Inweekly sept 22 2016 issue

Independent News | September 22, 2016 | Volume 17 | Number 39 | inweekly.net

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winners & losers

outtakes

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buzz

5

9

Death is the inescapable thing...

a&e

cover story

15

11

22

publisher Rick Outzen

art director Richard Humphreys

editor & creative director Joani Delezen

contributing writers Duwayne Escobedo, Jennifer Leigh, Chuck Shepherd, Hamishe Randall, Shelby Smithey

contact us info@inweekly.net

calendar 16

Independent News is published by Inweekly Media, Inc., P.O. Box 12082, Pensacola, FL 32591. (850)438-8115. All materials published in Independent News are copyrighted. Š 2015 Inweekly Media, Inc. All rights reserved.

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winners & losers

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losers

BILL NELSON The U.S. Senator from Florida announced that Eastern Shipbuilding Group has been awarded a $10.5 billion contract to build two dozen new U.S. Coast Guard cutters. Nelson, the top Democrat on the Senate’s Commerce Committee that oversees the Coast Guard, said the contract to build 25 new Off shore Patrol Cutters could bring 2,000 new jobs to the Panama City area, where the company is based. At a cost of around $484 million per ship, it’s the largest contract the Coast Guard has ever awarded in its 226-year history.

JOEY GRAVES State Attorney Bill Eddins announced that Joseph Graves, former FDLE chemist charged with racketeering and other offenses, had pleaded guilty and was sentenced to 15 years state prison. The case was brought in 2014 after Escambia County Sheriff’s Office investigators discovered that drug evidence in cases worked

by Graves had been removed and replaced with over-the-counter pills. An extensive investigation of the case found missing drug evidence in more than 90 cases worked by Graves.

JANET HOLLEY The Florida Tax Collec-

PATSY D. BLACKSHEAR The former Planning Director for the Walton County Planning Department entered a plea as charged to Perjury in an Official Proceeding and Perjury in an Unofficial Proceeding. Circuit Judge Ross Goodman withheld adjudication of guilt and sentenced Blackshear to five years of probation and the ability to terminate her supervision after two and a half years if there are no violations of probation.

SEVILLE QUARTER Its Festival de San

FY 2018 STATE BUDGET After cutting taxes by $784.9 million over the last three years, lawmakers face a lean budget year during the next session. The outlook projects a surplus of just $7.5 million. The following year, a budget gap of $1.3 billion could open up, followed by $1.8 billion the year after that. Republican leadership doesn’t plan to raise taxes, so we should expect spending cuts. Enterprise Florida, the state's publicprivate economic development agency, may be the first casualty.

tors Association presented the Escambia County Tax Collector with the Excellence in Financial Operations Legacy Award, which recognizes offices that have achieved innovation, customer focus, a well-managed budget and a clean audit in finance operations. The award is given only to those tax collectors previously recognized with the Excellence in Finance Operations Award.

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outtakes

by Rick Outzen

THE UNLIKELY CONVERSION Once again Florida will be the state that decides who will be the next president.

The latest New York Times Upshot/ Siena College poll has the race in Florida as a dead heat.

A little more than a month away from the vote, Democrat Hillary Clinton leads Republican Donald Trump by a single point, 41 to 40 percent, among likely voters in a four-way race that includes Gary Johnson of the Libertarian Party and Jill Stein of the Green Party. The race is tied in the headto-head race, 43-43.

Considering all of the outlandish statements made

by Trump, Clinton’s inability to pull away from her GOP rival must be troubling to her campaign managers. As unlikeable as the New York billionaire may be to some, the former Secretary of State has distractors that want anybody but her elected to the White House.

Trump dominates the white likely voters in Florida, 50-30 percent, while Clinton has healthy margins among Blacks, 82-4 percent, and Hispanics, 61-21 percent.

The Clinton campaign will need an Obama-type “Get out the vote” campaign to drive new and unlikely voters to the polls in November. In 2012, Karl Rove and other Republican political strategists were convinced the black community and young college voters had lost their enthusiasm for President Barack Obama and would stay

home. They believed Mitt Romney would win by a landslide.

Of course, they were wrong, which led to Rove’s memorable meltdown during Fox News election night coverage as he watched Ohio and Florida go for Obama.

Like Romney four years ago, Trump has a considerable lead among the likeliest voters, the older, generally whiter voters who vote in every primary and midterm election. He has a five-point lead with voters who cast ballots in the 2014 midterm election. Among registered voters with a greater than 90 percent chance of turning out, Trump has a seven-point lead.

Like Obama, Clinton will need to attract less regular voters where the poll showed she had a sizable lead. Among registered voters who did not vote in 2014 midterm elections, Clinton has a 10-point lead. Can she convince them to turnout in the presidential election?

Clinton will have to inspire unlikely voters and help them realize their votes matter. In other words, convert the unlikely to likely.

On the Republican side, Trump will continue to fire up his base and maybe create enough chaos that the unlikely voters get more disillusioned and stay away from the circus.

It’s a toss up. {in} rick@inweekly.net

Clinton will have to inspire unlikely voters and help them realize their votes matter. In other words, convert the unlikely to likely.

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SAUNDERS SELECTED

By Rick Outzen On Sept. 15, the University of West Florida Board of Trustees named Dr. Martha Saunders the university's sixth president, effective Jan. 1, 2017. Saunders replaces UWF President Dr. Judith Bense, who retires at the end of the year. The offer of employment is contingent upon the completion of a successful background screen and subject to confirmation by the Florida Board of Governors.

In the official press release, Board of Trustee Chair Lewis Bear said, "We had four great candidates. It's a shame that we can't put them together as a team, but the University of West Florida is the winner in our selection."

For Saunders, this will be her third time to lead a university. She served as Chancellor of the University of Wisconsin-Whitewater from 2005 to 2007 and President of the University of Southern Mississippi from 2007 to 2012. Saunders returned to UWF in 2013 and served as provost and executive vice president.

"I'm thrilled and honored," Dr. Saunders told Inweekly. "It has been a long and kind of tedious process, but it was worth it.

Every step of the way."

The UWF presidential search had been on accelerated pace since August, a pace that isn't uncommon in Florida. On Aug. 16, the search committee selected 19 applicants for interviews. The applicants had one-hour interviews on campus from Aug. 29-31.

On Sept. 6, the UWF Presidential Search Committee met and recommended four finalists to visit campus Sept. 12-14.

The finalists were Frank Ashley, a senior vice president at The College Board; State Sen. Don Gaetz, former Senate president and Okaloosa County School Superintendent; Saunders; and Mike Sherman, University of Akron's vice president of innovation and economic development.

Two weeks later, Sept. 12-14, the four finalists visited campus. On Sept. 15, the UWF

66

Board of Trustees voted on the new president.

Saunders told Inweekly that the pace of the search may have seemed quick, but it has to be to protect the careers of the applicants.

