Five Towns Jewish Home - 1-4-18

January 4, 2018

Distributed weekly in the Five Towns, Long Island, Queens & Brooklyn

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A Portrait of Hope

See page 7

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Community

38 Dr. Norman Blumenthal Presented with Nefesh International Esther Solomon Memorial Award

How the Landsman family is fighting for their children’s lives pg 87

Declutter Your Life pg

54 Dirshu Mourns the Loss of Maran HaRav Aharon Leib Shteinman, zt”l

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Dear Readers,

A

rus. Hospitals set up special units with iron lung machines to keep polio victims alive. The disease was widespread throughout the country, regardless of age and economic standing. Who would have imagined that by 1979, after years of vaccines incorporated in 1955, the virus was all but eliminated across the U.S.? The medical community is making tremendous strides in so many areas.

I write these words after reading the article on the Landsman family. Jennie and Gary have been heroes in the fight against the disease that is afflicting their two young sons. Both Benny and Josh suffer from Canavan disease, a progressive disease in which those afflicted cannot crawl, walk, sit or talk.

Eventually, children become blind, have trouble swallowing, and can become deaf. Most children do not live past ten years of age.

But Jennie and Gary are not going to let their children fall apart in front of their eyes, especially when the treatment that can delay or prevent the inevitable is so close. Gene therapy to help those afflicted with Canavan disease is being worked on in labs today. With the proper funding, the Landsman family will be able to see their two young sons build their own homes eventually. The funding won’t only help save their children; the research will go for others with the same disease and for those who are afflicted with different diseases who need a similar gene therapy for their treatment.

When you think about it, all that’s needed to save the Landsmans’ sweet babies is money. Yes, it’s a lot of money that’s needed and that is why Jennie and Gary are asking kindhearted people to help them in this endeavor, but money is paper (or plastic). That’s all it is. And being able to save the lives of two young children, well, that’s worth all the money in the world.

Wishing you a wonderful week, Shoshana

few years ago I took a friend of mine to the eye doctor. She was having trouble with her eye, and her eye doctor suggested she go to someone who is more of an expert in the field. For years, my friend had not been able to see peripherally. At night, she had trouble seeing. And it was getting worse. The diagnosis she received when we were at the ophthalmologist was grim: she is one of the very few people in the United States who has retinitis pigmentosa.

Retinitis pigmentosa is an inherited disease. The rods and cones on the retina of those suffering from RP gradually degenerate. Their peripheral vision is affected, as is their vision at night. Slowly – as the disease is progressive – their color perception and central vision is affected. Eventually, the person becomes legally blind, being able to see only a very small circle of what a normal person is able to see.

When my friend received the diagnosis, we were heartbroken. Imagine a 20-something-year-old being told that in a few years they won’t be able to see. What future do they have? What will life be like without their vision?

The doctor, who amazed me with his menschlechkeit, was quick to reassure my friend that although the diagnosis sounds bleak, hopefully, within a few years, science will come up with the proper treatment for those suffering from RP. It is his hope that someday soon a transplant, medication, or treatment will be available for my friend and the thousands like her who are now facing a very dark future.

Science is developing at an astronomically fast pace. How lucky we are to live in the 21st century when medications and vaccines are available for diseases that wiped out thousands throughout the years! Consider this: in 1952 alone nearly 60,000 children contracted the polio virus. Thousands were paralyzed, and more than 3,000 died from the vi-

Yitzy Halpern PUBLISHER

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Yosef Feinerman MANAGING EDITOR

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Contents LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

8

COMMUNITY Readers’ Poll Community Happenings

8 36

Thousands of Women Join Together In 68 Supporting Azan Family NEWS

74

Global

13

National

24

Odd-but-True Stories

30

ISRAEL Israel News

20

The Columbia Connection by Rafi Sackville

84

PEOPLE Portrait of Hope by Tammy Mark Bombs Away! by Avi Heiligman

87 114

PARSHA Rabbi Wein

74

We’re Not Going to Take It by Rav Moshe Weinberger 76 JEWISH THOUGHT What’s in a Name? by Eytan Kobre

104

78

Words from the Wise by Rabbi Jonathan 80 Gewirtz SJP by Rabbi Mordechai Yaffe

82

HEALTH & FITNESS How to Have a Conversation by Dr. Deb Hirschhorn

96

How to Fight Off the Flu by Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN

98

Dear Editor, This week, it was dark when I drove home from work. As I drove down West Broadway, I almost hit a man crossing in between cars. People of our community: I know we are all in a rush and need to get to places in a hurry. But your safety and the safety of those around you should not be compromised because you are rushing. Please, please, please, especially during this time of year when the streets are dark and the roads are slick, please cross at the light. Please wear something light on your clothing so cars can see you.

There are some streets without sidewalks in our neighborhood. Be extra careful when walking there, especially on Shabbos.

Avrumi Levin Dear Editor, Mr. Eytan Kobre’s article this week, “Yissachar and Zevulun Bros.

Inc.,” was a wonderful piece. I truly appreciated how he highlighted this unique relationship that has spanned generations and even continues until this day.

Y. Potter Dear Editor, When I saw your Year in Review feature on the cover I was a little

upset. You see, for me the year begins on Rosh Hashana. Indeed, the words “rosh hashana” mean the head of the year. And that’s how it should be for all frum Yidden. But then I read your note to readers and I understood why you put out a Year in Review feature at the end of December. Truly, writing about politics and world news should not be our focus as we go into the Yimei Hadin.

Kol tuv, Ruchama Kalatowitz Dear Editor, Despite what Naphtali Sobel says, I don’t think we can really trust a “skinny chef.” When someone loves to cook and experiment in the kitchen, their love for food is usually apparent in their appearance. They love to sample and taste what’s on the stove.

They love to take a little bite of this or that as they cook or when they go to parties or restaurants. After all, how else will they get inspiration for dishes or know if new flavors meld as they prepare and experiment with new recipes? Reading about ingredients will hardly allow them to taste the final product and know if what they just made was a success.

It’s a bit like a mechanic whose Continued on page 10

FOOD & LEISURE The Aussie Gourmet: Lemon Maple Glazed Salmon

104

LIFESTYLES Dating Dialogue, Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW

92

Declutter Your Life

100

Don’t be Fooled by the Word “Sale” by Michelle Singletary

118

Your Money

124

Stretching is Good for You by Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS

126

HUMOR Centerfold

72

POLITICAL CROSSFIRE Notable Quotes

106

CLASSIFIEDS

120

If you had to work outside, which do you prefer: to work in the freezing January temperatures or in the scorching days of August?

27

%

Really cold

73

%

Really hot

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Continued from page 8

fingers are always stained with grease.

If he really gets under the hood of the car, his fingers and body will be infused with oil. And then you know that he’s really doing his job.

So although I will eat at any restaurant regardless of what the chef looks like, a good chef – in a restaurant or at home – really needs to sample his or her product. After all, why are they putting the plate in front of me without really knowing what it tastes like?

Avigayil Baum

Dear Editor, Now I know why I always pick up three copies of TJH every week.

There’s always something for everyone to read – and no one wants to wait their turn for a chance to go through the paper.

Wow! What a great issue this week – it made me think that 2017 was the fun-est, most interesting year yet.

Couldn’t have been easy to make the year seem lighthearted but you did just that. We love The Jewish Home!

The Benedict Family

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PASSOVER 2018 OUR 60th YEAR

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The Week In News

Protests Rock Iran

Throngs of Iranians, fed-up with the weak economy, rising inflation, and lack of job opportunity, have gathered in the streets of Iran for anti-government protests. The protests continued into this week as well. This was the largest domestic political protest against Tehran’s leaders since the 2009 Green movement which was quickly shutdown by security forces.

In Iran, public protests are considered “illegal gatherings.”

“Everyone is fed up with the situation, from the young to the old,” said Ali, who lives near the city of Rasht, which saw big protests on Friday. He asked not to be identified by the media. “Every year thousands of students graduate, but there’s no jobs for them. Fathers are also exhausted because they don’t earn enough to provide for their family.”

There were many clashes with security forces. At least 450 people have been arrested since the protests began last Thursday. Twenty-two people have died.

“It spread very quickly in a way that nobody had really anticipated,” said Ali Ansari, a professor of Iranian history at the University of St Andrews. “It’s the biggest demonstrations since 2009 … The widespread nature of it and provincial nature of it has been quite a surprise. I think they started something and then they lost control of it; it’s taken a life of its own.

We have to see if it gains traction. The trouble is that there is no organization or anything. I don’t know what the outcome will be.”

President Trump weighed in, warning the Iranian government in a tweet, “Many reports of peaceful protests by Iranian citizens fed up with

regime’s corruption and its squandering of the nation’s wealth to fund terrorism abroad. Iranian govt should respect their people’s rights, including right to express themselves. The world is watching! #IranProtests.”

It is no secret that the U.S. would like to see a regime change in Iran.

In June, U.S. Secretary of State Rex Tillerson told Congress that America is working towards “support of those elements inside of Iran that would lead to a peaceful transition of that government.”

There is 40% unemployment for young adults in Iran, more than three million Iranians are jobless, and the prices of some basic food items, such as poultry and eggs, have recently soared by almost half.

“This has started from the bottom of the society, from the less fortunate,” Reza, a Mashhad resident, said.

“This is not middle-class protesting, this is lower-class demonstrating, people of the suburbs; many are fed up with situation.”

On Tuesday, January 2, Iranian Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei finally referred to the protests rocking the nation. He blamed Iran’s “enemies” for stirring up unrest in the country, accusing the nation’s enemies of “joining forces.”

“The enemy is waiting for an opportunity, for a flaw, through which they can enter. Look at these events over the last few days. All those who are against the Islamic Republic – those who have money, those who have the politics, those who have the weapons, those who have the intelligence – they have all joined forces in order to create problems for the Islamic Republic and the Islamic Revolution,” he said, without naming any particular country. It’s almost certain the Iranian leader is referring to the U.S., Israel, and Saudi Arabia.

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ALL SALES ARE FINAL B A G S C A N N OT B E O V E R F LO W I N G The “Bookkeeper of Auschwitz” is finally on his way to prison – at the age of 96. The constitutional court in

( E M P LOY E E S W I L L U S E T H E I R D I S C R E T I O N )

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Germany has ruled that the nonagenarian is not too old or too weak to go to jail and will indeed have to serve the four year sentence he was handed in July 2015.

The former Auschwitz concentration camp guard played a key role in the murder of 300,000 Jews during the Holocaust. Oskar Groening’s job at the camp was to keep track of all of the money that was taken from the prisoners when they arrived at the camp.

His claims for release were rejected by lower courts last year and now have been rejected again after his lawyer appealed to the highest court in Germany. His lawyer, Hans Holtermann, argued that imprisonment at Groening’s age violated his constitutional “right to life.” In response, the judge wrote that “the plaintiff has been found guilty of being accessory to murder in 300,000 related cases, meaning there is a particular importance to carrying out the sentence the state has demanded.

The high age of the applicant is in itself not sufficient to refrain from enforcing the criminal penalty.”

The court said further that Groening was part of the “machinery of death,” and could be convicted as an

accessory for all of the murders that took place while he was responsible for the accounting of money taken from those who were murdered at the time.

Groening, who admitted he was morally guilty, said he was an enthusiastic Nazi when he was sent to work at Auschwitz in 1942 at the age of 21.

Liberia Open for Business

Former soccer star George Weah won the December 26 presidential election in Liberia. In the week following his victory, Weah called for foreign investment as he attempts to keep his promise of restoring the economy.

In his first speech as president-elect, Weah thanked his predecessor, Nobel Peace Prize laureate Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, for enabling Liberia’s first democratic transition in over 70 years.

He also said that he plans to make sweeping changes in the troubled land.

During his campaign Weah pledged to address unemployment and poverty in the country.

“Those looking to cheat the Liberian people through corruption will have no place,” asserted Weah, 51, hinting to high-profile scandals that tarnished Johnson Sirleaf’s 12-year presidency.

Weah expects to assemble his cabinet over the next few days, leading up to his mid-January inauguration. Weah was a public figure before winning the election. The former soccer star became the only African to win FIFA World Player of the Year in 1995.

“To investors, we say Liberia is open for business,” he said during his speech.

Weah also addressed the many Liberians living overseas, begging them to return to their homeland.

From 1989 to 2003, the country was plagued by a civil war, driving many people away.

“We are not enemies,” he said in comments addressed to his political opponents. “We welcome you with open arms as we try to build our country. Two days ago the world watched me cry. I did not cry because I won. I cried that many people lost their lives in the struggle for change.”

Did a Hong Kong Ship Violate UN Sanctions?

The crew of a Hong Kong-based ship that allegedly transferred oil to a North Korean vessel is being held in South Korea until a full investigation can be conducted. If the crew of

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

the Lighthouse Winmore did indeed transfer 600 tons of refined petroleum products to the Sam Jong 2, a North Korean ship, in international waters in the East China Sea, it violated U.N. sanctions.

Customs officials in South Korea boarded the ship and interviewed its 25 crew members after they returned to the Yeosu port. The 23 Chinese nationals and 2 Myanmar residents will be allowed to leave South Korea after the investigation is over. South Korea will be reporting the results of their inspection to the U.N. Security Council sanctions committee.

The ship also transferred oil to three other ships that were not from heavily sanctioned North Korea. It was chartered by Taiwan’s Billions Bunker Group and stopped in South Korea to load about 14,000 tons of Japanese oil products. It claimed that its destination was Taiwan, according to port documents in Yeosu.

Six North Korean shipping companies and 20 of their vessels were sanctioned by the U.S. Treasury Department in November. The Treasury also reported photos of a North Korean ship transferring oil on October 19, possibly to avoid sanctions.

The ship that was photographed has been identified as Rye Song Gang 1.

stated that Nisman took his own life.

Federal judge Julián Ercolini has now ruled that the gunshot wound could not have been self-inflicted and has charged Diego Lagomarsino, a former aide of Nisman’s, with accessory to murder.

Lagomarsino was the last person to have left Nisman’s apartment the night he was killed, and the bullet that killed him was fired by Lagomarcino’s gun. Lagomarsino says that Nisman asked him to borrow his gun because he feared for his own safety. Lagomarsino told reporters that he was very nervous after the judge’s report but was sure that “sooner or later this is going to be resolved.”

Nisman was in charge of the investigation into the bombing of the Argentine Israelite Mutual Association (AIMA). The explosion, which killed 85 people, was the worst bombing attack in Argentina’s history.

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Judge: Alberto Nisman Killed

Alberto Nisman’s death has officially been classified as a murder by a federal judge. Nisman was found dead hours before he was set to testify against former Argentine president Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner for a cover up involving the bombing of a Jewish center in Buenos Aires.

Nisman died from a gunshot wound in his Buenos Aires apartment in 2015. He was slated to testify the next day that Fernandez had helped keep Iran’s name out of the investigation into the 1994 bombing.

The official report that was released in the weeks following his death

The 500 wealthiest people in the world became almost $1 trillion richer in 2017. That’s a 1 with 12 zeros after it. For comparison, in 2016 the same group added only a quarter of that to their wealth.

Founder of online giant Amazon Jeff Bezos took the biggest jump last year by adding $34.2 billion to his net worth, which is now over $100 billion. Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook, and Bernard Arnault, CEO of LVMH, also saw big increases this past year. They added $23 billion and $24.5 billion to their net worths, respectively.

The 500 billionaires on Bloomberg’s wealthy index from 2017 have a net worth of $5.3 trillion. That is more money than the gross domestic product of Japan, or Germany, or the United King-

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dom and France combined. There are now more billionaires on Earth than ever before, with Forbes counting 2,043 of them around the globe.

There were 230 more added in the year 2017.

China had the most newly minted billionaires in 2017, with 76 residing there. The United States added 25 people that now have 10-figure fortunes. Are you one of them?

Assad Reshuffles His Govt President Bashar Assad reshuffled his government on Monday, replacing the ministers of defense, information and industry, Syria’s state news agency SANA reported.

SANA did not give a reason for the government reshuffle that comes

at a time when Assad’s forces have been gaining ground over the past two years under the cover of Russian airstrikes and with the help of Iranbacked fighters.

Army commander Gen. Ali Ayoub was named defense minister, replacing Fahd Jassem al-Freij who had held the post since 2012. Ayoub had been the army chief of staff since July 2012 until he became defense minister. Imad Sarah was named informa-

tion minister while Mohammed Mazen Youssef was chosen as the new minister of industry.

The announcement came as different parts of Syria witnessed violence, mostly in the suburbs of the capital Damascus and northwestern Syria, where troops are on the offensive on the southern edge of Idlib province. Heavy clashes broke out between Syrian government forces and insurgents east of Damascus when troops tried to reach under the cover of a dozen airstrikes a force trapped inside, opposition activists said.

The clashes have been ongoing for three days, but on Sunday, rebels backed by al-Qaeda-linked fighters attacked troops and pro-government gunmen capturing parts of a military installation and surrounding a force inside. The Syrian air force conducted at least a dozen airstrikes on Harasta and nearby suburbs. The government brought in reinforcements overnight and is trying to reach the trapped unit.

The Observatory said three days of violence in the suburbs of Damascus known as eastern Ghouta has killed 35 civilians, as well as 24 government troops and 29 insurgents.

The U.N. says government forces are holding nearly 400,000 people under siege in eastern Ghouta. The region was once a hotbed of protest against President Bashar Assad’s government.

2 Jewish Families Killed in Plane Crash

On Sunday, 12 people lost their lives when a charter aircraft crashed

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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in the woods of Costa Rica. Investigators are still not certain of the cause of the crash, saying that either strong winds or mechanical problems were the problems.

Sadly, two Jewish families, one from Scarsdale, NY, and one from Belleair, FL, perished in the crash.

They were on a tour organized by Berkeley, California-based Backroads. Their American guide also died, along with two members of the crew.

Bruce and Irene Steinberg and their sons Matthew, William and Zachary were from New York. The Steinbergs were flying to the Costa Rican capital from the Pacific coast on the last leg of their vacation.

Bruce Steinberg worked in investment banking and his wife volunteered at several organizations. Matthew Steinberg was in eighth grade at a private school, William was studying at the University of Pennsylvania, and Zachary was a student at John Hopkins University.

Mitchell and Leslie Levin Weiss, along with their daughter Hannah and their son Ari, were from Florida.

Mitchell Weiss was a vascular and interventional radiologist, and Leslie Weiss was a pediatrician. Nineteenyear-old Hannah, their daughter, was earning a joint degree at Columbia University and List College.

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In a grainy video obtained by CNN, an unidentified voice can be heard calling out, “Eight hundred, 900 ... 1,000 ... 1,100 ...” Apparently the man is auctioning something off and settles for a price of 1,200 Libyan dinars, equal to about $800. The thing being auctioned off is not a used car or a piece of jewelry but two human beings. One of two men being sold appears to be in his twenties and is promoted as one of a group of “big strong boys for farm work,” according to the auctioneer, who remains

off camera.

Many questioned the authenticity of the recently aired clip, shocked to learn that slave auctions take place in 2017. Last month, CNN officials traveled to Libya to investigate and verify the video. Armed with hidden body cameras CNN workers entered a property outside the capital of Tripoli and witnessed a dozen people go “under the hammer” in the space of six or seven minutes.

“Does anybody need a digger?

This is a digger, a big strong man, he’ll dig,” the salesman, dressed in camouflage gear, says. “What am I bid, what am I bid?”

And within minutes the man’s life was sold to their new master.

CNN journalists had the opportunity to converse with two men who were sold. They conveyed that they were so deeply traumatized by what they’d been through that they could not speak. According to observation, they were extremely paranoid and suspicious of everyone they met. It is believed that many of the people being sold as slaves are refugees. Each year, tens of thousands of people cross Libya’s borders, fleeing conflict or searching for better financial opportunities, although slavery is unlikely what they have in mind.

In recent months the Libyan coastguard has shut down the border and is blocking many refugee boats from arriving. This has left smugglers with an overflow of want-to-be refugees, which allows them to become “masters” and forces the refugees to become slaves.

CNN has handed the video over to Libyan authorities, who have vowed to launch an investigation.

First Lieutenant Naser Hazam of the government’s Anti-Illegal Immigration Agency in Tripoli told CNN that although he had not witnessed a slave auction, he acknowledged that organized gangs are operating smuggling rings in the country.

“They fill a boat with 100 people, those people may or may not make it,” Hazam says. “[The smuggler] does not care as long as he gets the money, and the migrant may get to Europe or die at sea.”

“The situation is dire,” Mohammed Abdiker, the director of operation and emergencies for the International Organization for Migration, said in a statement after returning from Tripoli in April. “Some reports are truly horrifying and the latest reports of ‘slave markets’ for migrants can be added to a long list of outrages.”

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

One refugee named Victory relayed his tragic story. At the age of 21 he fled his home in Nigeria and spent 16 months trying to reach Europe, using every last penny to his name.

He finally reached Libya where he says he lived in grim living conditions, deprived of food and abused and mistreated by his captors.

“If you look at most of the people here, if you check your bodies, you see the marks. They are beaten, mutilated,” he said. After running out of money, his smugglers demanded that he be sold as a slave to repay his debts. He was sold several times. The smugglers also demanded ransom payments from Victory’s family before eventually releasing him.

Jordanian Restructuring for Arrest?

A statement put out by the Jordanian military is denying that two brothers of King Abdullah II and his cousin were arrested for having contact with officials in Saudi Arabia. The removal of King Abdullah’s brothers were described by the Jordanian military as their “retirement.”

The state-run Petra news agency said that Abdullah’s relatives were simply part of a “restructuring” plan which will make way for Crown Prince Hussein, the king’s eldest son, to play a larger role in the army.

Despite the statement, some said the relatives’ arrests were allegedly ordered by King Abdullah after his intelligence department informed him of his brothers speaking on multiple occasions with Saudi and United Arab Emirates officials. Jordanian news outlets had reported that the two were being held under house arrest.

Jordan is reportedly very frustrated with Saudi Arabia’s Crown Prince Mohammed Bin Salman’s new outlook on the Temple Mount. The young prince has publicly said that he wishes to strip the Hashemite Kingdom of its custodianship over the holy site.

Last week King Abdullah thanked

the three princes upon their retirement for their service. The monarch, who is the supreme commander of the Jordan Armed Forces, said he was restructuring the military to improve operational capability, trim expenses and reorganize its command structure.

Part of the reform package, according to the Centre for American Progress, an independent non-partisan policy institute, entails restructuring and downsizing of the Jordanian Special Operations Command (JORSOCOM) — a long-time partner of the U.S. special operations community housed under JAF. The Royal Court has declared that it will punish those circulating false reports about the restructuring. “The Royal Hashemite Court will pursue legal measures against those who spread lies and false claims against Their Royal Highnesses the Princes and members of the Royal Hashemite Family, as the fabricated news circulated recently is aimed at undermining Jordan and its institutions,” the Royal Court said in a statement published by the government news agency Petra on Sunday. “Our loyal people do not fall for such lies, which can never damage Jordan’s national unity and the deep-rooted relationship between Jordanians and the Royal Hashemite Family.”

As to who is spreading the rumors, one theory places the blame on Qatar.

“It was an attempt by the Qataris to rally the Jordanian street to exert pressure on the Jordanian regime in an attempt to undermine its ties with the Saudis,” explained Zaid Nawaiseh, an independent political analyst based in Amman. Saudi Arabia – along with the UAE, Egypt and Bahrain – severed diplomatic, economic and transport ties with Qatar in June.

The Safest Skies

Did you go on an airplane in 2017?

Must have been a safe experience.

2017 was the safest year on record for airplane passengers. Interestingly, it

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is also the year when more people flew to more places than ever.

The Dutch-based aviation consultancy, To70, has released its Civil Aviation Safety Review for 2017. It reports only two fatal accidents, both involving small turbo-prop aircraft, with a total of 13 lives lost.

No jets crashed in passenger service anywhere in the world.

The two crashes which occurred on New Year’s Eve – a seaplane in Sydney which killed six, and a Cessna Caravan which crashed in Costa Rica, killing all 12 on board – were not included in the tally, since both aircraft weighed under 5,700kg – the threshold for the report.

The chances of a plane being involved in a fatal accident is now one in 16 million, according to the lead researcher, Adrian Young.

But Young, senior aviation consultant for To70, told The Independent: “It is unlikely that this historic low will be maintained; in part, these very positive figures rest on good fortune.

Nevertheless, the safety level that civil aviation has achieved is remarkable.”

He points out that the risks to flying is still high as there are many non-fatal accidents during flights.

Additionally, checked-in electronic

devices can pose a danger, as their lithium-ion batteries can create a fire risk onboard.

In 2016, 271 people lost their lives in seven fatal events. They included the crash of an Egyptair flight from Paris to Cairo which killed 66, and a LaMia jet carrying the Brazilian football team Chapecoense which ran out of fuel in Colombia and crashed with the loss of 71 lives.

The death toll in the two previous years was significantly higher. In 2015, 471 people died in four crashes; they included a Metrojet flight from Sharm el Sheikh to St Petersburg, Russia, which killed 224, and a Germanwings Airbus A320 from Barcelona to Dusseldorf whose first officer, Andreas Lubitz, killed 150 on board by deliberately crashing into the French Alps, In 2014, 864 people died in five crashes, including the losses of two Malaysia Airlines 777s: MH370, whose fate is still unknown, and MH17, downed by a missile over eastern Ukraine.

The UK has the best air-safety record of any major country. No fatal accidents involving a British airline have happened since the 1980s.

The last was on January 10, 1989; 47

people died when a British Midland Boeing 737 crashed at Kegworth in Leicestershire.

