Inweekly March 26 2020 Issue by Inweekly

Independent News | March 26, 2020 | Volume 21 | Number 13

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winners & losers

outtakes

news

We're currently bleeding capital by the day, as I know many others are.

buzz

a&e 11

publisher Rick Outzen

graphic designer Tim Bednarczyk

editor & creative director Joani Delezen

contributing writers Savannah Evanoff, Jennifer Leigh, Jeremy Morrison, C.S. Satterwhite

community board 14

Independent News is published by Inweekly Media, Inc., P.O. Box 12082, Pensacola, FL 32591. (850)438-8115. All materials published in Independent News are copyrighted. © 2018 Inweekly Media, Inc. All rights reserved.

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March 26, 2020

winners & losers

Nikki Fried / Photo courtesy of Florida Department of Agriculture

In times of crisis, we pull together to make tough decisions and help each other. Inweekly wants to recognize some individuals and organizations who have stepped up to meet the COVID-19 pandemic this past week by doing a all-winners edition of this column.

NIKKI FRIED The Florida Commissioner

of Agriculture, and Florida's only statewide Democratic officeholder, has taken a lead in the fight against the novel coronavirus. She activated the 2-1-1 system, a text line and call center open 24/7 that families can contact to find free meals for children under 18 during the current COVID-19 school closures. As of March 17, there are approximately 1,000 approved Summer BreakSpot sites statewide. The number of locations will continue to increase as additional BreakSpot sites are approved. Commissioner Fried was also the first Florida Cabinet member to ask Governor DeSantis to implement a statewide "stay-athome" order.

INTERNATIONAL PAPER The Pensacola mill will continue to operate. The U.S. Department of Homeland Security considers forest products an "essential industry." International Paper products are critical components for the supply chains required to produce and deliver food, pharmaceuticals, hygiene products and emergency supplies around the world. Disruptions in the availability of IP products could create significant hardships to health care facilities, first responders, grocery stores and homes. LUMON MAY The county commissioner for District 3 has pulled together the leaders of Ascension Sacred Heart, Baptist Health Care and West Florida Hospital for a joint press conference to explain the impact of the COVID-19 virus on our community. He put in long hours to bring a drive-thru testing facility to the Brownsville Community Center and pushed for Florida Commissioner of Agriculture Nikki Fried to add Escambia County to her Summer BreakSpot program to feed children through the county. ASCENSION SACRED HEART The hospital demonstrated leadership by offering Escambia County its first drive-thru facility to test residents for the COVID-19 virus. Ascension Sacred Heart was also the first local healthcare system to forgo elective surgeries and procedures to extend its supply of personal protection equipment. The hospital took the additional step of partnering with 44

Community Health Clinics to create a second drive-thru facility in the Brownsville area.

ROBERT BENDER The county commis-

sioner for District 4 worked hard to find a compromise to keep the public beach areas on Pensacola Beach and Perdido Key open. He negotiated with hotels to limit their occupancy to 50%. However, when the county's healthcare leaders appeared before the commission asking for beach closure, Bender adjusted his position and offered a motion to close the areas for two weeks, which passed 5-0.

COSTELLO'S BUTCHER SHOP The

butcher shop and deli on West Fairfield Drive has created free lunch packages for children to pick up. The shop wrote on its Facebook page, "The children in need of a lunch have been coming in and picking up their lunches and have been very excited to do so. It has been a very rewarding and humbling experience."

WSRE Starting Monday, WSRE began airing a

new daytime schedule of "At-Home Learning" PBS programs suited for students from Pre-K through 12th grade from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. weekdays. The schedule change is part of a statewide effort among PBS stations in Florida to support families, educators and students during school closures brought on by the Coronavirus pandemic. The station created the website wsre.org/learning, and the response to its initial social media posts has been tremendous. The new daytime schedule replaces WSRE's usual lineup of PBS KIDS programming on the main channel, 23.1. The programming for early learners will remain available on the WSRE PBS KIDS channel, 23.4, and streaming online at pbskids.org.

COX To ensure digital equity for low-income students without internet at home, Cox is extending its Connect2Compete program for qualifying families from 30 days free to 60 days of free service. This offer applies to internet customers who enrolled in C2C starting on March 13, and is available to new customers through May 15. The service is regularly $9.95 a month and comes with a free WiFi modem, which can be drop shipped to a customer's home for self-installation. inweekly.net

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STAY AT HOME As I write this column on Tuesday afternoon, Florida and Georgia are the only two states with over 1,000 positive novel coronavirus COVID-19 cases that have not instituted stay-at-home orders. The governors of eight states with fewer cases have issued such orders. Governor Ron DeSantis has resisted what some believe is the ultimate executive order. On Monday, he issued an executive order directing the Florida Department of Health to require travelers from an area with a "substantial community spread, to include the New York TriState Area (Connecticut, New Jersey and New York) to self-isolate for 14 days after flying into Florida airports." However, his order didn't mention other states than have stay-at-home orders, such as Illinois. But the reality is this virus is everywhere now, so travel advisories aren't as effective as they were two weeks ago. When asked about signing a stay-athome order, DeSantis said he wasn't clear how such an order would work. "I think you are seeing, in some of the states that have done this, there has really been huge noncompliance," DeSantis said. "In New York City, it's like the party never ended. You have got people congregating all over the place. You see images from California, in Orange County. I don't think the beaches have ever been so crowded, with people going out." He added, "The fact of the matter is, a governor is not going to start imprisoning people just because they leave their house. So you are going to have a lot of noncompliance." However, stay-at-home isn't house arrest. Other countries have successfully implemented the measure and seen a positive impact on curbing the spread of this highly contagious virus and previous ones. The only effective measures that have worked around the world have been to distance people and widely test the population to track its movement. Unfortunately, we have had limited testing in Escambia County so far. People

look at the Florida Department of Health's COVID-19 dashboard, see Escambia County only has about a dozen cases and think we aren't in danger. They may not realize our hospitals waited nearly a week to receive those test results. Our county could have over 100 cases by this time next week as more samples are taken at our drive-thru and standalone testing facilities and more results come back. COVID-19 cases will continue to climb, and we don't know when the increases will stop—and social distancing is the only way to achieve what experts call "flattening the curve." The curve flattens when the virus' spread slows so that fewer people need to seek treatment. When that happens, we can talk about economic recovery, but the spread won't stop unless non-essential businesses temporarily close and workers stay home. So far, other states' stay-at-home orders allow people to get groceries, pick up take-out from their favorite restaurants, receive medical care, exercise outdoors, walk their pets and visit parks as long as they don't gather in crowds. Louisiana's order spells that out pretty clearly: "Take a walk, ride your bike, hike, jog and be in nature for exercise—just keep at least six feet between you and others." Yes, under these orders, individuals are encouraged to stay inside their residence as much as possible, but you aren't imprisoned, as DeSantis implied. The closures of bars, restaurants, retail and entertainment venues have hit our newspaper hard. We've lost advertisers, but we hope that lives have been saved. No one has fought harder for this community over the past two decades than this little newspaper, and that's what we believe we're doing now by encouraging DeSantis to step up and put Floridians' safety first. Inweekly believes Governor DeSantis must sign a stay-at-home executive order so that our recovery can begin sooner rather than later. {in} rick@inweekly.net

Other countries have successfully implemented the measure and seen a positive impact on curbing the spread of this highly contagious virus and previous ones.

