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FILM: XXX: THE RETURN OF XANDER CAGE

STARRING:Vin Diesel, Deepika Padukone

DIRECTOR: D.J. Caruso �'c;,,

D.J. Caruso, let's call him DJ for fun, is a man with a mission. Mission 'Impassable'.Treading a trickly trippy tactile territory where the slow-drip creativity of the writing team rapidly seeps into thefilm's aggressive action rendering it ineffectual and finally redundant,XXX is strictly for fans of Diesel.

They get their money's worth in his introductory sequence where playing the do-gooder in a Spanish town he steals electrical equipment from on top of a transformer, surf-boards his way through the roads at full speed giving high-fives to the passers-by in cars and trucks, and reaches in time to plug-in the community television for a football game for thekids.

Awwwwwwww!

Life is all about the simple pleasures. XXX: The Return OfXanderCage could

I well be one of them, provided how I simple you like your pleasure. Diesel's opening antics tells us what weknew all along. Diesel playingXander Cage is in this for fun. Director DJ ups the masti quotient to a point where the terror attacks that Cage and his motley team counters appear to be little more than video-games pumped up to be I accommodated on the large screen with mammoth garnish that includes a relentlessly orgasmic background score which reminds us to not take thef lm's derring-do seriously. Not really.

There is an impressively staged shootout d.uring a global summit against terrorism when a super-skilled marauder I crashes through the glass to disrupt the goings-on. DJ knows how turn up I the volume. But he doesn't know how to control the pitch so that the shindigs often get shrill in tone.

Vin Diesel saving the world is a kind of doped-out take on what Tom Cruise and James Bond do on one of their less meaningful days of countering I catastrophe. The arch-villains trying to destroy the world inXXX are a bit of ajoke. At one point a CIA agent is uncovered as a nuke-planting terrorist.

Within minutes, he is swiftly disposed of by Diesel and his team. Momentum be damned. That brings me to Deepika Padukone. Is she or is she not well represented in her first global appearance? The answer to that is not easy. While shemakes an impressive entry into the plot, slipping stealthily through an automatic door beforeit closes on her (somesymbolism in that?) the rest of her role does not allow her thesamefelinegrace. Two others of her female co-stars - Ruby Rose playing a hard-nosed sharp shooter and Nina Dobrev as fast-talking computer nerd - bring far morezing to the table. Andzing, let me tell you, is the thing inXXX.This is a film that beseeches you to set aside all your lofty notions on epic heroism. Saving the world would have never looked more fun had this franchise film only managed to preserve a kindof tongue-in-cheek goofiness that made Deadpoo/ so deadly in its impact.

InXXX: The ReturnOfXander Cage I got the feeling that everyoneis trying to be sassy and cool, and not quitegetting there. The opening in a restaurant has the routinely reliableSamuel L Jackson trying to convince a young sportsman to join theXXX team. Now, this is supposed to be an outrageously funny sequence meant to lull our senses into a state of heightened submissionfor the big bang that follows. However, there are many a slip between the corpse and theirleaps. The poorly written dialogues and the build-up of sequence from bathos to bang is tragically shaky and uncertain. Throughout thefilm the actors are thrown to their owndeviceswhilethe writers and the director think of bigger better ways to fill up the screen with a voluptuousmayhem. While some of the actors come off pretty well considering the anorexia nervosa that grips the plot, Deepika Padukone sadly doesn't make it. And Toni Collette playing what looks a send-off on Judi Dench's "M" is risibly androgynous in her attitude, dress and speech.Shetypifies thefilm's neitherhere-nor-there attitude.

The action is first-rate, though. Thefight-stunt on thef yover and the highway is so commanding that we almost wish the rest of the film would remain the same. Alas, it is downhill all the way, so much so that when the hijinks suddenly end wefind ourselves asking, "Is this it?"

In the climactic finale, a pivotal character watches a prayer-meet for hisown death. I somehow felt the other characters doing the same all through. This franchise is actually dead. It is neither funny nor portentous. It'sjust a whole lot of skilfully executed spectacle looking for a reason to be loved by an audience that doesn't want to go away disappointed.

Even cinematographer Russell Carpenter, who did such a brilliantjob recently in Parched, cannot seem to make senseof the skimpy resources at his disposal. It'slike trying to fit Deepika Padukone's never-ending legs into AbRam Khan's new treehouse.

Nonetheless, if you are willing to go with the furious f ow of mindless mojo, you won't find it hard to enjoy thefilm.

Subhash KJha

Ok Jaanu

STARRING: Aditya Roy Kapur, Shraddha Kapoor,LeelaSamson, Naseeruddin Shah

DIRECTOR: Shaad Ali tt-..;:� · :

A Gen-Y girl and boy meet, are physically attracted, becomefriends, live together,

Coffee With D

STARRING: John Abraham, Sonakshi Sinha, Tahir Raj Bhasin, Adil Husain, Narendra Jha

DIRECTOR: Abhinay Deo *,,,.·:;(' > \(

Coffee with D is a satire designed on the popularity of a primetime news anchor famed for his loud tirade with the appendix, "Thenation wants to know".