In contrast, subSaharan Africa has an accident rate 44 percent worse than the global average, according to the International Air Transport Association (IATA). In November, Alexandre de Juniac, IATA’s director general, said: “African safety has improved, but there is a gap to close.”

In other words, stay out of Africa, unless you’re going by boat.

2/3 Majority Needed to Vote on Jerusalem In the early hours of the morning on Tuesday lawmakers approved a bill that requires a special two-thirds majority vote in the Knesset to relinquish any part of Jerusalem to the Palestinians under a future peace ac-

cord. The bill passed its second and third readings by a majority of 64 in favor, 51 against, and one abstention.

The law, which was proposed by Jewish Home MK Shuli Moalem-Refaeli and had the coalition’s backing, is designed to make it much harder to divide the city, which Israel asserts as its undivided capital. The Palestinians claim East Jerusalem as the capital of a future state. The legislation, an amendment to the Basic Law on Jerusalem, requires 80 of the 120 MKs to support relinquishing any part of the city.

Before, the Jerusalem Law, passed in 1980 and amended in 2000, stated: “No authority that is stipulated in the law of the State of Israel or of the Jerusalem Municipality may be transferred either permanently or for an allotted period of time to a foreign

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

body, whether political, governmental or to any other similar type of foreign body.”

With no provision in the Basic Law specifying how it can be amended, it was possible to overturn it with a simple majority.

“The goal of the bill is to prevent concessions as part of diplomatic deals,” said Moalem-Refaeli in the summer, the time when it was proposed. “Jerusalem will never be on the negotiating table. The State of Israel will not allow for the establishment of a Palestinian state with its capital in Jerusalem. Get it into your heads that Jerusalem was the capital of the Jewish people and will remain the capital of the Jewish people for all eternity,” she said.

Opposition lawmaker Nahman Shai (Zionist Union) criticized the new law, saying it could spark further unrest. “We don’t need new laws on Jerusalem now, we have already seen what happens on the Temple Mount,” he said, referring to widespread violence that erupted in the summer when Israel tried to impose new security procedures at the holy site after a deadly terror attack there.

“When Jerusalem burns, everything burns,” Shai said.

Israel annexed East Jerusalem in 1980, but the move has not been recognized internationally and most countries refuse to recognize any part of the city as Israel’s capital, saying it is an issue that will need to be decided in negotiations with the Palestinians. President Trump overturned that reality when he declared unequivocally that Jerusalem is the capital of Israel.

U.S. & Israel Sign Iran Understanding

document was signed at the White House on December 12 after weeks of intensive talks between Israeli and American intelligence officials led

by U.S. and Israeli national security advisors H. R. McMaster and Meir Ben-Shabbat.

According to reports, the agreement will align Israel’s and the United States’ strategy and policy regarding Iran. Joint teams will handle various aspects of the Iranian threat and all intelligence will be shared between the two countries. One of the teams will focus on Iran’s activity in Syria and its support for the Hezbollah terror organization. Another team will be monitoring Iran’s nuclear weapons ambitions, while another will tackle Iran’s ballistic missile program.

An Israeli official has been quoted as saying that the United States and Israel “see eye to eye on the trends and processes in the region” and have come to an official pact on how to deal with Iran. On October 13, President Trump announced that he would not recertify the Iranian nuclear deal signed by President Obama and outlined his philosophy regarding Tehran. “We cannot and will not make this certification,” Trump had said. “We will not continue down a path whose predictable conclusion is more violence, more terror and the very real threat of Iran’s nuclear breakout.”

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was fiercely against the deal before it was signed and even traveled to the United States to deliver a speech to Congress urging them to reject it. President Obama insisted that the deal would benefit Israel as well as the rest of the region and has counted the signing of the Iran nuclear deal as one of his major foreign policy achievements.

Almost 9 Million Strong

Israel and the United States have signed a secret joint memorandum of understanding concerning Iran’s nuclear drive, missile programs, and other threatening activities. The

Data has been released by Israel’s Central Bureau of Statistics on the country’s population numbers for 2017. What does the Jewish State look like at the beginning of 2018?

There are 8,793,000 people currently living in Israel, of which 6,556,000 are Jewish.

The country is 75% Jewish, and 21% are Arab, with 1,837,000 Arabs living in Israel. 400,000 non-Arab Christians and people who are not

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classified by their religion make up 4 percent of the population. The census does not include the estimated 170,000 foreign nationals who work in the country or people who enter the country illegally.

The population of Israel grew in 2017 by 165,000, with 180,000 babies born – 74 percent of them Jewish, 23 percent Arabs, and 3 percent others – and 44,000 people passing away. 8,000 Israelis who have lived outside of Israel for more than a year were removed from the count for this year.

27,000 people made Aliyah last year, with around 10,000 other immigrants joining the country’s population. Russia sent the most olim to Israel, accounting for 27% of new olim heading to the Holy Land. Those coming from Ukraine made up 25%, those from France made up 13%, and 10% came from the United States.

France Denies Special Tax Unit for Jews

After a recent article in Globes about a French tax unit set up specifically to target Jews, the French tax authority quickly issued a denial, refuting the idea of a unit dedicated to targeting Jews.

“There is no such body in the framework” of the French fiscal ser-

vices, the statement by the revenue service (DGFiP) read, calling the allegations “completely unfounded.”

One of the unnamed officials quoted in the Globes article reportedly said that French tax authorities set up the unit because they “call the Israel Tax Authority almost every day with requests for information about some person or other, but many of the requests are rejected.”

The DGFiP said this was false and that only a few dozen requests for information are relayed to Israel annually.

The Globes article, which contains neither a reaction from the DGFiP nor an indication as to whether the paper had tried to obtain one, said that the unit targeting French Jews is located on the 13th floor of the Paris headquarters of the DGFiP on Bercy Street. In its statement, DGFiP noted the building only has nine floors, adding that its spokespeople would have gladly told Globes this had DGFiP been approached ahead of the article’s publication.

The article published in Globes noted that the unit has 20 Hebrew-speaking employees, and is in the process of hiring five more. The department was ostensivly established to handle French Jewish tax evaders and hired employees with professional experience and a profound understanding of Israeli law in order to examine whether Jews were using these laws to evade tax in France. The aim of the department is to catch French tax evaders using Israel as a tax shelter.

According to information obtained by Globes, as part of the department’s activity, the unit’s employees take out Land Registry extracts in Israel for the purpose of examining deals contracted in Israel and reaching French residents who have acquired properties here. The investigators have mapped the main streets in various cities in Israel, including Tel Aviv, Herzliya, Ra’anana, Netanya and Jerusalem, in which many purchases by Jewish residents of France take place. They have obtained Land Registry extracts and examined the particulars of a deal in order to detect foreign passport numbers. The investigators cross-referenced the information with data in their databases and the reports by those French Jews about their assets and income. In cases in which it was found that the person did not report the properties he bought in Israel, he was also summoned for questioning.

According to figures from the

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

Israel Ministry of Immigration and Absorption, immigration from France has increased dramatically in recent years. 1,211 new immigrants arrived in Israel from France in the first half of 2017. A study conducted at Bar-Ilan University showed that the economic benefit for the Israeli economy from the absorption of Jews from France could reach $65 billion.

The study assumes that 100,000 immigrants will arrive from France by 2026.

Palestinian Envoy Withdrawn from Pakistan

port to justify his extradition. The United States has accused Pakistan of harboring extremists because of cases such as Saeed.

India protested against the Palestinians’ involvement in a rally that included Saeed, calling their association with him “unacceptable.” A spokesman for Indian Foreign Ministry Raveesh Kumar added, “We are taking up the matter strongly with the Palestinian ambassador in New Delhi and with the Palestinian authorities.”

The Palestinian envoy reacted to the Indian outrage by leaving Pakistan and said his involvement with Saeed was “an unintended mistake, but not justified.” Pakistan’s Foreign Ministry defended the envoy, saying it welcomed his “active participation in events organized to express solidarity with the people of Palestine.”

Indictment for Palestinian Attackers The Palestinian envoy to Pakistan was withdrawn after he shared the stage at a rally with a radical terrorist cleric who has been linked to the 2008 Mumbai attacks. Walid Abu Ali appeared at a gathering to protest the United States recognition of Jerusalem as the capital of Israel. After it was reported that Ali was on stage with Hafiz Saeed, the head of the Jamaat-ud-Dawa movement, the Palestinians told Ali to return home.

Jamaat-ud-Dawa is believed to be a front for the Lashkar-e-Taiba militant group that battles Indian troops in the disputed region of Kashmir. Saeed founded the group and has a $10 million price on his head. He is believed to be the mastermind of the November 2008 Mumbai terrorist attacks which claimed the lives of 166 people. Pakistan has refused to extradite him to the United States, where he is wanted for crimes of terror. Saeed has been allowed to operate freely in Pakistan since the attacks, serving only 11 months of house arrest for his involvement in the terror acts.

Saeed denies any involvement in the assaults, and Pakistan says that India has not provided enough sup-

Noor Tamimi, Ahed Tamimi and Nariman Tamimi have been indicted on assault charges after being filmed harassing and slapping IDF soldiers.

The video of Noor, her cousin, Ahed, and Ahed’s mother, Nariman, went viral last month. The film clip shows them kicking, cursing, and slapping Israeli soldiers in the village of Nabi Saleh, near the PA-controlled city of Ramallah. In the video, the IDF soldiers do not react to the women’s assault.

The indictment against Ahed, 17, cited a total of 12 counts, which took into account five other squabbles with IDF soldiers that she was alleged to have taken part in over the past two years.

After the assault against the soldiers, Nariman asked Ahed her thoughts: “I hope that everyone will take part in the demonstrations as this is the only means to achieve the result,” Ahed said. “Our strength is in our stones, and I hope that the world will unite to liberate Palestine, because [Donald] Trump made his declaration and [the Americans] need to take responsibility for any response that comes from us,” Ahed added, apparently referring to the U.S. president’s decision last month to recognize Jerusalem as Israel’s capital.

“Whether it is stabbings or sui-

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cide bombings or throwing stones, everyone must do his part and we must unite in order for our message to be heard that we want to liberate Palestine,” she concluded.

Ahed is an icon for the Palestinian “resistance.” With her long, curly, blond hair, she has been assaulting IDF soldiers for many years.

In a video from a few years ago she and her family are seen assaulting an IDF soldier as he tries to arrest her brother. At least five people are seen pummeling the soldier and beating him. Ahed bites his hand. A few people are seen videotaping the assault against the soldier, which was circulated to show how the Palestinians are “striving” to “defend” themselves.

The soldiers in the video that was filmed last week had been sent there to control the violent riots that were breaking out in the area. The video ignited severe criticism against the IDF for their policies that demand their soldiers restrict their use-offorce. Army regulations require very high levels of restraint when dealing with protestors, no matter how farleft or anti-Israel they are, and regardless of the assault being made against them.

“We value the restraint of the soldiers, but this, too, has a limit,” said an IDF Brigadier General. “It’s good to remain calm, cool, and collected but there’s also a need to identify the point at which things have gone too far. Pepper spray the attacker’s face, force him to the ground, cuff him and arrest him.”

NFL Issues Concussion Guidelines

A recent study funded by the NFL Players Association concluded

that 60% of professional football players have suffered from at least one concussion during their careers and that 26% suffered at least three.

This study prompted numerous lawsuits and new guidelines and rules in the football association.

Last month, Tom Savage, quarterback for the Houston Texans, suffered a concussion. He was immediately removed from the game and examined. The medical staff present at the December 10th game said that Savage did not display any symptoms of a concussion and deemed him fit to continue the game. After returning to the field, Savage began to display signs of a concussion and was then removed again and taken for further examination.

According to the NFL and the NFL Players Association, the way this case was handled is “unacceptable,” and they are seeking to improve protocol for future similar scenarios.

“The NFL and NFLPA recognize that Mr. Savage’s return to the game did not reflect the expected outcome of the Protocol,” the statement reads. “As such, the parties have agreed that no discipline will be assessed, but have already implemented several improvements to the Protocol to prevent such an unacceptable outcome in the future.”

They plan to implement a pilot program using a centralized Unaffiliated Neurotrauma Consultant (UNC) based at the league office to monitor the broadcast feeds of all games. The UNC will contact the team’s medical staff on the sideline should they observe any signs or symptoms warranting further evaluation. Additionally, impact seizure and fencing responses will be recognized as independent signs of potential loss of consciousness, representing “No-Go” criteria under the current protocol. Players that display either of these signs at any time will be removed from the game and will not return. Any player that displays gross or sustained vertical instability, like stumbling or falling to the ground when trying to stand, will immediately be required to report to the locker room for concussion evaluation. Also, all teammates, coaching staff, and officials are now required to take any injured player directly to a member of the medical team for appropriate evaluation. Since it is not uncommon for concussion symptoms to appear later, all players who undergo concussion evaluations on game day must

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The change was introduced since Twitter has become the new mode of communication for many and it became too cumbersome to collect every single public tweet. According to Twitter, not only are people tweeting more, their tweets are getting longer, especially since Twitter recently doubled its character limit from 140 characters to 280. Additionally, now that users are able to upload images, videos, and links it has become more difficult to archive.

“The library only receives text.

It does not receive images, videos or linked content. Tweets now are often more visual than textual, limiting the value of text-only collecting,” the Library added.

Created in 1800, the Library of Congress serves as the unofficial library of the United States, as well as being Congress’ official research library.

Think your tweet will make the Library list?

First Baby of 2018

have a follow-up evaluation the following day by a member of the medical staff.

The NFL Players Association is hoping that these new guidelines will help protect the health of players since concussions can have longterm effects on the brain.

Chronicling Tweets The Library of Congress is ringing in the New Year with a major change. The Library has methodically collected every single public tweet since Twitter’s birth in 2006.

But it’s time to stop. Beginning Jan-

uary 1, 2018 the Library began only collecting and preserving tweets “on a selective basis.”

“Generally, the tweets collected and archived will be thematic and event-based, including events such as elections, or themes of ongoing national interest, e.g. public policy,” the Library said in a statement.

We’re thinking President Trump’s tweets will be recorded for posterity.

Just two seconds after the stroke of midnight on January 1, Jennica Lynch and Davante Perez welcomed a bouncing baby boy to their family. Logan James Lynch Perez was the first U.S. baby born in the new year. The baby was delivered on the U.S. island territory of Guam in the Western Pacific. He weighed 6 pounds, 15 ounces.

Little Logan was immediately showered with gifts after his debut, including a gift basket with goodies worth $200 from the family of Kylie

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F R O M

O U R

VOICEMAILS

#41

I’m her father, so you would think I’m the least surprised that she’s engaged at last.

Still, I’m the father, so I know just how surprising it is that we’ve reached this point.

This could only be the work of the Kollel Chatzos talmidei chachamim…

C.M., Lawrence NY

Ray Tesalona, 2017’s first New Year’s baby. The family reportedly wanted to pay forward the generosity they received after Kylie’s birth.

“It’s exciting, we’re blessed,” Lynch told the Pacific Daily News while cradling her newborn son. “We’re thankful for everything.”

A few thousand miles away, in New York City, the first baby born in the city in 2018 was a 4 pound, 11 ounce girl born at 12:01 a.m. She was named Ariana.

“This is my miracle baby. This is my blessed baby,” said Ariana’s father Imran Nazir, who is a taxi driver and student at York College, at the hospital in Queens. He’s originally from Bangladesh. “Praise the Al-mighty. I cried [when I first saw her] … I saw her little fingers, I felt very happy.”

New Laws for 2018 ‫להצלחת עובדיה‬ ‫בן מלכה‬ '‫וכל משפ‬

While the world is preoccupied with making personal goals for the New Year, there were many changes that were implemented legally at the start of 2018. Some of the new laws that went into effect this year will help U.S. citizens when voting, at their jobs, and after they have a baby.

In Iowa and West Virginia, this year voters will be required to show their IDs at the polls in order to combat voter fraud.

In California, employers can no longer ask a job applicant their previous salary; applicants can volunteer that information if they like.

This is aimed at protecting employees and narrow the gender pay gap since often employers decide whether to make a job offer or how much to offer based on the applicant’s history.

In Vermont, employers are not allowed to request or require employees to provide their social media content. This new law was made to protect the privacy of employees.

After people were accidentally killed during traffic stops with police, North Carolina’s driver’s handbook will now give instructions on how to deal with police during a traffic stop.

This law will probably affect many of you, particularly fathers who generally do not receive paternity leave. In New York, employees

will now be allowed up to eight weeks of paid family leave. This includes bonding with a newborn, adopted or foster child, caring for a family member who is ill, or helping with a family member who is deployed on military service.

In Illinois, pets will be treated more like kids than property in divorces. Pets, specifically “companion animals” (not service animals), could be subject to partial or joint custody after their owners’ divorce.

Also in Illinois, August 4 is now officially a state holiday: Barack Obama Day. Don’t get too excited, kids. It’s a commemorative holiday, meaning you won’t be getting off from work or school. Also, in case this ever comes up, corn is the official grain of Illinois.

Do you live in Tennessee? Better head to the barbershop for your haircut. Barbers are now not allowed to make house calls in Tennessee if they have residential certificates.

Until now, they were allowed to give a customer a haircut at home if they were ill.

Seems like the new year brings new laws all across the country.

It’s Cold Outside

We don’t have to tell you it’s cold outside. You know it when you open the door and the blast of icy temperatures shatters your bones.

Across much of the nation the cold pervaded during the early part of the week. At least four people were killed over New Year’s weekend due to the cold. The National Weather Service issued wind chill warnings for Tuesday as dangerously low temperatures were due from eastern Montana across the Midwest into the Atlantic coast and the Northeast and down through the deep South.

School districts in Iowa, Massachusetts, Indiana, Ohio and North Carolina canceled or delayed the start of classes as bitterly cold temperatures – 20 degrees to 30 degrees

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

‫ישיבה דרך איתן‬

Sefer Zikaron

‫ע”ש מרן רבי‬ ‫אברהם יפה'ן זצ”ל‬

Y E S H I VA O F FA R R O C K AWAY YAAKOV AND ILANA MELOHN CAMPUS

A Sefer Zikaron, dedicated

IN MEMORY OF REB YOSEF MELOHN Z”L

to the memory of Rabbi Brafman ZT”L, is being planned in conjunction with the dinner. Talmidim, chaveirim, mispallelim, and family members are invited to submit divrei Torah, articles, memoirs, vignettes, and photos. Submissions may be sent via email to zikaron@ yofr.org or mailed to the Yeshiva before January 22nd.

Please note: space constraints may limit us from including

The Rabbi

some submissions. Originals may not be returned.

Aaron Brafman

Rabbi Avrohom Boruch Brafman

TRIBUTE DINNER

Dinner Chairman

Mr. Joel Ganz Journal Chairman

C o m m e m o r a t i n g a L i f e o f B u i l d i n g Ta l m i d i m

Tribute Committee Mr. Moshe Majeski Chairman

Mr. Chaim Balter Dr. Joel Baum Dr. Tzvi Rubin Mr. David Schreiber, Esq.

Mr. Benjamin Brafman Guest of Honor L

Alumni Tribute Committee

Accepting the Rabbi Aaron Brafman Memorial Tribute

Mr. Yossi Deutsch Chairman

Mr. Yanky Kleinkaufman Dr. Yaakov Leb Mr. Aaron Martin Mr. Matis Miller

Motzei Shabbos, February 10, 2018 ‫מוצאי שבת‬ ‫שקלים‬-‫פרשת משפטים‬ ‫כ”ה שבט תשע”ח‬ At the Yeshiva Campus 802 Hicksville Road Far Rockaway, NY 11691

For reservations or journal ad placement please contact:

P. 718.327.7600 E. dinner@yofr.org W. www.yofr.org

4 9 T H

A N N U A L

D I N N E R

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Fahrenheit below normal – were expected across the eastern half of the United States.

“Just the bitter cold which is just too dangerous to put kids out on the street waiting for a bus that may not come,” Herb Levine, superintendent of the Peabody Public Schools, north of Boston, noted.

The cold was blamed for the deaths of two men in separate incidents in Milwaukee, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. A homeless man was found dead on a porch in Charleston, West Virginia, while another man was found dead outside a church in Detroit. Police said he may have froze to death.

Many places across the United States experienced record low temperatures over the last few days.

Omaha, Nebraska, posted a low of minus 20 degrees, breaking a 130-year-old record, and Aberdeen, South Dakota, shattered a record set in 1919 with a temperature of minus 32 degrees.

Another arctic blast is expected to hit the area on Thursday and will linger for a few days, bringing snow and frigid temperatures.

Flu Season is Upon Us

Hopefully you all got your flu shots at the start of fall because there are numerous severe cases being reported across the nation. Flu season begins in October and carries through May. Already this year there have been reports of significantly more cases this season. Arizona has reported a nearly nine-fold increase in the number of flu cases in the state compared to the same period last year, according to the state Department of Health Services.

The typical flu symptoms include fever, body aches, chills, fatigue, cough and a sore throat. In most cases, the flu lasts just a few days and is not especially dangerous. However,

in very young children, the elderly and pregnant women, it can be dangerous and can lead to complications.

Additionally, those that suffer from respiratory problems need to be extra cautious. In some cases, influenza can develop into pneumonia, an infection that causes the lungs’ air sacs to become inflamed and fill with fluid. Untreated or complicated cases of flu or pneumonia can lead to death in severe circumstances.

In California, at least 11 people under the age of 65 have died, according to the San Francisco Chronicle. North Carolina and South Carolina both reported fatalities due to the flu. 12 people, including a child and seven, all over 65, died from the flu this season there.

The flu shot is highly recommended but it is possible to contract a strain of the flu even if vaccinated. To encourage patients to get the flu shot, most insurers fully cover the cost and pharmacists in all states can administer the vaccinations, according to the American Pharmacists Association trade group.

Medical professionals also remind people to wash or sanitize hands frequently, especially in public places. If you do catch the dreadful

illness, be sure to drink lots of water.

Staying hydrated helps your body to fight off infection. Some doctors prescribe antiviral prescription drugs such as Tamiflu to minimize the severity of influenza, however, in order for the drug to be effective patients need to begin the dose within two days or fewer of getting the flu.

When it comes to the flu, prevention is key, so take care of yourself this winter.

Special Delivery

Baby, meat world. Yes, that’s “meat” as in “meat.”

Last week, a regular customer at

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

tribute of a decade 10 YEARS OF DEDICATION 10 COMMUNITY PATRONS P AY I N G T R I B U T E T O O U R E X E C U T I V E B O A R D

thursday t h e

community patron awardees

Dovid Bloom

Aron Solomon

FA R R O C K AWAY

CEDARHURST

Jay Gelman

Yakov Mirocznik

LAWRENCE

B AYS WAT E R

Moti Hellman

Moshe Schreiber

FA R R O C K AWAY

FA R R O C K AWAY

Ben Lowinger

Shulie Wollman

LAWRENCE

FA R R O C K AWAY

Michael Krengel

Joel Yarmak

WOODMERE

LAWRENCE

Ronald Lowinger

Lloyd Keilson

DINNER CHAIRMAN

DINNER CHAIRMAN

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s a n d s

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Lawrence: 334 Central Avenue • Lawrence, NY 11559 Far Rockaway: 144 Beach 9th Street • Far Rockaway, NY 11691 P 516.791.4444 x113 F 516.592.5643 E Dinner@Achiezer.org W Achiezer.org/Dinner

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a grocery in Fresno, California, had something special delivered. No, it wasn’t lamp chops or prime rib. She actually delivered a bouncing baby boy while shopping at the store.

Issamar Sepulveda, who co-owns El Parian with husband Juan Damian, said it was about 7:30 p.m. when the woman walked through the doors of the grocery and meat market.

The woman appeared fine at first.

The owners regularly let her take free items because she can’t always pay. On Tuesday evening, the woman poured a soda with ice for herself from the soda machine. But then, a few seconds later, she threw the soda in one direction and screamed, “Oh my G-d, I’m having my baby.”

By the time Sepulveda came out of her office, the baby was ready to enter the real world. Sepulveda sprung into action, summoning the cook, butcher and cashier to help deliver the baby.

The butcher took off his apron and used it to catch the baby. Sepulveda took out blankets she keeps in her office to keep the baby warm. She had the cashier run across the street to the mother’s apartment for a nasal aspirator.

Eventually, three ambulances and

several firefighters arrived. It was a relief to have professionals there to help, Sepulveda said.

According to Sepulveda, her newest customer looked “good.” He cried and was a bit chubby and heavy, she added. After visiting the new mother in the hospital, she was told his name: Toby.

Sepulveda’s store may have been a place of happiness for a few hours last week, but she doesn’t expect any more deliveries of this nature in the future. “Nothing like this” has every happened at her store, Sepulveda says. Now she’ll think twice when customers ask her if her stores delivers.

“I was going through a pretty bad depression,” he said. “I was kind of ready to give up and say [whatever] with it.”

His cousin, ever the wise one, gave him advice on how to clear his head: take a long walk. Lemanski listened – really well.

Keep Walking This man is made for walking.

Needing to get out of his funk, Chris Lemanski decided to walk.

And he kept walking.

The 26-year-old, who was born in California and now resides in Michigan, chose to walk straight across Europe – from Turkey to Portugal.

What made him embark on this 6,000 mile trek?

In April 2016, Lemanski decided on the journey after looking up trails and saw one that went from Portugal to Istanbul, Turkey. He then purchased a cheap ticket to Istanbul.

Lemanski made the trek in 18 months. Three of those months he was stuck in Morocco after he overstayed his visa. He was able to sneak out of the country and catch a boat to Germany where he continued his journey.

Walking is free but a man’s got to eat. Asked about how he survived for the year-and-a-half trek, Lemanski said, “I saved money, I bought a ukulele and played on the streets. I also accepted money through donations from my blog.” Generous, kindhearted people bought him beers and dinners.