"Well, you know, searches are tricky," she said. "Certainly in the public sector, everything is out in the open and in Florida, with our very stringent Sunshine laws, there are lots of people out there that would have an interest, but that also have other jobs, and so it is not unusual for a search to kind of be silent for awhile and then move as quickly as possible so that applicants aren't vulnerable."

The finalist that drew the most criticism was Gaetz. The UWF Faculty Senate passed a resolution not supporting Sen. Gaetz for president and recommending the UWF Presidential Search Committee and Board of Trustees select one of three remaining finalists instead.

The Florida League of Women Voters also spoke out against Gaetz. League president Pamela Goodman appeared on "Pensacola Speaks" and outlined the League's legal battle to get the State Legislature to comply with the Fair Districts amendment and Gaetz's role in the district map that was eventually thrown out by the courts.

"I used to run a billion and a half dollar corporation, hired and fired people everyday," said Goodman. "When you hire someone of this sort of magnitude to take on this kind of responsibility for business, academia, or any kind of large organization, we would hope that the board would do their due diligence and not overlook or conveniently forget these kinds of facts."

She said her objection to Gaetz being named UWF president was not a personal vendetta between the state senator and her or the League of Women Voters of Florida.

"Truly, this is about 3.1 million people that voted on fair districts way back in 2010," she said. "The fact that the legislature led in the Senate by Senator Don Gaetz basically flipped their finger at them, laughed at them and absolutely refused to follow their mandates."

Goodman said, "I'm not sure that a person who did that in a high government position is someone we want leading one of our premier universities in the state of Florida."

On Sept. 15, the UWF Presidential Search Committee met first. Chairman Mort O'Sullivan asked the board to forward all four finalists to the Board of Trustees for consideration.

Committee members Christopher Thrasher and Scott Keller objected to including Gaetz, citing concerns over his lack of higher education experience.

Pensacola City Council P.C. Wu defended Gaetz and pointed out how many politicians have become university presidents in the state of Florida, such as Frank Brogan, Betty Castor, T.K. Weatherall and John Trasher.

Committee member Steve Riggs spoke in favor of Gaetz, believing he would take UWF further over the next five years than any other finalist.

"This man will get this university ahead faster and quicker," said Riggs of Gaetz.

Dr. Rick Harper, who has worked under both Gaetz and Saunders, discounted the criticisms coming from his fellow faculty members. He talked about how Gaetz had led very successful legislative programs through the legislature and built coalitions in Tallahassee. He said all four should be sent forward.

By a 12-7 vote, the search committee agreed to send all four finalists to the Board of Trustees.

The University of West Florida Board of Trustees convened 15 minutes after the search committee adjourned. After the public commented, the trustees each spoke about the finalists and the process.

Several talked about the "nastiness" of the process, referring to the negative criticism that Gaetz received. O'Sullivan was critical of the Faculty Senate voting on the UWF presidency before the four finalists visited the campus to meet the facility, staff and community.

Trustee Suzanne Lewis said that she was called yesterday by the consultant and asked to rank her choices. She didn't say who was on the other side on the line, but Lewis said it caught her off guard and disturbed her.

Trustee Greg Britton said that he would vote for Dr. Saunders. Trustee Dave Cleveland described Saunders as the "ideal candidate."

Chairman Lewis Bear was upset that there had been a widespread campaign to assassinate the character of a candidate— meaning, but not saying Don Gaetz.

"What are we teaching our children?

Are we teaching them to be honest and forthright? Or are we teaching them to be sneaky and dishonest?" said Bear. "We've done an injustice to youth by spreading false rumors."

In the end, the Board of Trustees selected Saunders by a 9-4 vote. The board then passed a resolution to make Saunders the unanimous choice.

After meeting, Inweekly learned that Gov. Rick Scott weighed in on the selection of the new University of West Florida president. On Wednesday, he called several trustees. The governor did not tell them or their employers that he was against Gaetz, only that he thought Saunders was an excellent candidate.

Some were told by others that the State Board of Governors would reject Gaetz if he was passed forward as the next president – which would have taken a two-thirds vote.

The pressure from Gov. Scott turned what was expected to be a close vote to a landslide for Saunders.

State Sen. Gaetz was magnanimous and refused to comment on the governor's possible intervention.

He told The News Service of Florida, "I was honored to be nominated and privileged to even be considered. I think the trustees made an excellent selection in Dr. Saunders. I know her. I have worked with her. And I admire her, and I wish her and the university the very best." {in}

inweekly.net

MORE PAYOUTS AT CITY HALL

Bill Reynolds

By Rick Outzen According to public records released last week, Pensacola Mayor Ashton Hayward cut checks for over $95,000 to get his former city administrator to dismiss his lawsuit against the City.

The Pensacola City Council did not approve the settlement agreement. In fact, they were never notified that a settlement had been reached nearly a year ago.

The settlement was not in Reynolds’ personnel file or filed with the Clerk of Court when the former administrator withdrew his lawsuit against the City of Pensacola. Inweekly discovered the settlement agreement after the city released the case file on the lawsuit.

On July 8, 2013, Mayor Ashton Hayward announced his decision to terminate City Administrator Bill Reynolds from his position with the city.

“Last week, I received the disappointing news from the State Attorney’s Office that Bill Reynolds chose to leak a confidential employee complaint,” said the mayor.

“The wellbeing of the City’s hardworking employees is one of my top priorities. Mr.

Reynolds’ actions violated this sacred responsibility. This is unacceptable to me.”

The State Attorney’s Office had investigated how an employee’s allegations against former Chief of Staff John Asmar, Reynolds’ political rival, had been leaked to former Pensacola Council President Maren DeWeese.

After DeWeese published the allegations, Mayor Hayward put Reynolds in charge of the investigation of the leak, and the city administrator promised the council he would find and punish the source. The mayor hired the Allen, Norton & Blue law firm to help with the investigation. After three months of searching office computers and desks and questioning city employees, the source was not discovered.

In June 2013, DeWeese told the State Attorney’s Office that Reynolds gave her the complaint, unsolicited, at the World of Beer on March 5, 2013. Reynolds avoided criminal prosecution because the employee failed to ask the city to keep her allegations confidential. By the time the employee asked for confidentiality on March 7, 2013, Reynolds had already given DeWeese the documents, and they had been published on her blog.

The State Attorney’s Office concluded: “Based upon our review, we have determined that the release of the discrimination complaint

does not rise to the level of a criminal violation.

All criminal statutes are to be strictly construed in favor of the defendant. In applying that standard, we have determined that at the time the document was released it was exempt and not confidential. Therefore, the release of the complaint, while under the circumstances as described inappropriate, does not constitute a crime.”

When he was fired, Reynolds issued a statement that he was “absolutely wrong” to release the documents. Later when he applied for the Escambia County administrator position in 2014, Reynolds told the commissioners that he agreed with the mayor’s decision.

