May 2013 Island Parent

Island Parent Celebrating

25 Years

The Resource Publication for Vancouver Island Parents

May 2013

Yo Mama! tips, advice & Ramblings

Braving Mother-Daughter Relationships Advice: Helpful or Not? Readers Respond The Delicate Balance in Young Adult Novels

Books for the Maternally Inclined Community Connections for New Parents

New & Expectant Parents Products & Services

children’s boutique

• Shoes • Clothing • Toys

SUMMER COLLECTIONS ARE HERE!

Newborn to 12 years

DOWNTOWN

624 Fort St 250 360 2570

BROADMEAD VILLAGE

777 Royal Oak Dr 250 360 2520

www.scallywags-island.ca

Nature Preschool AT SWAN LAKE

KIDS BELONG OUTDOORS!

A NEW community partnership between the District of Saanich and Swan Lake Nature Sanctuary. A full year preschool program for ages 3-5 years, bridging early childhood education and ecoliteracy through an experiential, child-centred approach.

EXPLORE | EXPERIMENT | CONNECT | PLAY This exciting new play-based preschool will help encourage, preserve and enrich a sense of wonder in children while building a strong and lasting connection with the natural environment.

Call Chris Filler - 250.475.7107

Contents: May 2013 Feature

Braving Mother-Daughter Relationships....................................................... 16

Articles

Yo! Mama....................................................................................................... 9 Community Connections for New Parents.................................................... 10 The Lines of a Story...................................................................................... 12 Books for the Maternally Inclined................................................................. 14 Products & Services for New Parents............................................................ 20 Advice: Helpful or Not?................................................................................ 26 The Delicate Balance in Young Adult Novels................................................. 30 Mission Mompossible................................................................................... 40 Active Play Through Music........................................................................... 41 The Bigger Picture......................................................................................... 42 Growing Up Bilingual................................................................................... 44 Welcome to Holland..................................................................................... 45

Columns

Editor’s Note................................................................................................... 3 Healthy Families; Happy Families................................................................. 46 Dadspeak...................................................................................................... 48 Just Eat It!..................................................................................................... 50 Is There an App for This?.............................................................................. 52 New Parent Pages.......................................................................................... 56 Maternity & Beyond..................................................................................... 60 Nature Notes................................................................................................ 62 Cut It Out..................................................................................................... 64

Departments

IPM Notes....................................................................................................... 4 Up-Island Business Directory......................................................................... 25 Party Directory........................................................................................ 28, 29 Family Calendar............................................................................................ 32 Around the Island......................................................................................... 38 Family Services Directory........................................................................ 54, 55 Preschool & Child Care Directory........................................................... 58, 59 South Island Business Directory.................................................................... 63 Island Parent Magazine, produced by Island Parent Group Enterprises Ltd., is a monthly publication that honours and supports parents by providing information on resources and businesses for families, and a forum for the exchange of ideas and opinions. Views expressed are not necessarily those of the publisher. Letters (max 250 words) should be emailed to the Editor at editor@islandparent.ca. No material herein may be reproduced without the permission of the Editor. Unsolicited manuscripts are welcome and should be emailed to editor@islandparent.ca.

Island Parent Magazine is distributed free in selected areas. Subscriptions can be obtained by sending $28.00 (HST included) with your name and address to the address below. Canada Post: Canadian Publications Mail Sales Product Agreement 40051398.

Island Parent Magazine

Suite A-10, 830 Pembroke St, Victoria, BC V8T 1H9 Tel: 250-388-6905 Toll Free: 1-888-372-0862 Websites: www.islandparent.ca, www.kidsinvictoria.com

On the Cover: Photo by Marie Brown from Premier Photography, 250-686-3227, www.premierphotography.ca

2 Island Parent Magazine

President, Publisher: Paul Abra Vice-President: Anna Abra Director, Production Manager: Mada Moilliet Editor: Sue Fast Sales & Marketing: RaeLeigh Buchanan Publisher’s Assistant: Linda Frear Bookkeeping: Elaine Francis Distribution: Anna Abra, Ted Dawe (Mid-Island) Founders: Jim Holland & Selinde Krayenhoff Production: Eacrett Graphic Design Printed at Island Publishers Cover printed at Hillside Printing ISSN 0838-5505

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Sleep In? Dream On

S

leep.

That, according to Huffington Post, is what most women want for Mother’s Day. Based on a poll of over 19,000 women, the survey, conducted by Plumdistrict.com, revealed that eight out of 10 moms would prefer to sleep in on Mother’s Day than be woken up for an early breakfast in bed— even if that breakfast consisted of freshly baked orange-brioche cinnamon rolls paired with blackberry-lavender jam and a sparkling Bellini. And even if all brioche crumbs were removed from the sheets.

Along with extra sleep, other items on the list included: an hour for a favourite activity such as a bike ride or a hike; a handmade card; one out of three moms said she secretly wanted the day to herself; one out of three said she’d like to choose her own gift; and another one out of three moms said she would rather have pizza and milk with the kids at home, while two out of three said they’d prefer wine and filet mignon at a fancy restaurant.

Dinner at home was fine, tweeted one respondent, but what she really wanted was a German Shepherd puppy. Or an Audi Allroad.

An Audi Allroad? And to think I was happy with a gilded bow-tie pasta picture frame. And a mushy kiss. Or three.

Homemade gifts are among a mom’s favourites. According to Time magazine’s What Moms Really Want for Mother’s Day—and What They Don’t, a safe bet is “something that is hand-made by the family…a gift that really reflects a thought process that goes into it.”

Gifts to avoid, according to Time, include the C2S metallic pink Taser, billed as “The perfect gift, just in time for Mother’s Day.”

Why it’s not ideal? “Someone will invariably be tased after Mom opens it. And not only that, but it requires a background check, which spoils the surprise.”

Another one to avoid, according to the article, is the USB Metallic I Love You Hand Gesture Necklace Flash Drive, guaranteed to give Mom a stylish look. A rule of thumb when it comes to jewelry: If it connects to a computer and stores up to 16 gigabytes of data, it’s probably not ideal.

Last year, the National Retailer Federation predicted that the average person celebrating Mother’s Day would spend $152.52 on gifts, up from $140.73 spent on average per person the previous year. Total spending was expected to reach $18.6 billion. $18.6 billion?

Considering that all most moms want is an extra hour to sleep in, $18.6 billion seems like a lot to spend.

If you’re wondering how much to spend on Mother’s Day this year, check out the American Coalition for Labor Reparations (ACFLR) website. The ACFLR, a “public initiative whose goal is simple: compensate mothers for their labor”, has devised an effective online tool. Now, using the organization’s online form, you can calculate how much you owe your own mom, or how much your kids owe you. All you have to do is plug in a few numbers, starting with a base labour fee,(the child’s birth year and the number of hours that you/your mother was in labour).

Other charges and deductions include: forced sobriety (calculated by using the number of missed drinks); gross stuff that happened to mom during pregnancy (including, but not limited to, flatulence, incontinence and emesis); weight gain; emotional stability

(consult with Dad); baby’s navel formation (more is owed if child ended up with an innie, less if child ended up with an outie); birth punctuality (the amount owed depends

Editor’s Note Sue Fast upon whether or not child vacated the uterus early, later or on time); birth order (based on how familiar mom was with childbirth when each child was born); stretch marks (the bigger the baby, the more mom’s skin was stretched); good offspring deduction (deduct 80 per cent of total charges if you/ your children call mom on Mother’s day, add $100 to the total, if not).

According to my calculations, based on the pregnancy, labour and delivery of three healthy children—all over eight pounds at birth, with innie belly buttons, and displaying varying degrees of good behaviour over the years—they collectively owe me enough to buy that piece of waterfront property I’ve been eyeing since their rather lengthy births.

And if children can’t afford to pay the full amount of their debt up front? No problem.

The ACFLR has thought of that, too. Just complete the Promissory Note at the bottom of the form and mom will be sent an e-mail declaring her child’s intention to pay along with a promissory note that she can present in the future to collect payment.

With that in mind—and with over 62 homemade Mother’s Day gift certificates, to date, promising everything from clean dishes, a home-cooked meal, and a walked dog, to a camping trip, new windshield wiper blades, and a week in Paris—maybe I’ll opt for that extra hour of sleep.

Happy Mother’s Day.

Summer learning camps… find the clues...learn where those words and numbers hide.... create your own kit-bag of games and strategies!

Math and language arts options available the weeks of August 12–16 and August 19–23 Sidney, Victoria and the Westshore Call 250-388-7225 for information about camp schedules and our remedial services

www.readsociety.bc.ca

www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013 3

IPM Notes Smile with Confidence Camosun’s Certified Dental Assistant (CDA) students are getting ready for the annual spring preventive dental health public clinic. The clinic welcomes clients between the ages of 5 and 21.

Good oral hygiene reduces the risk of tooth decay and gum disease—to give you a nicer smile.

When: May 1-17 (afternoon and evening appointments available) Where: Dental building, Lansdowne campus, 3100 Foul Bay Road Services: selective polishing; x-rays; sealants; oral hygiene instruction; fluoride application Cost: $20 or less This personal care is provided by CDA students, under the supervision of licensed program faculty, as directed by a dentist.

For more information, visit camosun. ca/smile. For an appointment, phone 250370-3184.

Camosun College Open House & Career Fair 2013 On Thursday May 2, from 8:30am-

2:30pm, Camosun’s Interurban Campus is opening its doors and inviting everyone to stop by and experience first-hand what this community college offers. The annual Open House and Career Fair will feature a full range of hands-on activities that showcase post-secondary and career options.

More than 2,000 middle school and secondary students are expected to visit the campus during the day. Adults of all ages are also welcome to attend.

All areas of the campus are open, from the Trades shops at one end to the Pacific Institute for Sport Excellence (PISE) at the other. Programs based at Lansdowne campus will also be setting up displays and activities at Interurban, giving visitors a true college-wide experience.

Highlights include a wheelchair obstacle race (Sport & Exercise Ed.), a Spaghetti Bridge Contest, building a one-string electric guitar (Electronics), the Mr. Wizard science show (Chemistry), a compressed air rocket launch (Mechanical Engineering), a nail-driving contest (Carpentry), drumming workshops (Aboriginal Education), and Victoria Conservatory of Music student performances, among other events.

The full list of activities, updated daily, is available at www.camosun.ca/openhouse.

New Kids’ Workshop Series The Greater Victoria Compost Education Centre has added the Gardeneers workshop series to its roster of children’s programs.

Starting in May, kids can get involved once a month in the teaching garden for Saturday adventures. Staff and kids will be planting, growing, harvesting, and, of course, eating.

Themes will focus on composting, gardening, and producing food in an urban setting.

The first workshop, Incredible Edibles, is for children aged 9-11 and will take place on Saturday May 4 from 12:15-1:45 pm.

Participants will develop a connection to their food through hands-on explorations of soil ecology and plant biology. Each child will bring home their own edible container garden and all participants will work together to prepare and eat a dish from our gardens.

Dates: One Saturday per month, full schedule to be announced soon. Ages: 6-8 and 9-11, depending on the workshop.

Cost: $5-$10 sliding scale, no one turned away. Location: Greater Victoria Compost Education Centre, 1216 North Park Street.

To register, please visit compostkids. eventbrite.ca or phone 250-386-9676.

“A stunning documentary that fills the screen with millions of orange and black butterflies...” “… reminiscent of March of the Penguins in terms of its ability to tug at heartstrings… this miniature underdog story manages to take on human scale” 4 out of 4 stars

SHACKLETON’S A N TA R C T I C A D V E N T U R E

Opens May 17 in conjunction with the new Royal BC Museum exhibit Race to the End of the Earth

“It’s a detective story, a love story and an action flick. And it’s about butterflies.”

250-480-4887 • imaxvictoria.com

4 Island Parent Magazine

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Fifth Annual Butterfly Ball The Queen Alexandra Foundation for Children (QAF) presents a sparkling gala celebrating daughters and their dads (granddads are welcome, too). All girls ages 6-16 and their dads or father figures are invited to attend the fourth annual Butterfly Ball on May 4 from 4:30-9:30pm at the Marriott Hotel Inner Harbour, 728 Humboldt Street.

The evening includes a sumptuous dinner buffet, silent and live auctions of items for all ages, and dancing until 9:30pm. Dress to impress and enjoy a wonderful evening in support of Island children and youth with special needs and their families. The Butterfly Ball is an elegant fundraiser to help QAF provide programs, services and initiatives for children and youth.

Tickets are $125 per dad and $75 per daughter and include a partial tax receipt.

Proceeds go to Children’s Health Foundation of Vancouver Island. Space is limited.

For information and tickets, phone 250519-6955 or visit childrenshealthvi.org.

Carnation Campaign On May 9-11, hundreds of volunteers in Victoria and Duncan will take part in a tradition that began in 1976: the Multiple Sclerosis Carnation Campaign. The reason is simple: to end multiple sclerosis.

MS Carnation Campaign HOPE volunteers will show their dedication to finding a cure by selling carnations at several locations throughout Victoria and Duncan—on street corners, in malls and at other public spaces. In B.C. and the Yukon, volunteers expect to sell over 20,000 blooms to raise funds for research and provide free supports and services in our communities. Watch for your opportunity to exchange a donation for a carnation, or you can donate online at www.mssociety.ca.

The carnation is Canada’s oldest and most recognized symbol of hope in the search for a cure for multiple sclerosis. Many of those Canadians living with multiple sclerosis are mothers. Others, either children or adults, have mothers affected by this disease, and women are diagnosed with MS three times as often as men. That’s why every year the MS Carnation Campaign takes place on Mother’s Day weekend in May. May is also MS Awareness Month. For a list of activities taking place this month and for more information, please visit www.mssociety.ca.

The Magical, Musical, Mother’s Day Garden Tour The Victoria Conservatory of Music’s www.IslandParent.ca

31st Annual Mother’s Day Garden Tour takes place on May 11 and 12. Eight wonderfully creative gardeners have opened their private oases for this tour only, and two public gardens offer amenities including an opportunity for a lunch stop. At many of the gardens, strollers will enjoy musical accompaniment by Conservatory artists and are invited to converse with the on-site master gardeners. A plant sale and silent auction will also take place over the weekend. Early ticket purchase is recommended for this event.

The self-guided tour includes gardens from Oak Bay to James Bay, North Saanich to the Uplands. Participants will step inside intriguing, unexpected private paradises among which they will find a nondescript lot in the middle of suburbia transformed with imagination and ingenuity, a garden filled with native plants, Garry Oak trees and blackberry-eating miniature donkeys, a writer’s retreat, and more. Every garden on the tour holds delightful surprises and gardening inspiration.

A description of each of the gardens on this year’s tour is available at www.vcm. bc.ca/victoria-garden-tour. Full information access to each garden is provided on the admission ticket. Tickets for the two-day garden tour are $30 and are on sale at Thrifty Foods, most gardening stores, and at the Victoria Conservatory of Music, 900 Johnson Street. Tickets are also available online through the Conservatory website and by phone at 250-386-5311. All proceeds go to support the Victoria Conservatory of Music.

Mother’s Day Paint-In & Craft Fair at Royal Roads On Sunday May 12 from 10am-4pm, you can drop by the 18th annual Mother’s Day Paint-In and Craft Fair at Royal Roads University, located in beautiful Hatley Park National Historic Site, and experience a community outdoor festival where more than 3,000 visitors are expected.

Enjoy local artisans who will feature hand-sculpted and painted glass art, organic seasonings, fudge, jewelry, pottery, garden stepping stones and home grown plants, among other things. Sparkle Shack is on site with extreme face painting, air brush body painting, and tatoos. Learn more from community leaders who will share Colwood’s heritage and community initiatives, power smart conservation tips, and fun interactive activities.

Along with the work of local artists and craftspeople, School District 62 and West

“When one tugs at a single thing in Nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world.”

John Muir Allow your child to grow and learn in the Natural environment provided on our 2 acre play yard. We support and practise with a strong Reggio Emilia influence, and a child centred curriculum.

We have space available for September… so register early to secure your spot.

Our philosophies are based on “learning outdoors in nature through experimenting”…we are the original OUTDOOR Daycare you have asked for!

Please call us to register:

250-590-3603

Like us on Facebook and find recent pics!

www.lexieslittlebears.com

Pregnant?

Pregnancy is a state of health.

Midwives recognize what an extraordinary time this is in your life and we are available to support you through your childbearing year.

Covered by Your BC Health Care BC’s Medical Services Plan pays for midwifery care, including in-home check-ups in labour and after you’ve had your baby. You can self-refer to a midwife.

Quality Care Studies show that midwifery clients have lower rates of episiotomies, infection, Caesarean sections, forceps and vacuum deliveries and newborns that require resuscitation.

Choice of Hospital or Home Birth Continuity of Care Comprehensive Care Breastfeeding Education & Support We would be pleased to schedule an appointment to answer your questions about midwifery care.

www.midwivesinvictoria.ca May 2013 5

IPM Notes Shore Arts Council will host a student fine art exhibit. Other highlights will include a variety of family entertainment, main-stage performances, children’s craft station and complimentary access to Hatley Castle and the gardens, with the opportunity to join a guided tour of Hatley Castle. The museum and gift shop will also be open in the lower level of Hatley Castle. For more information, visit www.hatleypark.ca.

CPS Art Contest: Friendly Advice from Canadian Kids The theme for this year’s art contest is the importance of friendships. The Canadian Paediatric Society (CPS) is asking Canadian children and youth to consider what it means to be a good friend, and why friends are so important.

Young artists can enter the contest with a drawing or painting that illustrates how friends and friendships keep them happy and healthy.

Participants can win one of four Chapters gift cards, and 12 pieces will be chosen to appear in the 2014 CPS member calendar.

To be eligible for the early bird gift card

draw, entries must be received by May 21, 2013. Final deadline is June 28, 2013.

The contest is open to all children and youth under the age of 18 who live in Canada. For full contest details, download the contest entry form, contact 613-5269397, ext. 234, or email lindsayc@cps.ca.

Selkirk Waterfront Festival Be captivated by the fun, food and festivities of the 2013 Selkirk Waterfront Festival on Saturday May 25 from 10am-3pm. See beautiful works from talented artisans as you wander the vendors’ market, tantalize your tastebuds with a variety of flavourful foods, dance and sway to the rhythm of various entertainers including Victoria jazz and blues singer Maureen Washington, and thrill your wild side with incredible carnival rides in the family fun zone. The international café will include traditional cooking from around the world. Authentic Italian pizza baked onsite in a wood-fired oven, Jamaican patties and Belgian waffles will all be available.

There’s face painting, balloon twists, a tattoo station and a craft zone. Kids, families, and folks of all ages will have fun at this annual free, family-friendly event that takes place along the Selkirk Waterfront.

For a map, entertainment schedule, and

Join us at ICE Victoria for a week of summer hockey school!

• Our hockey camps are a great way for players to learn to love the game.

• We have the smallest group size and most hours of ice time than any other school!

• We’ve partnered with Sport Ball to provide a great experience for all our little players.

Call or see website:

250-590-7811

icevictoria.ca 6 Island Parent Magazine

other information, phone the Burnside Gorge Community Centre at 250-388-5251 or visit www.burnsidegorge.ca.

Island Children’s Festival Come celebrate children, families, and our community at the 2nd annual Island Children’s Festival on May 25 from noon5pm. Set in the idyllic countryside at the Island Montessori school grounds (5575 West Saanich Road), the festival features a unique program of children’s entertainment and activities focused on health, sustainability, and community engagement.

Fred Penner, acclaimed family entertainer and two-time Juno winner for “Best Children’s Album,” will be headlining the festival. The festival will also feature children’s singer and songwriter, Shé, a mad science demonstration, face painting, arts and crafts, games, local food, and much more.

The Island Children’s Festival proudly supports the Island Education Access Fund, which provides financial assistance to lowincome families and children with special needs by helping them access support and education based on a model of caring, respect, and inclusion.

Tickets are $10 and are free for children five years old and under. They are available at all Megson FitzPatrick locations. Tickets are limited so hurry and get yours today!

For more information, visit www.islandchildrensfestival.com.

Pole Painting in Fernwood Take part in the 2nd annual Fernwood Pole Painting Project all day on Saturday May 25. You, your kids, your friends, and your neighbours are invited to paint a telephone pole as a permanent art piece for the Fernwood neighbourhood. Help cover the poles throughout Fernwood with colour and designs. There will be a free Celebration BBQ in Fernwood Square from noon-2pm.

Pick up your Pole Painting Kit—only 100 available—containing instructions, paint, signage, and more, at 1313 Gladstone Avenue during the week of May 20-24 between 9am-5pm. You are welcome to use these materials or bring your own (for example, brushes, smock, etc.). Visit www. fernwoodnrg.ca to find a “how to guide” for pole painting or to find out more about a design and stencil making workshop. If you would like to paint a pole, or touch up poles that have already been painted, email polepainting@fernwoodnrg.ca.

www.kidsinvictoria.com

World Partnership Walk For 27 years, on the last Sunday in May—this year on May 26—hundreds of families will make their way to the Cameron Bandshell in Beacon Hill Park to participate in the 28th annual World Partnership Walk, Canada’s largest event in support of international development. Registration begins at 10am and opening ceremonies commence at 11am.

After a few words from guest of honour, Dr. David Turpin, president and vice-chancellor of the University of Victoria, and a warm up with Vicki Waters Jazzercise, the group will make its way along Dallas Road to Clover Point, ending the round trip with a hot lunch and toe-tapping entertainment by the Vic High Band.

Your Local Consignment Stores Sailor Jack Family Consignment Store • Stylish infant, kids & teen clothing • Toys & equipment • Maternity & women’s wear • New baby shoes, carriers and accessories 424 Craigflower Rd, Victoria 250-382-5225 www.sailorjack.ca

At Kinderbeez you will always find: • A huge selection of high quality, gently used children’s and maternity items including toys, books, shoes, clothing, furniture, strollers and more.

• A great variety of popular new brands including BOB, Britax, Melissa and Doug, TUFFO, Sophie, Amber teething and more

Kinderbeez Children’s Consignment Store • New and gently used name brand children’s and maternity items • Toys, books, shoes, clothing, furniture, strollers and more • BOB, Britax, Sophie, Melissa and Doug and more One hundred per cent of the funds raised are used to help communities in the poorest regions of Asia and Africa with initiatives in education and literacy, agriculture, clean water, and health care. Families in Victoria are an important part of this solution to global poverty.

This year’s Tots and Tykes team will be led by Eliott Majcher. Children aged eight and under can join Eliott’s team and help raise awareness and funds to help tots and tykes in Africa and Asia. A special children’s area will feature balloons, and face-painting provided by Par-T-Perfect. Sportball will also be onsite keeping everyone active.

The World Partnership Walk is a green initiative, so bring your water bottle, and help make this walk environmentally friendly.

For more information and to register at no cost, visit www.worldpartnershipwalk.com.

Bike to Work Week Bike to Work Week (BTWW), from May 27-June 2, encourages and promotes the use of the bicycle as transportation to work.

BTWW is for everyone—from cycling pros to brand new riders—so tell your family and friends. Join the 19th annual Greater www.IslandParent.ca

110-2763 Beverly Street, Duncan 250-748-2345 kinderbeez@shaw.ca

Baja Rosi’s Consignment Cabana The place to spice up your wardrobe!

• Victoria’s Largest and Most Fun Consignment Experience!

• Hundreds of new arrivals…DAILY! • Clothing for women 13-93, including PLUS sizes

• A bright, organized, inspirational and clean shopping environment.

• Friendly, knowledgeable staff who will always greet you and your children with a smile.

• A child friendly environment. Our store is designed to allow your kids freedom from the “no touch” rules, allowing you to shop peacefully in a family respectful surrounding.

• A sense of community. We are a 100% mom run, Island owned business.

Community is extremely important to us. We have dedicated ourselves to providing the absolute best in customer service, and community awareness.

• New seasonal and fresh stock daily.

• Casual styles for men

Abra-Kid-Abra

• Open 7 days

New & Used Toys, Clothing & Furniture

• No appt. necessary *see web for details

• Playroom for children

• Baby equipment & furniture rentals • New products include dress up, ballet clothes, rainwear, sunwear, shoes, toys, carriers, cloth diapers, and much more

103 – 797 Goldstream Ave, Victoria 250-391-6033 www.bajarosis.com

2024 Oak Bay Ave, Victoria, BC 250-595-1613 www.abra-kid-abra.com

• Track your sales online • Payouts on demand

May 2013 7

IPM Notes Victoria Bike to Work Week. With events planned throughout the week, there are many celebration stations, great food, lots of fun, and thousands of dollars in prizes.

How do you win prizes? You need to be registered on a team or fill in a prize ballot form at a celebration station. Prizes are drawn daily, Monday to Friday during Bike to Work Week, as well as afterwards.

For information on BTWW registration, bike safety, and for other BTWW resources, please visit www.biketowork.ca/victoria.

Grow a Row Lots of people are growing food in their backyards and in community gardens. There are stages in every garden when there are simply too many tomatoes to eat. Meanwhile, there are plenty of people in our community who don’t have access to this sort of wonderful fresh produce. The easy solution is to distribute extra produce from local gardens to local people who would like to eat it. Last year, Grow a Row received more than 1,600 kgs of donated food from gardeners and farmers in and around Victoria. This year’s goal is for 2,000 kgs.

The Grow a Row project allows gardeners—experienced or beginners—to help others in an innovative way by donating an extra row of produce from their gardens.

Gardeners will have access to weekly dropoff locations where staff and volunteers will weigh all the fruit and vegetables and give it to local transition centres such as Our Place Society, school food programs and community food banks. The program also allows beginner gardeners to learn how to garden organically through workshops and skill-sharing with the Grow A Row community. Check out the Grow A Row website and blog for updates on drop-off locations, free workshops, and special events at www. vicgrowarow.org.

New Guide to User-Friendly Trails A new publication of easy-to-use trails to walk, wheel and hike in the outdoors is now available in Greater Victoria. A Guide to User-Friendly Trails is a pilot project developed through a partnership between CRD Regional Parks, the Intermunicipal Advisory Committee on Disability Issues (IACDI) and West Shore Parks & Recreation.

The guide contains 48 pages of full color photographs, maps and descriptions of userfriendly trails within the Capital Regional

Danielle’s Paint-your-own Pottery and Glass Fusing Studio * Pro-D Fun Days * March Break Specials * * Classes and Workshops * * Birthday Parties * Corporate Events * Diva Nights * * Summer Camps * Drop-ins always welcome… no experience necessary!

129-735 Goldstream Ave Langford, BC V9B 2X4 250-590-7949

www.daniellestudios.ca www.facebook.com/danielle.pyop info@daniellestudios.ca

Helping Hands Doula Services Supporting the new family through birth and the early postpartum period

Jay Duncan

DONA trained Birth and Postpartum Doula Lamaze Certified Childbirth Educator

250-595-1938

Cell: 250-217-1926

mama_jay@hotmail.com

www.helpinghandsvictoriadoula.blogspot.ca Find Helping Hands Doula Services on Facebook

8

Island Parent Magazine

District parks and the West Shore municipalities. The guide highlights trails that are welcoming to all ages and individuals with diverse levels of mobility and endurance.

It provides visitors with trail profiles and information to enable them to determine which parks and amenities to visit based on their own levels of ability. Also, A Guide to User-Friendly Trails highlights the benefits of being active in the outdoors. It showcases local photographers’ images of beautiful landscapes, native species and local residents on the trails.

Pick up A Guide to User-Friendly Trails at Capital Regional District offices, recreation centres, and Westshore municipal halls. It is available to download at www. westshorerecreation.ca/userfriendlytrails.