March 26, 2020

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THE BEACH CLOSURE DEBATE

By Rick Outzen When he walked into the county commission's special meeting last Friday, Commissioner Lumon May thought he might be on the losing side of a vote when the board debated the temporary closure of Pensacola Beach to curb the spread novel coronavirus COVID-19. Though the hospitality industry had lobbied the commissioners individually for days, May stood firm and told Inweekly that if closing the public beaches saved one life and stopped the spread of the virus that he had to vote to do it. He said, "It's the right thing to do."

50% PLAN

The day before the meeting, Commissioner Robert Bender held a press conference at the Margaritaville Hotel on Pensacola Beach in hopes of keeping the county's main tourist attraction open. Hotel and condo executives talked about what they were doing to protect guests. Vic Bindi, the vice president of Lodging and Rental Management Sales with Premier Island Management Group, pointed out the economic impact of the hotels and condos on Pensacola Beach. "We have over 24,000 residents who are dependent upon their earnings on Pensacola Beach, so we're all keenly aware that we need to protect this piece of paradise and preserve it for everybody," he said. Bindi said properties were doing daily screenings with their staff. Bindi said, "We're 66

instructing them that if you feel sick, if you feel under the weather, we need you to leave, go home, take care of yourself, seek the proper medical treatment that you need." The beach properties voluntarily agreed to limit occupancy to 50%. He added, "Our spring break here is all about families, who are on some of the lowest density beaches here across the nation, and we want to do everything that we can to preserve and protect that." Innisfree Vice President Jason Nicholson said, "I'd like to start by applauding Commissioner Bender and the Board of County Commissioners of Escambia County for relying on data and science to drive their decisions because, ultimately, those decisions, as we very well know, impact humans both in a health position but also in a financial way." He said that his company has closed its self-serve buffets and moved to a plated option so the guests do not touch the serving utensils, the plates or food. "We've also moved our housekeeping departments to a process of only cleaning the rooms and sanitizing the rooms at check out," said Nicholson. "In addition, we'll work with our partners along the Gulf Coast to make sure there's adequate spacing on the beach and maintain our occupancy levels at our hotels at no more than 50%â€”50% keeps staff employed."

HOSPITALS PUSHED BACK

However, healthcare professionals countered. The heads of Ascension Sacred

Heart, Baptist Health Care and West Florida and Dr. John Lanza, the director of the local Florida Department of Health office, signed a letter requesting the commissioners close the beach. At the commissioner meeting, the hospital leaders had to defend their position, answering questions for more than an hour. The commissioners, particularly Doug Underhill and Bender, pressed for hard data on the spread of COVID-19 in the community. Unfortunately, few test results had been returned to the hospitals before the meeting. Ascension Sacred Heart opened the county's first drive-thru testing facility on Monday, March 16, but had not received any results by Friday morning. Ascension Sacred Heart President Dawn Rudolph said the hospital had begun testing in-house on Friday, making it the only hospital currently with that capability. The healthcare system received the testing kits but didn't have the reagents to run the tests. The special equipment to run the COVID-19 tests also had to be purchased and validated. The hospital now has the capability to run about 50 tests a day. The other hospitals were sending their samples to state or commercial labs. Rudolph told the commissioners that she expected about 10% of the tests to come back positive, which is the state average, but she admitted the actual percentage could be higher or lower. "I think when (test results) come back, they will be very informative of how well

we managed the social distancing and the other behaviors that we've been asking the public to do," said Rudolph. "These are tough decisions," she said. "I would say we are following this story very closely; we're trying to be as proactive as possible. We can look to other communities and did we do as well as they did in flattening the curve." Commissioner Underhill lamented the commissioners didn't have enough data to make a decision. He said, "While I recognize that you guys are trying to do a good job, if you want us to make decisions like that, you're going to have to come with much more actual verifiable facts that we can operate from." Rudolph agreed that percentages were important, but she added, "Boots on the ground are where we're at right now and seeing how we can get our associates to work safely. We're doing everything we can to be ready to serve. And data, as the Surgeon General is saying, show it takes only 15 days to flatten the curve." Underhill asked about the impact of our warm climate on the virus. "I haven't been able to find anything in terms of the lifecycle of the virus outside the human body in our environments, the environments that we're talking about closing down," he said. "I haven't seen anything that actually talks about how that virus behaves outside the human body in the environments that you're asking us to create these rates on." Rudolph said the recommendation to close the beaches was about following the CDC guideline that it would take 15 days of social distancing to flatten the curve of the spread. "Many people have had sleepless nights working on our understanding, our current capabilities and how we can expand and be innovative," said Rudolph. "Just be confident in our abilities; appreciate the ability to make recommendations. At the end of the day, those decisions are ultimately, unfortunately or fortunately, on your shoulders." Baptist CEO Mark Faulkner said, "We don't have the facts, we don't. You're right. We only have hundreds, perhaps even thousands getting tests out there today." He continued, "We've walked into a dark room with a small flashlight and had only one positive result. When we turn on the lights, we're going to see we have a whole lot more than that." Faulkner said the pandemic has already been a "crater for our economy." "We're not trying to avoid any crater or miss the crater," he said. "How deep and how long all depends on the duration of this event. Is it going to be weeks or months? I think the answer is how we deal with the situation today. We got an inweekly.net

economic crisis, but we're trying to avoid a humanitarian crisis at this point." Commissioner Bender pushed back, "You understand we are following CDC guidelines as well? Currently, the CDC guidelines for the beach, the governor said, was social distancing. We are following that right now, too." He spoke to the audience, "I just want everybody out there to know that the same guidelines you are following for your collective procedures or anything else for the hospital, we are following those same guidelines as it pertains to our beaches as requested by the CDC." When it was brought up that other Florida counties and the governor of Alabama had closed their beaches, Bender responded, "To say that the beaches are closed isn't entirely inaccurate. That's why we've been doing our due diligence in actually seeing what those ordinances say. Clearwater was one of the first ones to close, but they only closed the public areas. They know they can't close the beaches behind the condos and the hotels." He added, "Pensacola Beach is our largest park. I was out there yesterday, and there's a stretch of 150 yards of beach with nobody on it. The other ones, they were practicing the distancing like we're asking. "Mark, would you agree that the 50% reduction in our transient housing would address that issue?" said Underhill. "Essentially, what that basically means for the whole summer is if you don't have a reservation, you have nowhere to stay here.

March 26, 2020

Would you not acknowledge that is, in fact, a pretty substantial decrease in those transients that would be using our beaches? "Sure, it's a reduction," answered Faulkner. Underhill said, "And you said reductions were good, obviously. Faulkner replied, "Elimination is better." Underhill later brought back his point about the local environment. He said, "We should have the data to be able to support whether or not community spread or to what extent of community spread is a problem in our environment. If you have any of that kind of data, I'd like to see it." "We don't have solid data right now about the effect of warm, moist air on this virus. If it acts like other similar viruses, which thrive in cold, dry, then yes, we could hope to see some bending of these transmissions in our summer months," said Faulkner. "But this is a new virus, so we don't know how it's going to behave."

