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We hear and ignore words of wisdom from our elders all the time, but actually listening can help improve our life

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BY SHAFEEN MUSTAQ

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MI never liste n co them and most of the time they are right, but here are a few gems from chem (said in a very offhand passing manner which is probably why I remember chem more than the 'sir down and let me tell you about Life' lectures) that I have taken to heart.

1 was sitting with my dad and whining abou t how ha.rd my lLfe is and how my friends could go wherever chey wanted and do whatever they wanted, and how come I wasn't allowed? He paused tapping away at the iPad , looked up at me over his glasses and said, "You are allowed. I raised you, fed you, educated you. I have done my job. You are now allowed co do whatever you like. But just remember chat I have already been where you are. So if l tell you not co do something or not co mix with someone, the.re is usually a very good reason for it, a reason l do not always have to disclose co you. If you were strong enough in yom faith to pull peop le into tb e gravity of your goodness, then you cou ld mix with whomever you wauc. But you are not neither am 1. So be selective with whom you mi'< with!"

Ammu always tends to become ve r y philosophical when she's in the kitchen, as i f peeling potacoes and chopping onions helps release her inner Confucius. One day as we worked cogetber she said to me, "Be ready for change. Wake up every day as if something good will happen today. lt is only when you ready yourself for good things, that good things will come to you" At the time I laughed it off, but in the coming days l would wake up aud sar those words to myself, ''Something good will happen today''. Slowly I began to dress more carefully, because something good would happen today. I began to live in the present and be more aware of my surroundings, because something good would happen today. And then I realised, something good 111as happening coday! And every day! When I am dressed for today, when I am Living in the present and thinking in the present, I am better placed to recognise the goodness in every day and be grateful for it.

At another such time in the kitchen again she said co me, ''\Y/e can all pray for your funrre but till yo u pray for yoursel f and do something to help yoursel f, why should God help you?" I spend so much of m y time watching TV shows or on Facebook, if only 1 had invested a small portion of that time on my mind, body and soul, on prayers, exercise and meditation, I would be much better p laced as a human being and in my own spirin,aJiry ro tackle life head -on A small reminder to pray even for a minute each day makes a huge difference. A small step in stopping an action that causes you harm such as smoking, makes a huge difference. Only you can help yom own cause.

And lastly, this one is for all you single laclies (and lads) out tl1ere. 1vfy dad has these words of wisdom to impart. "So wha t if yo u're n ot married? YoLt took a step cowards God and He is testing how stron g your step is. Are you faltering?" We arc all amazing in ou r ow n ways, we all deserve love and happine ss. When you stick to yourse lf, when you uphold you r values, when you refrain from indulging yom need for love for a greater purpose, it hurts. Sometimes a lorl But you are not alone. You are not the first co go through this, and you won't be tl1e last So d o n't falter. Be steadfast in you.r goals, pray, focus a nd achieve them. And go give a hug to your amazing parents who sometimes sa1 the darndest things!

Pick a trendy theme to match your personality and style this summer

Androgyny

Don'r you just l ove the long days of summer, with entertaining, activities and endless fun? Even if it is back to schoo l and work, it's sc iJI too early to say goo dbye to barbeques in t he back yard, picnics in the park and light 'n' airy summer outfits to dress u p for these occasio ns

I d id somerbing exciting chis summer holiday, and ch ar is where inspiration scrnck me to w r ite about outdoor fashion ideas. 1 went camping! I had reservations about ch is adventure, but spending the night at Cock atoo Is land with a fancy 360 degree ill uminated city view was a bit too hard to refi..tse. An d the result was some fabulous outdoor fashion ideas with a hint of chic and sophistication.

Some fashion rbemes work really well wirh outdoor fun, so pick any chat b lends with your activity, personali cy or simply be adventurous

Bohemian

rreod is about embracing ethnic prints and flowing forms

Printed panes are kind of a part of this theme. These are the soft flowing cotton ones, or rhe harem pants style with Aztec prints, or - even Indian b lo ck prints and ikat.

