‘Tyra, you’re the winner of this challenge.’ And Tyra did a good job. I will say that. But I knew deep down that RuPaul had enough.

Tatianna was acting every bit just as much of a bitch as Tyra was by standing there trying to throw her under the bus. I think that’s what Tatianna was doing.

ION: What advice would give to anybody entering Drag Race?

JuJuBee: What I say is, “Be true to yourself; know your character, know your role and know what you’re gonna do.

Because if you go in blind you might as well close your eyes the whole time. And work your ass off. Be prepared to stand on heels. You’re gonna stand in heels for 15 hours.

Tyra: I would say be yourself and show personality. Show that you have lots of personality. The competition is to challenge you and open you up to new things. Still be you, but still try new things as long as part of you is in it.

Raven: Don’t do it! Just kidding! You need to make sure that you come prepared. I didn’t know how to sew. So when you see me sewing that’s for the first time in my life. So I would say, ‘Do your research, watch the previous season and get everything together that you can.’ And learn how to do your makeup properly.

That’s high definition TV. You’re gonna find Cover Girl does not cover a boy.

ION: If you could’ve kept a weapon on

ION: Some viewers have speculated that that scenario was staged, perhaps.

Raven: No. No. We had wrapped.

The cameras weren’t in there when the argument happened. I came in at the very tail end of it. Because it was caught on camera, people are thinking that it was, but it really happened.

May 2010

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the set, what would it have been and who would you have used it on?

JuJuBee: It would probably be a lasso. I probably would’ve got Mystique because she’s a little slow. But that’s my girl!

Tyra: Could it be duct tape? I’d use it on all the girls – to tape their mouth’s shut – then I would get the spotlight!

Raven: I would have brought shoes that could squirt grease from the back so that all those bitches would walk out on stage and fall. (laughs). Or Slimfast. And I would’ve used it on Mystique. That’s a good question. I’m not that way. I wouldn’t want to harm any of them. Honestly.

When it came down to it we all really did like each other. We really did. I told them, ‘When I go into my interview, I’m letting them have it. When they ask me for my opinion, I’m giving it to them.’ They’re like, ‘What have you said about me?’ and I told them. They acted a little offended and I said, ‘I know you have said things about me and that’s your opinion. When I go home at the end of the day I’m happy with me and that’s all that matters.’ There was no real hatred between any of us.

ION: Raven, Some people felt that you and Tatianna were really at odds.

Raven: Okay, yes. Yes, we were. I don’t hate her, by any means, but I kind of got this feeling from her that she is on her way to be a girl. And I say that because when I look at her, her drag just seems like a girl that wears dresses from Forever 21 and doesn’t mind wearing some wig that doesn’t really look like there’s much to it and she seemed like she just put on a little bit of makeup. Maybe it was intimidation. Maybe a little bit of me was, ‘Damn! This girl can just walk out here and get away with wearing a little, tiny purple skirt and a corset and they love it!’ and that was what started to irritate me. I don’t hate her by any means, but that sucks. It’s a drag contest and they’re looking at this – almost – tranny.

ION: If you were on a plane with the 50

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other queens and it crashed in the Andes, who would you cannibalize first and why?

haul, or if I’ve got a bunch of people that are just kind of here because, ‘Oh! You’re Raven!’ then they’re out the next minute.

JuJuBee: And I can only say one? Can I take a combo? We’ll just take different parts of everybody. ‘Cause I like it all! But I could only have one it would be Raven because she’s pretty. She’s like my sister.

ION: We ask all of our celebrities that question.

Tyra: That’s really hard. I’d definitely say Tatianna. Her legs are thick. She has thick thighs. And she looks like she’d taste good.

Raven: Mystique, because she has the most meat. (laughs) Okay. I would say Jessica Wild. I think she’d be real tasty. I bet she’d be real spicy, too. You saw her in those jeans! Those are some tender loins, honey!

ION: If you were a superhero, what would your superpowers be?

JuJuBee: Flight, because I’m always late. And flying would get me there a little faster. And I would look fierce flying, too.

Tyra: I think it would be the ability to fly. I’d want to see my hair and dress blowing in the wind.

Raven: The ability to see into the future. I would want to see into the future and I would want to see what what my life path has. I want to know exactly what’s going to happen for me, what I need to prepare for, and where my life and everyone in it is headed. And if the people who are with me, are in it for the long

Raven: You think I’m a celebrity?

ION: Yes. Don’t you feel like a celebrity?