2013 Ready, Set, Solve Program After spending two months developing real-world solutions for local governments, institutions and non-profit organizations, more than 60 students from Royal Roads University, Camosun College and the University of Victoria celebrated their work at the second annual Ready, Set, Solve award ceremony in April. Ready, Set, Solve is a program hosted by the Capital Regional District (CRD), with support from BC Hydro that matches teams of students with organizations to solve local sustainability challenges. The program offers a chance for post-secondary students to gain practical experience while supporting organizations that are taking action on climate change.

First place was awarded to a team of students from Camosun College that created an inventory of bicycle infrastructure and mapped cycling routes in the Township of Esquimalt.

Second place was awarded to a Royal Roads team that developed a youth climate action summer camp for the City of Victoria’s Parks & Recreation Department. Third place was secured by a team from UVic that designed a natural outdoor playground for the Oaklands Community Centre. All 18 teams took home prizes and new experiences to add to their resumes.

“The Ready, Set, Solve Program offers a direct benefit to organizations in the CRD, but the lessons learned can be applied in communities across the province,” says Eric Beevor-Potts, Community Investment Specialist with BC Hydro. Each organization will now start implementing the proposed solutions. A summary of each challenge and team results can be found at www.crd.bc.ca/ readysetsolve.• www.kidsinvictoria.com

Yo! Mama Top 10 Mom Blogs

according to Babble.com

Wisdom, Tips, Advice & Ramblings

“I always imagined when I was a kid that adults had some kind of inner toolbox full of shiny tools: the saw of discernment, the hammer of wisdom, the sandpaper of patience. But then when I grew up I found that life handed you these rusty bent old tools— friendships, prayer, conscience, honesty—and said ‘do the best you can with these, they will have to do.’ And mostly, against all odds, they do.”

Anne Lamott

1. The Bloggess (Best Written, Funniest), Jenny Lawson (thebloggess.com) 2. Moosh in Indy (Most Confessional), Casey Mullens (mooshinindy.com) 3. Design Mom (Best Design), Gabrielle Blair (www.designmom.com) 4. Dooce, (Most Controversial), Heather Armstrong (dooce.com) 5. Girls Gone Child, Rebecca Woolf (girlsgonechild.net) 6. Black and Married with Kids, Lamar and Ronnie Tyler (blackandmarriedwithkids.com) 7. Mom 101, Liz Gumbinner (www.mom-101.com) 8. Momastery, Glennon Doyle Melton (momastery.com/blog) 9. Motherlode, KJ Dell’Antonia (parenting.blogs.nytimes.com) 10. Edenland, Eden Riley (www.edenriley.com)

Mother’s Day: Canada’s THIRD LARGEST greeting card holiday— following Valentine’s Day & Christmas—with over nine million cards expected to be sold this year in Canada, according to Hallmark Canada.

Why You’re Never Failing as a Mother: You are in the trenches when you have a baby. To the untrained eye it seems pretty straightforward and easy—you feed them, you bathe them, you pick them up when they cry—but it’s more than that. It’s perpetual motion with a generous layer of guilt and self-doubt spread on top, and that takes its toll.

Feeling like you also need to keep on top of scrapbooking, weight loss, up-cycled onesies, handprints, crock pot meals, car seat recalls, sleeping patterns, poo consistency, pro-biotic supplements, swimming lessons, electromagnetic fields in your home and television exposure is like trying to knit on a rollercoaster—it’s f*cking hard.

From Why You’re Never Failing as a Mother byAmy Morrison on Huffington Post www.huffingtonpost.com.

Flickering bright lights; sound and stories called “movies.”

They still exist, right?

From Haiku Mama (because 17 syllables is all you have time to read) by Kari Anne Roy. Quirk Books, 2006.

www.IslandParent.ca

Kelli Etheridge Photographic, 250-619-6273 www.etheridgephotographic.com

Mom’s Salted Caramel Brownies 1 cup butter 2 cups sugar 1 tsp vanilla extract 1⁄2 tsp salt 1 tsp good quality sea salt

4 one-ounce squares of dark chocolate 4 eggs 1 cup all-purpose flour 1⁄4 cup caramel topping

1. Preheat oven to 350˚F and grease a 9”x13” baking pan.

2. In a 3-quart saucepan over very low heat, melt butter and chocolate, stirring the mixture constantly. Remove from heat, and stir the sugar into the chocolate. Allow the mixture to cool slightly.

3. Beat in the eggs one at a time, mixing well after each, then stir in the vanilla. Combine the flour and 1⁄2 tsp salt in a separate bowl, then stir into the chocolate mixture.

4. Spread the batter evenly into the prepared pan. Drizzle the caramel atop the batter, and use a knife to swirl over the surface. Sprinkle sea salt over the caramel.

5. Bake for 30 to 35 minutes. Brownies are done when a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Cool in pan on wire rack.

(From A Cup of Jo, joannagoddard.blogspot.ca)

May 2013 9

Community Connections for New Parents

F The “BEST” way to cloth diaper your child.

We supply everything you Need (except the baby!)

Serving Vancouver Island since 2008

We deliver from Victoria & area to Comox Valley

HaPPy islaNd diaPers are

pp

y i sl

an

d

Ha

• Affordable • Environmentally friendly • Form fitted • Adjustable plastic snaps • No rinsing or soaking

Ask about our GREAT referral program

www.happyislanddiapers.com 1-866-922-7377

or some new parents, it might be a yoga class, for others a play group or maybe a local café for a cup of tea. Wherever “it” is for you, that place where you find a connection to other new parents can be as important to your well-being as love is to your baby’s. Here are a few places where you can meet other new parents.

Recreation/Community Centres Most centres offer free or nominally priced programs for new parents. Parent & Tot Drop-In (Burnside Gorge Community Centre 250-388-5251, Pearkes Recreation Centre 250-475-5400, Saanich Neighbourhood Place 250-360-1148, Military Family Resource Centre 250-363-2640); Mother Goose (Burnside Gorge, Fernwood); Dad’s Drop-In (Saanich Neighbourhood Place) are just some of the programs listed in spring leisure guides.

Exercise Classes Whatever your preferred method of exercise, chances are you’ll be able to find a class that’s geared toward new parents.

From pre- and post-natal yoga classes (Helga Beer, 250-370-0464, Iyengar Yoga Centre, 250-386-9642, Mothering Touch Centre, 250-595-4905, Moksana Yoga, 250-3852105), to Parent & Tot swimming at your recreation centre, drop-in Yoga, Stretch & Dance with Babies and Toddlers at Mothering Touch (250-595-4905), baby-friendly boot camp at Life Force Systems (250-3806947), and Frontrunner’s Running Moms conditioning program for parents with children in strollers (250-382-8181), these classes will help you get in shape and meet other parents.

Libraries The Greater Victoria Public Library offers programs for babies and toddlers and their adults. Programs are free and drop-in.

At Baby Time (for babies 0-15 months and caregiver) you’ll learn songs, rhymes, and fingerplays to use with your baby. At Toddler Time (for toddlers 16-35 months and caregiver) you’ll hear stories, songs and rhymes, and see puppets. For children under 3 and their adults, try a Family Storytime.

For more info, visit www.gvpl.ca or phone 10

Island Parent Magazine

your local branch. For library programs in other Island communities, check the Vancouver Island Regional Library website at virl.bc.ca.

Parks/Playgrounds With flowers blooming and temperatures getting warmer, May is a beautiful month to be outside, so load up your baby or young child and stroll on down to the park. Try joining Saanich Park’s free Preschoolers in the Park program (www.saanich.ca/parkrec/ parks/parks/free.html) on Friday mornings from 10-11:30am for playground time, circle time, and a guided nature/urban walk in neighbourhood parks.

Or take part in the Nature Play Group (for ages 1-5) where kids can engage in free play in a natural setting—both at Saxe Point (at the pedestrian entrance near Fraser and Munro) every Tuesday from 9:30-11:30am and at Highrock Park (at the entrance near Cairn and Old Esquimalt Road) every Thursday, 9:30-11:30am. For information, phone 250-475-5408.

Neighbourhood Houses Call the Neighbourhood House in your area to find out about drop-in programs and other opportunities for you and your child.

Beacon Community Services (various locations) 250-656-0134, Blanshard Community Centre 250-388-7696, Burnside Gorge Community Centre 250-388-5251, Esquimalt Neighbourhood House 250-3852635, Fernwood Community Centre 250381-1552, James Bay Community Project 250-388-7844, Military Family Resource Centre 250-363-2640, Saanich Neighbourhood Place 250-360-1148, Sooke Family Resource Society 250-642-5152.

Most drop-in programs are free or cost a nominal fee.

Support for New Families The Mothering Touch Centre at 975 Fort Street offers Parent & Babies drop-in sessions 3 times a week: Tuesday afternoons 1-2:30pm for newborns-4 months, Wednesday afternoons 1-2:30pm for babies 4-9 months; Thursday afternoons 1-2:30pm for babies and toddlers 9 months and up.

There’s also a Pregnancy Happy Hour (and www.kidsinvictoria.com

a half!) for pregnant mothers only, on Friday afternoons from 5-6:30pm. $2. Phone 250595-4905 or visit www.motheringtouch.ca.

Native Friendship Centre

Where adventure and imagination thrive!

• Forest Adventure • Outdoor Cooking • Narnian Dramas • Mask Making

Online Connections Victoria’s active online communities offer a great way to connect with other parents, find out about what’s going on in your community, and discover local resources. At www.kidsinvictoria.com you can register to access the KIV community where you can join in or start discussions on any topic. For activities and events of interest to families throughout Vancouver Island, check out the Family Events on harbourliving.ca.

• Archery • Swimming • Unique Programming • And so much more…

Summer registration on now!

Girls & Boys, Ages 6–15 • August 4–10, 11–17

Support Circles Create your own (invite a few new parents and their babies over for coffee or tea and chit chat) or join a group that’s already formed. For example, Fernwood Community Centre’s Parent & Baby drop-in playgroup offers a relaxed setting where parents can nurture their babies (up to three years old) through parent discussion, music and storytelling. Mondays, 9:30-11:30am. Coffee, juice and snacks are provided. Suggested donation of $2. Phone 250-381-1552.

An independent, non-denominational camp

Parksville BC

Programs are designed to promote the health of newborns and mothers in the urban Aboriginal community. The Slaheena & Aboriginal Parenting Programs include a Monday storytime (10:30-11:30am), a Tuesday playgroup (10:30-noon), a Wednesday parent support group (10:30am-1pm), seasonal crafts, and outdoor activities.

Phone 250-384-3211 or visit www.vnfc.ca.

www.campnarnia.com Join us this summer for an amazing experience!

Emmanuel Preschool 2121 Cedar Hill Cross Road (by entrance to UVic)

Openings for 2013–2014 Classes!

Children learn through play in our all inclusive, non-denominational Christian preschool.

Great facility; outdoor play area and a gym for rainy day play!

Two teachers with ECE certification plus assistant teachers to help with special needs children.

A competent and caring teaching team!

Opportunities:

Mon / Wed / Fri morning class Tues / Thurs morning class 5 mornings a week

Phone 250-598-0573 preschool@emmanuelvictoria.ca www.emmanuelpreschool.ca

Go for a Stroll Meet up with a few new moms and/or dads at the stroller-friendly Gorge Waterway, a perfect place for a leisurely stroll with playgrounds along the way and gorgeous scenery. Or there’s the mostly flat gravel loop around Rithet’s Bog in Saanich. For a few hills, and a tougher slog for the stroller thanks to the wood chip trail, take the loop around Cedar Hill Golf Course where you’ll find beautiful views of the Olympic mountains and a duck pond full of well-fed though seemingly always hungry ducks. If you’re looking for a quiet and scenic paved route, try the Songhees, starting either at Westbay Marina or the Delta Ocean Point resort. If you’re too tired to push the stroller back to your starting point, climb aboard the harbour ferry and boat back instead.•

www.IslandParent.ca

Catch the Kye Bay Spirit • • • •

miles of safe sandy beaches warm and safe swimming may–oct. explore the reef and tidepools comfy seaside cottages

For an experience you’ll never forget!

KYE BAY GUEST LODGE & COTTAGES Comox, BC, Vancouver Island www.kyebay.com 1-866-658-6131

May 2013 11

Mary Martin Wiens

The Lines of a Story

T Summer Programs July 8 to 12 & Aug 19 to 23

Best of Broadway

4 to 6 year olds • 9am to 12pm

Broadway and Beyond

7 to 14 year olds • 9am to 3pm

Nurturing and developing young peoples potential through dance, drama and singing

Email: langford@stagecoachschools.ca

Call: 250 743 0858 (Mill Bay)

12 Island Parent Magazine

hroughout my twenties and thirties, I was able to gain and lose pounds with the best of them. But, I was always proud that the front part of my belly stayed flat and muscled…a nod to the thousands of sit ups I did as a gymnast when I was a girl. But, having babies, particularly the twins, changed my flat belly forever. Like someone who has lost a hundred pounds, the skin does not go back again. My stomach hangs low. I can gather my belly in my hands, moving and shaping it like the sweetbread dough I make with my mother at Christmas. And then there are the stretch marks covering the whole front of my midsection. They are a hundred rivulets of red rain streaming down a window, pooling at the sill of my C-section scar in half-inch wide scars that look, to me, like burns. When I blow dry my hair after a shower, I look at my body in the mirror, and the familiar internal conversation begins. First there is the still present feeling of surprise. That’s me? Then comes the uncontrollable feeling of disgust constricting my throat. But on its heels the thought: wait a minute, these scars are sacred, they represent one of the most significant stories within my story, something I don’t want to forget, and there, right there is evidence of my own rebirth into something more. But I hardly take a breath before my hands are moving to my stomach to stretch it out flat and make it look like a long-gone me. If I could just change this one part…

About six months ago, a moment of pure grace happened to me in the middle of one of these internal push-pulls. I was drying my hair and my three-year-old son, Ben, walked into the bathroom. He played with the lipsticks in the drawer, he asked about my eye make-up remover, and then he looked at me appraisingly and said, “Your belly is funny.”

It all began to rise in me: the initial feelings of body shame so deeply programmed in me by my culture, the thoughts I want to feel about the sacredness of my body, and a memory of playing in the leaves with Steve and the boys last fall. We were tickling and rolling in the leaves and one of the boys tickled me and said, “Daddy’s belly is hard and yours is squishy.” “Yes,” I said, “That is right.”

But, I had thought: I don’t think I want to play tickle again.

This time, my three-year-old son is standing in front of me, saying, “Your belly is

funny,” and the magic happens. I stood in a place where all the times of my life were present—past, future, and this boy standing in front of me now. Images and sensations of those I love flashed through my mind. I experienced the warmth of Steve’s broad back against mine in bed and the pleasure of recognizing his gait 200 hundred yards before his face comes into focus. I saw the scar under my father’s eye where the horse kicked him. I saw the reading glasses perched on my sister’s distinct elegant English nose as she holds her pen in her long straight fingers making bold careful shapes. And, I saw my own mother putting on make-up after a shower with a towel wrapped around her head while I played with her lipsticks.

The curve of her hips, the dough of her soft belly and the silken freckles and cream tone of her skin is beautiful beyond measure. And I understood something.

We journey from a seed in our mother’s womb until we are planted in the grave, with ever-changing bodies. Time scratches out its passage across my looks and the looks of all those I love. All our lives, our bodies manifest evidence of an existence marked by gains and losses. We gain and lose pounds, muscle, bruises, teeth, and hair. We lose elasticity and gain wrinkles. We gain scars.

Our bodies process and carry our experiences, not without complaint, but with an unfailing perseverance that is worthy of both gratitude and honour. And one of the very great privileges of this life is to cherish the bodies of those I love through all their gains and losses for as long as I get to have them.

We do not get to have those we love forever.

In that final losing, every turn of the head and expression of the face becomes poignantly precious. So, may I have eyes to see them now.

My sister, who hates finding hair in her sink, in her food, on her body to an almost phobic degree, told me a story from the time she walked her dear friend through the months of a fast moving terminal cancer.

When the time came for her friend to get her last haircut, my sister was there. She stood close, touching her friend’s shoulders and head, catching strands of falling hair in her hands, letting it lay all over her clothes.

Goodbye beautiful hair that I have loved on the head of my dear friend, she thought. I will not miss this moment.

www.kidsinvictoria.com

So, in the moment when Ben stood in front of me and the magic happened, I spoke not what I should, not what I wished to believe, but what I deeply felt for once to be true. “Is my belly kind of squishy? Kind of soft?” I ask. “Yes!” he says. “Do you see these red roads on my belly? Are you curious about those?” I ask. “Yes!” he says. “Do you want to know what those feel like?” I ask. “Yes!” he says. Then I take his little finger and trace it along one of my stretch marks and ask, “Do you know what these are?” “No,” he says. “These are the lines of a story. Do you know what the story is about?” “What?” he asks. “These lines tell the story of Isaac and Ben and Elijah. They tell about how you grew inside me and how I stretched to make room for you because I was so glad you would be my boy. Aren’t they beautiful?” “Yes!” he answers.

The healing in this story is not that I have wholly accepted my body or that I will never again attempt to change it. It is that now when rejection rises in me against my body—how it looks, how it feels—I have a fuller answer. I can call up the sounds, smells, movements, scars, wrinkles, and dimples of my dear ones and look at myself through the lens of that incomparable beauty. This gives me access to a programming deeper than my culture that reminds me that my being here in this world in a body matters. The touch of my hand on a shoulder, my hug, the soothing sound of my voice, and the warmth in my eyes are irreplaceable to those who carry me in their hearts. Our physical presence here matters, no matter its shape.

And so, sweet Ben, my desire for you goes far beyond that which I have caught myself striving for in the looking glass. Here it is: May you have the great gift of intimately knowing and loving the body of another through all the changes of life, and having your body known and loved from head to toe, in return. And someday, when you stand in front of the mirror with your chosen one, and she is trying to lift her breasts back into place…or you are looking in the mirror and trying to flatten your own belly into a younger shape…remember what I am teaching you now. It is the stories and the cherishing that make us beautiful. May you catch each falling moment in your hands and kiss it as it goes.

Mary Martin Wiens’ essay, “These Are the Lines of a Story,” reprinted with permission, originally appeared on Steve Wiens’ blog, The Actual Pastor at www.stevewiens.com.

www.IslandParent.ca

ALL FUN KARTS • CAGES • CLUBS • CAMPING at Western Speedway

s a g n i h t h c u s There’s no ! ! n u f h c u m too

GO KARTS BATTING CAGES MINI GOLF RV PARK Open from 12-5pm • Weekends and Holidays from April-June & Sept 7 days/week July & August from 11-6pm (weather permitting)

2207 Millstream Road, Victoria BC 250.474.1961 allfun.bc.ca May 2013 13

Books for the Maternally Inclined Thanks to our intrepid band of reviewer mamas—Shirley Broback, Krista Henry, Jenn Roberts-Hall Lori-Ann Schuck, Lori Webber—who sought a quiet couple of minutes/ hours here and there to tirelessly, uh, okay, gleefully read, and sometimes re-read, the following assortment of motherhood books.

You’re Ruining My Life!: Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting

by Jennifer Kolari In You’re Ruining My Life! (Penguin Group Canada, 2012) Jennifer Kolari presents a formula for communicating successfully with our teens, demonstrating her many years of experience counselling teens and families. With warmth, humour and understanding, she offers support to parents who are willing to change our own behaviour and learn to give our teens the unconditional love we so easily gave them as infants. Through her uncomplicated descriptions of brain science, we learn that teens are navigating with an underdeveloped frontal lobe, making them prone to impulsive, emotionally charged reactions. They need us to empathize with them, bathing their brains in oxytocin (the bonding hormone we were flooded with when we gave birth); changing their brain chemistry so we can access the rational part.

From the basis of attachment parenting, and using case studies from her own therapy practice, Kolari instructs us to follow three steps: First, CALM (Connect, Affect, Listen, Mirror).

Second, present the problem as our adult brain sees it. And finally, together find a solution.

Kolari’s powerful advice is explained in a suitable format for a busy parent’s schedule: conversational sections that can be read in short bursts. If your children are nearing their teens, in crisis or not, this book could be a game changer for your family. LAS

Parenting: Illustrated With Crappy Pictures by Amber Dusick One word: Hysterical!

Amber Dusick has written a book for real parents. She doesn’t attempt to make parenthood glamourous or try to teach us how to do it “right.” She understands sleepless nights, traveling with kids, and poopy diapers. She understand picky eaters, sick children (sick husbands!) and kids who yell, “Penis!” at the pizza man.

She understands and she doesn’t judge.

Amber has made mistakes and shares them

14

Island Parent Magazine

with us. Originally a mommy blog, Parenting: Illustrated With Crappy Pictures does read similar to a blog post with simple stories and crappy pictures, but I found that to be part of the appeal. Busy parents are, well, busy, and this book is a fast read.

My husband read the book and laughed constantly. My mother-in-law came for a visit and giggled through a few chapters.

Who do I recommend this to? Any parent who is having a bad day and wants to know they aren’t alone. Any parent who just needs a break, a time out with a good book.

And any parent who just needs a good laugh because, honestly, sometimes parenting just isn’t funny. JRH

Mind Blowing Sex: A Woman’s Guide

by Diana Cage The popularity of the 50 Shades book series indicates that many women either lust for a little more adventure in life—or at least a little more adventurous reading. The beginning of Mind Blowing Sex: A Woman’s Guide (Seal Press, 2012) discusses the history and myths about female sexuality, body image, confidence and communication with one’s partner. You’ll find tips for spicing things up in a variety of ways for couples (and all by yourself, if you know what I mean). The author touches on the troubles and solutions for getting in the mood and what to do about dry spells in your relationship. For example, the book lays out “five kisses to try.”

While the book is geared to women, it doesn’t specifically speak to moms. Moms can have certain specific areas of concern, especially in the early years, that I would have liked to have seen addressed. But there are plenty of ideas and information to make the book a good read and a fun topic for conversation.

Sexual health survey results show that this aspect of our relationships declines after having kids. But we also know that keeping the passion alive is part of a happy, healthy relationship. Reading this book together with your partner and a glass of wine might be a fun way to re-ignite that spark. SB

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Good Food to Go—Healthy Lunches Your Kids Will Love by Brenda Bradshaw and

French Twist: An American Mom’s Experiment in Parisian Parenting

by Catherine Crawford Catherine Crawford, an American mom in Brooklyn, NY, noticed that her French friends had children that were better behaved than her own two girls. So she asked French mothers (and some fathers) what she was doing wrong and what they were doing right. The result is a mostly clever but rambling book about differing parenting styles: American vs. French. The lessons she learned from her French compatriots were grounded in basic common sense. She was taught that it is damaging to hover over your children á la helicopter parents. Was her “experiment” a success? Yes, if you think having a 21⁄2 hour dinner at a restaurant with well-behaved children is the culmination of good French parenting. French parents simply want to educate their children and teach them appropriate manners. In Crawford’s endless examples of American parenting, the parents and children come off as whiny and spoiled. As a parenting “how to,” I think this book fails, but Crawford does shine a light on how childcentric our North American culture is. This would be a fantastic book club selection, sure to stimulate debate. LW

www.IslandParent.ca

STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE ™ and related trademarks © 2013 Those Characters From Cleveland, Inc. American Greetings with rose logo is a trademark of AGC, LLC.

Cheryl Mutch, M.D. In September, my kid’s lunches were exciting and edible. By May, well, not so much. I needed some ideas to last me until the end of the school year!

Good Food to Go (Random House Canada, 2011) won me over immediately. Any cookbook that acknowledges food allergies and offers substitutions is worthy of praise from those of us who have nut- or other foodallergic kids. No nut butters in this book.

Instead, sunflower seed butter (a favourite in our house) is suggested in a number of recipes.

Thank you, authors!

With an eco-friendly and health focus, the book covers packed school lunches, baked goods, after-school snacks, and meal plans.

The ideas fit with how we like to eat in our house: healthily but without deprivation. I immersed myself in the sandwich chapter, finding inspiration to ditch the bread for tortillas, flat breads and pitas. I even tucked some organic greens in my kindergartner’s cheese and turkey roll up.

The best advice this book offers is to talk to your child about why their lunch isn’t being eaten. I’m off to buy the ingredients for the “best homemade granola bars ever.” KH

Featuring special guest Huckleberry Pie! NANAIMO DUNCAN VICTORIA

Wednesday, June 5 The Port Theatre Sunday, June 9 Cowichan Theatre Monday, June 10 Royal Theatre ON SALE NOW! For tickets visit www.StrawberryShortcakeOnTour.com Sponsor

May 2013 15

Braving

Colleen Adrian Janine Fernandes-Hayden

Mother-Daughter Relationships M

y mother always said to me, “The way you treat your mother is the way your daughters will treat you.” I never gave her refrain much thought until now.

I hope it is not completely true. My mother and I would both agree that we have not had the best of relationships. I have often insisted this is because we are so very different, but deep down I wonder if we are more similar than I’d like to believe. This is why my mother’s words worry me. And with three daughters of my own, my concern is understandable.

While the drama, both real and potential, fills the space of my own microcosm, I take some comfort in the fact that my mother-daughter woes are not unique, after all. Why would Pixar take a chance with its movie “Brave” if it felt that the subject matter did not hold universal appeal? I surveyed my female friends—something I often do to gain insight and perspective on family and parenting—and found I am not alone. No topic within my circle has ever generated so much emotional response.

I’m not sure what the key is to a happy mother-daughter relationship. I sometimes think that perhaps, had I been a more compliant daughter or, had my mother been more independent in her own identity, life would have been easier for the two of us. But instead, my mother and I fall into the strong-willed daughter vs. overmothering mother category of relationship. I can already see my daughters following in my footsteps.

So now, as the mother, how do I find a balance between the two extremes of isolation and enmeshment?

16 Island Parent Magazine

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Hats Off to Wholeness. I love hats. I have a bin-full, ranging in colour and style, some sophisticated and conservative, some youthful, and others just plain fun. These days, however, there never seem to be enough occasions to wear them all. I tend to default to my comfortable newsboy cap, day in and day out. It is a metaphor that sometimes describes my life. Being a mother can be all consuming and at times I lumber on, hiding under my “Mama” hat while the other hats that I wear—wife, friend, learner, dreamer—become musty from lack of use.

I have come to realize that while I love my children and family dearly, and while they make up the best and biggest part of my life, they are not my whole world.

These days, I try to carve out space that allows me to be all that I am and/or to just be myself. I acknowledge that I am lucky to be able to do so. I take the time to nurture my friendships. I prioritize the pursuit of my own interests and fitness. Sometimes, I feel guilty and wonder if I’m being selfish, but I know that if I lose the fullness of my identity, I cannot be of service to my family, nor can I be the best of role models. I suspect that it is a mind set quite different than that of my mother’s generation. But looking ahead, when my family is grown, I want to continue to feel purposeful in life as a person and not just as a mother. I want to have close friends who are there with me as I navigate my ever-evolving emotional world. I don’t want to depend solely on my family for my physical and mental needs.

Above all, I don’t want to have regrets and feel that I need to live my life vicariously through my daughters.

I wonder how my mother’s and my relationship would have looked had she been given, or allowed herself, the opportunity to follow her own passions. Of course it’s never too late, but as I have found with my hat collection, the longer they sit in the box, the more I lack the confidence to show them off.

Cutting the Cord. My 18-month-old daughter is overcoming her separation anxiety. It has been a struggle—for me as I grapple between letting go of my last baby while reclaiming some independence, and for her as she learns to live her own life and trust a world that is bigger than just me. It is a scenario not unlike that between my mother and I. In both cases, separation despite the anxiety, has to occur in order for growth.

Struggling to achieve a healthy sense of detachment with my mother and developwww.IslandParent.ca

Time to Get Spoiled!

Diaper bag sale starts May 1st!