TURNING POINT

While the Escambia County commissioners were hearing for the hospital executives, Santa Rosa County announced it was closing Navarre Beach. "This decision was reached based on discussions with leaders in the healthcare industry, our observations of density on the beach yesterday, and an anticipated increase in the number of beachgoers as neighboring beaches close," said Commission Chairman Don Salter. "This measure will decrease travel incentives and help prevent the spread of COVID-19. Once

we are assured by our medical professionals it is safe, our beautiful beaches will be reopened for all to enjoy." Gov. DeSantis issued Executive Order 20-71 that closed on-premises consumption of food and alcohol at Florida bars and restaurants and shut down gyms and fitness centers.

"Hopefully, the projections that we are all hearing are wrong. And this is a huge economic impact, but lives do matter more. We can come back from economic impacts." Robert Bender Another turning point for the discussion was when Pensacola Beach lifeguard Grant Bridges addressed the commissioners. He said, "I love the job so much that I convinced my other two sisters to work there with me. That's how much I loved it." However, he implored the board to close the beach. "It's sunny; if there's surf where there's rip currents, we can make a tremendous amount of rescues," Bridges said. "And let me be clear, that means we're going to have lifeguards dressed in bathing suits saving people that inhale water and are now coughing as a result—people that could potentially be infected." He continued, "That terrifies me; that terrifies my sisters who live with my

parents. My dad was a 30-year military veteran. And now he's more in danger now. Because if there is surf this weekend, my sisters make rescues, they come home, they could infect my parents." By the time the commissioners came to vote on closing the public beaches, their attitude had shifted. Commissioner Bender, whose district includes Pensacola Beach, took the lead. While recognizing the openness of the beach and its value to the well-being—economically, physically and mentally—of Escambia County, he realized a temporary closure was necessary to flatten the spread of the virus. "Our definition of a beach is vastly different than maybe some of our neighboring counties," he said. "But we have to go back to what's the best for our community." He added, "Hopefully, the projections that we are all hearing are wrong. And this is a huge economic impact, but lives do matter more. We can come back from economic impacts. And so, when we do get some directional requests from our healthcare professionals, it becomes difficult for me to look them in the face and me to tell them I can't do that." By a unanimous vote, the Board of County Commissioners voted to temporarily close public beaches, effective midnight March 20 until the next Board of County Commission meeting on April 2. This action would be reevaluated at that time. No one was more stunned than Commissioner May. He told Inweekly, "I'm glad we stood together on this tough decision." {in}

Grover Robinson / Photo courtesy of City of Pensacola

FIGHTING FEAR Opening his weekly presser Monday morning, Pensacola Mayor Grover Robinson focused on a key element of the current COVID-19 coronavirus ordeal: fear. "I certainly think that now is a time that echoes what FDR said, when he said that 'we have nothing to fear but fear itself,'" Mayor Robinson said. "There certainly is a lot of fear out there, it's almost palpable, you can feel it. Whether it's the economy or whether it's the virus." Robinson asked that people not be afraid and made assurances that the community would rebound following the virus and the measures being taken to slow its spread. As a gesture "to exemplify that I don't fear where we are and I expect us to make a full recovery,"Â the mayor said that

he was forgoing his salary of $100,000 to help citizens currently not receiving paychecks better pay their bills with Pensacola Energy and the city's sanitation services. "Grant it, this isn't going to make a tremendous drop in the bucket, but what I want to communicate to you is that I'm not afraid," Robinson said. The Monday, March 23 press conference was held at the Brownsville Community Center, where Community Health of Northwest Florida and Ascension Sacred Heart had created a COVID-19 testing site had been set up. "I've got some healthcare warriors out there," said Chandra Smiley, CEO of Community Health of Northwest Florida, pointing outside toward the testing site, "that have suited up to be here for this

community and for us, to be there getting us through this." Mayor Robinson said that area hospitals are not currently being strained. "We have not seen any of the hospitals overrun at this particular time," he said. "That's not to say that's not going to happen, I'm simply saying it's not happening at this particular time." While other locales, where healthcare supplies like tests and masks have become limited, officials have recommended only those requiring medical attention and healthcare workers receive a COVID-19 test. Mayor Robinson said that Escambia County did not appear to have any need to limit testing due to a lack of supplies. "From our standpoint, we need to continue to do the testing to figure out what do we have and what are we fighting. If we get to a point where we do have community spread, we might very well take those actions," Robinson said. "You're going to see us continue to change as we hit certain thresholds, but at this point we're not there." County Commissioner Lumon May joined the mayor to point out the Brownsville Community Center would also serve as one of Escambia's student meal sites, where local students can receive food daily. He said that the testing and the meal site will be located in two separate areas. "The food distribution will be in the back parking lot," May said. "So, those populations will not cross paths." Escambia County is partnering with the Escambia County School District to provide meals to students while school is out of session. The district has five sites, and the county is jumping that number to 18. "So, every neighborhood in Escambia County will have access to nutritional meals for children," May said. "At most of our libraries, community centers and a majority of our schools we'll be feeding."

DAMAGE ASSESSMENT SURVEY

Governor Ron DeSantis activated the Busi-

ness Damage Assessment survey to assess the impact of COVID-19 on Florida's local business operations. The survey, managed by the DEO, evaluates businesses affected by COVID-19 and the impacts the virus has had on the local economy. The Business Damage Assessment Survey can be taken online at floridadisaster.biz. Inweekly spoke with FloridaWest CEO Scott Luth about the importance of the survey for our local economy. "The survey helps the state get a handle on the number of businesses that are having an impact," Luth said. "Obviously, that's changing daily, but we're trying to gather that information to allow the different state agencies to make better decisions on how to support companies. And it's also used to request additional assistance from the federal government for the state and our region." He continued, "For that reason, we're encouraging companies to get online, register. When they register, then they also are put on the mailing list to get direct emails from DEO and others about some of the different programs that will probably come out over the coming weeks." Without the surveys, our county might get overlooked when the state plans its recovery strategy, according to Luth. "If the state doesn't have surveys from our area, they may just assume everything's great and fine," he told Inweekly. "That's why they're encouraging communities and businesses to push this out, so they have a better feel for who's being impacted the most and to what level they're being impacted."

BRIDGE LOANS Gov. Ron DeSantis last

week also announced that Florida would begin a $50 million bridge-loan program for businesses hurt by the novel coronavirus and that he has directed the state's revenue department to extend deadlines for businesses to pay corporate income taxes. Appearing at the state Emergency Operations Center in Tallahassee, DeSantis said the $50 million in state loans would supplement any loans made available by

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the U.S. Small Business Administration and will help to "keep people afloat." People can apply for the loans, administered by the Florida Department of Economic Opportunity, beginning today. The interestfree loans can be up to $50,000. Apply at floridadisasterloan.org. "We think that this is obviously something that is affecting the economy. We hope this is not something that affects the economy infinitum, that it's relatively short," Governor DeSantis said in his announcement. "The problem is if you're in some of these industries really getting hit, you have a cash flow issue. Particularly if you have tight margins, this is a way to kind of keep people afloat." Luth told Inweekly, "The application period runs through May 8. The loans are intended to bridge you to maybe help with payroll, to help with expenses, until you either make your loss of business insurance claim or apply for the next loan program-a larger loan program through the USBDC program that is your injury disaster commercial loan, which is a much longer loan like we're used to with the hurricanes."