When Commissioner Grover Robinson asked about his relationship with city staff, Reynolds said, “I certainly don’t hold any animosity against the City of Pensacola. The City of Pensacola and the mayor did exactly what they should have done.”

After Board of County Commissioner decided to hire Jack Brown, Reynolds filed a lawsuit against the city. In his complaint, Reynolds asserted that he was terminated without cause and that he was not fired for misconduct as defined in his employment agreement.

Many considered the case a “slam dunk” for the City. They felt Reynolds was fired for cause—betraying the trust of the mayor, city employees and the public—and therefore wasn’t entitled to severance or the 500 hours of accrued leave the mayor had put in his contract.

On Aug. 21, 2015, Reynolds’ scheduled a deposition with Mayor Hayward. It was rescheduled for Oct. 13, 2015. However, the city settled with Reynolds two weeks before the deposition was to be taken.

In the settlement agreement, Mayor Hayward denied all the claims made by Reynolds.

He entered into the agreement to avoid further cost of litigation and to “seek to resolve all matters in controversy, disputes and causes of action between them in an amicable way.”

Reynolds agreed that he was “receiving consideration to which he would otherwise not be entitled absent entry into this agreement.”

CFO Dick Barker distributed two checks totaling $95,571—one to Reynolds for $81,113, the other to his attorney, Odom & Barlow P.A., for $14, 458. According to the agreement, Reynolds’ check constituted payment for “accrued leave and severance pay under the terms of his employment agreement.” The check to the law firm covered “any and all attorneys’ fees owed in relation to this matter.”

Reynolds voluntarily dismissed his lawsuit in late October 2015. Mayor Hayward, City Administrator Eric Olson, City Attorney Lysia Bowling and CFO Dick Barker each failed to report the settlement and disbursements to the City Council and taxpayers.

The Reynolds settlement agreement came one month after Hayward had agreed to pay his former COO Tamara Fountain $54,002 upon the “mutual termination” of her employment. The payout to Reynolds and his attorney was agreed upon one year after the mayor had given his other former administrator, Colleen Castille, $50,000 to leave the city.

Over 12 months, Mayor Hayward paid out $199,573, none of which was ever mentioned to the taxpayers who footed the bill. Legal fees fighting the Reynolds lawsuit for 16 months and the payments made to the Florida Retirement System for each put the total cost to the taxpayers close to a quarter of a million dollars.

After Mayor Hayward has refused to be interviewed, Inweekly sent him questions on Reynolds’ settlement asking for written replies. Those questions have gone unanswered.

In a written statement to the News Journal, the mayor said that the settlement of this case was within the authority of the mayor pursuant to the city code and city charter. Inweekly has requested for him to cite the sections of the city code and charter that he was referencing.

Since leaving Escambia County, Bill Reynolds has been hired as the city manager for the City of Shakopee, Minn. He started work on June 15, 2015. His starting salary was $140,000. {in}

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EARN YOUR FREE CERTIFICATE FROM THE PEOPLE’S LAW SCHOOL She added, "We have to work together. I think that's going to take, first some agreement and boards have to get involved and where we say, ‘All right do we want to just keep sheep stealing from each other or do we want to link arms and partner up with programs so that we can really attract more growth and more stability.' Opportunities are there, and I'm really looking forward to it."

WAHOOS-REDS EXTEND AGREEMENT

Rick Outzen with Bobby Bowden

COFFEE WITH BOWDEN On Sept. 14,

Inweekly shared cups of coffee with FSU coaching legend Bobby Bowden, who was in town to speak at the Greater Pensacola Chamber's annual meeting.

Coach Bowden said he didn't miss coaching. "I coached 57 straight years and just enjoyed every day of it. Then when I got out, I was very happy."

He rattled off a list of today's college coaches that impress him—Alabama's Nick Saban, FSU's Jimbo Fisher, Texas' Charlie Strong, and Ohio State's Urban Meyer. Coach Bowden also discussed what makes a good college football coach.

"He's got to be a great leader because he's got to organize hundreds of people to get them on the same page," he said. "He has to have leadership ability. He has to have something people will follow."

Coach Bowden added, "They don't follow, he ain't no leader."

SAUNDERS' PLANS Dr. Martha Saunders will become the sixth president for the University of West Florida Jan. 1, 2017. She talked with Inweekly publisher Rick Outzen on News Talk 1370 WCOA's "Pensacola Speaks" about the difference in being president instead of provost.

"I've noticed the difference between being a president and a provost is the president sets the tempo," said Saunders.

"You've got lots of people doing their work and very specialized work, but it's the president who beats the drum."

She looks forward to working with the state colleges in Northwest Florida.

"We have some really good state colleges here," she said. "I want to make appointments and sit down with those presidents and say, ‘All right now, we're in a sparsely populated part of Florida. How can we link arms and work together and really build some strength.'"

September 22, 2016

The Pensacola Blue Wahoos recently announced a two-year extension of the team's Player Development Contract with the Cincinnati Reds. This agreement will keep the Blue Wahoos as the Reds Double-A affiliate through the 2018 season.

"We have enjoyed the past five seasons with the Cincinnati Reds," said Blue Wahoos co-owner Bubba Watson. "We appreciate their partnership and look forward to continuing our relationship. We are truly happy that Cincinnati wants to stay in Pensacola to develop their players."

The partnership between Cincinnati and Pensacola allows both teams to combine their common beliefs in wanting to provide the best fan experience, high employee engagement and a strong culture in player development.

"We have a lot in common with Cincinnati," said Quint Studer. "For example, they're the smallest market in major league baseball population wise. Out of 30 AA teams, we're the third smallest market in all of AA baseball."

He continued, "They're family owned, the Castellini family. In essence, the Wahoos are what we consider family owned and local. Bob Castellini, lives in Cincinnati, of course, Bubba, Rishy, and I live here in Pensacola. They do a lot of not-for-profit work. We do a lot of not-for-profit work. In fact, the last time I talked to Bob Castellini, all he wanted to talk about was what we're learning with early brain development because he's very interested in improving education in Cincinnati."

The Blue Wahoos began their partnership with the Reds in 2012, the team's inaugural season. Over the past two seasons, the Pensacola Blue Wahoos have won the past three Southern League South Division Half Championships and posted a franchise-best 81-59 record in 2016.

After five seasons, 35 players have gone on to make their Major League debuts after time in Pensacola, 29 of which were made with Cincinnati. Players, such as Billy Hamilton, Didi Gregorius and Michael Lorenzen, have not only made an impact in Pensacola, but in Major League Baseball. {in}

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inweekly.net

by Jennifer Lee

The formula is simple.

One woman, $1,000, one vote.

"Those are the main core values," said Belle Bear, one of the founding members of IMPACT 100. "I won't let anyone change them because they work."

For 13 years, IMPACT 100 Pensacola Bay Area, Inc. has raised more than $7 million for local nonprofits in Escambia and Santa Rosa counties. And like clockwork, they're going to do it all again giving away $108,200 to 10 deserving organizations next month.