Check out our Mother’s Day Weekend specials!

www.BelliesInBloomMaternity.com Royal Oak Shopping Centre 250 479 0803

 







    

     

 

  









 

 

May 2013 17

GULF ISLANDS FILM & TELEVISION SCHOOL

Summer Media Exploration Junior & Youth Camps* Junior age 11–14, Youth age 14–18 One-week Media Intensive Camps* no experience necessary Two-week Directors Camps* prerequisite required Choose from: Dramatic Video Production, Visual Effects & Animation, Acting on Camera, Game Design, YouTube Production, and more…

Island Parent 2013 Contest!

Enter at ent www.giftsfilms.com/islandpar for a chance to

Win Free Tuition

($560 value)* + 5 runner up prizes!

Winners announced June 1st.

Register at www.GIFTSfilms.com gifts@giftsfilms.com 1.800.813.9993

S U M M E R DAY CA M P S OPEN TO EVERYONE!

Jun 24 – Aug 29 7:30am – 6:00pm

Daily field trips, soccer, scavenger hunts, theme days and much more—every day is a new adventure!

Supervised by qualified, caring, energetic staff in a licensed facility.

Contact us by email or phone to find out more.

Suitable for ages 5 – 10

Christ Church Cathedral School

912 Vancouver Street | 250-383-5125 luxmundi@cathedralschool.ca | www.cathedralschool.ca

18 Island Parent Magazine

ing intimate independence require much mindfulness on my part. My recipe is guilt free no-strings-attached interactions defined by clear boundaries and seasoned with selfdiscipline, patience and tolerance. All of this topped with the wisdom and discernment as to how emotionally invested I need to become. The proportions and techniques are still hit-and-miss but it is definitely easier on the heartburn and just the right amount of calories. I hope one day my daughters and I can savour a similar experience.

Breaking the Vow. “When I grow up and have babies, I’m going to let them have as much sugar as they want!” swears my eldest daughter. Ah yes, the “vow,” a most powerful weapon and I am sure that this one is just the first of many to come. I think back to all of the impetuous vows I made in retaliation against my mother’s control. Most were moot and following through on them would not have been in the best interests of my own children, or would have left me eating a hefty serving of humble pie. I realize that being mindful of my personal triggers and wounds is the best way to navigate the waters with my daughters, and to perhaps either break unhealthy patterns or avoid the trap of overcompensation. Before I examine the ways that I mother my daughters, I need to ask myself the question: Am I mothering my inner child the way I would like to mother my own children? Much of the work starts from the inside out with me looking at myself with honesty and respect.

Un-doubling the Standard. Every so often, I have to call myself on the double standards that I hold when it comes to my mother. On the one hand, I expect her to respect me as an independent and responsible individual, yet I am content to be mothered when it’s convenient for me. It must be confusing for her. It’s what we often do with family, unconsciously taking for granted and taking advantage in ways that we would never do with others. More so with mothers—we can burden them with unrealistic expectations and judgments of what they can and should do physically and emotionally. Perhaps it’s an inevitable by-product of the superwoman syndrome they tend to fall victim to.

I am trying not to assume that when my mother visits, she will do laundry and help with the cooking and cleaning, or that when I go home to Calgary she’ll take care of the kids while I fly off to the gym or to visit with old friends. Reading this, she would likely say, “Don’t be ridiculous, that’s just what I am meant to do.” But I believe that’s wrong. Again it comes down to boundarwww.kidsinvictoria.com

ies, and these days I remind myself to ask and never assume. It is part of the process of seeing her as a person, and not just my mother—a person who, like anyone else, merits courtesy, consideration and gratitude.

Mending the Bond. For my mother’s seventieth birthday, I took her to Vancouver for a cake decorating conference. I knew it was something we’d both enjoy doing together. It was a decision I made after a visit home that was particularly challenging.

I realized that we needed to try something new as simply two people learning together and enjoying a common interest. It was a gift for both of us, a gift of a renewed and re-evolved relationship.

On the first night, we sat across from each other in a beautiful dimly lit restaurant with no children for us to hide behind. Face-toface candlelight dinners seem to evoke an inescapable intimacy. The initial awkward silence and uneasiness made me realize that this was a new experience for my mother and me. Eventually she began to speak, telling the story of her joys, trials and regrets as a mother. Her eyes filled with tears and as I listened, I realized that we were in fact very different from one another—different generations, different cultural beliefs, different knowledge bases, different pressures and different personal struggles. For the first time, I tried to put myself in her place and understand what it must have been like to be a working mother, making ends meet in a new country with no family support. At the same time, we couldn’t be more alike. We were both mothers suffering from the same insecurities, self-doubt, imperfections, guilt and feelings of “not-enoughness.” I suddenly felt so very sad for my mother but more so for me for not having seen her as just human, fumbling about, tending her own wounds, learning her life lessons along the way and trying to do the very best that she could.

And so, the process of mending my relationship with my mother continues with a new stitch, sewn with empathy, humility and most importantly, forgiveness. It’s not perfect and I am sure there will still be knots and tangles along the way. But I like that the seams will be visible, showing where one segment of our relationship has ended and hopefully where a new one is beginning.

Janine Fernandes-Hayden is an educator, trained Virtues Project facilitator, and Salt Spring Island mum of four children. She hosts a parent and kids radio show called “The Beanstalk” on Salt Spring Island airwaves at CFSI 107.9 FM. www.IslandParent.ca

Children love the outdoors! Children love to play!

Why not let them blow off some steam at one of our camps?

Our highly trained and experienced camp leaders want to make your child’s camp experience a memorable one.

All of our camps are eligible for a bursary and are priced with families in mind.

We have several camps located in various places throughout Victoria and on Vancouver Island.

We have camps for every age group from elementary, middle school and even high-school aged camps.

We have day camps that last all week long and overnight camps in the great outdoors. Camp is for a week but the impact lasts a lifetime.

Find out more specifically about our camps online at

antikipper.com

What does YOUR adventure look like?

Registration now open for:

SUMMER CAMPS At City Centre Park for ages 5-15!

DATES AVAILABLE: July 1-5 July 8-12 July 15-19 July 22-26 July 29-Aug 2 ACTIVITIES WILL INCLUDE: SKATING/ROLLER BLADING | WATER PARK | FIELD SPORTS Aug 6-9 LAKE ACTIVITIES | POND FISHING | KAYAKING | CRAFTS Aug 12-16 NATURE HIKING | MINI PUTT | BALLADIUM | SPORTBALL Aug 19-23 SCIENCE EXPERIMENTS | MUSIC | DRAMA | ART | THEMES COOPERATIVE GAMES | PLAYZONE | GYMNASTICS Aug 26-30

$165/ WEEK TWO OR MORE WEEKS:

$155/ WEEK

Regular Camp Hours: 9AM - 3PM Before & After Care at 7:30AM until 5PM

www.citycentrepark.ca | 250.391.1738 May 2013 19

Products & Services for New Parents To help you as you journey through the unique experience of being a new parent, check out the following listings and the corresponding ads in this issue.

German Classes FOR AGES 3 AND UP

www.victoriagermanschool.org 250-886-1420 info@victoriagermanschool.org

Bellies In Bloom Maternity. Visit us for the hottest products for mom and babe.

You’ll find a great selection of clothing and accessories for maternity, nursing, and baby, many exclusive to Bellies in Bloom. We are famous for our nursing bras. We also have fun gifts and newborn essentials, from the most practical to the fun and unique. Visit our website to find out more about us and preview the newest styles. Shop from home with great deals and cheap shipping. www.

BelliesInBloomMaternity.com.

The Burnside Gorge Community Association offers Parent & Tot drop-in programs throughout the week that are free or lowcost. Drop-ins allow parents to meet other

parents while their kids play, learn, and meet other kids. Other Family Centre programs include: Mother Goose, Kindergym, Toddler Art, and a Community Family Dinner.

For program days, times and cost, visit our website at www.burnsidegorge.ca or call 250-388-5251.

Choices Adoption & Counselling Services is a licensed non-profit, non-sectarian adoption agency that has been involved in adoptions and family counselling since 1989. We offer a range of services to birth and adoptive parents throughout British Columbia and can assist adoptive families from several other provinces with intercountry adoptions. Whether you wish to

Celebrating the growing family premier photography

20  Island Parent Magazine

september 28 & 29, 2013 pearkes rec centre - 3100 Tillicum rd victoria

www.kidsinvictoria.com

adopt a child born in B.C. or a child from another country, our experienced professionals will help you through the process. www.choicesadoption.ca.

Glowing Touch Doula. Melissa Harris provides non-clinical care for pregnant women and their partners. With emotional and physical support, a doula will take the pregnancy, labour, birth, and the postpartum period from stressful to wonderful. Whether you want a homebirth or hospital birth, natural or epidural, Melissa can support you by providing constant care and helping you meet your baby. Visit www.glowingtouch. ca to see more about how a doula can make your birthing team stronger.

Happy Island Diaper Service is the best choice for cloth diapering for your baby.

Our modern diapers and products make using our service easy and cost effective.

Once a week, our pink van will come and pick up the soiled diapers and leave you fresh clean ones. There is no rinsing or soaking required, and we will supply you with everything you need right at your doorstep.

This is a great choice for your baby and for the environment. 1-866-922-7377. www. happyislanddiapers.com. www.facebook. com/happyislanddiapers.

Helping Hands Doula. A doula (pronounced doola) understands the physiological and emotional stages of childbirth. A doula will accompany a woman and her partner/family to the hospital or her home and offer continuous support throughout her entire labor and birth experience. The doula can offer a myriad of support from helping mom with position changes, using a variety of comfort measures, helping the family obtain information so that they can make informed decisions, and supporting their birth plans. Research shows that by a having a doula attend a birth, labours tend to be shorter, the need for pain medication decreases, and more women experience a satisfying and positive birth experience. Jay Duncan is a DONA trained Birth and Postpartum Doula as well as a Lamaze Certified Childbirth Educator with over 10 years of experience. Please feel free to call or email her if you need any more information. www. helpinghandsvictoriadoula.blogspot.ca.

Find on Facebook Page by typing: Helping Hands Doula Services.

Hip Baby offers modern, organic and sustainable products for your newborn to four-year-old. Thoughtful toys, organic www.IslandParent.ca

clothing, natural meal-time and bath-time products and much more. Find a great selection of Canadian crafted products and many cloth diaper brands. We offer free monthly workshops on cloth diapering to show you how to choose your diaper system, put them on and care for them. Come with an open mind, and you’ll leave informed. www.hipbaby.com.

Investors Group. RESPs are a good vehicle for education planning. However, there are other options, for the same or similar costs of RESPs, that are more flexible, less restrictive and have more significant benefits. Give me a call for a free review of your financial plan and/or a no-obligation, no-pressure presentation of options about which you should be informed. Michael A. Hemmings: 250-388-4234, ext. 507 or cell: 250-818-1119 or michael.hemmings@ investorsgroup.com. Options, choices, planning for the future!

Montessori education understands that each child has a natural desire and ability to learn. Island Montessori staff members are committed to providing a rich, safe, developmentally appropriate, caring environment that establishes rapport with every child. Our child-centred program of individual and group activities promotes a sense of well-being, confidence and independence which fosters growth in all areas of development. We have children from a variety of economic, ethnic and religious backgrounds with a whole range of abilities and special needs. Our beautiful rural location is at 5575 West Saanich Road. For more information, call 250-592-4411 or visit www.islandmontessori.com.

Since 1944, Island Farms has been proudly producing quality dairy products made entirely from fresh B.C. milk. From our first horse-and-buggy stocked with milk bottles, to today’s wide range of wholesome products, we’ve built a reputation for good things from good people close by. We also play an active role in the communities we serve, sponsoring hundreds of family events and charities. Because at the end of the day, we’ve all got a family to come home to. www.islandfarms.com.

JamTots. We specialize in cloth diapers and many other unique items for babies and children. Check out our large selection of puzzles and crafts and Melissa and Doug toys. We carry a variety of shoes, swaddles,

Victoria & Vancouver Island 1-866-518-7287 Nanaimo 250-756-9794 Or online at: www.welcomewagon.ca

Get prepared diapers. sleepers. coffee. soothers. baby care. cupcakes. sleep advice. bottles… more coffee.

for baby

SHOP & SAVE LOCALLY with The Savvy Squirrel Coupon Book!

SPRING 2013 AVAILABLE NOW $100s in savings for only $10

Publication

Island Parent Magazine

Insertion Date

May 2013

Size

2.125 x 4.75

Colour

BW

May 2013 21

sleep sacks, BOB and Britax strollers, and Britax Carseats. For mom, we have everything for nursing and a large selection of diaper bags and baby carriers. Gift registry and gift cards available. Visit our website as most of our products are available online with fast shipping on the Island. 2945 Jacklin Road (Westshore Town Centre), Victoria.

250-478-1737. www.jamtots.com.

Jody Watson is a Registered Clinical Counsellor who specializes in working with new parents, families and couples. Individual counselling, couples counselling, workshops and support groups are some of the services offered. Areas of practice include: supporting parents to be and new parents, prenatal and postpartum depression, parenting issues, couples and relationship issues and infertility. Jody offers a variety of evidence based supports to meet your needs. For more information about services or upcoming workshops visit www.jodywatson.ca Kinderbeez carries a huge selection of high-quality, name brand baby/children’s and maternity items including toys, books, shoes, clothing, furniture, strollers and more. New items include Melissa and Doug toys, BOB strollers and accry’s, Britax

Car seats, Sophie, TUFFO and more. We have a friendly, knowledgeable staff who will always greet you and your children with a smile! No appointment necessary for consignment or pay outs. 110-2763 Beverly Street, Duncan. 250-748-2345, kinderbeez@shaw.ca.

In a Kindermusik Village class, we take those special bonding moments between you and your baby and add in a unique blend of musical learning activities that stimulate and engage all of the senses. The educator will teach you how to encourage your baby’s learning through vocal play, object exploration, instruments, and creative movement. Babies under their six-month birthday get free tuition! Enroll today. Phone 250-667-8794.

Maxine Fisher M. Ed., MTA, RCC. Pregnancy and childbirth are stressful whether it is your first child or your fourth. There are ways to reduce your stress, and studies show that when you are more relaxed your baby experiences this as well. Counselling and music therapy can assist parents in stress reduction, and studies show babies perceive sounds and music in the womb. For more information and to set up an appointment,

please call Maxine Fisher at Victoria Family Counselling. 250-686-7582, victoriafamilycounselling.com.

Mothering Touch Centre is the comprehensive resource centre for new and expectant parents. We offer support through every stage of pregnancy and early parenthood: childbirth preparation, pre-and post-natal yoga, breastfeeding support, parenting classes, parent-and-baby groups, baby massage, and baby sign language. Our friendly staff inform and support parents and grandparents as they select cloth diapers, nursing bras, breastpumps and breastfeeding accessories and much more. Drop in for a chat, nurse your baby in our lounge, and experience the warmth of the Mothering Touch. 975 Fort Street. 250-595-4905. www.motheringtouch.ca.

Planet Kids Comox is a child-centered store, offering a great play area, a washroom with a proper change table, and even extra diapering supplies if needed. We carry the latest in children’s clothing sizes—preemie to 10 years—and we are a full toy store with a little of everything for your newborn. Planet Kids Comox has a great consignment section, carrying maternity, and newborn to size

Maxine Fisher M.Ed., RCC, MTA

Counselling & Music Therapy for Children, Families & Adults

Over 18 Years Experience Stress & Trauma (Acting Out) • Parenting • Family Transitions Physical & Learning Disabilities • Relationships • Individuals M.Ed. Developmental Psychology (UVic) | Registered Clinical Counsellor | Accredited Music Therapist

Call 250-686-7582 maxinefisher@shaw.ca victoriamusictherapy.com

Looking to Buy or Sell a Home?

Visit my Parent to Parent webpage at www.BriarHillGroup.com Let me find you the home that best suits your family!

As a mother with two small children, I understand your family housing needs

Give me a call at 250-744-0775

Jane Johnston,* M.Ed. *Personal Real Estate Corporation

22 Island Parent Magazine

www.kidsinvictoria.com

16 clothing, shoes, toys, and baby/children’s equipment. We have been lucky to serve our community for over 25 years. Please come and visit the next time you are in Comox, or checkout our active Facebook page at www.facebook.com/PlanetKidsToys.

Pumpkin Pie Kids Wear in Nanaimo has a great selection of quality shoes (baby to size 5 youth), clothes (preemie-8 years), toys and baby gear. They are also a fitting shoe store featuring brands: Stride Rite, Geox, Keen, Hatley, Kamik and Saucony.

Whether it’s shoes, baby carriers, rain gear or organic layette, let Pumpkin Pie’s friendly, knowledgeable staff help you find the best product for your needs. 411A Fitzwilliam Street, Nanaimo. 250-754-3933. www. pumpkinpiekids.com.

Services:

Counselling, Groups, Workshops and Art Therapy for individuals, couples and children.

Workshops and counseling in:

• The Bringing Baby Home Program for couples. This is for expectant parents and parents with babies to help prepare you for life with your baby and discover how to be the best parenting team possible • The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work • Parents of Multiples • Preterm and Postpartum Depression and Anxiety • Infertility and Reproductive Loss • Adjusting to parenthood/parenting issues • Depression and Anxiety For more information on the workshops and services available, please see my website

www.jodywatson.ca 250.418.0550

#420–1105 Pandora Ave, Victoria

Saanich Recreation classes for mom and babe allow parents and newborns to learn more about one another, establishing trust and routine. Once baby can walk, indoor and outdoor programs allow children to explore safely while the caregiver oversees their play. Encouraging independence comes with drop-off programs, including full-year preschools. All programs promote learning through play, and readiness for kindergarten via storytelling, dramatic play, circle time, art, music and physical skills. www. saanichrec.ca.

The Savvy Squirrel Coupon Book is your family-focused Go-To-Guide for shopping locally. Created by two local moms for families and caregivers living in Greater Victoria, including Sidney and Langford.

Find coupons for wonderful local businesses including baby and maternity stores, diapering, clothing, health and wellness, groceries, cafés and more. Pick up your copy of the new edition in stores now. $100’s in savings for only $10! Sign up for our e-newsletter at www.SquirrelCouponBook.com.

Scallywags Children’s Boutique is your local destination for all your new parent goodies. Whether it is an organic onesie or kimono, a beautiful first dress, natural rubber soothers or stylish diaper bags, baby carriers or other accessories, we carry the best selection in town. We also have a great baby gift registry program. So stop by one of our two convenient locations, downtown at the Bay Centre or Broadmead Village, and our knowledgeable staff will help you make the best selection for your needs. www. scallywags-island.ca. www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013 23

Sleep Sense Victoria believes that healthy sleep habits make for healthy happy children. I work together, either through private consultations or seminars, with parents to customize a sleep plan that fits for parents as well as meets the sleep needs of their child.

Let’s get your child sleeping well through the night and taking adequate naps during the day! Please contact Sukkie Sandhu at 250-857-1408 or email sukkie.sandhu@ sleepsense.net.

Useful Gifts for New Parents When a baby is born, parents usually receive a truck load of gifts: clothes, toys, cute blankets, picture frames, etc. But is any of it actually useful? For people looking to get thoughtful gifts for new families (or families adding siblings), think about the following gift ideas: Food: You can make food and bring it over so that it can either be eaten that day or frozen. Also, if you are not a chef type, there are places you can buy pre-assembled food and have it delivered to the family.

Cleaning: Offer to clean, fold laundry, take out garbage, or do the dishes when you are over. Or better yet, give a gift certificate of a reputable cleaner. They can choose when to use the service, and then you aren’t stuck doing the chore you won’t even do at your own house!

Find house cleaners in the KIV resource section or ask friends for referrals.

Sleep: Offer to take the child for a walk, or hold the baby while mom gets some sleep. If mom doesn’t need sleep because her baby sleeps 12 hours straight (doubtful…), offer to hold the baby while she has a shower, or goes for a walk around the block. If you can’t help, nanny services and postpartum doulas will offer these types of services.

For more useful gift ideas, visit the Kids in Victoria website at www. kidsinvictoria.com and click on the Blog link.

24 Island Parent Magazine

Spina Bifida. Something so small can make such a big difference. Folic acid reduces the risk of birth defects such as spina bifida. It is found in some foods but for most women, eating fortified food is not enough. To reach the recommended daily level you will need a vitamin supplement and it should be taken at least three months before pregnancy. Help protect your baby before it is born by getting enough folic acid daily. www.sbhabc.org.

Parents, have you heard that Thrifty Foods has a virtual store? We know you don’t always have time to get to the grocery store, so we’re ready to help you. You make the selections and your shopper chooses the best quality products and packages your groceries just like you would so they get to you in excellent condition. The convenience of Thrifty Foods Online Shopping is that you can shop any time of the day that suits you or your baby. Upon delivery of your groceries, our driver will accept payment at your door using a wireless terminal (VISA, MasterCard, Amex, “Smile Card” or Debit).

Visit thriftyfoodsonline.com and let us do the shopping for you.

Whether it’s diapers or decor, TJ’s The Kiddies Store is the place to go for all your baby needs. Welcoming your new baby into the world is a wonderful and challenging experience; so many decisions and so little time. Our friendly and knowledgeable staff is ready to help make your decisions as stress-free as possible. Our selection varies from furniture sets to safety items and everything in between. TJ’s is also a great place for gifts—with a baby registry and many wonderful gift ideas, you will be able to find the right thing to make any new parent happy. We’re easy to find at 3045-c Douglas Street (enter off Larch Street)… we’re under Sleep Country. 250-386-2229.

Mark your calendar for September 28 & 29, 2013. The 7th annual Vancouver Island Baby Fair is happening at Pearkes Rec Centre. We’ll have an arena of exhibitors, a full lineup of informative talks on the main stage, great shopping and resources, fantastic prizes, our popular photo contest, baby races and more for families ranging from pregnancy through preschool.

Exhibitor registration is on now. Visit VancouverIslandBabyFair.com for details or call 250-686-5693.

Victoria Midwives. Midwives care for women throughout pregnancy, birth and for six weeks postpartum. Midwives offer personalized care and provide education and counselling that address the physical, emotional, and cultural needs of women and their families. Midwives offer a choice of birthplace either in hospital, or at home.

Midwives provide breastfeeding support, ensure the mother is recovering from the birth, and monitor the baby’s growth. Midwifery care is covered by your care card. See our ad on page 5. midwivesinvictoria.ca.

The Vitamin Shop. New and expecting moms need to know that diet is most important. Unfortunately, food is not what it used to be, therefore it is also important to take a good multiple supplement along with other nutrients to assure that both baby and mom receive the right nourishment along the way. Find the most comprehensive selection of everything you need for your pre- and post-natal “good health” at the Vitamin Shop, 1212 Broad Street. Phone 250-386-1212.

Welcome Wagon’s New Parent Market reaches new mothers with greetings and congratulations personally presented at home after the birth of their babies. A package of pertinent information on civic and community services is presented, followed by a directory of our sponsors and token gifts from participating businesses and, where appropriate, printed invitations for the family to redeem at their place of business. We also do Baby Showers for expectant moms. There we provide civic and educational information. It is given to mom before baby is born. For more information please visit www.welcomewagon.ca or call 1-866-518-7287.

West Shore Parks & Recreation offers a wide range of programs for young families and expectant parents. Our Toddler Social program is the perfect informal drop-in for you and your little one to explore music, activities and more. There are stroller fitness classes and pre-natal yoga, but if you are just looking to sneak in a workout, we offer child minding Monday-Friday 9am-12:30pm. For information, visit westshorerecreation.ca or call 250-478-8383.

Find us on Facebook at www.facebook. com/westshorerecreation.•

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Up-Island Business Directory Nanaimo’s Biggest Indoor Playground & Cafe Safe Toddlers Play Area Giant Play Structure with slides Cafe for Parents Snacks for Kids

Call today to book your party! #400-2980 Island Highway North Nanaimo, BC V9T 5V4

play@jumpingjiminys.com www.jumpingjiminys.com

250-729-0999

presents

With Licensed Educator Jenna Pye Trusted. Proven. Educational. And, fun! Kindermusik is the world’s leading provider of music and movement programs for young children, enjoyed by over 1.5 million families in 70+ countries.

Classes for 0 mos and up. Free tuition for babies under 6 mos. For class times, locations and to enroll visit www.kindermusik.com In Your Home Music Studio also offers private lessons in Voice, Piano and Guitar. Visit www.inyourhomemusicstudio.com for more information.

Now Serving Nanaimo and Nanoose Bay!

Check out our... · Recording, game design and animation in our MAC lab. · Private lessons or coached jams. · Fun summer camps for kids of all ages from toddlers to teens.

Come on in and give a try!

Your first workshop or private lesson is always on us!

250-933-1900 arbutusmusic.com facebook.com/arbutusmusic

www.IslandParent.ca

250.585.KIDS (5437)

Quality new and used clothing, gear, toys, and more.

Certified car seat installations available by appointment.

Exclusive Nanaimo retailer of guzzie+Guss strollers and baby equipment, Super Undies toilet training and bedwetting pants, and OAKI children’s rain suits.

Two Locations to Serve You!

in Nanaimo

Find out why Arbutus Music is the central Island’s largest Music Education Centre.

36–1925 Bowen Rd, Nanaimo

Kidz-R-Brite

Preschool & Daycare

Pre-K French Immersion Program

Registration

Comox offers new and consignment clothing NB to preteen, great selection of toys, books and all the latest baby gear.

5th St offers great toys and hobby kits, serving all ages.

www.facebook.com/PlanetKidsToys

Visit Vancouver Island’s largest specialty toy store!

Locally owned, proudly serving the mid-Island Community for over 18 years!

We are accepting Registrations for Sept. 2013 Preschool, Daycare & Pre-K French Immersion Program

Serving 2 locations in Ladysmith Contact: Miss Cindy 250-245-8276 Miss Jaclyn 1-250-510-6100

For further details: www.kidzrbrite.com

Check our new online shopping cart

www.koolandchild.com

102–2517 Bowen Rd, Nanaimo

250-585-1778 May 2013 25

Advice: Helpful or Not? Readers Respond

Advice, no matter how well intended or level-headed, can stoke a parent’s anxiety and create paroxysms of doubt. Or it can truly help. In the February issue we asked readers: What’s the best and/or the worst parenting advice you’ve ever received? What are your thoughts on unsolicited advice? Is it ever welcome and/or helpful? Here are a few replies.

Thanks to all those who sent in submissions.

Do This, Do That…

back. Start t away. Stand up straight, no sway The unsolicited advice started righ . If you’re ’t eat peanut butter or strawberries practicing your Kegel’s now. Don et foods, swe have having a boy; if you have to craving salty or sour foods, you’re k up on Stoc it. do over ’t e prenatal yoga. Don you’re having a girl. Exercise. Tak ness, sick ning mor have you If r. ge the kitty litte cloth diapers. And sleep. Don’t chan e mak will able prenatal vitamins, the others eat crackers for breakfast. Take chew can, you le whi t milk. Enjoy your peace and quie you gag. Drink milk. Don’t drink /preteen/ g pregnant/having a newborn/toddler bein y Enjo you’ll never have it again. helpful. bit t leas the not but , sure intended, young adult now; time flies. All well give a chicken casserole.

Instead, lend an ear or a hand or Robin C

Camp Footholds Footholds Therapy Center is happy to announce a wide variety of summer programs at Camp Footholds. Our camps are structured to offer programming geared towards children with special needs (Autism, FASD, etc) and other emotional and psychological challenges (Anxiety/Depression). Camp Footholds focuses on empowering kids by building social skills and self-esteem, all while having lots of fun!

