Five Towns Jewish Home - 1-16-20

January 16, 2020

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JUST ANOTHER PROTEST OR THE BEGINNING OF A REVOLUTION?

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50 The “Whole Picture” at Yeshiva Darchei Torah Dinner

46

Bringing Fun Back into Your Marriage

Kehillas Ahavas Yisrael Celebrates Chanukas Habayis

61 YU High School’s Annual Dinner of Tribute PAGE 9

Passover Vacation Section Starts on page 91

How to Help Your Child Rise Above Life’s Challenges

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Dear Readers,

I

have to admit: although I like to follow the news, I don’t follow the tabloids. And so, I’m not privy to every rumor and speculation about what goes on behind palace doors across the pond.

Last week, though, when I first saw headlines about Prince Harry and his wife, Meghan, deciding to leave the royal family, I paid no attention to them.

After all, I don’t live in the England, and I don’t care who will be attending royal ceremonies on behalf of the Queen. But then this piece of news seemed to take over the news. It was every headline and everywhere – more than the breakthrough that came about with regards to Brexit, which, I believe, is way more significant than Megexit.

I began to pay a bit of attention as to what was going on, and I started to become uneasy. Something was rubbing me the wrong way. I couldn’t put a finger on it, and I’m still not entirely certain about what exactly is so distasteful to me about the situation.

Perhaps, though, what felt uncomfortable boiled down to one word: respect – or lack of it.

Regardless of what Queen Elizabeth II represents, she is 93 years old. At that age, she is deserving of respect – especially from her grandchildren. But instead, from what I’ve seen, there’s no deference from the younger generation towards the aging monarch – quite the opposite, in fact. It’s their way or the highway – no asking of advice or seeking permission or an acknowledgement that perhaps their grandmother should be informed or consulted with regards to what was going on.

A year ago, I remember when Meghan Markle created an uproar because she wouldn’t wear stockings to royal events. The Queen, it seems, expects the females in the royal family to do so. I couldn’t understand what Meghan’s problem was. Here she was, a foreigner, an interloper, and certainly not a royal, and she was deciding what protocol was go-

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ing to be. Forget the fact that it’s your husband’s grandmother’s expectations, she is also the Queen of England – and this is the way that things have been done for generations.

It’s this lack of respect and reverence for the older generation – and certainly what that generation represents – that I find objectionable.

In that same vein, I thought back just a few months ago to another whippersnapper who flouted society and social mores.

When Greta Thunberg, who has been coronated the environment’s savior by the left, stood up in front of scores of heads of state – all of them decades older than her – and lectured, “How dare you!” I was shocked. I was shocked first by the audacity of a young, entitled child to reprimand those who were older and wiser than her. But I was also shocked by the adults in the room. Where were her parents? If that was my child, I would have rushed the stage in embarrassment, apologizing for her tone and rhetoric. And what about those she was dressing down?

Did they not realize that a sixteen-year-old is not yet old enough to vote, to buy cigarettes and alcohol, and to drive? Why would they allow her to slap them in the face with her presumptuous tone and posturing?

Perhaps I’m from an older generation (although Meghan and I are the same age), or perhaps I was brought up with different values. In any case, it’s clear that there are those among us who don’t see that there is a need for respecting your elders or what they represent. As for me, I’m still going to ask my grandmother for advice, visit my older relatives, and require my children to respect those who have come before them.

After all, they weren’t born yesterday.

Wishing you a great week, Shoshana

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Shabbos Zemanim

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Contents LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

8

COMMUNITY 8

Readers’ Poll Community Happenings

44

Bringing Fun Back into Your Marriage by Susan Schwamm

82

NEWS

40

Global

12

National

34

Odd-but-True Stories

40

Just Another Protest or the Beginning of a Revolution?

78 ISRAEL Israel News

World Builders

26 76

JEWISH THOUGHT Rabbi Wein on the Parsha

68

Staying Strong by Rav Moshe Weinberger

70

Parsha in Four by Eytan Kobre

72

So Ordinary, Yet So Unique by Shmuel Reichman

74

PEOPLE Rescue off the Saudi Coast by Avi Heiligman

105

HEALTH & FITNESS What Exactly is Hate? by Dr. Deb Hirschhorn

89

More Than Just Weight Loss by Cindy Weinberger, MS RD CDN

90

“My Child Wants”

by Dr. Hylton I Lightman

92

How to Help Your Child Rise Above Life’s Challenges by Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW-R 96

110

Dear Editor, A reminder to the TJH Contributing Editor Wannabe: there only 10 types of people, those that understand binary and those that don’t.

Berel Elin Far Rockaway, NY Dear Editor, A great piece written by “Anonymous” this week about his “family” and their recent celebration. Great thought and great way of piecing it all together.

Yasher koach!

Adam Kreiger Dear Editor, On January 1, 2020, I sat at MetLife Stadium with my fellow sister and brothers in what I thought was brutal cold. In these worrisome times that we are living in, I was proud that we stood as one, proclaiming our unity and life-force without a semblance fear. I was proud to be a Jew. Moreover, I stood in those moments free from the feelings of angst or distress that seem to plague me on a daily basis. Yet on that day I felt encompassed by jovial (yet, chilly) bliss. Those were peaceful moments which I hope to embrace and incorporate into my daily life. Unfortunately, on a personal

level (and I feel many can share my woes) due to my nature, I am not one to easily recognize the positive moments and instead tend to focus on what is lacking. However, on that day it was actually hard not to recognize the opportunity for positivity and growth. What made that day different? Why was it so easy to feel this embrace and, yes, warmth.

I believe this is the power of unity. Unity has the power to cast aside the unconstructive or distressing emotions that sometimes shadow us in gloominess. In last week’s parsha, Parshas Vayechi, Yaakov calls his sons together. He uses two different lashonos to do so. The midrash explains that the redundancy is to make evident that there is a more profound message. Yaakov understood that the relationship amongst the brothers had been strained. Yaakov was imparting to his sons and all future generations: the power of unity and that it is a precious tool. Yaakov Avinu illuminated that when we cast aside our differences and stand together in peace, we can merit our dreams and miracles.

When we stand together unified, we are fortified and empowered to combat whatever may come our way.

Continued on page 10

FOOD & LEISURE The Aussie Gourmet: Salmon Quinoa Bowl 88

LIFESTYLES Dating Dialogue, Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW

84

How to Receive Feedback Like a Boss, Part II

by Rabbi Dr. Naphtali Hoff

104

Your Money

109

School Break by Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS

110

HUMOR Centerfold 56 POLITICAL CROSSFIRE Notable Quotes Trump Wins His Standoff With Iran by Marc A. Thiessen CLASSIFIEDS

98 102 106

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

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It took a while to shake off that cold, but I recovered. It is my wish that the love, harmony, and unity felt during that wonderful day shouldn’t fade, rather it should permeate each individual Jew and continue to inspire us all until the ultimate inspiration of redemption.

Ruthie Nades Dear Editor, For many schools it is midterm

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week. It is a time when students are feeling especially stressed under the pressures of succeeding in school.

As parents, it is easy to forget what it felt like to be teenagers with a week packed with cumulative exams. I want to shine a spotlight, on behalf of many, on a special administrator who took the time to write a meaningful email to the student body in a local school. In addition to the email, she made herself as available as possible to help students study for exams and

readily answered questions through email when her calendar was full.

The world needs more schools and administrators who look beyond test scores. I would like to publicly thank and share the email from Shulamith High School’s Assistant Principal, Mrs. Danyel Goldberg: Dear Students, As you take advantage of this Study Day to, well, study for finals I wanted to remind you of

something important.

Tests do not assess all of what makes each of you special and unique. The tests do not know if you can play an instrument, dance, sing, act, draw, or bake.

They do not know if you are a trustworthy friend or if you are a person who people look to to make them laugh. Tests do not know if you are athletic, creative, or goal-oriented. They do not test your willingness to help others by babysitting, cooking for Shabbos, helping with homework, or washing dishes.

Tests do not tell us if you are kind and considerate.

The scores give the school some academic data but they do not tell us everything.

There are many ways of being smart.

Wishing you a relaxing Shabbos, Mrs. Goldberg Thank you, A Reader Dear Editor, To the young woman who is watching her mother-in-law slowly take away her brother- and sister-in-law’s chances at finding the right shidduch, you have right to be concerned.

I have met a few older singles who have not yet been married and have lived with mothers who have been too “picky” or too involved for their own good. Yes, Hashem makes shidduchim, but hishtadlus is necessary.

When your mother-in-law behaves in an uncouth or irrational manner, she is representing your family to shadchanim or potential matches. Their first impressions of your brother-inlaw or sister-in-law are then marred by her bad behavior, and they think that the person in shidduchim has those same bad traits. Additionally, who wants to have a meddlesome, annoying mother-in-law that they have to put up with?

My suggestion is to speak gently to your brother-in-law and sister-inlaw. Perhaps it’s time they took on some of the responsibilities when it comes to their shidduchim. And, of course, if your husband can speak with your father-in-law, he may be able to rein in your mother-in-law.

Major hatzlacha – and good for you for seeing a potential problem and helping to avert disaster!

Aliza Fortner Cedarhurst, NY

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

The Week In News

British Parliament Approves Brexit Deal

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Britain took another step towards finally leaving the EU after the House of Commons approved a bill to leave the EU last Thursday.

The bill was approved by a wide margin of 330 to 231 and forces Britain to leave the EU by January 31. The legislation will now proceed to the House of the Lords on its way to becoming law.

While the House of the Lords can delay the bill from becoming law, it cannot scrap the legislation entirely.

The approval by the House of Commons means that Britain will almost definitely exit the EU before this month is over, making it the first-ever nation to leave the 27-member bloc.

“I have no doubt that their lordships will have heard the resounding message from the British people on the 12th of December,” said Brexit Secretary Stephen Barclay, referring to the recent election.

While the bill forces Britain to leave the EU, it allows an 11-month transition in which England will continue following EU rules and regulations while not being a member. The purpose of the interim period is to allow British businesses to get used to the UK’s newfound independence while still being allowed to trade with the broader European continent.

Conservative MPs exulted after the bill was approved, saying that the UK was finally on its way to leaving the EU’s clutches.

The bill’s passage is a major milestone and follows British Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s resounding victory last month in the polls. Unable to pass his own Brexit bill in Parliament,

Johnson declared a snap election and asked the public for a mandate to “get Brexit done.”

Johnson’s bet paid off, with his Conservative party winning its biggest majority in 70 years. The Tories’ overwhelming advantage in Parliament means that Brexit will finally occur – more than three years after the original vote to leave the EU.

Olympic Legend & Holocaust Survivor Turns 99

Agnes Keleti, a Holocaust survivor and an Olympic legend, turned 99 earlier this month.

Now the oldest living Olympic medalist, Keleti excelled as a gymnast and won ten gold medals during her career, including five golds. Her first success came when she won six medals in the 1952 Helsinki Games, followed by another four medals four years later in Melbourne.

Keleti is the oldest living Olympic champion and a Holocaust survivor.

She won 10 medals in gymnastics – including five golds – between the 1952 Helsinki Games and at the 1956 Melbourne Games.

Before her athletic prowess won her international acclaim, Keleti was a Holocaust survivor who survived Nazi extermination by pretending to be a non-Jew. Having grown up in Hungary’s Jewish community, she was 23 when the Nazis invaded in 1944. While she managed to escape the death camps by purchasing the identity papers of a Christian girl, her family wasn’t as lucky. While her mother and sister escaped the horrors, her father and all of her uncles were shipped to their death in Auschwitz.

Following the war, Keleti resumed training to be a gymnast and represented Hungary in a slew of international tournaments. After the Soviet Union invaded Hungary in 1956, Keleti emigrated to Israel and was joined later by her mother and sister.

Keleti went on to teach physical

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

FURNISH A KALLAH’S DREAMS

fitness in Tel Aviv University and Israel’s national sports center in Netanya for 34 years, as well as the country’s gymnastics team. Today, she splits her time between Israel’s coastal city of Herzliya Pituach and Budapest and does her hardest to forget her experiences in the Holocaust.

“The past? Let’s talk about the future,” Keleti told the AP when asked about what she went through. “That’s what should be beautiful. The past is past but there is still a future.

“It’s not the medals that are significant but the experiences that came with them,” Keleti added when talking about her athletic career. “I loved gymnastics because it was possible to travel for free.”

Iran Deals with Crash Aftermath

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At the home of Mrs. Tziporah Fruchthandler It was only on Saturday – three 973 East 18th Street days downing of a Ukrainian 7:30 pm - after Doorsthe open passenger plane over Iran that killed all 176 people onboard – that Iran admitted that its own Revolutionary Guard had shot down the plane.

On Tuesday, Iran’s judiciary said that arrests have been made over crash. The announcement came shortly after Iran’s president called for a special court to be set up to probe the downing last week of the plane by Iranian forces and amid an upswell of anger and protests by Iranians in recent days over the downing of the jetliner and attempts by senior officials to cover up the role of Tehran in the crash.

Judiciary spokesman Gholamhossein Esmaili was quoted by Iranian state media saying that “extensive investigations have taken place and some individuals are arrested.” He did not say how many individuals have been detained nor did he name them.

Iran’s President Hassan Rouhani said that “anyone who should be punished must be punished.”

He added, “For our people it is very important in this incident that anyone who was at fault or negligent at any level” face justice, he said in a

televised speech. “The judiciary must form a special court with high-ranking judge and dozens of experts… The whole world will be watching.”

Rouhani called the incident “a painful and unforgivable” mistake and promised that his administration would pursue the case “by all means.”

The plane, en route to the Ukrainian capital of Kyiv, was carrying 167 passengers and nine crew members from several countries, including 82 Iranians, 57 Canadians – including many Iranians with dual citizenship – and 11 Ukrainians, according to officials. There were several children among the passengers, including an infant. All perished in the crash.

Iran shot down the plane after carrying out a ballistic missile attack on two military bases housing U.S. troops in Iraq. No one was hurt in that attack, which was perpetrated to avenge the killing of Revolutionary Guard Gen. Qassem Soleimani in an American airstrike in Baghdad.

The shootdown and the lack of transparency around it has reignited anger in Iran at the country’s leadership. Online videos appeared to show security forces firing live ammunition and tear gas to disperse protests in the streets. On Tuesday, officials said that at least 30 people had been detained in the protests, although some had been released.

Iranian authorities had briefly arrested British Ambassador Rob Macaire on Saturday evening. He said he went to a candlelight vigil to pay his respects for the victims of the Ukrainian plane attack and left as soon as the chanting began and it turned into a protest. Iran’s Foreign Ministry summoned the British ambassador on Sunday to protest what it said was his presence at an illegal protest. Britain, in turn, summoned Iran’s ambassador on Monday “to convey our strong objections” over the weekend arrest.

Iraqi Intel Helped in Soleimani Killing The United States’ effort to track down and kill Iranian General Qassem Soleimani was reportedly aided by a network of Iraqi and Syria-based sources.

Soleimani was the longtime head of Iran’s Quds Force, a shadowy mil-

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

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itary unit working to spread Tehran’s influence throughout the world. He was killed on January 3 in a United States drone strike at Baghdad Airport.

According to a report by Reuters, U.S. intelligence managed to pinpoint Soleimani’s location due to intelligence it received from a network of spies it cultivated. Quoting two people familiar with the Iraqi after-action investigation, the report said that the sources provided a

steady stream of tips to the American agents, allowing the U.S. to zero in on the general’s location in real-time.

Iraq’s probe as to how the United States pinpointed Soleimani’s whereabouts is being led by National Security Advisor Falih al-Fayadh. Sources told Reuters that the investigation has already turned up “strong indications that a network of spies inside Baghdad Airport were involved in leaking sensitive security details” on Soleimani.

The human intelligence network included two police officers, two Cham Wings employees, and two Iraqis working at the airport. Cham Wings is a Syrian airline that was frequently used by Soleimani to jet around the Middle East, including the flight he took to Baghdad that ended with his liquidation.

“Initial findings of the Baghdad investigation team suggest that the first tip on Soleimani came from Damascus airport,” said an Iraqi offi-

The Chinese Ministry of Education announced last week that foreign teaching materials such as textbooks and novels are now banned throughout the public school system in the communist nation.

According to the guidelines, only materials which “insist on the guiding principles of Marxism and reflect the Chinese style” are permitted to be taught, and materials dealing with topics such as national sovereignty and religion will be written and distributed directly to schools.

The only exemption to this rule will apply to senior high schools offering joint classes in conjunction with foreign educational institutions.

“Our next step is to systematize the education of Chinese philosophy and accelerate the construction of teaching materials for the research on Marxist theories,” said a spokesman for the National Textbook Committee Office, explaining that the law

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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A massive sinkhole partially swallowed a bus in China this week

aims to consolidate the Communist Party’s influence over the education system.

The Ministry of Education’s move comes on the heels of China’s new “morality guidelines” for its citizens, published in October. Several weeks later, an updated “code of ethics” for journalists was disseminated as well.

China analyst Willy Lam, an adjunct professor at the Chinese University of Hong Kong, described the educational ban as “part of the country’s thought control apparatus.”

“The timing of the new ban has coincided with the open repudiation of Communist Party values by protesters in Hong Kong and Taiwan President Tsai Ing-wen ahead of the (Taiwanese) presidential election (on January 11),” he noted.

U.S. Blacklists Maduro Allies

The Trump administration blacklisted seven Venezuelan officials this week who were involved in a chaotic play for control of the legislature aimed at cementing President Nicolás Maduro’s hold on all levels of power.

The U.S. Treasury Department levied sanctions against seven law-

makers it said helped Maduro try to take control of the legislature away from its Washington-backed leader, Juan Guaidó, on January 5.

Monday’s action is meant to dissuade other government officials from aiding the country’s longtime ruler, whom Washington is trying to coerce with a comprehensive sanctions campaign into handing over power to Guaidó. The blacklisting freezes any assets the officials, including the group’s alleged leader, Luis Parra, might have in a U.S. jurisdiction. It also blocks them from traveling to the U.S. and prevents any U.S.-based entity from doing business with them.

Parra, in a statement, said punitive actions by Washington were hurting his efforts to overcome Venezuela’s political polarization in pursuit of national reconciliation. “It is unacceptable that foreign countries try to condition the behavior of our parliamentarians,” he said.

Guaidó and other opposition lawmakers who comprise the legislature’s majority were barred from entering the National Assembly on January 5 as Maduro’s allies in the body – along with new converts who had previously opposed the regime – chose Parra as the new president.

The act was an apparent move to strip legitimacy from Guaidó, who won the backing of the U.S. and nearly 60 other countries a year ago as Venezuela’s sole democratic leader. His recognition came as part of an international effort to isolate and unseat Maduro following a May 2018 re-election vote that was widely condemned as critically flawed and unfair.

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Maduro and his regime have endured escalating U.S. sanctions on the oil and gold industries, which the U.S. says the president and his allies are using for personal enrichment.

A New Sultan for Oman

Following the death last week of Oman’s Sultan Qaboos bin Said, on Monday Sultan Haitham bin Tariq Al Said was appointed as the country’s new ruler.

Qaboos was the Middle East’s longest-ruling monarch, having been in power for nearly fifty years until his death at 79 years old after a long battle with an undisclosed illness. He

had been involved in strengthening ties with Israel against their common enemy Iran. The first visit to Oman by an Israeli prime minister took place under his rule in 2018.

As Qaboos did not have any children or brothers, his numerous cousins were his closest relatives, with over 80 people as potential heirs to the throne. The newly-selected Haitham was educated at Oxford and previously served as Oman’s culture minister. He had also assisted with programs aimed at diversifying the country’s economy away from oil.

Amidst conflicts across the Middle East, Sultan Haitham promised in a televised address to continue his predecessor’s commitment to not interfere in the affairs of other countries while working for peace between them.

“We will continue to assist in resolving disputes peacefully,” he said.

Niger Mourns The Niger government has declared three days of national mourning after 89 soldiers were killed in an attack on a military base last week.

The attack took place last Thurs-

day when heavily armed militants attacked an army outpost in Chinagodrar in the country’s west, near the border of Mali. Just last month, a raid by jihadist militants on another military outpost in the same area left 71 dead.

lute in their support as the country continues to wage war against terrorism.

The government said its security forces killed 77 terrorists as they repelled the attackers who came on motorcycles and with several vehicles to the outpost near the Mali border.

This week, Niger’s flag was flown at half-staff throughout the territory as the country mourned the troops killed in the raid.

Meg-Exit Military troops in Niger and neighboring Mali are fighting to suppress a jihadist insurgency, which has seen army outposts in both countries attacked by militants in recent months. In November, 13 French soldiers were killed in a crash involving two helicopters during an operation against jihadist fighters in Mali. More than 50 soldiers died in a militant attack on a military camp in the northeast of Mali that same month.

Officials said they have launched an investigation into the recent incident and urged residents to be reso-

Prince Harry and his wife Meghan Markle shocked the royal family as well as much of the United Kingdom and the world last week by stating that they would “step back” from much of their official duties.

In an announcement on their In-

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stagram page and personal website on Wednesday, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex said that they would be “stepping back” from the royal family and would work to become “financially independent” as well as split their time between the UK and the United States.

“After many months of reflection and internal discussions, we have chosen to make a transition this year,” they wrote, adding that they hoped to “carve out a progressive new role within this institution.”

“We intend to step back as ‘senior’ members of the Royal Family and work to become financially independent while continuing to fully support Her Majesty The Queen,” they said.

The announcement shocked the royal family, which was not consulted nor told of the decision beforehand. Reportedly only informing the Queen and with the rest of the family finding out about the unprecedented decision from the media, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have plunged the royal family into a crisis.

Soon after the announcement, the British royal family put out a terse statement saying that they were “disappointed” by the decision.

Calling the situation “complicated,” Buckingham Palace maintained that the decision was not yet final.

“Discussions with The Duke and Duchess of Sussex are at an early stage,” read the Royal Communications statement. “We understand their desire to take a different approach, but these are complicated issues that will take time to work through.”

While the motivations of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex remains unknown, reports say that their decision was caused by a need for privacy from the British media.

Prince Harry has had a famously ugly relationship with English tabloids, blaming them last year for causing the death of his mother Princess Diana and decrying their “ruthless campaign” against his wife, Meghan Markle.

On Monday, after a royal summit was convened to determine the future of the royal couple, Queen Elizabeth II issued the following statement: “My family and I are entirely supportive of Harry and Meghan’s desire to create a new life as a young family,” the statement said. “Although we would have preferred them to remain full-time working Members of the Royal Family, we

respect and understand their wish to live a more independent life as a family while remaining a valued part of my family.”

She added that Harry and Meghan made it clear they don’t want to rely any longer on public funds in their new lives.

“It has therefore been agreed that there will be a period of transition in which the Sussexes will spend time in Canada and the U.K,” the statement said. “These are complex matters for my family to resolve, and there is some more work to be done, but I have asked for final decisions to be reached in the coming days.”

Harry, Prince William, and their father, Prince Charles, had met with the Queen to discuss a resolution to last week’s surprise announcement.

Meghan was in Canada with their 8-month-old baby Archie.

American Dies in Egyptian Prison

Mustafa Kassem, an American father of two who spent more than six years locked up in Egypt, died on Monday while still in custody, a reminder of how the U.S. struggles to balance its ties to repressive regimes with its stated commitments to human rights and its own citizens ― often with deadly consequences.

Kassem, who had been on a liquids-only hunger strike, was 54.

In 2018, Kassem wrote to President Trump to ask for help in securing his release. “I have seen you defend other Americans. I ask you, why not me?” Kassem wrote on September 12, 2018.

“For shame, Egypt,” Amy Hawthorne, the research director at the Project on Middle East Democracy and a former State Department official, wrote on Twitter after Kassem’s death.

Sen. Patrick Leahy (D-Vt.) called Kassem’s death as a prisoner “a monumental, unforgiveable travesty.”

Leahy, one of a handful of U.S. law-

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El-Sisi, who re-established military-dominated rule in Cairo after a brief democratic interlude run by Morsi, has subjected Egypt to its broadest wave of repression in the nation’s recent history.

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It is high time that the Congress, and the White House, recognize that we cannot continue to reward such reprehensible conduct.”

Egyptian authorities first arrested Kassem on August 14, 2013, when he was on his way home from exchanging money during a day of street protests.. His relatives maintained that he was not part of the

demonstrations and that he was treated especially poorly because he had his U.S. passport with him and was treated as a spy.

An Egyptian court sentenced Kassem, a New York resident, to 15 years in prison in a mass trial with 700 other people on September 8, 2018, for allegedly being part of a protest that President Abdel Fatteh el-Sisi’s government considered linked to terrorism. Kassem and his family consistently denied that he

was part of any wrongdoing.

Kassem had diabetes and had largely been on the liquid-only hunger strike since his conviction. Last summer, family members said he was becoming significantly weaker and expressed fear that he might die behind bars, pointing to the example of former Egyptian President Mohamed Morsi, who died during a courtroom appearance last June after years in detention.

Kassem stopped accepting liquids

On Saturday, Taiwan’s President Tsai Ing-wen won reelection by a landslide over her pro-China opponent, Han Kuo-yu.

Tsai, a 63-year-old former lawyer and academic, is mistrusted by China’s ruling Communist Party, which seeks to politically reunite Taiwan through whatever means necessary.

Taiwan is a self-governing island of 23 million people, which effectively split from the mainland in 1949 following China’s civil war. It boasts the world’s 21st biggest economy, and as an unofficial U.S. ally, may find itself in a crucial position amidst deteriorating relations between Beijing and Washington.

China has pushed harder for “political reunification” ever since Tsai first came to power in 2016, since her Democratic Progressive Party (DDP) refuses to acknowledge that Taiwan and the mainland belong to “One China,” as the rival Nationalist Party maintains.

“Today I want to once again remind the Beijing authorities that peace, parity, democracy and dialogue are the keys to stability,” Tsai said in her victory speech. “I want the Beijing authorities to know that democratic Taiwan and our democratically elected government will never concede to threats.”

Tsai added that Taiwan’s voters have “shown that when our sovereignty and democracy are threatened, the Taiwan people will shout our determination even more loudly.”

Over the course of her campaign, Tsai encountered a myriad of fake news stories and personal attacks, which claimed that an unmarried

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and childless woman couldn’t possibly care about the next generation.

Her administration believes that these stories stemmed from Beijing authorities, though Beijing denies this. Tsai is not married and does not have children.

Chinese President Xi Jinping has stated that political reunification, an idea opposed by around 80% of Taiwan citizens, is “the great trend of history.”

Malta Gets New PM

Attorney Robert Abela was sworn in as Malta’s new prime minister over the weekend following his surprise victory over challenger Chris Fearne in the Labour Party’s primary.

Abela replaces Joseph Muscat who resigned last year amid a scandal revolving around the killing of a journalist. Abela officially took power following a swearing-in ceremony at the Presidential Palace in Valletta.