One country stood out for its lack of generosity: Luxembourg. Even so, Lemanski admits that he was “smelling pretty bad at that point” and was “pretty hairy.”

What does 18 months of hitting the pavement do to you? “You realize you’re much stronger than you think you are,” Lemanski said. “You learn to tolerate the pain and discomfort,” he added. “You learn to enjoy it after a while.” Certainly a great way to clear your mind.

As for his next journey?

“Who knows? Maybe I’ll go to the Peace Corp. Maybe I’ll go to Germany to get my master’s or teach English in China,” he said.

Sounds like a walk on the wild side.

Tallest Tower

Tel Aviv may now be home to the world’s tallest tower. And it’s made of brick. The brick is a little more colorful than you may be used to seeing on buildings – Omer Tower is made completely out of Lego bricks.

The tower is named after Omer Sayag, who died in 2014 when he was just 8-years-old. Because Omer was sick with cancer for some time and had a weakened immune system, he wasn’t able to go to school or play with friends. Instead, he played with Lego and became an expert builder; his most masterful edifice was a replica of the Taj Mahal which he donated to the 2014 Lego exhibition.

For more than two weeks thousands of volunteers and many cranes worked on completing the towering tower, which was 36-meters tall, in Rabin Square. On December 27, 2017, the tower, composed of more than a half a million plastic bricks, was complete.

Now, it’s up to the Guinness World Records to verify that Omer’s Tower is the biggest Lego tower in the world. The previous record was set in 2015, at 35.05-meters, in Milan.

Looks like miles of Lego reaching towards the heavens.

2,600 Miles to Work

How far is your commute? Ten miles? Forty minutes? Two blocks?

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Tom Fowkes beats us all in the commuting department. The pediatric nurse from Pennsylvania commutes to work in Oakland, California, every week. Yes, he goes cross-country to clock in every day at the hospital.

Fowkes began this grisly commute nine years ago and, as he says, it “has changed my life.” Un-Der-StateMent of the Year.

When Fowkes was working as a nurse in Pennsylvania, he had to work three jobs, barely made ends meet and never saw his son because he was working all the time. Now that he works in Oakland, he says, “I am making California money and I live very nice.” He’s enjoying the higher wages that California offers and gets to live in Pennsylvania, where there’s a cheaper cost of living. The difference in wages is so big that even with the cost of flying across country four times a month, it’s a no-brainer.

“These are the highest paid nursing jobs on the planet,” he says, referring to his job at Kaiser. “I make more than some doctors do back home.”

Fowkes got his first taste of California several years ago when he came out on a travel assignment with

an agency. After his agency job ended, a friend introduced him to Kaiser, where he had an interview and got hired the same day.

In his early days at Kaiser, he would work six 12-hour shifts in a row and then fly back to Pennsylvania for two weeks. But “that would be kind of brutal. By the sixth day, I was kind of burnt out.” Nowadays, his schedule has softened a bit. He works 12-hour shifts on Monday and Tuesday every week and then 12-hour shifts every other weekend.

It works out to 36 hours a week and after he has worked his 72 hours, he heads back to his home near Pittsburgh.

His commute has become so routine that he doesn’t even think about it anymore.

“I can’t believe I’ve been doing it for 9 years. It seems like 4 or 5,” he said. “It’s changed my life. I spend more time with my son. And when I’m home and I don’t work, we can do things because I have money now.”

And, Fowkes adds, he also has a new $160,000 swimming pool.

DNA Lottery

One million dollars are up in the air in Thailand as the fate of a lottery ticket is to be decided by a DNA test.

Preecha Kraikruan, a 50-year-old teacher, said that he lost five lottery tickets which won a 30 million baht ($920,000) prize last month. It turns out, though, that a former cop, Charoon Wimon, 62, already claimed the prize. The millions of baht were already deposited into Charoon’s bank account. Police have frozen the assets.

But who really deserves the prize?

The government-run lottery, which is drawn twice a month, has a fanatical following in a kingdom where nearly all other forms of gambling are banned. Many players in the superstitious country turn to “lottery numerologists” to choose ticket numbers, often linked to special dates or

other auspicious events.

With both parties claiming the cash is rightfully theirs, forensic police are now stepping in to determine whose fingerprints match the ticket stubs.

“No one has been charged yet in this case as we have to wait for the DNA test results,” Krissana Sapdet, deputy Kanchanaburi provincial police commander, said.

A forensic official with the justice department said the results are expected next month.

The Royal Thai Police are investigating four other cases involving stolen lottery tickets throughout the kingdom. It’s possible the cases are connected in some way.

A similar case of a stolen lottery ticket took place in the United States in November when a customer accused a CVS employee of tricking him into handing over a milliondollar prize ticket in Illinois. The customer, Carlos Figueroa, filed a lawsuit against the CVS employee in November, which will be heard in court in March.

You know what they say: someone’s gotta win – it might as well be you.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the

Community Five Towns Sports Hockey League

U

nder the leadership of Rabbi Eli Brazil, Ira Schechter and Rabbi Steven Genachowski the 5 Towns Sports Hockey League is finishing up what has been a tremendous season. The season and playoffs were beyond amazing as many of the games were decided in

Learn & Live

T

he “write place” to be this past Sunday was at the Learn & Live program. This week R’ Yitzchok Spiegel presented “Getting it Write,” the melochos of kosaiv (writing) and mocheik (erasing). R’ Spiegel brought the melochos to life. This Sunday iy”H will be the “Cupcake Wars.”

For more information regarding L&L please email us at learnandlivefr@gmail. com or call our new hotline at 641-715-3800, pin 932191#.

the final seconds. The league, which is open to Pre 1A -8th grade boys in the Five Towns and surrounding areas, had 5 divisions with over 30 teams.

The ability to play competitive hockey in a structured environment makes this league such a great suc-

cess. Plans are underway for next season, which will begin in the second week of February. Thank you to the league sponsor, Traditions Eatery. We have made many updates to the program including distributing monthly giveaways, free Traditions gift cards, and installing a

new scoreboard and new Border Patrol safety boards.

For more information and to sign up for next season please go to www.5townssports.com.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

OHEL’s Dr. Norman Blumenthal Receives Nefesh International Esther Solomon Memorial Award

O

HEL Children’s Home and Family Services is extremely proud to announce that Dr. Norman Blumenthal, the Zachter Family Chair in Trauma and Crisis Counseling at OHEL and Director of the OHEL Miriam Center for Trauma, Bereavement and Crisis Response at the new OHEL Jaffa Family Campus, was honored with the Distinguished Nefesh International Esther Solomon Memorial Award for Outstanding contributions to field of Jewish Mental Health.

In just a few years, Dr Norman Blumenthal has rapidly led the vast expansion of OHEL’s trauma services impacting individuals, families and communities far and wide.

Most often working under the radar screen, without fanfare or public knowledge, OHEL’s specialized and multi-disciplined trauma team works 24/7 helping those affected by trauma rebuild their lives in the

immediacy, days, weeks and very often in the months after tragedy has struck – long after the ambulance

sirens and headlines have consumed the media pages.

Dr. David Pelcovitz, who holds the Gwendolyn and Joseph Straus Chair in Psychology and Jewish Education at the Azrieli Graduate School of Jewish Education, spoke of Dr. Blumenthal’s community leadership and personal dedication, always and immediately making himself available to address the most tragic and pressing of traumatic circumstances of others, while never losing his humanity, and never getting burnt out.

Dr. Blumenthal spoke of his involvement in the early days of Nefesh with Nosson Solomon and how today Jewish mental health professionals are both needed more than ever to address the pressing and challenges issues of a large community and how transformative the times are that we live in, where such professionals can thrive and grow like never before – an optimum clinical environment where they are provided cutting-edge high quality evidenced-based training and a cultural sensitive environment where trainings and seminars are no longer on Shabbos.

Very importantly, Dr. Blumenthal spoke of his understanding to see every client as a parsha bifnei atzmo and how he learned this from the teachings of his Rebbi Rabbi Aharon Kreiser, z”l, from Yeshiva University, where he studied

psychology. Dr. Blumenthal related, “We have many patients who come to our offices crying but at the end of the day everyone cries alone.” The Rav stressed the importance of discerning each patient’s distinct pain and needs and how every person should be seen as unique and not categorized or lumped together with others of comparable circumstance and diagnosis.

As OHEL moves to the new OHEL Jaffa Family Campus, the success of Dr. Blumenthal’s work with that of the OHEL Trauma Team he leads will only help to provide the foundation for further trauma outreach and support, locally and nationwide.

Dr. Blumenthal commented, “It is not that there is necessarily more trauma in our community, but that people are thankfully more proactive in getting the professional help they often need.”

OHEL’s Dr. Blumenthal is a highly sought-after speaker and has spoken at numerous OHEL events nationwide, whether addressing the stigma of mental health in the community, divorce, parenting or trauma. Additionally, Dr. Blumenthal continues to be one the most popular keynote speakers at many clinical workshops and seminars conducted by the Mel and Phyllis Zachter OHEL Institute.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

Gesher’s First Grade Siddur Party

T

his past Monday the first grade children at the Gesher Early Childhood Center celebrated a major milestone in their educational careers. The Siddur Party is an exciting event, recognizing the kriah achievements up to this point of the year. The legal holiday is a great opportunity for parents and grandparents to person-

ally experience the nachas of the children’s accomplishments.

The program began with heartfelt words from Mrs. Chava Bodner, program director, and Mrs. Dahlia Weiss, director of student support. They reflected on the tremendous effort and skill of Morah Elisheva Rabinowitz and her staff to help the children reach

this day. They also discussed some of the important aspects of tefilla and how it relates to children who are beginning to appreciate the written word.

Then the children came marching in for their performance and to receive their own personally engraved siddur. Clearly the children were excited

and were very prepared as they performed beautifully.

Afterwards the crowd, full of happy smiles, enjoyed the special siddur cake and other refreshments.

Gesher would like to thank the sponsors of the event: the Hertz family, the Goodman family, and the Koenig/Katz families.

Brachos Come Alive at Ohr Leah First Grade Kabbalas Siddurim at BYAM Academy

T

he students at Ohr Leah have been studying a unit on brachos. The first week they learned that the bracha of Hamotzi is made on bread made from the five grains: wheat, oats, rye spelt and barley. The girls also learned that one must bentch after eating bread. In order to put their learning into practice the girls made pizza for lunch!

They washed before they ate it and bentched when they were done. The second week was Mezonos week. This week the girls learned the difference between foods made from the five grains as a snack and those made into bread for a meal. They baked banana

muffins and enjoyed them for a snack after making the proper bracha! The girls are looking forward to learning about the bracha of borei pri hagafen when they will crush grapes to make grape juice. With the cold weather we’ve been having they’re also waiting to learn about Shehakol foods so we can make some hot soup.

Ohr Leah is still accepting applications for the 2018/2019 school year. Limited spots available. For more information about Ohr Leah please contact Suzanne Burger at 347-794-4940 or Leah Schwartz at 757-651-1129.

T

he first graders at BYAM reached a very important milestone last week when they received their very first siddur. The girls put on an amazing performance for their parents and grandparents and are very proud that they can now

read from a siddur. Rabbi Neuman and Mrs. Zytman spoke about the importance of tefillah. As one proud Bubby said, “This school is so warm.

I love the way they instill Yiddishkeit in our girls.”

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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Around the Community

HAFTR kindergarten students celebrated completing Sefer Bereishit with Rabbi Kupchik, menahel. They look forward to meeting Moshe Rabbeinu in Mitzrayim, receiving the Aseret Hadibrot, and learning all that unfolds in the upcoming parshiot in the next sefer. Mazel tov!

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

Nassau County Legislator-Elect Josh Lafazan Visits HANC HS

O

n Thursday, December 21, HANC High School hosted Mr. Josh Lafazan, Nassau County Legislator-Elect, representing District 18. Mr. Lafazan is the youngest government official in New York State and has served on the Syosset school board for five years.

Mr. Lafazan spoke to the Student Senate, Committee Chairpersons, and AP Government class. The focus of his talk was to show the importance of young people getting involved in community affairs and even politics. He stressed the idea that teens are never too young to make a change in society and that they should not be deterred by anyone who says that they are.

Participants were in awe of Mr. Lafazan’s determination, accomplishments, and his sense of humor. They asked questions and some were inspired to sign up for summer internships in his office.

Mr. Lafazan is a registered Independent who ran as a Democrat

in this last race. He also graduated from Cornell University, received a Master’s in education from Harvard University, and self-published a book about getting involved in politics.

He’s been a fighter against the opioid epidemic on Long Island. In the leg-

islature, Mr. Lafazan says he is going to use his extraordinary surplus of energy to advocate for changes like strict term limits and ethics reform.

Short-term, he wants common sense steps like solar panels on the roofs of county-owned buildings. He will be

sworn in on January 4th.

When asked what his aspirations were, Mr. Lafazan responded with his desire to become New York State Governor. We wish Mr. Lafazan the best of luck.

Eramo & Diamond Serve as City Council President and VP

T

his week marked a new term in the Long Beach City Council as Councilmember Anthony Eramo was elected City Council President, and Councilmember Chumi Diamond was sworn in for her first full term and will serve as City Council Vice President. Councilmember Diamond was sworn in by Congresswoman Kathleen Rice (D-4).

“It is an honor to serve as the City Council President and I am ready to take on this new role. Chumi and I will be advocates for fair leadership and will promote efficient government, smart development, and improved storm readiness. Long Beach is a strong and resilient community and everyone on the City Council is com-

mitted to doing their part to strengthen our city even more and to meet the needs of all who call Long Beach home,” said Eramo.

“I am very excited to get to work, serving all the residents of Long

Beach. It is an honor to now serve our diverse community as an elected member of this esteemed body. I will work hard to strengthen Long Beach, including ensuring responsible spending, strengthening our preparation for

powerful storms, and continuing to promote unity across our community,” said Diamond.

The two City Councilmembers are focused on prioritizing a number of issues facing Long Beach. Smart development and continued resiliency and recovery efforts from Superstorm Sandy are two major issues that they look forward to working on in the next term.

Eramo has served on the City Council since 2013 and most recently served as the Vice President. Diamond was first appointed to the Council in February 2017 and on November 7 joined fellow candidates John Bendo and Scott Mendel in sweeping the election for Democrats.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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Around the Community

Coding at HALB

M

rs. Rubel’s 5th grade technology class at HALB is learning how to code in Scratch. Scratch is an excellent introduction to a programming platform that was designed to teach kids to code in a visual way using code bricks, much like LEGO bricks. Students are coding and creating animated inter-

active games, short animated stories, and animated Chanukah cards.

Working as a team to code and share ideas they understand that collaboration, cooperation and respect are important values in the coding community and that learning how to code is all about how to help the community at-large.

Torah Comes to Life for Shulamith

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n December 19, Shulamith fourth grade girls visited the Living Torah Museum in Brooklyn. The students were excited to touch and explore the artifacts as they learned about Jewish history.

We were allowed to wear and hold jewelry and pottery as they learned about the archaeology and how these antiques were discovered underground and on the ocean floor. Then they were treated to an exhibit of all the animals in the Torah. A great learning experience was had by all.

Michal Ashville with 24 karat gold

Gila Yastrab and Ahava Goldberg holding a huge rock full of gold coins

YILB Annual Robert Chiger Scholarship Concert

T

he Young Israel of Long Beach will be holding their annual Scholarship Concert on Motzaei Shabbos, January 6, 2018 at 8:30 PM. The concert will feature the newest musical sensation Mordechai Shapiro who will entertain the audience with his vast repertoire of popular and chassidish Jewish music.

Once again this year’s concert will

take place at the Long Beach Hotel, 405 East Broadway, Long Beach, NY, which offered its facilities without charge in order to support the mission of the concert.

Rabbi Wakslak and Joseph Langer, a past shul president, conceptualized this scholarship concert nineteen years ago. Since that time, the proceeds from this scholarship concert has allowed many local com-

munity youngsters to attend yeshiva and/or overnight summer camps.

Twelve years ago, following the untimely petirah of Robert Chiger, z”l, a young vibrant member of the congregation, it was decided that his memory would be most appropriately perpetuated by re-naming this scholarship fund the “The Robert Chiger Scholarship Fund.” Bob had a unique connection with the youth of

the synagogue and cared for their religious and character development.

He was also a strong proponent of the YILB youth and sports programs.

This concert is strongly supported each year by Beth Chiger and Neil Sambrowsky and Beth’s children, Michele & Eric Ehrenhaus, Andrea & Ariel Gantz, Elliot & Chana Chiger, and David & Rachel Chiger.

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

The second grade at Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam had a Mother-Daughter Paint Night Melava Malka. The girls and their mothers bonded over their paint and canvas as they created their masterpieces. They enjoyed a special pizza party while their paintings dried. The achdus was palpable and they all had a great time.

SKA Production: “Journeys”

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he talented production cast and crew of the Stella K. Abraham High School for Girls channeled all their efforts since the beginning of the school year to make this year’s annual production one of the most memorable ones ever!

Production’s theme of “Journeys” was beautifully expressed through extraordinary crafted dances, musical and comical dramas, inspiring harmonies, a terrific band, and a unique and touching sign language segment. On motzei Shabbat, December 30, and Sunday evening, December 31, the new HALB campus auditorium was filled with mothers, sisters, aunts, grandmothers, teachers, friends, alumnae and eighth

grade applicants who watched this year’s production set a new standard of excellence.

Under the leadership of Mrs. Terri Wagner, SKA’s “First Lady of SKA Theatre,” Mrs. Suzy Libin and Mrs. Meredith Pyle, art directors, Mrs. Heidi Bressler, sign language teacher, Ms. Aliza Palgon, band advisor, Mrs.

Shana Leben, choir advisor, and Mrs. Dani Sudwerts, who assisted with dance, over 200 students participated in this amazing display of artistry.

As Mrs. Helen Spirn, Head of School, notes with pride, “Production is an amazing opportunity for our students and focuses on developing and presenting the talents with which

Hashem has blessed our girls. Each one is able to build her sense of self esteem while enjoying the experience of working with a group and getting close with girls in all grades.”

Every girl who participated in SKA’s Production ‘17 – in any way – shone!

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

Around the Community

O

n Sunday, December 24 at Yeshiva of Central Queens, over 100 students and their parents attended the YCQ Sunday morning Parent-Child Learning Program. This ongoing event has brought many speakers to share some chizuk with students and their parents.

Eitan Katz, world-renowned singer, spoke to the students and their families about how he got started in music and about the spiritual essence of song, as well as the importance of being a proud Jew. As a son of a chazzan he first began singing in his father’s choirs at age four. He spent part of his life in Los Angeles until his family made aliyah to Ra’anana, and then eventually back to LA when his father received another job as a chazzan. He attended yeshiva in LA, Baltimore, and Israel and currently resides in Far Rockaway.

It wasn’t until age 16 that he be-

gan playing guitar. Katz said what he loves about singing and playing music is that “a certain sensitivity comes out when a person sings. Young, old, it doesn’t matter. Something comes out in song that is otherwise not easy to come out.” He has entertained all over the world. He told his audience how he sang in places like Johannesburg where he sung at a safari, and in London, South America, Israel and Canada. Music is something that fills our lives with spirituality and connects us to Hashem, Torah and all types of people.

Singer and YCQ rebbe Ophie Nat joined Katz during the program. He invited all to join in and sing, and encouraged the students that from a very young age, they should always be proud to be a Jew, that they should always remember what a zchut it is to be a Jew. The program ended with song requests by students and singing by all.

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He had already spent thousands of dollars fighting the legal battle, and the final day of the court case, when the judge would make his decision, was coming soon.

Ari had done everything he could in the physical realm.

It was now time to bring in spiritual backup. Knowing about the Shotze Rebbe’s promise, that anyone who took upon themselves a kabbalah at his kever would receive his assistance, Ari signed up for Tehillim Kollel. Ari knew that the ehrliche men who davened the entire sefer Tehillim at the tzion of the Shotze Rebbe every day of the year would be the right emissaries for his special, vital plea. Ari took on the kabballah to daven the brachos with kavanah every day.

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

Before Chanukah, Chazaq ran a toy donation drive that brought over a thousand toys and countless smiles to the young patients of the Maimonides Medical Center and Cohen Children’s Medical Center

HANC HS Panel and Mini Fair

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n the evening of Wednesday, December 20, the Hebrew Academy of Nassau County was honored to welcome representatives from eight prestigious colleges and universities to its 3rd Biennial College Panel and Mini Fair for all high school students and their parents.

Organized by Ms. Karen Sheff, Director of College Guidance, and Mrs. Marisa Gelb, Assistant Director of College Guidance, the event provided attendees with an insider’s look at critical information about applying to college. During the panel, which was moderated

by Ms. Sheff, representatives from Brandeis University, The Cooper Union, Hofstra

University, Queens College, SUNY Albany, SUNY Binghamton, Touro’s Lander Colleges, and Yeshiva University answered questions about the selection process for admission to their institution.

Panel members provided

insightful information about academic and standardized test requirements, appropriate high school course loads, and which components of the application their establishment focuses on during the admission process. The

panel also discussed Jewish life on campus and the variety of opportunities available to students at the various institutions.

This event culminated in three sessions in which the representatives met with

students and their parents in small groups to answer questions regarding their specific college or university. Students were able to introduce themselves to the representatives, discuss their personal goals, and find out insider information about admissions. This event proved to be a huge success with over 150 people in attendance. Following the program, students and parents of all grade levels remarked how informative and valuable the program was in helping them navigate the college process.

Yasher koach to Ms. Sheff and Mrs. Gelb and to the amazing student volunteers who assisted throughout the evening.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

A COLOSSAL TORAH VOID The Torah World and Lomdei Dirshu Bemoan the Loss of Maran HaGaon HaRav Aharon Leib Shteinman, zt”l

Harav Shteinman (center) at Dirshu’s Siyum Hashas, Summer 2012 in Eretz Yisroel

By Chaim Gold

T

he passing of HaGaon HaRav Aharon Leib Shteinman, zt”l, has left Klal Yisrael bereft. Rav Shteinman was a gaon in Torah, a gaon in tzidkus, and a gaon in hanhaga and leadership. He embodied the grandeur and beauty of a synthesis of Torah, middos tovos, absolute selflessness, and mesiras nefesh for the klal to the extent that his own personal cheshbonos and negius didn’t exist.

One of the most deeply moving images of him that impacted the hearts and minds of all was his entry three

I

years ago into the Dirshu World Siyum of Daf HaYomi B’Halacha (marking the completion of the entire Mishnah Berurah) in 2015 at the Nokia Yad Eliyahu Stadium in Tel Aviv.

He was over 100-years-old. As the diminutive gadol slowly made his way to his seat at the head, the crowd of lomdei Torah could not contain their excitement. The eruption of simcha and ecstasy defies description as all craned their necks to catch a glimpse of the Rosh Yeshiva’s holy countenance.

There was a hush as Rav Shteinman, in his soft voice, cited a Chazal that says, “A gathering of tzaddikim is

good for them and good for the world.

A gathering of reshaim is bad for them and bad for the world.” Rav Shteinman said forcefully, “It is good to make gatherings like this! They strengthen us all, especially in [difficult times] like this. In this zechus may all of us merit kol tuv!”

Every step took effort, but he made the effort and was literally mafkir himself, his strength, his pain, his honor and his time, for his beloved Klal Yisrael and beloved Torah. If it would strengthen Torah, Rav Shteinman was there. That is why he attended and addressed so many Dirshu and Acheinu

events and gave so much of his time to advise and guide the hanhala of Dirshu on virtually every major policy issue and new initiative and program that they undertook.

Klal Yisrael has lost a leader, guide, and shield. Together with Klal Yisrael, lomdei Dirshu and hanhalas Dirshu and Acheinu mourn and bemoan the irreplaceable loss of our father, our Rebbi and guide. We will never forget Rav Shteinman’s unique combination of tzidkus, temimus, chochma and astuteness that he utilized to guide us together with an entire generation.

Mi yitein lanu temuraso!

Torah, Torah and More Sweet Torah Learning!

t was a powerful and memorable moment and message. At Dirshu’s 10th anniversary celebration at Yad Eliyahu Stadium in Tel Aviv, the entire assemblage sat at the edge of their seats latching onto every word of the venerated Rosh Yeshiva, Rav Aharon Leib Shteinman. In his message, Rav Shteinman asked why Chizkiyahu Hamelech was punished for not saying shira after Hashem destroyed the army of Sancherev in one night. “Was Chizkiyahu not the same king who brought unprecedented Torah learning to Klal Yisrael? Is not Torah the greatest shira in the world?” Rav Shteinman answered that witnessing the great miracle from

Acheinu hanhalah and bochurim visiting with Harav Shteinman, 2009

Hashem should have given him an even greater understanding of Hash-

em’s greatness. It therefore should have spurred him to sing shira. Every

new hasaga that a Jew gains into the greatness of Hashem requires a new, higher level of shira. Rav Shteinman implied that the more we grow in Torah and the more Torah is learned and understood, the greater our requirement is to express our thanks to Hashem!

At that gathering and on countless other occasions, Rav Shteinman’s message was always one of growing in Torah. For Rav Aharon Leib, anyone and any organization that was enabling more people to learn Torah, know Torah, and acquire new chalakim in Torah was something for which he said shira and encouraged others to say shira as well.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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Around the Community

Why Rav Shteinman Encouraged Daf HaYomi B’Halacha

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hen the Daf HaYomi B’Halacha program was starting, he gave guidance that provided insight into his thinking. He said, “A person must strengthen himself in learning halacha every day because the yetzer hara comes every day. Countless times each day, the yetzer hara tries to pull a person away from Hashem and the only antidote is to strengthen limud haTorah and limud halacha!”