Base Camp: 4–7 Years Camp Footholds will combine their awesome locations, diverse surroundings and unique staff skill set to offer amazing opportunities for all the campers involved. Base Camp will focus on encouraging positive social interactions and social thinking for campers through fun and engaging activities. Mon–Fri, July 2–19, 9am–2pm, $950

Ascent Camp: 8–12 Years Ascent Camp will offer activities such as exploring Petroglyphs around Nanaimo and surrounding areas, trips to Ammonite Falls and the Nanaimo Aquatic Centre. Promoting a healthy, physical lifestyle and giving campers a safe place to build positive peer relationships is the goal of this camp. Mon–Fri, July 22–Aug 9, 9am–2pm, $900

Peak Camp: 13–18 Years Peak Camp will teach campers to be self-directed, productive members of society. This will be done through a variety of outings, interactions with other campers and camp leaders as well as specific activities focused on building life skills and social skills.

Mon–Fri, Aug 12–30, 9am–2pm, $900

Other Camps – check our website for additional information Artistic Outlet: 10–16 Years, Mon–Fri, 9am–12pm from July 2–12 for $550 Slam Dunk: 10–16 Years, Mon–Fri, 9am–2pm from July 2–12 for $720 Welcome to the Oscars: 8–18 Years, Mon–Fri, 9am–12pm from July 15–26 for $600 Creative Minecraft: 7–15 Years, Mon–Fri, 9am–2pm from July 15–Aug 2 for $750 Fun Frogs: 4–7 Years, Mon–Fri, 9am–12pm from July 29–Aug 16 for $850 Musical Melodies: 12–18 Years Mon–Fri, 9am–12pm from Aug 6–16 for $550 Sensory Seekers: 4–10 Years Mon–Fri, 9am–12pm from Aug 19–30 for $750

250-585-4411 26

Island Parent Magazine

Read, Read, Read

Some of the best parenting advice I received was from my mother when she suggested that a key to my child’s bright future was to read to him right from babyhood, and then she gave us some books to get us started.

All through out my and my brothers’ childhoods in the 1960s, we were read to, taken to the library, and encouraged to borrow books on any topics we were interested in. Our family didn’t have a lot of money to spare, but my mother always made an effort to visit used book stores whenever she went to town (we lived on a farm) and she sought out books she thought we would like to read. I remember her coming home with paper bags full of books for me and my hardly being able to wait to dive in and see what treasures were in there. She also always let us choose some books to order from Scholastic Books through school—that was special because they were brand new books. I still have many of my childhood books 45 years later.

When, at one point, my brother resisted reading for himself in elemen tary school, she would buy him comic books and Mad magazines to read because those were what he was interested in.

She didn’t care so much what he read, she cared that he read. When I became pregnant, one of the first things I did was check out all the library programs for new moms and babies, thinking of my mother’s example with us. I’m happy to say that 10 years later, two of my son’s favourite activities are reading and visiting our local library every weekend. He, too, loves to peruse the Scholastic book order forms to make his own choices, and he, too, has a personal library of his own. I am so grateful for my mother’s example and advice about instilling a love of reading from babyhood on.

Shannon T

www.footholds.ca www.kidsinvictoria.com

Sweet Surprise

One summe r, when my second daughter was an infant, we spent a month at my in-laws’ cabin. My young daughter was a bit fussy, and cried whenever she was put down or away from her mom. My father-in-law told me that I should try putting corn syrup on her soother. The sweet taste, he said, would make her keep the soother in her mouth, and voila—no more crying baby. He swore that this was his mother’s secret and that it worked like a charm. I listened to him for days, and eventually weeks, telling me to put corn syrup on her soother, but I couldn’t bring myself to—after all, what could be worse for young developing teeth? Eventually, though, after a particularly hard morning I caved, and at his insistent prompting I clenched my teeth and slathered the soother in corn syrup and stuck it in my daughter’s mouth. After an initial look of surprise she gave a few happy and excited sucks, and spit out the soother after sucking off every last bit of syrup. The quiet lasted about 15 seconds. I turned to my father-in-law and said “OK, now what?”

Brenda M

Le français au CSF, c’est bien plus qu’une langue !

Depuis sa création en 1995, le Conseil scolaire francophone de la Colombie-Britannique offre des programmes et des services éducatifs valorisant le plein épanouissement et l’identité culturelle des apprenantes et apprenants francophones de la province.

Le conseil compte aujourd’hui plus de 4 600 élèves, 36 écoles publiques et dessert plus d’une centaine de communautés réparties dans l’ensemble de la province.

Inscrivez votre enfant dans une école du CSF !

Mean What You Say

Follow through: If you say you’re going to take some thing away because of behaviour, then take it away.

If your child know s you are going to follow through, he/she won’t test you or think there is no consequence.

Be sure the cons equence fits— don’t say “If you don’t eat you’re dinner we’re not go ing to the PNE tomorrow”—that ’s probably not go in g to ha pp en an d th e ch ild knows that you wi ll still go to the PNE. Make it rea sonable and age appropriate.

Vicki B

Nos écoles publiques daNs l’île de VaNcouVer Campbell River École Mer-et-montagne École secondaire Phoenix École secondaire Carihi

250-923-3359 1102 South Alder 250-923-3359 400, 7th Ave. 250-923-3359 350 Dogwood St.

M-6 7-9 10 - 12

Comox Valley

École au Cœur-de-l'île

250-339-1848 566 Linshart Rd.

M - 12

Nanaimo

École Océane 250-714-0761 1951 Estevan Rd. M - 7 École secondaire de Nanaimo 250-714-0761 355 Wakesiah Ave. 8 - 12

Port Alberni

École des Grands-cèdres

250-723-5614 4645 Helen St.

M-6

Victoria

École Victor-Brodeur

250-220-6010 637 Head St.

M - 12

csf.bc.ca

www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013

27

Party Directory Funtime Inflatables #1 choice for party inflatables

Hassle Free Parties for kids & families

250-474-0597

www.funtimeinflatables.ca

You provide the space and food…

We’ll provide an hour of fun with puppet shows and play

We will match any competitor’s price; we will beat any competitors service!

Trust your next party or special event to the experts, Funtime Inflatables—the original bouncy castle company.

Serving Vancouver Island since 1990.

New items arriving soon!!!

G Y M

FALCON

GYMNASTICS Birthday Parties

G Y M

N Celebrate your birthday with us!

N

Our great instructors will treat you to an action packed two hours of fun and fitness in our great facility!

A

A S T I C S

th

40 sary r Annive 2013 1973–

• 2 large decorated birthday rooms • Free T-shirt for birthday child, invitations for up to 10 children • The ONLY Inflatable Climbing Mountain with trampoline in town • Party Time now offered for many different groups (schools, daycare centres)

Book Early: 250-479-6424

#208 – 721 Vanalman Ave

(Broadmead & Royal Oak Area)

www.falcongymnastics.com

S T I C S

- t h e -

Goofball.com

For birthday, graduation, and other event entertainment with environmental and safety messages,

info@Greenleafthegoofball.com www.Greenleafthegoofball.com 28 Island Parent Magazine

250 472 3546 www.puppetbooth.homestead.com

You’ll Flip Over Our Birthday Parties * Greater Victoria’s newest, largest and cleanest facility with hassle free parking for you and your guests * * Large private party rooms * * Experienced Qualified Fun Coaches * * 3 Trampolines & 40ft Tumble Trac * * Awesome Foam Pit *

250-383-FLIP

www.lionspridegymnastics.com Located in Langford

Birthday Parties! :: Gym & Bouncy Castle, themed parties: creative kids, girl power and preschool parties from Princesses to Pirates! at Henderson Recreation Centre!

Call 250-370-7200

Pool, Skate, or Soccer parties at Oak Bay Recreation Centre!

Call 250-595-SWIM (7946)

www.recreation.oakbay.ca

musical

birthday parties Book a 45 minute interactive party in your own home for up to ten young guests from ages 3-8. Choose from three different fun themes! Visit vcm.bc.ca/departments/childrens-music/ for more information, or call 250-386-5311.

UnReality g Magic.ca

A professional magician for all your events Birthdays, festivals, fairs corporate parties, and more Bringing Comedy To Life

And Reality To An End

250-668-3082 Info@UnRealityMagic.ca www.UnRealityMagic.ca www.kidsinvictoria.com

Party Directory TM

Faoriry

ctoria

pirate

KNIGHT or

party

Monetty Georgia par

Party

party

Gymnastics

adult corporate party

Birthday Parties Come Fly With Us!

4Cats Duncan 4cats.com/duncan•250-709-2286 4Cats Langford 4cats.com/langford•778-430-5422 4Cats Oak Bay 4cats.com/oakbay•250-598-0300 4Cats Royal Oak 4cats.com/royaloak •250-590-7233

Parties sizes up to 18 kids We supply table top cover, napkins, hats, streamers and balloons Optional character

Two Certified Instructors and a Host Optional character

Gymnastics Games and Music

Par-T-Perfect

(250) 386-JUMP (5867) www.par-t-perfect.com • Indoor facility options for all your bouncy castle and inflatable requirements • School fairs/festivals and picnics • At home/indoor theme parties, i.e. Teddy Bear stuffing, craft parties • Free gift for birthday child when you mention this ad • Costumed facepainters and balloon twisters, i.e. princesses, pirates, ragdoll style clowns ur • Follow us on Facebook and Twitter Join O lub!

-C Par-T

Free t-shirt

Optional character

Dirt Bike Birthday Parties We supply everything: Bike • Gear • Riding Lesson

Optional character

for ages 6yrs to adults over 30 bikes to choose from

Westshore Motocross Park No experience necessary

Ice Cream Parlor & Family Fun Zone • 30 family oriented redemption games • huge prize counter • 2 fully decorated party rooms • foot-long hot dogs • 32 flavors of Island Farms Ice Cream

Available Sat & Sun Afternoons Corner of Store & Pembroke Optional character

250-380-2442 2207 Millstream Road Victoria, BC V9B 0J7 Tel: 250.590.8088 Cel: 250.893.9547

Learn to Ride with Us! brought to you by SG POWER We offer a complete line of entry level dirt bikes, 50cc, 70cc, 90cc non clutch bikes and 80cc,110cc, 125cc 4 strokes with clutches. All safety gear is supplied, from boots to helmets and everything in between. This 1.5 hour Learn to Ride with Us course includes the basics of a motorcycle orientation including safety gear and safe riding habits, stop-n-go circle riding, escorted first laps on motocross track, and supervised solo riding sessions.

Open Year Round

@ Western Speedway 2207 Millstream Road 250-590-4369 mrtubbs.com www.IslandParent.ca

Party Participants can win a FREE month

www.victoriagymnastics.com

2207 Millstream Rd, Langford

250 590 8088 westshoremx.com

Mr. Tubbs

Foam Landing Pit and 40’ Long Trampoline

Optional character Optional character

Action-Packed Birthday Parties Supervised • 2–8 Yrs

It’s about skills, not scores.

Go to www.sportball.ca for schedules & information Call us: 250 590 4625 Email: van.island@sportball.ca

May 2013 29

Linda Frear

The Delicate Balance in Young Adult Novels

T

he wonderful thing about young adult books is their ability to tackle larger issues in the guise of a fast-paced, welltold story. Issues such as racism, war, and accepting differences in others. Becoming an adult is a delicate balance between choosing to live how we’ve been told, and determining our own path. Teens face myriad decisions, such as who to hang out with, whether or not to continue with post-secondary education, and ultimately how they want to define themselves. Often, those are difficult choices to make. A good book can help a teen make decisions.

Libba Bray, well known for her Gemma Doyle series, continues the tradition of feisty heroines with Evie, in Diviners (Little Brown, 2012). Evie O’Neill isn’t the bestbehaved girl in Ohio. When she gets caught in yet another scandal, her mother ships her off to New York to live with a bachelor uncle. Evie thinks her life will be filled with parties and boys. Instead, she winds up in the middle of a murder investigation. Although her uncle doesn’t want her involved, Evie can’t resist. She’s never backed down from a challenge, plus she’s a bit of a daredevil.

And she has also closely guarded the real reason for the scandal in Ohio: her ability to read objects and see details from the person who owned the object. Now she has to choose between keeping that secret and using her knowledge to help solve the crime.

The wrong choice could end not only her life, but the lives of all she loves and holds dear. This book tackles some dark issues and isn’t for the faint-of-heart, but it’s well worth reading. More suited to those 15+ With more than just an exotic setting and

a delightful main character, Daughter of Smoke & Bone by Laini Taylor (Hatchett, 2012) is a book that will now reside amongst my favourites. Karou fills a sketchbook with fantastic creatures—giraffe-necked Twigi, Issa with her serpent body and pet snakes, Yasri with her parrot beak and human eyes.

And Brimstone with his great ram’s horns.

Her friends think they are the product of a vivid imagination, but to orphan Karou, they are family. Karou runs errands for Brimstone. But black handprints start to appear in the portals to Brimstone’s world, and as they flare into a burning fire, Karou is sealed off from the only home she has ever known. As she works to find a way home, she discovers some shocking things about herself. Things that will leave her with a difficult decision to make.

One of the most imaginative (and fabulous) retellings of classic fairy tales I’ve ever read are Merissa Meyer’s Cinder (Feiwel and Friends, 2012) and Scarlet (Feiwel and Friends, 2013). Linh Cinder is the best mechanic in New Beijing. Her world seems normal enough—at least as normal as it can be for a cyborg—when an unexpected customer drops a robot on her table and asks her to fix it. That wouldn’t be a problem, except he’s the prince. Soon, Cinder is tangled up in a web of politics and family strife, and her life is in danger. Cinder’s story continues in the second book, Scarlet, introducing us to Scarlet, whose grandmother has gone missing. Although the police think she took off of her own volition, Scarlet is convinced her grandmother was abducted, and she’s determined to prove it. Soon, her story and Cinder’s intersect. And yes, there are wolves.

In her book What’s Left of Me (HarperCollins, 2012), debut author Kat Zhang tackles the difficult subject of racism and blending in. Eva and Addie are sisters, but they share the same body. By six, they should have chosen which soul would be dominant, allowing the recessive soul to fade away.

But at 16, Eva is still there, lurking in the back of Addie’s mind. But hybrids—those with two souls—are considered dangerous, a menace to ordered society. When Addie’s secret is discovered, she is left with the choice between assimilating and becoming “normal.” But can she really kill her own sister—the other half of her?

Another great debut book is The Nightmare Affair by Mindee Arnett (Tor Teens, 2013). Sixteen-year-old Dusty doesn’t fit in for two reasons: she is a late bloomer, only coming in to her magical abilities a few months before starting at Arkwell Academy for magickind. And she is a darkkind— considered the lowest of the magical users, those only able to gain their ability from feeding off others. As she dream-feeds off Eli, an ordinary with no magical ability, he is dreaming of the cemetery inside Arkwell, a place he never would have visited. And he’s dreaming about a dead girl. Things become much more interesting when his dream comes true. Now Dusty has to feed from him regularly in the hopes of catching a killer. It doesn’t help that he’s very attractive, or that Dusty tends towards sarcasm as a protective measure. But as the book progresses, so does Dusty’s character. An enjoyable, quick read.

Maggie Stiefvater brings us another great book with the Raven Boys (Scholastic Press, 2012). Blue doesn’t normally see dead people, but this year as she stands beside her mother to watch the soon-to-be dead walk by, a boy comes out from the dark and speaks directly to her. She learns it means one of two things. Either he’s her true love, or she killed him. Growing up in a family of psychics, Blue knew from a

very young age that she would kill her true love, so Blue has made the choice that she won’t kiss any boys. No kissing, no true love, problem solved, right? But when the boy from the graveyard, Gansey, shows up on her doorstep looking for a psychic, Blue soon finds that her resolve to never kiss a boy won’t be such an easy decision to keep. And keeping Gansey alive might be even harder.

Then there is Divergent by Veronica Roth (HarperCollins, 2011), a book all about the choices we make and how they affect not only us, but also others. In a dystopian future, people divide into factions based on

Swimming • Canoeing • Sailing • Ropes Course • Windsurfing • Hiking • Faith Exploration • Archery • Crafts • Out-trips • Games & Skits • Campfire • Nature Study • Cycling • Swimming • Canoeing • Sailing • Ropes Course • Windsurfing • Hiking • Faith Exploration • Archery • Crafts • Out-trips • Games & Skits • Campfire • Nature Study • Cycling • Swimming • Canoeing • Sailing • Ropes Course • Windsurfing • Hiking • Faith Exploration • Archery • Crafts • Out-trips • Games & Skits • Campfire • Nature Study • Cycling • Swimming • Canoeing • Sailing • Ropes Course • Windsurfing • Hiking • Faith Exploration • Archery • Crafts • Out-trips • Games & Skits • Campfire • Nature Study • Cycling • Swimming • Canoeing • Summer Sailing • Ropes Course • Windsurfing • Hiking • Faith Camps For: Exploration • Archery • Crafts • Out-trips • Games & Skits••Leadership Campfire • Nature Children • Youth • Families Study • Cycling • George Pringle Memorial Camp Shawnigan Lake, BC United Church of Canada BCCA & UCC Accredited

• 20 Camps to Choose From • For Kids 6 to 15 • 10 New Camps • New Certification Programs www.camppringle.com 250-472-6877 • registrar@camppringle.com

GI R E ST

ER

TOD AY NL E !

IN

O

a set of virtues such as courage, selflessness and honesty. But with time, those virtues have become twisted. Just after she turns 16, Beatrice must choose her faction. It can mean leaving her family and everything she cares about. When her test results show she is Divergent, a person without a clear faction to chose from, she must hide that fact, or risk death because being Divergent also means others can’t control her. And it turns out that isn’t a good thing.

There are plenty of other young adult books where we can watch and root for people, where we can see the types of choices they make and how those choices affect them. Books where we can analyze those decisions, possibly realize that not all the decisions would be ones we would make.

Thankfully, we live in a society where our choices don’t often mean the difference between life and death—although choosing the correct university can seem like it!

Linda Frear comes from a family of readers. She learned to read while waiting in the children’s department as her mom chose library books. Linda tried to instill that same love of reading in her children, and there are now books in every room in her house. www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013

31

May 2013

Generously Sponsored by and

Family Calendar For calendar updates throughout the month visit www.kidsinvictoria.com WED 1

#207-4480 West Saanich Rd. 250-704-1178.

SUN 5

Celebrate Asian Heritage Month at Juan de Fuca Branch Library. Listen to folktales and stories from the other side of the world and make your own special craft to take home. For ages 5-8. 3:30-4:30pm. Register at www.gvpl. ca or call 250-391-0653 for more information.

4th Annual Island Savings Family Sport and Recreation Festival at the Pacific Institute for Sports Excellence. 11am-4pm. 4371 Interurban Rd. www.piseworld.com.

11th Ultimate Hobby & Toy Fair at Pearkes Arena. Action figures, vintage toys, models, trains, comics, Barbie, LEGO, video games and much, much more. Free door prize entry with admission. Dress in costume for an extra door prize entry. Charity carnival games with all proceeds to the BC Children’s Hospital.

9am-3pm. $5/adults; kids free. www.ultimatetoyfair.com.

SAT 4 Free Comic Book Day at Central Branch Library. Drop in to get your free comic and more. Dress up as your favourite comic character, enter to win awesome stuff, and check out the library’s selection of comics, manga and graphic novels. A free comic for everyone, or two if you dress up (while supplies last).

Everyone welcome. Registration not required.

9am-noon. 250-382-7241, ext. 601.

Watch Illustrator Jonathon Dalton at Work at Central Branch Library. It’s Free Comic Book Day. Drop by to meet Jonathon and observe his technique and pick up a free comic book while supplies last. For more information about Jonathon, visit www.jonathondalton. com. Everyone welcome. Registration not required. 10-11:30am. 250-382-7241, ext. 601.

Moss Street Market Opening at Moss Street and Fairfield Rd. Local organic farmers, food vendors, local musicians, great coffee and more. Something for everyone. 10am-2pm.

Children’s Health Day at Royal Oak Chiropractic. There will be a surprise mascot, family gift bags, refreshments and balloons.

World Partnership Walk Tots and Tykes Team Kick-off Event at Christ Church Cathedral School. Face painting, bouncy castle, games and special treats. An excellent opportunity for kids to learn they can make a difference in the world. 11:30am-1:30pm. Free.

Horth Hill Highlights at Horth Hill Regional Park. Hike along with a CRD Regional Parks naturalist and check out this delightful park at the tip of the Saanich Peninsula. Discover the plants at your feet, the birds over your head and great views from the top. Wear sturdy hiking shoes. Meet at the information kiosk in the parking lot off Tatlow Rd at 1pm. 8+ years. 250-478-3344. www.crd.bc.ca/parks.

Illustrator Jonathon Dalton: Drawing Comics at Juan de Fuca Branch Library. Do you love comics or manga? Here’s an opportunity to learn to draw them. Pick your style, create your own characters, and be guided through the techniques of writing, drawing and inking the first pages. For ages 13-18. 2-3:30pm. Register online at www.gvpl.ca or call 250-391-0653 for more information.

Youth Choir 61 Spring Concert at St. Aidan’s Church. Comprised of students aged 11-17 attending public school in SD #61. 7pm. 3703 St. Aidan’s St. www.choir.sd61.bc.ca.

Marvelous Matheson at Matheson Lake Regional Park. Join a CRD Regional Parks naturalist for a ramble ’round the lake, far from the sounds of urban traffic, with lunch at a scenic viewpoint. This little gem of a park is rich in cultural and natural history. Bring a snack and water and wear sturdy hiking shoes.

Meet in the parking lot at the end of Matheson Lake Rd at 10am. 12+ years. 250-478-3344. www.crd.bc.ca/parks.

Ugh! A Slug! at Elk/Beaver Lake Regional Park. Stroll along with a CRD Regional Parks naturalist to peek under fallen logs and leaves in search of giant gastropods that are one of nature’s best recyclers. Meet at the information kiosk in the Beaver Lake parking lot at 1pm. All ages. BC Transit #70 or #72. 250-478-3344. www.crd.bc.ca/parks.

MON 6 Author/Illustrator Marthe Jocelyn: ‘Sneaky Art’ at Esquimalt Branch Library. Where do authors find their inspiration? Explore Marthe Jocelyn’s newest book Sneaky Art as she

introducing

3 Blueberry Crunch Frozen Yogurt

32 Island Parent Magazine

Honey Vanilla Walnut Frozen Yogurt

Mango Sherbet

Made right, right here.

www.kidsinvictoria.com

reveals her everyday sources of inspiration.

Marthe will show you how to spark your imagination, fuel the research process and turn everyday ideas into written works. For Grades 4-7 and great for homeschoolers too.

10:30-11am. Register online at www.gvpl.ca or call 250-414-7198 for more information.

Author/Illustrator Marthe Jocelyn: How a Book is Made at Nellie McClung Branch Library. Wondering how an author/illustrator creates a book? Find out with Marthe Jocelyn and explore her books as she discusses her creative life writing books and illustrating the pictures. For Grades 2-4 and great for homeschoolers too. 1:30-2:30pm. Register at www. gvpl.ca or call 250-477-7111 for information.

Victoria Children’s Literature Roundtable at Nellie McClung Branch Library. Meet Marthe Jocelyn, award-winning author and illustrator.

Marthe was a toy designer before turning her hand to writing. She has written picture books, novels and non-fiction, including Hannah’s Collections, Earthly Astonishments and A Home For Foundlings. Doors open at 7pm.

Browse the CanLit for Kids Books table before the meeting begins at 7:30pm. VCLR is open to the public. Members free; $5/drop-in; $4/ students. For information, call 250-598-3694.

THURS 9 Author Caroline Woodward: Fear and Imagination at Emily Carr Branch Library. How can you use your imagination to overcome fear?

Explore two of author Caroline Woodward’s books, Singing Away the Dark and The Village of Many Hats, and discover how she uses singing and magical hats to overcome everyday fear. For Grades 2-4. 10:30-11:30am. Register online at www.gvpl.ca or call 250-475-6100 for more information.

SAT 11 Winged Migration at Elk/Beaver Lake Regional Park. Celebrate the return of our feathered friends. Join CRD Regional Parks, Rocky Point Bird Observatory and the Victoria Natural History Society to learn more about the journey that birds take from their summer and winter

homes. Engaging activities for birders of all ages, expertise and abilities. Guided walks, mist-netting demonstrations, hummingbird and passerine banding demonstrations, and children’s activities. Meet at the Filter Beds parking lot off Beaver Lake Rd. 9am-2pm, drop-in. All ages. BC Transit #70 or #72.

250-478-3344. www.crd.bc.ca/parks.

Kids Mega Sale at Pearkes Recreation Centre.

Gently used baby and children’s clothing, toys, equipment and maternity. 9:30am-12:30pm.

3100 Tillicum Rd. kidsmegasale@gmail.com.

Quadra Village Day on Kings Rd. All-ages activities start with a pancake breakfast. Music and dance performances, face painting, bouncy castle, obstacle course, games, Mother’s Day crafts, climbing wall for teens, instrument petting zoo. Free.

Tartan Parade starts in Centennial Square. Pipe bands, highland dancers, heavy event athletes, a float and more. Starts in Centennial Square at 11am and heads down Government St to the Legislature Lawns where the pipe bands perform, the highlands fling is danced, and the caber is tossed. victoriahighlandgames.com.

Magic Workshop with Andrew: Magic with Everyday Objects at Oak Bay Branch Library.

Join Andy for a two-part program to learn fun and fascinating magic tricks using items you can find around your home. Second part on May 18. For ages 10-12. 2:30-3:30pm.

Register online at www.gvpl.ca or call 250592-2489 for more information.

SAT 11 & Sun 12 150th Annual Victoria Highland Games & Celtic Festival in Topaz Park. Heavy event competitions. Highland dance competitions, sheepdog herding, kilted mile athletics, tugof-war competition and a variety of Scottish and Celtic dance and music entertainment throughout the park. Children’s entertainment area. $15/adults; children free. victoriahighlandgames.com.

SUN 12 Mother’s Day Swim at Panorama Recreation.

Your Time c trl www.IslandParent.ca

Need more time to connect with family?

Order your groceries ONLINE!

TM

Bring the whole family to get active and have fun, or join us solo for lane swimming, aquafit, hot tub, steam or sauna. Moms get in free!

All day. 1885 Forest Park Dr. 250-655-2182. www.panoramarecreation.ca.

Sandy Shore Explore at Witty’s Lagoon Regional Park. Join a CRD Regional Parks naturalist for an intertidal exploration and discover the wonderful creatures that appear between the tides. Be prepared to get your feet wet (bring sandals or beach shoes). Meet at the kiosk at the end of Witty Beach Rd at 10am. 5+ years. BC Transit #54 or #55. 250478-3344. www.crd.bc.ca/parks.

Mother’s Day Paint-In and Craft Fair at Royal Roads University. Local artists and crafts people, student fine art exhibit, family entertainment, main-stage performances, children’s craft station and complimentary access to Hatley Castle and the gardens. 10am-4pm.

Free. 250-391-2666.

WED 15 Coast Capital Free Swim at Panorama Recreation. The waterslide and rope swing will be open during this free swim for everyone.

6-7:30pm. 1885 Forest Park Dr. 250-6552182. www.panoramarecreation.ca.

Natural Medicine at Home at Dr. Zimmermann’s office. Learn how to use safe, effective natural remedies to treat yourself and your family. From colds, flus and earaches to minor injuries, colics, teething and digestive upsets, Dr. Zimmermann will teach you from her

Your destination for delicious!

Visit www.thriftyfoodsonline.com to place your order for pick-up or delivery up to three weeks in advance.

Customer Care: 1.800.667.8280 May 2013 33

extensive experience. 7-9pm. $10. Please call 250-590-5828 to reserve a spot. #304-2250 Oak Bay Ave. www.drzimmermann.org.

FRI 17 Celebrate Asian Heritage Month at Emily Carr Branch Library. See WED 1 for details. For ages 5-8. 2:30-3:30pm. Register at www.gvpl. ca or call 250-475-6100 for more information.