Abela, 42, shocked Malta to beat the widely-favored Fearne in what observers called “one of the biggest political upsets in contemporary political history.” He will serve out the last two years of Muscat’s term.

Muscat had tendered his resignation in December following an investigation into the death of journalist Daphne Caruana Galizia. The reporter had been probing widespread corruption within the government before she was killed by a car bomb in October 2017. Three men were formally charged with her murder in July, all of whom pleaded not guilty during pre-trial proceedings. Caruana Galizia’s family, as well as other protestors, have accused Muscat of trying to shield members of his inner circle from the ongoing investigation “Robert Abela certainly has his work cut out for him,” Rebecca Vincent, the UK bureau director of the nonprofit Reporters Without Borders, noted. “Joseph Muscat leaves behind a legacy of a tarnished ad-

ministration and deeply flawed institutions. During his tenure, not only was the country’s most prominent journalist assassinated in broad daylight – so far, with impunity – but Malta’s broader press freedom climate experienced one of the world’s sharpest declines.”

Abela is the son of former President of Malta George Abela. Robert Abela was a football player when he was young and also practiced bodybuilding. He married his wife, Lydia, in 2008; she later became the secretary of the Labour Party executive committee.

Israel Releases 2 Syrian Prisoners

Israel announced last Thursday evening that it will release two Syrian prisoners as a goodwill gesture following the transfer of Zachary Baumel’s body.

Baumel had been missing in action ever since being killed in battle in 1982. His body was finally returned to Israel for burial in April following Russian intervention.

In a statement, the Prime Minister’s Office confirmed that it had decided to turn over the two prisoners “as a diplomatic gesture and a goodwill step, following the transfer of Zachary Baumel, of blessed memory, from Syria to Israel.” The government had voted to authorize the prisoner release last month but the decision was kept classified due to the sensitivity of the matter.

According to some Israeli media reports, Israel had let the pair go in order to win the release of Naama Issaschar, who was recently sentenced to a 7.5-year sentence in Russia after being caught with a small amount of narcotics when transiting Moscow.

Amal Abu Salah, the first of the

two prisoners, was set free on Friday morning. A 25-year-old resident of the Druze village of Majdal Shams in the Golan Heights, Salah was serving out a 7-year sentence for killing a wounded Syrian citizen in 2015. Salah had ambushed an ambulance carrying Syrian refugees to an Israeli hospital and beat one of them to death. The assault was revenge for an ISIS attack on the Syrian Druze village of Hader a day before. The sentence was Salah’s first in prison, and he was slated to be released in 2023.

The second prisoner released was Makath Sudki, who was in the fifth year of his 11-year sentence for a slew of serious security offenses, including treason and aggravated espionage. A Druze resident of Majdal Shams, Sudki is a veteran prisoner who previously served out a 27year sentence, also for treason.

In 2015, Sudki was arrested amid suspicions that he passed Syria intelligence on IDF troop movements and training exercises in the Golan Heights. He was sentenced two years later to a 14-year sentence and never denied nor renounced his past actions.

Speaking to the press on the Syrian border, Sudki hailed his newfound freedom as a defeat for the Jewish State. “This is a day of victory for me and the Syrian people, a victory over Israeli capriciousness and occupation,” he said.

The prisoner also boasted that his refusal to be deported to Syria eventually caused Israel to back down. Jerusalem had wanted the spy to be sent out of its borders but relented after Sudki said that he would rather remain behind bars than leave his hometown in the Golan Heights.

“I was released only according to the Syrian terms, and I didn’t agree to surrender to the dictates of Israel, which about a month ago offered me to go to Damascus,” said Sudki.

He added that he “looks forward to the liberation of all Syrians.”

The release of Abu Salah and Sudki was in addition to two other prisoners that Israel released following the return of Baumel’s body.

Last April, Israel set free drug dealer Zidane Twill along with convicted terrorist Hamis Ahmad. Twill was released a few months before his scheduled release date, while Ahmad was scheduled to be released only in 2023.

Baumel’s body had been returned to Russia last April, ending

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Let the Sar HaTorah, Maran Rav Chaim Kanievsky shlita, enrich YOUR Shabbos table

Comments, perspectives, and stories on the Weekly Parashah

SHEMOS

‫שמות‬

Compiled by Rabbi Shai Graucher Dedicated by the Rosedale and Wilheim Families

As we read through Rav Chaim Kanievsky on Chumash, we can almost hear the voice of this incomparable gadol b’Yisrael in his Torah insights, his guidance in all matters large and small, and, particularly, in his stories, warm and personal, of his illustrious family. Rabbi Shai Graucher, who is an almost-daily visitor to Rav Chaim, compiled the many Divrei Torah he heard from Rav Chaim and pored through his published works. He has also been privileged to hear many stories directly from Rav Chaim and his family and these, too, are included.

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New for the entire family. Bring the Parashah to LIFE! ַ‫ְּבׁש‬ Beshalach ‫ּלַח‬ rs Parashah Pointe

d by the Ananei HaKavo coffin, surrounded a pillar of Egypt, carrying Yosef’s pillar by day and The Jews leave by a cloud-shaped They are guided (Clouds of Glory). it the desert, so that fire by night.

Yisrael, through long way to Eretz the them Hashem takes to Egypt. them to go back back toward Egypt. would be hard for tells them to turn for two days, Hashem see travel Jews the Jews the When army.

After Jews with a large Hashem to chase after the assures them that Pharaoh decides they panic. Moshe coming at them Pharaoh’s army ns follow them. will save them. go in. The Egyptia sea and the Jews on the Moshe split the Hashem has come crashing down waters the the sea, are safely out of After the Jews g them.

Egyptian army, drownin to Hashem. a song of thanks the Egyptians The Jews sing gold, silver, and jewelry the and bodies, out the Egyptian beach.

The sea spits a fortune from the The Jews pick up Moshe that had taken with them.

They complain to the water is bitter. the to Marah, where of bitter wood into The Jews travel to throw a piece Hashem tells Moshe they need water. becomes sweet. the bitter water water. Miraculously, of the Torah’s laws. are taught some water. of At Marah they springs find date trees and Eilim, where they .They complain They travel to Sinn (Sinn Desert) arrive at Midbar ly food, called mahn leaving Egypt they A month after sends them heaven have no food. Hashem to Moshe that they to eat. sends them birds Shabbos, some (manna). He also would not fall on mahn the that the Jews were told Even though for it anyway.

Moshe. of them go to look They complain to there is no water. happens and water to Refidim, and again a rock. A miracle The Jews come his stick and hit take to Moshe Hashem tells of the rock. leads the battle comes pouring out reason. Yehoshua the Jews for no Hashem gives the Amalek attacks of win.

Jews nation The The

them.

Moshe prays for against them while the face of the earth. must be wiped off command that Amalek

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or NEWfefr Se s!

Shemo

HAH THE WEEKLY PARAS

T

Ja f he

fa F a m i l y Ed i ti on

THE

Weekly Parashah An illustrated retelling of the Chumash with Midrash

SEFER SHEMOS Looking around , Eliezer sees a neighbor who Egypt. He’s got had lost an arm both arms now. in There is his cousin been blinded by Shimon, who’d a cruel, Jew-ha ting Egyptian.

Before giving He’s not blind the Torah, Hashe anymore. m healed all the everyone could sick Jews, so see and hear what that He had to say, would be at Mattan and so that everyo Torah with health ne y bodies.

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‫ספר שמות‬

By RABBI NACHMAN ZAKON Illustrated by TOVA KATZ

THE WEEKLY PARAS

HAH

Also available: Sefer Bereishis In addition to telling over the parashah, The Weekly Parashah includes:

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 Questions Anyone?

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and 400 mm of rain accumulated during this period, with some measuring stations recording an unprecedented 450 mm (17.7 inches).

Such unusually large amounts of rainfall over a two-week period are unusual and only previously occurred in December 1951 and January 1969.

The downpour brought much-needed relief to the Sea of Galilee in Tiberias, with the lake rising by 23 centimeters to its current level of 2.3 meters from full capacity.

However, the rain also caused havoc throughout Israel, with coastal cities suffering from rampant flooding that caused millions in damages.

In Nahariya, the IDF was forced to intervene to rescue pedestrians in a mall after the Ga’aton River flooded its banks on Thursday.

The downpour also caused the death of 37-year-old Nahariya resident Moti Ben Shabbat, who drowned to death while trying to save people in a flooded car. In Tel Aviv, Stav Harari and Din Shoshani drowned in an elevator that was stuck underground during a flash flood.

Knesset to Debate Netanyahu Immunity

a 37-year search. Baumel, a yeshiva student enrolled in the IDF’s Hesder program, was killed in a clash with the Syrian military during the famous Battle of Sultan Yakoub. The battle saw an IDF tank battalion ambushed by a Syrian division in Lebanon’s Bekaa Valley and ended with 20 IDF soldiers killed and six missing.

Three of the soldiers were eventually located, while Baumel’s whereabouts remained unknown until early last year.

Israel Enjoys Record Rainfall The Jewish State continued to be battered by unprecedented rainfall last week, as the precipitation reaches levels not seen in over half a century.

According to data released by Israel’s Meteorological Service last week, preliminary analysis shows

that Israel received more rain over the past two weeks than it has gotten in 51 years. While rain fell everywhere in the country, it was particularly heavy in the northern Galilee and the Golan Heights region with more than 400 mm (15.7 inches) of precipitation.

Since December 25, the country has been battered by torrential rainfall that resulted in widespread flooding and at least 7 deaths. In the northern coastal area, between 350

Following a heated debate that lasted hours, the Knesset Arrangements Committee voted to establish

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the parliamentary committee that will debate granting Prime Minister Netanyahu immunity.

During the debate, a slew of rightwing MKs verbally jousted with Blue and White lawmakers, arguing that the hearing was illegal and speaking of a “coup.” The offending lawmakers were summarily thrown out of the committee, leading Likud MK Micki Zohar to boycott the debate together with his fellow Likud members.

“Today, 61 MKs have hijacked the Knesset during the election recess. You do as you please with the majority of the Knesset that has lost public trust,” fumed Zohar. “We will not take part in any debate or any vote. We are giving you the keys to the Knesset.”

Following the 15-1 vote, the Knesset will now form a committee that will debate whether to grant Netanyahu immunity. The vote was made possible after Knesset legal advisor Eyal Yinon determined that it was feasible to convene Knesset committees despite it being an election period.

Yinon also ruled that Knesset Speaker MK Yuli Edelstein was not

allowed to delay the Netanyahu hearing until after the March elections in order to win Netanyahu a more favorable electoral makeup.

The legal opinion infuriated the Likud, with Netanyahu noting that he had ruled the exact opposite as late as a month ago.

Yinon’s wife also serves as a prosecutor on the Netanyahu corruption cases, and the jurist had signed a document barring him from ruling on anything connected to the prime minister. Likud lawmakers, as well as Netanyahu himself, had argued in recent days that Yinon’s ruling was flagrantly illegal and constituted a conflict of interest.

Bibi had formally requested earlier this month that the Knesset grant him immunity in order to shield himself from being brought to justice on multiple corruption charges. During a primetime press conference, Netanyahu justified the request on what he alleged was a “wide ranging plot” by the police and the State Prosecutor’s Office to frame him for crimes that he didn’t commit.

Advances in Missile Defense

Israel recently announced the advent of a revolutionary technological breakthrough allowing it to use a high-powered laser to shoot down missiles while they are still over enemy territory.

While details of the breakthrough remain classified, the IDF claims that the new technology will bring about a strategic change in Israel’s air defense capability. While the revolutionary invention would complement the Iron Dome and David’s Sling systems, its main draw is the low cost of each interception.

According to officials, the laser-based system is designed to be effective against mortars, shortrange missiles, and drones. At only

$1 an interception, it would also be significantly cheaper than the expensive interceptors used by Iron Dome that cost upwards of $100,000 each. Additionally, unlike the stationary Iron Dome batteries, the laser-based system is mounted on trucks, potentially enabling it to accompany troops into battle and protect them from anti-tank missiles. However, a major drawback of the system is that it is ineffective in times of heavy cloud cover and other inclement weather, potentially limiting its use.

While laser-based air defense already exists, notably the U.S.-developed Nautilus, Defense Ministry officials say that no anti-aircraft system has reached such a high level of accuracy. Israeli scientists have been researching such technology for years but put its development as a national priority after then-Defense Minister Avigdor Liberman ordered it fast-tracked in 2018.

“The Israeli brain continues to lead with breakthrough innovation.

The laser project will make the defense establishment deadlier, more powerful, and more advanced,” said Defense Minister Naftali Ben-

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Meretz and Labor Merge

nett. “In addition to our existing war tools, we will add a laser sword against the threats, in the north and in the south.”

In announcing the project, the commander of the Defense Ministry’s Weapons Development and Technology Infrastructure Administration (MAFAT) cited the increased missile threat to Israel’s vulnerable civilian front as the impetus for developing the new laser beam. According to intelligence estimates,

Hezbollah in Lebanon possesses more than 150,000 rockets of various ranges and desires the devastation of Israel’s home front in the next round of hostilities.

Hamas and the Islamic Jihad in Gaza also have upwards of 40,000 rockets each, while Iran recently unveiled significantly improved cruise missile capabilities in an attack on Saudi Arabian oil refineries. With the missile threat on Israel worsening as time goes on, it has become

an imperative for the defense establishment to find a cheap yet effective solution.

“We are entering a new age of energy warfare in the air, land and sea,” said MAFAT Commander Brig.

Gen. Yaniv Rotem. “The research and development investments made by the [Defense Ministry] in recent years have placed the State of Israel among the leading countries in the field of high-energy laser systems.”

With the electoral threshold looming, the Labor party agreed on a joint run with the far-left Meretz ahead of the upcoming elections in March.

Following marathon negotiations between Labor chairman Amir Peretz and Meretz leader Nitzan Horowitz, the two parties agreed to merge in order to avoid failing to make it into the Knesset.

The unified list will be led by Amir Peretz, followed by Orly Levi-Abeksis, while Nitzan Horowitz will be third. Closing out the top five in the merged party are Meretz MK Tamar Zandberg and Labor lawmaker Itzik Shmuli.

“This is a significant move for the 2020 election, which will ensure the ability to form a government of change and hope,” Peretz and Horowitz said in a statement. They added that the slate will be “the social heart and diplomatic compass for the next government after the end of the Netanyahu era.”

The two parties had failed to unite in the past two elections, with leaders Amir Peretz and Avi Gabbai avoiding the extreme-left Meretz in a bid to woo right-wing Mizrahi voters. With both parties hovering around the electoral threshold, however, they are being forced to run together to avoid wasting as much as four Knesset seats.

Notably, the union leaves out firebrand lawmaker Stav Shaffir, likely ending her political career.

The radical left-wing MK rose to fame during Israel’s mammoth cost of living protests in 2010, catapulting the young leftist into the public eye. Her loud and direct style quickly won her admirers, and many predicted that Shaffir would one day rise to lead Labor. However, Shaffir quit Labor prior to the September elections to run on a list headed by former Prime Minister Ehud Barak and Meretz. Titled the “Democratic

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Union,” the slate only garnered five seats and collapsed following the elections, causing Shaffir to be left without a political home.

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Defense Minister Naftali Bennett’s New Right party announced on Monday that it will run independently in the upcoming Knesset elections in March.

“The New Right will run independently in the upcoming election as the party of the ideological and liberal right-wing,” the faction said in a statement. “This is the rightwing bloc’s only chance of reaching 61 seats [in the Knesset],” the party said.

The move came despite heavy pressure from the Religious Zionist community to merge with the Jewish Home and National Union factions in order to avoid wasting votes.

In a statement, Bennett said that he would target soft-right- voters who would otherwise cast a ballot for Kahol Lavan or Yisrael Beitenu.

In recent days, Bennett had examined the possibility of merging with the Jewish Home and National Union but rejected it in the end out of opposition to running together with the radical right-wing Otzma Yehudit.

Rabbi Rafi Peretz’s Jewish Home had merged with the neo-Kahanist Otzma Yehudit last month in a move that riled the party’s base. Outraged at the unity deal with a faction many viewed as illegitimate, party activists waged a fierce campaign to scuttle the merger at the last second.

The New Right was formed before last April’s elections after Naftali Bennett split off from the Jewish Home along with Ayelet Shaked.

Hoping to attract secular right-wing voters, the faction failed to pass the electoral threshold by 1,000 votes.

The New Right then united with the Jewish Home and National Union ahead of the September elections but split off to become an independent faction soon after the polls closed.

NJ’s the Best Place to Be

Raising a family is known to be expensive. Last year, a study by the Economic Policy Institute found that the average family of four in the United States spends upwards of $6,000 annually in various child-related expenses, with the amount rising in pricey cities.

That’s why families may want to look into relocating to New Jersey.

According to a new report by WalletHub, the sometimes-overlooked coastal state is the most affordable locale in the country. Analyzing an abundance of data from the U.S. Census Bureau, the National Center for Education Statistics, and the Department of Health, the study found that the median family in the state earns $97,300 a year.

Well beyond the annual median of $73,000, New Jersey’s median family’s income is also the third highest in the United States. In addition, the report found that New Jersey residents enjoy the country’s fifth best education and childcare.

However, not everything is perfect in the Garden State. Coming in a distant 15th place in the health and safety category, WalletHub found that New Jersey suffers from a relatively high crime rate, poor water quality, and a disproportionate amount of uninsured children.

Overall, the tri-state area did well in the report, with Connecticut and New York both finishing in the top 10 of the affordability index. Coming in at fourth place, New York ranked first in family fun and has a media income of over $80,000.

Meanwhile, Connecticut nabbed the number 5 spot in affordability, along with the No. 2 ranking in education and child care. The state also has the fifth lowest rate of violent crime in the United States.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Former New York City mayor and presidential candidate Michael Bloomberg is ready to put his money where his mouth is.

The billionaire Democratic Party candidate pledged to spend as much as $1 billion to ensure that President Trump is removed from office, even if he doesn’t win the nomination.

Speaking to The New York Times, Bloomberg said that he would finance a fully stocked communications team to support any eventual Democratic nominee, effectively funding a shadow presidential campaign.

“It depends whether the candidate needs help; if they’re doing very well, they need less. If they’re not, they’ll need more,” said Bloomberg.

While not going into details about the size of his anti-Trump operation, reports say that Bloomberg is looking to hire hundreds of people to staff field positions until the general election. Despite reiterating numerous times that he views Senators Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders unnecessarily radical, he pledged to use his massive wealth to help them remove Trump from office if need be.

“I really don’t agree with them,” said Bloomberg, “but I’d still support them, yes, because compared to Donald Trump that’s easy.”

The billionaire had thrown his hat into the crowded ring in November. Arguing that the current slate of Democratic Party contenders has moved too radical and is now unelectable, Bloomberg tacked to the center with his full-throated endorsement of corporate America.

Acknowledging that he has little chance of emerging victorious in early voting states such as Iowa and New Hampshire, the former mayor has set his sights on late-primary states. Bloomberg has shown no qualms over spending his immense wealth and has already spent more on advertising than the 2012 Obama campaign spent in total.

wit

The United States booted a dozen Saudi Arabian air force pilots from a training program just a few weeks after a Saudi officer shot and killed four people at a Florida naval base.

While none of the Saudis expelled from U.S. military training programs are believed to have played any role in the shooting, many were found to hold extremist leanings.

“In the wake of the Pensacola tragedy, the Department of Defense restricted to classroom training programs foreign military students from Saudi Arabia while we conducted a review and enhancement of our foreign student vetting procedures,” said Lt. Col. Robert Carve.

“That training pause is still in place while we implement new screening and security measures.”

During the attack, which took place on December 26, 2019, 21-yearold Mohammed Alshamrani sprayed a class with his personal pistol at Pensacola Air Base in Florida, killing three sailors and a civilian employee.

He was shot and killed by two deputies, ending the murderous spree.

Those killed were identified as Airman Apprentice Cameron Scott Walters, 21; Mohammed Haitham, 19; and Joshua Kaleb Watson, 23.

Eight others were injured.

Alshamrani had served as a lieutenant in the Saudi air force and was part of a three-year course given by the U.S. Navy. Following the massacre, the Pentagon opened an investigation into the 850 Saudi officers participating in similar programs in order to root out any potential security risks.

The decision to expel the 12 trainees comes as the FBI is reportedly ready to officially conclude that the shooting was an act of terrorism.

Alshamrani was a known admirer of Saudi Osama bin Laden and had hosted a party featuring videos of mass shootings on the day before he opened fire at the airbase.

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Since throwing his hat into the ring, Bloomberg has consistently risen through the polls, in part due to mammoth ad buys costing hundreds of millions of dollars. While he currently trails leading candidates Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, and fellow ex-Mayor Pete Buttigieg, he has blown past Andrew Wang and Senator Amy Klobuchar in the polls.

Trump to Roll Back EPA Legislation

President Donald Trump wants to eliminate a major environmental regulation in order to make it easier for government to embark on large infrastructure projects.

Known as the National Environmental Policy Act (NEPA), the 50-year-old guidelines mandate the federal government to consider potential environmental damage before beginning major initiatives such as highways, dams, and bridges. NEPA also allows non-government organizations to file appeals in order to stop projects they see as damaging to the environment.

According to the new rules, federal agencies would only need to consider environmental damage that are merely “reasonably foreseeable” with a “close causal relationship” to the project in question.

Crucially, federal agencies will no longer have to examine the “cumulative” effects of new projects, in what is an attempt to deny NGOs the ability to torpedo infrastructure projects by citing greenhouse gas emissions. The new rules also allow corporations to conduct their own environment reviews and exempts government-funded projects built with minimal taxpayer money.

In announcing the move, Trump said that NEPA hurts the economy due to the extensive bureaucracy the regulation causes. The president added that rolling back the thicket of rules would speed up the approval process for large projects that the

government has in the pipeline.

“These endless delays waste money, keep projects from breaking ground, and deny jobs to our nation’s incredible workers,” Trump said at a White House press conference. “From day one, my administration has made fixing this regulatory nightmare a top priority.”

The initiative was immediately condemned by environmental groups, who promised to fight the regulatory rollback in court. “Today’s action is nothing more than an attempt to write Donald Trump’s climate denial into official government policy,” said Sierra Club Executive Director Michael Brune. “Communities across the country are already feeling the effects of climate change, but rather than protect them, Trump is pulling out all the stops to silence their voices and further prop up his corporate polluter friends.”

Cory Calls It Quits

This week, Senator Cory Booker officially bowed out of the race for the Democratic nomination after struggling to garner support from voters and donors.

The news of the senator’s decision came weeks before the Iowa caucuses, where, despite a large field organization, Booker was expected to finish outside of the top tier of candidates, based on recent polling.

His announcement also came on the eve of the seventh Democratic debate which he did not qualify to participate in due to a lack of qualifying polls towards Democratic National Committee polling thresholds.

“It’s with a full heart that I share this news – I’ve made the decision to suspend my campaign for president,” Booker wrote supporters in an email, echoing the sentiment in a video. “It was a difficult decision to make, but I got in this race to win, and I’ve always said I wouldn’t continue if there was no longer a path to victory.”

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

One Israel Fund: Celebrating 25 Extraordinary Years

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RENAFORTEENS@GMAIL.COM Booker, 50, who has served in the U.S. Senate since 2013 following two terms as mayor of Newark, New Jersey’s most-populated city, centered his presidential campaign around an optimistic message of unity and love, aiming to counter the division and “hate” he said had come to characterize politics.

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tearing us apart in this country are stronger than the forces that tie us together. I don’t believe that,” Booker said on “The View” in February 2019, during his first television interview after announcing his presidential run. “So, I’m running to restore our sense of common purpose, to focus on the common pain that we have all over this country.”

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Florida Teachers Protest

On Monday, many teachers in the state of Florida left their desks and headed to the state capital to demand an increase in education funding. It was the day before the new legislative session began.

Many of the protesting teachers took personal days off work to rally in Tallahassee. No school district had to close because of the one-day protest.

Fedrick Ingram, president of the Florida Education Association, said that it’s critical for lawmakers to hear the teachers’ voices before the new legislative session.

“At the beginning of this school year, 3,000 classrooms did not have a certified teacher,” Ingram said.

Florida ranks among the bottom 10 states in funding for students, and state education funding hasn’t climbed above pre-recession levels from a decade ago, the union said.

“Last August, more than 300,000 students started school without a full-time, permanent teacher,” the FEA said. “Dozens of high schools with enrollment exceeding 1,000 students lack a physics teacher.”

The average teacher’s salary in Florida is in the mid-$40,000s, and “many school staff earn a wage below the federal poverty line,” the union said.

To combat these problems, union members are demanding a “Decade of Progress.” The proposed plan includes a “$2.4 billion-a-year infusion” for education funding for each of the next 10 years. According to Ingram, a $2.4 billion boost this year would allow every public school employee to receive a raise of 10%.

Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis’ proposed 2020 budget includes a $600 million investment that would boost teachers’ starting salaries from $37,636 to $47,500. DeSantis’ plan also includes $900 million “to recruit and retain the best classroom teachers and principals in Florida.”

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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The Bed Bug Capital

If you thought that things in Washington, D.C., were a bit creepy, you were right. It turns out that our nation’s capital is also the capital for bed bugs in the nation. Yep, D.C. has been ranked the top bed bug city in the country – surpassing nearby Baltimore in the process – by pest control company Orkin.

Baltimore was ranked No. 1 for three straight years before falling to No. 2 on Orkin’s annual list this year.

Washington was ranked No. 2 last year.

Chelle Hartzer, an Orkin staff entomologist, notes that Baltimore and D.C. consistently rank at the top of the bed bug list because of their size and the amount of domestic and international travel in and out of them.

“The more people you have, the more prevalent these pests can be,”

Hartzer adds.

Rounding out the top 10 for bed bugs in the nation were Chicago; Los Angeles; Columbus, Ohio; New York; Detroit; Cincinnati; Indianapolis; and Atlanta.

“While bed bugs have not been found to transmit any diseases to humans, they can be an elusive threat to households,” Hartzer said. “They are excellent hitchhikers, and they reproduce quickly which make it nearly impossible to prevent bed bugs. Sanitation has nothing to do with where you’ll find them.”

According to Orkin, signs of bed bugs could include “small black spots indicating bed bug feces or nymph bed bugs in places such as mattress seams, bed frames and furniture.”

The company recommends that people inspect their homes regularly, decrease clutter, examine secondhand furniture, and frequently wash bed linens with hot water.

“The key to preventing a bed bug infestation is early detection,” Hartzer says. “When one or more bed bugs enter a space, we call it an introduction. During an introduction, bed bugs probably haven’t started reproducing yet, but they could soon.

Vigilance is key to stopping bed bugs before infestation levels.”