A SOUND INVESTMENT

Want to see $1,000 turn into $1 million? Just look to IMPACT. The Pensacola IMPACT 100 chapter started in 2003 when founder Debbie Ritchie read an article about a similar organization in Cincinnati, Ohio. With the help of some friends, she organized IMPACT 100 Pensacola Bay Area.

Bear recalls the local chapter came to fruition over lunch at Skopelos. The founding members discussed logistics with the original IMPACT founder, Wendy Steele, but she didn't give too many guidelines, Bear said.

"It made us have ownership," she added.

In its first year, there were 233 members. This year, the organization has grown to 1,082 women. It's the largest IMPACT group to date. Every year membership continues to rise, said Cyndi Warren, president of the board.

"This is the third year in a row that we've raised more than $1 million," Warren said.

September 22, 2016

IMPACT has a good reputation of making positive changes in the Pensacola area, which is why members come back and are able to recruit their friends.

"Some members who don't even live here anymore have stuck with us," Warren said. "They want to continue the mission."

Warren admits $1,000 is a lot of money and that some members have to make sacrifices to write the check. But considering it goes toward 10 individual grants of at least $100,000, it's a sound investment.

"For more members than not, it's a significant amount of money," Warren said.

"We've had women who ask for an IMPACT membership for their anniversary or for a Christmas present."

When you break it down, it's $83 a month, Warren added. Board member Meri DeSalvo Asmar breaks it down even further.

"It's really just $2.73 a day—less than your daily Starbucks," she said.

presentations and do site visits. Women can choose to just pay their dues and vote, but about 250 members choose to be active participants by serving on the board or one of the committees.

Asmar has served for four years as chairperson one of the focus area committees, where members narrow down the finalists.

"It is so rewarding to watch approximately 30 to 60 women meet, reviewing the grants, conducting site visits, engaging in intelligent conversation and analysis of the projects," she said.

Many women are learning more about the community they live and work in by serving on these committees.

"What's interesting is learning about organizations you didn't know existed," said publicity chair and secretary, Maria Goldberg. "It's the impact of IMPACT." In October, members have "the big meeting" and vote on the final 10 grants.

Voting machines from the supervisor of elections office are used for the final votes to make the process fair. And then, the fun part is handing out the big checks.

"It's like Christmas morning," Goldberg said.

Even after the finalists are named and the voting ends, organizations work with IMPACT to make sure they follow through on their proposed projects. The key word committee members use is "sustainable."

“What's interesting is learning about organizations you didn't know existed. It's the impact of IMPACT.” Maria Goldberg

HOW TO MAKE AN IMPACT

The IMPACT process is detailed.

There's a list of deadlines, and eligible projects must be designated to one of the focus areas—arts and culture, education, environment, recreation and preservation, family and health and wellness.

Not only do members review the submitted grant applications, but listen to

They look for projects that will have the legs to continue even after the money runs out.

"We don't just sign checks," Bear said.

"This is not like any board other board I've been on."

It's not lost on many of the women how empowering it is to be a part of IMPACT. While Warren said some men might donate money or sponsor memberships, it's truly an organization created by women and run by women.

"I recently did a presentation on women's philanthropy—how women think differently than men," Warren said. "Men want to support organizations because they like them, while women typically volunteer before they support. They want the follow-up, which falls right in line with IMPACT. Women are doing the site visits and learn about organizations and winners come back and give us updates."

Like many members, Asmar is a wife and mother with a career. It wasn't until she joined IMPACT that she realized how successful an organization run by women can be, she said.

"I work in a predominantly male industry, and it's natural to expect men to be the leaders," she said. "Most of us tend to think we are even stronger because we're all women–because women are doers. We are moms, full-time workers, caregivers to our parents, community volunteers, and we're used to juggling all that to get it done."

WHAT THE NONPROFITS SAY

In its 12 years, IMPACT has funded 77 projects in Escambia and Santa Rosa counties. And that's not including the 10 grants 11

that will be awarded this year. Drive around the community and you'll probably notice IMPACT 100 logos at museums, parks, playgrounds—you name it.

"I was at the museum (Pensacola Museum of Art) for the Suite Soiree and I just looked up at the lights and at the floors... both of those were funded with IMPACT grants," Bear said.

Raven Holloway, executive director of the Pensacola Museum of Art, said projects like new lights and floors "wouldn't have been an option" without IMPACT. "We probably would've had to wait for something major to happen," she said.

IMPACT helped Ballet Pensacola purchase a new production system, which included a lighting system and the necessary tools to control it.

"The women of IMPACT have provided dancers with the opportunity to perform in shows with the highest production levels," said Richard Steinert, Ballet Pensacola's Artistic Director.

Funds received by Children's Home Society of Florida last year helped the nonprofit partner with Escambia County Clinics and Weis Community School to build a playground on Weis's campus.

"Our community's children are now able to play safely like their peers in other neighborhoods do," said Tim Putman, executive director of CHS. "For that, I am grateful."

The Veteran's Memorial Park was also a grant winner last year and used funds to improve drainage issues and provide a solid foundation to better serve those in wheelchairs or other mobility issues.

"It's a win-win for our foundation, the park and the community," said W.A. "Butch" Hansen, president of the Veterans Memorial Park Foundation.

Jamie Cochran, outreach coordinator with Lutheran Services of Florida, said their shelter was in dire need of reliable transportation before they were awarded an IMPACT grant last year. The funds went to purchasing a minibus and minivan so that kids could be transported safely to home visits, doctor appointments and fun outings.

"We can't say anything negative about IMPACT," Cochran said.

These are just a few of the organizations that have been touched by IMPACT.

MOVING FORWARD

This is Warren's last year as board president, but certainly not her last with IMPACT, she said.

"It's bittersweet ... I've been on the board for seven years," she said. "I'll be on the board for one more year. It means a lot to me. I've learned so much about this community."

Asmar said Warren brought to the table, "strong leadership, knowledge-based decisions, a detailed eye and moral compass" that helped IMPACT continue in the right direction.

"Cyndi's professional expertise as a CPA and previous experience as our treasurer enabled her to really understand the fine details of the grant process and how we disburse funds to make sure we were watchful stewards of our members' money," added Asmar.

Asmar will begin serving as president starting in October. There's no paid staff for the organization, but that doesn't mean these women don't take the job seriously.

IMPACT's version of passing the baton is likely moving boxes from one office to another.

"We don't have an IMPACT office," Warren said. "I have an extra cube at my office to store materials. And it will probably be moved to the next president's office."

The organization is always looking forward, which is why they implemented a mentor program this year, which pairs new members with seasoned members.

"We noticed when whenever we had firstyear members who didn't rejoin, they said they didn't feel connected," Warren said. "So we wanted to change that. Every 100 people we have is another grant we can fund."

While it was never intended to be a social organization, a lot of women have made deep connections with fellow members. And it all started because they wanted to give back to their community.