JuJuBee: You know, it’s odd to me. I get families coming up to me – a mother, her husband, and, like, two children - the perfect American family – and they say they love the show, and they’re rooting for me and they’re excited and that they love what we do. These cookie cutter families watching RuPaul’s Drag Race!

Tyra: I do. But I didn’t feel like one until I went into a store and a girl started crying. She was shopping and said, ‘Oh my god, you’re Tyra Sanchez!’ and started boohoo crying.

Raven: Ummm ... a little ... I feel like it when I’m at Disneyland and I’ve got all these kids and their moms wanting to take pictures. But I still just feel like David.

LOGO has renewed RuPaul’s Drag Race for a third season and is sponsored

by ABSOLUT Vodka. Special thanks to the “can-do” fabulous talent of Aaron Brost of RoBro Marketing and Public Relations, www.ro-bro.com for making this interview possible.

Raven May 2010 www.IONAZ.com 51

Belbin & Agosto: Ice, Ice, Baby

Skating with Smucker’s Stars on Ice

by Dusty Brinsmade 52

www.IONAZ.com May 2010

The spectacular ice dancers, Tanith Belbin and her partner Ben Agosto are 2006 Olympic silver medalists, 2004-2008 Gold Medalists in the U.S. Figure Skating Champions and four-time World medalists, and 2004-2006 Four Continents champions.

They are ranked fourth in the world by the International Skating Union. Together, they organized and performed in their own figure skating show Skate Aid for Tsunami Relief in 2005, raising more than $37,000 for Red Cross relief efforts.

Interviewer Dusty Brinsmade, a winner of the 2010 Sexiest Bartender contest, and a local favorite, is a former professional, competitive ice skater in his own right. Dusty interviewed Belbin and Agosto for ION Arizona where they discussed the Winter Olympics, the sport, and their plans for the future.

ION: What do you remember most about being in the Olympic Winter Games?

TANITH: This time around, as opposed to Turino which is all a big blur, I will remember most is the team that we had because we were all so close; it was just a really great group of skaters. Everyone was so excited and humbled, respectful and happy to be there it made the whole opportunity just that much sweeter and being named as team captains was probably one of the most rewarding, memorable feelings that I’ve taken in and out of the Olympics.

BEN: I definitely agree with Tanith. That and the [Olympic] Village itself and the whole atmosphere of the greatest athletes in the world being in one place. A great opportunity to meet people from all different sports.

You get exposed to what their life is like and sometimes it’s so different than what we experience in the little tiny skating world we’re stuck in most of the time.

ION: How has being in the Olympics changed your life?

TANITH: The opportunities that have presented themselves when an Olympics are over with in terms of the media and possible career options has contributed a lot to my self-esteem and also my beliefs in more life after skating. It’s hard to foresee when we’re stuck in this bubble and coming to a point, by-and-large, where we’re at the end of our careers and we have a lot of anxiety about what’s next and what’s expected of us and how to get there. Having opportunities the post-Olympic season can really help with keeping calm about the future and not panicking.

ION: What opportunities have been presented?

TANITH: After 2006 I was offered a job doing correspondence for Good Morning America. It was my first insight into the world of broadcast journalism and something I’d never considered before, but found very natural. I thought that was a possible future career, and it’s given me a lot of energy and focus and excitement for the future.

B: I’m really excited about going to school now. (laughs) I feel like all of my friends have gotten degrees. I’m very interested in sports medicine. I’ve had injuries over the years and amazing doctors over the years who kind’ve helped put me back together.

I would love to help people, especially athletes who are trying to get back into the May 2010

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game and back on the field. Also, one of my dreams would be to do voice over work. I did a voice for a video game and it was the coolest experience. Having the opportunity to do character voices is so fun!

I love doing voices and impressions. I think that would be the greatest job ever!

ION: What has been the hardest obstacle has been for you?

TANITH: Keeping things in perspective and not going crazy. It’s really hard to stay balanced and remember who you are and not reach a point where you base your own self-value on how you’re doing on the ice. I think the biggest challenge is making sure you keep a solid separation between who you are, and who you are as a skater. I know that this experience has helped me get a grip on that, but there was a time when it was was hard to distinguish who I was if I wasn’t a skater. Thankfully I think I’ve been able to have that balance.

ION: What other athletes or celebrities have impacted your career?

TANITH: My role model in skating was Shae-Lynn Bourne [Canadian ice dancer partnered with Victor Kraatz - Ed.] I idolized her not just as a [ice] dancer, but as a person and as a skater. She was such a great role model for a young athlete, especially for women because she was so strong, dedicated and composed. I always wanted to present myself even half as poised and polite as she is and I would be okay. If I could have the same impact on someone someday that would mean a lot to me, too. She allowed me to see how important someone can be on an impressionable, young child’s life.