In a conversation with Dirshu’s Nasi, Rav Dovid Hofstedter, held at Rav Aharon Leib’s humble apartment in Bnei Brak, Rav Aharon Leib told Rav Hofstedter that being able to enrich Klal Yisrael requires tremendous siyata diShmaya. He then cited the well-known Gemara (Me-

Harav Shteiman attending the Dirshu Nesius of Daf HaYomi B’Halachah gathering, 2015

gillah 28), “We learned in the beis medrash of Eliyahu that one who learns halacha every day is assured a place in Olam Habah, as it says, ‘Halichos olam Lo [the ways of the world are His]’

– do not read the word halichos, but rather halachos.”

Rav Shteinman asked, “Why didn’t the pasuk just say the word ‘halachos’? Why did it have to say halichos in such a way that a drasha is nec-

essary in order to learn that it means halachos?” Rav Shteinman answered, “The way a person walks in this world and where he will be in the next world are all dependent on how he observes

halacha. When a Yid lives in accordance with halacha and all of his halichos, all of his comings and goings in this world, are in accordance with the Torah, he will merit that he will also walk in Olam Habah!”

Without a doubt, however, Rav Shteinman’s love and guidance was provided because he so deeply believed that the only way to achieve success in ruchniyus, in chinuch, and in any spiritual undertaking is to cultivate a love of Torah, a love of the sweetness of Torah.

“How does one cultivate love of Torah and the ability to taste the sweetness of Torah? By learning more and more Torah.” Rav Shteinman elucidated, “The more one learns, the sweeter it becomes!”

THE IMPERATIVE TO CHAP AREIN AND ENGAGE IN KIRUV! Rav Aharon Leib’s Message to Lakewood Via Live Satellite Hookup at Acheinu’s Lakewood Asifa at the Bais Faiga Hall, 2010:

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orai verobasi, in our times, the most important thing is zikui harabbim. The Chovos Halevavos says that a person can work on himself and reach such heights to the extent that he can attain the spiritual level of a malach, an angel. Still, this [exalted level] does not reach the lofty level that one can attain through zikui harabbim.

There has never been as many baalei teshuva as there is today, in our times. What happened? What has changed? I think the answer is because Mashiach is almost here.

Once Mashiach comes there will be no more opportunity for us to bring them back. The message to us is that before Mashiach comes we must chap arein, seize the opportunity. We can still save them.

Afterwards it will be too late!

This is why Hashem has created a special desire among not yet frum people, [to come closer to Hashem]. He has made it easier

Harav Chizkiyahu Yosef Mishkovsky, moderating for Harav Aharon Leib Shteinman

to become a baal teshuvah today.

Once upon a time it was extremely hard. To make a baal teshuvah was akin to a kriyas yam suf—a splitting of the sea. Today the nesha-

mos come closer much more easily, much quicker. Otherwise, chas v’chalilah, these neshamos will be finished, they will be lost.

Therefore now is the time to

chap arein. Baruch Hashem there are Yidden who are involved in [kiruv]. There are those who have made this their area of expertise their life’s mission. Baruch Hashem because of them, we merit to hear every day about more and more Yidden coming back from the worst of places. All they need is a small push [and they return].

It does not happen, however on its own. We have to do something too! We cannot think it will happen completely on its own.

All of the other tactics in kiruv do not help. The ikar, the main thing, is Torah. Only with Torah, through learning Torah [with them] can we be mekarev. With Torah we are mekarev Yidden to the Ribbono Shel Olam so that they will not remain lost forever.

May Hashem help that we will be able to be mekarev, bring close, as many Yidden as we can to Hashem and may we be zoche that they do not chalilah become lost forever.

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Around the Community

Father-Daughter Learning By: Nava Yastrab, MSH ‘19

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he tenth annual Father-Daughter learning event took place this week at Midreshet Shalhevet, and it was a blast. With a delicious Carlos & Gabby’s lunch and an amazing speaker, the girls and dads learned a lot and enjoyed the meaningful experience. After morning classes, MSH students met their fathers for lunch.

Rabbi Efrem Schwalb of Eitz Chaim of Dogwood Parkin West Hempstead was our scholar-in-residence for the day. He opened the topic and introduced the sources, but then allowed the fathers and daughters the opportunity to investigate the sources for themselves and come up with their

own conclusions to his question. Since the learning day was just four days

“Vayechi, I am alive.”

-Mrs. Gayle Sassoon, December 31, 2017 Page 58

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before Asarah B’Tevet, the topic was why Jews really fast on Asarah B’Tevet and what actually happened on that day. The girls learned a lot with their fathers and grew closer to what it truly means to be a Jew. “I had a really nice time learning and going into the ideas being spoken about! It was really great that MSH gave us this opportunity and even greater that we got to share it with

our fathers!” said Avygayl Zucker, MSH ’19. Yitz Elman, father of Rivkie, said, “It was a great shiur, we had a great time, and it was a great bonding opportunity for us. Home run.” His daughter, Rivkie, noted, “This year’s father-daughter learning was interesting, fun, and provided both me and my father new ideas about the upcoming fast. All of this plus the dad jokes made father-daughter learning a hit.”

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

Yeshiva Ketana of Long Island to Celebrate 22nd Annual Dinner

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e look forward to coming together on Monday, January 8 for the Yeshiva Ketana of Long Island Annual Dinner. As always, this event gives us the opportunity to show our support for YKLI and those people who are instrumental in providing our talmidim with an exceptional chinuch. Given our commitment to recognizing each child’s uniqueness, there are myriad individuals who are invested in the academic and personal growth of each boy.

The Dinner provides us with a forum to express our appreciation for the rebbeim, moros, teachers, administrators, service providers, and staff as well as parents and community partners who use their talents to the fullest each and every day.

Honorees Rabbi and Mrs. Yaakov Morgenbesser, recipients of the Harbotzas Torah Award, are singularly focused on making learning joyful and accessible for all children. For twelve years, Rabbi Morgenbesser has infused his 1st grade classroom with warmth and excitement. Armed with pedagogical expertise, Rabbi Morgenbesser combines his educational acumen with passion to provide his 1st graders with the skills and the desire to grow in Torah and mitzvos. Mrs. Racheli Morgenbesser, who spent several years teaching YKLI pre-school, radiates an ahavas Yisroel and a love of learning. Together, Rabbi and Mrs. Yaakov Morgenbesser are instrumental in transmitting Torah to the next generation and this makes them truly deserving of the Harbotzas Torah Award.

The job of chinuch does not reside exclusively within the Yeshiva. YKLI parents provide valuable guidance and support and we look forward to highlighting the efforts of those couples whose contributions have made an indelible impact on the Yeshiva.

This year the Yeshiva is pleased to honor a couple who have chosen

to take leadership roles in the Yeshiva and our community. Dr. & Mrs. Nachum Augenbaum, parents of 7th grader Gavriel, 9-year-old Rachel in TAG, and 5-year-old Rikki, are true partners in the chinuch of their children. Dr. Augenbaum, a dentist, has been a devoted Board Member of YKLI while simultaneously supporting the Yeshiva’s efforts on behalf of every talmid. Mrs. Perri Augenbaum, homemaker, has shared her time and talents as part of the Senior Presidium of the YKLI Women’s League for five years. Nachum has also served as TAG’s Dinner and Journal Chairman.

He is actively involved in his shul, Congregation Machzikei Torah of Far Rockaway, graciously hosting many of their events.

Looking back at Gavriel’s accomplishments through the years at YKLI, the Augenbaums are quick to highlight the fantastic relationship their son has had, and continues to maintain, with his outstanding rebbeim. Dr.

SJP is not as revolutionary as one might think. We used to have another name for it: Normal.

Page 82

Augenbaum notes: “The enthusiasm and love for learning that is generated in the classroom is transferred to our home – where my son and I enjoy learning together.” Given their contributions to YKLI and to the Klal, it is a privilege to name Dr. and Mrs. Nachum Augenbaum the recipients of the Kesser Shem Tov Award.

Mr. & Mrs. Alex Shulman, proud parents of 1st grader Moshe Chaim, will be presented with the Young Leadership Award in recognition of their concerted efforts on behalf of YKLI. . When you speak with the Shulmans what comes across right away is their passion for a Torah chinuch for their children Moshe Chaim and Maya Bracha, a 2nd grader in TAG. Alex is originally from the Soviet Union, immigrating to America when he was just 7-years-old with little exposure to a Jewish education. He grew up in Detroit, Michigan, and credits the Chabad there for his bar mitzvah and slowly become closer to Yiddishkeit.

Once graduating Ezra Academy, Alex continued learning in Yeshiva Ohr Sameach in Eretz Yisrael and currently learns each morning at Sh’or Yoshuv. Alex is the founding partner of Shulman & Hill PLLC specializing in Workers Compensation and Personal Injury. Mrs. Shulman grew up in New York and is a speech therapist.

Being raised in more traditional homes, the Shulmans are quick to af-

firm how grateful they are that their son has the benefit of Torah chinuch in an unparalleled warm and loving environment, where he is valued and recognized. In their own words, the Shulmans are amazed that their son is greeted with a broad smile in the hallways, as he passes other rabbeim and morahs who know his name and wish him a “good morning.” Moshe Chaim doesn’t want to miss a day of Yeshiva and eagerly boasts: “I know 96 shorashim!” “YKLI is truly like a family,” says Mrs. Shulman. “I am comforted by that fact as I send Moshe Chaim off to yeshiva each morning.”

The Yeshiva is proud to present the Shulmans with Young Leadership Award, as they are true role models in their passion for harbatzas Torah, community involvement and commitment to Torah education.

The Journal Dinner, at the beautiful Sands Atlantic Beach, is the ultimate experience of achdus. By joining us for the cocktail hour at 7PM, enjoying the Dinner and Honoree Presentations at 8PM, and remaining for Maariv and dessert, you will be conveying your appreciation for the individuals who are directly responsible for your child’s chinuch. The program promises to be an exciting one, and your participation as well as your presence from the cocktail hour through bentching, which will be at 9PM, will contribute to the evening’s success.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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Around the Community

YOSS Celebrates Sefer Bereishis

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he talmidim at Yeshiva of South Shore’s Hollander Early Childhood Center went on a trip...down memory lane. The students in the nursery, kindergarten and pre-1A classes reviewed and celebrated Sefer Bereishis in many different ways.

The nursery students unpacked a suitcase with their moros and found objects that reminded them about each parsha. The boys were so excited when they remembered the animals on Noach’s teiva, the ladder in Yaakov’s dream and the amazing creations from Hashem during Ma’aseh Bereishis.

The talmidim also participated in fun siyumim. The nursery and kindergarten children dressed as different people or objects from the parshiyos and shared pictures they created of their favorite memory from Sefer Bereishis.

The pre-1A children had a more “chashuv” siyum in

the YOSS Elementary School.

Dressed in dark pants and white shirts, the boys joined Rebbe Eli Herzberg for singing, dancing and review questions.

This Sefer Bereishis experience strengthened memories and encouraged creativity, self-esteem and teamwork.

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

Shulamith Shabbaton Warms Students’ Spirits

T

he extremely frigid temperatures and arrival of snowy weather couldn’t quench the fiery spirits of the seventh and eighth grade students of Shulamith School for Girls as they enjoyed their annual Shabbaton this past weekend, Shabbat Parshat Vayechi.

On Friday morning, the girls enjoyed a challah baking activity led by Mrs. Phyllis Russek. They welcomed the opportunity to daven for cholim at the auspicious moment of hafrashat challah and happily brought

their challot home after school ended.

The Shabbaton took place at the Young Israel of Lawrence-Cedarhurst, where the girls enjoyed singing Kabbalat Shabbat and davening Maariv in their beautifully decorated dining area. After a delectable seudat Shabbat catered by Mauzone, Morah Chani Pollak regaled the students with an incredible story of hashgacha pratit that had everyone gasping in amazement.

On Shabbat day, the girls davened Shacharit in the main minyan

of the shul and were then privileged to be addressed by both Rabbi Yaakov Trump and Rebbetzin Suri Teitelbaum. Additional entertainment on Shabbat were divrei Torah, a choir presentation, various circle games, and plenty of singing.

After a short afternoon of visiting friends in the neighborhood, students reconvened for seudah shlishit. The seventh graders were hosted by the Gelbtuchs, while the eighth graders enjoyed the hospitality of the Turner and Weiss families.

After Shabbat, the seventh and eighth graders gathered again, this time in the Shulamith gym, where they were joined by the rest of the middle division. The incomparable Yang Xiao D impressed everyone with his dizzying, dazzling display of balancing and spinning the most surprising objects. The evening also included dance presentations by eighth graders, a mini Chinese Auction that raised over $600 for the Azan Family Fire Fund, and a seudat melava malka of “Pizza with a Chinese twist.”

pants may become members at the door. The event is co-sponsored by Holy Chef, Jerusalem Life and Our Binyamin.

At 6:30 PM the same night a Torah lecture will be held for other adults not attending the cooking event on Bettering Oneself and One’s

Life through the Weekly Torah Reading by Matatia Chetrit.

To reserve a seat for cooking event please call 718-263-8102. The MJO Shaar HaShamayim Synagogue is located at 112-21 72nd Avenue, Forest Hills, NY 11375. www. mjony.org. info@mjony.org.

Sushi & Chinese Cooking Event

A

fter two successful cooking events in past months – the Great Challah Bake and the Great Hanukkah Bake – expert Chef Meyer Wakneen & the MJO Community will hold an event teaching kosher ancient Oriental Cooking. On January 7 at 5:30 PM he will teach secrets of making sushi and Chinese chicken at the MJO Center in Forest Hills, New York, at 112-21 72nd Ave. The Great Sushi & Chinese Cookout Event is an opportunity for women to unite together for an evening of hands-on sushi (vegan & fish California Roll) & Chinese chicken demonstrations, making and tasting.

Meyer Wakneen is a former Executive Chef of the Essex House Hotel

in NYC specializing in high-end banquets and French pastries.

The event will be held Sunday, January 7 at the MJO Center. Doors open at 5:30 pm. The program starts at 6:00 pm. Women and girls 10 years & up are invited. It is also an opportunity to meet other women with similar interests and for women to interact & with their daughters.

The MJO brings it together – providing all ingredients. Women make and take home their food. Chef Wakneen will also conduct a short intro to knife cutting techniques. A small gift will be provided to participants. Refreshments will be served. Admission is free for MJO members and $10 per person for non-members. Partici-

Please say Tehillim for Shilat bas Louza Aliza, Daniel ben Louza Aliza, Yosef ben Ahuva Masuda May they have a refuah sheleima and know no more tzaar.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

A Man of Action

By Rabbi Shmuel Kamenetzky

M

y grandfather, Rav Binyamin Kamenetzky, zt”l, was a man of action. Some of his actions were bold and grand, such as founding what is today the largest shul in the neighborhood, a 61-year-old yeshiva, and a renowned girls’ school. Many of his actions were also smaller and directed at regular individuals. He didn’t wait for any specific opportune time but rather jumped right in as soon as he saw a chance to help someone in need.

I vividly remember the scene in my house approximately 15 years ago. It was a typical morning, and I was out

of yeshiva. I was sitting in the kitchen finishing breakfast, and Zaidy walked through the front door, as he always did on a whim. He used to come by my parents’ house all the time, and we always enjoyed his good company. He sat with us and schmoozed like a regular grandfather with his grandchildren. My mother welcomed him in and immediately offered him a cup of coffee. “Sure!” he responded. I can still remember his trademark response, in which you can hear his smile through his voice.

He accepted the coffee, made a bracha, took a sip, and then, like a man

on a mission, asked a question which seemed to be on his mind for a while.

“I need to find a shidduch for Shlomo Unger*. Maybe you know someone?” he asked my mother, while looking at me for any leads I could give as well.

“Tell me about him,” my mother responded.

“He’s such a fine boy, from the finest family. His mother is….. His father is….

He is a true ben Torah, learns in Sh’or Yoshuv in the morning, and he’s getting his degree in accounting soon. We must find him someone.”

My mother thought for a moment and then, with a smile on her face, exclaimed, “I got it. How about Miriam Handler*.”

“Great Idea,” Zaidy responded. Forgetting about his coffee, my grandfather got up from the table, walked over to the kitchen phone, pulled out his “diary” (his phone number notebook.

Remember those?), found the number, and started dialing. “Hello Mrs. Unger! This is Rabbi Kamenetzky. I have an excellent girl that I want Shlomo to meet…..”

A few weeks later, the couple was engaged.

When people talked, he not only listened – he acted. If someone had come to discuss a town problem, a few minutes after the conversation ended, he would be on the phone with a local councilman. If it was a visa or immigration issue, he would not let the person leave until he had called Washington. If it was a boy needing a place to learn, he would be on the phone to the principal.

I think his inspiration came from a story that he had heard from his father, my great-grandfather, Rav Yaakov Kamenetzky, zt”l.

When Rav Yaakov was a very young student, my great-grandfather, known as Yaakov Dalhinover, traveled to the famed Slabodka Yeshiva to learn. He was considered a prodigy and many students wanted to be his chavrusa, study partner. Among them was an older, quite respectable fellow who asked to learn with him for the upcoming winter semester. For some reason, my great-grandfather did not want to learn with him. The fellow was highly regarded and young Yaakov could not say no. Rather than embarrass the man, my great-grandfather came up with a way out.

The dean of the Yeshiva known as the Alter of Slabodka was helping bolster a yeshiva in Maltch whose Rosh Yeshiva had left. My great-grandfather figured that if he stopped learning someone would notice, word would get

to the dean, and he’d be “transferred” to the yeshiva in Maltch. The older fellow would find someone else and Yaakov would be able to return to the Slabodka Yeshiva, in the spring.

The next part of the story, my great-grandfather heard decades later when he was already a rav in Tzitivyan.

Every Shabbos, the Alter, Rabbi Nosson Tzvi Finkel, would eat with about thirty guests. During the meal the Alter’s son-in-law, Rav Isaac Sher, approached him. R’ Sher had noticed that my grandfather, Yankel Dolnhiver had been wasting his time lately and was concerned. Rav Sher asked his fatherin-law, “What’s going to be with the young prodigy, Yankel Dolhinover?

He’s not learning the way he used to.

Maybe he needs a change of pace. Maybe he should join the elite group that you are sending to Maltch?” The Alter was quiet. He just listened.

Rav Isaac was about to leave when a guest of the Alter, a distinguished rav (who told this story to my great-grandfather), stopped him. He was curious.

“Who is this brilliant Yankel Dolhinover with whom you are concerned?” he asked.

“If you want to know who Yankel Dolhinover is,” said R’ Isaac, “just watch my father-in-law. He will finish the meal, bentsh, and then he will enter the Bais Medrash. He will go over and talk to a young boy with glasses. That boy will be Yaakov Dolhinover. Guaranteed.”

Indeed, it was. The Alter spoke to my great-grandfather and suggested he go to Maltch together with 40 other elite students.

My great- grandfather used to say about his rebbe, “He not only listened; he acted upon the request almost immediately.”

My Zaidy emulated that attribute he learned from his father. Rav Binyamin didn’t just recognize opportunities to build. He didn’t just have ideas, listened and he acted.

Rabbi Shmuel Kamenetzky is a grandson of Rav Binyamin. In addition to serving as a rebbe in the Lakewood Cheder, he is currently working on the sefer Ish Yemini, a collection of hundreds of Torah thoughts and speeches given by Rav Binyamin Kamenetzky, zt”l, over the course of his lifetime, and an English biography encompassing the amazing story of his life and diverse accomplishments. For more information please write to sk@rbklegacy.org. *names have been changed...but the couple is indeed happily married!

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community The Five Towns-Far Rockaway community braved frigid weather conditions to attend the Chanukas Habayis for the new mikvah dedication of Binyan Be’er Rochel Mikvah Sorah this week. The event was graced by attendees from our community, rabbis, donors and government officials.

PHOTO CREDIT: NAFTOLI GOLDGRAB

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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Around the Community

Chaverim Five Towns and Rockaway Holds Annual Member Dinner

L

ast Tuesday, December 26th, over 40 Chaverim Five Towns and Rockaway members gathered at Chaverim’s Annual Member Appreciation Dinner held at Hapina in Cedarhurst. The annual dinner celebrates Chaverim’s members, all of whom are volunteers who give hours of their time weekly to help motorists in need.

Before the dinner, Hempstead Town Councilman Anthony P. D’Esposito addressed the members and described his great admiration for Chaverim: “I joined my Chaverim this evening to thank them for their hard work, dedication and commitment to the Five Towns and Town of Hempstead community.”

Chaverim is a grassroots organization founded to assist stranded motorists and elderly and handicapped individuals. Chaverim Five Towns and Rockaways handles hundreds of calls each month - all by volunteers who leave the safety of their own homes to help others.

Tis the season to count our blessings – Five Towns neighbors should count Chaverim Five Towns as one of those blessings.

A special thanks to Rabbi Daniel Glatstein from Kehillas Ahavas Yisrael who gave an inspiring D’var Torah to the members about the importance of the work they do for the community.

Next on the agenda was the highly anticipated annual entertainment, which this year was Simon Hyman doing a full class act of Simon Sez and other hands on games which left everyone in hysterical laughter.

Among the prizes were tickets to a MLB game, gift cards to Best Buy and Amazon as well as gift cards to Hapina.

Afterwards, Cedarhurst Mayor Benjamin Weinstock spoke to the members and gave Chaverim a plaque.

We received over 3,000 calls, a record for Chaverim, with over 90% of the calls being responded to in 5 minutes or less.

In order to better serve you, we need to cover our budget and get new equipment. Please help support us by making a donation to our fundraiser campaign (https://thechesedfund. com/cause/chaverim-of-the-fivetowns-and-rockaways-4027) so that

we can continue to help you in your time of need.

CHAVERIM is a 501c3 100% volunteer organization. We also run “Defensive Driving Class” programs as well as a few car seat safety inspection events throughout the year.

We are planning on teaching new drivers in high schools throughout the community many basic car functionalities as well as how to change flats and boost cars. Chaverim has 3 upcoming defensive driving classes scheduled for 2018. The dates are January 15th, May 14th and July 16th.

Time: 7:00 PM at The Marion & Aaron Gural JCC, 207 Grove Avenue in Cedarhurst. For more info please go to http://chaverim5t.org/defensivedriving-class-sign-up-2018/or send an email to info@chaverim5t.org or call us at 516.331.1460 For emergency help call the Chaverim helpline @ 718.337.1800 or send us a Twitter direct message “@ Chaverim5t” with your name, location, problem and phone number and a dispatcher will get back to you ASAP. Chaverim Info line: 516.331.1460 P.O. Box 701, Lawrence, NY 11559

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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Thousands of Women Join Together In Supporting Azan Family

By M. Lowinger

I

t’s crazy cold outside, but that doesn’t stop an estimated six thousand women from gathering together at the Palace Ballroom in Brooklyn to support the Azan family, who have recently been the victims of a tragic and devastating fire. And despite the icy weather on Sunday night, it’s incredibly heartwarming to watch groups of determined women emerging from a steady stream of cars and buses and converging on this site on a frigid evening when most people would

rather be snug and cozy indoors.

The event, which features a combination of chizuk and tefilla, also

their devastating loss. According to an organizer of the event, “Every penny is going directly to help the

“Vayechi," she announces in a quivering voice. "I am alive."

serves as a fundraiser for the Azan family, to help them recover from

family and all expenses were privately sponsored.” The organizer,

who wishes to remain anonymous, tells me later that aside from the thousands that attended the event, another 15,000 (!) watched the livestream, and 5,000 listened in on Kol Haloshon. (He also apologizes to the hundreds who were turned away at the door simply because the venue was full to capacity.) Those are staggering numbers, testimony to our community’s resolve to share in each other’s pain and help those faced with tragedy.

“Why are we here tonight in this

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

bitter cold?” asks Mrs. Sara Sprei, who opens the program. “Tonight is a night of chizuk and inspiration.

We are here to show the Ribbono Shel Olam that we are all one. This family is not alone. We are here to ease their pain.”

Mrs. Chana Werdiger leads the audience in reciting Tehillim, and she is followed by Rabbanit Ahuva Azan, mother of Yossi. We watch this brave woman whose life has just been radically altered speak with incredible conviction and emunah. She tells us that her son Yossi’s 45th birthday is this week and speaks about how special he is.

“I could talk for hours,” she says, “about what Yossi did for me.”

Despite the fact that she speaks in Ivrit, every single word resonates in this vast and cavernous auditorium. In a voice filled with emotion she shouts, “Abba, todah! Todah Abba, todah!” publicly declaring her acceptance of her difficult and painful nisayon. “Our children,” she explains, “are not really ours.

They are not shelanu. They are matanot from Hakodosh Boruch Hu. So we can’t complain and we can’t ask questions. Ain li she’ailot.

Mamash lo.”

Rabbanit Azan describes how she prays for her children’s welfare daily. She even shares with us that this year on erev Rosh Hashana her jewelry was stolen by an Arab working in her home. But she didn’t complain. Instead, she said to Hashem, “Zeh lo norah. This should be a kapparah.”

But Hashem had other plans.

And tearfully, she shouts, “Hashem notan Hashem lokach, yehi Shem Hashem mevorach.” Women are sniffling and wiping their tears, amazed at this woman’s powerful and unwavering emunah at such a painful time. “Tomorrow,” she says, “Yossi will be woken from his induced coma and will be informed of the magnitude of his loss.” So she publicly asks Hashem to give him the “koach to withstand it.” The scene is unimaginable and we all silently pray for this family to rebuild itself somehow. As for herself, she acknowledges that her tafkid now is “l’orer u’l’hitorer” her fellow Jews.