CLAIM CENTER On March 16, Pensacola Mayor Grover Robinson sent a letter to

Governor Ron DeSantis proposing that a claim center be established for laid-off workers and small businesses that would be similar to the BP claim centers after the 2010 BP oil spill. "While I am the most avid supporter of our free-market economy, I am proposing that the State of Florida work with the United States government to establish some type of poll for supporting wages for small businesses," wrote the mayor. He explained, "My belief is that if some pool were established by the federal government provided to states, they could administer it to individual companies who did not reduce payroll and could be reimbursed for those payroll expenses during the time periods where COVID-19 emergencies have been declared and businesses have been asked to significantly curtail their activities to contain the spread of the disease." The governor hasn't replied.

COX HELPS CONNECT As COVID-19 continues to force schools to shift to online learning, Cox announced on Monday more temporary changes to its low-cost service, Connect2Compete. To ensure digital equity for low-income students without internet at home, Cox

extended its Connect2Compete program for qualifying families from 30 days free to 60 days of free service. The offer applies to internet customers who enrolled in C2C starting on March 13 and is available to new customers through May 15. The service is regularly $9.95 a month and comes with a free WiFi modem, which can be drop-shipped to a customer's home for self-installation. Additional changes include: •A speed increase to 50 Mbps to support families with multiple online devices at once for the next 60 days. •First 60 days complimentary premium remote helpdesk support to provide peace of mind and ease for technology needs •In-home WiFi equipment and self-installation with no additional fees •In association with PCs for People, families can purchase discounted refurbished computers. •Set up a process to fast track applications for schools who provide a list of eligible students.

UNITED WAY RELIEF FUND In response to the coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic, United Way of West Florida has launched its relief fund to support those affected in Escambia and Santa Rosa counties. United Way of West Florida's COV-

ID-19 Response Fund will support families within our service area that have been economically impacted by the pandemic and will provide support to nonprofit agencies that are providing critical services to those in need. To donate to this fund, text 850Respond to 41444 or visit uwwf.org/covid19fund. Gifts of all sizes will improve our community's ability to respond during this unprecedented time. Individuals in need of immediate assistance accessing food, paying housing or utility bills, or other essential services are urged to dial 211 from their phones or visit 211nwfl.org. 211 Northwest Florida provides information and referral services to the following counties—Escambia, Bay, Calhoun, Gulf, Holmes, Jackson, Santa Rosa and Washington. 211 Northwest Florida also provides support services for veterans in need of assistance through the Florida Veteran's Support Line. By dialing 1-844-MYFLVET (6935838), or 211 and disclosing that the caller is a veteran, they may speak directly with a fellow veteran trained to provide emotional support and links to community resources. For more information and updates regarding COVID-19, please visit uwwf.org/ covid19. {in}

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WEEK OF MARCH 26-APRIL 1

Arts & Entertainment art, film, music, stage, books and other signs of civilization...

The Market Matters By Jeremy Morrison

In addition to presenting the world with a healthcare crisis, COVID-19 and corresponding measures to curb its spread have turned nearly every facet of life inside out and upside down. Examples of the virus's disruption can found everywhere—from the shuttered bars and stores to the empty sidewalks and streets, as if a vacuum has siphoned away everyday life only to leave a spooky void in its place. One such ghostly space can be found now on Saturdays along Palafox Place, where a thriving market of artists, farmers and other entrepreneurs typically gather to share their wares with Pensacola. Palafox Market, produced by the Downtown Improvement Board (DIB), has been canceled through at least the beginning of May in an attempt to encourage social distancing and fight the spread of COVID-19. Such a closure has both economic and community ramifications. For the vendors who depend on the market to sell their goods, the closing is potentially devastating to business. And for the shoppers who enjoy the sense of community the weekly gathering provides, the closure is depriving Pensacola of a social hub.

ONLINE SALES PLANS

Even though there will be no Palafox Market for a while, many of the vendors can still connect with customers online. One of those vendors is Kris Marschand of Mockingbird Art Glass and Design. "Palafox was my show of choice," he said, explaining that he's now trying to sell his glasswork online, through Facebook Marketplace or

GRAPHIC NOVELS

eBay. "I'm still making glass art and hoping for the best." Likewise, Sabina Zunguze, who operates A Gift To Africa, is also reassessing her game plan. "I understand that it is a crazy time and the closure is for the safety of everyone," Zunguze said, laying out her plan to boost internet sales. "I'm also willing to deliver wherever it is possible, and people can just get in touch with me via the website." Andrew and Mila Busch, who operate the skincare company Ladyloved, are also attempting to shuffle sales online to offset the missed Saturdays at the market. The couple reached customers through both the Palafox Market and another weekly market in Rosemary Beach, which has also closed due to concerns over the coronavirus. "These markets constitute the majority of our revenue stream," Andrew said. Ladyloved is an in-house operation, meaning that the company's products are manufactured in its own lab, meaning there is significant overhead to the operation. "We're currently bleeding capital by the day, as I know many others are," Andrew said. During this closure period, Ladyloved will focus more energy on filling orders online and also use the time to work on future product releases. The company is also offering discounts to encourage customers during this period. Another Palafox Market vendor focusing on creating more product during this time is Awesometropolis, which creates handmade products designed to inspire creative play for children. Owner Barbara Fletcher said that the loss of the market will result in a loss of connectivity with customers.

"Palafox Market has been the only location that we have participated in and have strived to make a name for ourselves with our regular and repeat customers," Fletcher said. Fletcher said that following the market's closure, two area businesses stepped in to help. First, South Market Restaurant-Pensacola agreed to facilitate a space for vendors. But it's a restaurant, so it soon closed too. Next, The Farm, formerly Flora Bama Farms, has offered to host market vendors on the weekends. While some vendors, such as artisans, can focus more on online sales, or even put their inventory in temporary storage until the market reopens, others will have a more difficult time taking such measures. Farmers, for instance, are working with perishable goods.

SAFE OFFLINE OPTIONS

Meredith Elliott, co-founder of Maeday Farm, sells fresh fruit and vegetables at the Palafox Market. And while the market is but one venue where Maeday reaches customers, the other revenue stream—direct sales to now closed and limited-service restaurants—has also disappeared. "So we've been scrambling to find other avenues," Elliott said, explaining that temporary, smaller-scale pop-up markets might be one solution. "It's a challenge for sure, but we're very blessed to have an awesome group of regular customers, and we'll continue trying to get our produce into their hands as best as we can." Stephanie Jones, proprietor of Mrs. Jones Cold Brew, points to the Palafox Market as key in her company's growth. She said that her product, cold brew coffee concentrate, is best served with a bit of instruction and that

it's difficult to imagine launching the company without such a "unique platform" to communicate with new customers. "At the market, we made coffee beverages for customers, providing an instant demonstration of the process that they can then replicate at home after buying the bottled concentrate," Jones said. "We loved the immediate feedback this gave us. Seeing the light bulb go on for people when they realize that they can have locally-roasted, brewed and bottled coffee in a convenient concentrate—it was priceless." While Jones normally still offers her cold brew concentrate at the Palafox Market, she has also grown the business into other venues, so getting her product during this hiatus is still possible. She recently opened a café space along with fellow Palafox Market alumni Big Jerk Soda and Nomadic Eats. Mrs. Jones Cold Brew is also already stocked at local grocery stores Apple Market and Ever'man. "We believe that we were uniquely positioned to adapt in this environment," Jones said. "A lot of folks are still buying, definitely showing us that coffee is an essential part of daily life while quarantined." While the DIB and vendors are working to facilitate ways connect with customers, over the next few weeks, there's no denying a lot is lost in this temporary closure. "Palafox Market is not only a place to make unique purchases," explained Fletcher, of Awesometropolis, "[It's] a place where the community has come together regardless of what is going on and always has a smile, a laugh, a kind word or even a sympathetic hug." {in}