"I know I've made lasting friendships," Warren said. "You appreciate these women for the knowledge and passion they have. You come together and help the community… it really does make you want to spend more time with these ladies." {in}

“Our community's children are now able to play safely like their peers in other neighborhoods do.” Tim Putman

2016 IMPACT 100 FINALISTS

Ten of these fifteen finalists will receive a grant of $108,200 at IMPACT 100’s annual meeting on Sunday, October 16.

provide and purchase equipment needed for the hydroponic growing system.

Details: arc-gateway.org

Arts & Culture

Florida Institute for Human and Machine Cognition, Inc. Project: Interactive displays at IHMC's research facility. Funding will provide for the design and installation of 23 touch screen computers with high-impact displays, 10 HoloLens augmented reality displays, two robotic arms, virtual reality headsets, and other equipment to allow for self-guided tours of IHMC research accomplishments.

Details: ihmc.us

Gulf Coast Kiln Walk Society, Inc. Project: The Gulf Coast Kiln Walk Historical Center. The Center will provide a secure location for the display of the GCKWS permanent collection of ceramic art and historically significant ceramic artifacts while providing a location for ceramic art exhibitions, and a secure space for equipment, materials, and instruction through hands-on experience, lectures, and video presentations.

Details: kilnwalk.org The Santa Rosa County Creek Indian Tribe, Inc. Project: Construction of a permanent Native American Cultural Center that will provide a setting better suited for teaching about Native American culture.

A multi-purpose room, a covered area, an artifact museum and a genealogy resource center will be the focal points of the center.

Details: srccreektribe.org St. John's Cemetery Historical and Educational Foundation, Inc. Project: Create an "outdoor museum" at the cemetery by refurbishing the existing gatehouse, purchase benches and interpretive signage for the cemetery, and purchase a State of Florida Historical Marker as well as road signage to direct visitors to the museum. The refurbished gatehouse will transform that part of the property into a community meeting room for visitors and small groups.

Details: stjohnsdb.com

Education

The Arc Gateway, Inc. Project: Reopen Jeff's Corner Garden at Arc Gateway's new location. Jeff's Corner Garden will be a hydroponic greenhouse, expanding the existing horticultural education program. Funds will be used to hire a horticultural/nursery manager to

Milk and Honey Outreach Ministries, Inc. Project: Build a classroom for GEMS (Girls Embracing a More Excellent Way) program and other after school activities. The GEMS program is designed for economically disadvantaged African-American preteen and teenage girls. The girls participate in a year-long program that focuses on the positive aspects of being African-American and female while stressing the realities of AIDS, teenage pregnancy, and disease.

Details: milkandhoneyoutreach.org

Environment, Recreation & Preservation

Navarre Beach Marine Science Station Project: Coastal Conservation Corp. Funds will be used to purchase a 24-foot trailer and the structural modifications and equipment needed to implement the creation of "Discovery Depot," a mobile conservation vehicle outfitted with state of the art exhibits and a touch tank with marine animals found in the Gulf of Mexico.

Details: navarresciencestation.org The First Tee of Northwest Florida Project: Golf and Life Skills Training Facility.

Funds will be used to renovate four batting cages at the facility and transform them into netted hitting bays for full-swing practice; build a short-game practice area with a 9-hole artificial chipping/pitching green and practice bunker, and renovate and reopen all 36 holes of the former Goofy Golf course.

Details: thefirstteenwflorida.org

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www.attorneygenemitchell.com 2016 IMPACT 100 Finalists / Photo by Hana Frenette The Pensacola Rowing Club, Inc. Project: Youth Rowing Program. Funds will be used for the acquisition of a variety of safe, dependable, long-lasting rowing shells, rowing machines, oars, and other rowing equipment. The equipment will be used for the youth as well as the training and certification of PRC staff so that they can meet U.S. Rowing standards in order to participate in the National Juniors program competitively.

The funds will also be used for marketing and promotion of the Pensacola Rowing Club Youth Rowing program.

Details: pensacolarowing.org

Family

Goodwill Easter Seals of the Gulf Coast Project: Youth Excelling for Success (YES). The program will offer intensive assistance to a group of 30 young people, ages 16-24, in the low to moderate income range so that they may enter adulthood prepared to be self-supporting. Funding will pay the first year of instructor salary, purchase all materials and supplies for startup, and provide classroom furnishings and equipment such as computers and audio-visual equipment.

Details: gesgc.org Manna Food Pantries Project: Tools to fight hunger. MANNA is seeking funding from IMPACT 100 for the development and delivery of a user-friendly web-based application that includes a Client, Donor and Food Inventory management system, plus hardware, that will provide the tools needed to fight hunger. Funds will be used for software hosting and replacing outdated equipment.

Details: mannafoodpantries.org Studer Community Institute, Inc. Project: IMPACT Brain Bags. Funds will be used to provide IMPACT Brain Bags to every parent of a newborn in Escambia County, as they leave the hospital, to help explain the importance of talking with their babies. The bags will contain print and multimedia tools to help parents nurture their children's language development by using the guidelines of the successful Thirty Million Words September 22, 2016

Initiative and other programs currently in use elsewhere in the state.

Details: studeri.org

Health and Wellness

PACE Center for Girls, Inc. Project: Transportation to execute Reach program. Funds will be used to purchase four new vans to transport girls enrolled in Reach Escambia/SantaRosa.

Reach Escambia/Santa Rosa will provide counseling and support services to a minimum of 80 girls per year and will target girls ages 11-17 who are experiencing personal, family or school issues. The services of the program include: counseling, goal planning, behavior modification, case management, vocational empowerment and enrichment lab.

Details: pacecenter.org The EscaRosa Coalition for the Homeless, Inc. Project: Street Outreach Housing First Accessibility. Funds would be used to purchase two new vans, one of which will be refitted for a wheelchair. The new transportation will allow the street outreach team to expand their reach and also to provide immediate transportation for individuals experiencing homelessness in the City of Pensacola, Escambia County and Santa Rosa County. IMPACT funding will also provide four iPads and data plans, which will be used for immediate on-site assessment, intake and reporting.

Details: escarosa.wordpress.com Escambia Search and Rescue, Inc. Project: Sea, Air and Land Capabilities Improvement Initiative. Funds would be used to purchase a 1999 22-foot Boston Whaler with a trailer; two unmanned aerial vehicles (UAV's) and associated equipment; five anti-exposure suits for ESAR boat crew personnel; 10 auto-inflatable personal flotation devices for crew members; 400 infant and youth sized personal flotation devices to be given away at various public events; and 12 Project Lifesaver Response Systems. Through this project, ESAR will dramatically increase their capabilities on sea, air and land.

Details: esar.com 13

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WEEK OF SEPTEMBER 22 - 29

Arts & Entertainment art, film, music, stage, books and other signs of civilization...