Pair thern with a solid- coloured LOp and a l ong neck-piece with a cli'.ssel pendant for a fun look. If you are a lover of dresses, team up a maxi <lress in cool colours with Oat bliog sandals and a messenger bag. \X! b ile prints are principally die heart of t his look, you can even wear plain bright -coloured dresses w ith a bandhani print or ba 11jara mirrorwork bagaod lots of layered bracelets tool ow what is this? Is it really a rrend? Believe me, it is; not necessarily one I advocate, but 1 like to step out of m y comforc zone from to time an d chaUenge a comp letely fem· style! Yes, the androgyny trend is ki 'dressing like a male'. Ir's not qr· as one would tend to p icmr is to balance a sbarp loo cool, breezy t, mat skim your be a body- hugging fit, look. Adding that fun princ accessory will alway s this look quite appropriate let your imagination run wild (pun intended) !

Timeless chic

For me, nothing is more timeless than stripes.Contrary to some beliefs diac horizontal stripes make you look bigger, 1 find them reaUy chic. It all depends on the colour and pattern of the stripes. I can assure you d1at there is no limit to st:yling stri pes into ,a sophisticated omfit. Stt ipes with red accessories makes me dunk of a European boli<lay for some reason ! I haye' made the most of m y b o xy shape<l stcipe<l tee and bl ack and while striped dress this season. Pair stripes with black and white, brights and even neons, and you will neYer be disappointed with these hard-working pieces from your wardrobe!

Cheery brights

What is summer without some brilliant pieces to Aaunt? I personally lo ve co combine cheery bright tops with my crisp white jeans and they jmt work perfectly, especially when a contrasting accessory is thrown into the mix. Like a lemon yellow top, white jeans and a fuch sia bead necklace, or a tangerine shift dress with a mint baub le necklace. The key lie.~ in balancing the <lose of coloUL I would neither have too much 'matchy' nor ·clashy'. An injection of neon can be good coo, go for an accessory if r ou ate coo worried about picking clothing in diese colouts 1 hope you enjoy these summer nights and days ro the fuUest by be.tog inspired co rry om one or more of these themes, adding more fun co your outdoor attire!

Take a look around you. Do you know seven people?

Psst guess what? One of them is a phobic!

A phobia is an irrational fear and anxiety disorder in which a person experiences persistent dread of a situation, creature, place or thing. Sufferers go to extreme measures to steer clear of triggers and if confronted with it, they can break out in cold sweat, experience shortness of breath, chest constriction, nausea and shivers. To date there are 530 types of documented phobias and about 1 in 7 of us suffer from one.

Some phobias are fairly common, like claustrophobia (fear of confined spaces); arachnophobia (fear of spiders); and acrophobia (fear of heights). And then there are some that elicit a dropped-jaw, wide-eyed, stop-in-your-tracks reaction. We've waded through pools of research to pick what we believe are the strangest of paranoias. Tighten your seatbelt and whizz through our list of top ten weirdest phobias.

10 Cathisophobia : Fear of sitting down

Sit tight for this one, cathisophobia is a rare psychological disorder that sends the sufferer in panic mode at the thought of sitting down. Haemorrhoids, physical abuse and punishment by being forced to sit on sharp objects are considered possible reasons for developing this irrational fear. Some cathisophobics only experience symptoms of anxiety at the thought of sitting down in the presence of celebrities and elites.

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. Zemmiphobia : Fea r of the great mole rat

The three blind mice very likely chased the farmer's wife to this. Zemmiphobia is a little known anxiety disorder, defined by a morbid fear of the mole rat. As suggested by the name, the mole rat is a kind of rat behaving like a mole. It is devoid of hair, has small beady eyes, sharp teeth and is blind. An unfortunate experience with rats or moles could l ead to zemmiphobia, or it could be bought on by the somewhat off-putting naked appearance of the creature.

8 Geumophobia : Fear of taste

We thought this one must be hard to live w ith, literally! How would you survive if you started hyperventilating at the sight of food? To our relief geumophobia or geumatophobi a is an exaggerated and unreal fear of taste which can bring a panic attack on the sufferer at the idea of tasting something new or something with a specific flavour like sour, bitter, salty or even sweet. Traumatic experience of being forced to taste something horrible as a form of torture, could be a possible cause of this phobia.