Democrats Debate

Only six candidates stood on stage at the Democratic debate in Iowa on Tuesday night, hoping to sway Democrats to pull the lever for them as election season is about to begin. The Iowa caucuses are less than three weeks away.

All eyes were on Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders, as Warren had announced before the debate that Sanders had at one point told her that a woman wouldn’t be able to be elected president.

At the debate, Warren said she wasn’t there to “fight with Bernie” but then proceeded to offer a veiled case against Sanders as the Democratic nominee. She said there was a “real danger” in Democrats “picking a candidate who can’t pull our party together or someone who takes for granted big parts of the Democratic constituency.”

“We need a candidate who will excite all parts of the Democratic Party, bring everyone in,” she said. Warren added that she was the only candidate on the stage to beat an incumbent Republican in the past 30 years. Sanders later clarified that he had also beaten an incumbent Republican, although that was 30 years ago.

Amy Klobuchar attempted to wrestle the spotlight from Warren and Sanders when she brought up healthcare. She pointed to concrete things she’s done and would do, including on drug importation and a bipartisan bill on lowering drug prices. Klobuchar also made a strong play for the substantial-alternative mantle over which she, Pete Buttigieg, and Joe Biden have been fighting.

Buttigieg seemed lackluster throughout the evening, throwing the same punches and hitting the same notes as he made in previous debates, including criticizing Medicare-for-all as being unrealistic and knocking a “Washington mentality.”

Joe Biden may just end up being the winner in Iowa in a few weeks, and on stage on Tuesday he performed like Biden – nothing too strong or too weak, talking about his family history

and managing to avoid any stumbles.

Biden also kept his answers short, which may have helped in him avoiding any verbal landmines.

Viewers were looking to see what Democrats would be saying about foreign policy issues, being that tensions have ratcheted over Iran. But most of what was addressed during the debate was general talk about taking troops out of combat and leaving in other troops in other roles. Criticizing Trump was highlighted – but that was nothing new.

A candidate who was not onstage managed to garner some attention with his tweets. Mike Bloomberg’s campaign fired off a bunch of deliberately bogus #DebateFacs during the debate, including: “During the 1996 primaries, Mike Tyson bit off part of Pat Buchanan’s ear. #DebateFacts #DemDebate” and “Mike has eaten clams casino for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day for the past 30 years. #BloombergFacts #DemDebate.”

Perhaps it was their way of bringing some entertainment to a very un-entertaining evening.

Mysterious Money

Since 2014, piles of cash have been showing up on the streets of the village of Blackhall Colliery, in County Durham, in the United Kingdom. No one knew how they came or what they were for. In total, at least £26,000 had been left randomly in the village, usually on the sidewalks.

Now, police have been able to solve the mysterious mounds of money littering the pavement.

In turns out that two “good Samaritans” have identified themselves to police as the people behind the bundles of cash. They had dropped the piles of £20 notes – each time amounting to about £2,000 – around Blackhall Colliery over the past six

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

EARL Y ENDS BIRD T SUND HIS J A N 1 AY 9TH!

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

years in the hopes that they would be picked up by people in need.

For now, the two people wish to remain anonymous. Both benefactors had received “unexpected windfalls” and had wanted to give something back.

One of the good Samaritans told officers that they felt an “emotional connection” to the village after being helped by one of its residents and wanted to repay the kindness. They had dropped the cash and then waited to make sure it was picked up before moving along, never wishing to be thanked for their generosity.

Throughout the years, 13 people had come to police with the found cash, hoping to return it to the rightful owners. The cash was returned to them when officers couldn’t find to whom it belonged.

Umm, is there any way these guys can come to a small village called Lawrence?

$9M for Free Yusaku Maezawa likes to experiment with his money. The Japanese fashion tycoon is giving away $9 million to some of his Twitter followers in

what he calls a “social experiment.”

Maezawa will give 1 million yen ($9,000) to 1,000 followers selected at random from those who retweeted a January 1 post of his, with the impact of the money to be tracked through regular surveys.

“It’s a serious social experiment,” said Maezawa on YouTube, adding he hopes to attract interest from academics and economists.

Maezawa, who is set to be the first private passenger to fly around the moon with Elon Musk’s SpaceX, is known for his high spending on art and sports cars but also has a predilection for musing on ideas like a world without money.

He tied the $9 million giveaway to the idea of basic income, or the theory of providing a periodic no-stringsattached payment to all citizens, that

has gained traction in some political circles.

“Basic means a regular minimum amount offering a sense of security, what Maezawa is offering is totally different,” noted Toshihiro Nagahama, senior economist at Dai-ichi Life Research Institute.

Maezawa has garnered almost 7 million followers on Twitter with his mix of displays of conspicuous consumption and folksy pronouncements on the meaning of life. YouTube is the latest online outlet for the businessman, with videos including a tour of his private jet, a visit to the barber to dye his hair, and updating his bank book after a recent windfall.

No doubt that $9 million for free will get him more followers. Hey, who said that money can’t buy everything?

20-Year-Old Burger

Well, if you wondered how your teenager was eating your cholent from last Shabbos on Thursday night without ending up in the emergency room, you may want to read on.

David Whipple of Utah has been performing some sort of experiment with a hamburger from McDonald’s that he purchased in 1999. The 20-year-old burger looks almost just like it did when Whipple purchased it two decades ago.

McDonald’s decided to speak out when they heard Whipple’s burgers’s miraculous saga. Despite the burger looking OK, the food chain said, Whipple shouldn’t be eating the fast food staple from the past.

“In the right environment, our burgers, like most other foods, could decompose,” said Anne Christensen, Director of Field Brand Reputation for McDonald’s. “But, in order to decompose, you need certain conditions – specifically moisture. Without sufficient moisture – either in the food itself or the environment – bacteria and mold may not grow and therefore, decomposition is unlikely. So if food is or becomes dry enough, it is unlikely to grow mold or bacteria or decompose.”

In other words, Whipple should dunk the burger in water and see how well that would turn out.

Upon unveiling the 20-yearold burger last week, Whipple said he originally planned to use it in a demonstration of enzymes and deterioration, but left it in his coat pocket and forgot about it for several years.

Apparently, he’s not very good at Pesach cleaning.

Pre-School Picasso

Mikail Akar of Germany is pretty handy with a paintbrush. The seven-year-old has been dubbed the “pre-school Picasso” for his flair with paint and a canvas. His paintings have sold for thousands of dollars to buyers around the world.

“At just seven years old, he is established in the art world. There is interest from Germany, France and the USA,” Mikail’s father and manager, Kerem Akar, said.

Mikail’s talent was discovered quite by accident a few years ago when he was gifted a canvas and some paints for his fourth birthday.

“We had already bought him enough cars and action figures, so we had the idea of getting him a canvas,” Kerem said. “The first picture looked fantastic, and I thought at first that my wife had painted it. I thought maybe it was just coincidence, but by the second and third pictures it was clear he had talent.”

Mikail has developed his own techniques when it comes to painting, including applying paint by punching the canvas with his father’s boxing gloves.

Despite his talent, Mikail sometimes would rather be doing something else.

“Painting is quite tiring for me.

Sometimes it can take a long time... especially with boxing gloves,” he said.

He dreams of becoming a football player when he grows up.

Maybe they’ll give this premature Picasso a pass.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Around the

Community

A Visit to Greenkill Retreat Center

A

fter davening and breakfast last Wednesday, the Yeshiva of Central Queens fifth graders boarded the busses for their annual trip to Greenkill Retreat Center, a nature program in upstate New York.

On Wednesday morning, January 9 the students began their overnight journey. Students were split into groups, and upon arrival, they were introduced to their naturalists with whom they would spend the next two days hiking, participating in team-building activities, and facing

challenging activities like crossing the rope bridge.

With their naturalists, each group participated in various team-building ice breakers. The students learned about nature, the importance of protecting the environment, and safety and survival skills from making compasses to help guide them and how to build shelter and a fire in the woods. After a full day of hiking on trails, visiting a waterfall, and gaining new outdoor skills, the students enjoyed a gourmet barbeque followed by a bird show. At the Birds of Prey

show, students met owls, a vulture, and a falcon. They learned about the role each bird has in protecting our environment. After the show, the students, YCQ chaperones, and the naturalists headed to the dining hall for singing by the fire. The YCQ students had a kumzitz to end a long, exciting day before returning to their bunkhouses.

Following each meal, divrei Torah were given by students, Assaf Davidov, Benjamin Toobian, Dalia Leitner, Rena Schwartz, Buttercup Shwebel, Layla Eisenberg, and Zev

Farber. All students participated in a Torah learning session with Rabbi Joshua Rohr, one of the chaperones and a fifth grade rebbe.

This trip affords students and staff the opportunity to learn about the outdoors through hands-on team-building and challenge activities, increasing the cohesiveness of the students as a grade as they learn to work together, and problem solving as a group while challenging themselves physically, mentally, and socially.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

Around the Community

YOSS Robotics Team Takes First Place at the CIJE Regional Competition

T

he eighth grade Robotics Club at the Abraham and Sara Silber Middle School at Yeshiva of South Shore emerged as champions last week at the Yeshiva CIJE Robotics Competition.

Under the direction of teacher and coach Mrs. Elisheva Pinsky, students used math, engineer ing, advanced technology and a lot of creativity to build and program robots for the competition. They practiced manipulating their robots to perform a series of tasks requiring a combination of speed, dexterity, and efficiency. A huge component of their success leading up to the tournament was the teamwork and achdus that they developed, with every boy focused on what was best for the team.

On Wednesday, 12 teams from yeshivos in the Five Towns, Queens, Manhattan, and Passaic, NJ, came

to the Mechina gym, which was transformed into three arenas and individual team stations. Judges watched, timed, and calculated points in a total of 48 different matches, and after all the points were totaled, the YOSS Mechina students emerged as champions!

Yasher koach to Meir Bahn, Aharon Grossman, Michael Justic, Yaakov Meisner, Dani Roth and Ari Wind, who brilliantly designed and manipulated their robots and brought the trophy home. Congratulations to team coach Mrs. Elisheva Pinsky who worked tirelessly with the boys preparing them for the tournament! We would like to thank The Center for Initiatives in Jewish Education (CIJE) for creating this competition and leading the way in developing an innovative STEM curriculum for yeshivos.

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Around the Community

Kehillas Ahavas Yisrael Chanukas Habayis

A

capacity crowd filled the Bais Medrash and spilled out into the halls of Kehillas Ahavas Yisrael this past Shabbos as the Cedarhurst shul celebrated the Chanukas Habayis of their new building at 545 Arbuckle Ave. In just a few short years, KAY has grown from a small minyan in a garage to one of the premiere batei k’nesiyos in the Five Towns, today under the leadership of Rabbi Daniel Glatstein.

Nearly since its founding, KAY occupied a storefront on Peninsula Boulevard adjacent to the Pickwick convenience store, which became one of the nicknames for the shul in its early days. The shul briefly endured national fame during Hurricane Sandy, when the entire shul was under five feet of water which severely damaged or destroyed nearly all of their Sifrei Torah. But the floodwaters did not dampen the kehillah’s resolve, and they rebuilt quickly, continuing to grow in both numbers and in ruchnius. Over five years ago the congregation set out on an ambitious project to build a permanent home across the street that would not only house the kehillah but serve as an anchor shul to the Cedarhurst and Woodmere communities. Through the tireless efforts of many devoted mispallelim and the generosity of dozens and dozens of donors, the kehillah was finally able to realize their dream this past week.

To celebrate the opening of the new Mikdash Me’at, the shul welcomed chazzan Shulem Lemmer and the Mezamrim Choir, who led the beautiful tefillos over Shabbos. At a Friday night oneg in the shul’s expansive social hall, local rabbanim Rabbi Yaakov Feitman, Mara D’asra of Kehilas Bais Yehuda Tzvi, and Rabbi Aryeh Lebowitz, Mara D’asra of Beis Haknesses of North Woodmere, offered divrei bracha to the gathered guests. Cementing the new building as a true makom Torah right from the start, the shul celebrated not one, but two siyumim as well, a Siyum Hashas

by Mr. Nosson Treitel and a siyum of Meseches Moed Kattan by over a dozen mispallelim who finished the mesechta in honor of the Chanukas Habayis. At Shalosh Seudos, guest speaker Rabbi Dov Loketch, Mara D’asra of Agudas Yisrael of Detroit, shared divrei Torah related to the Chanukas Habayis and wished the ke-

hillah continued hatzlacha.

On Motzei Shabbos, the children of KAY were treated to a Melave Malka concert starring singer Joey Newcomb. After the kids were tucked safely in bed, the adults returned for a formal inauguration ceremony. The event began with the recitation of Tehilim led by Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetzky, Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva of South Shore, and Rabbi Meir Braunstein, Mara D’asra Agudath Israel Of Long Island. Guest speaker Harav Hillel David, Mara D’asra Shaarei Torah Brooklyn, then addressed the crowd of invited rabbanim, local dignitaries including Cedarhurst Mayor Ben Weinstock, and the many friends and family of the shul in attendance.

The ceremony concluded with a passionate speech from Rabbi Glatstein who spoke of how over 90% of those who davened in the shul were grand-

children of Holocaust survivors,and that the establishment of this new shul represented the continued new dawn of Yiddeshkeit, after the tremendous dusk just a few generations ago.

All in attendance then enjoyed a sumptuous Melave Malka with spirited dancing late into the night. At the Melave Malka, Rabbi Yaakov Bender, Rosh Hayeshiva of Yeshiva Darchei Torah, remarked that when he walked into the hall, he was struck by the tre-

mendous achdus amongst the shul members and collective sense of joy.

The new building is dedicated in memory of Mr. Moshe Yaakov Jakabovits, a”h, a Holocaust survivor who fled Hungary to build a new life in America and raise three daughters with his wife, Mrs. Beila Jakabovits, who was in attendance on Motzei Shabbos. In his honor, the shul has adopted its new name, Kehillas Ahavas Yisrael Bais Moshe Yaacov.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Around the Community

Parenting Community Event What Every Preschool Parent Should know about Technology

O

ver 500 preschool parents and educators representing 16 different preschools and yeshivas is in the Five Towns, Far Rockaway, and West Hempstead joined together at the White Shul on Tuesday, January 7. Mr. Richard Altabe was the MC of the evening representing the Consortium of Jewish Day Schools and the many events that are run for professional development.

In Rabbi Feiner’s words of chizuk, he praised the crowd for coming out on this cold evening after a fast day to learn about this important and ever-growing topic.

In an informative and entertaining manner, Dr. Eli Shapiro quoted Charles Dickens in his presentation:

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...” He reminded us how far technology has come from the days of American Online and pointed out that the ease and access of technology today gives us endless possibilities yet this creates an environment that makes it very easy for children to spend too much time on technology.

Among the many messages learned were: • The American Academy of Pediatrics recommendation that children under 18 months should avoid screen time and that children ages 2-5 should be limited to under one hour of screen time a day • Parents should model health technology behavior

• Create family age-appropriate rules and sticking to them.

The event was recorded and will be available through the participating schools within the next few weeks.

Follow-up events are already in the planning.

Excerpt from an email from a parent who attended the event: “It was awesome. Your presentation was engaging, thoughtful, well-structured, and informative in a way that allowed me to walk away with immediately actionable insight into how I can make my daughter’s life better.

“Thank you for the work you do to help our community. I felt a sense of

pride sitting in that room along with hundreds of other parents working together to build a better community and future for our growing nation.”

This event was cosponsored by Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam, Bnos Bais Yaakov, CAHAL, Gan Chamesh, Gesher, HAFTR, HALB, HANC, Little Friends Gan, Shulamith, TAG, Yeshiva Darchei Torah, Yeshiva Noam Hatorah, Yeshiva Ketana of LI and Yeshiva of South Shore as well as the Consortium of Jewish Day School, The Jewish Education Project, Gural JCC, Gourmet Glatt, The White Shul, Smart Connections, and The Digital Citizenship Project.

HANC Visits the Museum of Jewish Heritage

T

his past week the eighth grade students at HANC went to The Museum of Jewish Heritage in Manhattan in preparation for the Names, Not Number Holocaust program.

After the students arrived, they received a wonderful introduction from Dr. Paul Radensky, educational director at the museum. Dr. Radensky questioned the group on their knowledge of the Holocaust. Next, the students were split up into different groups with each group assigned their own tour guide. The tour was informational and incredibly poignant for the students, who will be interviewing Holocaust survivors later this year. As the groups were taken to different floors, the information featured pre- and post-Holocaust stories and real artifacts. There were so many meaningful exhibits, including one which showed the actual structures of Auschwitz.

There was one exhibit which

featured a red shoe. This was most significant for the students because it reinforced the human nature and loss in the Holocaust. In fact, many of the Jewish lives lost at the time

were the same age as these eighth graders.

After the tour, there was an activity in which the eighth graders were shown an “artifact” (picture) which

they connected to a part of Jewish resistance during the war.

Overall, this was a meaningful and imperative introduction to the Names, Not Numbers program.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Around the Community

Yeshiva Darchei Torah Dinner Featured Awards, Surprises & Inspiration PHOTOS BY TSEMACH GLENN

R’ Yaakov Bender, rosh hayeshiva, delivering his chinuch address

Mr. Shia Ostreicher, guest of honor

R’ Shlomo Avigdor Altusky, rosh yeshiva

Mr. Ronald Lowinger, president of Yeshiva Darchei Torah

Mr. Elisha Brecher, co-chairman of the board of directors, served as master of ceremonies

Executive board member Mr. Yehuda Biber, who unveiled the yeshiva’s exciting new building plans

R’ Yaakov Bender presenting a surprise award to Mr. Everett Fortune, the yeshiva’s veteran security chief

R’ Moshe Bender, associate dean

R’ Nosson Scherman, general editor of ArtScrollMesorah, who made the presentation to R’ Shimon Finkelman, Harbotzas Torah awardee

Shauly Waldner, who sang zemiros to musical accompaniment during the dessert reception

R’ Avrohom Bender, menahel in YDT; R’ Lloyd Keilson, board of trustees co-chairman; R’ Shlomo Yossi Hecht acknowledging the crowd after the feature video, Avigdor Altusky, rosh yeshiva; Mr. Shia Ostreicher, guest of honor; Mr. Reuven Wolf; R’ Yaakov “The Whole Picture – One Talmid’s Story,” flanked by, L-R: R’ Bender, rosh hayeshiva; and Mr. Ronald Lowinger, president Moshe Bender, R’ Shlomo Avigdor Altusky, and R’ Yaakov Bender

L-R: R’ Shlomo Avigdor Altusky, Mr. Carmi Gruenbaum, Kesser Shem Tov awardee; and R’ Yaakov Bender

R’ Avrohom Bender; R’ Lloyd Keilson; R’ Shlomo Avigdor Altusky; Mr. Yitzchok Steg, Parents of the Year awardee; R’ Yaakov Bender; Mr. Ronald Lowinger; and R’ Moshe Bender

R’ Shlomo Avigdor Altusky, Mr. Allen Federman, R’ Avrohom Bender, R’ Elya Kanarek, rosh hayeshiva, Ohr Hameir of Peekskill; R’ Joel Beritz, Architect of Jewish Education awardee; R’ Yaakov Bender, Mr. Ronald Lowinger, and R’ Moshe Bender

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

HALB Lev Chana Celebrates Sefer Bereishis

E

xcitement permeated the air as Friday arrived. A sea of beautifully decorated crowns with pictures of Sifrei Torah, illustrations of stories from favorite parshiot, and Aleph Bet letters filled the multi-purpose room as Rabbi Yossi Ungar, first grade HALB rebbe, shared d’vrei Torah, stories and songs and asked questions about the 12 parshiot of Sefer Bereishit with the kindergarten children and their morot. Led by Morah Felecie Akerman, the 4-yearold nursery children and their morot watched a pictorial presentation and sang songs from each parsha. Our 3-year-old children sang and danced in the hallways holding sifrei Torah.

Special Torah cookie treats in addition to the regular delicious Shabbat snacks were enjoyed by all.

SKA Reunion in Israel

T

he annual Stella K. Abraham High School for Girls Israel alumnae reunion is one of the most highly anticipated events of the year.

At the gathering at the OU Center in Jerusalem, held this year on Asarah b’ Teves, Tuesday, January 6, Mrs. Elisheva Kaminetsky, principal, Religious Studies, and Mrs. Paghit Ralbag, 12th Grade Level Advisor, welcomed the girls who are attending Israeli seminaries this year. Before the fast ended, Mrs. Kaminetsky gave an insightful shiur to the alumnae.

Following the break-the-fast seudah, there was happy mingling, spirited schmoozing, and much reminiscing.

A special treat at the reunion was seeing former faculty member and SKA graduate Mrs. Aviva Zimmerman Dennis who had taught many of the graduates before moving to Israel and who came with her baby.

Another highlight of the evening was hearing from a panel of six SKA

alumnae who had previously made aliya; all graduated different years, have different professions, and live in different communities in Israel. Shaina Margolis Wurtzberger, Abby Rabinowitz Beinenfeld, Talia William Eisen, Nava Lauer Feigenbaum, Daniella Jacubowitz Berman, and Sharon Elsant Weinstein spoke about their high school years in SKA and what motivated them to move to Israel. They discussed the joys and challenges of living in Israel and gave the recent graduates advice about their seminary year. It was truly a great night for all!

Each SKA graduate also had her own personal meeting with Mrs. Kaminetsky and Mrs. Ralbag to discuss her progress and explore her aspirations for the year. In addition to the reunion and individual meetings, the SKA administrators visited most of the seminaries the alumnae attend.

Our graduates will always be part of the SKA community!

Margolin, Winer & Evens LLP Hosts Business Roundtable

O

n Wednesday, January 8, top accounting and business advisory firm Margolin, Winer & Evens LLP hosted a private business roundtable at Five Fifty Restaurant in Cedarhurst. The audience was made up of local business owners, executives and entrepreneurs who live in the area, including many who deal with real estate in the Northeast.

Speakers included Yisrael Zwick, MWE partner Steven Schlachter,

CPA, and Mordy Serle, a partner at law firm Meltzer Lippe, Goldstein & Breitstone LLP. Mr. Schlachter discussed tax issues and opportunities for real estate professionals and entrepreneurs, financing, and buying/selling, while Mr. Serle covered trusts and estate planning.

Attendees also engaged in a Q&A and networking session following the presentations.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

Induction Ceremony at Hempstead Town Hall

U

nity was the theme last week at Hempstead Town Hall’s Nathan L. H. Bennett Pavilion, as hundreds were in attendance to witness the induction of Supervisor Don Clavin, along with Town Clerk Kate Murray, Receiver of Taxes Jeanine Driscoll, Councilman Bruce Blakeman, Councilman Tom Muscarella and Councilman Christopher Carini.

The newly inducted officials were joined by their colleagues on the Town Board, Senior Councilwoman Dorothy Goosby, Councilman Anthony D’Esposito and Councilman Dennis Dunne, Sr. The event featured a special video presentation that incorporated the appearances and voices of Hempstead Town employees representing over 20 departments that serve the residents of America’s largest township.

Prominently displayed throughout the ceremony was the “Welcome to Hempstead Town” banner, crafted by members of Camp ANCHOR, the

township’s program for children and adults with special needs.

Today’s ceremony kicked off with an opening appearance by the Nassau County Police Department’s

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Pipes and Drums, followed by the presentation of colors by members of the U.S. Marine Corps of Garden City. A musical selection was performed by the talented Uniondale High School Choir. The event also featured remarks from renowned clergy members and other guest speakers.

In outlining his vision for the future of Hempstead Town, Supervisor Clavin invoked the wisdom of President Theodore Roosevelt in a call for unity and a working partnership between elected officials and the hard-working residents of America’s largest township.

“President Roosevelt once said, ‘The government is us, we are the government, you and I,’” stated Supervisor Clavin. “As Supervisor of the Town of Hempstead, I vow to work alongside my colleagues on the Hempstead Town Board and ensure that Town Hall is providing programs, services and policies that are in the best interest of the residents of our great township.”

Supervisor Clavin went on to detail his plans for revitalizing area downtowns with transit-oriented mixed-use development, creating transformative development zones to improve communities, increase road improvement projects and protect the local environment.

The former Receiver of Taxes also promised to create additional op-

portunities for women and minorities at Hempstead Town Hall.

“The Town of Hempstead is one of the greatest places in the world in which to live, work and raise a family,” continued Clavin. “However, we can always do more and will continue to do more to better communities, support local businesses, create jobs and improve our town’s quality of life.”

Receiving a huge ovation upon her return to Hempstead Town Hall was newly inducted Town Clerk Kate Murray, who served as Supervisor from 2003 to 2016. As Clavin held the role of Receiver of Taxes for the past 18 years, he and Murray worked together to assist town residents through various property tax exemptions and other fiscally conservative initiatives.

“Serving the residents of the Town of Hempstead was the greatest honor of my life, and I am proud to return in the role of Town Clerk,” stated Murray. “Under the leadership of Supervisor Don Clavin, who I had the pleasure of working with for so many years, I am confident that we will accomplish great things for the residents of America’s largest township.”

Jeanine Driscoll was inducted as Receiver of Taxes and vowed to continue Clavin’s legacy of advocacy for Hempstead Town taxpayers.

“Don Clavin left big shoes to fill at the Office of the Receiver of Taxes, but I am eager to step into the role and continue his excellent record of service and leadership on behalf of town residents,” said Driscoll. “I look forward to working with Supervisor Clavin and all the members of the Hempstead Town Board.”

“As we enter a new decade, I am energized to work with Don Clavin and my Town Board colleagues in addressing issues of government efficiency, public safety and economic development as well as overall quality of life in our Town,” stated Councilman Bruce A. Blakeman.

Supervisor Clavin offered his congratulations to all of the inductees, and promised to work with the entire Town Board to serve the residents of Hempstead Town.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Around the Community

YOSS ECC Remembers Sefer Bereishis

D

ressed as Avraham Avinu, Yosef Hatzaddik, Yaakov, Eisav, and various animals, the nursery and kindergarten at Yeshiva of South Shore ECC shared with their friends the pictures they created depicting their favorite part of Sefer Bereishis.

Our Pre-1A boys had a more chashuva siyum, in the elementary school, where they dressed in dark pants and white shirts, and joined together for singing, dancing, and review questions. This Sefer Bereishis experience encouraged creativity, self-esteem, group work, public speaking, strengthening memories, and, of course, fun.

Mount Sinai South Nassau Earns Designation as Minimally Invasive Gynecology Surgery Center of Excellence

M

ount Sinai South Nassau’s Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology and its staff of board certified gynecologic and uro-gynecologic surgeons have earned top recognition from the American Association of Gynecologic Laparoscopists (AAGL) and the Surgical Review Corporation (SRC) as a Center of Excellence in Minimally Invasive Gynecology.

