SELF-CARE FOR NEW PARENTS

As a new parent, it’s easy to find yourself short on internal resources. Surviving on a few hours of sleep and a lot of caffeine just doesn’t cut it when you have a helpless infant depending on you for their every need. While adjusting to life with a baby, it’s important to make sure you’re taking care of yourself, as well.

Self-care as a new parent is critical to making sure you can show up for your family without feeling run ragged, and it can look different for every person. You may hear people try to tell you what self-care is or isn’t, but the truth is only you can define what self-care is for you. The definition I like to go by is that if it helps you feel more whole, more filled up and more like your true self, then it’s self-care and a great thing to incorporate into your life. I like to think of self-care in terms of a hierarchy. At the bottom tier, you have your physical needs: wholesome food, adequate exercise, good sleep and basic hygiene. Next, your mental and emotional needs: time to connect with your partner, family and friends, and time for reflection and emotional processing. Finally, there’s what I like to think of as bonus care: occasional treats that give you an energy boost, such as a spa day or a night out. While those bonus self-care days are really great, they’re not all that effective at keeping your energy levels sustainable if you don’t meet your physical, mental and emotional needs first. While I can’t stress enough that you need to create a self-care routine that works for you, here are some ideas to consider that I personally found improved my life during those first months of new parenthood.

New parents are notorious for forgetting personal hygiene, but for me, getting a shower was a great way to reset my body and mind — even if I couldn’t manage to get one in until late afternoon. Even if the baby won’t stop crying, lay them in a safe place, and allow yourself five to 10 minutes in the shower. They will be OK, and you will be able to come back to them with renewed energy.

Exercise and fresh air are both great ways to refresh the body and spirit as a new parent, and time to connect with your partner is important, as well. Get a good dose of all three by taking a walk together. It can be a short walk around the block or a longer one around a park. If you have someone you can leave the baby with during that time, that’s great, but if not, take them with you.

It can often feel like no one understands what you’re going through as a new parent, but in fact, every parent out there is in the same boat. When my daughter was very young, I connected with a new-parent group and found my time with them incredibly therapeutic. We shared common frustrations, offered one another advice, and supported one another during those tough first years of parenthood.

As a new parent, you can easily find yourself pulled in so many directions that you start to forget who you are. Finding a mindfulness practice, whether you favor meditation, prayer, yoga or something else, allows you to center yourself and find grounding. Make time for this every day, even if it’s just a few minutes. While I often enjoyed a short bedtime yoga practice to calm my nerves, sometimes something as simple as noticing the warm water on my hands as I washed dishes was enough to bring me back to my center.

If you find yourself with severe mental health symptoms during the postpartum period, don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist. Postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety and other postpartum mental health issues can affect both mothers and fathers, and there is no shame in reaching out for help. In fact, it might be a good idea to have a mental health plan lined up prior to your baby’s birth in case you need that life line.

Time might be tight with a new baby in the house or on the way, but by prioritizing your own self-care, you’ll be able to make quality time with your new little one more special.

help. Franciscan Health offers a virtual postpartum depression and anxiety support group, where moms can share their story without feeling judged, and realize that they are not alone. During each online meeting, there is time for questions, sharing and learning self-care tips.

To register and receive a link to the virtual group, call (765) 449-5133. To check out Francsican Health’s other classes in central Indiana, visit franciscanhealth.

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