Victoria Art Finale Juried Exhibition at Vancouver Island School of Art. Opening reception of a juried exhibition of Grade 12 students’ art. 7:30pm. 2549 Quadra St. www. vancouverislandschoolofart.com.

SAT 18 Victoria Symphony Storytime at Nellie McClung Branch Library. Join two musicians from the Victoria Symphony and their puppet friend, Kathy Cadence, for a musical performance that matches music to words and feelings.

Presentation includes an instrument petting zoo. Parents and caregivers are welcome to participate. For ages 3-4. 10:30-11:15am.

Register online at www.gvpl.ca or call 250477-7111 for more information.

Mount Work-Out at Mount Work Regional Park. Join a CRD Regional Parks naturalist on a vigorous hike from marshy lowlands to rugged rocky outcrops. Bring a lunch, water and rain gear, and wear sturdy hiking shoes.

Meet in Munn Rd parking lot at 10:30am. 12+ years. 250-478-3344. www.crd.bc.ca/parks.

SUN 19 Family Sunday at Art Gallery of Greater Victoria. Children and their families are invited to explore the art inspired by the current exhibition. Included with Gallery admission or free with membership. 2-4pm. 250-384-4171. www.aggv.ca.

WED 22 Vaccinations: Confused? at Dr. Zimmermann’s office. Are you confused about vaccination?

Do you worry about the number of shots given or the aluminum in vaccines? Do you want to opt out of vaccination, use only some shots or use the standard program but help your child to tolerate it better? Interested in homeopathic prophylaxis or other natural methods to strengthen your child’s immune system? Dr. Zimmermann can help you make an informed decision that is right for your family. 7-9pm. $10. Please call 250-590-5828 to reserve a spot. #304-2250 Oak Bay Ave. www.drzimmermann.org.

SAT 25 Victoria Symphony Storytime at Saanich Centennial Branch Library. See SAT 18 for details. Parents and caregivers are welcome

to participate. For ages 3-4. 10:30-11:15am.

Register online at www.gvpl.ca or call 250477-9030 for more information.

Community Tennis Day at Henderson Recreation Centre. Come try tennis in a new easy to learn way. There will be something for everyone of all ages. 11am-3pm. www.sitatennis.ca.

Island Children’s Festival at Island Montessori. Celebrate families and community with a full afternoon of children’s performances and activities including two-time Juno Award winner Fred Penner. Noon-5pm. $10; free for children under 5. All proceeds support the Island Education Access Fund. 5575 West Saanich Rd. www.islandchildrensfestival.com.

SAT 25 & SUN 26 Victoria Spot Prawn Festival at the Carshop Building, Bayview Place. Touch, taste and find out more about local sustainable seafood. Seafood cooking demonstrations, food vendors, kids’ activities, artisan booths, live music and more. 253 Esquimalt Rd.

SUN 26 World Partnership Walk at Cameron Bandshell, Beacon Hill Park. An excellent opportunity for kids to learn that they can make a difference in the world. Registration at 10am, walk at 11am. Free.

Need more Dough?

Health • Will you outlive your money or will your money outlive you?

• Paying too much tax? Saving enough money?

Safety • Having your health, you have everything you need.

Are you adequately protected?

Results • You already research for the best products/service/price, does it make sense for you to do the same for a financial plan?

• RESPs are fine for education, but have you discovered PAR? • Anyone over 40 would say ‘yes’: “Would you have started earlier?”

May I have the privilege to lead you through a proven, strategic process where results will be felt now and long into the future?

Michael A. Hemmings, Consultant

250-388-4234 – Ext. 507 250-818-1119 – Cell michael.hemmings@investorsgroup.com

34 Island Parent Magazine

Investors Group: more than investments, no less than debt, tax, savings, asset and protection planning! www.kidsinvictoria.com

The Great Strides Walk at Royal Roads University. The 3km walk is a family-, stroller- and pet-friendly occasion for all ages. Registration by donation. In support of Cystic Fibrosis Canada. Registration 9am, walk starts at 10am.

BBQ and prize draw after the walk. Gather in the gym parking lot. Everyone welcome.

What’s That? Ask a Nat! at Island View Beach Regional Park. Come with your curiosity to explore low tide and all the marine critters it reveals. Borrow our dip nets and ask CRD Regional Parks naturalists to identify your treasures. Be prepared to get your feet wet (bring sandals or beach shoes). Meet at the picnic shelter on Homathko Rd, off Island View Rd. 10am-2pm drop-in. All ages. 250478-3344. www.crd.bc.ca/parks.

7th Annual Infertility Awareness BBQ at Gordon Head Middle School. Silent auction for Fertile Future (www.fertilefuture.ca); lunch including hot dogs, veggies, cake and juice; crafts and activities for the children.

Everyone welcome. Noon-2pm. Please RSVP to clementine@victoriafertility.com.

A Guide to User-Friendly Trails Go beyond the parking lot and pick up your copy of “A Guide to User-Friendly Trails” featuring easy-to-use walking, hiking and wheeling trails in Greater Victoria, BC. Features: • Trails suitable to individuals of diverse ages, levels of mobility and endurance.

• Trail profiles and maps to enable users to determine which parks and amenities to visit.

Pick up your copy at Capital Regional District Offices, West Shore Parks & Recreation and municipal halls in the Westshore area.

Download it at www.westshorerecreation.ca/userfriendlytrails

Bee Day at Swan Lake Christmas Hill Nature Sanctuary. A honey of a program fit for the royalty of the insect world. What’s the buzz about bees—are they really good dancers?

Bee songs, bee crafts and some bee spit to taste. Join us and you’ll bee amazed, bee enchanted and bee happy. Bee there or bee square. Noon-3pm. Admission by donation.

For more information, call 250-479-0211 or visit www.swanlake.bc.ca.

WED 29 Guys’ Night Out: A Bedtime Storytime at Saanich Centennial Branch Library. Calling dads, stepdads, granddads, uncles… bring the kids you love to a special storytime before they go to bed. Join us for stories, puppets, fingerplays and songs. Pajamas and a favourite stuffy or blanket are welcome, but optional.

For children newborn to 5 years. 6:30-7pm.

Register online at www.gvpl.ca or call 250477-9030 for more information.

Supported by:

Developed in partnership with:

ONGOING BABIES, TODDLERS & PRESCHOOL Drop-in Storytimes for Babies, Toddlers and Families at Greater Victoria Public Library.

Caregivers are welcome and encouraged to participate. Storytimes are free and dropin. Please come early to find a space. For a complete schedule of our drop-in programs, visit our website at www.gvpl.ca or call your local branch.

Parent/Tot Drop-in at Gordon Head United Church. A safe place where young children can play while parents in the community connect with each other. Lots of space and toys. Tea or coffee is available for caregivers, and a healthy

www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013

35

snack for the children. Parents are responsible for the care of their own children. Mondays 10am-noon. More info, call the church office at 250-477-4142, or Maisie at 250-477-0388.

Car Seats & Strollers Carriers & Slings Nursing Products Diapers & Diaper Bags Swaddles & Sleep Sacks Toys & Crafts Shoes & Boots Now in

2945 Jacklin Road 250-478-1737 www.jamtots.com

The Canadian Heritage Arts Society

Fun, full-day sessions for passionate young artists in a conservatory setting

Kindergym at Burnside Campus Gymnasium.

Ride-on toys, climbers, slides, balls, hoops and various sports equipment. The program includes free play, organized games and circle time. Best suited for ages 2-4 year, but all children under 5 years are welcome. Parent participation required. Tuesdays 9:30-10:45am.

Free. 3130 Jutland Rd. 250-388-5251. www. burnsidegorge.ca.

Preschool Storytime at Saanich Centennial Branch Library. Preschoolers are invited to fun and interactive storytimes that will help foster early literacy development. We’ll share enriching stories, sing songs, learn rhymes and have fun playing with language. Parents and caregivers are welcome to participate.

Tuesdays 10:30-11am. Register at www.gvpl. ca or call 250-477-9030 for more information.

Toddler Art at Burnside Gorge Community Centre. Explore your creative side. Smocks and soap provided, but please dress children in clothing that they can get messy and be creative in. Parent participation required. $2/drop-in.

Wednesdays, 9:30am-10:30am. 471 Cecelia Rd. 250-388-5251. www.burnsidegorge.ca.

Drop-in Play at Lakehill Preschool. Come join our awesome ECE for a free drop-in play every Wednesday 3-4:30pm. All children 0-4 welcome. 3821 Cedar Hill Cross Rd. 250-4774141. www.lakehillpreschool.org.

Drop-in Playgroup at Lambrick Park Preschool & Childcare. For parents/guardians with children 0-4 years. Come see what Lambrick Park Preschool & Childcare has to offer. Thursdays 3:15-4:30pm. 4205 Tyndall Ave. 250-477-8131. For more information, visit www.lambrickparkpreschool.ca.

Drop-in Toddler Time at Lansdowne Preschool. A great place to play and discover.

For children ages 0-5. Fridays 9:30-11am, in the Maple Room at Carnarvon Centre, 3802 Henderson Rd. 250-370-5392. www. lansdownepreschool.com.

Mother Goose Drop-In at Burnside Gorge Community Centre. Enjoy music, stories and fun with your little one. Mother Goose encourages child development through music, stories, movement and attachment parenting.

For birth to 5 years. This program is offered in partnership with Success by 6 South Vancouver Island. Saturdays 10-11am. Free.

Children

www.ccpacanada.com 36  Island Parent Magazine

Comic Book and Star Wars Trivia at the Greater Victoria Public Library. Did you know that Free Comic Book Day and Star Wars Day are both happening on May 4? GVPL is celebrating with the launch of an online trivia contest for all ages. Test your knowledge

www.kidsinvictoria.com

and enter to win a gift certificate to a local bookstore. Contest runs online at www.gvpl. ca from May 4-May 31. For all ages. “May the fourth be with you!”

Sea-Shirt Sundays at the Shaw Ocean Discovery Centre. On the first Sunday of each month, create your own fish fashion. Be sure to bring a pillow case, cloth bag or t-shirt (or purchase a t-shirt from the centre) and your creativity. $2 donation for fabric paint. 1-4pm.

250-665-7511.

YOUTH Comic Book and Star Wars Trivia at the Greater Victoria Public Library. Did you know that Free Comic Book Day and Star Wars Day are both happening on May 4? GVPL is celebrating with the launch of an online trivia contest for all ages. Test your knowledge and enter to win a gift certificate to a local bookstore. Contest runs online at www.gvpl. ca from May 4-May 31. For all ages. “May the fourth be with you!”

FAMILIES Parent Sports Drop-in at James Bay Community School Centre. Parents need time to have fun and get back in touch with their inner child.

Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, 7-9pm. $3.50/person. www.jamesbaycentre.ca.

Ready to Rent BC offers a free course to help

find and keep a rental home. Six-week courses run at different times, days and locations. We help renters identify and deal with any barriers they may have to housing. Includes bus tickets, child minding and a healthy snack. To sign up, call 250-388-7171. readytorentbc.net.

Come Join the Fun

Weekly Bird Walk at Swan Lake Nature Sanctuary (meet in the parking lot). Every Wednesday and Sunday noon-3pm.

Metchosin School Museum is open Saturdays 1:30-4:30pm and Sundays 11am-4:30pm.

An original, one-room school house built in 1871, it is set up as a classroom with old wooden desks. Families can enjoy perusing the hundreds of artifacts on display. Free. 4475 Happy Valley Rd. Wonder Sunday at the Royal BC Museum.

Bring your family on the last Sunday of each month for activities and explorations inspired by different parts of the museum. Make crafts, join special tours, and let your imagination wonder away with you. Suitable for children ages 3-12 years old and is included with admission or free with membership. www. royalbcmuseum.bc.ca.

Gorge Waterway Nature House in Esquimalt/ Gorge Park. Aquarium touch-tank, microscopes, interactive displays and friendly staff.

Sundays 11am-4pm, May to August. All ages welcome. Admission by donation. 250-3807585 or education@worldfish.org.•

Summer Programs • Year round lessons for children and adults • Safe well schooled lesson horses with qualified instructors • Indoor and outdoor riding facility

250-652-1462

www.westsidestables.ca

ON THE SOUTH ISLAND

WWW.BCNDP.CA Authorized by Heather Harrison, Financial Agent, 604-430-8600 | CUPE 3787

www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013 37

Around the Island Visit www.IslandParent.ca for these and other events and resources for families from Cowichan Valley north to Campbell River and west to Tofino WED 1 – TUES 7 Youth Week in Parksville. An international celebration recognizing the value, diversity and positive contributions youth make in the community. To find out what’s happening, visit www.rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

WED 1 Glow in the Dark Skate at Cliff McNabb Arena. Skate in an atmosphere of dimmed lighting and special effects. Glow necklaces $2.

Regular admission. 6:30-8pm. 250-756-5200.

THURS 2 Youth Week Lazer Tag at Oceanside Place Arena. Youth 11-18 will have the opportunity to participate in Lazer Tag on the dry floor.

No skates or skating required this time. Bring your friends and join the celebration. 6:308:30pm. Free. 250-248-3252. www.rdn.bc.ca/ recreation.

FRI 3 Tots Movie Night Out at Bowen Complex, Nanaimo. Are you a parent wanting to take your child out for a movie but are worried about disrupting the audience? Bring your little one out for a movie and get them used to sitting in an environment much like a movie theatre. Popcorn and drink included. $5/child; parents free. 6-7:45pm. 250-756-5200.

Mardi Gras Pro-D Day Swim at Ravensong Aquatic Centre. During the Everyone Welcome swim session, there will be lots of fun and celebration. Enjoy a carnival of events that will include mask making. 1-3pm. 250-752-5014. www.rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

Youth Week Swim at Ravensong, Parksville.

Youth 11-18 will have an opportunity to be active, wild and wet while hanging out in the pool listening to the beats of DJ All Good, Vancouver Island’s premier DJ. 7-9pm. Free.

250-752-5014. www.rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

SAT 4 Take a Kid Fishing at Chemainus Lake. Kids can visit educational booths to find out about identifying fish, rules and regulations about local lakes and rivers, and how to tie knots and cast on prior to fishing catchable-size trout supplied by the Fish Hatchery in Duncan. Fly-

38 Island Parent Magazine

tying demonstrations and other fun activities.

Each child receives a free hot dog and drink.

10am-2pm. Free. 250-743-8070.

BookFest in Downtown Nanaimo. Join some of the best Canadian authors and illustrators for a fun-packed day of story and entertainment. Purchase tickets for three sessions from the Port Theatre, 250-754-8550. $10/child or $25/family pass. Aimed at elementary kids, there are also free sessions for preschoolers and lively lunch time entertainment for everyone.

10am-2:30pm. For more information, visit www.bookfest.ca.

MON 6

and fun. Tea and goodies will be included.

Moms get in free. 2-4pm. 250-756-5200.

TUES 14 Tim’s Tuesday Free Swim at Frank Jameson Aquatic Centre, Ladysmith. Gather friends and family for this sponsored swim. Please bring a non-perishable food or monetary donation for the Ladysmith Food Bank. 6:30-7:55pm.

WED 15 Glow in the Dark Skate at Cliff McNabb Arena. Skate in an atmosphere of dimmed lighting and special effects. Glow necklaces $2.

Regular admission. 6:30-8pm. 250-756-5200.

SAT 18 Bubble Bonanza Family Swim at Ravensong Aquatic Centre. Come for bubbles of fun.

Make the largest bubbles and see how long they will last. 10am-noon. 250-752-5014. www.rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

SUN 19

BC Boys Choir at the Port Theatre. A final public performance after the all-day Walk-aSong fundraiser. Free, but you must reserve your ticket (maximum six tickets per order). www.porttheatre.com.

Take a Hike for Families at Westwood Lake.

Discover trails you may not have travelled before. Have fun learning about nature, plants, birds and wildlife by playing nature bingo.

1-3pm. $15/family of 4; $8/family of 2; $5/ person. 250-756-5200.

FRI 10

SAT 25

Move for Health at Ladysmith Parks, Recreation and Culture. Free classes and activities that will help in your quest for a healthy and active lifestyle. All day. Space limited, so call to register. 250-245-6424. www.ladysmith.ca.

29th Annual Family Fun Fair at the Cobble Hill Hall & Fair Grounds. Mini golf and games, silent auction, apple pies, great food, entertainment, creative woodworking, bouncy castle, face painting and more. Free admission.

10am-3pm.

SAT 11 Learn to Fish at Long Lake (Loudon Park), Nanaimo. Catch the fun and learn about fish identification, conservation, handling, tackle and rod rigging. All equipment provided. Parent participation required. 11am-1pm. Free.

250-756-5200.

Move for Health Day at Ravensong Aquatic Centre. Come and get active with events in support of healthy, active living. 1:30-5pm. Free.

250-752-5014. www.rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

SUN 12 Family Minute to Win it at Ravensong Aquatic Centre. Family fun challenges for Mother’s Day. Compete for prizes and bragging rights.

A variety of silly games that give you a minute to show your stuff. Everyone welcome.

10am-noon. 250-752-5014. www.rdn.bc.ca/ recreation.

Marvelous Moms: Mother’s Day Special at Beban Pool. How marvelous is your mom? Bring her to the pool for an afternoon of pampering

Parent & Tot Forest Exploration at Nanaimo & Area Land Trust (Native Plant Nursery).

Parents and tots can enjoy a guided walk through the woods followed by nature crafts, story time, refreshments and potting your own strawberry plant to take home. Bring a picnic to enjoy afterwards. 10-11:30am. $15/family of 4; $8/family of 2; $5/person. 250-756-5200.

Learn to Fish at Long Lake (Loudon Park), Nanaimo. See SAT 11 for details. Parent participation required. 11am-1pm. Free.

250-756-5200.

SUN 26 Qualicum Beach Family Day Swim at Ravensong Aquatic Centre. A special day for everyone. Come out and play. Free. 10am-noon.

250-752-5014. www.rdn.bc.ca/recreation.

Children’s Spring Carnival at the Farmer’s Institute, Salt Spring Island. Games, magic show, face painting, arts & crafts, pony rides, petting zoo, bouncy castle, live music, and more. 10am-3pm. $10/family; $5/adults;

www.kidsinvictoria.com

$2/children 7-13; children under 6 free. 351 Rainbow Rd. 250-537-1817.

ONGOING PRESCHOOL LaFF at the Aggie. A safe play-based learning environment for families and caregivers with children newborn to age 6. Reading centre, craft area, Brio train station, and snack table.

Indoor car and toy riding area. Monday to Friday, 9:30am-noon and Thursdays 12:151:45pm. $2 suggested donation per family (punch cards available). 250-210-0870, laffexecutivedirector@shaw.ca, www.familyandfriends.ca.

Adventures in Early Literacy at the Ladysmith Resource Centre. A parent-child, fun-filled program designed for children ages 3-5 years.

Participants learn and have fun doing crafts, playing games and singing. A book is read, lunch and snacks are provided. 9:45-noon.

Space is limited, so call 250-245-3079 to get on the list. 630 2nd Ave.

Children Parent & Child Hockey at Cliff McNabb Arena. A fun, non-competitive hockey time for children where their parents can play, too.

Please bring your own gloves, stick, and helmet with face cage. Pre-registration required. Parent participation required. Sundays 2:15-3pm. $5. 250-756-5200.

National Lifejacket Day Colouring Contest.

The Canadian Red Cross and Ravensong Aquatic Centre challenge you to join them in marking the day by submitting an entry.

Colouring sheets and entry details will be available at RAC and online at www.rdn.bc.ca/ recreation and on Facebook starting May 1.

All entries due May 16 at 4:30pm. For more information, phone RDN, Recreation and Parks at 250-752-5014.

YOUTH The Youth Zone in Ladysmith. A fun and safe place to hang out, meet new friends and enjoy games tables, internet kiosk, TV, movies, board games, karaoke and more. Play sports in the gym, even do homework. Energized leaders will challenge you to try new activities. Tuesdays, 3-6pm in the Rec Room; Wednesdays, 3-5pm in the gym; Fridays 6-10pm in the Rec Room or gym. 250-245-6424. www.ladysmith.ca.

The Zone Youth Hang-Out at Beban Park Complex, Nanaimo. Come and hang out with your friends and participate in a different activity each week. Movie nights, dodge ball, soccer,

or electronic night. For 11- to 13-year-olds. $6/drop-in. Fridays, 7-9pm. 250-756-5200.

FAMILY Golden Shoe Hunt. The RDN is fortunate to have 12 regional parks and over 180 community parks in the 7 electoral areas. Take some time to explore these treasures with your family. Clues and instructions for the hunt will be posted at www.rdn.bc.ca/recreation and on Facebook and Twitter until May 17.

Family Frolics at the Community Centre, Ladysmith. Bring your parent or caregiver for open gym fun. Burn off some energy with soft toys (balls and nerf-type games), mini-trampoline, ride-on toys, hula hoops and more. Tuesdays, 5:45-6:45pm. $2 suggested donation/family.

250-245-6424. www.ladysmith.ca.

Edible Native Plant Walk in Oceanside. Join local herbalist and plant enthusiast Stephanie Mills for a plant walk through local parks.

Discover how to identify, prepare and incorporate them into your own back yard. May 8 & 15: Englishman River Regional Park; May 22 & 29: Moorecroft Regional Park. 4:306:30pm. $15/session. Pre-register with RDN, Recreation and Parks at 250-248-3252.•

Send Us Your Stories!

Pick up your copy of Island Parent at any of one our 25 Serious Coffee locations. www.IslandParent.ca

Island Parent is looking for articles for upcoming issues. Some of our best content comes from people just like you—Vancouver Island parents who are passionate about their families and are dealing with the day to day issues of raising children in our community. Share your experiences, your thoughts on a particular issue, your ideas on places to see or projects to do—anything related to parenting.

Check our Writer’s Guidelines at www.islandparent.ca for specific information on submissions. We’d love to hear from you. Please email submissions to editor@islandparent.ca.

May 2013 39

FITNESS CLASSES FOR NEW PARENTS

Get back in shape and attend to your child’s needs at the same time.

Stroller Boot Camp

Classes are held outdoors and indoors and include a variety of strength, endurance, and interval exercise.

FITNESS STUDIO M 10:30-11:30am May 6-Jun 24 $40/8 81141 W 10:30-11:30am May 8-Jun 26 $40/8 81135

Stroller Fit

Classes are held both outdoors and indoors and include power walking, toning and flexibility exercises.

FITNESS STUDIO F 10:30-11:30am May 10-Jun 28 $40/8 81137

Anna Sorgard

Mission Mompossible T

he first cry from my 20-month-old daughter comes most days at 5:07 a.m.

If I jump out of bed immediately and sprint to her room I can get to her before she starts full-on crying and wakes her brother.

Then the get-her-back-to-sleep game begins. First, I turn on her lullaby CD, make sure she has her soother, two dolls and baby orca stuffie and change her diaper stealthily, all without making too much eye contact.

I know the jig is up if she starts yelling “Milk! Milk!” or “Book! Book!” If I hear either of those words, I know it’s all over.

She’s up. I’m up. I turn on the lights.

If, however, I successfully change her with no shouts, there is a tiny chance she will go back to sleep. I bundle up an armful

My favourite days are those when all three are sleeping and there is a chance for a few minutes alone. I tiptoe down the stairs, quieter than Santa on Christmas Eve. The bottom step is the worst; no matter where I step, some days it creaks, other days it doesn’t. Once down, I sneak into the kitchen, careful not to turn on many lights.

I flick the switch on the coffee maker.

Usually, the minute the coffee begins to drip, one of the children wakes up. Our coffee maker is so loud that it sounds exactly like the pot full of boiling eggs my grandma used to make when I slept over. If I’m lucky enough to pour some coffee, the three loud beeps signalling that the brewing is finished will most definitely wake someone up and

of toddler, dolls and “bankies” and rock her in our rickety old chair. The chair is on its last legs, but the reassuring creaks and cracks lull my little one back to calmness.

Her big blue eyes start to flutter a little and I gather her up, ease her into the crib and tiptoe out of the room. I close her door as quietly as possible, then pause at my bedroom door and listen. Music to my ears is hearing my husband and five-year-old son breathing deeply in the big bed, still asleep.

Most mornings I hear a chipper little boy voice asking, “Daddy? Is it time to wake up?

Where’s Mommy? Can I go find Mommy?”

so begins the cry of “Momma! Momma!”

If, by some miracle, no one wakes from the beeps, I’ll either knock something over, step on a piece of Lego or crash into the table and break the silence.

I love it when one child wakes before the other. I pour them some milk and have some precious early morning cuddles with them before the sibling rivalry, hugs, yells and laughter begin for another day.

Stroller Spin

Classes are held in the Fitness Studio and include a spin class and some core strengthening and stretching.

FITNESS STUDIO Tu 11:30-12:30pm May 7-Jun 25 $40/8 81139

Yoga – Prenatal

Yoga is a wonderful way to nurture you and your growing baby. Gentle movements strengthen and open the body to meet the changes of pregnancy. Postures include variations for all stages of pregnancy.

JDF UPPER CLUBHOUSE Th 5:30-7:00pm May 9-Jun 27 $80/8 81182 Th 5:30-7:00pm Jul 4-Aug 1 $56/5 81183 Th 5:30-7:00pm Aug 8-Aug 29 $40/4 81196

250-478-8384

westshorerecreation.ca 40 Island Parent Magazine

Anna Sorgard is a mom of two, living in Victoria. She blogs at www.murphymusthavehadkids.com. www.kidsinvictoria.com

Jerri Carson

Active Play Through Music P

laying and being active help promote a child’s healthy growth and development.

One excellent way to encourage active play is through music. For children, listening to music while playing helps them learn patterns and rhythms as well as develop physical fitness, balance and coordination. Here are some music play ideas to get you started.

1. Music play with small instruments.

Holding small instruments, such as bells, is fun for children. It helps them listen to the rhythms as they dance. No small instruments? Encourage kids to march and skip while tapping sticks. Try popsicle sticks or wooden coffee stirrers. Shaking maracas is fun, too. Construct your own maraca by filling a small cardboard tube with rice or lentils, then shake it to the beat. Or make a simple drum with a paper plate and a small tapping stick.

2. Music play with stuffies and toys. Dancing with a favourite teddy bear, doll, or stuffy can be fun. Encourage kids to improvise with their stuffy by skipping, marching, sliding or tiptoeing to the music. Or hop like a kangaroo, gallop like a horse or swim like a fish with their stuffy.

3. Music play with scarves and ribbons.

Holding a lightweight scarf while dancing encourages children to bend, stretch and reach. The room becomes alive with colour as they twirl, swirl and leap with the scarves.

To begin, encourage kids to “free play” and explore with the scarf. Play a variety of music with varied tempos as they move around the room. Encourage large circular arm movements, high and low stretches and side-to-side reaches. Long colourful ribbons can be fun, too. Try dancing with the ribbons outside on a windy day.

4. Music play with beanbags. Beanbags are fun to play with and help to develop muscle coordination and balance. Your child can dance, balance and juggle with the beanbag.

Balance it on your head while walking to music with a slow tempo. Balance it on a shoulder while slowly turning in a circle. Or put the beanbag on the floor and hop over it to a faster tempo. Make your own beanbag by filling a rolled up sock with dried beans or use a beanie baby.

5. Music play with balls. Playing with balls while listening to music is fun and helps to develop hand-eye coordination and rhythm skills. Start with sitting and rolling the ball back and forth with a partner. Play slow music, then speed up the music for faster rolls. Try bouncing the ball to the music beat. Try different size balls.

There are many other music play ideas that can be explored. Try playing and dancing with hula-hoops. Or, play dress-up and make believe and dance to the music. The ideas are endless. Have fun!

Jerri Carson is a primary music teacher for SD #61. She is a member of the CRD Arts Advisory Council. Jerri plays the cello in the Victoria Conservatory Cello Orchestra.