The AAGL – the leading association promoting minimally invasive gynecologic surgery among surgeons worldwide – partnered with SRC to develop the Center of Excellence program as a quality improvement initiative and to achieve its vision of advancing minimally invasive gynecology surgery worldwide. Minimally invasive surgery using medical technology ranging from robotics to the laparoscope reduces trauma to surrounding tissue, blood loss during surgery, and postoperative pain, leading to a speedier recovery and return to daily activities.

“This designation affirms our steadfast commitment to improving quality and safety for our patients on a continuous basis,” said Alan Garely, MD, chair of obstetrics and gynecology at Mount Sinai South Nassau and Professor of Obstetrics, Gynecology, and Reproductive Science at Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai.

“Under Dr. Garely’s leadership, our women’s services program has consistently achieved levels of excel-

lence each year. This is another significant milestone that demonstrates our commitment to provide the highest level of care for women,” said Richard J. Murphy, Mount Sinai South Nassau’s president and CEO. Center of Excellence designation requires an extensive review of a hospital’s surgical facilities, operations, and procedures as well as its staff’s education, training, and continuous quality improvement efforts. Physicians who earn this designation must meet stringent criteria based on their individual expertise and experience.

Mount Sinai South Nassau’s Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology offers women access to specialized health care for optimum treatment of reproductive health conditions, from endometrial biopsies and colposcopies to gynecologic oncology.

At Mount Sinai South Nassau’s Women’s Center for Pelvic Floor Disorders, all-too-common conditions such as incontinence and constipation are effectively diagnosed and treated using state-of-the-art technology administered by highly skilled surgeons.

Mount Sinai South Nassau is one of only a handful of locations in the country that offers this service.

The department’s Center for New Beginnings holds Perinatal Care Certification from The Joint Commission and provides parents and their newborn babies with the specialized, compassionate health care they need and deserve from conception through

delivery. Delivering approximately 2,000 babies per year, the Center features 26 private mother-baby rooms with first-class hotel-like accommodations, spacious labor and delivery rooms, and a six-bed Level II neonatal intensive care unit and is staffed by a team of experienced obstetricians, perinatal nurses, lactation consultants, and high-risk pregnancy specialists.

Mothers and unborn children with high-risk conditions that, if left untreated, could jeopardize the health

and well-being of the child, mother, or both, receive the specialized care and monitoring that they require at the department’s Center for Maternal Fetal Medicine. The only center of its kind based on the South Shore of Nassau County, the Center for Maternal Fetal Medicine is staffed with highly skilled and trained perinatologists (obstetricians) and uses the latest advances in maternal-fetal medical technologies, including comprehensive ultrasound, genetic testing and counseling, and advanced fetal monitoring.

Protecting Kids from Harmful Secondhand Smoke

S

enator Todd Kaminsky, a member of the Senate Health Committee, co-sponsored legislation prohibiting smoking in a car, van, or truck with a passenger younger than 14 years of age.

“The dangers of secondhand smoke are life-threatening and we must take every precaution available to limit its effects on our children,” Senator Kaminsky said. “You can’t smoke on a plane, you can’t smoke in a restaurant, and you shouldn’t be able to smoke in a car if kids are passengers. I’m proud to support this potentially life-saving legislation.”

The harmful effects that secondhand smoke can have on people, especially children, have been

well-documented. The CDC estimates that secondhand smoke causes an estimated 41,000 deaths each year in the United States, including 7,333 deaths annually due to lung cancer alone.

In 2006, the U.S, Surgeon General issued a report, “The Health Consequences of Involuntary Exposure to Tobacco Smoke,” saying that SHS is a serious health hazard that can lead to disease and premature death in children. The report details that even brief exposure to SHS has immediate, adverse effects on the cardiovascular system and that because the bodies of infants and children are still developing, they are especially vulnerable to the poisons in SHS.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Around the Community

Brain Breaks at Shulamith

W

hat’s the best part about studying? The breaks, of course!

Midterms week offered more than just exams to Shulamith High School students. To begin with, students were well prepared for their exams not only with typical reviews and review sheets, but each teacher offered a two-hour Q&A session in between morning and afternoon finals. This allowed students to clarify misunderstandings or have difficult concepts explained.

Student Activities Director Esty Munk, along with the incredibly involved GO, planned intermittent “brain breaks.” Brain breaks are energizing bursts of activity that increase blood flow in the brain. Studies show that the increase of oxygen in the brain due to brain breaks help students better retain information.

Make-your-own-trail mix,

make-your-own-stress ball, dodgeball, and an ice-skating trip were all organized to give students an opportunity to have fun and release stress,

all the while increasing their ability to study effectively.

The entire staff and student body is eternally grateful to Esty Munk

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

Mesivta Netzach HaTorah enjoyed an uplifting Shabbos upstate in Camp Nageela together with the rabbeim and their families. Rav Baruch Frand, shlita, joined them and added inspirational divrei Torah and shmuessen. It was truly a Shabbos hischazkus

Becoming a Bat Mitzvah

Rabbi Hanoch Teller Inspires at Learning Program

R O

n Wednesday evening, January 8, Shulamith sixth graders welcomed many beloved relatives to celebrate their entrance to the age of mitzvot! Mrs. Rookie Billet, Shulamith Middle Division principal, delivered a short welcome address in which she charged everyone to consider the character traits they cherish most.

The students then performed a beautiful cantata in Ivrit which told the stories of the seven prophetesses of the Jewish nation. The script was composed by Morah Chana Schwartz, based on sources in the Tanach and the Medrash Agaddah.

The beautiful voices of the girls filled the room as they sang songs taught to them by music teacher, Morah

Tali Spector. The girls also shared a charming musical rendition of Shirat Chana which they learned in Morah Chani Pollak’s Navi class, with interpretive hand motions that explained the words of the Shira.

After enjoying a scrumptious dinner, participants rotated through three workshops, including a shiur with Morah Chana Schwartz about Jewish heroines from Tanach, baking challah with Morah Shoshana Fischman, and simcha dancing with Morah Tali Kozachkov.

The celebration concluded with the presentation of personalized siddurim, sponsored by the Shulamith Women’s Organization, to each bat mitzvah.

abbi Hanoch Teller, famed author and lecturer, was the guest speaker at the Yeshiva of South Shore Motzei Shabbos Learning Program. YOSS hosted Rabbi Teller where he regaled the audience with stories and relevant lessons. One was a story about the Ba’al Shem Tov on the topic of improving our kavanah in davening and another story about Rav Eliyahu C. Meisels of Lodz which taught the lesson of empathy and having compassion for others.

Rabbi Teller was entertaining and inspired the crowd of over 150 people that had the zechus to hear him.

Did you know?

Queen Elizabeth II (a princess at the time) married the son of Prince Andrew of Greece, Philip Mountbatten, on November 20, 1947.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

HANC at Hidden Sparks

S On Monday, January 6, MTA held its first study night of the year, with more than 200 students participating

HANC Hurricane Café

H

ANC High School students are ending a successful fall semester on a high note and are eagerly looking forward to winter break. In order to lessen the stress of students during their midterms, on Wednesday, January 8, the Student Senate ran their annual Hurricane

Cafe, giving out free coffee, tea, and hot chocolate. This was a great way for students to relax a little as they studied diligently before their exams. Students truly appreciated the Student Senators’ efforts to help ease their anxieties surrounding midterms.

everal members of the staff from HANC’s Samuel and Elizabeth Bass Golding’s Elementary School in West Hempstead participated in the Hidden Sparks Annual Retreat which was held at the Jewish Heritage Museum in Manhattan. Hidden Sparks is a nonprofit organization whose goal is to help children with learning differences reach their full potential in the classroom as well as in life. Hidden Sparks develops and supports professional development programs for Jewish Day Schools to help increase understanding and support for teaching diverse learners so that they can reach their full potential. This yearly retreat enables all Hidden Sparks participants and coaches to learn and work together as well as share experiences with each other.

HANC’s Elementary School has participated in the Hidden Sparks training program for five years, where staff members have been trained to become internal coaches under the leadership of Hidden Sparks external coach extraordinaire, Dr. Sara Reichman. Through a combination of training courses, plus regular meetings with Dr. Reichman, the teachers are now trained in coaching other colleagues and collaborating with them to develop expertise in creating learning opportunities for each child that will address their social, emotional or learning differences and enable them to achieve success.

At this year’s retreat, two members of the staff were invited to par-

ticipate in a panel discussion on how their school is planning to sustain the Hidden Sparks model once the five-year training program has concluded. Barbara Deutsch, associate principal of HANC Elementary School, explained that the Hidden Sparks coaches now meet monthly to discuss issues of concern. This Professional Learning Community examines the children’s learning styles and works together on creating lessons that will enable each child to operate at his/her maximum performance ability in a safe and nurturing environment. Mrs. Nancy Greenberg, HANC’s internal coach coordinator, described the impact that Hidden Sparks has had on the school. “It has changed the way we approach and respond to our students and has made us more reflective and sensitive educators. The camaraderie and shared ideals have helped us navigate the often-challenging moments of teaching.”

The teachers and administrators who attended the retreat found it to be enlightening and enriching, and returned with many new ideas to institute in their classrooms. This year’s contingent from HANC included Barbara Deutsch, Nancy Greenberg, Rivka Goldson, Rebecca Nenner, Barbara Hollander, and Miriam Ross, as well as Rabbi Kalman Fogel, principal of HANC’s Elementary School in Plainview, whose staff has just embarked on a five-year training course with Dr. Reichman.

Did you know?

Queen Elizabeth II was born as Princess Elizabeth Alexandra Mary

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Around the Community

On Monday, January 13, Deputy Presiding Officer Howard Kopel was sworn in for a new term in the Nassau County Legislature for the 13th Legislative Session. Nassau County Clerk Maureen O’Connell swore the Majority Caucus of the Legislature in at an induction ceremony. Later on, at the reorganization meeting of the Legislature, Kopel was reappointed the Deputy Presiding Officer.

More Than 450 Guests Celebrate Honorees at Yeshiva University High Schools’ Annual Dinner of Tribute

Y

eshiva University High Schools welcomed more than 450 guests at its Annual Dinner of Tribute on Wednesday, January 8 at Marina del Ray. Guests explored the strong Torah learning, top-tier education, and powerful legacy that both Yeshiva University High School for Boys (MTA) and Yeshiva University High School for Girls (Central) are known for. The Dinner paid tribute to Guest of Honor Rabbi Michael Taubes (‘76) (YUHSB Rosh Yeshiva), Parents of the Year Tzipporah (‘90) and Moshe Boim (YUHSG parents), and Ethel Dworetsky Morrow Z”L Faculty Award recipient Karen Lavner (‘02)

(YUHSG teacher).

“The Annual Dinner celebrates the Yeshiva University High Schools community as well as the strong Torah, academic, and extracurricular experience we provide for our talmidim as a solid foundation upon which they can build their futures. It unites our inspiring educators, YU Roshei Yeshiva, our dedicated parents, and Jewish communal leaders,” said YUHSB Head of School Rabbi Joshua Kahn. “This year it was a privilege to honor our distinguished Rosh Yeshiva, Rabbi Michael Taubes (‘76). Rabbi Taubes is the personification of learning Torah and living Torah, who has

inspired and educated generations of frum Jews, earning the respect of our talmidim, alumni, fellow Roshei Yeshiva, rebbeim, faculty, and parents. Rabbi Taubes’ wisdom provides us with direction and clarity to make the right decisions, always pushing us to strengthen our relationship with Hashem and our values. His empathy and care for each person enables every member of the MTA community to strive to follow in his footsteps.”

The program included a video series highlighting each honoree as well as the strong Torah, academic, and extracurricular programs provided by the Yeshiva University High Schools.

“Our Annual Dinner is a moment of great celebration for the entire Central family. Recognizing the incredible devotion of our faculty and the great partnership we have with our parents, we are inspired to carry forth our mission!” said YUHSG Head of School Mrs. CB Neugroschl.

The event concluded with a Student Activities Fair, where both YUHSB and YUHSG students showcased their talents in a wide range of extra-curricular activities, including Chess, Robotics, Torah Bowl, STEM, Art, and Civics. Guests enjoyed interacting with students and learning more about their intellectual pursuits.

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community The Ganger Early Childhood Center at TAG kicked off their Safe TAG Talmidah program this week! The Independent Bus Company sent a bus to TAG for the preschool to practice bus safety, and each class practiced climbing on and off the bus and sitting safely on the bus. Each girl received a special keychain for her knapsack and will earn stickers for her keychain for safe bus/carpool behavior.

PJs at Shulamith

H

ow can a pajama party be educational? When it is held at Shulamith Early Childhood

Center!

In honor of Parshat Vayechi, the entire student body at Shulamith ECC, as well as some of the morot, came dressed in their pajamas! Some children even wore fuzzy slippers and toted teddy bears.

It all began as the children listened eagerly to the continuing saga of Yosef in Mitzrayim. They were fascinated to hear that Yaakov gave his children and grandchildren brachot, just like their parents give them a bracha every Friday night at the Shabbat table.

They were so excited to recognize the words Hamalach Hagoel and eagerly sang them along with their morot.

Since the children say Hamalach Hagoel every night before they go to sleep, everyone agreed that a pajama party was a wonderful vehicle to learn important skills in every content area.

The children participated in a special asayfa where the entire school

gathered and enjoyed the reading of two special nighttime books: The Baby Beebee Bird” and Good Night Moon. The children laughed uproariously as the baby bird insisted on singing throughout the night, keeping all of the zoo animals awake. Then, they enjoyed the soothing words of Goodnight Moon. The children liked it so much they listened to it twice!

The younger children created beautiful signs full of stars and night time imagery along with the words to Hamalach Hagoel. The production of this sign required the use of important fine motor muscles as well as

planning and problem solving. Each sign reflected the girls’ individuality and creativity. The children enjoyed looking at the words on the signs as they sang Hamalach Hagoel and then pretended to go to sleep.

The older children exercised their math skills by comparing and contrasting their pajamas! Sorting and classifying are important foundational math skills. The children also needed to do a lot of counting in order to determine which patterns and colors were the most popular. Stars and stripes and hearts abounded.

The children also used their bud-

ding Ivrit language skills to understand the book Layla Tov Yareach.

The book tied beautifully to the letter Yud which they had recently learned.

Yareach was one of the words they chose to put on their list of words beginning with the letter Yud. The day ended with a scrumptious “bedtime snack” of chocolate milk and smores that the children prepared by themselves. Spreading marshmallow fluff was great for their fine motor muscles and counting out chocolate chips was a fun way to do math.

What a delicious end to a day full of fun and learning at Shulamith ECC!

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Around the Community

Savor the Moment Screen-Free

I

n an effort to focus on the light of Torah in these challenging and turbulent times, YOSS grades 3-8 participated in a worldwide program on Chanukah known as the “Savor the Moment Screen-Free” initiative. By putting away all electronic devices for 30 minutes after lighting candles on all the days of Chanukah, our talmidim are able to experience the true essence of Chanukah. Without all the

distractions, the talmdim were able to connect to their families and connect to the yom tov of Chanukah in a more deep and personal fashion. All students that participated received doughnuts and chocolate milk and Amazon gift cards were raffled off for each grade in light of this tremendous accomplishment. Special thanks to TAG International for spearheading this important and necessary project.

Israel’s First English-Language Computer Science Degree for Women is Now in Session

L

ast year, the Jerusalem College of Technology made a groundbreaking announcement.

After much consideration and planning, it was launching Israel’s first English-language computer science degree for women, responding to a strong demand for non-Hebrew speaking religious women to study computer science in Israel in a religious-friendly environment.

Fast forward one year later, and the program is off to a terrific start in its inaugural semester.

As part of JCT’s Machon Tal School, where over 2,500 women study in undergraduate and graduate tracks, the computer science degree for women is a 3-year degree, opening this year with just under 20 students.

The degree is fully recognized by Israel’s Council of Higher Education, making all credits fully transferrable.

“The first year of our women’s computer science program in English has gone incredibly well and we can’t wait to see the program grow and develop,” said Siona Margrett, director of the program. “It’s so inspiring to see these strong, religious women

move to Israel and pursue a college degree in a STEM field. There is a feeling of community among our first class, where they really help and support each other. And because it’s only the first year and the student body is relatively small, it provides a great opportunity for friendship and mentorship.”

The program was built off the existing success of JCT’s International Program in English for Men, which allows students to continue learning with their rabbis in yeshivas in Israel while simultaneously obtaining strong professional training in the areas of business or computers. The well-known Beit Midrash on campus, headed by Rabbi Yosef Tzvi Rimon, also offers a place to study Torah while the students complete their academic courses.

Following three critically formative and intensive years of study in both men’s and women’s programs, students emerge prepared not only to embark on successful career paths but also forge life paths that maintain an abiding fidelity to Torah and Israel.

Hands-on Science at BYQ

T

he students at Bais Yaakov of Queens, from first graders through eighth, are learning science with hands-on activities to make science come to life! The first graders explored the water cycle and watched with awe as solid water, or ice, melted when heat was added to it.

Liquid water was turned into steam when more heat was added. The girls can’t wait to begin their next science unit.

The fourth graders learned about matter on a more complex level.

They discussed physical and chemical changes to matter. The girls experimented with physical changes to paper and Cheerios. They noted the paper and the Cheerios were still the same kinds of matter even if they were crushed or ripped. That brought home the idea of physical change. The girls experimented with chemical change as they mixed bak-

ing soda and vinegar. They watched as something new was created, the gas bubbles flowed to the top of the container and then over. The excitement was palpable as each group eagerly watched its cup “explode” with a chemical reaction. Some girls were excited to try the experiment again at home.

The sixth and seventh graders are working really hard on their science fair projects. The girls work individually or in pairs to come up with a scientific question. After researching and hypothesizing, they design experiments to test their hypotheses.

The girls eagerly anticipate the BYQ Annual Science Fair when they can display their beautiful tri-boards with all the information of their experiments and research. We can’t wait for the big night!

Science is always fun and handson at Bais Yaakov of Queens.

Did you know?

Queen Elizabeth II is the longestreigning British monarch in history

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

The Dirshu Siyum HaShas at Tel Aviv’s Yad Eliyahu An Overview of a Very Special Night

By Rabbi Nachman Seltzer

I

waited for the moment when every seat in the gigantic arena at Yad Eliyahu would be full, knowing that the sight of thousands of bnei Torah celebrating the Siyum HaShas in loving achdus was not something you see every day. I wasn’t disappointed. Black and white in every section of the arena.

Here and there, I could see someone in a yellow vest circulating – Yad Eliyahu security – the contrast in colors catching my eye.

The evening began with Reb Moshe Mona Rosenblum taking his place before the orchestra and leading them in a medley of thunderous marches. While the orchestra played, people found their seats, until the arena was completely full – a picture for all eternity.

As with all Dirshu events, things moved along a strict timeline.

The moment the orchestra finished playing, the MC announced the chazzan for Ma’ariv, Rav Yirmiyah Damen, shlita. Watching more than ten thousand

serious bnei Torah daven Ma’ariv together was a special moment for me. Utter silence filled the great hall, as the gigantic kehillah began davening Shemoneh Esrei.

Far down below on what is normally the parquet floor of the basketball court, long tables were set up for the gedolim who were taking part in the Dirshu Siyum HaShas. In the middle of the floor a gigantic table was set up. It was covered with a beautiful tablecloth and surrounded by light-colored chairs. In the center of the table were hundreds of flow-

ers. This regal table was set up for the “Nivchanei Kinyan Shas” – the incredible talmidei chachamim who had been tested on the entire Shas – in one sitting!

Rav Shimon Galei, shlita, one of the premier gedolim of Bnei Brak, began the evening with words of chizuk to an audience thirsting for exactly what he was giving them. He spoke with his trademark earnestness and concluded his remarks with a kapitel Tehillim, which he recited line for line with the audience.

After Rav Shimon’s speech was finished, there was an explosion of sound from the stage, where a full adult choir and children’s choir stood and sang the opening song of the evening. Two singers stood on the stairs separating the two sections of the stage, and sang one of the songs made famous on the CD produced

by Dirshu for the previous Siyum HaShas seven-and-half years ago. “Dirshu Hashem v’uzo, bakshu panav tamid!”

While the singers sang and the orchestra played, pictures filled the screen at the back of the stage – pictures of thousands of Dirshu participants taking tests in

batei medrashim around the world. Needless to say, it was a memorable sight.

After a musical interlude that turned into a quasi kumzitz in which every member of the audience participated, the MC introduced Rav Chaim Feinstein, shlita, and invited him to be misayem the Shas. Here it was, the great moment had arrived, and Rav Feinstein recited the final words of Shas with emotion and sincerity. He was followed by the Admor of Alexander, shlita, who recited the Hadran, and Rav Leizer Yudel Finkel, shlita, rosh yeshiva of Mir, who said the Kaddish with great concentration as every person in the gigantic arena stood in their spot. Every “amen” shook the rafters.

And then there it was – the final “amen!” The orchestra broke out in magnificent melody. The choirs sang, as did the singers, and, best of all, throughout the arena, thousands of Dirshu Yidden – and those who are not yet officially members of Dirshu – joined hands and began dancing in their places.

“Yehay rava kadamach…”

Picture the scene. Thousands of emotional Yidden dancing in their places and

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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Around the Community clapping their hands in time to the beat. Picture their faces as they sing. Imagine the sound. It was truly beautiful in every way. A scene of achdus, a true celebration of Torah learning. “Ana, ana, ana, avda d’Kudsha Brich Hu….” *** Rav Dovid Cohen, shlita, rosh yeshiva of the Chevron Yeshivah, was then introduced, and he spoke with his regular passion and enthusiasm for Torah and Klal Yisrael. He was followed by the rosh yeshiva of Ponovezh, Rav Boruch Dov Povarsky, shlita, who sat beside Rav Dovid Hofstedter, shlita, Nasi of Dirshu, and spoke to the crowd as if they were all his talmidim. This was followed by another interlude of joyous song and dance. Reb Motti Steinmetz suddenly

appeared and sang two new songs which had been composed especially for the Dirshu Siyumim of 2020. His pure voice rose through the room, to the ceiling and upwards. And that was just the beginning. Because when he sang the famous song “Habein yakir li Efraim,” you could feel the excitement rippling through the room at hearing such a special voice, singing such a special tune.

For the thousands of bnei Torah who filled the room taking part in such a unique evening – it wasn’t just about what was happening in the arena. Because every word of Torah and inspiration that they were listening to, every Kaddish, every “amen,” every uplifting song and music note, would remain with them way after they left Yad Eliyahu at the end of the

night and returned to their everyday lives.

Rav Nissan Kaplan, shlita, rosh yeshiva of Daas Aharon, approached the podium. His speech was extremely powerful. He exhorted the audience to grasp the opportunity of the Dirshu Siyum HaShas to take something onto themselves and to not leave the arena without choosing an additional component for their learning and avodas Hashem.

When he finished, the orchestra began playing again, and every person in the room rose to their feet and began to dance. The sight of so many people dancing for the honor of Hashem was inspirational in the extreme. The song changed to “Yamim al yimay melech,” as Rav Gershon Edelstein, shlita, rosh yeshiva of Ponovezh, and

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Rav Chaim Kanievsky, shlita, entered the arena. The clapping intensified once again, and every voice was raised in song. People were jumping in their spots, as the princes of Torah took their places beside Rav Dovid Hofstedter.

“Ashrei ha’am shekacha lo, ashrei ha’am she’Hashem Elokav!”

Rav Gershon Edelstein was then introduced, and he spoke to the crowd, in his concise style, reminding them of the reason everyone had gathered together at Yad Eliyahu in the first place and what the goal was for such an evening. This was followed by a speech given by Rav Chaim’s son, who read the words and beautiful bracha penned by his illustrious father, especially for this evening. Another letter was read by the son of the Belzer Reb-

be, shlita, on behalf of his father, the Admor of Belz, and was followed by a drasha delivered by Rav Boruch Mordechai Ezrachi, shlita, who spoke with all his heart.

All in all, the evening had been absolutely incredible on every front. It was a night that nobody there would be able to forget. It was a night of Torah celebration, a night of pride in being a Yid – and every person in the great hall knew it and felt a tremendous debt of thanks to Rav Dovid Hofstedter for everything he constantly does for Klal Yisrael.

“Ashreichem, ashreichem, ashreichem Yisrael, talmidei chachamim!”

“Ashreichem, ashreichem, ashreichem, Dirshu Yidden, talmidei chachamim!”

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TJH

Centerfold

The Real Reasons That Prince Harry and Meghan are Giving Up Their Royal Titles They are sick of visiting grandma in Buckingham Palace; it’s way cooler to experience visiting a grandmother in Tower 41.

You gotta be

kidding

The Queen of England was due to arrive at a state dinner in Washington, D.C. Her plane was delayed due to weather conditions, and she was 40 minutes late. Traffic was light, though, and she thought she could make up the time, but the driver was the slowest she ever had.

“Could you drive a bit faster?” she asked.

“No, Your Highness. I cannot speed.”

How would you feel if your last name was Duke of Sussex? Seriously? What does that mean anyway?

“I am in a bit of a rush. I’m sure it’ll be fine,” she implored.

They don’t want to give their next baby a royal name like Bedminster Arthur Polo Rupert Cricket Alexander Lacrosse the Third.

“Fine, pull over, and let me drive!” she commanded.

They wanted to see how many times the media can say “abdicate” in one news segment.

Not wanting to refuse a direct order from the Queen, the driver traded places with the aging monarch.

Nobody like crumpets anyway!

They are craving garlic. (The Queen hates garlic, and it is banned from all royal recipes.)

Being a peasant in America beats being a prince in England.

The royal tiara messed up Meghan’s hair.

They prefer the heavy metal version of “G-d Save the Queen.”

They find the fur hats worn by royal guards to be offensive...

Squirrels are people too!

Because the line of succession for Harry is longer than the line at Trader Joe’s on erev Shavuos.

Prince Harry was tired of being called “the prince with the orange hair and big ears.”

Harry wants to be known as “The Harry, formerly known as Prince.”

Meghan was jealous of her sister-in-law Kate always making a better challah than her…I mean, being future Queen!

They want to move to the U.S. to open up an H&M.

“Ma’am, I cannot.”

She immediately opened the throttle of the provided Rolls-Royce. Soon they were going 130 mph down the beltway.

Red and blue lights flashed; the car was pulled over. A rookie cop called in the speeding ticket but asked for backup.

Dispatch said, “Seems pretty routine.

What seems to be the problem?”

“It’s a very important person, sir, I don’t know what to do.”

“Who is it?” dispatch asked.

“Not sure,” the rookie said, “but they got the Queen driving for them.”

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020 The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

Long Live the Queen a. Elizabeth Alexandra Mary b. Elizabeth Chrysanthemum c. Elizabeth Victoria Isabella d. Elizabeth Eleanor 2. What does Queen Elizabeth II eat for breakfast every morning? a. Corn Flakes b. A bowl of oatmeal, a banana, and two pieces of toast c. A sunny side up and French toast

 Answers 6. B

3. D

5. B

2. A

4. C

1. A

 Wisdom Key 5-6 correct: You are the Duke of Knowitall 2-4 correct: You are slightly royal, like Meghan Markle.