BEN: Probably Elizabeth and Jared Swallow [ice dancing team]. They were consistently such a good example about how to work hard and how to get along and how to get through issues. They’d have fights every now and then but it was always something they were able to work through and manage and still get back to working well together and I think that really influenced me on how you should behave toward your partner and your coach and your other teammates around you. That’s had a very significant impact on my skating career and my life.

ION: How would you like to see the sport change or grow?

TANITH: Ice dancing has gained a lot of credibility especially among the naysayers who used to make comments that it wasn’t athletic enough to be considered an Olympic sport. With the acrobatics and athleticism involved

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in performances today, I can’t imagine how anyone could dispute the difficulty. If the creativity that the skaters have put into the lifts is any indication of what ice dancing is capable of doing in terms of evolution in just four years, I can’t imagine what it will be capable of doing and turning into in another four years with another Games coming up.

Politically, to have two American Ice Dance teams standing on this past Olympic’s podium is amazing.

BEN: Ice dancing has really started to come into its own as far as gaining popularity and gaining acceptance as a real, athletic, difficult sport. Now it’ll be helpful as the sport and judging system grows for it to becoming a little bit easier for the public to understand.

People will become more familiar, watch it more, become more experienced with how the sport works and how the difficulty is intertwined with the performance. The more people understand what they’re looking at and how it’s judged, the more enjoyable it’ll be for them.

ION: Who makes your costumes? Does your mother still make them?

TANITH: She does, but not the ones I wore at the Olympics. We went to a costume designer in New York, Natella AbdulaevaDenze. She created costumes for theatre

for many years. Our coaches wanted us to go for a much more dramatic, theatrical design. We definitely achieved that although I know it doesn’t suit everyone’s taste because it wasn’t what they were used to seeing. It’s more edgy, artistically, than we’ve done. We felt more special and unique.

ION: If you were a superhero, what would your superhero, what would your superpowers be?

TANITH: Oh, man! I guess ideally I would fly. I travel so much; I’m so sick of airports and planes and people next to me on planes, I would fly. Teleportation!

BEN: This is a difficult question. I would love to be able to swim underwater indefinitely, like, with gills – like Aquaman. I scuba dive and I love the underwater world, and that feeling of being weightless and cruising around without all that gear that would be amazing to have that freedom.

Belbin and Agosto will be performing live with inspiring Smucker’s Stars on Ice Tour at the Jobing.com Arena on May 18, 2010.

Visit www.ticketmaster.com or call 800-7453000 for tickets. For more information about the tour, visit www.starsonice.com Dusty Brinsmade performs regularly at Switch and Forbidden. You can catch his act daily. And nightly, too. Don’t miss it!

“

May 2010

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MORE PICTURES AT IONA Z.COM

Phoenix PridE

Photos by Richard Bolinski May 2010 www.IONAZ.com 57

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Photography and Art by Brock Miles | Styling by Craig Rubin and Joey Sarandos Creative Director Kevin Bushaw | Special Thanks to Boom Boom LaRue’s, The Root Seller, Pistol Pete Swimwear, Matthew Lowney, Trevor Wilson and the whole Wet ‘n’ Wild Crew!

Alan, Leo from BS West & Jamaal lounge in the Wet ‘n’ Wild Cabanas Reserve yours today at ionaz.com 60

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Jojo from Amsterdam, Jacqulyn from Forbidden, Felipe & Casey, Chris and Brock from BS Hang in a cabana of their own.

May 2010

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Cal from Dick’s Cabaret, Chris from BS West, and Jamaal Enjoy the Wave Pool in suits from Pistol Pete, Boom Boom Larue’s & Buffalo Exchange May 2010

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Alan, Cal, Felipe and Casey in Swim Apparel from Ristefsky Macheda & Pistol Pete 64

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May 2010

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Jojo from Amsterdam & Jacqulyn from Forbidden Slide down the ride Serpentine!

May 2010

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ONLINE EXCLUSIVE! Rub-a-dub-dub, four men in a tub(e) Casey, Jamaal, Felipe, & Alan!

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ONLINE EXCLUSIVE! Casey floats down the Lazy River with Leo and Brock froom BS West May 2010

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Jamaal, Casey, Brock and Leo of BS West Enjoying the Wet ‘n’ Wild Wave Pool!