Drop Dead And Bless Your Heart

by Hamishe Randall

In the South, sugar is to tea what crazy is to family—a main ingredient. And what brings out the crazy in a family faster than the holidays? A death, of course.

After Bud drops dead at the kitchen table, the Turpin family comes together for his funeral and proves how crazy—and hilarious— family can be.

Written by David Bottrell and Jessie Jones, the dark comedy, Dearly Departed, comes to

September 22, 2016

Pensacola Little Theatre this weekend with a mission: to make you laugh.

According to director Maureen McNeill, the main reason she wanted to bring the play to Pensacola is its message is relatable and important.

“William Finn, who is a Broadway musical artist, was quoted as saying, ‘laughter builds strong bones,’ and I think that’s why we needed this show,” said McNeill. “Death is the inescapable thing—death and taxes right—but for whatever reason, society has this hang-up about it. It always carries so much weight, and this is a great opportunity to look at something that everyone is going to have to experience somewhere along the way and to be able to put that in a humorous context is really important.”

Pensacola is a unique part of the South, and according to McNeill, this play specifically has much of Pensacola’s voice.

Newly widowed Raynelle, played by Michelle Hancock, and first-born son Ray-Bud, played by Michael Daw, lead in this funny

All the while you’re laughing at the fiasco of a family gathering. You might just bible-thumping, obnoxiously singing, recognize yourself or your family in these charfamily-gossiping characters, you may be acters on stage. surprised to see some honest-to-goodness “We embrace the image that we see in true love portrayed in this play. Renee the mirror, and that’s what makes it so great,” Jordan plays Veda, an elderly over-the-top said McNeill. “These characters are very much complainer—we all know the type. But deinvolved in each others business. It’s that spite Veda’s diatribe of the woes of having southern tradition of ‘well it’s not gossip, I’m to do everything for her husband, Norval, just keeping track,’ so because of that we let it who is played by Billy Buff, Veda demonall hang out. If we are as honest as we can be, strates what love really means. then in that honesty we can play more with “Because Reynelle loses her husband pushing that envelope, of maybe making that in the beginning, Veda is a really good off-color statement; because there are some testament to enjoying the life you have and things that could put people on the edge of enjoying the people you have in your life,” their seat in this show, but that’s one of the said Jordan. “You only get one life. You reasons we like it.” really have to cultivate the relationships But don’t be fooled by the slow, easy worth cultivating and realize it can be gone pace of these Southern-talkers’ accents, the just like that, and that’s why I like this play, scenes are just as fast-paced and actionpacked as life itself. The fifteen-member cast its very reflective of that.”

Jordan also grew up in the South, so she portrays the Turpin clan as they gather for heard “bless her heart” often growing up. the funeral, and make it through the whole According to Jordan, every now and again event without killing each other. Like any we need to realize that Southern culture is family reunion, in retrospect it can be funny. amazing, beautiful, and dynamic. {in} Daw, born and raised in the South, relates to the play, and sees his own family in its characters. According to Daw, this play works through serious topics like failed businesses, infidelity in relationships, miscarriages, WHEN: 7:30 p.m. Friday, Sept. 23; Saturday, sorrow, stereotypes, economics, Sept. 24, 3 p.m.; Sunday, Sept. 25, 7:30 p.m.; and death. But this dark comedy is Thursday, Sept. 29- Saturday, Oct. 1, 3 p.m. anything but serious.

Sunday, Oct. 2 “This play is proof that I can laugh WHERE: Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. at myself, too,” said Daw. “I believe Jefferson St. you should be allowed to make fun of COST: $12-30 anything if you’re willing to make fun DETAILS: pensacolalittletheatre.com of yourself.”

DEARLY DEPARTED

15

calendar THURSDAY 9.22

Five Facts about Garrison Keillor

EMERALD COAST BUSINESS LEADERS 7:309 a.m. Networking for business leaders.

Guests welcome. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org WORK ON FLORIDA TRAIL 8 a.m. Regular meet up of Western Gate Florida Trail Association to work on National Scenic Trail and side trail. Meet at Blackwater River Forestry Center, 11650 Munson Highway. meetup.com/ftawesterngate WINE TASTING AT AWM 5 p.m. Aragon Wine Market, 27 S. 9th Ave. aragonwinemarket.com

By Jennifer Leigh

1. THE WRITER'S ALMANAC WITH GARRISON KEILLOR WUWF listeners catching up on morning news would probably recognize Keillor's voice after a familiar piano tune, which announces The Writer's Almanac.

The Minnesota Public Radio show began in 1993 and includes short snippets of history and readings of poetry. Keillor records a week's worth of shows at one time. He always ends each 5-minute show with "Be well, do good work and keep in touch."

MUSIC UNDER THE STARS WITH EDWARD DAVID ANDERSON 5-9:30 p.m. $10. From

the Ground Up Community Garden, 501 N. Hayne St. eventbrite.com

ONBIKES WINTER WONDER RIDE REGISTRATION 6-8 p.m. Old Hickory Whiskey Bar,

123 S. Palafox. onbikespensacola.org

GHOST TALES EXPLORED WITH PROFESSOR ALAN BROWN 6 p.m. Free. Presentation of

Alabama’s colleges and universities have generated a body of ghost lore that reflects the state’s long history of higher education, war and racial strife. Pensacola State College, Bldg. 2 Room 252, 1000 College Blvd.

NATURAL HEALING/CANCER STUDY 6-8:30 p.m. Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org DANCE LESSONS 6:30 p.m. Ballroom, Swing, and Country. Professional partner dance instruction for all skill levels. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. $10. dancecraftfl.com FM WESTON AUDUBON SOCIETY'S MONTHY MEETING 7-9 p.m. Pensacola State College,

Baroco Science Center, Bldg. 21, Room 2142.

FRIDAY 9.23

Garrison Keillor / Courtesy Photo Fans of the popular radio show "Prairie Home Companion" (PHC) probably don't need to be reminded that the show's creator, Garrison Keillor, will be performing at the Saenger this week.

What some folks may not know, is that Keillor is also known for his books, music and even as the host of a different radio show.

Since Keillor retired from PHC earlier this summer after hosting the show for 42 years, it's nice to know where else you can find him.

Here's a few facts about Keillor and his work.

2. COMMON GOOD BOOKS It would only make sense that a prolific writer like Keillor would also be the proprietor of a bookstore, although you likely won't catch him stocking shelves.

The store was originally tucked below a coffee shop before it's popularity grew and it reopened on Snelling Avenue in St. Paul, Michigan.

3. SONGS OF A CAT It would be no surprise that Keillor has a music album, he sang every week while on PHC. But, maybe you've never checked out "Songs of a Cat." A 16-song album that includes little ditties such as "Cat, You Better Come Home" and "My Grandmother's Cat."

4. BOOKS ON BOOKS ON BOOKS If you miss Keillor's humor and way with words, there's plenty of works to indulge in. Keillor has written 21 books, many about the famed, fictitious town of Lake Wobegon, as well as three books of poetry.