0-1 correct: You are an embarrassment to the royal family... like Prince Harry!

d. Soda bread with a splash of butter and two pieces of cheese 3. Forbes Magazine estimated the royal family’s worth based on a figure including their assets (i.e. Buckingham Palace, crown jewels, etc.), earnings, royalties, etc.

Can you guess how much they are worth? a. $250 million b. $770 million c. $2.2 billion d. $88 billion 4. Which one of the following is not a title of one of the Queen’s four children? a. Duke of Cornwall

b. Princess Royal c. Prince of Badteith d. Earl of Wessex e. Duke of York

prince is this referring to? a. Prince William b. Prince Charles c. Prince Philip

5. According to the documentary “Serving the Royals: Inside the Firm,” there is one current prince who is certainly far from a commoner. “His pajamas are pressed every morning, his shoelaces are pressed flat with an iron, the bath plug has to be in a certain position, and the water temperature has to be just tepid.” And, if that’s not enough, he “has his valets squeeze one inch of toothpaste onto his toothbrush every morning.” Which

d. Prince Edward 6. How did Queen Elizabeth ascend to the throne? a. Her brother died b. Her uncle abdicated c. Her father appointed her over her older brother d. Her mother refused to be queen so Elizabeth got the title instead

Riddle me this?

It’s 1856, and the Queen of England gives birth to twins, although it’s impossible to tell who was born first. Now the twins are adults and ready to rule. One is totally mediocre and unlikable, while the other is highly intelligent, well-loved, and charismatic, yet the unintelligent one is chosen as the next ruler. Why? See answer below

Answer to Riddle Me This: Only one of the twins (the mediocre one) is a male. (Until 2011 males were first in the line of succession to the throne.)

1. What is the Queen of England’s full name?

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Torah Thought

Parshas Shemos

By Rabbi Berel Wein

T

he Torah, Jewish history, and tradition indicate to us that Heaven oftentimes chooses unusual people for roles that are essential and pivotal in Jewish leadership. King David is a clear example of this historical phenomenon. But I think that we can agree that the choice of Moshe to be the redeemer and eternal teacher of the Jewish people, if not of all civilization, is, at first

blush, a strange one.

Moshe has been separated from the Jewish people for decades. Egyptian law had previously slated him for the death penalty for striking an Egyptian taskmaster who was beating a Jewish slave. Moshe is a shepherd in Midian, far removed from his brethren suffering in Egyptian bondage. And when presented by Heaven with the offer of Jewish leadership,

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Moshe declines it very forcefully. But the will of Heaven prevails, as is always the case.

Moshe must now embark on his new role of leadership, albeit seemingly reluctantly. He himself wonders why he is begin chosen, when, logically, his brother Aaron would seem to be a better fit for the mission.

And, perhaps just as amazing as the choice of Moshe for this position of leadership, is the willingness of the Jewish people to instantly accept him as being entitled and fit for that role. To most of the Jewish people he

leaders are eventually undone by the growth of their egos and the resulting arrogance. Not so Moshe. For even after forty years of leading his people, the Torah still describes Moshe as being the most humble of all human beings on the face of the earth.

It is this trait that makes him the greatest of all past and future prophets. Moshe also has within himself an unquenchable love for his people. His love for them is sorely tested many times during his forty-year career as their leader, but in spite of all of their backsliding, sins, rebellions

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is a stranger, an outsider who has a speech impediment and is, at most, a Johnny-come-lately to their troubles and situation. Yet, again we see that it is the will of Heaven that prevails, and it is only through Moshe that the story of the Exodus from Egypt will unfold.

Moshe, however, has outstanding qualities and traits of character that make him the greatest leader in Jewish and world history. Foremost among these attributes is his trait of humility. All leaders must have an appreciation of their talents and possess strong self-worth. However, most

and mutterings, it is Moshe’s love of the people that remains omnipresent and steadfast. As King Solomon wrote: “Love obliterates all transgressions.”

Finally, Moshe’s path to complete the mission that Heaven thrust upon him never wavers, no matter what the events and circumstances may be. These noble traits and characteristics are apparently what the Al-mighty searches for in assigning leaders to our people. Moshe is the model for future Jewish leaders in all generations that will follow him.

Shabbat shalom.

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From the Fire

Parshas Shemos Staying Strong

By Rav Moshe Weinberger Adapted for publication by Binyomin Wolf

A

s we transition from Bereishis to Sefer Shemos, the Torah repeats the names of Yaakov’s sons and concludes (Shmos 1:5), “And it was that the descendants of Yaakov who went down to Egypt were seventy souls, and Yosef was in Egypt.” Because we already knew from Parshas Vayechi that the number of people who went into Egypt included Yosef, it is difficult to understand why the pasuk repeats that point here. Rashi, commenting on the pasuk, therefore writes, “Now were [Yosef] and his sons not already included in the seventy?

What does this come to teach us? Do we not already know that he was in Egypt? Rather, it comes to teach us the righteousness of Yosef. The Yosef who was a king in Egypt was the same Yosef who shepherded his father’s sheep and retained his righteousness.”

In order to understand Rashi’s comment, we must study the explanation offered by the Alter of Kelm, zt”l. When someone hears something he finds to be completely amazing, he repeats it again and again as an expression of his wonder. So too, the Torah, as it were, continues to repeat the wondrous fact that Yosef remained a tzaddik for so many years although he lived in Egypt, surrounded by intense impurity. That is why the Torah now repeats “and Yosef was in Egypt.”

In order to understand the wondrous stability of Yosef’s righteousness, we must examine the meaning of the word “hayah, was,” in the phrase “and Yosef was in Egypt.” The Gema-

ra in Brachos (13a) derives the rule that one may not recite the portions that comprise Shema Yisroel out of order from the pasuk (Devarim 6:6), “V’hayu ha’devarim ha’eilah, And these words [of Shema] shall be...” The Gemara derives this rule from the use of the word “hayu, and they shall be” to mean “And they shall be – they shall remain as they were at the beginning [the words of Shema should be read in their original order from beginning to end without deviation].” We therefore see that the phrase “And they shall be,” which shares the same Hebrew root as the word “hayah, was,” in the phrase “and Yosef was in Egypt” implies that the subject of the pasuk should remain as it always was. Chazal similarly derive that tefillin and mezuzos must be written in the correct order because of the word “hayu, and they shall be.”

This is the meaning of the Torah’s amazement about “And Yosef was in Egypt,” remaining exactly as he was before going into Egypt. His life followed the order he had committed himself to without any deviation.

Let us now understand Yosef’s nature when he descending into Egypt, which he retained despite the environment there.

In the house of Potifar, the Torah (Bereishis 39:3) says, “And his master saw that Hashem was with him,” which Rashi explains to mean that “the name of heaven was always in his mouth.”

The Midrash Tanchuma (Vayeishev 8) teaches that “when [Yosef] would go in to serve [his master], he would whis-

per, ‘Master of the world, you are my trust and my Father. Grant me grace, kindness, and mercy in your eyes, in the eyes of all who see me, and in the eyes of Potifar my master.’”

In every interaction Yosef had, we can see many more examples demonstrating that “the name of heaven was always in his mouth.”

When Yosef was tested by the temptation of Potifar’s wife, Yosef said (Bereishis (39:9), “And how can I do this very evil thing and sin against Hashem?!” The Midrash (Bereishis Raba 14:3) expands on that idea, stating that “[from Yosef’s faithfulness to Hashem with respect to the wife of Potifar] we see Yosef’s faith in [relatively] good times. How do we know that he was as faithful in hard times? As the pasuk (Bereishis 39:23) ‘The warden of the prison did not inspect anything that was in Yosef’s hand because he saw that Hashem was with him.’”

The examples continue.

Yosef said to the butler and baker in prison (Bereishis 40:8), “Do interpretations not belong to Hashem?!”

When Pharaoh asked Yosef to interpret his dreams, Yosef said (Bereishis 41:16), “It’s not me. Hashem will give an answer that will provide peace for Pharaoh”; (Id. at 24) “Hashem is telling Pharaoh what He is going to do”; and (Id. at 32) “the matter is ready to emanate from Hashem and He is hastening to carry it out.” Yosef even names his children based on his constant thoughts of Hashem. He named his older son Menashe, saying (Id. at

51), “Hashem has caused me to forget all of my toil and all about my father’s house.” In the following pasuk, he names his second son Efraim, saying, “Hashem has made me fruitful in the land of my affliction.”

In addition, even when Yosef had not yet revealed his true identity to his brothers, he told them (Bereishis 42:18), “I fear Hashem.” And after he had revealed himself, when comforting them regarding what they had done to him, he said (Bereishis 45:5), “Do not be sad or angry, because when you sold me here, Hashem sent me before you in order to sustain you,” and (Id. at 8) “And now, it was not you who sent me here but Hashem.” Finally, in his last moments of life, Yosef told his brothers (Bereishis 50:25), “Hashem will surely remember you, [and when He does], take my bones up from here.”

We therefore see that through his terrible trials and the heights Yosef experienced in Egypt, he remained exactly as he was in Yaakov Avinu’s house. He remained with all of his words and chapters in order. That is why the Torah repeats, in amazement, “And Yosef was in Egypt!”

Yaakov Avinu calls Yosef (Bereishis 49:26) “Nezir echav, the crown of his brothers.” The Hebrew word he uses for crown is nezir, but that Hebrew root word can also mean Nazir, one who takes a Nazerite vow to abstain from grapes and wine. The Torah (Vayikra 27:2) says about the Nazir, “When a person makes a wondrous vow...” The Ibn Ezra explains what

makes the Nazir’s vow so wondrous: “The word ‘wondrous’ is used because everyone runs after their desires but this person hems in his desires. Everyone else strengthens the nature with which they were born, but when one creates a new nature for himself, it is a wonder.” Therefore, Yosef, who never wavered in his total dedication to Hashem despite everything around him went against his nature, just like a Nazir does, by remaining exactly as he was before. This is a wonder, and that is why he was called “Nezir echav, the crown of his brothers.”

they call [Pharaoh] a “new king”?

Was this not the same Pharaoh?

Rather, the Egyptians said to Pharaoh: “Come, let us enslave this nation.” He said to them, “You

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returned him to the throne. That is why it says, “A new king was established...”

Whereas Yosef was someone who never veered from his values for a

His life followed the order he had committed himself to without any deviation.

Yosef’s Opposite However, everything in holiness has its opposite in impurity, as it says (Koheles 7:14), “Hashem created this in balance with that.”

The Torah says (Shmos 1:8), “A new king was established over Egypt who did not know Yosef.” The Midrash in Shmos Raba (Parsha 8) explains why he was called a “new king:” The Sages explain: Why did

are fools! Until now we belong to them. We eat their food. How can we enslave them? Were it not for Yosef, we would not be alive!” Because he did not listen to them, they removed him from his throne for three months, at which point he said to them, “Whatever you want to do, I am with you.” They then

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minute, Pharaoh was just the opposite.

He buckled in the face of pressure and compromised his basic sense of gratitude in order to appease his people.

Perhaps this is why the pasuk say that Pharaoh was “a new king who did not know Yosef.” He did not know the wondrous way of Yosef, which is to uphold one’s standards and values re-

gardless of the environment. Instead, after three months of pressure, he became a “new king.”

Our world is no different from Yosef’s. Our own inner temptations and the outside world exert great pressure on us to follow every desire, to eat every food, to click on every link we see, and to read emails and text messages the moment they arrive and not a second later. But just like Yosef, the wondrous crown of his brothers, we too can remain as straight as we were when Hashem created us, as the pasuk says (Koheles 7:29), “Hashem created man straight.”

Each of us has the choice to be like Yosef or like Pharaoh. May we merit to make the right choices each day and multiply Hashem’s wonders in the world.

Rav Moshe Weinberger, shlita, is the founding Morah d’Asrah of Congregation Aish Kodesh in Woodmere, NY, and serves as leader of the new mechina Emek HaMelech.

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Parsha

in 4

Parshas Shemos

By Eytan Kobre

Weekly Aggada And Moshe was content to dwell with the man; and he gave to Moshe his daughter, Tzipora (Shemos 2:21) Why would Yisro, priest of Midyan, offer his daughter to Moshe as a wife?

R’ Levi said: the staff that was created during the twilight hours (on the first Friday night of Creation) was given to Adam in the Garden of Eden. And Adam gave it to Chanoch; and Chanoch to Mesushelach; and

Mesushelach to Noach; and Noach to Shem; and Shem to Avraham; and Avraham to Yitzchak; and Yitzchak to Yaakov; and Yaakov brought the staff to Egypt and gave it to Yosef.

When Yosef passed away, his house was plundered by the Egyptians, with the staff ultimately repossessed

by Pharaoh.

Yisro was one of Pharaoh’s sorcerers. He saw this staff, very much desired it, and took it from Pharaoh and planted it in his own home garden.

When Moshe Rabbeinu came to Midyan, he saw the staff in Yisro’s

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home garden. Reading the letters engraved on it, Moshe pulled the staff from the ground.

Yisro saw this and declared, “This is the man who is destined to redeem the Jewish people from Egypt!”

And that’s the reason he offered his daughter Tzipora as a wife for Moshe (Pirkei d’Rabi Eliezer, Chapter 40).

Weekly Mussar And his sister said to Pharaoh’s daughter, “Shall I go and call you a nurse from the Jewish women so that she may nurse the child for you?” (Shemos 2:7) Pharaoh’s daughter took the baby (Moshe) to many Egyptian women to nurse, but he would not nurse, for he was destined to speak with G-d’s Divine Presence (Rashi).

This is the source for the rule that a Jewish child should not nurse from a non-Jewish woman (Rama, Yoreh Dei’ah 81:7 and Biur HaGra ad loc.).

But R’ Yaakov Kamenetsky questions how the example of baby Moshe Rabbeinu could serve as the source for the general rule that a Jewish baby should not nurse from a non-Jewish woman. After all, Moshe Rabbeinu would not nurse from the Egyptian women only because “he was destined to speak with G-d’s Divine Presence” (Rashi). Since that is a condition that seemingly would not apply to the typical Jewish child, how can we derive a general rule from the unique example of Moshe Rabbeinu?

Yet, inasmuch as we do derive this general rule from the exceptional case of Moshe Rabbeinu, reasoned R’ Yaakov, it must be that, in essence, every Jewish child can achieve the spiritual level of speaking with

G-d’s Divine Presence. And that is an inspiration and a challenge. The inspiration is knowing our children have such limitless potential; the challenge, as parents, is to raise our children in such a manner that helps them realize that potential.

Weekly Anecdote And she bore a son, and he called his name Gershom; for he said, “I have been a stranger in a strange land” (Shemos 2:22) The Chofetz Chaim once visited the town of Chorkov to solicit charity for a pressing cause, especially from one particular wealthy man who was always generous when it came to such matters.

The wealthy man was overjoyed to receive the Chofetz Chaim at his stately home. He shook the Chofetz Chaim’s hand humbly, eagerly ushering him inside, where he led the Chofetz Chaim through room after room after room, each more opulent and furnished more lavishly than the prior one. Finally, they arrived in the tenth such room. There, the wealthy man bade the Chofetz Chaim rest while they discussed the charitable cause at hand. The wealthy man pressed a generous donation into the Chofetz Chaim’s hands and escorted him out graciously.

Several months later, the Chofetz Chaim returned to the wealthy man from Chorkov, seeking a donation for a different charitable cause. The wealthy man again received the Chofetz Chaim with open arms. This time, however, the Chofetz Chaim was only led through the first room into the second room. And while the wealthy man again made a generous donation, the Chofetz Chaim could

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not help but notice the opulent furniture stacked haphazardly cluttering the hallway.

“May I ask you,” said the Chofetz Chaim, “why you brought me into only the second of your ten rooms?

And why is your most lavish furniture stacked in the hallway?”

“Well,” the wealthy man explained, “since the last time you were here a few months ago, the Communists seized control of the town and commandeered many houses for their purposes. In my house, they seized the inner eight rooms. So I’ve had to move all my beautiful pieces of furniture from the rooms where they belong into the hallway.”

The Chofetz Chaim, satisfied with this explanation, thanked the wealthy man for his generous donation and departed.

As he returned to Radin, he told his attendant what had transpired.

“Once must learn from every situation. What I learned from my encounters with this wealthy man is

that a hallway is not the place for lavish furniture; lavish furniture belongs in a permanent room, where one intends to dwell.”

Seeing the puzzled look on his attendant’s face, the Chofetz Chaim continued. “This world is but a hallway to a real and permanent world – the World to Come. We should treat this world as the hallway it is. It is not meant for us to lay down permanent roots, as our stay here is transient.”

Weekly Halacha And he went out on the second day, and, behold, two Jewish men were fighting; and he said to the wicked one, “Why are you hitting your fellow?” (Shemos 2:13) As seen from Moshe Rabbeinu’s label for the Jewish man lifting his hand to strike a fellow Jew, one who hits another Jew – or even raises

his hand to do so – is called a rasha (Shulchan Aruch, Choshen Mishpat 420:1 and Pischei Teshuva ad loc.).

Others who qualify under halacha for the dubious status of rasha include, among others: • One who borrows money and wastes it needlessly, leaving the lender with no recourse (Shulchan Aruch, Choshen Mishpat 97:4).

• One who renders halacha rulings while unqualified to do so (Shulchan Aruch, Yoreh Dei’ah 242:13).

• One who litigates financial disputes in secular courts, rather than in a bais din, is referred to as “a rasha, as if he has blasphemed and raised his hand against the Torah of Moshe Rabbeinu” (Shulchan Aruch, Choshen Mishpat 26:1).

• One who tortuously interferes in another person’s business transaction by making a last-minute bid to break up an extant agreement between buyer and seller (“ani hamehapech bacharara”) (Shulchan Aruch, Choshen Mishpat 237:1).

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And the “rasha” moniker is not merely an insult; there are practical halacha implications for one deemed a rasha. From one example, from the verse, “Do not extend your hand with a rasha to be a wrongful witness” (Shemos 23:1), we learn that a rasha may not serve as a witness and one may not even appear with a rasha as a pair of witnesses (Sanhedrin 27a).

A rasha also may not be buried in the immediate vicinity of the righteous (Shulchan Aruch, Yoreh Dei’ah 362:4). (There are many other practical implications of being termed a rasha.)

The Weekly Halacha is not meant for practical purposes and is for discussion purposes only. Please consult your own rav for guidance.

Eytan Kobre is a writer, speaker, and attorney living in Kew Gardens Hills.

Questions? Comments? Suggestions?

E-mail eakobre@outlook.com.

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Think, Feel, Grow

So Ordinary, Yet So Unique

By Shmuel Reichman

A

n old man had the habit of walking along the beach every morning before he began work. Early one morning, he was walking along the shore after a big storm had passed and found the beach littered with starfish.

As he continued further down the shore, he noticed a small boy in the distance, picking up debris from the shore and gently throwing them into the ocean. As he got closer, he realized that this boy was actually walking amongst the thousands of starfish that had been washed up during the storm. As he came across each starfish, he would gently pick it up and throw it back into the ocean.

Amused, the man approached the child and scoffed, “Young boy, why are you doing this? Look at this beach. You can’t save all these starfish. You can’t even begin to make a difference!”

The young boy looked down, momentarily crushed. But after a few seconds, he bent down again, picked up another starfish, and with all his might, hurled it into the ocean. He then smiled innocently, looked up at the man, and replied, “I made a difference to that one!”

The old man looked at the boy, intrigued, and after a few minutes he joined him in throwing starfish back into the sea. Soon others joined, and within the hour all the starfish were saved.

Individuality vs.

Uniqueness This story is related to a fundamental question in Judaism. On the one hand, we all believe that we are unique and special. On the other hand, we sometimes struggle to experience our individuality, feeling almost lost in the crowd. If you’ve ever walked the streets of a crowded city, surrounded by thousands of people walking in different directions, you may have felt almost invisible, fading into the background. We live on a planet with over seven billion people; planet Earth itself is a speck in the universe. If our planet is so infinitesimally small relative to the universe, and within our planet, each of us is less than one in seven billion, how are we supposed to feel? How are we supposed to feel special and unique in such a world?

Adding to this quandary is the Torah’s conception of community. If everyone is unique and individually important, how can we understand the concept of unity and the need to work towards being part of something bigger than ourselves? Must we sacrifice our individuality and uniqueness for the klal, for the greater good of the community?

Many people feel as though Jewish life aims to remove one’s individuality and sense of self, replacing it with uniform commitment to Hashem and Klal Yisrael. What is the

deeper Jewish approach to this struggle and conflict between individuality and being part of something bigger than ourselves? Is there some way to balance between the two?

In order to understand the relationship between individuality and community, let us learn about the concept of structure and order based on the ideas of R’ Eliyahu Dessler.

Levels of Order Rav Eliyahu Dessler, a prominent 20th century Jewish thinker and author of Michtav M’Eliyahu, writes about three different levels of order.

The first is a practical form of order, where pieces simply come together in an orderly, organized structure. The second is where the pieces within a structure are organized in such a way that provides practical use and accessibility. The third is where the pieces within the structure come together so that the ensuing result transcends the sum of the parts. Let’s begin by explaining the first form of order.

The world we live in is structured and ordered. Anyone who learns physics, biology, or chemistry has gotten a taste of the beauty and sophistication of our world’s order. Every human being has an inner order, which allows our bodies to maintain homeostasis. The order of our world has many important implications and applications as well.

The second level of order is where the order is structured in such a way that it results in a practical, beneficial consequences. For example, a library is organized in such a way that allows you to have access to a tremendous amount of information, as the order facilitates accessibility.

As R’ Elchanan Wasserman famously asks, is it better to have 20,000 books or 20 books? While many are quick to say 20,000, the answer is not so simple. It actually depends: do you have an organizing index? If you have 20,000 unorganized books, you’ll have access to nothing. You won’t be able to find a single book.

If you have 20 books, you’ll at least have access to each of them. However, if you have a way of organizing the 20,000 books, then, of course, the 20,000 books are better.

The third form of order and structure is fundamentally different than the first two; it results when pieces come together and create something greater than the sum of its parts. It’s where the parts melt together into a oneness and meld into something which transcends the parts themselves. In neurobiology and physics, this would be referred to as “emergent phenomena.”

Take a radio for example; it is composed of numerous parts and components. Alone, these components are practically worthless, but when organized in exactly the right

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way, something emanates from these pieces, a radio signal. This is completely different from the first two forms of order. When a library is organized, you are still left with nothing more than the books on the shelves. This third type of unity, a unity which transcends the sum its parts, is a deep and fundamental topic. Let us delve into this topic in order to build a paradigm through which we can answer our original questions.

The Missing Piece When you look at a beautiful sunset on the beach, where exactly is the location of beauty? Is it the sunset? The reflection on the water?

The contrast of the beach against the sunset? It’s none of them, and all of them. Beauty is when seemingly contradictory and separate components somehow melt into a oneness, whereby they all bring out something transcendent from within all the other components. This is the deep truth behind physical and spiritual beauty.

The same principle applies to music. Anyone who plays an instrument knows that music is nothing other than a bunch of notes being plucked, one at a time. Each note by itself is not music; it’s just a sound. Music is when the notes are played in the correct sequence, at the perfect tempo, at the right pace; when the musician is able to form the notes into a melodious oneness, whereby the listener no longer hears the notes, only the tune. This is music.

The same is true of a symphony.

When you watch a symphony, there are so many different musical instruments, so many different musicians, each one playing their own unique notes. The beauty behind a symphony is when the hundreds of different musicians come together in such a way that all you hear is the symphony – not the violin, not the cello – but the symphony as a whole, as one.

Interestingly, in this third form of order, when a single piece from the structure is missing, the entire structure is affected; if a single screw on the radio is missing, the entire radio won’t work; if a single note in the song is missing, the entire melody is affected. However, if a single book is missing from the library, the rest

of the library will be just fine. This idea becomes most potently manifest by human genes and DNA. If a single chromosome is missing from an embryo, that child will grow up with extremely severe and unfortunate defects – just a single chromosome.

This is the deep explanation behind a strange halacha regarding a sefer Torah and mezuzah. If a single letter is missing in either of these, they are deemed pasul. Many are confused by this; they don’t understand how a single letter could ruin an entire sefer Torah or mezuzah.

However, based on our aforementioned explanation, it should begin to become self-evident. As the Ramban explains in his introduction to his commentary on Bereishis, the entire Torah is an interconnected sefer – it’s

We wish to be important, accepted, and cared about. We have a sense of unique purpose; we know that we were created for a specific reason; we know that we have talents and gifts that no one else in the world possesses.

On the other hand, we simultaneously understand that this world is not only about “me.” We are part of something infinitely greater than ourselves. Looking at the night sky, we can’t help but feel ourselves shrink into nothingness, realizing just how small we truly are. We are part of a plan, a grand cosmic story, which expands far beyond the borders of our own individual life. And strangely enough, we actually enjoy experiences where we melt into the background of something infinitely

We are part of a plan, a grand cosmic story, which expands far beyond the borders of our own individual lives.

one elongated shem Hashem. In other words, it’s a single organic entity.

People understand that a single missing chromosome can affect an entire human being; the same is true for a sefer Torah and a mezuzah. Since these are organic entities, even a single missing letter can deem the entire text pasul. The Rambam echoes this same idea when explaining that if one rejects a single word of the Torah, it is as if he rejected the entire Torah.

Synthesis This brings us back to our original question, wherein we find a conflict between our own individual sense of uniqueness and the fact that we are part of something bigger than ourselves. On the one hand, we each have a deep desire to be unique, to stand out. It’s sometimes referred to as the “lone ranger” syndrome. We want to be the hero, the superstar, to have the spotlight shine solely on us as we save the day. We want to be seen, heard, and understood.

bigger than ourselves. If you’ve been to a spiritually stirring kumzitz, with the lights off and the musical playing, you know how spectacular it feels to be nothing, to neither be heard or seen as an individual, nor to see or hear anyone else. All you hear is the collective echoing of hundreds of voices pouring out their souls; all you see is shadows and oneness.

So which one is it? Do we prefer to be unique, to focus on our individuality and uniqueness, to stand out from the crowd? Or, do we prefer to be part of the crowd, to find ourselves sewn within the fabric of the klal, to hide within that which is infinitely greater than ourselves?

The ideal is to synthesize both.

To find your uniqueness within the klal, within that which is infinitely greater than yourself. To find your talent, your passion, you gift, and then wholeheartedly devote that to Klal Yisrael, to the world.

We need to ask ourselves: how can my uniqueness contribute to the Jew-

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ish people and the world as a whole?