May 2010

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Vol. 4, Issue 2

APRIL 2010

OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS! Unfair and unbalanced. We decide.

ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL

Guv’s SB 1070 Threatens.

Canadians Scoot Back North

PHOENIX – Arizona’s bigoted immigration law targeted at aggressively cracking down on undocumented immigrants who are stealing lucrative jobs such as mowing lawns, washing dishes and selling funny tasting popsicles from little pushcarts from decent, law abiding tax paying white people who deserve and want those jobs.

Canucks are plenty worried. “The Governor’s coming to get us, eh,” said Wayne MacKenzie.

“I’m going back to Friendly Manitoba.

I plan on going over Niagara Falls the same way I came here: in a barrel, eh.”

OUTRAGEOUS!

Police, sheriff, and other law enforcement officials apparently have nothing better to do with their time than to investigate and rout out anyone who might be be Canadian. “If we spot anyone wearing a red maple leaf, watching hockey “I don’t want Arizona’s registered, or drinking Molson Beer they’re going to documented citizens with identification be investigated,” said one of the Governor’s toANY worry,” said Gov. Jan Brewer in an staffers.

“We’re going after the English, RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL interview. “This law is not directed at Australians and anybody who wears socks people of Hispanic or Latino heritage with flip-flops. That’s always a tell-tale sign who speak Spanish and clean our houses of a foreigner.” or do jobs nobody else would do. We’re not targeting people who still pump “This is America,” Governor Brewer said. dearly needed sales taxes into our state’s “Land of the free – with documentation empty wallets. We want all of the filthy – and home of the brave – with foreigners out of Arizona. And we’re documentation.” going after the Canadians, too.”

OUTRAGEOUS!

OUTRAGEOUS!

ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL www.IONAZ.com

May 2010

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OUTRAGEOUS! Björk to Host Volcano Aid Concert in Iceland

ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTA

OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS!

ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENT

EYJAFIALLAJOKULL, Iceland – Björk, “I am so happy to do and perform this the Grammy nominated international singing concert,” Björk said in a press conference star and high fashion model of swan dresses, punctuated with a series of multi-octave shrieks howls. “Here in Iceland, we are so has dedicated herself and her amazing – uh – vocalizations to a gigantic fundraising much apologizing for the exploding. And mostly to the English tourist who for many concert called Volcano Aid. This week long musical extravaganza will benefit those who days could not fly home and tend to their ANY RESEMBLANCE TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL dirtyIS catboxes and to eat their awful food.” suffered due of the calamity.TO THE TRUTH

OUTRAGEOUS!

Björk will perform in a specially constructed amphitheatre atop the icy glacier while a backdrop of car-sized chunks of magma and volcanic ash rain down all around her.

The recent eruption of the volcano shut down European airspace for days causing international airlines to lose thousands of dollars in revenue and delaying travel plans on a global scale.

Percy and Prunella Hastings, on holiday from Surrey, England were prevented from traveling home after the eruptions. “I say,” said Hastings, “We’re stuck here, thousands of miles from home without any scones.

Dreadful.”

OUTRAGEOUS!

The highlight of the benefit will be a duet featuring, both, Björk and Yoko Ono.

ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL May 2010 www.IONAZ.com 75

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SAGUARO CUP PARTY

Photos by Carlos Silva

www.IONAZ.com

May 2010

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IONPHOENIX 1.

1.

Amsterdam Amsterdam

718 N. Central Ave. - Downtown Phoenix

(602) 258-6122

2.

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Apollo’s Apollo’s

5749 N. 7th St. - Phoenix

(602) 277-9373

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Bar 1 Babylon Showclub

3708 E N.Van 16th St. - Phoenix 3613 Buren, Phoenix, AZ‎

(602) 306-1000‎ 266-9001 (602)

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BSBar West 1

7125 N. E. 5th Scottsdale 3702 16thAve. St. -- Phoenix

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2140 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix 4428 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix

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Charlie’s Cash Inn Cherry Bar Charlie’s Cherry Lounge Cherry Bar The Chute Men’s Club Cruisin’ 7th Clarendon Hotel

Dick’s Cabaret Club Vibe

727 W. Camelback Rd. - Phoenix (602) 265-0224 2140 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix (602) 244-9943 1028 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix (602) 277-7729 727 W. Camelback Rd. - Phoenix (602) 265-0224 Every Thursday starting January 11th - Mill Ave. in Tempe 1028 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix (602) 277-7729 1440 E Indian School Rd. - Phoenix (602) 234-1654 3702 N. 7th St. - Phoenix (602) 212-9888 401 W. Clarendon Ave. - Phoenix (602) CLARENDON 3432 E. Illini Rd. - Phoenix (602) 274-DICK 3031 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix (602) 224-9977 1517 S Black Canyon Hwy - Phoenix 3702 N. 7th St. - Phoenix