Keillor also wrote the screenplay for the movie version of "Prairie Home Companion," which he appears in, and stars Lindsay Lohan — yep that Lindsay Lohan.

5. GARY EDWARD KEILLOR Keillor was born Gary Edward Keillor and started to use the name Garrison Keillor as a pen name when he began writing as a young teenager. He's written commentary and reviews for various media and most recently opined about Hillary Clinton's illness for the Washington Post. "What some people see as a relentless quest for power strikes me as the good habits of a serious Methodist," he wrote.

GARRISON KEILLOR

WHEN: 7 p.m. Monday, Sept. 26 WHERE: Saenger Theatre, 118 S. Palafox.

COST: $51-$78 DETAILS: garrisonkeillor.com, pensacolasaenger.com

PILATES MAT WITH EMILY 1:30-2:30 p.m.

Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org WINE TASTING 3-6 p.m. Free. Ever'man Cooperative Grocery, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org WINE TASTING 5-7 p.m. Free. City Grocery, 2050 N. 12th Ave. HAPPY HOUR COOK OUTS 5 p.m. Drink specials, free cookout. Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. sevillequarter.com VINYASA YOGA 6-7 p.m. Free Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St.

Let’s Wine!

Free Wine Tasting Every Thursday AWM 5pm - 7pm

27 S. 9th Ave. | 850•433•9463 AragonWineMarket.com 616 1

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DATE NIGHT DANCING 6:30-8:30 p.m.

Learn the basics of several romantic ballroom and country-dance styles in unique group classes that keep partners together.

DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. $10. dancecraftfl.com 'EL REGRESO' FILM SCREENING 7 p.m. Free Hispanic Film Festival, Pensacola State College, Bldg. 2. 1000 College Blvd.

COUPLES COOK: BRAZILIAN FLAVORS 7-9

p.m. $50 per couple. Pensacola Cooks, 3670 Barrancas Ave. cookingschoolsofamerica.com/pensacolacooks OPEN MIC 7-11 p.m. Single Fin Cafe, 380 N. 9th Ave. facebook.com/SingleFinCafe THE RETURN: THE BEST OF THE EARLY BEATLES 8 p.m. $20. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S.

Palafox. vinylmusichall.com

THE CLASSIC ROCK EXPERIENCE: 70s ARENA TRIBUTE 7:30 p.m. $19.95-$38. Saenger The-

atre, 118 S. Palafox. pensacolasaenger.com

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DEARLY DEPARTED 7:30 p.m. $12-$30. Pen-

sacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St.

SATURDAY 9.24

SANTA ROSA FARMERS MARKET 8 a.m.-1

p.m. Fresh local produce, honey, baked goods and live music. Pace Presbyterian Church, Woodbine Road, Pace.

CLEAN UP AT FORT PICKENS 8:45 a.m. All supplies are provided. Meet at the fishing pier parking lot at the very end of Fort Pick-

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calendar ens Road, 7-8 miles from the park entrance.

For more information, contact oceanhourfl@gmail.com or baybluffscleanup@ gmail.com.

PALAFOX MARKET 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Fresh produce, live plants, baked goods, fine art and antiques are just a few of the items offered at the weekly Palafox Market.

Items originate directly from participating vendors, including dozens of local farmers, home gardeners and area artists. Martin Luther King Jr. Plaza, N. Palafox. palafoxmarket.com COOKING DEMONSTRATIONS 9 a.m.-2 p.m.

"Eat with the Seasons." Palafox Market.

Martin Luther King Jr. Plaza, N. Palafox. palafoxmarket.com FRENCH WINE DINNER WITH JEAN-FRANCOIS CHRISTINI 6-8 p.m. $80 per person.

SoGourmet, 407-D S. Palafox. sogourmetpensacola.com

THE WILDFLOWERS- A TRIBUTE TO TOM PETTY AND THE HEARTBREAKERS 8 p.m.

$10. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S. Palafox. vinylmusichall.com GUITAR FOUNDATION OF AMERICA WINNER THIBAUT GARCIA 7:30-9:30 p.m.

$7-$11 free for PSC students. Ashmore Fine Arts Center, 1000 College Blvd.

DEARLY DEPARTED 7:30 p.m. $12-$30. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. DANCE PARTY 8-midnight. Strictly ballroom. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. $10. dancecraftfl.com

SUNDAY 9.25

WAKE UP HIKE 7 a.m. Meet at Bay Bluffs Park, Scenic Highway at Summit Ave., for a brisk one to two-hour walk with brunch to follow at an area restaurant.

RELAX AND RESTORE WITH CHRISTINA SONNIER 2-4 p.m. $20. Breathe Downtown,

505 S. Adams St.

SOAPMAKING 101 2-4 p.m. Free. Ever'man

Education Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org COMPOSERFEST 2:30-4:30 p.m. Free. Pensacola State College, 1000 College Blvd.

DEARLY DEPARTED 3 p.m. $12-$30. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. FULL MOON MEDITATION 6:15-8:30 p.m.

Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org

MONDAY 9.26

PILATES MAT WITH EMILY 1:30-2:30 p.m.

Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org SEVILLE QUARTER MILERS 5:30 p.m. Runners meet in front of Seville Quarter for a run around downtown Pensacola. Free pasta and drink specials after the run at Fast Eddie's. Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. sevillequarter.com MAX & IGOR CAVALERA RETURN TO THE ROOTS 6 p.m. $20. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S.

Palafox. vinylmusichall.com

LET YOUR LIGHT SHINE FOR CHILDREN IN

CRISIS 6 p.m. $50 per person. Museum of

Commerce, 201 E. Zaragosa. Proceeds benefit Children in Crisis. childrenincrisisfl.org GARRISON KEILLOR 7 p.m. $51-$78. Saenger Theatre, 118 S. Palafox. pensacolasaenger. com FOUND DROWNED (BLOOMINGTON), SPLATTER, KENT STANTON 9:30 p.m.-12:30

a.m. Sluggo's, 101 S. Jefferson St. facebook. com/sluggospensacola

Band. Gulfside Pavilion, Pensacola Beach. visitpensacolabeach.com MEDITATION /PRANIC HEALING 7:15-8:30 p.m. Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org TUNESDAY SOUND CAFE 7:30 p.m. Enjoy a cup of coffee or tea and tunes from the baby grand piano. Pensacola Library lobby, 239 North Spring St.

WEDNESDAY 9.28

TUESDAY 9.27

LUNCH AND LEARN: PASTA TUESDAY 11:30

a.m.-12:45 p.m. $25. SoGourmet, 407-D S. Palafox. sogourmetpensacola.com WINE DOWN, DOWNTOWN 5-7 p.m. Free.