Then, we must turn the focus of our life towards actualizing our unique potential, towards becoming the person we were meant to be. We must first take time to develop ourselves if we wish to have an impact on anyone else. Only once we become selfaware, work on our middos, learn Torah, and start becoming the best person we were meant to become can we then devote our newfound self to the klal.

We must determinedly search for our own uniqueness, but then strive to fully devote that uniqueness to the klal, to that which transcends our limited selves. Our true greatness lies in finding our greatness within that which is greater than ourselves.

We mustn’t think of ourselves as a meaningless starfish hidden amongst the masses, an unimportant soul lost in the crowd. Each of us is unique, each of us important – but our true importance lies within the deep understanding of how we can fit into that which is greater than ourselves.

The Mishna in Avos says that we must each consider as if the world was created for us. The deep explanation behind this is as follows: each of us plays a unique role in this cosmic symphony we call life. Just as every screw in the radio is fundamental, and a single missing screw renders the entire radio obsolete, so too, each of us is fundamental, and without us, the story of our world wouldn’t be complete.

Each of us is a letter in the ultimate sefer Torah, a word in the story of life. We must write our own story, with the recognition that our story is part of a bigger story, his-tory, our story.

Shmuel Reichman is an inspirational speaker, writer, and coach who has lectured internationally at shuls, conferences, and Jewish communities on topics of Jewish thought and Jewish medical ethics. He is the founder and CEO of Self-Mastery Academy (ShmuelReichman.com), the transformative online course that is revolutionizing how we engage in self-development.

You can find more inspirational lectures, videos, and articles from Shmuel on his website, ShmuelReichman.com.

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World

Builders

Thank You For My Life

By Yankee Weinberg

The scene of the accident

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n Thursday evening, August 24, 2017, I was waiting at a traffic light at the Plugot junction where Highways 35 and 40 meet just outside of Kiryat Gat on my way home. I was making a lefthand turn and was waiting for the light to change. While I was waiting, a woman dressed in uniform crossed the street on the opposite side and was hit by a fast-moving car. She was thrown completely across the intersection and landed right near where I was standing with my ambucycle.

After witnessing the accident, I turned on my lights and sirens and parked right behind where the woman landed so as to protect her from other vehicles on the highway.

I opened my med kit and began treating her. I called dispatch and alerted them to the incident, telling them to send a mobile intensive care unit and other responders. I stopped the arterial bleeding, attached her to high-flow oxygen, immobilized her and attached a C-collar, and applied bandages where needed. I treated her alone for a few minutes, stabilizing her condition until other volunteers joined me. Eleven minutes later, the ambulance arrived

Yarden, far left, and Yankee, speaking at the event

and joined the effort to save her life.

For me, it was pretty intense to see the accident occur right in front of me – especially a serious accident with such force. Something like that you don’t forget. But it did fade a bit as time went on.

Last Sunday, I was heading to the Aggadata event hall near Kiryat Gat to see if it would be a fitting venue

the logistics.

I met with the event planner of the hall, a young woman named Yarden. Yarden told me that she is very grateful to United Hatzalah because one of its volunteers saved her life in a serious car accident two years ago and that the volunteer arrived at the scene of the accident in less than 10 seconds. I looked at her and asked her if she was the woman

“It is because of volunteers like yourselves that I am standing here today, alive, to be able to serve you dinner.”

for our bi-monthly meetup of all of the volunteers in our chapter. United Hatzalah requires all chapters to hold educational meetups and events honoring and saluting the volunteers in each region every two months or so. As Deputy-Head of the chapter of Kiryat Gat, it is my responsibility to deal with a lot of

involved in the accident at the Plugot interchange. She replied in the affirmative. I was dumbstruck for a moment.

“I’m the volunteer EMT who treated you. I had no idea that you were alive.” I told her.

Now it was her turn to be silent with her mouth agape. Eventually,

she answered: “I am alive. Thanks to you,” she told me as both of our eyes welled up with tears.

Needless to say, we held the event at that hall, and we even called her up on stage to honor her and have her tell her story.

“The doctors told me that I wouldn’t have survived had it not been for the initial treatment I received at the scene,” she told the crowd on Tuesday during the event.

She then showed the audience the movie of the incident which she received from the police who took it off of the traffic cameras. “It is because of volunteers like yourselves that I am standing here today, alive, to be able to serve you dinner. I have no other words to say except thank you for my life.”

I have been an EMT for years.

Countless times I have dropped everything to rush out to medical emergencies. I’ve missed family events, business meetings, even time with my children. In that instant on Sunday evening, when I remet Yarden in the event hall, alive and well, it reminded me once again of how important and worthwhile the work that I do is as a volunteer EMT.

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just Another Protest or the Beginning of a

Revolution?

By Tzvi Dear

Population unrest and mass protests are nothing new in Iran. They normally have a “jack in the box” quality to them – although they pop up with great force, they are smothered with greater power. Whether or not this current iteration of mass protests will suffer the same fate remains to be seen.

T

he Islamic Republic of Iran is a hybrid of religious dictatorship and competitive elections.

According to Akbar Ganji, a dissident Iranian journalist, “The regime generates its own opposition, see-sawing back and forth between conservatives and reformists.” Why would a repressive regime generate its own opposition?

Perhaps to control and manipulate protests.

Revolutions and protests have historically been a recurring theme in Iran and have often been used by those in power to achieve their desired outcomes in a roundabout way. In 1963, Shah Mohammad Reza Pahlavi started the White Revolution which pitted the peasant class against the middle class. The revolution’s platform was to

create more fairness through creating more liberal social and economic policies which would advantage the peasant class. However, the consensus is that the Shah created this revolution in order to make the working class an ally and to thwart the threat to his power from the middle class.

Although the Shah’s plan worked for several years, he was eventually ousted from power himself sixteen years later during the 1979 Revolution.

It was the 1979 Revolution which created the two-headed monster that is now the Iranian government. Under the Shah, Iran was socially liberal and a secular state. Religious clerics were largely banned from serving in government roles, and there were numerous restrictions on public religious observance. In 1979, Iran’s secular intellectuals – who were fed up with the Shah’s economic policies – joined forces with the Islamists to rid the country of the Shah. Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini, an exiled Islamic cleric, became the face of the revolution and triumphantly returned to Iran two weeks after the Shah and his family had fled the country, deeming the revolution a success.

But then a natural schism arose – the secular intellectuals wished to create a western democracy; Kho-

meini and his throngs of religionists wanted a theocracy based on Islamic religious laws. Political compromises were made. But in an effort to establish himself as the undisputed leader of Iran, Khomeini pulled a move that has been repeated ever since in Iran: he turned the masses against America. He whipped up anger at the United States for its refusal to extradite of the Shah, who at that time was undergoing medical treatment in the United States. Eventually, protesters loyal to Khomeini stormed the U.S. Embassy and took all of the embassy’s personnel hostages. This allowed Khomeini to establish himself as an “anti-imperialist” and brought him further support. Within a short time, Khomeini succeeded at forming an Islamic republic, which was a religious government based on Khomeini’s vision of Islam and which heralded him as the supreme leader.

S

ince that time, although the Iranian government has played homage to elections, the government has remained broadly authoritarian.

However, perhaps due to the crumbs of democratic government that exist and the fading memories of what Iran

was like as a secular state before 1979, not all Iranians are on board with the current totalitarian theocracy. There is a strong movement of people, known as “seditionists,” who believe in the predominance of elected institutions over unelected religionists.

The seditionists are not merely a small minority in Iran. In 2009, millions of Iranians took to the streets to protest the fraudulent results of the presidential elections which Mahmoud Ahmadinejad “won.” The protests came to be known as the Green Movement or the Persian Awakening.

They reached their apex when up to 3 million peaceful demonstrators turned out on Tehran’s streets with the simple slogan: “Where is my vote?”

Although the election results were the catalyst for the protests, on a more fundamental level, the demonstrations were aimed at the repressive regime’s rampant violation of human rights. The protestors were fed up with restrictions on freedom of expression and association, religious and gender-based discrimination, and the frequent use of the death penalty, including on juvenile offenders and those with alternative lifestyles.

The Green Movement’s protesters gave up Iran’s traditional chant of “death to Israel” and “death to Amer-

ica,” preferring to engage in chants such as “death to no one.”

For a moment, it seemed like the Green Movement was the precursor of the Arab Spring, which took place a year later and eventually toppled numerous repressive Islamic regimes.

The protesters turned to the world for support. Specifically, they wanted the backing of the United States’ new internationally popular president, Barack Obama. Their chants included calls for Obama to support them, such as “Obama, you are either with us or with them.”

Obama publicly downplayed the prospect of real change and posited that the leaders that the protesters supported did not represent fundamental change. Rather than lend support to the grievance of the election having been fraudulent, Obama made a tepid and counterintuitive statement. “The world is watching and inspired by their participation,” he said, “regardless of what the ultimate outcome of the election was.”

His limp statement of support was seen as a slap in the face to the protesters who made the election being fraudulent their main selling point on the international stage.

As to why Obama broke with American precedent of supporting democracy seekers and failed to support the protesters, in his book, The Iran Wars, Wall Street Journal reporter Jay Solomon details how Obama avoided helping the Green Movement because he feared the demonstrations would sabotage his secret outreach to Iran and his goal of reaching a nuclear deal with the repressive regime.

Solomon discloses that, behind the scenes, Obama overruled advisers who implored him to show support for the protesters in order to facilitate a transition from dictatorship to democracy in Iran.

“Obama from the beginning of his presidency tried to turn the country’s ruling clerics from foes to friends,” writes Solomon.

Hillary Clinton, who was Secretary of State at the time, has since expressed her regret about the U.S. failing to back the Green Movement.

By early 2010, the regime had quashed all public displays of opposition. Iranian police systematically arrested leaders of the movement and

subjecting them to torture and kangaroo courts. The government killed at least 30 people and zealously detained thousands, including dozens of leading government critics and human rights lawyers, whom the government held without charge, many of them in solitary confinement.

A

lthough the Green Movement was crushed, protests in Iran have sprung up from time to time and have increased in recent months. Each time such protests erupt, the question becomes whether this protest will snowball into Iran’s Arab Spring and lead to a regime change or whether the demonstrations will once again

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is efforting to stoke protests, in the hopes of ‘getting the big one going.’”

Feeling squeezed because of U.S. economic sanctions on Iran, the Iranian regime raised gasoline prices fifty-percent last November. That, and other economic hardships, led to demonstrations across Iran. The regime responded by killing hundreds of people and detaining thousands, according to international rights organizations, opposition groups, and local journalists. Protests such as that recent one and the ensuing human rights violations by the Iranian government have been viewed as little skirmishes in that grand scheme of things that won’t lead to change in the dynamics on the ground.

But the events of last week – Iran

“We are not citizens.

We never were.

We are captives.” be stamped out by heavy boots.

In a 2018 opinion article in Newsweek, an Iran expert declared, “Obama abandoned the Iranians when they fought for freedom – Trump must not do the same. One tenet of Trump’s foreign policy can certainly be said to be: do the opposite of whatever Obama did. As such, given the chance, Trump would certainly back the protesters. In fact, indications are that through his economic sanctions on Iran, Trump

shooting down a plane departing from Tehran Airport while attempting to lob missiles at U.S. forces in Iraq – have reignited the protests and have given them a different shade and feeling. According to IranWire, a site for Iranian citizen journalists in exile, “The shooting down of the passenger plane is already being billed as Iran’s Chernobyl moment, the 1986 disaster in the Soviet Ukraine which exposed all the incompetence, state deception,

and rot in that regime. The plane crash saga has done the same for the Islamic Republic.”

Truthfully, the protests and the aftermath of Tehran’s downing of Ukraine International Airlines Flight 752 possess eerie similarities to the Chernobyl disaster in 1986: denials from the regime, attempted cover-ups, evidence from foreign powers, and then a reluctant admission from the government. What’s missing here, though, is someone from within making a decision to enact change. The only person with the power in Tehran to do so is Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei. Past experience has seen that he’d prefer to deal with protests with an iron fist as opposed to a willingness to bend to the people’s will.

A

t a candlelight vigil on Saturday to commemorate victims, protesters called for Supreme Leader Khamenei to step down. Familiar chants of “death to America” were traded for “death to the dictator” and “death to the liar.” In one video, demonstrators chanted, “Khamenei have shame. Leave the country.”

Without providing details, Iran’s judiciary said on Tuesday that it had arrested an undisclosed number of suspects involved in the accidental downing of the Ukrainian passenger plane that killed all 176 aboard. However, the protests have since expanded into a wider call for democratic reforms.

For now, Tehran has turned to its usual method of quelling protests: violence and manipulation.

A video circulated on Monday of anti-regime protesters helping a woman bleeding profusely after being shot

by Iranian police. One witness told the UK Guardian that “groups, many led by women, gathered in Tehran’s central Azadi Square on Sunday evening wearing masks and scarves to hide their identities, confronting riot police and officers in plain cloths,” and chanting, “down with this wilayat [Iran’s theocratic system of government]!”

In another video, which has since gone viral around the globe, crowds of people outside Beheshti University

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refused to trample over giant U.S. and Israeli flags that had been painted on the ground, possibly indicating that the Iran regime’s normal “change the target” tactic won’t work this time. In the past, Iranians had been happy to burn Israeli and American flags as a distraction for their woes and as a way to channel their anger.

“They are lying that our enemy is America, our enemy is right here,” one group of protesters chanted outside a university in Tehran, according to a video posted on Twitter.

President Trump, in Twitter messages written in both Farsi and English on Saturday, called on Tehran to allow human rights groups to report facts from the ground and warned the Iranian regime that the “world is watching.” He added, speaking directly to the Iranian people: “To the brave, long-suffering people of Iran: I’ve stood with you since the beginning of my Presidency, and my Administration will continue to stand with you.

We are following your protests closely

and are inspired by your courage.”

Whether these protests will mushroom into a revolution remains to be seen. For now, what’s blatantly missing is a leader and an organized effort by the demonstrators. Most of the protests so far have been spontaneous and a grassroots effort of many

groups drawn together under a common cause – but without a declared common ideology. Without a single leader or a unified, clear message, it would be almost impossible to topple the 40-year-old Islamic regime.

One thing that protesters have on their side is a possible turning of

conservatives from within the country who had previously supported the government. For example, the editor-in-chief of right-wing Tasnim news agency – which is tied to the Islamic Revolution Guards Corps – recently criticized Iran’s leaders for attempting to lie to the public. “Officials who misled the media are guilty too,” Kian Abdollahi said on Twitter. “We are all ashamed before the people.”

In that same vein, Iran’s most popular female actor criticized the government on Sunday, telling millions of Instagram followers that Iranians were “not citizens,” but “captives.”

“I fought this dream for a long time and didn’t want to accept it. We are not citizens. We never were. We are captives,” Taraneh Alidoosti wrote.

With raging protests, a disappointed people, and former supporters willing to vocally admonish the regime, it’s possible that Khamenei and his cohorts may have a harder time stuffing the jack back into the box this time around.

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Fun

BRINGING

BACK INTO YOUR MARRIAGE

T

his past week, my husband and I received three bar mitzvah invitations, one wedding invitation, an evite to my friend’s son’s vort, my other friend’s announcement about her newborn’s bris, and a reminder that my family is hosting a birthday party for my grandmother.

And that’s only the simchas that we’ve been invited to.

We also have to show up at the dinner at my neighbor’s children’s school on Tuesday since my neighbors are being honored this year. Oh, and one of our kids is getting his siddur next week.

We lead busy lives. And it’s not just me. We all have obligations and commitments that tend to overrun our calendar. And we’re grateful for the simchas and programs that our community enjoys and wants to share with friends and family. Between all those events, though, we also have obligations to work and family. There are dinners to make, homeworks to help with, carpools to drop off, and presents to buy for the grandchildren. We spend time with our kids when they come home from school so we can hear about their day and then spent time

with them at night while putting them to bed.

But missing from all this frenetic, important activity is one relationship that we tend to forget about: our relationship with our spouses.

We sometimes take our spouses for granted. Men oftentimes come home after a long day’s work with an expectation of a three-course dinner in a calm and serene home, with the children each concisely sharing how amazing their day was before marching off bed. Women are accustomed to their husbands waking early in the morning, providing for the family, and then heading out to a shiur or business meeting at night. It’s become routine: a “good morning” in the morning, a phone call to catch up during the day, and a “how was your day?” at night.

But it shouldn’t – and doesn’t have to – be this way. Your spouse is one of the most important people in your life.

Remember your dating days? It could have been last year or even decades ago. Remember it? Remember when you spent time together and enjoyed each other’s company? Remember the ice skating trip you went on or the time you went boating in Central Park? Remember that time the waiter

almost threw you out of the restaurant because, while you were lost in your conversation, you did not realize that the eatery was closing?

Yes, those were the days – but they don’t have to be in the past. You can make your marriage just as fun, exciting, and enthralling as it was when you first dated and got to know your spouse.

To paraphrase a certain slogan, you can make your marriage great again.

On Motzei Shabbos, February 1, you’ll be offered the opportunity and the tools to bring back that positivity and excitement into your marriage in a fun way.

The evening, a symposium called “Love & Laughter,” will be hosted by the UJA, the Jewish Women Leaders Council of the Five Towns, and the Gural JCC. Two noted experts in our community – Dr. David Pelcovitz, PhD, and therapist Rachel Pill, LMSW – will share their insights and their wisdom with the audience, ensuring an enlightening and informative evening. Rebbetzin Rookie Billet will be moderating the event. Participants will come away with tips on how to infuse their marriage with vitality and imbue the most important rela-

A LOOK INTO THE UPCOMIN G “LOVE & L A UGHTER” SYMPOSIU M

tionship in their lives with excitement.

Being that one of the themes of the evening will be tips on how to bring fun back into your relationship with your spouse, the event itself is certain to be fun and will feature internationally acclaimed comedian Ashley Blaker. With his wit and charm, Ashley will highlight just how fun and laughter are the cornerstones of a happy, healthy marriage.

DATE NIGHTS & MINDFULNESS In anticipation of this exciting evening, we spoke with therapist Rachel Pill about her insights into a healthy relationship with one’s spouse.

Rachel pointed out that every marriage – at every stage – can use doses of fun and excitement.

“Let’s talk about the positive – we need more simcha in our lives and in our relationships,” she says, adding, “People don’t have fun in their relationships anymore – and they should.

“This symposium is geared towards every age group. We’re going to talk about bringing the humor back into one’s marriage and making marriage into something lighter, more exciting. It shouldn’t be intense.

“We can talk about developing

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By Susan Schwamm

emotional closeness. Well, how do we do that? It’s possible that it’s harder today than before because of technology.

So let’s focus on that. Let’s talk about the five stages of marriage and the five love languages and what speaks to each couple. These are essentials and can help raise someone’s marriage up another level.”

Rachel imparts that date nights are essential for bringing the fun back into marriage. She knows that weekly date nights are not always feasible for couples but at least every other week a couple should make time for each other. It could be going out to dinner, taking a walk, or doing something creative.

“With my generation, years ago,” she quips, “a big ‘date night’ was shopping at Brach’s together with your spouse. We always ended up having a blast, and sometimes we did dinner before or after our shopping.

“It doesn’t have to be about costing a lot or even going out,” she notes.

“Find things that each of you like to do and take turns. Don’t just say, ‘Oh, on Thursday nights we always go to the same place, blah, blah, blah.’ Make it fun; be creative. You can play a board game or watch a show together. Every

couple can choose their own thing.

It’s about exclusively spending time together – and that will create extra closeness and make your marriage a lot more fun.”

Aside from date nights, Rachel recommends the book, The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It’s “life-changing,” she says.

According to the book, every person has a primary and a secondary way of expressing their love towards their spouse. For some, receiving gifts is the way that they know that their spouse is connecting with them; for others, quality time spent together affirms that their spouse loves them.

Your primary “love language” comes from your childhood – it was either something that filled you up or was a deficit that you needed to have filled at the time, Rachel notes.

Each person has to discover what their spouse’s “love language” is when connecting with their spouse. For example, if Sara’s primary love language is receiving gifts, she will be filled up when her husband, Avi, brings her flowers or buys her a necklace for her birthday. But if Avi’s love language is words of affirmation, he doesn’t feel filled when Sara buys him trinkets on her way home from work. He feels filled with she verbally expresses her love for him. The key to a wholesome, healthy marriage is understanding what your spouse needs to feel loved and to respond in that same “language.”

Rachel also notes that mindfulness plays a key role in being present and connected in our relationships.

The alarm on Rachel’s phone goes off three times a day. Each time the alarm sounds, Rachel says to herself: “What do I see? What do I hear? What do I taste? What do I touch? And what do I smell?” It’s become a habit by now that takes just 30 seconds to go through but it grounds her and keeps her in the present. After that, she verbally thanks Hashem for the good in her life.

This, she says, can be applied to marriages as well.

“I say to couples all the time: every morning, give each other a wish for the day, and every evening, say something you’re thankful for for that person for the day. Do it regardless of what else

is going on in your life.” She adds, “It keeps you grounded and focused on each other and on the good in your spouse.

“The more you can see the good in your spouse, and appreciate that good, the happier you’ll be in your marriage.”

THE JWLC’S DEBUT The Jewish Women Leaders Council of the Five Towns, one of the sponsors of the February 1 event, is a new and exciting concept in the Five Towns.

Around six months ago, Sepi Djavaheri, community mobilizer at the UJA-Federation of New York, approached a group of women in the community. Among them were rebbetzins, educators, doctors, professionals, and lay people who knew the community and wanted to help and enrich the life of those living in the Five Towns. Sepi, along with Stacey Feldman and Rachayle Deutsch of the Gural JCC, asked the women to brainstorm with ideas of how to make the Five Towns a more vibrant, cohesive community. There were numerous topics explored, and the council decided to focus on one topic for their first year: the topic of marriages and helping to develop and improve one’s marriage.

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The “Love & Laughter” symposium is the brainchild of the first few meetings that the council has held.

Those on the council include Suri Lenore Davis, Rachayle Deutsch, Dr. Deborah Dienstag, Rebbetzin Aviva Feiner, Stacey Feldman, Rebbetzin Malki Feigenbaum, Rebbetzin Debbie Greenblatt, Rebbetzin Nancy Hain, Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, Elisheva Kaminetsky, Rebbetzin Shani Lefkowitz, Rebbetzin Nava Orlian, Rachel Pill, Rebbetzin Tova Polakoff, Rebbetzin Paghit Ralbag, Shoshana Soroka, Leanne Taylor, Rebbetzin Sori Teitelbaum, Rebbetzin Malka Trump, Mindi Werblowski, Rebbetzin Myrna Weinberger, Debra Weinrib, Rebbetzin Chanie Wolowik, Myrna Zisman, and Rebbetzin Tzipporah Weinberger.

It is apropos that the symposium should be the debut event for the Jewish Women Leaders Council of the Five Towns. All the women on the council live in the Five Towns and Far Rockaway and love their community.

Each of them leads busy lives but felt that it was important to make their community an even better place to live. An event that focuses on imbuing fun and excitement into the most important relationship in one’s life is symbolic of the goal of the council: to help enhance the lives of those in the community.

“Love & Laughter” to be held on Motzei Shabbos, February 1 at Congregation Beth Sholom in Lawrence, NY, will be an entertaining evening geared towards married couples but open to all. Comedian Ashley Blaker, with his inimitable wit and humor, will be opening the event. Dr. David Pelcovitz, PhD, and Rachel Pill, LMSW, will be offering tips and insights to the audience on how to bring fun, excitement, and positivity into their marriage. Rebbetzin Rookie Billet will be moderating the symposium. Refreshments will be served.

Doors will open on Motzei Shabbos, February 1 at 7:45 p.m.; the program will begin promptly at 8:15 p.m. To limit distractions, there will be no admittance into the symposium during Ashley Blaker’s performance, which will start the program.

Although the symposium will be free of charge, reservations are encouraged to ensure a seat. Go to www.guraljcc.org/jwlc today to reserve your seat.

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Dating Dialogue

What Would You Do If… Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters

Dear Navidaters,

Thank you for considering my question. I always appreciate hearing the diverse wise voices on your panel.

I am going out with a really nice girl I’ll call Shira. There are many things I like about her. She comes from a great family, has a good personality, solid hashkafos that match mine, went to a great seminary, is pretty, super giving and fun. The problem is that she has an Instagram business. I don’t mean to put down Instagram businesses or people who have accounts, but once they jump over that bridge, I feel like they don’t come back. Once we started getting more comfortable together, she started asking me to take pictures of her in different outfits or if we are at a restaurant, she’d ask me to take pictures of her holding up certain dishes, and when we are at special places she will start a live or insta-story about it so she can post them. She does this all in the name of her Instagram business, even though a lot of it doesn’t have to do with what she actually sells. (Many times, she finds ways to tie it in somehow.)

She says it’s all about being “present” on Instagram; she says that lives and stories being displayed many times a day engages her clientele which means even if the pictures or daily stories have not much to do with her product, it’s good for her business.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to take pictures of her, but it makes me uncomfortable that so many pictures/videos/content about her, and soon to be OUR life (if I decide to propose), is and will be shared on Instagram. And then where does it end? Even if I do commit to her, will she actively display our kids and our vacations, things that I truly believe should be private?

We had open communication about it, and I told her how I feel. She keeps poo-pooing it by telling me I’m making a big deal about nothing, but it IS a big deal, to me. When she saw how serious I was about this as a concern, she hinted to possibly limiting her personal posts, but I don’t think I can bank on her changing for me. Am I just making a big deal about nothing? Do you think this is a valid concern?

Dovid

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions.

Our intention is not to offer any definitive

conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

The 29, 2020 2015 The Jewish Jewish Home Home || OCTOBER JANUARY 16, The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

The Panel The Rebbetzin Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S. our instincts are right. The issues of privacy, relentless self-marketing, and oversharing are a big concern for thinking people and especially Jewish ones who ponder Jewish values. The values of dignity, privacy refinement, and appropriateness get blurred in the name of promotion and building one’s brand and career. People tend to inflate the truth, become shrill and fake, and cross boundaries of self-respect, respect for others, and halacha when they are constantly posting and sharing all aspects of their lives. Branding practices for an Instagram business must be values-driven, not just market-driven.

Don’t be afraid to bite the bullet.

Think through these matters, read about what thinking Jews have to say about them, look at yourself in the mirror, and sit down and talk to your young lady directly. Have several discussions about these matters and hash them out.

My sense is that you will find yourselves far apart on core values, but you should not shy away from frank extensive discussion. You will become more comfortable at articulating your own values, trusting your judgment, and knowing yourself in the process.

The fact that Shira is poo-pooing your concerns in not a good sign. She does not appreciate your discomfort, values, and integrity. Asking you to photograph her during your dates and outings should tell you that you are less important than her brand. The fact that she is hinting at giving up personal posts without understanding your thinking tells you a few things, as well.