Confident girls. Inspiring women.

St. Margaret’s School provides an exceptional environment where girls can be themselves, find their voices and discover their passions.

ENROL NOW FOR FALL 2013 Contact our Admissions Office for more info: admissions@stmarg.ca | 250-479-7171

ST. M ARGARET’S SCHOOL

DAY GRADES: PRESCHOOL-12 | BOARDING GRADES: 7-12 Discover why girls thrive here at stmarg.ca

SMS_May_b&w.indd 1

www.IslandParent.ca

4/22/2013 2:52:07 PM

May 2013 41

Selinde Krayenhoff

The Bigger Picture Nursery to High School in a

vibrant island community, abundant with the arts, surrounded by organic farms and endless outdoor adventures.

Discover the Cowichan Warmland

Established in 1980, Sunrise Waldorf School is located in the Cowichan Valley, 45 min North of Victoria on Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada.

Elementary School |Preschool| Parent Child at the Main Campus 4344 Peters Rd Duncan BC sunrisewaldorfschool.org Tel. 250-743-7253 High School at the Island Oak Campus 5814 Banks Rd Duncan BC islandoak.org Tel. 250-701-0400 42 Island Parent Magazine

W

hat if…your children need something more basic than a trip to Disneyland, the latest piece of technology, or the birthday/Christmas pile of presents that breaks your bank account?

What if…they don’t even know how to ask for what they need? What if…their insatiable nagging is for something other than stuff?

What if…your children are simply yearning to know what it is that makes you tick?

In his book, It’s a Meaningful Life, It Just Takes Practice, author Bo Lozoff suggests that what children really long for and need is to know their parents; to know what their parents think, how they deal with the challenges life offers, what they value, what they think life is all about.

If actions speak louder than words, are we conscious of how our lives, as adults and parents, are speaking to our children?

How many of us didn’t get to know our parents or grandparents until later in life, when the reality of death nudged us to ask the questions we’d never thought to ask before?

To wonder and learn about the values that shaped us into the people we are today?

As I speak to various parent and education groups, I often start talking about values.

I use an exercise to engage the listeners.

On a flipchart I write the following words: “As a parent (teacher), I should be…” and then invite input. People call out words like “organized,” “responsible,” “a good cook,” “unflappable,” “patient,” “a good listener,” “know CPR,” “good at math,” “a willing chauffeur,” etc.

Once I have a good long list, I ask the people to peruse it and tell me how they feel.

I hear words like “overwhelmed,” “inadequate,” “defeated,” “tired,” “despairing,” and so on. One woman summed it up, “It’s just too much for any one person to be good at everything all the time.” Without fail, there will be a feeling of dejection in the room.

“OK,” I say, “now let’s try something a little different.” I turn over to a new page and write the following question: “As a parent (teacher) what do I value?” And I write down the words people offer: “compassion,” “trust,” “creativity,” “nature,” “learning,” “family time,” “celebration,” “extended family” and so on. Not only are the words different than the ones used to

answer the first question (some words do appear on both), but the group’s responses to the different lists is very, very different.

People seem surprised as they share that they feel “energized,” “inspired,” “not alone,” “amazed” by the words on the second list.

Sometimes I will add words to the second list if they don’t get called out because I suspect most of our children would want to see words up there like “fun,” “humour,” “recreation,” “time together,” and “respect.”

When we try to be the kind of parent we think we should be, we are working with an external definition that may or may not connect with who we actually are. The bar is set high so we will fail.

But when we talk about what we value as parents, we’re talking about what’s important to us, what we care about. There is no bar. There is no “right” or “wrong.”

I see participants get excited, energized, and inspired.

Once we’re clear about our values, it’s easy to create a vision for ourselves and for our families; one that is sustainable, one that we can revisit, one that is free of the “shoulds” which weigh us down and deflate us.

When our boys were small, my husband Jim and I valued family time and trips to visit extended family. That made it easy to limit spending money on “things.” We shopped second-hand and bought thoughtful but not expensive birthday and Christmas presents for each other. We also made gifts and regifted presents because we always had more than we needed. And when our sons whined about not being able to get something, we could say, “We are saving our money to visit Gramma and Grampa.” Imagining the time in Florida with their cousins and grandparents was usually enough to refocus their attention. They loved time with their extended family. They still do to this day!

Families value different things. That’s all we have to say to our children. We don’t have to make people “right” or “wrong.”

We might want to honestly say how we feel when people don’t value something in the way we do. Slamming others doesn’t help our children. Knowing how we feel about something, does.

To know us, our children need to know what it is we value. What passions draw us www.kidsinvictoria.com

forward and bring out the best in us? They want to know what we don’t value, where we are not interested in devoting our time and energy, and why that is so. They notice whether what we say matches up with our actions and choices.

My friend Cam had a lucrative but soulcrushing job. He dreamt about buying and running a bookstore and having more time with his family. But being the responsible guy he was, he stuck to his job and steady income. One day Cam was speaking with one of his sons about the importance of doing something you love as a career. His son interrupted and his response struck to the heart. “But Dad, you’re not doing that!”

Those words were part of the push Cam and his wife needed. They decided to risk and go for their dream. Not only has the decision been good for Cam and his family, it’s been good for our community because now we have a wonderful bookstore. And I have an amazing new friend who hosts the writing group I’m part of!

When we live with an awareness of what we value, we can more quickly identify when we’re off track. Our unhappiness, frustrations, and tensions don’t seem random, they’re rooted in the distance between our actions and our values. We can figure

out how to correct the misalignment, just as Cam did. I’m not saying it doesn’t take courage sometimes, but we have a process for assessing our lives and choices.

Try this quick exercise. Pose these two questions to yourself: “What do I value?” followed by, “Where am I spending my time, energy and money?” If there’s not alignment between the two, you might feel what have been described as “soul blisters,” a painful feeling that’s meant to wake you up so you can choose differently and get aligned to your values.

Our children long to feel the roots, creativity, and energy of being part of a family living out its values, but our culture is bereft of values. I have some anxiety using this term “values” when it has been used to further a political career/party, or to sell a product.

But hopefully, it’s clear that I’m not talking about “family values” in an external way to describe what I think a parent should believe or how they should act.

Rather, I’m talking about getting clear about what it is that you value as a parent so that your choices can flow naturally from this clarity. This clarity will serve your children who are bombarded by the “values” of a consumer culture that sees people solely for their ability to consume and/or produce.

Your clarity will give them the ability to look beyond superficial things and navigate with a deeper, stronger rudder; clearly knowing what they value as true and important. A rudder that will not only serve them personally, but will serve their community, their world, this planet we call home.

How do you treat people in your own home, how do you treat possessions, how do you live with others?

These are the big questions. The answers are rooted in a deep knowing of what is important to you. The answers are not rooted in any product, service, experience, or even parenting book. Yes, all these things can help you live out your values, but the crucial thing is to know what your values are, articulate them for yourselves as a family, and start making choices based on those values. Then the overload of options, choices, products, services, adventures, opportunities can be filtered through your values, thereby making them much more manageable.

Selinde Krayenhoff is the cofounder of Island Parent Magazine, a community worker, writer, workshop facilitator and keynote speaker on topics covering parenting, spirituality and mid-life transition. Visit her blog at selindek.wordpress.com.

Birds Up Close

Flying daily March – October www.the-raptors.com 1877 Herd Rd. Duncan BC 250-746-0372 www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013 43

Children’s Programs

Our children’s programs are designed to encourage children to explore their imaginations while learning the craft of acting in a safe, nurturing, fun environment. Through improvisation, movement, voice and scene work, young actors gain confidence, self esteem and stronger communication skills as they work together on expression and characterization.

Let your kids We offer OUT Classes, ACT Audition Workshops, this Summer!

Spring Break &three Summer We offer the following camps: All camps 10:00am–3:30pm Camps for kids ages 7-15.

The Actor’s Toolbox

Aug 5–9 (Ages 9–12) Please our website Cost: visit $218.40 (Includes GST) Participants will be introduced to the actor’s process for contact information, of developing a character for performance. Using scripts from established playwrights, participants will registration and dates: explore a variety of methods used by professional actors to bring a script to life – all within a fun and supportive environment. The final class will include a presentation of the week’s work.

www.vadarts.com Performance Creation info@vadarts.com Aug 12–16 (Ages 13–15)

250.580.2588

Cost: $218.40 (Includes GST) This course will introduce participants to a variety of tools used for the creation of an original performance. Working from a single point of inspiration, participants will collectively explore the roles of playwrights, actors, designers, and directors as they devise their own original new work. As an ensemble, participants will explore and develop their own unique creative voice.

Page to Stage Aug 19–23 (Ages 6–8)

Cost: $218.40 (Includes GST) This class will give kids the opportunity to bring a popular children’s story to life. Participants will explore character and story through movement, voice, and improvisation. At the end of the week, the students will perform an original staging of their chosen book – taking the story from the page to the stage.

Register online or by email

We offer Classes, www.vadarts.com

apply@vadarts.com Audition Workshops, Spring Break & Summer 44 Island Parent Magazine Camps for kids ages 7-15.

Growing Up Bilingual L

anguage mixing—using elements from two languages in the same sentence—is frequent among bilingual parents and could pose a challenge for vocabulary acquisition by one- and two-year-old children, according to a new study by Concordia University psychology professor Krista Byers-Heinlein.

Vocabulary acquisition problems are likely temporary, however, and are often counterbalanced by cognitive advantages afforded to children raised in a bilingual environment.

How do bilingual parents use their two languages when interacting with their young children? Until recently, little has been known about how often parents switch between languages when interacting with their toddlers, and whether such exposure to language mixing influences vocabulary size.

To find the answers, Byers-Heinlein collaborated with Dr. Janet Werker’s Infant Studies Centre in Vancouver. She recruited 181 bilingual parents who spoke English as well as another language, and examined how often and in what situations they mixed languages while speaking with their children.

Each parent had a one- or two-year-old child being raised bilingually or trilingually, having heard English and one or two other languages regularly since birth.

Rather than being a rare phenomenon, the results showed that language mixing is common in interactions between bilingual parents and their children. Indeed, 90 per cent of parents reported mixing their languages in interactions with their children. Parents did not mix their languages haphazardly, however, but instead reported principled reasons for mixing. For example, they borrowed words from the other language when there was no adequate translation, when they were not sure of a word, and when the word was hard to pronounce. Parents also reported frequently borrowing words from one language when teaching new words to their children in the other. Thus, bilingual parents might use language mixing as a strategy to make sure their children learn words equally in both languages.

Byers-Heinlein then examined the vocabulary size of 168 children whose parents had responded to the study. All of the children were learning English, but their non-English language varied widely—from German to Japanese, French to Farsi. As such, she focused on children’s English vocabulary

size, while statistically controlling for the words that children likely knew in their non-English language.

She found that exposure to parental language mixing predicted significantly smaller comprehension vocabularies (words understood) in the younger children, and marginally smaller production vocabularies (words spoken) in the older children.

Why is that? Byers-Heinlein explains that, “high rates of language mixing make it harder for children to categorize words they hear. That could lead to slower word learning and smaller vocabularies. It also seems that it’s more difficult to learn a word from a mixed-language sentence than from a single-language sentence.”

…Exposure to parental language mixing predicted significantly smaller comprehension vocabularies (words understood) in younger children, and marginally smaller production vocabularies (words spoken) in older children.

But that doesn’t mean children raised in a bilingual environment are at a disadvantage. Byers-Heinlein cautions that, “even if exposure to language mixing is initially challenging for vocabulary acquisition, it likely has benefits over the long term.”

Studies comparing monolingual and bilingual infants have shown that bilinguals are more adept at switching between strategies and are more able to learn two rules at the same time, she explains. “Infants exposed to frequent language mixing could develop specific strategies for coping with this type of input. That could lead to cognitive advantages that would outweigh any initial difficulties brought about by language mixing.”

For more information, visit the Centre for Research in Human Development at crdh. concordia.ca/homee.html. www.kidsinvictoria.com

Emily Perl Kingsley

Welcome to Holland

I

am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability—to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It’s like this…

When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip—to Italy.

You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Colosseum. Michelangelo’s David. The gondolas in Venice.

You may learn some handy phrases in Italian.

It’s all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands.

The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome To Holland.”

“Holland?!” you say. “What do you mean ‘Holland’? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.”

But there’s been a change in the flight plan.

They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It’s just a different place.

So you must go and buy new guide books.

And you must learn a whole new language.

And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It’s just a different place. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around…and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills…Holland has tulips…Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy…and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there.

And for the rest of your life, you will say “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned.”

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away…because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.

But…if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things…about Holland.

Written by Emily Perl Kingsley, © 1987.

Reprinted with permission.

www.IslandParent.ca

& The place online where parents and grandparents get information about their community for their family: Read current and past issues of Island Parent Magazine.

Visit our Marketplace to find businesses, programs and services that cater to the little person in your life.

Looking for that special something you had when you were a kid? Check out our classified ads.

Want to see what’s up today or this weekend?

View our calendar of events.

Whether it’s dance lessons, parenting workshops, fun days and festivals, what’s happening at your local rec centre or community events—Kids In Victoria has it all!

Maybe you are looking for something to engage your mind or perhaps need a little bit of advice. Well we have that too on our community forum.

Receive Island Parent & Kids In Victoria e-newsletter for updates and exclusive contests.

You can also enter our monthly and photo contests.

Come be part of our community at

www.kidsinvictoria.com

May 2013 45

Child, Youth & Family Community Health South Island Health Units Esquimalt 250-519-5311 Gulf Islands 250-539-3099 (toll-free number for office in Saanichton)

Peninsula 250-544-2400 Saanich 250-519-5100 Saltspring Island 250-538-4880 Sooke 250-642-5464 Victoria 250-388-2200 West Shore 250-519-3490

Central Island Health Units Duncan 250-709-3050 Ladysmith 250-755-3342 Lake Cowichan 250-749-6878 Nanaimo 250-755-3342 Nanaimo Princess Royal 250-755-3342 Parksville/Qualicum 250-947-8242 Port Alberni 250-731-1315 Tofino 250-725-4020

North Island Health Units Campbell River 250-850-2110 Courtenay 250-331-8520 Kyuquot Health Ctr 250-332-5289 ‘Namgis Health Ctr 250-974-5522 Port Hardy 250-902-6071

www.viha.ca/prevention_services/

46 Island Parent Magazine

5 Tech-Free Ways to Promote Early Speech & Language

W

ith technology a part of our everyday lives, parents of children under five often find themselves using the latest device or learning software to give their children an educational edge. We all know how easy it is for children to be captivated by technology. However, while the latest gadgets can have educational benefits for children’s speech and language development, they are most effective when used together with adult interaction. It is this engagement with another person that is critical for a rich learning experience.

From a speech-language pathologist’s perspective, the most effective way to help children learn how to communicate is through interaction with others. In fact, some of our simplest interactions make the greatest impact on a child who is learning to communicate. These everyday exchanges benefit all children, including those who have or are at risk of speech/language delays.

Having the latest technology isn’t necessary for speech and language development.

Here are some practical ways you can stimulate your child’s speech and language development without the aid of technology.

1. Introduce new words to your child at mealtime by repeating words and phrases.

For example, you might ask “Want more?

More?” and when offering more say “Here’s more! More crackers. More, more, more.” A child may be able to understand longer sentences but will still need short, simple, and repetitive information to learn to talk. You might find repetition boring, but children, especially those having difficulty learning language, need to hear words many times before they learn the meaning of words and are able to speak those words themselves. It’s natural to name objects for your child, such as banana or spoon, but children will need a variety of words to communicate fully, so consider repeating words for actions (eat, drink, squish…), feelings (hungry, happy, sad…), belonging (mine, yours, Daddy’s…), describing (sticky, hot, cold…), social interactions (hello, please, thank you…), or locations (in, on, under…).

2. Use the opportunity while facing your baby at a change table to match your baby’s sounds and noises. If your baby says “ah-ba-ba-ba” you can repeat back “ah-ba-ba-ba.” Enjoy sharing a back-andforth conversation this way, remembering to pause after your turn to allow your baby a turn to “talk” (for example, making a face,

Healthy Families; Happy Families C hild Y outh & Family C ommunity Health

CARRIE COLLINS

a sound, or an action). Continue to act as if you’re having a real conversation, making eye contact, waiting for your child to finish before starting your turn, and matching your length of turn to your child’s. You can keep the conversation going by changing the pitch of your voice or adding a new sound into the mix (“ah-ma-ma-ma”). Your baby may or may not copy you, but you’ve likely sparked interest and helped your baby attend to your voice, teaching him that talking means sharing messages back and forth.

3. It’s normal for young children to make speech sound errors while they are learning to speak clearly. In your own speech, you can try lengthening and strengthening a sound your child is learning to say as a way to help your child tune in and notice the sound. The next time you’re in a waiting room with your child, emphasize a sound clearly while you talk about pictures in a magazine or book.

For example, if your child struggles to say the “s” sound clearly, you might say “What do you ssssssee on thisssss page? I ssssssee yummy ssssstrawberries.” If your child says “I wike tawbewies,” you don’t need to ask your child to correct their speech. Continue to highlight the sound by repeating it back correctly, as in “I like ssssstrawberries too!”

4. While on a walk, repeat what your child says and add a word or two. For a child who communicates with single words and says “Wet,” you could respond with “Yes, www.kidsinvictoria.com

Oak and Orca Bioregional School

le sa

• ready-set-learn

y mar -pri ol e r P o Sch

t ly auc ion • bo ok

se a

children’s games • bake sale • sun spotting •

ed rad Ung hool Sc

nd

• Free Family Event • • Educational Workshops • • Children’s Activities • • Ready-Set-Learn Event •

mer Sum ram g Pro

H Hom ands-O n e-L ear ning

rie

www.IslandParent.ca

Sunday May 26th 11am-3pm

250 383 6609 http://oakandorca.ca

workshops • Aikido demonstration • local/ec of

Carrie Collins is a registered Speech and Language Pathologist working with preschool children at the Saanich Health Unit of the Vancouver Island Health Authority.

Annual Bioregional Fair

s • face painting •

imagination! Join in by copying your child’s actions. That may mean pushing cars if your child is pushing cars. Gradually add to the play scenario by modeling more advanced actions or ideas. For example, you might pretend your car is flying or suggest all the cars go for a pretend swim. In the same way, for a child who is already imagining more elaborate scenarios, you might use comments and questions to extend the scenario even further. For example, “We finished feeding the animals. Do they need to get ready for bed? Let’s get their pyjamas!”

Playing with children stimulates their learning and talking. In fact, by helping children learn how to pretend an object or action is something else (a symbol), you help them learn language.

Above all else, enjoy having fun together!

Yes, tablet games, educational software, and DVDs are captivating, but don’t underestimate the power of sharing simple interactions and joys in everyday experiences. It’s in everyday social exchanges where meaningful communication takes place and children learn to become successful communicators.

May is Speech and Hearing Awareness Month. Speech, language and hearing resources for all ages can be found by selecting “Consumer Info” at www.speechandhearing.ca.

• ch

af t

Yes, tablet games, educational software, and DVDs are captivating, but don’t underestimate the power of sharing simple interactions and joys in everyday experiences

r es atu e cr

cr

wet puddle,” “It’s wet,” “Wet shoes” or “You’re wet!” depending on the context.

Similarly, if your child speaks in phrases, such as “That doggie,” you might respond by adding “That doggie’s running,” “That’s a big doggie,” or “That doggie’s fast.” By taking what your child says and extending it a small step further you help your child learn how to communicate ideas beyond what they are already expressing.

5. Join your child in their world of play.

You don’t need “educational” toys—just

COMPREHENSIVE FAMILY DENTISTRY family centered practice extended hours evenings and weekends the latest equipment and caring staff request an appointment online

saanichdentalgroup.com 119–1591 McKenzie Ave, Victoria

250 477 7321

info@saanichdentalgroup.com May 2013

47

YMCA-YWCA Greater Victoria

Day Camtpion Registra !!!

ON NOW

VOTED BEST CAMP FOR KIDS - BLACK PRESS READERS

For More Information:

WWW.VICTORIAY.COM

JOB #Y100-14517 CLIENT: YMCA-YWCA GREATER VICTORIA PUBLICATION: ISLAND PARENT SHIPPING DATE: APRIL 22, 2013 SIZE: 4.75" X 2.125" PREPARED BY: ECLIPSE CREATIVE INC. @ 250-382-1103

Luxton Pro Rodeo May 18, 19 & 20

Champion Cowboys, Specialty Acts & More!!!

Dance: Luxton Hall, Sat 9pm, $18. Band: Montgomery County Rodeo Events start 2pm daily. Admission tickets at gate.

Adults $20 (14 and under free with adult).

OAP & Students $15 (up to 18 yrs). All prices include GST. Free Grounds Admission (Opens 12 noon daily) To: Vendors, Blacksmith, Antique Farm Equipment & Heritage Displays; Carnival Midway Rides (opens Fri 3pm; Sat, Sun, Mon 1pm)

Parking by donation – Hwy #14, Corner of Sooke & Luxton Rd, 12 miles from Victoria http://members.shaw.ca/luxtonrodeo/ Info: 250-478-4250

“If a doula were a drug, it would be UNETHICAL not to use it.”

- John H. Kennell, MD

www.glowingtouch.ca Come See Why Learning in Nature Rocks!

Opening Spring 2013 for Ages 3–5 "Tell me and I'll forget, show me and I may remember, involve me and I'll understand" Chinese Proverb Reggio Influenced Philosophy Child Led Learning Registrations Now Being Taken for Limited Spaces

mosnjk@hotmail.com www.naturejuniorkindergarten.com 48 Island Parent Magazine

Random Moments

S

o there I am, beginning a new day, brushing my eldest’s teeth, wondering yet again what exactly the toothpaste people mean when they say “pea-sized dab,” wondering yet again if fluoride is the greatest thing ever for our kids’ teeth or the worst thing ever for our kids’ teeth (I have no idea, people tell me both. If anyone knows, get in touch…actually, no, don’t. Don’t ever talk to me about fluoride again, I don’t care anymore), wondering when exactly toothpaste concerns became so incredibly heated and life-or-death important.

Then I stop thinking about that and, as my youngest throws a banshee-esque tantrum in the other room, I think of an unrecognized example of literary genius in Richard Price’s 1974 novel The Wanderers.

At the very end of this great coming-of-age story, the protagonist is sitting on a bench in a crowded playground, with the sounds of screaming kids all around him. He places his hands over his ears, desperately trying to block out the sound, yet choosing to not just get up and sit somewhere else.

This leads me to start thinking about my own kids, and what it will be like when they come of age. I mean, being a dad is a wild ride, isn’t it? And just imagine—if you’re not already hurtling down the tracks—what it will be like when your little ones have those moments in late teenagehood where the world starts making sense, where reality hits. Realistically, parents have nothing to do with those moments—as it should be—but I still like to imagine I’ll be there to help out my little ones.

Still brushing my kid’s teeth, this, inexplicably, leads me to think about ZZ Top. For this, I can offer no explanation. I also offer no apology. Turning to my daughter, I start maniacally humming the riff to a classic ZZ Top tune, more for my own enjoyment than hers. For some reason this angers her.

She tells me to stop and that I “stink like raw zucchini.” It’s unclear if she’s serious or not. I tone it down a bit, but keep humming

www.kidsinvictoria.com

the tune; how can you stop a ZZ Top song once you start? You can’t.

Cut to later that day. It’s the weekend, the wife is at work, I’ve got both rugrats under my care, and I’ve just spent 45 minutes waiting for an appointment which I now realize is actually scheduled for next week.

Flustered, I get them back home and toss the youngest into his crib, praying that he’ll fall asleep fast enough to get a good nap in before we race out the door for his sister’s violin lesson. Out of the corner of my eye, I

Glenlyon Norfolk School Marine Adventure Program Teen Marine Kayak Camps – Summer 2013 Ph 250-370-6852 Email dtyrrell@mygns.ca Day Camps: July 22–26, Aug 12–16

These popular camps (9:00–4:30) for children ages 11 to 12 cover all the basics in sea kayaking, with plenty of fun for the younger paddler. Cost: $255.00

Teen Barkley Sound: June 30–July 5 Teen Johnstone Strait: Aug 18–23 Two exciting sea kayak camping expeditions for teens ages 15–17.

Cost: $625.00 + tax

Discovery Camps: July 8–12, Aug 5–9

For ages 13 to 14, sea kayaking basics, rescues, games, and a three-day camping experience on Discovery Island.

Cost: $285.00 + tax

Dadspeak GREG PRATT

Offering marine adventure since 1995!

see that I haven’t done the dishes yet today and I gotta get those suckers done quick because we need to eat lunch and then paint Easter eggs later and, then, a request rolls in: “Daddy? Can you cut out some hearts for me from this paper?”

Okay, stop. This, you’re thinking, is the moment where the frazzled dad realizes he’s worrying too much about irrelevant problems, and the innocence in his daughter’s eyes makes him smile and take a deep breath and enjoy the little things in life. Right?

Of course not. I panick.

Look, I’m 36 years old. I’m a man. Cutting out little hearts from pieces of paper with child-size scissors, even with my daughter, is just not something I excel at. So I try, and my “heart” looks more like the symbol for some death cult, all triangular and symmetrical and intense. I offer it to my daughter, my hand twitching just a bit as I hold it out to her.

She stares at me.

A pea sitting on top of a toothbrush, an image from a classic novel, children coming of age, a ZZ Top tune, paper hearts gone tragically awry.

All random moments making up just one typical day in the life of a dad, a life that even at the most frustrating and baffling of times, I’d trade for nothing.

Greg Pratt is the father of two children and a local journalist and editor. His writing has appeared in, among other places, Today’s Parent, Wired, Revolver and Douglas.

Sunday, May 26th at 11am Beacon Hill Park - Cameron Bandshell Register and raise funds at: worldpartnershipwalk.com/victoria www.facebook.com/wpwalk Thank you to Island Parent Magazine for your support.

www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013 49

Cooking, for Everyday Use

It is a matter of measuring, timing, and plain and simple practice. Enjoy!

or what do we require food? For two chief purposes, viz.:—to produce and maintain the various tissues of the body while fulfilling their respective vital functions; and to generate heat, without which life would cease. For these ends different forms of food are required.”

Meet The Blue Ribbon Cookbook, For Everyday Use in Western Homes, the 1905 edition, from my Granny Barker’s library. I am obsessed. The book is a basic how-to, a primer written to instruct on and de-mystify kitchen activities. The book’s basic, matterof-fact language (think Professor McGonagall—brisk, kind, and not a whiff of nonsense) reinforces, without any pretension at all, that any and everyone can cook. And one gets the feeling, without guilt or pressure, that any and everyone should cook. There are rules to follow, of course, as in any harmoniously run universe (or household). “Divided recipes fail because they are not accurately divided.” “All vegetables, with the exception of potatoes, should be cooked in uncovered vessels.” “All pastry should be baked in a hot oven.” When these, and similar, precepts are recognized

2 cups frozen peas 1 avocado 3 Tbsp raw pistachios, shelled 1⁄4 cup fresh mint, roughly chopped 1⁄3 cup light vegetable oil (such as canola or grapeseed) 2 Tbsp lemon juice 1 Tbsp cider vinegar 1 tsp lemon zest 1 Tbsp honey dash hot sauce, if desired salt and pepper, to taste Cook peas according to package directions.

Drain; set aside in medium-sized bowl to cool.

Halve avocado, remove pit, and cut into 1⁄2-inch squares. Add avocado, pistachio nuts, and mint to peas. Toss well to combine. In small bowl, combine oil, lemon juice, vinegar, honey, lemon zest, hot sauce and salt and pepper. Whisk well.

Drizzle dressing over pea mixture and serve, either chilled or at room temperature.