“Each of us,” she suggests, “should

take upon ourselves a small mitzvah.”

Rabbanit Ozeiri leads us in Tehillim once more and focuses on the achdus of the night’s event. “Look around the room,” she says. “What do you see? Ashkenazim? Sefardim? Chassidim? Tonight we see klal Yisroel, a magnificent bouquet of klal Yisroel. Our diversity is our beauty. We are all one.” Alluding to the conflicting emotions of the past week, she says, “We saw flames of pain and flames of joy. On Zos Chanuka we got a message that we are all one in pain and joy, united in pain and in celebration.”

Mrs. Leah Rubashkin, a contemporary role model of sterling emunah and bitachon, receives a hero’s welcome at the asifa. She graciously thanks klal Yisroel for their tefil-

of those 180 girls,” she says, “were the last Tehillim that needed to be said.” She urges us not to stop davening. “Let’s not allow this energy and emotion and excitement fade away. We can do it and we will!”

There’s a brief choir performance, and then we hear from Rebbetzin Nechama Klughauft, daughter of the Sekulener Rebbe, who says she is here tonight to represent her father. She speaks of the many families who are in need of yeshuos.

“Farvoos?” she asks. “Why?” She suggests, on behalf of her father, that we women try to strengthen ourselves in the mitzvah of tzinius.

“If everyone will be mekabal a kabbala of tzinius tonight,” she urges us, “it will bring us one step closer to bringing the geulah.”

We hear from Rabbanit Yemima

"They are matanot from Hakadosh Boruch Hu. So we can't complain and we can't ask questions. Ain li she'ailot.

Mamash lo."

los throughout her family’s ordeal.

“Klal Yisroel made the geulah prati happen,” she tells us. “And klal Yisroel can make the geulah klali happen.” She asks us to harness this incredible power of tefillah to daven for the Azan family.

She has seen firsthand how this power works. “We began to see a pattern,” she tells us. “Every time there was an asifa in support of my husband, we would see amazing brachos a few days or weeks later.

All the pieces would come together.

It gave us a deeper understanding of the power of klal Yisroel.”

Her last speaking engagement before her husband’s release was right here in this community. It was a random Wednesday morning at the Bais Sura school. After reciting Tehillim at the school, she left Boro Park. Sure enough, she received the call to come pick up her husband just a few hours later. “The prayers

Mizrachi next, who always manages to offer a sense of direction when we are feeling lost. She explains that she flew in from Yerushalayim for this event “to get yeshuos because I know in a place like this where all am Yisroel is represented these are the conditions of the geulah.”

In her inimitable style, Rebbetzin Yemima speaks about the tragedies that have hit our community hard.

“Azan. Sasson. Azan. Sasson.” Together they spell aish.

“How can a house burn down in three minutes?” she asks. “What can penetrate its thick walls in just three minutes?” A home, a bayit, is considered to be a safe haven. “But not anymore. The home is not secure anymore. Today the yetzer hara is everywhere, even in our homes. We need to daven for a secure home, so that the fire won’t penetrate.” She also urges us to love our children and to help continue to

build Jewish families.

Emotions in this ballroom are running at an all time high, so it’s no surprise that women sob openly when Gayle Sasson comes onstage.

Gayle is the mother of seven children who perished in the Brooklyn fire just two years ago and her presence here tonight is simply overwhelming. Wearing sunglasses and looking frail and yet so strong, she says she is here tonight to thank “everyone who prayed for me and my daughter and my children’s aliyot.”

In the hushed silence, six thousand women are feeling a sense of tremendous awe and respect for this woman who endured unspeakable pain. “Vayechi,” she announces in a quivering voice. “I am alive.”

Today, she says, we pray for the Azan family. And then she admits to this huge gathering that “I was jealous of Mrs. Azan. I envied her.

She didn’t have to bear this pain.”

And yet she continues to say, “How could you not believe in miracles? It should be impossible to jump eighteen feet from a window and not break a bone. But Hashem makes miracles.”

Gayle tells us that she’s generally a private person and only joins us here tonight because “Rabbi Ozeiri asked me to come and speak on behalf of the Azan family. We are here to raise money for them to rebuild their lives as best as they can.”

And then she thanks all of us “for showing support, for your tears, for coming tonight, and for your understanding.”

We make our way home and marvel about what happened here tonight. We just witnessed thousands of Boro Park women, many of them Chassidic, coming together to support a Sephardi family in their pain and to celebrate with a Chabad family in their joy.

An evening of unity indeed.

To contribute to the Azan family Fund, send donations to: Cong.

Yad Yosef/Co Azan Asifa, 1036 Ocean Parkway, Brooklyn, NY 11230. A recording of the event will be available for purchase or can be viewed on TorahAnytime.com.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

TJH

Centerfold Riddle me

You gotta be kidding Moishe and Yentel were listening to the Brooklyn weather report at breakfast. The announcer said, “There will be three to five inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the odd-numbered side of the street.” Moishe got up from the breakfast table and went out to move their car.

Two days later they heard another radio report, “There will be two to four inches of snow today. You must park on the even-numbered side of the street.” Moishe grumbled and went out to move their car.

Three days later the weatherman antwo to twelve inches of snow today

nounced, “There will be and you must park...”

Just then the power went out and they didn’t get the rest of the instructions. “Great,” said Moishe.

“What are we supposed to do now?”

this?

What grows in winter, dies in the summer, and is rooted at the top?

??

?

See answer below

An icicle

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“Aw, Moishe,” Yentel replied, “just leave the car in the garage.”

My New Year’s Resolutions I will finish the book I’ve been trying to get through for the past year, especially since the part about Thing one and Thing two is supposed to be pretty good.

I will not wait until 6 days into 2018 to announce my resolutions.

I will stay focused and not change topics mid—it’s pretty

I will finally stop procrastinating in 2019.

I will be more optimistic. (Yeah, right, like that will ever happen!)

I will exercise 30 minutes. Period. For the year.

When I write things I will make sure it is in a grammatically correct fashion.

cold outside these days.

I will be better at three things: speling and math.

I will finally quit my job as Centerfold Commissioner now that I am starting my second year as president.

I will remove the clothing from my treadmill so I can finally put a recliner on it.

I will work on my Trump Derangement Syndrome even though Trump is not my president!…not my president!… not my president!....not my president!... not my president!...not my president!

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018 The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

Antarctica Trivia 1. Which of the following is true about Antarctica? a. It is a desert b. It is a country c. It is a mountain d. It is the largest continent 2. What is the average winter temperature at the South Pole? a.

-4°C

b. c.

-14°C -24°C d. -49°C

3. In order to work as a doctor in Australia’s Antarctic territory which of the following is one of the requirements that you must do first? a. Get a snowmobile license b. Be a licensed meteorologist c. Have your wisdom teeth and appendix removed

ness of the ice in Antarctica? a. 14 inches b. 4 feet c. 17 feet d. 1.3 miles 5. The lowest temperature ever recorded on Earth was at Russia’s Vostok Station in Antarctica on July 21, 1983.

How cold was it? a. -128.6°F

d. Get certified by the international wildlife commission

b. -147.6°F c. -212.6°F

4. What is the average thick-

d. -397.6°F

 Wisdom Key

 Answers

4-5 correct: You must be from Antarctica. Only one person was ever born in Antarctica, so you’re pretty special.

2-3 correct: You must come from a freezing climate but not exactly Antarctica. Let me take a guess—New York?

0-1 correct: Don’t feel bad, it’s just brain freeze…happens when it gets really cold around here.

3. C- In 1961 a Russian doctor successfully removed 2. D 1. A- Despite its thick ice, Antarctica is classified as a desert because so little moisture falls from the sky.

The inner regions of the continent receive an average of 2 inches of precipitation each year. More rain falls in the Sahara Desert.

his own appendix at Novolazarevskaya station in Antarctica. With no outside help possible, he used local anesthetic and had two expeditioners assist with surgical retractors and a mirror so that he could see what he was doing.

The operation was a success, and the doctor was back on duty within two weeks. It’s not a situation

5.

A

4. D- The maximum known thickness of the ice sheet is 2.9 miles. that Australian Antarctic doctors would like to find themselves in, so they are required to remove their appendixes.

Well Said “May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions!”- Joey Adams

“Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.” -Oscar Wilde

“Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average … which means, you have met your New Year’s resolution.”- Jay Leno

“He who breaks a resolution is a weakling; he who makes one is a fool.” – F.M. Knowles

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Torah Thought

Parshas Shemos

By Rabbi Berel Wein

T

he Torah reading of this week introduces us to the figure and person that will dominate all of Jewish life – and perhaps world civilization as well – for eternity. Though the Torah tells us of Moshe’s birth, salvation from the crocodile-infested Nile River, and his early life as the adopted son of the daughter of the Pharaoh, including the incident of his smiting of the Egyptian taskmaster, which causes him to flee Egypt, it then tells us almost nothing of the ensuing decades of his life.

Where did he flee? How did he occupy himself for over half of his life? How did he arrive at the well in the land of Midyan? Probably the greatest question of all is why the L-rd chose him to be the redeemer of Israel and the greatest lawgiver of all time.

The Torah itself is silent on all of these matters, even though one could think that this knowledge would be vital to understanding the biblical narrative itself. Nevertheless, Mid-

rash attempts to answer some, if not all, of these questions in its holy and many times allegorical methodology.

It makes Moshe a king over tribes in Africa, it grants him years

as to why he was chosen.

The Torah does, however, tell us of an incident where Moshe physically intervenes to protect the daughters of Yitro from the discrimination and

Moshe stands up for the rights of strangers whom he does not know at the time.

of study and holy meditation, and it attempts to give us a picture of the great prophet-in-waiting until the moment of his calling arrives. I have always wondered why the Torah itself makes no mention or description of these crucial years in a lifetime and development of Moshe. It allows him to emerge full-blown as the great prophet and leader of Israel without any preparatory background

persecution of the male shepherds at the well in Midyan. Moshe stands up for the rights of strangers whom he does not know at the time. Moshe, among his all other G-dly characteristics, has an extreme sense of right and wrong, of protecting the downtrodden and reining in the powerful. It is this sense that drove him to smite the Egyptian taskmaster who was unmercifully beating the Jewish

slave.

No matter what happened to Moshe in the intervening years of his life, from that incident to the time that we see him in Midyan, it is obvious that that overpowering sense of justice and rectitude never waned.

This is what will allow him later in his mission to constantly defend the Jewish people even from the L-rd’s judgment. He realizes that the redemption from slavery is a wrenching and difficult experience.

That is the reason why the Torah emphasizes to us that Moshe was a shepherd immediately prior to becoming the leader and savior of Israel. A shepherd by nature must be a compassionate, patient and forgiving person. Otherwise the sheep would never survive his shepherding. The Torah wants to emphasize to us that the true spiritual leader of Israel is humble, self-effacing, patient, and possessed of a burning desire to replace wrong with right and evil with goodness.

Shabbat shalom.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

From the Fire

Parshas Shemos We're Not Going to Take It

By Rav Moshe Weinberger Adapted for publication by Binyomin Wolf

I

would like to speak about security. The Torah teaches us that when Moshe grew up, he felt a burning desire to connect with his brothers and sisters. “He went out to his brothers and he saw their burdens. And he saw an Egyptian man beating an Ivri [a Jewish man] of his brothers. He turned this way and that and he saw that there was no man. He smote the Egyptian and buried him in the sand” (Shmos 2:11-12).

At first glance, Moshe’s response seems completely disproportionate. The pasuk does not say that the Egyptian was beating the Jew to death. While a slave master beating anyone, Jew or non-Jew, would have been horrible and cruel, it was an everyday occurrence for the Jewish people in Egypt. Why did Moshe react this way to what was no doubt part of Jewish life at the time? Don’t the rules of self-defense require one to use the minimum force necessary?

Why did Moshe not kick the Egyptian to stop the beating? Why didn’t

he give him a warning or drop leaflets from an airplane? Why did Moshe react with such ferocity to this everyday event? Also, why does the pasuk identify the victim not only as one of Moshe’s brothers, but also as a Jewish man, an Ivri?

First, Moshe’s reaction was natural. If one sees his brother being attacked violently, it is understandable that one would use violence in coming to his brother’s aid. Halacha even permits one to “take the law into his own hands” in certain circumstances when he will suffer an irrevocable loss if he delays in order to go through the usual legal channels (see Bava Kama 29a; Shulchan Aruch Choshen Mishpat 4).

It is apparent that just before witnessing the beating, a loving feeling toward his people had awakened within Moshe. As the pasuk says, “He went out to his brothers and he saw their burdens.” Moshe’s reaction to his brother’s suffering is therefore somewhat understandable. The hint

that something more may be going on is in the Torah’s emphasis that not only was Moshe rising to the defense of his brother, but also to an oppressed Jewish man, an Ivri. This seems to imply that Moshe not only acted to save the slave from being beaten because of his personal connection to that person, but also because the victim was an Ivri.

Moshe recognized that the beating the Egyptian was inflicting on this one slave was not simply an interaction between two individuals.

It was one “small” manifestation of the struggle between the Egyptian nation and the Jewish nation. Before parshas Shemos, the Torah consists of stories about great individuals and families. The first time the “children of Israel” were called a “nation” is at the beginning of the parsha, when Pharaoh says, “Behold, the nation of the children of Israel are more numerous and is stronger than us” (Shmos 1:9). At that time, we transitioned from merely being a tribe to

becoming a nation.

Moshe went out to connect with his brothers’ suffering not only because they were his relatives, but because of a feeling that they collectively constituted something so much greater than a group of individuals.

They were a nation. And that nation was being abused, beaten, humiliated, tormented, and potentially wiped out by the Egyptians’ hatred and cruelty. Moshe recognized that this Jew’s beating had nothing to do with this particular Jew or that particular Egyptian. Because this Jew was being beaten only because he was the nearest Jew to this Egyptian taskmaster, it was, in effect, an attack on every single Jew – on the entire nation.

Moshe could not abide by this attack on his people. He was struck with the realization that anyone who attacked the essence of the Jewish people had no right to exist. He had to be driven all the way down into the dirt, buried in the sand, without the slightest acknowledgment, military

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

burial, or public mourning. This recognition is the foundation of every Jewish uprising against our oppressors and those who seek to destroy us. Jewish wars were never fought for economic or territorial gain, but were based on a recognition and respect for the dignity and status of the Jewish people’s Gdly purpose.

Unfortunately, during the Egyptian exile, and in subsequent exiles as well, this reality has become obscured. When we become accustomed to oppression and subservience to others, we forget who we are.

We forget that we are a great nation, the children of Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov. We forget that we are worthy of basic dignity and respect.

Even though the Jewish people’s servitude in Egypt caused them to forget that they deserved better than cruelty and slavery, Moshe Rebbeinu did not forget this because he did not grow up as a slave. He was raised in the palace. Because he was free of any form of servitude, he retained

a healthy sense of Jewish national identity. Unlike the rest of our people, he still recognized that it was unthinkable and unacceptable for an Egyptian to lay his hands on a Jew. This realization – that oppres-

knowledgeable in Torah and involved in mitzvos like Dovid, his grandfather, according to the written and oral Torahs, and he causes the entire Jewish people to go according to [the Torah] and rectify the breaches of [its

Because this Jew was being beaten only because he was the nearest Jew to this Egyptian taskmaster, it was, in effect, an attack on every single Jew - on the entire nation.

sion of the Jewish people is outside the pale – is one of the most fundamental qualifications of Moshiach as well. The Rambam explains (Hilchos Melachim 11:4): “And if a king arises from the house of Dovid who is

observance], and he fights the wars of Hashem, this gives him the status that he may be assumed to be Moshiach.”

Spiritual accomplishments are not sufficient to allow us to consider

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someone Moshiach. Even if someone brings the entire Jewish people back to Torah, that is not enough. One must take up the mantle of Moshe Rebbeinu and fight wars for the Jewish people to liberate them from those who denigrate, harm, or oppress us.

We need this quality so much today in our tzaddikim and in our political leaders in Eretz Yisroel. We need people who will zealously pick up the honor of the Jewish nation from the dirt. We need leaders who will awaken the fire of healthy zeal, pride, and self-respect for ourselves.

With Hashem’s help, may we see the day soon when all the enemies of the Jewish people are destroyed and our entire people can return to Eretz Yisroel with the arrival of Moshiach, may he come soon in our days.

Rav Moshe Weinberger, shlita, is the founding Morah d’Asrah of Congregation Aish Kodesh in Woodmere, NY, and has served as Mashpia in Yeshiva University since 2013.

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Between the Lines

What's in a Name?

By Eytan Kobre

The right name is an advertisement in itself.

-Claude C. Hopkins

H

ippie children were no strangers to the unconventional, their parents having made a practice of conferring upon them such outlandish names as Time Warp and Spring Fever and Moonbeam and Precious Promise.

And then there was Fruit Stand.

On the first day of school each year, parents apply nametags to their children, kiss them goodbye, and send them off to school on the bus. Fruit Stand was no different.

His parents pinned a nametag to his shirt and sent him off to school. His teachers thought the boy’s name a bit more “unique” than usual, but nothing so different than what they had become accustomed to.

Would you like to play with the blocks, Fruit Stand? Fruit Stand, how about a snack? Fruit Stand, it’s time for recess. By the end of the first day of school, the boy’s name didn’t seem so out of place.

At dismissal, the teachers led the children out to the buses. “Fruit Stand, do you know which one is your bus?” No answer.

His teachers asked again. “Do you know which is your bus, Fruit Stand?” Again, no answer.

No big deal. The parents had been instructed to write the names of their children’s bus stops on the reverse side of their name tags. So one of his teachers flipped the tag over, only to reveal the neatly printed word, “Anthony.”

Shemos – the sefer and the par-

cance to the names – particularly as a prelude to the exile and the eventual redemption.

Before embarking on the narrative of the Jewish people’s exile in Egypt, the Torah offers a glimpse into a key to Jewish survival – their names (Shemos Rabba 1:5).

We reject Shakespeare’s contention that “a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” Our names

At dismissal, the teachers led the children out to the buses. "Fruit Stand, do you know which one is your bus?"

sha – begins with a recording of the names of the Shevatim who descended to Egypt.

But given the dominant theme of Shemos, the English-Latin name Exodus seems more apt than “Names” (Bereishis Rabba 3:5).

And since we already know the Shevatim’s names from earlier in the Torah, there must be some signifi-

are our essence. They are meant to describe who and what we truly are and aspire to be. When, upon creation, G-d instructed Adam to name the animals, Adam not only named them, he matched each one with its true essence (Radak and Rabbeinu Bachaye, Bereishis 2:19-20; Chullin 27b; Bamidbar Rabba 19:3; Koheles Rabba 7:32; Tanchuma, Chukas 6).

Because that’s what a name ought to do: connect the person or thing being named to its core.

If our names were not intended to carry meaning, we could just distinguish one another as “tall guy,” “smart girl,” “redhead,” and the like.

But those fail to convey the true essence of the person. We are all too familiar with the process by which man, stripped of name and reduced to Jude (or worse, to a number), can be dehumanized.

The custom to recite a verse beginning with the first letter of our name and ending with the last letter of our name – so as not to forget our name on the “Day of Judgment” (Kaf HaChaim 122:11 [Elya Rabba]; see Rashi, Micha 6:9) – recognizes that our name is at the core of our soul and spirit. And when one falls ill, we change their name to avoid the harsh Heavenly decree (Rosh Hashana 16b), not because doing so “fools” G-d (c”v) but because it alters fundamentally that person’s very being.

Since our name is our essence, it is no surprise that the Jewish people were redeemed from Egypt, in part, because they were true to their names (Vayikra Rabba 32:5).

It’s not just that they gave their children Jewish-sounding names; it’s

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

that they remained true to themselves.

There’s an old yarn about a bris at which the officiating rabbi asked the father for the name of the boy.

The father declared proudly, “Let his name be Avraham Yitzchok Yaakov Yosef Moshe Dovid Shlomo.”

“What?!” The rabbi was astounded. “Such a string of names?”

“Rabbi,” replied the father, “I am a poor man, so the child won’t have much in the way of an inheritance.

If he looks like my side of the family, he will not be too handsome. If he resembles my wife’s side of the family, he probably won’t be smart.

So, I decided, let him at least have a good name!”

While the anecdote is intended to be comical, it also plays on the underlying assumption that the names we give and are given can be a portent or harbinger of the future. Names not only tell us about the person (Yoma 83b), they actually have bearing upon the person

(Berachos 7b; Tanchuma, Haazinu 7; see Ohr HaChaim, Shemos 2:10).

“As is his name, so is he” (I Shmuel 25:25); our names affect who we are, who we are to become, our strengths, our weaknesses, our attributes, our vulnerabilities.

But even more important than what we are called is what we call ourselves. For “man is called by three names: one that his father and mother call him, one that other people call him, and one that he acquires for himself. And the best of these is the one he acquires for himself” (Koheles Rabba 7:3; Tanchuma, Vayakhel 1).

Motion picture titan Samuel Goldwyn was born in 1879 as Szmul Gelbfisz. At a young age, he left Poland for England, where he went by the name Samuel Goldfish. In 1899, he immigrated to the United States and became involved in the motion picture industry, ultimately joining forces with Edgar and Archibald Selwyn to form Goldwyn Pictures

Corporation. From then on, he decided, he would go by Samuel Goldwyn.

By 1923, Goldwyn no longer was with Goldwyn Pictures and he wished to form a new company, Samuel Goldwyn Incorporated.

Goldwyn Pictures objected, arguing that the name had been theirs from the days when Samuel had been only a Goldfish or a Gelbfisz. So when Samuel attempted to change his name to Goldwyn, the Selwyns commenced legal action seeking an injunction to restrain him from doing so.

Judge Learned Hand – who previously had changed his own name – denied the injunction and allowed the name change to proceed because “a self-made man may prefer a self-made name.”

That is no less true in the spiritual sense (Koheles 7:1; Nesivos Olam, Shem Tov; Pele Yoetz, Shem Tov). “Every person is destined one day to die… Fortunate is the one

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who grew up with the Torah and whose labor is for the Torah, who brings delight to his Creator, who has grown with a good name and departed this world with a good name” (Berachos 17a; Rus Rabba 2:7). “There are three crowns: the Crown of Torah, the Crown of Priesthood, and the Crown of Monarchy – and the Crown of a Good Name is superior” (Avos 4:13; Koheles Rabba 7:3). The challenge is to bring into focus our names and our actions, such that both bespeak our true essence (Bereishis Rabba 71:4; Bamidbar Rabba 16:10; Tanchuma, Shemos 2).

So, what’s in a name?

Plenty – especially the name we confer upon ourselves through word and deed.

Eytan Kobre is a writer, speaker, and attorney living in Kew Gardens Hills. Questions? Comments? Suggestions? E-mail eakobre@outlook.com.

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

The Observant Jew

Words from the Wise

By Rabbi Jonathan Gewirtz

S

omeday I hope to put together a list of English words and axioms and their Torah-based counterparts. I find them intriguing.

For example, the phrase, “A word to the wise,” meaning “here’s a piece of advice,” is short for, “A word to the wise is sufficient.” In Hebrew, it’s a familiar phrase: “Dai l’chakima b’remiza,” meaning that for the wise person a hint is enough for them to get the message.

Though a wise person may not need as many words to get the point, there’s another aspect in which we need to be wise when it comes to words: how our words will affect other people. As a writer, I can assure you that words are not just a means of communicating information.

Along with that information come emotions, humor, and tone. The variation of these will depend on whether a person will want to read what you wrote or not.

I am personally fond of a specific series of trivia books which share facts, history, and odd occurrences.

It is fun to read, has manageable-size entries (I don’t like novels that take you hours upon hours to read), and I learn interesting things. One day, my wife was at a store and saw a book that looked like the ones I like.

I was very appreciative, but unfortunately the book was dry, boring, and bland. Though it was conveying facts and statistics I didn’t know, the way it was worded made it hard and unpleasant to read.

Speech is similar. I can convey

ideas or concepts in different ways to different effect. Let’s say you come over and tell me a joke. It’s very funny, true, but I also have known it for some time. How I respond will be very telling about what kind of person I am. I’m sure we can all relate.

Setting the stage: You’ve just heard or seen something that you found clever and humorous. You’re excited to share it so you tell it to me.

If I say, “I heard that joke months ago,” all the joy and excitement will drain out of your mood. Even if I say,

Why would I want to do that to someone else?

I’ve had people tell me divrei Torah that I’ve seen but instead of nodding and saying, “Yes, I saw that,” I’ve listened and given them the pleasure of feeling like they’ve taught me something of value, and yes, even that they knew something I didn’t.

The wise person seeks to make others feel smart and good about themselves.

In Mishlei (9:8), it says, “Don’t rebuke a mocker, lest he hate you. Re-

The wise person seeks to make others feel smart and good about themselves.

“Ha ha, yeah, I heard that. It’s a good one,” it’s better than the first way, but still not quite there.

What words would we hear from a wise person? “Ha ha! That’s great.

I’ll have to remember that one,” or something similar. Wisdom understands that there’s more benefit in making someone feel better than letting them know that I’m more informed than they are or think I am.

I personally recall the pain of coming up with a joke and sharing it with someone whose opinion I valued. Instead of appreciating the humor, he gave me a cynical brushoff. It hurt.

buke a wise person and he will love you.” There is a fantastic explanation of this verse. The typical understanding is that you shouldn’t waste your time with someone who won’t listen to rebuke anyway. I heard from R’ Paysach Krohn that the word “letz” is made up of the letters lamed and tzaddik. A letz is someone who thinks he knows it all (lamed = learned) and that he is perfect (tzaddik = righteous/perfect). Such a person won’t listen to rebuke because he doesn’t think he needs it. In that case, don’t waste your breath.