KIDS BOOKS Adoption • Paternity • Dependency/DCF Hearings Prenuptial Agreements • Postnuptial Agreements Divorce • Child Custody and Timesharing Child Support • Child Support Modifications Alimony • Collaborative Divorce • Divorce Mediation • Pre-Suit Family Law Mediation

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127 Palafox Place Suite 100 (850)466-3115 autumnbeckblackledge.com 11

•Ballard Farm, facebook.com/ballard1234 •P&K Nursery, facebook.com/p-and-k-nursery-134902610014512 •East Hill Honey Co., easthillhoney.com •Kittrell's Daydream Apiary, kittrellsdaydream.com

Food/Beverage Vendors:

•Mrs. Jones Cold Brew, mrsjonescoldbrew.com •DeLuna Coffee, delunacoffee.com •L.A. Gourmet, loweralabamagourmet.com •The Hummus Lady, thehummuslady.com •Aunt Mandy's Sweets, facebook.com/auntmandysweets •A Gift to Africa, agift2africa.com •Pretty Bear's Bakery, theprettybearsbakery.com •30A Barks, 30abarks.com •My Happy Dog 123, myhappydog123.com •Insanely Savage Pecans, insanelysavagepecans.com •C&D Mill, facebook.com/canddmills •Frank's Daily Bread Catering, franksdailybreadcatering.com •Fruitbless, facebook.com/fruitbless •Macaron Chef, themacaronchef.com

Photo courtesy of Mrs. Jones Cold Brew

DIB'S PALAFOX MARKET ONLINE SHOPPING DIRECTORY Farm/Nursery Vendors:

•Charlotte Mason Print Co., charlottemasonprintco.com/shop •Bizentine Press, bizentinepress.com/store •Lyvon's Pottery, Ever'man (both locations) •Awesometropolis, theawesometropolis.com •Flaura by Laura, facebook.com/flauraofpensacola •Andyworks, facebook.com/andyworks2 •Jeslyn Cantrell Art, jeslynkate.com/shop-1 •Judy Bardsley Art, etsy.com/shop/heirloomboxen •Slaybelles Design, facebook.com/slaybelles-design-193170541251191 •Noora's Naturals, noorasnaturals.etsy.com •Jaime Shevat Art, jaimeshevat.com This directory will continue to be updated during the market closure. Visit downtownpensacola.com/blog for more information.

Health/Cosmetics Vendors:

•Nature Nine Farms, natureninefarms.com •Forest Farm, facebook.com/forest-farm-565740813559787 •Stewart Farm, facebook.com/carlstewartfarms •Forland Family Farm, facebook.com/farmerforland •Hidden Pastures Farm, facebook.com/hiddenpasturesfarmllc •Maeday Farm, maedayfarm.com •Sunset Ranch, sunsetranchofescambiafarms.com •Crescere Farms, facebook.com/crescerefarms •Big Creek Farm, bigcreekfarm-florida.com

•Ladyloved, ladyloved.com •Harmony Creek Farms, harmonycreekfarm.com •Beach Bird Botanicals, beachbirdbotanicals.com •LunaStella Naturals, lunastellanaturals.com •Thrive Health, floridaelderberry.com

Art/Miscellaneous Vendors:

•Changing Tides Jewelry, changingtidesjewelry.com •Bradley Deal Fine Art, bradleydeal.com •Rebecca McCall Photography, rebeccamccallphotography.com •Delia Stone Jewelry, etsy.com/shop/deliasstones •Mockingbird Art Glass and Design, krisannesglass.weebly.com

Photo courtesy of Charlotte Mason Print Co.

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The Lee House is here if you need us.

In the meantime, follow us on social media – where we’re sharing some of our signature baking recipes for you to try at home, as well as favorite pineapple pics, and heartwarming stories.

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Spring Into Fresh Ideas April Classes & Events HIBACHI STEAK & SHRIMP DEMO APR. 1 – 6 PM $40 CAST IRON PIZZA APR. 6 – 6 PM $45 AHI TUNA: SEARED LOIN, POKE & STEAK CUT DEMO APR. 8 – 6 PM $65 LUNCH & LEARN: AVOCADO: PANKO FRIED, EGG BAKED, & SHRIMP SALAD APR. 10 – NOON

$25

CAST IRON RIBEYE & CRAB CAKE APR. 13 – 6 PM $65 BEEF WELLINGTON DEMO APR. 15 – 6 PM

$65

HANDMADE PASTA APR. 20 – 6 PM $60 SEARED SCALLOPS & HERB BUTTER APR. 22 – 6 PM $65 LUNCH & LEARN: TRADITIONAL QUICHE & SALAD W/ FRENCH STYLE VINAIGRETTE APR. 24 – NOON

$25

HANDMADE SUSHI APR. 29 – 6 PM

$65

Class sizes are limited,

and are demonstration only. We are committed to the health and safety of everyone.

GE T YOU R BODACIOUS TO - G O ~ CU R B SI DE PICK-U P AVA I L A BLE TAX AND FEE NOT INCLUDED. RESERVATIONS REQUESTED 24 HOURS IN ADVANCE AND ADULT COOKING CLASSES RESERVATIONS INCLUDE A COMPLIMENTARY GLASS OF WINE OR BEER. REFUNDS AVAILABLE ONLY WITH 48 HOUR NOTICE. CLASSES THAT DO NOT MEET A MINIMUM OF 10 WILL BE RESCHEDULED AND REGISTRATION FEES REFUNDED IMMEDIATELY.

March 26, 2020

BOD0549 April 2020 Class IN.indd 1

3/19/20 3:08 PM

COMMUNITY BOARD •Tryon Beach Library, 1200 Langley Ave. •Genealogy Branch Library, 5740 N. Ninth Ave. •Southwest Branch Library, 12248 Gulf Beach Highway •Westside Branch Library, 1301 W. Gregory St. •Century Branch Library, 7991 N. Century Blvd. The meals will include lunch and a snack, and meals will be available on a firstcome, first-served basis. Additionally, with the demand for help increasing, Feeding the Gulf Coast is looking for volunteers. Those looking to donate their time or money can find more information on the website. And if you or someone you know needs assistance, click "Find Help" at feedingthegulfcoast.org. You can also call (888) 704-FOOD or text FOOD to 877-877.

≥ COMMISSIONER NIKKI FRIED ACTIVATES 2-1-1 LINE FOR FREE CHILDREN'S MEALS

For however long we think it's of value to the community and our readers, we're going to use the editorial space typically reserved for our calendar events for a community information source. Our plan is to make this space work in two ways—provide information for those in need of assistance and also ways to help for those who are able to do so during this crisis. If you have something you'd like included in a future community board, please send the details to info@inweekly.net.