In a battlefor TRPs (Television Rating Points) and in order to keep his "news" show af oat and thereby hisjob, news anchor Amab Ghosh (Sunil Grover) devises an idea to invite the Pakistanbased dreaded underworld don 'D' to his show. How he goes about organising this shenanigan, forms the crux of the tale.

Director Vishal Mishra's story has an interesting premise. On the face of it, it sounds great, but the wafer-thin plot and the languid pace of the film, along with its one-dimensional and poorly etched characters who aremoulded as caricatures, is its undoing.The writing, barring a few dialogues, is replete with mediocrity. The forced attempt at humour is stereotypical and trite. While the entire first half is focussed sans any commitment, then eventually fall in love and get married. Familiar? Extremely. Trite, oft-seen and offering nothing new. That in a nutshell, isShaad Ali's OKJaanu.

Adi (Aditya Roy Kapur), a fun-loving, small town guy who creates video games, aspires to make it big and settle down in the US but does not believe in marriage. Tara (Shraddha Kapoor), a girl from a broken home who abhors the institution of marriage, is studying architecture and hopes to pursue further studies in Paris.They meet by chance and are attracted instantly and become friends. Living together where neither of them can haqjutao on the other, is theirconvenient arrangement. They are happy together, partying, going on long drives and yes, even sleeping together.

Sadly, the f lm is predictable from word go and drags at an even keel, offering no twists or drama, making the viewing extremely tedious. The treatment too is not novel and offers nothing that has not been portrayed earlier. Thefilm is a mish-mash of several such films with the same theme. Garbed in artifice, the story credited to Mani Ratnam adds no magic to the film.

Aditya Roy Kapur is competent and essays his happy-go-lucky character with ease but is bound by the limited script which does not allow him to go beyond a certain level. His chemistry with Shraddha Kapoor is palpable, but that's all there is to it.

Shraddha Kapoor too is her usual confident and charming self, but is not able to add any nuance to her f at character.

Naseeruddin Shah as theJudge, in whose houseAdi lives,is a treat to watch. He is effortless in his portrayal of the loving and caring husband to his wife Charu (Leela Samson) who suffers from Alzheimer's disease.

Leela Samson is endearing and natural, but Kitu Gidwani, in a miniscule role as Tara's high-profile mother, offers nothing by way of performance.

The climax is stretched unnecessarily if only to make the young couple realise and declare their lovefor each other with the devotion of the older couple towards each other as the backdrop. A deliberate attempt that appears very contrived.

Thescenes appear disconnected and the actions of the characters often defy logic. Shaad Ali merely goes on with the narrative, as if with a set intention of telling a story, no matter how cliched. There is no element of freshness to the plot.

A.R. Rahman's music is the only solace the film offers and thenew rendition of 'Humma Humma' is a good attempt and well-picturised, albeit in its modern avatar. Unfortunately, Gulzar's dialogues too fail to leavean impact, as in keeping with thef avour of the film, thelines lack depth.

Overall, OKJaanu is a strictly ok film, devoid of anything new or interesting.

TroyRibeiro

on building the aura of Arnab and his predicament, the second half concentrates on his interview with D. Overall, the screenplay lacks drama and excitement. Also, the performances by the lead characters seem staged and theatrical.

Sunil Grover, the stand-up comedian reputed for his popular comic characters in several avatars, is a competent actor, but is miscast in the roleof a suave news anchor. Nevertheless, minus the persona of the character he delivers as an actor.

AnjanaSukhani as his pregnant wife Parul, is effortlessly natural. Dipannita Sharma as Neha,Amab's colleague who accompanies him to Pakistan for the interview, is painfully cliched.

Pankaj Tripathi as Girdhari, D's Man-Friday, shines in a nuanced performance.

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Zakir Hussain's portrayal of D lacks lustre. The character is crafted in a perfunctory manner and the actor does not offer anything new to his role. The comic lines he mouths undoubtedly elicit a few chuckles.

The rest of the cast members that propel the humour in the narrative are stereotypical and insufferable.

With moderate production values and tacky sets,cinematographer Anshul Chobey's static and boring frames capture the drama befitting a television broadcast.

The 2D graphics in the film in the song sequence, and as a scene, are equally amateurish and insipid.

With a run-time of over two hours, the film drags unnecessarily. A few minutes into thefilm and the novelty factor wears offwith the narrative fatigue setting in.

In his directorial debut,Vishal Mishra disappoints as hefails to wield the baton effectively.The film is mediocre fare and you can safely avoid this coffee, unless you are a Sunil Groverfan.

TroyRibeiroo