2023 Winter

BU SINESS NAME

Jamaican American Club Newsletter Winter 2023

Before you marry... know your worth, there is no need to accept less than what you deserve. Look within and ask these 10 questions: 1. Where is this going?

Living in the "now" is great, but eventually the partnership will need a plan or someone will begin to feel anxious. Are you checking in with one another and aware of the other person's expectations?

2. Do I really trust my partner?

Caption describing picture or graphic.

Before you dye the shoes to match the dress, send out the wedding invitations or buy that $2,000 wedding dress, make sure this is the right person to grow old with in marriage. Life is too short and there is no reason to settle for what you really don’t want. When you truly

For some, the immediate response to this can be devastating. If you're one of them, it's time to ask why and how you can begin to build or rebuild trust. Without it, there's no chance.

3. Am I with a good person?

Knowing what you know about your partner today, would you vouch for them if they were a friend?

4. Am I attracted to my partner?

Trivia There Are Roads in Foreign Countries That Honor Jamaica and Jamaicans:

Jamaica Way in Paterson, New Jersey In 2021, Vreeland Avenue, located between 17th and 19th Avenues in the city of Paterson, New Jersey, in the United States was renamed “Jamaica Way” to honor the outstanding contributions made

by Jamaicans to the city.

Physical attraction is hardly the most important component in a relationship, but forcing yourself to be in a relationship with someone who you're not attracted to — just because it's comfortable or "perfect on paper" isn't fair to anyone. You will feel resentful and they will feel rejected.

I N S I D E T HI S IS S UE • Before you marry…

5. Am I a parent or a partner?

Taking care of someone you love is a great thing to do, but when you feel like you're raising a boyfriend — or worse, a husband — things get a little complicated. You'll resent his childish ways. Who wants to sleep with their mom?

6. Does my partner have my back?

Do you feel like you're a part of a loyal team who stands up for one another, supports one another, and shows a united front (even when the other is not around)?

Continue on page 2

• Trivia page 1 • How to avoid destroying you parent child relationship page 2

• Ways to find love page 3 • Book Cub page 4 • Global Innovation Mastermind page 6

P age 2

Continued from page 1 Or, do you feel like you're constantly being thrown under the bus by your mate?

7. Are we looking in the same direction?

Some couples avoid having the big talks (religion, marriage, babies) because they think that, somehow, these things will just "work themselves out". By the time they realize they won't, they're in a complicated, painful situation that leaves one (or both) feeling a little bit duped. If you want kids and your partner thinks you're both "living in the now" and fine with the status quo you're both doing yourselves and one another a disservice (and wasting time).

8. Are we growing together?

Being a human being living on this earth, we all have a right to grow and develop, and create a full life for ourselves. Are you and your partner still indulging in your passions (individual and shared) and growing as individuals?

for a reason. Listen to yourself. 10.

What is my gut telling me?

9. Am I still me?

Being in love with someone should not require changing our identity to fit someone else's idea of who we should be, on any level.

10. What is my gut telling me?

Do you feel like this relationship is healthy and moving at a healthy pace in a positive direction? You have intuition

HOW TO AVOID DESTROYING YOUR PARENT CHILD RELELATIONSHIP

A friend recently shared with me the torment her daughter and family have been going through over the past year, and some awful memories came rushing back. Memories of a childhood where overweight was a curse met with bullying and ridicule, even by the people who claimed to love you. In those years and in our country, Jamaica, depression wasn’t (believed to be) a real thing. The feelings of self- loathing you developed because everyone else treated you like a pariah were simply you being a spoiled baby.

Much of that is still the same in any ethnic or social group. As a result, parents are often blamed for not recognizing the signs of a troubled childhood. But many parents see the issues up close and personally, and dismiss them as kids being kids. It is not from a lack of love, but a lack of understanding, especially if you’ve never been the victim of psychological assault yourself. CONTINUE ON PAGE 10

J am aic an Ameri can Cl ub N e wsle tter

P age 3

Ways to find love

What is it really? Is it a feeling, your natural instinct or a political move? Everyone has their own interpretation of what this word is and why most people crave for it. Over 50% of the songs are about this thing. Who would you like to share it with? Ask yourself as well as the potential mate these questions: 1. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

2. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

3. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

4. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

5. What do you value most in a friendship?

6. What is your most treasured memory?

7. What is your most terrible memory?

8. What does friendship mean to you?

9. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

Book Club Click on image

Click on image

Empower Your Finances Caribbean Women of Influence!

Professional women of color worldwide are increasingly becoming leaders in various industries and sectors. Against this backdrop, they face unique challenges that often hinder their progress towards career breakthroughs and establishing a sustainable financial future.

In examining the statistics, Global Innovative Mastermind, GIM, has chosen to focus on the Caribbean; a region rich in culture, diversity and resilience; where women of Caribbean heritage throughout the Diaspora, have consistently demonstrated their strength and determination in the face of adversity.

Pioneers such as Grace Jones (decades of influence); U.S Rep. Yvette Clarke; upcoming scientist Jerelle Joseph;track star Shelly-Ann Fraser Pryce; and Fenty originator, Rihanna; have each proactively undertaken unique initiatives while leveraging their strengths. We see them as living examples of women with self-determination who advocate for themselves and their communities while investing in continuous learning, self-care and skill development. GIM

has therefore taken the initiative to offer a new course in the New Year. This groundbreaking course is intended to share the insights, strategies and techniques which will strengthen women as we engage in a transformative journey towards personal economic empowerment and financial fitness. It is tailored towards women of Caribbean heritage and those with affinity to Caribbean culture whether in the corporate or not-for-profit sector. Stay tuned for further information at the GIM media channels.

Click on image

Click on image

Click on image

Click on image

Click on image

United We Bargain Continued from page 2 Divided We Beg! For the child who suffers, the dismissiveness of the parent may hurt more than whatever stress they’re enduring from their peers.

Parents seem to have a habit of blaming their children for being children.

Rarely do they acknowledge that they too, as parents, make mistakes and aren’t perfect. They too have been careless and suffered preventable loss or injury, not because they are bad people, but simply because they are human.

Probably wanting to live a perfect life vicariously through their children, they judge their kids much more harshly than they do themselves. It’s a troubling dynamic.

For my friend, her child’s reaction to bullying and personal insecurity ran the gamut from self-cutting, to an attempted suicide. In my own family I recently learned that one of my sisters went through a long period of depression because of our parent’s reaction to a robbery she survived. Our parent blamed her for being where she wasn’t supposed to be, instead of rallying to give her emotional support through this near-death experience.

Over ten years later, the damage from that reaction is still being undone. But I’m happy to confirm that my sister is a beautiful young woman with an amazing life ahead of her. With therapy and time, hopefully my friend’s daughter will also grow into a greater purpose. She’s planning on writing a book about her experiences so that parents don’t miss the warning signs before it’s too late to help their relationships with their own children, or even save their kids’ lives.

I don’t have any children of my own, but having been a troubled child and seeing lots of the parent-child dynamic from the outside, I have one piece of advice to parents. Find a way to teach your child that actions can have consequences they won’t be happy with, without making them feel like they deserve the bad things that happen if they make a wrong decision. Blaming your child for their own suffering will only make them feel crappy, and if you’re a good parent, possibly make you feel worse.

Calibe Thompson is a video media producer, speaker and author. Learn more about her services at http://www.islandsyndicate.com and share your thoughts on these and other opinion pieces on Facebook @calibethompson.

Contact: JamaicanAmericanClub@yahoo.com Www.JamaicanAmericanClub.org Jamaican American Club PO Box 62 Elk Grove, IL 60009 USA