However, the other explanation

says you can give mussar to anyone if you know how to do it. When you want to point out someone’s error, first of all, as R’ Dessler writes, be sure to only criticize the error, not the person who erred; the offense and not the offender. That’s a big mistake people often make.

Then there are the words. If you tell someone, “You’re such a bum!” why on earth would he listen to you?

If anything he’ll hate you and your words will lose all efficacy. That’s criticizing a “letz,” because you’ve painted the recipient as evil.

But when you rebuke a “chachom,” and you tell him, “A smart guy like you shouldn’t X,” or “Doing Y is really beneath someone like you,” he loves you for the compliments you give him and your words will be able to change him.

You see, when it comes down to it, words may be wise by themselves, but they won’t hit their mark unless they are used wisely as well.

Jonathan Gewirtz is an inspirational writer and speaker whose work has appeared in publications around the world.

You can find him at www.facebook.com/ RabbiGewirtz, and follow him on Instagram @RabbiGewirtz or Twitter @ RabbiJGewirtz. He also operates JewishSpeechWriter.com, where you can order a custom-made speech for your next special occasion. Sign up for the Migdal Ohr, his weekly PDF Dvar Torah in English.

E-mail info@JewishSpeechWriter.com and put Subscribe in the subject.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Rabbinical Reflecti ns

SJP

By Rabbi Mordechai Yaffe

I

’m not sure if this is a positive trait or a negative one, but ever since I was young, whenever I heard criticism directed at many people, I always assumed that the speaker was targeting me directly.

Little did I know that many people are the exact opposite; even when it’s clear that they are being addressed they can even nod their heads in agreement while remaining totally obtuse to the reality of the situation.

With that in mind, I want to post a disclaimer that while I am not writing about anyone specifically (so you can relax), I am referring to a significant number of people (so don’t relax).

I fully realize that considering the many profound issues that Klal Yisrael face at this time, the topic I am addressing may appear petty and insignificant but it is my hope to make the argument that this is not the case.

In recent times I have seen a practice creep into both shuls and yeshivas during minyan of bringing in cups of coffee to be sipped throughout davening. When I first saw it, I was struck by the notion of “that can’t be right,” a sort of nondescript malaise about what I was

seeing. It just didn’t seem right but I couldn’t put my finger on it. After all, a person could make a bracha beforehand and it isn’t technically forbidden to eat or drink with tefillin, as long as one isn’t maisiach da’as while doing so. In fact, upon research and speaking with a number of distinguished rabbanim, one would be hardpressed to find a source to definitively say that it is not allowed in Jewish law. So what’s the big deal? Upon much reflection, I came upon the following realization.

While I could not find a definitive basis for condemning the practice, I do know that I have not seen this done in the course of more than forty years that I have been in yeshivas.

One has to wonder, how does such a thing begin? Was there some committee that got together and decided that warm drinks enhance davening in our generation? If that’s the case, then I certainly didn’t get the memo.

I remember seeing the following brilliant ad campaign in the Toronto subway lines many years ago. I’m sure everyone is familiar that Toronto is an exceptionally clean city compared to major American cities (no disrespect intended...just stating the facts). The campaign was

addressing the issue that the subway stations were starting to show the signs of litter being thrown on the ground rather than in the proper receptacles. Stated the ads, “Ever notice that there’s never any litter in a subway station until someone throws down the first piece? Don’t be the first one!” Believe me, this was an actual ad, and if my memory serves me correctly, it was effective.

No one wanted to be the one who created this problem.

So who figured out that he could save time and have his mochaccino during Shacharis? What’s really wrong with it? I don’t think anybody, perhaps except teenagers, would argue that this practice enhances their davening. There are related halachos forbidding people to hold objects in their hand during tefillah because one’s mind will be on the object and not on his davening (Orach Chaim 96:1). Additionally, the Pri Megadim states that in addition to Shemoneh Esrei, this holds true for Krias Shema and Pesukei D’zimra as well. However, one could argue that intermittent sipping is just not the same.

I would like to submit that in addition to being bound by strict

halacha and even minhag, there is another factor to be considered, something that I would like to call Standard Jewish Practice. In fact, since we love to put everything into acronyms (think yeshiva names), I would like to call this SJP. Now, SJP is not as revolutionary as one might think. We used to have another name for it: Normal. There was always a normal way to act, a normal way to speak, a normal way to behave. It’s no coincidence that Chazal state in a number of places that Bnai Yisrael were redeemed from slavery because they did not change their names, their language, or their manner of dress. SJP. The normal way for a Jew to behave. I don’t think our coffee conundrum is comparable to the epidemic of cellphone use during davening. At least with cellphones, there was no precedent for such behavior. We never had an option to maintain our connection with the outside world without interruption.

Although I have this image of it being as though Hashem is politely coughing and saying, “Um, hello?” it’s clear how this practice developed, no matter how reprehensible it is. Of course, I am not condoning it and I had great satisfaction when

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

a talmid recently said to me that he was happy that we don’t permit cellphone use in yeshiva because he now thinks it looks weird to him when he sees it in shuls.

Just because we see certain behaviors occurring does not mean we have to accept it. I am reminded of a story that has been attributed the Rav Chaim Pinchas Scheinberg, zt”l, the legendary Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshivas Torah Ore. Rav Scheinberg was once delivering a shiur on hilchos Pesach and was asked if toothpaste required hashgacha for Pesach. His reply was that toothpaste is not roi l’achilas kelev, not fit for a dog to consume, and as such, is not consider forbidden as chametz.

A talmid raised his hand and said that his family had a dog and that he had personally witnessed the dog eating toothpaste that had fallen on the floor. In his inimitable style, Rav Scheinberg replied, “Freg nisht kashas fun a meshugener hunt,” which means that you can’t ask any ques-

tions from a crazy dog.

It is important to retain our sensitivity to SJP and to recognize that just because some people have begun acting in a way unbefitting to a communion with Hashem, we do not have to accept it – and we certainly

saw a wagon driver, wrapped in his tallis, wearing his tefillin, and davening Shacharis as he was greasing an axel on his wagon. Outraged, the rav exclaimed, “How could he have the nerve to be davening while he is greasing an axel?” to which the

that means we need to incorporate practices that will enhance our davening, not detract from it. We need to remember that halacha requires our davening to be tantamount to the bringing of a korban in the Bais Hamikdash (Orach Chaim, 98:4). I believe that by being sensitive to who we are and who we need to be, we can uphold high standards in our shuls and yeshivos so that no one will think that the “S” of SJP stands for “Superficial.” Let’s leave being meshuga to the dogs.

Was there some committee that got together and decided that warm drinks enhance davening in our generation?

don’t have to follow suit.

Still, we are speaking about people who are there for davening and to change this behavior requires sensitivity and compassion. There is the famous anecdote that one time Rav Levi Yitzchak Berditchever was walking with another rav and they

Rabbi Mordechai Yaffe is the Rosh HaYeshiva of Ateres Yaakov, a local Mesivta (MAY) and Yeshiva Gedolah, with over 220 talmidim, and the rav of Kehillah Ateres Yaakov. Besides his decades as an experienced mechanech, Rabbi Yaffe holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and is licensed to practice in the State of New York. Any topics of interest, questions or comments can be sent to editor@fivetownsjewishhome.com.

Berditchever replied, “Ribbono Shel Olam! Mi k’amcha! Even when they grease axels, they don’t stop davening to You!” Sensitivity? Compassion? Definitely. Acceptance? Absolutely not.

There are so many pressing issues facing Klal Yisrael, but maybe

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Israel Today

The Columbia Connection

By Rafi Sackville

T

welve of the thirteen years our family lived in Cedarhurst were spent as members of Tiferet Zvi, the small shul on Columbia

Avenue, just off Central Avenue. It was not only a place of davening and learning, but a welcome refuge from the grind of life. We made our way

there through rain, snow, sleet, and, in the case of Sandy, fallen trees and powerlines.

When the time came for us to return to Israel, the leave-taking from the shul was difficult. Our personal relationship with Rabbi Chatzinoff and with many of the congregants was, and continues to be, close.

Tiferet Tzvi seems like such a quaint anomaly among the sea of large shuls in surrounding Cedarhurst and Lawrence. Flanked by Beth Shalom to the south and Young Israel of Cedarhurst to the north, Tiferet Tzvi looks anything but a shul; its facade of gray slatted siding, a sharply angled rooftop, green hedges and suburban lawn that fronts the street are more suited to a nuclear family than the spiritual home to a few dozen families.

Both aforementioned shuls house large congregations in which I have had the privilege to daven. The people there are warm and caring, but they can’t offer the intimacy of a small congregation.

In Tiferet Tzvi there is no talking during davening, shiurim take place seven days a week, and the congregants share a bond that goes beyond the guy sitting next to you during Mussaf or with whom you eat herring once it’s over.

The kiddushim are small affairs.

Our sons used to enjoy working in the tiny kitchen preparing the

kugels, cholents, cakes and herring.

The Tiferet Tzvi kiddushim paled in comparison to the large affairs of some of the shuls I’ve been to; carving and sushi stations and roving waiters was never a Shabbat experience I much cared for.

Prior to our leaving for Israel Rabbi Chatzinoff pointed out that, despite returning to live in the land of kedusha, we would still be in galut.

As he states so succinctly in his book Imrei Fi, “Through the harmony of unity, the wisdom of limits, and the repulsion of foreign influences, we build a true protective shelter for the sanctity of our lives.” It’s akin to someone saying “b’ezrat Hashem” and hoping for a miracle without applying any personal input. Living in Israel alone does not guarantee one’s spiritual development. It was the rabbi’s way of telling us that we are all works in progress regardless of where we live.

Israeli society is, in many respects, more challenging than in the diaspora. The divisions in the religious community, for example, cross the spectrum of social class, geography and politics, as well as many of the other complex issues that divide our small sliver of a country.

More than once the rabbi told me that changes in life are inevitable.

One can’t stay moored in one place just because of familiarity. I have

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oftentimes observed how potential Aliyah candidates are hampered by a fear of the unknown: where will they live; what will they do with their children; will their dreams meet reality after they’ve stepped onto the tarmac at Ben Gurion Airport? The questions are all relevant. What they all have in common is fear of change.

They will continue to fear until they either take whatever plunge is stifling them or they will settle into the familiarity they know but are unable to challenge.

It’s seems like a lifetime since we left New York. After almost five years we have settled down to a wonderful and fulfilling life in Israel. We look back with gratitude to all that we experienced under the rabbi’s guidance. We have changed, as expected, living lives far removed from the Five Towns.

Recently, the shul made a fleeting appearance in Jerusalem-as it were when Ora Talya, one of the Chatzinoff

children, was married.

It was on a cold, November night that my family met at Binyan Clal, opposite the entrance to Machane Yehuda, to attend the wedding. It was

The Chatzinoff family aside, almost a minyan of congregants had made the journey. Some had arrived that morning and were due to fly out that same evening. Also in attendance

The congregants share a bond that goes beyond the guy sitting next to you during Mussaf or with whom you eat herring once it's over.

cold and blustery. The conditions gave one a hope that winter had finally arrived, bringing ample rainfall with it. Our three sons, who live in Kiryat Tivon, at the end of Road 6, made their way to the city by bus, where they met our daughter, Batya, who spent the day with them.

were our friends, the Ghermans from Ramat Beit Shemesh, who had, like us, been members of the shul and had made Aliyah.

The Woodwards, that remarkable couple from Texas, who were neighbors to the rabbi’s son, Yoni, in Dallas, and whose story was told a few

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months ago in these pages, had, like us, driven down from the Western Galil.

I fell into conversation with a young man I hadn’t met before who today sits in the seat I occupied for so many years.

Reuniting with all of these wonderful friends gave us a feeling of gratitude for the direction, the love, and the care we were grateful to experience while living in New York.

As the rabbi so aptly puts it: “If we can only remind ourselves, at least twice a day, perhaps through acts of chessed, of the priority of unity and the joint destiny that all Jews share, then we will build a basis for cultivating within ourselves a perpetual feeling of unity.”

The wedding itself reflected the shul: no frills, a beautifully small wedding, full of warmth.

Rafi Sackville, formerly of Cedarhurst, teaches in Ort Maalot in Western Galil.

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Hope

Portrait of

By Tammy Mark “Whoever saves a life, it is considered as if he saved an entire world” -Talmud (Sanhedrin 37a)

J

ennie and Gary Landsman are desperately trying to save the lives of their two little boys. At the very same time they are hoping to save others through their plight.

This past summer, the Landsmans received the devastating news that both their one-year-old son Benny and their newborn baby Josh were afflicted with a genetic mutation and diagnosed with Canavan disease. Informed that it was an incurable, degenerative and fatal condition, Jennie and Gary went home to figure out how to make the most of their precious time before the disease overwhelmed their precious babies.

Canavan disease is a rare genetic disease that affects the ability of the brain to send and receive messages.

Children with Canavan disease are unable to sit, stand, walk or talk. As degeneration progresses, many children will lose the ability to swallow,

develop seizures, and become blind.

After arranging all possible therapies and available medications in their best attempts to slow down the disease, the Landsmans discovered one more thing they could do. There was a possibility of gene therapy – a treatment full of promise for a cure that was still stuck in the lab. The miracle they were praying for was actually out there, but it was $1.2 million away. Desperate to try her very best for her children, Jennie set up a GoFundMe campaign and posted it on Facebook. A little over a month later, through tremendous community effort, the Landsmans are coming closer to their goal and to their miracle each day. Their plight is a bit more than personal; the Landsmans also have messages of awareness and of hope that they are intent on spreading through their campaign.

The Landsmans’ goal is threefold.

Of course, there is the immediate and overwhelming desire to save the lives of their children. They also know that securing the successful treatment for Canavan disease will lead to advance-

ments in some of the more complex and elusive degenerative diseases, and they want to offer hope for those struggling and waiting for their own cures.

Lastly, Jennie and Gary want to spread the word about the importance of genetic screening for all future parents.

“We really want to spread awareness so it doesn’t happen to other people,” Jennie explains.

J

ennie and Gary Landsman were married in March 2015 in a small ceremony at the home of a childhood friend. A second marriage for both, the two were eager to move forward and start their new lives together. Jennie had a young son, Michael, from her previous marriage, and both Jennie and Gary knew they wanted to have a big family. Jennie’s first pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage, but she got pregnant again soon after. A yoga instructor and martial arts teacher, Jennie was fit and active and had a perfectly normal pregnancy.

Benny came into the world on June 27, 2016 with a bit of excitement – born

on the way to the hospital in Hatzalah – but was otherwise perfectly typical and healthy. His parents gleefully brought him home from the hospital the next day. Though Benny was very colicky at first, Jennie knew it was quite common and saw no reason to be concerned, especially once that phase had passed. At 2 ½ months Benny turned into a happy and cheerful baby.

“One of those easy babies,” says Jennie. “He turned into this chilled, yummy, delicious kid – and he still is.”

It wasn’t until Chanukah of 2016 that Jennie and Gary thought of anything different. They were getting ready for a Chanukah party at home and Jennie’s sister was lending a hand and helping with baby Benny. “At some point she said to me, ‘Does he always need this much support?’” Jennie recalls, “It hadn’t even occurred to me. He was just turning 6 months, he was still little, and you don’t expect much at that age. She was noticing he needed more head support than she thought made sense.”

Over the next week Jennie started

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to watch little Benny. She spoke to a friend, an occupational therapist who works with infants, who suggested Jennie get Benny evaluated. Benny was approved for both occupational and physical therapy. Although he couldn’t sit up on his own, his doctor wasn’t nervous; Benny had been meeting all of his milestones up until that point and was still in the range of normal. Jennie was told there wasn’t anything to worry about. Soon after that, however, Benny plateaued – he went from meeting all of his milestones to not sitting up and not rolling over, save for a few times by accident.

Any parent intent on watching a child hit expected milestones can identify with the concern of a delay at any stage of development. “With every single day that passed I started to get more and more nervous because my instincts kind of kicked in that something’s not OK. But you also don’t want to believe that things aren’t OK…so you’re not sure,” she says.

When Jennie took Benny to the first neurologist, he suggested they wait and see how Benny would do with the physical therapy and to check back in a month. One month later she went to another more knowledgeable neurologist who basically said the same, and that every child develops at their own pace. Benny was making eye contact and was responsive and charming, and exhibited no indication of cognitive delays at that point. The Landsmans followed up repeatedly with the doctors. As the months passed, different issues began to appear. Jennie took him to an ophthalmologist to address what seemed like muscular issues with his eyes. Since his vision was still fine at the time, it was simply

explained as an immaturity.

It was at that point that the Landsmans went to another neurologist, the head of pediatric neurology at a major hospital, who finally sent them for a complete battery of tests. “The bloodwork was hard,” recalls Jennie. “We had to go back a few times because it was too much blood to take from the baby at once.” Jennie was now pregnant with Josh, but anxiously and dutifully completed Benny’s testing over several visits. The results eventually came back in a urine test; children

scary.” When the doctor called back he explained that results had been trickling in and that they found something.

He said, “I can’t see you today but I made you an appointment with a geneticist – can you go today?”

Jennie and Gary went in to see the geneticist that same day with Benny and their newborn Josh in tow.

“She gave us so much time, was so so sweet,” says Jennie. “I didn’t even comprehend why she was giving us so much time, preparing us in a way…”

“She just came in with a sad face,”

"I would pick up my baby and I would just fall apart - how many more times can I pick him up and hug him? How many more times am I going to nurse him? How many times am I going to rock him in this chair?"

with Canavan disease do not break down everything properly in the body which results in an excess of something called NAA in the urine.

The phone call from the doctor came on the morning of July 31. “We got some of the test results in – give me a call…” was the message on the answering machine at 7:30 AM. The Landsmans promptly called the office to find out that the doctor that called them was on vacation. “That was when my heart sank,” recalls Jennie.

“He’s calling me from vacation – that’s

adds Gary.

That was when they first heard of the disease. “She told us that she thinks it’s Canavan disease. We both sat there like, ‘OK, what does that mean?’ We’d never heard of it,” says Jennie. “She goes on to tell us that it’s when the child is missing an enzyme and the brain can’t function normally.”

Jennie asked if it was possible to give Benny the missing enzyme, figuring it was a simple resolution, until the doctor explained that it was unfortunately not simple at all.

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It was at this moment that Jennie and Gary were told the words that no parent should ever hear. The doctor told them that there’s no treatment, no cure – there’s nothing they could do.

The disease is fatal and children with the illness don’t live past the age of ten.

“I can’t even describe the state of being that we were in – we were just completely shocked. It was so shocking because you have this seemingly healthy baby who was delicious and bubbly and yummy and doing everything OK – and then suddenly he’s not OK.” The geneticist then proceeded to tell them that they wanted to do a genetic test to confirm the gene mutation and that they needed to test twoweek-old Josh because there is a 1 in 4 chance of Josh having the disease.

“Of course, you know, you just want to disappear when you hear things like that…I was hysterically crying at this point. So was my husband,” shares Jenny.

“Then we went home to wait for the results. It was a very painful two weeks.” On August 14, on Gary’s birthday, they received the results that both of their baby boys tested positive for Canavan disease. “You don’t want to go on – your whole world goes dark.”

Jennie describes feeling like she was in a hole for a few days. “You wish you weren’t here anymore.”

Jennie also had a hard time bonding with Josh. “You’re scared – you’re like I’m supposed to sit here and fall in love with this little person to say goodbye? It didn’t make sense; such an unnatural place to be in. Normally you’re bonding with your baby and here I was being terrified of being heartbroken.

I was already heartbroken, but even

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Benny and Josh

more so – it was becoming more and more painful as I got to know him.”

Those days following the diagnosis were painful and difficult for Jennie.

“I would pick up my baby and I would just fall apart – how many more times can I pick him up and hug him? How many more times am I going to nurse him? How many times am I going to rock him in this chair?” until one day she realized, “I’m going to look back down the line and have good memories from one year with Benny and no good memories of Josh.” She decided she had to make a change. “OK I’m not thinking about tomorrow – I’m going to think about the next hour – I’m just thinking about right now and I’m just going to enjoy this minute right now.

And that’s what I did.”

It was a constant exercise in gratitude. “Anytime my mind would start to wander, what’s my life going to look like in three years from now? I would push myself back. I would sit there and try to just think about what I have and what I appreciate – it was like a really big test.”

“Benny is still a joy,” gushes Jennie.

“Benny presents like a five-month-old, but cognitively he’s a little bit further than that. He knows everybody, knows how to play peekaboo, he laughs at things – he’s like this happy guy who just wants to play and have fun. We enjoy them – even if it’s just hanging out with them and playing a game or bath time, you just enjoy the every day. “

J

ennie and Gary made the very conscious decision to fight hard against the prognosis; they

Michael, Benny and Josh

know that early intervention is critical.

Benny has 4-5 therapists per day coming to help keep him where he is, with a daily schedule that includes physical, occupational, feeding and developmental therapies. The medications that the boys are currently on will help slow down the degeneration. They saw a difference pretty quickly with Benny, with improved gross motor functions right away and other very small changes – and every little thing makes a difference. Five-month-old Josh started therapy as well to get him to do as much as possible before the degeneration starts to kick in, and thank G-d he’s much further along than average.

“They’re really pushing him to do more and move further faster. We’re hoping that he’ll retain those skills as he gets older.”

Most remarkably, the Landsmans also found the well-respected researchers who developed the gene therapy customized to treat Canavan disease and they are desperate to fasttrack funding to bring this gene therapy out of the lab and into the hands of patients. The family now has reason to be both joyous and hopeful; the gene therapy they are hoping for is a real solution and becoming more of a reality with each dollar.

Gene therapy works by introducing genetic material into cells to compensate for abnormal genes. If a mutated gene causes a necessary protein to be faulty or missing, gene therapy may be able to introduce a normal copy of the gene to restore the function of the protein. A gene that is inserted directly into a cell usually does not function,

so a carrier is genetically engineered to deliver the gene instead. Viruses are often used as carriers because they can deliver the new gene by infecting the cell, and scientists have found viruses that do not have a function and cause no harm. Since the gene that makes a certain enzyme is mutated and non-functioning in Canavan patients, they can insert the missing gene into this virus. The virus will go and “attack” the body, photocopying itself in the body so that the body can then produce the enzyme.

“G-d created everything for a reason – so what’s the point of a virus that doesn’t do anything? Well, scientists can modify it; put the gene in that they’re missing. The virus attacks the body and photocopies the gene into each cell,” marvels Jennie.

Gene therapy has proven successful in treating other diseases with missing enzymes. Scientists have cured genetic blindness. This past year they cured two children with another brain disease called ALD, where children are missing a different enzyme.

These cures take time and money to develop, and rarer diseases simply do not get as much attention or funding as others.

“It’s been done and it’s very doable.

They’ve created this gene therapy, this virus, and they’ve tested it – they just need to make it. They have it for Canavan. It’s sitting there – they need to produce it and make it available for humans. It’s been figured out in the animal models and it’s been incredible,” Jennie says.

Jennie is very hopeful. “There is

actually some recent funding that went into Canavan and they’re slowly doling it out; it’s not being fast-tracked. What we’re doing is we are raising the money to fast-track directly to bring the treatment to patient use and out of the lab. If we do that, our kids will be able to have the medicine – which is crazy.”

“The biggest hope is that it will cure them,” she says. “In past trials, 13 years ago, they stopped the disease from progressing. With the newer ones on the animals, the body was able to repair itself from the damage – so we don’t know. Potentially they can actually be cured and live normal lives.

If it doesn’t go to our most hopeful scenario and it just stops the disease, then that’s huge! It will save their lives.

They may still be disabled, but it won’t make them worse every year and every day.” Jennie explains, “Because it’s degenerative, every single day there’s more damage to the brain – so every day makes a difference.”

W

hen Jennie posted the GoFundMe information on her Facebook page on Thanksgiving morning, she didn’t do anything further. Close friends and family shared and forwarded the link through social media, email and WhatsApp. Benny and Josh’s cause touched so many people and the response has been overwhelming and very uplifting to the Landsmans.

People have reached out from all over – one company making a custom play table for Benny with supports.

Their local Trader Joe’s in Brooklyn ordered a special needs shopping cart

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specifically for her and Benny, which Jennie is insisting should be shared with others who need it. Fundraisers have sprouted big and little – from a neighborhood girl baking cookies to sell door to door, to shul and school tzedakah projects, to the Pa-Kua Martial Arts studio running “Benny and Josh” classes internationally. Acts of kindness, such as families sending meals and local girls doing chessed hours at night to help with bedtime and the boys, help Jennie and Gary tremendously and they appreciate it all.

“People are really incredible and beautiful. People that don’t know me hear and they want to help however they can,” Jennie says.

The collected funds are going through Rechav Lev, a local charity in their community of Marine Park which officially declared that they are raising money for the cure for Canavan. As of January 2, the campaign has raised $725,595 of the $1.2 million goal – and the funds are already being disbursed to the labs, researchers and doctors. Though not able to have an exact timeline, the Landsmans expect that the cure for Benny and Josh could happen within a year. The treatment is already in the process of production but they must keep it going in order for the miracle to fully come to fruition.

Jennie and Gary are very excited to see a cure for their boys, but also for the larger picture of hope for others.

Though Canavan affects approximately 1,500 children currently, successful gene therapy will help Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s and ALS patients come closer to cures. By studying a disease with a single gene, scientists can apply findings to more complex diseases and have used Canavan research to help apply gene therapy to more complex diseases. Since they affect the brain in a similar way, the hope is they’ll be able to use similar treatments, modified for those diseases.