F

and accepted, well-prepared meals result. The book tells readers about the amount of food required (circumstances of the individual life must be taken into account: most practical), food required for professional people, for laboring men (pre-political correctness), for the corpulent, the lean, and the young among us.

The overall dictate is common sense—using a lot of energy? Well, then, you’d best take in a bit more fuel! How refreshing to see cooking and food treated neither as a trendy hobby nor as a science experiment, but rather as a natural part of everyday life.

Cooking is not everyone’s idea of a good time, however, and 2013 has some freedoms associated with household chores that 1905 didn’t have. We don’t have to do it, but I believe that it is important for all of us to know that we could, if need be. After some time spent in the kitchen, we learn that some things are musts (baking powder) and some are more optional (spices), and we can begin to exercise a bit of flair with our cooking. It’s not a gift: at birth we’re not randomly either good cooks or Muggles. Cooking involves no miracles, no magic, no Bibbity-Bobbity-Boo.

Sabrina

Peas with Avocado

Fruit Crumble 4 cups assorted mixed fruit (fresh or frozen blueberries, raspberries, blackberries, mixed with chopped fresh fruit)

Rebecca

future Minister of the Environment

future commercial pilot

Girl Greatness Starts Here!

Triptych_7.125x2.125.indd 1

going to make difference a in the world

great

1-800-565-8111 girlguides.ca 5/26/2011 8:57:10 AM

Oaklands Community Centre 2827 Belmont Ave.

This year’s Fling will also have our Spring Plant Sale attached. Lots of beautiful flowering plants and productive herbs and berry bushes available for sale.

The silent auction will be a feature as well. Lots of great stuff to bid on. Great deals and a great way to support Lansdowne Preschool.

ily s tion

ntre,

y 4th

G G

50 Island Parent Magazine

ell. Lots of great way

th

pring Plant ring plants s available

11 -2 Saturday May 4 pm

BBQ lunch will be available for purchase at amazingly good prices!

rchase at

FLING

Come on out to the Lansdowne Preschool Spring Fling. $5 per family entrance fee will get you access to the Bouncy castle, as well as some tickets for the games.

ool Spring you access tickets for

SPRING am

Isabella

www.kidsinvictoria.com

1⁄3 cup granulated sugar 3 tsp cinnamon 3 Tbsp flour 3⁄4 cup rolled oats

Just Eat It! KATHY HUMPHREY 1⁄4

cup flour cup brown sugar dash nutmeg 1 tsp cinnamon 1⁄4–1⁄3 cup butter In large bowl, combine fruit with sugar, cinnamon and flour. Mix well. Let sit for half an hour to draw the juices from the fruit. In separate bowl, combine oats, flour, nutmeg and cinnamon. Rub in butter until all ingredients clump together, adding more if needed. Preheat oven to 350˚F. Spoon fruit mixture into shallow baking dish and sprinkle with crumble topping. Bake for 30–45 minutes, until top is golden and crumble is bubbling around the edges. Serve with whipped cream, ice cream, yogurt or frozen yogurt.

1⁄3

If you have kids… and you like camping… try Park Sands Beach Resort this summer!

3 cups broccoli florets 3 stalks red or green kale 1⁄2 cup oil-packed sundried tomatoes, gently squeeze-dried 1⁄4 cup sunflower seeds 1⁄4 cup red onion, chopped 3⁄4 cup mayonnaise 1 tsp paprika 1 tsp mustard powder 1–2 tsp sugar 1 tsp cider vinegar salt and pepper, to taste Whisk together mayonnaise, vinegar, paprika, mustard, sugar, and salt and pepper. Taste; adjust if necessary. Set aside. Wash broccoli and separate florets into small, bite-sized pieces.

Rinse kale, cut leaves finely, discarding tough stalk portions. Toast sunflower seeds in small skillet over medium heat, tossing frequently to avoid burning, until fragrant and golden. Cool.

Finely chop onion and tomatoes. Mix together broccoli, kale, tomatoes, and sunflower seeds.

Drizzle dressing over top. Stir well. Allow to sit for at least one hour before serving.

Kathy Humphrey lives in Victoria with her husband and two children. She tries to see cooking for a family not as a chore but as a creative outlet.

www.IslandParent.ca

2013

Broccoli Salad

RV PARK & CAMPGROUND

A quiet, family place – on the beach – in Parksville.

www.parksands.com 1.877.873.1600

VCM Summer Academy

Music

Discovery Camp July 15-19 & 22-26

900 Johnson St. Victoria, BC 250 386 5311

A fun musical adventure for kids age 5-13!

Emily Nagelbach, Artistic Director

Register Today! vcm.bc.ca/music-discovery May 2013

51

Register online at

The P

VikesCamps.com

er of w o

or call 250.472.4000 for more information

Basketball Cross Country Dance Field Hockey Girl Power Hockey Mini Vikes (full and half day)

Multi Sport Racquet Sports Rugby (Girls) Run Jump Throw Soccer Speed & Agility Swimming Tennis Track & Field Vikes Adventurers Vikes Summer Fun Volleyball Water Polo Youth Leadership Development

Play

2013 Summer Camps

Before and after care is available.

Accepting Enrollment for Sept. 2013 Book now for a tour!

5575 West Saanich Rd (across from Red Barn Market) 250 592 4411 imhs@telus.net www.islandmontessori.com

•

preschool to grade 2

•

before and after school care

•

small class sizes

•

supportive and caring staff

•

excellent academic foundation

•

Kodaly music program

•

lovely rural location connecting children to nature

Don’t miss this rare opportunity!

Sp ace s av ail able for Ki n de rg arte n & Grade 8 September 2013

Christ Church Cathedral School

912 Vancouver Street | 250-383-5125 cathedralschool@cathedralschool.ca | www.cathedralschool.ca

52 Island Parent Magazine

To Sleep, Perchance to Dream

G

eorge Bernard Shaw famously said that “Youth is wasted on the young.” I see his point, but I think he is slightly off the mark. Kids enjoy the exuberance of youth, the energy of it. Youth isn’t wasted on them.

What they really don’t appreciate is sleep.

I know this was true for me, in my Life Before Kids. Oh, the weekend mornings I frittered away, blithely sleeping past 8:00 a.m., without even an inkling of gratitude!

In those days, sleep was a guaranteed luxury.

Back then, I didn’t find myself dreaming about sleeping.

When the kids came along, I thought I was prepared to lose a little sleep. I read the books. I paid attention to the advice doled out to me by strangers in line at the grocery store checkout. But this collective wisdom proved useless to me. You see, I have not been blessed with those mythical creatures, the fabled “good sleepers.” To my three, it seems that sleep is some kind of torture, akin to being forced to scrub toilets, or to eat liver and onions for breakfast.

I’ve done my best to show the kids the benefits of sleeping. Those books were put to the test, over the years, as we tried every tactic and then some. Swaddled sleeping vs. unswaddled sleeping. Scheduled sleeping vs. baby-led sleeping. Music before bed didn’t work, but neither did quiet before bed. We tried gentle tactics, stringent tactics, and comedy routines. We tried putting the crib in our room, then putting the crib in the nursery…and one sleep-deprived night, hubby and I found ourselves bedding down on the living room floor, allowing our restless infant the peace and quiet he deserved in the master suite. Despite this arsenal of varied strategies, all three babes seemed allergic to sleep.

It didn’t let up once they entered toddlerhood—but it did get more interesting. There was a particularly memorable phase when our eldest, then two, decided to wean herself off sleep. For reasons as yet unexplained, she invented a new routine: www.kidsinvictoria.com

Stand in bed, screaming as loud as possible; After 45 minutes, succumb to exhaustion—fall asleep with cheek resting on side of crib; Fall down—due to being asleep—and in the process, wake self up; Scramble to standing position, resume screaming; Repeat as necessary until parents are driven to tears.

This went on day and night for several weeks, leaving me so tired and frustrated

Is There an App for This?

SARAH MILLIGAN

Gliders & for Ideal Furniture everyday Evolving adventures.

With Your Family Needs

For All Your Your Baby Baby Needs…

Needs… New, We Also Do&Rentals!

For Used Rentals Serving the Infants • Toddlers • Youth • Parents & Grandparents of Victoria

The Kiddies Store

s St.

3045–C Douglas St. (Rear) 386-2229 www.tjskids.com

Finlayson St. Dougla

that I once climbed into the crib, eight months pregnant, in an attempt to get her to lie down and go to sleep. It didn’t work, but I can tell you that Storkcraft cribs are admirably sturdy.

Preschool years have led us deep into the wilds of bedwetting and sleepwalking.

The older children now collaborate on epic and complex stalling strategies. We play bedroom roulette, still under the illusion that everyone will sleep well once we find the perfect layout of the right kid in the right bed in the right room. If we get through a night without scary dreams, itchy elbows, or Tylenol, we are content. In short, our standards for a “good night’s sleep” have lowered considerably…dropped through the floor, in fact.

Every day, I puzzle over this battle. Sleep is wonderful. I’d like to be asleep right now.

In these years when they can sleep whenever they want, why must they fight it so? But when I watch them tearing through the day, it’s obvious: they fight sleep because they’ve got so much living to do. Sleeping means missing out, and they don’t want to bypass a moment in this amazing world. From that perspective, my choice is clear—I’d rather watch their vibrant lives than I would sleep. And so I’ve made my peace with it.

I’ll sleep one day. Or maybe I won’t. In the meantime, there is excitement enough to keep me awake. And there is always coffee.

MOTION™ STROLLER

Larch St.

T.J.’S

(Under Sleep Country in the REAR)

Sarah Milligan writes at www.findingabundance.com. Please stop by and say hello!

www.IslandParent.ca

May 2013

53

Family Services Directory This directory, sponsored by Thrifty Foods, features not for profit agencies and organizations serving children, youth and families.

BC Families in Transition (formerly the Separation and Divorce Resource Centre) is one of three non-profit agencies in North America that offers professional counselling, legal support and education for people who are having problems in their relationships. Each year we help 10,000 adults, children and youth through family changes, separations and divorces, remarriages, and complex family situations. Whether you wish to separate or remain together, call us at 250-386-4331 or visit www.bcfit.org to see how we can help. Some evening and weekend appointments available.

Beacon Community Services is a community-based non-profit agency providing social, employment, and health services to Saanich Peninsula, Greater Victoria, and Southern Gulf Islands residents. Beacon offers: child, youth, and family services; a drop-in family resource centre; counselling; employment services for adults, youth, and people with disabilities; home support; volunteer services and opportunities; community events; affordable assisted living for seniors; referrals, information, and resources; thrift shops. For Home Support information call 250-658-6407; for all other inquiries call 250-656-0134, or visit www.beaconcs.ca.

Big Brothers Big Sisters of Victoria is a non-profit organization that provides mentoring programs for children and youth between the ages of 7 - 17. Adult volunteers (“Bigs”) are matched with children (“Littles”) based on shared interests, respect and trust. No special skills or experience are needed to be a mentor to a child, just a willingness to be a friend and commit to being a

TM

consistent, positive adult role model. Make a BIG difference in the life of a child in as little as 1 hr./ week. Contact us at 250-475-1117 or visit www. bbbsvictoria.com or ‘LIKE’ our page at facebook. com/bbbsvictoria.

Boys & Girls Club Services offer after-school and evening social, educational and recreational programming for children and youth at 4 locations.

We also offer support to parents (Parents Together) and programs at our Outdoor Centre in Metchosin.

For more information on all programs and services visit www.bgcvic.org or call 250.384.9133.

The Child Abuse Prevention & Counselling Society/Mary Manning Centre is the primary provider of therapy and victim support services for children and youth in Greater Victoria who experience sexual abuse, physical abuse, and other serious trauma, or who may be at risk for sexual abuse. Therapy services include individual and group sessions for children and youth and group sessions for parents. Victim services include intake and referral, accompaniment and support for children and youth being interviewed by police, and court preparation and support for those testifying as victims or witnesses in criminal cases. No charge for clients. Contact: 250-385-6111 or admin@ marymanning.com.

Community Living Victoria supports people with developmental disabilities and their families by providing residential services, day and community supports (supported employment, parent support and independent living). Our Host agency provides direct supports for those with Individualized Fund-

ing and Home Share service. We also provide Autism Services for youth between 13 and 19. Our family support program offers advocacy, conflict resolution, education, newsletters, workshops, support groups and a resource library. Please call 250-477-7231 ext 233.

Esquimalt Neighbourhood House Society. Our Family Services offer family resource programs with a focus on early childhood development and learning, parenting education and pre and post-natal services. Our Counselling Services are free to adults and youth (12-18 years); adult and short term clinical counselling is offered for acute mental health problems. For more information call 250-385-2635 or visit 511 Constance Ave. in Esquimalt.

Inter-Cultural Association of Greater Victoria (ICA) is a service agency for immigrants and refugees. Programs offered include cross-cultural counseling, parenting programs (child care available), family violence programs, employment services, interpretation and translation, diversity workshops and training, ESL instruction, volunteering, youth programs and tutoring, as well as intercultural arts programming and the Diversity Health Fair. 930 Balmoral Rd, 250-388-4728, info@icavictoria.org, www.icavictoria.org.

Learning Disabilities Association of BC, SVI Chapter, educates, supports and advocates for children and youth with learning disabilities and related conditions.

Services include a public lending library, individual/ group support for parents and children, professional/educational workshops for parents and professionals. Child and youth programs include: reading/writing, academic skills, social/emotional skill development and Fast ForWord. 1562 Fort Street, Victoria, BC V8S 5J2. Ph 250.370.9513.

Fax. 250.370.9421. www.ldasvi.bc.ca. www. knowyourrights.ca

Writing for Island Parent Many of the articles in Island Parent are written by people just like you: parents who want to share their experiences, knowledge or ideas with other parents. We’re always happy to consider your submission, whether you’re a published writer or not. If you’re itching to express yourself but need a few pointers or a friendly nudge, come out for an evening of inspiration.

We’re holding a Writing for Island Parent workshop on Tuesday, May 7th, 7–9pm, at 830 Pembroke St, Ste B (across from the north side of Save On Foods Memorial Arena). Space is limited. If you’d like to attend, please e-mail Sue Fast at editor@islandparent.ca.

Come on out and get those creative juices flowing!

54 Island Parent Magazine

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Military Family Resource Centre (MFRC) provides programs and services to the military family community. Services include: 24 Hour Information Line, Deployment Information and Workshops, Short Term Intervention/Crisis Support, Welcome/ Relocation Services, services for families with special needs and responsibilities and childcare services and support to parents. Exciting Volunteer opportunities available! Call the MFRC: 250-3632640 (1-800-353-3329) for information. www. esquimaltmfrc.com.

Parent Support Services Society (www. parentsupportbc.ca) provides support circles, parenting resources and referrals to all in a parenting role including grandparents raising grandchildren.

Our training in peer group facilitation is open to the community. Support circles are free with child minding and transportation assistance available.

Volunteers are always needed. Call 250-3848042; email parent-support@shaw.ca.

1Up: Victoria Single Parent Resource Centre (www.1-up.ca) provides support, education and resources for parents in the Greater Victoria area through free counselling, volunteer training for reception and peer helper positions, a mentoring program for single moms, and a support group for dads. The Centre also offers over 20 integrated life skills and parenting courses which are open to the whole community (fees are on a sliding scale). Child care assistance is available based on financial need.

The Centre provides a bread pantry and free clothing for single parents. Donations of gently-used clothing, small household items, books, and toys are very welcome every Monday and Wednesday.

Centre hours are 9–4 weekdays. 602 Gorge Rd. East; call 250-385-1114 or info@1-up.ca.

South Island Centre for Counselling & Training is an affordable, non-profit, counselling agency serving individuals and families from all social, ethnic, and financial backgrounds. We help people with a wide range of issues including low self-esteem, depression, grief, marital and family conflict, abuse and spiritual direction. We also offer helpful “life” courses. For more information contact us at 250-472-2851; info@southislandcentre.ca.

Victoria Epilepsy & Parkinson’s Centre supports families living with epilepsy by providing tutoring and one on one professional consultations to help your child to live up to their full potential.

We offer epilepsy education workshops in private and public schools, and keep you up to date on the latest research about medications, lifestyle and safety for your child. Visit us at www.vepc.bc.ca to find out more, and to explore our bursaries for Camosun College. Calls are also welcome at 250-475-6677. www.IslandParent.ca

SIGNATURE CONCERT: WORLD OF SONG

MADELEINE HUMER, ARTISTIC DIRECTOR

MONDAY, MAY 27 AT 7PM

ALIX GOOLDEN PERFORMANCE HALL

Angelic voices connect us to our planet, history, the seasons and the stars.

Special Guest: VOX HUMANA directed by Brian Wismath TICKETS $15 | Children 8 and under FREE

www.VictoriaChildrensChoir.ca

AVAILABLE AT IVY’S BOOKSTORE, LARSEN MUSIC, LONG & MCQUADE, AT THE DOOR OR CALL 250.721.0856

Transforming disability into ability.

At Discovery School, learning disabilities are transformed into valuable skills and abilities. Students work at their own pace in small classes, with focused, individualized instruction.

• Experienced, highly-qualified teachers • Ongoing assessment, evaluation & feedback • Improves organizational & study skills • Boost confidence, independence & responsibility • Nurturing environment based on Christian values • For students aged 7 – 17 in grades 1 – 12 • Individual Education Plans • Low student/teacher ratio

Enrolment is limited. For more information or to arrange a tour, visit www.discoveryschool.ca, call Sherri Ko at 250-595-7765 or email principal@discoveryschool.ca

FALCON

GYMNASTICS CENTRE Where Fun & Fitness are #1

July 8 to August 30

Summer Sault Gymnastics Camp 2013 Call for more information:

250-479-6424

Parent & Tot Gym Bugs School Age Recreational 51⁄2 – 14 yrs 18 mos – 3 yrs 31⁄2 – 5 yrs Half Days morning or afternoon camps, Full Day camps. For more information log on to our website at www.falcongymnastics.com We also have: • The best gymnastics and most affordable classes.

• The best Birthday Parties in town.

208 – 721 Vanalman Ave, Victoria, BC V8Z 3B6

250-479-6424

www.falcongymnastics.com May 2013 55

ART SAFARI

Art Classes & Summer Camps Now Open for Registration!

If Mama Ain’t Happy, Nobody’s Happy

O All our art camps are designed to enrich children, foster creativity and imagination, build self-esteem, and have fun!

Art in Nature (1 week) Forest Safari (2 weeks) Ocean Discovery (2 weeks) Voyage Into Space (2 weeks) Nature’s Found Art (2 weeks) Ages 3–8 , 9am to 12pm

www.artsafari.ca 250-634-8835

K, Mamas: You may have been blessed with a beautiful baby and a loving partner, yet you find yourself crying over things that usually wouldn’t bother you. If this is supposed to be such a happy time, why do you feel so low?

Having a baby can be both exhilarating and exhausting. It can bring much joy, but it can also challenge you in ways you never expected. Soon after giving birth, you may find that you feel weepy and your moods can change from minute to minute.

Rest assured, these feelings—known as the “baby blues”—are normal during the first couple of weeks after childbirth. You are not alone. Some degree of emotional upheaval is natural and almost expected after childbirth.

Up to 80 per cent of new mothers experience the baby blues, a reaction likely due to hormonal shifts that begins a few days after delivery and generally lasts no longer than two weeks. Moms often feel better after getting some rest and a helping hand with the baby. But if your blues—or those of someone you love—have lasted more than two weeks, read on.

Is it postpartum depression (PPD)?

Postpartum depression can begin anytime from right after birth to months later, and may last months or longer if left untreated.

A busy and sleep-deprived mom experiencing PPD may deny, even to herself, that she is struggling emotionally, so it is especially important to be aware of warning signs.

Common symptoms may include: • Irritability or hypersensitivity • Difficulty concentrating • Anxiety and worry • Crying or tearfulness • Feelings such as anger, sadness, hopelessness, helplessness, failure or guilt • Lack of interest in activities you usually enjoy • Difficulty sleeping (especially returning to sleep) • Extreme fatigue or exhaustion • Changes in appetite or eating habits

56 Island Parent Magazine

• Lack of self-care • Headaches, stomachaches, muscle or backaches • Inability to enjoy baby • Thoughts of harming yourself or baby. If you think you may act on these thoughts or if you feel incapable of caring for your newborn, seek medical attention immediately.

New Parent Pages Diana Hurschler, BScN

What causes depression after childbirth?

Experts agree there is no single cause but rather a complex combination of hormonal, biochemical, environmental, psychological, and genetic factors. Current research indicates that one of the strongest predictors of PPD is depression or anxiety during pregnancy. Studies have considered the changes in hormone levels that occur in pregnancy and immediately after birth, effects of prolonged sleep deprivation, expectations of motherhood, birth experiences and level of support the mother has with caring for her newborn.

What can help?

As a first step in recovering from and/or preventing a mild to moderate depression, here are some ways to take care of yourself: • Rest as much as you can. The rigors of caring for a newborn 24/7 can leave you exhausted. Moms with postpartum clinical conditions often can’t sleep when they want to, but it is still important to take rest breaks, even if you just flip through a magazine or watch a TV show.

• Eat a healthy diet and drink enough water.

www.kidsinvictoria.com

• Aim to be physically active every day.

Take a daily walk with your baby. If even a brief excursion is too much for you right now, then just go outside, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and sit in the sunshine for a few minutes. It will help.

• Ask for support. Part of being a good mother is knowing when to ask for help— so don’t be afraid to ask for it during this difficult time. Help comes in many forms, ranging from friends who cook meals and fold your laundry to therapy. You need support from others so you can get better.

• Discuss your feelings with your loved ones, health care provider or public health nurse. Tell someone you trust about how you feel. Call an understanding friend. Join a mom’s group for support. You may be surprised at how many women are experiencing similar feelings.

Partner Support A new mother who is trying to cope with depression needs support from her partner and loved ones. Here are some suggestions on how to help out: • Spend time talking about feelings and show that you are trying to understand • Help out with basic household routines such as meal prep and laundry

• Ask and accept help from friends and family to take care of baby or clean the house • Let her know she is loved and valued • Become familiar with symptoms of PPD and seek immediate attention if she talks of harming herself or baby. This is not something you can deal with on your own.

Postpartum depression is a serious health issue. One way to show support is to attend healthcare provider appointments and share your concerns. Don’t forget about your own well-being during this time: it is also important for you to talk to someone about how you are feeling.

Where to Get Help If you are experiencing any of the above signs, please seek help. Postpartum depression and anxiety can impact you physically and affect your emotions, thinking, and behaviours. Without treatment, postpartum depression affects both you and your baby.

A mother who is depressed for a long time can have difficulty bonding and caring for her baby, which can have effects on her baby’s sense of safety, security and love.

Treating depression early will lessen possible long-term effects on both mother and baby.

K-9 Distributed Learning

There are many resources and supports available to help you: • Your health care provider or public health nurse • Community family services or resource centre • HealthLink BC (dial 8-1-1) or toll free for deaf/hearing‑impaired at 1‑866‑889‑4700 • Pacific Postpartum Support Society (604‑255‑7999) • Local support groups • BC Mental Health Information Line (1‑800‑661‑2121) All children deserve the chance to have a healthy mom and all moms deserve a chance to enjoy their life and their children. If you are feeling depressed after having a baby, do not suffer alone. The best help usually comes from a mix of support from health care providers, family, friends, self‑help, and community connections.

May your Mother’s Day be a happy one!

Diana Hurschler, RN BscN, childbirth educator, certified breastfeeding counselor, has been helping families in their childbearing years and beyond since 1998. Diana is the proud mama of four little ones. She can be reached at diana@hurschler.com.

Hands-On Home-Learning for a Sustainable World - expense budget provided

The joy of learning - naturally.

http://oakandorca.ca http://oakandorca.ca 250 383 6619 888 383 6619) 250 383(1 6609 www.IslandParent.ca

- unique hands-on learning activities - support from a certified teacher - constructive feedback without grading - children can learn at their natural pace

May 2013 57

Preschool & Child Care Directory CENTRAL SAANICH

Highlands

Chrysalis Child Care..........................250-652-0815 A nurturing and stimulating environment for a small group of 3–5 year olds. Qualified ECE promotes learning through play. www.chrysalischildcare.ca.

Lexie’s Little Bears’ Child Care Inc....................................250-590-3603 Our Outdoor Nature program provides your child with an experience un-like no other in the elements! Our program boasts our OWN 2 acre forest for your child to explore and learn while our ECEs provide a strong Reggio Emilia Influence. Like us on Facebook. www. lexieslittlebears.com. Space available. Waitlist for September being taken now!

Colwood/LANGFORD Almosthome Childcare/Preschool...250-590-7666 Quality childcare with a preschool curriculum/kindergarten readiness program. Experienced Early Childhood Educators. Nurturing environment for ages 10 months to 5 years old. www.almosthomecare.com.

Caring Touch Daycare.......................250-478-4886 A warm, loving, fun family daycare in a safe, nurturing environment. Infant/toddler care for ages 1–5 years.

Jenn’s Little Bears.............................250-478-8999 A safe nurturing environment for children from infancy to kindergarten. Our Infant and Toddler Program enriches each child’s development while our 3-5 Program prepares children for kindergarten. Two separate buildings allow each age group space to grow!

Miles of Smiles Licensed Child Care..........................250-298-7374 Dedicated to offering quality care where caring, learning, diversity, guidance and fun are the priority. www. milesofsmileschildcare.com Music Makers Child Care Centre.....250-294-3916 Offering an innovative environment that develops musical abilities and encourages a love of music while following a preschool curriculum/kindergarten readiness program. Group care for children 2 to 6 and infant/toddler care for ages 12 to 36 months. www.musicmakerschildcare.com

CORDOVA BAY Carrot Seed Preschool......................250-652-2311 Where children can discover, imagine, construct and learn through play. Wondrous natural playground. www.carrotseedpreschool.com.

Cordova Bay Preschool....................250-658-3441 A bright and cheerful parent-participation preschool with a philosophy of “learning through play.” www. cordovabaypreschool.org.

ESQUIMALT CIARA Early Childhood Centre.........250-386-7369 Education and fun hand in hand. Exceptional care for little ones ages 12 month-5yrs in an inclusive centre with Christian values.

Island Kids Academy Esquimalt.......250-381-2929 High quality child care (ages 1-5). Preschool curriculum offered within a warm, caring all-day program. Character development using the Virtues Project. Access to community programs including swimming, skating, Victoria Conservatory of Music. Part-time spaces available. www.islandkids.ca.

La Pre-Maternelle Appletree Preschool..........................250-479-0292 French immersion program. 30 months to school age.

Licensed Christian centre. www.prematernelleappletree.com.

Simply Fun Childcare Centre............250-881-3958 A warm, loving, fun and nurturing place for children to grow and learn. We have spaces available for registration ages 2.5 to 12 in our Licensed Group Facility. We offer extraordinary childcare, before and after school programs and a preschool. Our teachers are extremely qualified with ECE training and have lots of experience.

Call Brenda to set up a tour. Let your child’s light shine bright with us!

58 Island Parent Magazine

METCHOSIN A Growing Place................................250-391-1133 Half day program (AM or PM) for 2.5-5 yrs. ECE educator, small class size. Our own petting farm. Summer program for July.

Metchosin Co-op Preschool.............250-478-9241 Come and visit our stunning natural outdoor playspace, warm, nurturing, play-based,inclusive program allowing parents to grow and learn alongside their child.

Exceptional ECE Staff provide an enriching experience for 2.5 - 5 year olds. Come grow with us! Est.1960.

Reg. begins Mar.1 @ 9am. www.metchosinpreschool. wordpress.com.

North SAANICH In The Garden Childcare Centre.......250-654-0306 A GREAT PLACE TO GROW. Offering preschool, full day care, before and after school care for children aged 2.5 to 12 years old. Open all year.