≥FEEDING THE GULF COAST

Feeding the Gulf Coast is partnering with local organizations to offer free meals

to children, 18 and under, who are no longer receiving free or reduced lunch due to school closures. There are dozens of sites in the Pensacola area. To find a distribution site close to you, visit feedingthegulfcoast.org/ find-help/find-a-pantry. Some of the distribution sites include county public libraries. Escambia County's West Florida Public Libraries are partnering with Feeding the Gulf Coast to provide free curbside pickup meals for youth aged 18 and under (youth must be present to receive meals; food will not be given to adults) at all library branch locations, Monday-Friday from 11 a.m.-1 p.m. •Molino Branch Library, 6450-A Highway 95A •Pensacola Library, 239 N. Spring St.

Florida Agriculture Commissioner Nikki Fried and the Florida Department of Agriculture and Consumer Services have partnered with 2-1-1 to activate a text line and call center open 24/7, which families can contact to find free meals for children under 18 during the current COVID-19 school closures. This follows the department's recent activation of the Summer BreakSpot children's meal locator website at summerbreakspot.freshfromflorida.com. Floridians can now text FLKIDSMEALS to 211-211 to find their closest participating Summer BreakSpot location and can also call 2-1-1 to speak with a live operator 24 hours a day for additional locations.

≥FREE KIDS MEALS AT RESTAURANTS In addition to nonprofits and the state, some local and chain restaurants are also offering promotions to help feed kids. COSTELLO'S BUTCHER SHOP 8190 W. Fairfield Drive, facebook.com/ costellosbutcheranddeli Free lunches and fresh fruit for available for school-aged kids in need of lunch. CACTUS FLOWER CAFÉ facebook.com/californiafreshmex

Free delivery and free kids meals with the purchase of adult entrees. MOE'S SOUTHWEST GRILL 5100 N. Ninth Ave. 7175 N. Davis Highway Through March 28, enjoy a free kid's entrée with any adult entrée purchase at Moe's. Order takeout, online or on the app and get free delivery on orders of $10 or more. BURGER KING Make your purchase through the Burger King app and get two free kids meals.

≥ ODD COLONY BREWING CO. HOSTS FOOD DRIVE

260 N. Palafox St., facebook.com/oddcolony Odd Colony will be accepting drop-off food donations Thursday, March 26, and Friday, March 27, from noon-5 p.m. to help the kids at Montclair Elementary who typically receive school lunches.

≥BLOOD DONATIONS IN NEED

DURING CORONAVIRUS CRISIS

With businesses, schools and universities shut down amid the coronavirus pandemic, it is drastically impacting where OneBlood can host blood drives. According to a press release, OneBlood has had more than 1,900 blood drive cancellations, and that number is expected to rise. To prevent a critical blood supply issue from occurring, individuals can make donations at OneBlood donor centers or Big Red Bus blood drives. Appointments are encouraged and can be made at oneblood.org. The U.S. Surgeon General and the FDA have stated that it remains safe to donate blood and that it is safe to attend blood drives. During this pandemic, OneBlood assures that donating is safe. All OneBlood phlebotomists wear medical gloves that are changed for each donation, all donortouched areas and equipment are disinfected after every donation, which includes donor beds, registration tablets, bloodpressure cuffs and hemoglobin sensors. OneBlood has also implemented additional social distancing safety protocols such as asking donors to wait in their car before entering the bus or donation center to limit the number of people in one place.

STAY LOCAL, PENSACOLA Now more than ever, local businesses need our support. So if you have the means, please consider supporting the local eateries offering curbside + delivery services, ordering from online local retailers and shopping at locally-owned “essential” businesses when possible.

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Stock Market Losses? ≥PENSACOLA HUMANE SOCIETY

NEEDS DONATIONS FOR PET PANTRY

The Pensacola Humane Society is in need of donations for its Pet Pantry, which provides dog and cat food for pet owners in need of assistance. Donations of any brand of wet or dry cat, kitten, dog and puppy food, litter and treats can be left on the front porch of 5 N. Q St., or the staff of PHS will be happy to meet you at your car and unload your donations for you. Donations can be delivered Tuesday through Saturday noon-5 p.m. and Sunday 1-4 p.m. The PHS Pet Pantry provides the food at no cost to pet owners who come to the shelter and present an acceptable form of identification, such as a driver's license.

≥SANTA ROSA COUNTY ANIMAL SHELTER IN NEED OF FOSTER HOMES

The shelter is currently desperate for foster homes as owner surrenders have increased due to the coronavirus pandemic. SRCAS is also asking people who find friendly stray pets to consider fostering until the shelter can resume normal operations. Stray finders can take the pet to a vet clinic or SRCAS, 4451 Pine Forest Road in Milton, to check for a microchip, file a found report, create and hang flyers in the vicinity of where the pet was found and hold the pet to give the owner time to locate it. For more information about fostering or to make a donation, contact Santa Rosa County Animal Services at 983-4680 or santarosa. fl.gov/387/animal-services.

≥SAVE PENSACOLA BEER

50 E. Garden St., perfectplain.com Perfect Plain Brewing Co. has designed a new T-shirt to help the local craft beer community. Shirts are on $29 and proceeds will go directly to employees in need throughout the city. The shirts are available for pre-sale online now and will eventually be available during PPBC curbside pickup hours. In trade of your support, you will get a free beer card from PPBC, and if you wear the shirt in the brewery when they reopen, they will give you 10% off of your bill for the rest of 2020.

≥OPENING DOORS OF NORTHWEST FLORIDA CLOSES OFFICES, NEEDS DONATIONS FOR HOMELESS CAMPS

Opening Doors of Northwest Florida offices will be temporarily closed during the coronavirus pandemic. Client walk-in and client appointment assistance is also suspended until further notice. You can still reach staff at 439-3009 Monday-Friday from 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m. The nonprofit's Outreach Team will be dropping off office supplies on-hand to area homeless camps and are in need of supplies to deliver. If you can help, please text I-Care to 427-5780. For more information, visit facebook.com/openingdoorsnwfl.org

≥PENSACOLA CHAMBER ANNOUNCES SAVE FLORIDA BUSINESS INITIATIVE The Greater Pensacola Chamber of March 26, 2020

Commerce, Florida Restaurant & Lodging Association (FRLA) and DigiPro Media have partnered together to announce the Save Florida Business Initiative to help businesses affected by the pandemic. The Save Florida Business Initiative will connect consumers in Escambia and Santa Rosa counties to area businesses through the savefloridabusiness.com website where consumers can be connected to businesses participating in the program. To participate, any Escambia or Santa Rosa county business must offer a $75 Gift Card Bond that has a retail value of $100. The purchase of the Gift Card Bond incentivizes consumers since they earn $25 for every $75 Gift Card Bond purchased. Local businesses can register to participate, and consumers can search and connect with registered businesses at savefloridabusiness.com. There is no limit to the number of Gift Card bonds an individual can purchase.

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≥TIMBER CREEK DISTILLERY OFFERING FREE HAND SANITIZER

Crestview-based Timber Creek Distillery is offering free homemade hand sanitizer to those having trouble finding some in the stores. The sanitizer is made with the guidelines set from the World Health Organization. The hand sanitizers come in 10 different types using various spirits. For more information, visit facebook.com/timbercreekdistillery.

≥SENIOR DINING SITES

Council on Aging of West Florida is continuing their service of providing meals to seniors in need. All participants at senior dining sites in both Escambia and Santa Rosa counties will receive their meals pre-plated and ready to take home. Within the City of Pensacola, Bayview, Cobb, Fricker and Gull Point centers will close; however, participants at all sites are welcome to receive to-go pre-plated meals at Bayview and Cobb. Seniors must call Council on Aging at 432-1475 by noon the day before to reserve a plate.