The Landsmans passionately want to promote an even wider awareness for genetic testing. The fact that some illnesses can be predicted and possibly avoided through comprehensive genetic testing is a message that the Landsmans are hoping to impress upon the community. Being a carrier of a genetic disease means that even though one may not show any symp-

toms, it is still possible to pass that disease on to one’s child, r”l. Genetic disease only occurs when both parents are carriers for the same disease, with

your options and what more you can get tested for – just to make those choices. You can choose not to, but you should know what you’re saying yes or

"It was so shocking because you have this seemingly healthy baby who was delicious and bubbly and yummy and doing everything OK - and then suddenly he's not OK."

a 25% chance of having a child affected by the disease.

Jennie had been tested before she got pregnant with Michael and thought she was tested for everything relevant – Canavan was on the Ashkenazi panel at that time. She had it done through her doctor’s office. Due to a clerical mistake, a full panel was not ordered.

Her results came back negative for all – that Jennie was not a carrier for any of the diseases – but everything wasn’t tested for. Jennie thought she was fine and never thought about it again. Gary never got tested since Jennie was told she wasn’t a carrier.

“I was very young and uninformed.

There is a short panel with 40 diseases that they test for and the long with 200. You should really know what you’re getting tested for and know

no to,” Jennie says. “When I got my results, I wish I was informed. You just trust the doctor and don’t think twice about it.”

There are organizations that focus on genetic testing especially for Jewish families. Dor Yeshorim works on an anonymous basis and tests potential couples for genetic compatibility.

Participants do not know their results or what diseases they may be carriers for, as the goal is to prevent any stigma on the individual. Individuals are given numbers to use to call in when asking about compatibility with a potential spouse. Jscreen is a broader testing service that provides results to each individual and is done through a simple saliva sample. Jscreen tests for approximately 200 diseases. Some doctors will even suggest getting test-

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ed before every pregnancy. As genetics is an ever-growing field with much advancement, testing has become more and more accurate over the years.

“Maybe something else can be prevented – why risk it If you can be informed? Go to a genetic counselor – go to someone who’s really an expert in the field – that would be my message from my experience,” advises Jennie. “Obviously, this is very rare, but it is so devastating and I would never ever, ever want to see anybody go through that – not the family and not the children.”

She hopes that all parents could connect to that feeling of wanting to do anything they can for their kid or their family. “I want people to feel connected to Benny and Josh – they’re both these delicious babies and nobody deserves what they have. It’s a very devastating and scary disease; it’s a downward spiral that these normal kids who are enjoying life will have taken away from them.”

As for older brother, Michael, now 7, Jennie says it can be very difficult for him, with sadder days and happy days where he’s just not thinking about it, because he’s a kid. For her and Gary, it’s a roller coaster ride. They are both living day by day and minute by minute, trying to focus on the now and spending time with the boys. “We’re going through it together.”

Benny and Josh’s story has touched hearts of family, friends and the extended community, but also reached a broader audience with a recent segment on “Good Morning America.”

Though the Landsmans have gotten so far, they worry about the campaign slowing down just as it’s getting closer to the cure.

“It’s amazing what the community has done but now we need others to help and keep it going. That’s what’s going to get us to literally save their lives. It’s not like some magic hopefulness, it is really already figured out. It’s there and it’s so close… we just need to get it to them.”

To donate to unlock the cure for Benny and Josh, go to https://www. gofundme.com/savebennyandjosh.

For more information about genetic testing visit https://jscreen.org/ or http://doryeshorim.org/.

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Dating Dialogue

What Would You Do If… Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters

Dear Navidaters,

My problem with women is that I feel like I always like them more than they like me. I’m a very romantic, devoted kind of guy.

Once I meet someone that I like I think about them constantly and feel the need to be in touch daily and get together often. I would think that women would feel flattered to know that someone is thinking about them constantly and thinks so much of them but I find that it has the opposite effect and ultimately I get the feeling that they need to run from me.

I know I’m not great alone and prefer doing things with another person, rather than just by myself. I do work full-time and have a pretty good job, though not a very exciting one. So when I’m not working, I need to fill my time with someone special. I’m 24 already and have gone out with quite a few women, but somehow have never made it past a third or fourth date. And honestly, I’m usually not the one to end it.

I’ve been told that I have to play “hard to get” a little. But it’s not who I am. I wear my heart on my sleeve. Do you think there are women out there who can appreciate a devoted person like myself or is my only hope to become someone that I’m not? And if that’s the case, how do I become someone else?

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions.

Our intention is not to offer any definitive

conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

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The Panel The Rebbetzin

The Mother

Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S. here is no need for you to transform yourself and be something that you are not. There is an honesty about you that has appeal and probably comes through. Sincerity and desire for companionship are legitimate. But you do need to ask yourself a few questions.

Why am I lonely?

Am I a well-rounded person? Do I have other interests beyond work and dating? Am I contributing to the welfare of other people or am I just focused on my own needs? Do I give other people space and listen to them in conversation? Am I communicating mostly things about myself or do I focus on the other person?

You may be lacking other relationships in your life. Get involved in the community and with some kids who may need mentoring.

Relationships will grow if you do chessed and volunteer.

There are other matters to explore on your own and possibly with some help from mentors and professionals. If you are as honest with yourself as you are in this question, you may be able to focus on them.

Ask yourself some questions such as: Am I needy? Is my family history a factor in my neediness? Have I had trouble developing relationships during my school years? Am I perhaps lacking some social skills that are hindering my dating success?

I suspect you may have a problem with social skills. Fear not.

Good professional help will help you deal with this short-term problem.

Do take the time to explore the other areas mentioned before. It will help you achieve clarity and develop the pathway to greater success with relationships.

Sarah Schwartz Schreiber, P.A. orty something years ago, I was set up with a nice guy who, during the course of our conversation, lamented how he’s dated so many nice girls who wouldn’t give him a second chance. He looked me squarely in the eye and pleaded, “Tell me something, am I so bad? What’s wrong with you girls?” Talk about awkward; I felt sorry for him but not enough to give him a second date.

Young man, your problem is not that you like women more than they like you or that you are a hopeless romantic. Simply put, you come across as lonely and needy; both in your letter and, most probably, on a date.

Sorry to inform you, no woman of interest will marry you out of pity.

Social intelligence (aka emotional intelligence or street smarts): most guys have developed it by the time they are ready to date; some men just miss the mark. It’s the intuition that tells people what to say and when to say it; when to be vulnerable and wear your heart on your sleeve and when to hold back and play hard to get. A guy who is emotionally savvy is able to read verbal and non-verbal cues so he can pursue a courtship in a natural, non-threatening manner.

It you are serious about developing your emotional IQ, I urge you to seek the assistance of a competent therapist who will help you deal with your neediness so that you can project a more poised and confident persona.

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F

The Shadchan Michelle Mond here are definitely women out there who can appreciate a devoted, loving guy, over time. You mention in your letter that you act

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in a romantic and devoted manner yet you also state that you haven’t gotten past a third or fourth date.

You should not be acting romantic or obsessive after a third or fourth date, and even more so on a first or second date.

I am inclined to believe that the women you are dating are sensing a boundary issue. You can channel your romantic nature towards planning thoughtful and fun dates, but you must give her space in between these dates and make sure to keep the verbal compliments inside until the relationship progresses.

Feeling interested in speaking with your date to see how she is dong is a positive thing. However, to act on it and feel the urge to call daily and text constantly after you’ve only met once or twice can seem overbearing and obsessive,

In reality, it's necessary that we are complete before we meet our bashert. pushing her away I would also be interested to know what you are saying on the date themselves that might make a woman feel uncomfortable. Realize that she just met you, and to her it seems strange that a guy would be pouring his heart out to her after such a short time. This will then

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lead to her ending the relationship by saying, “He’s a really nice, sweet guy, but not for me.”

It is very important that you make sure you are setting proper boundaries and adhering to appropriate social norms. I have seen many shidduchim break up due to one side over-texting once numbers are exchanged. It makes the other person feel stifled and uncomfortable. It is very nice that you wear your heart on your sleeve and are genuine, but you must also acknowledge that most people need space.

There is room for both in the relationship once you learn what is appropriate and what is not, especially early on, before she really even knows you. A dating coach can help you with specifics of what is, and what is not, appropriate and help guide you towards suc-

cessful dating in the future.

The Single Tova Wein

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here is a romantic notion that once a person meets their bashert that other person will complete them. In reality, it’s necessary that we are complete before we meet our bashert and the addition of our bashert into our lives expands our lives in wonderful ways, but we can’t expect another person to fill up the missing gaps in our life.

I get the impression that your life in not complete – like there is an emptiness that you haven’t ful-

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

ly filled with a more fulfilling job, interesting friends, wonderful hobbies, volunteer work – all of the things that gives a person a sense of fulfillment...and you are therefore hoping that you’ll meet a woman who can take the place of all of the missing pieces. That is just too much pressure for anyone to manage.

Besides the unfairness of one person being “everything” to the other person, when a person comes across as desperate, it’s usually a turn off. It’s not an attractive quality. People are attracted to confident individuals who feel good about themselves and know that they have much to offer the other person. So if you meet someone and immediately start hyper-texting, repeatedly calling, expecting to see her constantly from the get-go, you are giving off all the wrong signals.

My advice to you

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People are attracted to confident individuals who feel good about themselves. is that you need to figure out how to make your life more interesting and fulfilling. What can you add to your present lifestyle that will give you a sense of purpose and satisfaction? Once you get your act together and no longer feel desperate when it comes to being alone and doing things alone, you will give off a very different aura and not feel the need to chase your dates. I believe that is your ticket toward being your best dating self and being appreciated by the women you go out with.

Pulling It All Together The Navidaters Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists

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ha nk you for writing in. I think your letter may speak to a lot of people who, like you, wear their hearts on their sleeve. Lots of people prefer not to beat around the bush or play games. And lots of people appreciate candor, honesty and vulnerability.

These are all beautiful qualities that make someone very appealing to the right person.

If I understand you correctly, you are in a tight spot. It feels as though you see yourself as having two choices: I can either be very forthcoming and show my vulnerability or change my personality into someone I am not. That is a pretty big choice you have here, and I’m sure it doesn’t feel too good. After a bunch of rejections, I can understand why you feel these are your only choices. I’d like you to think about slowing down for a moment and exploring what brought you to this point.

Most women want to feel desired and to know they are thought of. But truthfully, it seems as though you may be coming on too strong and too fast. I would imagine that women may be thinking, He doesn’t even know me.

We went out once or twice. He can’t possibly be crazy about me yet. He doesn’t even know me as a person yet. He must be very eager to be in any relationship.

Women want to feel special and unique. If you are expressing your strong feelings for them right off the bat, the woman may feel as though it’s not necessarily her that you are crazy about but it is being in any relationship that you are crazy about.

And so, this may be why women break up with you after a few dates.

I think you may benefit from some soul searching, whether on your own

or in therapy, to discover and then process the way you so deeply attach to and then need to be in constant contact with someone after a first date.

Of course, we all want love and security and connection.

But the early stages of dating, whether in Orthodox or secular circles, is really about getting to know someone. At the beginning of dating we have to give people space. And all throughout your relationship, you will need to give her space. G-d willing, when you are married, your wife will need her space to be with family and friends and will not and should not always be available to you. And you are going to have to be OK with that. If you are not OK with that, I think it may be worthwhile to enter therapy to explore why that is and help you learn to enjoy being in your own skin without someone else.

There is nothing like a loving relationship.

Studies show that through loving, healthy intimate relationships individuals gain self-esteem. Healthy relationships even have health benefits! However, in

order to enter that kind of healthy relationship, we must first have a healthy relationship with ourselves.

My advice to you is to take a break from dating and do this work. I am hopeful that with the proper work, you will re-enter the dating world with a newfound love for yourself that will be very attractive to the right woman. That confidence and appreciation for yourself, along with your “heart on your sleeve” romantic inclination, will be very attractive to lots of women. You can do this!

Sincerely, Jennifer Esther Mann, LCSW and Jennifer Mann, LCSW are licensed psychotherapists and dating and relationship coaches working with individuals, couples and families in private practice in Hewlett, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 516.224.7779. Press 1 for Esther, 2 for Jennifer. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email thenavidaters@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.

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Dr. Deb

How to Have a Conversation

By Deb Hirschhorn, Ph.D.

I

know. You looked at the title of this article and said to yourself that you certainly know how to have a conversation and don’t need to read on. But give me a chance here. There’s a reason why I wrote this.

Listen, just pretend I was explaining something you really didn’t know, like how to eat gracefully with chopsticks, and then keep reading.

You see, I’m discovering that so many people are used to arguing that they actually don’t know how to have a conversation. What’s more, they don’t know why they would want to have one. So that’s a good starting place.

WHAT ARE CONVERSATIONS FOR ANYWAY? Fun. Really.

Okay, I get it. You are so used to arguing that they most certainly are not fun. Far from it. I get that.

You’re trying to make your point; your spouse is trying to make the other point; neither one of you is listening to the other.

That last point is a good stopping place, a place to raise one eyebrow.

Like, wait a minute! If you’re both so intent on making a point and you know you’re not listening to each other, what is the point?

Right?

Yet, people do this for years. De-

cades. And no one’s been listening all that time. Wow. Think about the waste. Of energy. Of emotion – all that disappointment; all that anger; all that frustration; all that feeling of being so alone.

Ah! Now, we’re getting back to the point of real conversations. Not the phony ones where you want to call it a “conversation” for lack of a better term, but it isn’t. Real conversations enhance a feeling of be-

ourselves through this other person. We get annoyed with the differences and want that person to be us.

Arthur Aron, Ph.D., formerly of Stony Brook University and now out at the other coast, spent an academic lifetime studying love. And he discovered that that idea of self-expansion is a very powerful reason why couples are attracted to one another. But – understand – this necessitates that we are each different

Real conversations enhance a feeling of being enriched by the presence in your life of someone who is decidedly different from you - and that's okay.

ing enriched by the presence in your life of someone who is decidedly different from you – and that’s okay.

Enriched – quite the opposite of being alone.

It’s more than okay. It’s wonderful. I mean, consider how boring it would be to be married to a clone of yourself. No, we are very specifically attracted to someone who offers something that we don’t have. This completes us – if we can learn from this Other. That’s a big “if.” Generally, shortly after the marriage, we forgot that we wanted to expand

from our partner.

So if we begin with the premise that the differences are good, then we can assume that we will, basically, hardly ever agree on things.

With that detail out of the way, we then realize that there never was a point to arguing. Instead, what we should be doing is discovering one another.

Right? We’re different and we were attracted to one another specifically because of that. So, let’s make use of that reality! We should be enjoying the 50 or so years we’re

going to spend together like archeologists enjoying their dig. It’s fun, it’s enriching, it’s interesting, and it’s definitely not boring.

Now, you may disagree, and I certainly don’t want to be glib here.

When you are dating, you should be sure that you and your potential partner have some very basic things in common: hashkafa, for example.

(We can get into a longer list of the in-common things in another article.)

So let’s take an example that you could perhaps disagree with me on.

Let’s say your spouse installs heating and cooling systems. On the face of it, you might think that is terribly boring. I would respond that you only think so because you do not know how to have a real conversation, a real mission of discovery.

You see, if the point of a real conversation is learning about one another, then you’re asking the wrong question. It’s not about the heating and cooling systems themselves at all. It’s about your spouse’s interest in them that’s on the table. And you discover that by asking the right questions. That’s the first rule of how to have a real conversation.

HOW TO HAVE A REAL CONVERSATION • You have to ask good questions My father, a”h, was an engineer.

Now, as it happens, math was not my strong point and it was his love.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

I used to listen to him explain how he came to become an engineer. He told me he always loved it, since he was five-years-old. Although I had no interest of my own in it, I was intrigued with how a small child could know what he wanted to do for the rest of his life.

So imagine having a similar conversation with a spouse who is in the heating and cooling business.

When did he first get interested in it? What about it drew him? Perhaps he found he was talented working with his hands. When did he discover that?

I remember following my father, a”h, around the house as he fixed the wires behind the outlets and other such things. Perhaps your mate did the same thing. Perhaps it was a way to be closer to his dad.

Perhaps it was something he excelled at when others didn’t get it so he could shine. Perhaps he made a whole business out of it. Maybe he likes the freedom of running his own business or the lack of a ceiling when doing so. These are all questions you can ask.

• You have to ask your questions in the right tone of voice There is a world of difference between a question and something that almost sounds like a question except it really is one person totally dismissing the other person.

And the entire difference is not the words said but the tone of voice. As an exercise here, just imagine all the different inflections you can put into the sentence, “How would you be interested in that?”

You can tell quickly which ones are not questions at all but just putdowns.

Now, you may be ready to justify yourself by telling me that you know what the other person is going to answer. And I will say, “If that is true, then why is it that couples discover new things about the person they’re married to in my office every single day if they knew each other so well?”

My answer, of course, is that because they thought they knew, they didn’t go on asking questions with an open and receptive mind. I

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would venture to guess that the person being asked didn’t even know himself as well as he thought he did.

Haven’t you had that same experience, that someone asks you a question that you’d never thought of and it gets you to think about yourself, your choices, or whatever, in a different way? That’s why I say that if it’s done right, it’s fun.

• Listen to the answer Again, we think we know what

the answer is going to be or what the meaning behind it is so we don’t listen carefully. When we listen carefully, a world can open for us. And just to make sure we got it right, we can reflect back what we thought we understood.

• For inspiration, remember when you first fell in love Remember those looooong talks? Remember how there never was enough time to share? Put aside

what you think you know about your partner. Clear some mental space to be open and receptive once again.

Then talk.

And listen.

Dr. Deb Hirschhorn is a Marriage and Family Therapist. She can be reached at 646-54-DRDEB or by writing drdeb@ drdeb.com.

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Health & F tness

How to Fight Off the Flu

By Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN

S

niffling, sneezing, coughing – it’s that time of year again.

With the wind blowing and the cold temperatures eating at your bones, your risk of getting sick is getting higher. According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), one in every five Americans catches the flu each year. The CDC officially announced that the flu season has begun this year. The flu season lasts longer than you think. It can run up until March. Flu symptoms can be mild or severe. Symptoms generally include fever, cough, sore throat, runny nose, body aches and chills.

If you suspect you have the flu see your primary care physician for a flu test. Once diagnosed with the flu, your doctor might prescribe Tamiflu.

Unfortunately, Tamiflu is only effective if started in the first 48 hours of the virus. So if you suspect you have the flu, get it checked out right away.

Tamiflu doesn’t lessen the symptoms of the flu, it only shortens the duration of the virus. If you catch the flu, there’s not much you can do other than take Tylenol or Motrin, drink fluids, and get plenty of rest. Luckily,

there are some things you can do to help prevent catching the flu.

1. Flu shot. Getting the annual flu shot can go a long way.

Many are skeptical of the flu shot and nervous that it will only make them sick, however, the CDC urges all, especially the elderly, children,

phone is covered in germs.

Always wash your hands before eating, touching your eyes, nose or mouth, and when you get home. The same goes for your kids.

School and the workplace is usually where you pick something up and these chances

You may notice that when you are sleepdeprived the common cold tends to come on quickly.

and pregnant women, to get the flu shot.

2. Wash your hands. Germs are everywhere. You may think germs only get passed when someone directly coughs or sneezes on you but you have to realize germs are everywhere. Whether you want to believe it or not, even your

can be reduced by simple handwashing.

3. Get enough sleep. You may notice that when you are sleep-deprived the common cold tends to come on quickly. Sleep deprivation is an open invitation for the common cold. And there’s science behind that. During sleep,

your immune system releases proteins called cytokines.

Cytokines are vital characters during an immune response. They have a role in inflammation and fighting off infections. Sleep deprivation may decrease production of these protective cytokines. In addition, infection-fighting antibodies are also reduced during periods when you don’t get enough sleep. The average adult needs a solid 7-9 hours of sleep each night.

4. Take it easy. Chronic stress releases hormones that suppress our immune system.

Stress results in high levels of cortisol. Cortisol suppresses inflammation during an immune response. If levels are high for a long period of time (due to chronic stress), the body develops a resistance to cortisol and doesn’t respond appropriately. Although most people are immune to stress, try to be as stress-free as possible – for your immune

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

system’s sake.

5. Exercise. Moderate exercise is shown to help your immune system fight infection.

Exercise also helps relieve stress thus indirectly boosting your immune system. At the same time, exercise can help reverse some of the damage caused by sugar intake.

Although it’s a little tougher to exercise when the weather is colder, try to do as much indoor activity as possible. If you are unable to join a gym,

exercise can be done at home too – running up and down steps, jumping jacks, jumping rope, work out videos, or just about anything that gets you moving.

6. Diet. What you eat definitely has an impact on your immune system. Vitamin C is famous for its immune boosting powers. So load up on vitamin C-rich foods. This includes citrus fruits: oranges, grapefruits, lemons, and red peppers, garlic, broccoli,

spinach, and ginger. Vitamin D also helps regulate the immune system and is thought to boost your body’s natural defenses against diseases.

Great sources of vitamin D are yogurt, milk, eggs, and salmon. Vitamin E has also been shown to play a role in a healthy immune system.

Almonds are the best source of vitamin E. Whether you feel a cold coming on or not, try making these changes to prevent anything worse. The flu is

not something you want to catch and if these small changes can help prevent the flu, it’s worth a shot. Stay healthy and stay warm!

Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN, is a Master’s level Registered Dietitian and Certified Dietitian-Nutritionist. She graduated CUNY Brooklyn College receiving a Bachelor’s in Science and Master’s degree in Nutrition and Food Sciences. She is currently a dietitian at Boro Park Center and a private nutrition consultant. She can be reached at CindyWeinberger1@gmail.com.

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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Declutter Your Life How to Create Order in Your Home

By Shifra Steierman

I

t is cold outside. You are stuck indoors. Looking around home you may notice all the clutter. Chanukah is over and there is time until the next yom tov comes around. What better time to tackle an organizing project?

Well, there is good news and bad news. Let’s start with the good news: you can get rid of that clutter. The bad news is that unless you are planning on extending your house, you might have to part with lots of stuff making up the clutter. (Sorry all you packrats!)

Clutter can be defined as any-

thing that you own that is not enhancing your life on a regular basis.

Two common reasons for clutter: things do not have a place to be and we own too many things.

First, look at your home through the eyes of an outsider. Would someone who is not attached to these things hold onto them? Notice that toddler-sized basketball hoop sitting in the corner of the playroom. You have such fond memories of your son growing up on it. But that’s the point – he’s grown. Notice that tablecloth you got as a wedding present that you were saving until you got a

bigger size table. Well, you did. But you also purchased new tablecloths that are much more to your taste and you have never used it yet. (Did you just say you celebrated your 19th anniversary?!) Got the point? Sometimes, it’s just time to say “goodbye!”

When starting a project, particularly an organizing project, recognize that it takes time and energy.

It is important to set aside specific time to tackle the mess. Do not make the mistake of trying to squeeze it in amongst your daily chores. Give it the time that it deserves and you will see results! Once it is done right, it is

much easier to maintain.

Let’s try to attack two common clutter areas.

Playrooms To start, empty your closet of everything. Throw out broken toys, games that are missing pieces, and things that are no longer used. Be very liberal and honest with yourself. Are you really using 17 puzzles?

How about two games of Monopoly?

And that new game that the kids got on Chanukah from your husband’s great-aunt? Did they look at it beyond tearing off the wrapping paper?

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

圀䤀一䔀 ☀ 匀吀䔀䄀䬀䠀伀唀匀䔀

愀琀 琀栀攀 栀椀猀琀漀爀椀挀 爀攀猀漀爀琀 吀愀爀爀礀琀漀眀渀 䔀猀琀愀琀攀 漀渀 琀栀攀 䠀甀搀猀漀渀

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Labeled clear containers create calm out of chaos

Can you give some toys away to an appreciative relative or friend (not me, please!) who is just starting their toy collection? The more you throw out, the less you have to deal with.

Toys that are used infrequently can be stored on upper shelves without taking up prime real estate in the closet.

To create a neat look buy uniform containers to store toys. Containers with straight edges and small lips maximize your space. A 16-quart container with a lid is great for storing Clics, Lego, Magnatiles, blocks, and the like. A matching 6-quart and 66 quart-container can be used to store smaller and bigger items while still maintaining a uniform look.

Containers can be labeled with its contents. You can do this with regular computer labels and magic markers or for a more professional look, invest in a label maker.

Take a look at your empty closet. Where would you like each item placed? Who do you want to reach the toys? Who do you not want to reach the toys? Perhaps games with small pieces are best placed on higher shelves, while toddler-age toys should be readily accessible for... toddlers.

Here is a space-saving technique if you have many puzzles (the cardboard type). Place all the pieces in a Ziploc bag. Cut off the cover with the picture on it and place it in the bag as well. All the bags can be put together in one bin (a 16-quart one works great for this). Viola! Organized and compact!

Label the front of the shelves with the same labels that you placed on the boxes. This makes it easy for kids to return the box to the correct place when cleaning up. Kids also love when you take a picture of the organized closet, print it, and hang it on the inside of the door. This allows for easy reference when cleaning up and makes it fun! (This idea works great for any closet.)

For bigger toys that do not fit in a closet (i.e. play kitchens, riding toys...) make parking spots out of tape on the floor. Kids love putting things back where they go when they know where they belong!

If your playroom doubles as another room in your house (i.e. guest room, study) invest in a stand- up screen to section off and hide the toys when not in use.

Papers Papers! Does the word make you break out in sweat? Are you drowning in them? Getting a system in place for controlling the paper mess will really help reduce the dread of dealing with them. One idea I like to use is an “In Box” and an “Out Box.” These are vertical magazine file holders. Label one “In Box” and one “Out Box.” These boxes should be placed in an easily accessible place.