OAK BAY Emmanuel Preschool........................250-598-0573 Children learn through play in our non-denominational Christian preschool near UVic. Bright attractive setting. www.emmanuelpreschool.ca.

Gonzales Co-op Preschool...............250-727-1003 Children explore their imaginations in our learning-throughplay environments and large natural playground. Our Reggio-Emilia inspired program focuses on art, nature and music. Over 50 years serving Victoria’s families. Nuturing and highly qualified ECE and ECE Assistant. Parent participation level options available and allergy-aware. Join us! www.gonzalespreschool.com.

Kindred Spirits Children’s House........250-590-6966 Now accepting registration for a small group of 2.5–5 year olds in a purpose built Montessori classroom.

The prepared environment stimulates and engages the children at their own pace with hands on, size, age and developmentally appropriate materials. www.kindredspiritschildrenshouse.com Oak Bay Co-op Preschool..................250-592-1922 Children Learn Through Play in this parent participation school. Our bright facility is allergy-free with a large outdoor playground. www.oakbaypreschool.com.

Recreation Oak Bay..........................250-370-7200 Fully licensed, qualified ECE Daycare and Preschool with play based learning. After school care also available.

St. Christopher’s Montessori School............................250-595-3213 A beautiful, warm environment, steps from beach and park in Oak Bay. We offer an enriched Montessori program – half days for 3 and 4 year olds and half or full day Kindergarten. www.stcmsoakbaybc.com.

SAANICH Arbutus Grove Children’s Centre.....250-477-3731 Innovative and dynamic preschool programming.

Children’s learning is nurtured and guided through exploration, discovery, play and creative expression. www.arbutusgrove.ca.

Cloverdale Child Care.......................... 250-995-1766 Preschool for 3 & 4 year olds, Come grow with us and learn through play. www.cloverdalechildcare.com.

Full o’ Beans Preschool........................ 250.360.1148 Opening September 2013. We offer ‘learn through play’ programming designed to foster your child’s natural curiosity and imagination. Flexible scheduling, 2.5 and 4 hour programs, qualified staff. Registration is ongoing!www.saanichneighbourhoodplace.com.

Island Montessori House..................250-592-4411 Inclusive, integrated and nurturing preschool, kindergarten, Grade 1/2 program. Located in a lovely rural setting. Extended day available. www.islandmontessori.com.

Lakehill Co-op Preschool.................250-477-4141 Where children’s development is nurtured through a child centered inclusive, play based program.

Come visit our out natural outdoor playground and meet our loving qualified ECE team. Multiple Levels of participation available, please enquire. www.lakehillpreschool.org.

Lambrick Park Preschool & Childcare............................................250-477-8131 Gordon Head’s only parent-participation preschool and childcare centre. Flexible options, play-based learning and outdoor play. Allergy friendly. Celebrating 40+ years. www.lambrickparkpreschool.ca.

Little Readers Academy....................250-477-5550 An enriched learn-to-read program for your 3-6 yearold! Reading, Writing and Math. Half-day, weekend and evening sessions available. www.oxfordlearning.com.

Montessori Educare..........................250-881-8666 Beautiful learning environments in Broadmead and Saanichton. 30 months – 5 years. Summer program available. Special needs are welcome. www.montessorieducare.com.

Neighbourhood Junior Kindergarten..250-479-4410 Offering an early literacy program 4 mornings/wk. (TF) for 4 year olds in an attractive, culturally-sensitive learning environment in Lake Hill School.

Oakcrest Preschool...........................250-472-0668 • Two fully qualified teachers, AM classes • No duty days, wide variety of parent jobs • www.oakcrestpreschool.org Playtime Preschool...........................250-383-3101 AM or PM preschool classes up to 20 hrs/wk. Tillicum.

Spacious facility, qualified ECEs. Let’s Talk About Touching Program. www.playtimepreschool.com.

Puddles & Paints Playschool............250-658-6573 Introduce your children to Nature with our outdoor nature-lovers program. Our centre backs up to 15 acres of our “secret-garden” parkland where we can learn and explore! Strong environmental awareness with a “Naturalplay-based” philosophy. ECE staff, and a strong Reggio Emilia Influence! Celebrating and supporting your child’s world and successes! Like us on Facebook!

Ready Set Grow Preschool...............250-472-1530 A warm, caring, quality Learning Through Play environment. Gordon Head area with a highly qualified ECE. heosc@pacificcoast.net.

Rogers Child Care Centre.................250-744-2343 Trusted High Quality Programs since 1991. Early Learning and Out of School Care. www.rogerschildcare.com.

St. Joseph’s Catholic Preschool..............................250-479-1232 ext 120 • A Christian child centre for 3–5 year olds.

• A warm nurturing and challenging program • Offered by St. Joseph’s Catholic School.

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Preschool & Child Care Directory St. Margaret’s Preschool & Junior Kindergarten..........................250-479-7171 Our programme for 3 and 4 year old girls offers a nurturing and educationally stimulating curriculum provided by experienced ECE staff and specialist teachers. Our state of the art facility is located in beautiful environmental surroundings. www.stmarg.ca.

Strawberry Vale Preschool...............250-479-4213 Children learn through play at our parent participation preschool. Programs for 3 and 4 year olds at “The Little Red Schoolhouse.”

www.strawberryvalepreschool.org.

Wiseways Preschool & Daycare.......250-477-1312

Fully licensed Christian preschool for 3 and 4 year olds. Designed to meet the needs of the whole child. Subsidized fees welcome. www.wiseways. lambrick.com.

SIDNEY Positive Path Early Learning............250-655-7244

Year-round quality child care where preschoolers explore and learn in a culture of Christian values and virtues. positivepath@shaw.ca.

VICTORIA ArtsCalibre Academy........................250-382-3533 Comprehensive programs for Preschool through Grade 5, delivering academic excellence through music, dance, drama and visual arts. Outstanding educators, locations and facilities. www.ArtsCalibre.ca Babies to Big Kids Childcare............... 250-590-5540 949 Fullerton Ave. Daycare owner, 250-818-9225 Licenced group childcare for children 6 months to 12 years old. Three programs offered: Infant toddler program, Three to Five Program and Before and After School Care Program. Open 6:30am-5:30pm. Weekly music and movement classes. www.babiestobigkids. com, info@babiestobigkids.com.

Butterfly Corner.................................... 250-381-4845 Licensed family day care in James Bay. Since 1998.

ECE. Ages 1–5. Full time. Fun & Educational. http:// ButterflyCornerCreativeLearningCentre.com Castleview Child Care.......................250-595-5355 Learning Through Play & Experience. Licensed nonprofit, qual. ECE staff. Since 1958. Preschool and full-time care. www.castleviewchildcarecentre.com.

Cedar Daycare...................................250-479-2032 Community oriented, NFP Child Care facility. Wide variety of activities offered including the use of a private outdoor pool during the summer months. Licensed ECE educators devoted to nurturing children aged 30 months – 5 years. www.cedardaycare.com.

Christ Church Cathedral Childcare.. 250-383-5132 ECE and specialist teachers provide an outstanding all day licensed program for 3 and 4 year olds in our spacious and welcoming facility in James Bay. www. cathedralschool.ca.

Downtown Y Child Care Centre.......250-413-8869 Enriched program, for children ages 3-5 years, supporting healthy child development and future school success. www.victoriay.com.

Lansdowne Co-op Preschool...........250-370-5392 An extraordinary learning environment for families with young children. Parent participation. wwwlansdownepreschool.com.

Nightingale Preschool and Junior Kindergarten...................250-595-7544 – Taking children’s learning forward – One of Victoria’s leading preschools and Junior Kindergartens. Balanced approach to play and education.

Programme supports literacy, numeracy. Visit www. nightingalepreschool.com. Fernwood.

Parkdale Early Childhood Centre.....250-382-0512 We offer quality care and positive experiences for children in our diverse daycare and preschool programs. Our rich curriculum includes music classes from the Victoria Conservatory of Music. parkdalechildcare@shaw.ca.

Rainbow Express Daycare................250-382-2314 Enriched preschool style program in a daycare setting.

Visit our website at www.rainbowexpressdaycare.com.

Ross Bay Preschool..........................250-383-7445 Positive/supportive program motivating children to learn and discover. Curriculum builds on interests of the children. www.rossbaypreschool.com The Sir James Douglas Playschool.250-389-0500 Fun, creative and educational ECE program for 3-5 year olds to grow and develop life long skills. Come play and learn in our bright and modern centre in Fairfield.

Victoria Montessori...........................250-380-0534 Unique, innovative learning environment combining the best of Montessori and Learning Through Play. Open yr. round. 30mths–grade 1. www.victoriamontessori.com.

VIEW ROYAL A Secret Garden Preschool..............250-380-8293 Program built on Christian values. Monthly themes, weekly topics and daily activities. asecretgardenpreschool@shaw.ca.

Island Kids Academy View Royal.....250-727-2929 High quality child care (ages 1-5). Preschool curriculum offered within a warm, caring child care environment.

Character development using the Virtues Project.

Access to community programs including swimming, skating, Victoria Conservatory of Music. Part-time spaces available. www.islandkids.ca.

Little Friends Childcare Center........250-479-8423 For a creative learning environment. Licensed group facility. Infants/Toddlers/Preschool.

Little Wonders Preschool (VROSCS)...........................................250-744-2718 A creative and suuportive program that will prepare your child for a lifetime of learning! OSC also available. www.viewroyalosc.com.

View Royal Preschool........................250-479-8067 An exciting inclusive program in an exceptional care environment. Licensed 3–5 year olds. Outside play and themes enrich this program. viewroyalps@ uniserve.com.

Mill Bay / Cobble Hill Starchild Centre..................................250-929-3240 Unique infant/toddler daycare, combines the best of Montessori and Waldorf. Our 9 acre hobby farm enables each child to have a garden plot, participate in planting trees, picking fruit, feeding animals, and other outside adventures. www.starchildcentre.ca.

DUNCAN Angel Care Christian Preschool.........250-746-5919 A quality, enriched program for preschool children.

Located in Queen of Angels Catholic School.

Maple Tree Play House Licensed Family Childcare...............250-746-5060 A daycare program that provides enriched outdoor play time and activities that build on a child’s intrinsic love of nature. Healthy meals and snacks are provided. mapletreekids@telus.net..

Sunrise Waldorf School, Kindercottage Preschool Nursery......250-743-7253 A morning program for 3 and 4 yr olds in a warm natural atmosphere where wonder is nurtured and outdoor play is abundant. Details at www.sunrisewaldorfschool.org.

Parent & Child programs also available!

Chemainus Cherry Tree Child Care Centre.........250-246-9195 Preschool program nurturing creative play and engaging learning activity. 30 months to age five. Qualified and experienced Early Childhood Educator.

St. Joseph’s Preschool.....................250-246-3191 A Christian learning environment for 3–5 year olds.

Active participation in the life of the school. Parental involvement.

Qualicum Beach Children’s Discovery Centre.............250-752-4343 Our program recognizes the uniqueness of each child and provides a nurturing, safe and creative learning environment. Preschool, Groupcare, Out of School care. ECE qualified staff. childrensdiscoverycentre@ hotmail.com.

Little Star Children’s Centre.............250-752-4554 Earth friendly preschool education inspired by nature.

Kinder-Prep classes. Licensed group care. ECE instructors. www.littlestardaycare.ca. littlestar@shaw.ca.

Port Alberni John Paul II Catholic School............250-723-0637 “Where children grow and learn through play.” We provide a program that will inspire development physically, socially, emotionally, cognitively, creatively and spiritually.

Looking for child care? Taking care of children?

Call your local Child Care Resource & Referral for free referrals and resources.

Child Care

Resource & Referral Your community’s best source of child care information and resources. www.IslandParent.ca

Victoria & Gulf Islands: 250-382-7000 or 1-800-750-1868 Sooke: 250-642-5152 Westshore: 250-391-4324 Cowichan Valley: 250-746-4135 local 231 PacificCare (Ladysmith north): 250-756-2022 or 1-888-480-2273 Funded by the Province of BC

www.islandfamilyinfo.ca www.ccrr.bc.ca May 2013 59

Ad Directory All Fun........................ 13 Art Safari.................... 56 Bellies In Bloom.......... 17 Burnside Gorge........... 10 Camp in the Community............. 19 Camp Narnia.............. 11 Camp Pringle.............. 31 Camp Qwanoes..........BC Camp Thunderbird...... 48 Canadian College of Performing Arts....... 36 Capernwray................ 64 Cathedral School... 18, 52 Chemainus Theatre..... 31 Choices Adoption....... IBC City Centre Park.......... 19 Color Me Mine........... IBC Conseil Scolaire.......... 27 CRD Parks.................. 35 Danielle’s Studio........... 8 Discovery School........ 55 Emmanuel Preschool.. 11 Falcon Gymnastics...... 55 Maxine Fisher............. 22 Rob Fleming............... 37 Footholds................... 26 FUN Camps................ 56 GIFTS......................... 18 Girl Guides................. 50 Glowing Touch Doula... 48 GNS Marine Adventure............... 49 Happy Island Diapers.. 10 Helping Hands Doula..... 8 Hip Baby................... IBC ICE Victoria................... 6 IMAX............................ 4 Investors Group........... 34 Island Children’s Festival..................... 1 Island Farms............... 32 Island Montessori........ 52 JamTots..................... 36 KIV............................. 45 Kye Bay...................... 11 Lansdowne Preschool................ 50 Lexie’s Little Bears........ 5 Lifestyle Markets......... 57 Little Spirits Garden..... 23 Luxton Pro Rodeo........ 48 Maria Montessori School.................... 17 Miles of Smiles........... 48

Mothering Touch........ IFC Oak & Orca........... 47, 57 The OCEAN 98.5........ 61 Operation Track Shoes............ 12 Park Sands................. 51 Pemberton Holmes..... 22 Premier Photography... 23 The Raptors................ 43 READ Society................ 3 Restart Computers...... 35 Royal BC Museum........ 2 Royal Victoria Yacht Club.............. 49 Saanich Dental........... 47 Saanich Recreation.... IFC Savvy Squirrel............. 21 Scallywags................ IFC Serious Coffee............ 39 Sleep Sense............... 15 Spina Bifida Association............. 62 St. Margaret’s School.................... 41 Stagecoach................ 12 Strawberry Shortcake............... 15 Sunrise Waldorf.......... 42 Thrifty Foods............... 33 TJs The Kiddies Store.. 53 Tom Lee Music........... 18 UVic Vikes.................. 52 Vancouver Island Baby Fair................ 20 Veselka Dance............ 53 Victoria Academy of Ballet................. IBC Victoria Academy of Dramatic Arts.......... 44 Victoria Children’s Choir...................... 55 Victoria Conservatory of Music................. 51 Victoria German School.................... 20 Victoria Midwives.......... 5 VIHA........................... 46 Vitamin Shop................ 4 Jody Watson............... 23 Welcome Wagon......... 21 Westshore Parks & Recreation.............. 40 Westside Stables ....... 39 World Partnership Walk....................... 49

60 Island Parent Magazine

Timid Toddler

O

ut in the garden, planting strawberries, I found a large worm and put it on the edge of the planter box. “Look Angus,” I said. He eyed it, and slowly approached. “Do you want to touch?” I asked.

He most definitely did not. He stood there staring at it warily until, in one great twist, the worm launched itself off the planter and onto the toe of Angus’s rubber boot.

There was silence—Angus’s face red, his mouth open wide, engaged in the long inhale that precedes all of his most bloodcurdling screams.

I pulled him against me as he sobbed and shook, as he smashed his runny nose into my chest and pulled my hair, his feet kicking at my stomach, trying to climb up my body. I wasn’t surprised. Angus is afraid of things.

As Angus gets older, some of his fears are fading. He doesn’t mind riding in shopping carts anymore, and after about a hundred washing machine cycles spent on my lap, clinging to my neck, he has concluded that the machine is tolerable. But it seems like for every fear that is overcome, a handful more appear. Angus is afraid of most forms of motion including escalators and elevators, swings, and the car driving fast on turns. He is afraid of loud noises: dog barks, vacuums, occasionally sneezes and coughs, and the stuffed heron we gave him for Christmas that croaks when squeezed (in retrospect, maybe not the best stocking stuffer). He is generally afraid of the water, though will tolerate swimming lessons so long as he has sufficient time to stare at the pool before entering it, isn’t required to get his head wet and doesn’t ever have to jump or slide in. He likes the tub, but he’s terrified of the drain. On the worm day, I planted the strawberries without gloves, and then tried to get the dirt out from under my nails with a nail file. Angus watched me for a moment, his eyes wide, his body trembling, and then he burst into tears.

I know that fears are a normal part of toddlerhood, but sometimes I worry. I wasn’t exactly a brave kid myself. I think back to my Pennysaver paper route and how afraid I was of the seemingly-violent housecats lying in front of mail slots. I recall the wiener dog incident—the rabid mutt who chased me

around and around and around a parked car while its owner stood on the sidewalk laughing. I didn’t face my fears. In order to avoid the wiener dog, I paid a boy in my class to deliver the papers on its street.

Maternity & Beyond Laura TRUNKEY I don’t want Angus to be reckless, I definitely want him to feel safe, but I was hoping that in the courage department he would take after Mike rather than me. Apparently the experts say reassurance is all that’s required. I do this. It takes me forever to vacuum our small townhouse because I stop every 10 seconds to hug Angus and promise him the machine is harmless.

Angus’s table manners make vacuuming a necessity, but maybe I should forgo it. Maybe I should allow the floors to become carpeted with bread crumbs and masticated strawberries. Is that really worse than allowing my child to cower in the corner, screaming at the top of his lungs? Sometimes, to ensure quiet and to assuage my guilt, I put him in the baby carrier for the task.

And what about elevators? I don’t actually ever need to take them. Angus can handle stairs, and he’s not too heavy that I can’t carry him when he inevitably slumps down and refuses to budge. But is it better to take elevators to show Angus there is nothing to be afraid of, or is it better to avoid them altogether?

The reality is, there are only a few fears I can shelter Angus from. The rest of them he’ll have to face. Maybe what it will take is to be a better role model—to work on vanquishing a few fears of my own. The first one on my list: my fear of a fearful child.

Laura Trunkey is a writer, editor and mother of the amazing Angus. She can be reached at laurajtrunkey@gmail.com.

www.kidsinvictoria.com

The Best Nest

B

irds are lucky. When we mammals are faced with challenges like predators, we can run away, although not always fast enough. Few mammals can migrate, exploit habitats, or avoid predators quite like birds can. But, like some blessings, that mobility comes at a cost.

Every part of a bird’s body is designed for aerodynamic efficiency—hollow bones, smaller organs, the list goes on. Imagine the weight of several eggs added to that. Once a plane is overloaded, it cannot fly. The great mobility of birds comes with the price of being unable to carry their growing offspring on their bodies.

Finding a safe place to rear their eggs and young is critical. They have, it seems, a “baby dilemma”: predators love devouring eggs and chicks, and the mother cannot fly any distance

with them. But, in solving this dilemma birds have come up with a creative strategy: the nest.

A nest is entirely purpose-built. It is for raising chicks, not for living in. In most cases a nest is used only for a few short weeks. Because of this, birds strategize to get this need met quickly and efficiently. If a bird can avoid building a nest, it will. Take, for example, B.C.’s Ancient Murrelet. Within 24-64 hours, the chick is ready to walk out into the world, leaving land under the cover of darkness to spend the rest of its existence at sea. Its rapid development allows parents to skip nest building entirely.

Instead, a simple tree root hollow or soft spot of moss does the trick.

B.C.’s Wood Ducks, Chickadees, Tree Swallows, and wrens also take the “easy” approach. They simply use a retired nest of another bird, normally a woodpecker. Great Horned Owls even use old crow nests, doing little more than mussing up the twigs to freshen the new nursery.

And then there are the birds who find even a recycled nest too much work. They choose to let other birds do the building, and the rearing!

62 Island Parent Magazine

Local Cowbirds hide their camouflaged eggs in Song Sparrow nests, where they are raised along with the Song Sparrow’s young. Even Cliff Swallows don’t miss the chance to lay the occasional egg in their neighbour’s nest.

Nature Notes HEATHER CHATWIN And if another’s home is not an option? This is when nest design comes into play. Birds are smart, and if the job cannot be done through avoidance, it can be done through technique.

One technique is careful and creative material selection. Parent birds can cut back the time they spend guarding their young by choosing materials that repel predators. Manure disguises the scent of nestlings; snake skins in the nest may deter hungry squirrels. Some kinds of falcons opt to build near wasps, using their stings to ward off biting insects and other predators. Nuthatches take a more determined approach: they smear sap around the entry holes of their nests, and then trap ants in the sap, using the ant’s sting against hungry intruders.

Building a nest can take hundreds of trips to the surrounding area, and using what’s close speeds up the process, explaining perhaps the strange and wonderful things we find in birds’ nests. For example, the Canadian Double Crested Cormorants have salvaged from an old trading vessel pocket knives, hair pins, and combs to add to their nesting roost. Or the finch that constructed its nest entirely of office supplies—from rubber bands, to paper clips, to matches and toothpicks. Sometimes hard problems bring the more creative solutions, and for birds it is the nest that gives the luxury of flight.

Find out more about nesting birds at CRD Regional Parks’ nature outings and events, such as The Best Nest Guided Walk for ages seven years and under or Winged Migration Drop-in Event for all ages. All the details can be found at www.crd.bc.ca/parks/events.

Heather Chatwin is a parks naturalist with CRD Regional Parks, where she gets to show children the wonders of the forest and its creatures.

www.kidsinvictoria.com

South Island Business Directory Natural Health Care for Children Homeopathy & Nutrition for: • Autism & ASD • Developmental Disorders • Behavioural Disorders • Ear Infections • Asthma • Eczema

Move to the head of the class.

One Tutor

One Student Your Home

Art Classes • Drawing • Painting • Sculpture • Cartooning • Portfolio Preparation

Children & Adults • Day & Evening Classes Fabulous Results • Original Art for Sale

Artistic Statement Gallery & School of Fine Art

Smart Tutor Referrals.com www.drzimmermann.org 250-590-5828

Professional In-Home Tutorial Support

Call 250-544-1588 to learn more.

Is Your Child Struggling at School?

I can help your child Karen Murdoch Therapeutic Tutor

778-430-3183 karenmurdoch.ca

Looking for a way to ease the stress of being Separated or Divorced with Children?

Monarch House offers an interdisciplinary approach to treating individuals from infancy to adulthood with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and other developmental disabilities.

Professional Services Flexible hours (including weekends)

Monarch House - Victoria Unit 211 - 611 Discovery Street 250.220.8999 monarchhousevictoria@cbi.ca

Transition Services for Families

www.monarchhouse.ca

Phone 250-590-4114 Email info@tsconsultingvictoria.ca or find us online at

www.tsconsultingvictoria.ca

Celebrating our “Original” Outdoor Learning Program!

Christian Academy NOW TAKING ENROLLMENT

Supervised Access Visits

DIAGNOSIS, INTERVENTION & GROUP PROGRAMS

Lighthouse

Offering independent K to 12 education in a safe Christian environment

Call Joan in the Oak Bay Monterey Mews, #107–2250 Oak Bay Ave, 250-383-0566 www.artisticstatementgalleryandschool.com Now offering Art lessons on SKYPE for those unable to make it to the studio

We bring your child’s classroom…OUTSIDE!”

BETTER GRADES START HERE! Pre-K to Grade 12 Confidence & Motivation Study Skills & Homework Support Regular Reports to Parents

• “Life is playfulness. We need to play so that we can rediscover the magic all around us.” – Flora Colao • Our property boasts 2 acres of forest with 2 huge natural play spaces for the children to discover!

• Providing a quality Natural program through outdoor play, starting your child on the right path towards a healthy, active forever lifestyle.

Call today and enroll!

Victoria 250.477.5550

250.474.5311

203-1595 McKenzie Ave. Victoria, BC, V8N 1A4 victoria@oxfordlearning.com

lighthousechristianacademy.com

oxfordlearning.com

www.IslandParent.ca

Learn and grow with us!

250-590-3603

New Pics at

www.lexieslittlebears.com May 2013 63

Cut It Out!

Tips from Parent Educator Allison Rees of LIFE Seminars

Talk Too Much?

I

What to try:

t’s really hard to listen when somebody talks too much, especially when you are a kid with limited attention. If you are using too many words, Cut It Out! In an effective conversation, people talk for short spurts and give each other time to respond. This kind of exchange respects the need for both people to listen and speak. When it comes to children, they often lose us after the first five words.

We can talk over their heads as well by using terms they don’t understand or by discussing concepts they are too young and inexperienced to grasp.

Parents must remember to keep instructions clear and brief. Say what you want to say with as few words as possible. If you think you have a tendency to talk too much, you are probably right. Pay attention to times when you don’t have to say anything to your child and see what happens.

• Use one-word reminders: “Garbage” instead of nagging about taking out the garbage.

• Ask for what you want specifically without moralizing and lecturing.

• Say nothing when you notice a time that you might usually natter needlessly.

• Keep your message brief and to the point.

• Stick with one issue at a time.

• Give your child time to respond.

• Be a good listener.

LIFE Seminars has two books available, Sidestepping the Power Struggle and The Parent Child Connection. See www. lifeseminars.com.

WWW . CAPERNWRAY . CA

• Bible School • Conferences • Outdoor Education

n for ust istratio g e r y & Aug l s u s J i m n i t ’ Don eeks - 25 Bible W gust 23 u H o l i d ay A e c n onfere Men’s C

• •

• Private Retreats • Personal Getaways 64 Island Parent Magazine

www.kidsinvictoria.com

Capernwray URL

Join us this summer at either our downtown or NEW Colwood location!

Imagination, creativity & movement are the focus of our Summer Dance Camps for children ages 4-12 years of age.

Now Open in Broadmead Village

Both girls & boys will thrive in this positive & nurturing environment.

Our teachers are award winning, internationally qualified & experienced professionals.

The Paint -It -Yourself Pottery Studio With over 400 Paint Your Own Ceramics items and concepts to choose from, more than 70 assorted colors to paint and play with, and all kinds of events, parties and daily deals happening, Color Me Mine always gives you a reason to stop by.

Visit us online and book your Birthday Party or event today!

Visit our website VictoriaAcademyOfBallet.ca for a complete description of all summer classes & dates.

Like us on Facebook | Location: 643 Broughton Street Victoria BC Tel: 250.590.6752 | admin@VictoriaAcademyOfBallet.ca

Check out the best Mother's Day Gift Ideas, created by you!

Like us on Facebook or join our Mail List to get all the news and deals offered weekly!

www.v ictoria.colormemine.com

and Options For Prospective Adoptive Parents Our mission is to work locally and globally toward every child having a permanent, loving family and a safe, nurturing home and community.

Domestic Adoption

Call us directly or consult our website to find out more about these options: • Infant Adoption • Direct Placement Adoption • Children In Foster Care • Step Parent Adoption • Relative Adoption • Teen Adoption • LGBT Adoption

International Adoption

CHOICES assists families across Canada with adoptions from the following countries: Colombia, Ethiopia, Guyana, Honduras, Hungary, India, Jamaica, Japan, Kenya, Panama, Peru, Poland, Russia, Sri Lanka, Trinidad, USA, Vietnam.

250.479.9811 1.888.479.9811

www.choicesadoption.ca

Give them a summer that lasts

forever!

summer camps JUNIORS, JUNIOR HIGH, YOUTH, LEADERSHIP

Jump into the adventure and let friendship fill each day. Experience a world of discovery with an amazing staff.

family retreats open house ENJOY THE BEST OF A CANADIAN JUNE 8, 2013

WEST-COAST SUMMER!

For a summer brochure:

www.qwanoes.ca 1-888-997-9266 • life@qwanoes.ca

LIFE LIKE NO OTHER!

Located on Vancouver Island, BC, Canada