POPPY GARCIA: BLESS YOUR HEART VIRTUAL TOURS AVAILABLE AT PENSACOLAMUSEUM.ORG PENSACOLA MUSEUM OF ART

All other senior dining sites: Pensacola/Escambia County •Cantonment Senior Center, 132 Mintz Lane •Century Senior Center, 6025 Industrial Blvd. •Beulah Senior Center, 7425 Woodside Road •Westminster Retirement Village, Bldg. #1, 1700 N. L St. •Westwood Homes, 4400 Westover Ave. Santa Rosa County •City of Milton Community Center, 6860 Pooley St., Bagdad •Chumuckla Community Center, 2355 Highway 182 •First United Methodist Church of Pace, 4540 Chumuckla Highway •E.H. Pullum Senior Center, 8476 Gordon Goodin Lane •Jay Community Center, 5259 Booker Lane 15

a&e

Libraries May Be Our Saving Grace in Quarantine

Once again, libraries are coming to the rescue, even with their doors closed to the general public. From eBooks to distance learning, public libraries are providing some of the tools and entertainment you'll need as you work, learn and try to exist at home. Here's what you need to know.

ONLINE SERVICES

Most library cards include access to an online portal with tons of eBooks, audiobooks

and learning resources. It's perfect for social distancing because you don't have to go to the library to reserve materials, and it's free with your library card. You can also reserve real books online and pick up at some drive-thru locations. •For Escambia County Residents Access eBooks, magazines and audio books to satisfy your reading needs. You can also take this quarantine time to learn a new language through Transparent Language online or learn a new skill with Universal Class, which offers courses in more than 30 different subjects. If you have kids at home, there's digital content for kids, including ABCMouse Early Learning Academy for children ages 2 to 8 and online books. Visit mywfpl.com/borrow/ ebooks for more information. •For Santa Rosa County Residents You can access "e-Sources" including eBooks, eAudiobooks and educational resources online. Borrow books through the Axis360 or RB Digital apps using your library card number and pin. You can also find children's books and audiobooks through TumbleBook. Educational resources such as college admissions test prep, Transparent Language

and genealogy resources are included with your free library card. Visit santarosa. fl.gov/libraries for more information.

REMOTE LEARNING

With schools out, Escambia County community centers and libraries are available for remote learning for Escambia County School District students who do not have adequate access at home. According to a release from the county, starting April 1, locations will ensure there is enough space for students while maintaining social distancing guidelines. Additionally, staff will be frequently cleaning surfaces and limiting gatherings to 10 or fewer people per the CDC recommendations. "Although our instructional plan provides for the use of books and paper packets, the most robust instruction will occur through virtual sources," said Escambia County School District Superintendent Malcolm Thomas. "The connectivity provided throughout the county will allow these students access to their lessons over the internet, enhancing their opportunity for greater academic success."

COOL RESOURCES FOR NON-CARDHOLDERS

If you don't have a library card, now is definitely a good time to get one. However, there are some other great online resources for book lovers, too. •SimplyE from New York Public Library The SimplyE app has over 300,000 eBooks, from bestsellers to classics, to choose from so you never have to worry about running out of titles. Run, don't walk, to download the app on iTunes and the Google Play Store. Best part? It's free and open to everyone, not just New Yorkers. •Open Library Among other great eBook services, Open Library works on the mission of making all published works available to everyone. Sign up online at openlibrary.org. •Free Stories from Audible As long as schools are closed, Audible has committed to providing access to stream a large collection of stories that engage a wide range of ages, including classics older readers can enjoy such as "Jane Eyre" and "Romeo and Juliet." Start streaming at stories.audible. com/start-listen. {in}

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March 26, 2020

free will astrology WEEK OF MARCH 26 ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): Your oracle

comes from Aries poet Octavio Paz—"The path the ancestors cleared is overgrown, unused. The other path, smooth and broad, is crowded with travelers. It goes nowhere. There's a third path—mine. Before me, no one. Behind me, no one. Alone, I find my way." APRIL FOOL! Although the passage by Octavio Paz is mostly accurate for your destiny during the rest of 2020, it's off-kilter in one way—It's too ponderously serious and melodramatic. You should find a way to carry out its advice with meditative grace and effervescent calm.

By Rob Brezsny

theologian John Wesley (1703–1791) was a Christian who embodied the liberal values that Christ actually taught. He advocated for the abolition of slavery, prison reform, the ordination of women priests and a vegetarian diet. He gave away a lot of his money and administered many charities. To accomplish his life's work, he traveled 250,000 miles on horseback and preached 40,000 sermons. Let's make him your role model for the coming weeks. Be inspired by his life as you vividly express your care and compassion. APRIL FOOL! I lied a little bit. Although most of what I just recommended is a good idea, the part about traveling long distances, either on horseback or by other means, is not.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): A century ago, fiery writer Maxim Gorky and hardass Taurus politician Vladimir Lenin were listening to a Beethoven sonata together. "I can't listen to music too often," Lenin told his companion. "It affects your nerves, makes you want to say stupid, nice things." This is crucial advice for you to heed in the coming weeks, Taurus. You need to be as smart and tough as possible, so don't you dare listen to music. APRIL FOOL! Lenin was half-mistaken, and I half-lied. The fact is, music makes you smarter and nicer, and those will be key assets for you to cultivate in the coming weeks. So yes, do listen to a lot of music.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22): The neurotic but talented French novelist Marcel Proust observed, "Everything vital in the world comes from neurotics. They alone have founded religions and composed our masterpieces." With that in mind, and in accordance with current astrological omens, I urge you to cultivate your own neurotic qualities in their extreme forms of expression during the coming weeks. You're due for some major creative breakthroughs. APRIL FOOL! I was kidding. The fact is, you can generate creative breakthroughs in the coming weeks by being poised and composed—not extra neurotic.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): By the time

Leon Edel wrote a five-volume biography of renowned author Henry James. In the course of his research, he read 15,000 letters that were written by James. He came to have a profound familiarity with the great man. In accordance with current astrological omens, I recommend that you choose a worthy character about whom you will become equally knowledgeable. APRIL FOOL! I half-lied. It's true that now is an excellent time to deepen your understanding of people you care about. But don't get as obsessed as Edel!

he was 55 years old, Gemini author Thomas Hardy had written 18 novels and many poems. His stuff was good enough to win him two separate nominations for a Nobel Prize in Literature. But during the last 32-plus years of his life, he never wrote another novel. According to one theory, it was because he was discouraged by the negative reviews he got for his last novel. I suspect you may be at a similar juncture in your life, Gemini. Maybe it's time to give up on a beloved activity that hasn't garnered the level of success you'd hoped for. APRIL FOOL! The truth is, it is most definitely NOT time to lose hope and faith. Don't be like Hardy. Rededicate yourself to your passionate quests.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): Cancerian