(602) 271-9011 (602) 212-9888

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Flex Private Men’s Club Cruisin’ 7th

Forbidden Dick’s Cabaret

6820 E. 5th Ave. - Scottsdale 3432 E. Illini Rd. - Phoenix

forbiddenaz.com (602) 274-DICK

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Harley’s The Door Bistro

1126 N. Scottsdale Rd. - Tempe

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icepics videobar Forbidden

3108 Rd. - Phoenix 6820 E. E. McDowell 5th Ave. - Scottsdale

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Incognito Homme

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(602) 955-9805 266-0875

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17.

Karamba icepics videobar

1724 3108 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 254-0231 267-8707

18.

18.

Incognito Kobalt

2424 N. E. Central ThomasAve. Rd. -- Phoenix Phoenix 3110

(602) 955-9805 264-5307

19.

19.

Karamba Nu Towne

1724 E E.Van McDowell Rd.Phoenix, - Phoenix 5002 Buren St, AZ‎

(602) 267-9959 254-0231 (602)

20.

20.

Kobalt OZ

3110 W. N. Central - Phoenix 1804 BethanyAve. Home Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 242-5114 264-5307 (602)

21.

21.

OZ Paradise Adult Boutique

1804 W. Bethany Home Rd. - Phoenix 130 W. Osborn Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 242-5114 (602) 266-5869

22.

22.

Plazma Plazma

1560 E. Osborn Rd. - Phoenix 1560 E. Osborn Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 266-0477 (602) 266-0477

23.

23.

Pumphouse II Pumphouse II

4132 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix 4132 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 275-3509 (602) 275-3509

24.

25.

24.

26.

25.

27.

26.

28.

Retro Bar Radisson Phoenix City Center The Rock Rainbow Cactus Roscoe’s The Rock Rainbow Cactus

Roscoe’s Velocity

3114 E. Cactus Rd. - Phoenix 3600 N. 2nd Ave. - Phoenix 4129 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix 15615 N. Cave Creek Rd. - Phoenix 4531 N. 7th St. - Phoenix 4129 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix 15615 N. Cave Creek Rd. - Phoenix 4531 N. 7th St. - Phoenix 2303 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 493-0355 (602) 604-4900 (602) 248-8559 (602) 867-2463 (602) 285-0833 (602) 248-8559 (602) 867-2463 (602) 285-0833 (602) 956-2885

27.

29.

Velocity Wild Card

2303 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix 801 N. Arizona Ave. - Chandler

(602) 956-2885 (480) 857-3088

28.

30.

Z Girl Club Z Girl Club

4301 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix 4301 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix

(602) 265-3233 (602) 265-3233

C

11.

11.

12.

12.

May 2010 www.IONAZ.com 81

IONBAR GUIDE SATURDAY

SUNDAY

Amsterdam

Amsterdam’s Signature Night Happy Hour 4-7pm

FRIDAY

Dance - No Cover! $3 Smirnoff cocktails until Mid.

Arts, Industry & ION VIP Night 1/2 price drinks *KARAOKE*

Apollo’s

Comedy Clips 6pm Karaoke 9pm

$1 Bud Light Drafts 2-8p Karaoke 9pm

$1 Bud Light Drafts 2-8p Male Strippers 10:30pm

Babylon

Friday 10pm - 2am Pandemonium with Pandora

Saturday Babylon Boys!

Dance party and contests

Sunday Sexy Salsa lessons

Bar 1

Friday Happy Hour 4-7p 10a-4p $1.75 well/ bud draft

Saturday $2 dom bottle 6-9p 10a-4p $1.75 well/ bud draft

Shirtless Sun $1.25 Bud drft 10a-4p $1.75 well/ bud draft

BS West

FUBAR with Elements 9:45p $5 you call it drink & $3 beers

2-4-1 everything all night Go-go dancers - A new tradition

Karaoke 9pm $1 Miller Lite drafts

Charlie’s

$3 pitchers/2-4-1 well/dom 2-7p $1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours

$3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 12-7p $1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours

Volleyball 4-7pm, NEW 3-4-1 $3 Long Islands, $3 pitchers

Cruisn’ 7th

Fridays $2.50 well & domestic 2-7pm

Saturday $2.50 well & domestic 2-7pm

Sundays $2.50 well & domestic 2-7pm

Dick’s Cabaret

2-4-1 VIP Dances 7pm ‘til 9pm

Off the Hook Tons of Prizes & Giveaways

2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances & VIP Wristbands

$3 Pomegranate Presses

$3 Bottle Beer & Tequila Shots

$3 Brunch Drinks 50% off bottles of wine

Forbidden

Crotch Rockitt

The Barbra Seville Show DJ Dancing

Sports Beer Bust Food specials Happy Hour

icepics

MEAT - Go Go Boys/Strippers $3 Wells, $4 Lng Isl., $2 Dom.

The Follies 10pm Great SKYY Drink Specials

Legendary Show Tunes Sunday $3 Wells/ $1.50 Drafts

The Leathermen

Velocity 10:30p - 1:30a

Cruisin’ 7th | Plazma 4:30p - 7:00p | 10:30p - 1:30p

Velocity 9:00p - 11:00p

Karamba

Fridays $4 Pitchers

Saturdays $4 Pitchers

Sundays with Galilea $3 pitchers

R Maizie’s

Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday

Happy Hour Brunch 9a-2p 3-6pm Everyday

Brunch All Day

R Mi Patio

Fridays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Saturdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Sundays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

R My Florist Cafe

Fridays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Saturdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Sundays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Nu Towne

Fridays 9pm Mike’s in the House Pool Tour.

Saturdays Hot Men Hot Music & $1.25 shot special

Sundays 2pm-2am Our Famous $1 Beer Bust/BBQ

Pumphouse II

Bottoms Up Fridays 2-4-1 all drinks

Hot Bodz Male Revue Hosted by Savannah

Sundays Happy Hour All Day!

The Rock

Karaoke @ 10 Poker @ 7 $5 Martinis 7pm-midnight

Diamond Dolls Mya McKenzie $4 Bomber/$3.50 3 Olive Drinks

Rock your Funday Sunday Tea dance, DJ, specials, food

R Roscoe’s*

All Star Grill Specials Great Happy Hour

All Star Grill Opens at 11am

$8 Sunday Brunch $8 Long Island Pitchers

R Switch

Fridays Open from 11am-Midnight

Saturday Open from 11am-Midnight

Sundays Open from 11am-Midnight

R Ticoz

Fridays Open from 11am-Midnight

Saturday $1 brunch drinks Open from 11am-Midnight

Sundays $1 brunch drinks Open from 11am-Midnight

Fridays Events TBA Outrageous Happy Hour 1-8pm

Saturday Events TBA Outrageous Happy Hour 1-8pm

Sundays Beer Bust 16oz. Bud & Bud Light Draft

R FEZ

Velocity

R 82

FULL MENU

* LIMITED MENU/TIMES

www.IONAZ.com May 2010

FREE PROJECT HARD HAT CONDOMS

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

Martinis & Manicures $5 Martinis

MONDAY

Arts, Industry & ION VIP Night 1/2 price drinks

College Night 1/2 price drinks with student ID

Divas Live! $3 Diva Shots during the show

All Day All Night 2 for 1 U Call-It Open-Close

‘Tini Tuesdays 2-4-1 Call Martinis Open-Close

Happy Hour 8am-8pm $2.75 well & dom.

Karaoke 9:30pm Happy Hour 8-8 $2.75 well/dom

Monday Martini Madness w/ the Babylon Boys!

Tuesday 8pm - 2am $5 U-Call-It, Babylon Boys!

Wednesday 8pm - 2am 2-4-1, Babylon Boys!

Thursday 8pm - 2am Babylon Boys!

Monday $1 Bud Lt. Drft 4-cl.

10a-4p $1.75 well/ bud draft

KAROKE $2.50 wel, dom 10a-4p $1.75 well/ bud draft

$1 OFF in your undies/leather 10a-4p $1.75 well/ bud draft

Thursday 2-4-1 U Call It 4p- cl 10a-4p $1.75 well/ bud draft

W.H.O.R.E. Service Industry $2 dom $3 well $4 bombers

Community Benefit/Fundraiser Book you event @ bswest.com

2-4-1 All Day and All Night A valley tradion!