Be sure to have supplies for handling mail near these boxes such as the checkbook, stamps, envelopes, pens, tape and scissors. If possible they should also be kept near where you keep your file box/cabinet.

All mail that comes through the

File papers you’ll really need in general folders

door is either thrown out or placed in the “In Box.” Pick a time to go through the box one to two times a week – and stick to your plan! At that time, throw out garbage, record any events in your calendar, and take care of papers that can be dealt with immediately. Anything that needs to be filed or taken care of at a later date goes into the “Out Box.” You can also use the “Out Box” for papers that need to be kept for reference such as school calendars, lunch menus, etc.

When the “Out Box” gets too full, go through it and take care of what is in there. File papers in your file box or file cabinet. If need be, make a new file.

The “In Box” and “Out Box” are particularly helpful because they hold the papers vertically. Anything held in vertical fashion is visible, whereas piles of horizontal papers are hiding. When filing papers, keep the system simple. We spend way more time filing papers than retrieving them, so make more general files. For example, if you still get paper credit card statements and you use three different credit cards, you can have one file labeled “credit card statements” and put all statements there. You do not go back to the statements often enough to warrant three separate files. Go through your file drawers/box once a year and eliminate what you can.

When it comes to organizing, there is no one right way to do it.

Build your system around what works best for you and your family. Of course, prevention is the best

A vertical magazine file to organize your papers

medicine. Avoid rash purchases. Before making a purchase, ask the item, “Are you so important that I want to dust, clean, and organize you? Do I want to bump into you every time I need to get to the back of the shelf?

Do I want to have to figure out a way to get rid of you when I discover that I do not need you and you are in my way?” If the answer is “no!” then just leave it. As someone wise once said, “Not wanting something is just as good as owning it!”

Shifra Shteierman, a professional organizer, has been organizing everything that crosses her path for many years. For the past several years, she has been sharing her knowledge and expertise with her satisfied clients. She can be reached at (347) 452-9394.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

In The K

tchen

Lemon Maple Glazed Salmon

By Naomi Nachman

With the start of a new calendar year, many of us are trying to make New Year’s resolutions.

My resolution is to eat healthier foods (like so many of us try to do!) and to include more fish into my family’s diet.

I love this recipe which a friend gave me many years ago and which I tweaked by removing the sugar and replacing it with some natural maple syrup. This glaze will also work on chicken cutlets too. The dill dressing below is a perfect dip for a crudité platter, as a side to a fish main, or for a salad dressing.

Ingredients Salmon 6 slices salmon, 6 oz. each ½ cup soy sauce 2 TBS maple syrup 1 tsp lemon peel zest ¼ cup fresh lemon juice

Dill Sauce 2 TBS finely chopped fresh dill 1/3 cup fresh lemon juice 1 TBS Dijon mustard 2 TBS honey 2 cloves garlic, crushed 1 TBS balsamic vinegar 1 TBS olive oil

Preparation Prepare the Salmon: In a glass bowl mix the marinade ingredients.

Add the slices of fish and marinate for 30 minutes making sure the salmon is well-coated.

Preheat the oven to 350°F. After 30 minutes, remove the salmon from the marinade and place on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper. Bake for 25 minutes or until fish flakes.

Serve with dill sauce.

Prepare the Sauce: Mix ingredients well and store in a glass mason jar for up to 2 weeks in the fridge.

Naomi Nachman, the owner of The Aussie Gourmet, caters weekly and Shabbat/ Yom Tov meals for families and individuals within The Five Towns and neighboring communities, with a specialty in Pesach catering. Naomi is a contributing editor to this paper and also produces and hosts her own weekly radio show on the Nachum Segal Network stream called “A Table for Two with Naomi Nachman.” Naomi gives cooking presentations for organizations and private groups throughout the New York/New Jersey Metropolitan area. In addition, Naomi has been a guest host on the QVC TV network and has been featured in cookbooks, magazines as well as other media covering topics related to cuisine preparation and personal chefs. To obtain additional recipes, join The Aussie Gourmet on Facebook or visit Naomi’s blog. Naomi can be reached through her website, www.theaussiegourmet.com or at (516) 295-9669.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, OCTOBER 29,2018 2015| The | TheJewish JewishHome Home

Notable Quotes “Say What?!”

If you’re Barack Obama and you want to deliver a punch, why not just say it? Why are you playing these games and saying “the 1930s in Germany”; he’s basically comparing this president to Hitler, to the Nazis. Say it!

- Fox’s Ed Henry discussing Barack Obama’s habit of referring to Hitler when talking about President Trump

About time you pardoned General Flynn who has taken the biggest fall for all of you given the illegitimacy of this confessed crime in the wake of all this corruption.

The entire United States is within range of our nuclear weapons, a nuclear button is always on my desk. This is reality, not a threat.

- North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un in his New Year’s address

- Recent tweet to President Trump by Joseph Flynn, Michael Flynn’s brother

Trump Station - The name of the future light rail station which will be constructed near the Kotel

NORTH KOREAN LEADER KIM JONG UN JUST STATED THAT THE “NUCLEAR BUTTON IS ON HIS DESK AT ALL TIMES.” WILL SOMEONE FROM HIS DEPLETED AND FOOD STARVED REGIME PLEASE INFORM HIM THAT I TOO HAVE A NUCLEAR BUTTON, BUT IT IS A MUCH BIGGER & MORE POWERFUL ONE THAN HIS, AND MY BUTTON WORKS! - Tweet, in all caps, by President Trump in response

My liberal friends have stopped inviting me to dinner. They think I’m a Trump supporter. I just call it the way I see it when it comes to the law. If the president likes what I’m saying, fine, but tomorrow they may not like what I’m saying. I’m an advocate for the rule of law and an advocate of the Constitution.

- Alan Dershowitz, on Fox News talking about the “fallout” of his opinion that there is no evidence of collusion with Russia

It was an overwhelming experience – it’s still overwhelming. I don’t know how long it’s going to take for me to get over this feeling.

- Alan Robinson talking to a local TV station in Hawaii about his recent discovery that he and his best friend of 60 years are actually half-brothers

He’s not real!

- An audience member at a Disney World animated production about U.S. presidents trying to settle down another audience member who freaked out when he saw a Trump robot and started shouting, “Lock him up! Lock him up! Lock him up!”

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The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

27

Why would I buy an NFL team if I think the league is in decline?

- Mark Cuban when asked by the Dallas Morning News whether he had any interest in purchasing the recently put-up-for-sale Carolina Panthers

All Israel’s central institutions are in Jerusalem, and ambassadors and embassy staff commute from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem.

- The leader of Romania’s ruling Social Democratic Party, Liviu Dragnea, urging his country to move the Romanian embassy in Israel to Jerusalem

There are 197 countries, like France, Algeria or Germany. There are a few more, but not all other countries in the world agree that they are real countries (for example, the State of Israel or North Korea).

- From a French children’s magazine

Congress, working closely with the President, took a monumental step to bring taxes paid by U.S. businesses in line with the rest of the industrialized world. This tax reform will drive economic growth and create good-paying jobs. In fact, we will increase our U.S. investment and pay a special bonus to our U.S. employees.

- AT&T CEO Randall Stephenson’s statement to employees after the passage of the tax reform bill

Politico published a jaw-dropping, meticulously sourced investigative piece this week detailing how the Obama administration had secretly undermined U.S. law enforcement agency efforts to shut down an international drug-trafficking ring run by the terror group Hezbollah. The effort was part of a wider push by the administration to placate Iran and ensure the signing of the nuclear deal.

Now swap out “Trump” for “Obama” and “Russia” for “Iran” and imagine the eruption these revelations would generate. Because, by any conceivable journalistic standard, this scandal should’ve triggered widespread coverage and been plastered on front pages across the country. By any historic standard, the scandal should elicit outrage regarding the corrosion of governing norms from pundits and editorial boards.

- David Harsanyi, New York Post, op-ed

In the East, it could be the COLDEST New Year’s Eve on record. Perhaps we could use a little bit of that good old Global Warming that our Country, but not other countries, was going to pay TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS to protect against. Bundle up!

- Tweet by President Trump

The people of Iran are finally acting against the brutal and corrupt Iranian regime. All of the money that President Obama so foolishly gave them went into terrorism and into their “pockets.” The people have little food, big inflation and no human rights. The U.S. is watching!

- Tweet by President Trump

The U.S. gov. commits oppression inside the U.S., too. U.S. police murder black women, men, & children for no justifiable reason, and the murderers are acquitted in U.S. courts. This is their judicial system! And they slam other countries’ and our country’s judicial system.

- Response tweet by Ayatollah Khamenei, the current Supreme Leader of Iran

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George Washington…predicted a time when America would lead the world in might. The danger, he said, would be getting sucked into the game of “international leadership” and into the notion that Europeandefined “universal principles” ought to govern our foreign policy rather than our own interests. Our own interests, Washington thought, would often serve those universal principles abroad, but not always. And allowing other nations to redefine liberty itself before making it a central pillar of our foreign policy pillar would be disastrous. That’s why Washington warned in his farewell address that the United States ought not “entangle our peace and prosperity in the toils of European ambition, rivalship, interest, humor or caprice.”

- Ben Shapiro, National Review

New Year’s resolutions: 1. Cultivate female friendships 2. Band together to kill all men – Tweet by Huffington Post editor Emily McCombs

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It’s not only Pakistan that we pay billions of dollars to for nothing, but also many other countries, and others.

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We have taken Jerusalem, the toughest part of the negotiation, off the table, but Israel, for that, would have had to pay more. But with the Palestinians no longer willing to talk peace, why should we make any of these massive future payments to them?

- Recent tweet by President Trump

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Forgotten Her es

Bombs Away!

By Avi Heiligman

HMS Furious armourer with bomb message for the German warship Tirpitz, April 1944

B

ombs have been dropped from the air since the 1850s.

The definition and what is actually considered a bomb varies from one expert to the next. Going into the 20th century these weapons have changed the way war is fought.

Over the years, airmen, soldiers, scientists, engineers and innovators have found unusual ways to strike the enemy. These have had varied effects, from completely obliterating cities with the atomic bomb to physiological warfare by dropping unusual items out of airplanes. Many things have been thrown out at the enemy, and thanks to the U.S. Navy these also include a toilet seat and a kitchen sink.

World War II brought about many innovations that normally would have taken years to develop and made them happen within a matter of years or, in some cases, months. Germany’s V-1 Flying Bomb, launched from a mobile site and a plane, was a low-cost project that brought terror to the cities in Great Britain. The guided missile was first put in action in 1944 – too late to change the course of the war – but wreaked havoc on British and Belgian civilians. The world’s first

guided ballistic missile was the V-2 rocket. 3,000 were launched at similar targets as the V-1 and caused 9,000 deaths. Still, it did not change the course of the war. As the war came to a close, the Western Allies and Russia raced towards the research sites to capture key scientists for future bomb projects.

A bat bomb was a possiblity during World War II

ect. An atomic bomb was exploded on July 16, 1945 in New Mexico. Less than a month later the U-235-filled atomic bomb nicknamed Little Boy was dropped on the Japanese city of Hiroshima. Three days later the Fat Man was dropped on Nagasaki. The devastation that the bombs inflicted on these cities forced Japan to come

To drop a kitchen sink on the enemy is one thing but the folks on the USS Midway really dropped a load on the Vietnamese!

The bomb that was the talk of the scientific world was, of course, the atomic bomb. Thanks to Jewish spy and former MLB catcher Moe Berg the U.S. spy agency had a pretty good idea that the Nazis weren’t even attempting to build a nuclear weapon. Meanwhile, the Americans, under Jewish scientists Robert Oppenheimer and Leo Szilard, were conducting their own atomic research called the Manhattan Proj-

to terms of unconditional surrender.

Many people came up with ideas of how to bomb the enemy. Some worked and some didn’t. One idea that would have made animal lovers go nuts was the idea of the bat bomb.

A dentist was visiting Carlsbad Caverns on the day the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor and couldn’t help but notice the million or so bats that called the caverns home. About a month later he wrote to the White

House outlining a plan to strap bombs to the bats and to drop them from planes flying over Japanese cities. The bats would find refuge all over the islands and soon the place would be aflame. Normally, a plan like this would have been tossed out as mere rubbish but the dentist personally knew First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt and the idea gained traction. A research team set out to try and make this happen but had several setbacks. Over New Mexico a few of the bats were accidentally released and set fire to a barracks and a general’s car at an Air Force base.

The Marines took over the project and had a successful trial run.

Then, after two years and $2 million dollars spent, the project was cancelled. For those in the know (which wasn’t that many people during the war) scientists’ efforts were needed on the Manhattan Project.

In August 1952, American airmen had dropped tons of bombs on Communist forces in Korea. “We dropped everything on them but a kitchen sink,” said Lt. Commander M.K. Dennis to the press. Then he showed them a photo of an AD-4 Skyhawk on the carrier USS Princeton being readied for takeoff with

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

115

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

The "Everything but the Kitchen Sink" bomb

a kitchen sink attached to a bomb.

The admiral-in-command wasn’t pleased but caved into media pressure and the sink was dropped on Pyongyang less than a month later.

To drop a kitchen sink on the enemy is one thing but the folks on the USS Midway really dropped a load on the Vietnamese! A damaged toilet was scheduled to be thrown overboard when one of the plane captains on board had an idea.

Codenamed “Sani-flush” all those who were in the know kept it a se-

The toilet bomb

cret from the higher-ups. The bomb crew fixed it to the bomb rack of Commander Clarence Stoddard’s A-1 Skyraider. As the plane was taxing off the runway, the air boss sent out the message, “What [is] on 572’s right wing?” The toilet was dropped over Vietnam and took the concept of germ warfare to a whole new level.

The idea of using non-traditional types of bombs continues well into the 21st century. A major news article that came out less than a

year ago was the use of the largest non-nuclear bomb the Americans developed called a MOAB (Massive Ordinance Air Blast, which has been nicknamed the Mother of All Bombs). The 21,600 pound bomb was dropped in April on ISIS terrorists in Afghanistan. A Lockheed MC-130 dropped the bomb which killed 94 terrorists and four commanders.

It has been a tradition in the military to write messages intended for the enemy on bombs and artillery

shells. Messages like “Hitler this one’s for you” were scribbled on 500 pound bombs dropped from B-24 bombers over Germany. As war gets more sophisticated with new technology the ideas for interesting and new types of bombs will continue.

Avi Heiligman is a weekly contributor to The Jewish Home. He welcomes your comments and suggestions for future columns and can be reached at aviheiligman@ gmail.com.

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Your

Money

Don't be Fooled by the Word ʻʻSaleʼʼ

By Michelle Singletary

I

t’s the most wonderful time of the year ... for bargain hunters.

Die-hard discount shoppers started hunting for after-holiday deals before the holiday decorations are back in their boxes.

And even as we enter the new year, the stores will still be crowded. You can hear the shrieks of sale excitement from the parking lots as people rush to snag what didn’t sell before December 25.

But in 2018, I want to challenge you to rethink how you view a sale.

Consider this: We have been brainwashed to see a sale as a thrilling event. It’s not. We’ve been bamboozled.

Recently, I invited comedian and behavioral economics advocate Jeff Kreisler to join me for an online discussion about his book, “Dollars and Sense: How We Misthink Money and How to Spend Smarter,” which challenges a lot of financial assumptions.

Kreisler and his co-author, behavioral economist Dan Ariely, take on the widely held belief that sales save you money.

“Basically, since it is so hard for us to assess the real value of almost anything, when something is on sale – when we are presented with a relative valuation – we take the easy way out and make our decision based upon the sale price,” Kreisler and Ariely write.

The authors argue that when we see a sale, we should ignore what

the item used to cost. It’s irrelevant.

Instead, what we should be doing is considering what else we should or could do with the money we might spend on the sale item.

“Think about transactions in terms of opportunity costs by considering more explicitly what we’re sacrificing for what we’re getting,” they write. “Buying a $60 shirt marked down from $100 isn’t ‘saving $40’; it is spending $60.”

During the online chat, one reader remarked that Kreisler’s take on sales was a little too radical.

“I just want to defend SOME sales,” the person wrote. “I’m trying

packs, but if you like a brand of pasta, buy two boxes when it’s on sale.

She’s learning to shop the sales for needs not wants.”

I used to think this way, too. I thought I was born to find a sale.

But over the years, I’ve come to a realization. There are a lot of people who are good shoppers but not necessarily good savers. Sure, you have a pantry full of stuff you got on deep discount. But is your bank account stuffed with enough money for retirement or your child’s college education?

Here’s Kreisler’s defense of his stance that discounts cloud our

"As the proverb goes, 'A fool and her money are soon owners of an industrial-sized vat of laundry detergent.'"

to guide my adult niece, and one of the things I’ve been teaching her is about sales and necessities. Know your prices. Buy your laundry detergent only when it is on sale (preferably with a coupon) and buy the [new] bottle before the [current] one is empty. You don’t run out and you don’t pay full price. Same with toilet paper, shampoo, soap, etc. Don’t be fooled by club prices and multi-

judgment: “I think William Shakespeare put it best when he said, ‘A rose by any other name would still be a sale price designed to make your niece buy laundry detergent.’

I don’t mean to be flippant – OK, I do, but just a little – because I admire your efforts to teach your family good spending habits and think they’re mostly on track ... but off by a bit.”

Before you tune out, hear him out.

If you know detergent is always $5 everywhere and one store puts it on sale for $4, well, sure, that’s a good time to buy, Kreisler says. But what if the detergent used to sell for $5, but the store raised the price to $12 and then puts it on sale for 50 percent off?

It’s on sale, right?

The problem is we often don’t really know whether the sale is truly a discount.

“Vendors don’t just put things on sale because they want you to get a deal,” Kreisler says. “Your niece should know her prices, the amount of money leaving her pocket, but she still shouldn’t be fooled by the words ‘on sale’ because, as the proverb goes, ‘A fool and her money are soon owners of an industrial-sized vat of laundry detergent.’”

Retailers know that we’ve become addicted to the sale. We’ve come to think we’re a chump if we pay full price. So, they do this discount dance with us. They pretend to mark things way down so we feel lifted up by catching it “on sale.”

Here’s my New Year’s challenge for you. As the young adults say, “stay woke.” A sale isn’t necessarily a financial conquest. More often, you’re being played. (c) 2017, Washington Post Writers Group

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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You are cordially invited to a Special Networking Event by the JEWISH BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT (a networking group) and

Wednesday, February 7, 2018 Time: 7:00 PM – 9:30 PM Location: Young Israel of Kew Gardens Hills 7011 150th St., Flushing, NY 11367 Free Parking available at the YCQ lot

Publisher's Report

Yaakov Serle

Celebrating the QJL's 6-Year Anniversary

Special Raffle Drawing Honoring:

Words of Welcome

Rav Yitzchak Yisraeli

Chief Rabbi of the Bukharian community in USA and Canada

Introductory Remarks

Daniel Rosenthal 27th Assembly District Guest Speaker

Delicious Buffet Catered by

Rav Noach Isaac Oelbaum Renowned Posek and Rav of Congregation Nachalas Yitzchak Emcee

Yaniv Meirov

Director of the CHAZAQ organization

Admission is $10 in advance and $15 at the door.

For more information and reservations, Call 718-880-2622 or email:QueensJewishLink@gmail.com.

NYS Assemblyman Michael Simanowitz Bohorodzaner Group

Steller Printing

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120

JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

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The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Your

Money

We Now Interrupt This Broadcast...

By Allan Rolnick, CPA

O

n Sunday, October 30, 1938, Mercury Radio Theatre fans who were listening to Ramon Racquello and His Orchestra were interrupted by a news broadcast reporting an odd explosion on the planet Mars. Soon after, they learned that a cylindrical object had fallen on a farm in Grovers Mills, New Jersey. The radio audience listened in horror as a pulsating Martian emerged from the cylinder and obliterated the crowd with heat rays.

Soon, an entire army of Martians had invaded New York, and very real panic had spread across the country.

Last week, something a bit similar happened in the tax world. (Well, except for the Martians, heat rays, and destruction of Gotham.) After just six weeks of consideration, the House and Senate passed the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act of 2017, the biggest restructuring of the tax code in 31 years.

We don’t usually use these emails to discuss “hard news” like the new tax bill. It’s much more fun to talk about how celebrities use offshore tax havens or harken back to taxes in the 1980s. But this new tax bill is simply too big to ignore. And so we

interrupt our usual broadcast of fun tax stories for something a bit more serious.

We shouldn’t need to tell you much about the nuts and bolts of the new law — the lower tax rates, lower deductions, and new “qualified business income” rules for pass-through

vice is even more important. Most tax professionals do a perfectly good job of putting the “right” numbers in the “right” boxes on the “right” forms. But then they call it a day.

Our real value comes from delivering the proactive concepts and strategies that most tax and financial advisors

It’s much more fun to talk about how celebrities use offshore tax havens or harken back to taxes in the 1980s.

businesses. The news is already full of those discussions. Over the coming days and weeks, we’ll be putting together material explaining how the new bill could affect you.

But we’re going to do things a little different from everybody else.

Most of those news outlets will be writing about how much you’re going to owe under the new law. And that’s important. But we’re going to focus our effort on how you can pay less. And in the end, that ser-

simply overlook.

Of course, we’ll also be highlighting some of the more absurd aspects of the new law. For example: under the old law, you could exclude a whopping $20 of income per month for expenses related to riding your bike to work, so long as you weren’t getting other pretax transit benefits.

The new law lets the air out of that benefit. And how much will putting a nail in that benefit save the Treasury? Austin Powers fans, channel

your best Dr. Evil voice and say it with me: “one ... million ... dollars.” A rounding error, at best.

Here’s another one you might like a little more. Under the old law, Code Section 162 said that members of Congress could deduct up to $3,000 per year for their living expenses while they’re away from their districts. At this point, though, congressional net worths are hitting all-time highs (Montana Rep. Greg Gianforte, who started two software companies, is worth $315 million).

And congressional approval ratings are hitting all-time lows, hovering somewhere around 11%. So the new law eliminates that little boondoggle.

2018 promises to be a busy year, full of opportunity and promise. So count on us to help you navigate the new rules, as you ring in the New Year. And don’t forget, we’ll be here for your family, friends, and colleagues, too.

Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 years in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at allanjrcpa@aol.com.

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

Life C ach

Stretching is Good for You

By Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS

P

roverbs are life’s little guides.

But they often seem so ridiculous.

What does this mean? “Food for thought!” Honestly? Never happened. It’s more like “food for weight”! That’s been my experience.

How about this one? “Cleanliness is next to godliness!” I’ve been clean for years. And I haven’t been deified yet!

“The grass is always greener on the other side.” Not if you have my gardener. Patchy everywhere!

“Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” Why would anyone do that?

“A watched pot never boils!”

Simply not true; boils all the time!

“There’s no place like home.”

Some reactions to this include: Oh yeah, ask a teen. Or, been to a fivestar hotel?

“The early bird catches the worm.” Probably. But who wants a worm?!

“If it ain’t broke don’t fix it!” Why would I? “A picture is worth a thousand words.” Who cares? What am I going to do with a 1,000 words? I’d rather have like a Picasso, worth at least a million dollars! And look at how this other saying complicates that one, “Action speaks louder than words.” So just out of curiosity, what is the ratio of the picture to the ac-

tion?!

“Easy come easy go.” Not with all the traffic these days. Maybe Waze or Google Maps helps things, but no one would say it’s easy!

“The pen is mightier than the sword.” Never saw a pen used in a duel.

“Two heads are better than one!”

Ummmm, no thank you! I’ve never seen anyone go for this idea. And if they did they’d need to meet someone who believes that “beauty is in the eyes of the beholder!”

“Beggars can’t be choosers.” Has the author of this proverb been to the streets of New York? Some person, seemingly living on the streets, asked me for ice cream. I said, “I’m running late for my Sabbath! Can I give you money to get some?” They replied, “I asked for ice cream” and summarily rejected the money. That sounds like a choice to me!

“If you want something done right you have to do it yourself.”

How wrong is this one on so many levels?! You see, my house would be

I thought about becoming an EMT. But then I realized I could save more lives if I stayed home and sewed.

“Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.” What math genius made this statement? I think they mean don’t count your eggs – you certainly know how many chickens you have before they hatch.

“Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.” But this is probably the only time you possibly could, after all, what other hand gets near your mouth?

falling apart with no plumber, electrician, or builder. So who are they kidding? Anyway, even if it were true, if I had to do everything myself, I’d say “right” is overrated!

Finally, what about this one: “A stitch in time saves nine”? I thought about becoming an EMT. But then I realized I could save more lives if I stayed home and sewed.

So now that we’ve seen how ri-

diculous these proverbs are, what are they all about? Let’s talk about literal meanings versus metaphorical, figurative, and proverbial meanings. Saying things in a literal sense uses a word in its most basic or usual way. But a metaphor allows us to stretch.

And we all could use a good stretch!

So, let’s take a saying like “don’t judge a book by its cover.” Taken literally, well, who wouldn’t judge a book by its cover?! The industry pays a lot because they know we do!

So that’s where the metaphor comes in. It makes us think or review past experiences. It makes us stretch and think: remember the book cover can be deceptive. Ah ha! So too the packaging of a human being. The same way books have fooled you – a great cover has belied a bad story – we should give people more of a chance. The metaphor wakes you up to a meaningful image.

So go back and look at all the messages behind each proverb, and you’ll probably find there’s real “food for thought” in this article.

The calories are on me!

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds. com

The Jewish Home | JANUARY 4, 2018

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JANUARY 4, 2018 | The Jewish Home

YOU’RE INVITED TO

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