SoGourmet, 407-D S. Palafox. sogourmetpensacola.com FUNKY YOGA FLOW 6-7 p.m. Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org DANCE LESSONS 6:30 p.m. Country, Swing, and Ballroom. Professional partner dance instruction for all skill levels. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. $10. dancecraftfl.com STRUT YOUR MUTT 6:45 p.m. Join fellow dog walkers for a 45-minute stroll in East Hill. Dogs must be leashed and well behaved. Walkers meet at entrance to Bayview Dog Park at 20th Ave and E. Lloyd St. SARAH JAROSZ, PARKER MILLSAP 7 p.m. $20. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S. Palafox. vinylmusichall.com BANDS ON THE BEACH 7-9 p.m. Ben Loftin

REIKI FOR PETS ON THE LAWN 5-6 p.m.

Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org VINO MAGNIFICO 5:30 p.m. $10. V. Paul's Italian Ristorante, 29 S. Palafox.

WATERBOYZ SLOW SKATE 6-7 p.m. Every Wednesday. Skate starts and ends at Waterboyz, 380 N. 9th Ave. waterboyz.com RESTORATIVE YOGA 6-7 p.m. Free.

Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org DANCE LESSONS 6:30 p.m. West Coast Swing. Professional partner dance instruction for all skill levels. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. $10. dancecraftfl.com MEDITATION 7:15-8:30 p.m. Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org DANCE PARTY 8-10 p.m. A mix of swing, country, and ballroom music for partner dancing on the best wood dance floor in the area. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. $10. dancecraftfl.com

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September 22, 2016

17

DIFFERENCE MAKERS DR. MARTHA SAUNDERS NAMED SIXTH PRESIDENT OF THE UNIVERSITY OF WEST FLORIDA The University of West Florida Board of Trustees named Dr. Martha Saunders the sixth president of the University, effective Jan. 1, 2017. Saunders will replace UWF President Dr. Judith Bense, who is set to retire on Dec. 31, 2016. The offer of employment is contingent upon the completion of a successful background screen and subject to confirmation by the Florida Board of Governors.

“This was a fair, robust campaign,” said Board of Trustee chair Lewis Bear. “We had four great candidates. It’s a shame that we can’t put them together as a team, but the University of West Florida is the winner in our selection. We have a unanimously approved resolution, which indicates full support from the Board of Trustees and we look forward to working with President Martha Saunders. We also thank the other three candidates for their interest in the University and wish them the best.”

Saunders, a UWF faculty member and administrator from 1984 to 2002, returned to the University in 2013 and currently serves as provost and executive vice president. In this role, she functions as the University’s chief academic officer and vice president for the Division of Academic Affairs, as well as the chief operating officer with oversight over all University divisions.

Saunders will begin as President in January 2017, marking her third time leading a university. She served as Chancellor at the University of Wisconsin-Whitewater from 2005 to 2007 and President at the University of Southern Mississippi from 2007 to 2012.

“I’m thrilled and honored beyond belief,” said Dr. Martha Saunders. “It has been a long and arduous process, but UWF is worth it.”

In addition to her leadership roles at Southern Mississippi and Wisconsin-Whitewater, she also served as provost and vice president for academic affairs at Columbus State University from 2002 to 2005.

Saunders began her career at UWF in 1984 as a professor in the Department of Communication Arts, where she then became coordinator of the Public Relations Program. She also served as director of the University Honors Program and associate dean of the College of Arts and Social Sciences from 1996 to 1999. In 2000, she was named dean of the UWF College of Arts and Sciences.

She received a bachelor’s degree in French from the University of Southern Mississippi, a master’s degree in journalism from the University of Georgia and a doctorate in communication theory and research from Florida State University.

To learn more about Saunders and the UWF Presidential Search, visit uwf.edu/presidentialsearch.

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news of the weird INSANITY DEFINED Police and prosecutors in Dallas, appropriately sensitive at having been the site of the 1963 killing of President Kennedy, have apparently taken out their shame on assassination buff Robert Groden. As the Dallas Observer reported in September, Groden has been ticketed by police dozens of times for operating book sales booths near the "grassy knoll" (site of the alleged "second shooter" of the president)—and yet he prevails in court every single time (82 straight, and counting). (Tip for visitors from the Observer: Never publicly utter "grassy knoll" in Dallas, as it seems particularly to offend the police.)

THE CONTINUING CRISIS Stephen Mader, 25, native of Weirton, West Virginia, and former Weirton police officer, is fighting to get his job back after being fired for not being quick enough on the trigger.

When Ronald Williams Jr., in May, made a ham-handed attempt at "suicide by cop," it was Mader who, rather than shooting, tried to talk Williams down (based on his Marine Corps and police academy training), but when Williams pointed his unloaded gun at two of Mader's colleagues, and one of them quickly shot the man to death, police officials fired Mader for having been insufficiently aggressive.

SUSPICIONS CONFIRMED Master baker Stefan Fischer filed a lawsuit recently against Bakery of New York for wrongful firing— because he refused to use "bug-infested" flour to make batches of bread. According to Fischer, when he informed management of the bugs in the facility's 3,000-pound flour silo, he was told simply to make "multigrain" bread, which Fischer took to mean that fewer diners would complain if they heard "crunching" while eating multigrain.

LEADING ECONOMIC INDICATORS News Corporation Australia reported in September the enviable success of a 16-yearold British entrepreneur, Ms. Beau Jessup,

by Chuck Shepherd

who has so far earned about $84,000 with a simple online app to help rich Chinese parents select prosperous-sounding English names for their babies. Users choose among 12 personality traits they hope their baby to have, then receive three suggestions (including a list of famous people with those names). Jessup got the idea when living in China and noticing that some babies of the rich were given lame names, such as "Gandalf" and "Cinderella."

C O M I N G S E P T E M B E R 2 0 TH

WEIRD SCIENCE Trees talk to each other and recognize their offspring, according to Australian ecology researcher Suzanne Simard (most recently lecturing on the influential video series TED Talks). Trees are not independent organisms but belong to arboreal "families" with characteristics identifying them to other family members. According to Dr. Simard, "mother" trees that ordinarily expand their roots wildly may hold back to give nearby "kinfolk" tree roots a chance to spread. Using "isotope tracing," she learned of trees passing healthful carbon, via fungi, to neighboring family seedlings, which she said renders the seedlings more resistant to future stress.

CAN'T STOP MYSELF (1) The lifelong pickpocket known as "Auntie Sato," 83, who has spent nearly 30 years of her life behind bars, was sentenced again (two years, six months) in August for a purse-snatching from a traveler in Tokyo's Ueno Station. "Why," asked the judge, does Auntie Sato keep at it, especially since she also owns property and has rental income. Said she, "I thought about (stopping)," but "gave up." "It's hopeless." (2) Faisal Shaikh, awaiting his cellphone theft case to be called at the Thane sessions court in Mumbai, India, in August (one of several theft charges pending), wandered up to the court stenographer's desk and swiped her cellphone. He was apprehended shortly afterward near the courthouse. {in}

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Send your weird news to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa, Fla., 33679 or weirdnews@earthlink.net, or go to newsoftheweird.com

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