Karaoke 9pm $2 drafts

Underwear Party 8-cl 1/2 price 2-8pm $3 pitch. 2-4-1 well/dom

2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-2 well/dom 8p-Close 2-4-1 cocktails/dom

2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 8p-close $3 Pinnacle

2-4-1 All Day! Cocktails and beer

Mondays 2-4-1 Well 7pm-9pm

Tuesdays 2-4-1 Well 7pm-9pm

Wednesdays 2-4-1 Well 7pm-9pm

Thursdays 2-4-1 Well 7pm-9pm

2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances, VIP Wristbands

Amateur Night Starts at 10pm

S.I.N. Bring Your Dancer ID and get VIP Pricing

Hot Studs All Night Long $5.00 Off with VIP Keychain

$3 Burgers $3 Margaritas

‘tini Tuesdays $3 Martinis

$20 Any Bottle of Wine and small plate

$3 G Spots

Closed Mondays Open Tuesday-Sunday 4p-2a

Happy Hour 3-7pm Karaoke w/ Brad 9pm

Happy Hour 3-7pm Showroom Trivia 7pm

Inferno Party 18+ Hotspot

Comedy Night 2-4-1 well / beer (8p-2a)

Mustache Ride First Tuesday 2-4-1 well / beer

Karaoke $4 martinis & Lng Isl. $3 Well/$2 Domestic Bottle

HOT ASS Best ass wins $100 2-4-1 well / beer (8p-2a) Cruisin’ 7th 10:30p - 12:30p

Charlie’s 10:00p- 1:00a

Thursdays with Susanna $2 drinks all night

Closed

Tejano Tuesdays $2 Drinks All Night

$3 Bistro Burgers $10.00 off of all Bottled Wines

Tuesday Night Fish & Chips Wednesday BBQ Short Ribs Selected Beers $3 Starts @ 5pm Selected Beers $3 Starts @ 5pm

Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday

Mondays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Tuesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Wednesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Thursdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Mondays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Tuesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Wednesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Thursdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Get Your Wood Here!

2x4 happy hour all day/night

Bust a Beer Nut $1 draft & $1 hot nuts

Wednesdays $3 well margaritas 9pm-2am

Singin in the shower w/ Mr. Karaoke 8pm-mid

Mondays 2-4-1 7-close

Tuesdays Dart tournament

Wednesdays 2-4-1 well & domestic

Hot Bodz Male Revue Hosted by Savannah

Lady’s Night Free pool $1 Miller Lite Drft, $4.50 Bomb.

Guys Night Out Happy hour all day long

Industry Night $2 Well & Domestic $3 Bombs

Poker Night $3.50 Long Islands $1 Off Draft Pitchers

Monday Pool Tournament

2 for Tuesdays 2-4-1 drinks all day

Wednesday All Day Happy Hour

Thursdays 2-4-1 7pm

Mondays Open from 11am-Midnight

Tuesdays Open from 11am-Midnight

Wednesdays Open from 11am-Midnight

Thursdays Open from 11am-Midnight

Mondays Open from 11am-Midnight

Tuesdays 11am-Midnight

Wednesdays 11am-Midnight

Thursdays 11am-Midnight

Mondays Underwear Night 8-2a Outrageous Happy Hour 1-8pm

Tuesdays $1 Bud Beer Bust 8-2 Wednesdays 2-4-1 8pm-2am Outrageous Happy Hour 1-8pm Outrageous Happy Hour 1-8pm

Wednesdays with Diamond $2 Drinks All Night

ION ARIZONA

Thurs Weekend Leather Launch $2.50 Domestic 8pm-2am

84

www.IONAZ.com May 2010

by Addison DeWitt

Chickenhawks everywhere loves super-yummy Brent Corrigan, everybody’s favorite twink XXX superstar, who pressed the flesh – that means “a handshake,” not what you’re thinking, despite his vocation, perverts – at Forbidden promoting the DVD release of The Big Gay Musical. Big shot Hollywood producer of the opus, eternal Valley Youth Project, Mich Lyons was on hand, along with the talented promoter Austin Head.

Even Curtis Steinhoff and Paul Rottas showed up for the event. Quel surpris!

Former Mayor of Tempe, Neil Giuliano presented young Corrigan with the Keys to ... to ... something.

And it wasn’t the city, I’m sure. I’m thinking of a room at a Motel 6. Kidding. Just kidding, folks! Probably a Ramada Inn. Kidding again!

And the lights go down when Miss Tammie Brown’s in town (pictured with Zachary Cheney). The quirk-o-licious star of the first season of RuPaul’s Drag Race brought her own unique brand of talent to Forbidden and Apollo’s where she performed to SRO crowds with Barbra Seville. An enraptured audience included Jeff Piñales and Mike Soucier of Acacia Café.