She wants this relationship to end with an engagement even though she doesn’t understand why you object. She doesn’t value your hashkafa, and she certainly doesn’t value your relationship if she has continued to post personal photos once you have gotten serious and discussions of privacy have already taken place.

Let Shira go after you talk further

Y

about these matters. She does not respect you, let alone share your values.

And do think about why you let things go this far. Grow from this experience and see shallowness and narcissism for what it is.

The Mother Sarah Schwartz Schreiber, P.A. ive years ago…

Five years ago, I would have advised you to do an about-face. With all her sterling qualities, Shira sounds like a Mega Insta-Yenta. She’s also a bit immature and insensitive to your privacy concerns. So, it’s “Bye-bye, Shira.”

Well, a new decade has dawned; and in today’s social-media-obsessed society, running a business without active internet presence may constitute commercial suicide. Shira may as well close up shop if she disappears from the web. She’s fully Instagram-invested, whether you sign on or not.

Your question, therefore, boils down to communication, trust and respect: three mainstays of a healthy relationship – no matter what age we live in. You’ve already made headway in the communications department.

You’ve told Shira about your privacy concerns and she (grudgingly) agreed to limit her personal posts – leaving them strictly business. (I know it’s possible. So many young, professional women are forever posting, tweeting, Insta-storying their fashion lines, personal training successes, and clients’ makeovers with nary a photo or mention of their spouses and children.)

But somehow, reassurances aside, you’re still not convinced. Which leads me to the other marital mainstays: trust and respect. If, even after your DMCs (deep meaningful conversations) you still don’t trust Shira to keep her word, it may be time for professional intervention to explore the two-way street of respecting each other’s needs and boundaries and learning to trust when they commit to you. Shira needs publicity to stay competitive while pro-

F

moting her business. You crave privacy, even if you’re married to an influencer.

The two goals can happily co-exist. A good therapist can guide you and show you the “Waze.”

The Shadchan Michelle Mond hat is an Instagram influencer, you may ask?

Remember those late-night infomercials on the HSN (Home Shopping Network)? Yup, those ladies decked out in fancy gowns claiming to be selling the most gorgeous pearls from the depths of the Pacific Ocean? “And you, too, can have an underwater genuine pearl from the depths of the Pacific for just 10 easy payments of $19.99!”

W

Being constantly bombarded with the highlights of everyone else’s life causes a person to question what’s wrong with their mundane life.

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Imagine turning on your smartphone to the most popular app (phone application) in the world, called Instagram, to shockingly see the following.

You, along with millions of other viewers, are about to see the same infomercial, but it’s not presented as an obvious commercial, rather, a snapshot of your personal family life – seen by tens of thousands. These video snapshots look so perfect that everyone who sees it then goes and books the exact same vacation (link in bio! *wink*). Only many do not process that your family, who have just been seen on Instagram, were paid and given free stuff (flights, luggage, hotel stay and pearl diving, for five easy payments of…ABSOLUTELY FREE!).

Why? Because your wife is an influencer. This means she has tons of “followers.” I know my wonderful grandparents in Queens are reading this and shaking their heads, still confused about how this is possible. So allow me to elaborate.

It’s basically the Home Shopping Network on everybody’s phone, only your shul friends are the ones selling the product. It is being sold in a way that the public followers see it on constant daily video updates of the person selling his or her own family. So if it is a commercial for the famous As Seen On TV “Snuggie” product (which is basically an oversized blanket sleeper for adults) you would see a video of your friend’s husband wearing his brand new Snuggie while sitting with his friends watching a baseball game.

And yes, tens of thousands of random people have actively chosen to “follow” her account because they either find it intriguing, funny, or merely followed the account to be entered into a raffle for a free wig.

So back to you, Dovid. If you choose to marry Shira, you must be prepared for the likely possibility that this will be your life. Never marry someone in the hopes that she will change. In a future episode of your life you can expect the possibility of the following: you turn on your phone to see your actual family, swimming in the depths of the Pacific Ocean, but oh, it did not start there.

First you see your entire family on line at the airport – decked out in matchy Longchamp luggage, then taking selfies with the Southwest Airlines flight crew, watching your wife selfie-video what an

amazing flight experience it has been while you gather your children to pick up the luggage. You continue watching and surprisingly get a quick tour of the 5-star hotel your family is staying in, room and all for the entire world to see.

The next installments of videos are the restaurants you are eating at with the family and the foods your kids are devouring (sans the meltdowns before and after each picture because those would not make great content). Finally, at the end of a long day, you see your family’s amazing trip pearl-diving – the wonderful genuine pearl from the depths of the ocean you have the honor of bringing home since the entire escapade was highlighted on her Insta-stories for thousands to see (marketing and advertising).

You will have all the perks of having a wife as an influencer, such as free stuff, free vacations, and free services, but it may just come at the price of your family’s privacy.

Mutual respect is the top requirement in a successful marriage. It doesn’t matter what hashkafa you share, what seminary Shira went to, or how much fun she is. If you do not respect her choice to be an Instagram star, things will all go downhill fast.

If you choose to propose to Shira you must make the cognizant decision ahead of time to share your entire life with not one but two beings: your wife and her Instagram followers. If this is not the life for you (which I completely understand and admire), Shira is not the wife for you.

Hatzlacha finding someone with amazing qualities whose life choices you respect and admire!

The Single Rena Friedman ovid, it sounds like you have a hard decision to make. Shira is a great girl who is shayach for you in many ways. You value where she comes from, who she is, and the similarities that the two of you share. There is one catch, though. Shira comes with a rather large piece of baggage: her Instagram business. You are on the cusp of proposing to her and have to make this life-chang-

D

ing decision. That is a lot of weight on your shoulders.

The introduction of social media into our lives has been both a blessing and a curse. The bracha is found where Klal Yisrael is able to raise large sums of money for tzedaka and access unfathomable amounts of Torah. On those very same platforms, we also find depression, anxiety, unrealistic expectations, and negative self-image.

Being constantly bombarded with the highlights of everyone else’s life causes a person to question what’s wrong with their mundane life. The line between private and public information is extremely blurred, if not non-existent.

Participation on these sites can be, and in most cases is, all-consuming and extremely self-centered. It is all about me: my outfits, my food, my location.

I have no idea where this ends and where Shira draws the line. She will no doubt actively display your children, your vacations, and your life on Instagram. You are not making a big deal about nothing and are extremely valid in your concern. You took the mature route trying to have an open and honest discussion with Shira about her social media use and your concerns regarding its play in your future together. You handled this extremely well. Shira took the opposite approach in poo-pooing it, telling you that it is not a big deal, and dismissing your valid concerns. She only hinted to possibly limiting her posting, but no real action was taken.

What you see is exactly what you get.

An aside to social media for a minute: regardless of what Shira thinks, it shows a lot about her character and middos to see her take a genuine and real concern of yours, and invalidate and not address it. That, to me, is an even bigger red flag than her Instagram account. As a married couple you are going to have to work through a lot of different challenges and stages in life where you will surely disagree. Here is a preview to navigating life with Shira.

Imagine what you would like your life to look like 5, 10, and 15 years down the road. How do you see the mother of your children interacting with them? Is it always through a camera lens? Are there fights over taking that eighth family photo to get the right shot? Are you constantly purchasing the newest and coolest items for your

When we feel seen and valued, we can work through a lot.

house to keep up with the trends? Are you fighting with Instagram over your wife’s attention? You are deciding what your future life will look like.

I would recommend that you think, perhaps journal, and sit with all of the information that you have gathered from dating Shira. See all of the pieces that come with her, the ones you really love and the ones that make you think twice. Sometimes it is better to take a short-term loss for a long-term gain. It is always extremely difficult to end a relationship where it feels like there is so much there.

You seem like a very mature, honest, and responsible person with your priorities straight and a good head on your shoulders. I am confident that you will make the decision that is best for you.

The Zaidy Dr. Jeffrey Galler ’m afraid you’re not going to like my answer.

But first, let’s make sure that you and our readers understand what “Instagram” is. Instagram is a computer application where users post photos or videos of themselves that their “followers” can access on their computers or smartphones.

People use Instagram for two different reasons: 1. Social purposes. Instead of calling 50 different friends and relatives, a user can post a photo with the message, “This is a photo of our family skiing in Colorado this Chanukah. How did your family celebrate Chanukah?”

2. Business purposes. People can make an awful lot of money posting photos on Instagram. They can advertise their own products: “Look at my

I

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015 The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

beautiful, hand-made tablecloths that I am selling this week.” Or, they can act as “Influencers”: “I put on XYZ makeup this morning, and look how nice and fresh it still looks twelve hours later while I’m on a date with my fiancé.”

The bad news is that it sounds like your girlfriend works as an Influencer.

That means that different companies pay her to influence her followers into buying certain products. These companies will offer money, depending on how many followers a person has. For example, they might offer, say, $10 per month for someone who has 100 followers, or $1,000

per month for someone who has 10,000 followers. Therefore, the business plan for Instagram commercial purposes is to try and get as many followers as possible. In order to accomplish this, a person has to constantly post photos and videos that they hope will be interesting, so as to attract more and more followers. And, “constantly” means many, many times every single day.

So, expect your girlfriend to post a photo of you and your family, while breathlessly informing her enthralled followers, “Remember when I said that I can’t wait to meet my boyfriend’s fam-

Pulling It All Together

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ily? Well, here we are, having dinner in my favorite restaurant.”

Unfortunately, the news for you, personally, is even worse. Millennials who are active on social media, are familiar with the derogatory term “Instagram Husband.” This refers to boyfriends or spouses whose almost full-time assignment is to take endless photos and videos of their girlfriend or wife, posing in different locations, with different outfits, in a never-ending quest to attract more and more followers with interesting, online content.

I know, this sounds like a nightmare scenario for you. But all this is predicated on the assumption that your girlfriend’s Instagram business is a large, hugely profitable enterprise for her. If, on the other hand, this is more like a minor

hobby that happens to generate a small income while providing her with personal satisfaction and personal gratification, there is hope for you.

If that’s the case, perhaps you can convince her to abandon her minor personal business aspirations, and, instead, take all of her formidable social media and computer skills and get a regular job as, say, a fund-raiser for some non-profit organization, or a job as a marketing specialist in some business entity.

Or, if she is a committed entrepreneur, perhaps she can start an online business that would not involve a constant need to post personal information.

Alternatively (and please don’t be insulted by this suggestion), if you, personally, are not currently making a good living, you might wish to join your wife’s enterprise and help manage the business with her.

Best wishes and good luck!

the other, relationships get stuck.

All the best, Jennifer

She also teaches a psychology course at Touro College. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 516-2247779, ext. 2. Visit www.thenavidaters. com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email thenavidaters@gmail. com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.

The Navidaters Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists

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hank you for writing in. Yes, you have a valid concern. A very valid concern, indeed. If you speak with anyone who uses social media to promote a business, they will tell you that the audience likes to see the face and life of the businessowner. To a large extent, Shira has to post to remain relevant and successful.

Relationships do not have to be ruined because of an Instagram business. What concerns me is that Shira did not validate your concerns about your life being posted on Instagram or that you are bothered taking pictures of her eating and posing and what this might look like in the future, re: an Instagram family.

This difference could be about anything, really. Instagram, politics, family, forms of entertainment…the important piece here is that both parties of a couple acknowledge and validate the other’s concerns and needs. And you

d id n’t get acknowledged or v a l id ated. That is what is of concern in my opinion. Will this lack of validation spread to other areas?

If you want to be with Shira, you will have to accept her business model and come up with some sort of compromise that values your need for privacy. And if Shira wants to be with you (think about that one) she will have to accept and honor your need for privacy.

When we feel seen and valued, we can work through a lot. In your next conversation with Shira, I suggest you bring up your needs and assess whether or not she makes you feel valued and important.

Your needs should matter to her, as should her needs matter to you.

When two partners feel valued, healthy and fulfilling compromises can be reached. Without valuing

Jennifer Mann, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and dating and relationship coach working with individuals, couples, and families in private practice at 123 Maple Avenue in Cedarhurst, NY.

Hi Readers!

Receiving your enthusiastic emails wanting to participate in the Reader’s Respond section has been wonderful! Just a reminder about how Reader Response works. Email thenavidaters@gmail. com with the subject line “Reader Response.” We will then ask you, in the order we receive your email, if you would like to respond to the coming week’s email. If you would like to respond to an already printed Navidaters Panel, please submit your answer to the editor at editor@fivetownsjewishhome.com. You can also join us on our FB page @thenavidaters on Sunday evenings to post your response to the week’s column. Interacting with you has been a pleasure! Thank you for all of your feedback.

Jennifer

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In The K

tchen

Salmon Quinoa Bowl

By Naomi Nachman

Ingredients 1 pound salmon fillet ¼ cup soy sauce ¼ cup mirin 2 garlic cloves, minced 4 TBS honey (divided) 5 scallions, sliced (divided) Black pepper 2 English cucumbers, thinly sliced 1 carrot, peeled and thinly sliced ¼ cup rice wine vinegar ¼ cup water 1 TBS kosher salt 2 cups cooked quinoa, warmed Sesame seeds

Preparation

Rice or quinoa bowls have become very popular in the last few years and have been making their way into kosher cookbooks, magazine articles, and restaurant menus. I have never been a big fan of rice, but I do love quinoa, so I replace the rice in my bowl with quinoa, which is also a little healthier, as quinoa is considered part protein and not just a full carbohydrate.

In a medium bowl, mix together salmon, soy sauce, mirin, garlic, 3 tablespoons honey, 3 scallions, and 1 teaspoon black pepper. Set aside to marinate.

Meanwhile, in a medium bowl, combine cucumber, carrot, and 1 tablespoon salt. Add vinegar, water, remaining honey, and remaining scallions. Mix until combined and chill until ready to serve.

Preheat a grill pan to medium-high. Once hot, remove the salmon from the marinade and place on the grill. Season with pepper and grill the salmon for about 3 minutes per side till cooked through.

Divide quinoa, salmon, cucumber, and carrot among four bowls. Sprinkle bowls with sesame seeds.

Naomi Nachman, the owner of The Aussie Gourmet, caters weekly and Shabbat/ Yom Tov meals for families and individuals within The Five Towns and neighboring communities, with a specialty in Pesach catering. Naomi is a contributing editor to this paper and also produces and hosts her own weekly radio show on the Nachum Segal Network stream called “A Table for Two with Naomi Nachman.” Naomi gives cooking presentations for organizations and private groups throughout the New York/New Jersey Metropolitan area. In addition, Naomi has been a guest host on the QVC TV network and has been featured in cookbooks, magazines as well as other media covering topics related to cuisine preparation and personal chefs. To obtain additional recipes, join The Aussie Gourmet on Facebook or visit Naomi’s blog. Naomi can be reached through her website, www.theaussiegourmet.com or at (516) 295-9669.

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Dr. Deb

What Exactly is Hate?

By Deb Hirschhorn, Ph.D.

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ate is building up oneself through putting down another.

The focus of attention is oneself. It will seem like the object of expressing hate is the other person, but it isn’t; it’s oneself.

When we put someone else down, we are drilling into ourselves – not them – their lack of humanity.

When we concentrate ourselves on the lack of humanity of the other, it gives us permission to mistreat them further.

Mistreating the other is a way of self-soothing. When we reduce the other to less-than-human, we commiserate with ourselves for the misfortune we have of having them in our life.

This is true of lower degrees of hate which “simply” include name calling and put-downs. The reality is that it all goes into the same basket.

But notice that the entire focus of these acts is ourselves. Ourselves as immutable. It’s never to correct ourselves or reflect on being a better person. It is always on validating our rotten feelings and even worse behavior. Thus, the feelings-behavior-feelings cycle is never-ending.

We cannot get out of it since we repeat the same step each time we go around.

This is the age-old method that any totalitarian regime has used to de-value its citizens. “You swine!”

Sure, that makes the people hearing it feel demoralized, frightened, angry, and invalidated. But

the Nazis did it for their own benefit. When they called us swine, it permitted them to go further in their dehumanizing acts. To do what they did, they needed to see us as swine.

The same thing is happening today, in our world.

By calling Trump names, it permits those who don’t like his hairdo to attempt to get him unseated from his position. And they feel completely justified.

The secret word that people use that gives them so much power is “is.” When someone “is” bad, the “is” defines them. So all we have to do is call them some bad thing, and then they “are.” Which gives the speaker the right to do anything required.

Anything. Any dehumanizing thing.

This is no different in the privacy of our homes.

That is why name-calling and put-downs are so dangerous. Not only do they hurt the recipient.

Not only does it make the recipient wonder who he/she is after a while.

Not only does it lower the recipient in their own eyes, but even worse – the very act of labeling the other person permits you to do anything you think is right and necessary to them. Not “right” in the sense of good and ethical, but in the sense of what’s needed to get rid of such vermin.

It’s a license to be degenerate yourself.

So what is hate? It’s the act of thinking badly of the other person so that it permits you to act in ways

you wouldn’t otherwise act towards them and feel guilt-free doing it.

When you focus on the putdowns as if they represented the entire person, you’ve dehumanized them in your own eyes. That’s hate.

Dehumanization is the act of taking away the nuances of what makes a person human – the good, the bad, the not-so-clear.

Now, here’s a question, just in case you can recognize yourself in this description: Is this who you want to be? A person who allows themselves to do ugly things because the individual you’re doing it to is so beneath you, so beneath humanity, that it’s okay?

I didn’t think so.

Here is the way out of the mess (and I know it is very hard when you’ve gotten used to being in this frame of mind): force yourself to see the positive. The positive is absolutely there. This person is not only “lazy” or “a slob.” This person is also kindly to others, friendly, and well-meaning.

See the good. Search for it.

Search for their humanity.

If you just can’t, ask yourself how others see this person. See what they see.

Sometimes the good is hidden because they’re afraid to show it; they’re afraid of being vulnerable and they mistakenly think that by hiding what’s soft, thoughtful, or generous about themselves, they are protected.

That’s incorrect thinking.

When we put up a tough façade,

what we’re really doing is giving our partner (who is acting more like an opponent) a ready excuse for putting you down and acting badly. After all, you are this ogre yourself.

But if you’re the one dishing out the hate, it really doesn’t even matter whether the other person deserves it or not. Because you don’t.

You don’t deserve to degrade yourself to that level. No one does.

No one should. You’re better than that. You also don’t deserve to live in that ugly place with the negative boiling up inside of you constantly.

That’s no way to live; it’s not even living.

In fact, I challenge you to search for the good in the absolute worst person in your life, the one who is making you crazy. Search for the good. Don’t buckle under to the false joy of flinging hate. It is not worth it.

And it turns out not to be so joyous either. As history can tell you.

Yes, there’s a tremendous release when you let it all out. Don’t become addicted to that one moment. It’s not worth it.

It’s far better to figure out why this one person or their particular behavior triggers you in this way.

Maybe it’s you and not them. And see the good. That’s the main thing.

Dr. Deb Hirschhorn is a Marriage and Family Therapist. If you want help with your marriage, begin by signing up to watch her Masterclass at https://drdeb. com/myw-masterclass.

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Health & F tness

More Than Just Weight Loss

By Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN

E

ating healthy isn’t all about losing weight. Although most people assume that the main reason for seeing a dietitian would be to lose weight, there are many other reasons. For those suffering from chronic illness such as diabetes, heart disease, or renal insuffi-

ciency, a dietitian helps to create a meal plan that will best prevent further complications and that is safe for their conditions. For those with celiac disease or Crohn’s disease, a dietitian can help them devise a gluten-free diet to alleviate pain and their symptoms. Those with

allergies and intolerances require a specialized diet as well, which may require the help of a dietitian. But would you believe this? Some people actually visit a dietitian to gain weight!

Weight struggles begin at a very young age. As soon a baby is born, a mother has to decide whether to breastfeed her baby or give him or her formula. Once that is established, there is always a concern: is my baby eating enough? Is my baby gaining enough weight? What percentile is my baby in? In addition to hoping that our baby is gaining weight appropriately, we also want our babies to be well-fed so that they sleep well! But life gets more complicated than that.

Once our babies are old enough to eat solids, we begin introducing new foods slowly. As our babies grow, we begin to differentiate which foods they like better and tend to give them more of those foods, while still introducing new foods to widen their repertoire.

However, once a child reaches a certain age, they begin making the demands, and unfortunately, more often than that, we have no choice but to give in to our toddlers. Some might consider this enabling our children to become picky eaters by allowing them to decide what or when they will eat.

Allowing your children to make decisions is not a bad thing; it breeds independence. However, the problem may escalate if your child

is only eating a few foods or not eating enough. A lack of variety of foods and insufficient intake may cause inadequate nutrition and inadequate weight gain. Your doctor might advise supplements such as Boost or Pedialyte. While supplements are helpful, it is also essential to attempt to widen your child’s palate. It might not be so simple to convince your child to try to new foods or eat more of the foods that he/she is given. Nobody said manipulating a toddler is easy, but it important to keep working on trying to expand their food choices to promote optimal nutrition. With the guidance of a dietitian, you can choose nutrient-dense yet kid-friendly food to improve your child’s diet.

Once we’ve mastered that, we hit the next bump in the road: adolescents. Peer pressure, self-image, self-esteem, cliques, and expectations can strongly influence a teenager’s eating patterns. Eating disorders are a big problem, particularly among adolescents. Some teenagers choose to be secretive about it, while with others, groups of friends all support one another in order to maintain a certain image. Either way is unhealthy. Whether it is excessive dieting, excessive exercise, laxative use, or vomiting, most eating disorders can be managed with the right help. Symptoms to look out for are fatigue, weakness, irritability, depression, and, of course, weight loss. Many times, the individual isn’t necessarily trying to lose

weight but is rather afraid of gaining weight. Often, the individual has a misconstrued self-image and does not see how skinny or sickly-looking they actually are.

The best way to help anyone with an eating disorder – whether it’s anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, and binge eating disorder – is to seek medical help. Often, he/she will require psychiatric help as well as medical help. Catching an eating disorder early is very advantageous.

First and foremost, he/she suffering from an eating disorder requires a lot of love, support, and attention.

One needs to be taught to let go of all negative thoughts and accept reality before they can start healing.

The individual must learn to love and respect themselves. Most importantly, he/she must agree to get help and be willing to change. Of course, it will not be easy, but he or she must desire to get better. With the right psychiatric help, a dietitian can help coach the individual about

eating properly and choosing the right foods without living in fear of weight gain. And one must always remember: no food will ever hurt you as much as an eating disorder will.

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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once again. Poor dentition and difficulty with swallowing require a soft diet, which many seniors don’t fancy. Certain ailments such as dementia, Alzheimer’s disease, and Parkinson’s disease may cause the

The key is finding the right balance.

As adults, many struggle to shed pounds that their body is tightly hanging onto. In addition, as we get older, our body changes, our metabolism slows down, and chronic diseases certainly play a role in our weight struggles.

Then, the stages of life come full circle. Many elderly individuals face nutritional challenges

individual to change their eating patterns due to the advancement of the diseases which results in weight loss and malnutrition. These diseases may cause the individual to have difficulty chewing, swallowing, or following basic eating cues, such as opening your mouth when the spoon of food is brought in front of your mouth. Yes, it is heartbreaking.

However, generally, with the teamwork of a speech language pathologist, dietitian, and medical doctor, the individual’s nutrition status can be managed.

Eating healthy isn’t all about losing weight. We each need to ingest the appropriate amount of food and the nutrients that our body needs to function properly. Overeating and undereating can each cause a significant amount of damage. The key is finding the right balance.

Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN, is a Master’s level Registered Dietitian and Certified Dietitian-Nutritionist.

She graduated CUNY Brooklyn College receiving a Bachelor’s in Science and Master’s degree in Nutrition and Food Sciences. She is currently a dietitian at Boro Park Center and a private nutrition consultant. She can be reached at CindyWeinberger1@ gmail.com. Follow us on Instagram @ EatBetterandFeelBetter.

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Health & F tness

“My Child Wants”

By Hylton I. Lightman, MD, DCH (SA), FAAP

T

nomenon is emerging. Allow me to explain.

Pediatricians are, for the most part, warm, friendly, kids-centric

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people. Not every child wants to come to the pediatrician’s office.

That’s normal, also for the most part.

So years ago, in order to make visits to our office “fun,” we instituted giving each child a sticker when the visit is finished. Our patients leave feeling “gifted.” There’s a wide array of stickers available – Frozen, Cinderella, Thomas the Engine, Peppa Pig, Star Wars. It seems like there’s a sticker for everything possible (and we proudly keep ours “G-rated”).

The rule has always been one sticker per child who has been seen. We relent a bit when asked if siblings have accompanied the patient. For the most part, children and their parents ask for a sticker and say “please” and accept the sticker with a “thank you.”

Lately, my staff and I are noticing a shift. What’s that?

First, some kids accept the sticker, look it over, and say they want something else. In the olden days, which seems like a few short months ago, children gladly took the stickers, said “thank you,” and left happy.

The other shift is parents are asking for more than one sticker and/or for stickers for the siblings at home. We explain to the parent that it is one sticker for each patient seen. The parent replies, “But his

sister is at home and will feel left out if she doesn’t get a sticker.” The front desk person states the rule (a new phenomenon – having to set and state parameters for sticker giving), and the parent rolls her eyes and says, “But it’s only a sticker.”

Mommy and Abba, you are so right. It’s only a sticker. But it is really something so much bigger.

Instead of focusing on the sticker, please think about the fact that there are rules in life wherever we go. Whether or not we like or even understand the rules should be immaterial. What matters is there are rules, which are in place so things run smoothly. This is called “policies and procedures.” No effective, meaningful entity – whether it’s a family, interpersonal relationships, school or yeshiva or seminary, restaurant, hospital, airline or anything – can function without them.

Businesses have employee handbooks because the terms for employment are clearly stated. People with Global Entry have one queue at passport control while those who don’t have it have another. Following rules ensures that missions are accomplished.

Rules have been thought through and have been thought out, despite what you think. Are they arbitrary?

Absolutely. Why? Because each being or unit or whatever makes the

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

rules as it deems fit and necessary.

You may not like them because it means that you may not necessarily get what you want, how you want it, when you want it. You may see it as punitive, a punishment designed and carried out specially made for you, when in reality, such is life. I’m sorry. It is your privilege not to like the rules. Disrespecting them is something else.

Respecting the rules is important as they tend to minimize chaos. Even more important, when we adults respect the rules, we role model for the younger ones in our lives the essentialness of rules.

Sometimes, it is better to bite your tongue and say nothing in front of your children. If you choose to have a discussion about the rules with whatever entity, do so privately and respectfully. No one says that everyone in the entity has to agree on everything. However, respect the rules and respect other people.

Dissing the rules means that your

PESACH 2020

children are learning how to diss your rules. An unpleasant picture might otherwise emerge, G-d forbid.

Kibbud av v’eim is the foundation of Yiras Shamayim.