6. Phobophobia: Fear of phobias

This has to be the mother of all phobias. Phobophobia is generally thought to take root in people already suffering from some phobia. Having experienced a panic or anxiety attack as a result ofthat, leads them to start fearing the symptoms brought about by a phobia hence resulting in phobophobia, the fear of developing or experiencing a phobia

5. Omphalophobia : Fear of belly buttons

Pick your jaw up if it just dropped and believe it, omphalophobia is a recognised condition in which a person suffers great distress at the sight of belly buttons. Beaches and pools are no-go zones for them. They cannot bear the sight of someone else's belly button being touched, let alone their own. Some go to great lengths to protect their navel by covering it with plaster and never wandering near it during showers.

4 . Epistemophobia: Fear of knowledge

An epistemophobe just doesn't wanna know! That's a pretty accurate description for this unusual fear of knowledge. People with this phobia will do anything to remain in the dark. They shun books, newspapers and even television. The phobia could have been bought on by learning about things that caused problems for the sufferer, and the overwhelming feeling that not knowing would have been better.

3. Clinophobia: Fear of going to bed

This abnormal and persistent fear of going to bed and sleep i ng could stem from worrying about having nightmares or a prob lem controlling bedwetting. Clinophobia can develop into insomnia which can be greatly detrimental to a person's health.

2 Geniophobia: Fear of chins

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Dextrophobia : Fear of objects on the right side of the body

No kidding, this is an obsessive-compulsive personality phobia, with its very own twin levophobia, or fear of objects on the left side of the body. A person suffering from dextrophobia is obsessed with maintaining order on the right side ofthe body. Like needi ng things to be just so on their workstation or bedside table. Chaos or lack of organisation of things on the right can bring on a fullblown panic attack with chest constriction, gulping for breath and crying.

By the hair of your chinny chin chin, if your jaw is not absolutely perfect a geniophobe will not let you in. People with this phobia are obsessed with other peoples ' chins especial l y imperfect ones. They avoid interacting with people who they consider have hideous chins and in extreme cases become introvert because of it

1. Eu phobia: Fear of heari ng good news

This, we felt, had to top the list of the weird and unusual phobias out there. After al l who doesn't like hearing good news? Well, people with euphobia don't. Instead offeeling el ated at hearing good news, they feel anxious and start panicking. They thrive in the negative and enjoy chaos around them. Possible reasons for developing euphobia could be persistent disappointment after hearing good news that didn't turn out to be true.

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Seeking qualified Hindu match for our daughter, 5'1 '; 26 years, vegetarian. Born and brought up in Sydney with Indian fami ly values Completed dentistry from Sydney University, working as a dental surgeon. Contact father in Australia at rlagrawal55@gmail.com

Parents seeking match for fair, slim Hindu Sindhi girl who is 33 years, 156cm working as lecturer at a leading university. Permanent resident of Austra lia with dual degree M.Com (Accounts and Finance), fond of sports, travelling and cooking. We are a tight knit, professional family. Please mai l proposal with education, job details and recent photo to: mohri1324@gmail.com or call 0406 608 146.

Seeki Ng Brides

Hindu Panchal boy, 29 years old, 5'-4'; 52 kg, completed Master of Professional Accounting, wo rking as Accountant in CPA Firm, WA 6233, seeking su itabl e girls. Please send details to san10 _ 1984@yahoo.com

Christian Catholic boy from North India, 27 years, never-married, highly qualified, interested settling in Australia, seeks alliance from well settled, qualified Christian girl, contact with details anandita.egbert@gmail.com

Fiji Indian male Australian citizen from Melbourne, mid-forties, invites correspondence from single or divorced females (no kids) for re lationship or marriage. Please contact on 0478 083 457.

Indian man late 40s, Australian citizen, educated, seeks honest Indian lady for marriage

Contact tamaya@hotmail.com

Alliance invited for well educated , never-married, 5'9'; Sikh Khatri boy, who was born in 1975. Looking for compatible Sikh girl from Australia. Early marriage. Phone: 0415 079 724 or email: jas ghai01@hotmail.com

Can you Help?

There are many children with individual needs who due to a disability requ ire constant care. This care fal ls d irectly on the shoulders of their fam ily.

We need someone like you - Someone who is caring and patient : who won't see the disabil ity, but see their own ability to help

With training and support you can help give these families much needed respite. Two days a month is all it takes to support a family.