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): Virgo author

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): About 2,000 years ago, a Roman woman named Sulpicia wrote six short love poems—a total of 40 lines—that are still being analyzed and discussed by literary scholars today. I bring her to your attention because I think that in the next

four weeks you, too, could generate a small burst of beauty that will still be appreciated 2,000 years from now. APRIL FOOL! I lied about the "small" part. The burst of beauty you create in the immediate future could actually be quite large, as well as enduring.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21): French

poet Louis Aragon (1897–1982) was an influential novelist and a pioneer of surrealistic poetry. Much of his writing had a lyrical quality, and many of his poems were set to music. He also had a belligerent streak. Before the publication of one of his books, he announced that he would thrash any writer who dared to review it in print. Success! There were no critical reviews at all. I recommend his approach to you in the coming weeks. Make it impossible for anyone to criticize you. APRIL FOOL! I lied. I would never suggest that you use violence to accomplish your aims. And besides that, the coming weeks will be a favorable time for you to solicit feedback of all varieties, even the critical kind.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21): I

hesitate to be so blunt, but it's my duty to report the facts. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you should have as many orgasms as possible in the next 15 days. You need to tap into the transformative psychological power that's available through monumental eruptions of pleasure and releases of tension. (P.S. Spiritual orgasms will be just as effective as physical orgasms.) APRIL FOOL! What I just said is true, but I left out an important component of your assignment—Be loving and responsible as you pursue your joyous climaxes, never manipulative or exploitative or insensitive.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19):

Ancient Greek orator Demosthenes was renowned for his skill at delivering powerful, charismatic speeches. While he was still learning his craft, he resorted to extreme measures to improve. For example, there was a time when he shaved just half of his head. It made him ashamed to go out in public, forcing him to spend all his time indoors practicing his speeches. Would you consider a similar strategy right now? APRIL FOOL! I was just messing

with you. It's true that the coming weeks will be a good time to minimize your socializing and devote yourself to hard work in behalf of a beloved dream. But shaving half your head isn't the best way to accomplish that.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18): The coming weeks will be a favorable time for you to tell as many lies as possible if doing so helps you get what you want. I hereby authorize you to engage in massive deceptions, misrepresentations and manipulative messages as you seek to impose your will on every flow of events. APRIL FOOL! I lied. In fact, everything I just said was the exact opposite of your actual horoscope, which is as follows—You have a sacred duty to tell more of the truth than you have ever been able to tell before. As you dig deeper to discover more and more of what's essential for you to understand and express, dedicate your efforts to the goal of gliding along with the most beautiful and interesting flow you can find.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20): Fifteen min-

utes before the Big Bang occurred, where was the matter that now constitutes your body and my body? And if, as seems to be true, the Big Bang was the beginning of time, what time was it fifteen minutes earlier? Questions like these are crucial for you to ponder in the next two weeks. APRIL FOOL! I lied. The questions I articulated should in fact be very low priority for you. In the immediate future, you'll be wise to be as concrete and specific and pragmatic as you can possibly be. Focus on up-close personal questions that you can actually solve, not abstract, unsolvable riddles. THIS WEEK'S HOMEWORK: Tell jokes to humorists. Be extra kind to kind people. Sing songs to the birds. Change the way you change.

freewillastrology.com

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䴀䤀䌀䠀䰀䔀匀䈀伀伀吀䠀

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news of the weird WISHFUL THINKING Police in Las Cruces, New Mexico, who approached a woman driving a stolen car on March 7 were surprised when she identified herself as pop singer Beyonce Knowles, according to police documents. The Las Cruces Sun News reported officers had to use a fingerprint scanner to properly identify Surena Henry, 48. Henry at first ignored police when they tried to pull her over, according to court documents, but they followed her to her home, where she got out of the car but refused to give them her name. She was charged with stealing the vehicle, concealing her identity and resisting arrest. UPDATE News of the Weird reported in July 2017 about Jeff Reitz of Huntington Beach, California, who at that time had just achieved his 2,000th visit to Disneyland in Anaheim. Since then, Reitz, 47, has continued his daily visits—until March 13, when Disney closed its theme parks in response to the COVID-19 outbreak. Reitz was just short of 3,000 visits, the Orange County Register reported, at 2,995. "The streak's been ended," Reitz said. He does not plan to continue his consecutive streak when the park reopens. "On the negative side, I didn't get to choose the end," he said. "But on the positive side, I didn't have to choose the end." While he's practicing social isolation, Reitz plans to watch some movies on ... you guessed it, Disney Plus. PEOPLE ARE GOOD Just a few hours after Harris County, Texas, declared that all bars and nightclubs would have to close on March 16, an anonymous diner at Irma's Southwest restaurant in downtown Houston did their best to help out. The customer, who left a $9, 400 tip, wrote on the receipt: "Hold tip to pay your guys over the next few weeks." United Press International said Irma's will split the tip among the employees, giving them each about $300. I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS Sage Aaron Cummins, 24, of Gallup, New Mexico, woke up one recent morning and found he had two TVs in his room that had not been there the day before. Two days later, he found out an acquaintance was missing two TVs and put two and two together. According to Gallup police, Cummins returned to the victim's apartment with the goods and approached an officer who was there investigating the burglary report. He told the officer he had been "very intoxicated" when he knocked on a door that evening and, when no one answered, he entered the home, but he didn't remember what happened after that. Cummins told police he "wanted to make things right and return the stolen items," according to the Associated Press. Nevertheless, he was arrested and charged with receiving stolen property.

By the Editors at Andrews McMeel

AWESOME! When Alexandria Miller, 28, of Chicago, Illinois, won a two-inch goldfish at a carnival in July 2018, she assumed he would stay the same size. But since then, Gerald the goldfish has grown to be 12 inches long, and Miller has spent $1,300 upgrading his tanks to accommodate him (she's already looking for a bigger one). And, the Mirror reported, Gerald is not shy about getting his needs met. "He does lay around a lot, but it seems when he's bored or hungry, he jumps out of the water and likes to grab the thermometer inside his tank," Miller said. "He'll click it against the glass till he's got our attention." But, she went on, "If I put a smaller fish in there with him, he will eat them." SIGNS OF THE TIMES During the COVID-19 crisis, some people in Japan have resorted to pilfering toilet paper from public restrooms when the rolls became unavailable in stores. One convenience store worker put the power of the supernatural to work against such thefts. Mink Itachibe, who works at a store in the Niigata prefecture, hung signs with images of eyes and kanji characters in front of the toilet paper to curse the tempting rolls. "I did it as a joke, but it seems to have worked," she told CNN. The symbols imply that if someone nips TP from the store, a hungry monster will hunt them down and gobble them up. "People can be quite superstitious in Japan," Itachibe said. •Add to the list of things not to leave in plain sight in your car: toilet paper. Police in Eugene, Oregon, stated that on March 15, a thief shattered the entire back window of an SUV in order to get his mitts on two 30-roll cases of toilet paper, along with other valuables, the Blaze reported. "Anytime vehicles are left unattended for extended periods of time, local thieves view it as a favorable opportunity," police reminded Oregonians. COMPELLING EXPLANATION Slidell, Louisiana, police pulled over a driver on Feb. 27 for an undisclosed reason, but the car's license plate really got their attention. The tag had expired in September 1997— more than 20 years ago—the Miami Herald reported. "Sorry, officer," police said the man told them. "I've been busy lately and totally forgot to renew my vehicle registration. I will take care of it as soon as I get home!" Slidell police posted the incident to their Facebook page, commenting: "For those of you who like to 'switch tags,' at least give us a good challenge." {in}

Send your weird news items to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com March 26, 2020

Independent News | March 26, 2020 | inweekly.net