As far as all the siblings at home

my oldest child gave birth in Israel, and I left my nine other kids for 10 days to go help her. It’s crazy that I left nine needy children at home because one child 6,000 miles away really needed me.”

It’s only a sticker. But it is really something so much bigger.

who are salivating for stickers – please. No two children get exactly equally all the time from each person in their lives. A mother of a large family recently became a grandmother to a baby boy in Israel. In her words: “Dr. Lightman,

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It’s not crazy. It is reality.

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chessed by learning the word “no” and adhering to it. Not every young frum Jewish man or woman gets into their first-choice yeshiva or seminary – and it is not the end of the world, despite however painful it is in the moment.

But no matter what, you always have to follow the rules. By doing so, may we raise generations of children who grow into functional adults who are mikadesh shem Shamayim in everything they do.

Hashem has given us a Torah with rules, regulations, and boundaries.

The purpose is to make us into a better, more functioning human being.

As always, daven.

Dr. Hylton I. Lightman is a pediatrician and Medical Director of Total Family Care of the 5 Towns and Rockaway PC. He can be reached at drlightman@totalfamilycaremd.com, on Instagram at Dr.Lightman_ or visit him on Facebook.

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Health & F tness

SUCCESS! How to Help Your Child Rise Above Life’s Challenges

By Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW-R

“I

can’t do it!”

“Sure, you can, honey.

You’re great at this.”

“I’m so dumb” “No, you’re not. You’re one of the smartest kids in you class – your teacher even told me so.”

Sound familiar?

Have you ever wondered: Why does my child think this? Where did she get that from? Why is she giving up so quickly?

Kids are not born with those beliefs.

In fact, it’s the opposite. Have you ever watched a baby learn to walk?

It’s really hard. First, the baby needs to pull herself up. Then she needs to learn how to balance on two feet. Then she falls and falls and falls again. Finally, she masters the ability to stand – but the challenge has only begun.

Now she has to move one foot forward.

This requires being able to balance on one foot while moving the other foot in front. She falls again and again and again but you’ll never see her give up.

She always gets back up.

Babies learn new things by observing the world around them. They are purely emotional beings. That means every time someone smiles at them or claps for them, they feel good. That good feeling propels them forward.

Children come into this world naturally wired to succeed, even if the task is challenging.

As a child matures, so does their ability to reason.

There is one thing that does not change. Children continue to learn through observation, but unlike a baby who learns through observation and feeling, children learn through observation, thought, and feeling.

Children are not just influenced by what they see, but also by what they hear and what they think. The thought that “I’m dumb” or “this is way too hard” – even when completely untrue – will destroy the ability to succeed.

Perception shapes reality.

It goes without saying that a child who grows up in a critical home will develop a negative outlook and bad feelings.

But what about children who are

constantly supported? How do they develop a negative view of themselves?

Children learn from example.

There is no greater role model than a parent.

While parents may be invested in supporting their children, they may not be as invested in supporting themselves. Parents who struggle with negative feelings and beliefs about themselves unintentionally impart powerful negative messages to their children.

When you notice emotional issues in your children, it’s time to take a hard look at your own emotional state and how your own emotions and beliefs impact your day-to-day activities.

A parent who puts herself down is in effect modeling how a child should relate to herself in a much more powerful way than all the positive statements the parent says to the child. If the child sees a parent being overly critical of him- or herself, that child will learn to be overly critical of himself as well. A parent who worries, even if she hides what she is worrying about, is sending the message to her child that there is what to fear or that things won’t turn out ok. These messages will then get generalized as to how your child relates to himself and the world.

We invest everything in our children, so much so, that we forget to invest in ourselves. Just like a parent traveling with a child in an airplane must put the mask on their face first and then their child’s, a parent needs to make sure that they are emotionally okay so that they can properly care for those around them.

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015 The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

Examine the way you think.

How do you perceive yourself and your abilities?

Are you critical of yourself?

Do you often hold yourself to incredibly high standards, only to fall short of meeting your own expectations?

Do you worry a lot?

Do you give up when something seems impossible?

Do you use negative language to describe your experiences?

Focus on ways to change the negative perceptions that you have.

By challenging overly critical and self-defeating thoughts, your child will begin to do the same. When your child sees you developing a positive, optimistic view of yourself and the world around you, your child will follow suit.

The earlier you start, the greater the chance of preventing your children from developing a negative perception of themselves and their world around them.

How can a parent help their child?

• Set a good example.

• Highlight difficult tasks, overwhelming situations and mistakes and model positive, self-motivating thinking.

• You can say something like: “There is so much to do; I’ll just take

and challenge self-defeating mindsets and negative feelings, then outside intervention may be warranted. Parents are far quicker to put their children into therapy than themselves, but that is oftentimes a much less effective approach. A child may need therapy to

There is no greater role model than a parent.

it one step at a time and do the best I can” or “This is really challenging, but if I keep trying I’ll get it.” Then show them how it’s done. You may fail, and a different course of action may be warranted. That’s OK. What’s most important is that the child witnessed a can-do attitude and a parent who is confident in themselves.

If you find it too difficult to identify

help them with strong negative emotions or disruptive behavior, but by getting help for yourself, you may be able to drastically cut back on how much help your child needs. Plus, you will be much better equipped to help your child successfully navigate his emotional struggles.

Your child may have to fall and get up again and again – but he won’t give

up. He won’t believe he is a failure or incapable. He will eventually succeed.

With a negative mindset a baby would see everyone else walking around and the narrative would be, “If everyone else can do it and I keep falling, there must be something wrong with me. I’ll never be able to walk.”

That baby would give up and never learn to walk. But a person with a positive perspective says, “If everyone else can do it, so can I.” Fortunately, babies naturally have a positive perspective. Look at how much they learn and accomplish in the first two years of life! With curiosity, joy, and feeling pride in every baby step – they keep trying until they get it.

Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW-R is a licensed psychotherapist with a private practice located in Cedarhurst, NY. Rachel treats adults, adolescents, children, and families, and provides parent coaching. She can be reached at 347-673-1953 and at rachel@investintherapy.com. Visit investintherapy. com to learn more.

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JANUARY 16, OCTOBER 29, 2020 2015 || The The Jewish Jewish Home Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Notable Quotes “Say What?!”

What…were they thinking about in Albany when they crafted this mind-boggling set of limitations on the criminal justice system? They did not ask a single judge, a single district attorney, a single police chief in the state to comment on this most significant criminal justice reform in the history of New York. And now we are left to pick up the debris that it’s going to create.

- Former New York City Police Commissioner William Bratton on AM 970 with John Catsimatidis

I’ve put my arm around my brother all our lives and I can’t do that anymore… I’m sad about that. All we can do, and all I can do, is try and support them and hope that the time comes when we’re all singing from the same page. I want everyone to play on the team.

- Prince William, talking about his brother Prince Harry abdicating, in an interview with Sunday Times

Dear Dukes, you can look for your first job without giving up the crown. If you’re looking for a job, we have a new crown for you.

We found out that the prince and the duchess decided to give up their roles in the royal family and will work to become financially independent. So, we have a proposition for you: do as thousands of people and take your first steps in the world of work with us. You know that the crown will suit you perfectly. Also, after so many years of living as dukes, it is time for you to start eating like kings.

I didn’t realize that I had said the word “thugs,” but my staff told me later I did and so I must have said it. I meant to say slugs – as in slow-moving. We weren’t playing hard before, and now we were playing harder. I meant it as a compliment. That’s what I was trying to say.

– Cleveland Cavaliers coach John Beilein, after he called his players a “bunch of thugs”

The guy who threatened another Holocaust of our people, and who had the means to try to carry it out, is gone. I hope that’s ok with you kids.

- Washington Examiner executive editor Seth Mandel responding to Time Magazine’s “Guide for Kids” about the killing of Iranian terrorist Gen. Qasem Soleimani, with his own “guide for kids”

- Ad by Burger King

Tell him I’ll call him back.

It would be my intention to go. I went to the one game in San Francisco. We watched all together the second game in Seattle. I have, unfortunately, responsibilities to save our country from peril this weekend.

- House Speaker Nancy Pelosi when asked last Thursday if she was planning on attending the 49ers playoffs game

This airplane is designed by clowns who, in turn, are supervised by monkeys.

- One of the recently released internal messages in Boeing Corp. that raised serious questions about the 737 MAX that was grounded in March after two fatal crashes

- House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, when an aide handed her a note in a meeting that Vice President Mike Pence was on the phone to notify her that Iran had launched missile attacks against at least two U.S. military bases in Iraq

Forgive me that I got to know this late. And forgive me for the 13 years I told you lies.

- Iranian state TV anchor Gelare Jabbari announcing on Instagram that she quit her job after the Iranian government lied about shooting down the Ukrainian airplane

MORE QUOTES

The Jewish Jewish Home Home || OCTOBER JANUARY 16, The 29, 2020 2015

99 27

These threats of war crimes & mass murder

by Iran make this the most dangerous night in history of American military in the Middle East and the President of the United States has no idea what to say. White House says Trump won’t make a statement. He’s literally speechless.

- MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell, last Tuesday night as Iran tried to lob 15 missiles at Iraqi bases holding American troops after they had warned everyone to leave the bases and which resulted in Iran shooting down a plane leaving their own airport, killing all the passengers onboard

If you went to bed early Tuesday, you were surprised to wake up Wednesday and learn that World War III has been delayed. No doubt you were also shocked that Iran blinked, oil prices were tumbling, and the stock market was soaring. Once again, the Chicken Little chorus got everything all wrong. The sky isn’t falling, and Donald Trump pulled off a huge victory.

Oh, and he’s still president.

– Michael Goodwin, The New York Post

[The] greatest way to break a [expletive] billionaire of their privilege and their idea that they’re superior – go and break rocks for 12 hours a day. You’re now a working class person, and you’re going to [expletive] learn what the means, right?

Over the last week, the president has put on a clinic in seeking peace while projecting strength. Just don’t expect to find the outcome described that way in The New York Times or on CNN.

- A paid Bernie Sanders staffer talking to an undercover investigator from Project Veritas, whom he believed to be a fellow Bernie supporter

- Ibid.

- Ibid.

I had thought of it but it requires so much concentration. I take my hat off to vegans who can handle it, who manage to avoid all nonvegan products. I mean, you can’t eat cheese if you’re vegan. It’s a crime!

People were actually paid a living wage in the gulags…. Gulags were meant for re-education.

I didn’t want PB&J to be my last meal.

— Nicolas Stacy-Alcantara, a 17-year-old hiker who survived being stranded for 30 hours in the mountains of Utah in sub-freezing temperatures and waist-deep snow, joking to a local TV station about how he survived

- British Prime Minister Boris Johnson when asked if he is abiding by “Vegan January” this year

I come from a family and an area where it’s coalmining in Scranton. Anybody who can go down 300-3,000 feet in a mine sure as [anything] can learn to program as well...

Anybody who can throw coal into a furnace can learn how to program for G-d’s sake.

- 2020 presidential candidate Joe Biden during a campaign event in New Hampshire saying that even though he will shut down the coal industry, the coalminers will be able to get jobs as computer programmers

Here at Bass Pro, we will sell you a boat, a gun, even some clothes. Shoot, you might as well even get married here.

- A Facebook post by a Bass Pro store in Tennessee along with a picture of a couple who showed their fondness for their favorite outdoor goods store by holding their wedding there

MORE QUOTES

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JANUARY 16, OCTOBER 29, 2020 2015 || The The Jewish Jewish Home Home

To the brave, long-suffering people of Iran: I’ve stood with you since the beginning of my Presidency, and my Administration will continue to stand with you. We are following your protests closely and are inspired by your courage.

- President Trump tweeting in Farsi to Iranians who have been coming out en masse to protest the regime

I think, for 2020, the first thing I’m going to do is ban breakfast. I don’t think we need to eat breakfast. That’s an advertising ploy. Unfortunately, a lot of the dogma that we were fed for decades came out of advertisements. It wasn’t really based on the truth around our health.

- Dr. Mehmet Oz

- Mark Zuckerberg writing in a Facebook post why he did not publicize a New Year’s resolution this year as he normally does

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Political Crossfire

Trump Wins His Standoff with Iran

By Marc A. Thiessen

P

resident Trump’s decision to take out Iranian terrorist mastermind Qassem Soleimani had put the United States on the path toward a cataclysmic war with Iran.

They were dead wrong. Trump won his standoff with Iran.

When Trump drew his red line – warning Tehran that if it killed even one American, the United States would respond militarily against Iran – the regime never expected him to enforce it. His decision to kill Soleimani clearly stunned Ayatollah Ali Khamenei and left his regime chastened. A regime that regularly threatens “Death to America!” and promises to wipe Israel off the face of the earth suddenly embraced proportionality and legality. Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarif said Iran would “respond, but we will respond proportionally, not disproportionally.

We will respond lawfully; we are not lawless people like President Trump.”

Quite a departure for the world’s premier state sponsor of terrorism.

Iran’s retaliation was just as muted as its threats. Tehran could have targeted large, heavily populated U.S. bases across the Persian Gulf, all of which are within range of Iranian missiles. Instead, it fired a handful of missiles at bases in Iraq, in an attack that deliberately did not target American troops. The Iranians warned Iraqi Prime Minister Adel

Abdul Mahdi in advance of the attack – a message they knew he would pass on to the United States. To control the outcome, they carried out the strike themselves, rather than relying on Shiite militia proxies in Iraq, who might accidentally kill an American.

According to Fox News’s Jennifer Grif-

In other words, the Iranians blinked. All the overwrought warnings of a U.S.-Iran conflagration were wrong. Trump understood what his critics did not – that the Iranian regime’s No. 1 priority is the preservation of the regime. Before the Soleimani strike, Iran doubted Trump’s

The Iranian regime’s No. 1 priority is the preservation of the regime.

fin, the Pentagon “believes there was a political decision taken in Tehran NOT to kill Americans.... Even within that target, the Iranians chose to hit dirt rather than runways…so as not to escalate militarily.”

The objective appeared to be political, not military. They wanted their people to see Iranian missiles firing at the Americans, without actually killing one – provoking an even more devastating U.S. response. And once it was over, Zarif announced on Twitter that Iran’s response was complete and meekly added that “we do not seek escalation or war.”

resolve. After the Soleimani strike, they knew Trump was serious when the president warned that next time “Iran itself, WILL BE HIT VERY FAST AND VERY HARD.” Trump has treated Iran for what it is – a bully.

When confronted, bullies back down.

Far from provoking war, Trump’s action against Soleimani might have prevented one. Iran had been escalating for months – striking allied oil tankers, U.S. drones and Saudi oil facilities – with no significant U.S. response. This failure to respond emboldened Tehran. Had Trump allowed Iran to get away crossing his

red line and killing an American, they would have been further emboldened.

Instead, by taking out Soleimani, Trump put the regime on its heels.

As the president put it in his address to the nation Wednesday: “For far too long…nations have tolerated Iran’s destructive and destabilizing behavior in the Middle East and beyond.

Those days are over.”

In his excellent speech, Trump rightly castigated the Obama administration for providing the Iranian regime with billions in sanctions relief as part of its nuclear deal, noting that “the missiles fired last night at us and our allies were paid for with the funds made available by the last administration.” He might well have added that Soleimani’s reign of terror was directly subsidized by those funds.

When Trump came into office, Iran was on the march across the Middle East – in Lebanon, Syria, Iraq and Yemen – thanks in part to the money President Barack Obama released. We were promised that the nuclear deal would alter Iran’s malign behavior.

Instead, it was an accelerant. With his maximum-pressure campaign, Trump has removed the accelerant.

And with his strike against Soleimani, he has eliminated the mastermind of Iran’s proxy wars across the Middle East and restored deterrence. Now he must maintain it. (c) 2020, Washington Post Writers Group

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

A Fulfilled L fe

How to Receive Feedback Like a Boss Part II

By Rabbi Dr. Naphtali Hoff

I

n our last article, we shifted the conversation from how to give feedback like a boss to how to receive it like a, well, boss. We discussed the importance of developing a growth

mindset and making yourself more approachable so that your people will share open, honest feedback.

But what does it actually look like to receive feedback like a boss?

The next time that someone approaches you with some unwanted feedback consider the following: 1. Listen to understand – Hear them out without interruption. Mirror back what you heard and ask questions for clarification. Ask for examples so you know more clearly when and in what way this is happening. If there is something that you disagree with, hold it until the end. This way you validate them and open further lines of communication. It’s always best for the concern to come directly to you rather than to others.

2. Respond carefully – Try to avoid sounding defensive. Leave your ego to the side and accept warranted concerns as well as viable advice. If you are unsure about the validity of feedback or what to do with it, ask for time to respond. Make sure to get back to the other party in a timely fashion and with a real game plan (see below).

And then ask for feedback about the plan.

3. Thank them – Let them know that you appreciate the fact that they brought this matter to you and didn’t go around you. They easily could have, and it would have been less risky and more comfortable for them. Let them know that you appreciate this growth opportunity.

4. Seek more feedback – Chances are that others also have opinions about the matter at hand. Seek out people whose opinion you trust and

try to gauge the broader impact of your actions, words, etc. Just how widespread and valid is this concern?

5. Do something – This may be the hardest part. No one likes to change. Hey, if your behaviors got you to the top, why would they not keep you there? But we all know that leadership requires a whole different set of skills and sometimes we go into our posts without such training and awareness. Seek to identify, alone or with a trusted confidant or coach, a set of actions that can help you grow as a leader.

6. Circle back – Once you’ve decided on a course of action, circle back to the party that spoke with you and share some or all of what you plan to do to improve things. This will validate their time and the risk that they took while also demonstrating your desire to grow. If this person was representing others, word will quickly circulate that you’re a leader that cares and wants to keep growing. It’ll be a true win-win.

Rabbi Naphtali Hoff, PsyD, is an executive and business coach and president of Impactful Coaching & Consulting. For a free, no obligation consultation, please call 212-470-6139 or email info@impactfulcoaching.com. Check out his new leadership book, “Becoming the New Boss,” on Amazon. Download his free eBook for understaffed leaders at ImpactfulCoaching. com/EPIC.

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020 The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

105 17

Forgotten Her es

Rescue Off the Saudi Coast

By Avi Heiligman

I

n the decade after the War of Independence in 1948, Israel had only enemies as neighbors in the Middle East. To the south of Israel in the Gulf of Eilat was the western coast of Saudi Arabia. Saudi troops had been sent to fight against the IDF in the 1948 war, and in the subsequent years, Israel tried its best to keep a close watch on Saudi activities that may affect events in the region. The Jewish State did not have a lot of top-of-the-line resources back then as it mainly relied on surplus World War II aircraft and boats to watch the Saudis. In 1954, one of these surveillance vessels broke down, and a daring operation was mounted to rescue the sailors.

On April 1, 1954, the Israeli Navy sent the trawler Bar Giora to the Saudi coast looking for possible hideouts for future operations. Disguised as a fishing vessel, the Bar Giora was an old ship, and the engine quit near the Saudi city of Daba. The ship floated away with the current until it rested on a dike by the Daba Cove.

Israeli command became aware of the dire situation and knew that if the ship’s crew was captured by the Saudis it wouldn’t be a pretty situation as the two countries did not have diplomatic ties. A British-built IAF De Havilland Mosquito fighter and a DC-3 Dakota

were sent to try and locate the missing ship. After two hours, the ship was found, and two evacuations plans were proposed. The first involved an aerial evacuation. Since this was before Israel used helicopters for search and rescue missions, Piper Cubs or PBY Catalina flying boats were going to be used. If that plan failed, another ship would be sent to the area for the rescue. The second plan was considered more dangerous, although the IAF was given the

command of the operation with Major Grisha Brown as the commander of the Piper Cub squadron.

Around midnight on the night of April 2-3, seven Pipers under the command of Captain Yitzhak Sussman-Zamir took off from Eilat for a small landing strip near the disabled ship. Since the Pipers are a very small single engine plane, with a wingspan of 35 feet, they can only land on primitive landing strips.

It wasn’t until two hours later that two of the Israeli soldiers appeared.

go ahead to begin the rescue operation.

Aerial photographs of the area were taken and distributed to the pilots.

In the end, Piper Cubs were used in the mission because the flying boats would have needed to land in an area that had just been occupied by the Saudi police. Since this was an urgent rescue mission, the commander of the air force, Colonel Ezer Weizman, was given

They flew south at low altitude in the center of the Gulf of Eilat, and after about an hour they headed east to the Saudi coast. Above them, Mosquitoes flew as air cover in case the Saudis decided to put up a fight. A Saudi police boat lurked nearby, but during the mission not an enemy plane was seen in the sky. The squadron commander recognized the ship stranded on a shipwreck

but the crew of the ship was nowhere in sight.

A small landing strip provided a base for the Pipers to touch down. It wasn’t until two hours later that two of the Israeli sailors appeared. A Piper Cub could hold only one passenger besides the pilot, and these two sailors boarded two of the rugged planes and took off for Israeli territory. Finally, the remainder of the crew appeared and boarded the Piper Cubs.

All the planes and the entire crew landed safely in Eilat last day.

P-51 Mustangs had been used as part of the operation as air cover. They were led by the future commander of the Israeli Air Force, Mordechai Hod, and after the sailors had been rescued launched rockets onto the abandoned ship, preventing it from falling into Saudi hands.

In the coming years, the pilots of these tiny Piper Cubs would transfer into a helicopter squadron. This operation was a major success and was an important opportunity for the Israelis to learn search and rescue tactics.

Avi Heiligman is a weekly contributor to The Jewish Home. He welcomes your comments and suggestions for future columns and can be reached at aviheiligman@ gmail.com.

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

107

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108 14

JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020 The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

Your

109 15

Money

War and Taxes

By Allan Rolnick, CPA

M

oviegoers the past few years could be forgiven for thinking comic books had taken over Hollywood. So much of the “sophisticated adult drama” that grownups used to see in theaters has migrated to streaming video that it seems suburban multiplexes are reserved for Batman, Superman, and their cape-wearing cronies. (Or are you more of a Marvel Cinematic Universe fan?)

Last month, director Sam Mendes released a welcome tale of actual human heroes based on his grandfather’s service in World War I. 1917 follows two British soldiers with impossible orders to cross into enemy territory and deliver a message to save 1,600 of their comrades — including one’s own brother — from walking into a deadly trap. The film is presented as being shot in a single unbroken take, which some reviewers have said comes across as gimmicky and grandstanding. Still, it’s a visual feast, and it’s already grabbed the Golden Globe for Best Drama.

Most viewers aren’t going to be thinking about taxes when they see 1917. But we don’t review movies here, we review taxes. And there is a connection. Before World War I, the

income tax was just an experiment, but after the war, it had become the significant revenue source we’ve all come to know and love.

The Revenue Act of 1913 had dramatically cut average tariffs on imported goods, from 40% to 26% and replaced that lost revenue with a

Revenue Act of 1916 doubled the bottom rate to a whopping 2% and added a new top rate of 15% on incomes above $2 million ($47 million today, or as much as Robert Downey Jr. makes for putting on his Iron Man suit). The 1916 act added an estate tax of 10% on amounts over $5 million.

Before World War I, the income tax was just an experiment.

new income tax. Rates started at just one percent on incomes over $3,000 (about $78,000 in today’s dollars) and climbed to 7% on incomes over $500,000 ($13 million today, or almost as much as Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Andy Dalton earned leading his team to a 2-14 season).

Those rates may have worked in peacetime. But World War I torpedoed international trade and tariff collections, and joining the war meant Uncle Sam needed cash – pronto. The

The Revenue Act of 1917 went even further, quadrupling the top rate to 67% and bumping the estate tax rate to 15%.

In fairness, there weren’t a lot of people not named Rockefeller making that kind of money. The hedge funds and stock options that create so much of today’s eight-figure incomes hadn’t been invented. “Motion pictures” were still silent. The NFL didn’t even exist, and baseball’s highest-paid player, Ty Cobb, made just $20,000

in salary. (Like many athletes, the Georgia Peach made far more on endorsements and investments — in Cobb’s case, his early stakes in Coca Cola and General Motors grew to north of $12 million.)

After the war, Washington dropped rates to “just” 25% on incomes over $100,000. At one point, tax filings were even public — you could show up at the local IRS office and check out your boss’s return.

The result, of course, was the Roaring 20s, an era characterized by jazz, flappers, and bathtub gin. (OK, Prohibition might have had something to do with the quality of the booze.) Then the market crashed, and rates went back up because of the Depression.

Today, it’s hard to imagine Congress and the White House mobilizing to quadruple tax rates in a single year.

Fortunately, we’re not facing a World War forcing us to do it! Even so, if you make it to the theater, remember to enjoy 1917 as an action movie and not as a financial planning exercise.

Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 years in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at allanjrcpa@aol.com.

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JANUARY 16, OCTOBER 29, 2020 2015 || The The Jewish Jewish Home Home

Life C ach

School Break

By Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., MFT, CLC

W

e are all gearing up for vacation. What exactly does this mean?

Well, it’s thinking of a place to go away! Wait, it could be thinking about whether we actually even need to go away. Can a vacation be staying home?

You bet. That’s my best!

No packing, no shlepping, no figuring out hot or cold climates. Or worrying will the hot have sun? Will the cold have snow? Will it be rainy? Do I need an umbrella or a bathing suit?

But wait. If you have kids, everyone winds up figuring out things to do anyway if you stay home. It just might

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allow you to eliminate the plane ride, but you’re still, most likely, doing a car or a train ride. Because we know staying home with kids isn’t soaking in a hot tub overflowing with bubbles. It’s running, and doing, and entertaining, and engaging, and feeding, and driving, and soothing – you get my drift.

This shouldn’t be called a vacation.

It should be called a vacation build-up because after school break ends every parent needs a vacation! While the

But rather let’s call it “anticipation of appreciation.”

It’s like the story with the man who tells the rabbi his house is too crowded. The rabbi tells him to bring in assorted animals to his small adobe and keeps telling him to bring in more and more animals. Finally, the man tells the rabbi that his house is just way too crowded now, even worse than before. But then, his rabbi tells him to take all the animals out – and

Let’s all opt for a new name for the next few weeks.

kids are dreading returning to school, the parents are dressing them in their uniforms even as they go to bed just to be sure they won’t miss the bus on their first day back.

No, I’m not saying that parents don’t love family time. I’m just stating the obvious: it’s not necessarily a picnic. You know, light and simple.

It’s more likely a complex recipe with endless ingredients needed to make everything work out just right. And all this orchestrating and micromanaging can truly be exhausting.

So, let’s all opt for a new name for the next few weeks. Not “vacation.”

then the man comes back to report that the rabbi is a genius; his home is so spacious!

Having the school break certainly gives kids an opportunity to de-stress, and they deserve it. But it also gives parents an appreciation of the exact same life they had before – just because their kids returned once again to school!

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach.

She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 16, 2020

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JANUARY 16, 2020 | The Jewish Home