Word has it that Vintage Modern boutique’s vintage couture coordinator and stylist David Sheflin will be playing Pygmalion and assisting Miss Brown with choice pieces from his vast treasure trove of fine ladies’ accouterment and apparel. After her boffo

appearances at Forbidden and Apollo’s with Barbra Seville, impresario Sheflin will assist in bringing the unsinkable Tammie Brown back into town later this month. The two were seen hashing out details at Switch during brunch with a dozen other drag queens.

Speaking of Barbra Seville ... it’s official!

ArizonaDrag.com announced that our most valuable commodity is throwing her wig into the Interior Illusions Lounge to compete in the next season of RuPaul’s Drag Race.

Break a shapely leg, Babs!

Flash! A little bird told me that a certain bewigged beauty will be trading in her BeDazzled pageant gowns in for a black and white twopiece cotton/poly blend pant suit – with horizontal stripes, no less. And you know what that does to your figure. And your record.

Seems that after writing fraudulent checks for years all over the United States, she discovered exactly how long the long arm of the law is. And it’s really long. You can send her a cake with a file in it. Even if she can’t saw through the bars at least she’ll be able to do her nails while she’s in the pokey.

Our Party Penguin of the Month is Nancy Nuñez! She’s everywhere! Not only is she the Karaoke Mistress non pareil at The Rock every Monday and at Bar1 on Tuesdays, she singlehandedly coordinated setting up every stage at Phoenix Pride! Thanks, Nancy!

Share news, gossip, information and anything else you’d care to with Addison DeWitt at RumorHound @aol.com May 2010

www.IONAZ.com 85

Libra Sep. 23 - Oct. 22 Aries Mar. 21 - Apr. 20

You’ll meet an alluring stranger this month.

And they don’t come any stranger than this one. Follow your mother’s advice for once: never talk to strangers. In the long run it’s all for the best here. Honest.

Taurus Apr. 21 - May 20

The stars indicate that your birthday wish will come true this year. At least 50% of it.

You can’t have everything or else you’ll get spoiled. So is your wish half-granted, or halfdenied? Be optimistic!

Gemini May 21 - June 21

Celebrate your own, unique sense of your two selves. Your quirky, zany ways have endeared you to many. If it’s your birthday, the Twins in your personality will pull you in two different directions. Choose carefully!

Cancer June 22 - July 22

Your eyes say what your lips cannot speak.

So be careful what you’re saying. Or what you’re not saying. In the meantime, put on some lipstick and pucker up, buttercup! The truth is in your kiss.

Leo July 23 - Aug. 22

You have a few loose ends from last month that you need to tie up. Otherwise you might get tied up. And not in a fun way, sweetie.

With a little flattery and some help from a very friendly Scorpio you’ll have all your ducks in a row lickety-split.

Virgo Aug. 23 - Sep. 22

You’re like the McDonald’s of lovers: billions and billions served! Love is not on the value menu for you this month. Mind your manners and by next month a date with you will be like a filet mignon in a five-star restaurant.

86

www.IONAZ.com

May 2010

No more vampire movies or TV shows for you. Keep your sunny side up and quit wearing black. Your smile looks better in daylight than “Twilight.” But it doesn’t mean you can’t have a midnight snack once in a while.

Scorpio Oct. 23 - Nov.23

Did you get a new haircut? Are you wearing colored contacts? There’s something about you that’s different, but we can’t put our finger on it. A sexy Cancer might want to put his or her finger on it, though. Let ‘em.

Sagittarius Nov. 23 - Dec. 23

Someone is spying on you. Maybe it’s your roommate. Maybe it’s your mom. Or it could be the Russian Government. But if I’d were you, I’d travel incognito this month. Wear sunglasses and keep it on the D.L. By June it’ll be smooth sailing.

Capricorn Dec. 23 - Jan. 20

You are a pioneer in your own special way.

Everybody admires your fearless trailblazing and courage in the face of danger. But mostly the like the way you tell jokes and the way your dress. Keep it up!

Aquarius Jan. 21 - Feb. 19

Your sly observations about people are best kept to yourself, smartypants. If you must vent, maybe you better invest in a diary. Even then be judicious. Give five compliments a day and call me in the morning.

Pisces Feb. 20 - Mar. 20

You call it like you see it. And that’s not a bad thing. You’re genuine and a good advertisement for the human race. If you were bottled and sold, you’d be a millionaire. In the meantime, share the best of you with everyone.

For free. It’ll pay off later.

May 2010 www.IONAZ.com 87